#BC this is fiction... something may just have to be done to UHHH. make sure they never do the same thing to someone else again 🤷‍♀️

[mad-hunts]

❛ It terrifies me what I would do for you. ❜ (from Viktor, down the lime, partially transformed)

starters for dark and toxic ships.

whenever barton came home that evening, it was with his own great discomfort that he was not feeling like himself. though being covered in blood wasn't exactly a new thing for him at all. it was the way that barton could simultaneously barely keep his eyes open, and couldn't stop shaking that got him to call viktor at a late time in the evening; but it wasn't arguably too bad as he'd escaped arkham that time at around 10 pm. it was then closer to eleven, however, as it took barton some time to get home in his current state. but considering the only thing barton could muster to say on the other end of the phone was 'hey, i need you to come over if you're available. please?' in a croaky voice? he thought there was a pretty darn good chance that viktor would show up.

and thankfully, he did. because god's, did barton feel like he was on the road to downward spiraling. one new doctor there proved to be an absolute barbarian... perhaps worse than even the infamous doctor orion for him, who seemed to hate him the instant he took one look at him. pyrotherapy or artificial fever was an outdated therapy for a reason; it didn't work for mental illness, and most of all, it was just plain ridiculous to think that forcing an elevated body temperature upon someone could help their mind in any capacity. but of course the asylum had attracted a doctor that, for all extents and purposes, should've had his medical license revoked as far as barton was concerned. so although it took a painstakingly long time for it to happen, his death couldn't have come sooner, in his opinion.

making someone physically ill and then forcing them to suffer through it by giving them strong sedatives was abuse. plain and simple, and it was amazing that the literal serial killer could understand this, but not doctor wagner. oh well... barton could only muster to put a cold compress on his head and pull some covers over his body once he got home. he was too exhausted, and too jittery to do much else. so barton was thanking his lucky stars that at least he wouldn't have to be alone while suffering through this when he heard a knock at the door. leaving the door open specifically so viktor could get in was a good idea as there was no way he was getting up without help now.

and whenever the other entered, soon discovering the other was in the throes in illness? all his drug-addled brain could do was reach out to hug viktor as if he thought he might disappear if he let go. there was some exchanges from there, mostly on viktor's side of things, that ranged from him asking things like what happened? and then, did someone do this to you? barton nodded at that before viktor said something that definitely made him at least ten times more attractive to him: well, they're going to regret it. barton could only laugh at that as he mustered out the words: 'i already took care of them.' well, viktor didn't seem too satisfied with that answer as he asked barton something akin to, 'all of them? you took care of all of the people who did this to you?' and then proceeded to tell him he was scared of the kinds of things he would do for barton.

god's, barton thought, viktor needed to stop being so damn hot whilst he was shaking like a leaf in his arms. though that kind of thing normally would've raised alarm bells in other people's brains and understandably so. barton, however, was different from those people. the truth was... his fate was in the hands of more than just one person while at arkham. but the ones who stood by, who were complicit and just went along with what the doctor told them to do, were people that barton tried not to concern himself with. his main oppressor was gone and that was all that mattered, right? barton clung onto the fabric of viktor's shirt with one hand as he dug his head into the other's shoulder.

the thought of admitting that it had happened at that moment and thus he let some of them off way too easy felt semi-mortifying at that moment, admittedly. because although they shouldn't have done it in the first place, yes, it was a fact that they were still out there. barton tried not to dry-heave as he looked up from viktor's shoulder, his lips twitching into a snarl at the thought these people were probably thinking they got away with it. all he could do at the moment was chuckle humorlessly whilst he shivered and let one of his hands fall from viktor's body.

❝ well, no, but i'll take care of the rest of them once i'm well again. so don't go out and do anything rash — alright? even though it does kind of thrill me that you'd be willing to do some wild things for me, viktor. i mean, i did somehow escape and drag myself all the way here through a high fever. a fever that they fucking... induced on me by the way. so, if i can do that, then i should be able to hunt these sadists down. ❞

