#Dev’s decrees

[kaizokuniichan]

We as a society should discuss Movie 6 Zoro more

[kaizokuniichan]

I wanted to come back to this! Thank you @stargirldelight and @throwmethroughawindow so much for the tag lovely!!

Last song: Pressure - Bree Runway

Favorite Color: I cycle through fav colors like every 6 months so right now I’m in my lilac purple era 💜

Last movie/tv show: currently watching The Boys (like right this very moment), and I think the last movie I watched was Talk To Me (I finally was brave enough to watch it and it was worth it!)

Sweet/spicy/savory: I used to be a sweets girly but every since I hit my thirties it’s all about the savory. And I could never handle spicy 😔

Relationship status: Untouched (it’s been a year 😭)

Last thing I googled: Erica Dixson 💀

Current Obsession: Red Lobster snow crab legs. I think about them a ridiculous amount and don’t make nearly enough money to be eating them as much as I do. Did you know they have a special on Tuesdays when you can get a pound for $20?

This was so fun!! No pressure tags @pamakali @saidbysae @sunshinescribes @mandiemegatron @kikouku @bby-deerling

Nine people I'd like to get to know better

Tagged by @meghawhopp <33

Last song: Down by the River by Borislav Slavov from the Baldur’s Gate 3 Soundtrack (or more specifically the cover of Down by the River by Nerissa Ravencroft)

Favorite color: Blue and purple!

Last movie/TV show: Seinfeld, I’m currently on season four!

Sweet/spicy/savory?: I have a huge sweet tooth, so sweet things

Relationship status: Single

Last thing I googled: I searched up the show “Arthur” because I was trying to find that one meme where Buster was like “You really think someone would do that, just go on the internet and spread lies?”

Current obsession: Fragaria memories and tears of themis mostly^^

Tag Nine People: @kyaruun @xinieeee @deadmansbistro @florapot @hunita812 @scuffle-with-spirals @rexonalapis @maxellera @manicpixiedoomedgirl

[askcombatking]

(GOING TO DO MY REDESIGN B. XERROZ YIPEE)

" I've noticed some things of your army that needs improvement , no offense about it of course . But you need snipers ... like me. There's a huge potential of having snipers and the asylumers are everywhere so you'll need some. "

(Redesign) b. Xerroz did kinda point but combat king did knew they were the most dangerous and wanted sniper after all , meaning their a threat to the JPX . . .

" So would you want me to train some ? I am the greatest sniper from what people call me . "

Combat king had to think . . . Since they are a beta dev should he trust them ? But (Redesign) b. Xerroz did shot one of the JPX developers which was xerroz which means they were more powerful than he thought . . .

"Snipers are cowards."

*The king doesn't give second thought upon speaking*

"If you're gonna fight, you fight like a warrior. Not by staying on the far part of the battlefield. Snipers are cheaters and will always be."

". . .And we already have snipers. Never heard of the Uncertified Backliners?"

[devotionmaniac]

Got the ball rolling on Chittr Hijack chapter 2! It should hopefully be finished and posted sometime this month? Don't quote me on that tho!

[westbifire]

I think the Senobium is inspired by The Grand Library of Baghdad aka The House of Wisdom

I imagine this is what the rest of the Senobium looks like from up high, the circular wall and the tower in the middle.

If the Senobium was inspired through architecture and as a school by the House of Wisdom its not to farfetched to assume its similar in other ways.

So what was the Grand Library of Baghdad? Like the Senobium it was an academy and one of the world's largest public libraries during the Islamic Golden Age. Before it was a public library it was private collection of the second Abbasid caliph al-Mansur (al Mansur means conqueror). This collection housed more than 400,000 rare books from around the world. These books contained newly discovered and ancient information on philosophy, mathematics, medicine, astronomy, astrology, and physics.

Later under the decree of Abbasid caliph al-Ma'mun this collection became an academy and public library where writers, translators, authors, scientists, and scribes (of all backgrounds and religions) would meet daily for translations (of the books to Arabic), writing, reading, and converse with each other. It would remain like this for more then two centuries.

Unfortunately the House of Wisdom was destroyed in 1258 during the Mongol siege of Baghdad. The books from Baghdad's libraries were thrown into the Tigris River in such quantities that the river was said to have run black with the ink from their pages.

