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oathkeeper-of-tarth · 1 year ago

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Isobel, Before

On something of a whim I decided to compile, in chronological order, the flashback segments from Isobel's POV that are woven throughout Moon-chosen, Moon-guided. I was curious how they'd read, and it turns out I quite like how they do - so here they are posted as a standalone little prequelish thing, a series of windows into a developing relationship and some family drama. This includes the segment I wrote for the upcoming third chapter, so consider it a sneak peek of an update that will take me a little while longer because it decided to develop a plot or some such nonsense, you know how it is. The years are my own very rough guesses, trying to somehow work around the Spellplague while keeping it all approximately a century before the main plot of the game, so don't take them too seriously.

Fandom: Baldur’s Gate 3 Characters: Dame Aylin/Isobel Thorm, Ketheric Thorm Length: ~8000 words Rating: M, for canon-typical violence (including temporary character death) and sexual content

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1381 DR

It is an unusually warm and bright summer day for Reithwin, the relentless sun urging you to rush your errands around town and make your way home to the merciful shade. And it is upon your return there that you find the glorious Dame Aylin laying waste to an army of training dummies in the otherwise empty practice field beneath Moonrise Towers.

You steal a moment to watch and appreciate the spectacle that is her entire being in perfectly orchestrated motion, uncharacteristically free of her ever-polished armour, sleeves rolled up - a vision of ferocity, even if it is against such laughably unworthy foes.

It calls to your mind, amusingly, the poor announcer in your father's audience chamber a little over a month ago, so very unusually formal and far too visibly nervous, struggling to rattle off one too many titles.

The Valiant Dame Aylin Silverblood, Undefeated Sword of the Moonmaiden, Paladin and Daughter of Selûne. Arriving as formal Emissary of Our Lady of Silver, speaking in Her name.

She turns when she hears you clearing your throat to announce your presence, an indulgent while after your arrival. Ever so slightly out of breath, with a subtle sheen of sweat on her radiant brow, she inclines her head with respect. "Ah! Lady Isobel. I was just thinking of sending to fetch you. A request, if you please."

"Of course, Dame Aylin." Anything for the resplendent emissary, you want to add, only half-teasingly. It is frustratingly difficult not to act a smitten fool around her, and sarcasm has proved a feeble defence from her charms.

Her request, however, is nowhere near anything you might have anticipated.

"I would have you meet me in the sparring ring, if you are willing."

You blink. "I-- pardon?"

"You are no mere lord's daughter, nor are you simply the demure local healer. I can tell by your bearing you have training. Not the typical mace of the clergy, no," she hums, as if in thought, looking you up and down quite brazenly, appraisingly. "The rapier, perhaps, along with a dagger for the offhand? No, rather, the quarterstaff--"

"The spear," you cut her off. And the lofty, approving tilt of her chin is so fetching as to be insufferable. "I can protect myself, you're right. My father is an accomplished general, after all," and stiflingly overprotective to boot, but that part you bite back and keep to yourself. "It is only fitting. Besides, any devotee of Our Lady knows how important it is to be able to fend for oneself."

"Show me, then, general's daughter," she gestures to the packed-dirt training ring with a grin. "I grow quite bored of this straw-filled wicker regiment I have been pitted against."

She's got a good head and a half of height on you. Her reach outclasses yours quite overwhelmingly. She is visibly broad and strong and unshakeable as a mighty fortress. And though you do indeed have training, the martial arts were hardly your main focus - very much unlike her.

A challenge, truly, but one you cannot help but suddenly crave.

"Fine, then, I accept." A giddiness washes over you as you speak, and your head feels oddly light. The heat and humidity of the day, surely. Treading dangerous ground, Isobel.

Aylin immediately goes over to the training weapon racks to put away the blunt sword she has been using, and you follow her.

"I have trained in arms of all sorts, but I find I most favour the greatsword," she muses as she rummages, retrieving two wooden staves with padded ends, testing their weight. "The spear I must confess I have neglected somewhat, in recent times."

You smirk as she hands you a staff that has evidently passed inspection. "There is no need for excuses, Dame Aylin. When I trounce you, I assure you it will have been fair and square and well deserved."

You expect the hearty bellow of her laugh, some lively banter in return, an exclamation, Ho! Instead, she inclines her head in a respectful gesture, and does so with a surprisingly soft smile and oddly inscrutable gaze in your direction. "I would expect no less of you, my lady."

You look away hastily, wipe the sweat from your hands and put on the leather gloves from your belt. The day has been far too hot for them and the afternoon sun is still beating down fiercely, but you are not about to embarrass yourself and risk losing on the technicality of a splinter.

Then, you face each other.

Her stance and the way she holds the wooden training weapon speak of years, decades… centuries of experience, perhaps. It is hard to truly imagine, and you find you do not really know. Immortal, yes, but… well, since when? Does she have a universe of deeds and escapades on you, a hundred lives lived to the fullest, or merely the knowledge that they lie ahead of her?

When could it possibly be polite to ask such a thing?

You shake away the distraction of your thoughts, just in time to block a quick, testing blow aimed at your own weapon. A tease, really, hoping for a reaction you know well enough not to provide.

She continues with the probing attacks, none of them with any real force behind them, and you think how under normal circumstances it might be a good strategy to let your opponent waste her strength and tire herself out like this - but you know better. You have discreetly observed enough of her training sessions to know that if she is anything at all she is tireless.

But she is leaving it up to you to attempt anything other than these light provocations. So you do - you would hate to disappoint, after all.

You strike out high at her head, once, twice, then at her front leg, swift as a viper, and when she moves her weapon down to parry, you jab at her shoulder and step back in time to avoid the afterblow.

"Oh-ho! An excellent feint, perfectly executed!" The joy that lights her face even as she rolls the struck shoulder is so infectious, you can't help but laugh breathlessly, warmed by this small triumph. "I was indeed correct in my assumption - the most noble Lady Isobel is not to be underestimated. Her skills and merit extend far beyond even the lofty requirements of her duties - be they of the court or of the faith."

The next strike you attempt, flushed with both the heat of the day and the effusive praise, is met with far more resistance, and soon you are exchanging blows with vigour. She repays your shoulder blow with a tap to your hip, then tries to strike the staff from your hands in a disarm you just barely avoid with a well-timed tilt.

Your next attempt at a feint is parried at the very last moment, but you do not retreat, and so you end in a bind. She is much stronger than you, yes, but your angle is superior, and you can see her straining to stay in position, close to that ever-important centreline, and keep her balance. A bead of sweat trails down her neck to her collarbone, and it takes you a moment to realise you are following it, rapt. It takes you another moment to register she is staring at you just as raptly, even as you feel your hair sticking to your temples and realise the paint around your eyes is likely a smudged mess.

Distraction. An opening if you've ever seen one.

"Do you know, when I heard an emissary of Selûne was coming to our town, I did not expect her to have a bard's silver tongue on her." Instead of moving to disengage and putting distance between you, you draw even closer to her, until your mouth is almost at her ear. "In more ways than one, perhaps?"

Her eyes are wide and her cheeks are flushed silver, shining. It is the oddest and most captivating blush you have ever seen, made only more so by the closeness of your study.

And of course, the moment of distraction proves sufficient for that slight shift you needed. The great oak topples with so little effort - leverage, always, the key. Her reaction is faster than you anticipated, however, and so with the force of her riposte you go down right after her. Foolish of you, really - the thought has time to rush through your mind as your sense of balance disappears - to underestimate an accomplished paladin so.

In any case, within moments, Aylin is on the ground, and you land atop her. You have enough presence of mind, somehow, despite the proximity and the warmth and the, well-- to reach for where your weapon started to roll away and press the end of it lightly against her neck. "Yield?"

She raises her hands, palms up in surrender, and nods, struck speechless for once.

You scramble rather gracelessly to your feet in all your triumph, and offer her a hand up. She accepts, then somewhat disappointingly lets go to dust herself off before you've had a chance to fully appreciate the feel of her hand in yours.

"Well!" Aylin turns the bright glint of her full attention on you, charmingly tousled still. "I see no point in struggling to prolong a losing battle. A challenge, skillfully won." She steps closer to you and inclines her head in a slight bow. "Besides, I can tell my yielding on the field of battle pleases you, and I am not one to deny a lady her pleasure."

All of it spoken with a smile, and a shockingly honest, unmasked, open, and entirely unabashed look in her eyes. Damn her.

You do your best, feebly, to catch your breath and return to something resembling calm propriety. And you fail to squash a niggling doubt. "Thank you for the bout, Dame Aylin. But… honestly now, were you holding back?"

"Only as much as is appropriate for the training ring, of course. One is never to exert one's full might in these circumstances, as you well know." She shakes her head, a small frown furrowing her brow, and you can't help but feel this is a recitation she has been made to repeat until it stuck, something she had to deliberately become aware of after getting carried away one too many times. A thought to file away for later, perhaps. "But not in the sense you doubtlessly meant, no. I would not pretend and deceive after asking a fair duel of you. Such things are beneath Dame Aylin."

The heat floods your cheeks again. Damn her phrasing.

"Ah," she clears her throat. "The day has grown too hot for martial pursuits, I fear - let us retire."

She offers you her arm, ever gallant. You allow yourself the bold indiscretion of taking it only after you have peeled off your gloves and tucked them back in your belt. You've not known Dame Aylin for a very long time, but you are well aware she is possibly the least subtle creature in all of Faerûn. The ill-concealed catch in her breath and stiffening in her shoulders as your skin meets hers is a treasured token you stow away for further contemplation.

It is a regrettably short walk to the pleasantly shaded entrance hall of Moonrise.

1382 DR

Sharran forces dare attack even here, in the shadow of your father's moonlit fortress, in the very heart of a famously devoted Selûnite region. Perhaps they heard, or tortured out of some poor soul, that their hated Moonwitch had sent an emissary.

But the emissary does not seem to be quite what they expected or prepared for.

You've heard of Dame Aylin's exploits, of some of the many glorious deeds to her name - well, to be quite honest, you've deliberately asked around for them and chased down all the tales, however ridiculous they seemed, with somewhat concerning single-mindedness. But none of them, not even the most outrageous exaggerations with all the force of poetic licence behind them, can compare to actually seeing her in the heat of battle.

It is certainly dangerous to be so distracted in the midst of a clearly planned and organised assault on your home, and it is especially egregious to keep looking up, chasing a vision as it flies somewhere high above all of you, soaring over the head of your father's statue gracing the centre of the embattled town square. But she is so utterly glorious and radiant and filled with unquestionable purpose in all that she does, and you are utterly beyond help.

"Selûne, Moonmother, in Your name!" The clear voice suddenly rings out from somewhere close by, drowning out the din of battle in your ears. You turn just in time to see a flash of silver light engulf one of the masked attackers, burnished black disks brazenly displayed on their armour, and, well, you are not the only one smitten.

But then - disaster. Three of Moonrise's most recently recruited silver-bedecked guards find themselves stumbling into a group of enemies that close a circle around them. You see one of them fall, gripped by inky-purple strands, before you can even start to intone a spell; another one loses his footing and opens himself up for a deadly blow.

Quick as lightning, Aylin rushes down and forward, pushing the stumbling guard fully out of the way. Instead of him, the cultist's scimitar finds purchase in her gut, sliding through a gap between armour-plates like butter, and another's obsidian-black axe bites into her shoulder.

The sound it makes, that Aylin makes, draws a shout from you. A bolt of moonlight dispatches the first cultist, rage and terror somehow making your aim uncanny, and you step forward to bathe the rest of his nearby comrades in deadly, burning radiance before he has even hit the ground.

After this, the battle is over as quickly as it had begun. The last of the attackers falls on her own blade rather than be captured and questioned, crying out some pitiful, ill-conceived mantra about secrets.

You find you do not care: your world, for the moment, has sunk down to the breadth of one woman lying on the trampled ground in a distressingly rapidly growing pool of silver, the guards she saved hovering around her in a mix of awe and alarm.

They let you through without hesitation - you are a cleric, after all. A healer. But as you drop to your knees at her side and attempt to assess the damage, you can tell you are too late.

Your hands fly in well-practised movements all the same.

"Do not worry, fearsome, fair Isobel," Aylin manages, breathily, barely audible, around a mouthful of blood. Her hand makes a very weak attempt at a dismissive wave, or grabbing your wrist to stop your ministrations, you cannot quite tell. Her helmet and her wings are both already gone, and the silver burning in her gaze just moments ago is a weak flicker. "I--"

Her eyes flutter closed and she falls limp beneath your hands and you--

--do not have time to even begin to comprehend what has happened before she is gasping awake again, coughing and groaning, spitting up a clot, trying to sit up.

You gape for a moment, then help her in her efforts, lean her against your chest. The weight of the armour feels like it might crush you, but moving away feels unthinkable.

"No tears, no," she mumbles, half-coherently, as you strain to understand, as a gauntleted hand reaches up to brush against your cheek clumsily. "So mundane a blow cannot… truly fell… Dame Aylin."

It is one thing to be aware of it in theory. Another thing entirely to witness it. Immortal.

There is a crowd gathered around you by now, you register faintly. People crying out prayers of praise and thanks to the Moonmaiden, for Her infinite wisdom and Her endless gifts and the indomitable daughter-champion She has blessed you all with. You feel a tug in your chest, like you should be joining in; like you would be the one leading the prayer in ordinary circumstances.

But you feel terribly far away from it all even as Aylin's breath grows more steady as she leans against you. You see her smile, still bloody, and understand only the most general sense of the reassuring platitudes she is whispering at you.

You bring her to the House of Healing with the other wounded of the battle and insist rather possessively on treating her yourself. Only afterwards do you tear yourself away from her bedside to take full stock of damage and casualties while she sleeps it off.

Your father rushes to embrace you tightly as soon as he catches sight of you from the House's grand entrance, and you let yourself cling to him for a moment. You do your best to assuage his worries, claim - lie - that you were in no real danger, insist on continuing to help here where you are most needed as he returns to his gubernatorial duties. And somehow, miraculously, he lets you go.

As you help the dutiful sisters with the worst of it, you finally manage to focus on murmuring your own prayer of thanks. It helps clear the long-clinging fog from your mind. And it helps, truly, that you count no deaths among Reithwin's faithful - the only fallen today are Shar's to claim if she deigns to do so.

Well - and then there's Aylin.

You go to check on her in the morning, after you've managed - been forced into, rather - a very brief nap.

The glorious and apparently unconquerable Dame Aylin is awake, reclining against the headboard of the only occupied bed in that wing. You don't recall requesting she receive any special treatment, and she doesn't look too pleased with being singled out as if in a place of honour - in fact, she mostly looks bored. She is frowning down at herself, plucking at loose threads hanging off of the bandages that cover most of her shoulder, chest, and abdomen - your own handiwork.

You step into the room and set down the basin of fresh water and an assortment of healing supplies with a deliberately loud clatter, jarring her out of her reverie. The moment she sees you, an expression of blatant joy dawns on her face. You try very hard not to read too much into it.

Instead, you make very standard proper-bedside-manner-dictated small talk as you peel away the gauze. The wounds are mostly healed, as you would expect from your application of any and all magic you had remaining that night, but there is a small line of gold running down towards her left side, where the blade bit in and through, and another one cupping across her shoulder. Oddly beautiful for what is presumably a scar - and highlighting the marvellous build of a finely muscled torso, pipes up a segment of your mind that has no place around a sickbed.

You wrench yourself back into professionalism and lightly press down with your fingers, following the shining gold, the freshly knit-together skin, still reddened and bruised in places. "Do you feel any pain when I do this?"

"None at all," Aylin answers resolutely, entirely back to her old self. But then- "Ah," she winces as you find a particularly sore spot, expression wry, "it would appear I spoke too soon."

You trace back up, murmuring incantations, letting the cool, healing relief flow from your fingertips.

The way she is unphased by all of this seems… uncanny. In fact, she shows more concern for you, completely untouched by the battle, than for herself. It is oddly and slightly frighteningly flattering, in retrospect, that she used her dying breath - well, this particular dying breath - to reassure you.

And it all makes much more sense now, as things slot into place. The recklessness of her fighting style, of her whole manner. The way she shrugged off blows and rushed ever forward, where the battle was thickest and fiercest.

But now you've seen she is immortal, yes, but not invulnerable, however much she might like to act like she is both. And if she pulls herself out from literal death, no matter the scope of the wounds, she does not seem to magically heal much past that - the evidence is before you now. You can already picture her merely patching herself up with her own healing magic in the middle of the fray, as if in passing, just enough to enable her to storm on. All while her enemies gape and turn tail when they realise the futility of standing against her.

"I only hope you did not worry overmuch, Lady Isobel. It is in my nature, inextricable from my being. I cannot fall, not truly. But I keep the reminders, sometimes - wrought in gold."

Then she very cordially points out a few more, as if to indulge you. Some bigger, some smaller, some thin lines, barely there, some wide and jagged. But all of them bright gold seams, seamlessly integrated into her skin.

"Why not silver?" You blurt out, then feel your face burn with embarrassment. And then a mild but growing horror as you think back to the silver staining your hands and robes as you knelt on the damp cobblestones. This is in turn chased away by an odd warmth as you recall how she murmured your name and reached for your face.

Aylin, however, guffaws joyfully, stopped short only by a sudden wince as she pulls something still tender.

