#FUCKING. SHIRTLESS. WITH THE DUSTER

[ratspider]

this is not a horny post i'm just overcome by how uncomfortable that looks

[satancopilotsmytardis]

8 + Daddy kink, perhaps? 👀

Pairing: Shigadabi

Rating: E

Contents: Daddy kink, masturbation, anal fingering, anal sex, BDSM, multiple orgasms, praise kink, humiliation kink, aftercare, very brief mention of child abuse, light feminization, suicidal thoughts/tendencies (but in the 'I have been minorly inconvenienced and I am now writing my will, oh woe is me, you shall miss when I'm gone' kind of way)

It's such a goddamn cliche that he has a fucking daddy kink. Oh ho, the kid whose dad treated him like he was the whole world and then shifted to beating him, ignoring him, and then finally abandoning him to a gruesome death likes to call people 'daddy' while getting fucked? Big surprise. What's worse is that he didn't used to have a daddy kink. The first time he'd been getting fucked and his partner had growled, "You like having Daddy's cock in you, don't you, bitch?", Dabi had immediately recoiled, and the guy had been lucky to just walk away with second degree burns, unfinished, and alive. It had made his skin crawl and he'd felt vile. Had switched to just topping for a long while after that. Then it happened again. Was fucking a woman hard and they were both thoroughly enjoying it, and she'd been very, very vocal. He was sure they were gonna get someone pounding on her apartment door. But she'd screamed, "Harder, Daddy, harder!", and Dabi had immediately gone soft. Went from them both having a good time to neither of them finishing and having to part awkwardly because they both were very clear on why it had happened. The point is that he didn't used to have a daddy kink, it used to repulse him. 

It was some extra cruel twist of fate that it reared its ugly head when he'd developed a slightly insane and possibly suicidal crush on his weird boss. Apparently he and Spinner have two things in common, wanting to uphold Stain's ideology, and thinking that Tomura, bleeding, broken, shirtless, and his hair bleached white by his quirk, standing in the rubble of a ruined city-- was hot as fuck. The major difference is that Spinner is repressed as fuck and just thinks that he's super dedicated to Shigaraki's cause now, and not that he wants to fuck nasty with their Grand Commander. Dabi, on the other hand, knows exactly what he's about and he wants to be about Shigaraki on his dick or his dick inside of him. It's unfortunate, then, that the switch over to the PLF also came with a shit ton more work as they restructured things and Duster having to go away for a while to get treated because of the aforementioned broken and bleeding. Which means that Dabi is left, unable to see if he gets dusted for propositioning his boss, and frustratingly horny because he also didn't want to fuck one of the grunts and have Duster hear about that. He can't imagine Shig would take him seriously if he heard that he was racking up a non-arson related body count and then asked him to go to bed with him too. 

They've got plastic now though, private rooms, and everyone already knows not to bother him once he's left the main floor for work shit unless the police or heroes are about to break down the door, so he figures that he's good to get himself a dildo and a stroker and take care of himself. And that helps take the edge off, definitely. Manages to tide him over until Shig comes back from his first round of treatments, and Dabi doesn't waste any time. 

He waits until they're alone one night, finishing going over some of the reports that Duster's missed while he's been getting healed. When Shig stands to grab something from his desk, Dabi stands too, follows him and steps in close, and murmurs, "If I asked you to go to bed with me, would I get killed? Or would you just demote me?" 

Sees a flicker of surprise go through those pretty red eyes that they've gotten to see a lot more since Shig stopped wearing the nasty hands all over his face. And then they go so dark that Dabi's breath hitches in the back of his throat. "If you asked me," and Dabi feels the tables turn as Shigaraki moves closer to him. They're nearly the same height, Dabi is just a bit taller, but he doesn't feel it as Shigaraki's eyes drag over him. "I would take you to bed, and all you would have to worry about is telling me if I give you more than you can handle." 

They don't make it to bed. Dabi has never been happier to be a career slut because there is a sachet of lube in his coat pocket and Duster fucks him so good and hard against his desk that he accidentally leaves handprints burned into the surface. He cums three times and can't even move afterwards. Expects to be left there boneless until he can pull himself back together and find his scattered clothes, but instead Shig presses soft kisses along his cooling skin, waits for him to be coordinated enough to sit up, and then makes him stay put. He leaves for a few minutes and comes back with a cloth to clean him up with and a glass of water. Dabi tries to insist that he's fine, doesn't normally get anything like this, and it's kind of making something warm and shaky spread in his gut in a way he doesn't really get. But Tomura kisses him again, and he shuts up.

And maybe Dabi had been thinking that fucking Shig once would be a way to scratch that itch and get it out of his system. He was absolutely not expecting that Shigaraki would want this to be more than a one-time thing. That they would go from fucking whenever they got a chance to... dating in plan view of the PLF and League. And Tomura always takes care of him. Not just after sex, he does that too of course, cuddles and kisses, cleaning him up and making sure that he's all put back together with careful consideration that makes him a stupid puddle of good endorphins. But he also takes care of him when they're not in bed. He makes sure he gives himself time to eat when he would normally ignore it in favor of overloading his schedule with work and training. He does his best to make sure that Dabi is taking care of his health. He always checks in on him when he's being moody, and he holds him at night without being afraid of getting burned when he has a nightmare. He tells Dabi that he loves him in a month which should be too soon. It should make him recoil and reconsider what they're doing. Instead it makes him so needy that he practically throws himself at the other man, so desperate to show the things he can't say with his body.

Tomura fucks him slowly, but unrelentingly, trying to squeeze out every drop of pleasure from his body until he breaks. Dabi does break, it's just not in the way that he's expecting to.

Is writhing in their sheets, his lover's cock hitting all of the good places inside of him in a constant, unceasing rhythm as he toys with his cock, holding him, but not stroking, just squeezing a bit, just occasionally rubbing his thumb along his ladder. It's torture and Dabi needs to cum. He's on the verge of sobbing as he begs, "Please D--" cuts himself off with a sharp cry as humiliation surges through him and sends him over the edge, coating his stomach and Tomura's hand in cum. Tomura keeps fucking him, makes him cum again, fills him up, and then holds him close and keeps letting him know with every soft touch against his skin how loved he is. 

And Dabi has to cope with the fact that he is laying in his lover's arms, having a crisis because he'd almost called him 'daddy' as he'd been fucking into him so perfectly. 

He hopes that that's just an isolated incident, that some wire got crossed in his brain and it will go away, but it doesn't. It keeps flitting through his mind, when they're in bed together, when Dabi is needy and alone because Tomura still has other treatments to do. And it gets so bad that he decides that he has to fucking exorcise this from him like a fucking demon. Waits until Tomura is gone for a few days and takes out a few of their favorite toys and is determined to get this out of his system. 

He works himself up slowly, hands going over his seams, playing with his nipples, scraping his nails hard enough to leave red lines on his unburned skin. Gets himself so hot imagining that it's his lover's hands on him, his mouth, his cock sinking inside when he fills himself up with the dildo. And he feels it bubble up behind his lips again. This time he lets it slip out, "Ah, Daddy," and instead of having it bring everything to a screeching halt, it makes him hotter. He fucks himself harder, moaning and whining, begging for Tomura to give him more, but he's not even there, and he's not saying 'Tomura', he's saying 'daddy', over and over and over again. He cums harder than he thinks he ever has without a partner. And it's at that point he has to completely resign himself to the fact that he does, in fact, have a daddy kink. 

He is absolutely planning on just wasting away after that. He'll write his lover a goodbye note and leave behind a mangled, burned, but beautiful (to Tomura's bad taste) corpse for him. He does not want to examine why he's suddenly developed this kink. Why being treated with care, and cherished, and given respect and affection in equal measures, why feeling safe and secure in his lover's arms, had made him want to call him that. He's not doing it, so premature immolation it is. Which is why, when Tomura comes home the next day, Dabi is laying in their bed, somewhat despondent, having his last meal which is Toga's strawberry cheesecake ice cream. Duster takes one look at him and comes over to the bed, climbing in and pressing a kiss to the nape of his neck. 

"What's wrong, firefly?" 

"I'm killing myself later. You weren't supposed to come home until after I was done. I still expect you to cry over my body." 

Duster hums, pressing another kiss to his skin and then stealing a bite of the ice cream as well. "If it's your last day, then I want to pamper you before you go. If you let me, then I promise to weep over your body for hours and when I tear down the whole world, the first thing I'll do is start to rebuild things in your image, make sure the world knows you're my Hephaestion. Does that sound fair, baby?" 

"Okay," and he lets his lover press another kiss to his cheek and they finish the ice cream together. Then Duster kisses the lingering sweetness out of his mouth and makes him get up. Runs them a bath and fills it with the green tea melts that have been helping soothe some of the soreness of his seams. They stay in the tub until Dabi would have to use his quirk to keep the water the right temperature. 

Dabi is considering life again when they get out and Duster wraps him up in a fluffy towel, doting on him the whole time. Kisses and soft touches against his skin, murmured words of affection in his ear, until he's pretty sure he's going to turn into a puddle. Not going to even have the focus to set himself on fire if Tomura keeps this up. 

When his lover gets him back into their bed, Dabi threads his hands into his hair, trying to pull him closer, trying to get him between his legs. Tomura leans over him, one hand braced against his chest, keeping just far enough back to not let Dabi close the space between them. "Are you in a hurry, firefly? Or will you stick around long enough for me to give you a little death before you go?" 

"Tomura," he whines, glad that's the word falling from his lips. His lover doesn't laugh at him, but his lips are definitely curved into a smile against his when he finally closes the space between them. Dabi drags his nails down his back in retaliation, but it's not a good one. Tomura never gets mean unless he begs for that. He's too intent on spoiling him rotten. Never had a pleasure dom before, but he can't say that it hasn't been a wonderful change of pace. 

Has his lover's hands, his mouth, moving over his body then, knows every place to touch to turn Dabi into a needy, trembling mess against their sheets. There are moans slipping past his lips as Tomura kisses along his seams and teases his fingers along his cock, strokes his balls, and then finally grabs their lube and starts to rub his fingers against him. He mewls as they start to push in. He's so relaxed from the bath, from how sweet his lover has been, that it doesn't take long before he's got three working inside of him, every pass making his cock drip more steadily against his stomach. And it's good, of course it's good, it's never been anything less than good with Tomura, but he wants more. 

