#(fricking smartass)

[decapitatedrathead]

𐙚..Love Fool.. 𐙚

Zantetsu Tsurugi x gn!reader

♡!A/N!♡: I'm writing after a whole YEAR (since I kinda...like...deleted all of my fics) but hey, a start is best when it's fresh

Hence why I have to start with one of my favorite idiots; Zantetsu

♡!TW!♡: grammar errors? Idk I'm as dumb as him. otherwise none! Just fluff! I tried to keep it gn, plsss tell me if there's an error abt ittt

You never really understood how you got the patience and nerves to put up with him, since...he's been seriously getting on your nerves by how... STUPID he is and can get

But..who wouldn't be when he couldn't understand basic math?

"So, do I just multiple this? Or..."

What did he mean by or ! There's a fricking × sign there...

"....Tsurugi..it's literally just 5×7-0,47. That's all you have to do."

He looked at his paper dumbfounded, then back at his notebook...then back at his paper before finally looking up at you...yeah he definitely didn't understand what you just said......

"Uh..can you say that again in a more....dumbed down way?"

Sometimes you wonder why you agreed to tutor him...

"...Tsu...what's 5×7..?"

He blinks for a few second...then he frowns as he thinks, then hesitantly answers.

"Uh...35...?"

Wow....the moron got something right for once, maybe cause you were about to beat him up the last time you were tutoring him and teaching him basic multiplication.

"Did you REALLY have to think for that long to answer what's 3×7...?"

"Hey!- I'm not good at math ok?-"

He huffed before going, surprisingly, silent...it was quiet for a few seconds before he spoke up again.

"...So what's 35-0,47 then?"

"You're not good at using your brain....and it's 34,53."

It was amusing how he stared at you dumbfounded for a few moments, before he looked at his notebook to check it himself. Surprise, surprise, you were right. Yet he was still dumbfounded by how easily you calculated that..

"H-how...did you do that so fast-?"

"It's grade school math at best, Tsurugi...."

After an overly dramatic groan....he put down his pencil, slouching back in his seat.

"Hey, not everyone can be a brainiac like you, y'know.."

"I'm not a braniac...I also struggle with big equations......"

With a scoff, you simply crossed your arms and looked at him..almost in a judging way

Probably judging how stupid he is

Yet... you wouldn't know how much he liked and adored the way you crossed your arms to look serious...

"....but that's like a...whole new world for you."

He rolled his eyes and lightly slapped your arm in retaliation, pouting like a 4 year old...

"Ha-ha hilarious ...not my responsibility to be good with math, I'm good with football-"

"How will football help in math or English?"

"I...I-"

He was at a loss for words...he didn't have a good comeback for that one. So he let out another frustrated groan before crossing his arms and pouting once more

"...shut up!...not my fault I'm good with sports and not good with words..."

A snort escaped out of your nose...and they way you grinned at him in that smartassed way..

"You're dumb, that's that. And I won't be mellifluous about it."

"I....am not dumb!- I just-"

Surprisingly, he let out another groan, frustrated at himself and the situation.

"And stop using your big words...I have no idea what you're saying-"

"Aaaah right right, I do solemnly apologise for using such a profound vocabulary on my dearest companion."

He put his face in his hands, groaning in frustration again, then took a few seconds to try and process what you just said before looking back up at you with his brows furrowed.

"Now you're just doing it on purpose..."

"Of course I'm doing it on purpose... you're stupid."

His eye..twitched in annoyance. So he leaned forward, resting his arms on the table as he stared at you with a frustrated but firm expression.

"Hey! I am not stupid, I'm just...not as smart when it comes to words and math and stuff...I'm good at football- at least..."

Then he leaned on to the table, his chin propped on his palm..

"..at least that's what I like to think."

That's when you chuckled... stood up, and took your school bag off the library table

"How about we pack up and finish tomorrow..? I don't want your little brain to fry.."

And with a genuine smile....you leaned down and kissed his cheek....

"See ya, Tsurugi...."

He didn't even have time to register that you left after that stunt you pulled

You left him...flabbergasted...brain short-circuiting when he whipped his head in your direction

Just to see you leave the school library...

Sure, he wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed, but he could admit he was whipped for you

Oh my goodness gracious! Idk why, but it kinda feels nice to be backkk

~Posted on July 3rd, 2024~

[coolstar-girl]

Ok… how do I put this… Ca, I’ve been following you for… I think a year now? Yeah a year. And I’ve seen your ups and downs and things that you have told us you’ve been through. And I just have to say one thing… FUCK ALL OF DEM. Excuse me for my language but forget everyone. I’de say listen to what you want and not the people that didn’t give you the want, no NEED to create Game 6. The people bringing you down are the ones that are going to be begging for you to come back. They want to see you fall. But you know what? Stand up to them. Matter of fact, if you wanted to, you could cancel Game 6 on us but not on yourself. Make your game six for you and you only. And if it makes you feel any better at all, if you were to stop making game 6 at all, your REAL fans will be right behind you. We love ALL of your projects, not just the 6. Each and every project is unique, beautiful, inspiring, and down right amazing to witness you create. A lot of those haters are hating because they just want to be you. A lot of them are hating because they are all smartasses who think they know what art is. A bunch are just annoying because they got a taste and want more. Those people are just impatient little b r a t s. I’m sorry that many of the people that notice you are all negative and/or pushy towards you. You don’t deserve that at all. You are literally one of THE BEST creators out here. No one can do what you do…. You know what? This world and the real people who love you for you are so fricking lucky to even be in your presence. I am thankful to have even seen your tiktoks of the Game 6, Adelaide, Barrington Manor, The Christmas Bell, the Candy Series that you have, Octonauts, and oh so much more. I’m happy you even wanted to make them in the first place. Thank you. Thank you so much. ^^ also, your doggo and catto are adorable. And HOW DID BARBIE FREEZE UP ON YOU, DID THAT GET FIXED!?!?

Drawing Game 6 is becoming painful to do.

Like, I’m beginning to resent the series entirely.

I know it brought me so much good fortune. And I can’t be more grateful for that.

But at the same time, it’s broken my spirit.

People constantly bothering me about it, begging for games to be included when I’m not interested, asking the dumbest questions (seriously how can you ask for a new member of Game 6 when that would make it not game 6 anymore.) and even my mother not leaving me alone about it.

I try to branch off into my original projects and it just keeps following me.

And anytime I put more effort into Game 6 it bombs so badly and it breaks me.

I get harassed to make it, and when I do it gets thrown in my face.

I don’t get it.

I know it’s selfish of me to want people to just show up and support but I’ve put hours of my life into this nonsense only to be stepped on.

I was told to kys because it was on someone’s bucket list to say that to a popular creator.

Bare in kind I have tried to do that, twice. It’s awful. It’s not flattering and glamours. It’s awful

I just wish people saw me for more than a stupid fan fiction

[bowieandqueen11]

Resolved Issues / Roman Roy Imagine

Request: HIIIII gonna send my succession request while i still can lol.

how about roman and reader sharing childhood stories? him realising that perhaps, maybe the way his family has treated him is tiny bit Not Normal. the reader being somewhere between "oh my god let me give you a hug" and "i just might fight logan roy in the parking lot". yknow good old hurt/comfort you do it like no other

Thank you so much sweetie!! But also yes I feel this in my soul frick Logan Roy lmao 

Warning: strong language. mentions of diarrhoea and mentions of child abuse/ physical abuse! 

This 3k beast took quite a while to write, so feedback is appreciated! Thank you! :)

(I do not own Succession or its characters, all rights go to creators. Gif credit goes to @loverboyromanroy.)

☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°

Roman shrugs his shoulders and looks steadily at you, straight into your eyes.

‘The fuck- how should I know? Like... twenty three, ish?’

Roman’s perching on the edge of his own sofa, so obviously uncomfortable even in his own apartment. His wrist flicks as he answers, and a few drops of the whiskey he hasn’t touched comes sloshing round the side to stain his brand new eggshell blue decorative pillows. He had never cared much for property. But then again, he hadn’t cared much for whiskey either growing up; it had been his father’s drink of choice, and therefore his. The faint fire in the cold marble fireplace behind his head licks between his ears, and illuminates the confused amusement gleaming in his eyes.

You scoff, and shake your head at him incredulously. ‘You own twenty three houses, and you choose to live here?’ Awaiting an answer you know will be even more ridiculous, you make an effort to tuck your legs criss-cross under you, and sit with your knees resting just underneath Roman’s lower legs. ‘And yet you still live in the coldest ass apartment, I swear to god I’m freezing my ass off, and that’s even with the fire going. Are you a fucking yeti or something, Roman Roy?’

