#I am so incredibly grateful to have you all reading my dumb-ass tags

[markscherz]

Holy shit you guys at some point we smashed our way past 20,000 frog lovers. Thank you all for following along!

[whatsnewalycat]

Just Dumb Enough to Try

Chapter 20: The Chicken

Word Count: 4k+

Pairing: Javier Peña x F!Reader

Rating: Explicit (18+ only)

Tags / CW: NO REAL HARM HAS BEEN DONE TO JUDY I PROMISE, swearing, cheating/infidelity, smoking, domestic abuse, crying, soft and fluffy javi, giving javi shit is my favorite past time, unprotected PIV sex, clitoral stimulation, jealousy, pregnancy test, pregnancy in general, what's in the fucking box, motherfucker is scheming

Chapter Summary: Our heroes have tunnel vision as they finally come to an agreement on an important decision.

Notes: Chapter title from "The Chicken" by Bo Burnham. Things are happeniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing with our main character and Javi, y'all. How exciting! And terrifying!! I'm gonna be sappy for a second here. This story almost has 100 kudos on AO3 and I almost have 100 followers here, which might not seem like a big deal, but it's very exciting to me. Because of mental health things and stuff, I didn't write for over a decade before I started this story. I honestly love it so much, and every day I'm grateful that any one single person that wants to read any one single thing I write. It's been incredible. So, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. I appreciate you more than you could know. And I can't wait to write more, even when this story is over (probably Pedro fics because I'm a sucker for his characters). Anywho. Back to our regularly scheduled programming!

[ Masterlist for Series ] [ Taglist ] [ Spotify Playlist ] [ AO3 ]

151 Fir St N, Laredo, TX July 27, 1998

“What’s wrong?” Javi answers when he picks up on the second ring.

Momentarily, you wonder how he knows something is wrong. Then you realize it’s not even 8 am on a Monday morning, which is an unusual time for you to call. Also, you haven’t talked to him since you both departed your house yesterday morning, despite his urging you to call when you got back from the airport. It really wasn’t intentional, though. When you returned, you were so overwhelmed by what you found, it sent you ass over teakettle mentally, until… well, until now.

“Gone,” your voice is warped and nasally when you respond, “My paintings, my movies, my art supplies. He got rid of it all. An- an- and- Fuck, Javi, Judy is gone.” your body shakes as you heave a deep breathe inward, exacerbating the aching in your chest. It summons a fresh well of hot tears, and you choke out, “She’s gone. It’s all gone. Who fucking does that?”

“You don’t know what he did with her, I assume?” his voice remains neutral and steady.

“No,” you squeak, inhale a shattered breath, then try to talk through your ugly crying, “I t-tried to talk to him, ask him what he did with her, but h-he looks right through me like I don’t even exist.”

Javi is silent on the other end. Probably occupied by the gears turning in his head as he tries to get a grasp on the situation.

You, on the other hand, have been stewing in the wake of Dan’s actions for almost 24 hours, and your thoughts on the matter are spilling out of your mouth with vitriol, “It’s a punishment. He took the only things I liked in this fucking hell hole, and he fucking knows it. He wants me to be miserable.”

Javier responds to your bitter assumptions with a softly spoken question, “What do you want to do?”

Not a demand. Not a decision made on your behalf. Just…

What do you want to do?

“I want to see you,” you whimper as his delicacy soothes the anger flaring within you, “I don’t want to be here.”

So he drops what he’s doing to come pick you up.

When he gets to your house, he finds you moping in a blanket burrito on the couch. Your eyes are red and puffy, staring at one of Judy’s toys on the floor. Wordlessly, he sinks into the couch and beckons you closer. The stagnant tears resume when you unwrap yourself and climb into his lap. He holds you tight, burying his nose in your hair as you work through this wave of grief. When your breath starts to settle, he murmurs, “You wanna get out of here?”

You sniffle and nod, then get up to get your purse.

—

“I’m going to be pretty busy today, but just help yourself to whatever you need, ok?” Javi informs you gently. You’re tangled together in his bed, lulled into a sense of security as you cuddle. The thump-thump that powers his body sounds beneath your ear, hypnotizing you as you write love notes on his belly. He’s playing with your hair and watching your fingers dance across him.

“Does Pickles have to work, too, or can he stay with me?” you murmur.

“He has to work,” he squeezes your shoulder sympathetically as he breaks the news, then resumes playing with your hair.

You blow a raspberry, “That’s ok. I’ll probably just take a nap. I couldn’t sleep last night. Maybe I’ll snoop through your room for a book or something.”

“Oh yeah?” he chuckles, smiling down at you.

“If that’s ok with you. Is there any area I need to avoid?” you ask, wiggling around to make eye contact with him.

He frowns and raises an eyebrow, “What do you mean?”

“Oh, I mean, like… are there any places or things in your room that you consider private? Just so I don’t accidentally, you know, invade your privacy,” you stumble.

He hums in acknowledgment, then tilts his head as his eyes search the room, finally admitting, “There’s a notebook in my nightstand. I write notes to people that I never send, things I’m trying to process, stuff like that.”

This brings a huge smile to your face. You stroke his sandpapery cheek and coo, “I love that.”

“Everything else is fine, but that’s something I’d prefer no one read,” he runs a hand over his face and shrugs, and you swear you can see him blush.

“Noted,” you trace his lips with your thumb as you hum the song stuck in your head, then stop and chuckle, “No pun intended.”

He looks down to your mouth, then meets your eyes and quirks an eyebrow. Your fingers ghost down to his chin and you pull him in for a kiss. It’s delicate and it lingers sweetly on your lips. When he pulls back and sighs, you know that he’s bidding you farewell.

You pout, “Do you have to go?”

The pad of his thumb scrapes against your cheek, then he rumbles, “I’ll be back before you know it.”

Once you hear the back door slide shut, announcing his departure, you stand up and tiptoe over to his desk, eyeing a stack of books. A black ballpoint pen lies across the page of an open notebook. Javier’s cursive handwriting is scrawled on the page. Angular, sharp, and heavy handed. Practically illegible, but you can make out most of the words.

How fitting.

You flip to the next page and doodle a cartoon version of the two of you holding hands. Maybe the next time he’s sitting here, brain buried in a cold case or writing letters or whatever, he’ll turn the page and it will make him smile. With a sigh, you flip the page back, hiding your gift to him. Focus returns to the book stack. You grab one that catches your eye, then burrow under his covers.

The bedroom door squeaks open a few hours later, when you’ve burned through a considerable portion of the book, getting lost in the tale of a retired FBI agent turned private detective solving a mystery in a small Colorado town. Your stomach feels sour and angry, but you’ve had moderate success distracting yourself with the novel. You save your spot as he sits at the edge of his bed and asks, “How are you doing?”

“Emotionally? Better. Physically? I feel like I’m on day 2 of a hangover,” you groan and roll onto your side to face him, clutching your belly and mumbling, “It’s so comfy in your bed, though. Smells like you. I like it. And I’m getting super into this book.”

He hums, closing your hand in his as he eyes the book, rubbing a thumb against you affectionately, “The Corpse of Cloud Creek.”

“It’s really corny, but I need to know what happens.”

“I’m hooked on those old mystery novels. Just finished that one, actually,” he admits, then squeezes your hand, “You hungry?”

It dawns on you that you haven’t felt like eating since yesterday, which is probably why you’re so fucking nauseated. Or maybe it’s because you’ve been crying for what seems like forever. Or both. You sit up and wince as your head spins, “Yeah I definitely need to eat something.”

After lunch, you mosey around the ranch with your sketchbook and pencil (the only remaining art supplies you own), stopping to draw things that catch your eye, while the Peñas keep themselves busy. Every once and a while you wander into the barn to check in with Javi and see if they need anything, helping out when the stubborn men actually let you. When Javi comes to tell you he’s done for the day, you’re sitting on the bough of a tree, sketching a baby cow who’s frolicking in the pasture.

“What the fuck are you doing up there?” he squints up at you from the base of the sprawling oak tree, shading his eyes from the sun.

You peer down at him and shrug, “Drawing. It’s nice up here, come see.”

“You want me to climb a fucking tree?” he raises his eyebrows at you and plants his hands on his hips.

“If your jeans are too tight to climb a tree, you can just say that, baby, it’s ok,” you tease from your perch.

The way he looks up at you makes you burst out laughing. Just… mouth agape, tongue in cheek, eyebrows raised as far as they go. He tries to formulate an adequate response to your shit talking, but comes up short.

You cover your giggling face with your hand then call down with a coo, “I love you.”

He shakes his head, then, out of (what has to be) pure spite, he climbs up the tree to sit next to you. The old oak tree is wide and rambling with thick boughs, strong enough to support a dozen more people. He peaks over at your sketchbook and his arm slips around your waist. You feel his lips and mustache press against your bare shoulder, making your heart skip a beat.