Thats all I got, hope yall liked the history info dump. I dont know for sure if the Senobium is inspired by this Library. If it is it would be cool to see how the devs would incorporate the libraries rich history and destruction in a fantasy setting.

[kaizokuniichan]

Ahhh I love this! Thanks for the tag @stargirldelight 💜

1. I have a true affinity for connecting with people, even when I don’t mean too 😂

2. I have shown much strength and determination this year

3. I have a good sense of style and an artistic eye

All my favs have already been tagged 😂

NORMALISE SPEAKING HIGHLY OF YOURSELF

Let's exercise some self-love because we all need it!

I dare you to say three things you like about yourself and tag your friends so they can appreciate themselves too. ♡

---

Okay, I'll go first! 🙈

1. I'm musically talented. ♡

2. I don't look my age. ;)

3. I'm a great cook and baker.

Tagging @valyrra @esolean @finalgirllx and @subastian-swallows to force them to admit how awesome they are! Get loved btches! ♡♡♡

[echodoctor]

As per the game dev, Siffrin canonically gets a lot of Sisyphus symbolism. The endless repetition, the struggle with rocks (and Rock-types), the way that their situation is ultimately a trap made by their own nature- it's even what Adrienne based their name on.

But why should they get all the fun?

I think their fellow Time Craft user/mortal enemy also deserves some fun(?) mythological symbolism- and as it happens, there's someone right beside Sisyphus in the maximum security Boy You Fucked Up Bad wing of Hades serving his own sentence of ironic afterlife punishment that I think fits the King quite nicely!

If Siffrin is Sisyphus, I think the King is Tantalus.

The man who killed his own son and tried to feed his cooked remains to the gods, condemned to eternal hunger and thirst as punishment. Standing in clear water up to his waist with branches of ripe fruit just overhead, only for the water to recede and the tree to pull out of his grasp whenever he tries to reach for either.

In other words, someone condemned to spend forever seeing something he desperately wants right there, almost in his grasp, only to have it yanked away from him every single time.

Which isn't not like being a villain trying to freeze a country in time, only to have the socially maladjusted twink that God loves better than you rewind the timeline every time you're about to win. You know, symbolically.

By decree of the heavens, what he wants will always be just out of reach.

[quiven]

The Art of Deception, chapter 14: Blur

Image source and credit: Dev Mystra on Facebook

Chapter 14: Blur is out for for The Art of Deception on AO3.

Three years after the war. The society of wizarding Britain is on the edge of another collapse. Birthrates are dwindling and the Ministry of Magic is struggling to contain the panic. Thus, one of the most invasive decrees in modern wizarding history is born. Marriage becomes law in all but name, binding couples under the Consumator to secure the survival of wizardkind. Old prejudices are replaced by new oppressions, and women bear the brunt of a society desperate to control them.

Faced with the grim realities of this new world, Hermione Granger finds herself cornered. That is, until Draco Malfoy unexpectedly offers her a way out.

She takes a breath. “You think I should marry someone?” His reflection holds hers and for a moment the only sound is the hum of distant conversation beyond the corridor. “No,” he says at last. “Not someone. Marry me.”

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61501132/chapters/169817458

[kaizokuniichan]

Just thinking about Zoro giving you back rubs when you finally get to lay together at the end of the day

His hands were a place of refuge, a place of safety. Roughened from battle, blunt and calloused, every drag over your skin was a reminder of the many lengths he would go for you. His big and heavy hands, weighted with victories and discipline. And how lucky you were, having those hands creeping along your shoulders, up your neck, and down your spine. His mighty, yet careful hands.

It was a mystery to him, how his hands could be loved. You were far too soft to be tainted by their touch. But you’d guided him during one of the many nights where you lied together—skin bare and cradled within each other’s arms. In a tentative display he’d given you a taste—cupping your nape with a brush of his thumb along your cheek.

“That feels so nice Zoro.”

“Does it? I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“It’s ok. Just do what feels right.”

Such intoxicating sweetness, gifted by his hands. A simple swipe of his fingers which strummed your nerves, encasing your body in blankets of affection. Embarrassingly you’d purred, rubbing your face into his palm and urging him to touch you more.