He chortles as you continue: ‘you thrive in colder climates, huh? That’s not surprising, considering a glare from your father could freeze hell over.’ You take a final sip of your drink before reaching over and placing it on the sleek black coffee table; Roman’s eyes drop for a split second as if almost in despondency, some kind of deep scarred sorrow peeking its way out like a tired child, before rising back to yours, seeking comfort. It doesn’t slip your attention. You make sure your fingers brush against his socks as you slip your hands back to your lap, and give a sweet squeeze to the tippy toes. He lets out a giggle and kicks his foot out at you, and it’s the most delightful sound you’d ever hear: that true, unadulterated happiness that Roman Roy rarely ever is permitted to have, without some kind of malicious intention lurking behind it.

‘Okay, well, one’, he ostentatiously holds a finger up by twirling it in the air, and it takes you a second to realise he’s pointedly showing you his middle finger. ‘Fuck you. Two-’, he decides to count with his pinkie finger, ‘my dad owns twenty three hours, I own approximately zero fucking squilch of that. And three, I’m a fucking incredible designer - see that Feng Shui over there? All me baby, I would have fucking killed it as an interior design.’

‘Having one sad as fuck looking potted plant by the window and literally no personal items doesn’t count as Feng Shui, dumbass. You’re just sad.’

‘Okay - well - if you’re such a smartass-’, Roman winds his hands up by his head but nearly lets the crystal glass his brother had bought him for his last birthday fall onto the hardwood floor, so he grimaces and gently places it on the rug. He turns back to glance at you, and despite the fact he’s positioning himself as if he’s conducting an interview: elbows resting on knees with hands clasped out before him, face set in stone, he still looks intent and truthfully curious about the answer he’s hoping you’ll give. ‘What was your childhood home like then? I’m sure full of unicorns that shart rainbows and fucking fairies that sneeze glitter from the way you hate my deco.’

You pause to think for a minute, not fully expecting such an honest question to come from Roman Roy. You place a finger gingerly against your lip, and in that second, perched up on the edge of the pristine settee, Roman wishes he could just leap over and replace your fingertip with his lips. He had never been so entranced by someone: never had the privilege of knowing someone from this corporate world who would be so truthful, so different from him. And yet, at the same time, someone who so deliciously, so crudely, so cruelly reminded him of the young child locked in the cage within his heart: so unknowingly let him cling onto the little bit of him he had tried to keep alive. The only bit of him left that wasn’t a Roy. That was just Roman.

Yet, even in the hope that clouded his mind as he awaited your answer, your words came like slices to slit against his throat. ‘Well, I suppose my home was... well, not to sound pedestrian, or super corny, but it was a happy one?’ He nodded, content to bleed out in front of you. ‘There was usually a lot of laughter, and of course a lot of stress, but you know. We could all rely on each other. It was... yeah, it was nice.’ You stop, biting your bottom lip and switching your legs around so you could raise them up and pull them against your chest. 

You didn’t want to look at the man sitting before you suddenly. It was as if he had regressed into himself as you went along: withering, shivering slightly like a frosty chill over an empty playground. It looked - it felt unnatural, as he stared at you without seeing. He blinked languidly for a moment, soaking in your words, before jutting his bottom lip out and trying his best to grin at you. ‘Well, my childhood wasn’t so horrid either. My brother took me and Ken camping once, and although it was fucking sleeting down like bullets of pure fucking ice down by the stream, Connor did eat a fish that looked like a mouldy shoe and spent most of the night running off into the woods holding his ass.’

He snorts then, his little high pitched hyena laugh bubbling out of him as he places the back of his hand against his lips to try and hold it in, and you can’t help but laugh along with him at the sorry image of the supposed Roy brother patriarch scuttling around like a crab with diarrhoea. 

‘That’s sweet, but do you have any other actual memories with your family where someone isn’t being ridiculed?’

‘Woah, hey-’, he holds both his hands up, and slides down from the armrest to come sit in front of you. ‘When you meet my brother, you’ll understand that he deserves it.’ You flush slightly at the implication, becoming rather uncharacteristically bashful around Roman, and glancing quickly down between your legs. Pulling at a thread until it becomes loose, you pray the timid fire glow is enough to hide from him the rushing heat crawling up your neck. Due to the fact that Roman also is shyly looking down at the toes he’s currently wiggling to busy himself, you both miss the way the other is blushing. 

‘But...uh’, he starts finally after a moment of contemplation: a blessed few minutes of serendipitous indulgence, of growing warmth and familiarity, and just enough time for the two of you to realise how much your presence and conversation had only furthered endeared the two of you to each other, despite the hint of sadness that laced it. 

‘I really - I mean, my dad was like, always busy.’ He scratches the back of his head, embarrassed by the way you tilt your head and look quizzically at him. He becomes hyper aware of how close his knee is to resting against yours, and decides to swallow the fear that seems to be clogging up the back of his throat, and shuffles forward until there’s finally contact. ‘And my brother was like, following in his footsteps and all that jazz’, his eyes widen as he holds his hands out by his side. ‘So there wasn’t really much time for... fun, I guess. Or mistakes. Or family.’

It breaks your heart to watch him deflate once he finishes speaking, and suddenly the austere, cold walls and empty, hollow halls of his apartment make all the more sense. He looks so worn out, so tired of having to hide himself away behind a big, empty mansion full of props and antiques and nothingness all put out for show, because that’s what he was. That’s how he saw himself. A big, empty, tired, twisted puppet trying to bend over backwards to escape the marionette strings of daddy’s love, not realising they’re choking him. It was a strategy, a way to protect himself: to become placid, to mask yourself as being one of them, to fit in with his father’s lifestyle, and maybe then the slaps and strikes and kicks and whimpers would feel like something good. Because he’s trying to be just like his father. So if he’s hit, it’s only because the puppet hasn’t quite danced to the right tune, that’s all. 

As you glance around, you finally begin to notice how unused all the furniture in Roman’s apartment looks: the cellarette by the bar that looks as if it had been varnished yesterday, to the large screen television on the either side of the elongated room that Roman clearly only put on once a night to watch the news, to the velvet cushioned armchair positioned to sweep out and look across the skyline of the city, yet the headrest didn’t even have a dent. All these things. All this barrenness. It made you sick to your stomach. Here he was: a toy left on the shelf to collect dust, taken out to play with only when it suited the puppet master, and he was still so desperate for love that he still tried to copy his father. 

And you could see from the way his eyes were beginning to turn blood shot as he slowly sat there and turned the cogs in the back of his brain over, that this was a thought he had had many times before.

You try your best not to look at him too pitifully, in case he might take offence and retreat back into his shell again when you hold out your hands to him. He swallows thickly, watching your every movement as your fingers unfurl over his knees, and you signal at him to come closer. For a moment, as he squints his eyes at you, he seems tentative. But then you roll your eyes, trying your best to still seem casual, and flutter your fingers at him again. 

It takes less than a second for him to latch on this time, and his fingers grip into the sides of your skin so tightly you’re afraid he may draw blood. But then, you suppose, that’s all he’s been familiarised with.

‘It’s fine, I’m fine’, he tries to shrug it off, but his fingers only squeeze into yours all the more desperately. Worried he’ll try and pull away if you keep them suspended between your touching knees, you slowly pull them down to rest on your lap as he continues talking. He begins to play with your fingers almost subconsciously, looping them through his stout ones. ‘I mean, sure, my earliest memory is Shiv trying to drown me in the pool because she didn’t want so many older brothers to take all of daddy’s attention away from her. And Ken was never really present, dad was always shipping him away to some conference training or having him sit at his feet like his lap dog, but it’s fine. I’m fine. I grew up to be a well adjusted adult without any concerning issues at all.’

Although his tone is mocking, once he’s finished his rambling thought he lets go of your hand to rub his eyes. He does a half-yawn to try and cover the fact that they’re becoming rather bleary - to hide the fact that this is beginning to get at him, actually. And he’d rather stop now, if that’s alright. He’s the jokester in the family. The happy man. The go to cheer-upper. The pathetic one. He didn’t want to cry. He didn’t want to cry in front of you. He was never allowed to cry.

He jumps when he feels your hand against his knee, and he sniffles slightly when he looks down and sees you’ve leaned closer towards him. ‘And your dad?’, you ask quietly, cautiously, pulling the hand of his you were still holding tightly into your sternum. ‘What was he like growing up?’

‘Well, I was annoying. I- I am annoying, so, you know-’

He chokes then, and this time he can’t stop the sob that breaks out from the back of his throat like an overdue bell chime.

‘I’m annoying. I’m fucking annoying, you know that?’, he chokes out between sobs, doubling over on himself, but he’s still laughing between each gasping breathe. ‘I’m such a piece of shit’, he states, doing his best to stop his lip from wobbling and the tears from clouding out of his eyes, but he doesn’t complain when you take your hand off his lap and guide it to the small of his back, just before the dip in his shoulder blades. Gently - ever so gently, as if you were cradling a new born child still so unused to human touch, you guide him down to lie on your legs. He goes easily, taking his hands back to lean them under his chin, and allowing you full utility of your fingers. You put them to good use, beginning to stoke back stray curls of his mother’s hair away from his face, tucking them behind his ear until his breathing evens again.

He watches the sun fall over the edge of the Waystar Royco building: a sight he has seen many times before, but one that feels all the more eerie as the slates of dark metal blot out the light like a flashy tomb.

