#And probably terrified and in pain...
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how can she escape so easily?
#deltarune#deltarune chapter 4#deltarune chapter 3#deltarune fanart#art#fanart#weird route#snowgrave#susie deltarune#kris deltarune#deltarune spoilers#one of the working titles for this was from an imaginary indie rock artist named “dreamer dreamer”#“so keen to beating the system that you even managed to beat my own (that i've known for so long)”#i think a lot about that one “dialogue choice” where it's just the heart in the middle with two blank options#with susie in the rain (until the rain stops when the choice comes up)#for a split second after#susie's sprite clips over kris's and it makes kris look like they have a terrifying face to the point where i thought it was like#an intentional jumpscare#in my mind. refusing to do what the soul wants causes burning pain#i feel like a lot in 3/4 there's more opportunities not only to be mean to ralsei but also to susie#she seeks to defy what's set out for her i like this about her a lot actually#hope she wins#wonder what the “trance down” for the twisted sword item means if thorn ring inflicts trance (probably up)
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[He leans into the touch, repeating those same thoughts...But what if, this time, it's different? The technology here..it could be possible..]
Maybe a different kind of experiment...?
[Labs!Rainbow appears on the cold floor, disoriented and frightened...in a flash, he's alert and on his fingers again. This place...is nothing like Viridis' home...]
*The place he's in is a hallway with white tile floor and white painted walls. The lights are far too bright. The air is cold. It smells of cleaning products, chemicals and blood...*
*... its a lab.*
#We could have it temporarily work..#He could be sent back to Viridis (temporarily) resteved#And probably terrified and in pain...#Aaand at some point ✨️magic shenanigans ✨️ happen and he gets turned back to a pickaxe#<- prev#thanks to the rules of the au#rainbow will be sent back to the twa universe as a pickaxe-#and i mean#rainbow is y e a r n i n g for it so. why not? :)
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I got caught up in stuff so wasn’t on time for valentines so I offer you up a meme
slight explanation: in one of events/singularities they found flowers that bloom bright vivid red the more blood you feed those flowers, and if you think about someone you really love, all the dopamine/serotonin/etc in your blood makes them even more vivid and turns petals into sweet edible ones, it’s basically a bouquet and a box of chocolate in one go and yea count never does things in half is he
#fate grand order#fgo#antonio salieri#edmond dantes#edsali#count is so fucking extra even if it costs him his life#man spent hours feeding his blood to flowers to make them sweetest and brightest so salieri can enjoy them#salieri is probably extremely touched but also terrified#all I can offer are memes or pain what do u expect
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me: hm i feel like it isn't really all that necessary to write much angst for canon Stockman, given how much he already goes through what he should go through is a friggin break
also me: isn't it funny how even as a brain in a jar there are still injuries he is not immune to, aka concussions
#bambi's rambling#tmnt 2003#2k3 tmnt#2003 baxter stockman#tmnt baxter stockman#look i'm just saying that concussions are caused by the brain smacking into something hard aka the inside of your skull#and he may not have a skull anymore but he certainly has walls around him#also i think epf era stockman would be terrified of concussions of any kind cause bishop is Very Clear that he's kept around for his brain#but that is still something that could be injured yknow? even as a cyborg he's not invincible he can still experience physical harm#that said i feel like he'd actually be less likely to notice if he got a concussion. brains dont exactly have pain receptors#and also your ability to process stuff logically/recognize your own symptoms tends to be dampened by concussions lol#and tbh your symptoms are probably very different when you have much less body that could be affected by a brain injury
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dear nonblack ppl,
not every piece of media in existence has to become about You yk. you can engage with things created by black folks and not try to spin or parody it to make it more generally relatable yk. you can appreciate the bits of culture black folks choose to share without memeifying it yk. you can just engage with the art as it is and cope with not being the target audience while still enjoying it yk. you don't have to make black culture a joke to engage with it yk.