"D-- Duster," he manages to correct, playing it off as getting lost in the feeling of his fingers crooking so good against his prostate. But he knows what he wants to say, feels it sitting in his throat and making more heat leech out across his veins. 

"What is it, baby? Time for you to go? Guess this will have to be enough--" Definitely a teasing lilt to his voice as he presses a kiss to the seam curving over his side. "Too bad, I would have loved to give you my cock one more time." 

"Stay," he surrenders. 

"Are you sure, firefly? You were so bound and determined before." 

"Stay, please--" cuts it off. "I want it," Rocks back on his fingers, more than ready, "I can take it, please?" 

"Is that so?" And he crooks his fingers up hard enough that Dabi sees stars. Sends such a sharp jolt of pleasure through him that he slips. 

"Ah, please Daddy!" And then spills smoke because Duster is going very, very still against him. Because that teasing twist of his lips is gone, as is the warmth in his eyes. Fear and shame sour Dabi's gut sharply, and the minute that he stops feeling like the floor dropped out from under him, he's going to squirm out from beneath his lover and set himself on fire as soon as he leaves the bed. 

But Tomura composes himself faster, fucks his fingers into him one more time roughly as his other hand wraps around the back of his neck and draws him into a hard kiss. Dabi keens. His lover licks into his mouth like he wants to eat him alive, like the right flick of his tongue will draw that word out of his throat again as he pulls his fingers from his needy body to replace them with his cock. 

"Ask nicely, firefly." 

Has definitely melted his brain already because he doesn't hesitate this time, "Please give me your cock, Daddy," sounds like he's going to die without it. He might. 

Doesn't have to find out though because Tomura sinks inside of him as soon as the words are off his lips. Kisses him hard again as both of his hands resettle on his hips. Only gives him those few seconds to adjust before he's drawing his hips back and snapping them forward. Fucks into him hard and all Dabi can do, all he wants to do, is hold on and let him. They fuck hard, teeth bruising lips, hips bruising thighs, nails cutting open bloody lines along skin. And the entire time, whenever Dabi can catch a breath, he's letting go, spilling his shame between them, 

"Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!" And Tomura doesn't even flinch, devours that up just as readily as he has anything else that Dabi's offered him. But he's talking too, voice a growl in his ear. 

"That's it, fuck, you feel so good, sound so cute--" Makes Dabi's whole body even hotter from the praise, his cock aching and drooling constantly. Going to cum without needing a touch there if Tomura keeps talking like that, fucking him like this. "Wish you'd told me sooner, would have been happy to give you anything you want. Daddy's baby." His voice saturated with heat. "My princess."

Dabi arches off the sheets, muscles clenching tight, and his quirk makes his whole body feverish as he cums so hard he feels his release splatter against his chin as he moans, "Daddy!" One final time. Tomura follows him over, making him even fuller as they both come slowly through their orgasms and aftershocks. 

Not a surprise that Duster pulls himself together first. "'Daddy'? Is that why you were so upset? Baby, you can call me whatever you want." Lips against his cheek, which would be really sweet if he hadn't very clearly heard, 

"'Princess'?" 

Shig hums in the back of his throat, not one to cowed. "Didn't know if you would like that. Figured it could wait until we had a check-in. Already so cute, would love to have my baby girl crying for his Daddy's cock." Dabi's cock twitches, clearly a traitor and very, very on board for that idea. "But I suppose that won't happen if you're still planning on leaving me behind for that eternal sleep."

"Fucking me again right now," Dabi demands as forcefully as he can when he's a complete puddle in their bed. "But if anyone ever finds out about this, I'm taking us both out." 

Duster leans down and nuzzles their noses together, that smug little smile back on his face. "Can't imagine a better way to go, sweetheart. But you're going to have to drop that attitude. Only good girls get Daddy's cock, and you don't want to be empty, now do you, princess?" 

He shivers as his arousal surges through him again, "Please Daddy, I'll be good." 

Can't be as upset about the daddy kink as before, not when he and Shig damn near break the bed that night. Also not gonna have to worry about taking them both out in a shower of fire and ash because when Toga finds her missing ice cream, they're not gonna last long anyway. 

Thanks for submitting! The typing box is fueled by comments/replies, consider leaving one if you had fun!

[ploonia]

I love Harper she’s a goth punk fairy princess who “rules” over a dark forest she named Moonlight hallow when she was a teenager. She lets her people do whatever they want because she never really felt like a real ruler. Her sister also rule over small factions.

She has a dragon named primrose. But she also lives in a small trailer next to a swamp.

There is a city called Bracken (though I’m just trying to come up with a name it’s a wip) where all the ghouls and other creatures live and hang out and party.

Manny and Frank are in a synth rock duo band called Frank and Manny’s electric lullaby. Their songs consist of strange lyrical choices but it sounds good. Manny is the really creative mind with his synth piano and comes up with the most word salad style lyrics. While Frank just listens intently he doesn’t judge though he doesn’t seem like the type to be into it but he admires manny’s authenticity. Manny literally put his name first because he just likes him so much while Frank is the one who is like “I don’t want to impress anyone just you.”

There’s Ash and Emily who live in the forest Ash runs around his job is to reap lost souls but they’re just pesky little wisp like creatures he catches in his lantern. Emily is like a frankenstien’s monster made by a mad scientist who she never felt close to and when his lab burnt to the ground she was all that was left. Ash found her im the rubble alone and lost so he helped her rebuild her home. It’s looks put together like her no consistency in style or anything. She makes little dolls and he’s not supposed to but he brings her a few wisps for her to use she puts them in the dolls and they walk around and move they follow her like she is their mother. They’re girlfriendboyfriend :)

Then there is Daryl who is the leader of a small society out in the deep swamps in the place they call the big nasty. Stilted homes and wooden pathways that creak under your feet and in the center is a large ferry they stole. Him and his boys control the river that passes through and most avoid going through the hallow because of them saying that it’s gator territory. Oh yeah they’re gator men forgot to say that. Daryl wears pinstripe pants always shirtless with a thick leather belt but sometimes he wears a huge leather duster. His boys are rough and rowdy and cause so much trouble he insists he’s not their babysitter so it’s not his problem what they do. However he has a younger brother named Rocket who’s a cook on the ship he’s the nicest of the bunch. Imagine your going down the river and either you’re risking it or you don’t even realize where you are and you hear them coming on their little motor boats you can hear them hollering in the distance and now you know you’re fucked.

I like having fictional worlds that carry no consistency

[paristexas]

gender envy: dennis reynolds edition

[gaydennisreynolds]

be hot do crime: season 3, episode 6: the gang solves the north korea situation

Total Number of Shirts Worn By Dennis: 6

Total Number of Crimes Committed: 0…I guess. Another confounding episode.

Dennis and Charlie attempt to break into the “Pirate” office, but Pennsylvania doesn’t seem to have a charge for attempted breaking and entering? Frank also attempts to break in with a gun, but doesn't have to break in anywhere because Mr. Kim comes to the door. Also, Charlie gets engaged to a 12 year old, but they don’t kiss, have sex, or actually get married so he didn’t technically break any laws. Additionally, because Charlie and Dennis see Sun-Li working and smoking a cigarette, he would have evidence to support believing she's older. But IN MY HEART I feel like they should all catch charges for this shit.

Anyways, if you have a better understanding of bird law than me, feel free to chime in on this situation because I feel like I’m missing something.

Best Shirt: Unfortunately, Dennis was right when he said a fit guy in a duster was very sexual. His iliac furrows……………okay this is a public forum so I’ll stop.

Episode Rating (on hot/crime metrics ONLY): Baby boy is hot as fuck but all of the confusing crime-not-crime left a bad taste in my mouth. 7/10.

TOTAL SERIES CRIME TALLY: DENNIS (27), MAC (27), CHARLIE (20), DEE (16), FRANK (15)

All outfits worn by Dennis under the cut, in order of cuteness, with commentary.

THIS IS SUCH A GOOD FUCKING SHIRT HOLY SHIT. not to worry i'll make sure this makes it into the list of the top shirts. look at him.....soft and warm and cozy and striking. im gonna fuckin eat him

shirtless awkward lip bite moments before being bullied within an inch of his life. we Love to see it

the duster elevates the drab shirt underneath it. also he does a spin kick in the next frame and i can't help but be soft for my spinny guy

he wears this for .00002 seconds (its his undershirt and he's getting undressed for charlie and sun-li). hence the very blurry/weird screencap. i hate it but wanted to show it off b/c im proud for catching it

i haaaaaaaaaaaaaate you! i hate you. how does he keep finding progressively worse shades of brown to wear. peep their faces though.

[forlornmelody]

Kord Center Mall: Out In The Rain, In From The Cold

Rating: E (the nerdiest smut you’ll read all week.)

Fandom(s): DC Comics, Jack Nought from Mass Effect makes an appearance, but familiarity with the game is not important

Ship: Rose Wilson/Jason Todd, mentions of Jason/Roy/Jack

Linkage: Ao3

Summary:  Rose is finally ready to come clean with Jason, and admit the feelings she has for him. But is it too late?

Note: This is a cross over, mall-verse AU concocted by @scifi-ginger and myself. You’ve been warned. Also,  I just want to state, for the record, that I wrote this before Titans: E.L._.O. hit the internet. I have the Tumblr snippets to prove it.

–>–>

The ground’s so dry when she leaves Cassie’s, Rose doesn’t even think to grab a jacket on the way. By the time she reaches Jason and Roy’s apartment, the sky’s dumping car-wash levels of water on the bus. Even though it only takes her five minutes to walk to the building, Rose’s clothes are sticking to her when she rings the doorbell. Lightning cracks in the clouds behind her. 

Opening the door, Roy’s face flashes bright and dark as the thunder rolls around them. “Rose.”

“Roy.” Rose takes a breath. “Hey. Uh--”

“Fuck off,” Jack calls from the couch. “Jason doesn’t want to see you.”

