#Crack HC

[1-delululand-1]

If LaDS men were vines

M.List

Rafayel would be "let's tell each other a secret about us, I'm gonna go first. I. Hate you."

Xavier would be "road work ahead"

The twins would be "HER SISTER WAS A WITCH"

Sylus would be "this is the dollar store, how good could it be"

Zayne would be "I know you're mentally ill, which is why I'm gonna open up a hospital"

Caleb would be "Back at it again at Krispy Kreme"

[the--firevenus]

Random crack hc, I like to think that if Jason and Bruce ever mend back together their relationship to the point they are generally on good term (still.. Sometimes awkward, but the awkward silent and awkward small talks is enough to show progress they both decide to work on it), I want Jason to guilt trip Bruce with "what? Am I not your son anymore?" kind of question, and it work every. Damn. Time.

Jason: (take the hidden cookie jar Bruce hide from everyone)

Bruce:... You know that's not for you right?

Jason: *dramatic solemn sigh* I guess I'm not much of your son anymore for you not to even share a cookie...

Bruce: *burden by guilt and desire to makes his boy happy*... Im just saying don't eat it all by yourself chum.

Need Jason to capitalise the old man soft spot for him to get away with the silliest thing, need them to feel comfortable around each other enough again to be silly, need them to bond to make up from the lost time GODDAMMIT!!!

[ihavenomoralsss]

Red rising crack headcanons: IRON GOLD SPOILERS

The sole artist played during Cassius’s 10 year bachelor pad era was Fleetwood Mac

Baby Lysander enters the common room at four am and it’s just Silver Springs and Cassius drunk-sprawled on a chair

“YOU WONT FORGET ME DARROW!!! YOU BETTER NOT” <insert sobbing noises>

One of the Pups’ final tests includes trying to stick a sign to the back of a howler without being noticed

Just. Imagine the chaos of trying to middle-school prank the solar system’s deadliest killers

Alex almost won once, then Pebble noticed a disturbance in the force (read: Alex in full stealth gear dangling above her bed attempting to put a sticky note on her back) and responded as if it were a Real Genuine Threat and. Well

He had a phenomenal shiner for weeks and smelled like beetle shit for even longer. Nobody but Rhonna would go near him

Lysander unironically read those god-awful self help books and kept leaving copies of Atomic Habits in Cassius’ quarters in an attempt to drop a hint

[presidentroarie]

Sophie calling Fitz "shawty"

That's it. That's the post.

[whtybsshe]

Ino and Neji except Neji is definitely not straight

[bushelofmuses]

When Cole first joins the Inquisition they trick him into crossing a river and the party wrastles him into submission to wash him. Teamwork makes the dream work

[helenpace]

Honestly while I not ship it in romantic way I think it would would be really funny if Minthara actually didn’t see anything wrong in Gortash as a politician whatsoever. Imagine this poor -1 intelligence girlie being his fan and thinking of him as extremely trustworthy person😭😭😭😭

I mean, it’s already half-canon…

[iaimforstress]

New crack idea

Isaac and Jenkins singing Roxanne and Nigel having no clue what is going on.

[btheleaf]

It's deliciously fucked up to think about.

Tenzin gets all the praise for continuing the line of airbenders.

Two NON BENDERS are the parents of this child.

The Pemumi age gap 💀 (we know Pema doesn't care. She likes a sad older man).

Bumi thinks his legacy is just his career when it's also an airbender who mastered her element at the age of eleven years old.

The implications that her spiritual prowess came from Bumi and not Tenzin.

[blogquestionmark]

Pixal's robot voice is actually fake as you can hear when she shrieks in s3 her screams sounds different than her "normal" voice and even sound human-like

[shitpost-it-tristan]

I cant fucking believe-

Yall, I woke up in a cold sweat at 4 IN THE MORNING and my crackhead brain has one thought.

"When fix it felix gets a boner, it makes the same Ding noise that his hammer makes when he taps something with it"

My life is SPIRALING. 4am and the only thing going on up in my head is thoughts of 8 bit handyman dick????