#ok to rb#something something the memeification of black culture is a scurge#bunny rambles#and b4 anyone goes “ohhhhh its just a joke its just for laughs its just silly” yeah i know. ik its a joke to you#and its really probably small potatoes at the end of the day but also. Every Fucking Major Piece of black media (ESPPP music) gets parodied#and memeified even if its not a fun cute song but like. songs about trauma and the pain of being black#something something why do you think its inherently funny to meme black artists work specifically#makes me think of that post talking ab how many meme scratch edit screenshot type things are from posts where black folks have shared like.#real shit or have been vulnerable or were simply Posing and then became a joke image#thinking about how many black folks simply Arent credited for their work and contributions#thinking about the fact that ive met a terrifying am of white ppl who prefer white parodies of black music > the original songs and think#Nothing Of It. idk. its just exhausting to see and ik black folks are even more exhausted#this is bc of the doechii denial is a river parodies yes but also nasty girl and the phrase match my freak and the way aave is constantly#being memeified & the way black TV is ignored unless its to laugh At & the way black art is ignored unless its Consumable enough and and and
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um not really relevant to anything but fuck insurance companies. specifically medical ones
#ed cetera#i don't like to rant about my personal life here because like. iiiiii just dont like it. but damn i need to yell into the void#for YEARS now. like literally since i was in elementary school. ive been dealing with a medical issue. but its gotten more frequent lately#the tldr is that i get pain in my abdomen and i have to sit down for longer than ive been up. because just sitting down a bit doesnt help#ive been ass at documenting my symptoms bc i thought id never get it diagnosed so while i think there are other symptoms i cant say for sure#but like. ive been going to the doctor to figure this out and she's pretty sure its a type of dysautonomia. although she has some other-#-theories#but since medical insurance companies hate ANYONE who might have something wrong with them.#i have to go through a fucking endoscopy and god knows how many other tests for things I don't have before i can get a tilt table test.#like stomach issues run in my family so ive been DREADING endoscopies and colonoscopies and so on and so forth.#mainly because you have to be put under anesthesia for them and get an iv. which are two things i hate#(and also ive refused to be put on anesthesia for a major surgery i had because i was that fucking terrified)#but like. YEAH SURE LET'S MAKE YOU GO THROUGH SOME REALLY INCONVENIENT AND TERRIBLE SHIT FOR GOD KNOWS HOW LONG#BEFORE YOU CAN FINALLY KNOW WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU!!!!#and. this might sound stupid. because unfortunately i have something up with my brain that causes me to have specific thought processes#(another thing i probably won't figure out what it's being caused by for some years(#but like. i know a cane will help me. ill be able to use it to walk for slightly longer so i can sit down safely somewhere.#but I don't want to get one until i officially KNOW what i have. because what if its something that can be easily fixed.#like a new medication or change in habit or something#then i wont NEED it. and that makes me feel preemptive guilt#so. god knows how long ill be dealing with my symptoms before i can actually get myself a tool that will help#and god knows how long ill be waiting to get this figured out!!#anyways um. stepping down from my soapbox.#i am doing alright. just had to fill out some paperwork and got pissed about it
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genuine question how the fuck am I supposed to do all the [gestures vaguely] the everything