It was your unspoken routine when the final sighs of the day laid the path to night. Your well-worn body slunk into the mattress to join him, curling under his arm and nestling into his shelter. He’d strip you of your shirt, hands taking great care to soothe and press into your back, soldering off the day’s aches and stresses. Applying pressure in places that needed reassurance—little reminders of their devotion to you.

He was a man who required the teachings of intimacy. Luckily every practice and lesson was placed into his hands.

(Divider by @/cafekitsune)

[anonymousreader4d7]

hiiii so what did you mean in the tags of that gladiator post recently???? (re: RMAU-verse Imp and Skizz backstory) because i am Looking 👀

*bouncing SUPER excitedly* OKAY! Okay, okay, so! First off, thank you SO much for asking!!! I was hoping someone would!!! Second! Let's preface the full answer with a little bit of RMAU-Verse timeline lore! (Yes I have a timeline Doc that starts from the beginning of the universe/multiverse in the RMAU-Verse... No, you don't need the whole thing for this... ...I don't think you realize the can of worms you opened here, lol. I could ramble about the RMAU-Verse all day, but I will restrain myself for now!)

So! Quick and dirty RMAU timeline that's important to this ask! Before Notch created the first world, the Primordials existed in the Abyss (sort of a... First and True Void). After most of the universe building has happened and most species have come into existence in their various ways, and Notch has stepped back and let the Pantheon of Developers take over "management" of his worlds, the Primordials in the Abyss that are like, the most stereotypically "Eldritch" (mindlessly hungry/destructive), begin to creep out of the Abyss and into the Worlds, leading to a Developer decreed and Admin led Hunt of Primordials. The banishment of the final Primordials at the end of the Hunt led to a Rift being torn into the Abyss and Deep Void (the void between the Abyss and basically the in-game Void, where RMAU-Verse Voidwalkers reside) - this Rift caused the spawning of the first Demons, and in response to their spawning comes the spawning of the first Angels - one Angel for each of the first seven Demons, the origin of each subclass/subspecies of Demon. These first Demons are, because of the Rift being the cause of their spawning, are particularly chaotic, it's literally encoded into them. So, the Angels vow to balance the chaos of their corresponding Demons - which leads to the Cosmic War between (mostly) them that is only de-escalated ages later after much negotiation between both sides AND the Devs and Admins. (There is a LOT more going on during this timeframe but it's more Xisuma centered than Imp and Skizz relevant, lol.) But anyways, after the... Essentially cease-fire, the vow of the Angels shifts from a "I will balance the chaos of MY demon" to "WE will balance the chaos of ALL demons", which leads to a lot of, like, placid-ness and self-isolation in both races, and even via elemental alignment in each individual race. Another thing that came from the train of Primordial Hunt to Demon Hunt was the creation of Hunters as a group - first to hunt Primordials, then many switched to hunting demons during the Cosmic War, and after that, eventually Hybrid Hunters evolved out of them. Hybrid Hunters are... Pretty much what they sound like - mercenaries that hunt hybrids, usually whether they've done anything wrong or not. (By the time of the main timeframe of RMAU, most groups of Hybrid Hunters have either been disbanded, are very small and minor, have been repurposed into an official, Dev over-seen sheriff's/ranger's-like office that hunt hackers and such no matter species, or have hunkered down so deep in the underworld/black market that no one really sees them or sees them coming.)

ANYWAYS, all that to preface what you were REALLY asking - Imp and Skizz, gladiators??? So! Both Impulse and Skizz are... On the young side of their species, but more than that, they're each... Odd. They don't fit the usual mindsets and views of Angels and Demons - Skizz being not very "submissive" to the "Universe" and his element as Angels "should be" according to his Garrison, while Impulse is too... "passive" in his use of his element and a little to interested in things other than pranks for his Troupe - and so they're left on the outskirts of their respective (and separate) groups, a little shunned and outcast. So, when they're each individually captured by Hybrid Hunters, and a powerful group at that, no rescue attempts are made - and they each know that. There is no rescue coming for them.