[0isms]

“…”

You might be wondering how he ended up like this.

[perkymatthews]

any lord in black (maybe humanized idk) roommate hcs cause i think thatd be v funny

💙💜💛🩷💚 WELCOME TO THE CHAOS WORLD MOTHERFUCKER 💙💜💛🩷💚

- God help you you're sharing a flat with five forces of darkness

- Nibbly eats you on day 4

[presidentroarie]

I saw a screenshot of a post on Pinterest that was talking about how elves proposed and someone said that they probably do it in all different ways depending on the couple, and my original thought was that Fitz would probably do the human way because it ties into Sophie's heritage, but then I had a better idea:

Penguin mode Fitz. Look me dead in my eyes and tell me he wouldn't. You can't for one because you can't see my eyes and for another because I'm right.

His love language is gift giving. He gets things for people because it makes them happy. He sees a pretty rock and knows Sophie would love it. And then, when he gives it to her, he gets on a tangent about how he saw it and thought that she'd love it and how it's actually such a perfect representation of them and then asks her.

Imagine how fucking thrown Sophie would be because she knew he'd be proposing but she didn't see the penguin proposal coming.

Bonus points if he has a ring in the sock drawer and he planned out the day and everything but then he goes screw it and just rolls with it and then later while they're watching a movie or something he's like "hold up, this is for you" and pulls out the ring and Sophie just laughs.

[howlsmoonhaven]

An AU in which the one ring is the one sword.

Thanks to @cilil for sharing this au with me, I have been laughing my ass off for 10 minutes now PIOJEDFSMOIJG ( the master sword is here for a specific reason kekekesiodfjælosid )

It began with the forging of the Great swords. Three were given to the Elves, immortal, wisest and fairest of all beings. Seven to the Dwarf lords, great miners and craftsmen of the mountain halls. And nine, nine swords were gifted to the race of men, who, above all else, desire power. But they were, all of them, deceived, for another sword was made. In the land of Mordor, in the fires of Mount Doom, the Dark Lord Sauron forged in secret a master sword, to control all others. And into this sword he poured his cruelty, his malice and his will to dominate all life. One sword to rule them all.

This sword is able to speak with it's wielder and boy is it SASSY to anyone that isn't it's master or his husband vala, Morgoth.

Some interactions with characters:

The one sword: "Frodo, you are swinging THE WRONG WAY"

The one sword: "Dear Morgoth, my master could do better than this."

The one sword: ".... ew no" Gollum: "Precious sword... my precious" The one sword: "GET MEEEE OOUUT OF HERE OMFG"

The one sword: "Only one being is allowed to call me precious and that is my master, the dark lord Sauron, and the dark lord Sauron only."

Imagine someone like Legolas picking up the sword Lmfao, the reaction.

Option 1: "oh hello a fellow gay"

Option 2: "A filthy elf, with such a lanky stature and- why are you looking at me so weirdly, why do I smell daddy issues? Oh wait I sense... Oh, you're gay. Well I suppose this is alright, hmmm. Yeah, I'll let this one pass."

Gimli: ( Picks up the one sword ) The one sword: "Get your grimy fingers off of my hilt!"

Gandalf: ( Picks up the one sword ) The one sword: "Oh, you touch me? No." ( Burns at the hilt )

Frodo: ( Struggling to pick up the one sword ) The one sword: "Ah, hobbits, I missed them. Not. Now take me to my master!"

Bilbo: ( Picking up the one sword for the first time ) The one sword: "At least this hobbit doesn't look like a rotten tapeworm with giant blue glass balls for eyes."

Sauron: ( Picks up his sword ) The one sword: ( Moans ) Sauron: "You like that don't you precious."

Note: More details in the future, this is focused on the funny interactions OIÆJEFDÆOIJDFÆOIJ

[bushelofmuses]

//Modern verse Ameridan in dad socks and sandals.