#(caption is a joke just in case)

[faceglitchsworld]

Aniteez exploring the r-OH MY GOD IS THIS TREASURE MV'S SET?! 😱

[absolutely-existing]

absolutely WILD to me that people will just follow me after we’ve had one (1) interaction. like you’re not even gonna scroll through my blog??

[astranauticus]

A thrilling and horrific tale of 5 strangers caught up in a mysterious supernatural conspiracy, will they uncover the secrets of the peculiar artefact bestowed upon them or will they fall to what lurks in the shadows? Find out in Curse of the Amulet, coming to a theatre (heh) near you this Halloween season!

[nonexistent-tales]

[video]

sighs (captions)

[lorawant2sleep]

baked perfect ｡٭’☆blini｡･:*⚹

#slaviccore #traditional life #housewife

[connormoving]

got an annoying blaze and i was like Sigh. its probably just some annoying kid ill just go block and be done with it (which is what i do everytime i see any blazed post) and then i go to the blog to block and theyre a millenial. why the fuck are you 28 years old MINIMUM and being this fucking annoying

[cameronsbabydoll]

no cause scc!reader probably when her kids are older she starts like a cute etsy business and her kids help her and she’s so proud of herself and scc!rafe sees it and he sorta takes over trying to get people to invest and she’s just like “rafe is an etsy business”… here’s how it goes (ib: @rafeslittlepup)

she’s just trying to make her little handmade things—hair bows, custom recipe cards, vintage-inspired aprons—and she’s so proud of it, shipping them off in pink bubble mailers with dried flower confetti and hand-written thank you notes. it’s her soft little world, her cute side thing now that the house is quieter and the kids are older.

she’s working out of the sunroom, tea steaming beside her, favorite candle lit, typing out Etsy captions like:

“perfect for slow mornings 🌸 handmade with love 💌”

and the kids help her take pictures, package orders, even run the post office errands. her daughter helps her with aesthetic reels, her eldest son built her a little website (“just in case it blows up, mom”), and the baby boy makes stickers that say “made with love by mom.”

but then scc!rafe finds out it’s doing numbers.

and suddenly he’s pacing in the living room shirtless with glasses on, saying things like:

“you know if we brand this right we could scale. licensing deals, bulk production—baby, you’re sitting on a goldmine.”

and she’s just like 🧍‍♀️ sipping her iced matcha like

“rafe. it’s an etsy shop.”

and he doesn’t get it.

he’s running numbers, calling his lawyer, half-joking about putting it under a shell corp. meanwhile she’s just trying to make crochet mug sleeves for fall 😭

but deep down?? he’s so proud of her.

he orders from her shop using a fake name just to leave 5-star reviews.

he makes their daughter wear the bows out in public.

he gets a little shelf made for her “office” and calls it “headquarters.”

and when she hits her 1,000th sale he buys her 1,000 flowers and says,

“not bad for a housewife.”

with a smirk.

but then kisses her forehead like she just closed a million-dollar deal.

[dearstvckyx]

headcanons — john walker x reader / how he loves after being left. (sfw & nsfw)

A/N: omg guys my first time writing nsfw theme

sfw:

He doesn’t want to open up at first. He makes some offhand, self-deprecating joke — “You don’t want to deal with this mess, sweetheart” — but there’s fear behind it. Like he’s daring you to leave too.

Love, to him, looks like acts of service. Fixing your broken cabinet. Keeping your tires filled. Cleaning your headlights. He doesn’t say “I love you” often — but your coffee’s always made, and he memorizes your schedule like it’s a mission briefing.

He leaves the bed sometimes, haunted by things he doesn’t name. You find him on the couch at 3AM, blanket half-fallen off. You start joining him there without a word. Eventually, he starts staying in bed more.

Compliments don’t come easy. “You’re gonna give me a heart atta— I mean, you look good.” He stumbles through the words like they’re live grenades. But the pink in his ears gives him away every time.

Forehead kisses. Always gentle. Always meaningful. When you’re sick. When you’ve had a long day. When he’s just happy you’re still here.

With you, he’s not U.S. Agent. Not a soldier. Not some broken weapon. He’s just John. And slowly, he starts liking who that is.

He used to laugh off therapy. Now, he’ll quietly bring it up. “My therapist said somethin’ like that last week.” And he listens better now — to you, to himself.

There’s a photo of you in his wallet. Tucked behind an old picture of his parents and Lamar. When you find it, he just says, “You’re family now,” and looks away before his voice can crack.

He always pretends he doesn’t care about birthdays — but on yours, he goes all out. Wrapped presents, handwritten card, a store-bought cake that somehow still feels personal.

He’s weirdly formal around your friends. “Nice to meet you, ma’am.” You tease him for it, but deep down, he just doesn’t want to embarrass you. He wants to be enough.

There’s a chipped mug you love, and he always saves it for you. It’s the first thing he washes, every time. “It’s your mug,” he says, like it’s obvious.

If you fall asleep on the couch, he doesn’t wake you. Just lowers the volume and adjusts the blanket like it’s the most important job he’s ever had.

He can’t flirt to save his life. “You got… strong handwriting.” It’s awkward. It’s endearing. It’s real.

“Darlin’” slips out when he’s tired or distracted. Then he’ll pretend he didn’t say it. Like it wasn’t the softest thing you’ve heard all day.

He’s not big on texting. But he sends photos: your mug next to his, your shoes by the door, the sky at sunset when on a mission with the new avengerz. No captions. Just “thought of you.”

You have a drawer at his place. Full of your favorite snacks, that lotion you like, fuzzy socks you only wore once. “Just in case,” he mutters.

He doesn’t know how to handle affection. You touch his face and he closes his eyes like it’s too much. But he never pulls away.

When he’s proud of you, he doesn’t yell or post about it. He wraps you up in his arms and says, “You did good, baby.” Quiet and low. Like it means everything.

NSFW

At first he’s hesitant to be…. Well meaner. He doesn’t want to hurt you, especially with him being a super soldier at that. He’ll be slow and soft, gentle, only fuck in one position: Missionary.

And in the beginning: he won’t let you suck him off, he won’t talk dirty to you, won’t use toys or anything on you. He’s just very vanilla and soft in the beginning.

You would have to repeatedly tell him or beg him to be a tad bit rougher. And when he gets rougher…. he gets rougher.

He’ll fuck like he’s staking a claim — hips snapping hard, hands gripping your thighs, jaw clenched tight as he watches you take every rough inch. He’s got that look like he’s damn well owning you in this moment.

His voice drops low and rough, full of command and hunger: “Take it. That’s it, sweetheart. Let me fuck you open just like that.” You will obey. He won’t take no for an answer.

He lives for your begging. Fingers teasing slow, tongue just grazing your sensitive spots — “Say it. Tell me you want it.” When you finally beg, he grins like a predator ready to pounce.

His fingers curl inside you, thick and relentless, whispering in your ear, “This pussy’s mine, huh? So fuckin’ wet for me.” He’s brutal but worshipful all at once.

Hearing you moan his name drives him wild. Especially when you’re face-down, gasping into the pillow, one hand tangled in your hair, the other locking your hip in place like he won’t let you go.

He’s rough but never careless. Slaps your ass hard enough to sting, grips your neck just right to make your eyes flutter. If you flinch or twitch, he pulls back, kisses your neck, and murmurs, “Color, baby?”

Making you cum over and over is his favorite game. Whether on his tongue, fingers, or cock — he commands, “Again. You’re not done ‘til I say so.” You’re addicted to that rough mercy.

Every time he slides into you, he grunts and groans like it’s the best damn feeling in the world. “Fuck, this pussy’s so tight. So fuckin’ wet for me.” His voice is ragged, hungry, completely undone by you.

