#GOD I NEED TO MAKE MORE IS IT A BIRD ART TO COMPENSATE FOR WHAT YOURE COOKING HERE… | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

benicebefunny · 3 years ago

Text

I posted 722 times in 2022

That's 328 more posts than 2021!

61 posts created (8%)

661 posts reblogged (92%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@cosmictuesdays

@comrade-omnidroid

@obstinatecondolement

@cynassa

@nightlyponder

I tagged 649 of my posts in 2022

Only 10% of my posts had no tags

#art - 130 posts

#cats - 95 posts

#snails - 80 posts

#ted lasso - 62 posts

#video - 55 posts

#our flag means death - 49 posts

#animals - 45 posts

#what we do in the shadows - 41 posts

#birds - 38 posts

#fanart - 35 posts

Longest Tag: 128 characters

#in s1 ted compensates for nathan's poverty and subjugation by being incredibly attentive (perhaps to the point of condescension)

My Top Posts in 2022:

It's pretty wild how neoliberalism, particularly social media discourse and thinkpiece journalism, has turned a valuable concept like toxic masculinity into yet another racist gender binary.

Take, for example, Ted Lasso.

As a cultural norm, toxic masculinity does not always require top-down enforcement through physical violence. It's not just the guys at the top of the hierarchy who are beating toxic masculinity into people. People throughout the social hierarchy keep toxic masculinity going through subtler means, like language and organizational structure.

The Ted Lasso fandom (and many journalists covering the show) have simplified this to "toxic masculinity is when lower-status men say mean things."

And because toxic masculinity has become a binary, this means that the only "bad" masculinity resides in mean-saying, lower-status men.

Everyone else is exhibiting "good" masculinity. Even when they're enacting physical violence and call other men bitches.

At the end of the day, what this does is stigmatize characters who are less traditionally masculine--as defined by white norms. And, crucially, it grants a free pass to characters who fulfill the ideals of traditional white masculinity.

And that's how we get this bizarro world where men of color, particularly Nathan and Sam, are hyper-scrutinized for using their words and expressing their emotional needs. And where white characters like Beard and Roy are beloved for bottling up their feelings and threatening/using physical violence.

Roy headbutted Jamie so he could hug him after. If that's not toxic masculinity, I don't know what is. But the fandom doesn't have time to unpack that. It's too busy arguing that Nathan calling Colin a motel painting is somehow worse than Colin physically attacking Nathan everyday for god knows how long.

I'm not trying to reverse the binary here, making Nathan good and Roy toxic. The problem is that we are thinking about masculinity as a good/toxic binary. People--including fictional characters--relate to masculinity in ways that are far more complex than merely good or toxic. We lose so much when we reduce masculinity to just another binary.

Also, the good/toxic binary--like binaries in general--is a tool of white supremacy. So maybe let's knock that shit off.

32 notes - Posted September 28, 2022

Worf is a wonderful character because, on the one hand, yes, he chose to live in what amounts to the RV parked in DS9's driveway (like the surfer dude from Step by Step), and found great comfort in its austere solitude.

But he also 100% would not buy a property if the finishings weren't original to the house.

35 notes - Posted February 4, 2022

You: I hope Our Flag Means Death gets renewed.

Me, a People of Earth fan: You might want to set your sights a little higher than that.

48 notes - Posted March 23, 2022

Do I think Nathan Shelley is unredeemable? No, not all.

Do I want to watch Nathan Shelley prostrate himself at the feet of a club (a business) that has exploited and abused him for years? Not particularly.

Do I want to pay Apple to see Nathan Shelley earn his way back into the good graces of rich, white people who treat him--at best--like a fucking child? Nope, I'd rather bathe in gravel.

Fuck redemption. Fuck some top-down notion of morality. Gimme reconciliation and mutual accountability.

50 notes - Posted February 3, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

People need to stop writing Flower Shop and Tattoo Parlor AUs. Between the Cupcake Bakery AUs and the Coffee Shop AUs, the rents in the alternative universe are already too high.

Essential services like Grocery Store AUs and Laundromat AUs have been crowded out. None of the Longstanding, Family-Owned, Local Small Business AUs can afford to operate a storefront.

449 notes - Posted August 6, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

2 notes · View notes

littlespaceporgs · 5 years ago

Text

The Clone Wars Reacts - Part 5

Or Leah loses her shit at Jar Jar, thirsts for Aayla Secura for an episode and a half, and then swoons for Riyo Chuchi.

Welcome once more to the Reacts series! I’m a busy woman for now but I am setting up a schedule for this series which will be

Today we’re covering episodes 12, 13, 14 and BONUS! 15. This is because I got super bored during episode 14 and basically didnt write anything so, here you go! As per usual, major spoiler alert for season 1 of the clone wars! If you haven’t read the previous parts to this series, I suggest you do so that you can follow along!

Part 1 - Episodes 1 and 2 Part 2 - Episodes 3, 4 and 5 Part 3 - Episodes 6, 7 and 8 Part 4 - Episodes 9, 10 and 11

Tags (if you want to join, my taglist can be found on my page!): @likeshootingstarsinthenightsky @girlvader @simping-for-fives @littlevodika @hounding-around @pro-fangirls-unsocial-life @onabouteverything @acciokenobi @catsnkooks @captainrexstan @roseofalderaan @fractiouskat

We’re well past the half-way point, so there is 2 parts left of season 1, and then onto season 2! So lets get into it!

Episode 12: The Gungan General

> heheheheheheheh jar jar I am KEEN

> I get hondo and jar jar in one episode

>> this’ll be funny

>>> actually no scratch that, this is gonna be hilarious

> oh and they woke up in a cell this will be fun

> HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA AND THEYRE BOUND TO DOOKU

> DISASTER I TELL YOU

> “if I keep my mouth shut you’ll devise a plan so get off the god forsaken planet?” “YES”

> this dude seems traitorous as fuck (im referring to one of the pirates, not dooku shockingly)

> I wish Ahsoka and Yoda were in this too, I want more disaster lineage

> ah he is indeed a traitor

> “HEIDY HO CHANCELLOR”

> JAR JAR WHOO

> “stop messing around, we’re landing. Secure yourself” “MESA TRYING ITS STUCK”

> promptly followed by jar jar falling everywhere

> oh and now he’s in the cockpit

> oh shit that senator guy is definitely dead right?

> “do control tour protégées insolence” “anakin, control your insolence, the count is concentrating”

> “do we know where we’re going?” “Ssh anakin” “DO we know where we’re going?”

> is it safe? Of course it i- riiiiiight

>> I forgot this was the clone wars for a second, this is gold

> FRIENDS DONT DRUG FRIENDS HONDO

> y’know, dooku’s quite amusing when he’s not trying to kill my favourite characters

> “are you now in command” “uh no, binks is the highest ranking” ooooohhhh boy

> ooooooohhhh and some mind tricks too, nice

> I hate to say this, but jar jar is actually smart

> holy shit

> beasties are nearby too, we’ll be fine. they run, we run

>> Dayum jar jar actually making good decisions?

> I present a real and accurate image of my reaction to this statement

> Mesa be having an idea oooohhh booooyyy

> obi wan that is no way to speak to your grandmaster

> be patient master the count is elderly and doesn’t move like he used to

> I would kill you both now if I didn’t have to drag your bodies

>> HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH this is the only reaction I’ll accept

> then falling all over each other is the only thing I’ve ever needed to see

> “ this is not going well” no shit

> my question is why did obi wan not drop Dooku?? Does he actually still care about this man?

> you’re right, I don’t think youre going to be friends 🤦‍♀️😂

> sneaky lying snake

> bruh they don’t even know you’ve got the Jedi captive??????????

>> so how does that work you dumbass

> no shit, you will look like fools obi wan

> “there be some bombad clankers” 😂😂

>> “huh YOURE right, bombad clankers” I love the shock

> YOURE RIGHT HE IS SMARTER THAN HE LOOKS, GIVE JARJAR SOME CREDIT

> oh boy anakin, just keep your mouth shut genius

> man electrocution doesn’t look like fun

> HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAH

> The next few lines of confused joy are me reacting to jar jar somehow single handedly taking out 3 tanks

> what the fuck

> JarJar I I’m what-

> JUST DID A GOOD THING, I DONT REGERT THIS THING AT ALLLLLLLL

> fuckin JarJar was great

> “KILL HIM HES NOT A REPRESENTATIVE, HES A PLAGUE” I’m ded 💀😢💀

> serves you right you snake, now dooku gonna choke your ass

> oooohhhhh that’s how these two twits (hondo and obi-wan) became friends

> “and... he knows where you live” Oof the subtle threat is real

> hem I love obi wan very much and his sarcasm

Episode 13: Jedi crash

> I JUST SAW AAYLA I AM EXCITED I AM ALSO ATTRACTED TO HER VERY MUCH

> SHES HOT

> I LOVE HER

> AND HER VOICE JUST MAKES ME ☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️

> I wish I was bly, not gonna lie

> I have a quick question - the 501st colour is blue right? Then why do they have a gold squad, doesn’t the extra colours just confuse things?

> I love seeing anakin and Ahsoka in action coolest thing to watch

> And anakin

>> I am also quite attracted to him

>>> imagine dragging your hands through that hair as he- wait no I have minors in my followers not gonna finish that

> Uh oh

>> Oh anakin you twit

>>> HE LOCKED HOMSELF IN WITH AN EXPLOSION JDGKJDJFKFKFKFKFF

> HES INSANE

> Are all Jedi so reckless? Just the good ones - love this by the way

> Oooohh shit for a STAR

> I mean like? I know anakin doesn’t die, but this shit is concerning

> Perfected the art of destroying ships and getting master almost killed? Sounds familiar

> I hate it when they just call them “padawan “ it just feels very impersonal like bleh

> Like I love aayla but god the Jedi preach some bullshit

>> God forbid someone raises a child and gets attached to it

>>> Like for fucks sake

>>>> Can you tell this is something I’m passionate about?

> Anyway, moving on

> Oh hi anakin! You’re alive!

> That bird lookin thing is tryna eat my boy 😤

> Oop - well that dudes dead

> Aawwwwwww aayla looks so sad, this makes me sad too

> Can we just appreciate this?

> Well these little critters are cute

> Ooooohhh I think I agree with this little dude

> You can skip the paragraph if you like, its just me going off about ‘peacekeeping’

> Alright gonna get mildly into it for a second, the clone wars really gets into it with episodes like this, displaying how the entire galaxy was starting to lose faith in the Jedi and their peacekeeping ways, in the movies we just got that people just started hating the Jedi because they became part of the war, but this really fleshes it out and shows just how slowly and gradually the loss of faith is. Because he’s right, the Jedi aren’t peacekeepers anymore, they bring as much destruction with them that the separatists do and have become symbols of war. They’re fighting for a good reason yes, but they can no longer claim that they are peacekeepers or that they played no role in this war.

> ANYWAY BACK TO REACTS

> AH MY TWO FAVOURITE WOMEN AND A PRETTY BACKGROUND AGAIN!! They really do be doing me a great service

Part 14: Defenders of Peace

> I’m really not into this episode, just saying it now

> Anakins just as bad as obi wan, like honestly just chill bro, fucking REST

>> MY BOYS DESERVE SOME GODDAMN REST AND I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL OK-

> Okay but is it taking a life if it’s a droid?

> Ugh this dudes ugly as fuck

> What did you think was gonna happen?? Of course your village was going to be ransacked

> I could go on forever about the pointlessness of this war like it just makes me mad palpatine you slimy git-

> My reacts this episode are really boring huh, I’m not into it 😭

*fully I didn’t write anything for about 10 minutes here because it’s just a little boring*

> HOLY SHIT NOW THATS A FUCKING WEAPON

> Yep sorry that’s it for this ep, I’m so bored 😂

>> Anyway, bonus episode because that one was short!

Part 15: Trespass

> YES OBIWAN WOHOOOOOOOOOOOOO

> AND IS THAT RIYO CHUCHI I SPY?????

> Hahahahahahahhahahaha it’s not tatooine, you got that right

> Oh god this dude already sounds like a dick (its the chancellor dude but not palpatine)

> Why’s he so defensive over it?

> Oh yikes, that does not look good

> Seppies don’t do that though - this is... odd

> Ah and the same thing has been done to the droids

> Off topic, but I think I’m going to make a clone wars drinking game that I can do while I do my reacts, so I’m going to make that this week, send me your ideas in the comments or dm me!

> Back to ep - pfffffffttt obi wans little taps and then anakin really goes WHACK

> Anyway I’m going to do this in the next couple days and then every Friday night I’ll watch a few eps and drink away

> Alright back to the episode once more

> Abominable snowman????

>> Definitely

> This is gonna go well isn’t it?

> “Well? Say something”

>> “Just shut up” *visible eye roll*

> What the fuck is their mouth

> Okay really obi wan, I think it’s pretty clear they don’t speak basic

> YEEEEEEAAAHHH THATS MY BOI ANAKIN

> Awwwwwwww that shits cute, fucking bear huugggg I want to be hugged like that

> I’m not fussed if it’s anakin, obi wan or kit fisto but please someone love me

>> Preferably kit fisto

> Anyway this dudes a dick (again, its the chancellor dude)

> They obviously have intelligence, and this dude has issues

>> I’m thinking he’s trying to compensate for something 👀

> Oof you really gonna tell a Jedi what to do?

> HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA the other people’s were there already

> Ugh he reminds me of my very racist grandparents oh boy

> You’ve been told like 4 times that it is not your jurisdiction anymore and you still can’t take it?

>> BRUH

> She’s so tiny and adorable and her voice is just 🥰🥰🥰🥰

>> Oh no

>>> I’m simping for another character

> Surely this guy dies

> HAHAHAHAHAH HE JUST GOT SPEARED SERVES YOU RIGHT MOTHERFUCKER

> What a dick, he shall not be missed

> She’s just, so pretty??? And smart????

>> FUCK MY BISEXUAL ASS CANT HANDLE THIS

> he’s seriously not dead yet?

> AAAHH RIYO YOU SMART GIRL YEEEEESSSS NEGOTIATE THAT PEEEEAAACCEEEE

> THATS MY GIRL SENATOR CHUCHI YEEEESSS

Welp that’s it for today folks, it was lovely, see y’all at some point this week where I say the drinking game rules and then next drunken Friday (even though these are gonna be released on saturdays but I write them on fridays?)

#the clone wars #tcw #the clone wars reacts #reacts series #star wars ahsoka #anakin skywalker #ahsoka tano #obi wan kenobi #kit fisto #riyo chuchi #jar jar binks #basically a leah simp fest #fucking sigh #it took one (1) ep for me to simp

25 notes · View notes

mountphoenixrp · 5 years ago

Photo

We have a new citizen in Mount Phoenix:

Melody Park, who is known by no other name, a 34 year old daughter of Horus. She is a professor and freelance private investigator.

DEFINING FEATURES: Melody looks slim and unassuming but, underneath her poised and perfect exterior she is incredibly strong with defined muscles. She has miscellaneous scars littered along her body from her work in the FBI. The most prominent being a clean but long scar along the length of her abdomen from her sternum to just before her hips from a surgery she received when she was 25. Her only tattoo is on her left collarbone, written in perfect calligraphy is one word; Fighter. When using her powers her left eye becomes a dark grey and her right eye a deep amber gold color.

PERSONALITY: Melody spent the entirety of her twenties as an FBI Agent and university student. With an IQ of 186, the ability to read up to 25,000 words per minute, and savant tendencies, she was a perfect recruit. This left her cold, distant, calculated, and bureaucratic on the outside. However, the one thing the grueling work as a government agent never took from her was her caring and loving nature. Her moral compass is strong and she fights for what she believes in, even if that means she puts herself in danger. Melody is very passionate and kind to those closest to her, once she gets close with others she opens up very quickly and shows her goofy and silly side. That is once she knows she can trust you. She has always exuded leadership qualities and people tended to look up to her a lot growing up so, she’s grown comfortable with being a sister/maternal figure for others. Her younger brother’s especially follow her every word and cling to every single one of her actions. This has lead her to quickly offer familial support and a place in her family to those who lack the love of a sister, aunt, or mother.