“How are you feeling now?” he asks, voice low and quiet, words tickling your skin as they exit his mouth.

You slide your pencil into the spine of your sketchbook and turn to him with a defeated sigh, “I’m dreading going back there, if I’m being honest.”

“My offer still stands,” his thumb rubs against your side. His eyebrows are drawn together. Puppy dog eyes looking up at you, tugging at your heart strings.

As you bite the inside of your cheek, you stare down at your bare feet dangling in the air, “Did you mean it, though?”

“Of course I did, cariño,” he huffs, then tilts your chin so you meet his eyes, “Trust me.”

You search his face and listen to the reaction within yourself. Where you expect to hear a pessimist scolding you for even considering this… there’s only a soft-spoken plea for you to take a leap of faith.

Trust him.

Deep breath in, deep breath out, then you nod, “Ok. Ok, yes, let’s do it.”

151 Fir St N, Laredo, TX July 29, 1998

“It’s open!” you holler from the kitchen, projecting your voice towards the front door. A blast of heat slaps the shit out of your face when you open the oven to pull out the hotdish. The front door swings open, closes, then a moment later Javi walks into the kitchen, holding a bouquet of white roses, lavender, and white gardenias.

You smile from ear-to-ear, pulling off your oven mitts to accept the gift. His hands cup your cheeks as he draws his lips to yours in a kiss hello. When he tries to pull away, you set the flowers on the counter and then wrap your arms around his neck to bring him close again, arching your back towards him. There’s heat in the kiss, velvet tongue running along yours as he backs you against the kitchen counter. He helps you up onto it so you can wrap your legs around him.

Your fingers slide from his neck to his chest, then start unbuttoning his shirt, lips never leaving his. He shrugs the shirt off completely and you splay your fingers across his chest, humming with contentment, savoring the heat from his body on your palms. A tug at your shirt reminds you that it’s your turn, so you reluctantly pause the making out to pull the shirt over your head and toss it onto the floor.

He pulls you against his chest, and your heart flutters. Endorphins flood your brain as you register the warmth of his body against yours, quenching your thirst for skin-to-skin contact. He smells like the love of your life, and you inhale deeply before meeting his gaze and recognizing the molten need in his eyes. The sound of his ragged breath is all you can hear. It’s all you want to hear.

You close your lips on his neck, latching on to the sensitive skin. There’s a rumble deep in his throat as he tips his head to allow better access, which you greedily accept, digging your heels in to get closer to him. You flatten your tongue against his collarbone, licking up his jugular, relishing the salty bite of sweat on your tongue. He gasps and buries a hand in your hair, then uses his grip to leverage your mouth against his again.

“Fuck me,” you whisper between messy kisses.

He licks the words from your mouth and mumbles, “Hello to you, too,” as if he isn’t already yanking your pants off. The buckle of his belt rings out in the otherwise quiet kitchen, and he shuffles his pants off, throwing them in a pile on the linoleum. Now you’re both nude in your kitchen. There’s something intimate about it that you adore. Conversely, the utter depravity of being openly fucked by your lover on the kitchen counter makes your skin flush and your pussy clench.

Goosebumps prick your skin when his fingers slide around your waist and the head of his cock nudges at your entrance, smearing around your slick.

“Fuck, Javi,” you breathe into him, drawing your eyebrows together, seconds away from begging him to do it. He holds his lust-blown eyes steady on yours as he sinks in, splits you open, soft moans fluttering from his lips while your face contorts with pleasure. Your nerve endings light up inside and bliss flows through you, head to toe, like a river.

A few languid thrusts warm you up and adjust you to his size before you rut your hips against his impatiently, trying to shift him into second gear. He reads your needy body language and skips it completely, then starts to fuck you fast and hard. Your fingernails dig into his shoulders as you shudder, shockwaves of ecstasy amplifying throughout your body. A sick wet slapping sound echos off the walls, adding fuel to your desire, making you writhe and whine. His thumb finds your clit and starts to thrum at a steady pace.

“Jesus, fuck- oh that’s so fucking good,” you breathe.

He groans your name and whispers in a rumble, “You like how I fuck you, baby girl?”

Your mouth is ajar as you look up through your eyelashes, into his hot black eyes, and nod frantically, “I do, fuck, I love it-“

“If I ever see another man touching you again, I’ll cut his fucking hands off and shove them down his throat,” he growls. This must be something he’s been holding close to his chest, avoiding since he witnessed Dan kissing and touching you. You remember the tortured way he fought with himself when he saw it. Like he was holding back from doing exactly what he explains now.

The sudden possessiveness makes the fire inside you grow, rippling from your pussy to your ears, making them ring. You let your head hang loosely back as you start to babble, “N- nobody touches me but you. I don’t let him touch me, Javi, I’m yours.”

A shudder racks your body, and you tilt your pelvis at an angle that allows his cock to rub against that perfect fucking spot that makes you sweat and pant. He groans and curses under his breath.

The low hum of static electricity in your belly grows louder, pulling whimpers from your throat. He’s working at exactly the right frequency and speed, and he breathes against your lips, “That’s right, you’re mine. My cariño. My princess. My baby girl. My little slut. Isn’t that right?”

Moans bubble out of you as you nod and gasp, “Fuck yes, that’s right-“

His lips cut you off, catching your whimpers in his mouth when he rolls his tongue against yours. You promise him between messy kisses, “I- I love you. No one- no one else- touches me- if you want me- that way-”

The buzzing of passion starts to boil over, expanding from that spot deep in your center, flooding into every corner of your being, then your body contracts and convulses around him, milking him dry as he spills inside you with a choked moan.

The rigid muscles in your bodies start to liquefy and you feel gelatinous as you soak in the post-orgasm closeness of his heaving chest pressing against yours. Your ear on his pulse, you hear the frantic thumping slow to a regular rhythm. Even then you don’t want to let him go. He kisses your forehead, causing you to stir. When you look up at him, he’s smiling down at you boyishly, “Hi.”

The smile travels to your dazed face and you respond with a drowsy, “Hi.”

“Smells good in here, what did you make?”

“Tater tot hotdish,” you answer. He offers a hand to help you down off the counter, which you reluctantly take, then he assists you in getting dressed again. You know he’s trying to keep you on schedule, but you secretly wish he would have stayed there, glued against you, forever. His ability to calm your body and soul just by pressing his body to yours, as if he’s a healing stone, never fails to astonish you. Once you’re both decent, you point to a cupboard, “Hey can you grab a vase out of there for me, please?”

“For the flowers?”

You nod in response and thank him when he does as you asked, picking a simple clear bouquet vase. He grabs your kitchen sheers and starts trimming the bottoms of the stems off. While he’s doing that, you cut portions of the hotdish, set out plates and forks, then go to the turntable to sift through your record collection.

“Fleetwood Mac ‘Rumors’ or Etta James ‘At Last!’?” you ask as he’s setting the beautiful blooms into the vase.

“Oooh tough choice,” he sucks his teeth, placing his hands on his hips, “Etta James.”

“You got it, handsome.”

Javi pads silently across the linoleum floor as you put the record on, and you jump in surprise when his hands slip around your waist from behind you.

He nuzzles into the crook of your neck, lips parted as they press against your pulse. A shiver trembles down your back and you lay your hands on top of his. His hips sway to the music and you follow his lead, letting the melody slip from your lips as you sing along quietly, “And my heart cried, ohhh- ohhhh- ohh, I love you so…”

When the song fades out, you take a deep breath, so content being here in his arms.

It’s been a difficult last couple of days. This is the last night you’ll sleep in this house. You’ve spent all day going through your belongings to figure out what comes with you tomorrow morning. Every moment here is spent in suspense, hoping you’re not here long enough for Dan to hurt you more. But right now, you feel safe because you’re wrapped up in Javier like your favorite blanket. You’re home.

—

After dinner, you smoke a cigarette as the sun sets. The vivid cerulean sky transforms, a moving oil painting of amber, coral, indigo, and sapphire, spotted with rosy cotton candy clouds. Cigarette smoke wafts into your face, and your nose crinkles as the stench churns your stomach. You grind the offending party against the ground.

“What’s on your mind?” Javi asks. The two of you are lying out in a matching pair of folding beach chairs, smack dab in the middle of the back yard.

The question settles in your belly like a brick, and you proceed clumsily, “I’m nervous. I have to pack so much shit still. I really need to find my car title and birth certificate,” you sigh, “And, you know, just… I feel like he’s not, um, going to take this well.”

There’s that other thing that’s been gnawing away at you, though. The thing that feels like a brick in your belly.

When you went to take you birth control pill on Monday, you realized you were three days into sugar pills without getting your period. With everything that’s been happening, you figured it was just delayed. You’ve felt like shit since Sunday, which you could dismiss as a hangover for one day, maybe two… but it’s been four days of nausea and aversion to particular scents and tastes.

