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secretliz001 · 5 years ago

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翻译：Yesterday, Today and Paul

原链接：https://www.the-paulmccartney-project.com/interview/yesterday-today-and-paul/

WELL, IT SURE SOUNDS like rock & roll, even if it is Wings. Little Jimmy McCulloch, former Thunderclap Newman, and Denny Laine, former Moody Blue, are burners on guitars. Joe English, former nobody, is ecstatic on blistering drums. Linda McCartney, former photographer, punches away at a stockpile of keyboards and accounts for all the sound effects we’ve grown to love on all the Wings albums. And Paul McCartney, former Beatle, drives the whole band, plus a four-piece horn section adding funk and frills. He cruises on bass while Laine and McCulloch provide the power; on piano, he hammers out “Lady Madonna” and “Live and Let Die”; back on bass, he screams, reaching back for some of that Little Richard inspiration, through “Beware My Love” and “Letting Go.” And after a particularly meaty, beaty number, there is a shout from Laine or McCartney of “rock & roll!”

Well,就算对Wings乐队来说，这场景也很肉啃肉。小只的Jimmy McCulloch曾属于Thunderclap Newman，Denny Laine曾属于Moody Blue，都是吉他手；Joe English先前不属于任何乐队，在激烈鼓声前挥汗如雨；Linda McCartney，前任摄影师，在一堆键盘上大展拳脚，并在Wings的所有专辑中加入了我们所喜爱的音效。以及前任披头Paul McCartney带领着整支乐队，加上一个四人铜管组合，为乐队的funk与多样性锦上添花。有了Laine和McCulloch的助力，他在贝司上游走，在钢琴上敲出了“Lady Madonna” 和“Live and Let Die”，再回到贝司，带着Little Richard标志性的嚎叫唱出“Beware My Love” 和“Letting Go”。唱完一曲尤其内容有料节奏抓耳的歌后，不知是Laine 还是McCartney吼了一句“rock & roll!”

And Wings gets all the rock & roll responses: people in the audience suddenly sticking their arms up in clenched-fist salutes, piercing the air with two-fingered whistling, whooping in celebration of each of the five Beatles songs offered, unleashing ferocious, match-lit, Bic-flicked encore calls. It is the first American tour by Paul McCartney since 1966, when he was still a you-know-what. Along with John, George and Ringo, he was supposed to have detested the audiences, scream storms of wet panties that rushed them everywhere from Shea Stadium in New York to Candlestick Park in San Francisco. Now, with the Apple rot, Beatles split, lawsuits and bad-mouthings pretty much behind them, Paul finds himself invoking the old days, inviting people to clap hands and stomp feet, waving and posing to audiences behind and to the sides of the stage.

Wings也得到了十分摇滚的回应：观众突然举起双臂握紧拳头致意，；两个手指吹出的口哨刺破了空气，依次为出场的五首披头士曲目欢呼，为了最后的encore举起打火机以火作灯疯狂尖叫。这是Paul McCartney在美国开的第一次巡演，上一次还是1966年，当他还是个“你懂的”的人物的时候。与John, George 和Ringo一样，他本应痛恨着观众，狂热女粉们带着尖叫驱赶着他们从纽约Shea体育馆到旧金山Candlestick公园。而现在，Apple已倒，披头士解散，官司和恶语相向差不多过去，Paul发现自己又唤起往日的时光，邀请人们拍手跺脚，向着四面八方的观众挥手致意。

【我猜wet panties是狂热女粉的意思吧?】

But here in America in 1976, few try rushing the stage; first-aid setups go untested; security guards wind up turning down their walkie-talkies so they can hear the show. The only Beatlemaniacal screaming is at the beginning, when Paul first appears out of the darkness. The one song that gets screeches – an absolute demonstration, in fact – is the quietest Beatle song of all . . .

但在1976年的美国，几乎无人尝试冲上舞台；急救装置不用测试；保安人员为了能听到演出，把对讲机音量调低。唯一的披头马尼亚尖叫声是当Paul在一首歌的开头走进灯光时。这首收获标准披头马尼亚尖叫的歌反而是是最安静的一首披头士作品......

Saturday, May 8th: on the main floor of the seedy Olympia Stadium in Detroit, Michigan, one young man keeps shouting for the people in front of him to sit down. We were into the acoustic set, with Laine, McCulloch and the McCartneys on rattan chairs, all but Linda playing guitars. After a few numbers, it is Paul alone onstage, tuning up for “Blackbird.” The man in the audience-he apparently saw the first show here the night before – seems to know what’s coming.

5月8日，星期六：在密歇根州底特律市奥林匹亚体育场的主楼，一个年轻人不停地喊着让前面的人坐下。演出进入了原声吉他主场，Laine, McCulloch 和McCartney夫妇坐在藤椅上，除了琳达其他人都在弹吉他。几首曲子过后，只剩Paul一人在台上为“Blackbird”调音。这个观众他显然在前一天晚上看过首演，他似乎知道会发生什么。

“Siddown!” he shrieks. “Siddown, you fuckers!” Then he turns to a friend and explains his urgency. The voice level is down to conversational and he sounds rational.

“你给我坐下！”他叫着，“坐下，你个傻逼！” 然后他转身向朋友解释他着急的原因。他降到了普通对话的音量，听起来很理性。

“I wanna see ‘Yesterday,’ ” he says.

“我想看‘Yesterday‘，”他说。

If you want the Beatles, go see Wings.

–George Harrison, November 1974

如果你想看披头士乐队，去看Wings演出吧。

- George Harrison, 1974年11月

Paul McCartney doesn’t mind a look back at Yesterday, but today he is dedicated to two goals: the acceptance by public and press of Wings as a band and not as a backup for a former Beatle, and acknowledgment from those same two difficult institutions that Wings (and Paul) are rock, not pop.

Paul McCartney不介意回唱Yesterday，但今天他专心于两个目的：希望公众和媒体接受Wings是一支正经乐队，而不是他这个前披头士伴奏乐队，以及希望他们承认Wings（和Paul）走的摇滚路线，而不是pop。

But McCartney has some difficulties.

但是他遇到了一些困难。

First, he was a Beatle; he can’t change or deny that. And he wouldn’t anyway. “I’m a Beatles fan,” he says later. “When John was saying a couple of years ago that it was all crap, it was all a dream, I know what he was talking about, but at the same time I was sitting there thinking, ‘No it wasn’t.’ It was as much a dream as anything else is; as much crap as anything else is. In fact, it was less crap than a lot of other stuff.” And he agrees with George’s equation of Wings and Beatles:

第一个难题，他是一个披头士，这一点他无法改变或者否认。虽然他本也不会。"我是披头士的粉丝，"他后来说。"当John几年前说那都是屑，都是梦的时候，我知道他什么意思，但同时我也在想，'不，不是的'。它和其他任何东西一样像是一场梦，也其他任何东西一样扯。事实上，比起其他东西，披头士可没那么垃圾。" 他也同意George把Wings和披头士划上等号的说法：

“I wouldn’t put it just like that. I’d say, ‘If you want the Wings, go see Wings; if you want Beatles, look at an old film.’ But I probably was a little more sort of Beatleminded than the rest. I tended to ring people up and say, ‘Let’s work now,’ ‘Let’s do this.’ So I suppose it’s a fair point that that was my bag anyway and I just continued doing it. Whereas George . . . ’round about Sergeant Pepper, he only did the one track on Sergeant Pepper, he didn’t turn up for a lot of the other stuff, because he really wasn’t that interested. I was still very interested.”

“但我不会这样表达。我会说，‘如果你想看Wings表演，你去看Wings，如果你想看Beatles表演，你去看老视频吧。’但我大概也比其余人更一心向披头，我是那个经常给别人打个电话说‘来干活吧’，‘咱们做这个吧’的人，而George 则是......制作Sergeant Pepper那一阵，他只有一首歌，很多别的环节他都没有参加，因为他不是那么感兴趣。但我依然十分感兴趣。“

Second difficulty: McCartney is cute. And at age 33, there are none of the signs that make for easy writing – that, say, his face is fuller . . . fleshier . . . rounded out by the years. Backstage, he introduced himself cheerfully as “David Cassidy,” and I could see why. But with few exceptions (if pressed, Peter Frampton and Suzi Quatro come to mind), cute people are not quite believable as pained, ravaged, booze-based, serious rockers.

第二个难题：McCartney看着太可爱了。33岁的人，没显示出任何让人可写被岁月磨圆的痕迹的点，除了他的脸更饱满了，肉更多了。在后台，他愉快将自己比为" David Cassidy "，理由也很明显。可除了少数例外（一定要说的话，可以算上Peter Frampton 和Suzi Quatro），这样一个可爱的人，实在是不像一个（通常意义上看着）痛苦，受折磨，酗酒，严肃的摇滚乐手。

【Wiki: David Cassidy是一名美国演员、歌��作曲家和乐队吉他手。在1970年代凭借热门影集“欢乐满人间”走红影视歌坛，促使他成为一个流行文化的青少年偶像。】

Another difficulty is that McCartney writes, sings and produces in the pop manner. Not that he wants to. “We’re trying to make it sound as hard as possible,” he says. “But sometimes you just don’t bring off in a studio what you can bring off in a live thing.”

还有个难点就是，McCartney以pop的模式写歌唱歌以及制作。这倒不是他的本意。"我们尽可能是我们的作品更‘硬’些，"他说，"但有时录音室里的表现无法呈现到现场表演。"

Also, Paul is a family man – married in 1969 to the former Linda Eastman. He doesn’t exactly flaunt her but there she is on the album covers and there she is onstage. The kids (Heather, 13 – by her first marriage – Mary, 6, and Stella, 4) are taken along on most Wings tours, and this one is set up partly around the family situation. The McCartneys, band members and closest aides are in four base cities (Dallas, New York, Chicago and Los Angeles) and commute to and from concerts (31 shows, 21 cities) by private jet. This saves on hotels, airports and general wear and tear, and it keeps the family together. But a photographer on the tour finds the daily commute limiting. “So far,” he says, “I’m shooting an architectural book, mostly buildings. They don’t exactly hang out a lot.”

另外，Paul是个有家室的人--1969年与Linda Eastman（原姓）结婚。他并不高调表现他的婚姻，不过专辑封面上有她，舞台上也有她。孩子们也几乎全程跟着Wings的巡演（Heather, 13岁 – Linda第一段婚姻所生 – Mary, 6岁, and Stella, 4岁），本次巡演也是围绕着家庭情况安排的。McCartney一家，乐队成员与最紧密的随行人员基于四个城市（达拉斯，纽约，芝加哥和洛杉矶），来回演唱会都乘专机（一共31场演出，遍布21个城市)。这样可以省一笔酒店机票和杂物钱，家人间也更紧密。虽然巡演中一位摄影师发现，每天来回飞行导致限制很大。"目前为止，"他说，"我像在拍一本建筑书一样，大部分照片是建筑。他们并不经常出去玩。"

And, finally, nothing – no new band he can concoct – can compare with the Beatles. This he knows well and, as he patiently counseled a young reporter from NBC-TV: “It may not be the Sixties, but nothing’s the Sixties anymore except the history books. It’s the Seventies and it’s hip and it’s happening. And it’s just . . . enjoy it.”

