#(himself. and how much he hates himself) | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

thebrainrotsreal · 4 months ago

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Eve, Kate, Mark and Rex! Nailing some ideas down on how I wanna draw them in the future, and enjoying messing with their designs like usual! Not a fix-it whatsoever just fun + ref for the future! I cannot do realistic styles so translating them into something I can do while still being recognizable is peak. I will mess with Rex's suit more. Trust. I Kate so much now. Look at her <333333

#the brainrotsreal's art tag ✧˖°:*♡#invincible fanart #invincible #mark grayson #digital art #fanart #procreate art #rex splode #duplikate #atom eve #eve wilkins #RAMBLE TIMEEEEEEEEEEEE #MARK: again he's got his mother's pearl earrings as a winky wink to batman reference + fun inkling that he is ALSO his mom's son #MARK: adding to the whole difference of civvie/hero persona he's a bit more miserable looking and anxious w/o the suit while emotional in i #but also means he's eager and confident when he does think he knows what he's doing. but is not as confident outside of it.#heroism is his chance to prove his worth in his eyes even after Dad Realization because know he has to prove he ISNT his Dad.#Basically Invincible will always need to prove himself but he doesn't know how to do that as Mark Grayson. so gold = joy/confidence #stays on Invincible. but not mark #REX: easy peezy a spiky hair style to wink more at his passionate and louder personality as well as wink to the explosion thing #REX: gold earrings and shoulders exposed as civvie because i know in my soul he WOULD. like i cant even explain he told me himself.#goggle change to lean more into the style change! pupil-less design!! and gold eyes cause he got experimented on/powers ingrained.#the dangling bit from the goggles screams fighter and since he does ALSO need to fight it makes sense #KATE: new haircut cause i cant stand her normal one istg. ugh. but keeping the same vibe! leaning more into ben 10 type of elements since #numbers ARE a point of her design AND power so it was only fitting! i love her suit so much #NOWWWWW since she is A REAL FIGHTER like her only thing is multiplying still mean she knows how to throw a punch and MOVE i figure #she works out a ton and has a more flexible sporty fit going on so she's got a hoodie crop top. ready to jog at all times.#once in my brain she's the vague sorta raven of the group (more isolated and withdrawn since she doesn't rlly interact with anyone)#added black made SENSEEEEE #EVEEE: easiest to do because she is starfire of the group so i got possessed! honestly kept all her colors except tried to move around the #logo a bit more and take slight inspo from Justice league Green lantern's design + tweak the logo cause i realized i hate it KSDKS

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watchingwisteria · 2 years ago

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listen there really was just something about how in the book, snow’s 3-page descent from hesitant lover boy to deluded mfer happens entirely in his mind. lucy gray gives him no indication whatsoever that she suspects him, that she’s going to leave or betray him. he’s just sitting quietly in the cabin waiting for her to return when that seed of calculated suspicion, which he has needed to survive the capitol, takes a hold of him and chokes the life out of any goodness left inside him. it really drives home your terror as a reader that “oh my god did he kill her? did she escape? what happened to her? why would he even think that?” in a way that when the movie had to adjust for visualization it lost some of that holy shit this guy has lost it emphasis.

#seeing some discourse and im not saying lucy grey didnt know #im saying she never dropped the kind of hints that she knew like she did in the movie #or if she did snow isnt worried about them until he very suddenly is consumed by them #snow is not concerned about whether or not she believed him. of course she did! hes snow!#but then shes gone…. for a while……#and its the sudden immediate drastic unravelling that comes across so clearly in the book #that i knew wouldn’t translate to screen yet still cant help but miss #the hunger games #coriolanus snow #tbosas #lucy gray baird #not a crime or anything just a note that i cannot stop thinking about #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #this is all from memory of reading it quite a while ago. so maybe 3 pages is an exaggeration #but i remember it happening VERY quickly and without much external cause #like we as the reader have no indication as to whether shes nearby or not.#snow has no idea either. he just SUSPECTS. and his suspicion breeds the hatred that has been bubbling inside him all this time #he hates how she undoes him. he hates that he WOULD run away with her if shed let him keep his secrets #and he HATES more than anything that she makes him WANT to tell his secrets #he wants to be vulnerable and reveal the ugly nasty parts about himself and still be loved #but he does not let himself and it is everyone’s downfall #he chooses cruelty bc it is easy and familiar and makes him feel more powerful than the vulnerable give and take that real love requires