You bring him back, pursing your lips together and trying not to laugh sorrowfully as he sneezes at the feel of your finger moving down his forehead to trace over the dip of his nose, and evidently tickle it. You move onto the curve of his left eye, and it fills you with at least a little comfort to notice the way he squeezes his eyes shut at the movement. What was less welcome, though, were the few pearly tears that slipped past the cracks of his eyes and began to trace down the old bruised shaped hollows of his cheeks.

‘God Roman’, you choke out, trying to gently turn his head so he’s looking up at you. For a moment, he throws a tantrum and shakes his head in refusal, but your fingers are unrelenting and all forgiving against the side of his jaw, and soon he can’t help but give in to the love he’s so desperately begging for. He allows you to turn him, still squirming in your touch, until the two of you make eye contact. And there’s such naivety there, such desire and craving and conviction and belief as he keeps his eyes trained wholly on yours, that the words just come tumbling out of your mouth.

‘I’m going to fight your whole family I swear. I’m going to fight them all, one by one, and then take over Waystar, maybe find out what the fuck is going on between this Cousin of yours and Shiv’s husband’, he chortles at that, and chokes a little, ‘and then the two of us can burn the place to the ground and ride off into the sunset.’

Although he feels only elation at your words, he starts to shake when you use the pads of his thumbs to gently, tenderly wipe the tears away from beside his nose.

‘Stop, please’, he whimpers, but you know he’s not talking about your physical actions. ‘My dad’s never going to die, even if he is gone. Just- just- get out while you can, okay? Just fucking run.’ He grabs up at your hands, and holds onto one intently. ‘Just fucking go, okay, because I will destroy you. I’m- fucking poison, alright?’

‘No, no’, you state more firmly, when you see the creases in his forehead begin to appear. He shakes his head, and his whole face crinkles up when you admit the one thing left unspoken between the two of you.

‘You - you’re worth it. You’re worth putting up with all of this for, Roman Roy. One day, you’ll be free, and we’ll get to make new memories. Better ones.’

‘Just shut up. Shut the fuck up. Please. Just-’

His words die out on his mouth when you lean down swiftly and replace them with your waiting lips. His hand falls from where it was encircling your wrist, and after a moment of stunned shock, comes up to press firmly against the nape of your neck. His widened eyes melt slowly into a blissful, languid close, and despite the fact that he has no fucking idea how to actually kiss someone he cares about, he does a mighty good job of latching onto your bottom lip and whimpering when you go to pull away.

‘You promise’, he whispers into the tense air between the tip of your nose and the side of his stubble. He leans up to kiss you again, and a bite of saltiness stings at your mouth. ‘You promise’, he murmurs again as he opens his mouth, refusing to break away from the kiss: instead breathing you in and licking the tip of his tongue against your own. Steadying yourself, you grip onto his biceps, and press a last, ardent kiss to his mouth by latching onto his top lip.

‘I swear, Roman, I swear to god I’m going to make up for all the lack of love your family has given you. And I’ll start right now.’

[itsyourstarboy]

✧.*Listener OC*⁠.⁠✧

.•°•.★Job Headcanons★°•.•°

!!!This is headcanons for my listener ocs, not for the listeners in general!!!

CW: Some NSFW themes, gendered listeners

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Darlin: Did a few odd jobs before rejoining the pack, now he works with Shaw Security

Freelancer: Before he went to DAMN, he was an... Uh... escort of sorts? (What I'm trying to say is he'd give people blowjobs in alleyways for 20 bucks) Now he works part time at a library, and sometimes takes up empowered freelancing jobs.

Cutie: Canonically has a job; works for DUMP. Before that, he worked at a cafe :3

Sweetheart: Canonically has a job; private investigator for DUMP. Before that, he worked part time at an animal shelter.

Babe: Canonically has an office job. She works in the tech department at Vesta.

Angel: Canonically has an office job. They work in graphic design; mainly for billboards.

Lovely: Before she met Vincent, she was a college student majoring in photography. Worked part time at a diner. She is now unemployed, as after she moved in with Vincent she never needed to provide for herself ever again.

Starlight: Student at DAMN. Does empowered freelancing jobs to buy groceries.

Smartass: Canonically has an office job. That's all I know.

Honey: Canonically has a job; what exactly that is has yet to be confirmed. All we know is that said job sent Honey out on a business trip, but that could mean anything. That being said, you can pry my streamer!honey headcanon out of my cold dead hands. So frick you, Honey is a streamer.

Warden: Canonically has a job; works for DUMP. ✧⁠*⁠。t h e r a p i s t 。*✧⁠

Sunshine: I don't remember if they canonically have a job or not, but this bitch writes books.

Okay that's all my listener ocs, any that are missing are just not important 💅💅

Feel free to reblog with your own listener's job headcanons, I like seeing what people imagine the listeners doing for work ^_^

[1think1twasvodk4]

hello there and welcome to why sirius black and baji keisuke are the same fricking people

(apart from that they look like each other)

they are both sassy little bitches and drama starters

they are both very badass

they both have cool smartass hot boyfriends that were never the same after their deaths

they are like stupid af most of the time

but they are actually the ones who care about their friends the most and if you hurt them they can and will beat the shit out you

(the way sirius cares about james is the same way baji cares for mikey change my mind💥)

oh and i even found a cool picture of baji and sirius i mean look literal besties

yep thats it

have an ice day

not my fanarts💥

[smilingperformer]

Little rant under the cut I'll end up deleting at later date.

I hate how the pokemon fandom now seems to have fights over the name Liko like I've seen precure fandom have over it and all the reasons on people saying "it's Riko" is like, god damn it people, she's not from Kanto therefore her name being japanese based isn't actually a common sense lol. It's not a disrespect or translation error is the freaking ANIMATION STUDIO USES IT.

Japanese language doesn't have la li lu le lo. That is correct. But that's why they use ra ri ru re ro for any foreign names. Names like Laura La Mer (example from Tropical-Rouge! Precure), Lilie, Gladio, Lusamine, Alan, Lei, you name it. Had this clip actually said a very clear Riko, I would go with it. But it does NOT say Riko. It says Liko. I've listened to it more times than necessary. She's confirmed paldean. Therefore her name is supposed to be foreign. Not japanese-origin. If she was Kantonese, I'd assume Riko too.

I don't know why I get so frustrated about this asfjghsfhghf. It's not like the studio itself wouldn't know how to write their character's name. Even Pokémon press site specifically states the names Liko and Roy are on the japanese version. Specifically. Meaning they could have different dub names.

I guess seeing people go and try to correct people using Liko with "it's Riko because this and that" is so fricking annoying because like... think. Think. Why do people use Liko? Because that's the official reveal. If every reliable translator is using it (and they are), then it is Liko.

And yes, in Maho Tsukai Precure Cure Magical is Liko, not Riko. She's not japanese either, she's a witch from magical world. There are sooooo many examples of names in japanese media that are meant to be la li lu le lo but are written with ra ri ru re ro due to them being closest. The name's pronounciation tends to be confirmed in merchandise. I guess for this debate to end there needs to be an article from magazine or merchandise of her that clearly shows Liko. Animedia and Spoon.2Di at least like to show the romanji form of their names in articles.

I'm also more and more convinced that Liko meaning a leaf bud in Hawaiian origin is not a coincidence with Sprigatito being her partner. It's a perfect match.

I know it's stupid to be so hung up on this. I don't even know why I'm hung up on this. Probably because there are so many smartasses who think they know better than the fricking announcer of the name. Like what lol. I trust the animation studio announcement hella lot more.

(Ok sure merchandise shows Gladio is Glazio and I know most of us prefer Gladio because of the name origin, but that still keeps the la instead of ra)

No allowed reblogs because I'm not gonna discuss this further I just hate how many try to contradict official info lol. I'll try to calm down on this topic after this as well, so. I'm not telling people to not use Riko if they really want to use it, but DON'T try to correct other people to say Liko is wrong, because clearly it's not. Riko is technically wrong but only if you don't write it as リコ lol.

[hannahhook7744]

Moxford Frankenstein-Van Helsing's application;

Name: Moxford William Frankenstein-Van Helsing.

Known Aliases: Moxie Frankenstein-Van Helsing, Will Van Helsing, Wilford Frankenstein, The Night Guard, Frankenstein Jr, Frankenstein's monster #2, Frankenboy, The Wendino, Frankengo, and the back up night guard.

Nicknames or Other: Moxie, Mox, Moxie boy, Moxie Bear. no one calls me that. not true. Hope calls you that. She's the only one who gets to keep her teeth when she does. ,Rager, Buster, Tank, Tiger, Bull head, force, Hot head, Clock, Tantrum, and bombshell. You guys suck at nicknames. If you want good nicknames write you own application. Oh shut up.

Date of Birth or Best Guess: 15 years ago on November 21st.

Place of Birth: Van Helsing Mannor on the isle. Where else? You don't have to be so rude. It's a stupid question, of course I have to be rude, Howiee!

