#❛ * ｡ ☆┊setting fire to the sky. 「 snapchat. 」

[xiaoluclair]

hiii x, 16 or 23 + chalex 🥹

helloo, my love! righto, righto--

16. lazily + 23. in relief // cl16.aa23 // G

Charles had not meant to set the sink on fire. Truthfully, he was not even sure how it had happened. He was just there, an innocent bystander watching the Snapchat notifications light up his phone on the countertop, and then.

Well.

"This is what you get," Max was preaching over the blare of the fire alarm, "when you fraternize with the British."

Fraternize, thought Charles. Sure. Like sharing Snapchat handles was fraternizing. He slipped on a step and cursed many things. Someone caught him by the forearm and George said, "Careful there, mate." And if George was here then.

Charles glanced around as they hit the ground floor. Out on the grass, it was too dark to see much. Tall people blocked out other tall people blocked out shorter people. It was sort of tragic, really. It was also freezing.

"Danny," someone yelled from a window in Klamidia, "what's going on?"

"No idea," Daniel called back. He turned to Max. "What is going on?"

"No idea," Max parroted. Charles should probably be grateful for that one. Max sent him a look that suggested it, heavily.

The fire department rolled up around a minute later, to a filled field of grass and a slightly orange glow coming from the fourth floor of Gonuria. "Ah shit," said Pierre. "I left my laptop unlocked."

"Why is that a problem?" asked Liam.

"Did all your flatmates get out?" Charles suddenly asked, before Pierre had to try and fumble his way out of legally illegal things.

Liam nodded. "Yeah. You can see them over there, see. Alex was out though, so he'll get back to a lovely surprise."

Charles had not known that. It was hard to tell where Alex was through his Snaps. Usually they included some part of his face screwed up in an odd expression, and an unassuming backdrop. The ceiling or the sky, usually. Sometimes his red comforter.

Oscar appeared next to them. "Is everyone okay?"

"Yeah," said Liam. "Lando's fine."

Oscar colored a little, like he didn't cross from his own, perfectly intact building at 3 in the morning, to see if his crush was okay. "That's not what I."

"Sure." Liam grinned. Charles did too, but he was also tired. That, and he'd been realizing for the past two minutes that he had left his phone in the kitchen currently on fire. "He's over there, by the way. Want me to call him over?"

"Nah, just leave him-"

"Lando!"

"Oh my God, Liam-"

Charles gathered himself to the stone partition at the edge of the grass, and found a space not taken up by other students to huddle against. Pierre followed, shoeing at the mud with his heel. Last time they'd had a fire, it had been two hours before they'd been allowed back inside. Charles was not letting his feet take that chance, even if it meant soggy ass. He'd take it.

At some point, he must've fallen asleep. Or, been teasing the edge of it for at least a good half hour, because everything was murmur when he came to. And he came to, because-

"Sorry," said Alex, blurry between the crack of Charles's eyelids. "I didn't mean to wake you up."

Charles felt his lips move like two swollen, sleepy bumblebees. "Wasn't asleep."

Alex laughed, and it sounded a little like his usual laugh, but not like it at all. Something in Charles lit up regardless. "Sure, mate."

Charles could feel himself frown slightly. He rubbed his eyes. Failed to stifle a yawn. "You okay?"

Maybe Alex swallowed. "Yeah," he said, and his arm brushed Charles's through layers of zip-up hoodies. "Just, uh. Is your phone dead?"

"Hm? Oh, I left it in the apartment, I think." Tried to think, anyway. It felt like trying to win a tug of war against a battalion of roided elephants. "Yeah, on the counter." Alex was quite close, he thought. His hair looked ten shades in the shadows, and Charles could imagine the uneven washout of red and blond and middleground-pink. "Why?"

"George texted me about the fire," said Alex. "You never opened my snap, and I guess my mind." He broke. "Got away from me a little."

Charles felt himself smile, and Alex's disappeared behind a blink that lasted maybe three to five business years. He was not sleeping. He was saying, "I'm okay."

Listening to Alex reply, "Yeah." He sounded more like himself. Relieved too, maybe. "You are. You should also sleep, you're practically unconscious on my arm here."

"Not," Charles might have said.

"Jesus, you're cute," Alex might have replied.

And then. It got a little hazy here. Someone nearby said something about plumbing. Charles might have said something about plumbing. Alex, he was pretty sure, laughed. The inside of Charles's chest, whatever that was between his ribs, turned an unethical viscosity. Then he turned, a little, and his mouth may have touched, just lightly, the underside of Alex's face.

Or, it would have done. Hypothetically. If Alex had not turned at the same time and. Boom. boom, even - lowercase. Nothing much happened. Other than, "Next time," said Alex, very quietly, "you decide to set something on fire, try and keep your phone on you." Then he nudged against Charles's sleepy mouth again, the cold tips of their noses together. Charles wondered - suddenly, worryingly warm - if firemen could hose down the inside of a body. He'd ask. Later.

[dearreader]

i’m really tempted to make a list of disasters 911 covers before they even TOUCH a wild fire. like this show is set in california, SPECIFICALLY LA COUNTY, and they’re willing to do a whole ass bee tornado [yes i know tornados have happened in california! i’ve lived through several warnings and one touched down in my backyard this past year] before even touching on the disaster that devastates the state the most and basically unites all of us together. like i love the show and im not hating on it, i just find it funny how they keep trying to out do themselves with season premiere and season finale big show stopping disasters when the one that would not only make the most sense but would mean a lot to the state if done right is never touched.

like i still have vivid memories of my dad telling my sister and i to pack go bags when i was five incase we had to evacuate while he tried to find dog friendly hotels because someone started a fire near my elementary school. i remember staring out the car window as a sophomore while my dad was driving me home early from school because of another fire and seeing it raging so close to houses of people me and my sister knew at school. i remember my sophomore year of college watching the sky turn apocalyptic red and black because of the camp fire in 2018. i then remember coming home the next day only to be faced with all the devastation of the malibu fire in socal. FUCK man this past year someone pushed their car into a ditch in bidwell park in chico and walked away causing ONE OF THE BIGGEST fires in california history and seeing my friend show me updates via snapchats and watching the smoke reach across my old job.

like i know all the stories 911 pulls from are real and there are reasons they won’t do a wild fire episode. but i just get kinda upset and annoyed they won’t talk about wildfires and what they’re like or the impact they have. cause local firefighters can get called in and… i just really wish they’d do a wildfire episode. but instead they’re doing a bee tornado…

[randomhorrorstories]

Chapter Two: Death is Upon Us

warnings: strong language, strong horror violence, death, murder, mentions of sex, drug use, alcohol use -- please read at your own risk!! word count: 3,007 Series 1

Kristine's point of view. 

Kristine watches as Thomas makes his way back, uneased before taking a seat in Cheryl's empty spot. She then wondered where Judith was at since she didn't see her at the moment, however, she didn't think much of it since she was inside somewhere pouting.

"Hey, Thomas. Where's Judith?"

"She's inside one of the extra bedrooms asleep. She's in trouble with our mom." Thomas responds, grabbing a cigarette from his pocket and lights it. He takes a couple drags, as everyone around him observes. 

Kristine nodded and looked away as something seemed off, taking a sip of her wine. She held a half eaten graham cracker in her other hand with Steve resting his right hand on her thigh, who was cuddled beside her in the loveseat. Sometime later, Mary and Pamela as well as Joshua and William decide to go to bed. Steve decided to put out the fire, telling Kristine to go ahead inside. Above, the sound of thunder roars in the night sky as light droplets of water rain down on the town of Autumnvale. 

Kristine saunters off and steps into the house, grabbing something to drink before she walks into the guest room. She sets down her cup and grabs her suitcase, grasping onto a two piece sleep set. She strips to just her panties, sliding the top and bottoms on. Kristine then steps into the bathroom to brush her teeth then finally sliding into bed, under the soft duvet. Steve enters their shared bed and joins Kristine. She snuggled against his warm chest and fell asleep almost immediately since the early morning ride tired her out. 

???'s point of view.

With everyone else snuggled in their beds, Cheryl lies awake searching for nearby clinics on her phone, so she can get the much needed medical attention she deserves. Thomas is asleep beside her, snoring softly as she ignores it. The last time they were together was the night they had a one night stand with each other… and later, the condom broke without their knowledge. And so, here they are deciding what to do with the unborn child that's growing inside Cheryl's stomach. She sighs before turning her phone off and going to sleep. Mary, who is alone in her room, stares intently at the screen wondering what to say to her love interest, fumbling with her comforter and yawning at the same time. 

She too puts her phone away and goes to sleep, forgetting about it and just sleeping so she can have energy to talk tomorrow. Pamela is a night owl, so she likes to stay awake. She sits in the arm chair in the corner of her bedroom and takes a puff of her vape, inhaling the watermelon ice flavor as she then blows it out. Her hair is tied in a messy bun and she wears a black tank top with gray sweatpants. Pamela knew something was off with Thomas, needing an answer to the problem since she is kinda nosey (that is the way some people put it). She quickly grabs her phone and sends him a quick message, making sure everything is okay. Of course, no one responds since everyone is most likely asleep . She shuts her phone off before sliding into bed and setting her vape on the nightstand.

Judith's point of view.  

Later that night, Judith awakes to the sounds of giggling and a headboard lightly hitting against the wall. She groans, not wanting to know who's having sex at this time of night. The tired female slides out of bed and trudges out her bedroom, entering the long dark corridor. She enters the kitchen to fix herself a late night snack, grabbing her phone from her pocket. Judith rummages through each and every cabinet, searching for something to feast on. She does manage to find a box of Pop Tarts , pulling a package from the box whilst unlocking her phone. She scrolls through Instagram and then Snapchat , seeing people she knew from high school posting about lame parties or getting drunk somewhere in a deserted mall parking lot. 

“Wish I were doing something fun instead of being stuck here with my brother, and his stupid friends.” She groans at herself, taking a bite. The chocolate flavor fulfills her mouth, savoring the sweet bite.

The house was a little too quiet. Suddenly, there's a loud noise from outside the cabin, making Judith startle. She almost drops her phone and stays in her spot, staring out the back door. She hesitates, wondering if she should investigate outside the cabin. Deciding to follow the noise, the teen steps toward the entrance. Her hand reaches for the doorknob, turning the handle and peeking outside. Many large trees surround the area, unbeknownst that someone is standing in the dark with shrubs surrounding the tall, male figure. 

A short, dark haired female jumps in front of Judith and scares her tremendously. Nevertheless, she didn't scream, just let out a whimper. "Jesus. Don't do that!" 

The female gives a cheeky grin. “Okay… you needed a little scare. It’s fun!” 

"Why are you here?" Judith questions. 

"To hangout with you of course. I have the good stuff. It'll take you down and out with just three puffs. Plus, I couldn't sleep." 

Judith folded her arms to her chest. "Me too. Someone is having sex in the room next to mine. Let's go further in the woods, so my older brother doesn't see me." 

“You mean your hot, older brother? God, I wanna get personal with that. His muscles are sexy, especially on his recent Instagram post.” 

"Eww. He's disgusting, you're disgusting. And I don't think he'll get with you. He has a girlfriend, who he knocked up. I heard the conversation earlier tonight."

"Damn." Sophia says, defeated. However, she goes on about her business.

"Anyway, if we're gonna do this, then we need to do it now. I don't want to be here, especially when there are people screwing in the room next to mine." 

The two teens escape towards the woods, finding a secluded spot. Judith takes a seat on a large log, same with Sophia as she gets the joints ready to use. The blonde watches carefully to learn how to roll a joint, wanting to do it for herself and not ask for help like she's never smoked pot before. 

“You’re staring,” 

"I wanna know where you learned to do this?" 

"Ninth grade. Under the bleachers in the football field. I was with Chad Lewinski—"

"Oh, my God that guy you were crushing on for four years, taught you how to roll a joint?" 

"Yup, pretty much. That is also when I got my first kiss too. Apparently, he liked me back. However, when he got to camp last summer, he got made fun of by those shitty students from Dakota Hill Preparatory School and slashed his wrists in the woods." 

"What the fu..?"

"Yeah, some asshole from the school found him bleeding out and died on the way to hospital." 

As tears well up in her eyes, a droplet rolls down her cheek as she wipes it away, looking back at Judith. Sophia took a breath, finishing with the joints. She holds one of the joints in front of the blonde.

“Here. Try it out. See if you like it or not.” 

Judith takes the joint and sets it between her fingers, ready to smoke it as Sophia searches for her lighter. Unfortunately, she can't seem to find it, rummaging through her pockets and small handbag. 

"Fuck, I left my lighter in the rental car."

"I can search for one inside the house. I'm pretty sure there's one somewhere." 

"Okay, well, hurry back. It's getting chilly out here and I wanna get high." 

"Alright, alright. I'm going." 

Judith rises, making her way back to the cabin and enters. She quickly checks to make sure no one is up, carefully rummaging through the drawers in the kitchen. She continues on searching, having no luck. 

In the woods, Sophia sets the joint down on the log and sighed. She sat there waiting impatiently for Judith, grabbing her phone and taking a selfie before posting it on social media. She smirks to herself without knowing that someone was behind her. She ignored her surroundings, putting her guard down. She waits for her friend to come back, sondering if it was even worth it coming out here to surprise Judith and smoke pot with her. That was until a tall male appeared behind her, wrapping his hand around her face – resting on her mouth, keeping her silent as she began to panic. He quickly brings his arm up, wielding a sharp blade while Sophia looks around helplessly, dropping the weed onto the grassy wooded ground. Without pausing, the masked assailant holds a Bowie knife before slitting her throat. She gags and chokes as blood gushes from the wound before falling off the log, lying there lifeless. He crept back into the shadows, making his way closer to an unsuspecting woman who owned the nearby cabin. 

Judith finally found a lighter.

It was bigger than what Sophia usually had, but hey, it'll do for the time being. She quickly grabs it and leaves, entering the wooded area as she approaches Sophia, seeing her slumped over. She believed that she found the lighter and got high, accidentally falling asleep on Judith as she stalked closer to the body. She looked closely, seeing the gash on her throat. She jumped back afraid, covering her mouth with her hand. Hot tears began flowing from her eyes and her breathing became ragged. She ushered away and toward the cabin. She ran up to the back door, but it was locked from the inside as she questioned what's going on.

Was this some stupid prank her best friend was pulling?

She jiggled the doorknob and tried getting in, hitting her body against the door as she tried to break her way in before giving up. The killer makes way behind her, slashing her arm with the sharp blade. Judith screams before running away, nearing the front porch when she trips and falls. Blood drips down her arm, checking it while she holds the wound with her hand. She trips and falls stepping up the stairs, making way toward the door. Judith jiggles the knob frantically before taking off and hiding behind the garage. She sobs quietly, covering her mouth with her other hand, squinting her eyes as she prays this nightmare ends. 

The sound of a twig snapping breaks Judith out of her survival thoughts, breathing heavily before seeing a shadow approach her. The male finds Judith, instantly grabbing her throat with his large hand and strangling her. Judith struggles, grabbing his arms to try and force him away, blood gushing more. He punches her in the face, leaving her with a bloodied and possibly broken nose. Weakened, the killer stabs her repeatedly before dragging her body away and thrown in the grass as she looks up at the trees above, heavy rain pouring down on her body. She must stay alive, to warn her brother that there is a killer out and about. Though, she can't move, staying there and getting weaker. Her eyes close with her head rolling to the side , lifeless and still. 

~~

The following after came quickly. The sun is bright and hot as it had already soaked up the rain from last night, plus it has created a beautiful sunset as it pears over the Rocky Mountains. Steve was the first one up, sitting in the kitchen and drinking a cup of coffee with a newspaper in hand. Thomas walks into the room , eyeing the newspaper in Steve's hand, trying to make sure he wasn't tripping out on anything. 

"Dude, is that newspaper? What year are we in, 1985?" 

"I thought I'd read something different then scroll through social media like everyone else." 

"Okay, grandpa." Garrett joked, chuckling.

"Oh, ha ha, Garrett. How'd you take the news from Cheryl last night?" 

"Not good, honestly. I smoked myself into a coma last night -- Wait, how did you know she's pregnant?"

“Kristine told me yesterday when she found out after Cheryl took a test.

"Huh, okay."

"What are you gonna do?" 

"I'm letting Cheryl make her decision, and whatever she decides, I'll be there for her. I will try and help in any way possible."

"Okay," Steve replied, sipping his steamy coffee.

"So... what's everyone doing today?"

"I think swimming in the lake. I overheard Mary talking to Pamela, but I don't know."

Garrett shifts his stance, reaching into a cabinet to grab a coffee cup and pours himself some coffee. He leans against the counter. He sips the coffee, watching as Cheryl makes her way into the kitchen.

"Morning, babe."

"Yeah, yeah. Good morning." She replied.

She glanced at the cups of coffee, looking more green than usual. Cheryl quickly turned her heel and ushers to the nearest bathroom, shutting the door behind her.

"Morning sickness,"

"Morning what?"

Kristine stares at him dumbfounded, rolling up the sleeve of her cream colored sweater.

"Yeah, morning sickness. It's something women go through during their first trimester of pregnancy. It doesn't happen to all women, but some get it. My mom did."

Kristine stepped toward Steve, greeting him with a soft but warm kiss. She leaned herself against the island counter, looking toward Garrett.

"What does someone do for morning sickness?"

"Ginger ale, crackers -- preferably saltines."

The male nodded, searching through the cabinets in the kitchen. Mary enters, holding a vanilla scented candle before setting it down, and rummaging through each drawer for a lighter.

"Hey, has anyone seen the lighter? It's a long, blue wand-thing."

"No,"

"Uh-uh,"

"We've only been here for one night, there's no way one of us had taken it. Unless..." Kristine trails off.

"What?" Mary asks.

"Someone else took it. Who else is here?"

"Pamela, but she vapes. So there's no way she does."

"And Cheryl's pregnant, so it's definitely not her."

Mary pauses, turning around to face the three other adults in the room. "Pregnant?"

"Yeah,"

"Holy shit, congrats Garrett. You're gonna be a father!"

"Yeah, but she may be thinking about another option instead of keeping it."

"And how would you know that? Huh?" Cheryl presses, raising a brow.

Garrett turned to face her. "Oh, I -- I don't--"

"I still haven't made a decision yet, so don't bring this stuff up on me."

"Alright,"

"So, what are we doing today?"

"Well, before we leave, I thought about lighting a candle. For some reason, it smells funny in here. We could go down to the heated indoor pool."

"That sounds nice."

"Hey, by chance, does anyone know if Judith used the lighter?" Kristine questions.

"No. The only thing she brought was a duffle bag of outfits for a week. And plus, it's still in the living room. Little shit always leaves it for the adults. Why do you ask?"

"Do you think she used the lighter for, uh, I don't know, cigarettes, weed?"

"She got in trouble for... oh, shit!" Thomas shouts.

He enters the living room and goes through his younger sister's duffle bag. Thomas dumps out the bag, seeing various items. He finds a couple notebooks, a medical pouch, a ziploc bag full of moss-looking substance before rising.

"That little... She never used it. This would be gone so fast, you wouldn't even know she had smoked it."

"We need to find her,"

"I'll go check the woods,"

"I'll go with you, Kris." Garrett insisted as Steve gave them a look of uncertainty.