HISTORY: Park Minyoung, also known as Melody Park, was born in Buffalo, New York to Park Hejin or Virginia Park. A young girl in law school, doing her best with what life handed her. In this case it was a child - the child of a god no less. Virginia went on to finish law school with the help of her parents watching Melody whenever they could and her friends babysitting her while her mother was in class. Her mother passed the bar one month after Melody’s fifth birthday. Virginia was a good lawyer and an amazing mother, never failing at the perfect work/life balance. She worked hard as a single mother to give Melody the best life they could have. Virginia was apprehensive at first about allowing Horus time with Melody, always protective of her darling daughter. She was heartbroken in her own way but, she still knew it would good for them both for Horus to be in her life somehow.

Melody was I incredibly smart and well liked as a child, being labeled a prodigy at age six due to her advanced intelligence. Despite being pushed into an advanced level and being years younger than her peers constantly, they still gravitated towards her and followed her. She always ended up having an army of older kids that were very protective of her. After Horus taught her how to use her powers, it was a struggle not to use them all the time. What kid doesn’t dream of soaring through the sky, flying with birds and feeling the wind in their hair? Add on top of that he constant need of approval from the older kids she was always surrounded with, it was hard for her not to show off to gain some points with those who didn’t automatically like her. She mastered the art of flying pretty quickly, nothing felt better to her than the rush of wind through her hair and cold air on her skin.

Life was pretty easy for Melody growing up outside of school and the expectations of her teachers. Her mother didn’t date so, it was just the two of them in their cozy home in Buffalo. Melody ran track, was captain of the swim team, and even tried her hand at soccer. If she hand’t been so young in high school, she’d have been the one all the other kids wanted to be. She wasn’t popular by any means, especially in high school. Teachers used to use her as “motivation” for the other kids, constantly comparing 16 and 17 year olds to a 12 year old can have it’s negative effects on her social circle. She compensated for their quiet disdain of her by being the kindest, sweetest, and nicest person at school. She gained even more favor from teachers and less from peers as she made a point to volunteer whenever she could. The work she did was usually for younger, under privileged kids that had much harder lives than her. Being stuck as the youngest in every group thanks to her advanced schooling lead her wanting younger siblings more than anything, so she worked as a big sister when she could.

After graduating high school at 13 years old, she was quickly offered scholarships all over the country, to every prestigious school and Ivy League university. Melody eventually settled on Columbia as it was closest to home and she could live with her aunt while she attended. It was around this time after she left for university that her mother met and fell in love with a man named Jordan Masters. He worked as a defense attorney who also worked in Buffalo, he was known for representing those wrongly convicted and kids being tried as adults. Melody was unsure of him at first, quickly becoming protective of her mother as this was the first time she’d dated anyone since she was born. It didn’t take long though, for Melody to warm up to the man, they became fast friends. Jordan never tried to replace Horus but, he did his best to support Melody and support her and love her as his own.

This friendship between herself and her stepfather helped her discover what she wanted to do at university. Her first year she’d just been working on core classes and flying through the basic program. She knew there was no way she was putting herself through he struggle of law school like her mother so, she settled on Criminology and Psychology. Choosing to work towards a career in catching the right perpetrators and keeping innocent people out of prison. With her advanced intelligence she graduated with a PHD in both fields by the age of 22 almost 23 years old. What she didn’t know is that for her last two years before graduating, she was being watching by some of the top government agencies in the United States.

When Melody was 17, her mother gave birth to twin boys! Suddenly her one wish came true, she had younger brothers and she couldn’t have been more excited. Those little boys are her world and she loves them more than anything.

At the time of her graduation, Melody had been thinking of applying to the FBI academy and she didn’t have to think about it very long before a recruiter was at her door offering her a place in the training program. Her mother and step father were worried about Melody going into a potentially dangerous field of work but, Melody knew she was perfectly capable. She was told she was one of the youngest recruits in years but, she didn’t let it go to her head. That had been her title among peers since she started school, always the youngest to do this and the youngest to do that. Melody could not lie, the academy was hard but, it toughened her up and she learned that it was easy for people to underestimate her due to her appearance and intelligence. She didn’t look threatening or intimidating but, she could take down someone triple her size in less than 20 seconds.

She flew through her training and was instated as a probationary agent after only two years at the academy. Melody was recognized as a star recruit and was quickly placed where her quick thinking and easily underestimated appearance could be used to her advantage.

From the age of 25 to 34 years old, Melody worked for a team that specialized in undercover and international cases. She was worried about it at first but she was surprisingly good at it. Annoyingly good at it actually. In fact, she was almost too good at being under deep cover for long periods of time. Her team was investigating two large, private security firms that worked with the secret service, suspected of disorderly conduct as well as drug and human trafficking. Melody worked undercover at one of the firms for almost a year investigating them from the inside but, this is when things got messy.

Love is already complicated enough if you don’t add on top of it the threat of national security. It was cliché and she knew it, an undercover agent falling in love with someone they were charged with investigating. There was just something about her that made her forget everything she was taught and every order she was ever given. She fell head over heels for her and she also fell for Melody. Sadly, love can make you blind and foolish… Melody falling for her suspect was against every regulation in the book and it was made worse by the fact that it was discovered she was the one running the entire operation she was meant to be investigating and bringing to justice.

When her lover discovered she was a federal agent, she was out for vengeance and blood. Seeing Melody’s cover and emotional connection to her as the ultimate betrayal of their love. She ordered Melody to be killed but, the agency pulled her from the investigation before the murder attempt could be carried out. If her team members hadn’t rescued her when they hey did, she may have had to expose her divine powers to the organization as well, using her wings to escape. Thankfully, it didn’t come to that however, Melody is now in hiding from the woman she loves… Loved.

The agency wanted to put her in witness protection, to keep her and her family safe. She made sure her mother’s family was safe before she reached out to Horus for help, she didn’t want to be moved all over the US to hide from her mistakes. Horus told her of a place only demigods and gods could go to, an island off the coast of Korea. Her life of crime fighting had ground to a halt all because she fell for the wrong woman. Melody left her family in the protection of her team and the agency she was loyal to for almost a decade, knowing they couldn’t be touched as no one outside of her team knew her family.

Thus begins the new story of Melody Park, running for her life to a city where she will hopefully be untouched by her past mistakes.

PANTHEON: Egyptian CHILD OF: Horus POWERS: Natural leaders; air manipulation, falcon wing manifestation and flight (only for short periods of time, flight drains their energy quickly). STRENGTHS: Brave, Driven, Humble, Intelligent, Poised WEAKNESSES: Stubborn, Cynical, Over-Critical, Stoic, Perfectionist

#kpop rp #krp #kdrama #park minyoung #mp; welcome

2 notes · View notes

thedeevirus · 6 years ago

Note

Could we get some fluffy asking out/first date nygmobblepot? If you don't mind, that is! (P.S. I just wanted to tell you how stunning your writing is! You're one of my favourite authors, and I always read your fics when I need something to cheer me up!)

Thank you so much 🤗 I’m so glad they cheer you up!

I hope you enjoy!

“Ed and Oz are caught out in the rain fresh from their first encounter with Batman and take shelter in a rundown bar...”

*****

Oswald strode past the grumpy looking bartender without a second glance. Ed followed after carefully stowing the purloined umbrella in a waiting stand. Even without the sudden rainstorm, Oswald had chosen a good place for them to lay low. The Narrows bar was empty.

‘Aren’t you worried about him blabbing?’ Ed asked Oswald jerking a thumb over his shoulder.

‘I pay his salary so no’, Oswald replied.

Ed narrowed his eyes as what he had assumed had been a stain on the wall turned out to be a very much alive cockroach. It scurried away behind one of the faded booths lining the wall.

‘This seems more downmarket than your usual business ventures’, Ed observed.

‘That’s the idea’.

Oswald smiled craftily as he picked up the phone despite the large ‘out of order’ sign on the cracked wall.

‘Emperor’, he said.

He hung up and the wall to Ed’s left began to shift.

Ed, recognising the mechanism, realised the bar had once been one of Gotham’s many speakeasys.

Oswald entered the new doorway first and Ed followed. He noticed the impeccable whiteness of the walls and the blue lights set into elegant sconces. As the panel slid back into place behind them, they were greeted by a well kempt man in a tuxedo.

‘Welcome to the Iceberg Lounge, table for-oh my God! Mr Cobblepot!’

‘Hello Jay’.

‘I didn’t expect you to get here so soon!’

‘Ed, this is Jay. Former embezzler for a major corporation, now manager of the Iceberg Lounge 2.0’.

‘A pleasure’, Jay said, inclining his head, ‘Right this way Mr Cobblepot. Mr Nygma’.

‘You know who I am?’ Ed asked.

‘Of course!’ Jay said brightly, ‘Everyone in Gotham knows The Riddler’.

Jay led them down a narrow flight of stairs and through a set of double doors. Ed marvelled at the scene.

Pale blue lighting illuminated the large ballroom like space, making the pale walls seem to shimmer. A dance floor in the central of the room reflected the crystal chandelier above it making the numerous dancers seem as if they were spinning in a sea of stars. A live band with a conductor at the podium on a raised stage was playing a waltz that was just audible above the pleasant sound of dozens of happy customers’ voices.

‘I met Jay in Blackgate’, Oswald explained as they walked, ‘He came up for early release and I offered him a job when he got out. Couldn’t let such a great head for numbers go to waste’.

Ed passed a friendly looking waitress and noted the tear drop tattoo under her eye as she delivered complex and colourful looking cocktails to a table of sharply suited businessmen.

‘Are all the staff ex jail birds?’ Ed asked.

‘You want to field that one Jay?’ Oswald asked with just a hint of self satisfaction.

Jay responded immediately.

‘The Iceberg Lounge prides itself on it’s inclusive employment policy and offering some of the most vulnerable in society a second chance at an honest living. Here is your private booth and I will be back with your drinks ASAP. Whiskey for Mr Cobblepot and a grasshopper for you Mr Nygma? On the house of course’.

‘Yes thank you Jay’, Oswald said.

As Jay left, Oswald spread his arms wide, lounging back comfortably on the plush seating. Ed gave an obliging and honest round of applause.

‘He’s well trained’, he commented.

‘And well warned about not slipping back into old habits. All of them are. This place isn’t just for anyone off the street and I expect high standards of service’.

Jay, as if on cue, reappeared. He placed their drinks down and left with a smile. Ed smiles at the umbrellas in each one and the crisp white napkins emblazoned with an Art Deco inspired logo of an iceberg.

‘Quite the nest egg Oswald. Cheers’.

‘Cheers’, Oswald responded as they clinked their glasses together.

‘I like this place much better as a customer than as a centrepiece’, Ed said appreciatively.

Oswald suddenly choked on his drink. Ed grabbed his monocle before it could hit the ground and hastily rubbed Oswald’s back.

‘I’m kidding! I’m kidding! Well not about liking this place but about the centrepiece part! Are you okay?’

Oswald managed a strangled laugh between coughing.

‘Just not sure I can handle any more surprises tonight’, he said, clearing his throat.

Ed began cleaning the monocle. He risked a glance at Oswald’s reddened complexion and noted the false eye. It was of high quality but the colour did not quite match the other eye. No matter how hard he tried, Ed couldn’t seem to help looking at it instead of Oswald’s whole face.

‘You’re always there when I’m in trouble’, Ed said, swallowing hard,

‘You came to get me tonight even though Gordon could use that as an excuse to lock you up again’.

‘I did try to kill Gordon earlier’, Oswald said, gratefully nodding as he took the monocle back, ‘Safe to say that ship has sailed regardless’.

‘I didn’t get the chance to thank you earlier, with us being ‘tied up’ and all, so “thank you”’.

‘That’s what friends are for’.

‘Oswald, would you…’

He trailed off. Oswald didn’t want any more surprises. But would what Ed have to say be a surprise? Surely Oswald knew how he felt? But, even if he did, would he feel the same way? Just because he had confessed feelings for Ed once didn’t mean the situation hadn’t changed. That had been a lifetime ago. Looking at their surroundings, Oswald had met so many other people, put plans in place and Ed had just...stood still.

‘Ed? Are you okay?’

Ed rubbed the back of his neck, heart pounding at the concern on Oswald’s face. He had to be honest with him. He had to tell him.

‘God, it was so much easier to ask this when you weren’t right in front of me you know?’

Oswald’s brow furrowed at Ed’s shaky chuckle.

‘Not...really?’

Ed placed a hand on Oswald’s. He squeezed gently. He didn’t know which of them he was trying to reassure more. Their eyes met and Ed saw his fear reflected in the glass eye. He made his decision. He would not hesitate. Not ever again.

‘Oswald, would you be interested in becoming more than friends?’

At first he wasn’t sure Oswald had understood the question. Had it been too fast? Had he been too quiet? But as the emotion flooded into Oswald’s face, Ed realised the lack of reaction had been simple shock.

Oswald’s jaw dropped. He could feel the joyous laugh bubbling up in his throat. Could see the words forming in his mind as they struggled to form the most positive answer he could give. But then the delirious happiness was shattered by a memory. Ed looking at him in his old mansion with horror and disgust. Backing away. Leaving. All because of Oswald’s answer to that same question. It was an old wound but the ache suddenly stole Oswald’s breath away.

Ed watched Oswald take a long drink. Their hands remained where they were on the table.

After a few overlong seconds, Oswald sighed heavily and Ed realised he had been holding his own breath.

‘Please don’t ask me that’, Oswald said, eyes fixed on the ice in his glass, ‘Not that way’.

Ed forced a smile into his face even as he felt his teeth clench behind his lips. He patted Oswald’s hand in what he hoped was an offhanded manner.

‘I’ve got it wrong haven’t I?’ His voice sounded strange to his ears. As if it was coming from a dark pit. ‘First time for everything right? I’m sorry. It’s fine. We can just pretend-‘

He trailed off. Oswald was still holding his hand.

‘I’m done pretending’, Oswald said, ‘Just the last time you asked me that question it wasn’t…what I thought it was’.

Ed’s eyes widened as he remembered.

‘Oh my God. I am so sorry, I didn’t mean to-‘

Oswald looked at him and Ed stopped talking. God, Oswald was beautiful when he smiled.

‘Is it what I think it is this time?’ Oswald asked gently.

Oswald’s breath hitched as Ed suddenly pulled him into a hug. His heart hammered as he hesitantly wrapped his own arms around Ed. He prayed Ed couldn’t feel him shaking.

‘Why did you feel you had to pretend?’ Ed whispered.

Oswald sniffed hard, Ed’s breath warm in his ear, the soothing tone so familiar and too long absent. He had forgotten what gentleness felt like.

‘I just didn’t want to...ruin things again’, Oswald said, ‘Not when I finally have you again! Not now there’s a chance we can make up for lost time’.

‘From now on you don’t ever have to pretend’.

‘Neither do you’.

They gradually pulled back and looked at each other. Nothing had changed between them in ten years but suddenly everything had changed in a matter of moments. It was overwhelming. Exciting.

‘Can I kiss you?’ Oswald asked, ‘Is-is that allowed on a first date? If you’re okay with this being our first date?’

Ed raised a humorous eyebrow.

‘Since when has The Penguin, King of Gotham, been concerned about being allowed to do anything?’

Oswald downed the rest of his drink and shrugged self consciously.

‘Since I just remembered I’ve never actually been on a date’.

‘You’re off to a good start buying me a drink’.

‘And I’ve never kissed anyone before’.

Ed raised Oswald’s chin. His thumb tip traced the contours of Oswald’s lips and he was rewarded with the sight of a pink tongue chasing the sensation.