"Would you believe - I do not know? It is simply how I am, how I have always been. Perhaps I shall ask my Mother to elucidate, when next we commune." Then she beams at you. "What a joy and pleasure you have proven to be, Lady Isobel. To make me consider things about myself I have never had cause nor inclination to before. A rare treasure."

You blame your lack of sleep on the ease with which she is managing to fluster you without even seeming to consciously try, so you do your best to keep your response polite and nothing more. "The pleasure is all mine, I assure you, Dame Aylin. All of Reithwin treasures your presence and is grateful for it, especially after tonight."

She looks up at you and you meet her gaze, pausing in your ministrations. She looks disappointed, if anything, and the disappointment is shared - those are not the words you truly wish to say to her. And you cannot quite explain to yourself why you feel like a sudden distance has sprung up between you, after months of a beautifully built-up rapport, laid on the foundations of those first few shared star-struck gazes. Why this one out of all the many reminders of her divine nature has shaken you so.

As you continue reapplying bandages and keep distractedly checking in with her about the tightness, she catches your hand and presses a kiss to your knuckles. "My wounds are a distant memory, for they are being tended by fair Isobel--"

There is a naked determination writ all over her face now. It brings to mind her battlefield bearing, more than anything else, but her eyes are wide and soft and almost pleading.

"Truly, I am in the best of hands." A kiss again, and she lets the hand go. It is a perfectly polite and courteous gesture. Nothing… scandalous. But there is a clear ardour to it you did not acknowledge before. Calling attention to a line you have not yet crossed, but that you have both, perhaps, been toeing for a while.

Then she moves to sit up fully, even through visible winces, and shrugs off the steadying hand you place on her shoulder.

"You are the worst patient I have ever had," you state dramatically, laughing. She merely cocks her head in response, so very winning and charming even when still covered in blood, dirt, and partially unravelled bandages. "I will go get some more fresh water so you can clean up - though we've already ruined these sheets, I fear."

But you do not move, despite your words. Your eyes have not left hers in what seems like hours, but can't have been more than a minute. There is a blatant yearning there that you know is reflected in your gaze, that you have both become utterly incapable of hiding.

"I would ask, greedily, another boon of my most gracious healer," she murmurs.

"Oh?" You lean closer, ostensibly to hear her quiet words better. "Why, Dame Aylin, after your valiant performance tonight, I might just grant it."

You are almost nose to nose when Aylin speaks up again, her throat visibly working, her entire impressive self working up the courage to leap the distance - and you find you very much want her to.

"A kiss, then. To drink but once from the lips of the incomparable Lady Isobel Thorm would soothe all that ails me, seal all my wounds."

You watched this woman take an axe to the shoulder and a sword through the belly, and only now does she sound hesitant. Nervous. Afraid, even. The smallest of trembles in that rich, regal voice.

"If… if I have misread, if I have misinterpreted your intentions, I beg your forgiveness with all possible contrition…"

Your reply is wordless as you surge forward, boon happily granted. The first of many to come.

1383 DR

The dinner is only slightly awkward, as far as these affairs have gone in the past. The most notable thing about it is that your father, it seems, has learned from last time.

First of all, Balthazar isn't here - wasn't invited, or had to beg off due to some undoubtedly important business. What your father sees in that man and why he holds his advice in such high esteem is quite beyond you. It is an amusing thought, however, that he, too, might have suffered from the horrible awkwardness and simply invented an excuse for this occasion.

Second - oh, Lady Arianella Bormul had been lovely, the very picture of elegance and rather breathtaking grace. With a crown of curls you felt a stab of envy over, and a perfectly cut gown that accentuated every curve of her and every dark blush shade of her skin. Carrying herself like a queen in the dining room, but perfectly polite and amicable in the conversations you two were inevitably forced into afterwards, with intriguing flashes of a cutting wit. But you shared so very little. And she was beautiful like a work of art whose objective qualities everyone agreed upon, you included, but that just were not to your personal taste.

Now you wonder just how obvious you'd made it.

As your father shoots you pointed glances from across the table and over a deliberately placed carafe of wine, you allow yourself, briefly, an entire slew of unkind thoughts. About how maybe things would be different if your mother were still here. About how much easier it would be if you had siblings, so that the entire future of Reithwin and the Thorm family and your father's heart didn't rest on your shoulders. About how selfish you truly would like to be.

Then you shove it all back down and smile at the guests around the table, and offer your opinion about the most excellent skills of your local mason's guild and their potential for expansion.

The young Lady Jana Whitburn is strategically sat right across from you, as her father and yours conduct the important conversations on venison and marble and slate trade that this visit was ostensibly arranged for. She is tall and broad and clad in a marvellously fetching brocade suit of dark green. Her mother, rather obviously focused on you since their arrival in what is clearly a tactical division of duties agreed upon in advance, talks about Jana's successes in the tournament arenas across the Coast and her pending performance in Waterdeep's Field of Triumph. She herself, in a pleasantly deep yet melodic voice, mentions being interested in jousting, as a means of keeping her riding skills sharp while she is not out and about keeping her family's lands safe. Tilts her head at you with a winning smile at the conclusion of one adventurous story or other, the sharp cut of her chiselled jaw accentuated in perfect candlelight. You smile back, and poke half-heartedly at your tasteless dessert.

Later, you take her for a walk in Reithwin's small but well-kept gardens. She very gallantly offers you her arm, and you take it. Your father and her parents beam, and you contain your sigh. But when you look up at your companion, you are slightly surprised to notice that there is something brewing behind her eyes as well.

As soon as you are out of eyesight and earshot, you stop, take your hand off her arm and turn to face her.

"My apologies, Lady Whitburn…"

She almost winces when you address her, and shakes her head as if she is trying to physically shake off the formality and the trailing remnants of the dinner atmosphere. "Jana, please, Lady Thorm."

"Jana, then," you smile your most agreeable smile, "and so I must be Isobel, no?"

"Of course, Isobel," she smiles back, but it is clearly strained, and you feel nothing so much as pity.

"Listen, Jana, I…" You hesitate, struggling to put your words into polite, inoffensive shape.

All this does is highlight the lack of Aylin, the lack of the connection and utterly natural understanding between the two of you. The ease. Even when there was supposed to be some fundamental and unbridgeable rift between you, according to your father.

"I'm afraid my father has misled you and your family - not out of any desire to harm, nor with ill intent. But, you see, I… I already have a lovely woman courting me. Well, rather further along than mere courting, I would say…"

To your surprise, Jana bursts into laughter, light and clear, and you are spared the embarrassment of elaborating further.

"Isobel, you cannot believe what a relief that is for me to hear."

You pause, a bit taken aback by the enthusiasm of her response. "Oh?"

"I'm afraid I count myself taken as well. Now, make no mistake, you are perfectly charming, and a delight in conversation. But," she waves a dismissive hand, "the heart wants what it wants and all that."

"That it does," you agree, and this time your smile is genuine. A tension you had gotten so used to seems to melt away from your shoulders, and the two of you resume your stroll among the gardener's latest offerings. "My father, well… he's a shrewd man. You and my Aylin would get along splendidly, I think. You seem very much alike in many ways."

"As would you and my Iona. She is training to be a cleric too, an acolyte of Ilmater. I swear, the realms have never seen a more patient and kind creature. Whenever I visit her at the temple I take a moment to observe her finishing her rounds - the way she all but glows with compassion is--" Jana halts both her words and her steps, slightly embarrassed, as if she has only now caught herself in her charmingly lovestruck enthusing. "Ah, but I've gone off on a tangent, haven't I?"

You cannot help but smile at the sight of someone so utterly, beautifully enamoured. It is, after all, a feeling you happily know all too well.

"Please," you gesture at a bench behind some conveniently tall rose bushes - one of your favourite spots. "Don't stop on my account. Though, of course, now I can't help but wonder… what is your family's objection to the match? If you don't mind me asking," you add hastily.

Jana gives a wry smile as she takes a seat. "My parents would prefer someone of much higher birth for me."

"I think mine would prefer I set my sights lower," you chuckle ruefully.

Jana's interest seems to be piqued. "Is that so? I've heard some… rumours, since our arrival. I've been wondering about, well, what kernel of truth spawned them."

"Have you, now?" You arch an eyebrow, allow a bit of bite into your tone. "You've barely been here a day - I wouldn't have taken you for a gossipmonger."

"You'll have to forgive my natural curiosity," her grin is as easily charming as it was during the dinner, but now, in the unexpectedly pleasant atmosphere of friendly understanding, you allow yourself to fully appreciate it, and to grin back. "But you must admit it's a bit unusual, Isobel. A celestial paramour… I suppose your father wants you to look lower than the very moon in the sky?"

Her dramatic gesture in the general direction of said moon earns her a giggle, which she seems to take as encouragement.

"Is it true she single-handedly took on a score of Nightcloaks and won?"

You think back over the many rousing tales of victory Aylin has shared with you, and when nothing rings a bell you realise she must be talking about the raid last summer.

"You mean here, when the Sharrans dared to attack Reithwin?" It's hard to contain your amusement at her eager nod. "Well, it wasn't exactly single-handed and there were no Nightcloaks among the Sharran forces, but I can confirm she was certainly impressive."

You decide to leave out the part about Aylin dying and coming back right before your eyes. It is something you've yet to discuss with her, more than a full year later. Something you've no idea how to bring up, and something that inspires in you feelings you cannot quite define.

Something you know you will have to confront, one day.

For now, you sit on a secluded bench and shirk familial duties with a fellow highborn daughter. The two of you trade stories for the rest of the evening, and by the end of it you feel like you've known both Jana Whitburn and Iona Bluewater for years, and find yourself rather invested in the future of their relationship. In turn, you hope to have painted a picture of an Isobel who is more than just General Thorm's daughter, and of an Aylin who is something besides her divine silver bloodline.

You part amicably when the time comes, even promise to write to one another. Later on, the leave-takings complete, both of you having played your respective parts well enough to buy yourselves some very brief reprieve, you go to retreat to your room. Every stair you climb still seems to drop your heart that much deeper into a listless moroseness.

The air in your room is heavy and stale after the garden's freshness, so you decide to take your brooding out to your balcony. You may have won a friend today, but your father will be in a dour mood when he finds out his attempt has once again fallen through. And then how long until he plans another? Or turns to something else? No, this was simply untenable--

A gleaming Aylin alights on the balcony and pulls you into an embrace in a single, elegant movement, and it is like the Moon rising to dispel the dark of a cloudy night.

The first thing you notice as you are subjected to one kiss after another is that your beloved seems to be of a rather amorous disposition. You still wear your jewels and your finest silver-blue gown, the picture-perfect lady. But with the way Aylin's hands are wandering you sense this might not be the case for very long.

You place a hand on her chest, the metal pleasantly cool against your palm, and she stops, looking at you both questioningly and with blatant yearning.

Which should be ridiculous. You were barely apart for a day! You've gone longer without seeing each other when Aylin flew away on some divinely ordained quest or mission or another. But the feelings you read on her face are a perfect reflection of your own, and you are sick of the very thought of denying them. Instead, you throw your arms around her and draw her close once more.

"I missed you," you murmur the truth into her neck, just above the edge of her gorget, into that bit of unearthly pale skin that is always so conveniently available for you to kiss.

"I have dutifully stayed away, exactly as you bade me to," Aylin doesn't sound too disgruntled, and for that you find yourself both grateful and relieved. "But your guests are gone at long last, and so I consider my duty done."

You suppress a scowl at the bitterness that rises in you - because yes, you did pull Aylin aside and request, against the palpable wishes of every fibre of your being, that she not show herself around Moonrise today. All in the ultimately futile pursuit of appeasing your father, in a way so shallow and childish and stupidly obviously temporary that you feel a flare of anger - disgust, even - at yourself for not standing your ground. For going along with it all in the first place. But the slight yet audible disdain Aylin puts on the word guests is too conspicuous, too intriguing, and so your curiosity trumps your rising guilt.

"Do you have something against the Whitburn family?" Surely, if there was something objectionable about them, your father wouldn't have invited them the way he did. Aylin would have warned you of anything sinister. But then, suddenly, a different, more darkly amusing flavour of thought arises. "Or do you merely not like Lady Jana Whitburn?"

Aylin huffs, tilts her head with an unconvincing nonchalance. "She seems a fine woman. A knight with several deeds to her name - in particular some courageous outings against a local Cyricist offshoot, very recently. I hear she conducted herself with utmost skill and bravery."

"You've looked into her, I see?" You ask teasingly. Aylin's frown alone is an entire hundred-page novel. "Aylin. Are you jealous?"

The tinge of possessiveness in the way she holds you against her chest is clear to you now. You also find you have no complaint to give.

"I cannot help but feel this latest attempted match is… rather shrewdly targeted. Do you not find it so? Why, I would near take it as a slight."

With some reluctance, you pull away the slightest bit in order to face her properly.

"Aylin, look at me," you tilt her chin up, make her meet your eyes, reaching over to smooth the thundercloud away from her brow. "Forget about it, about them. I would have none but you - you know this by now, I hope. Only you."

Forever, you dearly wish you could say, sometimes. Your fingers trace down her cheek and to her lips as you watch her ire pour back into fervour.

"Isobel, I swear, from the moment our eyes met, I--"

You interrupt her with a kiss - she is too striking and too beautiful and too achingly, passionately devoted not to.

The entire situation is a problem to solve, and a mounting one. You can tell by your own rising annoyance and resentment each time the subject comes up that you cannot entertain your father's attempts at denying your relationship for much longer. But you can sense in both your and Aylin's current moods that any discussion will be anything but productive.

You break apart, but stay close enough for you to whisper against her mouth. "Why don't we stop wasting time, and instead of wallowing in misery, you take me to bed."

A different frown creases her brow now as she inclines her head towards the door you left ajar behind you. "Your bed? Here?"

You glance back as well, almost drawn in and through the imposing towers of Moonrise and all it represents.

"Yes," you reply with little hesitation. You decide then and there to be done with this farce. No more flying away to stay at Last Light, or utterly unsubtle attempts at sneaking off, slinking back before dawn only to present yourself downstairs come morning, unacknowledged but fooling nobody. There are other methods in your arsenal besides pointless subterfuge. "And tomorrow - if you wish to join us, of course - I would like to invite you to breakfast. Where you will sit at my side."

Where you belong, you swallow back, keeping your mock-proclamation formal. Where the world should and will acknowledge you belong.

Aylin's smirk reassures you she understands fully how you intend to play this. "How could I decline my lady's invitation?"

You tilt your chin up, the picture of a lady issuing a decree, even as your lips curl into a smile. "Despite any slights, intended or not, and protests from my family, it is an honour to have you here. I will see that it is better demonstrated, as it should have been from the start."

Or perhaps it would be better to say how it was at the start, before Ketheric Thorm's welcome for Selûne's emissary cooled down to an icy, formal tolerance - of course, exactly as your and Aylin's relationship blossomed, decidedly informal, regardless.

Aylin's mouth is hot on your neck as she effortlessly lifts you up and carries you inside. You feel her grin through her kisses. "I think, Isobel, you'll find the honour is all mine. And so is having you. Here or anywhere else."

You cannot help but laugh, taking her face between both your hands and peppering it with kisses in return, always delighted by her utter lack of both subtlety and hesitation.

Once Aylin plants you on the bed and herself between your thighs, your dress lost to some darkened corner and her gauntlets lost to the aether, she leaves little room for thought or speech. Relentless and utterly driven, she refuses to stop until your legs are jelly, your head is void of all concerns, and your heels have all but left dents in her backplate.

Her face both glows and glistens when she rests her cheek against your stomach at long last, alight with some private amusement and sheer pride. You thread your hands through her hair and catch your breath, and for a little while simply bask in her presence.

She stretches out a bit, unfolds her wings just enough to let fluffed-up, ruffled feathers settle back into place, and you sigh at the sight. So magnificent in her devotion, your angel.

Aylin next makes a show of licking at her fingers with a pleased smirk, then her lips for good measure. "I may not have been invited to the evening's festivities, but my darling, ever caring, ever thoughtful, provides bountiful nourishment nonetheless. It is the height of honour, to have such a delight saved for me alone."

You flush and squirm, and would like to state something rather precise and factual about moon cycles and the workings of your mortal body. "Aylin!" You throw an arm over your burning face instead. "Gods, you say such things…"

"But you take such delight in it when I do," she replies, tilting her head faux-innocently.

"I adore it. I adore you. Come here and I'll show you just how much."

This is what prompts her to finally take a moment to dismiss her armour, bringing her next to you in a heartbeat. You take another precious few seconds to marvel at how perfectly she fits into your arms, like she was made to be there, instead of for any divine mission.

You spend the night curled around each other in a too-small bed, both of you choosing to be utterly brazen.

1385 DR

You were very young when your mother died. The searing, half-understood pain of her departure had time to dull into an ache, then into a sense of absence you have grown up with, that will always be yet another part of you. You keep her final letter, and reread it less and less as the years and then decades go by. You can hear and feel her words just as well in the soft, warm moonlight that blankets Reithwin on blessed nights. It makes you feel like you can firmly grasp and hold and understand all that she tried to leave you with.

There is a distinct sense that she is proud of you. That she will see you again one day and tell you so herself. So you smile up at the Moon, the ever-changing treasured constant in your life, and bask in the pale, gentle love you receive in return.

When you lost a mother, Reithwin lost its head cleric. In the years since, it has had only interim duty-bearers. And you understood, years ago, even as you settled into a promising role in the House of Healing, that you were being looked to as the replacement.

