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alfredosauce50 · 2 days ago

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One More Night

[Boxer! Denmark x reader] 14

Wordcount: 7, 647 Rating: R18+ for sex The reader is referred to as she/her.

One more night - 14 Finale part III: Locked out of Heaven

The way you reacted was as if you’d seen a ghost.

And frankly, it wasn’t so far off.

Dropping the cup in your hand, your heart stopped like you just saw something you weren’t meant to see. The glass shattered into shards on the hardwood floor, drawing the attention of every patron in the bar. Conversations halted, heads turning to watch the scene unfold.

And in a small town where everyone knew everyone, it didn’t take much to figure out that what was about to go down was filmworthy.

Philadelphia’s greatest boxing rookie just came back from the dead.

“Mat?”

His kind blue eyes, his knowing smile, his crazy bedhead like he just woke up from the longest slumber, oh, it was him, alright.

“Did you miss me?” His lips curled upwards for a gentle look.

It had been a month since Mathias was admitted to hospital with a life-threatening brain injury, and you’ve wrestled with the possibility that he may never wake up again on more than one occasion. That he may as well be dead--that you were better off moving on from him.

So to see him standing in front of you at your work, without any warning whatsoever, was as if your mind had conjured a phantom of him when you missed him the most. Only he was the real deal, all seventy-five inches of his flesh, blood, and thick-headed stupidity.

Moreover, Mathias was still in his boxing shorts, so it looked like he had just come out of the ring with not a single moment in between.

Time stopped for you the second he passed out, but it just resumed.

“Oh my God,” You gasped, plowing into his arms.

The dam was all but broken, and you burst into tears. You clung onto him like he would disappear if you didn’t, squeezing him so tight that he laughed out a breathy ‘woah’. But you didn’t care. You couldn’t.

After a month of grieving, Mathias was finally back.

“I thought you’d never wake up again! I was so scared!”

“I’m sorry, (F/N), I’m sorry,” He furrowed his brows for the deepest frown he could muster, voice trembling as he spoke. He combed his hands furiously through your hair, kissing you repeatedly on the forehead. “I never meant for this to happen. I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

“You never meant for this to happen?” You repeated faintly as you pulled back to look him in the eye. The sadness behind your gaze melted in seconds, and your face went red with a livid rage.

His face fell, realizing he was about to get torn into.

“This is exactly—” You shoved Mathias.

He knew you were furious, but he was blindsided by being pushed.

His eyes flew open as he stumbled backward. His legs were so weak, he almost fell on his back and landed himself another lengthy hospital stay, but clearly, that was the least of your worries right now.

“—what everyone told you would happen, you asshole!” You raised your voice, sobbing once. “You knew what you were doing!”

“(F/N), please,” He begged.

“I thought you’d never wake up again!” You exclaimed, this time angrily, like it was an epiphany. “I thought you were dead, Mathias!”

“I know, and I’m sorry.” He closed his eyes in defeat.

“You’re sorry?” You raised your brows.

He looked like he was about to cry, seeing how unfazed you were by his return. Or more accurately put, how mad you were to see him alive, because if he were dead, at least you could feel sorry for him.

It was a classic, come back alive, and I’ll kill you myself scenario.

“Do you know how many nights I stayed up crying about you, thinking it was my fault that I let you go back out there?”

“No.”

“—even when it wasn’t my fault at all?”

That was when you finally cracked, tears flowing all over again.

“All of this could’ve been avoided if you just stopped being so stubborn for once,” You cried. You were as quick as a whip, where everything came spilling out of your mouth like an open faucet, and the truth stung. “But you never listen to me, do you?”

Mathias burned up so badly with shame, he turned pink, and his mouth opened like he wanted to say something, but just couldn’t.

After all, what could he say?

“I can’t with you, Mat.” You sobbed, rubbing your eyes with your arm as you practically started wailing. It was the hardest you’ve ever cried, and he watched on, so ashamed of himself, he wanted to die.

He never made you cry like this, ever.

“I missed you so much, but right now, I hate myself for loving you.”

But to hear you say that made Mathias so appalled with himself, something changed in him. His eyes went wide with shock, and his brows furrowed so close together that wrinkles formed between them. It was the distinct look of self-loathing, the first of its kind.

He’d never broken you down like he did just now. But after a year of running in circles, he finally found your limit and pushed that too.

He reaped what he sowed, and this was the consequence.

A string of words that would haunt him for the rest of his life.