[lenin-it-to-win-it]

twenty questions

tagged by: @bandaged-chessmaster

Rules: answer the 20 questions and tag twenty followers (@ that second part yeah right lmaooo)

nickname/s: lenin, dodo, soey, geronimo stilton @pillowelephant anytime u talk about me during debate practice (which is uhhh all the fuckin time im assuming) make sure u use my CORRECT NAME which is geronimo stilton pls and thx

zodiac sign: gemini 

height: *deep sigh* 5′0″

orientation: pan ace 

nationality: american #fuck tha metric system 

favorite fruit: cherries and cantaloupe 

favorite season: fall bc leaves fall on the ground and i lov the cronch when i step on them, i pretend theyre the bones of my enemies 

favorite book: uhh "the death of ivan ilyich” is technically a novella i guess so probably either “I, Robot” by isaac asimov or “100 Years of Solitude” by gabriel garcia marquez depending on what im in the mood to read 

favorite flower: lillies and i KNOW theres another favorite i have but fuck if i can remember it lol rip

favorite scent: BISCUITS COOKING IN THE OVEN cuz im a slut for BReAD

favorite color: red and purple

favorite animal: i love me some cock um rabbits would be my most favorite but tigers are a pretty close second 

coffee, tea, or hot cocoa: im loco for cocoa my dudes

cat or dog person: i love my specific dog more than any animal in the world but in general i prefer cats

favorite fictional character: uH H  H probably all might tbh bc in general i have a a Thing for characters who push themselves way too fuckin hard despite the fact that literally anyone else in their situation would probably be dead by now and HES MISSING LIKE HALF HIS FUCKIN ORGANS AND YA BOI TOSHI STILL OUT THERE LAYING DOWN THE L A W and he just,,, he loves deku so much (even if he did NOT HESITATE TO BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF HIM DURING THE FINAL) and their father-son bond is everything, i really love good father figures and in general i just think his character is really fascinating and LI TERALLY ANY ART IVE SEEN OF YOUNG TOSHI IS THE BEST ART IVE SEEN IN MY LIFE WE A RE ALL LOVE TOSHI-SENPAI 

# of blankets you sleep with: usually one, two if its cold, and like, 5 or more if im depressed and want to bury myself alive in warmth and pretend theres still joy in life 

dream trip: probably to moscow since i speak some russian so i wouldnt be totally lost 100% of the time like if i went to any other country and there are cool museums and shit also i WANNA GO TO THE FUCKIN G NAKAHARA CHUUYA MUSEUM IN JAPAN APPARENTLY THEY HAVE REPLICAS OF HIS H A T 

blog created:  may 2016 

# of followers: 1,339

random fact: I 100% BELIEVE BNHA IS A BETTER ANIME THAN BSD AND PART OF THE REASON I AVOIDED IT FOR SO LONG (in addition to it being Everywhere) WAS BC I FUCKING  K N E W THIS WOULD HAPPEN AND I DIDNT WANT TO BETRAY THE BSD FANDOM AND ALL BUT HO LY SHIT BNHA IS FUCKIGN GREAT LIKE??? it actually has plot??? and arcs??? eVEn in the first season??? and theres far less tonal dissonance than bsd (bsd DID get better at that in the second season by more or less cutting most of the comedic parts to mixed effect) despite ostensibly being for a younger audience than bsd and not going for the same darker tone or themes of moral ambiguity things have FUCKING  C O N S E QU EN C E S like they have a character who more or less exists JUST to heal injuries and yet we still see characters suffer irreparable physical damage and get scars? like bravo tbh and at least in the anime- i have no idea what the manga is like aside from the first chapters lol oops- its not just a series of one contrivance after another and its so much FUN like bsd is great and all but aside from the dark era which is a masterpiece there arent really any single episodes i’d want to go back and watch more than once but i feel like i could pick literally any episode of bnha and rewatch it and have a good ass time, theres so much passion and positivity in bnha its impossible to watch it and not feel HY PE AF bsd makes me want to do in-depth character studies and analysis and discuss moral ambiguity but bnha genuinely makes me want to be a better person like ofc i cant be a superhero for obvious reasons but i can damn well do something with this life i have and any series that can make me feel like that just,, well done 

tagging: @theseerofdoomisunaltered bc u like these and whoever else wants to do this go ahead and say i tagged u

[cosaimai]

Actually, 1-170, game 😝

why do you subject me to this torture lmao 

but imma do it regardless (leaving out all the ones i’ve already answered ofc)

3: Do you have a favorite clothing style?