Yeah. She deserves that. “Could you at least tell him I’m here?” Rose says it to Roy, not Jack. 

Lighting flashes two more times before Roy sighs. “Fine.” He holds up a hand to keep Jack back. “But I swear if you hurt him again--”

“Fuck, Roy. I’m here to apologize.” Rose glances at Jack as she steps gingerly through the doorway. “Nice to see you, too. Jack flips a finger in response. 

Just as Rose knocks on Jason’s door, the power goes out. “Oh come on!” Jason yells from the other side of the door, and she hears the crash of a controller hitting the floor and the rolling of batteries as they fall out. 

Rose has perfect timing. She clears her throat, reaching to knock a second time when Jason opens the door. His cellphone casts soft grey light along his jaw and highlights the sheen on his nose. “If you’re an axe-murderer, I’ll--Rose!?”

“Hey,” she says softly, pulling out her own phone to cast some light---only to realize it died on the way here. “Shit.” Better not fuck this up. 

Jason lingers in his doorway, his eyes roaming over her like she’ll vanish any second. “Didn’t expect to see you.”

“Yeah. Me either.” Rose dares to step closer, looking up at him. “Can I come in?” Jason hesitates ever so slightly, but it’s enough to kick Rose in the gut. She deserves that, too. 

“Sure.” He steps to the side, swinging his arm wide. Jason never kept a tidy room. Rose would constantly remake the bed before she left. If she brought pizza, she’d have to clear off the beer bottles and carefully move the bong out of the way. But Jason always took care of his books--bookmarking them, closing them gently and sorting them on the shelves by genre, author, title, routinely cleaning them with a fucking feather duster. At this point, Jason doesn’t even have a bedroom--he has a personal library with a bed in it. Right now--it looks like a tornado had swept through the shelves. 

“Fuck.” Rose muttered under her breath, frozen in the doorway. 

“Did you come here to talk, or to judge me?” Jason folds his arms, and Rose notices the bags under his eyes for the first time. She’s reaching to push the hair from his eyes before she catches herself. 

“To apologize,” Rose says quickly, ducking inside before Jason can change his mind. She finds a Complete Works of William Shakespeare lying open in the middle of his bed. Obviously, it’s too dark to read, but she’d know the size and thickness of that book anywhere. One of Jason’s favorites. 

Rose sets it aside, sitting on the edge of the bed with one foot draped across her lap. Jason lingers by the door, but he does close it behind him. His eyes track the movement of the book before daring to glance at her again. “Why’d you come back?”

“I missed you.” Rose says. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, she chants over and over in her brain, but “sorry” doesn’t feel good enough right now. Jason deserves the world, and Rose is just a tiny island wracked with storms. 

Jason’s eyes soften ever so slightly before they harden--cold as steel. “Missed what, exactly?”

Rose allows herself a small smile. Jason loves the big questions--meaning of life, origins of the universe, whether true love exists--he always has his head up in the clouds. Meanwhile Rose stands back on earth--rooted in doing things--going, doing, fucking, eating, breathing. The thunder outside nearly drowns out her words. “I missed the way your eyes change color when you’re angry, happy, or sad. The way you smile when you think no one is looking.” She itches to get closer to him--show him exactly how much he means to her, but it’s not her choice to make. “The way you forget the world around you when you’re reading.” Her voice thickens, with love or want--she isn’t sure. “The way your face lights up when Roy comes in the room.” 

Is it still raining? Rose isn’t sure. All she can hear is the thundering of her pulse in her ears and the sound of their breathing. Jason still hasn’t said a word or moved an inch--him and his fucking poker face. 

At first Rose thinks her eyes are straining to see him in the darkness, but then she feels a tear slip down her cheek. Damnit. This is why she doesn’t do this stuff. Love, real love, hurts. “I realized I didn’t want to live without that. I didn’t want to live without you. I don’t want to.” Jason probably can’t even understand what she’s saying at this point, with the way her breath keeps shaking her voice.

Jason finally looks away, and Rose nods to herself. Figures. It’s too late for them. It’s always too late. “Sorry,” she mutters, standing up and wiping her nose and eyes. It’s gonna be a bitch getting home in this weather, but she’ll manage. Rose always does. She’s halfway to the door when Jason grabs her hand. 

“Where’re you going?” he says softly, squeezing her hand. 

“I…” I’m going home, Rose says in her mind, but the words don’t ring true. She turns, daring to face him. “Not sure.” 

“Stay.” Jason tugs her ever so slightly, and she falls into his arms like she just jumped off a building. He reeks. Always has. Like dank weed and cheap beer. Rose wouldn’t have him any other way. 

“Jerk my arm why don’t you?” His laugh rumbles against her chest and she pulls back just enough to look at his face. Rose traces his features with her fingertips, reacquainting herself with the tip of his nose, the jut of his eyebrows, the firmness of his lips. 

Everything’s so desaturated in the dim room, but Jason’s eyes shine the brightest blue. “I love you, too.” 

Rose couldn’t tell who kissed who first. She’s too busy tasting his mouth and messing with his hair. Jason breaks for air, only to pay careful attention to where her jaw meets her neck. His hands roam her shoulders, arms, sides and stomach as if he can’t get enough of her. He has far too many clothes on. No zipper on Jason’s hoodie, so Rose lifts it to his shoulders, but he gets tangled in the sleeves. “Candles,” Rose says hoarsely. 

Jason peeks at her blankly through the bottom of his hoodie. 

“Please tell me you have some. Jack’s surely got enough to set the apartment on fire but I’m not keen on asking her tonight.”

“Be right back.” Jason frees himself of his shirt and hoodie, slipping out the door shirtless. 

Rose sits on the bed, unable to sit still, still humming with the thrill of his touch. She glances back at the Tome, and switches Jason’s phone’s flashlight on so she can finally read it. Jason has it open to Sonnet 87, 

“Farewell! thou art too dear for my possessing,

And like enough thou knowst thy estimate.

The Charter of thy worth gives thee releasing;

My bonds in thee are all determinate.

For how do I hold thee but by thy granting,

And for that riches where is my deserving?”

Rose swallows, reaching to close the book when Jason comes back inside--his arms full of candles. He freezes when he realizes what she's reading.

“Oh, hey. Lemme take care of that.” Jason sets the candles on his tv stand, reaching for the book.

Rose swats his hand. “Candles.”

Rolling his eyes, Jason replies. “Fine. Fine.” 

Leaning back, Rose watches as the candles, lit one by one, cast a soft glow along the lines of Jason’s body. She doubts she’ll ever tire of the view. 

Lighting the last candle, Jason whisks around, lighter still in his hand. He nods down at the book. “You weren’t supposed to see that.”

“Interesting choice. Real depressing.” Rose kicks her heels against his box spring. 

Setting the lighter aside, Jason grins slowly. “Actually. Hold on a sec.” He kneels, clearing a space on the floor. 

Rose stares at him. “No. Absolutely not. Your floor is a fucking mess.” 

“Don’t worry. You won’t be touching it.” Space cleared, Jason glances up at Rose. “Hand me Shakespeare.”

“Whatever.” Rose hefts it over, eyes widening as Jason sets it reverently in the space he cleared. “You’re shitting me.”

Jason snickers, shaking his head. “C’mon. The book may be hard, but the pages are soft.”

“Oh my god. I’m couching you for that.” Rose chides, but she gets down from the bed anyway. She glances at him one last time before sitting gently between the pages. 

“Better.” Jason’s eyes have darkened to a warm green. The fact that a dead playwright and poet makes him all hot and bothered never ceases to amuse her. “Lean back.”

Rose rolls her eyes, grabbing a pillow and stuffing it beneath her arms. 

Jason makes quick work of Rose jeans, shucking them off and tossing them across the room. Rose snorts as they take down a couple bottles in their fall. “Tell me if you’ve heard this one before.” His grins as he lowers himself to her neck. 

“What’s in a name?” Jason murmurs into her skin, his voice as reverent as a priest’s on Sunday. His fingers drag the zipper of her soaked hoodie down her chest, and goosebumps prick across her skin. 

“That which we call a rose

By any other name would smell as sweet.” Jason lavishes attention where her neck meets her shoulder, and Rose’s so caught up in his touch she almost doesn’t catch the reference. Almost. 

“Romeo and Juliet? Really?” she snorts, pulling back to give him a look of disdain. “Most overrated play ever.” 

“It’s a classic.” Jason pouts, his fingers edging underneath her t-shirt--a suitable challenge with the way the fabric sticks to her skin. He dives to kiss her collarbone. “And it has your name in it.”

“Jace, they off themselves because they’re impatient hormonal teenagers.” A moan slips from her mouth as he kisses from her waist to her chest, pushing her shirt up and out of the way. “It’s not romantic.”

Dragging the shirt and her bra up and over her head, Jason grins at her. Oh, he knows. “So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call’d.” 

“Do you put Jack and Roy through this? Or am I special?”

Jason doesn’t linger on her breasts, just moves her damp bra off her skin, hanging it on one of his bedposts. “Retain that dear perfection with he owes.” He plants a reverent kiss in the valley between them. 

“I am special, aren’t I?” Rose groans, for more reasons than one. 

Instead of answering, Jason snickers against her skin, breathing her in. “Without that title. Romeo doff thy name, and for that name which is no part of thee,”

Rose has another comeback coming, somewhere, but it’s hard enough trying to keep her breathing steady the farther south Jason travels with his mouth. He stops just north of her thighs, grinning up at her. “Oh, come on, already,” she groans again, letting her head fall back.

Jason wets his lips and tongue, waiting for her to look at him again. Once he has her full attention, he whispers, “Take all myself.”

Then he plants a kiss against her clit, and Rose shudders despite herself. “Really? You think some, some poetry is gonna, oh.” 

She can feel his grin as he toys with her licking gently around but never quite touching where she wants him most. His hair musses in her fingers as he kisses deeper, harder, licking her with nice, long strokes. Jason moans with her, the hum reverberating across her skin. Rose’s hips rise off the book and Jason holds her down with one arm. Pausing, Jason licks one finger, then another, and Rose can’t help but cry out his name as they thrust in and out of her while he lavishes attention on her clit. Fuck, she’s probably tearing his hair out, but she can’t help it. Now she’s so close she’s--

Jason pulls back, kissing her thigh, and Rose curses him and half his family. “I take thee at thy word:”

Fuck her, she’s pleading, pulling him back. “Jace, please. I need.”