"Mary and I will check the garage,"

"I'll check the pool room and the shed." Steve added.

They spread out and search for Judith.

Kristine and Garrett make descend further into the wilderness, calling her name in case she got lost or something. The male continued calling out his sisters name, hoping she's just pulling a prank and hiding somewhere to scare them.

"Judith!" Kristine shouts before repeating her name. "Judith!"

"Judith Marie Baker!"

Kristine pauses in her tracks, listening scrupulously to hear if she can make out any minimal sounds. Garrett pulled his phone out, dialing his sister's number and listens carefully. The sound of ringing is nearby but faint as the two adults follow the sound. Garrett and her finally approach the noise, stumbling on something as it makes Kristine fall. She lands on the ground, not noticing a dead body next her.

"Garrett, I think a branch -- a branch tripped me."

"That wasn't a branch, Kristine. That was a fucking leg -- That's Judith's leg. Fuck." He exclaimed. His voice was full of panic.

Garrett went silent, staring down at something that made Kristine follow his gaze. She turned her head to the body next to her when the lifeless face of Judith catches her eye causing a scream to slip from her mouth. Multiple wounds fill her torso whilst the older female struggles to get up. Judith's eyes were cold and lifeless, making things even more eerie. Kristine manages to rise, grabbing onto Garrett's arm, trying to drag him away, however, he breaks away from her grip and kneels beside his younger sister. He scooped her dead body up in his arms and holds her close, lowering his head and sobbing. Kristine tears up as she watches him upset, practically yelling at him to get up.

He somehow managed to leave her there, punching a tree stump beside him. The delicate skin on his knuckles burst open as blood formed before rising, grabbing Kristine's hand and leaving. They then stumble upon another female teen with a slit throat. Her body was also pale and cold to the touch. Her eyes were closed but the way her body sat left a gut wrenching feeling inside Kristine's stomach. The sight made her stomach churn, but she managed to keep her composure.

"Shit. She's dead. She's dead!" Kristine sobs.

[reddesertcolbs]

balcony dream // colby brock

this is smut, so 18+.

requested: yes 

summary: you and colby are chilling on his balcony, which leads to one of your fantasies coming true. 

word count: 3.5k words. 

warnings: swearing, fingering, sexual intercourse, slight praise kink.

my writing

//

without a doubt, balconies are one of your favourite places to hang out, especially colby’s. 

the mornings when you wake up before him, almost every day, you like to hop out of the bed quietly, careful not to wake the sleeping man to the right of you, and stalk down to the kitchen. you make yourself a cup of coffee or tea, depending on the mood you’re in before climbing the stairs again, back into colby’s room and towards the door, opening it wide and stepping out. a smile is on your face, when the warmth of the morning sun touches your skin, warming it instantly, and the sound of the birds singing a beautiful song rings in your ears. 

without a second thought, one of your favourite moments is spending time with colby, your gorgeous boyfriend, on the balcony at night time. normally he is typing away on his laptop or phone, answering work emails or editing, whilst you sit beside him reading a book, scrolling through your phone or doing whatever your heart feels like doing at that moment. you especially love it when the sun has set, the moon sitting in the sky glowing a beautiful milky white colour and the stars twinkle above the two of you. 

so here you are, with your legs perched on top colby’s lap, shivering under his touch when the pads of his fingers ghost along your bare shins, and from the slight breeze from the brisk night air. a book is sitting in your lap, your eyes skimming the page and occasionally glancing up from the paperback to see what colby was doing, grinning to see him looking at himself through his phone camera checking out his fresh hair colour, purple. the small light that’s planted on the wall above colby’s head makes the purple strands stand out even more, and you can’t stop your mouth from watering at the sight.

watching him with an amused grin, you can’t help but chuckle quietly when the man pouts his lips, posing for a snapchat picture before flicking your gaze back down to the book, trying to make it less obvious that you were studying him. 

your eyes dance across the pages, lip tucked between your teeth in concentration, taking in every emotion that the character is portraying, before flipping the page over, repeating the action.

“have i ever told you how incredibly sexy you look when you’re nose deep into a book?” colby’s voice is low, observing the way the corner of your lips tug upwards in a gentle smile, cheeks flushing slightly at his words. your eyes leave the page, lifting up to meet the icy blue eyes of your handsome boyfriend. 

“maybe a couple of times.” you shrug with a smirk, watching his hand that’s moving along your leg, glide up to your thigh and stopping, giving it a gentle squeeze. he stretches his right hand forward, hand meeting the side of your face and cupping your cheek gently. his thumb glides along the smoothness of your bottom lip, eyes darkening slightly as his eyes never leave his thumb. 

closing the book slowly, not before placing your bookmark into the middle of the book, you lean down and place it onto the floor, sitting back up to give the man in front of you your full attention. 

“come sit on my lap, wanna hold you.” he mumbles, dancing his fingers across your thigh, drawing shapes and random patterns into the softness of your skin, the feeling making your release a shaky breath through your mouth against the pad of his thumb, making colby smirk because he can see the visible effect he has on your mind and body.

immediately you raise, crawling over to him and straddling his hips with your knees sitting on either side. his hands circle your waist, tugging you closer to him to make your chests touch. your body feels like it’s on fire from the sudden touch of colby’s bare chest against your vest top, even though the coolness of the air blows over your skin. 

looping your hands around his neck, you can’t stop your fingers from playing with the brown locks that are sitting on the nape of his neck, tugging softly. one of his hands moves from your waist, up to your cheek again, pulling your face towards him so your lips are inches away from his. 

“wanna make you feel good.” he mutters, hot breath clouding your face, as his eyes glide across your face, studying your features with loving eyes. 

“out here?” you inquire, voice dropping to a whisper out of lust and because it was late, pitch black sky with only the moon beating down brightly against your skin, making your features glow beautifully. 

“out here.” he nods, his thumb returning to its position onto your bottom lip, swiping over softly, making you part your lips and wrapping them around the tip with a hum, pulling away with a quiet pop and blown out pupils, when the man lets out a throaty groan from his chest. 

“okay.” you whisper breathlessly. having sex with colby on his balcony has always been one of your fantasies, and the thought of it actually happening makes your head spin, and wetness to spread in your knickers immediately. 

he wastes no time, bringing his lips to connect with yours, slotting them together in a lustful kiss, soft hums in content erupting from the back of colby’s throat when he can taste the sweetness of your watermelon lip balm. your left hand rests on the side of his neck, whilst the other busies itself into his new purple locks, fingernails scratching his scalp gently as you begin to move your hips against his, emitting a breathless sigh from you and him at the same time. 

the feeling of his tongue prodding at your bottom lip causes your lips to open, his tongue meeting yours within a heartbeat. they rub together messily, sounds of wet kisses flooding the balcony and the slight squeak of the outside sofa that the two of you are sitting on, but you couldn’t give two shits as he releases his mouth from yours, with a pant. 

one hand releases itself from your waist, to your neck, tilting it sideways, so he can trail his wet lips down past your jaw to the column of your throat, leaving open mouth kisses all across it before sucking hot red hickies next to your sweet spot, causing you to whimper. the man smirks against your neck, continuing his attack on it as he brings his other hand to palm your breast, releasing a deep groan at the feeling of your braless chest and hardened nipple, giving it a gentle squeeze. 

“god, colbs.” you whine, waves of pleasure rushing south and straight to your core as you feel your swollen clit rub against his now rock solid cock. “please fuck me, can’t wait any longer, so wet for you.” 

colby bites back a moan at your words, and his hands fly down to your waist, encouraging you to stand up for a moment, in which you oblige straight away. you watch him with knitted brows, confused as to why you’re now standing, but a warm smile is plastered onto your face when the man glances up at you with a benevolent grin. 

“can i take these off, baby?” he asks, hands reaching forward to play with the waistband of your shorts, fingers dancing on the inside of them. you nod with a quick yes, and a loud gasp is released when he tugs your shorts and knickers down your legs forcefully, them pooling at your feet. the sudden breeze of the wind rushes past your core, causing you to whimper. 

releasing his hands off your hips, colby raises his own, pulling his shorts and boxers over the swell of his bum and down his thighs, letting them pool at his feet as his rock hard cock slaps against his stomach. your eyes are trained on his red tip, leaking with a bead of precum from the grinding of your hips, and you can’t stop yourself from biting your lower lip in anticipation. 

reaching forward, colby grips your hips, tugging you back onto his lap and connecting his lips back onto yours hungrily, teeth clashing in the process but you didn’t care. soft whines are released from your precious mouth, when colby reaches down, middle finger running between your soaking wet folds, teasing your entrance with the pad of his digit, before bringing it up to your clit, collecting your wetness along the way and circling your clit harshly, causing your hips to jolt forward. 

“shit,” you pant, pulling away from his lips briefly to catch your breath and to focus on his middle finger that is rubbing fast circles into your swollen bud. “fuck, feel so good and you’re not even fucking me yet.” 

colby chuckles softly at your words, before he groans slightly when he feels some of your slickness fall from your hole, onto his shaft from his fingers rubbing patterns into your clit. within a second, your mouth is back onto his with a whimper as the knot in your stomach is building, hands clawing his shoulders to help you keep up right as your body starts to tense. 

“so close,” you breath against his lips, pulling away to rest your forehead against his chin as he plants a soft kiss onto it, dipping his fingers down and slipping his middle finger into your entrance with ease, causing you to cry out as his finger immediately curls up against your spongy wall, hitting your gspot deliciously every time. “holy shit.” 

“gonna cum all over my fingers, pretty?” he teases, thrusting his middle finger into you deeply before adding his ring finger, the added stimulation making your head fall back and eyes roll into the back of your head with a loud groan, not having a care in the world right now that someone could hear or see you both. you nod your head up and down frantically, the pleasure making it unbearable for you to verbal respond to him, making the man grin in satisfaction as he watches you come undone because of his fingers. “you have no idea how fucking beautiful you look right now.” 

colby's right. the moon shining over your body makes you look even more gorgeous than you already are, because it helps to enhance your features, causing you to glow beautifully and he can’t help but feel his heart burst with pride that you’re his. 

“that’s it, that’s my girl.” he praises, feeling your smooth warm walls start to clench around his two digits, keeping his deep and steady rhythm, as you let out pants and whines. “cum for me, baby.” 

your orgasm hits you like a brick, your walls pulsating quickly around his fingers as he continues to thrust them in and out, helping you ride out our high and you cling onto him for dear life as your body tenses and shakes. you cry out his name loud, as his hand wraps around your body tightly to keep you upright and to stop you from falling back, as the sound of your slickness and your deep heavy breaths fills both of your ears. 

eventually, colby removes his fingers from inside of you with a grin, bringing them up to his lips and sucking your release off them with a moan, loving the way you taste. 

“taste so fucking sweet,” he groans, releasing his fingers from inside his mouth to grip his cock, which is throbbing from the lack of stimulation that he’s had, but he could care less because he gets off from making you feel good. “i could taste you all day, princess.” 

whimpering loudly at his words, you lean forward to press a kiss to his swollen lips from him biting his lip, and moan when you taste your release on his lips. with a grin, he parts his lips, tongue hitting yours and rubbing against each other frantically, as he runs his leaking tip through your wetness, causing your hips to stutter from sensitivity. 

“gonna make you feel so good, baby girl,” he mumbles against your lips, one hand leaving your hips to rest onto the base of your neck, as the other teases your entrance with the tip of his cock, making you whine pathetically. “the whole neighbourhood is going to know my name by the end of it.” 

“wait, baby,” you whisper quickly before he could have the chance to push his tip through your warm entrance. your words nearly cause the man to gain whiplash with how quick he whips his head up to look at you, features laced with concern. pressing a barely there kiss to his lips, you mumble out, “i want you to fuck me against the railing.” 

he releases a low groan from your vulgar words and presses a hard kiss to your mouth, before lifting you up off his lap and standing up in the process, before spinning you around and bending you over so your forearms are resting against the cold metal railing. your eyes close at the feeling of his hard cock pressing against the flesh of your bottom, and the feeling of his large hands ghosting the skin by your hips, before moving down to cup your bum with a squeeze, with his other hand wraps around his length, pumping it a couple of times with shaky breaths. 

spreading your cheeks open, he runs the tip of his swollen cock through your wetness, before sinking into your entrance with a sigh, a loud gasp followed by a moan from you. he moves his hips forward, stopping when he can no longer see any of his length on display before retracting his hips and thrusting back into quickly, making you cry out. 

“colby, yes!” you whimper, your hands gripping tightly onto the white railing, whilst colby’s hips snap back and forth against yours fast, skin colliding together ringing through both of your ears. one of his hands leaves your hips to trail underneath your shirt, hand cupping your breast immediately and pinching your nipple between his thumb and pointer finger, causing your back to arch. 

“god angel,” he grunts, your walls wrapping around his cock dreamily, making his vision blur slightly. his hand that’s resting on your waist digs into your soft skin, as he thrusts his hips deep into you. “your pussy was made for me.” 

“fuck, colby. you feel so good, don’t stop, fuck baby.” you beg, one hand leaving the railing to grip his arm that’s placed on your waist, clawing the skin on his forearm as the tip of his cock hits the spot that makes you see stars every time, earning a loud moan to fall past your lips. 

“yes, yes, yes, fuck!” you cry, his cock rubbing against warm velvet walls enchantedly, and you can feel the coil in your stomach tighten. colby is fully aware of this, knowing how your body reacts to him and the way your walls tighten around him, and his hand leaves your breast, and moves down to swirl fast and harsh circles into your swollen clit. within an instant, your head tips back and animalistic moans fall freely past your lips, not giving a care in the world who can see or hear you both right now. all you can think about is the waves a pleaure that are racking through your body and colby’s cock. “colby, shit need to cum so badly.” 

“cum for me pretty, don’t hold back.” his hand leaves your waist to loop around your shoulders, pulling you up so your back is resting against his sweaty chest. the new position makes you cry out louder as it helps colby bury his cock even deeper inside you, and you’re pretty sure you can feel him in your stomach. his lips attach to the side of your neck, leaving wet kisses all over it with throaty groans. “so fucking beautiful, my girl aren’t you.” 

you nod pathetically in response, your pussy clenching around his cock signalling that the knot in your stomach is about to snap any moment. your whole body feels like it’s on fire, as he pounds into with so much force, your breasts bounce up and down every time is hips collide with yours.

“gonna cum, holy shit.” you choked out, eyes squeezing shut tightly and your hands grip colby’s lower back, leaving crescent shaped moons into his fleshy skin. colby’s finger against your clit speeds up, circles becoming sloppy but still harsh, as he snaps his hips into you with crossed brows of pleasure, loving the way that your body is reacting to his touch and cock. 

“fuck, cum for me baby, i know you want to.” he coos into your ear, feeling you clamp around him at his words. 

“colby. colbs, fuck!” his words cause your orgasm to hit you like a wave, his hips slapping against yours as your body trembles uncontrollably, shocks of pleasure taking over it as you release all over his cock with loud whimpers. your toes curl and your stomach tightens as the rhythm of his hips doesn’t slow down, fucking you through your orgasm and catching his with grunts. 

“fuck, you’re gonna make me cum so hard.” he purrs into your ear, mouth hanging open wide and the feeling of your release pooling over his cock eggs him on, slamming his hips into you repeatedly. overstimulation from your two orgasms starts to kick in, as your hands cling onto colby’s body the best you can with breathless whimpers, and your core tightens around his shaft, making the man see stars.

“that’s it, keep doing that. good girl, my good girl.” his hips stutter, his own high nearing him as his stomach starts to tense when you clench around him again, helping him reach his high. with a low grunt, his hips stop, pressing his hips into your bottom deeply when his cock twitches, and his load spills into you in white ribbons. he holds you tight against his body, your shaky breaths piercing his ears as you try to regain your breathing, hands still holding onto him tightly as your eyes close, head falling back onto his shoulder. 

after a couple of minutes of staggered breathing, colby retracts his hips, cock slipping out of you with ease from both of your releases mixed together, spilling out of your hole once he has released himself. the feeling of both of your releases dribbling down your thighs and the lack of contact from colby’s cock makes you whine, causing the man to chuckle lightly. 

he spins you around, holding your hot and clammy body against his chest when he feels your legs tremble, causing him to pull the two of you to sit down onto the chair again, him pulling you onto his lap with a warm smile. 

“you okay, love?” he whispers, lips planted soft and gentle kisses to your forehead as you wrap your tired arms around his neck. 

“yeah, i’m okay.” you smile, lifting your head up to look at him and pressing your lips against his for a loving kiss, slow and lazy. one of his hands glides across your back, whilst the other holds your thigh, giving it a soft squeeze. 

“come on, let’s go for a shower then we can get in bed and cuddle.” he says, pulling his lips away from yours to mutter against them. with a nod, you press one last kiss to his pink lips, before standing up, his hands wrapping around your waist as soon as he is standing too, to hold you close to him so you don’t fall. 

he guides you over to the shower, turning it on and waiting a couple of minutes for it to warm up before pulling the two of you into it. the warmth of the shower relaxes you further, making you shut your eyes as colby works his fingers through your hair, trying his best to wash it for you, since it’s clear to him your energy is very low. 

“i love you so much.” he mumbles, tugging you close to him by your hips as you rest your chin onto his wet chest, eyes glancing up at him as he looks down at you, pupils filled with love and awe, as water droplets cascade down his face making him look so handsome, your heart squeezes with adoration.

“i love you so much, more. you have no idea.” you respond with a lazy grin, standing on your tiptoes to slot your lips with his for a quick kiss, before spinning the two of you around so he is now standing under the stream of water again. “now hurry and shower so we can cuddle.”

you watch as he tips his head back, water dripping over his toned body before his head lifts again, his hands moving up to his face to rub some of the water that is clouding his vision with a smirk.

“the whole neighbourhood is definitely going to know my name after that.” he chuckles, cocky grin sporting his face as your face warms, eyes rolling playfully at him. 

“shut it.” you giggle, hands smoothing over the slickness of his body from the water droplets, as he cranes his head forward, pressing a quick kiss to yours with a hum in satisfaction when you pucker yours against his too. “besides, it’s not the neighbourhood who will hate us the most, it’ll be the boys downstairs when they hear us fucking on the balcony more often.” 

“yeah, we’re definitely fucking out there again, baby. not up for discussion.” he grins when you nod your head quickly in agreement, placing one last kiss to your soft lips before continuing to wash his body, with the help from you. 

request here

[maria-scribbles]

loyalty’s all i got | part two

three years ago, you had it all: great friends, good grades, and an almost perfect relationship with your boyfriend, jj. it all came crashing down when your mom relocated your family to california for work and you were forced to trade the outer banks for malibu, leaving your broken heart behind in the place you were just starting to think of as home. now you're back in town for college and to pick up the pieces, hoping to make things right again with your friends and the boy you never stopped loving.

word count: 8.6k+

ship: jj maybank x female!reader, pogue friendship

warnings n stuff: angst angst angst all around (with a happy ending tho!!), the reader being a v. sad girl, mentions of anxiety/depression, failed long distance relationship, drifting apart, self-inflicted loneliness/isolation, the classic trope of 'they broke up but they're still in love with each other' that gives me feels, swearing (it's not my writing unless someone says 'fuck' at least once), reconciliation/mended relationships, traditional cheesy rom-com rain scene 'cause i'm a Dramatic Hoe™

a/n: and here's the second and final part of this looooong two-shot! thank you all so much for reading and i hope you enjoy the finale even though i low key kind of hate it 🙃. fun fact: surfrider beach is a real place in malibu known for its great waves :) also i apologize for how long this took to post, i dropped my laptop and the screen broke so i had to wait for it to get fixed lmao. unbetaed as usual, any mistakes are my b. 

