#BC GUESS WHAT I'M NOT

[darcyolsson]

in loving memory of tumblr's april fools' pranks 💐 2014 - 2024

icymi, tumblr used to do an elaborate april fool's prank every year, but this year they suddenly stopped. here's a somewhat detailed recap of everything they did over the decade:

2013 - mishapocalypse (honourable mention): tumblr staff didn’t start doing april fools until 2014, but the mishapocalypse happened on tumblr in 2013 and i feel like this list would be incomplete without it

2014 - tumblrpro: upon opening your dash you were greeted by an “inspirational” video, that ended with the option to get “tumblrpro (for free)”. all it did was put a top hat on your icon.

2015 - tumblr executivesuite/coppy: a copying machine appeared in the corner of your dash. it would offer tips on how to use tumblr, like clippy the paperclip used to do in microsoft word. as the day went on, it slowly broke down and died right in front of your eyes. many people hated him (but not me). you could also make a (small) spreadsheet. @executivesuite2016 is the official blog.

2016 - this is decision/lizard election/tumblrdecides: a parody of the 2016 US elections. there were 4 lizards (well, one of them turned out to be a salamander in a scandal) to vote for. the dash looked different and there was a live news report with election updates, as well as an election blog for each lizard. they all had their own slogans and you would get an "i voted" button after you voted that would get slapped next to your icon. there were built-in functions to make an election poster for your favourite lizard and to create a text post that supported your lizard of choice that autogenerated a statement for all your followers to read. imo tumblr’s april fools peak. @thisisdecision2016-blog is the official blog, @mop-2016-blog @wretchedtooth @timefordeborah-blog were candidates. rick also had a blog (rick-official) but that now seems to have vanished because he ended up dropping out of the election. mop won, if you're curious. by far the most elaborate prank tumblr ever did.

2017 - horse friend: a tamagotchi-inspired game where you had to take care of a little horse in the corner of your screen. it came with a randomly generated name, and you had to feed and clean up after it. if you didnt take good care of it, it died. you could then hatch (yes, hatch) a new one. there was also an option to look at the names of all your dead horses. this is now available to buy in the tumblr shop. @horse-friends is the official blog.

2018 - tumblcoin: a parody of cryptocurrency (this was the year bitcoin took off). you could ‘invest’ in tumblcoin, with which you could in turn buy things with to spice up your dash, including last year’s horse friend, coppy from 2015, and a frame for around your icon. you could share the amount of tumblcoin you owned in an automatically generated gif post which would be tagged #tbc2018 and #tumblcoin. @tumblcoin is the official blog.

2019 - @memories: this blog still functions the way it did on april fools itself! it's like mad libs, where it takes post templates and then adds in tags you use a lot and users you frequently interact with on your main blog. like a personalized shitpost bot.

2020 - group chat prank/@storybot: it was so hard to find info on this because it was contained entirely in the now-defunct group chat function, which no one used. i had to go through the notes of this post for information because no one cared enough to actually write anything explaining it. turns out, you could write a story with your mutuals by adding storybot to your group chat. it also kept working after april fools (well, up until the group chats were deleted) just like memories. many people missed out on it entirely because they did not use the group chat function.

2021 - tumblcryptids: tumblr allowed you to adopt “non-fungible tumblcryptids”, a parody of NFTs. clicking a button that said "Summon thy Tumblrcryptid" would spawn an image of a little blob-shaped creature with a short description, which would always read "Hi! My name is [randomly generated name]. I love [thing most people like]. I hate [thing most people dislike]. Like my parent, I can't get enough of #[tag from your main blog]." you could share them in a post, which would automatically add the tag #NFTumblcryptids to your post. and yes, people on the piss on the poor website freaked out about it because they thought they were real NFTs harming the environment. @tumblcryptidadoptioncenter is the official blog.

2022 - click-a-thon: when you clicked a light switch on your dashboard, a bunch of colourful things showed up, like a sponge you could move around, an "engagament meter", clickable buttons, and a “Summon Crab!” button, which would summon a crab when you clicked it. you could. the crabs, like horse friend, are still available in the tumblr store as of 2025. here's some screenshots. there were various ways to share your crab activities, which would all get tagged #april fools 2022. the prank was presented as a marketing technique created by Brick Whartley, a fictional businessman character created by tumblr, who (afaik) originated in a post on the official blog of the 2018 april fools prank, albeit originally in a different role. around this time he also started functioning as the mascot for tumblr's shop ( @emporium )