Snickering, Jason plants a soothing kiss on her thigh before gathering her hands to her right side, holding them still. “Call me but love, and I’ll be new baptized;” he murmurs as he wets his lips again. Something in her belly roils as she realizes what he’s planning. 

Mm, yeah, Jack and Roy definitely heard that scream. Let them, Rose thinks, until she can’t anymore, so focused on Jason’s feather light touch against her clit. She’s so close to falling right off the cliff when he pulls back again. This time, Rose bites her tongue, shaking as she waits for him to continue. 

Jason watches her come down from the brink, his smile wide (and his lips covered in her slick), and his eyes bright. Part of Rose wants to hide from that look--she doesn’t deserve it--she’ll break his heart--he’ll find out what she’s really like and he won’t look at her like that any-- Squeezing her hands, Jason pulls Rose from her thoughts, and she swallows hard as she allows her walls to come crashing down. “Jason, I--”

“Shh. We’re almost there,” he whispers, kissing her hands, squeezing them again. Waiting until she’s relaxed again, Jason leans down one last time, his words barely audible, “Henceforth I never will be Romeo.” He brings her back slowly, using his fingers as well as his tongue, seemingly touching her anywhere and everywhere at once. Sliding one finger inside her, then another, he closes his eyes, gracing her with long, slow licks, pumping and curling. Rose isn’t even sure what sounds are coming out of her mouth anymore, as her hips rise and fall with his fingers.

Her world flashes whiter and hotter than lightning. 

Maybe seconds pass, maybe hours, when Rose finally opens her eyes. The candles have nearly guttered out, and Jason lies, with his clothed legs intertwined with her bare ones. Rose should pay him back for that--when she finds the energy. She leans her forehead against his, murmuring. “Power still out?”

“Yeah.” Jason reaches out, trailing a hand down her bare back. 

“You need to clean off the bed before the candles burn out.”

Jason groans, holding her tighter. “Fine.” He releases her standing up stiffly and reaching for the stuff scattered across his bed. “Love you too, Rose,” he muttered under his breath. 

Rose sits up quickly, grabbing his hand. “Wait.”

Looking down at her in exasperation, Jason asks blankly, “What?”

“I love you.” The words feel so strange coming off her tongue, but Rose knows them to be true. “Meant to say it earlier but you were too busy going down on me and quoting lines to listen.”

Jason pulls her to her feet, and into a kiss. “You can say it whenever you want.”

Rose’s so busy tasting herself on his lips she almost doesn’t notice the hiss of the guttering candles. “Shit.”

“What?” Jason pulls back, looking around at nothing. “Fuck.”

[oysters-aint-for-me]

fffffff ok this isn’t what’s going to happen bc rcg is not chris carter of x-files infamy but this is a hilarious concept i wanna share

i was thinking about how a lot of people keep saying something felt “off” about that last episode and 

what if s13e01 wasn’t reality, but instead it was dennis’s, like, fantasy of what happened to the gang after he left

they all miss him like crazy and are lost without him

they try to replace him with his exact opposite (an indian woman) and then he gets to prove that he’s better than her  

it explains why, when mac says something about being dennis’s best friend, dee and charlie are like “no that’s not true dennis didn’t even like mac that much” when we ALL saw “the gang tends bar” and we KNOW that charlie and dee are not THAT thick. but maybe it IS what dennis wants them to think—that he doens’t like mac—because, you know, ...internalized homophobia? fear of being loved? needing to seem unflappable? idk man, take your pick, this is a buffet-style conspiracy theory here

he manages to create a scenario (sex doll) in which he gets to completely influence them and their actions without being there or having to expend any effort 

gets to fuck up charlie’s relationship with the waitress (idk why, take your pick, maybe dennis thinks the waitress is lame and that charlie deserves better; BYOM [bring your own motivation])

gets to imagine frank playing a tuba and playing it pretty damn well (bc why wouldn’t you want to imagine that) even though we’ve never see frank play a tuba before. 

fantasies/dreams sometimes get out of hand so. that explains the orgy? or maybe that is really just what dennis fantasizes about. idk. i don’t judge. 

(well ok i would judge that)

and thus he’s able to replace the sex doll without the gang noticing, and wearing exactly the same clothing as the sex doll.

and he gets to come back and be completely cool about it, acting suave af, big dick energy, welcomed warmly by the gang without any conflict, no questions asked whatsoever, regaining control of the gang immediately 

and, the final and most important point, obviously dennis would fantasize a beefy mac who keeps poppin’ off his shirt. obviously he would imagine mac shirtless in the duster—we know that mac hates shirtless-in-the-duster, he doesn’t get the look. but dennis thinks it’s “very sexual” (see the north korea episode) so obviously that’s how he would fantasize about mac

now obviously there a number of reasons why this isn’t going to be the case (like we know mac is still a beefcake throughout the season so his pecs aren’t just gonna show up only in dennis’s fantasy; or that the description of the next episode talks abt “mac and dennis’s apartment”) and ALSO it’s a cheap narrative trick that i’m pretty sure rcg are too good for but lakjdfklajsdflk it’s so funny to think about 

[lesbianfreyja]

top 5 horny charlie rcg moments go!

charlie’s like….really committed to MEE and he doesn’t seem to share rob & glenn’s fixation with cucking…? so all of his horniness seems to come out in trying, desperately, to get his two best friends to fuck each other instead

“i’ve got the good lord going down on me!” / “does that make me gay? am i gay for god? you betcha.”

charlie and mac talking about getting hard and shoving things up their ass, which he wrote with rob

actually just casting his entire wife as the only person his character thirsts after for 15 years

mac and dennis: manhunters (2008)

everyone sharing the duster, but especially dennis walking up in a power pose to model it for mac shirtless

dennis in the gang gets racist

the general “dennis and charlie are dating” vibes in wants an abortion

the “mac & dennis share a joint bank account” business in buys a boat

dennis in america’s next top paddy’s billboard contest doing The Most to get mac to admit he’s sexy. also, the introduction of mac’s thirst for rex

the whole mac bangs dennis’ mom fiasco of everyone trying to fuck each other’s parents as a proxy for wanting to go down on each other

his foray into cucking with “the waitress is getting married”

that was a lot more than 5 but hes like, really into his 2 best friends doing gay shit. obligatory mention that he loses a LOT of horny points because when rob and glenn were b e g g i n g him to do a 10 minute full penetration sex scene, he said no :/ still an iconic ghgs 3 though

[satancopilotsmytardis]

hello hello!

Omg I just saw that there is a slot open for the kissing prompts and I was reading the SpiderShiggy fic again and,,, May I ask "lifiting your lover up" with ShigaDabi? The way you write Dabi all flurstered by Shiggy's strength is so good hsduaidfhuisdaf

As always your fics are amazing and I hope you have an amazing day <3

Prompt: Lifting Your Lover Up

Normal day at base. Dabi got in well past three in the morning from running his jobs, went to bed, woke up somewhere around noon, shoved whatever he could find downstairs into his mouth and gone to debrief with Duster. Nothing strange. All perfectly average and normal. Except the fact that Shigaraki hadn't been creeping in the bar working, sulking, or playing video games. So Dabi had knocked on his door instead. No answer, opened it just enough to peek inside and there was a stunning lack of mop-headed boss. Okay, so that was weird. He'd tracked down Kurogiri then. 

"Hey mist man, where's Duster?" 

And 'Giri had looked up from whatever he was reading. "I believe Tomura Shigaraki is down in the basement training." 

He'd raised a brow at that, but shrugged and went towards the basement stairs. Never seen Duster train before. How much training does a person who kills with a touch really need? Gone downstairs to give his report so he could do something else with the rest of his day. 

Had come down the stairs a while ago, he thinks. Can't really be sure because he's just been staring for a while. Probably shouldn't be. But Duster is training. Knew about the gym in the basement, assumed that it was more for their benefit, has never seen Shigaraki down here before. Has never seen Shigaraki shirtless before. Absolutely did not know that the pale skin beneath his long-sleeved shirts makes way for lean but well-defined muscle. Knew he was fast but didn't know he was strong. Has been watching him spar against Twice's doubles, easily as acrobatic as Compress and having absolutely no trouble destroying the clones of them as Twice produces them. Is still staring, his temperature having crept up a little higher, when Shigaraki and Twice call it for the day. Shig is sweating, but doesn't look tired, pushes his hair back and his eyes are bright and his lips twisted into a smile as he talks to Jin. Takes them both a second to notice him. 

"Yo, Dabi! Who invited him?" 

Shigaraki looks immediately more attentive, knows that he's come for a debrief. "Give me a second, I'll meet you upstairs," Duster tells him. 

"Yeah, sure, whatever." Really glad the attitude is a conditioned response at this point because his mouth is embarrassingly fucking dry as Shig rolls his shoulders and Dabi sees every muscle in his back fucking move. Holy shit. Yeah, quickly turns his ass around and goes back upstairs. Would absolutely not be able to explain himself if he starts smoking. 

Barely able to focus on the debriefing even when Shig meets him in the bar a few minutes later dressed normally. Can't stop thinking about the muscles hidden under his shirt. Is kind of wondering about what ones and what else might be hiding under his jeans too. 

///

It gets worse from there. Dabi manages to put the knowledge that Duster is secretly kind of ripped, and is absolutely hiding that behind his nerdy gamer schtick, away deep in the recesses of his mind. Absolutely not going to let himself be attracted to the creep. No fucking way. It was just a surprise and it really shouldn't have even been. Duster is obviously a close-combat fighter who's been training to be the next biggest supervillain in Japan for at least a decade. No fucking duh should he have at least some physical prowess to back that up. It was stupid of him to not have been expecting it. He moves on. 

Only he doesn't because knowing Shigaraki is strong and can fight is one thing. Seeing him using that strength is another entirely. 