#terrified of my future again :D#like. I've always said I want to go into conservation#and it is very much a passion for me but I also wonder if some of that comes from the existential dread abt it I've had since I was 9#and there aren't a lot of conservation careers that appeal to me that much#like in an ideal world I could be a zookeeper at a good zoo but those positions are SO highly competitive I could probably never get a foot#-in the door#but what else do I have going for me!!!! I want to be a writer but that won't work out as a full time profession and I find filmmaking-#-really really interesting but not so much that I'd want to do it my whole life same with acting#working with horses would be really fun but I also recognize that's a dangerous path that maybe I don't want to be on forever#and vet. medicine is off the table bc I can't do medical shit after everything and I dont want to be around animals in pain all day
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Me and my sister after crying over edits of dinosaurs
#dinosaurs make me so sad#do you think their young played with eachother? the same way our animals do ?#do you ever think about the excruciating pain they probably felt when the meteor hit? when the volcanos erupted and the earthquakes happened#and the tsunamis?#they were probably terrified#I need to shut up bro#anyways dinosaurs are so cool guys#💛!me talking💀
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On the bright side, don’t have to do to my nine am class, on the not so bright side, hospital
#I’m probably (hopefully) fine#apart from the pain and the fact that I am shaking like a small dog#but the shaking at least is just from the fact that I am terrified of needles and just got blood drawn#hopefully everything is fine and I can go home soon#I want to go lie in bed and do nothing after this I think#j rambles#they did get the iv in really quick though#which is not the normal case for me
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I finally completed the Anju and Kafei quest 😭
#spoilers in tags no peeking if you don't want spoilers#rambles from the floor#majora's mask#peggy plays majora's mask#Peggy plays#anyways hhhwwwwwaaauugghghgh#took me forever to remember how to do the parts I'd already done I remembered only pieces#but i finally got to the last bit#I didn't know where Kafei was#I'd looked all over#but I found Anju#and she said she was going to wait for him#so I sat next to her and waited#because I didn't want her to be alone while the world was ending#and right as I was wondering if I should go look for Kafei again and running through what to try in the next cycle THE DOOR CLICKS#AND KAFEI WALKS IN#AND THEY HUG AND THEY DO THE THING AND THE MASK😭#and I hold off on crying because my siblings were watching but it was a very near thing#and I probably shouldn't be playing this game while I'm already sad/not doing great but#oh well#sniffle.#and anyway there's something weirdly comforting about mm#like it's dark and painful and terrifying#but it's cathartic#and I like that#idk
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the lord is going to need to send me four different blessings to balance out the way this week is going 😍 like one is not enough brother
#lee’s bullshit#phone call yesterday on the toilet BAM “you need to pick your grandfather up from the hospital tmrw”#”bc he passed out mysteriously and has to stay overnight” terrifying! thanks! I’m still on the toilet!#haven’t even gotten off the toilet#”you also need to contact your insane ex and tell her she DOES have to keep paying rent which she will obviously receive well”#cool !! I’m so pumped to hear that !! I’m still mid shit can we resume this in two minutes please.#done with shit!#”yeah idk why she expects this did YOU tell her something to make her believe that?” probably ! I wanted her gone and hated her guts!#”well you need to tell her now” she’s going to love that !!!#roommates come home#”yeah the discussion w our friend who’s losing her shit went (predictably) badly and now we’re all upset again” so cool ! Awesome!#”she also wants a specific apology from you” I could not care less I think she’s so full of shit for all of this I’m done. No.#pick up grandfather today (he’s doing ok thank god j dehydrated from the flu)#get him home have violent indigestion#Visit other grandparents while I’m in town#”your aunt is in extended rehab rn for addiction” sooooo cool ok awesome !! Great!#back home now having violent chest pain !! Probably stress induced but who knows.#anyway at least the double side family addictive personality trend enforces my decision to never touch alcohol !!#what a fun weekend. Can’t wait to work all day tmrw. Jesus fuck.#anyway whatever I’m tired I’m going to watch tv or something
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I am sooo tired of not knowing the outcome of thingssss...