~masterlist~

part two: like a ghost that no one knew

When you said goodbye to your friends three years ago, you should've known things would never be the same again. You were sixteen, still so young and naïve and full of an almost childlike hope that kept you from seeing the obvious: life wasn't fair. Sometimes, you could be holding all the right cards and still lose the game.

It should've been easy. You had a video chat schedule already figured out, promises of daily texts and Snapchats, a boyfriend willing -enthusiastically willing, in fact- to go long distance and make it work no matter what 'cause you both agreed that what you had was something worth fighting for. You and your friends had weathered many storms together, what was one more? It could've been easy but you underestimated just how cruel California would be.

You traded one coast for the other and watched the sun set over the Pacific alone when you would've given anything to watch it rise over the Atlantic with your friends. It hurt to surf solo but you did it anyway, even though it felt like a damn sucker punch each time you caught yourself scanning the sand for JJ and his proud smile when you successfully caught bigger and bigger waves at Surfrider Beach. 

Long distance was hard. You had days where all you wanted to do was lay on your bed for hours, safely curled up in his arms as he ran his fingers through your hair but you had to settle for his voice over the phone and one of his shirts from your closet instead. You missed everything about him: his pretty eyes that looked like the clearest ocean, the cheeky grin he'd send your way after making a stupid joke that had you affectionately rolling your eyes in exasperation, that adorable flush that spread across his face without fail each and every time you said you loved him. You longed for his constant affection; the way he always wanted to keep you close somehow, his arm around your shoulders, hand in your back pocket, or fingers entwined with yours; how he could never go a day without kissing you. Being apart was nothing short of torture.

"I fucking miss you." He said late one night during a rare FaceTime session -his phone was a piece of shit so he had to 'borrow' John B's whenever he could- and you smiled despite the knife twisting itself deeper and deeper into your heart as you played with the fraying sleeve of his old sweatshirt you wore. 

"I fucking miss you more, J." You whispered back, giggling quietly when he scrunched up his nose in playful skepticism. 

"Yeah, I don't think so, babe. There's no way." 

"Yes, way!"

Although it hurt like hell, you imagined being tangled up with him in the hammock hanging in the Chateau's yard under the North Carolina sky -the light from the moon would turn his blond hair a pale silver as he grinned down at you and cupped your cheek in his hand, closing that final distance between you for a kiss that'd fuel the fire racing through your veins- and you let that fleeting happiness carry you through the night, long after you said goodbye. You fell asleep with your phone in your hand, unaware that your mother had been listening from the other side of your closed door.

You'd been distant from her and your dad in the months since the move, obviously going out of your way to avoid them both by spending all your spare time surfing at the beach, coming home well past sunset and heading straight to your room without a word. They'd taught you forgiveness wasn't something to be given willingly -it had to be earned- and since neither of them had done anything worthy to deserve an absolution, you simply pretended they didn't exist and let yourself stew in your justified anger.

Until the morning after your video date with JJ, they'd wisely given you your space so you were pretty blind sighted to find them both waiting for you at the dining room table, one of your dad's famous cinnamon rolls on a plate set in front of your usual chair. You paused in the middle of tying one of your boyfriend's worn bandanas in your hair before abruptly continuing toward the front door, acting like you didn't see the hopeful looks on their faces that made guilt slowly start to burrow its way into your chest. 

"Y/N, wait," Your dad sprung from his seat and reached his hand out toward your elbow, his face falling when you instantly pulled back and crossed your arms. "Please, let's just talk for a second."

"I'm gonna be late for the bus," You lied and tried for the door again, sighing in frustration when he blocked your path and ushered you toward the table where your mom was sitting, biting her thumbnail. The guilt burrowed deeper: you thought she kicked that habit years ago but there she was, chewing her nail to shreds and it was all because of you (the empty satisfaction you felt knowing you were the cause of her stress made you hate yourself just a little more.).

"Jellybean, don't worry about that. I'll drive you." 

You bristled at the old nickname but sat in the chair your dad pulled out for you anyway. The smell of the cinnamon roll he pushed your way made your mouth water but you refused to eat and kept your eyes down as you played with the stack of bracelets adorning your wrist. "You wanted to talk?" You asked, deciding to just rip the band-aid off all at once 'cause knowing your mom when she was anxious and your dad being allergic to any type of confrontation, you'd have sat there all day until one of them worked up the courage to speak.

"Talk, right." Bill said with a nervous chuckle, shaking his head as he took a seat and swiped his own cinnamon roll from the pan in the middle of the table. "Uh, how are you?"

"Are you serious right now?" You asked incredulously, looking up from your lap with a raised eyebrow. "All this for 'how are you?'" 

"How would we know?" Your mom finally spoke up as she pulled her ruined nail from her mouth, only to start instantly drumming her fingers on the table. "You're always holed up in your room or at the beach, Y/N. You never talk to us anymore."

You rolled your eyes before fixing her with a deadpan stare. "Hmm, I wonder why."

"Honey, you know I'm sorry-"

"Don't, okay? Just don't." You swallowed thickly and dumped the cinnamon roll back into the pan, blinking away the awful burning pressure building behind your eyes. "I can't listen to some half-assed apology that you don't mean!"

"Y/N, we are sorry. Everything's gonna get better, just give it time." Your dad's reply was muffled by a mouthful of pastry and any other time, you'd usually be laughing at his chipmunk cheeks but instead you just stared back down at your hands again, lip quivering as you tried and failed to hold yourself together. You would not cry. You would not cry. You would not-

"Please, honey." Your mom tentatively reached out one hand like she was approaching a wounded animal, her voice so soft you could barely hear it above the rush of blood in your ears. "It hurts us to see you like this-"

Oh, fuck this shit.

"You're hurt?! Are you kidding me?" Your chair scraped along the tile as you rocketed to your feet, vision blurring when the dam finally broke. "You promised we wouldn't move again until after I graduated and you broke that promise. I let myself make friends for once in my goddamn life -I fucking fell in love, Mom! I fell in love with the most amazing boy who, by some miracle loves me, too despite me being a...a complete loser!" You were rambling now but you couldn't find it in yourself to care about or stop the words flying from your mouth. 

"God, I was happy -so, so disgustingly happy it kind of scared me, okay?" You laughed bitterly and roughly wiped the tears from your cheeks, only to have more immediately take their place. "And you didn't even stop to think before you took it all away from me! So don't even talk to me about being hurt 'cause you have no fucking idea!"

Your dad was frozen, eyes the same color as your own blown impossibly wide in the middle of another bite of cinnamon roll while your mom, two tears streaking perfect twin tracks down her cheeks, looked at you like you'd just told her the world was ending -to her, it just might've been but to you, it already had. Neither of them said another word as you snatched your backpack off the couch and stormed from the house, slamming the door behind you.

Halfway to the bus stop, you decided school just wasn't in the cards that day and doubled back, hiding behind the shed in your backyard until your tears had run dry and both of your parents left -Rebekah to the hospital, Bill to wherever he went while you were in class- before heading inside to change into your rash vest and grab your board. Despite it being early Friday morning, Surfrider Beach was full of life and you welcomed the hustle and bustle as you turned off your phone and buried it at the bottom of your bag, leaving your problems behind on the sand. 

You spent the whole day at the beach, blissfully alone and free to do what you wanted, until the sun dipped low in the sky and you were too exhausted to even think about anything but dragging yourself home so you could pass the fuck out. You caught one final wave before heading back to shore, waving goodbye to the group of other kids you'd surfed with all day (the one thing you loved about California: everyone was so chill) and trudged through the sand toward your things where, just as you expected, your sister sat on your towel, clad in a baggy UCLA long-sleeve with her phone in hand. 

"Bitch, you killed it out there!" She looked up as you dropped your board to the ground and sat down heavily beside her, slipping an old Kildare County High School sweatshirt -the first one you ever 'borrowed' from your boyfriend, much to his delight- over your head. "I mean, look at you go!"

You leaned closer to watch the video she took, the barest hint of a smile on your face when you watched yourself perform a near perfect cutback on the screen. "That's 'cause I had the best teacher." 

Daisy tagged you and posted it to Instagram before you could protest, then tossed the phone back into her bag and turned to you with a forced cheerfulness that kind of made you want to smack her. "So..."

"Mom and Dad sent you to clean up their mess." You finished quietly, tucking your knees to your chest and wrapping your arms around them as your sister sighed dramatically and offered a sympathetic wince. 

"As always." She copied your position and you both stared out at the sun sinking over the water, its fading rays turning the sky brilliant shades of orange and pink. It was typical of your parents to send Daisy after you when you were upset -after all, you'd both been each other's only friend for over half your lives- and normally, you'd be glad to see your sister's friendly face instead of your mom's or dad's. That evening, though? All you felt was...disappointment.

"Guess they really don't give a shit about me." You mumbled under your breath, half-hoping Daisy didn't hear you but from the way she snapped her head in your direction, you didn't get your wish.

"Y/N, that's not it. They're just..."

"Just what? Pretending that they didn't stab me in the back? Acting like everything's all hunky-dory and they actually cared about my feelings?" 

You hastily wiped at your face when your sister silently looped an arm around your shoulders and tucked you against her side, her fingers running soothingly through the ends of your damp hair as you vented all of your frustrations -everything you'd kept locked deep inside your heart- until your voice was hoarse and the sun had long disappeared from the horizon and you had no tears left to cry.

"You have no idea what it's like, being so lonely it hurts to breathe. It hurts knowing Mom and Dad have each other and you have Daniel and I'm alone all the time." You lifted your head from her shoulder and rubbed your red eyes with your sleeve. "Worst part is, they just keep acting like I'll wake up one day and magically be okay and everything'll be all sunshine and rainbows again." 

"First off, I wanna say that I'm sorry for not making more time for you. I knew you were struggling and I'm a terrible big sister for not being here for you like I should have," You squeezed Daisy's other hand in thanks as she tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear, her voice soft and steady like the waves crashing against the shore. "Second, I definitely don't think Mom and Dad are handling this the way they should, but I think they're trying in the only way they know how. That should count for something, right?"

You sighed and tugged the sleeves of your sweatshirt over your hands. "I guess, but they haven't even tried to see where I'm coming from and they don't get that I'm not the only one they hurt. If I have to hear one more half-assed apology, I'm gonna lose my shit. Again."

"I'm not saying you have to forgive them right away 'cause I sure as hell wouldn't until they say they're sorry and mean it. But..." She said, pulling you to your feet and shaking the sand from the towel you were sitting on, "you shouldn't keep shutting them out, okay? It's not healthy."

You tucked your board under your arm as Daisy grabbed your bag and swung it onto her shoulder before you both started walking toward the parking lot. "What if I'm never ready to forgive them?"

"That's a question I don't have the answer to." She said with a shrug. "You've gotta figure that one out for yourself."

So you followed your sister's advice. You were civil and gradually, your relationship with your parents improved until you could stand to be in the same room as them and even carry on a short conversation, even though you knew you'd probably never be able to fully trust them again. You caught them exchanging glances you could only describe as wounded when you often turned down their invitations to go to the movies or get ice cream or other things you used to love doing when you were younger but for the most part, they took it in stride and you were grateful for their little efforts. Forgiveness wasn't in the cards quite yet but with each passing day, you felt the icy wall around your heart slowly start to melt away.

But every time you thought you were taking one step forward, life pushed you two steps back. Just when you were getting things back on track with your family, the train went flying off the rails when it came to your friends and it was all your fault.

It wasn't like you didn't try -God, did you try- to keep yourself from falling back into old habits but Malibu just had a way of bringing out the absolute worst in you. Your old self, the girl who kept to herself and pushed everyone away, someone you thought you buried in the deepest grave, slowly came back from the dead with a vengeance little by little, so subtly you didn't realize what was happening until it was too late. 

One missed phone call turned into two, texts went unanswered for days or not at all, FaceTime sessions happened less and less. The last video chat had been with Kiara and it ended terribly, after you blew up at her for mending her friendship with Sarah Cameron in the near two years since you'd been gone, spitting words you couldn't quite remember -something along the lines of 'didn't take you too long to replace me, huh' and calling the blonde girl a 'heinous bitch'- but knew you regretted with everything you had and hanging up before she had a chance to explain. You couldn't even recall the last time you talked to Pope or John B aside from the occasional Snapchat and your daily calls with JJ had turned to once a week, if you were lucky.

He was trying, you could tell, and so were you but the deck was stacked against you and you were never very good at cards, anyway. It hurt to try, it hurt not to try, everything just hurt. Nearly two years apart had done their damage and coupled with your debilitating fear of being forgotten that clawed at your chest like a rabid dog, your relationship was on unstable ground and for the first time in almost four years, you were thinking about the end. It wasn't like you didn't love him anymore (holy shit, were you still completely head over heels in love). In fact, you loved him so much you realized that he could do so, so much better than you and the thought rested heavy and bittersweet on your mind, lurking in the shadows until you were ready to bring it to light.

It happened on New Year's Eve. Alone in your room, your hands shook as you answered JJ's call at midnight, his voice tired and a little hoarse from celebrating the new year three hours earlier on the opposite coast and you nearly started crying right then and there when you replied with a shaky "I think we need to talk."

"Babe, what's wrong?"

You took a deep breath and said quietly, "Everything."

"Talk to me." The pure concern in those three words nearly convinced you to call it off, to tell him to forget you said anything and that you were fine, everything was just fine but deep down, you knew you couldn't.

"I've been thinking about us and I...I just think that you deserve better than me. Someone who can actually be there for you when you need her and hold you when your dad's an asshole and see you every day. Someone who can laugh at your silly jokes and share a joint with you and clean you up when you get into fights defending your friends-"

"Babe, what are you talking about? That girl is you."

"Maybe I was but I'm not anymore and I don't think I have been since I left. I just can't be the girl you want, I can't be the girl you deserve, J -I'm a total fucking mess and you can do so, so much better than me."

"Y/N."

You didn't know you were crying until you heard the broken way he breathed your name and salt water dripped from your chin onto the bracelet around your wrist. 

"...are you breaking up with me?" His voice was impossibly small, the quietest you'd ever heard it and the exact moment your battered heart shattered into pieces was when you realized he didn't even put up a fight. 

"I think so." The words tore through you like a gunshot as you cried, curling into yourself on the bed in an effort to ward off the worst pain you'd ever felt in your life and you wondered if it was possible to die from a wound that wasn't even physical. 

He was quiet for a long time, so long you thought he hung up without you noticing through your tears, until he sniffed on the other end of the line.

"Guess we had a pretty good run, huh?" He asked with a watery chuckle and you found yourself giving a tiny, shuddering giggle in response -God, even when you were breaking his heart he still managed to make you laugh.

"The best, baby." The pet name slipped out like second nature and you winced, hastily trying to cover your mistake with an awkward cough but from the sharp breath you heard him take, he'd heard it anyway.

("I'm sorry," you said, and it stood as an apology for more than just your slip-up.)

"I love you, Y/N. Probably always will."

"I'll never stop loving you, JJ. That's a promise."

You let yourself believe him as you laid there bleeding from a gash you couldn't see, a wound you knew would never heal, and you hoped he let himself believe you, too, even when you ended the call without another word and threw your phone away from you, not bothering to see where it landed. The sound of your heavy, broken sobs filled the room and you didn't even mind when your mom, who you knew had been listening from the other side of your closed door like always, barged in and took you into her arms, stroking your hair as you cried into her lap.

If you were supposed to avoid getting hurt by leaving first, why did it feel like everything in you was broken? If you were making the right choice, why did it feel so wrong? You didn't have the answers and no matter how hard you searched, you knew you'd ever find them.  

So you tried to stay busy. You joined the surf club at school, got a part-time job at the local aquarium, did anything you could to distract yourself from the hurt and the guilt and the way getting out of bed every morning was the hardest thing to do. Surf club introduced you to Mackenzie, the one girl who was more ostracized at school -an even richer version of the kook academy you hated -than you, her for being freakishly tall and you for your East Coast attitude, and the two of you became fast, if reluctant friends. Mack didn't try to stitch the gaping hole in your heart caused by your absent friends but she numbed the pain just enough to make it bearable and you were grateful for her calm, steady presence at your side, even as you both tried to keep each other at arm's length.  

Later, you found out she was just like you, friendless and awkward with no self-esteem and a tendency to push people away, and that just cemented your friendship through the summer and your final year of high school.

Mack told you all about her life, growing up with no siblings, having height that she never learned to deal with, and a debilitating social anxiety that made making friends near impossible, and in turn you told her about how you hopped from town to town on your mother's whims, the wonderful friends you let slip away, and the beautiful boyfriend you loved enough to let go, and you both cried together for the lives you could've led.

"You two looked so happy," She said during the first sleepover you hosted as she held one of the many picture frames littering your dresser, her lips turned upwards in a small smile.

You gently took the frame from her hands and ran your fingers over the grinning face of your ex-boyfriend, his arms wrapped around your shoulders as your painted lips planted a deep red kiss on his cheek, and the wave of longing washing over you was almost strong enough to bring you to your knees. "It was the happiest I've ever been."

"Do you miss him?"

"So much it hurts."

i miss you.

i'm so sorry.

i still love you.

You'd typed and erased those texts every day but never mustered the courage to hit send and you couldn't decide if that was a blessing in disguise or the worst possible curse. Of course you still loved JJ: you promised you would and even if you didn't, you couldn't stop if you tried. He was your first love, the boy you so willingly gave your whole heart and then some; you still kept his ring on your thumb -the one he gave you at the airport the day you left- and his bracelet around your wrist, his bandanas in your hair and his face in your dreams and you knew you always would.

Before you could blink, your eighteenth birthday flew by and graduation was upon you.

You thought the second you were done with high school you'd be gone, heading straight back to the Outer Banks and the life you left behind but you found yourself stalling on sending in an application to UNC -Chapel Hill until you missed the deadline for the fall semester. On the outside, you made up a semi-legit excuse about getting your basic courses done at a community college to save money but deep down you really knew why you procrastinated: you were terrified to go back. Ever since your break up with JJ, you hadn't spoken to him or any of your old friends other than the obligatory birthday wishes on Facebook and you wondered if the damage you'd done over the years was too much to come back from, even as you tried to work up the courage to find out for sure.

Another year passed: in between earning college credits, you and Daisy took a sister's trip to Disneyland, Mack asked you to tag along on a jaunt up the coast to San Francisco to see Alcatraz, your parents celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary (your gift was long-overdue forgiveness and they said it was the greatest thing you possibly could've given them). When the time came, you and Mack both sent out your applications to UNC -you for biology, her for chemistry- and the myriad of emotions you felt when you got in was nothing short of dizzying. The old you was terrified, screaming at you to rip up the letter and join your sister at UCLA instead of opening old wounds but the hopeful you, the girl who lived without fear, the girl who fell in love and let herself be loved, screamed louder.

And so you killed the old you once again, burying her even deeper than the last time in a locked chest and throwing the key as far as you could out into the Pacific where you knew you'd never find it. You clutched your acceptance letter close to your chest and took a step east, away from California and toward the place where your broken heart still rested, scattered in pieces across the sand.