This particular band of Hunters runs a major underground fighting ring (think a cross between illegal dogfighting and a gladiatorial arena but with hybrids). So, they're each individually brought to the ring - and then they're locked in cages next to each other. A situation where the presence of the other species locks their instincts into a haywire aggressive state… Or it would if it were any other demon or angel… But they're Antipodes. (If you haven't seen my Antipodes lore, it's an Angel and a Demon who shared a moment of spawn/spawned because of each other, perfect opposites - I have a more detailed explanation in my Angels and Demons species notes which you can find from my master post in my pinned post) And because they're Antipodes, while they do feel the aggressive fighting instinct of proximity with their opposite species, it's not to the point of irrationality and they're able to push through it, especially the longer they spend in proximity.

Over time, they begin warming up to and talking to each other, comforting each other between fights and learning about each other. And eventually, as the fights get worse and they slowly get a creeping feeling of dread, that things are about to get so so much worse, they decide they won't stay here any longer, that they have to escape. So they start discussing plans to escape, but it all hinges on them being able to be out at the same time, which never happens.

Until one day, they're both grabbed, and they're shoved into the ring across from each other. The announcer’s voice rings out above them, hyping the crowd for a fight between an Angel and a Demon, a fight that's supposed to be to the death…

While they never had the chance to discuss this scenario, somehow, they just know what the plan is. They put on a good show, an excellent one, and yet, somehow they just know exactly what the other is about to do, and how to avoid the most damage while still being completely convincing, they just know what the other is about to do and how to react… And when the show has gone on long enough, they fake a win. Everyone expects the demon to be the more dangerous one, the one to win, the one to watch out for, so that's what they play up. Because Skizz is tired of this, and angels weren't always peaceful beings - they came into existence to balance and control the demons, they're warriors at their cores no matter how long it's been since they were truly called to fight…

So they pretend that Impulse defeated Skizz, and Skizz plays dead - so that when the Hunters come into the ring to recapture Impulse and clear the sand, they don't expect Skizz's attack. The Angel is fierce, teetering on the edge of bloodlust as he starts their fight for freedom - Impulse is only a beat behind him, waiting just long enough for their attention to be drawn away from him so he has an opening. And they do fight their way out, having learned from their time in the ring, their time as captives, both how to fight and how the Hunters work, letting them not only escape, but collapse the ring from the inside and free the other captive hybrids.

When the dust settles after their escape, it's just the two of them. They each know there's no point going back to their respective kinds, and they each couldn't bear to be parted now. Besides, as Skizz says, they made a great team… so they decide to stick together, and see where the world takes them.

So, to sum all of that up in a quick sentence: They, after being captured, met in basically a gladiatorial ring, and escaped when they were forced to fight each other.

The idea of them being captured and forced to fight in a gladiator arena being how they met is actually inspired by a Team TIES Fantasy AU I read called "tying down friendships" by @stormsaia... I loved the premise and got MAJORLY hit with inspiration for my own AU after/while reading it... (And also, as I've said before, my Primordials and thus also some of my Xisuma stuff is heavily inspired by @mawofthemagnetar's Eldritch Horror Keralis series.) (hopefully neither of you mind being tagged here as my inspirations!!!)

And so, that's more or less the answer to your question! Thank you again SO much for asking, I LOVED getting to ramble about this idea I have for how they met and part of why they are the way they are... (especially in their main fic I'm working on; it's prequel which would actually come not too long after this instance, actually; a piece I started during Skizz Week 2 ages ago but haven't finished; and also a... fic that has them facing... metaphorical "demons" from their past... *wink wink*) I'm always happy to answer questions about the RMAU-Verse (especially Imp and Skizz centric ones) so again, thank you so much for asking, I hope you enjoyed the answer!!!

[thechrysanthecandle]

so I just got done watching a Chants of Sennaar playthrough and

[5] But the Lord came down to look at the city and the tower the people were building. [6] “Look!” he said. “The people are united, and they all speak the same language. After this, nothing they set out to do will be impossible for them! [7] Come, let’s go down and confuse the people with different languages. Then they won’t be able to understand each other.”