And true - this has ever been your calling. You feel you were born for this service, sometimes, so easily does it come to you - the deeply felt devotion, the lightness of moonlight always ready at your fingertips, the sheer awareness of Her presence, of all She gives and provides and strives for. A cause so good and just and right you would barely deign to call it a choice - though a choice it is, always, freely made by you, again and again and again.

So when you reject the notion of taking up office at Reithwin - at least for the foreseeable future - and announce your plan for undertaking several pilgrimages of increasing length and complexity, it causes a stir among the clergy and a dark thundercloud to settle upon your father's brow.

The further away the locations you list as you stand before him in his study, oddly formal, the deeper his frown becomes. By the time you mention leaving Waterdeep and the House of the Moon and the settlements on the way to Neverwinter, he raises a hand to cut you off.

"I do not think this is wise, Isobel. There is need of you here. The roads are perilous--"

"I can take care of myself. You know I can, papa - you've seen to that. I have trained and prepared for this all my life." Then you smile, hopeful, and make your biggest misstep. "Besides, Aylin will be there to protect me, should the need arise--"

"Of course she will," you catch the mutter under his breath and your mouth slams shut.

You take a deep, steadying breath, and reach across the desk to lay a gentle, reassuring hand on your father's, meeting and holding his heavy gaze. "Reithwin is my home. No matter where the road takes me, no matter how far, I'll always come back. And to you as well, papa."

Reithwin, ancestral seat of your family, safe and idyllic, surely does not need you as much as the wide world; the vast, colourful, challenging variety of the realms. There is so much you can do, and offer. What good are gifts if you are not going to use them? Hoarding them, hiding away, sheltered - no, you refuse to be a waste.

"I need you here, Isobel."

There is an edge of desperation to your father's voice that makes your breath catch and your eyes burn. A pain that calls to mind, oddly, the sting of the black ink being slowly applied around your lids, a needle shaping the curl of the holy symbol down towards your cheekbones.

And there it is, perhaps - the real root of the struggle at hand.

"I can't be your little girl forever," you exhale, frustration mounting, somewhat undercut when you see the naked hurt on his face. "I can't be just that," you amend. "I have an entire life to live. My own life."

"With Aylin," he suggests darkly. Disapprovingly. "And when she carelessly discards you, a mayfly in her eyes--"

"Is that what this is truly about, again? Father," not quite papa at the moment, no, as you try so very hard to keep your calm in the face of your own rising irritation, "must we?"

"How can I not, Isobel? When she has clearly been feeding you this - this drivel."

"It has nothing to do with her!"

The doubt is writ plainly all over his face, and you bristle. Fine. If he is not ready to relinquish his chokehold over Isobel Thorm, cherished daughter, then he will have to reckon with Isobel, accomplished cleric of Selûne, and prospective Silver Lady initiate. You let go of his hand and step back, square your shoulders demonstratively, stand up ramrod straight.

"Our Lady champions and rewards self-sufficiency, agency, travel, and discovery - of ourselves, the world around us, and all in it who might need guidance or help in any way. It is mine to freely give, and I intend to do so, wherever I am needed. In Her name."

You turn and leave without waiting for your father to scrounge up a response.

It is the last conversation you have with him for a century.

It happens so very quickly, for something that would rewrite the fate of your home and all you ever loved for the next hundred years. Like a carelessly tossed pebble turning into a rockslide.

An ominous chill that barely has the time to register fully; a bark-whine from Squire, cut short; a searing pain in-- through-- your side and your chest, fading into numbness within moments, so fast that you barely choke out a desperate blood-drowned breath as blackness swarms the edges of your vision; a frantic cry of Isobel! ringing out from somewhere above or below; and then--

nothing

and nothing, and nothing, and nothing.

#baldur's gate 3 #isobel thorm #dame aylin #aylin x isobel #bg3 #fanfiction #my fic #oathkeeper writes things #comments welcome thoughts welcome honestly i just want to rotate these two in my head forever #i want to yell about isobel thorm constantly

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lexicat2410 · 7 months ago

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The Cellar

Spoilers

The Cellar by Natasha Preston is a good suspense book for people who want to start with the genre. I would, however, not recommend it to someone who has been reading the genre before, as it follows pretty basic tropes, making it basic to the experienced reader. It is about a girl called Summer who gets kidnapped by a man named Colin or Clover, depending on which perspective you are in. And gets held somewhere with three other girls (Rose, Poppy, and Violet) and gets renamed Lily. You see the trend It is told through alternating perspectives: Summer, Colin and Lewis (Summer's boyfriend). This book does cover heavy subjects such as kidnapping, rape, abuse, purity culture and murder, if you might be triggered by any of these subjects, perhaps step away from the book and pick up a different one. Keep yourself safe 😊. Don't read this if you like the book or are the author or her friends.

Pros:

1. The story had a promising premise: What would you do if you were locked in a basement with three other girls and expected to do domestic labour for your kidnapper, and would you give up on searching for someone after they had gone missing for a long period

2. The characters were mostly distinct and got their role as a character across to the audience. I liked that they weren't all on the same page and had varying levels of hope due to how long they had been imprisoned. My personal favourite was Poppy due to her attitude that she wouldn't be reckless but still has hopes and dreams of getting out.

3. The plot was engaging and kept me wondering what was going to happen, and it was overall a fun read. This book is good for beginner readers because of this fact. There is not much I can say here.

Cons

1. The rest of the cast, I did not say they were likeable, just that I understood their role in the story I'm just going to go over the people with a POV otherwise, this will go on forever:

Summer: This girl literally did nothing but cry and go in the shower, and she just cried about her boyfriend, not her family, just her boyfriend. This is understandable due to the situation she was put in, but from a story perspective, it got tiring fast, especially after 8 months. She had absolutely no character development at all, and after the experience, she WAS FINE there was little to no mention of PTSD. I do feel mostly sorry for her she just does nothing.

Clover: He had to be the most basic villain I have ever read catered to an age group over 10 I mean, he's a bit cliche. A man obsessed with women's purity because his Father cheated on his mother with a prostitute, so he now kills them so no more families can be ripped apart. I don't know whether we were supposed to feel sorry for him because, frankly, it seems that way I could just be reading it wrongly, and if Preston was trying to do that, she failed.

Lewis: This may be controversial, but the hate I have for this man is more than I have for the villain. I mean, he just seems like the kind of guy who doesn't let you have any guy friends and is the most insufferable human ever I mean, this guy thinks he is better than the police (which he is in this story, but that's due to a bad plot). I mean, he thinks that this guy who is helping with the search yet doesn't seem sorry enough took his girlfriend (which he did, but that is plot convenience) I mean, he broke into this guy's house. It had been 8 months I get that it was your girlfriend, but not everyone has to be devastated about the loss of someone they don't know, and then he has the audacity to when Summer is in the hospital to rush up there and expect her to want to see him straight away she just got kidnapped and raped by someone she should call the shots of who gets to see her. Yet he seemed like he would make her see him if she didn't want him to come due to her trauma with a man over the last 8 MONTHS. Maybe I'm overreacting, but this is my opinion.

2. Plot convenience: By the end of the book, it seemed like Preston did not think of a way to end the book, so she made everything well convenient. Realistically, how would Lewis, a random 18-year-old guy, be able to find Summer when the police couldn't use vibes alone? Now, I get it about the power of love and how desperation makes you do rash things, but it was just a sense that Colin did not feel sad about Summers's kidnapping, he probably met plenty of people in the search party who did not feel sad about her passing how is it only this guy, does he have spidey senses or something cause there is no possible way that would happen in real life. Also, the fact Summer doesn't have any PTSD after what is a traumatic experience is very convenient

Well, that was a rant, wasn't it, I need to read better books. During writing cons, my rating slipped from a five to a three, so this is worse the more you unpack it. Overall, it is a great premise that needed to be executed better, and the characters need some work (a lot in the case of Lewis) I mean no harm to the author I think this was her debut novel on Wattpad, no less, and some of her stories do get better personally I like The Lost which is a similar premise just executed better and the characters are heaps better.

#natasha preston #book review #bookworm #suspense #books #goodreads

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glassgulls · 3 years ago

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Letters to My Love

Fandom: Lord Of The Rings Return of the King

Pairing: Haldir x fem!reader

Warnings: Mutual pining, angst, kissing, awful sugary fluff (I need a happy ending as life is a blackhole of existential dread).

Summary: You leave Lórien after spending time recuperating to visit your friend Eowyn and promise to send word back to your friend Haldir. Though you think of him more than that, does he feel the same though?

Word count: 6040

Comments: More Haldir for the Haldir throne! First longer piece in the LOTR fandom. Hopefully I've kept Haldir relatively in character. Thank you to @heilith for the encouragement and motivation to finish this and post. You're a wonderful inspiration.

Putting your quill down you stare at the ink now drying. Reading it over you frowned in concentration, trying to make sure there was a tone of friendship without any of your clear desire bleeding through. Friendly and precise was the aim as always in your now routine one sided correspondence. It was getting increasingly difficult with each letter though to tow that line especially with who the recipient was.

You look at the envelope already set aside, Marchwarden Haldir in your neatly block printed handwriting followed by the address; it always gives you a small rush even to write his name.

You had left Lórien after promising Eowyn to visit her and her new betrothed and not wanting to outstay your welcome with your Elven hosts you had set off as soon as you were well enough to ride alone. But it had been a bittersweet parting. Of course you had wanted to come and congratulate your friend on her new love but you felt loath to leave the peaceful forest, and your new friends.

Haldir had asked you to send word that you were safe when you had left Lórien, your logical mind telling you that it was out of friendship, but the slight frown as he had softly requested it had made your breathing hitch. It almost seemed for a moment as if he had been nervous to ask. The usual stoic mask he wore as Marchwarden slipped if but for a split second under the morning sun.

*****

"I promise my friend." You had replied after climbing on your horse smiling gently. After all it was the least you could do after being able to rest and recuperate after the battle with Sauron in the beautiful sanctuary of Lórien.

You tried to ignore the traitorous voice in the back of your head whispering that you were a coward and running away.

Gripping the reins tightly till your knuckles went white you swallowed hard. The growing feelings you had developed for the ellon in front of you were pushed down and sitting uncomfortable in your chest waiting to crawl up your throat and crow out to the world.

Haldir had stood by your horse, hand on its neck stroking it softly as he went quiet, the morning breeze stirring his immaculate hair. It had seemed to you he had wanted to say something, his brows drawn into a small frown that you didn’t know when you had started to recognise.

“You must promise me to be safe, the roads are still dangerous,” He had spoken eventually into the horse's neck, fidgeting with a lock of its mane. You had opened your mouth to try to defend your skills but the words choked in your throat, your mouth shut promptly at the way his hand stilled with its incessant action. His head turned suddenly to you and the frown had deepened.

“I do not doubt your skill,” He continued and he pressed closer to you, his blue eyes boring into your own. “Just promise me to be watchful.” Haldir finished, his free hand moved to your calf for a brief moment of contact but enough to feed your hunger for him.

His gaze struck you dumb, a heat rising to your cheeks. All you could do was nod mutely in return, the blue of his eyes usually clear as the summer sky were troubled and stormy. Was the thought of your safety that important to him? Perhaps he thought of you also as more of a friend?

A watery smile tugged at your lips at the possibility, a foolish notion to be sure for someone so perfect to find attraction in the imperfections of a mortal such as yourself. You leaned down and the bittersweetness of causing him concern selfishly comforted you slightly in that you were not alone in the emotion when he had parted from you to go on patrols. Now before him, you missed him so and you had not even left his presence.

“I promise you Haldir,” You had spoken softly, proud that there was no wobble to your tone as you reached out and grasped his shoulder. Those blue eyes cleared of the storm for a moment.

“I will write every time I stop, you shall receive so many letters you will regret asking me,” you tried laughing and you saw the corner of his lips curled up slightly. “You shall receive so many you will have to clear a bookcase to house them.” You giggled lightly at the image and he gave a breathy laugh that sounded more like a relieved exhale. His hand returned to your calf and squeezed lightly.

“I shall clear two.” He stated with the deadpan tone that you have come to crave. Tilting your head you stared at him a moment to engrave the way the sunlight played across his face, it lit the blue of his eyes in a blinding shade that you would willingly go sightless staring at. He seemed to be watching you just as carefully and you smiled softly at him, in the way that only he provoked from you.

“Just as well, Rúmil and Orophin have gifted me enough supplies to paper your flet.” You smirked and watched as the mention of his brothers made Haldir grimace a moment. The hand on your calf moved to your hand resting on his shoulder.

“Best to put them to good use then, I shall hear no end of it if you do not.” Haldir had spoke in that exasperated tone he always used when speaking of his younger brothers. You couldn’t help the grin on your face though at the twitch of a smile on his lips that always betrayed his tone.

A tightness in your chest returned then, you would miss them all, Rúmil and Orophin never failing to make you laugh at their antics. Their merciless teasing of Haldir stretched now to you in a way that gave you a sense of pride that the brothers felt comfortable enough to torment you.

Haldir's hand was warm against your own, the rough callous of his fingers a seductive rasp against your responsive skin. Goosebumps danced up your arm at the contact. Your gazes met again and a heavy silence fell over you both. The cool breeze in the trees whispered around you as the heat from earlier played across your cheeks again.

Parting from him shouldn’t give you such pain, but knowing you would wake up the next morning not being able to see his face made your stomach turn in unease. Goodbyes were never such a heartbreak for you before with a life constantly on the road but now? Here where the breeze was sweet in your nose and the warm sun dappled on your skin this was a place that finally felt like a home now despite being a mere mortal.

You let your eyes lower as you don’t want Haldir to see the sadness in your gaze, not when you were parting like this.

“Promise me you will stay safe also Haldir.” You whispered, his fingers had flinched when you spoke his name.

“I promise.” Haldir stated resolutely. Slowly raising yourself straight in the saddle you reluctantly withdrew your hand from his shoulder. Haldir stood watching you again with that inscrutable look for a heartbeat before raising a hand to his chest in a farewell gesture.

You mimic the gesture and force a smile on your face though you can feel the burn of tears behind it.

“Farewell Marchwarden Haldir.” You spoke, the forced smile started to crack. Moving your horse forward through the forest you had felt eyes watching you the whole time and knew it wasn’t your imagination.

*****

A knock and giggle from behind you snapped your mind to the present again as the door to your room opened.

Twisting around you see the familiar face of the servant girl Molly bustles in. Turning back you frown and rest your fingers on the letter in front of you again. Sighing softly you look out the window of your guest room in Minas Tirith. The sun starting to set it lit up the city below, throwing shadows across the stone you mind wanders off to tall trees and blue eyes.

Lazily leaning on your hand the picture of Haldir gazing at you plays across your mind again. You had never seen a more perfect colour of blue than his eyes. No sky, ocean or flower could come close to his piercing gaze. It had not taken you long to understand it was not just the colour but the soul behind the eyes that made them so alluring. You felt a pull to him from the moment the two of you had met.

You counted yourself lucky that Haldir had given you the opportunity to become close. Though the act of saving the others' life in heavy battles, had helped forge a bond between you and the handsome ellon. It was he who had invited you to stay with him after Aragon's coronation having now no fixed plans. Your old companions had teased you mercilessly after finding out.

"An invitation from the Marchwarden himself? A rare thing indeed." Aragon had asked with a large grin and a wink making flushed heat rush from head to toe as you stood beside the elf. Stealing a glance up at him you had noticed the twitch in Haldir's jaw.

You hear Molly clear her throat behind you and you blink away the memory.

“Sorry for disturbing you m’lady would you like me to lay your dress out?” Her warm voice makes you shake your thoughts.

Turning around again you face her smiling, glad of her company.

“Yes please and tell me any new gossip.” You grin. Molly clicks her tongue but throws a smile back at you.

“Of course, you need new material for your letter to your friend?” She asks but the sly look and emphasis on “friend” makes you glance at the floor as you try to squash the girlish giggle.

“I enjoy his company, he’s a very interesting person.” You try to insist as Molly opens the wardrobe and with an expert eye pulls out a long gown.

“Of course he is,” She replies, her dark eyes are warm and clearly don’t believe you. “I caught a glimpse of him at the Kings coronation,” Molly continued plucking out accessories. Turning to you she raised an eyebrow and tried to look serious. “He looked very interesting.” She teased lightly.

“Oh stop you.” You grouse half heartedly. Standing up you make your way over to the bed and trail your fingers over the fine gown laid out. Surely it was a little over the top for a small party? You go to voice this but stop yourself after all Molly knows more than you ever could about court protocol and the younger woman had been a godsend in helping you navigate the intricate politics thus far.

“Does he answer back?” The other woman asks innocently. You stand over the dress still and go silent. Noticing your actions Molly turns from the hair pins laid out and tentatively steps over.

That was the thing, the thing that hit you like a gut punch and made you lie awake at night. All the letters you had written over the weeks you had not received any in return. You didn’t want to admit the thought made you not sleep for the last couple of weeks though the results were clear every time you saw your reflection.

“No.” You reply still gazing at the dress. Focusing on the delicate embroidery of flowers and vines it made you think of lush forests and your stomach lurched. You felt Mollys body hover near you.

“I’m sure he’s just been busy m’lady.” She voiced softly.