Happens after a good job. Came back flushed with stolen tech that they're going to have reoutfitted into gear for them to use as they move forward. No one got hurt, they didn't even get spotted, and the take was fantastic. It is a rare moment when they're all in good moods and looking to celebrate. He's even in a good enough mood to stick around and they all have more than a couple of drinks. Getting late and deep enough into their cups that the others are dropping like flies. He's still up, would have to be drinking much, much faster to get the alcohol to build up enough in his system to mess him up before his quirk burns it off, Duster too because he drinks but never very much. Is pretty sure that's because of his own quirk. Really, really would not want to see someone with a quirk like his lose control of his higher faculties. Late enough and enough of the League passed out on the couches and floor. Not really enough room for that and their cohorts are in what's going to be a very uncomfortable tangle of hungover limbs in the morning. 

Not really expecting Shig to go over and very carefully extract Toga from that mess of limbs, but it makes sense, the two of them are the only ones living with Duster and Kurogiri here at the moment. She has a bed. He's expecting Shig to coax her somewhat awake to make her way upstairs, but he bends down and she blinks blearily at him and puts out her arms like a toddler. Dabi snorts and Duster rolls his eyes. But then Dabi is nearly choking on his fucking tongue because Shigaraki bends down low enough for her to loop her arms around his neck, hooks one under her legs and the other around her back, and lifts her off of the couch like she weighs nothing at all. Carries her towards the stairs and mutters to him, 

"Come on," on his way up. Dabi trails after him, mind fucking gone at that easy show of strength. Duster moves to the side of the hall when they get to the top of the stairs and he finally gets with the fucking program. Opens her door so Shig can bring her inside, follows him in and turns down her sheets. Shig pokes at her as he sets her down, "At least take off your shoes." 

Toga manages to kick them off and then flops back down onto her bed. Dabi throws the blanket back over her, "On your side, brat, don't need you drowning in your puke." 

She flicks him off and rolls over to face Duster, reaching out to catch his wrist. He pauses and she gestures for him to lean down. Visibly amused, Shigaraki leans down and lets Toga whisper something into his ear, hand covering her mouth so Dabi can't even try to read her lips. Duster looks more amused, eyes flicking up to look at him, and then murmurs back, "Is that so?" 

"Mmhmm," Toga agrees. 

"Interesting, you'll have to tell me more about that when you're sober." 

"Okay Tomu, night night." 

"Goodnight." 

"Thanks for tuckin' me in 'abi," 

"Yeah whatever, go to sleep, brat." 

They leave her room, shutting the door behind them, but Dabi's pretty sure she's out before they're in the hall. Waits half a second before his curiosity gets the better of him. 

"What'd she say?" 

Not expecting Duster to consider him for a long moment, eyes raking over him assessingly. "She's drunk. I'll talk about it with her in the morning, see if she actually knew what she was saying and meant it." Doesn't answer his question, "And then, if it's still relevant, we can talk about it."  

Raises a brow, "Okay, you cryptic motherfucker, night." Grateful to be able to go to his room and away from the other man. Didn't realize how fucking hot the alcohol and Shigaraki's easy show of strength had crept his temperature. 

///

Out in the field with Duster, Compress, and Toga. Supposed to be some spy shit, he's only there in case things get heavy. 

Things get fucking heavy.

Really not expecting to be up against Best Jeanist at the tail-end of the job and he's really overworking his quirk to keep his fibers far, far away from himself and the others as they run across rooftops to their extraction point. It's a nightmare, but they're handling it. It's going to be fine. Two more buildings and he can see Kurogiri's portal is already open and waiting for them. His bad luck that he misses one of the fibers as he jumps to the second to last building. It curls around his leg and he whips around and burns it off before it can restrain him or yank him in, but he loses his balance, drops onto the roof and rolls his ankle hard enough that he's pretty sure he popped some staples and it hurts enough to have him gritting his teeth. Fuck. Tries to keep pushing anyway, one more jump. Just one more. 

Knows that he wasn't able to push hard enough halfway through the arc and his stomach starts to drop. Think fast. Not going to be a splatter on pavement or arrested this early into the game. Oh this is going to fucking suck. Half twists and sends a massive burst of flame towards the wall of fibers that are coming after them. Big enough, hot enough, that he goes rocketing forward the last meter towards the other roof and the seams around his wrists are aching and smoking. Fuck. Lands hard, barely on the edge of the building and stumbles, starts to lose his balance. 

Shigaraki's hand locks around his wrist, grip bruising and pinky raised. Before Dabi can react he's pulled in, can't even blink before he's yelping, suddenly being lifted, his arms frantically grabbing hold of the other man so he doesn't lose his balance again as Shigaraki picks him up bridal style and darts the last few feet through the portal which closes immediately after them. And then he, Compress, Toga, and Duster are standing in the bar with Kurogiri. Well, they're standing. Dabi is being fucking held up by his boss and desperately trying not to turn bright fucking red. 

"You alright?" 

"Uh, yeah, might've fucked up my ankle a little but I've had worse. Thanks for the save." His voice is a little thinner than it should be. "You can put me down." 

And Duster does, but he carries him over to the couch first as Compress grabs the first-aid kit. Shig switches places with the other man when he comes back over and Toga catches Shigaraki's wrist again and pulls him down, covering her mouth again as she whispers to him. Her eyes aren't covered though and they are shining with her mirth. Duster's brows pull together slightly as he gives her that same bemused smile before responding, 

"You're sure?" 

"Yes!" 

"Interesting," never heard Shigaraki's voice purr like that. Between that sound, being able to lift him, and overusing his quirk, he's having a hard time lowering the temperature of his skin. Has to if Compress is gonna help him wrap his ankle. Shifts his focus to that instead. 

///

Actually fucked up his ankle more than a little. Ends up needing a crutch for a little while which is so fucking annoying, but at least none of them got fucking arrested. He'll put up with this bullshit on that merit alone. However, he does notice Shigaraki watching him a lot out of the corner of his eye. Absolutely going to set him on fire if he thinks he's a liability now even though he fucking took on the number four hero and managed to limp away with only a sprained ankle. Been working on planning the next job downstairs in the bar with Duster when it gets late enough that going to bed before sunrise sounds like a good idea. Reaches for his crutch without paying attention and knocks it over. 

"Fucking," this sucks, realizes it's fallen too far away and he's gonna have to use the couch to stand up before he grabs it. Sees Duster move closer. Well at least he's saving him some dignity by just helping him without him having to ask--

"Put your arms around my neck," 

"Wha--!" Dabi makes an extremely undignified squeaking sound, scrambling to grab onto Duster as he leans down and hooks his deadly hands under his thighs, just barely below his ass and lifts him. Hooks his legs around his hips too and Dabi's face must be bright fucking red beneath his scars as he clings onto Duster like a fucking koala, faces barely three inches apart. "What the fuck, Shigaraki, put me down!" 

"In a minute." And his voice is low, eyes half-lidded and smug. "Toga has been telling me that your blood smells hot every time you see me doing something like this." Fucking, little brat and her snitch nose. Going to burn it off her face. "You definitely feel hot but you always feel hot." Leans in a little closer, close enough their noses brush and Dabi makes another very undignified sound, temperature spiking another few degrees in spite of himself. Duster's smug smile widens. "Can I kiss you?" 

Really fucking dumb and embarrassing that as soon as the words are out of the other man's mouth his hands are shifting so that he can tangle them into Shigaraki's mop of thick pale hair and is smashing their lips together. Can't help it. His wiry, bratty boss is fucking holding up his weight, doesn't even seem bothered by it. That's so fucking hot he might be on the way to boiling his brain again. Definitely feels like it when the hands around the back of his legs tighten as Shigaraki kisses him back, just as hard and hungry. All teeth and tongues, heat and promise. There's definitely a bit of smoke on his breath when they part for air. Too soon, Dabi is absolutely about to lean back in when Duster murmurs against his lips, 

"I can put you down, Dabi. Or I can hold you against a wall and fuck you stupid."

Makes a very undignified sound at that, but Dabi is more than willing to give up any scrap of dignity he's ever clung to if he gets that in the next thirty seconds, so he just drags Shigaraki back in for another rough kiss. Already knows that the boss is strong, time to put his stamina to the test too. 

Thanks for submitting!

[zainberry]

I still have the biggest smile on my face from yesterday. It means so much to see Zayn being happy and silly and with people in his life who love and appreciate him. Honestly, it was almost too much. (Farmer!Zayn + Zeadpool + shirtless “birthday boogie” + the Matrix 2018? All in one day? He even found his twitter password, lol.) There’s been so much during this whole Christmas-New Years-birthday window that has just made my heart glow.

(Cont.) It all just makes me really happy for him, and it makes me happy to be his fan. And now these pictures today - I mean, COME ON! He looks incredible. He’s just too much. I’m so excited for z2 and for the rest of 2018. Anyway, thanks for letting me ramble. 🙈🙈🙈 I hope you have a great week!

Dude ME TOO! The zrought starved us all last year and now we’re being fed! I always say that Ztans are so persevering because Zayn goes ghost for months and we just deal with it (poorly most of the time, but still) and then we all come together to scream ecstatically when he does leave his house. But let’s talk about the abundance of Zayn content we got, like all the pictures? Of him looking happy and healthy? They warmed my heart and gave me a gentle kiss on the nose. And then we got fucking ZEADPOOL, and imagining how much Zayn must’ve nerded out added 10 years to my life. But I also want to take a moment to talk about all the looks he’s served in the last 48 hours? First of all the Matrix outfit with that floofy hair? the glasses? those chunky Prada shoes? THAT MFING FLOOR LENGTH DUSTER? Truly iconic, he just reached an entirely new level of coolness. And then today in that shearling? DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE ZAYN IN SHEARLING *takes deep breath* I promised myself I wouldn’t scream, but props to God and also Yaser & Tricia Malik for giving the world Zain Javadd and my life, the world thanks you on a daily basis. Also knowing that z2 is dropping in the first quarter and therefore coming any day now gives me endless joy, I hope he continues to murder me with looks and new music and actual promo

[crushingonrazz]

Positivity

I’ve noticed a lot, over the course of my own writing and interacting with other creators on Ao3 and Tumblr, that people seem to have a hard time looking at their own writing and actually loving it. I think that’s sad as hell. There are amazing writers not only in this fandom but all over the place that think they can’t write at all, and have a hard time finding positive points in their writing.