You bring me to my knees, you make me testify You can make a sinner change his ways

You drove Mathias back to the hospital after ending your shift early. Having been the unwilling witness to the entire exchange, your manager insisted that you take the rest of the week off. There was no discussion, just understanding. And you couldn’t be more grateful.

Not that it meant the end to your troubles.

The car ride there was completely silent. You were burnt out from all the crying, and he didn’t have the nerve to start anything.

He just sat quietly in the passenger seat, his usual, boisterous self replaced by something else entirely--he was never one to reflect on himself, let alone give up the reins in the relationship when he was always the one driving the horse. But he was loosening his grip.

And the more he thought about it, the more jarring it became.

How he always acted in the past, knowing you’d keep coming back to him. It wasn’t like you’ve never laid down your boundaries either, so it was just him disrespecting that over and over. But did it really have to get to this point for everything to finally get nailed into his head?

You were in so much pain, and not because of what happened to him. It was the pain of being in a relationship with him, of forgiving him time and time again until he had all but broken you down.

Mathias let his gaze fall to his lap with a deep frown.

He was a real jerk, wasn’t he?

Open up your gates ‘cause I can’t wait to see the light And right there is where I wanna stay

You dropped him off in front of the hospital, helping him out of the car. The Dane didn’t have trouble chasing you down to your bar, but it looked like all the adrenaline had worn off into sobering reality.

Because now, he could barely walk without support, leaning against you as you walked him all the way to the front entrance. He wrapped his arm around your frame as he tottered like a newborn babe, just what you’d expect from someone who was bedbound for a month.

And to think his first priority was to find you, you almost forgave him.

Almost.

Besides, you knew it wouldn’t be Mathias if he did it any differently, if he gave it any more thought than he did. He was always acting on impulse, and this time, it came from a deep-seated guilt.

And even though he knew he messed up, that wasn’t enough.

He still had yet to earn your forgiveness.

It was only until he got inside did he get a word from you, and not without a pitiful look first. As he stood in the door frame of the front entrance, not quite ready to part with you, he glanced at you over his shoulder with misty eyes, his lips downturned in a sad pout.

He wanted to see if you were still mad at him--and you were.

You had your arms folded with an impatient look as if to say, go on.

Mathias shed a few tears, but he didn’t make a big deal out of it. He just rubbed them away with the back of his hand, turning to leave.

You couldn’t always read him like a book, but right now, he was definitely wondering if you still loved him. And even after all the grief he just put you through, that was the one thing that could get you to cave--before you knew it, you were marching up to him with everything you had, and with your most conflicted expression yet.

He hurt you, but he still deserved the least of your assurances.

You pulled him down for a hug, feeling him melt into your arms.

“I’m getting tired of you, Mathias,” You told him, getting a slight tremble to seize his body. More tears streamed down to his chin as he began to cry, sniffling as he did. And the more you seemed to push him away, the tighter he squeezed you. “Sometimes, I don’t know if I can handle you forever, and that really scares me.”

“But you’re the only one who can handle me,” He choked.

“Then act like it,” You frowned, pulling away to look him in the eye. “Stop expecting my forgiveness because I can only take so much.

“Okay,” Mathias let out. “Just don’t let go of me, okay?”

“That’s the problem,” You sighed, gaze softening. “I don’t think I can.”

He ended up staying in hospital for six more weeks to recover.

When the doctors heard he was already up walking and talking, running, even, they could only scratch their heads at the medical miracle that was the Danish boxing star, who held an utter disregard for everything they knew, apparently. Regardless, you insisted that he go through the standard procedure of recovery like everybody else.

Monitoring brain pressure, vitals, and preventing potential seizures, followed by intensive therapy. He had to learn how to walk, eat, and use the bathroom again, but he seemed to know how to talk just fine.

During that whole period, you didn’t tell Amy or Allen a thing.

Not even Gilbert.

You felt horrible about it, seeing them brood and sulk about Mathias, all while knowing he was awake. But before you opened up that chapter, you wanted to work things out with him first.

The day he got discharged, you helped him get settled back at his apartment. You stayed over as well, telling the twins you wanted to get some alone time--which they bought, no questions asked.

That night, you lay beside him in his bed, something you missed terribly. It had been months since he’d woken up from his coma, but it only started to feel like life had resumed. Here in the privacy of his home, and without having someone hovering beside him every time he took a step, things were beginning to go back to normal again.