最后么，没什么能和披头士乐队相提并论，Paul自己组建的新乐队也不能。这一点他心里很清楚，他耐心劝告NBC电视台的一位年轻记者时说：“现在已经不是六十年代了，六十年代早就在历史书里了。"现在是七十年代，它很时髦，它是当下。享受就好。"

McCartney and his wife and band have weathered six years of criticism and misunderstanding. They are consoled only by the record buyers and have sold millions of records like “Hi Hi Hi,” “My Love,” “Helen Wheels,” “Jet,” “Band on the Run,” “Junior’s Farm,” “Listen to What the Man Said” and “Letting Go.” Not to mention seven albums, five under the name Wings.

McCartney与他的妻子以及乐队经历了六年的批评和误解。只有唱片卖家们和“Hi Hi Hi,” “My Love,” “Helen Wheels,” “Jet,” “Band on the Run,” “Junior’s Farm,” “Listen to What the Man Said” 和“Letting Go”的百万销量才在安慰他们。更不用说七张专辑里五张是Wings的。

But commercial success – the greatest, most consistent success of any of the former Beatles – is not enough. Paul says he ignores criticism – for every putdown, he says, there’s someone else who loves his stuff. He relishes reminding reporters how critic Richard Goldstein panned Sergeant Pepper. But he is thin-skinned to the point of writing “Silly Love Songs,” an answer to the dismissal of his music as pop puffery. And Linda has long been abused, written off as a particularly successful groupie in her days as a rock photographer in New York’s Village and Fillmore scenes. As a musician and a member of Wings, she has been written off as a particularly successful, etc. . . and she is, you can understand, very defensive.

但商业上的成就是不够的，即使他是四位前披头士中最成功最持续的也不够。Paul说他无视批评，认为有人贬低他的同时，也会有人喜欢他的东西。他乐得提醒记者曾经乐评人Richard Goldstein是如何诋毁Sergeant Pepper的。但他脸皮也薄，薄到写出了“Silly Love Songs”，以回击将他的音乐斥为浮夸流行音乐的评价。而Linda长期以来一直被diss，他在纽约Village and Fillmore scenes作为摇滚摄影师的时期在别人笔下被写成了一个尤其成功的groupie。作为音乐人和Wings的成员，她则被写成一个特别成功的，等等......所以可以理解，她是非常��备的。

AT THE SOUND CHECK BEFORE THE first of the two concerts in Detroit, Linda is showing me around her keyboards, instruments she learned to play after marrying McCartney. Atop the electric piano are an ARP synthesizer and a Mini-Moog, which she plays for the opening of “Venus and Mars.” Buttons are labeled “controllers,” “oscillator bank,” “mixer,” “decay time” and “modifiers for attack time.” And if that’s not confusing enough, here, facing the audience, is the Mellotron, which is loaded with tape loops that are activated by depressing keys. There are tapes of Paul singing a line – “Till you go down” – and of a laughing hyena, a pig and a bull. Here, too, is the chorale behind McCulloch’s number, “Medicine Jar,” and the robot/chain saw/moog/drum sound that opens “Silly Love Songs.” And the sounds of frying bacon and chips that appeared on Linda’s “Cook of the House,” her first solo vocal outing on the most recent album, Wings at the Speed of Sound. I mention the criticism that has already built over her celebration of her place in the kitchen. She swivels on her electric piano bench. “My answer,” she says, “is always ‘Fuck off!’ ” She continues, in a weird hybrid of accents from England, New York and finishing school. “Look, we had a great loon in the studios that night. All the hung up people don’t have to buy it, don’t have to listen to it. It’s like having parents on your back, this criticizing. I’ve grown up. I had a great night last night, this is a great band and this is great fun. And that’s all we care about.”

底特律首演前的试音中，Linda向我展示她的键盘，这是她和McCartney结婚后学会的乐器。在电子琴上有一台ARP合成器和一台Mini-Moog，是她在“Venus and Mars”开场时弹的。按钮上标有“controllers,” “oscillator bank,” “mixer,” “decay time” and “modifiers for attack time."【好多术语233】。如果这还不够让人迷糊，面对观众的还有Mellotron，装满了循环磁带，按下键就能开动。里面是Paul唱的预录音频--“Till you go down”，鬣狗、猪和牛的笑声。里头也有McCulloch的“Medicine Jar”伴唱，以及 “Silly Love Songs”开头的机器人/句子/moog音效/鼓声。还有Linda写的“Cook of the House”中出现的煎培根和薯条的声音，这是她在最新专辑Wings at the Speed of Sound中的第一次solo。我提起，人们批评她这首拥护自己在厨房角色的歌，她坐在电子琴凳上打转，回答说，"我总是回' Fuck off!'。“她继续说着，用着一口奇怪的英式、纽约和受过淑女��育的混合口音，"听着，那天晚上我们在录音室有点疯。那些介意的人可以不买，不听。这种批评就像是父母在背后叨叨，但我已经成人了。昨晚我非常开心，乐队也很棒带来乐趣也很多。这些才是我们关心的。"

【A finishing school is a school for young women that focuses on teaching social graces and upper-class cultural rites as a preparation for entry into society.】

Offstage, heading toward the dressing room, Linda asks that I forget her outburst. But a few minutes later, in conversation with Denny Laine, her hostility wells up again. We are talking about “Silly Love Songs” as a reaction to criticism. “You respond to it,” she says, “but I’d rather have life without it. I had life without it before and found it quite nice. You have criticism in school. When you get out of school, you want to be free.”

下台往更衣室去时，Linda请我无视她的“暴言“。但几分钟后与Denny Laine谈话室，她的刺又冒了出来。我们正在谈论“Silly Love Songs”这首用来回应批评的作品。"回应确实时应该有的，"她说，"但我宁愿过没有批评的生活。这生活我曾经拥有过也很喜欢。在学校里会受到批评。走出学校自然就想着自由了。"

Laine adds: “We’re pretty good critics of ourselves. We don’t need all these bums coming along and telling us, “Hey, man . . .’ “

Laine补充说，“我们本身就挺会反思的，并不需要有的没的人跑过来说‘嘿伙计blahblahblah’。”

I venture to say that theirs sounds like an insular process, with no room for sounding boards and outside opinions.

我大着胆子说，他们的流程听起来比较孤立，没有留下听取外部意见的空间。

“We always know what’s wrong,” says Linda. “We know with every album what’s gone wrong.” During recording sessions, Denny adds, there are friends who drop by and offer thoughts. “So we know pretty well where we stand.”

“我们一直知道哪里有问题，每张专辑里有些什么问题，“Linda说。Denny补充，在录音过程中也有朋友顺便提出想法，"所以我们很清楚自己的情况"。

“We know we’ve got a lot more to do,” Linda says, and turns away to talk with Paul, who’s just returned from the sound check.

“我们也知道自己还有更多可以做的，“Linda说着，转身和Paul去说话，他刚刚从试音现场回来。

Laine speaks with us for a minute more about Wings and the remains of Beatlemania. “The main thing about us,” he says, “is we want to be able to work on the stage without too much adoration, if you know what I mean. We’d rather work for it.” A lot of the audience, he says, still respond out of reverence for a Beatle. “They’re in awe, you know, of Paul. And that’s a bit of a drag.”

Laine和我们聊了一分钟关于Wings和Beatlemania的残存痕迹。"比较重要的是，"他说，"我们希望在台上演出的当下，不会收到过分的崇拜，you know。这种崇拜我们希望自己争取。" 他说，很多观众的反应还是出于对披头士的敬畏。"他们带着些敬畏之心，对Paul的敬畏。而这有点拖后腿。"

SUNDAY, MAY 9TH: PAUL McCARTNEY has just flown into Toronto from New York and sped, in one of the customary five limousines, into the backstage area of the Maple Leaf Gardens. It is 6:20; the show has a scheduled 8 p.m. starting time and he’s been booked into a gold-record presentation with Capitol Records/EMI of Canada, interviews with CBC-TV, two radio stations, one Toronto paper, and ROLLING STONE. And he should have dinner. He is running late. But a rushed sound check in Detroit spoiled the first concert there, and he isn’t about to let it happen again. He steps out of the Fleetwood, looks around, asks the closest person where the stage is and heads off. Dressed in his usual offstage clothing – loud Hawaiian print shirt, tails hanging out of a short leather jacket, unfaded jeans and rubber-soled shoes – he jumps from bass to keyboards to guitars to drums, pumping frantically until he loses a stick. Then he occupies himself behind the sound board to check other mikes and instruments. He works meticulously and by the time he’s finished, it’s 7:20. Capitol and all the interviewers have been waiting since five, but Paul seems positively casual. After a ten-minute break and a huddle with his manager (Brian Brolly, a former MCA executive who joined McCartney in 1974), he signals us into the dressing room for a double-speed interview that takes us up to the minute he has to switch to his stage outfit, a black suit with sequined shoulders. He gnaws at a fried-chicken drumstick, waving his hands expressively and freely to emphasize points.

5月9日，星期日：PAUL McCARTNEY刚从纽约飞到多伦多，乘着惯用的五辆limo之一，进到Maple Leaf Gardens后台。现在是6点20分，演出晚上8点开始，他还要在加拿大Capitol唱片/EMI的金唱片发布会上，接受CBC-TV、两家电台、一家多伦多报纸和滚石的采访。他其实应该在吃晚饭的，快迟到了。但在底特律场试音太过匆忙，首演有点搞砸，这他可不允许再次发生。他走出Fleetwood，环顾四��，问旁边的人舞台在哪儿，赶紧走了。他台下穿的日常装—明亮的夏威夷印花衬衫露在短款皮夹克外面、穿着牛仔裤和胶鞋—试音从贝斯到键盘，吉他再到鼓，他飞了一根棍子才停止敲打。然后，他就在调音台后面忙着检查其他话筒和乐器。他一丝不苟地工作着，完成时，已经7点20分了。Capitol和别的采访人员从五点开始就一直在等待，但保罗却显得相当随意。歇了10分钟，和他的经纪人（Brian Brolly，前MCA高管，1974年加入McCartney）碰头后，他示意我们进入更衣室接受两倍速的采访，直到他换上舞台装--一套肩部带亮片的黑色西装。他啃着一根炸鸡腿，表情丰富地挥着手强调重点。【草你不是75年开始吃素了吗？？fried-chicken drumstick是咋回事？】

We begin with Laine’s complaint – about the audience responding more out of awe for Paul than from appreciation of the music.

我们从Laine的抱怨开始，他抱怨观众的反应更多是出于对Paul的敬畏仰视而非对于音乐的欣赏。

“I don’t think that’s happening so much now,” he says. “I think that’s what this tour is doing. Maybe they came a bit like that – which can’t be helped – but on this tour, everyone is saying backstage afterward, ‘We came and expected one thing, but it’s very different, really.’ I think you find yourself starting to look at Denny and Jimmy and Linda and Joe and thinking, ‘Well, it’s not what I expected.’