“Yes, he has a lot of responsibilities.” You say carefully, feeling your throat constrict around the words. You hoped that was the case, he was on a long patrol and couldn’t write back. But what if he had been hurt or what if he just didn’t want to indulge a silly human and her infatuation? You clasp a hand to your chest at the dull ache hiding behind your ribs at the thought. Perhaps it was time to stop the letters.

A hand drifted over your arm gently luring you away as the door knocked again.

“Come m’lady the bath is here then let's get you ready.”

You hum in agreement as the bedroom door opens and two other servants carry in a tub with jugs of hot water.

“Where is Eowyn?” You ask out of reflex, speaking to her always lifts your heart.

“Lady Eowyn went riding earlier. I’m sure she is getting ready now for tonight.”

You hum again, tonight’s party was to be a smaller affair. You hoped that it was for an announcement between Eowyn and Faramir’s wedding date. The way the two of them looked at each other, if they didn’t get married soon you were sure they would be announcing something other than a wedding.

The bath is quickly set up and Molly closes the bedroom door softly behind the other servants, before coming back over. The scent of lavender and honey drifts over from the tub of water. Scents that should give you some comfort but the icy claws of doubt have struck deep in your chest.

“May I help you with your dress?” She asks, her hands neatly folded in front of her.

You nod silently still looking at the flowers on the dress, it was a beautiful gown gifted by Eowyn for tonight. Raising your hands to your face you pinch your cheeks lightly, this was no face for a party. Seeing your old companions would cheer you up, you were sure of it.

*****

The stone of the balcony was cold to your touch as you clutched in the night air. You had left the party and wandered outside to take a breath of fresh air, the ballrooms' heat with the tight corset of the dress you were wearing was not a happy match.

Earlier thoughts of distracting your mind with the welcomed company of your friends had worked for a little while. But after some time the world had seemed to shift, you were watching them laugh and dance as if you were looking through a window from outside. You felt an outsider lost, alone and unbearable cold in this sweltering hall. Taking your goblet you nodded to the others and whispered to Eowyn you needed a breath of air, her bright eyes had glanced at the closed main door before nodding her response.

“You look beautiful tonight.” She had whispered to you.

“I look tired.” You retorted. Her gaze is quick and sharp, little escaped her notice.

“Does something ail you?” Eowyn asked and you tried to open your mouth but one look into her eyes and you stopped. That knowing gaze, a mixture of sympathy and pity. You let a bitter smile twist on your face.

“Am I that obvious?” You asked and hoped the others wouldn’t come and pry. You know they mean well but the thought of having to talk about it fills you with an exhaustive dread.

“Only to me,” She said softly and made a show of smiling brightly, fingers running over the sleeve of your gown, pretending to comment on it. “I know that look too well my sister in arms,” You can ‘t help but smile at the honour of her calling you that. “I know because I wore it’s mirror image not that long ago.”

Leaning close she pressed a soft kiss to your cheek she whispered softly making you close your eyes tight to shut out the threat of tears.

“I will see you happy again sister.” She finished, your closed eyes fluttered and missed the furtive glance she gave the door again.

“I’ll be back soon. I just need a moment to myself.” You said leaning back. Seeing her smile and nod, you had walked out.

Closing your eyes you feel the night air cool the sweat beading at your hairline after being in that ballroom. The heady scent of honeysuckle makes you dizzier than the wine at your elbow. The city beyond was quiet at this height, the twinkling lights below like stars. Perhaps you could make your life here now? You would be welcomed for sure. You should stop writing the letters now, let Haldir go, it could never work. He only saw you as a friend, a comrade in arms. Not as a woman, not as an equal in soul.

Perhaps that was for the best, with how short a mortal could live compared to the age that elves did it would be selfish of you to ask for that love from him knowing it would be a blink of his eye and you would be old and grey. That you would be dead and dust and he would have to live on with that grief.

No this would be for the best then. You nodded to yourself and picked up the wine to take a sip. Lost in your own thoughts you never notice the presence of someone approaching behind.

"Hiril vuin," comes a familiar voice from the shadows and you feel your breath hitch. Turning slowly you grip the goblet in your hand till your knuckles hurt, it can't be him? You're tired and thoughts are just added surely?

Silhouetted in the doorway stands a tall broad chested figure. The moonlight catches his features as he takes a step closer and whispers your name.

"Haldir?" You call with a pitiful whisper, praying you were not dreaming.

"Good evening," he says, all shadow and silver light.

You can't help but give an incredulous laugh and confused smile.

"I can't believe it!" You cry with a catch in your voice. "Am I dreaming?" You ask the night air as he moves to stand in front of you.

"I'm very real." he replies, smiling gently. The blond ellon is just as tall and perfect as you remember, dressed in his grey grab as Marchwarden. Reaching out a hand you let your fingertips graze his chest and sweep up to rest on his shoulder. There's a near perceptible shiver that runs through him at the physical contact. He watches you carefully, seemingly finding your giddy wonder amusing.

“What are you doing here?” You ask, still not fully convinced this is a fanciful hallucination brought on by drink and the heat.

He raises a perfect eyebrow and paces a hand on your own that is still on his chest.

“I was invited and I came for an important task.” He responds, his voice low and calming as if to soothe an excitable child. Perhaps that’s what he saw you as. The thought makes the smile slip from your face and you try to pull away but his grip on your hand stops you. You pause and look at him quizzically.

“Important task?” You ask and he nods.

“Yes but now is not the moment to talk of it.”

You press closer to him and let your trapped hand splay across the broad expanse of his chest. You can almost feel the quick thrumming of his heart, perhaps he arrived in a hurry.

“Aragon and the others are inside if it is that important.” You say and his expression gives nothing away. His eyes make you shiver though. The blue you love is a thin ring of silver in the moonlight, blond lashes catch the light like gossamer. This close you fancy you can see your desire for him in your own eyes reflected in his blown out pupils. The black expanse drawing you in.

Your earlier sensible thoughts of moving on from him are promptly forgotten now, you are a mere moth to the radiance that pours off him. It was foolish to ever think you could extract yourself from him.

“Calad nin.” He whispers and his free hand reaches out carefully to touch your shoulder. The meaning of his words are not lost on you, you wonder if he could hear your thoughts about being drawn to his light. For surely he does not feel the same as you do.

“I have missed you.” You confess and the tell of his lips curling slightly makes you want to reach out and trace it. Engrain it in your memory till you can always feel it at your tips.

“As I have missed you.” He replies and the words alone make you grin wildly.

“You have?”

“You doubt me?” He retorts with a quirk of an eyebrow in a mockery of admonishment.

“Never.” You breathe out, a giggle escaping in the process, and fling yourself at him, clutching at him tightly. Your carefully pinned hair is surely a mess but you'll face Molly’s scolding later for wrecking her hard work.

It takes a moment before he responds. A strong arm wraps around you and drags you closer till you’re not sure where you start and he ends. If only it could always be like this. The evening wind whistles against the unforgiving stone as the two of you stand still clutched at each other.

“Did you get my letters?” You ask eventually breathing in his scent. The fresh smell of woodland and sandalwood makes you relax.

“Yes.” He responds, his arm around your waist has moved to the small of your back running his fingertips where your spine is hiding under the corset. Not moving your head you run your fingers over the edge of his robe.

“You never replied.” You say in a small voice you barely recognise as your own. You feel a sense of accomplishment you have kept out the hurt or accusation from the tone.

“When you left,” He started and then with a little protest from you he pulls you back a little so that he could see your face. “I was sent on patrol for a few weeks, you’re letters were passed on to me when they could but,” And he pauses and looks over you from head to toe as if only realising your state of dress.

“You are truly a sight to behold,” He breathes out like a prayer. You grip his arms and feel the heat from your face rush below. Twisting your fingers in the bulky sleeves of his tunic you wet your bottom lip and don’t miss the narrow of his eyes on the action.

“You were saying?” You asked and tugged in his sleeves.

“Yes,” He continues and he looks momentarily embarrassed that he had his previous statement aloud. “I was on patrol till only a few days ago and my own stationary supply was very limited and couldn’t send my replies back,” He releases you a moment and digs into a pocket within the recesses of his robes.

Letting go of his arms you fiddle with the sleeve of your gown as he extracts a bundle. Haldir passes it over to you solemnly like a great treasure and to you it is. Wrapped neatly with a green ribbon is a small stack of envelopes. You take them reverently and hold them in both hands. Your name is written neatly in a precise, strong hand that fits Haldir well.

“You replied.” You say out loud as the doubts and heartbreak of unrequited affection are doused.

“Did you think I would not?” He says and this time there is a tone of reproach to him.

“I- I know how busy you are, important,” You start and he takes a step forward to you as you stare at the bundle of letters not trusting yourself to be able to stop crying in relief if you look at him.

“With responsibilities other than replying to my silly letters.” You choke out and you curse yourself for getting so emotional. His hands are suddenly on your own cupping the letters between you both. The calluses on his fingertips trace up to your wrists causing another flush of heat to pool below.

“Nothing about you is silly.” He tells you and you close your eyes as his thumbs stroke across the pulse in your wrist. Eru, the things the ellon did to you with such a simple touch.

“I feel it at times when it comes to you,” You say softly. “A silly human yearning for your attention.” His hands still and you bite your lip. You’ve gone too far. The hands on your wrist slide with deliberate slow ease, an illicit seductiveness.

“Look at me,” He commands and you lift your head immediately, your breath catches in your throat at his look. Silver hair and intense eyes as he moves a step closer making you tilt your head back to look up at him and keep eye contact.

“There you are,” He speaks and his voice is low like a purr. “I will only say this once, I never want you to put yourself down because you are human.”

You nod softly and bite your lip.

“The things you do to me,” He mutters. “The way you move me,”

One of his hands trails up to your jaw tracing along it. All you can do is let out a soft whimper at the contact. “No one else has been able to do so in all my years, regardless of who or where they were born.” His thumb moves to swipe over your bottom lip.

“But I have only a short number of years Haldir compared to you. If we,” And you pause now not sure how to word your thoughts.

“If we?” He asks provocatively.

“If we are together,” You continue and heat rushes to your face and down below at what that implies and he hums deep in his chest at the word. “How could I sleep with you beside me knowing the inevitability of what will happen to us? Of leaving you begrudgingly alone and I am nothing but bone and dust?” You raise one of your hands to cup his jaw and he leans into it his warm lips as they press against the delicate skin of your inner wrist. Goosebumps ripple along your arm and across your collarbone.

“Has this been troubling you?” He asks and rubs his nose to nuzzle your pulse.

You nod again as his gaze watches you carefully.

“I wish you had spoken to me sooner so I could ease your mind,” He states. “It is the nature of things that we will die.” He states calmly.

“But,” You start.

“Maybe it will be I who dies first.” He interrupts you.

“Haldir, that’s not funny.” You scold but he only looks at you with a flicker of surprise.

“I was trying to flatter you.”

“Flattery is telling me how pretty I look in this dress, not that there’s a chance you will leave me a grieving heartbroken woman.” You retort hotly and he presses his lips to the pounding pulse under your skin and smiles.

“You're breathtaking in that dress.” He corrects you.

“Haldir,” You start and his lips twitch into that smile.

“And when you’re angry,” He adds and you look at him with what can only be exasperation.

“You are not alone with those thoughts, I spent a long time thinking of the exact same thing.’ He continues and the irritation subsides in you.

“And?” You say almost frightened at what his conclusion is.

He still has your hand and leans into its touch, closing his eyes a second seeming to savour it.

“That a life without you would grieve me more,” Haldir speaks softly. “In all my years I have given myself freely to the responsibilities of my position as an older brother then Marchwarden, it is something I will not ever regret,” His eyes open and flick to you and his a chaste brush of his lips to your fingertips he pulls your hand back to the letters you are both still holding. “Till I met you, grew to know you. I have never wanted anything for myself,” You watch his expression shift from contemplative to resolute.

“Neither of us knows the future and how long we have,” Haldir pauses. “But I do know that the future is meaningless without knowing your love. I shall continue to exist but it shall only be that.” He brings both your hands up to rest on his chest above his heart.

“A song does not last forever but to experience it let it live in you is what makes us alive, though we may mourn it’s end,” Haldir leans down so his nose rubs against your own softly and now it’s your turn to close your eyes to savour the action.

“So will you take a chance and let us sing this song of ours together?” He whispers to you and you let your eyes flutter open. It should be intimidating to see his trademark intense gaze but it only makes your lip wobble and eyes fill with hot tears of happiness.

You move one of your hands from his grip and reach up to his jaw, fingers caressing it and watch as it tenses under your touch. You let it linger before following the line of Haldir's throat, his adam's apple bobbing as your fingers touch his jugular. You can feel his own heartbeat race under your skin.

“Yes Haldir.” You answer and his impassive mask breaks as he smiles as though he wasn’t sure you would agree.

“Yes?” He asks and exhales, letting his shoulders drop with a short soft laugh.

“Yes Marchwarden.” You repeat and close your eyes to let out a small giggle as he pulls you against him again. His arm tightens around your waist as he buries his nose in your hair. Your free hand wraps around his neck as you move your face to press a soft kiss to his jaw. Haldir lets out a low sound that vibrates through you and makes your toes curl. Moving slightly he presses his lips to your ear making you tremble.

“You shiver, are you cold?" He asks, his voice low and lilting.

"No it's not the cold that makes me shiver." You say and turn to meet his gaze. Those ice blue eyes are burning and you revel in the fire.

Haldir's arm runs up your back as he mutters words in Sindarin too quickly for you to catch. His hand stops at the nape of your neck before cupping the base of your skull. His breath fans your cheeks and you close your eyes in anticipation of the handsome ellons kiss. Your ellon now, you licked your bottom lip at the realisation.

There was a brief heartbeat before you felt his chapped lips brush against your own. The chaste action made you mewl softly and you felt the low groan from him before he pressed closer. His plush lips unforgiving against your own as you kissed back desperately. Your arm moves to loop around his neck to tug on his long hair and you're rewarded with a grunt and sigh from Haldir as he nips at your bottom lip. Sighing with content you grant him access to your own mouth which he ravishes with the keen precision he does in everything.

You tug on his hair again and let out your own soft moan as he tilts his head to kiss you deeper. Both of you are teeth and tongue as you scrabble for one another. There’s a far away cheering and laughing over the start of a song that startles you both apart.

You try to catch your breath but it’s difficult when you're tangled with Haldir in his vice-like grip. He’s gazing at you again with a softness that makes your chest feel like it will burst.

“If this is a dream don’t wake me.” You state to the universe and Haldir's lip curls slightly softening his usual steely expression.

"It should be I who asks if you are the dream." He finishes.

"Why is that?" You say, your fingers moving from his hair to graze his jaw.

"Standing in the moonlight is how I often dream of you." He murmurs and nuzzles against your cheek.

“And tell me, what do we do in these dreams, Marchwarden?” You tease and let out a breathy laugh as he lets out a shaky exhale.

“I would rather show you dearest.” He mutters his voice dark and delicious as his arm moves so his fingers hold your hip tight.

The sound of laughing and music fades back in again interrupting

“Maybe we should wait till we’re sure we won’t be interrupted?” You ask your throat going dry at the thought of being alone and playing out your own dreams with him. You hear him agree and press a chaste kiss to the corner of your lips.

Pulling back from each other you run a hand over your hair to try and see if it can be saved and do a half hearted attempt at fixing it. You had all you needed now, you could stand to play a little loose with propriety. Smoothing your gown down, you glance up to see him standing watching you with what only could be described as wolfishness that sent your pulse racing again. You reached up and smoothed his own hair and gasped as he grabbed your wrist.

“Haldir?” You ask as he presses his lips against your wrist again.

“Your pulse flutters like a bird.” He states calmly.

“And who’s fault is that?” You accuse him which only makes him smile longingly at you.

“I shall bear the responsibility, I apologise I needed something to sustain me a while till we could be alone again.” He reports so matter of factly it makes you grin.

“And when shall I have time to read your replies my dearest?” You laugh and Haldir pauses a moment.

“That was the important matter I came here to discuss.” He tells you calmly and you frown.

“What is it?” You ask concerned. He steps closer again and brushes the back on his fingers against your hand which you immediately turn your own hand to clutch on to.

“On a desperate matter of if you should feel ready to return with me.” He whispers softly, leaning down so he is eye level with you.

“Return to Lórien?” You ask with a quiet excitement as he nods.

“To return home meleth nin.” He says and watches your reaction. You blink a moment as the words sink in.

Home.

Hot tears fall immediately but Haldir is already holding your face gently and wiping them away with his thumbs.

“Meleth nin?” He asks all serious and alarm. You can’t help but give a gasping laugh which makes him relax again.

“Of course I shall you silly ellon,” You mutter and close your eyes as he kisses you again though softly as if to remind himself you are truly saying those words. “I love you after all.” You confess and you feel his smile against your lips.

“I love you too.” He whispers then says something soft in Sindarian which you need no translation for.

A loud applause erupts from inside as the music finishes.

“We should go back inside, I need to speak to Eowyn,” You say and pull back holding his hand to trail after you to the inside door. Pausing, you look at him, grinning wide and ecstatic.

“I shall tell her I am needed and will be going home soon.” You explain with a mock primness. He glances down and in the moonlight you swear it almost seems he is blushing.

“Yes, you are very much needed.” He agrees with such solemnity. But even in this light you can see his telltale twitch of lips.