‘Cause your sex takes me to paradise Yeah, your sex takes me to paradise And it shows Yeah, yeah, yeah

“When I saw you talking to that guy the other night,” Mathias said in a whisper, keeping his half-lidded eyes glued to the ceiling. He was frankly exhausted, but he’d say this with his dying breath if he had to.

It took him a moment before he could get it out, chest rising and falling as he recalled the depth of his emotions that engulfed him. He wasn’t one to get jealous easily, but to witness you potentially moving on from him, he’d rather he really died just to avoid seeing it.

“It really got to me.”

“Good,” You replied, rolling your head to him.

Maybe you were being a little unkind, but the wound was still fresh.

“Then you’ll know not to do this again, because I know my word doesn’t mean anything to you.” You told him, much to his dismay.

“That’s not true.” He sighed.

“Do you really wanna argue with me about this right now?”

Mathias pursed his lips awkwardly, just like how a man would when he knows he’s already lost the argument. Another word from him and he’d just be proving your point--and end up sleeping on the couch.

But all that aside, you were kind of sexy when you were mad.

“No.”

“I thought so.”

“But tell me,” The Dane rolled his entire body to you so that he was lying on his side, propping his arm up so he could rest his face on his hand. Then, with a lopsided grin, he asked, “Would you have considered going out with him if I didn’t show up when I did?”

“How could I?” You frowned, a little irritated that he even doubted you. But you had to remind yourself that this was all in good jest, and he was really just looking for attention. “Not after a month, anyway.”

“Hey!”

“I’m only kidding.”

“You better be, because I wouldn’t look for another woman if something happened to you.” He lay back down again and pulled the covers up to his nose, closing his eyes for the most contented look.

He was so comfortable as he said it, because he meant every word. There was not a shadow of a doubt in him that he’d found the one.

“Really?” You asked faintly, gaze softening.

“Really. Like I said, who else is gonna put up with me?” He hummed.

“You’re lucky you’re in rehab right now, because I would’ve hit you with my pillow.” You glared, rolling over to let your back face him.

“Okay, I’m sorry,” Mathias apologized with a wince, sitting up so he could hug you from the side. Understandably, it was still a touchy subject for you, and he said that without thinking. But then again, he did a lot of things without thinking. “I’ll never joke about that again.”

“You better not, because it’s not funny anymore.” You huffed.

“I know, I was just being annoying.” He kissed your shoulder.

“You’re always annoying.”

“I wouldn’t say always.”

A few moments went by with him just staring down at you as if to gauge a reaction. You did your best to stifle a smile, all so you could keep feigning your frustration that was already starting to wane.

You were always so weak around him, and you hated yourself for it.

But Mathias couldn’t let you feel that way anymore.

The edges of his lips curled up slightly, though it wasn’t long before a warm smile broke out across his face. There was an intense adoration behind his eyes as he looked at you, almost to the point of worship.

But it couldn’t be worship, not when this was real.

“Thank you for being patient with me.” He nudged you.

“You’re welcome.” You uttered quietly, gaze averted to the side. Rather than saying sorry, he thanked you. It was an unexpected change of pace--to have him focus on your effort, rather than making everything about his mistakes. His guilt. And it was a welcome one.

It let you believe he was really changing this time.

“Hey,” He whispered, leaning down to you. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” You whispered back, turning to him so you could give him a proper hug as you lay beneath him. He closed his eyes as he embraced you from above, covering you with his body.

The way he held you was like a quiet promise.

That he’d never let you doubt him again.

Your face was flushed like you were about to cry. You felt strangely emotional throughout, and sure enough, you teared up. To say the words you were so desperate to say in his month-long absence, then to finally hear the words that he should’ve told you a long time ago.

Thank you for being patient with me.

It was the release you’ve always needed, and you finally got it.

‘Cause you make me feel like I’ve been locked out of heaven For too long, for too long

The next morning, you two shared a nice breakfast together before going back to your apartment to break the big news.

Usually, he’d bicker with you for a bit about what to eat--he’d want an omelette with eight eggs, whereas you’d want something on the lighter side, like fruit and yoghurt--which shouldn’t even be a problem in the first place if you two just ate different things.

Mathias just insisted that he and you ate the same thing for most meals, but this time, he just caved without another word.

“You know, Allen got really depressed about you,” You told him.

He glanced up from his bowl, his arm that went down to scoop some more yoghurt into his mouth slowing to a stop as he listened.

Meanwhile, you couldn’t find it in yourself to return his gaze, your expression riddled with anguish. Unbeknownst to him, there was also guilt to blame for the sullen look on your face. It was cruel of you to hold out on the twins, but some part of you didn’t want them to see Mathias until it felt right--and now couldn’t have been a better time.