—‭‭ Genesis 11:5-7 NLT‬‬

this game really said, "i see your bullshit and i raise you a solid 'nah'" and i'm so here for it. not assuming the devs' affiliation of course, but this game is a perfect deconstruction tool. like the player is actively undoing the damage that a powerful being caused when it put it's own selfish wants and desperation for worship over the well-being of humanity.

Exile used its abilities to foster prejudice and an environment of non-communication in the tower, and by doing so it ensured that it would remain safely/securely in power. after the traveler begins translating the languages and reuniting the floors, Exile begins to panic. it knows that this unity, humans working together for the greater good of all, would spell it's downfall/irrelevance.

“The people are united, and they all speak the same language. After this, nothing they set out to do will be impossible for them!

Only in a villain's mind would a united and organized people be a bad thing. In the bible, god took away people's ability to communicate with one another because he knew they would prosper together. but he also knew that this prosperity would mean they wouldn't need to rely solely on him. they accomplish great things by their own powers.

now imagine a villain in a story where their whole schtick is that they purposely cripple and abuse their own children. And the reason they (the villain) do so is because they want to continue being relied on and fawned over. everybody would be calling that character what they are; an abuser, a jealous narcissist, a psychopath.

but because we've slapped the label of "god" over those titles instead, people don't want to admit the truth of yahweh's character. christianity demands we read Genesis 11 and say "that's a father who loves us more than anything" and Chants of Sennaar shows is what that logic looks like played out. it's fucking insane.

and not only is it an analysis of yahweh's decree and actions, but it holds our hand as we actively undo/deconstruct/fix the damage done by it. at the end this game says "humans working together to make life better without fear of a narcissistic dictator is good actually" and i think that's real cool.

i love this game.

[mindblownie2]

after finally watching a playthrough of Quarantine, my thoughts:

PROS:

I'm glad we are still walking around town and interacting with people on the streets, since some early interviews made it seem like that won't be the case

I love the mechanic of pointing a gun at people to make them halt and then running away, it feels very tense and also realistic that you can intimidate them to buy time but they can still stab you in the back when you turn around, but at the same time maybe you don't want to just murder everyone on sight... That was good I liked that.

Affecting the state of things in town with the decrees is also cool, great potential for agonizing over choosing from two bad decisions and getting yourself screwed over with unforeseen consequences and so on

Eva is wearing clothes again yaaay congratulations IPL you did it

Speaking of Eva I also love coming back to her at the end of the day and talking with her, bouncing ideas off of her but also getting to know her better, it's something I've always liked to imagine happening but was only in the realm of headcanon until now. Also the more they bond the more devastating her death will be and I love pain <3

I think the dialogues were decent and a good gradient of asshole to kind-hearted to choose from

The POV switching is interesting too!

Oh I also saw that only once in the letsplay I watched, but it seemed like maxing out apathy resulted in this film reel filter and I liked that on like, a symbolic level? Idk something something surrendering your agency and just going through the motions like a character on screen rather than taking active decisions to affect events

CONS:

I can already tell I'm gonna be so sick of Yakov Little. Surely there were less grating ways to incorporate a tutorial. Especially with the nonlinear framing, say a flashback to Daniil being a student and being instructed how to do a diagnosis?

While on paper I think replacing the survival stats with the mental state slider is cool, I really don't think it's well executed. The bar fills up way too fast, so you have to deal with it almost constantly, which is just distracting, like how often you're breaking up whatever you're doing to open the inventory to eat some drugs is just annoying, and stuff like kicking a trashcan so you don't kill yourself is just so unserious. I think it would have been better if getting too far or spending too much time in either extreme would affect the tone of your dialogue or the availability of quests or certain actions, but not prevent you from playing. This way it could be a trade off, neglect your wellbeing to achieve something and then deal with the consequences, or a way to explore different facets of your character, or affect the course of the story. Maybe the game could keep track of some points you accrue by maxing out apathy/mania, and this could affect the ending, like maybe you unlock a wild swing reckless decision with mania points, or end up with The Suicide Ending if you have too much apathy (and preserve the impact of something like that happening, because if you can shoot yourself at any point when your extremely fast depression counter runs out, it is going to very quickly lose meaning or emotional effect and become just an annoyance). And if they don't tweak it that will suck because it's like, the biggest new thing about the game and has the potential to make or break the experience for me