Favorite Color: Red. Maroon to be specific.

Favorite Activity: Playing sports, buliding miniatures, listening to music, doing magic tricks, playing the harmonica, keeping Rian away from water, and listening to Hope sing. They only asked for one. Does it look like I care?

Favorite School Subject: Scheme Management 101 and Advanced Vanities.

Father's Name (or alias): Dr. Victor fricking pysco Frankstein.

Mother's Name (or alias): Elsa no care Van Helsing.

Father's Profession: Mad wacko Scientist. Will you stop crossing everything I write out? NO.

Mother's Profession: Professor. Of Literature. Why did you even cross that out?

You were being sarcastic. It's not hard to tell.

So what if I was?

This attitude isn't gonna get you into Auardon.

Maybe I don't want to go to Auardon, ever think of that?

You're lying. You wanna go and you know it.

Why would I want to go? It's stupid and bright and condescending over there.

Because Hope wants to go there and you'll go anywhere she goes..

Well, Hannah will get us in over there no matter what we say. So I'm not worried.

Well you got me there.

Who is your favorite of the first wave of VKs? There is no wrong answer.

This is a stupid fucking question and I refuse to answer. Moxie! What?! It's true. It's a completely useless question! Who has a favorite peer? Just answer!Fine!

Hannah. My favorite vk is Hannah.

There are you happy?!

Very.

In your own words, tell us why you want to come to Auradon. There is no wrong answer. 

Because Hope wants to come to Auradon and she's my girlfriend and I will do anything that makes her happy. And because I want to see Hannah again and make sure she's okay and safe. Because that's part of my job and she's kind of like my younger sister or cousin.

Finally you admit it.

Shut up smartass.

Signature:

Moxie F.V.H.

[artofapeach]

Did you read the rest of the epithet switched scripts yet?

HI HELLO YES I HAVE OMG

Okay okay okay okay this is going to be a MESS of a post. I have SOOOOOOOOOO many thoughts.

First of all, Sylvie!! Holy crap I love him as a detective. AND the fact that he’s Percy’s adopted father??? Charming. Beautiful. I smiled at every interaction and mention of them. And Percy still being a lawful good wannabe cop, probably to try to copy her father?? Gosh she’s sweet.

Fave part of the Museum arc is still Mera and Indus. I KNEW the amulet would still be for Mera, but I was still all :shocked pikachu: when it was revealed. I like how Indus had a curse too of not being able to feel things; UNLESS it was for Mera, and he just wanted to be able to heal her???? I just, it’s so sweet, I love it. Dare I say I love it more than the original dynamic?? I just, they make me wanna cry 🥺

Then, the part I was REALLY excited for; the Western arc.

Hoo boy. Zora. I was so excited for her! And I did end up liking her! Really!! I liked seeing how she used her epithet in different ways to con people. Butttt her character was a bit underwhelming? I guess she really shines best as a bounty hunter. As a con artist, she didn’t have that same hypocrite lawful evil attitude that original Zora had. She was still goofy and kickass, but I still like original Zora best~

Zora and Sylvie’s relationship was also a bit of a downgrade compared to Ramsey and Percy. They worked well together, but it didn’t have the same unlikable buddies or anything. They were too…normal together? In fact, I think that’s the main issue I had with the arc, is that it lost a lot of its zaniness. Which sometimes can’t be helped, and I did appreciate the new jokes written for it! For some reason, I’m obsessed with the joke where Sylvie tossed the Canadian dollar into the well and was just absentmindedly like “Make a wish” and Zora goes “I wish not to die” and Sylvie’s like “Wait, what?” It’s literally the simplest, dryest joke—which is why I love it. I have such an appreciation for dry humor; wish there was more between the two of them. I think that could have worked well!

Yoomtah and Howie HOLY SHIT. I did NOT expect them to be the switch. But I freaking loved it! It worked soooooo well!! Instead of Yoomtah and Sylvie being friendly rivals, they just run into each other a lot in Sylvie’s work (much to Sylvie’s dismay). It’s great and I loved their relationship.

I also really appreciated how the epithets were repurposed for the new situation! I knew the sheriff’s (who is now the Vice President) epithet could be useful if practiced in creative ways. And I also didn’t think about how Zora could stop the process of moving itself for a person and just make them freeze. Badass bitch I love you.

But the BEST part I saved for last.

Yup. Ramsey.

Hoooooooly shiiiiiiit how did they make this goofy uncle dude into a goofy bad ass?? Unlike Zora, he still kinda felt like Ramsey! He just really worked well in the bounty hunter position. He was able to make his goofy jokes and smartass remarks while being kinda capable at his job! And, again, though I had predicted it, I was still all :surprised pikachu: when he used his power to turn his victims to gold. And the fact he can make it melt and essentially kill someone that way?? Hooooooo man, I need a minute…

But the BEST BEST part I saved for double last.

I cannot believe I am saying this. I cannot believe this was my fave part of the entire AU.

But I fricking loved Ramsey and Sylvie’s relationship.

Their dynamic worked SO well!! Sylvie just trying to do his job and Ramsey poking fun at him?? God dammit, Ramsey, why do you work so well with cops??

These are nowhere near all my thoughts, but my phone’s about to die ww all in all it was really good and well done and I applaud the writer 👏🏽

[insaneasgardian]

Smartass Answer

Sam: How was your History test Y/N?

Y/N: I got 99%, I missed ONE fricking mark.

Sam: That's a very good grade! Just out of curiosity, what did you get wrong?

Y/N: There was a question asking what ended in 1896.

Bucky: And?

Y/N: I wrote 1895

Bucky: I have taught you well

[biclarisselarue]

congrats on 1k! 💓 “tell me a secret.”

They’re laying out in the strawberry fields, Sally’s picnic blanket spread out underneath them with warm winds gently blowing across bare skin, when Annabeth looks up from her spot on Percy’s chest.

“Tell me a secret.”

He keeps his eyes on the stars but twists his mouth slightly in thought. “What do you want to know?” 

A light finger taps alongside his ribs, slowly finding each ridge, each dip and swell. “How am I supposed to know if it’s a secret, Seaweed Brain?”

His quiet laugh fills the still air, and she grins, loving how light he can sound even after everything they’ve been through. Percy tightens his grip on her back slightly, one hand gently sweeping over the muscles of her back, keeping her warm, the other holding just above her waist, firm and grounding.

“Okay then, smartass.” There’s a pause, but it doesn’t feel like she’s waiting for anything in particular— each moment that passes in silence is a moment she savours, like eating the last muffin from your baking, knowing you’re out of flour in the pantry. It’s nice just to lay there and listen to him breathe, feel his chest move up and down with each new inhale and exhale. Annabeth can’t remember the last time she felt this kind of happy— sated, without a single thought to the future.

“Oh, okay, got one. Remember before,” she watches his Adam’s apple bob as he swallows and reaches up to squeeze his shoulder, “um, before Beckendorf died?”

She nods, knowing he can feel the motion, not wanting to break his silent determination.

“When he came to get me, Rachel kissed me.” Percy’s gaze upwards seems more deliberate now, and she takes her time thinking of a response, letting one finger twirl the short hairs at the base of his neck absent-mindedly.

“Was it good?” She makes sure it’s teasing, no heat to be found.

It startles a short laugh out of him, and he finally looks down at her, eyes full of mirth, returning her tone in equal measure with a: “You worried?”

“More envious, honestly, she always seemed to have soft lips from how much lip balm she used. Still uses, frankly.”

They grin at each other, each a bit incredulous at just how lucky they are to have this. 

“Considering how it was moments before we flew off to Luke’s ship, I was a little distracted.” Annabeth lets herself have a second to marvel at how that name no longer makes her flinch before pulling herself up so she’s lying fully on top of him, legs straddling his waist and head blocking his view of the sky. The way he smiles up at her as if she’s a much better sight makes something clench tightly inside her chest.

“You didn’t answer my question.” She quirks an eyebrow down at him, trying to stop a smile from completely overtaking her.

Percy lifts one hand from where they found the curve of her waist to tap his chin, pretending to think. “I would put it at number two for best kisses I’ve ever gotten, I think.”

“Oh?” Her heart sinks a little, but he’s still smiling up at her as if she’s hung the moon and stars, so she can’t find it in herself to be too worried.

“It’s still a far cry from the number one spot though. Which is, truly, every single kiss with you. They’re all tied for first place.” A soft kiss is placed at the corner of her mouth. “The sleepy ones when you first wake up and your breath is gross,” he grins wider when her eyes narrow, “the deep ones late at night, the messy ones when we finally get time to ourselves after spending all day at camp, even the small ones just before you go off and do something foolishly brave, like, oh, I don’t know, retrieve the fricking Athena Panthenos all on your own.”

Percy’s eyes soften the way they always do right before he says something that will unlock another part of her heart for him to hold. “You amaze me, you know that right? I’ve never met anyone like you, and, to be quite clear, that includes the way you kiss. You’re it for me, and I wouldn’t change that for the world— I wouldn’t change any of us, any of you for the world.”