"我觉得现在这情况已经不多了，"他说，"这就是这次巡演的目的。也许他们来的时候有点--这也没办法--但这次巡演大家在演出后台都说，‘我们来演出，（大家都盯着Paul）这是我们意料之中的，但情况其实变了。你会发现自己开始注意到Denny和Jimmy还有Linda和Joe，然后想，'好吧，这和我预想的不一样'。“

“In the Sixties, or the main Beatle time, there was screaming all the time. And I liked that then because that was that kind of time. I used to feel that that was kind of like a football match. They came just to cheer; the cheering turned into screaming when it translated into young girls. People used to say, ‘Well, isn’t that a drag, ’cause no one listens to your music.’ But some of the time it was good they didn’t because . . . you know, some of the time we were playing pretty rough there, as almost any band from that time will know.” McCartney eases into his answers, gets comfortable, stretches them out, seemingly unconscious of the rush around him.

"在六十年代，或者说是披头士的鼎盛年代永远有尖叫声。那时候我很喜欢，我曾经觉得这有点像一场足球比赛。他们来看，只是为了欢呼，而年轻女孩在欢呼的时候，就成了尖叫。人们常说，'那不是很差劲吗，都没人听你的音乐了'。但有时他们听不到也是好事，因为......有时我们表演真的很糟，几乎所有那个年代的乐队都懂的。" McCartney慢慢答道，开始放松舒展开来，仿佛没有发现周围的匆忙。

“I thought when I came out on tour again, it might be very embarrassing if they were listening instead of screaming. David Essex was talking excitedly about the British audience. ‘They’re still screaming, you know.’ Well, for him they are, and that’s his kind of audience, but when we went out, we just got up there and started playing like we were a new group. So everyone just took us like that. Sat there. ‘Yeah, that’s all right.’ And they got up and danced when we did dancing numbers. It’s perfect: you can have your cake and eat it, because they roar when you need them to roar and they listen when you’re hoping they might be listening.”

“我想，如果我再次出来巡演如果大家都在认真听歌没人尖叫反而会有些尴尬。David Essex谈起英国观众很激动，‘他们还在尖叫诶！’，对他来说尖叫当然能持续，因为观众就是来看他的。但我们开始巡演是，上台后就是一个新的团队。别人也会认为我们是新团队。他们坐着想”啊，还行啦“。然后我们表演舞曲是他们会站起来舞动。这很完美，我们尝到了甜头，因为他们在需要他们叫时叫，也会在你希望他们可能会听的时候认真听。"

McCartney opens a fresh pack of cigarettes – the brand, Senior Service – lights up and continues:

McCartney新开了一包Senior Service牌香烟点着了继续说。

“There is this feeling that I should mind if they come to see me as a Beatle. But I really don’t mind. They’re coming to see me; I don’t knock it. It doesn’t matter why they came, it’s what they think when they go home. I don’t know for sure, but I’ve got a feeling that they go away thinking, ‘Oh, well, it’s a band.’ It lets them catch up. I think the press, the media is a bit behind the times, thinking about the Beatles a lot. And I think the kids go away from the show a lot hipper than even the review they’re going to read the next day.”

“有人会觉得，如果人们过来是为了看前披头士的，我应该会介意才对。但其实我不介意，有人专程来见我，我不介意的。他们赶来的原因是什么不重要，他们看完演出，回家路上脑子里想着的咂摸的是什么才重要。虽然我不能肯定，但我感觉他们回家后会想，"好吧这确实是一个��型的乐队。"这样他们能跟上我们的节奏。我觉得媒体老是盯着披头士，这有点落后于时代了。而我觉得孩子们看完演出后会比第二天刊发的评论上写的那样还要开心。"

The press, however, seems to be catching up. On numerous next mornings, reviews have told about the reviewers’ discovery – that Wings is a rock & roll band. The New York Times attended the first show, in Fort Worth, and called it “impressively polished yet vital” and “harder-edged” than expected. Newsweek, apparently forgetting Wings’ six-year stack of golden wax, declared, “Paul McCartney had proved that he could make it on his own.”

不过媒体似乎也在追赶步伐。许多个演出隔天，评论员们都发出了”Wings确实是一个摇滚乐队“的声音。纽约时报参加了Fort Worth首演，称其为"处理到位，但又充满活力"并且“比想象中更充满锋芒”。Newsweek，显然忘记了Wings六年来的一叠金唱片，说" Paul McCartney证明了，他可以凭自己做到这一点。"

“The whole idea behind Wings,” says McCartney, “is to get a touring band. So that we are just like a band, instead of the whole Beatles myth.”

"Wings背后的整个想法，"他说，"就是要搞一个巡演乐队。这样我们是一个乐队，而不是个披头士传说。"

But no matter how much he wants to be just a member of a band, and no matter how good the band is, most of the audience is there to see one man. You can tell by the explosion of strobes and flashes from cameras around the auditorium when the moment occurs that McCartney is by himself on the stage. And by the subsequent explosion set off by people who want to capture the actual moment McCartney is singing “Yesterday.”

但无论他有多渴望自己只是乐队中的普通一员，也无论这个乐队有多棒，大部分观众都只为了看他而来。这，当McCartney独自在台上从观众席摄像机传出海量闪光灯咔擦声中，就能看出。而随后人们掀起的轰鸣，则是想要捕捉他演唱 “Yesterday”的真实瞬间。

Wings is a talented group of musicians, especially with Laine and McCulloch. But the Beatles came to be considered geniuses in the studios. I wonder whether Paul misses the other three as sounding boards. Or were Linda and Denny right in their assertion that they always knew “what’s gone wrong” with every album.

Wings确实由一群才华横溢的音乐人组成，尤其是Laine与McCulloch。但人们通常认为披头士们是录音室里的天才。我不知道保罗是否怀念以前还有其他三人互相激发想法出主意，还是说是Linda和Denny的说法是对的，他们总是知道每张专辑 "出了什么问题"。

He does miss the Beatles, he says. “I don’t know about the genius bit, but yeah, I think the Beatles was a very equal thing . . . yeah, I used to worry a little more about that, kind of saying to Linda, ‘Look, I know Denny’s good, but he’s not used to me enough. Will I dare offer him this riff; what if he turns it down?’ This standoffishness. But again, you consult your inner oracle and it tells you, well, it’s time that does all of that. You can’t take a baby and make him 14 overnight. Everyone is coming forward a bit more now. So I just thank me lucky stars that I hung in there.”

他说自己确实怀念披头士乐队。“天才不天才我不知道，但披头士内部非常平等【No, it’s not……】。以前我有点担心，会和Linda说，‘我知道Denny很棒，但是他还不够习惯与我合作。我敢不敢给他个riff让他弹啊？他会不会拒绝啊？’，这种很纠结的心态。但最终还是要从心，内心会说是时候做这些了，一口吃不成一个胖子。现在大家心态都放开些了，我就挺感激，幸运星还是在的。“

But democracy, as McCartney knows, has its price. “You’re opening the door to other possibilities, and that’s sort of what broke the Beatles up, really. The freedom for the personalities to do it. I started a group, I’ve got my wife in, took the kids on the road, just because it was all part of the way I feel.”

但是民主是有其代价的。“这扇门打开迎接了各种可能性，虽然这也是披头士解散的原因，太个性太自由了。我组了个乐队，带上老婆孩子上路，也是因为我跟着自己的feel走。

The McCartney family image does not seem to bother or affect any of the other band members, but McCartney seems sensitive about its effects on Wings’ audience and on the band’s image.

McCartney家庭的形象似乎没有困扰或影响到乐队成员，但他似乎对其对Wings的观众和乐队形象的影响很敏感。

The audience, he says, is “kind of the age group that goes to concerts – kids – and with us it stretches through to older people who were listening to the Beatles and have come right through. And I think we have a bit of a family audience because the way Linda and I live is pretty straight, in a way. So I think people maybe identify who’ve got kids and are bringing them up the same kind of way – sort of liberal, kind of ‘now’ way, rather than . . .” Paul seems momentarily embarrassed. “Sounds terrible, doesn’t it?” he asks.

他说，“观众所处的年龄段是平时会去看演唱会的孩子，青年，对于我们，年龄段会直接延伸到那些听过披头士乐队的老人们。我觉得我们有一些观众会一家一家地来，因为我和Linda的生活方式在某种程度上会很直接传达到他们。所以我想，和我们带孩子风格一样的人会认同我们这些做法，这种有些自由，专注当下��风格，而不是......" Paul似乎突然害羞了。"听起来不太好，不是吗？"他问。

Surprisingly, the audience is, as Paul notes, pretty much your rock concert crowd, more wheelchairs than baby strollers and not a picnic basket or a leisure suit in sight. And no one seems perturbed that the leader of Wings is not on the loose, the way a Robert Plant or Roger Daltrey or Mick Jagger seem to be. And even if they’re married, they don’t display their wives up onstage with them.

出乎意料的是，现场几乎都是摇滚演唱会的受众，轮椅比婴儿车还多，看不到一个野餐篮或休闲服。而且没有人因为他没有像Robert Plant，Roger Daltrey 或Mick Jagger那样豪放感到不安。甚至即使上述歌手已经结婚了，也不会和妻子一起上台表演。

“I used to think of that, when we first got together, had Linda in the group. ‘Oh, oh, we’ve had it with the groupies now! Everyone’s gonna think we’re real old squares – blimey! Married! God, at least we could have just lived together or something – that would have been a bit hip.’ Then you realize it doesn’t matter. They really come for the music. At first it did seem funny to be up there with a wife instead of just friends or people associated with the game. But I think the nice thing that’s happened is it seems to be part of a trend anyway, where women are getting in a bit more, families are a bit cooler than they were, Things change.

“我们刚在一起让Linda进乐队的时候会觉得，‘oh，我们这看着像是受够groupie了！大家都会觉得我们是老古董！天哪，结了婚的人！但是我们至少可以住在一起什么的，这挺酷。‘然后你就意识到这其实无所谓。观众是来欣赏音乐的。一开始确实挺搞笑的，是妻子在台上而不是朋友或者行内人士。但我觉得这是好事，似乎已经是一个趋势了，女人越加融入，家庭这个概念比以往更酷，风向变了。

“And the show doesn’t have anything that’s ‘family.’ I mean, I kissed Linda onstage the other night, and for me, that’s kind of, ‘Wow, I must be getting real relaxed,’ ’cause I can’t do that in public, normally. I’m a bit kinda shy.”

“表演本身并不打家庭牌。有一晚我在台上亲了Linda一下，我就觉得，‘哇我在台上一定是太放松了，因为我在一般在大庭广众下干不出这个，我还是有点害羞的。“【啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊】

It is past eight now; the show, it was decided, would start around 8:30. Capitol and local press are still waiting. Paul waves all that aside with a hand. He had told a publicist that he wanted to do this interview right.