This is a smaller thing but I had a viscerally hateful reaction to how Barbie doll beauty influencer looking Serafima's face is. Game devs look at real women challenge. At least the glasses cover it up a little bit

THINGS I'M ON THE FENCE ABOUT

I think the diagnosis mechanic is an interesting novelty, but it does take a lot of time, especially when having to go across town to investigate the patient's house, and I'm a little worried it might get boring/a chore if you have to do it too much and it takes away from other plot points. I do like how it serves to flesh out random NPC's though, makes the townsfolk feel so much more alive and real, especially in comparison with how cardboard cutout everyone felt to me in P2

The capital/Thanatica... Man idk. Some of those bits were cool, some details I liked less, and I still feel like I preferred to have it all left to my imagination, but I guess it could've been worse...

The burning woman apparition was scary (which is good) and I like the theory that it's a hallucination from seeing the bone stake lot incident, if that's true I'm glad we're finally acknowledging how traumatising this must've been to witness, but I feel like any mechanic of fighting her kinda cheapens it. Should be just something you maybe briefly see in bonfires and question your sanity rather than a monster chase, imo.

The whole time travel bit, I'm still curious but also wary of how well it will be executed, guess we'll see.

[kaizokuniichan]

Me and @pamakali are kindred spirits bc wtf is this 😂

Not tagging but feel free to partake!

I'll have you know I've been personally victimized by this personality test :')

@sarchopathic @pamakali @davishater @little-butterfly-writes @hisbeautifulnightmare17 @janumun

[thanatika]

pathologic 3 thoughts... i almost made a post awhile ago about hoping that they incorporate frostpunk-like gameplay mechanics into the bachelor remake, if they really are going all in on getting rid of the fps survival elements and adding more town management and resource sim elements. and now i'm mad that i never actually wrote it, because it seems like pathologic 3 is going to be incorporating frostpunk-like mechanics into its town management. "shape their lives with your decrees" and all that.

though one resource that frostpunk never really deals in is currency, and i hope they lean on that for dankovsky's town management mechanics. in that long dev post back in 2022 or something, i remember an offhand mention about getting rid of the survival elements because dankovsky's position means he shouldn't have to struggle for food, healing items, or money... and for one thing, pathologic classic has him struggle easily without it feeling unrealistic, so i think they might as well have just said "we wanted to do something original instead of a reskin of the previous game" and left it at that. but with money specifically... even if dankovsky is put in control of funds due to his position (which he canonically is, there was just no fleshed out mechanic for it in the first game) the bigger question would be how to effectively use them? based on the original game, the amount of medicine and food and money was never quite enough, even when the town's nobility would finally hand it over after trying to ignore the problem. so you have access to resources, the real painful challenge comes from having to allocate them, whether it's an equal distribution that isn't enough to help anyone at all, or an unequal distribution where some are left out.

i'm imagining something like The Fund in pathologic 2, which was a very barebones mechanic of just "heal more people = get more money". the bachelor route is possibly going to be more hands on in its management, and more incriminatory towards you if resources run scarce due to mistakes or mismanagement.

and as for dankovsky's own survival, well, i guess he could be sitting pretty if he has access to all of the resources, and can just take however much he needs off the top. that's certainly what npcs are accusing him of doing throughout both games and the dlc. but is that really in character for him? you certainly have the option to do that, most explicitly with taking lara's money and running on day 2. but personally i think that characterization makes less sense than him trying to distribute as much as possible. not because i think he's such a great guy, but because:

a) why does the first game have so many side quests that hinge on him agreeing to go put his own life at risk and his own mission on hold just to save someone else for 0 reward, if it's out of character for him to do it? like taking over from all the ladies who agreed to test medicines, or going and getting shot at by soldiers to save the father of two random kids. what a waste of writing and scripting, if he really isn't "supposed" to do those things.

b) even if he doesn't give a shit about the town or its people (which his dialogue and quest logs imply he does care, up to a point), his whole purpose in trying to stop the plague is that it's his mandate from the powers that be, with the promise that they'll restore his lab to him if he succeeds. his lab that he canonically values so much that he equates losing it to his own death or suicide, all the way back from day 1. yeah, i think he'd deprive himself if he thought the resources might make the difference between saving it or not.

so i think that's also important to keep in mind for his motivations, because especially if they do end up removing the pressures of surviving against hunger and combat, the tension is kinda lost if we're supposed to think that he actually doesn't care about what he's trying to save, at least in the beginning.