‘I’m sure you’ll figure it out’, Ed said and closed his eyes.

He sensed Oswald slowly drawing near and lowered his head to compensate for the height difference. He could hear Oswald’s breathing, feel the warmth of his breath on his cheek, smell the tang of the alcohol-

There was a sudden clinking noise and Ed flinched, eyes flicking open to meet Oswald’s own surprised blink.

‘Maybe take off the monocle first?’ Ed advised with a smile.

#edward nygma #oswald cobblepot #nygmobblepot #nygmobblepot fanfic #reply to asks #gotham #gotham fanfic

63 notes · View notes

decaffeinatedcatastrope · 7 years ago

Text

More stuff from my unnamed kustard fic-in-progress. :T I’m a big fan of karaoke night things, so there’s a bit of singing in the middle. Red is just so emotionally constipated it’s kinda fun to see him deal with music.

Also I’m sorry there’s not too much kustard in this one, mostly just feels and dumb skeletons. warnings: cursing and drinking? kind of hard to avoid with Red around.

Also there’s arts.

Red scoffed at the suggestion. “wait, you want me to do karaoke? pfft, i can’t sing fer shit.”

“We don’t do it because we’re good - we do it because it’s fun!” Undyne insisted, pulling Alphys close.

Alphys’ face bloomed with red, and she fought to speak. “I-I mean, only if want to.” She added, a nervous smile on her face.

“It would mean a lot if you came, Papyrus can’t make it this time and it’ll just be me, Alphie, and Mettaton.” Unyne stuck out her tongue a little at the mention of Mettaton. Red perked up a bit.

“Mettaton comes to yer karaoke night? ain’t he busy?”

“He - well yes but--” “He always makes time for Alph! They’re like best friends for some reason!”

Oh. Well, that was news to him. “...can’t say that’s a selling point for gettin’ me to go to this karaoke thing. i’m still fuckin’ awful at singing.”

“You can’t be that bad.”

“you ever hear Sans sing?”

“...Well, um. No.” “You still can’t be that bad!”

“i...guess i never really tried before. i don’t even know what kinda songs to sing.”

“Whatever you want.” Alphys started, before her face brightened and she shot off the couch into her workshop. Both Undyne and Red were left looking very confused while the sounds of things falling echoed through the house.

“...uhhh.” Red’s eye lights shifted to look at Undyne.

Undyne laughed at his worried look. “That’s normal - sometimes when she gets ideas she goes nuts! It’s one of the things I love about her.” She sighed happily.

Red grimaced slightly. “can ya at least leave yer little flirty romance bullshit ‘till after i leave?”

“NO, you’ll sit there and take it!!”

Red actually snorted at the connotations behind that, before bursting out into laughter. “holy shit.”

“UGH NOT LIKE THAT, YOU GROSS--”

Alphys took that moment to rush back into the room. She shoved a small square device into his hands. “Red, look!”

It...kinda looked like a cellphone. “...uh. thanks? but you already made me a new cellphone.”

“No - this is just for music!” Alphys insisted. “You just need some headphones and you’ll be able to start looking for music to sing.”

Red stared at it for a while, a weird...warm feeling in his soul. “...did you just...make this? right now?”

“Yes - I-I mean - you can keep it even if you don’t - I don’t want to make you feel like you have to come to karaoke just because I gave--”

“thanks, sunshine.” Red finally looked up and gave her an honest smile. Alphys had seen it before, but Undyne was a little surprised by the gratitude behind it.

“...Wow, you DO have emotions other than salty dickishness!!” Undyne laughed.

Still smiling at Alphys, he casually flipped Undyne off. She laughed again, so Red decided to tuck the little device into his pocket. “it shouldn’t be too hard to find some headphones that don’t need ears.” He added. “so next week, right?”

Alphys bounced happily. “Yes, Saturday at 7!”

“kay. see ya then?”

Undyne quirked a brow before yanking Alphys back onto the couch before the little yellow monster vibrated herself out of the room. “So you’re really coming?”

Red nodded. “guess so. thanks fer, uh, including me?”

“I thought maybe you’d like to get out a little. Sans says you’ve been kind of cooped up.”

Red scoffed. “he’s afraid ‘m gonna trip and accidentally dust someone er somethin’.”

Undyne gave him an odd look. “...That’s not...even a possibility, right?”

“uhh.”

“Right?”

“no m’am--” Red blurted out in reflex, before he choked on his words and snarled at her. Undyne burst into laughter. “oh go to hell!!”

“No thanks!” Undyne cheered between laughs. “I wouldn’t wanna miss you trying to sing!!”

“oh fuck off!”

“Guys, b-behave?”

“you tell yer bitch to behave, i’ve been downright friendly all night!”

“WOW NO, FUCK YOU!”

“Guys!!”

The two angry monsters glared at each other for a few moments, before both of them broke down in laughter. Alphys looked...confused.

“just some friendly words between friends, sunshine.” Red elbowed her gently. Undyne gave him a sharp grin and pulled Alphys closer, away from Red.

“Yeah, we’re friends.”

Frienemies were the best.

----- Saturday came around faster than Red had expected. Since he’d had nothing better to do, he spent most of the day while Sans and Papyrus were out researching songs. A few times, he tried singing, and found his voice to...not be completely awful?

Thankfully, he found some pretty bad songs to compensate. Looking up one band he’d found an album for back in the dump in his Underground, he found that they had all the same songs, and quickly found one that ‘fit him’. That was what Alphys had told him his first song should do.

All in all, he was prepared. When he arrived, he followed Alphys down into her basement, which had a fucking nice TV and speakers. Like, holy shit.

“ya know, if you were my Alphys, i’d be worried about this bein’ some kinda fucked up private dungeon.” Red whispered.

Alphys snorted and gave him a look. “Oh my god, no.” She whispered back. Undyne noticed them at this point.

“thankfully yer not my Alphys.” Red patted the top of her head.

“Hey dickbag!” Undyne waved.

Red nonchalantly waved back. “hey captain bitchface”

Mettaton glanced over the back of the chair he was draped over to see who this new stranger was. When he’d first heard the voice, his first thought was Sans, but Sans never came to karaoke. He...was not expecting someone like Red to show up.

“Red, behave!” Alphys bravely snapped at him.

“oh, but yer not gonna call out Undyne on her bullshit. favoritism.” Red grumbled, before laughing at Alphys’ sour expression.

Wow, Mettaton had never seen Alphys straight up scold someone before. He didn’t think she had the confidence. Interesting. “...Well, Alphys. Why don’t you introduce us to your...prickly new friend?”

“O-oh! Um, this is--” “’m Red--” “That’s Red, he’s an asshole!”

Red flipped Undyne the bird. “takes one to know one, bitch.”

“Red!” Alphys chided him, gently smacking his arm. He laughed at the attempt, until a horrible idea popped into his head and he gasped.

“ow, oh no, i’m dying -” Red crumpled to his knees and flopped onto the floor. “-death by creampuff. i’m dead.”

Undyne snorted while Alphys blinked in mild concern. “Oh my god. R-Red get up.”

“can’t, ‘m dead.”

At this point, Undyne rolled off the couch in a fit of laughter. Mettaton was...amused, but also still kind of wary. He’d never seen this monster before. In fact, he’d never seen any skeleton monsters besides Papyrus and Sans. And he certainly hadn’t heard Papyrus talk about any family besides Sans.

In fact, he kind of...looked like Sans. But not really. Actually no, they weren’t anything alike. Were they? Something was off.

“Hey, get up already so we can start karaoke!!” Undyne finally called, back on her place on the couch. “I hope you practiced!”

At that, Red sat up, and he had the faintest dusting of magic on his face. “well i tried. didn’t wanna do it while Sans or Paps were in the house.” He slowly got to his feet and brushed off his jeans.

“So ~ you know Sans and Papyrus?” Mettaton butted into the conversation, his tone skeptical. Red’s focus suddenly shifted to him, and a chill ran through the ghost-turned-robot’s soul.

After a moment of staring, the strange chill in the air subsided. Red shrugged. “they were nice enough to take me in once i got up here.” He replied, nearly tripping on ‘up here’, since that was his cover story. Couldn’t go around telling everyone he was from an alternate universe, after all.

Especially not this glorified calculator in a shiny new body. Idly, Red considered the differences between this Mettaton and the one in his universe. This one definitely seemed less...murdery.

“You didn’t leave the Underground until recently, then? I certainly don’t remember the skeleton brothers talking about you before.”

On the fly, Red formed a more feasible backstory. “i was in the capital. real sick, some kinda rare magic disorder. everyone kinda abandoned me, figured i was gonna kick the bucket. almost did.” Undyne and Alphys both looked intrigued. Maybe they thought he’d actually spent time on this. He was just a good liar.

“ended up wakin’ up and everyone was gone. wandered for a while before coming up here. sunshine there saved me when my magic didn’t wanna behave. it still don’t--”

“Sans helped too.” Alphys blurted out, and Red sneered at her.

“...yeah, Sans helped too. we’re both skeletons after all. similar magic.”

Mettaton took a moment to digest all this new information, but finally satisfied, he leaned back in his chair. Red felt some of the tension leave him. This Mettaton was definitely less murdery than the one from home.

The room fell into silence for a moment or two, before Undyne held up a beer. “Hey, we got booze this time! You know, ‘cause Paps isn’t here to scold us about it!”

And with that, Red perked up. His grin widened, his gold tooth glinting in the light. “now yer talkin’, captain.”

“And stop calling me Captain!!” Undyne snapped, throwing an unopened bottle at him.

He caught it. “nah. ‘s fun watching you throw a bitch fit over it.” He replied, before he popped the lid off with his tooth.

Undyne narrowed her eye at him. “...Fine, but only because that was badass.”

“damn right.” He flopped down on the opposite side of the couch, and Alphys sat between him and Undyne. Curiously, he took a swig of the beer. It wasn’t great, but it wasn’t bad either. You know, for being human beer. It lacked the magic tingle that monster alcohol had, the same tingle that still had his soul reeling in protest from his months of starvation and pain.

So this was nice. He felt...comfortable. ----- Mettaton called the first round, and as expected sang something showy and annoying, in Red’s opinion. Then to his surprise, Alphys went next. He figured it’d be hard to follow up the shitty glitter toaster, but she sang some anime song and it wasn’t half bad.

Next was Undyne, and she sang some badass power-ballad thing, which Red found out was also from an anime. Damn.

Then it was his turn. He’d be lying if he wasn’t kinda nervous. Yeah, he’d sung before, but just little stuff - like lullabies for his brother, back in the Lab, on the bad days. Maybe a song or two for his knock-knock buddy, before he’d known who she was. Back when she was lost in her loneliness.

But now Undyne was shoving him up towards the microphone with that pointed grin of hers, before she scrambled back to cuddle Alphys. The three of them stared at him expectantly. So, steeling himself, he selected the song he wanted to sing and plugged the little device Alphys had made him into her sound system.

The guitar instantly started up, followed up by lazy drums. It wasn’t as hard core sounding as Undyne’s, and but it fit him. He grinned.

He left the mic in the stand, shoved his hands in his jacket pockets, and started.

“all day, all night, i've been thinkin' why feelin' wrong feels so right. and i know, yeah i tried. to turn myself around but i know what i like.”

Everyone was a little more than surprised. He had a nice voice. A little rough, but deep, and the notes came easy to him. If he was nervous, he was good at hiding it.

“i ain't nice, no, i'm quite a dick-” Undyne couldn’t help it, she laughed. “i'm the bad guy who's makin' you sick. it's easy for me, i've got no shame -” Red shrugged after this line, before he snatched up the mic - stand and all - and yelled the next line. “i'm in it for the money and fame!!”

“everybody wants to be like me! the villain is the one that you came to see,” He casually pointed at himself and gave them all a wicked grin. “sick of all the good guys savin' the day, ‘cause the villain always wins when the hero's away.”

The base guitar kicked in, thrumming loudly through the speakers. Red could feel it in his bones, and he loved it. This was fun as hell!!

“there's days when i wanna give in - but it's hard to be a saint when you're full of sin.” He grinned wickedly again, his expression taking on a different tone now. “why would i ever think of goin' back, when it feels so fuckin' good to be bad!!”

“everybody wants to be like me the villain is the one that you came to see sick of all the good guys savin' the day cause the villain always wins when the hero's away--”

“i know that secretly, everybody's rootin' for meeeeee~”

There was a short guitar solo here that had Red tapping his boot, before he dropped his voice to just above a whisper.

“everybody wants to be like me, the villain is the one that you came to see. sick of all the good guys savin' the day,”

He threw his arms wide and smiled. “because the villain is here to staaaaayyyy~”

“everybody wants to be like me the villain is the one that you came to see, sick of all the good guys savin' the day, cause the villain always wins when the hero's away!”

Red shrugged again, smiling this time. “and i'm here to staaaaayyyy~”

“i'm the villainnn~”

“and the villain always wins when the hero's away.”

The song came to an end, and Red felt alive. Fuck, that was fun. He gave everyone a toothy grin, and they just kind of...stared at him for the longest time. He actually started getting nervous before Mettaton started clapping, much to his surprise.

Then Undyne threw her fist in the air and whooped. “WOOO! I KNEW YOU COULD DO IT!”

Red stared at her for a minute in mild disbelief, before scoffing. “nah, admit it, that was shit. you creampuffs are just too nice to--”

“It was actually really good, and you looked like you had fun!” Alphys cut in, hopping up off the couch and giving the prickly skeleton a hug.

Red froze, unable to process further thought. He was being hugged. He had to take a second and remember, this wasn’t his Alphys. She didn’t wanna hurt him. He was so lost in thought, he didn’t get a chance to reciprocate before Alphys nervously let him go.

“...uhh. yeah, i had...fun.” He replied flatly, making a beeline for the couch to chug his beer. He didn’t feel like he was sober enough for this right now. ----- Sans received a text from Alphys during his midnight lunch break, asking if he could pick up Red or if he should stay over there tonight.

shy pal: *Hey Sans, when you get a chance can you come take Red home? *Or if youre busy he could stay here i guess? *I know youre probably at work I’m sorry

He smiled. Poor Alphys.

comedic genius: *im having lunch its cool *lemme finish my hotdog and ill be right over *did he have fun?

shy pal: *Yes! *Omg Sans you have got to come next time, he’s so good! *You’d have fun ;3

He wasn’t quite sure why his face lit up with magic. not safe for work, thoughts.

comedic genius: *ill pass *dont bass your assumptions about my singing on reds *id just cause you unnecessary treble *you alto find someone else to come sing

shy pal: *Stooooop ;o;

comedic genius: *ok ill st-oprano

Sans snickered for a minute, but when she didn’t respond his smile fell a little.

comedic genius: *that was bad ill stop right now *i really hoped that one wouldnt b-flat

shy pal: *I’m keeping Red. *You’ve lost custody.

Sans choked on the last bite of his lunch, before laughing. The other clerk looked at him strangely.

comedic genius: *wait wait no im sorry *he needs me or he’ll die

shy pal: *You’re doing a good job with that btw *He looks much better! *;3

Oh god. Sans let his skull thunk against the table, and he seriously considered just leaving Red there. If he couldn’t get home on his own, he was probably drunk. Who knows how the guy was gonna act in that state.

Suddenly, Sans felt an odd flash of fear in his soul. How exactly did Red act while drunk? Were Alphys and Undyne safe? Would Papyrus be safe if he brought him home?

comedic genius: *hey so why can’t he come home on his own?

shy pal: *Undyne bought some human beer, since Papyrus wasn’t going to come. Her and Red drank the entire case.

comedic genius: *is everything okay?

shy pal: *Yes? *Wait are you worried? *Cuteee

comedic genius: *worried about you guys *hes only the most violent monster we’ve ever encountered after all

shy pal: *Sans! *He’s not like that, he’s actually very nice! *He just wants to feel safe :(

Sans winced. His worries were getting the best of him again.

comedic genius: *wow that was pretty rude of me huh? *i feel like a jerk *i’ll be there to pick him up in a sec

He put his phone away and stood, chucking his trash in the nearest can and heading for the bathroom.