已经八点多了，表演应该八点半开始的。Capitol和地方媒体还在等待，但是Paul挥手示意他们等一下。他对公关人员说过��把我这次采访做好。

Being a family man, he is saying now, has not affected his songwriting. McCartney, after all, was always the softer, poppier side of the Beatles. “I still think basically the same kind of things I used to; the only difference is I’ll do a tune like ‘Mary Had a Little Lamb’ [an early Wings single], but that’s the kind of thing kids request. Limitations? Maybe. The only kind I can think of is not wanting to be maybe too . . . far out. But I write songs basically the same way, which is any way. It’s mainly just when I’ve got a minute, but that can come in any different form. Just sit around . . . if I feel like playing my guitar, a song comes out. That’s the same as it’s always been.”

当一个恋家男并没有影响他写歌，他说。毕竟McCartney一直是披头士里更温柔，更流行的一面。"我想的东西基本还和以前一样，唯一不同的是，我会去做一首像'Mary Had a Little Lamb'（Wings早期单曲）这样的歌，这首是我孩子想要的。有限制吗？可能吧。我唯一能想到的就是不想太......扯太远。但我写歌的方法基本是一样的，那就是没有方法。基本就是，如果我有一分钟时间，任何形式的一分钟。就随便坐着也行......如果我觉得想弹吉他，一首歌就出来了，我写歌一向这样的。"

Onstage, Linda McCartney stays discreetly in the shadows, behind her keyboards, for the first few numbers, leaving Paul looking unattached at least for a while. When he introduces her as “my better half,” she gets a roar of approval. In Detroit, with Paul on piano, she steps up to a vocal mike in front of the keyboards only after the 19th song has passed. Number 20 is “My Love,” and she places her hands, rather dramatically, on her hips, as if to show the crowd just who “does it good.” But for the most part, she is there to lend able support to the band. And she has developed into a capable backup vocalist, and a spirited rock & roll cheerleader.

Linda在最初几首歌一直藏在键盘后呆在阴影里，显得Paul有一段时间身边空荡荡。当他介绍她为 "我的另一半 "时，她得到了一片叫好。在底特律，Paul弹着琴，过了第19首歌，她才走到键盘前的话筒前。第20首是 "My Love"，她很戏剧性地将手放在臀部上，仿佛在向观众展示谁才 "does it good"。但她大多情况是为了给乐队强有力的支持。她已经变为一个能干的后援伴唱，和一个元气的肉啃肉拉拉队长。

WINGS IS A POP MACHINE that has produced five albums in five years, with singles filling in the occasional lags. And now, as McCartney had hoped before the most recent personnel were affixed, it is a traveling band as well, with annual U.S. tours a real possibility. As such, there is less time for other projects but McCartney is still hoping to do the songs and score for a full-length animation film of Rupert, a British cartoon character. Rupert, McCartney explained, is a bear. “I like Walt Disney cartoons,” he says. “They sort of live forever.”

Wings是流行音乐老黄牛，五年内出了五张专辑，偶尔的空档还有单曲填充。现在，正如McCartney对最近才定下来的阵容期望的一样，Wings成为了一支巡演乐队，每年巡演一次美国都有可能。这样一来，开展其他项目的时间就更少了，但McCartney还是希望能为英国卡通人物Rupert的长篇动画电影写歌做配乐。他解释说，Rupert是一只熊。"我喜欢迪士尼动画片，"他说，"它们总是充满活力。"

Rupert the bear is not exactly Yellow Submarine, in which, you remember, the Fab Four took on the Blue Meanies in defense of good old Pepperland and what it stood for: music, beauty and color. And some other stuff. Without getting into what the real-life Beatles seemed to stand for, one wonders what McCartney stands for today.

小熊Rupert风格并不像 "黄色潜水艇"，在黄潜中Fab Four反抗Blue Meanies,以捍卫old Pepperland的美好和它所代表的：音乐，美丽与多彩。还有其他一些东西。撇开现实生活中的披头士代表什么不谈，McCartney现在支持什么呢？

“Same goals exactly,” he says, with no hesitation. “It is still peace and light.”

"目标一模一样，"他毫不犹豫，"还是和平与光明。"

A year and a winter ago, another former Beatle went on tour and, to put it mildly, flopped. George Harrison had maturity, sincerity and the best intentions on his side. He appreciated the Beatles and his role in the phenomenon, he said, but he had grown up, changed, and did not care to dwell in the past. And to let everyone know how firmly he felt, he did a two-and-a-half-hour show dominated by Indian music. He did four Beatles songs, and this only after active encouragement from fellow musicians on the tour. He changed lyrics in three of the four Beatles songs, and rearrangements (along with George’s overworked, hoarse voice) turned them into hardly reasonable facsimiles of the songs many in the audiences had wanted to hear.

一年多前，另一位披头去巡演，委婉说，结果有些flop。George Harrison成熟、真诚也目的明确。他说自己很欣赏披头士乐队以及他在这一现象中的作用，但他长大了也变了，不会留恋过去。为了让大家知道他有多坚定，他做了一个以印度音��为主的两个半小时的演出。他��的四首披头士的歌，也是在巡演中同行的音乐人积极鼓励下才唱的。一共四首披头士的歌，他改了三首的词，重新编曲（加之George过度疲劳沙哑），与观众期待的相比有些四不像。

Paul and Linda attended Harrison’s Madison Square Garden show, Paul disguised in Afro wig, shades and walrus mustache, “and we loved it,” he says. He agrees that George had the right, at whatever critical cost, to say, “This is me, now.”

Paul与Linda参加了George的麦迪逊广场花园演唱会，Paul乔装打扮，戴着非洲假发，架着墨镜，贴上海象胡子，"我们很喜欢，"他说。他认为乔治有权利说："现在这样子的我，就是我自己。"无论代价。

People, says McCartney, have this . . . attitude about the Beatles. “There was some girl on holiday and we were talking to her. She’s a real average British girl and she sort of summed up her view of the Beatles: these lads from Liverpool, lovely, cheery and singing lovely songs . . . and then, drugs! And they all went crazy on drugs. And that was the end of the story for her. Well, that’s kind of silly. And I think there’s a lot of people approaching the new shows like that. ‘Oh, well, can they actually stand up there when they were once the Beatles.’ You just have to say, ‘Well, this is me now, sorry, folks.’ Sergeant Pepper‘s a big change from the record before it. That was us then. So I think George is just taking it very naturally and saying, ‘This is me.’ “

McCartney说，人们对披头士乐队有这种......的态度。"我们有次和一个正在度假的普通英国女孩聊天，她总结了她对披头士的看法：几个利物浦小伙子，可爱、快乐，唱着小曲......然后，Drug！他们开始疯狂搞drug。她以为这是最后的结果。其实这有些啥。我认为有很多人看我们的演出时想，"他们当年还是披头的时候在台上究竟站不站得住啊？“ 你只需要说，"现在这就是我了，对不起，伙计们。”Sergeant Pepper和之前的唱片完全不同。那就是当时的我们。所以我觉得乔治只是很自然在说，“这就是我“。

McCartney has said he doesn’t want to get into criticizing Harrison, but the producer in him finally wins out: “If I’d been producing him and if I’d been his impresario on that tour,” he says, “I would have asked him to do a few more songs he was known for. And also to stick to the arrangement a little bit.” McCartney puts on a good-natured look. “To which he’d probably say, ‘Piss off,’ and good luck to him.”

McCartney曾说过，他不想去批评George，但他内心的制作人的一面憋不住了。"如果我是他的制作人，是他的巡演经纪人，"他说，"我会让他多唱几首他比较出名的歌，以及坚持对编曲发表一下意见，" 麦卡特尼拿出一��好脾气的样子，"不过我猜他会对我说一句'滚蛋'。祝他好运咯。"

But, he adds, “I can see his attitude totally.” On the first Wings tours – a limited, bus-hopping affair to British universities in 1972, a larger European swing in ’73 – “We did the same thing; just no Beatles whatsoever. I’ll tell you the truth: it was too painful. It was too much of a trauma. It was like reliving a sort of a weird dream, doing a Beatles tune. One of the guys promoting us on that European tour said, ‘At the end, you should just come on with a guitar and do “Yesterday.” ‘I thought, ‘Oh God, I couldn’t face it.’ Because there was a lot of rubbish on, you know. We were into fighting for a while, we were being poisoned against each other by various people, mainly by one man who shall remain anonymous.”

他补充说，"我完全理解他的态度。" 在第一次Wings巡演中--1972年在英国大学校园进行的一次限量、在大巴上穿梭的活动，73年在欧洲的大巡演--"我们也做了同样的事情，完全不想有披头元素。老实告诉你：这太痛苦了，太殇了。唱披头士的作品像是在做一个怪梦。有一个欧巡宣传组的人说，'你最后应该拿着吉他上台唱Yesterday。'我想，'天哪这怎么面对。当时垃圾事情一大堆，有一段时间我们在大吵，我们之间的关系被各种人荼毒，主犯我名字都不想提。"

The man, of course, was Allen Klein, who became manager of John, George and Ringo in May 1969, over McCartney’s protests. As tension in the studios mounted, as Apple teetered, and as Ringo, John and Paul announced separate threats to split, McCartney suspected Klein of taking more than his share of Apple’s money. In spring 1970, in order to take action against Klein, he was forced to sue Apple – and the other Beatles themselves – for dissolution of the group. After several difficult years, the years of the rubbish, Lennon, Harrison and Starr, along with others involved in Apple, filed suit in London against Klein, for “fraud,” for taking “excessive commissions” and for “otherwise mismanag[ing]” his clients. Klein turned around and filed a suit, in New York, against the three ex-Beatles, Yoko Ono and Apple for more than $63 million in damages and future earnings; Klein enjoined McCartney as part of a “conspiracy” to damage or injure him and his company, seeking damages of $34 million plus interest. The London case against Klein is scheduled to go to court next January.

这个人就是Allen Klein，即使McCartney强烈抗议，他还是于1969年5月成为John、George和Ringo的经纪人。工作室局势愈加紧张，Apple也摇摇欲坠��Ringo, John和Paul分别威胁着说要解散，McCartney更是怀疑Klein多拿了Apple的钱。1970年春，为了反抗Klein，他被迫起诉Apple—以及其他乐队成员—他要求解散乐队。过了十分垃圾的几年后，Lennon, Harrison and Starr以及其他与Apple有关的人在伦敦对Klein提起诉讼，指控他 "欺诈"、收取 "过高的佣金 "以及 "各种管理不善"。Klein转而在纽约对三位前披头士、小野洋子和Apple提起诉讼，要求赔偿超过6300万美元的损失和未来收益；克莱因指控McCartney暗地里想损害他以及公司，要求赔偿3400万美元加利息。对克莱因的案件将于明年1月在伦敦开庭审理。

McCartney hopes to steer clear of the trial, he says, but will cooperate with testimony – “anything that can help. I just want everyone’s head to be clear, to get on with what they do.” Klein’s countersuit, McCartney says, “is an old manager’s trick; the best form of defense being attack. It’s ridiculous what he’s doing. Even for himself. He should just get on with his business and think, ‘Well, Christ, I got the Stones’ old masters, I got this’ – he had a half million out of the company, so he’s had a bit, you know. But he’s just trying to hang in there, to prove a point. It’s a bit … to me it’s very like the Nixon thing, of ‘I said I was a goodie and I’m damn well going to prove it.’ “

他希望避开审理，但表示还是会配合作证--"只要我能帮忙就行。我就希望大家头脑清醒，能够继续自己的生活。" Klein的反诉，McCartney说,"这是经纪人的老伎俩了，最好的守是攻，这做法太可笑，这手法就算是Klein也太下作了。他应该继续做他的生意，然后想，'欧好的我拿到了滚石的版权，我搞到了这个那个'--他从公司搞到了50万，所以他有点小钱。但他一直挣扎着证明自己的观点。这有点... ... 我觉得，蛮尼克松的，'我说了，我是个好人，我特么要证明自己是个好人。“

With the pressures between him and the others off, McCartney found the songs coming back. “You think, well, they’re great tunes, I like the tunes. When we played them we’d get a bit nostalgic, think, ‘Oh, this is nice, isn’t it.’ So I just decided in the end, this wasn’t such a big deal. I’d do them.”