When he comes, he growls your name and buries himself deep, holding you tight like you’re the only thing that keeps him grounded. Panting, forehead pressed against your skin, utterly wrecked.

After the storm, he switches to softness — cleaning you up gently, holding you close, whispering “Mine,” like it’s a promise and a prayer.

He loves it when you ride him — watching you bounce with that fierce look, hands on your hips, moaning low. “Fuck, darlin’, you’re so damn pretty when you take me like this.”

Praise turns him to putty. Call him good. Tell him how deep he feels. Say “You’re mine, John.” He grips you tighter and murmurs, “Say it again.”

He’ll hold your wrists lightly but firmly to the bed, eyes locked on yours, growling, “Stay still, baby. Let me fuck you right.”

His dirty talk is a mix of rough commands and desperate worship — “So tight… so wet… just for me. You’re mine, always.”

Oh and this man definitely has a Sir kink or a Captain kink. Call him one of those and he’s readjusting y’all’s position to go rougher.

Aftercare

As soon as it’s over, he goes quiet. Not because he’s checked out — but because he’s trying to come down. His chest is heaving, his arms are shaking, and all he wants is you. He doesn’t even pull out right away, just buries his face in your neck and holds you like he’s anchoring himself to the earth.

“You okay?” His voice is low and raw. He always asks, every single time. Even if you’re blissed out and boneless, even if he was watching your every reaction — he needs to hear it from you. “Too much? Did I go too far?”

He strokes your skin like it’s fragile. Big, rough hands gliding gently over your hips, your back, your thighs. “You did so good, baby,” he murmurs, lips brushing your temple. “So fuckin’ good for me.”

Clean-up is sacred. He always gets up (sometimes still naked, hair wild, cock still half-hard) to grab a towel and some water. Gently cleans you between the legs, peppering soft kisses to your knees and thighs while he does. “I got you,” he says, again and again.

He puts you in one of his shirts. Usually the one he was wearing earlier — worn and warm, still smelling like cologne and sweat and him. Helps you into it slowly, smoothing your hair back, stealing one last kiss.

Then he pulls you into his chest. Covers you both with the blanket, arms snug around your waist, your face tucked under his chin. His heartbeat is heavy and real under your palm. “You’re everything, y’know that?”

He whispers little things. Not always “I love you” — sometimes it’s “You saved me,” or “Never thought I’d have this again,” or “Don’t know what I did to deserve you.” Raw, grateful, John.

If it was rougher, he runs his hands down your body and checks you over gently. Rubs your wrists if he held them. Kisses any red marks. “I shouldn’t’ve gripped that hard,” he mumbles. “You tell me if I ever overdo it, okay?”

He won’t fall asleep until you do. Even if his eyes are closing, he stays awake, watching your breathing slow, fingers tracing lazy circles on your skin. He won’t leave you floating alone in that post-high haze — he grounds you, anchors you, brings you home.

[tinycoffeeroom]

you and i | lando norris

face claim: bela juliana ♡

request: here !

pairing: lando norris x leclerc!reader

requested: Can I request a social media AU leclerc reader x lando based off of the song ‘You and I’ by Rita Ora Thanks so muchhhhh

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liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris and 679,154 others

y/nleclerc oh to be the girl someone writes love stories about

fan I WILL!!!!! give me 10 minutes and garage band i can pull it off!!! ♥️ y/nleclerc

alexandrasaintmleux every love song is about you gorgeous girl x ↳ y/nleclerc when are you gonna stop pretending you like my brother and just date me instead x ↳ charles_leclerc ?? rude.

landonorris d4vd is so good! can't wait for his show in london :)

lewishamilton pipe is right there 😉 ↳ y/nleclerc that is NOT a love song sir lewis hamilton!!!! ↳ charles_leclerc back off grandpa i will put sand in your petrol tank ↳ lewishamilton woah calm down there bud i was joking i promise ↳ y/nleclerc play nice boys ↳ charles_leclerc he started it ↳ y/nleclerc well stop, i dont want ferrari in my dm's telling me y'all are throwing hands on the grid ↳ georgerussell63 if they do, can someone film it? ↳ y/nleclerc ffs

carmenmmundt prettiest girl in the whole wide world 🩷 ↳ y/nleclerc MWAH MWAH MWAH love you carm 💜

francisca.c.gomes getting ed sheeran on the case rn ↳ y/nleclerc i still bawl my eyes out to cold coffee nearly daily ↳ pierregasly really y/n? ed sheeran? ↳ y/nleclerc ok mr listens to crazy frog when he thinks no one can hear

fan lando being the only one y/n airs everytime ☠️ ↳ fan feel bad for him at this point 😭 ↳ fan y/n you want a lover boy, he is RIGHT THERE

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y/nleclerc uploaded 3 pictures to their story

[caption: y/nnies song recs of the day] replies:

charles_leclerc need to find you a boyfriend immediately so you'll stop posting sappy songs on ig ↳ y/nleclerc as long as its not one of your colleagues ↳ charles_leclerc whats wrong with them? :((( ↳ y/nleclerc i hear enough about cars from you i dont need it from them too

landonorris iris is a certified BANGER

heidiberger wanna go get coffee?? i need you to give me new songs for my danny playlist ↳ y/nleclerc y'all are so gross but yesssss ↳ heidiberger i think you misspelt cute 😋

fan y/n can i recommend turning page by sleeping at last? i'm not sure if you have it on your playlist already ❤️ ↳ y/nleclerc team edward FOR LIFE!!!! was one of the songs that got me into my lover girl era ❤️❤️

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liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris and 607,285 others

y/nleclerc garden party with my favourite leclerc saint mleux ❤️

charles_leclerc wow i see how it is... ↳ y/nleclerc not my fault your son is cuter than you ↳ oscarpiastri aw i knew you thought i was cute 🥰🥰 ↳ y/nleclerc the cutest piastri-leclerc! come round for tea soon, i miss my nephew x ↳ oscarpiastri will you make that pasta dish again? ↳ y/nleclerc i will just for you! ↳ landonorris osc save some for me please ↳ oscarpiastri get your own y/n this ones mine ↳ landonorris just you wait

fan the adoption is going strong i see ↳ fan i think y/ns the biggest instigator for it 😭

alexandrasaintmleux am i your favourite saint mleux? 🥺 ↳ y/nleclerc always x

landonorris leo!! miss my little man ↳ fan day 2947 of y/n airing lando ↳ fan leave him be, his little crush is cute

arthurleclerc if leo's your favourite leclerc saint mleux, am i your favourite leclerc? ↳ y/nleclerc not even close, that spot is for maman only ↳ leclerc_pascale 🥰🥰

fan where's the dress from?? its so gorgeous!! ↳ y/nleclerc it's from a little boutique in monaco! let me see if i can find some alternatives online 💜 ↳ fan my queen thank you!!!

fan oh to be at a garden party with the leclercs...