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seaemberthesecond · 2 months ago

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Screaming crying throwing up thinking about how all the beautiful and strange and fantastical animals Ronan dreams up flock to Declan, Disney Princess style. How the floating lights in trk want to go home with Declan. How Ronan dreamt up Chainsaw, the truest and most tender part of his soul, after the Nino's fight in trc. Thinking about how much Matthew loves Declan despite being created to be his replacement, to be Ronan's better-loved and better-loving brother.

Thinking about how even after all the years, all the time and effort and energy Ronan put into hating Declan, he is betrayed by his own creations. No matter what he does, his dreams can't help but love Declan, because Ronan can't help but love his brother.

#he can lie to himself! he can lie to his friends and his brothers! he can lie to declans face!#but he cant lie to his dreams!#and honestly? embarrassing.#imagine u spend all ur time talking abt how much you hate ur older brother #only for the little bits of your soul youve bottled in the shape of dream cows and a cat with hands #to try to crawl into your brothers bed every morning #trc #tdt #the raven cycle #the dreamer trilogy #declan lynch #ronan lynch #my posts

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namesniche · 4 months ago

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Everytime Vanilla tries to help him.. he always rejects it. I wonder why..

#It's because he hates himself #atleast with how i write them lmao i think shadow milk sees himself too much in vanilla #so the agony of his betrayal and seeing vanilla still forgive him is too much #how can vanilla forgive him when he cant even forgive himself? crazy #so when he says i hate you #vanilla knows he means he hates himself by proxy #niche's artwork #cookie run kingdom #crk #crk fanart #pure vanilla cookie #shadow milk cookie #shadowvanilla #puremilk

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cosmicraelum · 2 months ago

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| Jambound 26 |

The Room Is Warm

#jambound #crk #cookie run kingdom #shadow milk cookie #shadow milk fanart #pure vanilla cookie #pure vanilla fanart #pureshadow #shadowvanilla #these two make me sick I hate them so much #shadow milk rly said 🥺#I think I’ve finally gotten the hang of drawing pure vanilla too which thank god my boy only deserves the best #slowly but surely getting happy with how I draw smilk too #I typically draw him with hair covering his eye but whenever he’s conveying himself more genuinely is where I’d want to draw both eyes #don’t mind me I’m just rambling now

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emilyjunk · 10 months ago

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"Kevin isn't that bad it's not like he beats her, why does she need to kill him or fake her death, just get divorced" you are the point of the show, you are missing the crucial reveal. Allison sees Kevin in every single scene as she does their last scene together, but we as the audience aren't privy to that and we only see sitcom Kevin which is Kevin's self perception. He is not suddenly becoming scary and threatening to her. He was like that the whole time. We only see Allison's feelings about Kevin and the aftermath of her interactions with Kevin -- this is the ONLY time we see Kevin from her POV except for the brief initial breaking of the sitcom cam. Every other time we see Kevin on screen it's from Kevin's POV. Even after she cuts her hand we only see the bandage in her singular pov when she is away from kevin, but when it shifts back to sitcom Kevin it's gone.... We do not see the reality of her interactions with Kevin, that's the point of the show!!! Because when Kevin is on screen, it's Kevin's world! We only see Kevin from anyone else's lens in ONE scene at the end, which is when Allison decides to leave, so yes the sitcom cam "softens his abuse" but it also just fully acts as an unreliable narration because we never literally see Kevin from anyone else's POV until the series finale so every time Kevin is on screen it isn't even an accurate portrayal of what's happening, it's Kevin's perception of what's happening. Allison has viewed him like that the entire show, we as the audience just did not get to witness that POV until the end