随着他和另外三人之间的矛盾减退，McCartney发现那些歌自己又回来了。"你会觉得，嗯，它们是很棒的曲子，我喜欢。我们演奏的时候觉得有些怀旧，但会想，'这很好，不是吗'。所以我还是决定唱一些披头士的歌，没什么大不了。"

McCartney, in fact, is doing only one more Beatles song than George did on his tour. He, too, wanted to play down the Beatle identity (the tour is billed “Wings over America” and McCartney’s name does not appear on tickets or advertising). He selected the songs at random, he says, rejecting “Hey Jude” as a closer simply because “it didn’t feel right,” and choosing instead a song played on previous tours but never recorded, an all-out jam rocker called “Soily.”

McCartney在巡演中其实只比George多唱了一首披头士的歌。他也想淡化披头士的身份（巡演名字是 "Wings over America"，McCartney的名字没有出现在门票和广告上）。他选歌随机，但拒绝了 "Hey Jude "作为终曲，因为 "感觉不对"，而是选择了一首在之前的巡演中演过但从未录制过的歌，一首名为 "Soily "的即兴摇滚。

But the difference between Harrison and McCartney is in the faithfulness of Paul’s arrangements, so that the horn section does a credible impression of a cello on “Yesterday,” and “Lady Madonna” is churned out happily, and “The Long and Winding Road” and “Blackbird” are almost straight off the records. Only on “I’ve Just Seen a Face,” played on amplified 12-string Ovation guitar, with the McCartneys’ and Laine’s voices blending together in a folky, Rooftop Singers style, does he wander.

但Harrison 和McCartney区别在于Paul他忠于编曲，所以“Yesterday”中，铜管部分模拟了大提琴，“Lady Madonna”也带动快乐气氛，The Long and Winding Road”和“Blackbird”几乎是直接从唱片上下来的。只有在 "I've Just Seen a Face "中，用了放大器的12弦Ovation吉他演奏，McCartney和Laine的声音融合在一起，以一种Rooftop Singers的风格，才变了样。

In Toronto, there was a rash of reunion rumors. By show time, scalpers outside were happily selling their tickets for $50 and $60 apiece, while inside, film crews from as far away as London had their cameras hoisted and ready. From the first show in Texas, there had been talk that the once-again-friendly Beatles might do a friendly number together. In New York, where Lennon lives, similar talk persists. And in London, “Yesterday,” the single, leads a pack of two dozen Beatles reissues invading the pop charts.

多伦多场充斥着重组传闻。到了演出时间，场外的黄牛们以每张50美元60美元的价格开心卖着票，而在场内，大老远从伦敦来的摄制组也已举起相机准备好了。从德克萨斯的首演开始就有传言说，重归于好的甲壳虫可能会一起表演一段。在Lennon住的纽约类似的传言依然存在。而在伦敦，“Yesterday”这首单曲引领着二十几张重新发行的披头士单曲，又杀入了榜单。

McCartney is pleased about “Yesterday.” “It happens to coincide, luckily for us. It’s bringing it to people’s ears. That’s the main thing, really, ’cause if you’re not in with a single or record, people just tend to forget.” He is not wary of an acetate Beatlemania leading to even more fervent calls for a reunion.

McCartney对“Yesterday”很满意。"这是个巧合，我们挺走运的。它又重新传入了人们的耳中。这真的很重要，因为如果出的不是单曲或唱片，人们就会忘。"冲着唱片去的Beatlemania呼唤出的重组，他对此并不担心。

“We maybe could be together for a thing but it always feels to me like it would be a bit limp.” In response to an American promoter’s offer of between $30 and $50 million for one Beatles concert, McCartney told a reporter that he would not participate in a reunion purely for money. Now, in Toronto, he is qualifying that remark.

"我们可能会在一起做些项目，但我总觉得缺些什么。"美国有人对一场披头士演唱会报价3000万到5000万美元，McCartney回应记者说，他不会纯粹为了钱而重聚。现在在多伦多，他再次强调了这句话。

“The truth is very ordinary. The truth is just that since we split up, we’ve not seen much of each other. We visit occasionally, we’re still friends, but we don’t feel like getting up and playing again. You can’t tell that to people. You say that and they say, ‘How about this money, then?’ ‘Or how about this?’ And you end up having to think of reasons why you don’t feel like it. And, of course, any one of them taken on its own isn’t really true, but I was just stuck for an answer, so I said I wouldn’t do it just for the money anyway. And I saw John last time, he says, ‘I agreed with that.’ But there’s a million other points in there. A whole million angles.

"真相很普通。事实就是，我们分开后，就没怎么见过面。我们有时会去做客，也还是朋友，但我们不想一起表演了。可对大众不能这样说。这么说他们会问，"给你这个数，怎么样？""或者这个那个，怎么样？"。最后要强行憋出不想这么干的理由。当然，任何一个单独的理由都不是真实的，但我必须要给一个答案，所以我说我不会为了钱而去做。上次见到John他也说："我同意"。但其实原因有一百万个，角度也有一百万个。“

“I tell you, before this tour, I was tempted to ring everyone up and say, ‘Look, is it true we’re not going to get back together, ’cause we all pretty much feel like we’re not. And as long as I could get everyone to say, ‘No, we’re definitely not,’ then I could say ‘It’s a definite no-no.’ But I know my feeling, and I think the others’ feeling, in a way, is we don’t want to close the door to anything in the future. We might like it someday.

"这次巡演前，我很想给每个人打电话问，'我们是不是真的不会重组了？‘因为我们都觉得自己不会同意重组了。只有我让大家都说出'不，绝对不会'，我才能说'这是绝对不可能的'。但我知道自己的感觉，我也觉得其余三个在某种程度上，都不想向任何可能性关上大门。所以有一天我们会改变主意也说不定。

“Again, talking to John before the tour, I’m saying to him, ‘Well, are you coming to the show at Madison Square?’ ‘Well,’ he says, ‘Everyone’s kind of asking me, “Am I going?” Should I go?’ And I’m saying, ‘Oh, god, that’s a drag, isn’t it. You just can’t even come out and see our show.’ So there are these other involvements. If anyone comes, they feel like they’ve got to get up. Then they get up, we’ve got to be good. Can’t just get up and be crummy, ’cause then they say, ‘The Beatles really blew it on the Wings tour,’ or something. So, but you see how long I’ve taken just to answer this question. God, it goes on forever. So you can see why I just wanted to say no.”

"我又要说了，巡演前和约翰聊天，我问他，'你会来麦迪逊广场的演出吗？"他说，"每个人都问我，去吗？应该去吗？"我说，'天哪这太扯了，你都不能出来看我们的演出。‘所以这件事有太多牵扯。如果有任何一个来��，其余的会觉得自己必须来。既然大家都到了，我们就板上钉钉重组了。既然四个都到了就不能表现很差劲，不然人们会说‘披头士的Wings巡演上的表演真烂。’所以，你看我真的花了好多时间回答这个问题，这问题从来没停过。现在你懂我为什么我只想说 ‘不‘了吧？“

And yet, McCartney just cannot close the door.

然而McCartney依然没有断绝人们念想。

“We’ve left it,” he says, “if John feels like coming out that evening, great, we’ll try and get him in. Have it all cool, no big numbers. We’ll just play it by ear.”

“我们说过，如果有一晚John想再次出动，我们会试着和他一起玩。淡定面对，不要搞很宏大的歌，咱们凭感觉表演就行。“

The emotional high point of the concert, of course, is “Yesterday,” but the showstopper is “Live and Let Die,” the song McCartney wrote for a James Bond film. In concert, Wings attacks the audience with powder kegs, strobes, smoke, syncopated spotlights, and the laser machine gunning string beams of light from back of the stage to the opposite end of the hall. And the music – teasing, then exploding into rat-a-tat violence – fully warrants the effects.

演唱会的高潮自然是“Yesterday”，但重头戏是麦卡特尼为007电影写的“Live and Let Die”。演唱会上，Wings用火、闪光灯、烟雾、射灯，以及激光机从舞台后方向大厅另一端射出的光束照向观众。而音乐--先是挑逗，然后发出猫捉老鼠般的火爆--也完全配得上这些效果。

For “Band on the Run,” the last number before the encore call, a film of the shooting of the album cover is projected onto a movie screen; behind other songs, paintings – and one cartoon – appear on another screen, behind the band. The paintings, McCartney says, are by Magritte and David Hockney; the etchings of Magneto and Titaniun Man are by Marvel Comics. “It’s all art,” says the Beatle.

对于"Band on the Run"，也就是安可声爆发前的最后一首，专辑封面拍摄的影片投影在荧幕上，其后还有画作--还有一个动画--出现在乐队后另一屏幕上。McCartney说，这些画作是Magritte和David Hockney的作品；Magneto and Titaniun Man的蚀刻画是漫威漫画的。"这都是艺术，"这位披头说。

Before the tour, the best guesses had Wings grossing $4.5 million for 28 shows in 20 cities. Since then, a huge show has been added in Seattle – at the 60,000-capacity King Dome – and additional concerts have been added in Los Angeles and Chicago. The gross should be over $5 million, roughly a million more than the Harrison tour. But the net should be another story, given the lavishness of the stage show, the size of the entourage (17 with Showco, nine-piece band, family, friends, publicists, manager, security and various other aides) and the private Braniff-leased Bac 1011 jet that flies the band back to a base city after every concert – not to mention a mess of Wings memorabilia. Out in the lobbies, fans can pick up a T-shirt, a program and a poster. But backstage, for the touring party, there are Wings jackets, T-shirts from all the different tours, badges, pins, patches and medallions. Linda wears jeans with “Wings” embroidered on a back pocket; she and Paul wear matching ivory wings on necklaces. And the crew drinks from Wings paper cups.