She doesn’t quite know how to say what she’s feeling, as if something large and heavy has been dropped into her stomach, as if she could face a million Arachne’s if only she had his voice and those words in her ear, so she leans down to kiss him properly. 

“I love you,” she whispers, hoping he’ll catch everything she’s trying to say within those three words. I adore you, I would do anything for you, please don’t break my heart. And, of course, you’re it for me, too.

[toneskie]

Sorry for the messy sketch I don't have much time but as I said, I'M FRICKING IN LOVE WITH FINN AND HAD TO DRAW THEM.

Also sorry for the handwriting I'm left handed and a lot of us have a bad handwriting ;^;

Also I feel like Finn's a big punk dumbass who can switch to smartass real quick but stays dumb most of the time lol

[hikaridemina]

I wrote a short thing since we’re finally getting summer weather over here and it’s been on my mind of how Fizz would handle overheating.

With my OC ship thrown in of course cause I have no shame.

-----------------------------------

"Hello and welcome to the channel 666 weather forecast! If you thought Hell was hot already, wait until you see this shit! There will be record highs across all seven rings today, with Greed and Envy reaching temperatures not seen in decades. So to those in the latter, try not to boil to death in your smelly ass swamp."

"Holy shit," Demina muttered to herself as she listened to the TV while in the process of plugging in a tall fan in the corner of the living room.

"I swear to fucking frick I'm going to kill someone if the air conditioning in this place doesn't get fixed."

She swiped her bangs to the side that had been stuck to her forehead with sweat. Even though she was only wearing a bra and panties, she was still smeltering in the hot apartment. She turned to check on Fizz who had been sitting naked on the couch, or as naked as he could be without certain... parts showing, he was also unusually quiet the entire time. That was already a cause for concern. He was leaning on the arm rest with his head propped up on his hand, tongue hanging out a bit as he slowly panted like a dog.

Yeah, something was definitely not right. She went to sit down next to him and could hear a loud whirring noise coming from the robot, she hadn't noticed it before with all the fans running on high in the room. She looked at him with great concern and reached a hand out to put on his shoulder.

"Hey, are you- YOW!"

Demina felt a scorching heat as soon as she had touched the metal and immediately withdrew her hand. The yelp caught Fizz's attention and he looked at her in surprise, but before he could say something she yelled again.

"You're fucking HOT!"

He had stopped panting for a moment to make a strained smile in her direction.

"Tell me something I don't know, babe."

"Goddammit this isn't the time to be a smartass," her response was a bit muffled as she had practically stuck all of her fingers in her mouth to soothe them. Fizz let out what sounded like a weak chuckle as he leaned forward and covered his face with both hands. The whirring sound had also gotten even louder.

"Yeah you're right, I feel like shit."

Now she was really fucking worried. The fact that he was suffering like this from the heat and most likely in danger was tearing her up. She needed to cool him down somehow, and fast.

She quickly figured something to try.

"I've got an idea, come on," she got up and grabbed hold of one of his hands, thankfully whatever material it was made of wasn't scorching like the metal on his shoulder. She led him into the bathroom and slid open the glass door of the shower to gently shoved him inside, he didn't have the energy to question it or put up a fuss. Demina reached in and turned on the tap, hoping a cold shower would help him at least a little.

Fizz leaned with his hands on the tile wall, eventually pressing his forehead against it as well. After a few minutes of having the water rain over him, the ungodly noise from his internal fan steadily quieted down to almost nothing. He let out a relieved sigh. The cool water felt so good now after it seemed like he was going to figuratively die from overheating. Demina also relaxed, smiling at him from outside the shower.

"Better?"

"Better, thanks Dems," he stood up straight and wiped the water from his face with his hand. His fabric covered jester ears were also now flopped down from being wet, those things would be a pain in the ass to dry later but that was the least of both their worries. He tilted his head and smiled at her.

"Aren't you gonna get in here?"

Demina blinked, she hadn't really thought of needing to shower herself but it probably wasn't a bad idea at this point. She reached back in to grab the tap.

"Sure, I just need to adjust the-"

Without warning Fizz coiled his arms around her and yanked her under the cold running water, cackling when she shrieked as her ears stood straight up from the shock.

"YOU ASS!"

"Love you too," he chuckled as she tried to push off of him, though after the shock wore off she had also started to laugh a bit.

“Fuck I’ll get you back for that.”

“Oooh, can’t wait.~”

[demomonic-murmurs]

I'm a sucker for werewoofs. If you wouldn't mind, could I get werewolf with a side of 'cuddle for warmth'. Maybe some mutual pining on the side?

"Are you sure it's fine?", Ulfric asked.

[Name] snorted. "I have the choice of dying a horrible death and turning into an ice statue or snuggle with my big, warm werewolf best friend. Of course I choose the first option."

Ulfric rubbed his neck and let out an awkward laugh.

"Who would've guessed that the snow storm would roll over so fast?", [Name] mused before plopping onto the couch, "I suppose there are worse people to be stuck with, right Ulfric?"

Could they hear his beating heart? It was thumping so loudly, Ulfric was scared it would jump right out of his chest.

"Yeah totally", he responded, "Do you want to eat or drink anything?"

"Nah not right now. Right now I'm just cold so come here big guy", they murmured, opening their arms to beckon him closer.

Ulfric swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat and moved to lay next to them, carefully to avoid hurting them with his large frame. [Name] cuddled close, burying their nose into his hairy chest. Their smell was overwhelming for him, the cinnamon and pine tree easily putting his mind at ease.

"Definitely worse people. Still cold as frick though", [Name] breathed out, the cold air hitting his exposed chest and sending shivers down his spine, not necessarily because it was could but more so because of them.

"If you're still cold I could grab you a shirt of mine or something", Ulfric whispered, attempting to not disturb the peaceful atmosphere.

[Name] chuckled, turning their head upwards in order to be able to look him in the eyes. "Ya know, I would never turn down the offer of wearing something from you", he drew in a sharp breath, "But having the real deal is a lot better. Wouldn't want you to stand up for me. Besides, gives me an excuse to cuddle even closer."

Crap, where they always this forward? Did they know what they were doing to him with that smirk of theirs?

[Name] giggled at his dumb founded expression. "Cat got your tongue, puppy? I'm thankful for the storm, was looking for an excuse to cuddle with you...", they trailed off, resting one hand on his broad chest, "besides your heart seems to agree."

Of course they could feel it, they were so close after all.

"Can I kiss you?", Ulfric blurted out, his eyes widening at his own question, "Sorry that was a dumb question, just ignore it-"

His train of apologies were interrupted by [Name] cupping his face and kissing his nose.

"Sorry did you mean a real kiss or a dog kiss? I couldn't tell, really, you ought to use your words more and stop apologizing."

Ulfric let out a frustrated growl, their cheeky smile only fueling him more.

"You know what I meant", he said bashfully, pounting like a child.

"Of course I know what you meant", they giggled again, "You just have to phrase it better. A 'Oh dearest [Name] would thy lips be the kindest and grace mine'?"

Ulfric snorted. "That impression of me isn't even good in the first place, plus that isn't even correct shakespearean language."

"Psh Literature nerd", they teased, before their expression turned uncharacteristically serious,"Do you mean it though? Do you really want to kiss me, because I don't think I can stop myself from falling in love with you. Well more than I already am anyway I guess."

For a moment, the room was silent. Ulfric blinked, unable to believe their words.

"I really, really want to. Like really really. I've been thinking about it ever since we graduated high school, you know."

And for the first time in his life, Ulfric could watch a blush coating [Name's] cheeks. He had never ever seen them embarassed before, to think that such simple honesty was what had broken them was unthinkable.

"Oh", was all [Name] could say.

Smartass, silver tongued [Name], always having a reply in the back of their head, was speechless.

"Besides", Ulfric teased, "I don't want you to stop falling in love with me. Please, fall as hard as you can."

He leaned down and pecked their lips, before smiling shyly. [Name] let out a squeak, before burying their face back into his chest.

"Stupid Ulfric and his stupid charm", [Name] grumbled, "I guess it can't be helped. Someone has to watch out for you I guess. You're just a puppy after all."

Ulfric let out a hearty laugh before pulling them closer and burying his nose into their hair. For the first time he let himself get completly lost in their scent.

"Though that now that whole confession thing is out of the way", [Name], mumbled, their voice back to old mischief, "there are other ways you could warm me up with."

Oh. There they were. That didn't seem half bad at all.

[order-of-river-phoenix]

Could you possibly write some jealous Chuckler 👀 I don’t think I’ve ever read a jealous Chuckler fic! No worries if not ♥️♥️

Save Your Love; Lew “Chuckler” Juergens

Fandom: HBO War; The Pacific

A/N: oh boy. You literally caught me in the most opportune (?) time for this. I’ve listened to “Susie Save Your Love” like a bajillion times in the past 2-3 days. And it was rlly good inspiration. However, I must apologize that it’s so fricking short. Thank you for requesting this bc I was so excited to write it! 💕

Warnings: a little bit of hurting?