Goth of course

4: What was your favorite video game growing up?

hmm i didnt play many video games when i was super young so prob bioshock infinite

5: What three things/people do you think of most each day:

my best friend (@lauren-pc), my fictional crushes… (lets not judge me alright, i dont have a life), does the ocean count?

8: What is your Greek personality type? [Sanguine, Phlegmatic, Choleric, or Melancholic]

melancholic 

9: Are you ticklish?

yes

10: Are you allergic to anything?

lavender

11: What’s your sexuality?

asexual (homoromantic)

12: Do you prefer tea, coffee, or cocoa?

tea

13: Are you a cat or dog person?

hmm prob dog bc even tho cats are adorable their fur tends to bother me since it sheds a lot more easily (which is why i love hairless cats)

18: How much do you weigh? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!]

I havent checked in a while since I don’t own a scale, but I think around 91-95lbs

19: Do you believe in ghosts/spirits?

yes

21: Are you religious?

nope lol

22: Pet peeves?

smacking, chewing w your mouth open, not using a coaster

23: Would you rather be nocturnal or diurnal [opposite of nocturnal]?

nocturnal !!

24: Favorite constellation?

hmmm prob Ursa Major

25: Favorite star?

Deneb or maybe Beta Draconis

26: Do you like ball-jointed dolls?

I am scared of all dolls, so, no

27: Any phobias or fears?

spiders & most bugs, also more specifically, dying in a sinking car

28: Do you think global warming is real?

ye

31: Do you get scared easily?

nope

32: How many pets have you own in your lifetime?

six i think

33: Blog rate? [You’ll rate the blog of the one who’s asking.]

11/10 :)

34: What is a color that calms you?

ocean blue ♥

35: Where would you like to travel and/or live?

in Washington state, preferably close to the coast

36: Where were you born?

texas

38: Introvert or extrovert?

extreme introvert

39: Do you believe in horoscopes and zodiacs?

ehh, they’re interesting and i do think you can apply them to people, so maybe ig

40: Hugs or kisses?

ughh i guess hugs

41: Who is someone you would like to see/visit right now?

my best friend

42: Who is someone you love deeply?

again, my best friend

43: Any piercings you want?

spider bites (which i’m getting soon !!), daith, conch, maybe an industrial, maybe a nostril piercing 

44: Do you like tattoos and piercings?

if you can’t tell, yes lol

45: Do you smoke or have you eiver done so?

I don’t, the closest I’ve come is vaping bc my friend’s step brother & his friend wanted me to try his vape

48: A sound you really love?

heavy rain/thunderstorms

49: Can you do a backflip?

um lmao no

50: Can you do the splits?

I think I still have my right splits, not my left or middle tho

51: Favorite actor and/or actress?

i guess I’d have to say Jake Gyllenhaal tho

53: How are you feeling right now?

i am tired

54: What color would you like your hair to be right now?

probably red or black, idk

55: When did you feel happiest?

probably last year, almost anytime during history class

56: Something that calms you down?

ASMR videos

57: Have any mental disorders? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!]

none that are prof-dxed

58: What does your URL mean?

 oh i’ve told this tale many times on this blog, but to tell it once again: I used to go by the name Mai, and I used to be obsessed with space so cosmic+mai=mai and for some reason i made it cosaimai so basically cosmic mai mai

59: What three words describe you the most?

quiet, jaded, eccentric 

60: Do you believe in evolution?

yeah, i guess so

61: What makes you unfollow a blog?

if the content is really my thing or the person running it is transphobic/homophobic/etc. 

64: Favorite animal(s):

BATS ♥♥♥

66: Favorite emoticon:

c:

67: Favorite meme:

i can’t choose just one, i mean, pretty much any meme @lauren-pc sends me is pretty high quality

68: What is your MBTI personality type?

INTP

69: What is your star sign?

Aries

70: Can your dog roll over on command, if you have a dog?

I have two dogs and no

71: What outfit out of all your clothes do you like to wear the most?

uhhh probably my new killstar bittersweet babydoll dress

72: Post a selfie or two?

i posted two yesterday sooooo….

73: Do you have platform shoes?

i do !!