巡演前， Wings在20个城市的28场演出的最高的收入估值是450万美元。此后，西雅图加了一场--在能容纳6万人的King Dome，洛杉矶和芝加哥也加场了，所以总票房应该超过500万美元，大约比Harrison巡演多出100万。但考虑到高级的舞美、随行人员的规模（Showco公司的17人舞美团队、9人乐队、家人、朋友、公关、经纪人、保安和其他各种助手），以及每场演唱会结束后乐队飞回大本营城市的Braniff Bac 1011私人飞机钱，利润应该是另一件事--更不用说各种Wings周边了。乐迷们在大厅可以拿到一件T恤、一份场刊和一张海报。但在后台，对于巡演大队来说，有Wings的夹克、各种巡演T恤、徽章、胸针、补丁和奖牌。Linda穿的牛仔裤后袋上绣有"Wings"字样；她和保罗在项链上戴着情侣象牙色Wings项链。大家还用 "Wings "纸杯喝酒。

The in-group level of a kind of Wingsmania is furthered by the chronicling of this tour: concerts are being recorded for a possible album, filmed for a possible movie, photographed separately by two cameramen for the press and a possible book, and sketched, courtroom-artist style, for possible future paintings or inclusion in another possible book.

巡演拍摄进一步提高了乐队内的"Wingsmania"的级别：演唱会可能会被录制成一张专辑，也可能拍摄成一部电影，有两位摄影师，分别为为媒体需要和以及一本可能发行的书，甚至被画下来，以courtroom-artist的风格，为未来可能出版的绘画或另一本可能的书提供草图。

But all these projects, McCartney says, aren’t even that probable. “It’s all ‘in case.’ ” In case some day he wants a film, a photo, a record, even a sketch of the first Wings American tour. It’s nice to look back.

但McCartney说这些项目都是“不一定“，”只是为了以防万一“。万一哪天他想回顾这次Wings美巡，搞一个电影，一张照片，一张唱片，甚至是画什么的。能用来回顾一下也不错。【你把硬盘交出来。。。】

It is 8:30 now, the Wings are all in costume and they should be onstage by now. They are instead in an upstairs room backstage. Here, they manage to oblige the executives of Capitol Records/EMI of Canada, shake hands all around, accept six gold and platinum albums, pose for photographs, have a laugh or two and apologize for having to run – all within three minutes. But everybody, in the end, is happy.

八点半了，乐队都穿上了服装，也已经应该在舞台上了，他们却在后台楼上房里。在这里，他们答应了加拿大Capitol唱片/EMI公司的高层，正在四处握手合影留念，收了六张金唱片和白金唱片，笑了一两声，并为不得不跑路而道歉--这些都在三分钟之内搞定了，不过大家最后都很开心。

The local interviewers are still afloat; they’ve been informed that after the show Wings have to make a quick getaway because their jet has to be off the runway by midnight, to comply with a noise-abatement ordinance. So they are not planning to get any time with McCartney.

当地采访人员还在四处飘荡，他们已经知道，演出结束后，Wings必须赶紧走，因为他们的飞机必须在午夜之前飞走，不然会违反噪音规定。所以他们也不指望能与McCartney有任何时间相处。

But after the concert, with Showco breaking down the light-stands, the sound system and the stage, with band members, security guards, aides, photographers and the sketch artist all scurrying around, and with the five Fleet-woods already warmed up and purring, Brian Brolly, the manager, gathers up the local reporters and hustles them into the dressing room, apologizing all the way. They will have just about two hot minutes.

但演唱会结束后，Showco在拆灯架、音响系统和舞美，乐队成员、保安、助手、摄影师和画手都在四处乱窜，五辆limo正在待命，经纪人Brian Brolly则召集当地记者，边催他们进化妆间，一路道歉。他们时间紧张，大概只有两分钟。

McCartney, back in street clothes, greets them, looking relaxed and interested. He apparently wants to do this right, too. He shows them a painting a friend has done of him and Linda and they proceed to field a dozen questions, about musical roots, the first time Linda saw Paul (Beatles, Shea Stadium, 1966) and, of course, the rumors about the Toronto Beatles reunion. Brolly gets itchy and clears his throat and the room all at once, and the McCartneys scram into their limo and screech away.

McCartney穿回日常装向他们打招呼，看着很轻松也很有兴趣。他显然也想把采访做好。他展示了一幅朋友为他和Linda作的画，然后他们继续回答了十几个问题，关于他们音乐作品的源头，Linda怎样第一次见到Paul（披头士，Shea体育场，1966年【？？？？？】），当然，还有关于披头士乐队会在多伦多重聚的传闻。Brolly等不及了，咳了咳嗓子开始清场，McCartney夫妇忙不迭钻进limo离开了。

Outside, a knot of the faithful wave to them and come up with a modified ovation. It is not exactly Wingsmania, and it is by no means Beatlemania. But it sure seems like rock & roll.

场外，一团团忠实观众向他们挥手致意。这不完全是Wingsmania，也绝不是Beatlemania，但它确实很肉啃肉。

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apollexander · 5 years ago

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我的 2010 - 2019 十佳游戏

去月球（To the Moon）——悲伤逆流成河释义：临终老人心底最深处的悲伤，在回忆的逆流中渐渐浮现，凝聚成一曲《For River》。

我对像素画风并没有什么情怀。但去月球让我在一个晚上一口气打通，沉浸于伤感之中久久不能忘怀。这游戏并没有多少游戏性可言，几乎完全依靠出众的剧本以及精巧的非线性叙事手法来打动玩家。亲情、爱情、回忆，足以打动每一个人。在配乐方面，同一首曲子的不同编曲构思巧妙，表达出更为细腻的情感。如果你愿意花几个小时体验一个动人的故事，那么去月球不容错过。开发者在此后又发布了一只鸟的故事和寻找天堂，但在我看来都没有去月球的浑然天成感。

行尸走肉（The Walking Dead）——嚷嚷着RPG剧情至上的人，其实应该来玩Telltale的游戏。

在2012年，Telltale这一套美剧式播片游戏还是非常新颖的。剧本的结构非常成熟。每一集都有完整的起伏，情节扣人心弦而保持悬念。我必须在限时中选择对话选项，而对方又会给出合情合理的回应。另一方面，激烈的冲突总会无可避免地降落到我头上。我必须在两难之中做出选择，并承担所有后果。相比此公司后续作品而言，本作最为动人之处在于，它真的让我沉浸到主角的情感之中，为了自己的终极目标而战。尤其是玩到最后，我的感觉就是“拼死也要把克莱门汀安全送走”。我��自己拷了起来，流着泪告诉她自己被丧尸咬伤的事实。一边传授她生存技巧，一边连哄带骂地赶她离开。甚至我都没有要求她给我一枪，就为了节省一颗子弹。

奇异人生（Life is Strange）——你的身影，失去平衡，慢慢下沉，想回到过去。

几年之后，Telltale已经把自己那一套做烂了。故事越来越套路化，情节也出现许多不合理之处。然而Dontnod的奇异人生让我看到了新的创意。虽然它也是限时选对话的玩法，但多了一个时间倒流的设定。这一设定不但是故事的重要一环，同时也给玩法带来一丝新鲜感。最终章里，我又找到了玩行尸走肉的感觉，仿佛化身为主角，不计后果地在时间漩涡中来回穿梭，只为拯救一个人。然而，面对不可逃避的天谴，我最终只能无力地放手。值得一提的是，奇异人生的故事发生在中学校园，这又是一个亮点。毕竟，谁没有过青春呢？

极限竞速地平线3（Forza Horizon 3）——我踏上风火轮，在漂移青春。

虽然前三个游戏都是故事为王，可其实我并不是一个故事党。通常开放世界最无聊的是跑路，然而地平线3告诉我，跑路是最好玩的。地平线3经常给我玩了一个晚上但又好像啥都没玩的感觉。但在我眼里，它是为数不多能让我觉得过程大于结果的游戏。尤其是配合Xbox无需退出游戏的特性，开机即玩，关机则睡。没事就打开来飙两局，听着动感电音，飞驰在蓝天白云下，能洗去一天劳累。只要勤恳打工，法拉利、兰博基尼、布加迪什么的也不在话下。真属居家必备，老少咸宜。DLC中的风火轮赛道就像过山车一样，玩起来更加刺激。4代和3代总体差不多，多了个季节的变化，值得一追。

帝国时代2：决定版（Age of Empire 2: Definitive Edition）——大家听好了，以后重制就按这个标准来。

我真没想到如此古老的游戏，居然焕发了第二春。从被遗忘的帝国以来，这个老游戏居然又增加了一倍的民族数量，以及对应的新兵种、新机制，还有好多好多战役。决定版和征服者相比，至少也是资料片级别��更新，所以我把它加入这个游戏列表。我��过圣女贞德率领法兰西人民绝地反击，也见过阿提拉上帝之鞭打得罗马人寝食难安。如今，我还能跟随西哥特王国、倭马亚王朝、帖木儿四方征战。感谢微软，让我又能够快乐地“伐伐伐伐伐伐木工”了。

文明5（Civilization V）——当古文明只剩下难解的预言，传说就成了永垂不朽的诗篇。

欧美没有知名游戏制作人？席德梅尔。

欧美游戏过于追求拟真而丧失游戏性？席德梅尔的文明！

虽然文明系列并非每一作都由席德梅尔亲自设计，但无疑都深受他的理念所影响。席德梅尔认为，文明的基本规则简单明了，所有系统都直接易懂，但各系统之间的互动很有趣。玩家需要仔细考虑它们的相互影响，作出最有利的决策。另一方面，这些决策的后果在一定程度上可以预料，因此玩家总是会想要看到“下一回合”的变化。席德梅尔还表示曾考虑让玩家体验文明从崛起到堕落的感受，在游戏中遭受挫折。然而，他们发现玩家一旦遭遇重大挫折，就会读取5个回合前的存档，因此放弃了这一思路。

这样朴素而本源的设计思想，造就了大受欢迎的文明系列。而文明5是我在系列中玩过的第一款，也是唯一一款。在无数个“下一回合”中，我感觉自己时而化身为文明统治者，时而又超脱于文明之外。我既是指挥官又是国王，既是工人又是上帝。所以我至今没玩文明6，一来是不太喜欢更加卡通的画风，二来却是可能挤不出那么多个回合的时间来玩了。

侠盗猎车手5（Grand Theft Auto V）——人人生而平等，造物者赋予他们若干不可剥夺的权利，其中包括生命权、自由权和追求幸福的权利。

尽管我只玩了一遍故事模式，并没有在联机模式中刷刷刷，但我依然爱上了这个游戏。在这个幻想题材大行其道的世界，现实题材显得一点都不时髦。然而，和文学、影视等载体一样，现实题材的游戏是最难做好的，也是最深刻的。R星精益求精地为我们展现了一个几近真实的美国。不仅仅是拔枪吓跑路人这种简单的把戏，而是一整个合乎逻辑自行运转的世界。你可以像一个匆匆过客一般随波逐流，也可以在任务中体验一把美国梦。三个主角个性鲜明，各有各的不幸，而在幸福方面却是相似的追求——挣大钱。在创新的POV叙事中，三人的命运交织成描绘众生的画卷，令人回味不已。在你的身边，很可能就有像小富、老麦，甚至老崔那样的人。这只有极其细致的刻画才能够引起玩家的共鸣。

那么，GTA6什么时候出来？

荒野大镖客2（Red Dead Redemption 2）——That's the way it is.