“After all, I have important correspondence to catch up on.” You murmur with a happy smile as you press the letters close to your heart.

Haldir smiles warmly and presses a kiss to your hand before letting go and stepping close.

“I shall clear another bookcase at home for them all meleth nin.” He whispers with a smile.

#haldir #haldir x reader #lord of the rings #haldir fanfiction #lotr fanfic

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themattress · 2 years ago

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OUAT Observation

In retrospect, Season 2 was a Sophomore Slump that Once Upon a Time was never truly able to recover from, despite all of Season 3′s best efforts. However, while the show would certainly get worse than how it was in Season 2, there’s still a fascinating uniqueness to how it went off the rails. This is pretty much the only season (other than the final one due to the sudden cancellation) where I feel they had a road map going into it that they just trashed.

For those who don’t know what I mean, it’s been confirmed that with each season renewal there is a session between the writers where the new season’s road map is created, which is then utilized when they reconvene that Summer to actually start writing the season. And the road map for Season 2 was clearly going smoothly for its first 6 episodes; everything felt tight and naturally flowing. But then we hit “Child of the Moon”, where not only did the requisite centric for new season regular Megan Ory and her Red/Ruby character get forcibly cobbled together with the teased Albert Spencer plotline, but a development was made that ensured Emma and Snow’s quest in the Enchanted Forest would come to its conclusion two episodes later, in time for the Winter break. I highly doubt this was originally planned; it feels like the idea going into Season 2 was for that quest to end closer to the middle of the season, with the discovery of Baelfire/Neal in Manhattan occurring closer to the climax...after all, the season opened with a sequence all about him in that part of New York City. Just as Season 1 opened with the Curse being cast and ended with the Curse being broken, Season 2 was to open with Neal as the focus and end with him as the focus. And, well, it still does...kind of.

After this alteration, the season was on track to have Neal found in the middle of the season, and it would conclude either with a battle against Cora or against Regina who spirals out of control following Cora’s death. After all, before “Manhattan”, the focus was still on the threat Cora posed, especially now that Regina had joined up with her, and it was still continuing focus on plotlines and characters the season had set up (Hook and Smee, Mulan and Philip, Red/Ruby, Dr. Frankenstein and his monsterified brother, Anton/Tiny the Giant, all of the core characters’ personal arcs, etc.), plus threads that could be pursued in the following season (Emma’s magic, Snow and Charming’s disagreement on whether to stay in Storybrooke or not, Belle’s amnesia, Greg Mendell, etc.) But it was at the time of making “Manhattan” that a bombshell dropped: A&E, perhaps due to their usage of Hook and Smee being met with acclaim, were granted full rights to use everything else from Peter Pan. And because they had a passion for that property and the ideas they had for it, they just burned the season’s road map altogether and redirected it toward ending with everyone going off to Neverland.

So many decisions made were centered around this choice: the removal of the scene with Rumple’s father in “Manhattan” since their plans for that character immediately changed, the whole “the boy will be your undoing” prophecy being geared specifically toward the Neverland situation, Neal knowing Hook and it being set up that he was a Lost Boy in Neverland, Neal’s fiancée Tamara being introduced to be the “Her” that Greg Mendell was in touch with and revelation that they’re anti-magic activists unknowingly working for Peter Pan, and literally every single plot thread that had no place in the Neverland story either being dropped altogether (Red/Ruby, the Frankenstein stuff, Emma further awakening her magic powers, and any on-screen resolution to restoring Philip’s soul) or wrapped up as hastily and anticlimactically as possible (the darkness in Snow’s heart, August’s situation, the magic beans, Belle’s memory loss and new cursed identity, and Regina’s status as the villain).

Because of this rush, there wasn’t enough time to properly think through or flesh out a lot of the story decisions being made, which - along with A&E’s skewed morality - made “Welcome to Storybrooke” through “The Evil Queen” such an aimless, unpleasant slog to sit through. Another consequence is that one of the writers who had been there since the beginning, Ian Goldberg, jumped ship, clearly more interested in working with the setting and characters the show already had and resenting the sudden directional shift A&E had forced upon everyone.

Despite all of this, I want to stress that everyone involved was still trying the best that they could which still was able to shine through (ex: “Welcome to Storybrooke has some chillingly good direction, music and acting, and even in the moments it’s not intentionally trying to be “Lacey” is a highly funny episode, as are parts of “The Evil Queen”.) And as much as it pains me to admit, A&E were totally justified in wanting to get to Neverland ASAP, since the Neverland Saga ended up providing so many things the show and its characters were in desperate need of, the dark take on the Peter Pan story was very clever and interesting, and doing it right then allowed them to cast Robbie Kay as Peter Pan while he was still the right age for it, and he gave one of the greatest villainous performances in the entire series.

In the end, Season 2 and its messy storyline is what it is. Not entirely good, not entirely bad, but certainly entirely interesting and something that I look back on more fondly overtime.

#Once Upon a Time #ABC #Opinion #Analysis #This has been a PSA

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theanimeview · 3 years ago

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Belle - Please Erase the Last Half of This Movie From My Mind (Review)

By: Beata Garrett | @zhongxia246

Belle won me over for the first hour with its gorgeous visuals, nuanced take on the power of the internet, and soundtrack. At least, that was until I saw the turn it was taking in the latter half and thought, Please no, don’t do this.

It’s hard to reconcile my overwhelmingly positive feelings for the first half with the dismay I felt later, but I’m going to try.

The movie follows Suzu, a shy high school student living in a rural village.

Since her mother’s death, she’s had difficulties singing and connecting with other people. But when she enters the massive virtual world of “U,” she becomes Belle, a beautiful and beloved singer who’s afraid of nothing. One day, her concert is interrupted by a monstrous user called Dragon. As she connects more to this mysterious “beast” and learns of his wounds, she must decide who she truly wants to be and whether her secret identity is worth keeping.

The movie wastes no time throwing viewers into the world of “U,” and showing us how bright and exciting it is to be loved and famous. If you’ve seen director Mamoru Hosoda’s other work, Summer Wars, you’ll be struck by the resemblance of Belle’s virtual world, “U,” to “OZ.” I love the way Hosoda imagines the internet as a bewildering rush of highways and nonstop traffic, and how the logic of his virtual worlds are story-driven--there’s no point in criticizing how anything works because the emotion and fantasy is the point. By allowing “U” to scan your biometric data, your hidden strengths and true self are revealed, and that’s exactly what Suzu needs.

Hosoda did a great job making viewers empathic to Suzu by showing us the toll her mother’s death has taken on her. A montage depicts how happy the family was and where Suzu’s love of music came from then cuts to her death. It’s a noble death as she rescues a child stuck in a raging river, but the event leaves Suzu still struggles with her sadness and anger towards her mother for making that decision. This was a great character moment and gave me hope that Belle could tackle such difficult themes regarding grief.

Suzu’s only other friend is Hiro, whom I found to be both funny and terrible as a friend. She invited Suzu to “U,” and supports her more as a manager than she does as a good friend. Her only other friend is Shinobu, a popular boy whom Suzu has a crush on and who just wants her to open up. This is all he is throughout the entire movie, which made me feel like their relationship was a waste of screen time.

The only bright spot in the cast of supporting characters were Ruka and Kamishin, two characters with far less screen time that still become a cute couple by the end and felt like a much better emotional investment than the Shinobu and Suzu love story.

I was convinced for the first half of the movie that Shinobu was the antagonist because there is a vigilante or “princely” user (Justin) in U, but the antagonist(s) never gets any meaningful development.

This becomes emblematic of Belle’s biggest problem-–besides Suzu, none of the other characters are fleshed out or entertaining to watch. They feel and act like cardboard cutouts.

Perhaps this was a way to make Suzu stand out more within the story since, in her ‘real life’ she’s invisible and, in contrast, Suzu’s characterization does indeed stands out. Personally, I enjoyed the way her anxiety was depicted in reality versus the freedom she has in “U.”

Source: millennium parade - U

While the internet is harmful in many ways, it does allow people to have the freedom to put a version of themselves out there that they can’t be in real life, and to connect in meaningful ways to people they would otherwise never meet. As soon as Belle arrives, she starts singing the incredibly catchy “U” by millennium parade that I’ve had on my playlist for months.

youtube

Title: millennium parade - U

Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R3V4sAXUJ-g&ab_channel=millenniumparadeOfficialYouTubeChannel

Predictably, people both love and hate her, introducing one of the film’s strong points: the effects of fame. This is done very well through characters like Belle, Dragon, and even includes some of the supporting characters, like Ruka. They’re heroes to some and enemies or villains to others, which is how celebrities in real life are often viewed.

Dragon is a hero to kids but monstrous to adults, and the adoration of Belle grows once she’s perceived as Dragon’s victim only helps to solidify that mindset in people’s minds.

I find the little ways in which Hosoda depicts the lives of others through social media is fascinating and condemns the easy anonymity of hating or worshiping someone on the internet. The twist on the classic fairytale of Beauty and the Beast is also clever, and Dragon had a lot of potential to serve as a well-written counterpart to Belle. It’s a shame that the reveal of his identity was so…distasteful.

For example, a part of his mystique are the bruises on his avatar which seem to increase with every virtual fight he has... only to have that note discarded when it becomes clear that Dragon’s real-life identity is a child, Kei, being physically abused and that “U[’s]” interface is simply carrying that onto his virtual identity through the constantly updating biometrics scan.

The bruises are what leads Suzu on her quest to find Dragon’s real identity, and she ponders the mystery of them throughout the movie prior to discovering their real cause. I would’ve preferred that the bruises were an indication of his emotional turmoil rather than what it turns out to be--the markings of physical abuse he’s suffered at the hands of his father while trying to protect his brother.

This revelation is the beginning of the movie’s worst half. From there, Belle sidelines Suzu’s grief and the healing process to focus on a simplistic rescue story. Now that Suzu knows who Dragon is, she must save him from his father who’s a complete caricature of an abusive person. There’s a wonderfully animated scene of her singing with her true face to win Kei’s trust with millions of users singing alongside her, but even that fell flat in its emotional impact.

Source: https://gkids.com/films/belle/

Honestly, the depiction of Kei and his brother’s trauma upset me a lot. On one hand, Hosoda nailed an important insight of how hard it can be to help someone when you find out they are in an unsafe situation. Calling the police or encouraging them to tell someone may put them in even more danger and there are solutions that those kids have probably already done or thought of that didn’t work.

Kei’s feeling of hopelessness is completely reasonable and it doesn’t help that Suzu comes to check up on him only to... well, return home--presumably, leaving him and his brother under the continued care of their father. One of the supporting characters does call the police but it was already shown that this is ineffective. I was incredibly angry when he hugged Suzu and said something along the lines of, “You showed me how to be strong and now I’m going to fight, too.”

Source: https://www.reddit.com/r/movies/comments/qmebct/discussion_on_belle_ryuu_to_sobakasu_no_hime/

First of all, being weak or being strong has nothing to do with being a victim of abuse. And…is that all? I would’ve given the movie a bit of a pass if Kei and his brother began living with Suzu but Belle doesn’t even give that to these kids.

We have no idea what happens to them--whether they get help, are able leave, or even an update of things that have changed. We get nothing to complete this major part of the story and that’s just bad writing.

Source: https://ianime0.tumblr.com/post/664753880604753920/ryuu-to-sobakasu-no-hime-are-you-really-belle/amp

In conclusion, this was a beautifully animated movie that should’ve focused on Suzu and the role of music in her story of coming to terms with her mother’s death. Like other Hosoda movies, Belle is filled with gentle moments that will make you teary-eyed but wastes the rest of its runtime with bland side characters and a muddled plot. Overall, it’s a hit-and-miss movie that left me confused and angry when I came out of the theater, and I know I’ll only watch the first half if I ever see it again.

#Belle #Belle 2021 #Review #Movie review #Music #analysis #belle ryu to sobakasu no hime dragon #ryu to sobakasu no hime dragon #belle: ryu to sobakasu no hime dragon #The Dragon and The Freckled Princess #belle: The Dragon and The Freckled Princess #belle The Dragon and The Freckled Princess

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hawkinsschoolcounselor · 3 years ago

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hi im on a byler theory binge rn after rewatching st again and i just discovered your account and i like hearing what you think season 4 will bring. 2 things: what is rebel robin??

and do you think byler will be pretty much confirmed by the end of this season and then we see more of them in season 5? i think since the run time will be so much longer that theres a lot more room for them to fully develop their dynamic and they could easily admit their feelings for each other by the last episode but a lot of people think they’ll save it for the last season or it’ll be a cliff hanger. i think they’ll kiss by the last episode bc so far every ship that started to grow in a season kissed by the last episode. season 1: milleven and season 2: lumax and i think in season 3 it wouldve been robin and steve but instead they had her come out. it makes sense for season 4 to be mike realizing his feelings and maybe a cliffhanger on the first volume but in the second volume on the last or second to last episode he kisses him. sorry im rambling now i just really fuckin want this season to be out now !!!! id love to know your thoughts on when they’ll kiss

Ah, sorry, I guess I missed this one.

Your easy question first. Rebel Robin is a Stranger Things novel released this past summer. It tells the story of Robin's sophomore year in high school where she has a crush on Tammy Thompson. We get to see the events of season 1 occur in the background while we watch Robin go through her gay realization. It's a good, if easy, read, and it can be very affirming to people like me who grew up in an era before widespread LGBT acceptance.

The longer runtime of season 4 does bring a lot of opportunity for Mike to go through his own realization without it seeming cheap or rushed. I don't think we'll get anything super concrete regarding Mike and Will, but I do think we'll get something more than subtext. Will will almost certainly be confirmed as being gay. Mike is a tougher nut to crack. I feel like they can't confirm everything this season without leaving them with little to do with their individual character arcs in season 5, but we do need to get something more firm.

I think what season 4 will give us is some resolution on Mike and El. That is also something that shouldn't be rushed. Though I wonder how much time there will be for that if El spends a significant amount of time in custody. Whether he loves her romantically or not, Mike would certainly freak out over her being taken, and this could result in him clinging to her even more when they get her back. Those two have their own feelings to resolve, and they deserve the chance to get that before Mike and Will get together.

I don't like to think about two teenagers kissing at my age, but it is the classic way to resolve a story like theirs. I expect a lot of tears before, and perhaps during, such a turn of events, though. Both from the characters and the audience.

#stranger things 4 #byler

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viastro · 5 years ago

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second life | xu minghao

ミ★ synopsis: in which jun and jeonghan pick out a book titled, Second Life, and find a message written to someone on the title page. it’s only then that they learn the untold story of two lovers who met at a library 35 years ago.

ミ★ genre: soulmate!au (kinda ?), multiple lives!au, fluff, light angst

ミ★ warnings: major character death (it’s not bad i promise)

ミ★ word count: 4,219

ミ★ pairings: xu minghao x female reader

ミ★ notes: hi guys! when i wrote this oneshot, i couldn’t think of any other published book, so i decided to reference @sunlightwoo‘s series, Second Life, which is really good so make sure to check it out ! i’m going to be a bit busy these upcoming weeks because i have finals soon, and i also just got a job as a boba barista ! i’ll try to post a oneshot at least once a week, but we’ll see how that goes HAHAHA as always, make sure to give lots of love to minghao <3 i hope you guys enjoy this one !!

“Who would wanna go to the library over the amusement park? And why is it you instead of Minghao?” Jun rolls his eyes at Jeonghan’s questions as the two of them step into the city library. They bow their heads in the elderly librarian’s direction, before walking further into the pretty empty space.

“Minghao keeps telling me to read more cause he’s tired of me bothering him.” Jun mutters as his eyes trail across the numerous books on the shelves. Jeonghan purses his lips, before nodding his head in agreement, knowing that Minghao is on the verge of possibly committing homicide if Jun barges into his apartment one more time unannounced.

“This looks nice.” Jun says quietly to himself as he pulls out the story titled, Second Life. He opens the cover, only to tilt his head at the writing scrawled on the title page. Jeonghan raises an eyebrow at Jun’s confused expression, so he leans in close to check out what he’s looking at.

for yn,

as a reminder for a fairly wonderful day. i hope for many more to come.

affectionately yours,

xmh

“I guess this book was donated?” Jeonghan asks, glancing down at the page to see that it was published long before the two were alive. Jun nods his head, and they head over to the front desk to rent the story.

“Ah, no one’s checked out this book in a long time.” The librarian says softly, hand grazing slightly over the written words. Jun and Jeonghan share a glance, before turning back towards the elderly woman. “Do you perhaps… know the person who wrote that message?”

She glances up at the two handsome men, seeing their curious expressions on their faces. The librarian lets out a smile, nodding her head as she stamps the sticker in the book and slides it back in Jun’s direction.

“They were a beautiful couple. I was just a young girl starting my first job as a librarian when they first met here, actually.” Jun finds himself growing more intrigued, as does Jeonghan since the two appear to be holding onto the librarians every word.

“Can we hear their story?” Jeonghan asks, and they watch as the librarian smiles, before nodding her head. She gestures for them to move towards the couches, and she walks out from behind the desk and sits in front of the two.

“It’s a bit of a long one, if that’s okay.” The librarian warns, and Jun and Jeonghan shake their heads, telling her that it’s no problem. She lets out a sigh, glancing out the window to see the yellow rays from the warm, summer sun shine into the library.

“It was a beautiful spring day when they first met.”