Taglist: @liebegott @stressedinadress @hellitwasyoufirstsergeant @floydtab @hbohmygodx @meteora-fc @alienoresimagines

__________

The second he saw you smile, Lew knew he was in deep. You were with the other medics, going over supplies, when someone cracked a joke, and he saw you from nearly 20 feet away, but you were all he could see. He couldn't explain why you stuck out to him, but something about that smile. God.

"What brought you out here?" had been the first thing he asked when he finally caught you by yourself.

You had to keep yourself from snorting. "A boat, same as you."

Scratching the back of his neck, he let out a laugh. "Alright. Let me rephrase: what made you decide to join?"

"Everyone's doing their part," you shrugged. "Working in a factory wasn't what I wanted my part to be."

He only nodded, taking in your words.

"What about you?" Small talk was never your strong suit, but he was a good sport about your previous smartass answer, so he deserved it. "No, let me guess, you're here for the all-expenses-paid, tropical vacation."

"How'd you know?" He stuck out his hand, a gesture you weren't used to from men. "My name's Lew, but my buddies call me Chuckler."

"Do I have the honor of being one of your buddies?"

"We'll see."

You had to hand it to him, he could give it about as well as he could take it.

This first interaction only resulted in you developing a second shadow. Any spare time he had, Chuckler was following you around, asking questions and falling for you, one sarcastic remark at a time.

It had been movie night, and he went looking for you the second the screen went black. He found you alone in your bunk, just sitting there.

"I lied before. You know, when we first met, and you asked why I came. Sure, a little bit was the cause. The pride in knowing I helped, but I followed a boy here," you admitted, unprompted. "My boyfriend from back home. I saw him today." You looked up at him, tears welling up. "He didn't look twice. Like he didn't even know me. Like I wasn't the last person he saw before he left town."

He'd never felt so sick. The pain he could see in your face was only part of it. The other half came from his more selfish self. He had thought- God.

No one empathized with you more right now than he did.

Knowing that your heart was in the —dirty, rotten, manhandling—hands of another when he knew how good he could take care of it, it was all almost too much too bear. He wasn't an angry man, by any means, but Lord help the fool that hurt someone he loved. Was his anger fueled by his love for you or by his jealousy of this asshole, he couldn't tell. He didn't care anyway.

"What's his name?"

"What?" When you looked at him, you saw something in him you had yet to see before. You couldn't place it, but it scared you a little. "Why?"

He clenched his jaw slightly before softening up again at the sight of your concern. "Just curious." Whatever he had planned on doing to What's-his-name had dissipated from his mind, for now.

You weren't sure what he wanted with the information, but you told him the name. The name that had once tasted so sweet when you whispered it to yourself at night now left a bitter numbness.

He nodded and sat down next to you. His arm found its way around you, swallowing you into a hug. He almost couldn't help the action. It was his knee-jerk reaction.

And you weren't about to object. With your face pressed against his chest, you closed your eyes and just let him hold you.

"I know this sounds so stupid," you mumbled into his shirt. "But I just can't believe I've wasted so much on him. I just want to take it all back and give it to someone else."

"Save your love," he whispered. For someone like me. He gave you one last squeeze before loosening his hold on you.

You almost always had a response, but the words weren't coming to you now.

"You need some rest," he told you gently.

"But-" You stopped yourself and nodded. “Okay.”

He gave you the best smile he could muster, which was never difficult for him, and he felt his heart melt like a popsicle when you returned it.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” With that, he got up and let himself out. He had some things to take care of. Maybe you’d be mad when you found out and never speak to him again, but he’d fallen in love in the worst place imaginable. This was for his own satisfaction. What’s-his-face was about to meet a less-gentle version of the hands that wanted to hold your heart.

[consumedkings-archive]

OC Speech Mannerisms

tagged by @strafethesesinners skfdj thank u darling!!!

Elliot Honeysett

# 𝙾𝙵 𝚂𝙿𝙾𝙺𝙴𝙽 𝙻𝙰𝙽𝙶𝚄𝙰𝙶𝙴𝚂: 1 / 2 / 3+ (that’s right baby elliot knows SPANISH)

𝚃𝙾𝙽𝙴 𝙾𝙵 𝚅𝙾𝙸𝙲𝙴: high / average / deep.

𝙰𝙲𝙲𝙴𝙽𝚃: yes / no. 

𝙳𝙴𝙼𝙴𝙰𝙽𝙾𝚁: confident / shy / approachable / hostile / other

𝙿𝙾𝚂𝚃𝚄𝚁𝙴: slumped / straight / stiff / relaxed.

𝙷𝙰𝙱𝙸𝚃𝚂: head tilting / swaying / fidgeting / stuttering / gesturing / arm crossing / strokes chin / er, um, or other interjections / plays with hair or clothing / hands at hips / inconsistent eye contact / maintains eye contact / frequent pausing / stands close / stands at distance. (the eye contact thing really depends on who he’s talking to and what they’re talking about.)

— 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐗𝐈𝐓𝐘.

𝚅𝙾𝙲𝙰𝙱𝚄𝙻𝙰𝚁𝚈: ⬛ ⬛ ⬛ ⬜️ ⬜️

𝙴𝙼𝙾𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽: ⬛ ⬛ ⬛ ⬛ ⬛

𝚂𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙴𝙽𝙲𝙴 𝚂𝚃𝚁𝚄𝙲𝚃𝚄𝚁𝙴: ⬛ ⬛ ⬜️ ⬜️ ⬜

— 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐅𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐘.

𝙵𝚁𝙴𝚀𝚄𝙴𝙽𝙲𝚈: ⬛ ⬛ ⬛️ ⬛️ ⬛

𝙲𝚁𝙴𝙰𝚃𝙸𝚅𝙸𝚃𝚈 (in regards to profanity): ⬛ ⬛️ ⬛ ⬛ ⬜️

𝐁𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐋𝐘.

arse. ass. asshole. bastard. bitch. bloody. bugger. bollocks. chicken shit. cock. crap. cunt. dick. frick. fuck. horseshit. motherfucker. piss. prick. screw. shit. shitass. son of a bitch. twat. wanker. pussy.

𝐆𝐈𝐕𝐄𝐍 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐏𝐄𝐑 𝐑𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐈𝐎𝐔𝐒 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐗𝐓.

christ on a bike. christ on a cracker. damn. goddamn. godsdamn. hell. holy shit. jesus. jesus christ. jesus h christ. jesus h. roosevelt christ. lord have mercy. jesus, mary and joseph. sweet jesus.

— 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐎𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓.

contractions or enunciation? straightforward or cryptic? jargon or toned? complexity or simplicity? finding the right word or using the first word that comes to mind? masculinity, neutrality, or femininity? formalities or abrasiveness? praise or equivocation? frankness or lies? excessive or minimal hand gestures? name-calling or magnanimity? friendly or blunt nicknames?

— 𝐈𝐌𝐏𝐎𝐑𝐓𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒.

𝙳𝙾 𝙿𝙴𝙾𝙿𝙻𝙴 𝙷𝙰𝚅𝙴 𝙰 𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙳 𝚃𝙸𝙼𝙴 𝚄𝙽𝙳𝙴𝚁𝚂𝚃𝙰𝙽𝙳𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙾𝚁 𝙷𝙴𝙰𝚁𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁? almost always / frequently / sometimes / rarely / never. (lmao the idea that someone would have a hard time hearing elliot...)

𝙳𝙾𝙴�� 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁’𝚂 𝙿𝙾𝙸𝙽𝚃 𝙲𝙾𝙼𝙴 𝙰𝙲𝚁𝙾𝚂𝚂 𝙴𝙰𝚂𝙸𝙻𝚈 𝚆𝙷𝙴𝙽 𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚈 𝚂𝙿𝙴𝙰𝙺? almost always / frequently / sometimes / rarely / never.

𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙸𝙽𝙸𝚃𝙸𝙰𝚃𝙴 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚅𝙴𝚁𝚂𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂? almost always / frequently / sometimes / rarely / never.

𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙱𝙴 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙾𝙽𝙴 𝚃𝙾 𝙴𝙽𝙳 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚅𝙴𝚁𝚂𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂? almost always / frequently / sometimes / rarely / never.

𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝚄𝚂𝙴 ‘𝚆𝙷𝙾𝙼’ 𝙸𝙽 𝙰 𝚂𝙴𝙽𝚃𝙴𝙽𝙲𝙴? yes / no / only ironically.

𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝚆𝙰𝙽𝚃𝚂 𝚃𝙾 𝙼𝙰𝙺𝙴 𝙰 𝙲𝙾𝚄𝙽𝚃𝙴𝚁𝙿𝙾𝙸𝙽𝚃. 𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝚆𝙾𝚁𝙳 𝙳𝙾 𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚈 𝚄𝚂𝙴? but / though / although / however / perhaps / mayhaps (when she feels like a smartass)

𝙷𝙾𝚆 𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙴𝙽𝙳 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝚅𝙴𝚁𝚂𝙰𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂? walk away / ask if that’s everything / say that’s everything / give a proper goodbye / tell their company they’re done here  / remain quiet / they don’t.