This afternoon, you couldn’t stand not knowing any more, so you took a break from packing and went to a drug store. The cashier, some tiny old bluehair with a southern accent more Mississippi than Texas, gave you a knowing smile, all acrylic and porcelain, as she rang up the 2-pack of pregnancy tests. You read and re-read the instructions as you paced up and down your hallway, telling yourself that just because the test indicated two lines right away, it might change. After all, the box says to wait five minutes after peeing on the stick.

You waited the five minutes. Then five more, just in case. The results didn’t change. Two lines. Pregnant.

Another test. Another two lines. Pregnant.

“Oh, fuck me,” you sighed out loud to yourself, then tossed them in the trash can and washed your hands.

Everything you know about Javi suggests that he will probably react positively, and maybe even be excited if you’re pregnant. But like. Fuck. Fuck. He didn’t want it to be like this. He didn’t want to go this fast. Fucking birth control pills. You want to tell him and it’s eating you alive, but tell yourself that maybe you should keep your thoughts to yourself for once. At least wait until you’re done packing up and leaving your fiancé. This is a lot all at once.

“It’ll all work out, don’t worry,” he extinguishes his cigarette in the grass.

Once inside the house again, you start rummaging through boxes in the office to find your car title and birth certificate. There’s a shoe box labeled “Computer Stuff” that you pull from a shelf in the closet. It seems like it won’t have the documents, because it’s a fucking shoe box labeled computer stuff, but you have a habit of putting things in weird places, so you open the lid anyway.

A lightening bolt shoots through your heart.

Money. Thousands of dollars. A passport, which you open. It has Dan’s photo in it, but the name adorned on it is Robert McCaffery. There’s a second passport, with your photo in it. Melissa McCaffery.

“What the fuck,” you whisper.

Javi glances up from the file cabinet he’s flipping through and furrows his brow, “What?”

You tilt the box so he can see. He stands up with a grunt and takes it from you, sifts through its contents, then tosses it down on the computer desk and stares at it like it contains a riddle. And, you suppose, it does. He runs his hands over his face.

“Whattaya think?” you cross your arms in front of yourself and study his face.

“I think that box fucking reeks to high heaven,” Javi scoffs, then shrugs, “You should take the money and that counterfeit passport, though.”

“You think he’ll know?”

“Yeah, but who gives a shit? How much money did he take from your bank account?”

You chew the inside of your cheek. Javi kneels down by the file cabinet and continues to search, dismissing the weird shoe box. You turn to him, “Why the fuck would he have a fake passport and a stash of money?”

“I can think of a few reasons, and they’re all bad news,” he mutters, “Not going to be your fucking problem soon, though,” then he pulls out a piece of paper from the file cabinet, “Birth certificate,” then a second paper, “title to your car. What’s next?”

You consult your mental checklist, trying to push aside the image of the box filled with cash and fake identification, not knowing how fucking critical it would be for you to do exactly the opposite.

[ Next Chapter ]

[miekasa]

mie!! since u write such beautiful gorgeous astounding breathtaking life-changing tearjerking fics, do YOU have any good fic recs that you personally love 🤔

I do! I have a whole blog of wonderful fics I’ve read (tho I desperately need to update it/reblog the ones in my drafts and tag them) @ackermeun for more if you want because there are many lovely, talented writers; but I’ll list a few of my faves for Levi and Eren below 😌😌

Levi

kiss me more by @vennilavee

Now, I could recommend you anything and everything by Saran and I have no doubt that you would love all of it. There’s not a single thing in her masterlist that I dislike, she even made me okay with the idea of pegging Levi bye. The entire tbah universe (specifically parental moments one) has a special place in my heart, but recently the perpendicular world has been on my mind, and might be coming for number one. Either way, you’re gonna love it. She writes Levi in his slightly bitchy, kinda needy, implicitly affectionate, true to nature form, and I am so grateful for it. Also, Saran is a comedian. 

silver soul by @oi-levi (now posting from @bibblelevi)

I suck at keeping up with series, and, so, naturally, I’m terribly behind on this one, but I’m gonna go ahead and rec the whole thing to you anyway, because I have no doubt that the other chapters are just as great the two I’ve read so far. The way she writes Levi... when I tell you I could wrap myself up in a blanket and binge this whole series, and her entire masterlist, and be very content I mean it; her writing feels warm, that’s the only way I can explain it. 

the art of tea composition by @karikarasuno

I don’t remember how or when I found this fic exactly, probably just scrolling through the tag, but I love it. Domestic fluff with Levi, allowing me to pretend I’m a morning person, and just the right kind of smut to go with it. Simple and very, very effective. I’ve reread it a few times by now, no shame.

where you’re meant to be by @deludedimagines

After you read this, I also suggest just going after the whole masterlist. I cannot express how grateful I am to have found this blog PLEASE. Her characterization of Levi is perfect, and something about her prose feels very clean and simple, but elevated and layered at the same time. This one-shot in particular is one of my favorite canonverse pieces, I’m a sucker for a classic injured lover trope. 

the ones who matter most by @deludedimagines

Yeah... this shouldn’t be a surprise. Fantastic writing, fluff in canonverse has a special place in my heart because I think it can be really hard to pull off well; it’s difficult to balance a sense of softness within the aot universe for the obvious reasons, and getting Levi’s caring nature right can be (unfortunately) so hard to find. Good thing people like Sorcha are here. Enjoy more fluff. Also this fic is particularly fantastic to me not just because of the injured lover trope, but because the 104th babies pay a visit and you all know how much I love a good glimpse of reluctant adoptive dad Levi hehe

bullet by @jean-does-not-have-a-horseface

If you can’t tell by now, I love canonverse fluff, tho this fic isn’t fluff in the traditional sense, but I think that makes it all the much better. Perfect depiction of real life shit that would go down in the aot world paired with Levi’s need to protect his s/o. It’s fantastic. 

the knife by @therealvalkyrie

I didn’t mean to turn this into Mie’s Favorite Canon Fics Showcase, but here we are anyway. As much as I love a good injured lover trope (and this does have that hehe), I love a good kickass reader insert, too. Shoutout to Valkyrie for included both in this fic, and Levi being proud of his s/o... well you can imagine how much I liked that bye

dante’s inferno by @alrightberries

College au + roommates au with Levi... that should be enough for you to read this lmfao, no but actually it’s adorable. Not to mention friends to lovers... if you know me you know how I feel about that, I’ll gobble up every f2l fic until I’m dead and gone. Not to mention there’s a cat and Levi won’t admit he likes it, or he’s jealous of it. Simply cannot go wrong here. 

waves know shores by @onwiings

Bro I don’t even like the idea of public sex and I’m not even a fan of water like that but this fic has me wrapped around it’s pinky lmfaoooo. Some of the best Levi smut I’ve read and you already know how I feel when Levi and reader have cute interactions with the 104th in fics. Really it’s checking every item on my list. 

Eren

speed racer by @emeren

I’m pretty sure I found this fic during my midterms last semester, and when I tell you I’m so grateful for it lmaooo. It’s really just a good au, I think it fits Eren (honestly barking at just the concept) and the writing brings it all to life. 

under the moonlight by @murmikaa

I’d have to be dumb not to recommend this to you. I love reading longer fics, and if you do, then this will 100% satisfy you. The whole story is great and immersive, not just between Eren and the reader; their relationships with the other characters are really what makes this special imo. There’s also beach sex, so. Obviously it’s good. 

untitled.avi by @puredivinity (now @celestidarling)

Naur you must of thought wrong if you thought at least one of Mara’s fics wouldn’t be here. I’m obsessed, I think I’ve read it three times minimum. I read all her Eren fics, and you should too. She writes him in such a dreamy way, almost like he’s right there and too good to be true that you must be hallucinating. Immaculate. 

midnight snacks by @writertitan

Dumb, college-typical antics and fluff with Eren... obviously you know I’m about that. The whole concept is so mundane, but so cute, you can’t help but fall for it because it could be so real!! I love that kinda stuff hehe 

i’m your satellite by @ackerfics

Comparing hand sizes with Eren!! YEAAAAH!! No, okay, but I read the summary and was ready to dive in because... size kink go crazy, but when I tell you I was so blown away to find out that it was not only from Eren’s pov, but that he was being a complete simp and down terrible the whole time. Normalize boyfriends being completely fucking in love with their gfs that simple shit like the size of their hand makes them wanna simp even harder!!!!

eren as an ass man by @hznji

I’m dying on the hill that Eren is an ass guy and you should too because it’s the objective truth. Fluff, Eren being a complete dog as per usual, Eren’s being touchy (I will also die on the hill that he’s touchy as fuck and has no concept of personal space) and just in genral snarky but cute banter. Gotta love that. 