Fucking hate pollen, you think grumpily to yourself as you rub your nose in an attempt to hold back the monstrous sneeze that threatens to escape if you inhale one more breath of the spring air. You notice the library around the corner, and quicken your pace as you walk over to escape from the allergy infested air.

Once you’re there, you practically rip open the door and jump inside the quiet building. You let out a sigh of relief once the door closes behind you, and you pause, realizing how loud you must’ve been when you entered the library. So you turn your head slowly, just to find the relatively young librarian standing there with wide eyes, and you let out a small smile.

“I’m so sor-” The words die in your throat when you feel that familiar feeling in the back of your nose, and you quietly try to fight it back.

god, please. I’m in the place that’s supposed to be quiet, so if you humiliate me and make me sne-

You let out a loud sneeze that resembles the sound of the large stampede of wildebeest that killed Mufasa in the Lion King, and it makes you want to shrivel up and die right in the entrance of the library. You wouldn’t mind, really. It’d be a peaceful way to go out, just right here. In this library. Actually, it’d be rather pleasa-

“Do you need a tissue?” You turn your head to see the young librarian holding out a tissue box from her desk, and you let out an embarrassed smile. Shaking your head, you lift up your hand to tell her that you’re fine, only to stop and turn when you hear the door open from behind you.

A tall man walks in with long red hair that’s parted down the middle. He’s wearing a black turtleneck with a sheer blue button down over it. Running a hand through his hair, he glances up from the floor and locks eyes with you once the door closes.

Love at first sight. You never believed it, didn’t understand the concept, really. Even thought it was stupid. How could you fall in love with someone just from a first glance?

So why is it that you can’t seem to be able to breathe as you stare up into his deep, brown eyes that seem to hold millions of thoughts as they bore into yours. Feeling heat rush up to your cheeks, you turn away first, and he quietly coughs into his shoulder.

“Sorry.” You mumble as you step to the side, feeling embarrassed for just staring at the ethereal man with an awed expression. You’re sure that he thinks you’re weird, and you debate on ways to escape the library while also being able to handle your allergies.

if i just shove the pieces of tissue up my nose, then i won’t sneeze every five seconds. brilliant.

However, the thoughts come to a stop when you find his hand outstretched towards you. Slowly, you glance up at the man, just to find a small smile on his face as he stares at you.

“Hi, I’m Minghao.” Biting the inside of your cheek, you slowly reach out and grasp his hand softly, letting out a grin when you do so. You watch as his eyes seem to twinkle in the sunlight, and you wonder how someone can be so ethereal as you say,

“Hi, I’m yn.”

“This book is taking a rather tragic turn.” You mutter as you turn the page, and Minghao glances at you out of the corner of his eye. He bites back a smile when he sees you upside down on the beanbag chair, reading Romeo and Juliet as you do so. Letting out a breath he responds, “You’ve read that book three times already, you should know that it’s not a good story.”

Rolling your eyes, you close the book and shoot the pretty man a glare. Minghao giggles when he sees you grumble to yourself about him always attacking you whenever you pick up any work of Shakespeares. You don’t blame him, Romeo and Juliet sucks, but you read the story for entertainment purposes.

“Always ruining my fun.” You complain as you move to the aisle to pick up another story. Minghao grins, placing his book down after marking his spot and following after you.

It’s been three months since you and Minghao met at this library, and the two of you have been meeting here almost every weekend just to read together. You’ve discovered that Minghao is not only physically pretty, but his talent and personality is truly unmatched. While Minghao has noticed that you shine brighter than all the stars in the sky whenever you speak of a book you’ve come to love.

Secretly the two of you have developed feelings for the other, but as always, neither of you have made a move.

“Are you going to pick out another boring story?” Minghao teases from beside you, and you shoot him a glare, “You stink.”

Minghao smiles, about to poke fun at you again, only to stop when he takes notice of the young librarian standing at the end of the aisle, holding up two glasses of water. You turn to glance in the direction Minghao is staring in, and immediately grin when you lock eyes with Areum.

“Areum! Are you going to read with us today?” You ask as you and Minghao walk over, quietly thanking her for the beverage as you both take a sip. She grins, shaking her head, and you immediately pout. “Why not?”

“I’m still on my shift, and I know how much you two enjoy your time together.” Areum says with a wink, and you feel the warmth rising to your face in an instant, quietly cursing Areum for her comments about you and Minghao.

Minghao clears his throat when Areum wiggles her eyebrows at him, and she smiles brightly at the two of you. “I’ll try and join you guys when I finish my shift, but just come to the front desk if you need anything.”

You both nod your head and watch as Areum turns and leaves the aisle. Letting out a breath, you turn and pull out a soft yellow book from the shelf, before walking back over to you and Minghao’s designated reading spot in the back of the library.

“What lame book did you get this time?” Minghao asks, and you scoff as you sit back down in the comfortable chair. You turn over so that you’re upside down, and he giggles at your strange position. “You’re lame.”

“Rude.” You grin at his response before holding out the book you chose, watching as the silver letters of the title reflect back at you. “It’s called, Second Life, I actually haven’t read this one before.”

Minghao purses his lips at the unfamiliar name, and you turn the book around so that he can also get a good look at it. Nodding his head, he pulls open his book again, “It seems interesting.”

“Wow, that’s the first time you didn’t call one of the books I chose, lame.” You joke, and Minghao chuckles. He shrugs his shoulders, turning to glance at you, only to find you already staring back at him.

Feeling the air shift between the two of you, you turn away after staring at each other in silence, and open up to the first page of the story. Minghao bites the inside of his cheek, before looking away and going back into his book as well.

The three unspoken words are left lingering in his brain as he glances over his book to take a peek at you, only to look back down.

“Do you believe in love at first sight?” You ask as you watch Minghao look through the numerous books on the shelf to try to figure out what to read. He halts his movements, turning to glance down at you. “Do you?”

Shrugging your shoulders, you glance down at the book you hold in your hands as you recall what you felt the first moment you and Minghao locked eyes. The pretty man purses his lips, feeling his heart thump within his chest as he finally pulls out a book he decided to read.

“I didn’t, originally.” Minghao begins, and you raise an eyebrow. He stays quiet for a second, debating on whether or not he should continue as you tilt your head to the side at his silence. Running a hand through your hair you ask, “What happened that made you change your mind?”

Minghao turns towards you, and your eyes widen slightly when you take in how nervous he looks. He bites the inside of his cheek, rethinking his decision one more time.

you can back out, there’s no reason to say anyth-

“Then I met you.” Minghao says softly, completely ignoring his rampant thoughts, and the two of you stare at each other in silence for a long time as you let his words soak in. He lets out a sad laugh at the shocked expression on your face, running a hand through his pretty red hair as he nods his head with a tight-lipped smile. “It’s okay, I understand-”

You take a step forward and wrap your arms around his waist, making the rest of Minghao’s words die in his throat. A smile forms on your face when you feel his arms tentatively wrap around your body, his hand moving to cradle your head.

“You love me too?” Minghao asks, sounding breathless due to the shock of the feeling being mutual. You nod your head, closing your eyes when you hear his rapid heartbeat against your ear.

“At first sight.” You mutter softly, and Minghao smiles at your words. He rests his cheek on the top of your head, and the two of you stay like that for a while in the library aisle. Books that are in your grasp now forgotten as you hold each other.

Areum glances up when she hears the doors to the library open, and lets out a small smile when she sees you and Minghao walking in, fingers intertwined as you both immediately head towards the front desk to greet the young librarian.

“Hi Areum!” You whisper excitedly, and Areum greets you and Minghao with just as much enthusiasm. Minghao watches with a fond smile when the two of you begin to discuss any strange customers walking into the library, and Areum grins when she catches sight of this.

You and Minghao have been dating for six months, and still manage to come to the library almost every weekend. Areum is sure that the two of you have read every single book in this library by now, but she doesn’t question it. She enjoys your guys’ company.

“I’m going to set up our spot, are you gonna talk to Areum?” You ask Minghao once you and Areum finish your conversation on the guy who walked into the library just to look for any dust. Minghao nods his head, and you shoot him a thumbs up, before walking over to the reading spot.

“Did you need something, Minghao?” Areum asks as she begins to sort through the books atop of her desk. Minghao nods his head, glancing over in the direction you walked off to see if you’ll hear anything. She raises an eyebrow when Minghao pulls out a book from the pocket on the inside of his jacket, watching as he places it in front of her.

“Second Life? Are you returning this?” Areum asks, and Minghao shakes his head. He purses his lips, before pointing at the book with his finger as he grabs a pen. “I was wondering if I could buy it. It’s the book yn was reading when I confessed to her, and I think it’d be ni-”

“Of course!” Minghao’s eyes widen slightly when Areum scans the book, having not expected it to be that easy.

“Really? Are you sure I don’t have to go through a process to get the book or like-”

“Nope, just pay the cost and the book is yours. It’s not a big deal.” Areum reassures with a smile, only to internally slap herself when she realizes she’ll have to order another one later in her shift.

Curse Minghao and yn for being the most precious couple ever.

“Thank you so much, Areum.” Minghao says as he hands her money to cover the cost of the book. She grins, nodding her head as she hands back then leftover change. Once the transaction goes through, Minghao open the book to the first page and clicks the pen.

“Are you going to write a message?” Areum asks, and Minghao nods his head with a small smile on his face. She watches as the words make their way onto the page, and she feels her heart warm when he places the pen back down on the table.

“Thank you so much for letting me buy this. I’m gonna go head to the back with yn, are you gonna join us to read later?” Areum nods her head with a smile, and Minghao shoots her a thumbs up. He turns and walks to the back where you are, and Areum lets out a happy sigh.

“Never thought soulmates could be real until I saw those two.” Areum mutters to herself, chuckling when she hears you let out an awe, most likely due to Minghao handing you the book as a present.

“Maybe I should leave the painting to you, huh?” You say as you take a step back to stare at your canvas, and Minghao hums when he turns around from his own creation to take a look at yours. He lets out a smile at the numerous smiley faces and flowers you painted, thinking that the painting is rather endearing. “I think it looks nice.”

You scoff with a playful grin, pointing over at his painting that numerous different colors, all splattered onto the canvas. You don’t understand how he was able to make paint splatters look beautiful, but this is Xu Minghao we’re talking about. The most talented man you know.

“Says the reincarnated Picasso over here.” You joke, and Minghao rolls his eyes. He places his paintbrush into the cup and walks over to you, wrapping his arms around the back of your shoulders and resting his chin on the top of your head.

“Yours is sweet, it speaks volumes on your personality.” Minghao explains, grinning at the excessive use of yellow. You squint at the painting, turning to glance up at your boyfriend, causing him to smile down at you. “Which is?”

Minghao purses his lips, glancing back at the painting once more to think about his response. He giggles, looking back down at you with a teasing smile on his face.

“Someone who doesn’t know how to paint.” You reach out and slap his stomach, making him double over in laughter as you chuckle in response. Minghao lets out a happy sigh, finally calmed down from his joke as he stands back up at his full height. He leans over and presses a soft kiss to your lips, before pulling away and grinning. “I’m kidding, art is whatever you want it to be. I’ll hang this up in my room when it dries.”

You roll your eyes with a smile, watching as Minghao walks back over to his painting to start cleaning up. You watch as he quietly hums a song to himself, and you let out a content sigh, ignoring the pain in your head in order to enjoy what’s going on in front of you. Minghao feels your eyes on him, and he turns back to see you smiling softly at him.

“Mmm, you’re staring again.” Minghao murmurs as he places the paint tubes back into their container. You shrug your shoulders, a sad smile on your face as you stare at your pretty boyfriend, “I just like seeing you.”

Minghao pauses, a slight blush rising to his cheeks as he proceeds to continue cleaning up. You grin, before turning back to start cleaning up your area as well, grimacing from the growing pain in your head that you’re trying to ignore. Minghao turns and catches sight of the sunlight casting a glow on your face, and he smiles softly.

“I like seeing you too, yn.”

Areum walks over to the front desk, moving to check back in the books that were returned, only to hear the bells of the door. She raises an eyebrow, only to let out a smile when she sees Minghao walking in.

“Hey Minghao! Where’s yn? The two of you haven’t been here for a few months.” Areum says cheerfully, only to feel her heart fall slightly at the sad smile Minghao sends her way. He bites his lip as he walks over and rests his hands on the top of the desk.

His long red hair isn’t styled like it usually is, instead just laying over his forehead. She takes notice of the dark bags under his eyes, and the slight hollowness to his cheeks. Areum opens her mouth to ask if everything’s alright, only to stop when Minghao places the soft yellow book face up on the desk. She stares at the cover, and slowly looks up at Minghao, trying to see if what she’s thinking isn’t true when she locks eyes with the pretty man whose face always held a smile when he was in the library with you.

“Yn’s gone.” Minghao mutters softly, thumb grazing over the letters of the title on the book. Areum clenches her fist tightly together at her side, refusing to believe his words. Minghao bites the inside of his cheek harshly, before pushing the yellow book he bought towards Areum’s direction.

“It’s yours now. Thank you for the kindness you showed yn and I whenever we came here, I know she appreciated it a lot.” Minghao tells Areum, before turning around to walk out. Areum’s eyes widen slightly, and she walks out from behind the desk and stands right behind the tall man.

“W-why does this sound like goodbye? You’re coming back, aren’t you?” Areum asks, eyes frantically searching Minghao’s when he turns to glance at her. He reaches out and softly pats Areum’s shoulder, giving her a smile that no longer holds any light. “Maybe if my second life is kind to me, then I’ll be back.”

And with that, Minghao turns and walks out of the library, leaving Areum to stand there, sadness overcoming her heart as she watches his figure slowly shrink until it disappears.

“His name is Minghao?” Jun asks once Areum finishes the story, and she nods her head, taking a sip of water to fix her parched throat. Jeonghan and Jun share a glance, before turning back towards the librarian. “Did you ever hear from him after that?”

Areum nods her head again, letting out a small smile. “He sent me a letter from Singapore a few years after he left the library, but I learned that he got into a car accident a month prior to when I received it. He passed at an early age, but I’m glad to hear that he was doing alright. It’s been maybe, 25 years since he passed.”

Jeonghan purses his lips, glancing at the book Jun grabbed. He leans forward in the seat, and Areum glances up at him. “We actually have a friend named-”

“I didn’t think you guys would actually go to a library.” The three turn to glance at the sound of the voice, finding Minghao standing at the doorway with a bright smile on his face. Areum’s eyes widen, and she slowly stands up from the couch in shock at the sight.

It’s Minghao, she thinks to herself as she stares at him. His hair is now its natural shade of black, a contrast to his long red hair years ago, but it’s still a similar length. He looks up and locks eyes with Areum, and he tilts his head to the side, a smile still on his face as he bows in her direction. “Hello, I’m Minghao.”

Jun and Jeonghan glance at each other when they see the shocked expression on Areum’s face, and the pieces of the puzzle slowly make their way together when suddenly the bell on the door rings again. The three of them glance at the door, and Minghao slowly turns his head, just to feel his breath get caught in his throat.

Your eyes widen slightly at all the people crowded near the door, and you stop when you realize someone is right in front of you. You glance up and lock eyes with the prettiest man you’ve ever seen, and all the thoughts in your brain disappear at the sight of him. A familiar feeling floods your senses, one that you can only relate to the feeling of coming home.

Unbeknownst to you, Minghao is feeling the exact same thing. Except he feels more emotional as he stares down at you, heart pounding against his chest when he catches the sparkle in your eye.

Areum’s mouth drops open when she sees the exact same scene she saw 35 years ago when you and Minghao first met. Her heart thumps against her chest, and she slowly raises her hand until it rests against her heart as she stares at the two of you.

“You look familiar, have we met before?” You ask in a small voice, letting out a smile when you catch sight of the redness to his ears. Minghao clears his throat, smiling when he sees the brightness to your eyes. “I was going to ask you the same thing.”

The two of you stare at each other for a moment longer, before you extend your hand in his direction. You tilt your head to the side with a shy smile on your face, “Hi, I’m yn.”

Minghao bites the inside of his cheek, grinning when he reaches out and grasps your hand. He feels warmth flood his features at the contact, finding you both beautiful, and familiar. It’s as if he’s experiencing deja vu when he says, “Hi, I’m Minghao.”

Jun and Jeonghan turn and look at the soft yellow book resting on the table, and Jun let's out a breathless chuckle. He runs his hand over the title, smiling when he looks back towards you and Minghao.

“His second life. He found you again in his second life.”

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xthecaptainssaviorx · 3 years ago

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Okay, so I said I’ll try to put my thoughts on the tv series down when I have time and after reading the first book again before I watched the series and spent the day after reading the other two books again too, I feel like I can try and do this now. Be warned though, this will be very long.

Overall, I liked the tv series a lot. To a certain point, I was convinced it was pretty much perfect but then some of the changes got too messy for my taste.

Up until episode three, I was really in love with this adaptation. I can say, there are changes they made that I loved, some that I liked, and some that I didn’t like and perhaps even found myself being disappointed with.

I really adore the cast. I think the casting of our main characters is top-notch. While I was hesitant when the casting of our main boys was announced, I’m positively surprised with both Gavin and Christopher because they are perfect as Jeremiah and Conrad and did a really great job with bringing the boys to life.