R星再一次用剧本和沉浸体验征服了我。尽管这游戏操作上确实有不少反人类的设置，但我真正难以忍受的只是跑马时要不停地点按。更重要的是，我愿意为了体验这个故事而忍受那种不便。虽然无论是玩法还是情节都不如GTA5那么爽快，但那种如鲠在喉的压抑感更加刻骨铭心。我对美国西部时代也没有情怀，然而在游玩中，我完全和主角产生了共情。我和他一起去打猎，一起去遛马，一起去杀人放火，一起去约会看戏。直到最后，我简直也要和他一起死去了。

R星式游戏由以下几部分组成：

贴近真实逻辑运作的动态世界（这只是骨架）；

反映众生相的一群人（这才是更重要的）；

贴近真实逻辑发展的情节；

很多很多经费以及极强的项目管理。

在GTA5和RDR2面前，大部分所谓电影化游戏的演出，也只是舞台剧水平而已。（当然，玩法是另一个话题。）

在RDR2中，R星的创新之处主要有两点。一个是结合手柄肩键来和NPC进行各种互动，拓展了交互性。另一个则是巧妙地设置了随机遭遇的触发，既不会让你在野外无聊，又不会显得刻意。

唯一不足之处在于，尾声部分衔接得并不是太好。我对约翰并没有什么情感，而且尾声流程也太长了，甚至可能作为DLC更加合适。

最后，RDR2的画面极其精美，各种地貌都有着独特的风情。我甚至头一次在游戏旅途中停下来观看日出的全过程。多么希望主角也可以像我一样，能永远惬意地享受此般美景啊。

蝙蝠侠：阿卡姆骑士——This is how it happened. This is how the Batman died.

和众多美漫粉、电影粉不一样，我是从阿卡姆系列游戏入坑蝙蝠侠的。在此之后，我又搜刮了不少电影、动画和漫画。在我看来，蝙蝠侠最吸引人的不在于算无遗策。事实上他经常吃瘪，而吃瘪后那百折不挠的意志更为可贵。实际上，蝙蝠侠最吸引人的是那勇于将自身推进至极限，甚至不惜献身，来践行守护准则的精神。蝙蝠侠为了守护哥谭，游走在扭曲的边缘，稍有差池便是深渊，所以他注定只能是黑暗骑士。

阿卡姆骑士有两个比较明显的问题。第一是蝙蝠车有些抢戏，且玩法和操纵蝙蝠侠本人有些格格不入。第二是本作虽叫阿卡姆骑士，但涉及到他的剧情都如同开启了降智光环，令人尴尬。至于PC版回炉事件，我得说幸好玩的是主机版。此外，主要反派稻草人的行动也不尽人意，还有真结局藏在谜语人背后这种丧心病狂的设置。

但以上各种缺陷，都无法掩盖小丑的光芒。在前作中死亡的小丑，以一种神奇的方式频频出场。而且，他的戏份真正做到了超越电影，只能够在游戏中体验。存在于蝙蝠侠内心的小丑，以各种幻觉的形式出现在他视野的各个角落，用夸张的姿态和喋喋不休的话语反复拷问着蝙蝠侠的内心。尤其是回顾芭芭拉、罗宾和他自己的悲剧时，蝙蝠侠在沉默中几乎无力支撑，看上去随时会被击垮。

可蝙蝠侠最终还是挺过了这一切。我丝毫不怀疑，就算芭芭拉和罗宾真的死去，蝙蝠侠也不会垮掉。就像致命玩笑的故事那样，并不是每个人在经历糟糕的一天之后都会崩溃。蝙蝠侠坚持到了最后，以极其戏剧性的方式摆脱了小丑。随着头号工具人阿卡姆骑士从天而降，所有人都得到了救赎，包括布鲁斯韦恩。

值得一提的是，阿卡姆骑士将防反大法的战斗形式打磨得炉火纯青，简直到了改无可改的地步。刺客信条、热血无赖、中土、疯狂麦克斯，虽然各有特色，但在蝙蝠侠面前都只能甘拜下风。在此以后，防反大法也逐渐让位于黑魂系列的打滚大法，然后发展到现在只狼带起的拼刀大法。

龙腾世纪：审判（Dragon Age: Inquisition）——Live well, while time remains.

我要感谢龙腾世纪，是它将我拉出了魔兽世界的大坑。我要感谢龙腾世纪：审判，是它陪伴我度过在异国他乡的一段孤独时光。在文艺作品中，最强烈的情感莫过于爱与复仇，以及时光流逝所造成的沧桑感。而龙腾世纪正是具备上述全部要素的系列作品，让我体验到跨越千年的爱恨情仇。

在市面上RPG大作中，龙腾世纪有两个极为突出的特色。第一是团队冒险。主流的大作多聚焦于主角自身塑造，而队友的戏份远远不如主角。流行的第一人称和第三人称越肩视角也体现了这一点。就连生软自家的质量效应，也相对更突出主角。但龙腾世纪延续了俯视角时代的优良传统，将一整个团队都纳入冒险旅程之中。队友们的塑造丝毫不亚于主角，甚至更加细致。你既可以给队友们精心搭配技能和装备，然后在战斗中仔细操控他们，也可以在平时和他们多多互动，参与到他们��自的故事线中。审判中的队友数量更是达到了惊人的9人之多，创下系列之最。每一个人都有着独特的人物弧，有着和表面身份错位的内在。例如不像库纳利人的库纳利人、不认同精灵文化的精灵、不知道是灵体还是人类的家伙，甚至连卡姐也不是天生的卡姐，更不用说那个幕后黑手大光头。队友有着大量过场动画和野外闲聊来丰富个性，这些内容还会随着剧情发展而有所变化。几个从开始就埋下的伏笔，到最后出人意料却又合乎情理。比如那个表现正直的灰卫，居然是潜逃杀人犯假扮，于是你回想起来他说考爷的假召唤对他没有影响。而他的整个故事线体现了关于堕落和救赎的内涵，既有立意的高度，又有文笔的深度。

龙腾世纪第二个特色则是世界延续。每一代虽然有着不同的主角，但他们都在同一个世界中以自己的选择行事。有些选择意义重大，有些则无关紧要。不管如何，龙腾世纪在历代之间尽可能地记录了玩家的选择，并在续作中加以反映。尽管有一些选择被忽视，有一些选择的后果圆得不甚合理，但龙腾世纪依然无出其右，只有质量效应三部曲可以媲美。在审判以及后续作品中，选择将被上传至网页服务Keep中，既方便玩家查看，也方便开发者统计。

龙腾世纪的这两个特色其实非常耗费开发资源。试想一下，每多做一个队友，不但要做出他和主角之间的互动，还要做出他和其他所有队友之间的互动，这个工作量是相当庞大的。因此，许多塑造只能以对话形式体现。即使如此，配音也是一份不小的支出。而延续方面，自然是越后的作品需要考虑的选择变量越多。所以，难免出现挖坑不埋和暴力填坑的现象。我只能希望世界主线能够理顺，平衡好前作影响和后续创作。

审判这一作走出了系列2代的低谷，重新回到了史诗的道路。由于开发时间不足，野外支线任务并没有仔细设计。许多来不及做演出的故事也被粗暴地以字条形式展现。不过，整个瑟达斯世界观得到了丰富的拓展。各种势力、历史事件、历史人物，除了在文本中有大量描述以外，也通过场景设计表现出来。尤其是影界之旅，那诡异的光影和无规律的物件恰如其分地体现出思维的混乱性。在3个故事DLC中，许多历史秘密纷纷浮现，却如同冰山一角，带来更多的好奇。另一方面，不同的派系，也秉持不同的世界观。教会、特文特帝国、阿瓦人、精灵、矮人、库纳利人，他们对魔法和灵体都有着各自根深蒂固的解释。这也像是我们的这个世界，有多少纷争是源于巴别塔？而在最后一个DLC中，我们终于有机会直面核心。

然而，最后的过场动画浮现出一个大大的“欲知后事如何，且听下回分解”。所以我也只能听从光头最后那一句话，“Live well, while time remains.”

0 notes

happyw-behappy-blog · 6 years ago

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陈新平，我的曾外祖母 2018-1

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这是一个老一辈的人物，平凡的身世却有着不平凡的故事。

她是我妈妈的母亲的母亲，陈新平。

她的故事，我是没有任何办法去参与或者体验的，毕竟时刻不能倒流，所以这是一个经过转述又转述再加上我自己的想象而集成的一个人物一生的故事。也许会多少增加一点传奇色彩，但是这些看似不真实的地方却也是我的母亲与我的外婆对于一个她们生命中举足轻重的女性的互动经历与形象的记忆，含有不同的人对她不同的感情与慨叹。所以也不失为一件有趣的事。而这种有点代代相传感觉的故事，也为增进家族之间的联系与感情创造了纽带，至少，让我接触到了我母亲的另一面，让我更加了解她的故事，也更加理解她，还有一些家族的历史。可惜我无法用语言来描述我母亲在为我讲述她的外婆的故事时那神采奕奕、梦回当年的样子，但那样如同与我同岁的女孩的模样仿佛让我看到了年轻时的母亲与她的外婆共处的样子。那是令我意外且欣喜的，使我很想听听我外婆将她母亲的故事，但可惜，这不能实现。

童年

由于年代有些遥远，曾外祖母的生辰我无从得知，但她的童年趣事却是从我母亲的口中得知了一些。

因为是地主家的大女儿，陈新平的生活条件各方面在童年时期还是相对富足的。既然不用为生活担心，自然就要活得精彩。

家里4个兄弟姐妹，都是比较顽皮之辈，他们最喜欢的娱乐项目就是去河里游泳。由于每年都有孩子在河里玩耍时溺亡，陈新平的父母并不允许他们接近河附近，更别说去河里游泳了。但是仅仅是家长的警告和威胁又怎么会阻止孩子们贪玩的心呢？所以他们一得空还是会偷偷溜出去，去河里游个痛快再回家。为了不让爸妈知道到底是谁出去游泳了，他们约定了相互不告发。虽然年纪小一点的弟弟时不时会因为承受不住父母的逼问讲出谁出去游泳了，但是陈新平却一次也没有告发她的弟弟妹妹。玩归玩，她还是会照顾保护自己的弟弟妹妹不让他们游到太深或者水流湍急的地方去，以确保大家的安全。按我妈的话说，我的曾外祖母从小就是一个很有担当的人，其很大一部分原因，根据我的猜想，大约是和她的身份是家中四个孩子的老大造成的。

后来家长实在没有办法了，就在他们睡觉的时候在孩子们的脚底用毛笔和墨汁写上字，这样谁回家的时候脚底的毛笔字花了或者没了就意味着谁偷偷溜出去游泳了。最后到底发生了什么我母亲也不知道，但这样有趣的家长和孩子之间的斗智斗勇就像是每个家庭的缩影一样，我仿佛看到了4个小不点局促不安地站成一排准备挨骂的样子。