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charles_leclerc uploaded to their story

replies:

fan you and alex are so cute ↳ charles_leclerc 😉🤫 ↳ fan what does that mean im scared

fan alex was wearing a floor length dress,, whomstdve is THAT mr leclerc?

arthurleclerc i don't like the way he was looking at her ↳ charles_leclerc don't you dare say anything ↳ arthurleclerc you want.. lando???? to date our sister ↳ charles_leclerc oh he's absolutely smitten, it's cute

y/nleclerc is... is that me and lando? ↳ charles_leclerc you guys looked so cute i couldn't help it ↳ y/nleclerc stalker alert!!! ↳ charles_leclerc deflect all you want, i know you liiiike him ↳ y/nleclerc 🙄🙄

landonorris mate can you send me this please? ↳ charles_leclerc yeah sure 😉

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liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc and 679,253 others

y/nleclerc i believe the kids call it serving cunt

alexandrasaintmleux most gorgeous girl in the whole wide world 🩷 ↳ y/nleclerc come give me a kiss xx

charles_leclerc ??!!!?!?!?!???!!!! text me rn!! ↳ y/nleclerc i'm busy ↳ charles_leclerc i have a key to your flat, i'm not afraid to use it ↳ y/nleclerc damn ok so needy

arthurleclerc and who is that. ↳ y/nleclerc why do you wanna know? ↳ arthurleclerc oh god its Him isn't it? ↳ y/nleclerc you say that like its a bad thing 😭 ↳ arthurleclerc it is

fan UMMM??? 3rd pic???? deets please miss y/n ↳ y/nleclerc if all goes well, i'll give you all a full debrief

fan MOTHERRRRRRRRRRR

fan never mind the man DATE ME!!!! ↳ alexandrasaintmleux ^^ ↳ lilymhe ^^ ↳ lilyzneimer ^^ ↳ alexalbon charles stop bringing your sister to races i dont know if i can fight PLEASE ↳ y/nleclerc you would lose with those lanky arms wimp

fan poor lando in the likes... watching the girl he fancies go on a date with someone else ↳ fan how do you know he fancies her? ↳ fan he's constantly in her comments even if she airs him, he gets the goo goo eyes whenever she's near and don't even get me started on hungary 2022 ↳ fan ... please continue ↳ fan ok SO! she was in the paddock before the race and some guy came up to her and was asking her for a photo and then he asked her on a date ??? like dude use critical thinking skills for one second ... lando was across the paddock with daniel and there's a photo of him somewhere staring DAGGERS into this mans soul... charles came over and shooed the man away and lando literally deflated.. i'll see if i can find the photos ↳ fan tag me in them please ↳ fan me too! ↳ fan me three!! ↳ charles_leclerc me four!! ↳ fan CHARLES???

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y/nleclerc uploaded to their story

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liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc and 708,256 others

y/nleclerc flowers from lover (?) boy :)

fan oh she's down Bad ♥️ y/nleclerc

fan guys dont call me delusional but i think she's dating a driver ↳ fan charles would burn the world down before he would let that happen ↳ fan i gotta say... they have a point, remember when they did that tiktok where they asked drivers who they would introduce their sisters to on the grid and charles said lando immediately ↳ fan and then they did the f2 gang and arthur threatened to kamikaze anyone who tried to go near y/n? ↳ fan going off the comments i'm putting 2 and 2 together and getting 4 ↳ y/nleclerc ironic ↳ fan Y/N??????

fan pls show us lover boy its been 84 years i am begging you ↳ y/nleclerc it's been like 3 months silly but soon :)

charles_leclerc i know i should feel sick seeing you so happy but it's nice to see you be treated how you deserve ↳ y/nleclerc charlie 🥺 ↳ alexandrasaintmleux he's giggling and kicking his feet rn ↳ charles_leclerc wow ↳ fan ik he's picked out a suit for the imaginary wedding ↳ charles_leclerc i reject that statement ↳ alexandrasaintmleux it's bookmarked on his laptop

landonorris pretty flowers! ↳ y/nleclerc thank you :)

fan ???!!!!! SHE REPLIED TO LANDO???? ↳ fan i know he's squealing rn ↳ fan adding it to my "y/nlando dating REAL" spreadsheet ↳ fan omg share the link ↳ charles_leclerc yeah share the link ↳ fan this feels like confirmation but we all know charles lives for the drama

leclerc_pascale don't forget to bring him to the garden party tonight! ↳ fan another one? ↳ y/nleclerc we do them quite often in summer!! it's an excuse to drink champagne at 3 in the afternoon ↳ fan ur so real for that

carmenmmundt lover boy 😔 that should be me ↳ y/nleclerc i've got two hands for a reason babygirl x

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y/nleclerc uploaded 3 pictures to their story

[caption 3: lover boy (no ? this time)] replies:

landonorris lover girl ❤️ ↳ y/nleclerc lover boy ❤️

charles_leclerc photo creds? ↳ y/nleclerc nope!

alexandrasaintmleux its not too late to run away with me x ↳ y/nleclerc meet me at the port at midnight, we can steal charles' boat xx ↳ alexandrasaintmleux y/n it's charles i will bomb the port. ↳ y/nleclerc oh you're Crazy crazy ↳ alexandrasaintmleux only for her ↳ y/nleclerc gross... put my gf back on the phone

fan the sign 🥹 we need to know all the deets ↳ y/nleclerc all i will say is he gave me a mixtape :))))) ↳ fan A MIXTAPE??? LIKE A PHYSICAL MIXTAPE??? oh we stan

fan WHO !!! IS !!! LOVER BOY !!! ↳ y/nleclerc all will be revealed soon ;)

arthurleclerc maybe he has rights ↳ y/nleclerc shush you love him ↳ arthurleclerc thats before he started fancying 🤢 you 🤢

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liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc and 789,502 others

y/nleclerc he may not be able to write me love songs, but his voice is my favourite melody ❤️

fan we've officially lost her boys 💔💔

carmenmmundt just looked at george and sighed ↳ georgerussell63 ?? why am i catching strays?? ↳ lilymhe me with alex ↳ alexalbon what he say fuck me for?

fan lover girl x lover boy era <333333 ♥️ y/nleclerc

fan guys that's lando's necklace i'm like 99.9% sure ↳ fan you're onto something there lemme look at pap pics from the last race!

fan guys the flowers are orange... papaya even...

landonorris the guy sure likes his bouquets ↳ y/nleclerc yeah he's a real romantic 😋 ↳ fan WHERE'S THE FAN WITH THE SPREADSHEET ↳ fan I'M HERE !!!!! typing as fast as my fingers can handle!!!!

alexandrasaintmleux just so you know charles is crying at the caption ↳ y/nleclerc big softie x ↳ charles_leclerc i just have a lot of feelings :(((((

arthurleclerc i will allow him to live another day ↳ y/nleclerc i'm sure he's shivering his timbers rn ↳ arthurleclerc >:((((

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👤 landonorris liked by landonorris, alexandrasaintmleux and 903,185 others

y/nleclerc lover boy x

fan miss rabbit has fainted

fan spreadsheet fan we just got a HUGE update ↳ fan i'm gonna break my laptop in 2 with my bare hands

charles_leclerc :))))) my scheme worked ↳ y/nleclerc i still hate when you do that shit ↳ alexandrasaintmleux same 🙄

landonorris lover girl x ♥️ y/nleclerc

landonorris so gorgeous, i love the way you look tonight xx ↳ y/nleclerc you said the same thing the night we danced together 🥺 ↳ landonorris i meant it then and i mean it now x

mclaren scuderiaferrari we stole your girl xx ↳ scuderiaferrari you and your ugly colours can get BACK 🤺🤺🤺 ↳ fan the girls are fighting!! ↳ mclaren UGLY COLOURS??? oh its on

carlossainz55 now he'll stop blowing up my phone about you ↳ landonorris nah now i can just annoy you about how cute my GIRLFRIEND is ↳ oscarpiastri you've been dying to say that, haven't you? ↳ landonorris mate i thought i was going to die

fan sorry can we circle back around to charles saying his scheme worked??? ↳ fan yeah charles_leclerc spill. ↳ charles_leclerc a magician never reveals his tricks ↳ y/nleclerc he forced me and lando to talk at the garden party and then pretended to get a phone call from ferrari so he could play eternal flame over the speakers ↳ charles_leclerc y/n :(((( ↳ y/nleclerc you used my love song weakness against me, you don't get to have secrets

alexandrasaintmleux can't believe he stole my girl :( ↳ y/nleclerc you know my heart is always yours x ↳ landonorris WOMP WOMP i didn't pine for years to share

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a/n: thank you for requesting!! i think i've listened to the song about 400 times writing this! needed a lil break from the gote series and this was the perfect thing to get me out of my slump <3

taglist: @golden-hoax

[kxsagi]

Hello! Can I request bllk boys with a reader who has respiratory problems and always get tired so easily/can't do much physical activity? I struggle with it and it sucks running out of breath doing basic things 😭 (With Isagi, Sae, Rin, Yukimiya and Reo please 🙏)

“𝐢 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐬𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐢𝐬 𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐲”

a/n: i hope you are doing well! please remember that it doesn't define your worth at all love 🤍

also not sure if you need meds for this, but i added it just in case! 

title was inspired by the song easy by mac ayres highly recommenddd

ft. isagi yoichi, itoshi sae, itoshi rin, yukimiya kenyu, mikage reo

isagi yoichi

isagi panics the first time he sees you really out of breath, like, full deer-in-headlights energy. 

once he learns more about your condition, he becomes so attentive. 

always walks at your pace, no matter how slow it is. 