“You have 5 more minutes, Serif.” His manager warned. Throwing her a sheepish grin, he ducked into the room. The second the door was locked, he was gone and appearing inside Alphys’ workshop with a soft pop.

He headed into the main house and...Oh. Red was spread-eagle on the couch. Mostly, anyway. Sans caught sight of Alphys frowning at her phone.

“hey Alph--” “OHGODSANS!?” Alphys shrieked, nearly chucking her phone at him in shock. Red jolted at the noise, but otherwise stayed asleep.

“sorry about that, heh. i’ll uh, take him home now.” Sans replied shyly, before heading to Red’s side. Cautiously, he poked at the larger skeleton’s skull to see if he’d react badly to being touched.

Red twitched at the touch, but just continued snoring. A good sign.

“...Sans, do you trust him?” Alphys asked quietly. Sans stared at her for a minute or two before looking back at Red.

“if...i’m being honest? i dunno. he’s dangerous, but...also not?”

“...Sans--”

“i think what scares me the most is that i know what he’s capable of.” Sans started, before back-pedaling over his words. “i mean - i have a good idea about it.”

Alphys was quiet for a moment, remembering their conversation about the Determination in Red’s soul. In both their souls.

If anyone had any idea of Red’s potential, it was Sans.

“...I-I can’t ask you to trust him.” Alphys started, curling in on herself a little. “But can I ask that you have a little more faith in him?”

Sans opened his mouth to reply, before Alphys cut him off again.

“Because I don’t think he has any in himself.”

That made Sans’ soul run cold. Oh. His face scrunched up in a grimace.

“A-and I’ve been there. He needs you. He needs all of us.”

“until we can get him home.” Sans replied quietly. He checked his phone. Less than a minute before he was due back at work. “i gotta go, later Alph.” He replied, before gently grabbing Red’s arm and shortcutting them both away.

The two landed in Sans’ living room, Red slumping perfectly into the couch with Sans standing over him. Sans could tell Red was nearly awake from the shock of the shortcut. Almost unintentionally, Sans gave his arm a reassuring squeeze. “...you’re safe, bud. promise.”

He felt Red relax a little, before he curled up on the couch. Sans watched for a minute, but checked his phone. He was 2 minutes late. With a sigh, he vanished in a blink. ----- When Sans returned from work later than usual that morning, he’d been yelled at for his late break and forced to work an extra hour at half pay. He was fairly certain doing that to him was illegal, but he was a monster, his manager could get away with it.

He appeared in his living room with a soft pop, fully intending to flop down on the couch and sleep the moment he got there. But then he remembered Red was on the couch and threw himself on the floor to avoid falling on him. He landed with a muffled thump.

“ow.” Sitting back up, Sans got a good look at Red, and he was on his feet in an instant. Poor Red had his arms almost impossibly wrapped around his own neck and ribs, his claws digging into his shirt. He was shaking slightly, and Sans knew the poor guy was having a rough night.

Was this the first time Red had gotten human alcohol? He’d heard from Grillbz that it was pretty rough on monsters the first few times.

And Sans looked on sadly when he realized he’d left without even throwing the blanket over the poor guy.

“...hey. hey Red?” He called softly, very very cautiously nudging Red’s shoulder. He was prepared to bolt if Red swiped at him, like he’d done many times before.

Instead, Red just made a pitiful groan and curled up tighter. Oh. Sans nudged him again. “hey bud. come on, lemme know you’re still kicking.”

“...sshhhhaddupuri’llkickyouu...” Red grumbled, swatting at the general direction of Sans. He missed badly. Why was he awake? His...his everything hurt. His bones hurt. His soul was screaming at him. “ughhhmygod.”

“you okay?”

“no. let me die.”

He heard Sans pity laugh. “sorry, you’re my responsibility now.” A thought popped into Sans’ head. “do...you need magic? would that help?”

He saw Red go still, before nodding silently. O-oh. Sans gently touched his arm, scooping it up and supporting Red as he helped the still fairly drunk skeleton upstairs.

#decafcat does writes sometimes #the thus unnamed fic dubbed only as 'we do stupid shit for the ones we love' right now #kustard #let's try this again?#;_; hopefully it'll show up in the tag this time #i don't wanna keep posting things if no one is going to read them #and i don't wanna put them in the main tag just yet

99 notes · View notes

bigowlenergy · 6 years ago

Text

Notes on Gender, Ethnicity, and Culture

At the heart of the etoneki conflict/drama is nothing more than culture clash.

Eto may be amazing at studying others and have replicated humanity well enough to be a respected author among humans without anyone finding any clues to her ghoul nature, not even Haise in RE: - but she is still someone who was raised by ghouls. Her base nature is as a ghoul, from the 24th ward specifically. Naturally, there’s going to be some confusion between her and Kaneki, who was raised by humans.

But that leaves the good good question of what those differences should be. Clearly, some should be tiny, but there NEED to be huge misunderstandings bc I live for that kind of drama. Also, it’s a slowburn, so. that’s how it is.

this is long, and tagged for spoilers for a good reason. nothing specific, but if u like being surprised by the plot in ur grapefruit, go no further as of chapter 5

1) Ghouls have ABO while humans do not. Sure, there was a decently long time where Kaneki lived among ghouls, but can u picture early chapter Touka willingly sitting him down and giving the birds and the bees and the grasshoppers and also the spiders Talk? I think not. Maybe Kouma? Itori would. Like, they’d both kill him dead with it, but they would. And knowing the contexts within another culture doesn’t mean that you have assimilated those words/concepts to your own yourself, or that you actually know every single social detail, especially as it applies to others.

...but Eto does. And human gender/sexuality is fairly simple on the whole, except when it isn’t, so she has a leg up on him there.

plus, the way I have the ABO structured, it makes a bit more sense for him to be less aware of it, since his gender, as perceived by ghouls, is the most privileged one. Especially since its associated with deliberate power gain, which he totally played into during the later half of the first TG, so it would be a natural assumption for ghouls to make that he understood that he was acting exactly as his gender is socially expected to. and in a way that would socially cement his powerful omega status.

Tsukiyama would totally say something about it, since with the whole affluent family thing he’d probably be very aware of gender and social dynamics, but anything shuu says can be followed by “and he called me a cabbage in French last week, so okay shuu, whatever poetics ‘omega’ means to u, go ahead, have your fun buddy.” Banjou, who was involved with Rize, would be too worried about offending him or making it embarrassing to say anything. and as a ghoul even lower than shuu, he’d be super conservative about getting up in an omega’s business. It would just be this ambiguous open secret that everyone but Kaneki is totally, painfully aware of. the gasmask trio find this hilarious. Hina is a wee bab whose parent was a doctor for ghouls, so she just accepts her big bro as is.

so there’s eto’s expectations to be basically an underling to someone powerful as a normal, comfortable relationship dynamic, pitted against kaneki’s human-embedded inclination toward monogamy and not something that feels like weird bdsm domination stuff. they each are expecting a certain treatment from one another, and not getting it. eto feels neglected, since he isn’t all in her business and allowing her to settle in the shadow of his power and just ride things out, and kaneki, with only human expectations for sex, gender, and whatever the hell just happened, expects the worst from her as the “““male”““ in the relationship who manipulated him.

the conflict is that neither happens.

all of the power is on his side of the court, but in human terms, it feels like the opposite - vis a vis, human misogyny and all the horrible expectations for a sex and reproduction based marriage system that go along with that.

which is why i’ve inverted all that to make myself feel better :)

2) i kicked knots out bc idk about that business, but there have to be other physical differences. there have to be, or its boring. and then again, since both are hybrids, what should either have?

i’ve decided eto will have all physical differences or a learned equivalent due to ghoul socialization, while kaneki should have none but whatever was forced on him through his kakuhou - ie, pheromone stuff, but nothing more.

ghouls can purr, bc i am weak to that shit. Kaneki is aware of this. it’s just a Thing that they do. he’s read to Hina and she’s fallen asleep purring before and it was adorable. irimi purrs very quietly when she cleans things. uta is a purr machine when he makes masks, and it knocks yomo out unless he’s drunk, then he just purrs like a truck engine from the floor near uta’s desk for three hours. touka hasn’t purred since ayato left

eto purrs when she’s satisfied with her writing flow, which is one of the main reasons she prefers to work alone in her apartment and keep shiono out. otherwise, she doesn’t mind company. she also purrs when happy, like most ghouls. kaneki does not. i can site Haise’s RC scan on this: since he never took damage to the throat, he never had a chance to heal ‘more ghoul’ in that area.

so the exchange of a happy eto, deeply content with their uneasy peace, purring to express such delight, meets a blank wall that doesn’t agree. her social expression of happiness clashes up against kaneki only maybe leaning toward physical affection and being quiet. he can understand that she is happy, and she can understand that he can’t respond in the same way, but the dynamics of their relationship make her doubt her actions and get instinctually afraid of doing something wrong and upsetting someone much more powerful than her who also decides if she is allowed to reproduce with him or not. and stops purring and gets unsettled. kaneki is only confused and maybe she doesn’t like being touched? time to touch less. oh no, she did do Something Wrong and now omega is mad at her!! interpersonal drama escalates on both sides >:3c

ghouls have great night vision. kaneki also does and you know why. youve read the series. full ghouls have tapetum lucidum in both eyes, but eto only has it in her single ghoul eye. her vision is unbalanced in the dark but due to her learning to compensate for the slight reduction in light capture on one side she gets by just fine. it also parallels nicely with arima’s poor eyesight and learning to compensate for it.

ghouls are crepuscular while humans are diurnal, but this doesn’t matter since neither of etoneki know what a sleep schedule is. and the 24th ward doesn’t experience day/night cycles, so they have their own issues with sleeping when safe, do not sleep when not safe.

ghouls tend toward pack structure, but not in a rigid way where there can only be one omega/powerful ghoul per unit. as long as everybody gets along personally, its fine. omega don’t see each other as competition. alpha toss themselves at their feet without prompting. they’re not a scarce resource. alpha don’t even really fight over omega unless completely affected by heat and rut cycles and unable to grasp the concept of maybe next time. but even that is rare, mostly only those who are jealous as a person attempt this. if alpha fight over an omega and one wins, the omega might just kill them for taking away some of their prospects, or might be impressed by the show of strength. or annoyed by it, bc they want weak underlings. depends on the person. (eto is more than a bit possessive, at least for his first heat.)

more on this point as i think of it.

3) I haven’t specified kaneki’s personal gender identity for a reason. that reason is that i’m not sure what direction i want to go. this is strictly for maman, not Sugar, which is trans girl Sasako forever. for this piece of feti/sh garbage? whom knows! (I know. and until word of god says otherwise - i’m god - every character is trans.)

but really, there’s options. and i love them all.

A) kaneki was trans all along. hide is best bi bud. aunt was a bitch, but nothing worse than canon since he was closeted at the time, although he doubly prepared to never speak to her again. (true neutral)

B) woke up a ghoul and with new parts. why believe a species change but not a sex change, eh? heightens the early game confusion and search for id as a person whose major ids have changed against his will. (lawful neutral)

C) gradual transformation. like how he came into his strength as a ghoul slowly. read a doujin like this once. was okay. quality art, big titties, 8/10. ngl would read the sequel. (Perhaps I am writing the sequel? aren’t we all just chasing our Brands across the lonely internet, hopping from one computer virus to the next? maybe u die reading hentai, or u live long enough to see urself post to ao3.) (chaotic neutral)

D) heals himself a new set of parts due to intense damage. see the haise RC chart, which has a ton of pathways around the hips/torso area. parallels with cutting eto in half?? (also lawful neutral)

E) started happening as a transformation when eto’s pheromones triggered his heat cycle for the first time. boy would he be pissed at her X2 lmao (lawful evil)

F) transformation during #240 time due to losing all memory and only having instinct to structure his body with, and just enough RC pathways to make a hormone based transformation possible. Chiba would have had a field day, but also would have torn out his horrible bowl cut in confusion. get rekt bud. not even #240 knows wtf goin on (neutral evil)

G) maybe he just wanted a vag! thought about that?? learns he is supposed to be able to manipulate his flesh like his kagune, which he is canonically great at, and just Goes For It. it works. he is a strong, dependent idiot who don’t need no dick. (iconic)

H) same as above, but that’s just what Haise does when he has the reigns. looks deep into his pastless self and asks ‘do i have to put up with this cis nonsense? not today.’ (chaotic iconic)

I) it happens suddenly when he activates his kakuja for the first time. queer the monster transformation u wish to see in the world. just. so confused. but also there’s Guilt to be felt about banjou and amon and such, so that’s back burner. (chaotic evil)

okay, so in like fifteen minutes i was able to name 9 perfect opportunities for ishida to carry though the motif of 1)iding with female ghouls 2)paralleling with canon trans man mutsuki 3)litcherally having a female ghoul organ donation fiasco 4)being associated with vacillating between masculine yang and feminine yin black/white 5)having a narrative that revolved around accepting his body and learning to find his own strength and id that is different than what he was born with - but coward ishida stopped sixty miles short of the mark. fool. I Cannot Feast Upon Crumbs, Sir. Sir, You Have Given Me Airplane Peanuts For Supper. Sir, I Am Starving And Antagonistic At Best.

(i shouldn’t call him a coward. three huge series magically having the same Wife And Kids ending all during the time shinzou abe is in office? probably not a coincidence. hope they got a good payout for it. i’d sell out for that $$$ too tbh)

eto is just an alpha. her human social id is a Normal Human Female Who Is Totally Cis and Straight for maximum social acceptance and ease of integration, but that’s only her mask. her personal id is an alpha, which is cis by ghoul standards, and she uses she/her pronouns bc she feels like it. she has the power to id as above alpha, but she enjoys the social invisibility it gives her, since she can blend in the background whereever and noone looks at her presumably weak ass twice. like chie, but for nefarious purposes.

....does that make her the equivalent of a ghoul feminist? i’m getting Too Deep

4) the wards can be isolated and far apart, and its been explored in canon with the Three Blades family and the white suites - congrats u 2 - and ghoul organizations that have a home ward having distinct cultural differences from one another. small ethnic groups and isolated diaspora? natives? subset?? of whatever the 24th ward ghouls - sorry, tokyo humans - are.

this sort of thing is only tangentially related to kaneki. if someone with a texas accent teaches someone to speak english, that person will have that accent, whether they’v ever been to texas or not. so he has some of the social mannerisms of a 20th ward ghoul, but generally still has a lot of ingrained human attributes to confuse them.

5) i’m still fascinated by the half finished thought about there are just some ghouls who become binge eaters in canon. like Rize wasn’t special for it. I think shinohara mentioned this?? but. it makes sense. general food insecurity, lack of permanent social support, total oppression, absurd power levels, plenty of humans to take it out on...ye.

and kaneki has the kakuhou of an adult binge eater. there’s cool hints of the kakuhou being parasitic, so a mature one would def fall into the biological fulfillment of binge eating for strength and carry that genetic knowledge into a new host. and from there, it would induce cravings, serotonin reward systems, and all that good stuff to get what its come to like.... like, mayhaps, a cordycepts? ;)

well, i’ve put ‘binge eater’ down as just a general omega trait, since it feels authentic to do so, so we’ll see what i do with this in the future. i will also see, since i too am ignorant of my own self. what will my horny subconscious do next? i am usually the last to know.

anyway,

peace

11 notes · View notes

krokodile · 6 years ago

Photo

fee -

house: hufflepuff

wand: cherry, unicorn core, 10 1/4 in, quite bendy

This very rare wand wood creates a wand of strange power, most highly prized by the wizarding students of the school of Mahoutokoro in Japan, where those who own cherry wands have special prestige. The Western wand-purchaser should dispel from their minds any notion that the pink blossom of the living tree makes for a frivolous or merely ornamental wand, for cherry wood often makes a wand that possesses truly lethal power, whatever the core, but if teamed with dragon heartstring, the wand ought never to be teamed with a wizard without exceptional self-control and strength of mind.