Settling in at UNC was surprisingly easy. You and Mack already clicked pretty well as friends so making the transition to roommates was natural and, dare you say it, even a little fun and the two of you quickly fell into a comfortable routine in your tiny apartment off campus in Chapel Hill. Comfortable and yet...that happiness you once felt all those years ago was missing from your life and you found yourself just as restless as you were in Malibu. While you knew exactly what you needed to do, that fear kept rearing its ugly head in the back of your mind, poisoning your thoughts: what if they wouldn't be happy to see you, what if they forgot about you, what if they hated you? What if he hated you?

It was terrifying, picturing yourself turning up at the Chateau with a hopeful smile only to have the door slammed right in your face. Deep down, you knew they'd never do that to you no matter how badly you'd hurt them but when you'd spent your whole life expecting the worst, taking a leap of faith wasn't an easy feat -something Mack just couldn't wrap her head around.

"I don't get it."

You glanced up from where you were lounging on your bed, flipping through your biology notes in preparation for your lab exam the next morning and shot your roommate a confused look. "Get what?”

Mack sat at your desk, her own notebooks lying ignored as she spun the chair around to face you, arms crossed. "Why you haven't hopped on that ferry to go get your man yet!"

You froze for a moment too long before offering a half-hearted shrug as you fiddled with the beads at the end of your bracelet. "It's not that easy. He probably wants nothing to do with me and I don't blame him."

"How do you know? You haven't talked to JJ in over a year, right?" At your tight nod, she continued, "What if he's just like you-"

"Depressed?"

Mack fixed you with a flat, unamused look. "Still in love, dumbass."

You scoffed and propped your chin in your hand as you glanced back down at your study guide, trying not to latch onto that little thought -hope and pain all rolled into one- that sparked to life at her words. He'd said he would probably always love you that New Year's Eve and back then you'd let yourself believe him but now, you weren't so sure. "Yeah, right. No way he's still...still in love with me after I broke his heart."

"Maybe he is, maybe he isn't," Your roommate said with a shrug, spinning around on the chair to grab her things. "You'll never know if you don't get over there, track his fine ass down, and talk to him."

You stared down at your notes without actually seeing anything, the slanted letters of your handwriting blurring before your eyes as the other girl flipped her chemistry book closed and stood, shooting you an warm smile that you didn't see. 

"Listen, Y/N, you're my best friend and I want to see you happy more than anything but I can't take that jump for you. Yeah, it's scary and nerve wracking and you might end up hurt worse than before, so what? That's just...life."

Mack left after that, crossing the apartment to her room so she could get ready for a date with a girl from her psych class, leaving you alone with tears on your face and a million thoughts in your head, all of them terrifying and exciting and oh so loud.

She was right, of course -Mack always knew the right thing to say- and as you stared down at the bracelets on your wrists and the ring on your thumb, the pictures on your phone and the too-big shirt hanging off one shoulder, you realized sitting around moping wasn't gonna solve anything; if you wanted your happiness, your friends, the love of your life back, you needed to step up and fight for them with everything you had. And so you wiped the tears from your cheeks and walked to the cliff's edge with your head held high, ready for the fall and whatever came with it. You were ready to fix your mistakes, no matter how badly it might hurt.

Still, you couldn't do it all on your own. You needed some help to make things right again and while you knew just who to ask, you weren't quite sure if they'd be willing to lend a hand. Desperate times called for desperate measures though and you penned a good old-fashioned letter, feeling like a heroine in a Jane Austen novel as you poured all your thoughts -your dreams, wishes, hopes- onto a piece of paper in bold blue ink and sent it off to its destination on Figure 8, your Hail Mary for a happy ending sealed up neatly in a single envelope.

Mack, bless her heart, did her best to keep your spirits up as you waited on a response but even her ever reassuring presence couldn't keep you from worrying as one week passed by, then two. Halfway through the third you'd almost given up, already wracking your brain for another way to make your plan work when your phone chimed with a text from an unknown number.

i'll help you

And just like that, the moment you'd been waiting for was finally within your reach; you told your parents not to expect you for Thanksgiving break, called your sister for a much needed pep talk, and started counting down the days until you'd see your friends again, for better or worse.

When you left the Outer Banks three years ago, it was sunny. You were sixteen, young and in love and scared about the future.

When you returned, it was in the middle of a storm. You were nineteen, a little bit older but no less in love and definitely still scared about what was waiting for you at the end of the road.

Rain pounded against the roof of Sarah Cameron's SUV as she drove away from the docks and toward the Chateau, her fingers tapping along to the music playing quietly through the radio. You sat in the passenger seat, soaked to the bone from your ferry ride from the mainland and shaking like a leaf despite the towel wrapped around your shoulders and the warm air flowing from the car's vents.

"Thanks for coming to get me," You said, wincing at the awkward lilt of your voice echoing in the small space as you spun JJ's ring around your thumb and stared out the windshield at the familiar sights streaking by in blurred shades of green and brown. Being back opened a Pandora's box of emotions in your head, both good and bad, and instead of trying to sort them out, you let them bounce around in your brain like a pinball machine and concentrated on methodically twirling the warm metal ring in circles on your finger.

Sarah briefly glanced away from the road to shoot you a small smile, her kind eyes softening at your visible nervousness. "Not gonna lie, I was pretty sure you hated me so when I got your letter it kinda...threw me for a loop. Sorry it took me so long to reply."

You wished the heated leather seat would swallow you whole as you winced again and wrapped the towel tighter around your shoulders. "For the longest time, I thought I did hate you but I realized I was just...scared of losing my friends and I took it out on you. You didn't deserve to be labeled the villain in my story when I was the one, um, sabotaging myself, I guess." You took a deep breath and picked at a loose thread tickling your arm. "And I'm really, really grateful for your help."

It was more than you wanted to admit out loud -nearly the same words were written in the letter peeking out from the center console of the car- but at the same time, you knew it was what needed to be said and from the way the blonde girl's fingers stopped tapping against the steering wheel, she knew she needed to hear it. At a red light, she quickly tapped out a text on her phone before tossing in back into her bag with another tiny grin in your direction.

"Happy to help. For what it's worth, I'm so sorry if I made you feel like you were being replaced, I never intended to hurt you or steal your friends or...or, I don't know, usurp-" 

"Sarah, stop. Please," You held up a hand to cut off her apology and offered her a self-deprecating smile. "I'm the one who's sorry. I let my...jealousy get the best of me and I feel so bad about all the shit I said 'cause that wasn't fair to you at all and I hope you can forgive me-"

"Y/N, there's nothing to forgive! We all say stupid shit when we're mad -trust me, I know." She interrupted with a bubbly, contagious giggle that seemed to scare away the gloomy storm clouds gathered over your head for a moment in time. "But I was never pissed at you, ever. I just want you to know that."

Stunned, you settled deeper into the seat and started playing with your ring again as she kept driving on, unbothered by your lack of response. You felt like you were thirteen again, back when Sarah and Kiara were your only friends, before the birthday disaster and the whole pogue versus kook feud that got completely out of hand; it felt...nice and you found yourself hoping that the blonde girl would still want to be your friend again, no matter what the others thought about your sudden return. 

"Thank you."

Sarah gave no indication she heard your quiet confession of gratitude but from the way you watched her smile grow out of the corner of your eye, you knew she did. The rest of the drive passed in companionable silence as you retreated into your own thoughts, your nerves getting worse and worse the closer you got to your destination.

You took a deep breath and let it out slowly through your nose, feeling like your heart was trying to beat its way through your rib cage. You hadn't been this anxious in a long, long time, so long you almost forgot how much you hated the tightness in your chest, how your palms would start to sweat, the way you'd chew the inside of your cheek until you tasted blood on your tongue. By the time Sarah pulled into an open spot beside the achingly familiar Volkswagen parked in front of the Chateau, you were surprised you were still able to breathe.

The sight of the tiny house, one you spent so many carefree days and beautiful nights in alongside your friends, standing virtually unchanged in front of you was like a shot to the heart and your hands, curled into fists on your lap, began to shake without warning. Shit, you were a godforsaken mess; how the hell were you supposed to do this without having a mental breakdown?

"I'm so scared."

The whispered words, barely audible over the torrential rain against the roof, slipped from your mouth before you could stop them and Sarah slowly reached one hand over to give your trembling wrist a reassuring squeeze, the corners of her mouth curled upward in a slight smile.

"Don't be. They're gonna be so happy to see you!"

You turned to look at her, eyebrows knit together in disbelief. "How are you so sure they still care about me?"

"I'm sure 'cause I've seen it. My God, if only you could've heard all the times they talked about you -'I wish Y/N was here,' 'remember that time with Y/N,' hell, just straight 'I miss Y/N so fucking much,'" She said bluntly and shifted in the driver's seat to face you head on, smiling wider at the thunderstruck look on your face. "Pretty sure I haven't gone a week without JJ saying that last one at least once." 

"I thought..." You paused, tongue darting out to run over your dry lips as you tried to put your jumbled feelings into words, "I thought he'd hate me -I mean, after all I've done, you think he still..."

"Loves you? Are you kidding?" Her reply was so enthusiastic it was hard not to believe her as she went on, her words like sunshine brightening the darkest corners of your mind. "He's still head over heels, I've never seen him even look at another girl in three damn years. You know he still wears your necklace, the one with the silver star? Kie told me all about it."

"I-I didn't." You remembered giving it to him the day you left, managing a shaky smile through your tears as you carefully clasped it around his neck, your fingers running over his skin as you settled the charm perfectly alongside that little shark tooth you'd grown to love.

('Be careful with this, baby. It's my favorite.' You had said, crying harder when he'd taken off one of his rings and slipped it onto your thumb.

'Well, this one's my favorite so take good care of it, okay?' His voice had been light but his eyes were heavy with unspoken words that you'd heard loud and clear because you knew your gaze said the exact same things.

don't let me go

don't break my heart

don't stop loving me)

You coughed to disguise the fat tears that started rolling down your face, quickly wiping them away with your sleeve but the blonde girl wasn't fooled as she gave your hand another friendly squeeze.

"Come on, they're probably wondering what's taking me so long," She sent a conspiratorial wink your way and grabbed her bag from the center console. "I told them I was picking up some pizzas but I have a funny feeling they won't be too pissed that I lied."

With a desperate grip on the strap of your backpack and your heart racing, you trailed behind Sarah through the rain to the front porch. 

"Ready?" She glanced back where you lingered at the top of the stairs, anxiously shuffling from foot to foot, and shot you a smile that did little to calm your nerves. "Just wait here!"

She knocked on the door before you could reply and yelled loud enough to be heard over the pouring rain, "Hey, it's me! Can somebody get the door? My hands are kinda full."

"Got it!"

Your bag slipped from your fingers and fell onto the porch with a loud thump at the sound of the voice floating through the open windows, a voice you heard nearly every night as you slept, in your dreams of a future you wanted with everything you had. You knew it better than your knew your own, knew every pitch and tone and lilt; quiet and raspy in the mornings when you woke up in each other's arms, loud and carefree during long days spent under the golden sun with the rest of your friends, soft and warm and laid bare at night when he showed how much he loved you with more than just words.

Sarah gave you an enthusiastic thumbs up before stepping to the side just as the door opened and you suddenly found yourself struggling to breathe as you stared into the wide blue eyes of your ex-boyfriend. JJ stared right back, one of the hands you used to hold clenched so tight around the doorknob his knuckles were white, the lips you used to kiss parted in surprise, the blond hair you used to run your fingers through falling onto his forehead like always and the familiar, beautiful sight of him standing close enough to touch made your knees weak.

"You're not pizza."

It was such a JJ thing to say and you didn't know whether to laugh or cry as you swallowed thickly and shook your head. "Sorry to disappoint you."

"I'm not."

"Oh."

Hope flared white hot in your chest at his words but it quickly started to fade, replaced by fear when he made no move toward you, his fingers still gripping tight to the door, and you felt your face start to heat in embarrassment as Sarah looked back and forth between the two of you like she was watching a tennis match. 

God, you were so stupid. What did you expect would happen, showing up out of the blue after over a year of no contact? Everything would fall into place again with just one long, heavy look? Believing it could be that easy turned you into a complete and total fool, tongue-tied and insecure and weak.

"Yo, what's the hold up?" John B's voice asked from inside the house and Sarah leaned down to call through the open window, "Come out here and find out!"

A wave of dizziness hit you like a truck and you took a sudden step back toward the stairs, arms wrapping around your stomach as it twisted itself into knots. "I'm sorry, I-I shouldn't have come. This was a mistake." You didn't notice the stricken look that crossed JJ's face or the three familiar, stunned expressions that appeared behind him in the darkened doorway before turning away and stumbling off the porch toward the road, leaving your bag behind and you definitely didn't notice how you barely made it off the bottom stair before a set of footsteps hastily gave chase. 

"It wasn't a mistake, Y/N!" JJ's desperate voice stopped you in your tracks, halfway across the yard with more than just rain running down your face. "Not to me, never to me."

His soft touch on your wrist sent shockwaves through your body and you instantly became putty in his hands, letting him turn you around without a fight to face him, watching in fascination as the downpour started to darken his gray shirt and flatten his hair against his forehead. Three years hadn't changed much about him -he was a little taller, hair a little longer, the muscles in his arms a little more defined- and when you met his wide-eyed gaze, beads of rain dripping from his long eyelashes like diamonds, you wondered if he was thinking about the differences time created between the younger you of the past and the you of the right now, too.

"Oh." You repeated dumbly, struggling for something, anything to say that didn't make you sound like an illiterate fool. Even at nineteen, words still weren't your strong suit so you let your actions speak for you as your hand reached out on its own accord to caress the silver star still clasped around his neck, the thumb still wearing his ring brushing slowly against the dip between his collarbones; he shivered, and you weren't really sure if it was from your touch or the cold. 

"Y/N." JJ said your name like a prayer, like he couldn't believe you were there in front of him, and you inhaled sharply when both of his hands slowly, carefully moved to cup your face, his calloused thumbs habitually wiping the tears from your cheeks over and over, even as more instantly replaced the ones he swept away. "I fucking missed you."

You stood there, looking like a damned drowned rat with your hair dripping into your eyes, shivering in your soaked jeans and Kildare County High School sweatshirt, the love of your life cradling your face so gently in his hands, and so many things you wanted to say flooding your brain but only the one that mattered the most managed to get by your trembling lips.  

"I'm still in love with you." 

You noticed a lot when you put your heart on the line: the steady, soothing sound of water falling through the trees, the bright, clean taste of rain on your tongue, how the sun was just barely starting to peek out from behind the stormy clouds, but they all paled in comparison to the little things you noticed about the boy in front of you; blue irises made even brighter by the red rimming his eyes, how he stepped closer on the wet grass until the tips of his scuffed boots touched your worn gray high tops, the way his hands trembled ever so slightly against your flushed face. 

"Well, it's your lucky day 'cause I'm still in love with you, too."

All of the breath left your lungs in one big rush when JJ smiled hopefully -oh, how you loved everything about that smile: his slightly crooked teeth, that dimple in his cheek, the endearing pink blush swept across his nose- and you felt yourself return it without a second thought, your own hope once again burning bright in your chest.

"Even after...everything?" Your voice shook like the fingers you slid into the hair at his nape and he leaned down to rest his forehead against yours, close enough you could feel his breath on your lips when he spoke.

"I told you I'd always love you, didn't I?"

You nodded, a delicious shiver running down your spine when he tilted his head just so and gently bumped your nose with his. You remembered all the times he did that through the years, a dizzying slideshow of memories that flashed through your mind like lightning, and your fingers wove themselves deeper in his hair. 

"I have so many things to apologize for," You said with a tiny, quiet shake of your head, tearing your eyes away from his in shame and staring over his shoulder toward where the rest of your friends watched from the porch, all crowded together at the top of the stairs with identical enthralled expressions on their faces. "There are so many mistakes I've made and people I've hurt and I have no idea how to even start saying sorry for it all." 

"Babe."

The sound of your old pet name caused your gaze to snap right back to his and your heart felt like it was about to beat right out of your chest when one of his hands trailed down the sensitive skin of your neck and then lower until it traced along the curve of your hip and left a line of fire in its wake.

"We'll figure that out later, okay?" JJ said as his fingers tucked a loose strand of wet hair behind your ear, a coy, ardent grin on his face. "'Cause I've been waiting three years to kiss you again and if I don't get to do it soon, I'm gonna lose my fucking mind."

You smiled -a wide, joyful, elated smile- and rose up on your tiptoes in anticipation. "Then kiss me." 

You didn't have to tell him twice. His lips pressed against yours desperately, like he needed you to breathe, like you were the very air in his lungs, religiously, like your mouth was the altar and he was there to worship as he pulled you close, the fingers of one hand tangling in your hair while the others dug into your hip. You kissed him back just as hard and the familiar taste of him on your tongue -mint, smoke, salt- sent that dearly missed spark racing through your veins like wildfire.

It was a little cliché, having your long-awaited reunion kiss in the rain but it was honest and candid and real and so much better than anything you could've dreamed. You lost yourself in his touch like you used to, clinging to him like a lifeline and pouring your whole heart into every fierce brush of your lips against his, both of you pulling away for a moment only to dive right back in each time. It was addictive, intoxicating, and you could've spent the rest of your life standing there in the middle of the yard and kissing like there was no tomorrow if a loud, ear-piercing wolf whistle hadn't come from the direction of the porch.

The two of you broke apart just barely, with foreheads still pressed together and swollen lips, and you couldn't stop yourself from giggling when JJ blindly flipped the bird over his shoulder before pulling you back in for another eager kiss that filled your whole body with an exhilarating, heavenly heat that never faded, even after four enthusiastic voices suddenly surrounded you like an excited swarm of nosy, buzzing bees.

"You aren't the only one who missed her, J." Kiara said, smiling widely as you reached out to grab her hand and pull her into a powerful one-armed hug, her chin resting on your shoulder.

"Yeah, stop hogging all the love!" John B added, throwing himself into the pile along with Pope, who slung an arm around your shoulders as he said, "Great to have you back, Y/N."

Sarah was the last to join and she quietly tucked herself under John B's arm with a pleased grin on her face, nodding when you mouthed 'thank you' in her direction. The six of you stood there in the rain, smiling like fools, and as the sun started to scare away the dark clouds overhead and in your heart, a weight you didn't even realize had been crushing your chest slowly began to lift away with each freeing breath. 

You still had a lot of work to do: wrongs to be righted, apologies to be made, explanations -not excuses- to be given for every shitty thing you did in your past. But as happy tears started streaming down your face once again and you felt the arms of the friends you’d thought were lost to you forever tighten around you at the sight, you knew in your bones all would be forgiven. You knew that after three long years, you'd finally come home.

-

let me know what you think! i read each and every one of your comments and cry because they mean so much to me! ❤

taglist ❤: @sinkbeneathwaves​ @cordeliascrown​ @maysbanks​ @jjpogueprincess​ @bibliophilewednesday​ @k-n-e​ @jiaraendgame​ @alexa-playafricabytoto​ @heypearce​ @sexualparkour​ (send me an ask if you’d like to be added or removed!)