“you okay?” is basically his catchphrase when you’re out together. 

offers you piggyback rides constantly (and not even in a joking way). 

turns basic errands into fun slow dates: grocery store run? “let’s stop for a break. snack time?” 

always has water, your meds (if you need any), and a mental map of benches nearby. 

if you're ever frustrated about your limits, he holds your face and says softly, “you’re not weak. you’re just built different, and i love you like this.” 

itoshi sae

sae’s quiet, but you know he’s always observing you. 

doesn’t comment much, but the way he subtly adjusts the thermostat, brings your bag to you, or puts your meds in your coat pocket before leaving the house, it’s love. 

the moment he notices you getting tired, he wraps an arm around you and leads you to the nearest bench or chair. 

“sit down. don’t argue.” 

won’t let you lift anything heavy. like, nothing. grocery bags? no. laundry basket? absolutely not. 

if someone says anything ignorant like “you don’t look sick,” sae will turn and go, “and you don’t look that stupid, but here we are.” 

he doesn’t baby you, but he makes sure you’re never made to feel lesser. 

the calm to your storm when you’re upset about it. 

itoshi rin

rin does not understand chronic exhaustion at first and lowkey feels helpless. 

but he learns fast. and once he understands, he becomes protective in a very lowkey way. 

always walks with you on the side with more shade, notices when you start breathing heavier and immediately slows down. 

gets real quiet when you say you feel useless or frustrated. not because he doesn’t care, but because he’s thinking hard about what to say to make it better. 

his version of comfort is: “you’re not a burden. if anyone says that again, they can talk to me.” 

starts doing light stretching with you just to keep you company, even if he could be training. 

lets you use his chest as your personal pillow when you’re tired (and you catch him softly smiling every time). 

makes you playlists for when you’re resting, all filled with songs that remind him of you. 

yukimiya kenyu

yuki relates to your struggles more than the others because of his eye condition. 

he understands what it’s like to have a body that doesn’t always cooperate. 

“you’re doing amazing,” he tells you even when you feel like you’ve done nothing. 

loves planning soft, cozy dates that don’t take up much energy: bookstores, art galleries, flower markets. 

will read aloud to you if you’re too tired to do it yourself. 

the king of soothing you when you feel bad about missing out on something. “just because your pace is different doesn’t mean you’re behind. you’re still moving forward, love.” 

always has tissues, lip balm, and your meds in his bag. 

his camera roll is filled with sleepy, bundled-up pics of you where he writes lil captions like “my sunshine” or “resting beauty.” 

mikage reo

reo, rich boy with a heart of gold, immediately goes into caretaker mode. 

offers to fund every comfort item you might want: fancy humidifiers, cute inhaler cases, memory foam shoes, everything. 

but more than that, he listens. like, really listens when you explain what it feels like. 

“you don’t have to do anything to impress me. if all we do today is lay around and breathe, that’s more than enough.” 

brings you flowers when you’re stuck at home. 

takes you on bougie slow strolls through gardens or museums because “we’re not here to rush.” 

gets very pouty when you push yourself too far and don’t tell him. “you promised you’d take it easy, dummy.” 

makes sure you never feel like a burden, always a priority, never a problem. 

© 𝐤𝐱𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐢

[monolotus]

Main story vs Close friends

“She never posts her man, says ‘he’s just lowkey’ Girl- blink twice if he’s imaginary” only if they knew…

more under the cut!

The replies to your storys are so funny. You post the most romantic view of Seoul, showing a man by your side and the people go wild.

The thing is, though, it´s so annoying trying to be an it couple with the most offline millenial of them all.

"Babe, did you see this trend? I´ve seen so many couples doing it, can we also do it?" Meanwhile he hasn´t been on tiktok for the last four days.

Everybody has an addiction to their phones. Except Joshua.

He goes on tiktok to see the videos you sent him, and only going on his finsta to comment on dino´s latest post.

And let´s not even talk about the online jokes you may tell him, and how he looks at you like a lost puppy (because he is)

You ended up being his social media manager, telling him what is trending and what carat may want to see.

Is not like you care too much- you get to soft launch your boyfriend on your instagram without worries of his fans finding your account.

And, even if they did, what was there to cry about? The matching beaded bracelets? The guitar pick you carry on your phone case?

So, the actual hard launch of the relationship was... hard.

It slipped, he wasn´t supposed to talk about you. But Na pd is so funny, and his team so welcoming, it was just so easy to end up having conversations with the staff.

He was proudly showing to one of the writers his new beaded bracelet- a soft pink with little pearls, and one bead of different color, in the middle of the bracelet.

And he was caught off guard, when the girl asked "does the other bracelet have a different color? or it matches?"

"Yeah, it´s the same color. My girlfriend wanted the energy gemstone set, but it was out of stock... so until i can buy it for her, this will do!"

And as the conversation went on and on, and the alcohol on his blood (and brain) runs out, he realized what he had done- nobody outside of his close friend group knew about you.

And, apparently, the mic picked up his conversation, even if it wasn´t supposed to (as Na pd´s team had told his company) so, he had to have the talk with you.

It wasn´t such a big deal for you, though, already curating the perfect photo dump and a romantic, silly caption.

His post was on weverse, a long explanation about how the two of you met, and how he was the happiest when he was around you and carat, both giving him energy to go trought the day.

Your post? Perfectly curated, radiating boyfriend energy. A picture of your boyfriend playing the guitar, a video of him and you on a date and a screenshot of a random conversation "this is so us" you had sent, with the picture of two cats cuddling. but first? a silly story.

[vigilantekisser]

dex vs. the emoji industrial complex

masterlist | ao3 mirror

summary: dex has zero social media literacy and doesn't know wtf you're talking about. (1.1k, gn reader, crack, fluff, office friendship, dirty joke, minions, dex tries to understand what memes are; honestly idk why this was so long i just want to have more of dex ig)

It’s just a stupid meme, so you don’t think much of it when you send it to Dex—a low quality, atrociously Photoshopped picture of a puppy with its brain getting poked with an injection, Ritalin pills and a 5G tower in the background: 

     theyre doing this to me at work tomorrow btw [Sent 9:06 AM]

Dex doesn’t reply, not even with his usual stilted “Thanks”.

You’re fine with that, totally; you already know Dex is, well, himself—man of few words and composure and too-sharp jawline… So. You assume he’s just ignoring you as usual, which makes you a little bit pleased knowing you’ve probably stupefied your poor coworker into bewilderment once again.

What you don’t know is that you’re exactly right. Twenty feet away, in a sterile cubicle surrounded by discarded tactical gear and stacks of paperwork, Dex is staring at his screen like it personally offended him.