74: What is one random but interesting fact about yourself?

i can cross both my eyes, as well as cross just one at a time

75: Can you do a front flip?

nope, i wish

76: Do you like birds?

ehh, they’re alright 

77: Do you like to swim?

not really

78: Is swimming or ice skating more fun to you?

i do not like either, but i guess swimming

79: Something you wish didn’t exist:

Donald Trump

80: Some thing you wish did exist:

Can I say Starfleet?? bc i’m gonna say Starfleet

81: Piercings you have?

none :’(

82: Something you really enjoy doing:

sleeping

83: Favorite person to talk to:

@lauren-pc

84: What was your first impression of Tumblr?

that it was extremely boring, and here i am almost 5 years later

85: How many followers do you have?

364

86: Can you run a mile within ten minutes?

hell no

87: Do your socks always match?

yes, i actually specifically wear all black socks for this reason

88: Can you touch your toes and keep your legs straight completely?

ye

89: What are your birthstones?

diamond is the only one i know

90: If you were an animal, which one would you be?

a bat :)

91: If a flower could aesthetically represent you, what kind would it be?

hmmm…. this is difficult but probably like Cranesbill Geranium or smth

92: A store you hate?

Ross

93: How many cups of coffee can you drink in one day?

none, coffee makes me sick :/

94: Would you rather be able to fly or read minds?

read minds

95: Do you like to wear camo?

no

96: Winter or summer?

winter i guess

97: How long can you hold your breath for?

I have no clue, but probably less than 30 secs

98: Least favorite person?

well out of the people i know personally, probably my friends boyfriend

99: Someone you look up to:

oh gosh, i have no clue

100: A store you love?

if online stores count, definitely Killstar

101: Favorite type of shoes

tbh flipflops bc I’m lazy

102: Where do you live?

Texas

103: Are you a vegetarian or vegan? If so, why?

no, i wish i had the will to be a vegetarian 

104: What is your favorite mineral or gem?

aura quartz 

105: Do you drink milk?

Yes, milk is great tho my mild lactose intolerance disagrees with this fact

106: Do you like bugs?

no

107: Do you like spiders?

especially no

108: Something you get paranoid about?

usually bugs crawling on me while i sleep, or someone breaking into my house while i sleep

109: Can you draw:

i can, debatable whether it’s good or not tho

110: Nosiest question you have ever been asked?

no one tends to ask me very nosy questions

111: A question you hate being asked?

i’m open to pretty much any questions, but i guess i hate boring ones, none in specific come to mind

112: Ever been bitten by a spider?

I might have been, I didn’t know whether it was a spider bite for sure or not

113: Do you like the sound of waves at the beach?

yes

114: Do you prefer cloudy or sunny days?

cloudy

115: Someone you’d like to kiss or cuddle right now:

no one actually, I’m in a very touch averse mood

116: Favorite cloud type:

cirroctratus 

117: What color do you wish the sky was?

dusty pink or a darker shade of blue

118: Do you have freckles?

nah

119: Favorite thing about a person:

i don’t quite get what exactly this is asking but i guess appearance-wise, hands

120: Fruits or vegetables?

fruits

121: Something you want to do right now:

go to a lake or beach

122: Is the ocean or sky prettier?

ocean

123: Sweet or sour foods?

sweet

124: Bright or dim lights?

dim

125: Do you believe in a certain magical creature?

not really, unless you count aliens 

126: Something you hate about Tumblr:

all the drama

127: Something you love about Tumblr:

it’s easy to find content i enjoy

128: What do you think about the least?

i guess politics ?? i have no clue

129: What would you want written on your tombstone?

“NOW AS DEAD OUTSIDE AS SHE WAS INSIDE”

130: Who would you like to punch in the face right now?

No one comes to mind, except perhaps Donald Trump

131: What is something you love but also hate about yourself?

my weirdness, it’s interesting but usually deters people

132: Do you smile with your teeth showing for pictures?

no, i hate my teeth

133: Computer or TV?

TV I suppose

134: Do you like roller coasters?

nope

135: Do you get motion sickness or seasickness?

not usually

136: Are your ears lobed or attached?

attached

137: Do you believe in karma?

no 

138: On a scale of 1-10, how attractive would you say you are?

4/10

139: What nicknames do you have/have had?