[passable-talent]

Hi yes so I just finished the anakin punk au and it was uh perfect? And you should 100% please write more in that au it doesn’t even have to be in some coherent storyline, just more punk anakin please I am hooked

say no more my dear

I write this. and I think to myself “punks. they like weed. they drink. I should talk about that.”

and then I don’t. because I have a,,, responsibility to promote good health I guess?

don’t do drugs kids. most of them arent worth it i promise

and yes just like i mentioned wattpad in the last one tumblr is coming up on this one we’re breaking the FUCKING fourth wall

part one here

You passed out on his shoulder, exactly as he predicted, at about 2:00 AM.

He didn’t notice for a few minutes, and once he had, he had to make a very hard decision. 

He knew you were leaving in the morning, you had other places to be. And he had to get home, Cliegg was going to be pissed he’d been out this late as it was. But- just like you, he never wanted the night to end.

At 2:15, he shimmied out from under you, finding your room key quickly. Once he’d slipped it into his pocket, he picked you up, carrying you all the way back to your room. The door seemed to scream as it opened, but none of the girls were awake. He laid you onto the only empty bed, leaving your room key on the dresser, and kneeled at your beside, for just a moment. 

A night he wasn’t going to forget. One he wasn’t willing to leave behind. 

He found the notepad left by the hotel for guests and its nearby pen, scribbling his phone number onto it before smacking it onto your room key so that he knew you’d see it. 

He wasn’t taking any chances. He did everything he could to make sure that you were safe, that you’d sleep soundly, that he’d see you again. It was a bit of a walk back to where he’d left his car, at the venue, but it was worth it- he shrugged his jacket up around his neck against the cold and kept going, remembering how it’d felt to hold you. 

But, in all of his kindness, he had made one mistake. You didn’t get to say goodbye. 

You woke up in the hotel room the next morning, for a moment thinking that maybe you’d dreamed the whole thing. But then you realized you still had your shoes on, and you were laying on top of the sheets, why the hell would I do that, and you phone hadn’t been plugged in, and- 

And there was a phone number on the dresser. 

You weren’t really ‘dating’- you shouldn’t call it that. If you were going to call it that, then there would inevitably be a post on someone’s tumblr that you had a boyfriend, and who was he, where was he from, yada yada... that damn website already had half the internet convinced you were dating Padme, you didn’t want to add any more fuel to the fire. 

So no, you weren’t dating. But you were texting every day. You learned so much about him, about how he was raised by his mom and worked at her friend Watto’s auto shop, about his step-brother and future step-sister-in-law, how his mom died when he was nineteen, about how he’d tried to move to California with his friend Obi-Wan a few years ago, but it fell through. In return, you told him about your life- living in the outskirts of San Francisco, being pushed into ballet lessons as a kid (as he said- ‘that’s why you look weightless on stage!’), being cut out from your family for quitting college to pursue music. 

You texted every day and every night, sent him videos from gigs, and he sent dumb little snapchats from underneath whatever car he was working on. You expected that to be it, probably for a long time- neither of you had the money nor the time to see each other more often. So you held onto the connection you had, the night you’d spent together. 

And you thought that’d be it. But- the universe has a funny way of surprising you. 

Your record label was based in LA, so you lived in Salta Ana, about thirty miles away, where the real estate was way cheaper. The band lived together, close as four friends could be, so they knew all about how you’d fallen for Anakin. Ahsoka would notice you glued to your phone, and ask snarkily “texting skyguy?” to which you always scolded her that his name was Skywalker. 

Living so close to LA made it easy to do gigs at any venue that would take you- bars, clubs, a particularly anarchist biker hall. A bar- such was the case for tonight. 

Like usual with a gig like this, Aayla had taken to instagram and called any fan in the area, so the bar was mostly filled with people who knew the music, but there were regulars, too. People who couldn’t be damned to listen to the lyrics, and just let the atmosphere move them. 

The setlist changed, when you were at a place like this. You didn’t necessarily rely on the hundred voice chorus that you loved so much, and so couldn’t include some of those songs. Your music strayed a little more to the rock end of the spectrum, when you played in places like this. With that high energy came faster music, more running around the stage, more movement, but you weren’t tired, when the set ended at 11:25. You were more energized than usual, in fact.

“Pads, I’ve never heard you solo like that!” You said, a bright smile on your face as you pushed out of the employee entrance of the bar. She gave you thanks, but not a moment later stopped dead, not saying a word, staring at you. You paused, looking at her, then Ahsoka and Aayla, who’d both stopped, too. 

“What?” Ahsoka and Aayla, though, were looking at something past you, which made you realize that Padme was, too. You turned, and leaning against the wall was- was Anakin. 

“Oh my god,” you said under your breath, dropping into a run toward him immediately. “Anakin!” He shoved himself off of the wall, letting you run into his arms, and just held you. You pulled away to look at him, amazed that after months, here he was, right in front of you, real. 

“What are you doing here?” you asked, bewildered, surprised, ecstatic. 

“Visiting Obi-Wan,” he said, and he lifted his hand to your face, giving you a good look at that tattoo you hadn’t quite forgotten, dark lines reaching from his elbow to his palm. 

“And you,” he added. You couldn’t help it- you hadn’t seen him in so long, you couldn’t help the way you leaned into it when he pulled you into a kiss, and this time you weren’t exhausted, and you could let yourself feel it, you could pay attention to his chapped lips and the way he slid them over yours, still soft, even after waiting in the cold. You never wanted to leave this moment, like so many of the others that you spent with him, his hands on your face keeping away the January air. 

“Yeah, I’m heading home,” Ahsoka said, making you break the kiss. “Coming, or not?” You looked back at her with a bit of a glare, letting Anakin’s hands fall to your neck. 

“You guys go ahead,” you said, checking your jacket pocket for the essentials- wallet, phone, house keys. “I think I have a tradition to uphold.” 

The bar you’d played at tonight was a bit far away from the place you wanted to take Anakin, but you didn’t mind the walk, since it was with him. You’d been texting every day, and yet it felt different, there was so much more to talk about now. 

Apparently, Anakin hadn’t seen Obi-Wan since he’d left to move to LA, so it was a visit to an old friend as much as it was an excuse to see you again. 

“So you’re staying with him?” You asked, leading him by the arm down the street. 

“Yeah,” he said, hooking his elbow into yours, which let him keep his hands in his pockets. “He’s got an apartment in east LA, it’s got a nice couch.”

“East LA, not bad. What’s he do?” 

“He’s a talent manager, actually. Went to business school and everything.” Anakin paused, suppressing a chuckle. “He told me that he’d love to represent you, if you didn’t already have someone.” 

“Sadly, we do,” you said, playful, “but I’ll keep him in mind.” 

You’d pretend it was the winter chill that brought the flush to your cheeks- he’d told his friend about you. That had to mean you were important to him, right?

“Where are we heading, anyway?” He asked, and you, luckily, could channel your inner dramatic and turn toward the doorway you’d been heading toward all along. 

“Right here,” you said, and you took him inside. 

This was your recording studio- it was always open, so that any artist could stop in and get out whatever creativity they had. You showed your ID card to the lobby clerk, who approved it and called the elevator. Anakin followed your lead until the door closed, and just like you had on the night you met him, you pressed the button for the highest floor. 

“This is one of the buildings for our record company,” you said, the elevator so familiar. 

“Which would explain why he let you in,” Anakin said, a slight teasing tone to his voice. All you could do was chuckle, waiting for the elevator to reach the top floor.

From there, you lead him to a glass door, and swiped your ID card through a reader near its frame so you could step outside. 

“This is the rooftop set,” you said, gesturing to the wide space, “It’s where we film a lot of music videos.” This close to the door, it was hard to see over the side of the building, and so you took Anakin’s hand.

“The city lights keep us from stargazing,” you said with a smile, and brought him to the guardrail at the edge of the roof. “So I thought I’d show you the city’s version of the night sky.” Looking out across the city, there were a thousand orange sparkles, windows illuminated in buildings stretching as far as the eye could see. Criss-crossed between them were lines of red and white, LA traffic clogging the city streets even so late at night. 

No matter how many times you came up here, you’d never get tired of the view. Fifty-five stories up, there were other buildings that dwarfed this tower, but the west was free of them, so your view to the horizon was clear, even in the LA overcast. 

“Wow,” he said, looking out over it all beside you. “I’ve never- I don’t think I’ve ever been up this high.” You fixed him with a surprised expression, leaning your elbows down onto the banister. 

“No? Really?”

“I didn’t grow up in a city, like you,” he said, settling in beside you, his arm pressed to yours. You let your head rest onto his shoulder, remembering the night you met. 

“I’m glad you came out to LA,” you said, “though I’m hoping you’ll stay a while. I  want to go on an actual date with you.” You heard him exhale.

“You don’t call this a date?” he asked, and you lifted your head, looking at him, the lights of the city giving his face the slightest, golden glow. 

“Well, I mean-” If this was a date, then so had been the one after the show, back in October. Which meant this was your second date, and you’d technically been ‘dating’ this whole time, which kinda made him your- boyfriend? 

“Is it?” Anakin slipped his hand into yours, lacing your fingers together.

“This is better than any dinner and movie we could’ve gone to, I think.” He turned over your hand, tracing his first finger over the skyline tattoo that bisected your forearm. “Especially since it seems like this means a lot to you.” You couldn’t believe he’d noticed that tattoo- it meant he really was paying attention to you. 

“Yeah,” you said with a smile, lifting your arm up, his hand still held in yours, aligning the tattoo with the skyline you were looking at. “I got this done after we did our first video.” Silently, he examined the ink and compared it to the sky, seeing what you meant. 

“That’s really cool,” he said, bringing your hand back down, since his fingers were getting cold in the wind, and he had to assume yours were too. 

“How long are you going to be in town?” You asked, resting your temple down onto his shoulder again. 

“A week, or so. Watto says he needs me to work on a mustang that we’re getting- I think Cliegg told him to say that since he doesn’t want me in the city.” 

“Well, I don’t want to undermine your dad,” you said, “But I wouldn’t complain if you stayed here a lot longer than that.” You ran your thumb over the back of his hand. “It’s really nice to actually have you with me, and not over the phone.” Anakin turned to kiss the top of your head.

“Tell me about it. It’s worse for me, I promise- I listen to your music all the time, and it just makes me want to see you.” 

“Sometimes I forget that you were once just a fan,” you said with a laugh, “listening to our music.” 

“The luckiest one in the world,” Anakin added, and you almost wondered how you’d ever lived without him. 

You let a moment pass, in silence. 

“I’m twenty five,” you started, wondering if you had the courage to finish, “do you think I’m too young to be in love?” Anakin didn’t respond, at first. He turned to you, lifting his furthest hand to your face, making you look up at him. You could never get over those blue eyes- you’d forgotten how intense they were. 

“I guess it depends on the guy,” Anakin said, his teeth quickly catching his lower lip. “Do you think you are?” You reached up past his arm to his face, your first finger tracing his eyebrow before your palm came to rest on the ridge of his cheekbone.

“No,” you said, and you rushed forward to meet his lips. 

-🦌 Roe

[angelmichelangelo]

First Line Fic Game

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favourite opening line. Then tag 10 of your favourite authors!

Thank you for the tag @panlesters !! <3 i’m not sure who has and hasn’t been tagged already but i’ll tag the lovely @echoedvoices and anyone else who wants to join in :D

1. and when the whole world is watching

Walker is unhinged.

It’s apparent in the way his eyes are bulging from his head, the irritable twitch of his fingers, the thick pulse in his neck that strains against the pale of his skin like a snake writhing under bladed grass.

It was also apparent in the dark, red blood splatter on the once polished shield he held tightly in trembling hands.

2. the no man’s land of my mind

Everything is cold. His body is tickled with it, his skin shivers as the icy breeze brushes past him, and when his muscles tense and constrict, there’s a dull ache; body used and underused in unison.

His head is throbbing, like his brain pulsating against the walls of his skull, banging like a tight skinned drum, desperate with each beat to escape itself.

3. the fox

“He’s gonna be sick.”

There’s a voice that feels both a million miles away as well as super close at the same time, like they’re literally in his ear.

4. company policy

There’s music thumping through the wall, faded and muted that makes it hard to hear the exact lyrics, but if Dan was to strain his ear, he’s sure he’s able to pinpoint what it is, since he’s sure that recognising music is some kind of lame superhero power he has, but in all honesty, it’s a little hard to concentrate with someone railing him from behind.

5. catboy roleplay thursdays

Thursdays, Phil decides, are for his time. After hours of watching Jenna Marbles videos, Phil soon becomes very accustomed to the phrase that becomes a household name signature in his house, “me time.”

6. filters

Phil is sure he’s probably wasted about eighty percent of his adult life on his phone. Between the endless scrolling through TikTok and the wormhole that is Snapchat clickbait news stories, Phil is pretty much glued to his phone, even when he knows he shouldn’t be. 7. king of packed lunches

“How the hell do they make it look so good?”

Phil’s back is aching, burning almost, as he’s leant over the kitchen counter, squinting down at his phone as the TikTok replays again for what feels like the billionth time, the speedy hands of a mother perfecting what seems like the world's most incredible lunch box.

8. the fisherman’s guide

A seagull soars across the sky. Its wings spread wide, momentarily paused against the blue as it glides through the air, not before it flaps its wings again. It passes through the sunlight, briefly shadowing the world for a moment in a blink of darkness.

9. an empty house

Numbness spreads across his body like he’s been dunked in freezing cold water. It’s tingling in the tips of his fingers, burning fiercely in the soles of his feet, making him want to just run.

The police station is too loud. It’s too bright and it’s too big and his heart is so heavy where it sits in his chest, it feels like a rock pulsing against his ribs, each beat and each out of sync pounding is like another dull ache there, spreading across each inch of his body until he’s completely and utterly numb.

10. fall and i’ll catch you

The early sunlight filters through the half pulled blinds of the bedroom window. It oozes all over the room, dancing against the walls and door, falling over items dotted around the teenager’s room. It floods over his body, the small warm feeling prickling against his skin, and when it comes to rest across his face, does it wake Peter up.

11. eight million

She sits by the phone, fingers trembling, her leg bounces with a bubble of anxiety that flows through her body, jolting every nerve in her body like hot electricity. He was supposed to be on the bus. He was supposed to be okay. But it’s been half an hour since the world ended and she hasn’t heard from anyone.

12. thanatophobia

It’s a fear of dying. It burns itself into so many minds across the earth and universe. It lives, deep rooted for a lifetime, or is sparked to life early. It’s a bubbling anxiety that grows in the pit of your stomach and comes out in sleepless nights and heavy beating hearts. It’s a fear that can’t be faced.

13. familiar faces

Phil’s deep into a Mario Kart round when there’s a knock at the door, making him jump. He looks at the door, then back at the TV where he’s slipped into eight place as Baby Peach absolutely totals him with a green shell that–

The door knocks again, and Phil pauses his game, his own Mii frozen on the screen with a look that can only be described as utter disappointment as Phil turns away and heads towards the door.

14. end of the page

“Thought? Feelings? Hate it, love it? Kinda wanna set fire to it?”

Phil’s shoulders are shaking with a silent laugh as he takes the mug from Dan’s offering hand, bringing the rim of the mug to his lips as he takes a long, slow sip. Honey flavoured tea, his favourite.

15. coming home

The key in the lock seems to echo so loudly in the quiet of the night, and as Phil struggles through the front door, feet clip clipping loudly into the hall, he can hear the sounds of Dan’s shushing as their dog bounds towards them from the other room, probably where he’d made himself on the sofa he knows he’s not allowed up onto, and Phil pulls the baby carrier up out of his eyeline, shushing him further as he starts to whine, tail wagging, clearly wanting some attention since he’d been left alone most of the day.

16. vacation getaway

Phil is squeezing the last of the suncream into the palm of his hand, squirting out rather pathetically, he looks at if for a moment as it melts between his fingers under the hot sun, and he starts rubbing it up and down his arm, when there’s suddenly a shadow being casted over him.

17. just another drop stitch

When Hermione wakes, she’s cold. It’s something she’s become very accustomed to in their cottage, and as their first winter here had rolled around, she’d had to use her initiative to find ways to keep her waking feeling freezing.

18. beneath the ice

When Kurt wakes, the first thing he does is stumble out of bed, almost tripping over his own feet as he runs towards his window, pressing his face against the glass, fogging it up with his breath as a grin breaks across his face, eyes lighting up at the sight of the snow that’s now blanketing the outside world. He doesn’t hesitate to spin on his heel, rushing out of his room to find his dad, skipping two, three steps at a time.

19. in sickness and in health

Of course both Dan and Phil get sick during their honeymoon.

Of all the places they’d travelled around the world, Hawaii had been one place they’d somehow managed to skip out on.

20. dear santa

Dear Santa,

My name is Dan and I live in England and I’m eight years old. I’m in Year 3 at school and it’s okay I guess. The work isn’t so hard but the other kids in my class are kind of mean and I don’t really like them that much.

[airis-paris14]

Dress Up 4

Summary: She’s not his fiancee, but no one else needs to know. 

Warnings: None

A/N: It’s literally been a whole year since I’ve posted anything on here. This pandemic has given me a lot of free time. I’ve got a lot of ideas , two stories to post, and two stories to finish. I’m very excited to get back into my groove. Hope you all enjoy and are staying safe. Wear a mask, wash your hands, and Social distance. ✨

“Damn it all!” T’challa hissed, his hand flying onto the table. “Calm yourself!” Ramonda admonished, glaring at her son as Shuri frowned at the cake in front of her. “It has been weeks mama, weeks and still she shows no sign of improvement. Did we choose the dumbest of them all!”

“T’Challa you will watch your mouth!”

“So she can not bake a cake, neither can you. Everyone has a talent, maybe we should stop conforming her to our standards and look at her own.” Shuri pointed at Sirobie where she sat, her back facing the group.

“The cake is not the problem. The problem is that we have tested now, eight talents, and she has a knack for none of them. She is utterly talentless according to Wakanda’s standards. If she is to stand in for Kamyra, then she must present herself as an embodiment of Wakanda, held to Wakanda’s standards.”

“If only you would hold your betrothed to that standard, maybe we wouldn’t be in this position in the first place!” Shuri fired off, glaring at her brother. Sirobie stood quietly and glided out of the room, stopping only to glance back at the siblings. She sighed before continuing into the hall. Sirobie hurried back to her room, fighting back the tears burning the corners of her eyes. She blindly pushed open her door, jumping slightly at the women who stood in front of her. “Kasigo, Eshe,” she quickly wiped from under her eyes, “I was not expecting you until later.”

“We found your art supplies and thought we would drop them off for you to have after your session with the Queen, are you alright my lady?” Eshe frowned. “I will be fine, thank you both,” Sirobie offered a small smile. “ Are you sure you would not like some company?” Kasigo offered. “I am well. Or I will be.”

“If you insist, we will be back later tonight,” Eshe reaffirmed, both of the women dipping into an elegant curtsy. “Thank you,” Sirobi smiled, until both of the doors were shut. Glancing at the blank canvas and supplies, she let tears begin to fall from her eyes as she walked back out onto the balcony. She methodically set up her station, letting her tears fall freely in a trail from the balcony to her room.

A few minutes later, she sat in comfort in front of her easel. Rushing back into her room, she grabbed last week's sketch from her night stand and methodically traced the design onto the canvas. The scratch of the pencil lead, soothed the students nerves as she let the tears fall.