Jean

tears over beers by @appplepii

When I tell you this is my favorite Jean fic, I mean it. Friends to lovers with hopelessly pining Jean + oblivious reader = everything I could have asked for in a fic, AND it’s from Jean’s pov too!!! INCREDIBLE!!! The pining made me yearn, and the smut was so well done, too. 

this drabble by @arlerted

Whatever, whatever, WHATEVER!!! I DON’T WANNA TALK ABOUT IT!!! Cal is right, don’t do drugs but... this mf... this imagine.... has been burned into my mind since the first time I fucking read it bye. Callie also writes a bunch of filthy (affectionate <3) fics and drabbles and lewds and you should read them, preferably when you’re alone and with the lights off. 

[secretsickysideblog]

dumb lucky

"“you know my favorite color?” bucciarati slurs, brows furrowing. “anyway, it also came in purple, and black, and ivory, so I bought all of them, and uh…” “that’s cute,” bucciarati smiles, and abbacchio nearly dies at the way he looks while smiling unabashedly, weak as it may be right now. “you know my favorite color.”'

a mission takes bucciarati and abbacchio all the way to a town in piedmont where bucciarati finds himself fever-riddled in the midst of a snowstorm. abbacchio finds silver linings.

(sicktember day 1 - fever)

read under the cut!

It’s only tradition for things to go wrong for Passione. 

Well, perhaps that’s a lie--normally, they get dumb lucky. But this means that when things go wrong, they go incredibly wrong in multiple ways at once. It’s only fair for the amount of times the gang has narrowly escaped death by the skin of their teeth. And Abbacchio is grateful that neither he nor Bucciarati are running the risk of death right now; it could be much, much worse.

But this mission could certainly be going much better. After all, Abbacchio never thought he’d be buying fever reducers in a little town in Piedmont, Italy as a part of the job of Neapolitan Mafioso. He hadn’t expected to be led all the way to Piedmont in the first place. 

Easy mission my ass, Giovanna, he laments internally, rolling his eyes as he compares the prices between on and off-brand fever reducers. Abbacchio doesn’t usually bother to buy things like this, but Bucciarati’s fever--yes, a fever that had managed to swell up to a whopping 39 degrees overnight while on a mission--definitely needs to be treated. 

He settles on both bottles, and he grabs a pack of water bottles, too. Abbacchio peruses the shelves, considering what else Bucciarati might need. He’d rather not come trudging out through this snow again if he could help it; it started coming down last night and hasn’t shown any sign of stopping since. He grabs another thermometer, a can of soup, and he’s about to head to the register when he spots something else that catches his eye.

It’s a large blanket in blue--Bucciarati’s favorite shade of blue (not that Abbacchio bothers to remember things like his Capo’s favorite color), and god, does it look soft. His gaze wanders to the window. Snow falls in clumps, kicked up into a white mist by the wind, and Abbacchio could shiver just looking at it. He does shiver thinking about the short walk back to the motel through that storm. 

Abbacchio sighs, runs his fingertips over the inviting fleece. A blanket couldn’t hurt. 

He grabs it and tucks it under the arm without the basket only to spot that there’s another of the same in purple. And another, in ivory? Abbacchio isn’t someone tempted by luxuries, but blankets in the cold seem like a necessity. 

So he picks up both. Because Bucciarati has to sweat out the fever anyway, right? He’s too out of it to be angry, anyway. 

Abbacchio lugs the three heavy blankets and the basket of various other supplies to the register, fishing around in his pocket for his wallet. The cashier looks over his selection as she rings up and bags each object, smiling fondly. 

“Taking good care of someone, I see.”

Abbacchio huffs, lips quirking upward to a ghost of a smile. “Yeah, I guess I am. It’s about time he lets me.” 

“These blankets are on sale, you know. Buy one and the other is half-off,” and, in an expertly-crafted manner of egging him into it, the cashier finishes her sell with, “Everyone loves a good blanket. Perfect to cuddle up under.”

Abbacchio doesn’t anticipate growing the balls to ‘cuddle-up’ with Bucciarati, but something about the idea sways him into it. He stares at the blanket shelf in consideration for a long moment before giving in and grabbing a fourth, this one in black. 

The cashier is, clearly, proud of herself. Abbacchio can’t find it in himself to get as annoyed by this as usual. He did fall for her marketing scheme, after all. Can’t bitch about it if he gave in. 

Altogether, he walks out of the store with five bags slung on his arms, four of which are occupied by heavy fleece and tied off to avoid any of the snowfall. His boots feel like weights as he trudges through planes of muddy white, wrapping his scarf tighter around his neck. His hands are freezing--he wishes he’d bought gloves. 

When he finally returns to the motel room, Bucciarati is curled up on the bed. He looks just about the same as he did when Abbacchio left which is, admittedly, like shit. His hair, lacking its typical braid, fell in uneven layers wherever it wasn’t sticking to sweat-soaked skin. The only real color in his face is across his cheeks in bright, splotchy red, and though his eyes are closed now, they’ve been glazed over all morning. 

Abbacchio shakes his head in disapproval, wondering how Bucciarati managed to just ignore this, because he knows damn well it didn’t just spark overnight. He must’ve been feeling at least vaguely unwell before they’d embarked on this (unexpectedly) lengthy journey. Abbacchio tells himself, as he has every time he starts thinking about how his Capo sucks at self-care, that he’ll just bitch at him about it later; criticizing a sick person is mean, and besides, there’s not enough cognizance in his fever-addled head to comprehend annoyance right now anyway. 

He unties his scarf, shrugs off his coat, and unbags the items on the small coffee table in the room. Bucciarati stirs into half-lucidity, as told by the mix of a groan and a whine that slips from him after a bit of shifting around. Abbacchio looks over to him, seeing his hazy blues blink open, and he immediately grabs the bottle of fever reducers to force down his throat now while he’s just awake enough to swallow and not awake enough to protest.

“Here,” he holds out a bottle of water and two of the pills for Bucciarati to take, which he does after taking a second to process the command. He moves sluggishly, but he manages to get the pills down and put the water bottle on the nightstand. Abbacchio feels his forehead with the back of his hand, frowning at how much he’s burning still.

He goes to pull away. Bucciarati doesn’t let him, grabbing his wrist and holding his hand there.

“What are you doing?”

“Cold,” he mumbles, letting his eyes flutter closed again. “Feels nice.”

Abbacchio opens his mouth, closes it. Thanks the lord above that Bucciarati can’t see the way his cheeks heat up as though he’s contracted a fever. After a moment of hesitance, Abbacchio brings both of his hands up to cup Bucciarati’s cheeks, and the other man sighs contentedly. 

“Well, if it’s cold you want, maybe you should go take a nap in the snow,” Abbacchio jokes.

“Hm,” Bucciarati takes a breath. “Perhaps I should.” 

Abbacchio stares down at Bucciarati. At the way his eyelashes, dark and thick, fan out across his cheeks. At his lips, still pretty and pink and miraculously not very chapped. Even now, sick as a dog, Bucciarati is gorgeous. Abbacchio could watch him forever, he’s sure, but then he realizes how creepy he’s being and abruptly pulls away. Bucciarati’s eyes open with a dejected look to them, and Abbacchio reminds himself that it’s not because it’s his hands, it’s because his hands are cold and Bucciarati is delusional with fever.

“Uh, so, I got you two kinds of fever reducer, and you’re gonna take it whether you like it or not,” Abbacchio starts to say, clearing his throat. Bucciarati hums, half-listening. “I got water. A can of soup, if you get hungry, but since you just woke up I’m sure you’re not yet.”

Bucciarati doesn’t respond, so Abbacchio assumes he’s right. He’ll make him eat something later. 

“And,” Abbacchio unties the other four bags, “I know you’re not looking to get warmer, but fevers have to be sweat out, right? I got blankets. They were on sale.”

Bucciarati almost whines, though it’s quiet, subtle. Abbacchio opts to ignore it, because it does nothing good for his heart. 

“Yeah, yeah, I know, but look, it’s your favorite color,” Abbacchio holds up the blanket in proud display. Bucciarati looks at it, but it’s clear that he’s not fully seeing it. 

“You know my favorite color?” Bucciarati slurs, brows furrowing.

“Anyway, it also came in purple, and black, and ivory, so I bought all of them, and uh…”

“That’s cute,” Bucciarati smiles, and Abbacchio nearly dies at the way he looks while smiling unabashedly, weak as it may be right now. “You know my favorite color.” 

Abbacchio takes the tags off the plush fabric and chucks it at Bucciarati. Bucciarati, as expected, makes no move to catch it. It takes him a minute to slip the fleece off of his head and onto his lap. This process is repeated four more times as a mountain of plush fabric piles up on the bed--the singular bed, which Abbacchio would be incredibly nervous about if this was a year ago, but they’ve been stuck in the ‘unfortunate’ one-bed scenario too many times for him to care anymore. 

“This is...so many,” Bucciarati murmurs, staring down at the pile. He runs his thumb along the hem of the blue one. “They are soft, though.”

“I don’t know if you can feel how cold it is in here, much less out there,” Abbacchio gestures towards the storm just beyond the windows, “but we needed them. I don’t know how long we’re gonna be stuck here, between your fever and the bastard we’re after.”