𝙷𝙾𝚆 𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙰𝙳𝙳𝚁𝙴𝚂𝚂 𝙾𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚁𝚂? titles / first names / surnames / full names / nicknames.

𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝚂𝙾𝙲𝙸𝙰𝙻 𝙲𝙻𝙰𝚂𝚂 𝚆𝙾𝚄𝙻𝙳 𝙾𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚁𝚂 𝙰𝚂𝚂𝚄𝙼𝙴 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝙱𝙴𝙻𝙾𝙽𝙶𝚂 𝚃𝙾, 𝙷𝙴𝙰𝚁𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝚃𝙷𝙴𝙼 𝚂𝙿𝙴𝙰𝙺? upper / middle / lower.

𝙸𝙽 𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃 𝚆𝙰𝚈𝚂 𝙳𝙾𝙴𝚂 𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝚆𝙰𝚈 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙲𝙷𝙰𝚁𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝚁 𝚂𝙿𝙴𝙰𝙺 𝚂𝚃𝙰𝙽𝙳 𝙾𝚄𝚃 𝚃𝙾 𝙾𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚁𝚂? accent / vocabulary / tone / level / politeness / brusqueness / it doesn’t.

i’m tagging @empirics @lilwritingraven @shallow-gravy @baeogorath @faithchel @chyrstis @ohfaiths @geronimo-11 @starcrier and anyone else who wants to play!! i’m sure some of you have gotten tagged more than once ♡

[britishchick09]

sherlock s2 ep 3 livewatch

it’s time for the sherlock s2 finale! i’ve been keeping lockie alive for as long as possible, but I can’t stall any longer. let’s fall into the reichenbach!

here it is:

the last masterpiece ep! :D

it begins with rain! *beatles ‘rain’ plays*

john’s back with the therapist from study in pink! :o

does this take place after the fall and the rest of the ep is a flashback?

it’s been 18 months!

john called tv ‘telly’:)

OMG HE’S CHOKING UP NO POOR BBY :’(

he called sherlock ‘my best friend’ IN THE SADDEST VOICE IN THE WORLD :’(

john: “sherlock holmes... is dead.” or is he? ;)

BAM INTRO!

guy: “falls of the reichenbach...” you dodged a credit roll with that one! ;)

sherlock: “diamond cufflinks. all my cufflinks have buttons.” john: “he means ‘thank you’. ...just say it.” awww what a parent :)

sherlock isn’t one for thanks and publicity!

the iconic hat! :D

EVERYONE WANTS HIM TO PUT THE HAT ON

he reluctantly put the hat on:)

the transitions from a scene to a newspaper is so cool! :D

john’s tabloid nickname is BACHELOR OMGGGGGG

john: “what do they mean by that?” oh you know what that means buddy ;)

CONFIRMED BACHELOR OMGGG VICTORIAN GAYYYYY!!!!!!!!!! (or in his case bi)

john: “we need to be more careful-“ johnlockers: “NO!!!!!”

sherlock is criticizing the hat lol :D

john called it the ‘sherlock holmes hat’ eyyyyy!!!!! ;D

john’s voice has a hint of deep love it ;)

there’s so many people touring at the castle! :o

this sneaky guy has this on his phone and i’m guessing that’s what all apps in the uk look like lol

OMG HE HACKED INTO THE SYSTEM

is it moiarty?

lestrade said ‘bloody ‘ell!’ and it was so british of him :D

he’s dancing to the background music YEP IT’S MOI ALRIGHT

YEET

OMG MOIARTY YOU DRAMA QUEEN

also is this an abominable bride reference? :o

john’s text notif sound sounds apple WHY

he has a windows laptop and an apple phone how chaotic

the smiley face!!!! :o

ooh cool american song playing in the background! :o

john: “ready?” sherlock: “yes” *PRESS CHATTER* how would anyone be ready for that?

sherlock wants to be himself but john’s like ‘no smartass’ LET HIM BE A SMARTHOLE JOHN

it’s the bbc! :D

OMFG A FAN FOLLOWED SHERLOCK INTO THE RESTROOM WTF

i bet johnlockers have actually done this because they were craaazyyyy back then...

THE FAN WANTS HIM TO SIGN HIS SHIRT WTFFFFF

sherlock knows she’s not a fan lol :D

wait is someone peeing in the background wtf

fan: “you and john watson, platonic, have you there as well!” mofftiss totally based this girl off of real johnlockers!!!!

can they please leave the bathroom I SWEAR SOMEONE IS PEEING BACK THERE IT’S SO AWKWARD

sherlock: “you... repel... me.” YAS!!! :D

HOLD UP what if this is mofftiss’ way of saying they don’t like johnlockers :o

now lockie’s in court bor-ing!

moiarty is a spider great metaphor sherlock! :D

judge: “how long-“ sherlock “not a good question.” lol :D

sherlock and moiarty knew each other for 5 minutes lol

who ate the wafer

SHUT UP WIG MAN LET SHERLOCK SHOW OFF

aaand he kicked them out

john: “you’re doing The Look again.” omg so married ♥

he finds The Face annoying lol MARRIEEEED

epic wallpaper! :D

OMG MOIARTY WAS CHEWING GUM DURING THE CRIME AND THE COURT THING DORK

and he looked at john... ;)

moiarty’s out and sherlock beeps john away,,,

he be making tea WITH HIS VIOLIN PLAYING YYYAAAASSSS!!!!!!!!!

omg there’s a shadow...

AN A CREAK

I KNEW IT WAS MOIARTY!!!!!!

sherlock lets him sit down wowza kind to a criminal! :o

moiarty: “every fairytale needs a good old-fashioned villain ;)” omg HE KNOWS HE’S A STORY CHARACTER AHHHH :o

moiarty to sherlock: “you need me.” no he needs john THANK YOU VERY MUCH

moiarty thinks sherlock’s boring SHUT UP FUNNY MEAN MAN >:(

moiarty: “that’s the problem... the final problem.” eyyyy roll s4 credits! :D

moiarty: “i didn’t tell you... but did you listeeeennnn?” lol sing-songy moiarty is funny :D

he’s doing the hand thing ♥

moiarty: “i own secrecy” who do you think you are bish brother

MOIARTY CALLED SHERLOCK ‘HONEY’ :o

WHY IS MOIARTY SAYING ‘DADDY’

THE FALL HE SAID THE FALLLLLLLL

sherlock: “i never liked riddles.” *maddie hatter rages in the distance*

he’s having a row with the machine again ;)

also that’s literally my dad with his card lol :D

ooh antiques roadshow! :D

john’s meeting mycroft why

OMG HE WAS TAKEN HOSTAGE

it’s just mycroft’s way of saying hello?

what happened in 1972

mycroft’s giving john an unrelated case... s1 finale flashback!

john’s loooong groan lol :D

sherlock is moiarty’s ‘only rival’... >:)

awww john fed some crumbs to birds :)

another unrelated case and lestrade is at the flat! :o

lestrade called lockie ‘a celebrity’ awww :)

SHERLOCK DON’T YELL AT THE CRYING LADY :(

oh he wanted her to ‘speak quickly’ ok

not ok but thaaat’s lockie!

it be moi...

sherlock SNIFF

sherlock: “brilliant, anderson?” anderson: “really?” sherlock: “brilliant impression of an idiot.” OHHHHH!!!!!!! :D

sherlock 2 NOW

john: “don’t do the smiling thing. kidnapped children..?” oh he always does the smiling thing! ;)

molly was going on a lunch date but sherlock said she’ll go with him and her little ‘what?’ is so cute! :D

sherlock’s like ‘look at all the fricks i give’ :D

aaand he left her!

sherlock: “the chemical footprints will lead us to moiarty!” all roads lead to rome, and all the footprints there lead to moiarty ;)

SHERLOCK CALLED MOLLY ‘JOHN’ OMG :D

b r i c k   d u s t

molly: “you’re like my dad. he’s dead- no, sorry-” lol :D

oh no molly’s telling a sad dad story :(

i can kind of see why people ship sherlock and molly they’re nice together :)

BUT JOHNLOCK IS BEST SHIP

although molly’s super awkward she’s so cute! :D

SHERLOCK GOT THE FAIRYTALE REFERENCE AFTER I DID YAS!!!!! :D

lestrade: “brick dust!” b r i c k  d u s t

he’s the google in 360 website! :D

they burst through the kidnapper’s door and it was like ‘someBODY once told me’! :D

omg mercury chocolate wrappers! :o

sherlock: “the more they ate, the faster they died... neat!” ...neat? :o

they found the kidnapped kids! :D

lestrade doesn’t want lockie to be himself awww :(

THE KIDNAPPED GIRL SCREAMED AT SHERLOCK NO :(

lestrade to sherlock: “i feel like screaming when you walk in!” ooh noice ;)

the jerk lady said sherlock was ‘unbelievable’ coolio she’s a bit nice! :D

MOIARTY HACKED THE TAXI TV OMG :o

also there are tvs in taxis OMG :o

lestrade called sherlock and john ‘csi baker street’ lol :D

moiarty’s connecting sherlock to sir bostalot hmm... ;)

hmmm....