但是美好的童年时光由于战争的打响被迫提前结束了。

为了逃难，大家都背井离乡，带上所有能带上的一切从任何战火可能烧到的地方逃离。陈新平一家也不例外。

由于是大地主，家里的财产虽然算不上大富大贵却也是积攒了不少，一是心里不舍，二是逃难时路上要用到的盘缠也一定不是一个小数目，家里的金条还是要能拿多少出去就要拿多少。可是明晃晃的抱在手上不是让人来抢吗？放在一个箱子里要是箱子丢了或者坏了，那可不就麻烦了？放在袋子里，那么重的金条，背在身上肯定会被怀疑。到底该怎么办？

左想右想，他们最后决定把金条缝到孩子们的棉衣里。小孩子既不会是任何人的重点关注对象，有是相对安全的群体，再加上棉衣本身厚重的质感，只要不说，可能还真就没人发现。

于是这些孩子就过上了悲催的逃难生活，每天背着沉重的金条和家长的期望，试图跑快一点不要给家里人拖后腿，却由于是负重跑，没跑几步就气喘吁吁了。

也许是因为母亲讲这些故事时的神情，尽让我有一种逃难也没有那么慌张悲惨小心翼翼的错觉。而能让母亲这样告诉我的，一定是因为曾外祖母她曾经爽朗地笑着向我母亲讲述她自己小时候的故事，没有让母亲感到任何逃难时的慌张和艰苦吧。

回望人生时，能把曾经的苦难当成有趣的故事，微笑着讲述出来，也不失为一种人生的智慧和态度。

家庭

后来曾外祖母成年之后，由于逃难的关系家族落魄了，但这并不影响她拥有一个美好的家庭。

在日子稍微安定一点时，她与一位国民党的军官喜结连理，过上了一段幸福快乐的日子。虽然家道中落，饿死的骆驼比马大，再加上军官的收入和存款，他们购置了几套不错的房子，并选了一套他们最喜欢的在那里过上了甜蜜的新婚生活。

曾外祖母是一个非常有担当的人，她认为她的弟弟妹妹们都是她的责任，都应当由她来照顾，所以哪怕嫁为人妇，她还是让自己未出嫁的妹妹和他们住在一起。听母亲说，曾外祖母的妹妹有点天生残疾，她的头是歪的，而且终生未嫁，她知道的只有曾外祖母一直照顾着她这件事，从小到老，一直。

再后来，具体什么时候我也不是很清楚，但是曾外祖母的一个弟弟也因为不知道什么原因落魄到连一个落脚之地都没有。哪怕自己家已经住着妹妹和自己的家庭，她还是毅然决然地第一时间联系上了那个弟弟，请他们一家住进她的房子，和她一起生活。

期间她还与曾外祖父一起孕育了4个女儿，性格迥异，却个个都生的肤白貌美，各有各的特点和美感。我的外婆就是他们家的大小姐，从小四个奶妈带大，娇生惯养，也养成了挑剔的习惯。

我外婆还小的时候，得了肺结核。这在当时可是相当于癌症于现在的令人惶恐。大家都避着外婆，也都用看死人的眼光看她了，但是曾外祖母没有放弃。在那个西药还尚未普及甚至被抵制被认为是威胁的时代，在肺结核约等于癌症的时代，曾外祖母不顾任何人的劝阻，卖掉了一套房子，请了一位善用西药的军医前来为外婆就诊。顶着高昂的医药费和那些没有人知道有没有用的五彩药片，救着一个大家认为注定要死的人，这在当时是另类的，是荒谬的，但也是勇敢的，果决的，值得尊敬的。也许她并不是勇于尝试新的事物，也不是有多么前卫的思想，只是因为爱女心切而放手一搏，但仅仅是这样，也说明了她是一位伟大又令人尊敬的母亲。

文革

日子就这样安安生生，平平淡淡，没有什么太大波折的过了几年，文化大革命到来了。

地主的后代加上国民党军官的妻子，这样的身份可是“重点观察对象”。丈夫被投入监狱关押拷问，家里所有的财产充公，这样突如其来的人生变故认是对谁都会是一个巨大的打击。

抄家那会儿，由于地主的身份，红卫兵来来回回往返了好几趟，翻箱倒柜甚至把地板撬开掘地三尺，只为了找那些“听说被地主藏起来的金条”。但其实，家里早就没有那么富有了，连空有其表的富有都维持不了，哪里还有什么金条呢？但那些来抄家的人似乎想不通这一点，只是一味地执着地翻找，认定了她一定是把金条藏起来了。

具体发生了什么，我也不清楚，但我想象我的曾外祖母当时一定是护着自己的四个女儿和妹妹，冷笑着看着那些像无头苍蝇一样到处翻找气急败坏的人把自己的家捣鼓地乱七八糟。她绝不会像泼妇那样骂街，也绝不会像羸弱的女子一样哭哭啼啼，她一定是坚毅的，挺拔的，不服从的。

由于家里被收的什么也没了，丈夫依旧是阶下囚，一个本该躺在丈夫臂弯中享受爱情，和弟弟妹妹一起聊聊家长里短感受亲情和尽心栽培教育后代的女子，独自一人扛起了全家人的生死。原本的富家大小姐变成了摆着小摊的街边妇人，以卖杂货为生，以一己之力抚养教育自己的四个女儿。

我想，她一定只会在夜深人静所有人都入睡之时，才会轻声抽泣，想念自己的丈夫，为女儿的生活感到惋惜，但绝对不会抱怨命运的不公，也不会因为打击而一蹶不振。现实不允许她软弱和怜惜，她自己也绝对不是软弱无能之辈。在女儿面前，在弟弟妹妹面前，笑着撑起这个家，努力让即将支零破碎的家重新并在一起，让那些害怕紧张接近崩溃的人们看到救赎，看到支柱，看到希望。

但是她成为了大家的支柱，那谁又是她的支柱呢？谁又会在她深夜悄悄落泪时安抚理解她呢？我想答案可能是没有人。

晚年

再往后的事情，就是我母亲出生之后的事情了。那时她已经从母亲变为外婆了，也依然和曾外祖父一起生活在四川，还有她的弟弟和妹妹。

我母亲出生在上海，但是当时家里的经济状况十分的拮据，在上海的奶奶也不愿意带一个拖油瓶生活。就在大家你推我让，发现这个孩子实在是难以养活的时候，曾外祖母发电告诉我外婆叫她把我母亲接到她家去抚养，她来照顾只有8个月的母亲。然而，曾外祖母家的经济状况也没有特别优越，甚至也过得有点节俭，而我母亲的到来使得她更是省吃俭用，为了给一个婴儿她应得的爱与照顾。一直到2岁多，我母亲都一直是寄住在曾外祖母家里，由曾外祖母带大。

后来，我母亲又被接回了上海生活，在上海上了小学。在母亲12岁那年，她又一次回到了四川，外婆家里住着她的妹妹和我母亲的妹妹，外婆便以没有地方给我母亲住为由，又将母亲送到曾外祖母家，由她照顾。

母亲的初中时光是在四川度过的，每当过年的时候，她收到的所有红包总是会被她的母亲收走，不允许她有零花钱用。

“外婆知道这件事以后，每年的春节就会偷偷再给我包一个大红包，在我妈不知道时给我，我就藏在鞋子里天天穿着，不让我妈发现。”我母亲讲这一段故事的时候，脸上洋溢着天真幸福的感觉，好像那些岁月留下的皱纹和银丝都在那个瞬间消失了，印出的是母亲12、13岁刚刚进入青春期那种骄傲的小大人的神情，虽然她本人不知道这件事，但我仿佛看到了曾外祖母用俏皮的语气疼爱地把红包悄咪咪地塞给我母亲，叫她自己藏好留着用的样子。

“外婆对我可好了，她很宠我。夏天我睡觉的时候她还帮我打扇子。有一年过年烤火的时候，我坐得离火太近了，一个不小心就把棉鞋的前头给烧焦了。我本来以为会挨一顿打，可是外婆知道了却开始大笑，像是听到了一个有趣的故事一样。”

不知道为什么，这些画面明明没有惊心动魄，也没有很细致的描述，我甚至从来没有见过我的曾外祖母和母亲12、13岁时的模样，却能够很自然的在脑海里浮现出母亲所描绘的画面。我就好像站在那个不大的客厅里，看着曾外祖母坐在椅子上打着围巾，当她看到母亲不安地来认错时，手里的毛线停了下来，咯咯笑着，笑得皱纹都仿佛加深了一样，惹得母亲也和她一起笑了起来，刚刚哭丧着的泪珠还挂在��颊上，眼睛里还闪着一丝丝泪光。还有曾外祖母的笑声，虽然不再清脆，却也还是悦耳的，是慈爱的，是包容的。

1992年，母亲大学毕业的那一年，她找到了她的第一份工作。从很小的时候起，她就决定要把自己的第一份工资拿来孝敬曾外祖母，也与她约好了，一拿到第一份工资，就把钱寄过去。然而，就在母亲将要拿到工资的前几天，曾外祖母过世的噩耗从四川传到了上海，传到了母亲的耳朵里。她说她不记得当时自己为什么没有去奔丧了，但是她记得她当时知道这个消息时的感觉，那是一个很明确的认知。

她说，世界上唯一一个最爱她的人走了，这世上再也没有人会这样爱她了。

母亲依旧把第一份工资寄了过去，说是全部用在了葬礼上。她说，真的是惭愧，连一个好好孝敬外婆的机会都没有。

然后她又说了一次，那是世界上唯一一个真正爱她的人，现在也不在了。

Some Words from Writer

This is my first time writing a biography about a real person. I hesitated a lot when it came to choose who to write about. I didn’t want to write about famous people because they are famous enough that people knows their stories and they have their biography written or writing. I wanted to write about someone personal, but not personal enough that I can recite his or her life story without interviewing anyone.

Then my mother said I should wrote about her grandmother, someone I am related but never met. I did not agree right away, because the only one who knew this lady was my mom, and this lady had been slept for years, many details might be forgotten.

But when I reconsider it, I realized how important and impressive this woman was if she had such a huge influence on my mom that she even wanted a biography for her. So I interviewed my mom and decided to write about this amazing lady.

She lived in a time which none of us living in a nice and comfortable room could image. She was from the last last generation I would say, when China was experiencing some of the extremest things in her history. She was strong, independent, smart, legendary. But she was also just a kind, old grandma who loved her granddaughter a lot. She was the closest one to my mother. And I was wrong about she forgetting the details, she remembers everything. Everything about this old lady who now only lives in her memory. But she will never forget, and when she reflect back, she was not my mother talking to me, she was like a girl of the age she remembered herself as when her grandma was still alive and took care of her. She was like a child when she talked about her grandma. I have never see that before. It was a feeling that is too good and vulnerable that I was afraid if I interrupt, it would gone.

And when the interview ended, my mom was crying. She said something I could never forget, not because the content, but the feeling. She was so sad, and the sadness was too real and pure.

She said, “ The only person in this world who loved me most deeply has gone. And no one would ever love me like that.”

Then she said again,

“She was the only one who truly loved me in this world. And now she is gone.“

#creativewriting #biography #reflection

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