Bucciarati nods, absently petting the blankets. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“Falling ill,” Bucciarati says it like it’s the most obvious reason to apologize in the world. “We’re stuck here. It’s my fault.”

Abbacchio rolls his eyes. “Stop apologizing for things you can’t control.”

Bucciarati looks like he wants to protest, but then his expression turns confused as if his own thought process doesn’t make sense to him anymore. Abbacchio snorts at the sight and shakes his head before climbing into bed beside the other man and urging him to lay back down.

“I’m all sweaty.”

“I don’t care,” Abbacchio pulls one of the many blankets around them up to his shoulders, and another about halfway above that. He lets Bucciarati kick the others aside. “You’re warm, and I’m cold. I’m finding silver linings.”

Bucciarati chuckles a little. If he were any more coherent, he’d make a joke about Abbacchio’s usual pessimistic cynicism being an act; the latter is almost grateful, at that thought, for the fever. The wind howls outside as the storm picks up. It’s definitely not an ideal situation, but it could be much worse.

Bucciarati turns to nuzzle his face into the crook of Abbacchio’s neck. Tentatively, Abbacchio wraps an arm around him.

Maybe this was just dumb luck in disguise. 

[obeymebabes]

💕💖 Appreciation post for the people who have made my 2020 manageable! 💖💕

2020 has been a rough year for everyone, myself included. However, this year has also been one of the best for the simple fact that I have met so many amazing people. This is going to be a post about some of the (many) people who have made my 2020 livable. Thank you. I love you all so much.

First, I have to say a great thank you to all of my absolutely amazing followers. Never in a million years would I have guessed that a blog like this would have given me so much joy and happiness. I was never super confident in my writing, but my perception has shifted quite a bit thanks to all of your appreciation. I love each and every interaction that I have on here, and I can’t thank all of you enough for the love and positivity you have made me feel. You all deserve the world and beyond.

Second, I’d like to thank all of the lovely and wonderful discord babes. The amount of joy that you all bring me is off the charts. I would tag each and every one of you but there are literally so many of you. I just hope that all of you discord babes, (including the ones who don’t talk or interact very much), know that I love you so much and I am so lucky to have met you all. I don’t know what I would do without you all.

There are a few others who I would like to individually thank for making my year, (and my life), so much more manageable.

(Note: Even if I didn't tag you individually, I still love you.)

@irlmammonn

There is literally so much I could say about you. First things first, I don’t know where I would be without you. You are my best friend. The one friend that has been by my side for soo many years. I literally love you like family. We have shared so many amazing memories both before and recently. I couldn’t have asked for a better friend. You’re always a great support, even when I am at my worst. Thank you for everything you’ve done for me personally. I wouldn’t be where I am today without you. I mean that. I'll always be by your side if you'll always be by mine.

@deanobeanoqueero

Dean. Where do I even begin with you? Do you know how much happiness you bring me? You are literally a star shining so much light in the dark. I seriously don’t know how I got lucky enough to meet a real angel, a literal Celestial Realm sent angel. I know I have said it so many times, but my opinion won’t ever falter. It honestly feels like I have known you my whole life, and yet I've only known you a few months. You deserve all of the love in the world for being such an absolutely amazing being. From your flawless looks, to your adorable personality, you’re truly a blessing. Yes, this includes your cursed brain. Thank you for literally just existing, I love you so much. 

@livingemerald

I know you weren’t expecting to be on this list. Though I have no idea how you wouldn’t be on it. I think it’s funny how I recall that you originally said that you were afraid to talk to me because I had a fairly large following here on tumblr. Now I don't think there isn’t a day that goes by where we haven’t talked. Kat, I don’t know what I’d do without you. Truly. You’ve been an amazing friend, so much so I’m having a hard time putting it into proper words. You have so many amazing qualities. You’re a great listener, you’re practical, you’re one of the more talented artists I’ve ever met, you’re caring, the list can literally go on forever. Thank you, so much, for everything. I love you like family at this point.

@whatissleepeven

Chaos bean. Jester of Chaos. The embodiment of dumbassery. The amount of times you've made me smile just from your quirky little antics is unmatched. You're incredibly funny, sweet, not super smart but you do have your moments, and most important of all, you're you. I've never met someone with such an interesting sense of humor before. But I've smiled and laughed a good dozen times at least with you around. You are deserving of so much. I am really glad to have met you. I love you Sleeg. Even if you make me want to scream sometimes. Please no more arson. I beg of you.

@comet-tails

Ghooooost. You're like a sibling to me. We have literally so much in common. I can't express how happy I am to have you in my life. You're a really extraordinary person and a real sweetie. You provide me with so much serotonin, and I don't mean just with the cute animal posts, but talking to you in general. You're a lovely person, and deserve so much good in your life. Thank you for always being there, listening and bringing me happiness. It really does mean so much to me.

@devildomexpress

First of all, wow. Who would’ve thought we would be this close all because of my brain asking for cursed outfit swap edits. Thank you, by the way. For not only that, but for messaging me at all. You’ve earned quite a special place in my heart. You’re honestly so sweet. So kind. So caring. So loving. All of it. You’re literally a heaven-sent. I don’t know what I would do without you. You’re like my own personal guardian angel, and I couldn’t have asked to meet someone better. I love you so much and I am incredibly thankful to have you in my life.

@persephones-star

I don’t even know if words can explain how grateful I feel to have met you. The amount of times that you’ve made me smile are uncountable. You’re an absolute sweetheart. I know we don’t talk too often, but I feel graced by your presence when we do. The amount of times I have sat and laughed my ass off while reading our dumb conversations about the OM! boys is unreal. Talking to you honestly just feels like a dream. You're too good to be true. Thank you for bringing me so much joy over the past few months, whether you have realized it or not. You deserve the absolute world and beyond. 

~ Bey 💙

[taehyungsgrowl]

AND THEY WERE ROOMMATES!

‘Here is an “Oh! No! I’m quarantined with my roommate, Jim, who I happen to have sexual tension with” blurb that literally, no one asked for because what else am I supposed to do? Decompose? 

I wish. 

It’s been a day but I hope you like this.

ALSO, fair warning - there is no plot, really. Shameless smut. Also, the tone of this is really casually, now that I read it back. IDC. Enjoy. 

warnings: smut, quarantine trope

You laid in your bed scrolling through the same few apps over and over. It had only been a few days since this quarantine nonsense and you already wanted it to be over. You were tired of seeing the same thing on the news over and over. All you wanted was something to take your mind off of this pandemic. 

The only thing you could be grateful for at the time was who you were stuck in the house with. 

You had only been living with your new roommate, Jim, a few months before this all started. Ever since move-in day you weren’t able to keep your mind from wandering about Jim. Those pretty blue eyes and easy laughter were a way to your heart. 

Of course, not wanting to make living arrangements weird, you kept those thoughts to yourself. However, he didn’t make it easy; always coming home from the beach without his shirt on, always inviting you to cuddle on the couch with him... sometimes those lines between roommates or more blurred too much. 

And being locked in a house with him with no other distraction or outlet... focusing on anything other than wanting him was incredibly hard. 

“Y/N,” you heard his voice call you from the living room. “Come here,” he whined. 

You glanced in the mirror giving yourself a look over before heading out. It wasn’t like he hadn’t seen you at your worst before, but you still wanted to leave an impression on him. 

“Hey,” you ruffled his hair as you passed him on the couch, taking a seat next to him, “What’s up?”

“I’m bored and you’re locked up in your room.” he pouted. It made you just want to bit down on him pretty plump lips. “Figured we might as well be bored together.” he chuckled. 

He leaned back in the couch, one arm thrown lazily over the cushion. He relaxed in a form-fitting white t-shirt and gray sweatpants that just drove you crazy. 

“Sure,” you smiled at him, bringing your legs up to the couch. You noticed his eyes lingered a little longer on your legs, making your face warm up. “What did you have in mind?” Everything in the room seemed quieter - the TV was still blasting whatever rerun he was watching, but only you and him seemed to matter at that moment. 

Jim scooted closer to you on the couch, his arm now draped over your shoulder. “I’m sure there are ways we can pass the time,” his tone was suggestive as his eyes looked down at your lips. 

You squirmed in your seat - sure, Jim had always been a little flirty, but he’d never been this suggestive. 

“Yeah, but what?” you repeat, feeling your heartbeat quicken as thoughts of having what you’ve been dreaming of come true. 

“Don’t play dumb, Y/N,” he chuckled, lifting your chin up to get a look into your eyes. “Tell me you don’t want me as much I want you right now?” his voice was low and silky. 

He leaned forward until his lips ghosted over yours, you could smell his minty gum fan your nose. “Hmm?” he questioned, a smile in his tone after you didn’t respond to his question. 

“I want you,” you admitted, closing your eyes in hopes that he’d finally press his mouth on yours. 

Jim complied by grabbing your face in his hand and kissing you firmly. 