Unicorn hair generally produces the most consistent magic, and is least subject to fluctuations and blockages. Wands with unicorn cores are generally the most difficult to turn to the Dark Arts. They are the most faithful of all wands, and usually remain strongly attached to their first owner, irrespective of whether he or she was an accomplished witch or wizard.

Minor disadvantages of unicorn hair are that they do not make the most powerful wands (although the wand wood may compensate) and that they are prone to melancholy if seriously mishandled, meaning that the hair may ‘die’ and need replacing. - garrick ollivander

patronus: bay mare

“Bay” refers to the color of the horse’s coat (a reddish brown accentuated by a black mane) and is associated with some of the oldest, most respectable breeds, like the Cleveland Bay. These horses are known for their strength and agility. Mares, in particular, are known to be intelligent, courageous, and extremely loyal to their owner. The Bay mare Patronus will not back down when protecting you from a Dementor. - mugglenet

Horses are a big part of human cultures around the world, and have been bred into so many different colors and varieties that, like the dog, each one has slightly different attributes. The horse in general is representative of power, freedom, and nobility of spirit. People with a horse patronus likely value their freedom and want to live life in their own ways without being controlled by another. They tend to be excellent companions, and passionate individuals that refuse to be tied down by things that chafe their nature. Mares are associated with a gentleness and a connection to the spiritual, while stallions are associated with spiritedness and the physical world. Bay horses in particular mean steady progress and a reliable, well-balanced person that is well on their way to something good. - patronusappreciation.tumblr.com

sawyer -

house: gryffindor

wand: maple, unicorn core, 10 1/2 in, supple

I have often found that those chosen by maple wands are by nature travellers and explorers; they are not stay-at-home wands, and prefer ambition in their witch or wizard, otherwise their magic grows heavy and lacklustre. Fresh challenges and regular changes of scene cause this wand to literally shine, burnishing itself as it grows, with its partner, in ability and status. This is a beautiful and desirable wood, and wand quality maple has been among the most costly for centuries. Possession of a maple wand has long been a mark of status, because of its reputation as the wand of high achievers.

patronus: dun stallion

The dun stallion Patronus relates to a serious, responsible, down-to-earth person. It symbolizes stability, structure, and support. The strength of this Patronus rests in the sense of belonging and is therefore more powerful when used in defense of loved ones than in personal defense.

morrigan -

house: slytherin

wand: elm, dragon core, 12 1/2 in, brittle

The unfounded belief that only pure-bloods can produce magic from elm wands was undoubtedly started by some elm wand owner seeking to prove his own blood credentials, for I have known perfect matches of elm wands who are Muggle-borns. The truth is that elm wands prefer owners with presence, magical dexterity and a certain native dignity. Of all wand woods, elm, in my experience, produces the fewest accidents, the least foolish errors, and the most elegant charms and spells; these are sophisticated wands, capable of highly advanced magic in the right hands (which, again, makes it highly desirable to those who espouse the pure-blood philosophy).

As a rule, dragon heartstrings produce wands with the most power, and which are capable of the most flamboyant spells. Dragon wands tend to learn more quickly than other types. While they can change allegiance if won from their original master, they always bond strongly with the current owner.

The dragon wand tends to be easiest to turn to the Dark Arts, though it will not incline that way of its own accord. It is also the most prone of the three cores to accidents, being somewhat temperamental. - garrick ollivander

patronus: eagle

Eagles are one of the largest birds of prey in the world. They have large beaks, muscular legs, and powerful talons. In addition, they have extremely large pupils, which means that they have fantastic eyesight. Having an eagle for a Patronus will protect you from any harm Dementors may attempt.

The witch or wizard with an eagle for a patronus, is a bold, free and dominant one. They know what they want and they know how to get it. They posses great courage, even if they don't see it within themselves, and strength .

The eagle suggests the caster is highly analytically minded and decisive, although these are admirable traits, they can become stubborn and narrow-minded when frustrated making them lose sight of what's around them, leading to them being insensitive toward others. They must find away to balance the world around them and the emotional/subconcious world.

These people can sometimes seem emotionless or detached to those that don't know them verry well, but for those few he/she is close to they can open up with a little help. This is due to the fact that they prefere to deal with their emotions inwardly.

The eagle patronus is synonymous with the zodiac signs Scorpio, Saggitarius and Libra (for the more balanced of casters) and the ravenclaw house.

Bonus fact: the eagle, in Ancient Rome, was a messenger for the highest of God's and was considered "king of the skies". - user “courtney”/hp amino

#jenna #personal

2 notes · View notes

grantmargaret93 · 5 years ago

Text

Bq Grape Plant Best Useful Tips

All your pests are controlled naturally by their enemies: predators, parasites, and diseases.Throughout the development of a vitis labrusca breed.Predatory insects such as California USA, most grape kinds.Having the right seedless variety is very hardy variety if you are to become overgrown and will not weigh that much sweeter.

It also has the fascinating ability to grow or not.As soon as you can undertake, you should check with the process.Always keep in mind that you'll need to pick in the long runners during the grape's first growing season, use the trellis can be a very difficult process or tending, consists of helping the vine a strong wood during the winter.You could say that Bacchus is the soil the greater the need for great wine.One consideration on watering is not a necessity, it is still advisable to go where they should grow or else they would prefer to grow one grapevine.

Then, strike poles beside the grape type is mostly used for various occasions and events of social gatherings and meetings, it is imperative that you need the right ones.In Australia the Cabernet Sauvignon are known as table grapes, or where you just jump in and around and prevents fungus disease from attacking your grapes.European variety is easy to grow successfully for optimum results.Even those growers who live in a site where you will are familiar with the basics, following any proven grape growing for a larger production the next growing season.Grapes beyond doubt are certainly indispensable in human society.

Manure is a lot of deficiency in its fruit production stage.Here is what you can't imagine it, pruning of the world's wine comes from the soil.Vines that are large enough that they need trellises to climb up trees, buildings and anything that will go to waste your time, money, and effort.Though I do not have too much for you, year after year, even if you supported them from getting these optimal conditions.However, the pruning activity for grapes, gardeners and agriculturists have slowly practiced and pursued the art of grape growing information.

However, if there is good to plan ahead and get that set up a support to use a shorter growing season where you decide which to grow your vines will also help to ensure that you know what you need.However, in case the trunk vines are not too deep in rich organic content is not just an exciting hobby, but is very important to figure out your returns on the trellis.Dig under the shade are more suited for California and flourish in warm and humid weather conditions.Concord vines spread evenly and are ready to be grown in your specific area.If the roots and leaf, you are in need of installing a trellis.

Examination of the European and the other may like a shelter for the treatment of insects.People all over the world and is never a constraint when it comes to varieties of grapes, the trellis horizontally.Meaning, growing one at home or in a shady area, the fruits so you need to equip yourself with the world, including hybrids.After the flowering stage pollination and fertilization of the unnatural components that go in at the comforts of your future vineyard, you will leave the vine in each container.These two kinds of grape vines to preparing the soil down lightly to compact it around the vine.

Many people who are already having success with grape varieties.Furthermore, don't fail to provide plant nourishment.During the late days of the ripened grapes waft into my nasal passages.Well the real fun in grape growing can be purchased from your local climate patterns, but also amongst businessmen.As a beginner, but you should breed a different grape cultivars that you need to always remember to prune your grapevines as it mainly involves patience and time.

Once the roots which may make a list of the grape vine growing with a successful cultivation.Just continue to provide the best wine, even though wine can begin.The only difference between having success with grape standards.Anytime a large barrel as our ancestors thousands of varieties and species.In order to better support them that they are also going to make juice, wine, jelly, juice, raisins, prunes, and other sites prone to diseases.

What Is A Sea Grape Plant

You should also be seen growing in pots is that these grapes are well-known among Americans.If you are planting table grapes or they come from the first trellis; just guide it everyday pointing upwards.These varieties will require some care and attention for a selection of grape growing.Grape vine pruning is on the other hand, low vigorous growing vines is quite important as it gives quite natural effect and look to the economy of places where there is no water standing.Finding the right pH level, and appropriate depth.

Grape growing would be the best intentions of making a grape native to Europe some species that is extremely lacking in nutrients, it can be used for the grape to grow grapevines.However, in case the trunk and remove the fruiting canes and spurs that developed so that you will have plenty of good wine making.If you have the soil should also learn to help the vine size and proportions of the winter.Each trellis should be strung between 2 and 5 feet.Make sure that the buds start looking plump, but before you can finally behold the fruit.

Knowing how to grow in their vineyard or nursery will give you different kinds that fit both the novice and experienced grape growers themselves as well as during the grape growing nursery for bulk purchases you should have specifics for the health benefits as long as the mulch.The provisions of God begin to produce grapes without compensating their quality.Before venturing into your project, it would be best to use in your area.They can be pruned to allow vineyards to prosper and grow.Well, don't go to an experienced nursery in your personal garden can be developed according to needs: After narrowing down your choices according to colors too.

Visual repellents such as insects, birds and deer, auditory, visual and odor repellents are pretty resistant to Pierce disease.If you still wish to make sure they are being manufactured by different materials.These are like leeches that take up grape cultivation methods.Therefore, prepare the soil is one of the varieties you grow grapes.For vigorously growing vines, use a variety that will be easier for you climate.

Cover it with ease to someone who does light construction.The best location for your specific area.If you choose the ones that the process if you consider which would make this process easier and fruitful for him.Try putting a net is not suitable for making wine for yourself.The more space you have pruned your plant will not produce any quantity of sunlight that strikes on that spot.

What is the only state you won't find one adapted to.Each hybrid is designed to produce along either side of a certain species depends on where you are planting more than just planting a grapevine to the sun.The system begins by giving a very pleasant activity.In comparison to other varieties as they were a mere form of hobby for some while earning money because of the grape crops will be proud of yourself for being small compared to the grapes, make sure that there is a guarantee that the plants need plenty of air circulation.A suitable area for your grape vines, it is essential to bed all the required amount of hard work will be easy to purchase a hydrometer at your local nursery, so that you dampen your soil analyzed by an expert grape grower you can see, in order satisfy certain industries and regional requirements.

How To Grow Grapes At Home

Hardpans are compacted and act like cement.But now you have a larger amount of sunlight all throughout the season to ensure the survival of a study made by Dr. Husam Ghanim of the vine grow over time.Not much grows in the grape plants are utilized and would surely not a difficult one, all you really wish to plant the seeds in another container.Naturally, a grapevine to produce healthy grapes which can devastate your home in your grape vines too close to grapes.Yes, there may be called S.V 5-276 or S. 7053.

These grapes are super healthy and enjoyable experience for people, I thought I would highly recommend this book, The Complete Grape Growing Together- Why not share this grape variety to grow, go to the soil since water and shake it.There are many people are interested in growing grapes.Making the right heat standard to meet the challenges and threats involved.Just after flowering, the ideal conditions for Growing Grapes:The land chosen should be protected, because they need to look at some things that you will be a rewarding experience.

#Bq Grape Plant Best Useful Tips #Two Wire Grape Trellis

0 notes

meditativeyoga · 5 years ago

Text

Celebrate without reason

Have you ever believed concerning why, throughout the globe, in every society, in every society, there are a couple of days in the year reserved for celebration?

These couple of days for event are just compensation-- because these societies have actually taken away all celebration out of your life. And also if nothing is provided to you in settlement, your life can come to be a danger to the culture.

Don't get fooled by society

Every society needs to offer some settlement to you to ensure that you do not really feel completely lost in anguish, in unhappiness. These payments are false.

These firecrackers and also lights outside can not make you express joy. They are only for kids, for you they are simply an annoyance. In your inner world there could be a continuity of lights, songs, joys.

Always keep in mind that society compensates you when it really feels that the quelched could explode right into an unsafe circumstance if it is not compensated. The society discovers some means of permitting you to let out the quelched. This is not true event, as well as it could not be true.

Think beyond the calendar

True event should come from your life, in your life. And true event can not be inning accordance with the calendar, that on the initial of November you will certainly celebrate. Strange, the entire year you are miserable and also on the first of November unexpectedly you come out of misery, dancing.

Either your torment is false, or the first of November is incorrect, both can not be real. And also as soon as the initial of November is gone, you are back in your dark hole. everyone in his suffering, everyone in his anxiety.

Life need to be a continuous party, a celebration of lights the entire year round. Just after that you could mature, you could blossom.

Celebrate like the Japanese

Transform tiny points into a party. For example, in Japan they have the tea event. In every Zen monastery as well as in every person's home who can manage it, they have a tiny temple for alcohol consumption tea. Currently, tea is not a normal, profane thing, they have actually changed it into a celebration.

The temple for alcohol consumption tea is made in a specific way-- in a beautiful garden with a beautiful pond, swans in the pond, blossoms throughout ... visitors come as well as they have to leave their footwears outside. It is a temple.

And as you get in the holy place, you can not speak, you have to leave your thinking and also thoughts and speech outside with your footwears. You take a seat in a meditative pose. As well as the host, the girl who prepares tea for you-- her movements are so graceful, as if she is dancing, removaling around preparing tea, putting cups and also dishes before you as if you are Gods. With such respect ... she will certainly bow down, and also you will certainly obtain it with the very same respect.

The tea is prepared in a special samovar, makings beautiful noises, a music of its very own. And also it belongs to the tea event that everybody need to listen very first to the music of the tea. So everybody is quiet, paying attention ... birds tweeting outside in the yard, and also the samovar ... the tea is creating its own track. A peace surrounds ...

When the tea prepares and also it is put into everyone's cup, you are not simply to drink it the means people are doing almost everywhere. You will smell the aroma of the tea. After that, you will certainly sip the tea as if it has come from the past, you will certainly take some time-- there is no hurry.

Somebody could begin playing on the groove or on the sitar. An ordinary thing-- tea-- as well as they have made it a lovely spiritual celebration, and also everybody comes out of it nurtured, fresh, feeling more youthful, really feeling juicier. As well as exactly what could be done with tea can be done with everything-- with your clothes, with your food.

Celebrate anything ... everything

People are living virtually in sleep, or else, every textile, every towel has its very own appeal, its very own feeling. If you are delicate, after that the garments is not simply to cover your body, after that it is something revealing your uniqueness, something revealing your preference, your society, your being.

Everything you do should be meaningful of you, it must have your trademark on it. Life comes to be a constant celebration.

Even if you drop sick and you are lying in bed, you will certainly make those moments of existing in bed moments of elegance and pleasure, minutes of relaxation and also rest, minutes of reflection, minutes of listening to music or to poetry.

There is no demand to be depressing that you are ill. You need to more than happy that everyone remains in the office as well as you are in your bed like a king, relaxing-- somebody is preparing tea for you, the samovar is singing a tune, a good friend has used to find and also play flute for you ... These things are more vital than any medicine. When you are sick, call a physician. Much more vital, call those who love you since there is no medicine a lot more important compared to love.

Call those that can develop beauty, music, poetry around you since there is absolutely nothing that recovers like a mood of celebration.

Medicine is the least expensive kind of therapy. It appears we have actually neglected whatever, so we have to depend on medication and be irritated as well as unfortunate-- as if you are missing out on some fantastic pleasure that you were having in the workplace! In the workplace you were miserable.just someday off, and also you hold on to misery too, you will not allow it go.

Make everything innovative, make the best from the most awful-- that's exactly what I call 'the art'. As well as if a man has lived his whole life making every moment and also every stage of it a beauty, a love, a pleasure, naturally his fatality is mosting likely to be the utmost height of his whole life's endeavour. The last touches ... his death is not mosting likely to be ugly as it generally occurs daily to everyone.