#personal #this is exactly how it feels to have someone like that in your life!#everyone is like 'hes not that bad' bc they are in the sitcom cam!!!! you dont see it from the other pov #i like. didn't relate much until the sitcom cam dropped and then suddenly it was like being slapped in the face #bc that is how Allison ALWAYS sees kevin...... we just didn't get to witness it until then. and then that felt extremely relatable #screeching....#ik im years late bc i only now just watched but honestly???? masterpiece of television holy shit #kevin can fuck himself #kevin can f**k himself #Allison is not just 'trapped in a marriage she hates' we are just not privy to her terror bc we dont see kevin from her pov at all #we only see kevin from kevins pov #we see her talking about kevin a lot but we dont actually get to see how trapped and scared she feels until that last moment #hhhh

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crispywizardtale · 13 days ago

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#Alan loves Jeff so much... he loves him more than he loves himself and there is just something beautifully heartbreaking in it #i hate how small Jeff looks in this scene. i hate how terrified he is and how how eyes show it so strongly #i hate how helpless Alan must feel watching the love of his life struggle like this knowing that he cannot help him in any way #i just want them to be happy... i need it more than i need air #please let them be happy #pit babe the series #pit babe 2 #pit babe the series 2 #pit babe season 2 #pit babe #alan x jeff #alanjeff #sailub hemmawich #pon thanapon #sailubpon #mine 2025 #Pon did just a great job i almost cried during this performance

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clotpolesonly · 1 month ago

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what'd'ya think are the odds that Declan was actually the #1 suspect in Niall's murder, full investigation and interrogations and everything, and Ronan just. missed that memo

#a cop tried to talk to him about it and Ronan went on a whole screed about how much Declan hated their dad #and the cop went Hmm. and made a note on his little pad #then the lawyer showed up to remind them they couldn't talk to a minor without his legal guardian present #and Ronan immediately went back to day drinking and trying to kill himself #he has no memory of this conversation #Declan Lynch #Ronan Lynch #TRC #tags by me

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dykedvonte · 8 months ago

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Curly's little blurb on his steam trading card just keeps reminding me he is a much more miserable person than people realize.

We don't get a lot of his thoughts, inner confliction that aren't bogged down by what Jimmy says or does. Even in the The Last One and Then Another, his dialogue is reflective, not the Curly before the crash but the result of everything. Parts of the him he was are there of course, but also disfigured and warped beyond recognition just like he is physically.

Curly really doesn't think much of himself and desires. He clearly chases fleeting moments of happiness. He doesn't really have prospects for himself, assumes in a similar way to Swansea, that if it should make it happy then he is happy. Though, he hasn't reached the point Swansea did to admit it doesn't. He neither sees the glass half full or empty, it's just water, something he needs and he'll take it from any perspective.

He wasn't running from anything but he's never really been going towards something either. He's listless. I've been using the term complacent to describe how he feels about his life and the closest people (really just Jimmy) in it, but now that word feels too neutral, too nice. Happier than Curly really was. There isn't just one word for it, he's unfulfilled, uncertain, uninspired. There are no active problems he faces and that's the issue, why should he be upset?

I believe he really is a person who doesn't know who he is or wants to be. He follows a structure. I don't think he's suicidal, but he clearly doesn't think about what makes him happy. He's numb. I suppose that is a better word than complacent, used to the feeling even if he hates it. It doesn't hurt so why stop it?

#like curly is very much does his job goes home takes care of self repeat i dont think hes like an asocial person but he doesn't take the tim #time to indulge in himself the way he thinks hes a bigger picture guy so as long as nothing is disrupted hes relatively okay even if its #slowly chipping away at him and making him feel hollow like he thought space was endless that he could never reach a point of feeling finis #he never had to predict what to do after the end and suddently he realizes there was no end to it because there cant be an end to nothing #hes accomplished so much objectively but hes done nothing with his life outside of his work like he mentions no hobbies other friends or an #thing of the sort he doesn't even feel like he can vent it cause what? hes complaining about how hard it is to get promoted to have securit #in a job you hate and a position that keeps weighing you down like I feel like if he explained himself at the party and didn't let Jimmy t #talk for him hed actually have made points the others would get cause even if they envied his position he still is justified in being unhap #not everything that you think would bring you happiness does or fulfills even a small part of that desire #idk hes a lot more fucked in the head but like towards himself than people realize like how he lets Jimmy treat him is indicitive of that i #mouthwashing #mouthwashing game #captain curly #curly mouthwashing

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anticidic · 2 months ago

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I'll never be normal about the fact over the course of Stormbringer those around Chuuya, himself included, had their doubts as to whether Chuuya was human or not, but Dazai was the one who was so sure that Chuuya was human from the start.