You felt his fingers in your hair and you melted into him. You pushed forward kissing his deeper. 

He steadied you back into your place as he pulled away, smirking as you frowned for being cut off from his lips. “You really didn’t think I knew?” he reached for your hips and pulled you into his lap. You settled into him, your legs on either side of him. “I see the way you look at me,” his nose dragged along your jaw, “I notice all those cute little outfits you like to wear to bed.” He snapped the waistband of your pair of pink short sleeping shorts, “These are my favorite,” he winked. 

“Not to mention,” his eyes met yours, “I’ve heard the ‘Jim... Oh, Jim, fuck, fuck me,’” he mimicked your voice, “That you moan in the shower.” he spoke against your lips. 

God you thought to yourself. There was a mixture of arousal and shame bubbling through you. 

Had it been that obvious to him as well?

“Aw, don’t get all shy on my now princess,” he mumbled against you. 

“Tell me what you want.” he continued, his fingers dancing along your sides. 

“I want you to fuck me, Jim.” you could feel his bulge pressing against the thin material of your shorts. 

“Can’t believe,” he peppered kisses along your jawline and neck, the chuckle he let out under his breath sending tickles to your skin, “It took a global pandemic to get you to admit it,” 

“Hush,” you grabbed his face and pulled him back on to your lips. He chuckled at your desperation, but could you really be blamed? You had been waiting for the moment for months. You began to rock back and forth on his lap, your silky short sliding against his pants. 

His hand came down to smack your ass, gripping it. “Told you we’d find a way to kill time.”

You grew wetter as his hands roamed under your shirt and began groping your breasts; you never bothered to wear a bra around the house and you (and Jim) were grateful for it now that he squeezed them and toyed with your nipples. 

Both of you explored one another under and over your clothes as you made out on his lap. No rush - not like either of you had anywhere else you could go. You started to grind down harder in his lap, feeling the fabric of his sweats rub against your pussy. 

“Makin’ a mess?” he groaned, hooking his arms around your waist and standing up with you in his arms. He walked to the edge of the couch and set you down in front of the armrest. 

“We should take care of that...” he pushed you forward until you were bent over the armrest. His long finger wandered up to your thighs, dipping into your shorts to feel the pool of arousal you had. 

He brushed them over your pussy. He didn’t notice just how sensitive you were to his touch. Barely even touched you and your breathing changed. He brought his coated fingers out and pushed himself against your ass, slowly teasing himself (and you) by moving his hips against you. Jim tapped his wet fingers against your mouth - you opened and took his fingers in, sucking on them like you would his cock. Your tongue circled around his digits and you suckled softly, taking them further down your throat, moaning for him. 

Jim pulled his fingers out of your mouth and hooked them into your shorts, pulling them down in one fluid movement - he was done teasing for now. He felt his cock throbbing in his pants. 

He quickly discarded his clothes before grabbing his cock and using his tip to play along your slippery slit. One large hand was placed on your lower back and he slowly pushed you further, bringing you into the right position. You arched your back and looked at him over your shoulder. 

“Please, just fuck me, Jim,” you sighed. 

He pushed into you, slowly letting you adjust to his length. One of his hands held himself at the base of his cock while the other tangled into your hair. “Fuck,” he snapped his hips forward. 

“Oh my god,” This was everything you’d been dreaming about. His thick cock inched more and more into you until his balls met your skin. You could feel him pulsing inside of you. 

“You feel so good, fuck,” he groaned as he started to pump in and out of you. He went almost completely out before ramming back inside. He pulled on to your hair as his pace quickened. 

“Jim, fuck, Jim.” you whined his name over and over, much like you had during your shower sessions. “Please. Fuck, harder.”

“Harder?” he took you by the hips and began pounding deeper. “That’s it, baby,” he encouraged

Your legs began to shake and you were thankful for the couch (and Jim who held on to your hips to tightly, you could already imagine the bruising he was leaving). 

“I’m gonna cum,” you warned him, biting down on your lip.

His hand slapped down on your ass again. He watched as it bounced under his hand and that was almost enough to push him over the edge. 

“Go on,” he pulled you up against his body, holding you there with his cock deep inside you as you finished. Hearing your sweet moans and curses, Jim finished as well. You felt his cum drip down your thighs as soon as he pulled out. 

Jim turned you around and kissed you hungrily. He knew this changed your relationship from roommates to well... he wasn’t really sure, but he was eager to find out. Maybe quarantine wouldn’t be so bad after all. 

“Can’t believe we didn’t do this sooner,” he said, pressing his forehead to yours. 

--

anyway i dont care for this really ksdfjs but i wanted to do something so here u go and pls be nice lol 

tagging: @xavierplympton​ @desertsunflower00​ @praythatwitch​ @angxlbaby666​ @moonanonwriting​ @lizhomitz1984​ @amethyst-v​ @lovelylangdonx​ @angel-langdon​ @spoo-per​ @langdonswhoreprobably​ @midnightontheearth​ @quillanpie @sadhoecentral​ @little-grunge-flowerz​ @victoriageiser​ @satcnas​ @littlegirlsdontplaynice @cam-elija​ @pppsssyyyccchhhiiiccc​

[crionsbelt]

This may or may not go up by the time midnight hits or slightly after for me, let’s see what happens! I’ve been working on this since 9:30 PM EST, I expect it’ll be done by 12:50 AM EST. Hopefully I’m right so it ain’t too late gjnhg

For starters: Happy New Year everyone! Hard to believe we lived in the decade where this beauty was created. Nonetheless, there are multiple people I want to thank -- along with a much needed personal note from me. Everything will be put into a read more, but trust me, it’s long. Thank you all for making the final days of this decade very welcoming for me!

@kiidreamu​ & @theabyssalmuses​

It’s rather silly for me to start with you two, because I’ve got quite a bit to say; so here goes! I’ve known you two for...quite a while huh? I can’t recall the exact time, but I know we’ve been mutuals since I went by Phantom -- which was a long while ago. Regardless, I’ve always enjoyed you two on my dash; and I’ve always really liked interacting with y’all OOC! I’ve always had a blast speaking with you two (specifically now w all this fuckin Bear Ass shit).  I really enjoy the way you two write your muses, I think you both should have a lot more faith in them because they’re very fun to see on the dash! It’s pretty clear y’all put a lot of effort into your writing, even if you say you don’t, I for sure notice it.  Hime, I know you said you admired me - but there’s nothing to admire! You and Kii are equally as good as me, but I’m definitely not much. However, I never posted it (because I had it in my drafts and still do) because it meant a lot to me. I’ve never been told something like that aside from Norgie, so it made me feel happy in a dark time.  Thank you both for continuing to be my friends, truly. 

@fantasyacrossworlds​

Awoo! You and I have known each other for a long time, too (most people tagged here I’ve known for 2 - 4 years hujhj)! I’m VERY happy that we’re mutuals again, I’ve truly missed interacting with you! I’m so glad that it seems Orion and Cass are going to have a chaotic friendship that will always end on Orion running to Artemis LMAO. I’m looking forward to more interactions! 

@sanzenxsekai​​ 

I already gave you a super long post explaining how much me and Norgie are thankful for you, so I’ll remind you in a tl;dr version. WE ALL LOVE YOUR STINKY GREMLIN + YOU!! Please keep writing Nobu in 2020! Thank you so much for being such a good friend to me. 

@mcphistcples​

You don’t even realize how much of a positive impact you’ve had on both me and my girlfriend. You’re absolutely hilarious and I’m incredibly happy you chose to start interacting with a disaster like me. As a Dies fan, I fucking love your Rein. You write him fantastically and it’s always fun to see your interactions with BB’s JAlter.  I am looking forward to the dramatic reading of My Immortal: Bear Ass Edition : ) 

@stxrdust-pxper​

We haven’t talked much OOC properly, but we’ve known each other just about the same time as me and Norgie have been dating - so almost 2 years! You’re a pretty cool person, I’m happy you joined my new server because it’s given myself and others a chance to chat with you more. Thank you for all the kindness you’ve given me throughout the time we’ve known each other, I’ve never said it until now, but it truly has stuck with me and helped me become happier.

@bloodsoakedsakura​ / @idoldragos​

There’s actually a lot I’d like to say, some I’ll leave out for now. For starters, thank you for having my back for three years straight. Seriously. You’ve been there for me through a whole lot, honestly surprised you’ve stuck with me for as long as you have.  You’ve stood up for me when the time came for it and I’m honestly so thankful you did. Every time you hop in call with us it’s usually always fun and stupid (in a good way), so thank you for being part of my band of misfits as long as you have Sades. Even though you’re a boomer who didn’t stop me rolling 200 of my Quartz, I forgive you... dontkillmepls

@yuichiroswife​

Speka, you’ve been a great help to me and Norgie a great amount of times as of late. Thank you so much, you’re an incredibly kind person and I’m glad we became friends!!