[labyrinthe-exe]

laby_log 0.1

gosh. where do i even begin? yes i'm totally writing in lapslock, because that's just how i am... LOL

anyway, wow!

okay...

where do i begin?

last year i did a 100 day art challenge at the beginning of 2024, i totally knocked that out of the park. this isn't really a year wrap-up sort of post but i promise it's relevant! so, flashback to early 2024 in like april, i've been drawing 100 days back then and finished in april... and then for the rest of the year i spent it procrastinating...

i had FINALLY progressed my art, jumpstarted and kicked back into gear the budding sprouts of falling head over heels back in love with art... and i totally wanted to jump to the wind and just shout...

"HELL YEAH, I'M SO BACK!" and catapult myself into the most productive year of my life.

so did i end up actually keeping up with art? no. i arted very intermitted...ly... and then i worked on like everything else but art ( my mental health for instance, cause woo boy i went through a LOT of changes in 2024... but not gonna get into that, wow boy howdy totally a wild ride mentally... )

i ended up being inspired by artists that i follow and interact with, like wow :plead: they're literally all so amazing :sobbbb: crying all over the floor, for the fact they could all pull through, so could i!!!

i knew i wanted to do winter jam, i wanted to do and make visual novels and games... I HAVE LOTS OF AMBITIONS! but golly, gosh... am i a procrastinator... with a perfectionist streak...

i wanted to do spooktober, otome jam, etc and failed all those... that's why i was finally WINTER JAM WILL BE THE BEGINNING and it was!

in like three days i created a shitty visual novel demo called "it's only december, always december" about seasonal depression and it was like a psychological horror... i had LOFTY AMBITIONS! and it's not that i couldn't do them... its just the entire month of december was hectic... crazy... totally batshit insane... i was robbed of both time, mental energy, and my goals until i was nothing but a collection of ambition, fatigue, and all my wirings all sticking out... totally a not good sight!

but i promised myself, i will make a visual novel! so i got my ass up, collected the time that i had... and birthed up... "it's only december, always december" and finagled it on the last freaking day and WHAM BAM! that's the beginning of my wannabe villain origin story!!!

and thus after december ended ( finally ) it was decreed that january was to be born and it was 2025... THE TRUE BEGINNING of my totally super cool and amazing visual novel developer journey !!!

i decided like idk like 2-3 days into the year that i was going to make the most crazy and ambitious idea ever... for a complete newbie beginner fledgling dev... yes... i was going to make a gothic horror romance visual novel with SWAK ( sealed with a kiss jam )... with a whole whopping... you guessed it...

EIGHT WHOLE LOVE INTERESTS!

A MAP SYSTEM

POLY ENDINGS

A TOTALLY SUPER COOL PROTAGONIST ( CAIN my baby )

STAT BUILDING

AFFECTION POINTS

POINT AND CLICK MECHANICS

INSANITY COUNTERS

now if this sounds unrealistic, believe me, it is. LOL but i am nothing but incredibly idealistic... so i charged on with an idea! no programming knowledge! no idea how to make gui! and like literally no story or outline because i'm a fucking pantser! honestly, it started out pretty fun?

i concepted some gui, i made some progress and i was having fun thinking about and talking with dev friends about my totally wacky dreams! i spent the first week really researching gothic horror and like trying to get myself in gear, drawing concept art of beloved characters and trying to figure out the art direction i wanted to go for!!! this is where my first mistake was...

trying to change my art style!

my art style is naturally kind of super sketchy and retro inspired, my art direction was also super retro inspired: think matsumi inomata, castlevania, yuki nobuteru ( sorry if thats spelled horribly ) ... you know !!! vibes! but the thing is...

i'm still not a proficient artist, so consistency is something i really really struggle with UNFORTUNATELY!

pictured up here are sketches i went through, trying to design the love interests ( focalor, october ) and cain my beloved baby boy is the one that looks like griffith's child... yes i'm super aware of the resemblance but i swear they're totally not the same!