“He thinks he killed you.”

“Well, he didn’t.” The Dane said defensively.

It was hard to imagine that anyone could actually blame themselves for what happened to him, but Allen wasn’t just anyone.

“And even if I did die, it’s not his fault.” He finished up his yoghurt in rapid scoops, scraping the bowl clean until the only remainder of it was on the sides of his mouth, which he wiped with the back of his hand. Placing it in the sink, he turned to you with a sense of purpose.

“I know, but it’s better if you tell him that yourself.” You managed a smile, humoring him on his thought process. Words could only do so much, so what better than Mathias himself to deliver the news?

And while standing strong on his own two feet?

Back at the apartment, the twins were sitting around after a lazy Sunday breakfast. Usually, you’d all be heading out to do some shopping by now, then hit up the local Chinese just in time for the Eagles to play. But you weren’t here, and they weren’t in the mood.

Ever since Mathias vanished from your lives, there was this hole that never left. He took with him all his light, leaving you all in the dark.

Maybe it wasn’t wrong of him to act like he was the center of the universe, because it was becoming painfully clear how much of an impact he had on you all. And even when the topic wasn’t about him, the weight of what happened to him lingered like a bad aftertaste.

Subtle, but still potent enough for things to not feel right.

“I’m really worried about (F/N). This is the first time she’s stayed the night out.” Amy sighed at the dining table, eyeing the door.

She just hoped you weren’t doing anything rash, or worse, out with Mathias’s replacement--not that she believed you could do such a thing. It was more of an intrusive thought than anything.

“Yeah, she’s been kinda weird lately,” Allen frowned.

He was lying on the couch on his back with his feet kicked up on the armrest, arms folded together like you would in therapy.

“When I asked her how Mathias was doing, she just smiled and told me not to worry.” He made a face. You seemed almost happier than usual, but what could possibly warrant such a sudden change?

“Maybe she was just trying to make you feel better.”

“It’s not that.”

“Then what else could it be?”

“The way you say it makes me feel really fucking bad, you know? This isn’t about me.” Allen sat up and shot her a disgruntled look.

“I hope you believe that as much as I do, because it isn’t.”

Some things were better off left unsaid, but it didn’t take a genius to figure out what she truly meant. When he didn’t answer, staring off to the side with a hard glare, she knew she had hit the nail on the head.

“It wasn’t your fault,” Amy spoke with a slow firmness in her voice, like she was begging him to see reason--only it fell on deaf ears.

“Easy for you to say. You weren’t there,” Allen murmured under his breath, not wanting to announce that she was right to assume how he was feeling. But the bitterness could be heard from miles away.

He felt responsible for Mathias’s so-called accident.

That guilt was impossible for anybody to carry, yet here he was, shouldering that guilt on his back ever since the day he went under.

Nevertheless, his point still stood, and he walked off with enough frustration that he had to raise his voice--“And I told you, stop making this about me, it makes me feel like a crazy person.”

She shut up at that, watching him go to the kitchen and come back with a tub of hummus and a carrot. Cracking the lid open with more force than he normally would’ve used, he dunked it in the tub.

“She just didn’t look sad, alright? Maybe Mathias is getting better, I don’t know. I just don’t know why she’d leave the apartment.”

“Yeah,” Amy lowered her gaze.

That was when a knock sounded on the door.

“It’s probably her,” She perked up, sliding off her chair to answer it.

Not once did it occur to her that it could be anyone else, let alone the Danish boxer that had been down and out for more than two months. She opened the door with a slight frown, not at all prepared for who was behind it--a guy who looked suspiciously like Mathias.

“Hey,” Mathias grinned.

“What. The--”

The look on her face was priceless, just what you’d expect from seeing a loved one come back from the dead, a soldier returning home from deployment. She couldn’t believe her eyes, as wide as they’d become, and she only got these words out in choppy intervals.

“--fuck.” Amy whispered, but being shocked to the bone didn’t deter her from hugging him out of reflex. “I’m not hallucinating, am I?”

“Nope, I’m really here,” The Dane laughed, squeezing her back.

“How?” She shook her head, pulling back to fathom him properly.

Mathias smiled again, almost as if to say, how what?

“I mean, you were in a coma for more than two months. How are you here? Shouldn’t you be learning how to walk and everything?”

“That’s the thing. I woke up around seven weeks ago, so I’ve done all the therapy to get myself up and going again. Amazing, right?”