@muniificus​

I’ve known you for 3 years too I’m 90% certain, it’s insane how long I’ve known a lot of you - it feels like forever but it also feels like time has gone by so quickly! Much like Sades, I’m very thankful you’ve stuck around for as long as you have Icarus. Thank you for putting up with my dumb ass, and ultimately having fun in return! alsoihavethereplyforanastasiadraftedipromise

@fakepriest​

I’ve sent you an ask with a lot of what would’ve been said in here, but I want to let you know that I’m extremely grateful that you’ve kept being my friend to. I enjoy our conversations a lot, especially when we talk about things like Heaven’s Feel because they’re usually always such fun things to talk about. 

Much like the ask I’ve sent you, your Kirei is so scarily accurate it nearly simulates his actual personality flawlessly. That’s how scary good at writing this tofu loving fake priest. I’m so happy it’s you who’s writing him, not to play the pedestal game, but I genuinely can’t see anyone else (not even myself) coming close to how phenomenal your portrayal is.  #kireisquad

@arkdiia​

Though our first conversation first chatting again wasn’t expected, I’m super glad you came back to Tumblr and I’m thrilled to be friends w you again! Hopefully for 2020, you and I /both/ catch a break lmfao.

@saintguine​

Much like Anna, I’ve already told you what I wanted to here in the form of an ask a few hours ago - however, I do wish to say smth that I’m sure a lot of people feel. Regardless of how you think about yourself, you’re a very good person BB and we’re all very blessed to know you. You’re absolutely one of my best friends, and though there was a point where we lost communication for a bit, I’m very grateful our friendship is the exact same. 

We all care u BB, thank u for bein gud to all of us

Kayla & Sere

This post is incredibly long already, luckily I’m just about done -- but I’ve got three people to go starting with you two!

Sere, you’ve heard me vent a lot and you’ve known me (Kayla has known me this long too) for a pretty damn long time if you ask me, 3 years may not seem like a lot to people, but with all the stuff we’ve all gone through these 3 years? It’s been a LOT and I can’t say I’d be the person I am without you hearing my dumb ass vent and creating Cursed Night.  I appreciate all of your icons, thank you for giving us (Hell) special treatment with them. Seriously! While you are a best friend for sure, you’re also practically family to me. Thank you again for everything. 

Kayla, the same of what I said for Sere is said for you. You’re legit like my older sister, you’ve been there for me for just bout the same amount that Norgie has; you’re someone who means a lot to both me and Norgie, so thank you for giving talking to us a chance way back when you were shy (I think that’s what it was!). There have been a lot of ups and downs for all of us, but I’m glad the downs at least had the positive effect of giving me a second family who I love dearly. I actually teared up on this part, so god help me when I write for Norgie.

@letoborn​ / @uwuwrote​

I’m going to save a lot of what I want to say to you for our anniversary in June, but I will say a few things because I love you so very much.

When I met you, I was not expecting you’d turn out to be the woman of my dreams. You’re genuinely my better half, and I have never been as happy as I am than I am with you. You’ve truly had the biggest impact in my life Norgie, you’ve made me laugh, cheered me up when I’m sad, called me out when I was dumb and helped me better myself. 

I’m so incredibly happy I got to spend the rest of the last decade being your boyfriend, and now, going into 2020 - a whole new decade with you. Like I said, you’re my better half - I can’t see myself with anyone else but you. You’re the greatest treasure in my life, I’m so happy we’ve had all this fun with roleplaying.

Thank you so much Norgie, for giving me Orion/Artemiis, all of our other ships - being my soulmate (at least, I think so). I hope 2020 treats us both well, but I’m willing to go through whatever as long as it’s with you.

Now, that’s the end of that -- but I have a few extra things to say.

My 2019 has been...quite possibly the hardest year of my life, at least on the internet. For a very long time, I was fearful of interacting with others - I made mistakes that I wish I could take back, I got put through hell for nothing...man, I don’t wanna go back in and say what happened, what is and isn’t true -- the long story short is, shit happened, but it’s the past now. 

I want to go into 2020 just..as positive as I can be, I’m tired of the drama, I just want to have fun with my friends and my girlfriend you know? So, I’m finally choosing to move on and just...try having fun again. This choice would be impossible without the people mentioned in this post. 

From the bottom of my heart, thank you to all of you who have stuck around through it all for me. I’m so incredibly thankful to be part of the friendgroup I’m in, to know everyone I’ve met who’s put up with me. I’ve had so many times where I wanted to leave this site, but I wanted to keep trying to write with everyone -- to have fun with everyone. You all have no idea how genuinely happy you’ve all made me, just by writing with my Orion and Norgie’s Artemis. 

Though I couldn’t think of anything to say specifically for the others tagged below here, thank you all for everything as well -- just following me makes me happy. I’m sure I’ve forgotten some people, but trust me, I’m so very happy to know all of you.

@dekirukoto @wisesteyed @lacobscur @akhilleuskcsmcs

[ohmytheon]

Press F

Day 2 for @shigarakiweek: Teamwork

Summary: Keep your enemies close - and your online friends willing to play the support and healer positions even closer. (AKA: Shigaraki unknowingly took Kaminari under his wing while gaming online when he was fifteen, but neither one of them actually bothered to figure out who the other person was and instead became sorta friends.)

Notes: Although this can very much be read on its own and I might write more for these two dumbasses, technically speaking, this is a prequel to Reconfigure and a spoiler for Chapter 24, although it's not a huge deal of the fic. This is pretty cracky, but I'll be damned if it's not one of the funniest things I've ever imagined. I've got a bunch of ridiculous headcanons. I didn't know it was Shigaraki Week this week until this morning, so when I saw the prompt for today, my brain went into over-drive. Hey, I guess I can knock something off my To Write List now? Also, apologies for not being like a ton of thought into Shigaraki's gamer name, but hey, I did my best in the thirty minutes I wrote this.

                                                         - - - - -

ThePalebloodStrider: you up for a few rounds?

TazerBlazer: yeah man i got school tmrw but lol fuck it

ThePaleBloodStrider: you’re an idiot

TazerBlazer: hey my grades aren’t that bad TazerBlazer: also i’m not the one with the creepy ass s/n :P

ThePalebloodStrider: it has meaning

TazerBlazer: yeah lol ok edgelord

ThePalebloodStrider: god you’re such a kid

TazerBlazer: bruh you been know TazerBlazer: we gonna do this or what?

Shigaraki peeled his gloves off to rub his temple. He hated wearing gloves when gaming - they totally messed with his dexterity - but Kurogiri said he couldn’t get another controller for two months if he disintegrated another one. His suggestion to wear gloves had been met with a lot of complaints and stomping around on Shigaraki’s part, but in the end, he’d dug a pair of gloves out of his nightstand and jerked them on with even more grumbling.

It wasn’t his fault that controllers were made to be held with all five fingers or that people online were such fucking idiots. Did these assholes even know how to play? They were wasting his goddamn time. Of course, if he stuck with simple RPGs, then maybe he wouldn’t have so many problems, but he had a viciously competitive side that craved destroying actual people instead of just computer NPCs. There was nothing quite like lording a top-ranked position in multiple rounds over others. Even his teammates got frustrated when he was infinitely above them.

He didn’t know why. They should be grateful since they were so pathetic and dumb. He wasn’t insulting them if it was the truth.

Tazer was different. He had been able to tell right off the bat due to his mic and playing style that he was younger than him, but he was infinitely helpful. Shigaraki wasn’t immature enough to not recognize the signs of someone that would be good in a party. There were a few people that were good at playing roles on a team. He was a leader, but a leader wasn’t a leader unless they had a follower. Tazer was chatty as fuck and tended to make impulsive decisions, but he was also reliable and a great team player.

A dumb, annoying, little shit, but happily willing to play the part of a healer and offer support in every campaign and game they played together, so Shigaraki would take it.

As the game loaded, he idly scratched his neck before remembering to Not Do That and then put his glove back on. Today had been frustrating. Okay, so he was sixteen, but he wasn’t a kid. He was fucking sixteen. There was no need to treat him like a child. Why couldn’t Sensei see that? It was like he flip-flopped between forcing Shigaraki to learn incredibly hard and brutal lessons and then acting like Shigaraki wasn’t capable of doing shit. He was ready for some real fucking action, but no, Sensei said that he had to wait. He was still learning.

It was hard to feel like he was being taught when all he felt was trapped. He knew the world wouldn’t actually want him, so he stayed inside. What little communication he did have beyond Kurogiri, Sensei, and a few of the villains that worked under him was online. And it would always stay like that. That little brat Tazer wouldn’t be so friendly with him if he knew what Shigaraki was actually like. The whole attachment was fake, but it paid off. It wasn’t real. It wasn’t-

“Aha! I got the mic to work. I thought I shorted it out.”

Shigaraki readjusted his headset. “Again?”

“Hey, hey, don’t get on me about that. Didn’t you say this is like your tenth controller?”