So I got in contact with a bunch of writers I know and read, and asked them all to go through their own works and find their favorite lines, their favorite pieces of writing, and to put them on a document so that I could post them here! 

This document ended up being 19 pages long on Google Docs.

So instead of posting all of them here, I’m going to just link the Document (definitely NSFW warning, but they are clearly marked, so just be careful), and I’ve put my favorite entry from every writer that participated under the cut. Thank you so much to @queenofbiscuits​ @weirder-than-you-know-blog-blog​ @gallifreyan-pal​ @undertailsoulsex​ @idontevenknowwhattoputhereugh​ @mercy-run @knowmeknot101 @sesurescue @accidentalfeelfest @purrfecktlysinful and @0netype (why can’t I tag half of you, who the heck knows) for participating in this! 

Please, hop on board this train of loving the things you’ve created! Reblog with your favorite lines of writing, your best art, no matter what fandom you are in or your “popularity”. You are all amazing creators, and I have to say, I’m very excited to see what you guys add to this one.

CrushingOnSans

Razz nodded stiffly, then paused, his fingers rubbing through the silky material of Blue’s scarf. Then, with a well-practiced motion, he reached behind his head with his free hand, untying the knot in his own neckerchief and pulling it from around his neck. He tossed it uncaringly onto the table he had been supporting himself on earlier, then, much more carefully, he straightened Blue’s scarf, tying it in place of his old one efficiently, smoothing the ends as he closed his eyes again, breath hitching in a manner dangerously close to a sob.

SansyFresh

I’m 283 years old, I raised your ungrateful ass when I was 102. I can’t fucking do this again.

Ollie_Oxen_Free

Cream: He left a while ago while you and my brother were chanting “shots” in our kitchen. Did you not notice? Stretch: what?? why didnt he tell me??? Red: he did Red: several times Red: “hey papy imma go get some ass tonight hell yeah” Red: and you totally agreed Red: “oh sure thing baby bro make sure you use protection” Red: and then he skedaddled the fuck outie to get some mad pussy

GallifreyanChild

The antivoid was white.

A color that many believe resembles purity, cleanliness. Of course, they’re not talking about actual white, because a pure, unadulterated white would be impossible to look upon with the naked eye. They’re talking about a color, something with a slight hint of grey, of yellow, of pink, of something colored that makes it bearable to see. Because white isn’t something nice. White is cold. White is harsh. White is loneliness. White is absence.

And when the antivoid was described as white, rest assured, that word was used with that exact definition in mind.

Undertailsoulsex

“WHAT OTHER NAMES COULD I EVEN GO BY?”

Papyrus smirked. “I COULD THINK OF A FEW.”

“LIKE WHAT?!” He grinned brightly and leaned across the table. It looked as if he was waiting on pins and needles for his new nickname.

“WELL, HOW ABOUT ‘CREAM PUFF?’”

There were a few moments of still silence before his other self burst out angrily, “YOU ARE NOT CALLING ME ‘CREAM PUFF!’ I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, AM TOO STRONG, TOO MANLY, TOO –”

Papyrus cut him off with a burst of laughter. The other him appeared affronted, but Papyrus couldn’t stop himself – it was truly hilarious how his clone was acting. His chest ached with glee as he lost himself to the hilarity of it all. It wasn’t long before the other him was joining in and the kitchen was filled with a loud chorus of “nyeh heh hehs.”

As their laughter died away, Papyrus realized just how much the exertion had hurt his cheekbones. It has been far too long since he had laughed so hard. And despite the pain in his face, the exertion had felt… good.

idontevenknowugh

“Listen to your sub first and foremost.” Black offered as advice. “Unless they suggest something truly idiotic,” he added wryly, making Slim chuckle.

Mercy_Run

“buddy, you came to the wrong universe with stats like those.”  The voice was his own, but not identical.  There was a low, gravelly quality to it, “you’ll be dusted within the first hour.”

He frowned at the implication.  Though, Sans really couldn’t fault the other monster for jumping to that conclusion.  At face value; his stats would mark him an easy kill for someone with the right intent.

“i don’t need to kill anyone to be good at fighting.”  He answered and the other skeleton’s expression shifted into something incredulous.

KnowMeKnot

“hey grillbz, what’s the weather like when you show up? hot and sunny,” Sans had made a gesture to fan himself, accompanied with a wink.

“i see steam every time i look at you.”

"i like my monsters like i like my peppers, orange and sizzling.”

SesuRescue

It was around the time for their lesson and Papyrus was feeling antsy. He tried asking for advice from his best friend Undyne, but ‘OPEN THE DOOR NAKED AND SUPLEX HIM ONTO THE BED’ didn't quite seem like the best advice to him.

In_The_aroace_brigade

Sans grinned back. “Yeah, I just don’t see how you are going to beat last year’s gift of supplies to help me clean up and organize my room. Especially the feather duster, that one really tickled me pink.”

“SAAANNNNSSSS, I SWEAR I WILL THROW YOU IN THE SNOWBANK.”

Sans kept his grin even as he replied “Well, I guess I’d make quite a deposit.”

PurrfecktlySinful

As he lay in bed, shirtless and surrounded by his sweaty blankets, Fell was suddenly alerted by the sound of his brother shouting and someone striding purposefully up the stairs. Those were not his brother’s footsteps. Where they being attacked?

Fell sat up and attempted to ready a bone attack. The constructs wavered into existence, coughed, sputtered, and then decided they had better places to be, disappearing with a disappointing fizz.

Fuck.

0neType 

And that’s dangerous, because it feeds something black and wholly unfamiliar somewhere in the pit of his soul. Something inky and dense that sucks away every good feeling like a black hole would do light. And Sans has been dealing with new issues on the daily because of this… thing he’s allowed to take root between them but he’s never hated so deeply. He’s never hated himself with this relentless, clawing dread that screams up from inside him till he’s begging it to just shut the hell up—

[jd-rush]

Chuck help me--I committed fanfic: Tony Stark meets the Guardians of the Galaxy.

TITLE: Units From Heaven* AUTHOR:  J.D. Rush FANDOM:  MARVEL, MCU--Iron Man and Guardians of the Galaxy PAIRING:  Tony Stark/Peter Quill kinda RATING:  R for excessive f-bombs and sexual innuendo  (I mean, it IS Tony Stark after all) SPOILERS:  a couple of minor ones for “Guardians of the Galaxy 2”, nothing too damaging SUMMARY:  The Guardians arrive on Earth with a dire warning.  Perhaps someone should have warned them about Anthony Edward Stark.  Takes place approximately three years after “Captain America:  Civil War”, and the Avengers are still estranged.  (I guess that's the nicest word for it.) DISCLAIMER:  Characters belong to MARVEL and Disney and anyone else who could sue me.  I also stole borrowed a couple of lines from “The Avengers”.  I’ll return them when I’m done with them. AUTHOR'S NOTE:  Humour, it's what I do.  This turned out more cracky than I expected, and while I poke fun at Tony, it's done with deep love.  Also, I don't know how long it takes Groot’s species to age or how the aging process works in space; for the sake of argument, let's say he's now the equivalent of early 20's, ‘kay? SECOND AUTHOR'S NOTE:  Many thanks to my lovely friend, Michele, for giving me the encouragement to write this, even though it meant putting up with my current Iron Man obsession and my crippling writer's block.  The XF joke is just for you, sweetie.

Italics mean inner thoughts

“Boss, an unidentified flying object has landed in the south corner of the Compound.”

“Unidentified?  As in. . .”

“As in a space ship, Boss.  It just appeared and. . .”

Tony Stark didn’t wait to hear the rest of what FRIDAY had to say.  With a flick of his wrist, his armor formed around him; in the blink of an eye, he was suited up and flying out to meet his ultimate nightmare.  He had been preparing for this moment for years, and he was ready.  Whatever came out of that ship was going to regret even thinking about coming to Earth, let alone being stupid enough to actually do it.

Tony landed about ten feet from the brightly coloured alien craft, the mid-day sun reflecting off its vivid blue and orange hull.  He barely had a moment to be thankful that he had stuck to classic hot-rod red and gold for his suit when he noticed a side door begin to lower and a shadow crossed the opened hatch.  Bracing his hands in front of him, Tony powered up his repulsors.  

Okay, Stark, here we go.  Showtime.  Shoot first, ask questions later.  Bring it on, you space motherfuckers.  You are going DOWN!

The invader appeared.  It was a large grey bald male humanoid; shirtless, his bare torso was covered in intricate scarlet scars.  He wandered slowly out of the ship, his red-rimmed ice blue eyes looking around in wonder, a big smile on his pudgy face.

“What the fuck?” Tony muttered under his breath.

The first visitor was followed by another male humanoid who was wearing some kind of metal mask with red-disk eye lenses which rendered his face completely unreadable and reminded Tony a bit too much of that putz, Ant-Man.  He was decked out in a long brown leather duster, two high-tech guns strapped to his waist like a genuine space cowboy.

“No, what the actual fuck?” Tony asked again.

At that point, two shapely female aliens made their way down the ship's ramp--one was a stunning brunette with green skin, the other was pretty with pale skin, big dark eyes and two tiny stalks protruding from her head.  Tony gave them the once-over and nodded.

“Okay, hot chicks.  Good.  I can work with that, even the antenna.  But I still gotta ask. . . What.  The.  Fuck?”

He didn't get an answer.  Instead he got a fifth alien, and this one was definitely not humanoid.  In fact, it looked like a raccoon, walking on its hind legs, and wearing a uniform that contained more weaponry than Black Widow on a normal Thursday morning.  Tony tried to remember if he had gotten drunk last night so he could explain all this away as nothing more than a severe hangover.

“What in the name of fuckitude is going on here?” Tony groused.  “I seriously don’t get paid enough to deal with this shit, and I get paid a fuck-ton, thank you very much.”

The words were barely out of his mouth when a tall tree-like creature lumbered out of the ship and walked over to stand with the others.  With a disbelieving headshake, Tony threw up his hands in defeat.  “You know what?  I’m out of fucks.  Seriously, there are not enough fucks in my data bank for this.  I surrender.  Take me to your leader.  What the fuck ever.”