#💭#i NEED to move... i cannot keep living where i am now i CANNOTTT#i barely leave my room or eat or clean unless i'm home alone#i can't live like this for another year or i'll genuinely be worried like. how it will affect me more than it already has#but my bf and i need to find a place by the end of may#and unless we can find something income based#we can't rlly do anything about it till i get a job bc of our income being too low#which i've been trying to do for MONTHS#if we can't move in together we're both still moving we both need better places#but worst case scenario he night have to move to a different town than me...#which i also am so terrified of#and if i moved there with him i'd be away from my family instead of him still#i already spend so much time by myself... it gets so lonely#this probably sounds stupid but i am pretty sure i've never had a panic attack until tonight that is#i just can't take itttt all i want is to live in a decent place with my dear boyfriend where we can come home to each other#and have a job that doesn't make me feel like i'm getting run over by a steamroller#my chronic pain and fatigue only keep getting worse i get so winded just from like. 2 chores at home 😭#it would be better if my life was more stableeee and i was eating betterrrr etc etccc#sorry i keep ranting it's just SOO MUCH 💔💔💔
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I have a rich inner world abt both iterations of Miguel and the relationship to fatherhood <- literally just hc
#90s miguel would explode on the spot if he spontaneously became a father shdjdjfjfjf he’s barely grappling through the emotional arc of#trying to become a better man AND he has the most hang ups ever regarding parents in general.#BUT. but. his biggest issue w being a dad would honestly be his own tendency towards self sabotage AND the fact Miguel is like. desperately#scared he’s bound to his own blood. he’d honestly probably fuck up being a dad not because he lacks the capability to be a kind man (all of#2099 demonstrates he DOES have the ability and desire to change) but because#he’d be scared he’d intrinsically fuck it up and in that fear. actually fuck it up. and then see those mistakes as further proof he just#isn’t capable of this.#not to mention like. given just how complicated his relationship with his family is I don’t think fatherhood would EVER have been something#90s miguel would’ve even THOUGHT of. he’s too busy been terrified he’ll turn into his OWN father(s)#atsv miguel on the other hand. difficult to draw too many concrete strands of analysis from because we don’t know how his past will be#conceptualised. BUT I personally like to think he’s very similar to the 90s counterpart except he sees a version of himself as a father.#and he sees that version of himself be HAPPY as a father. be a *good* father. someone who raised a sweet daughter. who lives with definitive#proof that you aren’t bound to enact pain upon your children. that you CAN be a better parent than the ones you had.#I think THAT would shake Miguel. and I like to think atsv Miguel didn’t know he wanted to be a dad - didn’t even THINK of it - until he saw#a reflection of himself that said this was possible. that you can go on and have a family of your own and you can choose to make it a good#and loving thing.#ANYWAYS. ✌️ she came. she posted a huge Miguel rant. she left ✌️#tunes talks spiderverse#tunes talks 2099
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whyyy do I keep getting ad after ad after ad about things to help me get pregnant? ?? I am actively avoiding that outcome actually, and will be for probably the rest of my life, thanks
#i am not financially or emotionally capable of raising a child#also i just dont want to so#and pregnancy sounds terrifying and so does childbirth#not even the pain part#but the probable lack of autonomy and control over my body
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mom and I watched Goosebumps (2015) and honestly it was pretty not-great overall but Ough the twist using The Ghost Next Door was so good. I wasn't even very involved with Goosebumps as a kid and I remember that episode of the show vividly because the shock and tragedy of it really stuck with me. Perfect choice for the One Good Monster imo. she and Jack Black were pretty much the saving grace of this movie
#the rest of it feels so by the book (no pun intended lol) and the dialogue is like#everybody's immediately ready with a perfect sarcastic one liner#and it's that kind of movie where it's terrified to take itself too seriously so they have to load every scene with stupid jokes#like the bit with the police where one of them was in training so they had to keep correcting her on stuff? painful lmao#i would say this movie is probably fun for kids but tbh idk how they'd feel about it since kids today didnt rly grow up with GB#(or maybe theyre still reading them idk)#anyway it was pretty meh overall. i did like the monster designs tho#and im a sucker for tragic girls so they got me there
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I’m so sick of cats being graphically killed in movies and tv shows (even books - the once and future king is HORRIBLE for this) as just a way of showing how evil the villain is. Everyone gets all upset when a dog dies, but cats are just disposable dramatic devices. I hate it so much; it ruins my whole experience of that piece of media and usually my whole day.
#Text#that’s a whole little creature with feelings and emotions and probably someone who loves it#and it was terrified and in pain
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