Dex blinks once, finally, slow like a cat watching a ceiling fan.

“…The fuck.”

 The badly edited puppy has a syringe full of mercury pointed into its brain and someone’s holding an orange bottle of ADHD pills behind it. He rereads the sentence, just in case it holds a secret meaning. 

     theyre doing this to me at work tomorrow btw

He leans back in his chair like a man confronting the unknowable void.

“Is this funny?” he mutters. “Do I say something?”

He opens Google.

     “dog on ADHD medication??”

No luck. It sends him to some Instagram pages with dogs he doesn’t care about, and he closes the tab after seeing a bunch of drama on the PetMD forum. Symbolism perhaps? Puppy = you; mercury = brain damage; the cell tower = some kind of conspiracy… at work… the Bureau...? 

Oh fuck it. He gives up.

     Are you ok?      [Sent 10:40 AM]

Aha, so the man responds. You send back four emojis: 💻💀😭🙏

A few minutes later, your phone pings.

     I hope they don’t inject anything into your head.      [Sent 10:45 AM]

You snort, trying to stifle your snicker. You can hear this guy’s voice in your head. thank u king that’s so thoughtful, you send back.

By lunchtime Dex is three articles deep into “Millennial vs Gen Z Humor: A Brief History of Nihilistic Absurdism.” He doesn’t mean to care, really. You’ve probably forgotten about it entirely but he hasn’t. He’s finally gotten the point of the picture you sent, to his satisfaction, but why is the skull emoticon thing everywhere now? 

     skull emoji meaning      Result: “Used to express laughing so hard you’re dead.”

He shakes his head. That doesn’t make any fucking sense.

The next day, you wake up to multiple messages from Dex.

     Thank you for your dog Meme, it’s very funny.      Work is like that sometimes.      Haha      ☠️      [sent 5:10 AM]

You stare at the screen for a long time.

     ☠️

Actually, you think your hands are shaking now. You message back:

     wtf u know how to use emojis????????????

He replies immediately:

     Yes.      I think

Then:

     🔥

Why is there fire now. What does the fire mean. Is he okay. Your face’s gone hot and you screenshot it for maybe nothing in particular but, well, to look back at later on and laugh harder.

It’s Friday, which is a vacation enough in itself but unfortunately that still means you should be working and processing the latest field report Mockta dropped on your desk. But instead, you’re doing something far more dangerous. You’re messing with Dex again. You send him a photo of someone furiously petting a cat’s head.

     Me rubbing the workweek’s pussy so it finishes faster      [Sent 9:48 AM]

Dex is drinking his coffee—straight black, very sad—when he sees the notification. He reads your caption and almost spits into his sleeve.

What did you just send him.

He stares and reads it again.

“Me rubbing the workweek’s… Oh God…” He trails off, rubbing his brow in anguish. He lowers the phone slowly, looking around the bullpen, the hallway, the exit. Then he turns to his laptop and opens Google. God help him.

     pussy rubbing work week 

He hits Enter and immediately regrets it. A new tab opens. A very not-safe-for-work one accessed through the Bureau Wi-Fi. There’s moaning and a lot of exposed skin. One of the women is holding a calendar. He slams his laptop shut so hard the desk rattles, mind racing.

He didn’t read about this shit in any of the articles he read last Tuesday! Staring into the abyss of his screen, Dex messages back:

     ?

     omg dex it’s a joke      i hopeyou did NOT google that      are u okay

There’s a long pause, an eternity really. You sip your coffee, wipe at your eyes. Then, finally:

     Understood.      Thanks for the explanation     I did but i won’t Google anything ever again.      [Sent 10:21 AM]

The mental image of him in a mortified fugue state, recoiling from his screen, is almost too much—but you manage to swallow your laughter as Ray walks past your desk, shooting you a wary look.

The rest of the day is uneventful. You manage to make a small dent in the field reports. Dex doesn’t message you again and you assume you’ve broken him with the dirty joke, which—honestly—fair.

You don’t see him again until you're heading out, bag slung over your shoulder, keys jangling in your hand. You pass Dex’s desk, and he stands up so fast he almost collides with the corner of his desk. 

“Hey,” he says, voice weirdly formal. He wrings his hands. “Uh. Wait a second.”

You stop. “Yeah?”

He hesitates, squinting as he unlocks his phone, and silently holds it out to you. You blink down at the screen.

It’s a Minion. A fucking Minion. The image is so low-res you can count the pixels, jpeg artifacting all over. The Minion’s mid-stride, throwing up a peace sign. The text reads:

     BestfriEND      BoyfriEND      GirlfriEND      Food      Only Food has no END.

There’s a watermark in the corner that says something like “Susan's Recipe Shack,” straight from the Facebook feed of someone’s divorced aunt. It takes you a second to process what’s happening. And then you wheeze, laughing so violently your knees buckle a little. Two people from Cybercrimes glance up. You wave them away, tears in your eyes.

“Oh my God,” you gasp, clutching your chest. “Dex. Dex.”

He’s standing stiffly, eyes flicking nervously around the room, like he didn’t expect you to react. His phone wavers in his hand. “You don’t have to laugh that hard,” he mutters, starting to pull it back.

“No, no—don’t you dare delete that,” you grab his wrist, still breathless. “You made this? Where did you find it?”

He blinks. “Facebook.”

“Christ almighty, you’re going deeper.”

He swallows, ears red and flexing his hands. “You seem to like them.”

You giggle again and this time somebody mutters something about needing to go home. You don’t care. Dex is still standing there like he’s not sure if he should run away, but a smile’s starting to tug at his mouth too.

“Keep going,” you say, grinning so hard your cheeks hurt. “I want more tomorrow.”

“…Alright,” he nods. He’s serious but the blush’s absolutely radiating off his face. “I’ll look for more Minions.”

a/n: this is what i was talking about btw

[ddejavvu]

Reader sending a picture of her not very balanced very snacky but yummy meal captioned “girl dinner!!” while Spencer is away on a case and it just turns into Spencer calling her in front of everyone to kindly lecture on how that isn’t an actual meal and how she needs to eat something real/he’ll order something for her LMAO

You're not expecting the immediate call from Spencer after you send him a picture of your meal, but you pick it up anyways with the crunch of a pretzel stick.

"Spence?" You speak through your mouthful, long-since over the illusion of perfection around him.

"Angel," He greets you, worry lacing his sweeet voice, "Is that really your dinner?"

"Yeah," You laugh, looking down at the collection of pretzel sticks and cheesy popcorn that adorn the plate around your bowl of macaroni and cheese, "I don't feel like anything else."

"Sweetheart," He hums, "That's not a very nourishing meal. You're probably going to feel gross afterwards, it's going to make you tired and you're not going to feel very energized tomorrow."

"Spence, I know," You chuckle, adjusting the phone against your ear, "It's girl dinner. It's supposed to be unhealthy and mismatched."

"Girl dinner," He grumbles, his brows probably furrowed adorably. "What-?"

In the background you hear assorted giggles, Prentiss's the most recognizable. You assume that others are JJ and Garcia, and you hope they're enjoying themselves.

"It's a meme," You explain, "An internet joke, Spencer. I'm in the mood for junk food, so instead of forcing myself to eat healthy all the time, sometimes you just have to give in and eat like shit for a night. Girl dinner."

"If you paired it with a vegetable, you'd at least be getting some nutrients," Spencer tries, but you cut him off while you stir your macaroni.

"No vegetables. This is girl dinner. I'm okay, Spence, I'll eat something really good for breakfast tomorrow."

"Okay," He's hesitant to agree, "But- but honey, if you're having trouble preparing yourself food, I can order in for you, okay? Just tell me what you want and I'll wake up early to have it sent over."