Dazai, who struggles with his own humanity and struggled with finding things to live for, believed in Chuuya's humanity at sixteen

And the fact that Dazai gave Chuuya as much time as they could allow for Chuuya to process whether or not he was a human, and even walked away so Chuuya could be alone since it was such a sensitive thing for him

Dazai “An artificial string of equations couldn’t create that humanity I despise so much.” Osamu

That's a funny way of saying Chuuya invokes feelings in you, Dazai, whatever your feelings are

hrhgrhgh so, so normal

#bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #bsd #bsd dazai #bsd chuuya #soukoku #stormbringer #bsd stormbringer #thoughts #dazai with the mental gymnastics #with how much he goes on about how he hates chuuya atp he's doing it to convince himself and everyone's just nodding politely #ur emotionally constipated dazai

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stemiwithme · 3 months ago

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langdon and santos are both right about each other. langdon is right when he calls santos out for her mean streak while speaking to robby and santos is right when she brings her own concerns abt langdon’s suspected drug abuse to robby. like they’re both 100% right and valid in those moments. and i think it gives them this rly interesting dynamic where they’re just…transparent to each other. not WITH but to. as in they see right through the other’s mask even when other people don’t. and they mirror each other like crazy!!! they’re both extremely ambitious, cocky, restless, full of false bravado. but they’re also kind and gentle and sensitive and funny. they’re so alike but they also HATE each other and it is SO fun and entertaining while also speaking to a deeper level of their characters. something something self hatred subconsciously projected outward something something. idk i just think they’re neat and it’d be cool to see an enemies to coworkers who can actually tolerate being in the same room together arc. i need santos to be mean to him and for him to laugh and say something stupid and it’s all good bc the beef has been squashed and santos just shakes her head and walks away

#the pitt #trinity santos #frank langdon #not to project too much here but i could see langdon even being grateful for her eventually for ratting him out #like after he gets clean and he has time to reflect and process everything #who knows how much longer it would’ve gone on/how much worse it would’ve become had she not exposed it when she did #i think frank is the kind of person to recognize that and give credit where it’s due #maybe that could be the thing that solidifies them as kinda friends #not that it would be comfortable or easy i think he’d hate having to put himself in that position #but i think he’s rational enough and will hopefully become humble enough to do it <3 #ramblings

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random-lil-illing · 10 months ago

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i had a vision,,, asexual dps fans what do we think

#dps #dead poets #dead poets society #dead poets fandom #dps headcanons #dead poets headcanons #dead poets society headcanons #steven meeks #stephen meeks #gerard pitts #richard cameron #asexual #asexuality #dps meeks #dps pitts #dps cameron #to be fair i headcanon todd as also being on the asexual spectrum but more like. demisexuality so he doesnz really fit on this spectrum #meeks would say the most horrendous #diabolical heinous shit EVER. worse than charlie even. that girl knows her stuff and she uses it to her advantage #when it actually comes to doing that shes like “HELL NO” she just likes to joke #pitts is so used to it from meeks he does NOT care #but he himself doesnt really joke abt it. hes pretty much indifferent #and cameron #poor cameron hates it due to their upbringing and other factors in general #cam cannot fathom how meeks does it #anyway #enjoy the burnt food #<3

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utilitycaster · 8 months ago

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I think the two most obvious foils for Ludinus Da'leth across all of Critical Role are Essek and Keyleth, which is both fascinating given how different those two characters are from each other (Essek being a foil in terms of isolation, single-mindedness, harm in the name of ambition, knowledge, and other such wizard themes; Keyleth being a foil in terms of people who have lost something at a young age to the gods and bear resentment for it, political leadership, belief that the world belongs to mortalkind, and longevity) but also it's extremely funny that they both are the partners of Liam's character.