“I am Groot,” the tree-creature rumbled, its arms--or rather limbs--stretched out wide in greeting.

“Yeah, right, you come in peace,” Tony snorted with a sarcastic laugh.  “I’ve seen that movie, pal.  Not buying what you're selling.”

“I am Groot,” the creature repeated, the tone of the words slightly different from the first time.

Hearing that, Tony lowered his hands.  Retracting his helmet, he glanced over his left shoulder towards the cluster of trees at the edge of the field.  “Yeah, I suppose she’s sexy.  For a tree.  I don’t know.  Elms never did it for me.  Give me a Northern Red Oak anytime.  Nothing like a redhead, right?”

“I am Groot?” the creature asked, curiously.

“Nah, none around here," Tony answered.  "Sorry, bud.  Get it?  I called you ‘bud’, because you're a tree and you sprout buds.  Or maybe you don't, seeing as you're an alien tree.  Maybe you sprout, I don't know, starfish or cupcakes or something weird like that.  Although a cupcake sprouting tree would be pretty fucking fantastic, now that I think about it.”

“I am Groot!”  Now the creature sounded miffed.

“Hey, not my fault for once,” Tony fired back.  “I wanted to plant some, but Bruce wouldn't have it.  He’s a big Earth Day kind of guy.  ‘You can’t bring in non-native plants, Tony.’  ‘They mess with the ecosystem, Tony.’  ‘I told you to buy organic, water-based lube, Tony.’  Do you know how hard it is to find that in Key Lime Pie flavour?  I mean, don’t get me wrong.  He’s a total honeybun.  Well, when he’s not turning into a big green rage monster.”  He gestured over at the green female alien.  “I can hook you up with him.  You two would make a good looking couple.”

“Wait a minute!” Cos-play Ant-Man cut in, obviously flustered.  Pointing at the tree creature, he asked, “You understand him?”   “Well, yeah,” Tony replied, “he’s a great conversationalist.  Much more eloquent than our current (sarcastic air quotes) ‘president’, I can tell you that for free.”

“I am Groot.”

Tony let out a loud belly laugh.  “You got that right!  I‘ve done business with that douche canoe.  *I* sure as hell didn't vote for him.”

The cowboy stepped forward and demanded, “HOW can you understand him?  I've been traveling with him for YEARS and I still don't get it!”

With a shrug of his armor-covered shoulders, Tony remarked, “Compared to Dum-E, he’s practically Oscar Wilde.”

Retracting his own helmet, Definitely Not Ant-Man said, “I have no idea who that is.  And what is a Dum-E?”

Tony was momentarily knocked breathless by the handsome green-eyed, artfully-bearded face that the helmet revealed.  “Whoa!  Wow!  Was not expecting that!  FRIDAY, take a note--the chicks aren’t the only hot aliens on that ship.”

“If you call me a chick once more, I'll pull your spleen out through your nose and make you eat it," the green chick, ahhh, female humanoid snarled.

“No offense intended," Tony quickly apologized.  “Seriously, I meant it strictly as a compliment.  You’re total babes.  Plus, I sort of don’t know your names.”

The green alien chick, ahhh, babe, ahhh, lady tilted her head and narrowed her eyes menacingly, causing Tony to take a step back in case his spleen was still in danger. (He wasn’t entirely sure what a spleen was but he certainly didn't want to eat one, especially his own).  After a moment, she conceded, “Okay, I'll let it slide.  For now.”

“She's getting soft,” the furry raccoon-like being chuckled.

She turned her glare on the critter, for which Tony was thankful.  “I’ll show you soft,” she hissed.

“I’ve seen her soft and it’s not half bad,” Hunky Not-Ant Man smirked, and Tony fell just a little bit in love with him.

Green girl took a deep breath, released it slowly, and started again. “I’m Gamora.  And this,” motioning to the bug alien, “is Mantis.”

Mantis smiled, making her already pretty face glow.  “Hello, you have a beautiful world,” she said, her voice soft and soothing.  “I look forward to seeing more.”

“So do I,” Tony replied, suavely, throwing in a wink for good measure.

“Don’t tell me--you flirt with everyone, don‘t you?” Gamora asked.

“Pretty much, yeah,” Tony admitted with a smug grin

Shaking her head in dismay, Gamora muttered, “Great.  Another one.  What did I ever do to deserve this?”

“You were an intergalactic assassin who killed many people and destroyed untold lives,” the big bald alien stated matter-of-factly.

“Yes, right I did do that,” Gamora admitted between gritted teeth.  “Thank you for reminding me.”

“You are welcome,” the big bald alien said, totally without sarcasm or irony. “However, I do not understand how you could forget something like that.”

Gamora clenched her fists tightly and took another deep breath.  The calming techniques Mantis had taught her usually worked when she was ready to kill her crewmates, though not always as the hole she had recently punched in the galley’s door would testify.  Pointing to the big bald paisley-printed alien she continued, “That’s Drax and the ‘other hot alien’ as you so obnoxiously put it, is our captain, Peter Quill.”

“I am Groot,” the tree announced proudly.

"You've already met Groot," Gamora commented dryly, “and last but not least. . .”

“I'm Rocket,” the furry animal creature cut in.  Looking up at Gamora, he snarked, “Sorry, sweets, but I was growing old waiting for you to get to me.  We’re The Guardians of the Galaxy. It’s what we call ourselves.  Sort of like a team.  ‘The Universe’s Mightiest Heroes’ type thing.”

“That’s my line,” Tony grumbled under his breath.

“Actually, they call me Star-Lord,” Quill corrected as he stepped forward, hand extended, pointedly ignoring Gamora’s eye roll.

“And you can call me anytime,” Tony crooned in his best seductive voice, which was pretty damn good.  His right gauntlet folded back upon itself effortlessly and he grasped Quill’s warm hand, shaking it a bit longer than necessary.  Quill blushed slightly, which made Tony grin.  'I still got it', he thought cheerfully.

“We know who you are, Anthony Stark,” Gamora said, interrupting the magical moment.

“It's why we chose this spot to land,” Mantis added with a nod of her head which made her antennae bounce gently.  

Tony stop shaking Quill's hand (much to the man’s disappointment) and regarded the two females suspiciously.  “You know me?  How?  ‘Cause if it was those damn YouTube videos again, I swear I’m just gonna buy that fucking company and burn it to the ground.  I don't care what my lawyers say.”

“Ain’t you Iron Man, the guy that blew up the Chitauri army?” Rocket asked, waving at Tony's armor.  “I mean, ‘cause your outfit is kind of a dead give-away.  Great suit, by the way.  Nice and shiny.”

“Thanks, I polished it today.  You wouldn't believe the amount of Turtle Wax I go through in a week, and that's not including the extra-curricular activities.  And yeah, I nuked some alien space ships, but in my defense, they were sort of destroying Manhattan at the time, so they definitely deserved it.”

“Your name is known throughout the cosmos,” Mantis informed him, respect and awe in her voice.

“They sing songs of you and your legendary deeds!” Drax boomed, excitedly.

Tony pondered that for a moment before saying, “Well, I suppose that weekend party at Hef's in ‘05 would qualify me as a ’legend’ but that doesn’t explain how YOU know who I am.”

“I am Groot.”

At that, Tony eyed the group skeptically, then shook his head.  “Bullshit.  You're pulling my leg.”

“That is impossible,” Drax declared emphatically.  “We are standing too far away to even touch you let alone pull your leg.”  Off to the side, Quill did a dramatic face-palm.

Tony continued to study the individuals in front of him, searching for any sign that they were joking but it was obvious they were serious.  He laughed uneasily.  “No, ah. . .see, I think you’re mistaken.  I’m not even a hero on this planet, let alone across the universe.  You can ask anyone.  I mean, Rogers probably has a entire notebook filled with my faults.  And I’m pretty sure S.H.I.E.L.D. had to start a second file cabinet.”

“That’s where you’re wrong, Mr. Stark,” Quill said.  “You actions saved many worlds from invasion.  Billions of beings, trillions maybe, owe their lives to you.  You are indeed a hero, and it is an honour to finally meet you.”

For once in his life, Anthony Edward Stark was truly speechless.  He just stared at the six beings in front of him as he tried to process what they were saying.  He couldn't remember the last time he had been told he did something good, never mind getting any praise for it.  “I, ah. . .wow.  Okay. Thanks,” he finally stammered.  “That’s, um, good to know, I guess.  It still doesn’t quite explain why you’re here, though.  I mean, you could have just sent me a cookie bouquet or something.”

“We're here because of Thanos,” Gamora stated simply.  

“Say who?” Tony shot back.

“He’s Gamora's father,” Mantis answered.

“Adoptive father,” Gamora corrected. “Intergalactic terrorist, genocidal maniac, menace to all life forms. . .“

“Big time dickbag,“ Rocket added, disdainfully.  

“Yeah, that, too,” Gamora agreed.  “He wants to rule the universe and impose his will on every living creature in it.  And Terra is first on his list.”

Tony huffed.  “I‘m guessing we‘re ‘Terra‘?” At Gamora‘s nod, he whinged, “Jesus Christ on a fucking crutch.  What did we do to piss him off?”

“Besides blow up his army?” Rocket retorted.

“You ever hear of the Infinity Gauntlet?”  Quill asked.

“Opening band for Black Sabbath?” Tony guessed.

Gamora just grimaced.  “Why am I destined to be surrounded by the biggest idiots in the galaxy?”

Quill quickly began talking fast before Gamora's sword made an appearance.  “Best as I can explain it, there’s this glove, and it holds these six stones. . .”

“Infinity Stones,” Rocket supplied.

“Right, Infinity Stones,” Quill continued. “They’re really old and super powerful and whoever has the glove and those stones can rule the universe.  Thanos already has four, so once he gets the final two. . .”

“The Mind Stone and the Time Stone,” Tony interrupted.

Mantis's already big eyes grew bigger in surprise.  “How do you know about those?” she asked breathlessly.

“Oh, that's easy,” Tony said.  "I've got them."