"Spencer!" You giggle, eager to get to your less-than-balanced meal, "Okay. This is just a one-time joke, okay? I thought it would be funny to send you. You don't have to worry."

"I worry about you all the time," He confesses, and you know it's meant to be flattering instead of insulting, "I'll have fresh fruit delivered for you tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay, Spencer." You finally concede, "Okay. I love you."

"I love you too," Now you hear the relaxed smile in his voice, "Enjoy your- uh, girl dinner."

[crushpunky]

actress!reader: la vlog

masterlist | actress!reader masterlist

based off of this ask that i thought was super cool and unique. this took a lil while to put together, so i hope y'all enjoy <3

Y/n’s fans were surprised to wake up to see a link on her story with the simple caption: my very first vlog, out now !!!

The vlog started out simply, y/n propping her phone on top of the counter. Sitting behind the phone, just out of frame, Drew sat shirtless on the couch of their Airbnb, watching y/n as she started her video.

“Hey guys!” Y/n smiled, waving before she let out a yawn. “I just woke up in case you couldn’t tell by the hair and the face and the—” y/n gestured vaguely to herself in her pajamas— “but, we are in LA and have a long day ahead of us.”

Y/n continued, chatting as she got around. She slipped into a flowy dress, sweeping her hair back as she double checked her reflection. As she finished, Drew could be seen poking his head into the bathroom. One y/n noticed him in the camera, she smiled before turning around.

“Say hello to the vlog, Drewseph.” Y/n said, gesturing to the camera. Drew gave a small wave to the camera before going to scratch the nape of his neck with a sheepish grin.

“He’s camera shy, sorry folks.” Y/n laughed. Drew’s brows furrowed, pulling the door open to step into the bathroom.

“An actor who’s camera shy?” Drew joked, brushing a piece of hair away from her face. Y/n shrugged, looking up at Drew deadpanned. They only met eyes for a moment before the two of them broke out into giggles.

“Ok, enough!” Y/n said, elbowing Drew playfully. “Let’s get coffee.”

Drew and y/n took a short drive, the two of them enjoying the sunny weather despite the hoards of traffic. After a while, they made it to one of the coffee shops they frequented during their trips out to LA. It was no Claire’s, but it was certainly wonderful.

The two of them got their drinks and food, sliding into a table tucked away in the back corner. While there were certainly more people walking around than there usually were in Charleston, nobody seemed to pay them any mind, the locals probably used to the daily celebrity sightings and the tourists too focused on seeing all the sites to bat an eye.

“Cheers.” Drew said, holding up his coffee. Y/n picked up her own, the two of them touching their cups together before they both took their first sips. Y/n let out a low groan, closing her eyes as she savored the coffee. Drew watched her out of the corner of his eye, smirking to himself as he took another sip.

“Pretty damn good.” Y/n said, sitting her drink down. She picked up the flaky croissant in front of her, ripping off a piece before offering it out to Drew. He took it, popping it into his mouth while y/n took a bite.

“Pretty damn good.” Drew repeated, his mouth full of pastry. Y/n shook her head, smiling as she swallowed the croissant before taking another sip of her drink.

“Ok party people, we’ve got a lot to do before our… “big event” tonight.” Y/n smiled, wiggling her eyes playfully as she spoke. Drew continued eating quietly, watching y/n intently as she explained their plans for the day.

Once they had finished their food, they decided to take a walk around downtown and stop in at some places to shop. Y/n looped her arm through Drew’s, holding onto his bicep as they perused the clothing racks, the two of them stopping occasionally to pull out an item that caught their eye.

“What about these?” Y/n asked the camera as she slid on a pair of vintage, tortoiseshell sunglasses. She moved her head around, examining the sunglasses from different angles.

“Nice.” Drew said simply, nodding before he slid them off of y/n’s nose before sliding on a pair of oversized, bulky goggles. Y/n let out a scoff as Drew smiled down at her.

“Those look much better.” Drew teased.

“I look like I’m about to go snorkeling.” Y/n said, shaking her head before sliding the sunglasses off.

Y/n adjusted the strap of her swim top as her and Drew walked out onto the pristine sand of the beach. Just off of where they were staying, and tucked away from the public eye, was a small beach. The waves of the ocean rose and crashed, sending salt spray into the air.

“It is a little chilly out, but just look at how sunny it is!” Y/n panned across the water, showing off the bright sun was bouncing off of the waves. Eventually she panned back around to herself as she settled into the sand, lounging back in a beach chair they’d carried down from the house.

“This is definitely a whole different vibe than back in the Outer Banks.” Y/n said, Drew nodding off camera as he gazed out across the ocean. Drew draped his arm against the back of y/n’s chair, fiddling with one of the frayed edges of the cushion.

“We’ve still got a few hours until we need to start heading to the venue, so we’re gonna relax and enjoy this beautiful day and we will see you in a bit.” Y/n said before waving goodbye to the camera.

The two of them chatted and listened to music playing off of Drew’s phone, basking in the sun and soaking in the scenery. Eventually, they made their way out into the water. The two of them waded around, continuing their chatting as the water swirled around them. Y/n draped her arms around Drew’s neck, scratching her nails against the nape of his buzzcut.

“You nervous?” Y/n asked, a smirk on her lips. Drew chuckled, resting his hands on her waist.

“Of course not…” Drew shrugged. “Well… maybe a little bit.”

“You’re gonna be fine.” Y/n chuckled. “I think you forget your job is to be a performer.”

“Ok, ok, I guess that’s fair.” Drew grinned.

In the next clip, y/n was back in the bathroom, a fluffy white robe wrapped around her body as she dabbled a bit of blush on her cheekbones. Her hair was swept back out of her face as she leaned in, focusing on her makeup in the reflection.

“Well, by the time this video comes out, you already know where we’re going, but in case you don’t,” y/n explained, “Drew and I are going to HAIM’s show here in LA.”

Y/n smiled widely, letting out an excited squeal.

“We’re big fans and we actually got to be in their music video for their song ‘Relationships’ so you should check it out, y’all.” Y/n said, finishing off her makeup with a flourish. Y/n ran a hand down her hair, working it into place with a quirk of her brow.

“Now, let’s see if we can get Drew to do a fit check.” Y/n leaned in closely, whispering to the camera before leaning away again.

“Drew, would you like to do a fit check with me?” Y/n shouted as she tugged the tie of her robe off to reveal her outfit underneath. Shortly after hearing his name, Drew hopped off of the couch before making his way down the hallway to where y/n was.

“A fit check?” He asked as he stepped into frame, y/n nodding as she pointed to the camera. Drew nodded, smoothing a hand down the front of his shirt as he stood next to y/n.

“Ok, so, I can go first.” Y/n said, stepping forward. She went through her outfit, explaining in detail each part from the gold hoops hanging from her ears to the black mary janes she wore on her feet. As she talked, Drew watched, his eyes widening both in amusement and panic, before y/n turned back to look at him.

“Your turn, Starkey.” Y/n grinned, stepping back and gesturing for him to go ahead.

“Well, don’t be expecting me to be quite so… thorough.” Drew teased as he started going over his outfit. He wore a brown t-shirt over a white long sleeve, the look partnered with a pair of black work pants and his usual playful smirk.

“These pants are,” Drew stretched his head around, trying to look for some sort of tag. “I do not know, I think you bought these for me actually.”

“I think I did get these for you.” Y/n giggled, grasping onto the tag at the back of Drew’s waistband. “Yep, I got these for you. They’re Carhartt.”

“Well there you go, they’re Carhartt.” Drew grinned, stepping back to stand next to y/n. He draped his arm across her shoulders, leaning his head atop hers gently.