2023 - abstract reactions (emoji reacts): buttons were added to every post that allowed you to add emoji reactions, many of them based on tumblr inside jokes (horse as a reference to horse plinko/horse friend, vanilla for the vanilla extract meme, pikaman, bug for bug race, and brick whartley, who wasn't a meme but staff really wanted him to be). if one specific emoji was used a certain amount of times it would add an effect to the post, eg many cheese emoji reacts would cover the post in cheese. this was also attributed to Brick Whartley ("his" blog @brickwhartley also documented the day)

2024 - boop-o-meter: allowed you to “boop” other users who had opted in to the booping, like facebook’s poke feature back in the day. depending on how long you held the button, you would either boop, super boop, or evil boop. on the dashboard there was a counter for both how many times you had booped others and how many times others had booped you, as well as how many boops were given side-wide. when booping someone, an image of a cat paw appeared. you would get badges (which can still be used) for booping 1, 100 and 1000 times. if you gave/received more than 999 boops, the counter would switch to showing a three-letter word (see this post for specifics). this was brought back for halloween 2024 (as BOOp-o-meter. get it), with a ghost, skeleton and mummy paw. no official blog, but here's an official recap for april first from staff. i believe this was the only april fools prank that was mobile user friendly.

2025 - @fandom is running some polls, i guess

[frenchublog]

[pangloss-artee]

pacifica got the "cut hair to show character development" treatment bc i think she deserves it

[inkskinned]

we were sitting on the floor and i was cutting out tiny pictures to make a collage for a friend's birthday. you were on your phone and you laughed about something, and i was still in love with you then, so i asked what had you giggling.

"sorry. i was just..." you took a moment and went back to texting. "i was telling someone about how you're afraid of the dark."

i'm afraid of the dark because something bad happened. "oh." i felt a little slinky of shame crawl down my throat.

you glanced up, and maybe it showed on my face, because you rolled your eyes and held the phone to the side casually so i could see the group chat. "what? was it a secret?"

i looked down to the scissors in my hand. "i just..." no, it's not a secret. it just felt like something private, something serious. saying why would you tell someone that just feels like an accusation. it's unfair. i honestly am not even ashamed of it, it's just a fact about my person that i don't usually share.

what a strange experience. is this a human thing or a generational thing? for our grandparents: did they need to worry about how quickly someone can just... share your personal information? again, i didn't even really have a true objection. what could i say? i want any person in my life to feel they can be honest with their friends. it's not like i said don't tell anyone this.

i cut out another letter to complete the rainbow happy birthday, started hunting for the exclamation mark. i heard you sigh dramatically.

"don't make a big deal about this," you said.

this entire conversation was a pattern for us, and this was when we got to my least favorite part of the pattern. i would get my feelings hurt in some oblique not-technically-terrible way, and then it would be making a big deal about something. you'd get frustrated for me for being soft, but i was born soft. you knew i was soft when you pierced me. it's one of the things that made controlling me so easy.

"i'm not," i felt my voice crack. the question came without my wanting. "why are you guys talking about me?" and why are you saying that thing? why not like - i'm telling them how you're generous and kind and pretty.

you let out this low, tragic groan. "oh my god." you tossed the phone away from your body. "there, see? i just won't talk to them if you don't like it."

the rest of the hour went the way it always went, between us: i said i don't actually mind if you talk to your friends but -, you found a way to call my minor expression of discomfort "being dramatic." you got upset that i had been offended. i ended up apologizing, even though i hadn't actually done anything.

afterwards, you picked up the phone again. after texting for a little bit, you snorted. "okay," you said, "but it is kind of funny you're afraid of the dark. i mean, when you think about it."

[lazylittledragon]

ok someone please correct me if i'm wrong but am i weird for thinking those 'audiobooks don't count as reading' posts are ableist as fuck????

[sceebybeeby]

someone has to have done this

[rimatsu]

buck forcing eddie-tommy to rekindle their friendship and make amends via facetime post-reconciliation by shoving his phone in tommy's hands with a pointed, no-nonsense look and a "be nice" directed at eddie before booking it out of the room would heal me actually. also it would be hilariously awkward

[bluevelvetea]

So start by saving me, Itadori.