Personally I never really minded that Belly and Steven were changed to Asian characters and I don’t think I was ever worried or disappointed about Lola as Belly because she just always had the right vibe to me. I can’t really explain it but with the boys’ casting, I was like, eh I need to see them in action to decide if I like them or not but I never had that with Lola. When she was announced as Belly, she just fit.

I am SO glad, they decided to keep Steven around and give him a bigger role in the tv show. We never really had that in the books and I’m glad they changed it.

I’m unsure how I feel about them changing the back flashes from the book to the current timeline in the show. I mean I get why that would be easier but it felt off to me sometimes. Too much of the years-long pining was put into the same summer. Maybe that’s what it is.

I equally love and hate how petty and immature Belly is at some points, especially when it comes to Conrad. Hate because while reading it often made me cringe, Love because they kept it accurate to the books

I especially loved the moments that were true to the book. Like, those were my favorite moments

While the soundtrack is incredible, no doubt, I often felt as though the popular songs playing for important scenes took away from the actual scene. It took the spotlight. So I wish they would have dialed that down a bit.

I am MAD and so disappointed that they already explained the infinity necklace meaning. And that Belly already has it now. It’s such a huge, important thing in all of the books and in the Conrad/Belly relationship that I am genuinely mad they didn’t wait. And the fact that Belly was drunk during that scene made it even worse. Them using that scene now took away the whole build-up and emotional drama. It’s such a huge deal, with such big meaning and I can't believe they just washed over like that in the show. I can't even get over it.

So with them changing and already using so many things from book two, I am a bit worried about how the second season will continue if I’m being honest.

Junior Mint! I wish they would have explained his meaning. I really do. They should have explained this situation rather than ruining the necklace situation.

I thought it was so odd that Belly basically had three different boys in the tv show, pretty much at the same time.

I hate the fact that they made her hook up with Jeremiah and suddenly made her have feelings for him. Because in the book that came much slower. Jere confessed his feelings, knowing that she was very much in love with his brother and when that was confirmed by Belly he backed off. More out of hurt but yeah I wish they would have kept it that way.

The whole Jeremiah/Belly thing was so unnecessarily rushed in season one and I really wish they would have waited and given it more time to develop in season two instead. Because for me that just made it super unbelievable. How will they change their relationship now?

#tsitp tv series #tsitp spoilers #the summer i turned pretty spoilers #the summer i turned pretty #tsitp season 1

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organic-guacamole · 4 years ago

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I've got a lot of thoughts on this finale.

starting with the length.

27 minutes? really?

I'm not asking for a 2 hour episode but cmon, at least give us something closer to 40 minutes.

next, the characters

the characters just didn't feel like themselves, especially portwell.

all season long we saw how much potential they had, how well communicated they were, how good they were at being a proper, healthy couple, and now they just can't talk to each other?

it doesn't feel like them.

portwell had arguably the best set up of all the other ships, they showed us how good they had the potential to be only to throw in a cheap plot to wrap it up? I would understand that they want some angst to make the ending all the more satisfying, but this was pathetic.

there I said it.

of all the ways to add drama in a ship, don't use the one that completely contradicts their entire development.

paired with the length of the episode, it seemed even more poorly written.

here I made a lovely, handy dandy homemade graph to represent how I see portwell's storyline:

as i said before, we saw the build up being nearly perfect. they peaked during episodes 9-11 because they just had the chemistry, the communication, and the most potential to be the endgame couple.

they just got eachother.

then we get Jamie popping in for 10 seconds and erasing a lot of that, only for mediator Ashlyn to jump in and solve their problems.

then there's the "kiss".

I know that Sofia is underage and that even if she/her legal guardians consent to the kiss, the writers can still decide not to show it, but still. In my opinion, if you're not going to show the kiss, then don't bother.

there are other ways to establish a relationship that would work better in this situation. Of course if they get together they'll have to kiss sometime, but one way they could postpone it is by having Gina be a bit more reluctant to give away her first kiss like that. it could also show how accomodating EJ is.

I like to think that Gina is very meticulous when making decisions so she'll probably want to be very sure of the relationship before giving him her first kiss. perhaps she'd stick to cheek kisses until she's ready, and then she kisses him and he's surprised.

that would've been, in my opinion, a sufficient way to hold off the kiss while still wrapping up portwell until season 3 when Sofia would be 18 (assuming they get picked up for S3 this summer then start filming fall-winter. Sofia will be 18 in January).

as my friend @rtcosley (idk why it's not letting me tag them, so their page is linked) said,

"They created like 10 plots

And instead of wrapping it up

They added 4 more"

there's just so much more they could've done...it's the season finale for crying out loud.

I get that seblos already had (what I assume is) their storyline for the season, the fight and resolution. Ignoring the fact that that only lasted for 2 episodes and didn't have anything to do with what we were expecting, (i.e.the financial differences between their families, as mentioned in episode 1, the fact that everyone treats seb like he's stupid, this being carlos' first show and the drama that the stress of that caused, etc.), seblos had to purpose this episode than to stand next to eachother and be gay.

I get that they're not part of the core four or anything, but the poster for season 2 has all of them, as opposed to season 1 just being the core four.

They deserved better, just like redlyn and kowie.

redlyn's arc was pretty early in the season compared to the other ships. they had Ashlyn confessing her insecurities in episode 3, antoine stirring the pot of confusion and causing a bit of distance between them briefly, and then big red confessing his goals and plans for the future in episode 8 and for the rest of it, we just see them getting closer and more comfortable with each other and caring about each other more and more.

they had a good arc together.

but that's just it. I wanted to see them have their own arcs. but then again, this show can't seem to balance multiple storylines. I think it is possible, but not when they keep adding new characters that don't contribute anything much to the story(more on that later).

kowie's storyline is... confusing.

I really like their dynamic, how carefree and happy Kourtney gets around him, how she's remaining true to herself and managing a million and one things, plus a relationship in her own without losing herself to it all.

but the main issue I have is that the entire development was never shown.

we went from strangers, to coworkers, to friends that flirt, to lovers that text constantly and went on numerous dates (and Howie met her mother at some point). but all of that, was off screen.

it's like the writers made every episode with them in it kind of thrown in at a new stage of relationship progression and said "here, accept this, no questions asked because we don't have answers"

I just wish we could've seen more of howie trying to get in her good side again after episode 7 because it seems like that's when a lot of it happened.

I appreciate the Rini scene in this episode, seems to be the very end of them, for good this time.

i'm happy about that.

Ricky especially deserves to be free for a while to focus on his development, and Nini has the chance now to really shine through her talents and make a name for herself.

The Rini storyline is the only one I'm fully satisfied with.

now, that being said;

what the heck are they trying to pull with Lily and Ricky rn???

just like that.

after lily being the villain this whole season, they're just gonna not redeem her and then have her confess her feelings to Ricky, a guy she barely knows and only talked to to harass and intimidate, and for him to reject her publicly then call her afterwards?

please I hope it's just to say "you dropped something, here it is and never contact me again, thanks." /hj

speaking of the villains, this season was promoted as the season of rivalry between North and East High right? so why did that plot idea only progress in about 3 out if 12 episodes?

we got Zackey Roy in there for a few episodes then he disappeared, Lily just caused Gina to stay true to her friends in episode 2 and 7 and then basically did nothing else?

this is what I mean by the new characters providing nothing to the show.

the writers can't manage having so many characters and plots at once so they start so many promising arcs, only to kick them aside later on.

we already know that the first half of the season felt like filler episodes, so I think they could've cut those down to leave room for the more important plots to take root, rather than have them pop up and get rushed at the end of the season.

all that, and they just add 4 more plots at the end of the season.

this post sounds very negative looking back...but if I'm being honest with myself, I'm just very very disappointed.

I love this show so much and I really expected better for the season finale, especially if they don't know if it's getting renewed or not.

given the IMDB ratings of this episode so far, I don't have very high expectations for the renewal, but I'm still hopeful because this show is a great thing, one of the best things that happened to me over the course of this quarantine. I've become so attached to this show, the cast and the friends I made through it, that I don't know what I would do if it just ends like this. writing these reviews and posts about this season has been so fun for me to do and thinking that this may be the very last one is a painful thought.

I'm sorry if you were expecting this post to be as light-hearted as my other posts about the episodes, I just had a lot to say about this episode in particular.

all my episode posts are tagged with "#guac's episode text blocks :)" in case you wanna read through and reminisce the simpler times🥲

#it got kinda cheesy at the end there oops #i love this fandom so much #i cant imagine if we dont get s3 #hsmtmts #hsmtmts s2 #hsmtmts season 2 #hsmtmts season 2 finale #hsmtmts spoilers #guac's episode text blocks :)

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yurimother · 5 years ago

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LGBTQ Game Review - A Summer’s End – Hong Kong 1986

Before diving into the meat of Oracle and Bone’s A Summer’s End, I want to talk about the women behind this game Tida Kietsungden, and Charissa So. So and Kietsungden have done nothing but impress me since the announcement of A Summer’s End. They have repeatedly demonstrated their immense effort and dedication to creating a beautiful and thoughtful experience. Through conversations with the studio and reading their blog entries, I gained a remarkable understanding of how this game is both a tribute to classic cinema and a love letter to the Yuri and LGBT community. Through careful research and thoughtful expression, the two women navigate and acknowledge complicated issues, including Asian LGBTQ history and Hong Kong’s delicate political situation with grace and maturity. I am in complete awe of both women and their work. However, regardless of my profound respect for these creators, I still endeavor to offer my unfiltered thoughts on the visual novel, giving praise and criticism where appropriate.

A Summer’s End – Hong Kong 1986 is a Yuri visual novel set, as you may have figured out, in Hong Kong in the year 1986. The game follows a young office worker, Michelle (Fong Ha) Cheung, who has a chance encounter with a free-spirited woman named Sam (Ka Yan) Wong. Both women feel drawn to each other, and the game explores this mutual attraction and the budding relationship which emerges from it.

This plot follows the standard girl meets girl story that has permeated the Yuri genre for the past several decades. Like most Yuri stories, the older and more experienced woman, Sam, is rebellious and beautiful, with long dark hair and a dominating persona. Michelle, although far more naive in the ways of love, breaks the trend of this trope by being the more sullen of the two. I would have liked to see the game diverge a bit more from the standard story of the genre. Fortunately, A Summer’s End is a romance story between adults who do not work together, setting it apart from the norms. It even includes a coming out section that creates a more robust LGBT identity than any tale of temporary schoolgirl love.

The story is well put together and well presented. The story is told primarily from Michelle’s perspective. It mostly takes place over a few days, during which Michelle engages in a whirlwind romance with Sam. This story features the struggle between her feelings and passion and her devotion to tradition and her mother. The progression of her affection is unrealistically fast. The story feels a bit rushed, and many of the societal and personal quagmires the game stumbles upon are not sufficiently developed or confronted. Had the game indulged in a more prolonged and tumultuous struggle for Michelle, conclusions would have felt much sweeter, and the story would have gone from good to great.

Even with this massive missed opportunity, there are plenty of exemplary moments and aspects of the narrative. The game pulls no punches addressing Michelle’s slightly overbearing mother and the conflict between the two. It would have been incredibly simple to take the easy route on this one. Still, the developers stuck to their guns and manage to explore a challenging situation satisfyingly, all while keeping the characters realistic and sympathetic. In fact, every scene relating to LGBT rights and history is flawlessly executed.

There are also some fantastic chapters, including a thrilling but refreshing bike ride and a flashback scene that recontextualizes certain events from another perspective. The many references and allusions to classic cinema including some older lesbian films and plenty of Asian works, are particularly noteworthy. However, the best part of A Summer’s End by far is the setting.

The location and time period is intrinsic to Sam and Michelle’s tale, as it is shaped by and reflects contemporary culture and LGBTQ rights. Oracle and Bone create a vibrant and lively world, a jaw-dropping depiction of Hong Kong in the 1980s. Everything helps feed into the creation of this world, including a fantastic and retro UI, small touches such as a Cantonese subway announcement, and objects encountered like a disposable camera help convey a strong sense of the period. However, the soundtrack sells it more than any other element, save perhaps the artwork, transporting the player to the era. While a few tracks are the standard easy listening affairs one expects from visual novels, there are tons of excellent city pop and disco beats, complete with plenty of synths and confidence! Finally, a visual novel soundtrack that contributes more than just background noise!

Sadly, the game’s dialogue choice system and branching paths are far more of a hindrance than a help. I can honestly say that the game would play better and be way more enjoyable as a kinetic novel. Most choices feel inconsequential, changing nothing of the story and resulting in almost the exact same response from other characters yet, they have a hidden points system. If you do not earn enough points, parts of the optional adult content will be unplayable until one goes back to find the right choice. I spent several hours replaying, and eventually skipping through, the game to unlock all the scenes, and finally gave up with one CG left unseen. The only choice with any actual effect is painfully evident in its consequences. One option leads to the bad ending, which is well written, but no reasonable player would go down that path unless they just wanted to see the whole game. The second unveils the true good ending, which no player in their right mind would not pursue, as again, the choice is obvious and adds nothing to the game. There is no reason to put in an alternative ending or tedious dialogue choice.

The characters in A Summer’s End are well constructed. Sam is adventurous without being obnoxious and has a mature though appropriately unrefined demeanor. Michelle is extremely curt and somewhat distant, although she displays a sharp wit and more timid nature on occasion. Both women participate in engaging, deep, and thoughtful discussions, often with each other, although sometimes internally, and thus feel well developed and complex. Unfortunately, their chemistry, while not absent, is not enough to sell the whirlwind romance. There is insufficient expression of their feelings and attractions, both internally or through dialogue and actions, so their inevitable closeness feels unearned.

However, even in the short game, both characters change with each other, especially Michelle, as she becomes more affectionate, confident, and caring. She begins to embody some of Sam’s warmness while never losing herself. Some of my favorite dialogue and interaction came from her towards the end of the game, although I will not spoil it. Additionally, side characters have a strong presence thanks to their firmly established characteristics and a profound effect on the narrative. Each has their own sprite and mannerisms, helping cement them as fixtures in A Summer’s End rather than tacked on assets.

The visual novel contains optional adult content, which is installed in an extra patch and can be toggled on and off. I played through the game with and without it and can happily report that the story is just as fulfilling and complete without it. Although the unlockable nature of these scenes is aggravating, they are very well written and sensual without being exploitative. There were moments I did not care for as much, such as Sam getting carried away at one point, but it felt very realistic and incredibly sensual. The artwork in these sexual encounters is some of the best in the game, embracing darker colors and showcasing intense desire.

Speaking of the artwork, it is stupendous. The game is bright and striking, with amazing backgrounds complete with luminous neon signs, glaring televisions, and life and activity oozing from every corner. The backgrounds are so beautiful and detailed they could effectively serve in place of CG art, although there is plenty of that asides. The character models and designs are similarly excellent, with expressive poses and faces. The various outfits, of which the game has many, embody iconic 80’s fashion. Artist Tida Kietsungden draws both the characters and CGs with a distinctive hand-drawn style, which allows them to play well off each other and add to the beautiful presentation. The detail and care that went into the aesthetics are enormous and elevate the game at every moment.

A Summer’s End – Hong Kong 1986 is a vibrant and intimate experience. The fantastic setting and flawless artwork surround a compelling and thoughtful story about lesbian love and desire, societal expectations, and the bonds between family and lovers. It is rough around the edges, with a slightly rushed story that leaves little time to wallow in complexity and an awful dialogue system. However, it will win players over with its striking presentation and sophisticated subject matter. I look forward to more from this studio and highly recommend you check this game out!

Ratings: Story – 7 Characters – 6 Art – 10 Music – 8 LGBTQ – 8 Sexual Content – 3 (8 with patch) Final – 7

Purchase A Summer’s End on Steam and itch.io, available April 23

Consider supporting Yuri news, reviews, and content on the YuriMother Patreon

#Yuri #lgbt #lgbtq #lgbtq+#queer #gay #reivew #a summer's end #hong kong #girls love #gl #wlw #lesbian #visual novel #games #video games #gaming #manga #anime #reviews

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dancedance-resolution · 4 years ago

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andi mack friendom, are you interested in some more thoughts about my andi mack / american girl crossover (which is actually just a thinly veiled info dump about american girl history and drama)? if so, you're in the right place!

the andi / buffy / cyrus doll set i designed would be a contemporary line.

CONTEXT (forewarning, this is basically just an ag info dump about the 2017 contemporary line) (also, tagging @kirstensleepey because i think this write up might be useful for the ag project you're working on <3):

so in 2017, american girl did a brand new thing. they released 3 dolls who were contemporary characters but not girls of the year. (prior to these dolls' release, which are called "the contemporary line" by the ag fandom, the only categories of ag dolls were historicals, girls of the year, and just like yous.)

the contemporary line was controversial for many reasons.

first, we have our main character, tenney grant. (tenney is basically taylor swift as a doll, if taylor were uncool and a r*publican lol.)

one of the reasons why tenney is so controversial is that she overshadowed the girl of the year (henceforth abbreviated as goty) 2017, gabriella mcbride.

tenney was released only one month after gabriella's release. ag's social media gave much more focus to tenney than gabriella. upon tenney's release, gabriella's store displays were downsized (which is unheard of for a goty). tenney even had a larger collection than gabriella!

why are we mad about tenney overshadowing gabriella? well, gabriella was ag's first (and as of 2021, ONLY) black goty. also, gabriella was ag's first doll to have an explicity confirmed disability - her stutter.