“And that’s our fit check,” Y/n smiled. “We’ll see you at the concert!”

The atmosphere was electric, the music blaring loudly throughout the venue as the fans sang along excitedly. Just off the side of the stage, away from the eyes of the audience, Drew and y/n watched the performance. The two of them swayed to the music, Drew’s hand tapping along on the small of y/n’s back.

Then, it was time. Once the sisters signalled, the two of them came out. The audience erupted into cheers and applause, y/n and Drew waving as they made their way out onto the stage. They crowded around the microphone next to the Haim sisters, the five of them singing playfully, the sisters much more on key than y/n or Drew. 

Regardless though, once they finished, they were greeted by yet another round of cheers from the audience. Este wrapped her arms around everyone, all of them coming together in a group hug filled with smiles and laughter. With one last wave to the audience, y/n and Drew made their way off stage after their brief appearance.

“We love y/n and Drew.” Danielle said into the microphone as y/n and Drew started back to their seats in the crowd. Drew kept a firm grip on y/n’s waist as they wove through the excited fans.

“Can everybody say we love you y/n and Drew?” Danielle asked, strumming her guitar. Alana directed her hand in a wave, encouraging the audience as they all shouted.

“We love you y/n and Drew.” The audience screamed, bringing wide smiles to y/n and Drew’s faces.

“Speaking of y/n and Drew, how about we play a little song for them?” Danielle said before the beginning notes of “Relationships” rang out. Y/n let out an excited cheer, even Drew joining in as the two of them began to dance and sing along.

[starset21]

Tagged and Dragged

Pairing: Isack Hadjar x reader

Vibe: Meme chaos → playful banter → lowkey flirting

Standard disclaimer: I do not consent to the posting, translating, or publishing of my work to any 3rd party site, the only place it may found is on tumblr or A03 under the same name. This is all fake. It does not reflect real people, real events or their actual actions or relationships. May contain google translated languages.

You didn’t mean to tag Isack Hadjar in the meme.

You were just scrolling, sleep-deprived and dangerously confident, deep into a late-night motorsport meme spiral. It was supposed to be a throwaway post for your mutuals to laugh at:

“Bro’s hair looks like he argued with a leaf blower and lost 💀💀💀” (Attached: a wild screencap of Isack post-helmet, mid-interview, curls in disarray.)

It was meant to be private. Funny. Anonymous. What it was not meant to be was tagged directly to @ isackhadjar.

But it was. And the internet, cruel and fast, noticed.

Your heart sinks. Your eyes widen. You click the tweet in panic—yep, that blue tag is real. Verified. Active. Alive.

And worse?

He saw it.

Because within three minutes, you get a DM notification:

@ isackhadjar:

Brutal. At least follow me if you’re gonna roast me. 👀

You do what any reasonable person would do. You scream into your pillow.

Then you type back:

@ Y/Nofftrack:

OH MY GOD I THOUGHT YOU WERE A FAN ACCOUNT I’M SO SORRY

Unless… you are a fan of leaf blowers In which case the post was… support?? innovation?? themed content??? okay I’ll delete myself now

He replies faster than expected:

@ isackhadjar:

Nah don’t. That was kinda funny. I respect the commitment. Helmet hair is undefeated. Happens to the best of us. Especially me. But I will be starting a personal war with leaf blowers now. Just FYI.

You blink at your phone. Is he... actually cool about this?

@ Y/Nofftrack:

Honestly? Your curls bounced back by the next frame. Resilience like that deserves a sponsor Dyson better start calling

@ isackhadjar:

Dyson collab where I just stand in front of a wind tunnel with sad music playing Caption: “He trusted the airflow.” 😔

You laugh. This is ridiculous. And somehow... adorable.

@ Y/Nofftrack:

I could make a redemption meme But I feel like I deserve compensation Like a paddock pass. Or pad thai. Or both. You know. For emotional damages.

His reply comes in three parts:

@ isackhadjar:

Deal. Paddock pass, pad thai, and a dramatic hair flip next time I podium. But only if you retire the leaf blower slander And start tagging me in hot pics instead My PR team is starving

You pause. Blink again. That’s flirting. Right?

@ Y/Nofftrack:

“Hot pics” You’re acting like I didn’t just post a cursed screenshot of you mid-blink Be serious I don’t even have Photoshop. I have Canva and chaos…but if you’re volunteering your angles Say less.

@ isackhadjar:

Canva and chaos is honestly my brand We’d be unstoppable

Then:

Also— Are you the type to soft launch me before we’ve even met? Because you give off “cryptic Instagram caption” energy

You’re smiling. Like, actually smiling. It’s 1:37 a.m. and you’re blushing over DMs from a guy who drives 300 km/h for a living and just admitted his hair has its own agenda.

@ Y/Nofftrack:

Look. If you keep sending messages like this, I am going to call you “someone’s son” and post blurry photos with no context. This is your warning.

@ isackhadjar:

Do it. Soft launch me. Just use a good filter Or the worst one Make the curls look like they achieved sentience

The DMs don’t stop.

What begins as memes turns into reactions to each other’s stories. Inside jokes. Middle-of-the-night messages. He teases your sense of humor. You roast his outfits. He sends you a photo of his post-race hair captioned “Today they won.”

And when you casually post a story from the grandstands at Spa, not even tagging him, he messages you in all caps:

@isackhadjar:

YOU’RE HERE?? I DIDN’T EVEN GET MY REDEMPTION MEME HUG THIS IS A SCANDAL I need at least one hug For morale. For the curls. For justice Maybe two

You grin down at your phone like it’s harboring a secret. Your fingers hover over the keyboard before you type:

@ Y/Nofftrack:

One hug Two if your hair behaves Three if you make podium

You can’t believe you’re doing this. Not the going-to-the-race part—you’ve done that before. But this? Walking through the paddock with a digital pass in your email, a Red Bull guest lanyard around your neck, and the knowledge that Isack Hadjar is waiting to meet you? Yeah. That’s new. Your stomach’s a little too aware of it.

He’d messaged you the night before:

If I don’t see you tomorrow, I’ll assume you ran away from your own meme legacy. Or got lost in merch. I respect both tbh.

Now, you're here. And you're nervous. You scroll your messages, cheeks warm. He sent one 10 minutes ago:

I’m done with media. You around?

You reply:

Yep. Hanging near the sim tent. Not hiding. Definitely not hiding. (okay maybe like 40% hiding)

Your phone buzzes almost instantly.

On my way. Don’t move. Or flinch. I’m hugging you. This has been pending for weeks.

You barely have time to process it before you hear your name.

"Hey!"

You turn—and there he is.

Isack, in his Red Bull team tee and race suit halfway down his waist, arms loose at his sides, curls doing their usual defiant thing. He’s smiling, and it’s so warm, so casual, like this is normal. Like you’re not about to explode from sheer nervous tension.

“Hi,” you say, which is… fine. Not your best work.

He laughs. “Hi? After all that? You meme-bullied me for weeks and you showed up with hi?”

You open your mouth to reply—something witty, something cool—but instead you say, “You look taller in person.”

His smile turns into a smirk. “That’s what the boots are for.”

He steps forward, hesitating for a beat before opening his arms. “C’mon. I’m collecting my race-weekend hug. Don’t make me fight you.” 

Your heart leaps. But you step into it.

The hug is fast at first—quick, friendly—but then he doesn’t let go. Not right away. His arms tighten just slightly. It’s warm. And kind of perfect. You try not to overthink it, but you can feel your heart going wild. When you pull back, you’re smiling like an idiot.

“So,” you say, “Was the hug everything you dreamed?”

Isack grins. “I don’t want to be dramatic but… it might’ve powered the car this weekend.”