Ry, Cosai-chan, Cosai, Mai, Rave (idk how many of those count but there ya go)

140: Did you have any pretend or imaginary friends?

no

141: Have you ever seen a therapist/shrink?

nope

142: Would you say you are a good or bad influence to others?

uhhh…. i’ve been called a bad influence so i guess i am

143: Do you prefer giving or receiving gifts/help?

receiving 

144: What makes you angry

people who don’t listen/don’t think i know what i’m talking about

145: How many languages do you speak fluently?

just english, though i could probably manage a conversation with my poor knowledge of french

146: Do you prefer boys, girls, and/or non-binaries?

girls & nb people

147: Are you androgynous?

i wish

148: Favorite physical thing about yourself:

eyes 

149: Favorite thing about your personality:

resilience 

151: If you could go back into time and live in one era, which would you choose?

The 80s for sure

152: Do you like BuzzFeed?

kinda

154: Do you like to kiss others’ foreheads or hands for platonic reasons?

no

155: Do you like to play with others’ hair?

sometimes

156: What embarrasses you?

almost everything i do when I’m around people bc for some reason i can’t help but think i mess up everything i do

157: Something that makes you nervous/anxious:

being around people

159: How many people are you following?

709

160: How many posts do you have on your blog(s)?

11, 604 on this one; 288 on my gore blog; 848 on my bpd blog

161: How many drafts do you have on your blog(s)?

29; 1; 0

162: How many likes do you have on your blog(s)?

7, 244

163: Last time you cried and why:

i don’t remember

164: Do you have long or short hair?

it’s kinda in between, i guess you could say long

165: Longest your hair has ever been:

a few inches above my waist

166: Why do you like, dislike, or have neutral feelings about religon?

i dislike it because it’s boring and kinda pointless for the most part, but to each their own

167: Do you really care how the universe and world was created?

occasionally 

168: Do you like to wear makeup?

not really

169: Can you stand on your hands or head for more than thirty seconds?

nope

170: Did you answer the questions you were asked truthfully?

yes

[nordlichtgeschichten]

Question Time with Hal

owo thanks @warofmywords​

How Many WIPS are you working on at the minute? Yes. Too many RIP

What is each WIP about? Uhhh let’s go with the. Top 5. 1 - Finding Magic: Runa and Laith are just two normal teenagers from a small village in a country named Galetha. Until one day, Laith gets a cryptic letter from his grandfather; he and Runa can’t quite decipher it, but know he’s trying to tell something important. So they, alongside Runa’s unicorn friend Falfain, Runa’s dog Fana, and a demon named Ephraim they picked up along the way, leave to find Laith’s grandfather and get some answers. 2 - Rainbow: It’ll be a Visual Novel. In the world of Rainbow, everyone has “soul marks”; they look like simple black tattoos. Whenever someone meets someone who’ll play a big role in their life, good or bad, the mark turns colorful, showing that you’ve just met someone important. Some people never meet the ones their marks mean - It might be authors who inspire them, or celebrities they look up to, and not every mark has a counterpart, though many do. In the VN itself, the player can choose one of six marks, each standing for a different character - And where the journey leads, well, that’s up to the player. Friendship, romance, or something truly supernatural...? 3 - Ira & Lupita: I’m still in the planning phase, but I have written some shorter fics with them. Ira and Lupita are shapechangers and girlfriends, and since the shapechangers in general are vaguely inspired by the World of Darkness Fera, the plot might be, too, but idk yet. 4 - Cyberpunk: This is like, the least planned of them. It’ll be Cyberpunk-esque, following a small group of rebels who’re trying to overthrow the government. 5 - Changes: Lyka used to be just a normal kid. Until a seemingly kind woman promised her and her little sister shelter and food, if only they’d come with her. What the woman hadn’t mentioned was that Lyka and Fia, alongside many other kids and teens, would be used for experiments, designed to strengthen humanity. But this wasn’t what Lyka had in mind, so she tries to escape...

Where are you in the WIP’s progress? Finding Magic - Working on the Second Draft, I gotta rewrite Chapter 3 but am either a) procrastinating or b) too busy with other stuff >-> Rainbow - I’ve gotten like 50k words down b u t I gotta redo some planning bc it has several routes/ends so. Eh. Ira & Lupita - Um, planning and writing small ficlets of it Cyberpunk - Planning Changes - It’s kinda... Dormant right now, but I’m about 20k words in.