Meanwhile, you were standing behind him, shrinking into yourself.

“So you’re telling me you woke up that long ago,” She spoke slowly to piece the whole puzzle together, and once she did, she turned to you, the very reason for her grief. She heated up with the utmost disbelief as she shrieked at the top of her lungs, “And you didn’t tell us?!”

“Um, surprise?” You beamed nervously.

Just as she was about to tear into you, Allen marched over.

And what he did next took you all by surprise, dispelling the brewing tension that would’ve otherwise exploded into a full-on catfight.

He engulfed Mathias in the biggest hug.

No words were spoken, just a raw display of emotion that shook you to the core. He even patted him on the back just like two old friends, but his joy soon settled into something else entirely--his expression grew strained, eyes narrowed with a harrowing kind of sadness.

“I thought you were dead, man.” Allen muttered.

Amy was so pissed at you it wasn’t even funny.

She couldn’t believe you held out on everyone, and for so long, too.

She yelled at you for ages in the living room, which wouldn’t be the first time. Usually, it was out of care for you. Having unprotected sex, spending your paycheck on something stupid, or letting Mathias have his way when what you should’ve done was put him in his place.

But what you did was irrational and selfish.

It took a while for her to calm down, and you not knowing what to say didn’t exactly help. So you let her go on as long as she had to. But like all the fights she had with you, it ended with understanding--trauma was a strange thing, so she couldn’t blame you for how you reacted.

“Now that I think about it, maybe it was better that she didn’t tell us until now,” Allen told Mathias outside on the balcony.

“Why?”

“So I wouldn’t have to watch you struggle.”

His response was hard-hitting, alright. It spoke volumes without him needing to say it explicitly--he didn’t want to see him in the same position he found himself in once, nor did he need to feel worse about not being able to stop him from getting in the ring.

And Mathias picked up on all of that perfectly.

“Listen, Allen. What happened was completely my fault. I should’ve listened to you guys the first time,” He admitted with a sigh.

The other gave a snort. It would take more than that to get him to get over it, but to hear it from the boxer himself--perhaps he could forgive himself after all. That was when Allen gave his head a shake. He should’ve been mad, but he was more amazed than anything.

Amazed by how much patience you had with this guy.

“I honestly don’t know how she puts up with you.” He mused.

“I don’t know either, but I’m gonna make it easier for her from now on. I’m gonna listen to her from now on,” The Dane said sheepishly.

“About damn time,�� Allen pursed his lips, leaning his back against the balcony. “So are you still gonna keep boxing after all this?”

“Honestly, probably not,” Mathias looked over the balcony, almost out of acceptance. He couldn’t return the man’s gaze, lest he see how much it really saddened him to admit--not being able to box anymore, even when it was the very reason he came to Philadelphia.

It was his calling, his dream, but it was crushed now.

After his coma, he simply couldn’t risk taking another punch.

“I can’t fake my way out of this one.”

“I’m sorry, man.” Allen closed his eyes.

He could hardly handle seeing Mathias like this, so low on his feet that he was practically unrecognizable. And the poor guy was doing his best to hide it, too. But he just had his whole life taken from him after working his ass off for it, and it was like looking in a mirror.

“What’re you gonna do then?”

“I’m almost done with my marine biology degree, so there’s that.”

“Oh, you wanna be a marine? Wouldn’t recommend it,” Allen cut in with a deadpan, earning a puzzled look from the blonde. That was when he cracked a grin, clapping a hand on his shoulder as he turned to leave. “I was just kidding. Have fun studying fish or whatever.”

“Right,” Mathias laughed through his nose. Just as the other was about to go back inside, something crossed his mind. “Hey, you should know that my gym is hiring. I put in a good word for you.”

“I appreciate it, but I don’t take hand-outs.” Allen waved him off.

To hear that he’d been spoken about, and in a positive light at that, he didn’t know how to react. But the gesture itself proved to be a big one--helping him find a job after such a long period of being out of the workforce. It meant a lot to him, whether he accepted it or not.

“This isn’t a hand-out, though. Ever since I told my coach about you, he hasn’t stopped asking about you,” He explained earnestly.

Only then did Allen stop, turning to him with his eyes widened.

“And we need sparring instructors.”

For a second, he was almost about to take it.

But he let self-doubt creep into him until he got cold feet again.

He was just so used to sizing things up to be bigger than they really were, it practically became an old habit he couldn’t shake.

“I don’t know, man. I don’t teach.” He gave a sigh.