sherlock: “what was that on the tv?” cabbie: “no charge...” *drives away* OHHHH

OMG SHERLOCK ALMOST GOT HIT BY A DAR

OMFG WAS HE ALMOST SHOT WTF WAS THAT

john to the rescue!!! :D

the guy was shot not lockie coolio

sherlock uses a mac WHYYY :(

sherlock: “dust is eloquent” mrs. hudson in a whisper: “what’s he on about???” lol :D

lockie vlogs! :D

sherlock: “this is a game, lestrade, one i’m not willing to play.” so the game is not on, then?

john: “i know you for real.” sherlock: “100%” awww :)

john: “no one could fake being suck an annoying dick all the time.” OHHHH!!!!! :D

guy: “yer a bloody idiot, lestrade!” and yer a bloody brit aren’t ya?

mrs. hudson said ‘ooh hoo’ just like oaken! :D

OMG fairytale!!!!

lestrade and the lady knocked on the door and mrs. hudson’s like ‘don’t barge in like that!’ :D

OMG THEY’RE ARRESTING LOCKIE

WHY IS THE LADY THINKING LOCKIE DID IT HE DIDN’T!!!!!

awww sherlock and john were arrested together so romantic just girly things ♥

OMG GUN SHOT????

they’re running omg!!!!!

sherlock: “take my hand!” FRICK YES

john: “people will definitely talk!” FRICK YAAAAS!!!!!!!

just two bfs running around in handcuffs ♥

they need to coordinate while getting up the stairs... easy enough for them! ;)

THEY JUMPED IN FRONT OF A VAN JUST CRIMEY THINGS ♥

i thought the van thing was part of the drunk ep in s3 but it’s cool that-

GUN SHOTS????

they let go! :o

OMG IT’S THE CREEPY FAN!!!!

moiarty: “they didn’t have any ground coffee so i just got-” *SUSPENSE CHORD* out of context that’s hilarious :D

moiarty’s richard!!! :o

wait he’s a hired actor the frick???

THE FRICK ARE THEY ACTING??????

just because it’s in print doesn’t mean it’s real...

ok technically moiarty’s an actor BUT THAT BE KNOCKING DOWN THE 4TH WALL

an actor playing a person playing an actor... wild actorception! :o

moiarty: “i’m the storyteller! it’s on dvd...” but is it on blu-ray? ;)

sherlock: “stop it STOP IT NOW!!!!” yoda seagulls...

fan: “i can read you and you... repel... me...” DON’T USE HIS LINE BOI

sherlock: “there’s only one way to complete his game...” is it on? ;)

OMG he’s admitting his feelings to molly AND HE NEEDS HER awwww!!!! :D

the sherlolly fans loved that i bet! :D

john to mycroft: “you and him go out for coffee? you and jim?” sarah z be like ‘YAS!’ :D

OMG WAIT DID MYCROFT WORK WITH MOIARTY????

mycroft tells john to tell moiarty ‘i’m sorry’ and john just gives this ‘please’ wheeze lol :D

julie albright bouncing her basketball against her bedroom wall in ‘meet julie’ (colorized)

oh CRAP

lockie’s fidgeting with the ball awwww :)

OMG MRS. HUDSON WAS SHOT THE FRICK????????

john: “she’s DYING.... you MACHINE!!!!!!” YEAH LOCKIE YOU BISH

john: “friends protect people!” true that!

THE FRICK WHY IS BEE GEEZ PLAYING

this is the music video lol :D

omg are moiarty and lockie gonna have a dance battle like in despicable me 3 lol :D

moiarty: “our final problem... stayin’ aliiiive!!!!!” HE SO PLANNED THAT

there’s about 28 minutes left will the battle take that long?

oh he turned the song off :/

aw man moiarty has to play with the ordinary people :/

MOIARTY SAID ‘atta boyyyy’ TO SHERLOCK WHYYYYYY

ooh sherlock’s doing binary code with his fingers! :D

moiarty: “first one to sherlock is a sissy” oh SHUT UP

moiarty: “there is no key DOOFUS!!!!” WOAH MAN CALM THE FRICK DOWN

“look at ALLLLL THE FRICKS I GIVE SHERLOCK!!!!”

moiarty: “nice you chose a tall building! great way to do it!” sherlock: “do- do- do what?” oh you know what lockie :(

moiarty: “i read it in the paper so it must be true!” no!!!!

john’s here for mrs. hudson!!!! :D

she seems fine tho?

moiarty: “for me? pleeeeeaaaseee?????” OMG THAT ‘PLEASE’ WAS SO HIGH LOLOLOL!!!!!!!

toss him sherlock TOSS HIM!!!!!

moiarty’s little ‘woah woah woah!’ tho :D

aww sherlock has only 3 friends :(

moiarty about sherlock kermiting: “you gotta admit that’s sexier” WUT

NOOOOOOOOO

sherlock’s breath is so shaky :(

he said ‘privacy’ like ‘pri-va-cee’ why

he’s gonna call john!!!!!

awww smile!!!! :D

he knows that this is fake right?

moiarty’s like ‘WHAT?? WHAT DID I MISS????” BOI CALM DOWWwwwwnnnn

sherlock to moiarty: “i am you. prepared to do anything.” save that line for john plz

sherlock is ‘on the side of the angels’ awww :)

moiarty said sherlock’s not ordinary RIGHT HE’S A SPECIAL SUNSHINE ANGEL

moiarty: “you’re meee!!!!!” NOT WHAT I MEANT

they’re holding hands and standing close NOOOOO

HOLY FRICK SHERLOCK JUS SHOT MOIARTY IN THE MOUTH THE FRICK THE FRACK???????

he’s not really dead right or is that just a theory

sherlock’s like ‘oh god what have i done’ SAME WHAT DID YOU DO

it sounds like the thx theme!

oh no

i know it’s not a legitimate kermiting sewerside but DON’T FREAKING DO IT

HE’S CALLING JOHN OH FRICK

HE WANTS JOHN TO SEE HIM FALL THE FRICKKKKK

sherlock: “look up, i’m on the rooftop.” ♫ up on the rooftop, click click click, HERE COMES SAD OL’ KERMIT CLAUS ♫

CRAP

sherlock: “i can’t come down so we’ll have to do it like this.” it was only a kiss :(

an apology????

‘IT’S ALL TRUE’ THE FRICK????

is this just for moiarty’s game?

sherlock sounds like he’s gonna cry NOOOOO :(((((

john: “shut up, shut up, shut up.” SAME WTF ARE YOU SAYING LOCKIE???

sherlock: “no one could be that clever. you could.” OMGGGGG

FIRST WINSTON & JULIA AND NOW SHERLOCK & JOHN WHYYYYY

sherlock sniffled omg :’(

he researched john to impress him OH MY HEART!!!!!

it’s not a trick sherlock is legit amazing!!!!!!!!

sherlock wants john to ‘keep his eyes fixed’ NOOOOOOOO

if sherlock knows this is fake he’s doing a pretty good job at it BUT WHY JUST TO PLEASE MOIARTY OR ESCAPE THE SPOTLIGHT OR WHAT

sherlock: “goodbye john.” NO

NO

NO

OH GOD THERE WAS A CRACK

if sherlock’s alive THEM HOW WAS THERE A CRACK

WAIT JOHN JUST FELL THE FRICK IS GOING ON????

john: “i’m a doctor, he’s my friend!” yes you are AND YES YOU FREAKING ARE

it’s fake he’s not really dead OH HOW I WISH I COULD TELL YOU THAT JOHNNY :(

OMG NO :’(

THE SAD VIOLIN I CAN’T

everything is slow NOOOOO

i can’t believe mofftiss made the fans wait 2 YEARS TO FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENED NEXT i know there was ‘many happy returns’ in 2013 BUT HOW DID THE FANS SURVIVE THAT LONG WITH THAT ENDING????

it’s raining now perfect

gun????

therapist: “he didn’t say it. say it now.” john: “sorry, i can’t.” he said ‘i love you’ :(

awww john and mrs. hudson! :’(

omg she’s crying no!!!! :(

john to sherlock’s grave: “you were the best man and the most human i’ve ever known.” awww :’)

john: “one more miracle for me, sherlock. don’t. be. dead.” miricale granted my friend ;)

OMG WHAT HE WAS STANDING THERE THE WHOLE TIME WITH JOHN SUFFERING LIKE THAT THE FRICK?????

that’s the end of s2! that was a much better finale than s1 and it’s definitely the best ep of the series so far. there’s a lot of exciting turns AND WHAT EVEN IS THE ENDING??? you knocked it out of the park mofftiss! i can’t wait to see what s3 has in store besides mary, drunk times and the wedding!

and to quote the blog... ‘#sherlocklives #johnwatsonlives’ ♥