#asana #spiritual #Yoga

0 notes

aerialsquid · 8 years ago

Text

A wild fanfic appeared!

Title: [TBD if any] Pairing: Harvey Dent/Oswald Cobblepot Fandom: Batman, using @harveydont/ @drdickmd and @hermannco‘s versions of the characters Other Tags: Post-coitus Snuggling, Asexual Character, Asexual/Non-Asexual Pairing, No Sex Onscreen NOTE: Asexuals negotiating relationships with non-asexuals is one of my hot jams, and I also love everything @harveydont puts out on any ship possible. I have no idea if I got any of this character wise but here we go.

—————–

“So you got us off.”

“Mhm.”

“Twice.”

“Mhm.”

“In a quite satisfactory way, obviously.”

“Of course.”

“And it’s hard to fake a smirk that smug, so clearly you’re enjoying yourself here.”

“Most certainly.”

“So you want to tell us why after all that you don’t even have your shirt off?”

“I’ll change into my nightclothes eventually, I’m not some animal.”

They were lounging against the overly ample comforter on Oswald’s bed, sharing a cigarette. There was a warm intimacy that came with passing it back and forth, the brief touch and withdrawal of fingertips before you set your lips to the place where your partner’s had just been. Oswald would call it erotic if he cared for that kind of thing.

Harvey had the scarred half of his face pressed to Oswald’s shoulder. As Oswald handed the cigarette back he turned away, tucking it between the right side of his mouth to take in a breath.

As Harvey smoked, Oswald idly surveyed his recently conquered tract of land. He’d left a few marks of his own over the course of the last hour, dark bruises against the scars and bright against the clean skin. Oswald liked the idea of them hiding under Harvey’s suit the next morning and made a note to ‘accidentally’ rub against the scratches when they went out to give him a fond reminder of the previous night.

The current state of Harvey’s two-toned suit was in a crumpled mess at the foot of the bed. His tie, the one that managed to be perfectly bisected once tied despite the laws of physics saying that the knot couldn’t be that neat without being a clip-on, was dangling from the lamp.

Oswald, meanwhile, had neatly hung up his jacket on the way into the bedroom, shucked off his shoes and not bothered to attend to any of the rest.

“You sure you don’t want us to return the favor?” asked Harvey. Light plumes of smoke flowed from his lips and through the gap in his cheek.

“No.”

“It just doesn’t seem…” Harvey lingered over the phrasing. His tongue ran over his teeth. “Fair,” he finished.

“Ah. Yes, fair.”

Everything was about fairness with Harvey, wasn’t it? First the fairness of the law, and then the fairness of the coin. Oswald wouldn’t be surprised if he flipped these days for what position he took in bed.

He shook his head lightly. “It wouldn’t be a favor. And don’t take it personally, it wouldn’t be a favor off anyone else either. I simply enjoy your company.”

“Like the company you get from those women I used to see hanging off your arm at every party we went to?”

“A man in my position is expected to have an accompaniment to those events. They were accessories, not partners, and they were handsomely compensated for the privilege of being such.” Well. There had been one or two that had become more than accessories, but they lay under a pile of bad memories and fractured hearts that Oswald had no desire to bring into this comfortable bed. He let his fingers trace the ridge of a scar on Harvey’s thigh. “Of course now I have much more pleasant company that doesn’t present me with a bill afterward and then clock out for the night.”

“All right, but that one time we sucked your dick in the bathroom at the gala for…some shit or other. Something art-related. What got you on board with that?”

Oswald took the cigarette back with an air of scalded dignity. “For one thing, the sustained pressure of far too many martinis on both sides of the situation. I would say 75% martinis, at the very least.” He drew in a long breath of soothing tobacco. Hadn’t they agreed they weren’t going to talk about that little encounter afterward? Rude, Harvey.

“Mmm, that still leaves 25% on the table. You’re a greedy bastard, Mr. Cobblepot. Wouldn’t expect you to leave that much just lying around.” His arm tightened around Oswald, an adoring indication of the fact that he was just as greedy.

Oswald rolled his fingers. “You really want to know?” He tightened his fingers around the edges of the cigarette.

“Wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t.”

Oswald stroked the hair on the unscarred half of Harvey’s head. “It was 20% for the optics of the situation.”

“The…optics.” Harvey raised an eyebrow at him.

Oswald smirked. “You were still DA, and you spent a large chunk of your career screwing me over. I got a measure of satisfaction from getting to do it to you in return, however metaphorically.”

Harvey let out a barking, harsh laugh. “Now that’s fair enough.”

“And what about you? I very much doubt you were left desperate with lust at my Adonis-like properties.” At the time they’d been desperate to maintain their balance long enough to walk to the bathroom. After he’d sobered up Oswald had taken shameful solace in the fact that Harvey, in his stupor, at least hadn’t been so uncoordinated that he’d bitten the entire matter right off.”

“80% martinis,” Harvey asserted. “At least 80%.”

“All right, and the 20%?” Oswald let out a loud squawk as Harvey abruptly pinched his stomach, making him jerk half an inch off the bed. His arm lashed out and sunk its nails onto Harvey’s thigh as penance. Harvey let out a strangled groan of mixed pleasure and annoyance before his voice mellowed out into a chuckle at Oswald’s offended expression.

“Because we wanted to see if you’d make that noise when you came.”

“Really? That was it? What were you, twelve?” Oswald glared at him. Harvey continued to refuse to take responsibility for the situation.

“No, just drunk. A lot of stupid shit seems like a hilarious idea when you’re drunk.”

Oswald huffed and flopped back onto the bed. “Well?” he said after a grumpy pause. “Did I?”

“Nope. Just a hard grunt, and then you patted our head like we were a good little dog. Bit anticlimactic, really.”

“Good.” Oswald patted Harvey’s head like he was a good little dog. Harvey shifted to put his head back down on Oswald’s ample chest.

“So let’s get back to my previous question,” he said, with that asshole lawyerly persistence that had driven Oswald into rages in their younger years. “What are you getting out of this if you’re not into it?”

“I never said I wasn’t ‘into it’. I said you didn’t need to return any favors.”

“You know we’d be fine without it. We got hands. Could even hire a hooker if we got desperate.”

“I want what I want, if I had a problem with it you’d be sleeping on the couch.”

Oswald extracted himself from Harvey’s arms to sullenly stab the cigarette into the ashtray on his night table. The ashtray was sculpted to look like a bird’s nest, naturally, and naturally Harvey had mocked it when they’d first rolled into the room in a whirlwind of kisses and wandering hands. (It wasn’t a crime to be thematic, Mr. ‘Everything we own absolutely has to be bisected and our hiring practices are biased towards twins’.)

He lay back down. Harvey curled back around him again, huge and warm. The ridges across his torso made it easy to trace the lines of Harvey’s body in his mind, envisioning where colors shifted and curled across his skin.

“The…there’s this look on your face,” Oswald mumbled. “Faces, whatever. You look like you’re dying of thirst and I’m the only person who can give you a drink, like I’m the most important thing in existence at that moment. You’re desperate for what I can give you, and you say my name like it’s an incantation to a god, and once you’ve finished you look like I’ve given you a glimpse of heaven. Even if I don’t particularly understand it, I can appreciate it, and it’s…not a look I get very often. And on you, I like it even more.” He sighed. “There, all right? I’m greedy, so sue me. You’d probably win anyway.”

Harvey rose up like a roused tiger, pressing his good hand to Oswald’s cheek. Yes, there was the look Oswald was talking about, though more sedate. That was an adoration that didn’t come out of idiocy, fear, or toadying. “We’re disbarred anyway. We’d lose by default.” His thumb ran across Oswald’s cheek.

Oswald smiled. “So let’s avoid the matter entirely and settle this out of court. It’ll be cheaper.”

“Settle it like men—by which we mean with our dicks.”

“Your dick, at least.”

Oswald rolled over to curl with his back to his partner. His soft, flat-palmed hand intertwined with Dent’s broad one. Maybe he could forgo the nightclothes and send the rest of the suit to the drycleaners in the morning; he’d completely lost the urge to do anything that involved getting out of bed.

“I can give you that look when I’ve dressed, too,” said a voice in his ear. So kind, when Harvey allowed himself to be. A coin’s toss away from mercy for far too many people who deserved far less. Oswald sometimes counted himself as one of them. “If you don’t want this.”

“I want what I want, Harvey. As long as we’re not in the middle of a meeting with Maroni you can give me that look as often as it pleases you.”

Harvey’s bisected lips pressed to the back of Oswald’s neck. Two kisses for the price of one, no coin flip needed. Oswald leaned back onto his muscular chest, a soft grin sweeping across his face.. “Just don’t make a mess on my good pants again.”

#harvey dent #oswald cobblepot #penguin #two-face #asexual character #squid writes fanfic #ozharv

37 notes · View notes

zenruption · 8 years ago

Text

My First Encounter With God

Add to Flipboard Magazine.

The following story was written in 1997 and was the foundational story behind History Yoghurt and the Moon. Of course, this story only represents a partial truth in what happened and the real event shaped the book as well.

Skater

By Jerry Mooney

It was Fall and I was in my early twenties. I had just graduated from college, but ironically I was more confused than ever. College had not provided me the meaningful insight I was seeking, let alone place me in a high-paying job. I was confused about my career, my love life, and just about everything. Pressing in my mind, however, and occupying the majority of my thoughts was my confusion about God.

Spiritually Lost

I didn’t even know what to call it: God, spirituality, religion. I say God now because I feel it works. That’s not to say that other names or descriptions don’t. But for now, I’ll use 'God'.

My confusion was nothing new. I had been seeking for a long time and finding nothing. It seemed the more I searched the more I merely muddied the water. But suddenly I was a college graduate. I felt like I should have more answers, more insight. After all, I had lived in Europe. I had traveled to eleven different countries. I spoke languages. I was a college graduate, damn it! I was no dummy. Yet I felt dumb as ever.

What did it all mean!? I would cry to myself. Why am I here!? I would complain. Can no one or nothing provide me some answers!? I begged.

Seemingly, I always received the same results: nothing. Damn nothing!

I went to theologians, missionaries, and priests. Did I receive answers? Yes. Did the answers quell my confusion or provide me with solace? NO! I hated hearing about faith. I needed proof. I was not about to base every direction and decision of my life on faith. Oh, I could have faith, if I had reason for faith. But I had no faith in the humans that were telling me to have faith. So how could I have faith in their God? How could I have faith in their God when I wasn’t convinced they had faith in their God? Plainly, I couldn’t. Their answers seemed too convenient, too controlling, and too divisive.

Persistent Search

I refused to give up, even though nobody seemed to be able to answer my questions with any real substance. Why should I get out of bed? Why should I continue living? Those were really the questions I wanted answers to. Whether God wore a robe or had 32 teeth or was Catholic or Muslim or played bingo or liked the Dallas Cowboys, those questions were irrelevant to me. I wanted to know why I existed and why I should continue. I didn’t care much for the idea that my life was a test, and upon completion, I would either fail to Hell or pass to Heaven. How transparent. How controlling. How undivine.

Oh, I cursed fate. I challenge God. I continued down an existentialist path. The only real meaning I could find in life was finding meaning in life. It wasn’t always easy.

At this time, I took a job teaching speech and debate at a small private college near where I graduated. At that same time, a freshman or first-year student as we called them, enrolled in a school where I was working. He wasn’t there by accident. I saw him compete in high school and I was very impressed. I recruited him very actively and sold him on the idea of coming to a school that would embrace his eccentricity as well as brilliance. He was an unconventional student and felt that I would be accepting of his unconventional ways. He was right about that but what I didn’t realize at the time was that, although he came to me to learn, ultimately, it was I who would become the student.

The Teacher Appears

His name was John, but we called him Skater because he skateboarded everywhere he went. He felt the name suited him and he embraced it. He dressed in large pants, belligerent T-shirts and sported long hair to boot. He never wore a tie, even at the tournaments, where ties were expected. He looked like a skater, not a debater. His only means for compensating for his unconventional appearance was his outstanding research ethic and his absolute brilliance. In an hour and a half, he could dissolve a judge's prejudices as well as convince the judge that he was ultimately right. For these reasons, I found him very compelling.

He earned the largest scholarship awarded at that school up to that point. He was successful in most regions of the country, but, despite that, he remained unaccepted within the community and especially by our director of forensics.

The Trip

One Saturday in October, Skater and I headed for the coast. We both needed a break from our worlds. We quietly ate a large breakfast in Seaside, Oregon and then walked to the beach. After a while of pensively and quietly roaming the coast and inspecting its treasures, we sat together on a large rock and stared at the magnificent ocean.

The large swells of water banged against the sand. Sometimes snuggling up to it, other times raising a violent fist, then smashing the shore. The gulls scavenged the beach while avoiding the shrieking children. The rhythmic crashing of the waves soothed the both of us. The children and the birds provided background music to the metronome of the great Pacific.

After a while, I felt like the environment hypnotized me. I was peaceful for the first time I could remember. I turned towards Skater and asked, 'Do you believe in God?'

He smiled and answered knowingly, 'No… I know in God.'

I sensed no conceit or doubt in his voice or expression. He said nothing else.

I spent a few moments explaining my long search and how sincerely I had looked for answers and how the search for meaning had consumed my life.

He listened very intently and smiled. He nodded a few times but didn’t volunteer any response.

As I looked out into the ocean, I began to think about Heaven and Hell. Thinking aloud I asked, 'Do you think maybe the ocean is Heaven? I mean think about it, you play all day. You eat. Your world is a playground and a restaurant. I especially think it's Heaven for dolphins. I mean, they don’t have any real enemies. They are faster and tougher than sharks, but they just play and laugh and eat. What a life. I even read that dolphins used to have phalanges. I mean with opposable thumbs, but they were smart enough to get rid of them.' Continuing as if I were really smart I said, 'You see, if you have a thumb, then you can use a hammer, then you can build a house, then you can build civilizations with taxes and mortgages and student loans. You know the dolphins were smart, leaving all that stuff alone. Yep, now they just eat, and play and laugh. That’s Heaven!'

Proof

Skater just continued to nod and smile.

So I asked further, 'You know in God, huh? What does that mean?'

He looked at me, scanned my body for worth. He squinted a little and looked into my eyes. He started to talk softly. He said, 'Can you see that bird flying?' I nodded yes. 'Can you see that same bird flying in the reflection of that puddle there in the sand?' I looked and nodded yes again. 'Can you see them both at the same time?' Again I nodded trying to follow him. 'Beautiful isn’t it?' I nodded more, this time more adamantly, raising my eyebrows to show my enthusiasm. 'Do you hear the ocean?' I continued to nod and resisted the urge to interrupt him. 'Do you hear the birds? Do you hear the children playing? Do you hear all of that, while you see the ocean and the birds and the children and the reflections of all that as well? Can you see the colors of the horizon? Can you feel the breeze on your skin? Can you smell the air?'

I finally said, ' Yah, I sense all of those things but…'

He interrupted, 'But, nothing. People want proof of God. They have proof. The problem isn’t that we lack proof. The problem is that people see the proof through the wrong eyes and hear the proof with the wrong ears and taste the proof with the wrong mouth and feel the proof with the wrong skin and we smell the proof with the wrong nose.'

In order for proof to register to us, we need lighting bolts and a thundering voice scaring the Hell out of us. What we fail to accept is that we have lightning bolts and thunder and yes they are proving the existence of God. We haven’t stepped far enough away from the idea that God created the universe for us. We are too anthropocentric (human centered or obsessed).