BRIEF INTERMESSION - SOME STATISTICS ABOUT DIVERSITY IN CHARACTER DOLLS:

only 7 out of the 22 total historical characters have been dolls of color. only 3 out of 22 historicals have been black (one of which is now retired). only 2 out of 22 have been aapi (one of these dolls, ivy, was just a best friend doll and is now retired; and the other doll, nanea, has a problematic face mold. i wrote an essay about why her facemold is problematic here!). only 1 historical doll, josefina, is hispanic, and ag has actually misspelled her name as "josephina" on their social media before.

only 1 doll EVER has been native american, kaya'aton'my, who is a historical character from 1764. (not even any of the just like you dolls have had kaya's face mold! kaya is truly the only indigenous doll!) in fact, ag has had more colonizer characters than indigenous characters. felicity and elizabeth are white character dolls from 1776, and their books fail to address the issues surrounding colonization and treatment of native americans. and kirsten is a swedeish immigrant to wisconsin in 1854. her book does acknowledge the existence of native americans, and kirsten has an indigenous friend named singing bird. (i haven't read kirsten's books and i'm not indigenous, so i can't comment on this storyline.) ag actually had a controversy about kirsten just this year - in 2021, the t-shirt design for kirsten said "settlers gonna settle", and ag actually ended up changing the design to "cabin sweet cabin" after backlash.

moving on to the girl of the year line - out of 21 goty dolls, gabriella is the ONLY black goty. only 6 out of 21 gotys have been dolls of color. there have been 2 hispanic characters (luciana, who is generally regarded as an excellent doll; and marisol, who is controversial because her book talks about how her family moved from pilsen chicago - a real area of chicago that is home to many hispanic immigrants - to a white suburb due to crime. this storyline involves racist stereotypes.) also, goty 2016 lea clark (slightly tan skin, blonde hair, light green eyes) is 1/8th brazilian, and some brazilian ag fans consider the emphasis on lea being 1/8th brazilian racial feticization. next, there have been 3 aapi gotys. one of these dolls, sonali, was one of two best friend dolls for chrissa (goty 2009) - yep, you heard that right, yet another doll of color that is a side character! sonali is the bully in chrissa's books, but she gets a redemption arc. to this day, sonali is ag's only south asian character doll. [additionally, there has been some criticism that all of the aapi gotys are mixed race - jess mcconell (goty 2006) has a japanese mother and an irish/scottish father, kanani akina (goty 2011) has a french/german mother and a japanese/hawaiian father, and sonali matthews has an indian mother and a father of unknown race/ethincity. perhaps notably, the only aapi historical doll who is not currently retired (nanea) is also mixed race (hawaiian mother and scottish father).]

as for the disability thing i mentioned - ag also has a disappointing track record regarding disability representation, lol. it was very lightly implied that mckenna (goty 2012) had a learning disability, but that was never confirmed. mckenna's tutor, who used a wheelchair, was ag's first big disability rep, but she was just a side character in mckenna's story. then, many ag fans were disappointed when mary ellen, a historical character released in 2015, was able-bodied (in canon, she had polio as a child, so it would make sense for mary ellen to be disabled and use mobility aids). finally, in 2020, goty joss gave us some disability rep - she has a hearing aid.

ag's lack of disability rep is very frustrating, especially considering that doll companies, like our generation, have made some really cool disabled dolls. and ag has been doing this ad campaign with the paralympics that feels performative to me - like, they want to seem inclusive by featuring dolls with prostetic legs, but they don't even sell dolls like that!!!

lastly, religious diversity - iirc, there are three jewish dolls (rebecca, goty 2001/2002 lindsey, and goty 2009 chrissa). the rest of the dolls are either christian or of unspecified religion. there has never been an explicitly muslim, hindu, or buddhist doll, or a doll who is a member of any religion other than judaism/christianity/unspecified. (there is some hope that we might get a muslim doll, though, since an outfit with a hijab was leaked, and ag trademarked a persian name that i can't recall off the top of the head at my moment. but take these with a grain of salt - ag trademarks a ton of stuff that they don't use, and the leak could be false or just a truly me outfit.)

END OF INTERMISSION - BACK TO THE TENNEY/GABRIELLA CONTROVERSY:

so, we get our first black goty, and she's being totally overshadowed by tenney.

here's where a conspiracy comes in:

we can track when ag trademarks their character names. goty names are usually trademarked early in the year prior to their release (by may). but gabriella mcbride wasn't trademarked until october, iirc.

and gabriella is a very underdeveloped character in comparison to most gotys. one of her main hobbies - dancing - was the same main hobby as both marisol (goty 2005) and isabelle (goty 2014). her store displays were underemphasized in comparison to tenney's, as i mentioned before. she was the first goty who didn't get a movie in six years (since kanani, goty 2011). and gabriella didn't even have a big ticket accessory item available until summer!

so, we get our first black goty, and she's underdeveloped, underemphasized, seems to have been rushed (due to her trademark date), and overshadowed by tenney just one month after her release. why is that?

well, some people think that tenney was actually supposed to be goty 2017! (i agree)

tenney was trademarked earlier, had more development, had a bigger collection, etc. we think that tenney was supposed to be goty 2017, but ag decided to do a doll of color (gabriella) at the last minute. (keep in mind the climate of 2015/2016 - ag probably wanted some clout for doing a black goty, and they also probably heard the ag fandom's demands for more dolls of color.)

so that's tenney.

next we have logan everett. logan was ag's first boy character doll. i'm glad that ag had a boy character doll, but logan kinda missed the mark for me. the main source of controversy surrounding logan is his face mold: he, a white boy, uses the kaya face mold. !! it kinda felt like a slap in the face to many indigenous ag fans - kaya is literally The Only Doll with the kaya face mold, and when we finally get another doll with her face mold, he's not even indigenous.

lastly, we have z yang my beloved <3. z yang was done dirty - she is yet another doll of color who is a mere side character, and also, she was available for only a total of 20 months before being retired!

so, that's everything i have to say about the 2017 contemporary line.

now i'm going to talk about the 2021 contemporary line :3

so, it's summer 2020. the black lives matter is becoming more mainstream. brands are now getting clout for appearing "woke."

so, admist this climate, ag is (as always) facing demands from its fandom/collectors to diversify its doll line. so they announce that they're going to be doing a new contemporary line, to be released in "the second half of 2021"!!!! and they promise that the contemporary line will have a black lead character

fast forward to modern day. thanks to ag's trademarks, we can safely assume that the new contemporary line will be called "world by us." we can safely assume that the line will have 3 characters. the 3 characters all live in washington dc and are best friends :) we can safely assume that the characters will be maritza ochoa, evette peeters, and makena williams. i talked about makena and maritza on that ask regrettable-username sent me about my andi mack/ag headcanons! personally, i'm excited for world by us, and i think it has a lot of potential!

alright sawyer, that's the end of the ag info dump fhjhdhfskf.

now for my andi mack friends:

i think the andi/buffy/cyrus line would be structured similar to world by us: andi is the main character, and buffy and cyrus are her best friend dolls :) all 3 dolls would be released at the same time. andi would have 3 books that have buffy and cyrus as side characters, and buffy and cyrus would have one book each.

the big ticket item for this collection would be andi's andi shack. i'm imagining its design sort of like kira's tent mixed with lanie's camper mixed with blaire's farm. andi the walls of andi shack would open up so that when it's fully opened, the four walls are on an even plane with the back wall and extended out like wings. you remove the roof before opening up the walls. the shack is tall enough that the doll can comfortably stand up even with the roof still attached, and wide enough that all three dolls (andi, buffy, and cyrus) can comfortably stand next to each other inside of andi shack.

andi shack would come with a ton of craft supplies inside of it. it would also come with a little flower box that has cece's african violets, like blaire's flower box. (thanks to regrettable-username for coming up with the african violets idea fdjfsj.)

alright i have to go now, so these are all my andi mack/ag thoughts for now, but i might be back later with more thoughts fhdfjs (hopefully not though, since typing this out took me over three hours [sweating emoji]).

sorry for any typos and sorry for how scatterbrained this is! also this may have some forgotten things/mildly incorrect things bc my only source is my brain (and a photo of all the dolls so i can count how many dolls for the statistics portion) and my brain is not the most reliable thing on earth lol.

#long post #american girl dolls #i feel kinda bad about putting this in the andi mack tag since it's mostly ag related; but it does include info about my andi mack/ag au #and the friendom has seemed to be really enjoying the andi mack/ag au (nostalgia i guess) so uhhh hopefully you guys will enjoy this? lol #andi mack

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mnictasbcl · 4 years ago

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I’ll be forever young (with you)

For #dbhcolorsofdeviancy, prompt:

June 13th: Forever young @connor-sent-by-cyberlife

Rating: Teen

Characters: Connor, Hank Anderson, Sumo

Relationships: Connor & Hank Anderson, Connor & Hank Anderson & Sumo

Additional Tags: Fluff, Birthday, First birthday, Presents, Detroit bridge, Swearing, Hank is the best dad

Summary: August 15th, 2039. Connor’s first birthday.

He doesn’t think Hank will do anything that big for his birthday…

And is proven very wrong.

(The final prompt for this event! I’ve enjoyed it very much :) )

Story below! Or, read it on AO3

AUGUST 15th, 2039

TIME AM 07:40:02

Connor awoke to a ball of brown and white fur catapulting itself onto his bed.

Opening his eyes and fully coming out of the stasis, he realised that this was Sumo.

He ran his hands over his soft fur, receiving the wet slobbery kisses over his face, smiling. The Saint Bernard seemed particularly affectionate and excitable, the reason why eluding him as he was distracted by the fluffy cuddles.

But then, finally pulling himself away from the great dog and scanning his surroundings, he found out the reason pretty quickly.

Loosely strapped upon Sumo’s head was a colourful party hat, the words ‘Happy Birthday!’ printed on it in bold letters. Deducing that it wasn’t Hank’s birthday, it wasn’t Sumo’s…

The only other person in the house was him.

He chuckled, moving to pull the hat off the dog but he grumbled and jumped off the bed before he could do so.

“I didn’t think you’d find that comfortable, Sumo.”

The only reply he was given was a snort as the dog sniffed at the floor, nosing slowly out of his bedroom.

Connor shrugged. It made sense. It was a year since his activation day. Strangely… he did recall Hank paying extra attention and asking questions when he had mentioned he was almost a year old since being activated.

But he hadn’t viewed it as a birthday. Merely the day after his testing was complete and he was finally activated and shipped out on the same day for his first mission.

Of course, with the development of android rights, birthdays had been allowed for androids, even encouraged. Markus had celebrated his, he remembered, as he’d created a painting for him as a gift. So had various other members of Jericho.

Still, it felt… different to view this as a human celebration, of him turning a year old. The body he was in was technically not even a year old because he’d fallen off the rooftop on his first mission. He shuddered. It hadn’t been a brilliant day of birth, if humans called it that, that was for sure.

However, with help from people like Hank and Markus, he was beginning to accept his new humanity. Perhaps embracing his birthday would allow him to really move into the next stage of his life.

Besides, it wasn’t like Hank would do anything massive for the day, right?

He walked out of his room and was met with balloons tied to the curtain poles, a banner proclaiming ‘Happy birthday/activation day, Connor!’, presents piled up on the living room table and Hank standing at the kitchen counter, a birthday hat askew on his head.

“Here comes the birthday boy.” Hank chuckled as he walked in, taking in his bewildered expression. “I know I probably went a bit… a lot extreme on this, but it’s your first birthday. You got to have a nice first birthday.”

Connor continued to scan over the room. “It’s…”

“I know.” He took a step towards him. “I know you’re still getting used to all your new-fangled emotions. But this doesn’t have to be big and stressful. Just a nice day where you can open some gifts and eat cake.”

He quirked a brow. “Did someone buy me a biological stomach, Lieutenant?”

“Smartass. Fine, I’ll eat cake. You can watch and drink a thirium pouch.”

Connor nodded. That didn’t sound too different. He followed Hank into the living room, sitting beside him on the couch.

“Alright…” Hank hummed as he looked over the gifts. “We’ve got a few things- a lot of things- from your friends at Jericho. One or two from the guys at the DPD… and me and Sumo piled some stuff together.”

Connor looked over it all with confusion, hands reaching out before pausing, reassessing. Eventually, he looked over to Hank for help.

“What… exactly do I do?”

Hank smiled. “They’re for you. Open whichever you want, but make sure Sumo doesn’t eat the wrapping paper.” He threw a slightly dirty look at the dog who was laying in front of the table, waiting. Sumo glared back at him.

Connor nodded. That sounded reasonable. Picking up the first gift, which was from Markus, he found even the tingle of excitement building in his chest, wondering with gratitude what his loved ones had chosen for him.

Markus had gotten him a book about fish, along with a selection of classical piano sheet music for him to play. Seeing the care put in, the thought about what he was interested in… was touching.

Tearing through the next few gifts elicited the same feeling. Everything was so thoughtful, even the Saint Bernard plush Sumo had ‘bought’ for him.

“Full of himself.” Hank jerked a thumb fondly at the dog when he opened the gift.

“It is very sweet, Sumo. Perhaps not as good as the real deal…” He bent down to scratch behind the dog’s ears. “But very cute, thank you.”

After everything was placed neatly back on the table, he thought they were finished. But Hank looked to him and proclaimed:

“Okay. I have one last gift for you…”

Connor tilted his head. “But I appreciated the things you have already gotten for me, Lieutenant. They were very generous.”

“This isn’t a thing.” He replied, getting up off the chair. “Come on, follow me.”

The android was intrigued as he was led out to the car. Sumo was put in the back, so he assumed it couldn’t be another vacation or they would have left him with the neighbours.

Still, it seemed like Hank wished this to be a surprise, so he looked down at the mini Sumo plush he had brought with him, stroking his fingers over the soft fabric. He chuckled to hear Sumo whining with jealousy from the back.

Connor managed to distract himself as such until the car pulled to a stop. Looking up, he found they were in the park.

Hank strode ahead of him once Sumo was on the leash, and he hurried to catch up. It didn’t seem like they were in the mood for sightseeing today, the scenery rushing by as Hank continued on.

But, just as Connor was about to inquire where they were going, he found himself at a familiar place. Looking out over the Detroit bridge.

Hank sat down on the bench, holding Sumo’s leash and patting the spot beside him for the dog to hop up.

“I remember this place.” Connor mused, standing beside the bench. Earlier in the day now, he didn’t look out at the stars twinkling overhead but instead the crisp summer sky. “You almost shot me here.”

Hank laughed. “If that’s what you’re asking; no, I’m not going to shoot you. That would be a shit birthday present.”

“It would indeed be rather unpleasant.”

“And illegal.” Hank added. “But… that is partly the reason I brought you here. Not the almost shooting thing. Maybe just the… almost.” He sighed.

“I wasn’t even gonna think about it; you were getting on my nerves, there was too much going on in my head… I was just going to shoot you. But then- you didn’t kill those tracis. And you stood there and told me you were afraid to die. This was the first place I realised that you were actually alive… and all the better for it, otherwise, where would we be now?”

Connor mulled it over. If Hank had shot him, it would have… well, severely halted the growth of their relationship.

“But I don’t want to think about that.” Hank continued on. “I didn’t shoot you. You had a heart. And now it’s your first birthday. In that year, you helped the leader of the android revolution… You pulled me out of whatever rut I’d fallen into. And honestly? I couldn’t see my life without you right now, son.”

Connor glanced to Hank as he paused. He didn’t comment on the way his voice had choked up, instead placing a hand gently on his shoulder, a sign of comfort.

“It’s really helped me, living not on my own again—no offense, Sumo. But just having someone in the house, you… Even if you are a pain in my ass sometimes.” He chuckled.

“What I’m trying to say is… Well, I know you’ve got your whole life ahead of you. A long life. A life where you’ll always look like that, where you’ll be forever young- and a while from now, you’ll be living a new life, without—” he looked up to Connor. “But right now, where we are? I like that. I don’t want it to go away. So that’s why…”

It appeared Hank had hit his quota for sappiness, as he simply held out a piece of paper to Connor wordlessly.

Connor took it off him, quickly scanning over it. It was a form. Official looking, with Hank’s signature at the bottom, and room for his…

“An adoption form?”

“If it’s too much, just tell me. I don’t want you thinking I’m some clingy old man but—”

He handed it back to Hank, his signature printed on it. “Thank you… dad.” The word was strange. It wasn’t likely he’d always use it- but the meaning then, the feeling it brought… it was the best birthday present he could have asked for.

Hank smiled back to him. “Great. Now, what about we get out of here? The view’s pretty, but it’s gonna get hot as hell later in the day and that cake back at home isn’t going to eat itself.”

Connor followed after him, back to the car. “Of course. I have heard, however, about this new android update which can install human mechanics such as eating…”

“I’m not saving you any fuckin’ cake, Connor. It’ll go old.”

“Like you?”

Connor wouldn’t have it any other way. The small moments of genuine affection and feelings let out into the air… The regular day-to-day life of working at the DPD and bantering with Hank… Being forever young, one day, that all might end. But for now, he would live in the moment, and he would embrace it. All the emotions that would come with deviancy, whether good or bad, or even a mixture of both… He couldn’t ask for a better Lieutenant turned father-figure to help him through it.

#dbhcolorsofdeviancy #dbh #detroit become human #dbh connor #dbh hank #dbh connor and hank #dbh fanfic #fanfic

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