The tears began to slow, as the woman emerged from the fountain side. Minutes, then an hour passed before she placed the final stroke. Placing the pencil down, and finally wiping her eyes, Sirobie sighed, turning to grab her paints. Only to run smack into the king’s chest.

“You never told us you paint.” the king stated, staring at the mesmerizing sketch of the mountain. Sirobie moved around him to begin placing and mixing her paint. “You never asked me what I could do. You only assumed.”

She moved intentionally around the king. Finally allowing herself to move back to the easel once the brushes, paint, and water were all comfortably positioned. She began by filling in and highlighting the rich brown of the woman’s skin. Displaying her natural curves and glow where the sunlight hit her skin.

“Why do you start with her body and not the mountain, or the large expanse of sky.”

“She is the focal point of the painting. She deserves time and detail. This also allows me to mold the elements of nature to highlight her beauty, and presence, even more.”

“You paint beautifully. Yet you study film. Why?”

“I am a storyteller at heart. Sometimes I paint what the director in me, envisions in my head.”

“I apologize for my conduct and words earlier.”

“Why?”

“Because they were cruel and wrong-”

Sirobie’s hand froze mid stroke, lifting slightly off the canvas. “No, not an excuse or the polite answer. Why are you apologizing if you mean it? Perhaps because Queen Mother is angry at you?” She continued on with her light strokes.

“Because I did not mean it. I also made you cry. That is something I promised myself that I would never do. If I could help it. I never wanted to make someone cry.”

“Why do you say things you do not mean your majesty?”

“Because I cannot grow close to you. You are not mine to keep. You look like her. But you are not her. I am quickly falling for you, but I can’t have you. I thought that by pushing you away, the separation would be easier for us both.” The king sighed. “I hope you can forgive me lady Sirobie. Let me earn your trust.”

The student placed down her brush. “We can see. Starting tomorrow. At the hospital.”

“I’ll see you then?” the king offered a small smile. Sirobie turned to slight one of her own. “I’ll see you then.”

Sirfobie practiced her measured steps as she walked down the hall to the king’s room. The desired effect was to glide. The young woman in training was not there yet. She had graduated from appearing as though she was perpetually tripping, to trying to hold back a run. Upon noticing her practice, T’Challa smiled. “You are improving sithwanda sam. “

His words startled the student. She quickly regained her balance and looked up. “Oh thank you.” she replied. “Shall we go?” the king offered the woman his arm. Sirobie hesitantly accepted. “Please, relax around me. If we were truly engaged, we would be all we have besides our families. There isn’t much privacy in this lifestyle.”

“I can tell. I guess it’s best that this is fake then.” Sirobie replied. “If that is the way you feel.” T’Challa replied, stepping away to open the door for Sirobie.

“Thank you.”

The king slid in the other door. As soon as the door shut, the driver pulled off. T’Challa cleared his throat. “I thought that maybe we could get to know each other a little better.”

“Why, I am not your fiancée,” Sirobie sassed, staring out the window. “I know. I just thought that it would be nice to know each other a little better-”

“Why are you all of a sudden being so nice T’Challa.” She cut him off. “I thought, and last night-”

“I don’t know where I stand with you T’Challa. The first few weeks I’m here, you embarrass me. Chastise me like a child. Essentially call me talentless. But now you want to get to know me? I don’t understand you.”

“I am trying to be better. I was acting out of character. I am just so afraid of what happens if this plan falls through. If I do not marry the oldest child of the Habredies royal family. Shuri, must marry her brother. He is a crude young man. With no feelings and qualms about laying a hand on women. I do not want that for my little sister. She is too bright and strong willed to have to endure that. He will break her. I cannot let that happen on my watch.”

Sirobie, placed her hand on the king’s squeezing softly. “I am trying to keep my grandfather’s promise, but Kamyra is not my idea of a wife. She hates my country, and complains non-stop. She is image over everything, I often feel like I can not let down my walls around her. So as awkward as it is for me to admit this. I was afraid that I would fall in love with you Sirobie. I just can’t be selfish in this situation.”

“I understand. I at least hope that we can become friends,”the student offered. “Of course,” The king squeezed her hand in return as they pulled up to the hospital.

“This is it,” Sirobie sighed as the driver opened T’Challa’s door. The king briefly let go of her hand and hopped out of the car. He reached a hand back in to help the student out of the car.Once she was out, he kept her hand around his as they made their way into the hospital.

“Your majesties,” a middle aged woman smiled. My name is Hapset. I am the director of the Women and Children’s hospital of Wakanda. If you’ll follow me, the children are very excited to meet you both.” The woman smiled, leading the couple down various hallways and staircases to an open play area.

There, nurses played with children, ranging from toddlers to highschoolers. All doing their own activities. The room lit up as soon as several children recognized the couple.Murmurs of “the king” and “she’s a princess” erupted around the room as children moved towards the couple. Nurses grabbed the toddlers and escorted them back to the nursery as Mrs. Hapset began to speak.

The couple was quickly flooded with conversation and stories. They laughed, took pictures and even played games with the children. Many of the teenagers were surprised that Sirobie and T’Challa both knew and used snapchat. As well as they both attended school out of country. The king hoped that wouldn’t be too big a deal, as they had both let it slip. Taking their final pictures and waving their goodbyes, the couple followed the director to the nursery.

“In here, we house our toddler daycare during the day, for parents who can’t be here with their children. As well as babies who are awaiting adoption.”

Sirobie’s face dropped as she gestured to a crib. “May I?”

“Of course your majesty.”

T’Challa watched as the student stepped up to the crib and gently lifted the baby from its cradle. “Hi love.” She cooed gently, rocking the baby.

“That’s Camden. His mother had just finished a war dog mission in the Americas.”

“Where is she now?”

“The war dog life is not suited for children. Just as some are not suited for parenthood.” The director smiled sadly.

“Of course,” T’Challa replied, watching as Sirobie bounced the child in her arms. For a brief second, imagining if she was the mother of his child, and she was staring at him like that. It was hard to imagine Kamyra in that position. With a newborn nestled in her arms. “Cwan I see?” a little boy walked over to the queen. He couldn’t be older than three. Quickly checking with Hapset, Sirobie bent down to the boys height. “Why he face so small?” The little boy tilted his head. “He is still growing. One day he’ll be just as big as you.”

“Really?” the little boy smiled up in wonder at Sirobie. “Really,” she beamed. “Wow. Was I that small?

On a whim, T’Challa found himself bending down with Sirobie and the child. “Yes you were. But look at how big and strong you are now. I bet you could take the black panther in a fight. “Black panter.”

“That’s right, a little black panter,” Sirobie smiled. Shooting a brilliant smile at T’Challa. A flash of light alerted the couple that they were no longer alone. And that this was not their family. Press flashbulbs went off all around them as they said their goodbyes and made a hasty exit.

Once back in the limo, T’Challa directed their driver off the path, and onto a dirt road. “You might want to take your heels off for this part. The king removed his shoes as Sirobie did the same.

T’Challa spoke to the driver and he quickly backed up and drove off. “How are we supposed to get back?” Sirobie pouted. “We shall walk,” the king replied nonchalantly as he began walking away from the student.

“Do you truly like children?” he asked as she caught up to him. “I’ve always had a soft spot for them.They make me genuinely happy.”

“The way you looked at that baby today. You seemed truly happy. At peace.”

“I was. It has been so long since I was able to hold a baby. I rarely get to see my younger sisters. I took care of them when they were that little.”

“You truly miss them?”

“I do.”

“Kamyra does not want children.”

“Do you?” The king did not reply and Sirobie feared she had crossed a line. “I’m sorry if that-”

“Yes,” the King interrupted, “I do want children.”

“Oh.” Sirobie nodded.

“Sirobie Johnson. May I take you out to dinner tomorrow?”

“I thought we shouldn’t get close?”

“We should not. But I hardly doubt I’ll be able to forget you either way,” the king smiled.

“Then, yes. I’ll have to check my schedule with Queen mother first of course,” Sirobie teased.

“And I with Okoye,” the king chuckled. “I look forward to it Lady Sirobie.”

Taglist: @almostpurelysmut @tchoking @sisterwifeudaku @wikiwakanda @royallyprincesslilly @90sinspiredgirl @thedelightfulone @autumn242 @purple-apricots @kumkaniudaku @queertrex @kaciidubs @halfrican-heat @leahnicole1219 @kreolemami @mzbritt @derangedcupcake @chaneajoyyy @lalapalooza718 @ororowrites @sarcastic-sunshines @sarahboseman @waitingonafriend @faatassbitch @autumn242 @purple-apricots @skysynclair19 @gorjiss @yoyolovesbucky @builtalongthewayside @ilcb7 @dopegalkk @shesakillerkween

[gayoperatorgunclub]

Hi, we have yet to officially meet on Discord and I wanted to say welcome to the group. I noticed that you are open for asks, so I was wondering if you could tell me about your opinion of the Rook x Doc pairing and some hcs? If it bothers you then it's okay I understand

hi!!!!! thank you so much for the warm welcome!!! ALSO thank you for respecting my personal opinion and comfort about rook x doc!!!!! since i really like the possibility for a sort of father/son relationship between them, i’ve done some hcs from this list for them. you can read it as romantic if you want, but i’m really just vibing with these ones. i hope you enjoy!!!!

How do they feel about people shorter/taller than them? - gustave is completely comfortable with his height. he’s tall enough to not get made fun of, and short enough to be able to be comfortably held by his s/o. julien, on the other hand, will threaten every operator who’s taller than him. he has leaped onto oryx’s shoulders from above, attempted to tackle sledge, decided he would only spar against amaru, and, when drunk, has tried to perform WWE moves on montagne. he is the epitome of “i will beat you the fuck up. no cap. *punching noises* bitch.” 

What are they like on social media? (What’s their username, profile pic, etc.) - gustave knows how to operate social media, and is familiar with certain niches on many of them, but doesn’t have any accounts of his own. he just doesn’t really care enough. there is a fanpage of him on instagram, courtesy of twitch and julien. speaking of, julien has an account on twitter, instagram, snapchat, and vsco, and is extremely active on all of them. here’s what he uses them for:

twitter: shitposting and venting

instagram: aesthetics and vaguely confusing/threatening updates on his life

snapchat: chaos videos of him and twitch being bastardous

vsco: aesthetics and horse pics

Their sexuality? - gustave is either gay or bi (really just depends on the mood, just understand that he is under no circumstances straight. he’s just not. don’t do him dirty like that) and julien is gay but drinks an infinite amount of respect women juice (gustave does too but he also gets pegged by his hypothetical gf so 👀👀👀) 

Preferred weather? - gustave absolutely ADORES rainy weather. people have found him lying face down on the patio during thunderstorms, just. vibing. meanwhile, julien loves it when the weather’s sunny and warm, with fluffy white clouds in the sky. his ideal date is a picnic out on a prairie where they can cloudgaze, and maybe, if they stay long enough, stargaze as well

What’s their sleeping schedule? - gustave has no sleep schedule to speak of. when he next collapses is purely up to the gods. he has slept for 72 hours straight, and he’s gone a week on several well-timed 30 minute power naps. julien, meanwhile, is a bit of a health nut, so he is very serious about his schedule, specifically, when he eats, excercises, sleeps, wakes up, everything has a specific time slot. at the same time, he can and will get up in the middle of the night for a snack, prompting gustave to set up a surveillance system with speakers so if julien tries to eat their supply of ice cream, gustave can yell at him. this has led to julien avoiding the kitchen after dark because “god resides there after-hours” 

Favorite music? - gustave likes classic and new wave rock (think the Beach Boys, Queen, The Talking Heads, David Bowie, Elton John, The B-52′s, Depeche Mode, and many others) but he also really likes music in general, so he doesn’t have a real favorite. julien will only listen to a genre he describes as “gay yearning and longing with hints of faerie and cottagecore aesthetics” so, hozier and cavetown. 

How’s their cooking? - gustave is a culinary mastermind and julien nearly burnt down the kitchen making microwave ramen

It’s movie night, what movie do they pick? - i think it was @juduseye that wrote about gustave loving Casablanca, and honestly that hc is 🔥🔥🔥. i think julien would pick a movie like Princess and the Frog, Mulan, Atlantis, and other movies from disney’s “weird” period

How would they hold up in a pillow war? - they are masters of pillow warfare. they are sworn allies, and team up against everyone else in rainbow. they win every. single. time

What’s their sleeping position? - gustave is either starfished out on his bed, or curled up around whoever he’s in bed with. julien sleeps on his stomach, cuddling with his pillow

Who do they go to for comfort? - EACHOTHER 🥺🥺🥺

Something small that they enjoy? - gustave loves his collection of plushies and fleece blankets, and julien is VERY proud of his model train collection 

How do they feel about physical contact by others? - they both welcome it with open arms. they’re built like friends. made to cuddle. certified to be huggable. in some countries, they’re actually registered therapy animals 

What is enough to bring them to tears? - for gustave: loss, death, and thinking about that one comic of a meteor with a hat that says “i heart dinos” holding a map of “dinosaur world” (earth) and looking so excited BUT IT’S THE METEOR THAT CAUSED THE EXTINCTION OF THE DINOSAURS AND IT DOESN’T KNOW THAT IT CAN’T VISIT THEM BECAUSE IT’LL CAUSE THE DINOSAURS TO DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!! (i also start crying whenever i think about that fucking comic) 

julien: same as gustave but add people having low expectations of him, making fun of how young he is, and sarah mclachlan commercials

Biggest pet peeve? - Bigotry. and chewing with your mouth open

How well do they take care of themselves? - they both claim to be self sufficient but gustave legally can’t drive and julien tried to soften butter in a microwave but ended up with an electrical fire

What’s something they like that may be surprising to others? - gustave adores fashion niches, and julien knows everything about the legend of zelda

Do they consider others family? - uhhhhhhhhh, YEAH

Any bad habits that they have? - gustave: no sleep, blames himself for everything, is lactose intolerant but eats ice cream daily 

julien: midnight snacks, yelling at the tv, fighting anyone taller than him

What’s their idea of a perfect vacation? - for gustave, either a trip to a city with a lot of historical sites and museums, or a trip to his family beach house. vibe. chill. fuck nonstop. for julien, hawaii. that is all 

Do they get lost easily? Will they ask for directions if they are? - gustave will never admit it, but he gets lost walking in a straight line. he gets distracted!! undiagnosed adhd check! julien knows where things are and how to get to them, based on other places and landmarks, but he really couldn’t tell anyone else how to get somewhere 

The strangest thing they have ever seen? - gustave once walked in on tachanka in drag. now they watch drag race together. julien is consistently the one to find gustave lying face down on the balcony during thunderstorms. it’s worrying

How well do they accept advice? - gustave is too nice to say anything to someone’s face, but unless you’re one of the very few people he trusts enough to accept advice from, he has to resist the urge to do the opposite of what you advise. meanwhile, julien is constantly receiving advice, but in reality, he’s one of the most wise people in rainbow. it’s just that he says things like “take it easy. BUT TAKE IT” that make people think he’s a hot mess

How much do they swear? - gustave will only swear in worst case scenarios (which are more common than he cares to admit), and julien likes seeing the scandalized looks on people’s faces when they hear him cuss someone out 

Do they like being in pictures? - gustave will allow like three people to photograph him, because he likes their style and knows they won’t do him dirty with angles and such. julien is self-conscious about his smile, so he usually does it to em in group pictures

Is there anything they’re bad at? - gustave is terrible at pronouncing certain words, and julien doesn’t do well with limits

What’s their morning schedule? - gustave: wake up, pray, eat, go to work

julien: wake up, hit snooze (x10), be late for work 

Any past injuries? - gustave’s terrible computer posture has finally caught up with him, and now you won’t see him without an ice pack for his lower back, and julien is too young to have any chronic injuries, but he has broken his arm during training 

Something that disgusts them? - gustave hates long hair. it’s just so stringy and it makes him gag!!! he also hates stringy cheese because it makes him think of long strands of hair and all of a sudden he’s physically nauseous. julien can’t stand holes. trypophobia ass bitch 

[tanoraqui]

I’ve decided my purpose as a tma avatar would be to annoy - or possibly entertain? - all my fellow avatars by coming up with increasingly weird names for their patrons. No repeats ever. What am I, personally an avatar of? Who knows. Doesn’t matter. “Wow, the Mother of All Break-Up Songs is rocking it, here,” I say as I stroll into Mooreland House for another cocktail party full of meaningless small talk that will leave us all feeling empty inside. Jude Perry appreciated “Remains of Paradise (CA)”, but tried to set me on fire for “Red Hot Chili Peppers Without The Chili”. Only Simon Fairchild likes me. I snapchat him pictures of empty sky with the caption “BODE” and he responds with endless ocean captioned “LORGE.” I’m systematically running through ways to refer to Sauron for Beholding; I ran out of canon epithets years ago; now I’m down to “the boss of those guys who once asked the Old Gaffer for directions” and the like. Fortunately, there’s a lot of characters in Middle-Earth, and I’m willing to run through every one of them in relation to the Eye. Elias has tried to have me killed three times. Gertrude high-fives me in passing (she thinks I’m useless, but harmless.) I’m living my best life.