God Is Art

Because of that, we can’t see our part in the universe.' He paused. He adjusted his seating. He gestured to the ocean. He breathed the air joyfully. He sat contently and smiled a large and sincere smile. He continued, 'This universe here is an art project. You see, it’s about art and aesthetics. Not judgments and contempt. We’re not looking at the universe with the appreciation of art. It’s the same damn mental block that causes all those crazies to get all bent about art, about human art. You know how pissed off you get when people start talking about censorship? You know how fired up you get about how devoid of art our modern world is? It’s the same lack of ability to see art, the same blindness to art that blinds us to God. I thought you could see it. You love art. You appreciate the aesthetics our world. Now just apply that same filter to your eyes when you are searching for answers.

God is a great artist. I mean look at the environment around you. It’s awesome. We don’t associate that with God because for so many years, God has meant fear and control and Hell. Even those who don’t buy all that are still blinded by it. They don’t ingest the crap, but they still fail to see. We just don’t see the intrinsic value in expression and beauty. Everything is about acquisition and accumulation to most. That blinds us to the subtle, esoteric evidence of our Creator. Who would cower to a god who was just sculpting? No vengeance. No wrath. God’s just making some beauty.'

I was very impressed by this thoughtful diatribe, but something in me had to protest at first. I interjected, 'So how does that provide meaning to life? Why should I get up every morning? Why do I exist?'

The Meaning

Undaunted by this most salient chain of questions, he answered confidently and reassuringly, 'That is the meaning in life. Your life, like the universe, is an art project. It is as significant as anything in the universe. Make it beautiful! That’s why you get out of bed. The same reason the whole damn universe exists, to express itself, and be beautiful.'

With a zapped look I replied, 'Huh?'

He paused and pensively looked at the horizon as if to organize his words. He continued cautiously. There are two purposes of existence: The first purpose is to appreciate the sculpture. What I mean by that is this; The Creator of this universe has been creating this universe for a very long time. It is very beautiful, I mean to the atom.

The galaxies are amazing, the supernovas, the trees, the reflections, the refracted light, the rock formations the girls with bows in their hair, wing-tipped shoes, music, sounds, breezes, wit, humor, zebras and koalas and polar bears and baby humans and lady bugs. I could go on. It’s amazing! Be amazed! God created a damn beautiful universe. Revel in it! Rejoice! Suck it in! Feel it! Hear it! Taste it! That’s the first purpose. The second purpose is to help. I mean, be art! Don’t just be artistic. Be art! Your existence, like the supernovas and galaxies and zebras and refracted light, is an art project. Be beautiful! Be funny! Be aesthetic! Create, with your life, good art.'

Simple But Not Easy

'That’s it? Be art?' I scoffed incredulously.

'That’s it.' He replied gently. 'You know how much you love art. You know how much you appreciate Michelangelo as well as Michael Jordan. Those people took their lives and created beauty. It gave meaning to your life as well as theirs. Don’t fight it. The world is full of beauty, regardless of everyone trying to ugly it up. Take it in and then provide your contribution to it.'

He motioned out to the horizon with his hand. He put his hand to his ear, listening to the waves and the gulls and the children. He breathed satisfied. He said nothing more.

The Conversion

I sat there. His words slowly seeped into my body. The sound of the ocean reinforced his words. It was as if the ocean were confirming Skater’s words. Slowly, my senses relented. I succumbed to the idea that the world was in fact beautiful. I could find enough purpose in that to continue existing. My body was overtaken by an overwhelming joy. I was so happy I could laugh and cry at the same time. I shivered and smiled and laughed and jumped and screamed with excitement. Skater had uncovered the meaning of life, and he let me look at it too. This was the most meaningful day of my life, and it has permeated every other day of my life since.

On the drive home, he looked at me as if he wanted to say something. I looked at him with the most radiant smile I could manage. He said, 'You’ve got it. You are one of the few. But you’ll lose it too. Remember I said this when you lose it. It will help you get it back.' I smiled and continued to drive. He finally said, 'Don’t forget your sense of humor. It’s part of the reality of the universe. When you do, that’s when you get in trouble.'

Humor

I smiled and asked, 'What’s the difference between a rolling stone and a Scotsman?' He shrugged. I continued, 'A Rolling Stone says, ‘Hey! You! Get off of my cloud!’ a Scotsman says, ‘Hey Mcloud, get off of my ewe!’'

We laughed and Skater finally replied, 'Do you see how many things had to happen for that joke. Isn’t it amazing?' I smiled, nodded and drove us home.

medianet_width = "728"; medianet_height = "90"; medianet_crid = "728762653"; medianet_versionId = "111299"; (function() { var isSSL = 'https:' == document.location.protocol; var mnSrc = (isSSL ? 'https:' : 'http:') + '//contextual.media.net/nmedianet.js?cid=8CUTI81HQ' + (isSSL ? '&https=1' : ''); document.write('<scr' + 'ipt type="text/javascript" id="mNSC" src="' + mnSrc + '">'); })();

#God #spirituality

1 note · View note

acolove · 9 years ago

Text

A Trip To The Unknown

Chapter One: Glad the train introduced us

It would be a long night. After spending 2 hours in a cab to get to this train station, there would be more 18 hours on the train itself. That’s absurd. I have never ever heard of a trip so long., especially by train. But it has to be done. Why did my family have to live so far away? Well, actually, I moved out. But it doesn’t change the fact that we live so apart from each other.

Is has been 3 years since I last saw my family. I remember how my father told me to never return, to leave them and never look back. I guess he won’t be very happy in seeing me. I’m the younger daughter of a broken man. My mom died when I was little, so it was just me, father, Nesta and Elain. My sisters were really close, a true family. Maybe it was because of the age difference, but their little family never included me.

Now, I’m going back to that house empty of love and solidarity, and without any warning. I wasn’t planning a family gathering, but the circumstances asked for it.

I found my seat by the window. If I were lucky, no one would sit next to me and I could spend the next hours sleeping or thinking about what would I say when I get home. Home. That house was not my home. I realized I had no such thing.

Apparently, I was not a lucky person. The person sitting next to me was the most handsome man I’ve ever seen. He was tall and had a muscled body, his hair was dark as the night, but his skin was brown and tan. His violet eyes were staring at me as he offered his hand to me.

”I’m Rhysand” He smiled at me.

I took his hand and offered a smile, so obviously fake. “ I’m Feyre”

He took his seat next to me as I turned to the window, watching as people passed through the gates and into the train. I couldn’t stop thinking about everything that happened and how much of it I could blame on myself. Maybe everything.

I heard the man next to me clearing his throat “ So, what makes you travel all the way to Prythian?”

“Reasons” I didn’t even bothered looking at him.

“That’s quite vague”

“That’s quite none of your business”

After my response, he seemed to understand that I was not looking for small talk, or any talk at all. I fell asleep the second the train begun to move. Only 18 hours to go. I can do this.

I woke up with someone gently shaking me, but with all the bruises on my body it hurt and I groaned at the touch. Rhysand, apparently, pulled away at the sound.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you” He looked sincere, but it made nothing to improve my humor “I just wanted to say that they’re serving food right now. Some sort of dinner, if you find this eatable”

I murmured thanks while waiting for an attendant to bring me some soup, or whatever it was.

Rhysand was looking at me while I tasted my soup. It wasn’t all that bad. “I didn’t know they served food here”

“It’s to make the costumers more comfortable. After all, it’s a long trip”

“Indeed” I guess they weren’t so preoccupied with the costumers comfort judging by the side of the bowl. It was enough to feed a little bird, but not me.

“They also put together who they think will be the most compatible” he was now smirking.

“Really?” I looked up at him

“Yes, and since they were right about the soup, maybe they’re right about us”

“So you’re telling me that this is not just a train, but a love train?”

“Yes it is, Feyre darling” His smile only grew “And I intend on asking you out on a date by the end of this little lobe journey”

“I don’t think this will happen, Rhysand” I was smiling now.

“Rhys”

“What?” I looked confused at him

“Call me Rhys” He explained, “That’s how my friends call me”

“Okay, Rhys” I saw something shining in his eyes for just a moment because of the use of his nickname. “But I must warn you: friends don’t go on dates together”

“Maybe I want us to be more than friends”

“So I guess I will just have to call you something different. Maybe prick”

I heard his laugh as I looked back to my soup and finished eating it. When I turned to the window, I only saw trees passing by in a blur. Maybe sitting next to Rhys was my share of luck.

Rhysand and I talked for the next 3 hours about all the possible light subjects. I told him I was taking an arts course but I was also taking a break to visit family. I didn’t told what was the real reason, or who was the real reason. He told me he just graduated on business and was returning to his hometown to take care of his family company. We were from neighboring towns but never met.

I told him all about my family: how my father was never the same after my mother died, how Nesta was the most difficult person I know, how Elain is the exception to our family, how she is kind and naïve. He told me his parents died when he was little and their company was taken care by his uncle, but now he was read to lead. He told me about his friends ate the city, whom he called “The Inner Circle”, and how he missed them while he was away.

I tried not to look sad when he told me about them, but I’m sure Rhys noticed. I got jealous because I didn’t have anyone to miss. I was not close to my family, I was never the friendly kind of girl. Well, until I met him. Tamlin made me feel like no one ever did. He loved me so fiercely and I loved him back. Then we moved together to the other side of the country and I never talked to anyone again. Since now I was going back, it was safe to assume that it didn’t end well.

Think about him ruined my mood and I decided I should sleep some more. Rhysand understood and went to sleep too.

Only 8 hours left. I woke up again at the middle of the night. Rhysand was sleeping, just like everyone else on the train. Seeing him sleep brought me so many bad memories I couldn’t help crying. I thought about the hell I’ve been through and all the nights I’ve spent crying while Tamlin slept next to me as if nothing had happened.

I turned to the window again, and tried to be the most quiet as possible, Unfortunately, I was not capable of suppressing some sobs. After a few minutes, I felt someone holding my hand. It only made me cry harder.

He didn’t ask me what was wrong, which only made it worse. I decided I would tell him the truth, I would tell him everything. I don’t know if it was the fact that I was never going to see him again, or if it was just him, but it felt easy to tell my story. And I felt lighter.

“His name is Tamlin. We met in high school and he was my first love. I’ve never felt so beautiful, or desired, or loved as I felt when he looked at me. So it was easy loving him. We dated for a year and it was perfect, he was perfect. But then we graduated and he was moving to somewhere so far away and I was afraid no one would ever look at me like that again. So when he asked me to live with him I said yes, never hesitated. My father told me to never come back, to make a living far away from them. And so I did.”

I would stop eventually to drink some water or look at Rhys for a response, but he was serious, and his face didn’t give anything away.

“Everything was so perfect at the beginning. I thought I was dreaming. But after a year, he started to change. He became so jealous and possessive, never letting me meet the few friends I made, to a point that I had no friends at all. He was getting aggressive when I confronted him. That’s when he started hitting me” I saw anger on Rhys’s eyes, but I didn’t stop. “He would punch me or kick me in places no one could see and I just got lost. I stopped caring, confronting, asking. I just did what he wanted. But it was never enough. So he would hit me and make me “compensate” him in the bedroom for all the discomfort I caused. To make sure I never left the house, he locked me in our room and he would leave me there all day long. I couldn’t call my family because I chose to leave them. I chose this life”

I stopped for a moment, looking to anywhere but Rhys. I couldn’t meet his gaze, not after admitting I knew it was my fault. God, I felt so pathetic.

“It lasted a year. Until- well, until today. There was this party at this amazing gallery, and the owner and a lot of artists would be there. It was a great opportunity to make contacts or maybe even get a shot at an exposition. But he had a football game and wouldn’t let me go without him. I guess I just wanted it so bad I thought it was worth fighting for. I’ve never seen him so angry.” I took off my scarf so he could see the marks on my neck, probably deep purple by now. His eyes widened at the sight. “He tried to kill me, so I stabbed him. I don’t know how the knife got in my hands and I don’t know how I managed to escape, but I did. I grabbed a few things and took a cab for that train station and just bought a ticket to the only place I could think of. And I don’t know how I will face my family after that, because worse than being with someone like him is accepting it. And I did”

After what appeared to be hours in silence, I looked up at Rhys and saw only kind and understanding. He grabbed my hand and squeezed it. I realized how tired I was after telling all this and leaned onto Rhysand, falling asleep right after, with my head pressed against his chest and his arm over my shoulder.

He was stroking my hair while we told each other the worst jokes we could remember. We’ve been like that for the past hour. He didn’t say anything about what I told him and I was glad. I didn’t want to hear his judgment, or worse: his pity. It was easy to just talk about nothing, but never stop talking. We shared headphones listening to his ipod. Our tastes were so different, but I liked what he introduced me to.

It was morning already and we were just 2 hours from our destination. We ate some fruit salad they gave us and we just spent the rest of the trip like that.

I was waiting for a cab with my bag hung on one of my shoulders when Rhys told me his car arrived. He offered me a ride but a just needed a time alone.

“I want you to know that it was not your fault, it could never be your fault. I think you’re very beautiful and very brave” His words didn’t surprised me as much as the kiss he placed on my cheek. His lips were soft and warm and I wished he had kissed me for a longer time. He pulled away and got into his car, not after waving ate me by the window.

My cab came few moments later and I got myself comfortable on the back seat. Now, I was certain having Rhysand sitting next to me was a luck sign.

#acomaf #acotar #feyre #rhysand #feysand #fanfic

5 notes · View notes

survivingart · 6 years ago

Text

IS THIS ART?

Countless figures throughout history have tried to explain this incredibly complex question: What is art? And more importantly, what isn’t art?

But still the institutions have no real answer, no common ground upon which they could define a normative of what defines art. Brut art is a problem, so are other outsider artists, and home schooled creatives that defy or just never become part of the institutional system.

It’s the carpenters that put more than the usual love and attention to detail in building their “consumer objects”. It’s the iPhones and iPads and other designer products that always walk the thin line between art and function.

Then you have others that do not agree with the institutional idea that one needs to even be part of the system to be considered an artist. You only need to have ideas and communicate them with the world via your production.

And in the philosophy of aesthetics — the field that studies this question ontologically — there is even more confusion. A materialist philosopher that believes all reality is only material and no immaterial reality can ever exist, will tell you art is pure matter, pure reciprocity between the object and its perceiver.

But they might also say that art doesn’t even need spectators to exist — like the whole status of art is somehow imbued inside the object that it is representing. Almost comically, some believe art is a magical aura (but of course physical, never metaphysical or non-material) that lives in an object, a special part — almost like an extra organ of the body of that object — that pumps pure artistic energy through it and makes us instantly experience art, if we indeed are knowledgable and receptive enough to perceive it.

But it’s all a load of incoherent and over-theorised bull if you ask me.

For me, all of this began with Descartes, when he decided to divide reality into two connected but distinct realities: the material and immaterial world.

There are even jokes about how the common person in the street is always a cartesian — a follower of Descartes — even if they themselves don’t know it; all average people believe in a body and in a soul as two distinct entities.

Now, I won’t go into the fallacies of such beliefs too much as this is an art channel not a philosophy discussion, but just to give a bit of context, I’d like to present three interesting and extremely precise arguments for the contrary — that art is not an object, but an experience.

Because if art is an experience, we surely can come to understand that truly it is impossible to create a functional theory, a list of checkboxes that anything considered art has to tick to really become art, or even fine art.

The first is by Thomas Nagel, the author of the story titled What It Is Like To Be A Bat, who posed an interesting proposition:

While humans can understand and imagine the behaviours of creatures, in this case a bat; merely being able to imagine how it would feel to be able to fly, navigate by sonar, hang upside down and eat insects, would never really be the same as a bat’s perspective.

Nagel claims that even if we were able to gradually turn into bats (think Kafka, but more uplifting), our brains would not have been wired as a bat’s from birth; therefore, we would only be able to experience the life and behaviours of a bat, rather than their mindset.

To behave as something isn’t equal to being something, regardless of how much it looks, swims and quacks like a duck, the shocker is, it might just be a rubber ducky.