Only Mathias refused to take no for an answer.

He frowned, not at all pleased by his response. Allen was seriously selling himself short, and he wasn’t about to let him pass this up.

“Oh, come on, why don’t you just give it a chance? You might like it.”

“And how would he know if I’m good at sparring?”

“Well, you were a marine,” Mathias pursed his lips like it was the most obvious point, craning his head from side to side. “And he did see you tear through a bunch of seasoned security guards like nothing.”

“Wow. And I was hoping people forgot about that,” Allen cringed, reaching up with both hands to hold his head. Nevertheless, he was weirdly flattered by the ordeal. What could’ve ended up his second biggest mistake wound up being perhaps the best decision of his life.

Saving Mathias, and now, landing him a job?

He couldn’t lie--the turnout was kind of funny.

“So, what do you say?” The Dane folded his arms, the edges of his lips curling up ever so slightly like he already knew the answer.

All his friend needed was a little encouragement, and he was well on his way to transitioning back into regular civilian life again. Because from the way they fell deep into thought, and with hope lighting up their eyes, it became evident that they were already looking up.

“I’ll think about it, actually,” Allen nodded with a growing smile, reaching over to give his shoulder a firm pat. “Thanks.”

Everyone got together to watch the birds play.

It took a bit of convincing to get Gilbert to show up, but when he did, he certainly didn’t regret it. When he saw his best friend standing in the living room, he practically tackled him in a hug. If it weren’t for their size difference, the boxer would’ve fallen right on his behind.

That Sunday ended up being the most eventful Sunday of your lives, but the best by far. Mathias was back, and so was everybody else.

“See, this is what I mean. Now that you’re back, we have an actual chance of winning,” Allen exchanged furious glances between the TV screen and the Dane, who stared at him with a dubious expression. “You see that? You fucking see that? You’re meant to be here!”

“Not this again,” Amy murmured.

The whole group was on the couches watching the latest Eagles game, except Allen, who stood in front of the television like he was part of the stadium crowd. It had been a while since he paid attention to football, but now seemed like the perfect time to get back into it.

“What’s going on?” Mathias asked nervously, not at all following with the game, nor the excited ramblings of a religious sports fan.

“He’s having his OCD superstitious time,” She said under her breath, eyeing her brother’s hand just after he bumped into the coffee table. The force pushed the remotes an inch from their spot, which he bent down to fix, moving them back into their original place. “Crazy.”

“I’ve never seen this before. Are lots of people like this in the States?”

“Unfortunately.”

“And every Sunday? You guys have it bad.” Gilbert pursed his lips as if to say, yeesh. “I thought Sundays were meant to be for relaxation.”

“Well, this is his idea of relaxation.” You mused.

“Well, it’s not very relaxing, is it?” The albino remarked.

“Oh, come on,” Allen faced you all on the couch, who were currently ogling him like some zoo animal. “You telling me it’s not a good thing that Mathias is here? How else would you explain this comeback?”

“Um, probably every other more plausible explanation out there,” Amelia stifled a snort, much to the man’s annoyance.

He was getting tired of being treated like a lunatic, even if it was a joke. It stung, but weirdly enough, he would much rather be teased constantly than coddled. It made him feel more normal, somehow.

“Screw you, Ames. You know we’re twins, right? That means we got a higher chance of having the same shit.” He pointed at her accusingly.

“Maybe that’s why you got double the stupidity.” She grinned.

Allen pursed his lips as hard as he could, like he was trying to hold himself back from saying something back. Only he couldn’t think of anything, so he resorted to the only thing he knew--Amy leapt off the couch just in time to be chased around the living room with a pillow.

“C’mere, you little shit!”

The big move came one month later.

It was only to a place ten minutes away, but that didn’t change the fact that you were leaving. Life wouldn’t be the same without you, and Allen was already having a hard time adjusting to that fact.

“I can’t believe you’re really going,” He leaned against the doorframe of your bedroom, his arms folded together for a calm demeanour.

He couldn’t find it in himself to raise any flags anymore, not when you looked so damn happy imagining your new life with Mathias. He could see it in your eyes, then the way you smiled as you laid out your things on your bed, deciding what to bring and what to leave.

He couldn’t be a part of your life on that kind of level.

He knew you were just being nice about it, but he couldn’t compete with your significant other. It took him this long to accept, but he finally made peace with it--or that was what he wanted to believe.

“I know, right?” You beamed at him. “Crazy how time flies.”