Do you have a favourite line in the WIP? if so, where and what chapter and what is it? Just gonna go with Finding Magic, and aside from like almost all of Ephraim’s dialogue, I really like the very first line. Translated, it’s roughly: “A young grove wyvern flew past Runa’s window. It swerved in the breeze and landed on her window sill before it lifted off again and continued its way. She looked after it, watched as it found its way away from the village’s houses and towards the trees.”

Is there anything you wish you could change about how certain events have played out in your WIP? Hm... In Changes, there’s a character death that’s just. T_T.

Who is the worst OC in terms of things they’ve done? Hm... I like my villains to be the typical “heroes of their own story”, as in, they wouldn’t consider themselves villainous and many have understandable reasons - though not necessarily excuses. Since i don’t know enough about the government for the Cyberpunk WIP, I’ll go with Genevieve from Changes. For, y’know, causing the abduction of children and experimenting on them.

Who is considered a Hero/ main character and how did they get to this point? Finding Magic - Runa, Laith, Ephraim and Falfain all get POV chapters, though if I had to pick, I’d name Runa the #1 Main Character. She’s the one who convinces Laith to go look for his grandpa, she’s the one who knows Falfain, and she’s the one who decide to let Ephraim tag along. Rainbow - It’s you! Since you’re the player, and your decisions determine what happens. Ira & Lupita - Unsurprisingly, Ira and Lupita. Cyberpunk - Most of them don’t have names yet I’d put Avery as #1 main character though, since he’s the leader of the rebel group. His second in command is his datemate Jackie/Jordie. Changes - Lyka is the #1 Main Character, since she sets the escape in motion.

What happened to your villain to make them what they are now? Finding Magic - He genuinely thought he was doing good, that he was protecting everyone else. Cyberpunk - Not sure yet, but they probably do believe they’re making the world a better place Changes - Oof well. Genevieve’s firstborn child died of something that does occur in non-human animals, but is usually harmless in those. Her goal is to figure out how to splice animal DNA into humans so that in the future, those kinds of things are treatable.

Is there anything your OCs may want to change about themselves? Laith would love to be better at standing up for himself. At least his girlfriend has his back tho

Who was your first OC you ever created and do they still have a story? Oof, good question... A myriad of Pokémon Self-Inserts and Inserts of my friends, maybe. Or one of my many, many RPG characters... Maybe Fia, who I played in a Jurassic Park RP when I was 10 or 11?

What has been the biggest inspiration for your writing and/or your WIPs? Hm, I’m not sure, it varies depending on the day, my mood, etc. Most recently, it was reading Leigh Bardugo’s Grishaverse books, because I’d love to be able to touch someone the same way her books touched me.

Who is your least favourite OC in terms of things they’ve done? Oof, good question... I guess if they were real people... Genevieve, and whoever made the government the way it is in the Cyberpunk story, even though I don’t even know  that guy yet. But since they aren’t... I can’t hate my own OCs. No matter what they do, I cannot dislike them. I did hate Genevieve when I started Changes, but she’s changed quite a bit since then.

What is one piece of advice you would give Past You, if you were given the chance? Honestly, no idea.

Do any of your characters celebrate Pride? If so, how? I feel like Ira and Lupita might. Runa absolutely would if she lived in our world. Avery and Jackie/Jordie probably did, before they joined the rebel group, because well, they really shouldn’t run around huge crowds with many people who might recognize them.

Is celebrating Pride any different from celebrating ours? Well, the Cyberpunk story is set in the future, so I’m guessing for Avery and Jay it’s similar but slightly different, though I haven’t done enough worldbuilding yet to know how.

Do you prefer fanfiction or original fiction? No. I love both.

How long have you been writing seriously? Hm, define seriously. I’ve been trying since I was, like, 12, even if most of those stories are now banned to a folder called “Old Stories” and not looked at anymore. Changes with its 20k got started when I was 14ish, but has been dormant for half a decade now. I started writing fanfic somewhat regularly in uh... March 2019, and I’ve been more involved in my original fiction since NaNo ‘18. So, pick one of those dates.

What genres do you tend to stick to? Mostly Fantasy, but also some Sci-Fi, I guess?

How good would you say you are at being able to write Angst? Have you ever made someone cry? I’ve made myself cry, does that count?

Any writeblrs you look up to? Well, you, Hal lol. Bc you’re pretty damn awesome at not letting those asshole anons get to you.