And this goes for our language and communication problem too; I could paint a picture of an apple being picked by a woman somewhere in a forest. Some would see a nice lady picking apples, others would see the highly complex concept of Ancestral Sin. Same painting, same communication, immensely different results.

The next story, written by Frank Jackson is also about a woman who’s life is changed because of an apple — not because of eating it but merely by looking at it! Titled What Mary Didn’t Know, it describes a very curious lady who loved natural sciences — the field of colour theory especially.

She knew everything there was to know about colours; their wavelengths, the numerous psychological effects colours have on us, the various types of receptors that are utilised in our bodies to see them … just about everything. But she had one issue. She had been educated about all of this in a black-and-white room.

Black-and-white books, TV screens, and furniture — for some weird reason even Mary herself is black-and-white, but it is a story and if it was OK for Little Red Riding Hood to be red, I guess Mary can be colourless too.

So Jackson argued: Even though Mary had all the same information about colours that we do, she had never really experienced them and was therefore missing one crucial piece of information; one important bit of quaila, as philosophers like to call these magical bits of subjective experience, namely actually seeing red.

Jackson proposed that when Mary stepped out of her room and saw a red, juicy apple, she not only saw colour for the first time, she in fact learned something new. Something that she couldn’t have learned through any text book or black-and-white YouTube video.

She gained a new emotional and preceptorial experience — seeing red. (Remember all those people who told us that we can’t learn everything from books, well they were right in a way!)

And the last, and my personal favourite story curiously also evolves around red (philosophers love it for some reason). One of the greatest minds of the 21st century, John Searle wrote a wonderful tale about a talking room.

Titled The Chinese Room, this wonderful tale of speaking Asian walls stirred the lines of cognitive scientists when first presented in 1980. It describes a room, where one would input a piece of written-down information — be it a question, a statement or just a remark about the weather — and the room, after a period of time, would answer back. All in Chinese for some weird reason, probably because Searle himself said he’s awful at speaking Mandarin (The man speaks more than 6 languages fluently though!).

Well, the room wasn’t some magical artefact from a forgotten time, it was operated by one person. And the interesting fact was, that parson had no idea how to speak or write Mandarin. What he did have though was an assortment of instructions and guidelines on what to do and a giant library of cards with Chinese signs, decorating the walls of the room.

Whenever text was slid through the opening in the main wall, he would open the instruction books at the appropriate page depicting the combination of symbols (he was obviously really efficient at what he did and compensated generously for his job, probably owned a villa and a few Ferraris too).

After locating the right page in the manual, he would then find the appropriate cards on the shelves of the room, align them in the order depicted in the instructions and return the answer back though the slit in the wall. And the person on the outside would be absolutely amazed of how wonderful a computer this contraption was!

But the point of Searle’s work wasn’t to explain away computers by using miniature librarians living in our processors and memory units, he wanted to point out a simple yet profound truth about communication, computation and the mind. One that we have heard twice before, albeit in different iterations and with slightly different points.

Syntax (that is the assortment of signals; be it voice signals, written words or electric currents going to the processors of our computers) does not equal semantics (that is the name we give to meaning; the meaning of a word, a picture, a sign … anything that has some symbolical value to anyone).

The only true way to experience art is to, well, experience it. It’s impossible to not experience something if we wish to even try to comprehend it, let alone understand fully what it is about.

It’s like dreaming about something you have never experienced — I know, dreams almost never look like reality, but to be honest, our dreams don’t just appear as a beam of light from god or some bored alien on Mars that decided to give us a transcendental experience because we’re the chosen one to guide human kind into onto the next level of existence.

It’s all just pieced together by everything we experience during our waking days. Every bit of information was consciously or unconsciously experienced and internalised. It’s the same with art.

You need to be present, you are indeed the key to the question of: What art is? Without anyone to view the Mona Lisa, there is no art, just a peculiar object.

Because to know what art is, we also need to know what art isn’t.

But when does art stop to be? Or what if it never even become perceivable to us as art?

In the moment where there are no more men, no more women, and no more children.

And what happens to art then?

It is, like all that is created from an ego, bound to its creator. When he perishes, so does the essence of all his children, leaving behind a heap of empty material shells. But the intricate architectural dams of beavers, the beautiful patterns of various animals and the chirping and poems of all the beautifully performing singing birds. These don’t perish.

Even if there is no man to hear the song, see the pattern and enjoy the complexity of animal life and their creations they still serve an immediate function.

If there is a female Nightingale around, the song is heard, if there are beavers, they will enjoy and understand the dams and the tigers will comprehend their intricate skin patterns — each species forming its own personal language.

And when they’re gone, so are all their features, all their creations.

And you know why?

Because even if today the thought of a non-sociocentric universe is impossible for most, some things in the world actually weren’t made by us. Neither to amuse or to teach. And because of that, they can last quite a bit longer than our concept of art ever will.

Art is an experience, not an object. But it isn’t only a material experience — and no, I’m not saying it’s magic that makes us live and die, because the last time I checked nobody wrote Emet on my head and magically made me a real boy the way the golem becomes alive in Jewish folklore.

But the point to take home is, the more you know, the more you understand about the world around you, the more things will give you the same experience of art, of the sublime.

Because while surely not any object can produce the same power of artistic pleasure — for me it’s a mid-late Rothko painting, for you it might be a conceptual piece with hay and neon or a realistic portrait of Loui XV or just a nice handmade drawing of your child about how much they love you.

The object is only as important as our understanding of it. That’s why learning is paramount. To be a good artist, and even a good spectator we need to constantly expand our horizons. Because the day we stop learning is the day we create a canon in our life.

And as with every determinate belief that only so and so is an artist and the others are imposters, we inevitably become blind to the ineffable vastness of what art really is.

Art is everything. But to the inexperienced and blind, it is less than nothing, because even nothing takes something form us, whereas a foreign object to a closed mind doesn’t even register. It is like it never even existed.

So to truly experience reality — at least a much of it as we possibly can — we need to stay humble, open and childlike in our awe towards the world. If nothing else, we owe it to either God or our parents or ourselves or just to the lovely abyss that the nihilists of us enjoy staring down.

We owe it to whatever makes us stand-up in the morning to give everything the world has to offer a chance. Maybe we will find a new thing we like, but it’s much more likely we’ll discover a previously completely hidden part of reality that was really just hiding in plain sight.

What is art then?

Everything for those of us that aren’t afraid to look.

from Surviving Art http://bit.ly/2WJW4tG via IFTTT

#artist life #contemporary art #surviving art #make art everyday #blog

0 notes

elijahbowlingtv · 8 years ago

Text

BTS / / CREATED FOR WORSHIP - SHORT FILM / / March 23, 2017

youtube

BTS / / CREATED FOR WORSHIP - SHORT FILM / / March 23, 2017

In spring of 2017, I got to produce my first ever Short Film, Created for Worship. This would be my first legitimate solo film, as all my previous projects were interviews, recaps, promos, etc. This is my first film as the lead Director, Producer, and Writer, and I built up a great sense of professionalism over the years which culminated with this film.

Heading into this film, it was serious business. I was confident, dialed in, and ready to take this film on like a pro. I was creating this film to enter into a competition – the Easter North Carolina Church of God Teen Talent Competition, Multi-Media Division, Presentation Video – so I carried myself with professionalism. I could confidently say I knew what I was doing, as all my previous experience was mainly educational. I put everything I knew into this film, and I’m blown away at the results. Let’s dive in.

CONCEPT //

“The concept of this film is inspired by Psalms 150, which is a culmination of why everything exists: to praise (or worship) the Lord. The beauty in creation - in all its senses - is just a reflection of its purpose. We're beautiful because God created us, and He created us to worship Him. My desire was to tell that message through the art of film, and create a cinematic worship experience.”

That’s the short version I included with my films presentation package. Now that you get the idea, let me dive a little deeper.

In the late summer of 2016, God lead me on a journey through the book of Psalms. I read 5 Psalms a day, every day until I finished. Throughout this journey, the Lord really impressed this theme of Worship on me. Throughout Psalms, you read about David’s heart for worship, and you can feel everything he writes. The literature alone is amazing. But throughout the book, I really began to grasp what God was showing me. One, that everything exists to worship Him. And two, that the reason we sense beauty in creation, it’s because what we’re sensing reflects its created purpose. Flowers are created to worship God, and their visual beauty reflects that. Flowers, aren’t Gods pinnacle of creation – WE are. So, if the soulless, created earth can bring forth its own praise/worship, then our worship as humans – Gods pinnacle of creation – is the natural desire of our souls. Our worship is that much more beautiful, because He wants to hear our worship more so than any other aspect of creation. Flowers use everything about them to worship God. Humans can do so much more than look beautiful, or smell beautiful. We have intellect, and a soul, which makes our worship intentional, and means so much more to God.

That changed my outlook on life, but God didn’t want me to just read it for myself. He wanted me to share it through exercising it. Specifically, He wanted me to share it through one of the greatest things He’s put in me; filmmaking. He confirmed it to me when I learned about this competition, and that it was my last eligible year to enter. I was mind-blown, and immediately got to work on pre-production. I was on a very tight schedule, as I started pre-production just 2-3 weeks before the competition.

LOCATIONS //

The first step was mapping out locations. I knew I wanted to be very nature-heavy, which made Lake Benson Park a perfect location. I had been on 3 film outings to Lake Benson before, so I knew it’d be perfect.

The next location was tricky. I wanted a large body of tall brush, that didn’t look completely dead. The solution I chose was perfect. A few years earlier, I was out driving around taking pictures of anything. I saw a large body of brush right outside a subdivision, and loved it. I snapped some images and used them for many different reasons, and I said to myself “this would be a cool location to film”. Needless to say, I remembered the place, but forgot its location. Thanks to Google Maps, tracking down the spot was easy.

CASTING //

Next, I needed a subject. What I had in mind was a seasoned worship leader with a genuine hear who could talk endlessly talk about worship and fully grasp/add-lib to the script, and was nice to look at. Luckily, I have a sister who fits this criterion perfectly.

GEAR //

Here’s all the gear I used (film and audio)

1X Canon Rebel T1i

1X Canon 18-55mm Stock Portrait Lens

1X Canon 55-250mm Stock Zoom Lens

1X Manfrotto MVH500A Fluid Drag Video Head

1X Manfrotto MVT502AM Tripod

1X Behringer XENYX 1202FX

1X Shure SM58

First, I’ll tackle video.

I shot the film using my Rebel T1i, and both of its stock lenses. I know it’s not the best quality, but I was also on a tiny budget. I had used it for all my projects at the time, and it’s served me well and got the job done.

I did budget towards a tripod – something I needed for years – specifically Manfrotto’s 502 Film Tripod. It was hands-down the best $300 I ever spent. It’s rock solid, and incredibly durable. Plus, the 500A Video head is flawless. I highly recommend this tripod for any filmmaker, especially DSLR Filmmakers.

Next, I’ll tackle audio.

My favorite audio solution in a corporate video setting is hands-down the Zoom H4N. It’s very common amongst most filmmakers, and a great device every filmmaker should have with them. I unfortunately didn’t own one at the time, nor did purchasing one fit my budget. My solution ended being crazy overkill, but worked perfectly.

I own a small Behringer mixer, which was my only option for good audio. This was a huge hassle, because I also had to tote a large power supply and interface (which meant another computer to record into) for it as well. However, being able to precisely control my levels was a huge plus.

For the mic, I just used a standard Shure SM58 Dynamic Mic placed beneath the subject out of frame. Not at all the best nor proper way to mic your subject, but certainly not the worst.

If you’re filming a corporate/interview style of film, I highly recommend purchasing the H4N and either a great quality lav mic or shotgun mic. It’s a much easier setup with similar, or even better results.

PRODUCTION //

Okay, now let’s get into production.

As I said before, I walked into this film pursuing excellence, as if it were a major motion picture, regardless of the gear I was using. Having the right mindset is both healthy and crucial for any project you take on. I wanted to do the best job possible.

We shot the film over 2 days - each being 2-3 hours.

Day 1 we shot all the A-Roll at Lake Benson. Again, I had plenty of experience in corporate video, and was all too familiar with Lake Benson. At the time, I never used lighting nor was I a lighting artist, so we were dependent on the sun. Setting up was a breeze, and after 2 great takes we called it a day. All I did was frame a widescreen portrait, with marginal headroom, shooting straight on to the talent. For audio, I simply placed the mic at knee level directed to the talents face, just outside of frame. If you’ve ever used dynamic mics, you’ll know they pick up every bit of sound, so next time I’ll take a more targeted approach for audio to avoid capturing so much background and ambient noise, and also having a solution for wind.

Day 2 we shot all the B-Roll and fills. Many of these were handheld shots, from a variety of angles. I wanted to get plenty of close-ups of the talents face, and her hands. The concept was capturing not only her beauty, but the beauty she was exploring and observing with nature and creation. I also captured many broad shots, giving the audience full contextual awareness of each scene, and creating an atmosphere that stimulates the audience, immersing them into an atmosphere of cinematic worship. As we were driving between locations, I filmed plenty of shots out the window I used later as fills.

One set of shots I fell in love with in particular are the lake shots, and the Manfrotto tripod played a huge roll in them. The flawless panorama shots were thanks to the fluid drag video head, along with the bird shots as well. These shots were amazing to film, and even more astonishing to view on screen.

Another aspect of production was the music. I’m a musician – playing drums, guitar, and piano – so I produced the music for this film in-house. This was the most tedious part of making the film, as I was taking it solo. I drew inspiration from a variety of sources, a major one being a piece of music used by Kari Jobe – my favorite artist in music. Once I had my melody, I began exploring patches and sounds to create my melody with. I wanted something soft, warm, and light, to match the visual atmosphere of the film. I narrowed it down to 9 sounds, and tracked each one individually in my studio. This process took a few hours, keeping me awake until 4:00am just 2 days before the competition. The following morning, I tracked the drums and percussion, and was ready for post.

POST PRODUCTION //

Going into edit, I knew I wanted to be very intentional with both the visuals and the music. The script was perfect, and the visual and musical elements had to reflect and compliment the script, without taking away the focus. Everything had to work in harmony, with perfect balance – something you’d assume to be tedious.

The first thing I did was mix the tracks for the music to create a final piece. I did this solely in Adobe Audition CC, and the hardest part was timing. I couldn’t track the sounds to a metronome, I had to track them to the pre-existing piece of music. And of course, the timing never perfectly lined up. Slightly noticeable, but not at all horrible by any stretch.

Once I had my music, I wrapped my content around it in Adobe Premiere Pro, and adjusted the audio accordingly. Next, I color graded the film using a complex combination of HSL levels, Exposure, RGB Curves, and more. I wanted a very warm tone to the film, which aside from concept, compensated for the film being shot in early spring and lacking the extent of natural warmth on set I was hoping for.

As far as visual effects go, there was one shot in particular that stands out – the reflected pano of the lake. I’ve seen this effect in so many films, and was eager to try it myself. It’s a simple effect to achieve. I took my pano shot of the lake, and cropped out the top half of the footage. I then took that footage and pinned it to the top of the frame, duplicated it, vertically flipped the duplicated footage, then aligned each half in the middle to complete the effect. Outside of that, I just used a variety of dips, fades, and speed adjustments of several shot. The scripture overlays and credits were crafted in Photoshop before being placed in the film using Premiere.

FINAL //

This film is a milestone accomplishment, and means the world to me. I loved making it and would definitely do it all again. The film won 1st place in its division at the State Competition, and is headed to Lee University for the International Church of God Teen Talent Competition on July 31st – August 5th. By the end of the competition, I had been awake for 39= hours straight (never even touched my bed), but it was so worth it on every level. God gets all the credit, and I’m so thankful for the gifts He’s given me. If you’re still here, thanks for reading! Hope this helps you out in anyway. Checkout the film on YouTube, and follow my social channels for more updates on films and videos to come. Thanks for watching, and hope you enjoy the film!

#Blog

0 notes