You roll your eyes. “You’re impossible.”

He shrugs. “You knew what this was.”

There’s a pause.

He looks at you for a second longer than necessary, then lifts a hand toward your face. “Wait—can I?”

You freeze. “Can you…?”

He leans in, gently ruffling your hair like he’s mimicking your cursed meme. “Balance has been restored,” he says, voice soft. “Now we’re even.”

You laugh, a little breathless. “So dramatic.”

He drops his hand but doesn’t step away. His fingers linger at your arm for a beat, just brushing.

Then he says, more seriously, “I’m really glad you came.”

You meet his gaze. “Yeah. Me too.”

And just as you think the moment’s about to end—he dips forward quickly, presses a soft kiss to your cheek, and pulls back like it’s no big deal.

Like it didn’t just short-circuit your brain.

He smirks, already stepping away. “That was for good luck,” he says. “And maybe because I wanted to.”

Before you can answer, he glances over his shoulder with a wink. “Stay close. I might need another hug after quali.”

You stand there, flustered and grinning like a complete fool.

And yeah… you’re absolutely soft launching him now.

[reiding-writing]

AMALGAMATION. /spencer reid/

you and spencer both spring to provide gideon the best gift you can think of. and it’s the same thing.

early s1 enemy!reader 1.2k fluff series masterlist. main masterlist.

AN | thank you to this request for so many wonderful ideas 🙏 i did change hotch to gideon for the fatherly love rivalry aspect

You don’t mean to start a war, truly, you don’t.

You just want to do something thoughtful. Something meaningful. Something that says, Hey, Gideon, thank you for believing in me even when I doubted myself. Even when I called you “sir” for the first six months because I was too terrified to address you by name.

A gift. Something personal. Something useful. Something clever.

A chess set.

Because what else would you get Gideon, the FBI’s resident father figure who finds peace between cases only through pawn structures and the occasional warbler?

You put thought into it. Not just any chess set—no, that would be too easy. You find one that’s travel-sized, elegant but not showy, and every single piece is represented by a different bird. The rook is a cardinal. The knight, a hawk mid-flight. The queen is an elegant egret, long neck curved like a question mark. It’s brilliant, perfect. It screams you know Gideon.

You wrap it carefully, the same way you handle evidence at a crime scene. Plain brown craft paper, twine string, A simple tag: Happy Birthday. For your next checkmate.

When the day arrives, you hand it over after the little surprise the team managed to scrape together in the conference room. Someone brought a cake — Garcia, probably. Morgan made a joke about Gideon’s age and walked away alive, somehow. JJ coordinated it all like it was a press briefing. Hotch even smiled. Briefly.

Gideon opens your gift first. He lifts the lid, sees the bird-shaped pieces nestled in velvet, and you swear his eyes soften.

Then Spencer hands him his gift.

Another chess set.

You blink.

He smiles—Spencer, that is—just a bit too smug for your liking. “It’s an antique,” he explains, in that maddeningly informative way of his. “Late Victorian era. Hand-carved. Originally from a small village outside Prague,”

You glance at the ornate wood pieces, each shining with a patina of age and reverence. It smells faintly of cedar and old books. Damn him.

The team erupts into laughter.

“Wow, Gideon,” Morgan says, holding his stomach. “You really have no other personality outside of chess, huh?”

“Or birds,” Elle adds, peering into your box. “Look at this one—it’s a pelican,”

JJ raises an eyebrow. “I think this is amazing. Same idea, completely different execution,”

Hotch just says, “Fitting,” which somehow sounds ominous coming from him.

You glare at Spencer. Spencer raises a brow in return.

You both say nothing, because you’re not about to give anyone the satisfaction of knowing how absolutely mortified you are that you gave the same gift. But worse than the embarrassment is the knowledge dawning between you and Reid with crystalline clarity.

This is now a competition.

—

The first time Gideon uses a set post-birthday, it’s yours. You spot him on the jet, seated alone near the back, bird chess pieces flanking either side of the board in battle formation. His hands move slowly, thoughtfully, a egret queen gliding into centre.

You resist the urge to gloat. You’re mature, at least in comparison to Spencer, you think. You simply snap a picture and send it to him with no caption.

Two days later, Spencer updates the whiteboard in the bullpen. A small corner, barely noticeable. It reads:

Gideon’s Chess Set Usage

Birds – 1

Antique – 0

You smile.

It gets worse. Or better, depending on how you view obsession.

Every time Gideon plays chess, one of you is nearby, lurking like a shark in shallow water. Watching. Tallying. Competing.

He doesn’t seem to mind. If he notices the battle, he gives no indication. Which is somehow even more infuriating.

“Not surprised he used the bird one again. Lightweight, easy to carry.”

“Yes, but the antique one has historic value. Psychological gravity. You wouldn’t understand.”

Then it escalates.

You start sabotaging. Not real sabotage, of course—you’re not a monster. Just little things.

One day, you smuggle one of the antique knights out of the office.

“Oh no,” you say, completely deadpan. “I think the hawk ate it.”

Spencer doesn’t laugh.

Another time, you find the aptly chosen kingfisher king piece has been dropped into a mug of lukewarm tea.

“I think the Queen staged a coup,” Spencer says with a shrug.

It’s your turn for stony silence.

Gideon, however, remains unbothered.

“Where’s your chess set?” you ask him one morning on the jet, trying to sound casual.

“Didn’t bring one this trip,” he says, sipping coffee and looking out the window.

“What? Why?”

He shrugs. “My pieces seem to mysteriously disappear,”

You nearly scream.

—

The team catches on eventually.

You should’ve known they would.

Emily is the first to notice the whiteboard. “You’ve been keeping score?”

You shrug, entirely too smug. “Just curious.”

Morgan laughs for a full two minutes. “You two are so competitive.”

JJ backs you up. “It’s kind of sweet. Like two kids vying for dad’s attention,”

You want to protest. You do. But Spencer beats you to it. “It’s not about that,” he says, a little too quickly. “It’s about data. Statistics,”

“Oh, sure,” Morgan drawls. “Definitely not about needing Gideon’s approval,”

Spencer glares.

You glare harder.

The whiteboard reads:

Birds – 5

Antique – 4

You cling to your narrow lead like a child with a balloon.

—

It goes on for weeks.

Cases blur together. States, cities, crime scenes. You chase serial killers by day, and tally chess sets by night. Gideon alternates with frustrating inconsistency. One trip it’s yours. The next, Spencer’s. Once, both—one game on each set, back-to-back. You call that one a tie. Spencer disagrees.

You update the board daily. The numbers tick higher.

At some point, Hotch starts erasing the tally when he needs space for case notes. You and Reid just write it back in the corner again. It becomes part of the bullpen scenery. Like the coffee pot, or Garcia’s glitter pens.

Birds – 12

Antique – 12

The margin narrows. Tensions rise. You and Spencer stop pretending this isn’t the most important metric of your life.

Then one day, you’re on the jet, returning from a long, grim case in Montana. Everyone’s tired. Sleepy. JJ is curled up under a blanket. Morgan is listening to music. Hotch has a file open but hasn’t turned a page in an hour.

And Gideon opens a travel case.

Inside: a modern tragedy.

Your cardinal rook.

Spencer’s antique bishop.

Your hawk knight.

His carved queen.

You blink.

“What… is that?” Spencer asks, brow furrowed.

Gideon doesn’t look up from the board. “Custom set,” he says. “I seem to be missing certain pieces from both sets,”

You and Spencer stare in horror.

“You can’t do that,” you say.

“Why not?” Gideon asks.

“It’s sacrilege,” Spencer says. “It’s—statistically invalid.”

Gideon just smiles as he begins a solo match. The whiteboard remains untouched that week.