[stoplookingupforheaven]

one october night

i miss my favorites a little extra today, so please enjoy this little snippet i wrote right after doom days and then edited at 2 this morning!

the sun is honey. it’s soft light, an amber glow that permeates the air and the concrete and the faces of the people around us. it warms the air. it warms my skin and turns my hair to auburn for a split second. we laugh and talk and take silly photos of each other in line and the sun slips away. the sky trades orange for dusky purple in a smooth blend. there are no clouds to speak of, just the perfectly-fading sky and the clean, square lines of the building that still holds the sun’s honey-warmth in its concrete walls. i lean against it and hold my phone tightly in my hand. we can see brightly colored shirts in a display through a window. the entryway is painted in a rainbow of lasers, stripes that shoot off every direction and give the vague feeling of being in hyperspace. the sun finally disappears entirely as i offer my ticket to a security guard and step inside.

the room is plasma. it’s a rippling electricity, sparking through each body waiting inside, building up and ebbing away, leaving a little excitement behind each time, building and building until the room feels ready to explode. i can feel it in the fall out boy song playing over the speakers that i sing a few bars of under my breath. i feel it in the hand-dyed shirts of the girls next to me, which they tell me they made together last weekend. i feel it in the bold black Xs that mark each of my hands, the ones i swear i will not wash off until life does it for me, as a memory inked into my skin of whatever tonight will become. i can feel it as more and more people enter, packing the floor until i couldn’t possibly lose my spot if i tried, because there’s simply nowhere to go. we talk and people-watch and i try to work up the nerve to ask for that boy’s snapchat, the one who’s standing right in front of me and doesn’t deserve to look that good in a leather jacket. (spoiler: i never ask him. i’m brave enough to stand here by myself for the first time but i can’t work up the nerve to talk to a stranger i find vaguely attractive.)

the opener is neon. their matching shirts, their lights, even their name - “joywave” - is bright. their music is unexpected and bold and i’m hooked. they sing songs about the world falling apart at the seams and crack the obligatory marijuana jokes and demand to know how we live without oxygen. (this is colorado -  i’ve yet to see a band that doesn’t bring it up.) it feels right, like a perfect reflection of my world at this moment - falling apart and i just can’t quite bring myself to care. they make us laugh and mock the headliners (“their entire country is sea level. they’re fucked.”) i write this statement down in my phone for posterity’s sake and make a mental note to look them up later as they finish.

the waiting is agony. the crowd is tense, happy, impatient. i set a timer on my phone. my friend says it’ll be half an hour; i bet her it’ll only be fifteen minutes. everyone’s on edge, like the room is hovering just below boiling point and the slightest change will send us all into unrecoverable chaos. the volume spikes every time something moves onstage - a tech person removing a microphone, a shadow moving around behind the drum kit, even the flickering of a ceiling light sends one person into near-hysterics. i bounce on my toes. my friend pulls her hair back and demands to know what i can see. i give her a running commentary on the stage where nothing happens until she tells me to shut up. and we wait.

the dark is tension. there is no warning when the music ends mid-verse and the lights cut out, not row by row, but all at once. murmurs wind around me, whispers of people trying desperately to contain their excitement. i stop bouncing and shift to the side, so i can see the front through a gap in the people ahead of me. no one speaks, no one moves. for exactly three and a half seconds, i can see nothing but the outline of my best friend standing next to me. i can hear nothing at all. then, as if by magic, numbers appear on the stage, ticking down the seconds to midnight. at exactly 00:00, figures begin to move into view, towards keys and basses and drums and finally, after six months of waiting-

it is red and orange and blue, it is joy and warmth and moonlight. it is loud and electric and soft and real. kyle radiates energy, throws himself into every song, into every chord he plays. will tells stories and smirks, sings with his eyes closed and his heart open. woody is steady like the drums he plays, nodding to the beat, playing rhythms that resonate in my ears and chest. charlie flows, between songs, between instruments, like a river of motion that never ends. dan jumps and waves and sings and gives me a high five as he wanders through the crowd, and together they light my soul on fire.

i sing every word to every song until my throat is sandpapery. i smile so much the muscles in my face are stiff. i almost cry. (i do cry at the end.) i let the lights wash over me, reveling in the colors that dance across my eyes, wondering if this is the feeling that they meant when they said “fall into the night with you.” i lose myself in the music, in this dream come true, in the feeling that’s the closest i’ll ever come to heaven. i am somewhere between this world and a fictional bubble where the walls are made of music and the sky is a million lights. the only thing that helps me remember it’s real is that i can remember it in near-perfect detail. my brain could not possibly dream up the vibrations under my skin from the bass, couldn’t possibly conjure the images on the screen behind the band that bend and twist and melt into a burning city between each song.

when we finally emerge, the night is water. it’s cool on my skin, fresh and reviving, exactly what i need right now. i don’t want it. i want more bass, more songs, more dancing, more precious moments spent hovering somewhere between earth and heaven. i drink a snapple and lean my head against the car window. my friend drives. i turn my phone off, ignoring the messages demanding to be read and answered, choosing instead to prop my feet up on the console and dream of the next show, already counting down the days until i’ll be back. when i fall asleep, i dream of flames and flashing lights and waves crashing over my head, the last notes still ringing in my ears.

[nevaryadl]

subcagecorp for the otp+ thingy? 👀

 *lays down and gay weeps for an hour because i’m weak*

Do they share a hobby/special interest?Believe it or not, training. They all love learning new fighting styles and learning the finer ifs/hows/whys of other fighting styles.

Which one drives more? (if cars are inapplicable, who plans out how they get from place to place)Johnny drives more simply because he has the most experience, also he traveled a lot during the peak of his acting career so he’s got a good set of skills for long journeys.Which one is in charge of bills/finances?Kuai Liang is, he’s been in charge of the Lin Kuei finances for awhile and pretty good. Johnny, now that he’s not doing movies, has learned to do his own fiances and is decent at them and getting better at budgeting. Hanzo has only recently took back his life and needs gentle help from Kuai Liang and Johnny.Which one decorate the abode?They all share, it feels homey and comfy that way and also, as much as anyone wants to give shit to Johnny about his taste, he actually does have pretty good taste when it comes to home decor and comfiness vs class.Which one plans date nights?They all take turns but if they’re going out somewhere? Johnny. He’s usually got better lay of the land and he likes taking his gents out to the movies or good lowkey restaurants. 

Who steals the other(s) clothing?Kuai Liang does, followed by Hanzo. He’s shorter then both so chances are anything they have fits him and is super comfy to boot. Also Johnny doesn’t mind, he usually just asks that they put anything in the pockets where he can find them later, like his keys and phone.

Who makes the comfort snacks/meals when the other(s) are down?They all do, down to a T. They all learned so that if the other or others needed it then they could make it to start helping.Who needs to start the day with a kiss?Johnny and Hanzo. To them it just really starts their day out right and puts a pep to their step. Also for Hanzo it’s a gentle and pure physical assertion of adoration that doesn’t need words… also he’s just a big ol SMORCHER Who knows exactly how the other(s) take their drink?They sort of know? They try anyway. Johnny sucks at making tea so as much as he tries to make tea for Hanzo or Kuai Liang he kind of falls flat (nothing terrible just nothing great either). Hanzo and Kuai Liang do not have a lot of experience making coffee and usually rarely have the means too so they too will try but usually not make amazing coffee for Johnny. But they all love the thought and the effort!Who carefully keeps track of important dates to make super special outings?They all do, they love any excuse to smother the others in affection. Who uses nicknames/pet names more?Johnny all the way baby, he’s got them all. Sweet ones? Check. Tender ones? Check. Punny ones? Fucking Check. Hanzo and Kuai Liang love them all.

Which is the big spoon and which is the little spoon?Usually wherever they’re comfiest but Kuai Liang does love being the little spoon and Hanzo unwittingly big spoons a lot because he just finds the warmest body while he’s sleeping and octopuses around them.

Who (with permission) touches the booty when no one is looking?Kuai Liang and Hanzo if there’s no audience since Johnny is the tallest.Who’s more likely to crack a dirty joke?Johnny, mostly because he can work them into fire and ice puns and without fail can get Hanzo and Kuai Liang to blushWho texts the other ‘open your Snapchat in private’? (and then sends them goofy shit)Johnny does and then shares a pic of like the sky or some pretty flowers. Kuai LIang just takes him :I in response to everything for the rest of the day and Hanzo texts >:(Who’s more saucy when flirting?Johnny does but also because he’s just saucy in general, but sometimes Hanzo will surprise them and usually floor them.

Who is the Unstoppable Force who is the Immovable Object?Johnny is the unstoppable force and Hanzo is usually the immovable object. Kuai Liang just sits back and laughs.Who (lovingly) starts shit over food? (ie pineapple on pizza, mint ice cream)Kuai Liang bites ice cream and Hanzo and Johnny just stare in utter horror.Which one yells out meme refs?Johnny and Kuai Liang, too much time around the Kombat Kids, what can they say?Who does something goofy for the joke?Johnny is a goofball naturally, and also if there’s a chance to make Kuai Liang or Hanzo smile/laugh he’s gonna take it because he’s SO WEAK

[artificialqueens]

After The Glitter Fades, Chapter Three (Shalaska) - Citrus

A/N: two fics in the queue, on halloween no less? i couldn’t be more on-brand if i tried! this chapter has more smut because i am what? predictable.

-

Unlike many of the other coven rituals, Alaska was expressly not invited to attend their Samhain ritual.

“It’s not anything to do with you, baby,” Sharon had promised her when she broke the news, “It’s just… Samhain is an incredibly sacred night for witches, and especially our coven. We’ve never had an observer on Samhain.”

“I get it,” Alaska had answered, and Sharon had looked surprised at that answer. “It’s not for me to watch,” she continued, “It’s your thing. I totally, totally understand.”

Sharon had been delighted that Alaska wasn’t angry with her, especially after their fight. Alaska had even asked if Sharon minded whether she went to Courtney’s party early, and Sharon could meet her later on. This arrangement seemed to suit them both, and both women had left the conversation feeling excited about the upcoming holiday.

When the day came, Alaska and Sharon prepared very differently. Alaska spent the early evening making sure that her makeup was perfect and her costume wasn’t missing any crucial details. She arrived at Courtney’s in perfect time, bottle of peach schnapps in hand, and was greeted by friends who she hadn’t seen in far too many weeks.

Sharon spent her morning cleansing her apartment and meditating, preparing for the gruelling evening ahead of her. Samhain was never easy on her, and she needed all of the spiritual protection that she could possibly get. She dressed in her ritual clothing, reserved for Samhain now that they tended to do smaller rituals for other Sabbats, and washed her face; ritual makeup would come later. She arrived at the covenstead just before sunset and was greeted by her sisters, all wearing their ritual garments, some of them wearing tokens of their deities or loved ones.

Max put a hand on Sharon’s shoulder, smiling at her friend. “She’s already close,” she said softly. “I hardly need to call her, she’s so excited to see you.”

Sharon smiled back. “I’m excited to see her too.”

-

“Okay, when you told me about this costume idea, I didn’t expect you to show up looking like Lady Gaga’s lost fucking twin sister,” Courtney accused with a grin, straightening her halo. Alaska laughed, swirling her drink around in her glass and adjusting her jacket.

“You didn’t specify,” she drawled. “I worked with what I had.”

“You are such a liar, ” their friend Willam crowed, “You worked on this costume for like a month straight! I saw your Snapchats, dumbass.”

Alaska giggled. “I meant my face. The costume took way too much effort.”

“You do look like her,” Courtney admitted, “Your girlfriend is lucky.”

“What’s her name again?” Willam asked. “I forgot.”

Alaska smiled at the mere mention of her girlfriend, and it obviously didn’t escape their notice, but they remained quiet. “Her name’s Sharon,” she answered, setting her empty glass down and accepting the cracked can of cider that Courtney supplied her with.

“It seems like things are going well with her, then?” Court asked, happy to see Alaska so smitten.

“Yeah, I think so. I stay over at her place a lot, and her friends are really great. I miss you two, though.”

Willam leaned in excitedly. “I bet she’s gonna ask you to move in,” she said. Alaska bit her lip, surprised but pleased by Willam’s suggestion.

“I dunno, it’s only been a couple of months… But then again, that’s forever in lesbian time.”

Courtney grinned. “When are we gonna meet this mysterious Sharon anyway? I thought you were gonna drag her along tonight.”

“She’ll be here later,” Alaska promised. “She’s really devoted to her coven, and this is, like, a super special holiday for them. I promise you’ll get to meet her soon.”

“How hot is she, scale from one to ten?” Willam pried. “One is Courtney’s ex and ten is me, obviously.”

Alaska didn’t answer; none of them could stop laughing for long enough.

-

Samhain, Samhain, let the ritual begin,

We call upon our sacred ancestors to come in

Samhain, Samhain, we call upon our kin,

We call upon our dear departed loved ones to come in

The Veil between the worlds is thin

Our hearts reach cross the sea of time

To bring our loved ones in

Samhain, Samhain we honor all our kin

We honor those who’ve gone before

As the Great Wheel turns again

Sharon was overjoyed to be with her coven on her favorite night of the entire year, but there was another reason for her joy; the veil between life and death was at its thinnest on Samhain night, and Sharon knew this well.

They all helped toss wood onto the bonfire, some of the logs anointed with oils or herbs, and the Dianic witches built small altars to their goddesses around the large fire pit. Sharon brought out a small jar of ash from last year’s Samhain, anointing her sisters with the charred remains of their previous celebration before smearing it onto her own face as well. As the coven’s High Priestess, she was the one to light the bonfire, with a match and a few sheets of paper on which they had all written names of deceased loved ones whom they wished to honor.

The flames crackled in the middle at first, a small blaze, but soon climbed up the bone-dry logs, sending smoke billowing into the sky, sparks and ash fluttering in the wind like small spirits. The witches gathered around Max, surrounding their entire covenstead and backyard forest with a bubble of protection, and channelled all of their energy into her. Her lips parted, eyes rolling back into her skull as she began to shudder with the amount of energy surging through her, and Sharon squeezed her shoulder, making sure she remained grounded.

All of a sudden, Max’s hands shot out in front of her and she drew the shape of a door in bright white light, sending it away from her chest to fade into the night. She collapsed into her sisters’ waiting arms, accepting the potion that Fame pressed into her hands without question and downing it. The witches waited with bated breath, silently waiting for what they hoped would come.

Sharon’s eyes filled with tears as she felt a hand grasp hers, looking to her side to see her mother standing beside her. She fell into her arms with a soft cry of delight, squeezing her tight before pulling away.

“Mama…” she breathed, taking in the sight of a woman who had been dead for almost a decade. Her mother smiled.

“You look good, baby. Tell me all about this girl you’ve been seeing. Max tells me you’re pretty smitten,” she added, casting a glance at the recovering witch. Max smiled at her.

“Hello, Cassandra. It’s good to see you.”

Sharon’s mother grinned. “Well, I get to be corporeal one night a year, why not have fun?” she answered. “Sharon, baby, tell me everything.” Sharon sat in the grass with her mom, leaning into her embrace and letting Cassandra braid her hair as she told her all about Alaska, how the shop was thriving, how happy she was. The other witches were speaking with spirits of their own; animal spirits flocked around Pearl, listening to her spin stories, while Jinkx chatted quietly with her great-grandmother. Raja smoked lazily while she communed with a minor deity, Katya spoke in quick, practiced Russian with an ancestor, and Fame kept Max in her arms as she recovered from parting the veil.

“You sound like you’re really happy with this girl,” Cassandra said as she finished off Sharon’s braid. “I’m so glad.”

“I love her, Mom, I really do,” Sharon said. “I’m gonna ask her to move in with me tonight.”

“Tonight, huh? Not slaving over making Samhain perfect this year?” her mother teased her.

Sharon grinned. “Last year it had to be perfect because it was the first Samhain we celebrated at Supernature ,” she answered. “Alaska and I compromised, and I’m going to meet her friends at a Halloween party after this.”

“That’s my girl,” Cassandra smiled, “My little spook. Am I going to get to meet this Alaska?”

Sharon’s eyes widened. “You want to?”

“Of course I do, Sharon. I may not be around on Earth anymore, but I can tell how happy you are. I’d like to meet her before next year’s Samhain.”

Sharon nodded slowly. “Okay. I’ll take you.”

-

“There’s something about that name that’s very familiar to me, you know,” Cassandra mused as Sharon changed into her Halloween costume. “I swear I knew an Alaska when I was alive…”

Sharon rolled her eyes at her mother’s ghost. “I doubt you knew her, she’s younger than I am.”

“What’s her family name?” Cassandra asked. Sharon snorted out a laugh.

“Thunderfuck, believe it or not. She says it’s European or something.”

Cassandra smiled triumphantly. “That’s it! Elsie Thunderfuck.”

“Alaska, Mom. Her name is Alaska.” Cassandra rolled her eyes.

“No, Shar-bear, her grandmother’s name is Eloise, we called her Elsie. I knew her, back when I was… y’know. Alive.”

Sharon paused, eyeliner brush hovering inches from her face. “What?”

Cassandra shrugged. “We worked in the same circles for a while. She was always very wise back then, I’m sure she taught her granddaughter well.”

“Alaska never knew who she got her magickal blood from,” Sharon breathed, eyes wide as she faced her mother. “We knew that it was there because she had that spark, but… We never knew who. ”

“Well, now you know,” Cassandra chuckled. “I don’t suppose she’s ever attempted to contact any spirits before, has she? Are you sure this’ll work?”

Sharon rolled her eyes. “It’ll work, Mom. She’s really intuitive, and she was already somewhat spiritual before we met. She’ll love you.”

When they got to the party, the door was opened by none other than Alaska, drink in hand and smiling. Her smile widened when she saw Sharon, then faltered when she saw that Sharon hadn’t come alone. Sharon took her girlfriend’s hand with a smile, leading her outside onto Courtney’s porch and sitting them both down on the bench, Cassandra sitting opposite them.

“Baby, this is gonna sound crazy, but please just bear with me… This is Cassandra. My mother.”

Alaska’s gaze flickered between the two women as her teeth worried her lower lip. “Your… Sharon, I thought your mom was…”

“Dead?” Cassandra finished for her. When Alaska gave a small nod, she smiled. “Well, believe it or not, I am.”

“On Samhain night, the veil between worlds is at its thinnest,” Sharon explained. “Our world is closer to the spirit world tonight than it is at any other part of the year. It’s easiest to make connections through the veil, and a lot of us do… Even non-witches are somewhat more aware of spiritual presences on Samhain.”

“It’s the one night a year that I can make my corporeal presence known here on Earth,” Cassandra said, squeezing Sharon’s hand. “Sharon can reach out to me whenever she wants, but this is the one night that I can be present with my daughter, just for a few hours.”

“That… makes a weird amount of sense,” Alaska admitted, breaking her respectful silence. ��Like, I should definitely be more freaked out about this than I am, but then again, I’m dating Sharon, and she does a lot of freaky shit. Oops,” she added, blushing bright pink and making Sharon laugh.

“She knows, pumpkin. I brought her along because she wanted to meet you.”

“I wanted to see the woman who’s been making my little girl so happy,” Cassandra smiled, reaching out to take Alaska’s hand in her own. “Oh my, she’s been teaching you well. Your aura is positively glowing, and you’re radiating with energy.”

“God, you really are just like your mother,” Alaska giggled, leaning over to give Sharon a peck on the cheek. Sharon sighed happily and pulled her closer, letting Alaska snuggle into her side.

“So, Alaska… How did you two meet?”

The three of them spoke for almost two hours, not paying any attention to the few partygoers who would come outside for a smoke or a breath of fresh air. Alaska leaned into Sharon’s side as she told Cassandra the story of how they’d met, how Sharon had wooed her, and how happy they made each other. Sharon’s heart was so full that she thought she might burst; not only were her girlfriend and her mother both here with her, but they were getting along incredibly well, even better than she could have hoped.

As it got later and later, Alaska snuggled closer into Sharon, happy to just listen to her talk to her mother. She blushed when Sharon gushed about her and how much she loved her, a little shy now that Cassandra’s attention was no longer on her. She exuded a calming energy, almost seeming to radiate wisdom and kindness, and Alaska liked watching the way she interacted with her daughter, who was much more… chaotic. Cassandra never let go of Sharon’s hand, not even once, and it was clear that Sharon desperately wanted the contact between them to last as long as possible.

“My love, it’s getting late…” Cassandra ventured. Sharon’s expression changed from one of contentment to one of resigned sadness. She nodded wordlessly, pulling away from Alaska with a kiss to her girlfriend’s forehead.

“I’ll be back in just a second, baby… This is something I’d rather do alone.”

Alaska smiled, pulling her jacket tighter around herself. “Go, Shar. I’ll wait for you. Tell your mama I was happy to meet her.” Sharon smiled back, following her mother down the porch steps and stepping out to the curb.

Cassandra took both of Sharon’s hands in her own, staring into her daughter’s eyes. “You know how this goes,” she said with a sad smile. “I have other people to visit tonight, even if it’s just for a moment. If I could, I’d spend every single second with you, but… You’re not on your own like you were when you were younger. You have the coven, and now you have Alaska.”

“None of them are you, Mama. I’ll still miss you just as much.”

“I know you will, sweetheart. I’ll miss you too, I always do. But I’ll be with you always, even when I’m not physically here.” She hugged Sharon, and Sharon hugged her back tight, never wanting to let go.