(Find my reference here)

[why-the-heck-not]

me, a responsible being, working on the coding project as I should vs. me, a dysfunctional shithead, getting distracted by reading about brains (once aGAIN damnit (it's my favorite "I need to study my field but bc I should do that it's an impossible unthinkable feat now, so I'm reading about something else to fool my brain I'm still being productive"-topic))

[laurellala-comics]

A Shakespearean comedy of errors

bonus:

[seawitchkaraoke]

never gonna get tired of Aabria and Brennan playing dnd together, they know each other so well, they are so fun, they're clearly having so much fun ''does Evan have a grenade??'' ''idk will you let me? :)'', ''you know what I'm gonna ask'' ''yeah I throw myself in front of Sam, absolutely'', ''I'll give it to you, if you detach your shadow'' ''.....(pause, clearly aware that with Aabria as a dm, this will have Consequences) yeah I do it, I want to get all of them'', ''is my shadow back with us?'' ''no :)'' ''okay. (concerning)''

And that's just this episode, but there's so many little moments in all of their campaigns that really read as ''I will fuck you up <3'' ''I know and I am walking into it with open eyes <3'' from both of them, never hold any punches, because they know the other one doesn't want them to, just. Inflicting emotional damage on each other for funsies is a love language I guess?

It's beautiful

[stlamb]

2025 has been the most non-year year of my life like i'm still waiting for this year to actually start, what is this mess

[charlesemersonwinchesteriii]

so how are you all feeling about this

[isawiitch]

they should've hired me to write & direct a strange and esoteric minecraft movie about the unnerving loneliness and fear that comes from early game minecraft and while you master solo survival you become an excellent builder with a wealth of resources saved away. Importantly there comes a tonal shift once you like discover the joys of multiplayer and building something with others- again contrasted with the eventual late game like High after you've got all your diamonds and enchanted armor and you're so powerful nothing scares you and you just mine and craft and build and kill endlessly traveling further and filling your huge storage room and you can feel people playing the game less and less and despite being so powerful the world feels more and more empty in a strangely anxiety inducing way, no matter how much you build, and you try to figure out how to get people interested again, the deep dark, the vast wilderness, dark mansions, the nether, you conquer it all, with minimal companionship, and then alone. then you find an End Portal and it clicks. hype is renewed as you all rally around Something- you start to work towards this one goal again and in the end its a huge battle obviously and you get your loot and your elytra and as you fly over the vast kingdom you've created while your friends return to a small base town you built together and you stand atop a faraway mountain and say. huh. the world gets quiet again and in a moment of contemplation you realize minecraft was in fact about the friends we made along the way. so you return to the small town, and use your vast skill and resources to make the base town something really special for your friends and help each other with their projects, but life is slower since they're playing less. new people join and leave, its quiet, then busy, then quiet. but you still build, for them and for yourself, knowing that they may or may not return, but that what you built together will remain regardless. and also herobrine is just like in the background of the shots sometimes.

[fbfh]

Thinking about lazy morning sex with Jason Grace. Making him feel so wanted because you’ve just woken up and there’s a million things you could be doing but all you want is him. Imagine his brain short circuiting at the concept of being the first thing you want when you wake up. He’s not an afterthought anymore and he just can’t wrap his head around it.

Jason is so sweet in the morning. He's all disoriented and drowsy, his eyes are all puffy from sleep and his glasses are sitting on the night table where he left them last night. his blonde hair looks like he got struck by lightning, which in all honesty wouldn't surprise you knowing him. his cheeks are all flushed and his muscles are all soft and relaxed. he's never been relaxed before ever, and it's only since he started sharing a bed with you, snuggling up with you and feeling your soft little good night kisses that he's known what peace feels like. so that particular morning, birds and cicadas singing outside, the ac blasting cold air over you and your blonde superman of a boyfriend, you just can't resist him. you're so right that he's not used to not being an afterthought. this is literally Jason whenever you express how much you love him or even do the bare minimum, much less treat him the way he deserves to be treated. you're like I love you so much and he's like whhhat??? whhat is going on????? what the hhhell are you tahlking about?????????? then you kiss him and his brain short circuits. this morning in particular you just can't resist him. you start peppering his puffy sleepy face in kisses. he's barely awake, he's blinking one eye at a time and thinks it's dream. then you climb on top of him, and that really wakes him up. his brain understands unbelievably horny hottie and sitting on my morning wood, but he can't get much further than that. he can't connect the two, make himself realize that he's the reason you're like this. and quite frankly if he did his head and balls would explode so violently neither of you would come back from that. so as you ride him, languid and lazy, soaking in every electrifying sensation of pleasure shared between you two, as you indulge yourself in touching him, kissing him, anywhere and everywhere you possibly can, you decide this is a good starting point. your breathing gets faster and you keep moaning out his name, sighing it into his lips over wet, messy kisses that just get deeper and deeper and he can't believe his ears. but he really wants to. you decide this is a good place to start. maybe after a few more weeks of riding his morning wood till he's nice and soft, he'll start to get the hint that you really, really like him. like, a lot.

[wardingshout]

Viridian trainers for day 5 of spesilverweek! they are my most beloved but Lance is a cursed character who is impossible to draw or portray in any way to me