at this point, i was still super optimistic! i ended up discussing with a friend who told me some of my gui wants were possible!!! and also opening up renpy documentation and fully prepped to spam another friend w/ like a million programming questions... but also super excited to just tough it out! cause i _do_ love coding... mostly from a css/html background though...

i love learning though!

but golly, i underestimated how much the gui would send me into emotional turmoil. i was constantly second guessing myself like "does it actually look good? does it look nice? is this going to be slop just like always december was? am i going to give up? am i even cut out for game dev at all?" things like that...

keeping a positive mindset and taking care of my daily irl chores, spending time with friends, and being a cheerful person was kind of hard and especially as i hit a low point this past week...

i really really wasn't feeling up to par this week... i wondered if i sounded silly or irresponsible to my friends or like a totally dumb scatterbrain... i wondered if people looked at me like a totally naive super unrealistic nobody who would never achieve anything at all even dialing it back... i nearly spiraled!!! but...

good news though, i practically finished the gui!

but before that, i ended up drawing some more beloved characters in hopes to cheer my mood up and contemplate the story i would tell for yandere jam... and if i hadn't mentioned it before then... yes... i do plan to join jams literally all year and release a full game of always december for next winter jam!

it helps because i'm a hikikomori coded neet... i'm just trying to push myself into a more consistent schedule so thats why i'm doing the whole "go big or go home" because if i don't push myself like this, i'm just not going to do anything at all... so even if i fail or stumble, it helps me in the long run!

ta-dah!!! one part of the gui... i had so much lovely and amazing help from dev friends getting this all squared away from colors to how to shade better and encouragement to keep going! i love them so much ;--;

i spent like 2wks totally fluffing about, still haven't written jack shit ( but i'm confident in my writing ) and now venturing into sprites and background artwork!!! and since today is like 11 at night on the 17th... well i only barely hve 2 weeks left to get everything else squared away...

thank gosh, this is only supposed to be a demo! so all those lofty features i mentioned earlier... thats just for the full game! haha!

so where am i now? well...

ive made like two sprites! the gui and.... i'm a bit bummed out... i wanted to do full body but i decided today in the middle of drawing them after being unsatisfied and nearly crying over it...that i can just cut their knees off! :D ( which was suggested earlier but like in an actual cut their height down way cause they're all tall giant not human love interests )

it really sucked running into that roadbump, cause i realized i am lacking when it comes to my art... yes i know i'm improving but i am not proficient in full body and 3/4 angles and other angles at all and i really need to practice but i told myself i would try to get creative and look for other solutions... i did!

so now, i feel confident i can complete the rest of the cast... which i'm thinking that i'm cutting the demo interactables to just 4! which honestly is for the best and i can finish the next two tmrw or tonight... if i feel like drawing again..

but while i've hit hiccups and i'm not doing as much as i could be doing throughout the day... i am having a lot of fun! i'm learning a lot, what works for me and what doesn't... i'm learning that chatsims are actually massive ( i wanted to do one... i guess i'll hve to spend some time researching it ) and honestly... i haven't even TOUCHED music or audio but i'm excited to deep dive into that too...

and here's another side quest of art that i did while i was trying to improve my mood the other day... i really do yo-yo hard and while i wanted to cry today... i'm super glad i persevered... that's to say... uh... dont always do that LOL

OH! and here's what it was gonna look like if i managed to do all full bodies but i hated it cause like his feet was too big and his head was just- it was hard! okay!!! anyway... i'm also gonna have to learn proper marketing too but overall... i feel good? i feel like this year i will learn like super much like a million amount of knowledge...

i look forward to posting another log like idk next week ( don't hold me to that, i'm like all over the place... )

...and maybe i'll actually get up a site or post more art here or like on bsky... etc... but for now! i'm just doing my best to get a consistent schedule!

anyway, laby logging out <3

[askcombatking]

Honest opinion about tje beta devs :]

"A brave trio left to rot, manages to reignite from the ashes and prove themselves worthy fighters. I respect them and their strenght to keep moving even if they are alone.c

"Yet still. I can't help but see the monsters they were modelled after in those eyes."

"Either way. They have my respect."