“I just know Amy’s gonna cry about it the second you leave.” Allen chuckled, his expression softening to a tender, yet bittersweet smile. “You were everything. You were basically her entire support system.”

That was when you stopped packing, turning to him with a frown.

He was trying so hard to not make it about himself, which you picked up instantly. He wore all of his emotions on his sleeve, where even now, he was doing his damndest not to let his facade break down.

“Are you gonna be okay?” You walked over until you were standing in front of him, intending to give him a hug. But he couldn’t give in.

Allen closed his eyes and inhaled a deep breath, leaning back as if to create some distance with you. He could feel his front crumbling, and that was only from you being near him--he was just that weak to your influence. However, he didn’t want to be that person anymore.

But want didn’t always get.

“Yeah,” He whispered, like it took everything in him to lie.

“Okay, then give me a hug,” You beckoned him over with a wave.

He threw his head back and ambled forward to you reluctantly, but the second you wrapped yourself around him, settling so comfortably in his chest, his resolve was shattered beyond repair. He let himself melt into the embrace, coiling his strong arms around your body.

If this were a test, he knew he just failed it miserably.

Allen didn’t need to say it for you to know how much it hurt him to see you go; the way he held you was testament enough.

“I’m really gonna miss you, Al. We’ll have to Skype every night.”

“Every night? You sure Mathias is gonna be okay with that?”

He felt a cheeky grin come in, relieved that you stuck with what you once told him, and more. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after all.

“He’ll live. And plus, I need to see Amy and Bob too,” You hummed, pulling back to give him a reassuring smile. “It’ll be like I never left.”

He and Amy helped you pack all your other stuff, such as clothes, toiletries, and other personal items you accumulated over the years.

Interestingly, you three had similar tastes in random knick-knacks despite being very different people--not that any of you would’ve had trouble telling who owned what. But from now on, there would only be two goldfish in the tank, not three, as you turned a new chapter.

Once everything was loaded in the car, you three gathered on the street for one final farewell. You and Amy came together for the biggest hug while Allen stood on the side with Bob in his arms.

Mathias had agreed to wait back at his apartment to let you all have some privacy, which was a welcome gesture on his part.

“I’m seriously gonna miss you guys.” You gushed.

“I’m gonna miss you more,” Amy closed her eyes as she poured everything into the embrace. “You’d better be still coming over on Sundays to watch the game. And Fridays to play baseball with us.”

“That’s a promise,” You hummed. It wasn’t every day that you could hug her like this, so you let her pull away first. And it wasn’t until a few minutes later that she did--truth be told, she was taking it badly, but she wouldn’t be caught dead crying about it in front of you.

So as much as she wanted to, she played it off with a grin.

When she found it in her to smile again, she released you from the embrace; she didn’t want to make this any harder than it already was.

“And here I thought you didn’t like football.” You smiled weirdly.

“Eh, I don’t. I just like the vibes.” She waved you off.

“Right,” You chuckled, reaching over to give her shoulder a pat. “Listen, if you ever need anything, don’t hesitate to call, alright?”

“I’ll try not to,” Amy laughed softly, knowing damn well how difficult it would be to look after Bob without you. But her brother was holding him right now, bouncing him in his arms to let her have this moment. “I think it’s time I pass that mantle onto Mr. Forgot-The-Baby, here.”

“Listen, I’m sorry. But it’s never gonna happen again. I swear.” Allen closed his eyes for a wince. “I’m not that person anymore, alright?”

His reaction was so immediate and genuine, she knew he meant it this time. But she still had to drive the nail in with this warning.

“It better not, or you’ll be getting more jail time than you ever have before. I’m serious.” She raised her brows for a stern look.

“Okay, damn!” He raised his tone. “You didn’t have to go there.”

“You know I had to.” She hummed.

After saying your goodbyes to Bob, Allen handed him back to Amy.

“You’re being surprisingly calm about this. I thought you’d be crying by now,” She commented, bouncing the baby with one arm.

“Eh, I cried enough yesterday,” He murmured, looking to the side.

“Hey,” She punched him gently. “I’m proud of you.”

Allen had insisted that he drive you over to Mathias’s to help bring your stuff inside. But even after everything was unpacked, he didn’t look like he was in a rush to leave--he even sat down at the dining table with a cup of tea, leaned back, and took a long, tantalizing sip.

Your boyfriend’s place was nice, alright.

He couldn’t have expected anything less from a guy who came from a country that invented IKEA. Or was it Norway? Whatever it was, he wasn’t exactly staying for the decorative towels or potted plants.