"WHAT?!??!" the Guardians all exclaimed, well, all except Groot, who exclaimed, “I AM GROOT!”

“Not ME personally," Tony clarified.  “My friend, Stephen Strange, has one of them.  Well, I SAY friend.  Sorry.  Bad ‘Sherlock’ joke.  Had to do it.  Anyway, it’s encased in this pendant called the Eye of Amaretto or something like that.  Tacky ass thing, but major league hoodoo I can tell you that.  We got drunk once and he used it to turn me back into a virgin so he and Rhodey could. . .”

“And the other stone?” Gamora prompted, not wanting to know where that story was going.

“Yeah, the Mind Stone.”  Tony chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.  “Well, it's currently embedded in the head of my accidental mystical android son.”

Gamora rubbed her eyes tiredly and groaned, “I really don't even want to know.”  Tony got the feeling that was her default reaction to most things.  “The point is, we have to get to them before he does or else. . .”

Quill mouthed ‘Ka-Boom’ while miming an explosion with his hands.

Tony mulled their words over before confirming, “So you're telling me that we’re going to be invaded by space aliens again.  Extra-terrestrial armies, space ships, powerful super-beings, advanced weapons, all that shit, right?”

“Exactly,” Quill replied.  “That’s why we journeyed across the galaxy.  To warn you and maybe help Terra prepare for. . .”

But he didn‘t get to finish what he was saying as Tony let out a sudden, excited shout, “That is fucking AWESOME!”

Everyone just stared at Tony in confused silence until Drax asked, cautiously, “It is?”

“Fucking A+ it is!”   Glancing upwards, Tony screamed to the sky, “You hear that, Rogers!  I was right, you sanctimonious twatwaffle!  You and Barton can both eat me!”

Rocket snorted.  "Twatwaffle.  I like that.  I'm stealing it."

"What else is new?" Gamora scoffed.

“Um. . .” Quill started, but Tony just talked right over him.  “For years I tried to tell them.  I kept saying, ‘The aliens are coming back‘.  ‘They’re gonna kick our asses‘.  ‘They’ll make New York look like a day at Disneyland’, but would they listen to me?  Oh no.  They were all like ‘You’re crazy, Tony.’  ‘You’re drunk, Tony‘.  ‘You’re being paranoid, Tony.’  ‘You’re talking out of your ass, Tony.’  Well, suck my hairy balls, you assclowns, because I fucking NAILED IT!”  He ended his victory speech with a couple of fist pumps and a happy ‘robot dance’, including some moon walking which looked rather graceful even in the armor, proving it probably wasn't the first time he had done it.

Quill gave a long, low whistle of approval.  “Sick moves, bro!”

“Like 'em?” Tony said with a saucy smirk.  “Had a private session with Beyonce once.  And then we did some actual dancing.”

Mantis leaned towards Gamora and asked uneasily, “Are we sure this is the man who will save the universe?”

Gamora stepped forward, determined to reason with this obviously eccentric (though desperately needed) man and get their mission back on track.  “Mr. Stark, if you would just. . .”

Tony held up his hand to silence her.  “No, no, sweetheart.  Wait a minute.  Let me enjoy this for a few seconds.  I’ve earned it.  And please, it’s Tony.”

“I like this guy,” Rocket announced, hands--or rather, paws--on his tiny hips.

“As I was saying, TONY,” Gamora continued, undaunted, “super villain on the way, imminent interplanetary war, millions of planets at stake, not much time.  Need a plan.  Is there some place we can talk?”

“Yeah, sure, you can all stay up at the Compound,” Tony replied, breezily.  “We’ve got plenty of room.  Most of the team is out on a mission right now.  I only stayed behind because I promised Parker I’d help him with his senior class science project.  Not that he really needs it—the kid’s a goddamn genius but he seems to like my input for some reason.  I think he does it for the hugs and the Double Stuf Oreos.  And Strange is mixing it up in the multi-verse somewhere.  He’s gonna be so stoked to meet you, Star-Lord.  All the awesome facial hair bros!”

Quill's smile was almost blinding.  “You called me Star-Lord!”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Tony commented.  “It’s much cooler than ‘Peter’, and cool’s the rule right?  Hey, I just thought of something--I've got TWO Peters now!  I really should make some kind of pervy sex pun about that.”

“Please don’t,” Gamora muttered.  “It’s really not necessary.”

“You don’t know me very well,” Tony grinned.  “Man, I can't wait until Rhodey gets a load of you guys.  He's gonna lose his shit!”

“Isn’t that what you want to do with sh--” Drax began but Gamora quickly cut him off before he could finish.  “And our ship?”

“Don’t worry about your ship--it’ll be totally safe.  Eject!”  With that, the Iron Man suit opened and Tony stepped out, dressed in the tight black jeans and even tighter black tank top he was wearing when FRIDAY had sounded the alarm.

“GUH!” Quill gasped as Tony Stark was fully revealed for the first time, noting that he DEFINITELY put that smoking hot Rajak girl to shame.

Tony preened a bit.  ’Oh yeah, definitely still got it’, he thought, but instead he patted the suit‘s shoulder and said, “52 here will watch over it for you.  He'll like that.  Will make him feel useful.  Sentry mode.”  At the command, the suit closed back up and raised its arms to chest level, repulsors at the ready.

“Fucking cool,” Rocket stated, clearly impressed.

Tony preened some more.  He liked it when people geeked out with him over his tech--even when those people were walking, talking raccoon-like things.  “I know, right?  You should see the awesome shit I’ve got in development.  I’ll give you a tour of my lab later.  You’ll love it.  Your whiskers may never stop twitching.”  

“That might not be a great idea,” Quill warned, recognizing the scheming twinkle in Rocket’s eye.  

“Nah, it’s a great idea.  I always have great ideas.”  Slinging an arm around Quill’s shoulders, Tony started leading him towards the Compound.   “For instance, there was this one time that me and Reed Richards--great guy, maybe you‘ll get to meet him if Disney ever gets the rights back from FOX--anyway, we had this idea to. . . oh wow, is that an actual Zune?  Cool.  Haven't seen one of those in years.  Retro-tech.  You'll get along great with Parker.  That’s my other Peter by the way.  Still haven’t thought of a good sex pun yet.  Seriously, you should see what that kid can do with a Nintendo Game boy, a roll of copper wire, and a box of Legos. ��Here,” digging into the back pocket of his jeans, Tony slapped a cellphone into Quill’s hand. “Starkphone 8.0  Latest model.  Not even on the market yet."

“Why would I need a phone in outer space?” Quill asked, puzzled.

“It holds 50,000 songs, not including the entire AC/DC song library, which comes pre-loaded,” Tony explained.  “Cost me a fortune for the copyrights, but totally worth it.  Can you believe there are people out there that don't know the words to 'Highway to Hell'?  I mean, what's wrong with this world?  Maybe I should let Thermos have it after all.”

“Thanos,” Rocket corrected.

Tony waved his hand dismissively.  “Him, too.”

Gamora shook her head and admonished, “Is everything a joke to you?”

“Funny things are,” Tony shot back automatically.  “Whoa, déjà vu!”

“Did you say FIFTY thou--?”  Quill couldn’t even find the words he was so overwhelmed.  Throwing his arms around Tony, he gave the man a huge bear hug.  “I love you, bro.”

“Yeah, I hear that a lot,” Tony laughed, patting Quill on the back.  “Would this be a good time to tell you I fully intend to go old school Captain Kirk on you later?  Explore the final frontier, if you get my drift.”

“Just so you know, I don‘t put out just for a phone, even one as awesome as this,” Quill bantered back, caressing said phone as if it were the greatest treasure in the universe.  “You also have to buy me dinner.”

Tony squeezed Quill‘s shoulder and grinned widely.  “Oh absolutely, Star-Lord.  I know how to properly woo a guy.  Way to a man’s heart, all that jazz.  Hey, do you like shawarma?  I know this great place.  They deliver.  Well, they’ll deliver for me.  They’re back in the city so it’ll take a couple of hours but I guarantee it’s the best food you folks have ever eaten.”  Calling over his shoulder to the other Guardians, he asked, “Anyone else in?”

“I should like to try it,” Mantis said with an excited smile, hurrying to catch up with Tony and Quill.  “I like experiencing new things.”

“There are so many ways I could respond to that, but most of them will get me slapped,” Tony quipped.

“Or worse,” Quill said.  Leaning close to Tony’s ear, he whispered, “Drax kinda has a crush on her, and his nickname is ‘The Destroyer’.”

“Say no more,” Tony whispered back, happy for the warning, though truthfully he only had eyes for Captain Hottie anyway.  To Mantis he said, “Just follow me, my dear lady.  I’ve got a whole world of new things to show you.”  To the others, he gestured grandly towards the Compound,  “C’mon Treebeard.  You too, Crash Bandicoot.  Right this way.”

“I am Groot?”

Tony stopped, turned around, and dramatically clutched at his chest in horror.  “Are you kidding me?  You don't know who Treebeard is?  Fuck me sideways.”

“Do-able” Quill mumbled.

“That’s it, we're definitely watching 'Lord of the Rings' tonight.  The Director's Cut.  You’ll love it.  Oh, and don’t even think about stealing the suit, Meeko,” Tony warned, seeing Rocket making a move towards the Iron Man armor.  “First off, it’s coded just to me, myself, and I, and it’ll turn you into a smoking grease spot faster than you can say ’boy, that was a dumb fucking thing to do.’ And second, it wouldn’t fit you anyway. No sweat.  I can build you one.  I’ve got some odds and ends hanging around the workshop.  Should only take me a day or two.”  He motioned to the last two Guardians.  “You joining us, Green Bean?  Conundrum?  Shawarma for everyone!”

Drax followed along after the others, musing aloud, “How is it possible that he can talk out of his ass?  They did not mention that in any of the tales.  Indeed, he is a hero worthy of song!”

“Fuck my life,” Gamora muttered as she trudged after her team, knowing the hole in the galley door was going to have a new friend very soon.  

THE END *Title is a play on the phrase, "Pennies from Heaven", ie. unexpected good fortune, and as GotG use 'units' instead of money, well, there you go.