“I love you,” she whispered, trying not to cry. “This never gets fucking easier.”

“I love you too, baby girl,” Cassandra replied, pulling away from their embrace and pressing a soft kiss to her daughter’s hair. “I am so, so proud of you. Blessed be, my Sharon. You’ll see me again soon.”

“Blessed be,” Sharon echoed, smiling despite her voice being thick with tears. “Til next time, Mama.”

With one last grin at her daughter, Cassandra walked away from the house, her image fading away with each step she took. The moment she was gone, Sharon felt a hand slip into her own, and turned to find Alaska at her side. Alaska offered a smile and a soft kiss against her lips, brushing a lock of hair away from Sharon’s face.

“You okay?”

Sharon nodded. “I’m okay. I just needed a moment to say goodbye… It’s hard to wait a year, but I know some people aren’t as lucky as I am. I don’t think I’d be half as okay as I am if I never saw her again, y’know?”

“God, yeah, I can’t imagine,” Alaska answered. “You think you’re up to coming inside and saying hi to some friends? They really wanna meet you, but we can go home if you’re feeling drained.” Sharon’s heart swelled; Alaska was so attentive and cared for her so deeply, and she was still in awe that she had such a perfect lover.

“You’re sweet.” Sharon nuzzled Alaska’s neck tenderly, nipping at her jaw to make her squeak in surprise. “I’m good, promise. I’d love to meet your friends, angel.”

As soon as they walked in the door, they were greeted by a very excited Courtney and Willam, both of them more than a bit tipsy and holding hands.

“Lasky! We’ve been looking for you everywhere!”

“Almost thought you’d abandoned us to get some tail,” Willam snickered, looking pleased with herself when Courtney laughed at the obvious reference to Willam’s mermaid costume. Alaska giggled and leaned into Sharon’s side.

“This is Sharon. Sharon, these two idiots are my best friends, Courtney and Willam.”

“It’s so nice to finally meet you! We’ve heard a lot about you.”

“All bad, I hope,” Sharon teased, pulling Lasky closer by the waist. “You’re both gorgeous, by the way. Love the costumes.”

“Your girlfriend outdid us all,” Willam grinned. “Fuckin’ overachiever. Always has to be the best.”

“That’s not true!” Alaska whined, pouting when Sharon shrugged her agreement with Willam. “Hey, you’re supposed to be on my side!”

“C’mon, come get some drinks and we can chat,” Courtney urged. “I wanna get to know Alaska’s dream girl!” Alaska blushed, but followed her friends nonetheless, allowing Sharon to guide her with a strong yet gentle arm around her waist.

Despite it coinciding with a sacred witchcraft holiday that meant a lot to her, Halloween was still Sharon’s favorite day of the year. She loved that she was able to balance her craft with her favorite spooky time of year; she’d been with her coven and go to a party with her girlfriend, and she was happy to be able to share the night with all of the people she loved most.

Alaska’s friends were both very sweet, and she found it surprisingly refreshing to hang out with people who had absolutely no knowledge of witchcraft; it really did consume her life sometimes, along with a good number of her friendships, and she thought to herself that maybe she should find more people like Courtney and Willam. She definitely vibed better with Willam, feeling a spark between them that was promising, but she genuinely really liked Courtney too, and was glad that Alaska had such incredible friends.

As it got later and later, Alaska seemed to want to be closer to Sharon, getting cuddly and speaking less, and Sharon knew that it was time to go home. They said their goodbyes and promised to hang out again soon, and Sharon’s stomach filled with butterflies the moment that she and Alaska got into her car to go back to Sharon’s apartment.

Luckily for Sharon, Alaska already seemed to have a plan for the evening in mind, and Sharon found herself pinned against her front door almost the moment that it closed behind them, Alaska’s lips on hers and Alaska’s hands on her waist. She kissed back, smiling a little at her girlfriend’s eagerness, and stifled a moan when Alaska’s lips moved south to suck a hickey into her neck.

“Mmm, baby, there’s no rush,” she chuckled as Alaska’s hands roamed over her body, feeling her curves and squeezing her ass lightly. “C’mon, let’s get out of these costumes. We have all the time in the world.”

They made their way to Sharon’s bedroom, where their outfits were discarded, Sharon’s tossed over a chair with abandon and Alaska’s folded neatly because, well, she was Alaska. Sharon was quick to wipe the makeup off her face, standing in front of the mirror in only her underwear and scrubbing away the remnants of Vampira. Alaska approached her from behind, nude and fresh-faced, winding her arms around Sharon’s middle and nuzzling her neck sweetly, and Sharon’s heart swelled. Goddess, she was so in love with her.

“You gonna stand there all night, or are you gonna come to bed?” Alaska teased, wiggling her hips against Sharon’s backside. Sharon laughed and turned around to face her, stealing a soft kiss before pushing her away.

“Go pick a toy, you horny bitch,” she teased back. “Your favorite one, go get it.”

“Favorite to give or favorite to take?” Alaska asked with a glimmer in her eye. Sharon snorted.

“You really think I’m gonna let you top on Halloween, Thighs?”

Alaska laughed and turned away to look through their toy drawer, giving Sharon a lovely- and obviously intentional- view of her ass as she did so. Once Sharon’s face was clean of makeup, she moved to get on the bed, giving Alaska a light spank and snickering at the squeal that followed. The strap-on was left on the nightstand alongside a bottle of lube and a few other toys that Alaska was clearly hoping would be used that night, and Alaska joined her girlfriend on the bed, pushing Sharon against the mattress to kiss her deeply.

“You looked so hot tonight,” she murmured against Sharon’s lips, straddling her thigh. “I couldn’t say anything in front of your mom or my friends, but you’re so fucking sexy… I kinda wanted you to take me into the bathroom and fuck me there, just fast enough to leave me wanting more of you…”

Sharon smirked. “I would’ve liked to see you all desperate like that. Those little shorts you were wearing, Lasky? Sinful. You fucking tease.”

“They’re screen accurate,” Alaska whined as Sharon flipped their positions so that she could be on top. “I’m glad they worked, though… I love having you take control of me like this. Fucking love it.”

“I know you do,” Sharon teased, leaning down to kiss Alaska’s neck and hear her soft, needy moans. “Picking out all those toys… I hate to disappoint you, but we’re not gonna use them tonight.”

Alaska pouted, but she couldn’t keep it up for long with Sharon’s left hand on her breast and her right hand squeezing her thigh. “Why not?” she whined, soft and needy as Sharon leaned down to lick at her nipple and gasping at the sensation. Sharon hummed, sucking lightly at Alaska’s delicate skin before pulling away.

“I don’t wanna use toys tonight, other than the dick. I don’t wanna tease you, I just wanna worship you and make you feel good. I wanna make love to you, baby.” Alaska let out a soft noise, eyes dark with arousal, and she bit her lip.

“I… I like that,” she admitted in little more than a whisper. “I love you, you know that right?”

“Of course I do,” Sharon replied, spreading Alaska’s thighs apart and dipping a finger between her folds. “I love you so fucking much, Lasky.” Her finger stroked Alaska lightly, feeling how wet she was, how much she wanted her. She was so needy, letting out a little moan when Sharon’s mouth began working over her chest again as she continued to tease her lightly. She added a second finger to her gentle exploration, fingertips sliding over Alaska’s clit and causing her to gasp, hands moving to tangle in Sharon’s hair as the witch kissed down her stomach.

Alaska shifted her position slightly, spreading her legs and offering up her pussy to Sharon with dark eyes. She bit back a smile when Sharon took a moment to throw her hair into a ponytail, but the smile disappeared in a gasp of pleasure as Sharon’s tongue swirled over her pussy.

“ Oh… Oh, Sharon… ”

Sharon was slow and methodical as she ate Alaska out, alternating between light, teasing flicks to her clit and long, full licks against her entire pussy, her arms wrapped around Alaska’s thighs to keep her close. She would usually tease more, building Alaska up only to pull away and watch her whine and beg, but she wanted to be good to her tonight, wanted to see her experience true pleasure. When Alaska came for the first time, her hands tightened in Sharon’s hair and her thighs shook around her head, her pouty lips parted as she moaned and gasped her lover’s name, back arching off the bed. As she came down, Sharon pulled herself up to lay beside her, stroking nonsensical patterns into Lasky’s soft tummy as she relaxed again.

Alaska pulled Sharon in very suddenly to give her a deep, sensual kiss, pulling away only when she was satisfied that she’d made Sharon flush just a little. “Thank you,” she murmured, a sweet, coy smile pulling at her lips. “Fuck, that was so good. You’re so good to me.”

“That’s not all you’re getting tonight, baby,” Sharon promised, slipping out of her lingerie and into the strap-on harness. Alaska blushed at the sight of her girlfriend looking so sexy and confident as she lubed up the long blue cock between her legs, and pulled her down for another kiss.

“You wanted to make love to me?” she breathed against Sharon’s lips, wrapping her legs around her hips. “Make love to me, Sharon.”

Sharon didn’t need to be told twice; she slid into Alaska slowly, kissing every inch of skin she could reach until she was fully sheathed inside her girlfriend. When she started moving, Alaska let out a whimper; Sharon’s thrusts were slow yet deep, just hard enough to make Lasky moan with each one and grip the sheets. She kept her pace the same for the entire time that she fucked Alaska, slow and tender, until the blonde beneath her was a flushed, panting, squirming mess. When she warned Sharon that she was going to come, her voice was barely more than a rough, low moan, and she held onto Sharon tightly as she slipped away into bliss.

This was the moment. Alaska was dreamy, floating on a cloud of post-orgasmic pleasure, and Sharon pulled out gently to lay by her side once more.

“Lasky?” she ventured, lacing their fingers together.

“Mmm?”

“I want you to move in with me.”

Alaska was quiet for a moment, then rolled onto her side to face Sharon, eyes soft and bright. “Yeah?”

Sharon nodded. “Yeah. I want this every day. I wanna go to sleep with you at night and wake up with you in the morning, and I wanna hear you sing in the shower and complain that I leave my stuff everywhere, and I want to make love to you every single night.”

Alaska blinked back tears, closing in for a soft kiss. “I want that too.”

“Really? You… You’ll move in with me?”

Alaska laughed and nodded, giving Sharon another kiss.

“Yeah, Noodles. I will.”

[sasorikigai]

Send me a “📱” and I will answer the following: || @pxlariis || accepting

What was my muses 5 last sent texts yours?

[ to: Frost ] Kuai Liang informed me that you have strong inclinations towards astronomy.

[ to: Frost ] I always used to believe stars were lies and they were too far to reach when I was young. Now they serve as my guidance, the very things that direct me without ever giving up.

[ to: Frost ] Perhaps we can observe the night sky when it’s cloudless and clear.

[ to: Frost ] I'll teach some I know, and vice versa. 

[ to: Frost ] Who knows, my tolerance towards you will develop into something more if I make a conscious effort to know you further. 

What was my muses 5 last unsent texts yours.?

[ to: Frost ] Unintentionally, I happened to pass the old cemetery where you attempted to attack me. 

[ to: Frost ] It isn’t the cold air that makes me feel chills. It is thinking about what you tried to do as I desperately try to understand in your perspective.

[ to: Frost ] I still don’t know, what did I ever do to you to earn so much of your hate at that time?

[ to: Frost ] I never forget, nor forgive. Damn my conscious and sharp psyche that recalls everything in painful recollections. 

[ to: Frost ] If I knew you more in depth, then perhaps I will forgive you. 

What was my muses last snapchat to yours?

Hanzo doesn’t have a snapchat, but if he did, it would be of Hanzo demonstrating a specific skill that may be relevant to Frost’s cryomancy. 

What my muse saved your number as?

Frost, for now. It’s subject to change as their relationship progresses.

What contact photo my muse has set for yours?

What ringtone my muse has set for yours?

Default (for now).

How many times my muse has called your this week?

A few times, just to confirm their meeting time and place (between the Shirai Ryu Fire Gardens and The Lin Kuei Temple, obviously), as Hanzo much prefers meeting people in-person than calling them, unless it is absolutely necessary and in emergency situations. 

How many calls has my muse missed from yours?

None. 

[crrvsh-blog]

*arrives 15 minutes late with a tag dump*

[skizmin]

May I request 8, 13, and 39 from the Stray Kids Drabble List with Chan? I've seen your works and I love them so much!

Drabble Game! Chan

Prompt: 8 How do you tell someone you’re so deeply in love with them that your heart aches in a good way? 13 The truth comes out always 39 Those three words mean a lot more to me than you’d think, so don’t throw them around so casually.

Genre: fluff, angst, a bit of everything waiT NOT SMUT. best friend quadruple with you jisung chan and minho. not gender specific as per usual

“Jisung get your fucking shoes away from the fire!” Minho was screaming at Jisung every 5 seconds.

It wasn’t like he didn’t normally scream at Jisung this often but you guessed it was more noticeable because you were camping in the middle of nowhere, it should be tranquil. Nothing but soft conversations and the sounds of insects calling to each other should be heard but-

“They’re wet Minho! I’m fucking drying them!” 

You sighed. This was gonna be a long trip.

Chan spoke with Jisung and Minho in hushed tones as you rummaged through some bags by the car (”If you forgot the Marshmallows I swear to god”).

“One of you room with them!” Chan whispered harshly, staring incredulously at the boys.

“But you’re closer with them? Plus Minho has some tea to tell me, so I’m not switching.” Jisung straightens, tilting his chin up as Minho nods enthusiastically by his side.

“Oh come on, it’s just for sleeping! It’s two nights! You can talk shit during the day!”

“Exactly!” Minho stepped ahead of Jisung. “It’s just for sleeping and only two nights! Why’re you so against sharing a tent with them?”

Chan spluttered, caught in the act. “I-I don’t know! It’s just- I just, I- Ugh!”

“Just tell us! Oh god it’s not like we’ll tell them.” Jisung piped up, slumping his shoulders and letting out a huff.

“I can’t!”

“Don’t be a pussy, hyung.” Minho replied.

“I’m not-”

“You are!” From Jisung.

“Hey! Do-”

“Just tell us-!”

“I’m in love with them!”

Chan’s eyes widened and he frantically looked back to find you still rummaging through the abundance of bags in the boot of the car. 

“Finally, jesus, we thought you’d never tell us.” Jisung sighed, looking up at a Minho who wasn’t phased by Chan’s sudden confession at all.

“Well, Chan-hyung, isn’t that just more of a reason to room with them?” Minho let out a soft smirk, leaving Chan dumbfounded as he gripped Jisung’s bicep and pulled him towards where you were searching for the Marshmallows. 

Jisung whispered as he passed Chan, suddenly feeling immune to his superiority because of his power holding this secret.

“The truth comes out, always.”

Chan was fucked.

Australia was harsh, you learnt, as you explored with Jisung. Chan and Minho wanted to set up the tents themselves, saying you and Jisung would only distract them and accidentally ruin them. You had only been out of your small camp clearing for 10 minutes when you fell, chasing Jisung through the thick bush trying to find the billabong you knew was around here somewhere.

You yelped and hissed, falling down a steep 2 metre cliff. The instant sharp pains in your ankle and the blood trailing down your arm was enough to make you panic. Jisung decided to get the others for help once you immediately collapsed after reaching to get up on the small grassy ledge, the pain in your ankle becoming too much.

You estimated it was 20 minutes until Jisung and the other two found you again.

“Y/N?!” Chan immediately jumped down the small cliff, gripping your shoulders and checking for serious injuries. Your eyes were wet with tears of frustration as you let him haul you upwards and into his chest.

“Minho, Jisung, get ready to grab them okay?” Chan struggled as he lifted you by your hips, Minho and Jisung dragging you to the ledge, allowing Chan to simply push your legs to help you up more before planting his hands on the grassy surface, lodging his foot in the pale dirt of the cliff and throwing his torso over the top off it.

On the way back, you were on Chan’s back, Minho behind him steadying his every step and Jisung ahead, leading you all the the camp.

“I’m sorry.” You muttered, guilt eating away at you.

“You don’t need to be sorry Y/N, for the billionth time.” Chan sighed, hoisting you up further on his back as the clearing you inhabited came into sight. “Jisung shouldn’t have left you alone.”

“What? How else would I have gotten help?” Jisung said, dumping his backpack onto the ground next to a half finished tent.

“I don’t know, called for it maybe?” Chan huffed, and you buried you face into his shoulder, not wanting to be apart of this conversation. 

“I would’ve been yelling for ages before you or Minho heard me!” Jisung exclaimed, watching Chan carefully lower you down into a camping chair.

“Well losing your voice sure is better than leaving Y/N alone in the middle of the Australian bush in summer, might I add.” Chan didn’t look away from your ankle as he dragged another chair in front of you to prop it up onto.

“That’s bu-” Jisung was cut off by a done looking Minho.

“Cut it out, Y/N didn’t get eaten. Jisung, come and help me finish the last tent.”

Minho gripped Jisung’s wrist and dragged him off to the tents that were side by side, Jisung mumbling under his breath what you could only assume to be a string of profanity.

Chan sighed, walking over to the car to retrieve a small backpack off basic first aid supplies.

He crouched down in front of you, accidentally bumping the chair your ankle was resting on. You unknowingly let out a small wince.

“Sorry.” He muttered. You didn’t know if it was to you or not. You shook your head.

“You shouldn’t have yelled at Jisung you know.”

“I didn’t yell at him.” Chan grunted, digging his hand through the backpack only to pull out some disinfectant wipes from it.

“You know what I mean.” You sighed, he was still refusing to look up at you.

“He left you there. I can’t even count how many poisonous snakes there are there, not to mention freshwater crocodiles and- and spiders and literally every other deadly thing-”

“Chan, I’m fine. Nothing would’ve happened.”

“You don’t know that, I don’t either, neither does Jisung and-” He rubbed the wipe over your arm and left hand, cleaning the blood off of you.

“Chan!”

He looked up finally, his eyes vulnerable.

“I’m sorry. It’s just, I love you. I don’t want anything to hurt you.”

You’d be lying if you said your heart skipped a beat, if you said you hadn’t been wanting this for years. But your guards went up, he didn’t mean it like that anyway.

“Those three words mean a lot more to me than you’d think, so don’t throw them around so casually.” You sighed, grabbing the wet tissue from his hand. You continued to clean your arm under his gaze.

“Casually? What do you mean casually?” Chan’s eyebrows were furrowed, his heart painfully clenching.

“The way you said it, it was insincere.” You continued to scrub at the scrapes on your arm.

Chan sighed, tilting his head back to look at the almost dark sky.

“How do I say it sincerely, then?” 

“What?” You asked, flicking your eyes towards Chan.

“Tell me. How do you tell someone you’re so deeply in love with them that your heart aches in a good way? How?”

You choked on your breath, your heart beating faster than you think it ever has. Heat rising steadily to your cheeks and your stomach doing backflips.

“I-I dont-”

“Can I kiss you?” He says, finally meeting your eyes. Hope gleaming throughout them.

“I-You- But.” You breathed in deeply, this couldn’t be happening. “Yes, Chan. For gods sake, yes!”

(”Ow! Fuck! Watch the ankle there!” “Shit sorry!”)

(”Minho how many people am I sending this picture of them making out to?” “Why would you waste time sending it when you can post it on Instagram, Twitter and Snapchat?”)

//

Hope you liked it!!