“So, what, you guys gonna bone right after I leave?” Allen dropped the bomb so casually, and with such an unexpressive, albeit slightly displeased face, you didn’t process what he said until seconds later.

“Allen!” You shot him a flustered look.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” He put the cup down and slapped both hands on his thighs. “You know, that’s fine and everything, but how about we hang out for a bit? I don’t really have any places to be right now.”

“I think we’ll just see you on Friday, Al.” You laughed nervously, pulling him up from his chair so you could push him toward the door.

“Wow, so I was right. ‘Cus you’re totally kicking me out.” His feet skidded against the ground as he inched closer to the hall outside.

“Don’t dwell on it!” You exclaimed, heating up even more.

“I can’t help it, okay?” Allen defended.

Mathias sat wordlessly at the dining table throughout the whole exchange, watching you send him off. If it weren’t for the riveting question his guest brought up, this scene would’ve been pretty funny. But now that they mentioned it, it was all he could think about.

And now that he had you alone, it was the perfect time to strike.

Just as you shut the door, he got up and sauntered over.

He was pink in the face, and his heart was already pounding, excited by all the things he could do to you in an apartment all to yourselves.

Little did he know, you had the exact same idea.

“Were we not having sex once he left?” Mathias asked expectantly, wrapping his arms loosely around your body. When he towered over you like this with his hulking frame, there was no escaping what came next--a hot and hard pounding that left you wet and shaking.

But you weren’t fighting it this time.

You made your answer explicit without a word, gazing up at him with the most coy eyes he’d ever seen. Your lips curled up in such an alluring smile, it made him stupid.

You wanted him just as much as he wanted you, and to see it written all over your face was so rousing, he got hard right then and there. His mouth fell agape in awe, so turned on that he couldn’t believe himself.

You were about to tear into him, and he was more than willing to submit himself to a death of passion. It wasn’t often that you reciprocated his desire with the same intensity, but when you did, your dynamics with him completely flipped for something insanely erotic.

That was when you pushed him backward toward the couch.

He stumbled back, unprepared to face your vigor. His eyes went wide as he laughed nervously. He even started blushing like a schoolboy, as if he wasn’t the one always holding you down and dominating in the bedroom. But this was a side of you he wasn’t used to at all.

You were taking back control, and it couldn’t be any hotter.

After all, when Mathias said he’d do better, he meant it.

Ever since he woke up, he listened more and let you have your way more often than not. Arguments ended before they even started, with him nodding away and going along with everything you said.

He became as obedient as a dog, always at your beck and call for anything you needed. For him to be more generous, considerate, and selfless than he’d ever been--it made you even crazier about him than you already were, which was a feat in and of itself.

The first thing you and Mathias did upon moving in together was have sex. It was painfully on-brand, but what could you say?

The hot, explosive release was much needed. After all the tension and grief that built up over a year, he finally had you all to himself, and you gave yourself to him in a way without compromising your own needs.

You rode him to oblivion on the couch, rocking back and forth on his cock like a rocking horse. After that, you would bounce furiously on him, making sure to sink down all the way with every thrust.

And it felt so good, it looked like he was in pain.

His head tipped back as he moaned non-stop, brows furrowed and eyes screwed shut. Mathias swore he was about to cry from the intensity of it all, and he did, tearing up as he got fucked mercilessly on the couch. If he had known you had it in you to make love to him like this, he would’ve listened to you right from the get-go.

But of course, he just had to find out the hard way.

Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, yeah, yeah, yeah Can I just stay here? Spend the rest of my days here?

Allen started working with Mathias at his boxing gym. Amy also took on fewer shifts and got some of the freedom she’d always wanted.

And now that you were living with your boyfriend, you could think about things other than making rent. That opened the door to endless opportunities, but for now, your priority remained with making up for all the time lost with him. Seeing him every day, because you knew what it was like to think he was gone forever.

But even though Mathias said he gave up boxing, he’d always look at a pair of boxing gloves like he had the world at the tip of his fingers.

After work when nobody was around, he’d slip them on and have a go at the speed bag. He rolled his fists against it, getting it to bounce back and forth rhythmically. A sheen of sweat glazed over his skin from head to toe, and his breath grew heavier the longer he kept it up, but he never faltered. That was when he swung into the speed bag one last time, the explosive impact making it rock to and fro.

He was slowly getting back into the zone.

And maybe one day, he could rise again.

‘Cause you make me feel like I’ve been locked out of heaven For too long, for too long

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