It was his fifteenth, but luckily Kurogiri didn’t know about at least six of them. He also didn’t know that Shigaraki might pickpocketed a few of the men that came to visit Sensei over the years. If they weren’t going to take care of their personal property, then what did it matter? Yes, he got a personal allowance that he kept very good track of, but he got in trouble for damaging stuff constantly.

And getting in trouble with Kurogiri was one thing, but with Sensei? Displeasing him was...unsettling. It was perhaps the only reason Shigaraki hadn’t argued with him more over things, especially since the fight that left him severely injured. He was recovering, which was why Shigaraki wanted to do more for him, but no, they had to stay quiet for now.

He had to be good - which meant no more destroying stuff in a temper tantrum.

“Whatever,” Shigaraki shot back. “You need to learn how to control your quirk more.”

“I am!” Tazer insisted. “I’m getting real good at it. I mean, my parents get onto me all the time because maybe I fry a few things once in a while, but I can even charge my own stuff now.”

“You’re using all your brain cells to charge up your electronics.”

“Well, you’re using all yours to be an asshat,” Tazer laughed.

Shigaraki furrowed his brow. No, he used his to be smart about shit unlike most people online. Okay, so he was probably an asshole too, but he didn’t need his brain for that. He could be one simply because he was better than most people on here. He liked to come up with strategies and plans, which Tazer dutifully followed for the most part. Young as he was, he liked being helpful, and he liked winning even more. At least he recognized his leadership qualities.

It wasn’t bragging if he knew he was smart. Tazer had been astounded that Shigaraki figured out he had an electricity quirk, but honestly, it was a no-brainer considering his gaming tag. Plus, he always felt like people with electricity quirks had more energy. Maybe that was why Tazer never seemed to have any issues staying up at all hours of the night gaming despite having school the next day.

When their game finally started to load, Shigaraki relaxed. The other team was filled with players holding high ranks. Man, it was going to be good to smash them. Nothing quite like taking down a few egos. Someone could play fifty times more than another player, but timing playing would never beat natural talent or inherent skill. It was why he stuck with Tazer. The kid played using instincts.

“Oh!” Tazer exclaimed excitedly. “Did you see the trailer for that new Godzilla movie?”

“There’s another one?” Shigaraki scoffed. “What’s this one? Thirty?”

“Don’t knock it, bro. It looks awesome! I’ll DM you the link.”

“I’m not gonna watch it.”

Tazer blew a raspberry. “Just watch it!” A notification popped up in the corner of his screen alerting him to a message with half of a YouTube link showing. “You’ll thank me later.”

“I doubt it.” Shigaraki would watch it later, but he might not admit it for a while. Let the kid hang a little. It was good to starve people of immediate validation - made them more patient. At least that was probably what Sensei thought. He could probably stand to work on his patience more, but he was getting better. He hadn’t thrown a fit the last time his connection had lagged while playing.

“E3 is coming up, so you’ve got a site to stream that, right, ‘cause-”

“Hey, kid!” some asshole from the other team named TopAlpha1321 barked. “You gonna ramble the entire game like a dweeb? Shut the hell up!”

“Stop being such a bottom,” Shigaraki snapped before muting the guy. He could see his name light up as he went off, but nothing could be heard.

“Eh? But his name says ‘Top’?” Tazer paused thoughtfully. “What’s a bottom?”

Shigaraki choked and held the mic of his headset to keep from being heard. Oh, shit, he knew that Tazer was a few years younger than him, but sometimes he forgot how much of a gap in information about shit there could be between their ages. Truth be told, he only knew about the term because of listening to chatter while gaming and accidentally stumbling across a very reprehensible site that nearly made him disintegrate his computer, but Tazer was dumb enough to look it up and-

Tazer laughed. “I’m just fucking with you, dude! I know what that is. I’ve got the internet.”

“You’re too young for that,” Shigaraki admonished, half out of shock and half in irritation for being tricked. Tazer might’ve been younger and a dumbass at times, but he could be a clever, little shit too when he wanted to be. It was probably why they worked so well together.

“What are you? My older brother?”

“Shut up and follow me.”

“Copy that, Captain.”

Shigaraki didn’t know why he put up with him. Oh, wait, that’s right - because the kid was quick as shit and always seemed to know when he needed back-up or to be healed. Maybe he wasn’t the best shot and he couldn’t tank for shit, but damn if he wasn’t sharp in that respect. People naturally good at support roles were not to be knocked. After all, a party couldn’t be complete or well-rounded without them. When it was time for him to take over and lead in Sensei’s stead, he’d made sure that he had a good team.

[iplaydrake]

Full Circle - Chapter 4 - WE'RE BROKE... SEND HELP!

Catch Up Here :

CHAPTER 3 - GOOD-BYE TO ALL THAT

Author’s Note : This story is gonna get a little dark. Suicide, Assault (both physical and sexual), Gun Violence, Blood, Swearing. Please read with caution. Positive feedback, constructive criticism, and reblogging are always welcome. I own nothing except the storyline of my MC. Everything else belongs to Pixelberry.

Pairing : (Eventually) Drake x MC

Tag List : @likethetailofacomet @carabeth @rhymesmenagerie @speedyoperarascalparty @butindeed @wannabemc2 @client-327 @jovialyouthmusic @be-still-my-aching-heart @riseandshinelittleblossom @lodberg @drakesensworld @alj4890 @jlouise88 @ao719 @andy-loves-corgis @drakewalkerisreal @whenyourheartskipsabeat @furiousherringoperatortoad @silentcoyotesong

​

She thought she had prepared herself to deal with her past, but nothing could have prepared her for the feelings she had when she saw Drake for the first time. She was proud of herself for keeping her cool, but as she walked away from him and Kiara, she suddenly felt overwhelmed. She texted Maxwell to let him know she was not feeling good and she was going back to her room to lay down. After packing her bags, she laid on her bed thinking about how she got to where she was and much to her dismay, her mind slowly drifted to that night... 

*** FLASHBACK – SWEET 16 *** 

She walked out of the bathroom and heard someone call out to her. “Happy Birthday, Lady Remington. My, don't you look... Pretty!” She couldn’t help but recoil at the tone in Madeline’s voice, but still smiled as she greeted her, Kiara, and Penelope.

“Thank you, Countess Madeline... Girls... And thank you all so much for coming to my party!” 

“Oh, of course dear! So, listen… We have a little surprise for you!”

“Really? You didn't have to. Just having you come-”

Before she could finish, Madeline grabbed her by the hand and led her outside towards the stables. It was dark and Remi could barely see anything in front of her. Suddenly, out of nowhere, she was grabbed from behind, a hand clamping down over her mouth. She began to fight as hard as she could as she recognized the voices around her, and she feared the worst at hearing Lord Neville and Tariq. She screamed for help but it was no use.

“Hurry! Get the cloth for her mouth!”

“Tariq, hold her down!”

She continued fighting, and as soon as she felt the hand lift from her mouth, she screamed with everything she had. “Drake, help-!"

She could feel Madeline’s breath near her ear as the cloth was roughly placed in her mouth, and Remi’s eyes went wide as she spoke, “Oh Duck, you can’t be THAT dumb… You think Kiara's boyfriend is going to help you? What makes you think he's not guarding the door?” 

***** END OF FLASHBACK *****

She was quickly brought out of her thoughts as Bertrand came barging into her room, Maxwell behind him with apologetic eyes. “Remington, have you forgotten where you've come from? You were incredibly rude today. These people came to your home to support you after the death of your parents and you just ignored them all day.” 

After everything she'd been through that day, that was the last straw. She did nothing to hide her anger as she slowly stood up and glared at him. “You know, you have a lot of nerve, Bertrand. Don't you DARE tell me these people, who, in case you forgot are the reason I left home to begin with, came here for me because that's bullshit and you know it!” 

“Remington watch your tone.”

“No, Bertrand! I'm not a child, and you will not scold me like one! I owe these people nothing and I’ll be damned if you think I’m going to kiss ass for-”

As she was speaking, Maxwell noticed her bags packed by the door and interrupted her. “Remi, what... Are you leaving?”

“You're damn right, I'm leaving. I'm going back to MY life in New York where I've been doing just fine without you people.” As much as it was aimed at Bertrand, she immediately regretted it as a look of hurt flashed in Maxwell's eyes. 

Before she could apologize to him, Bertrand spoke up. “You can't leave. There is an urgent family matter we need to discuss.”

“Whatever my inheritance is from Father's Estate, keep it! I've been fine without anyone’s help since I turned 18 and I'll keep being fine on my own.”

“There is no inheritance, Remington! We're broke! And this year's social season is about Prince Liam trying to find a Bride. So, you need to step up for your family and try to win his heart so some semblance of normalcy can be returned to us.”

Maxwell knew what was coming and winced involuntarily. “Are you kidding me right now?! SERIOUSLY?!” she screamed. “You haven't spoken to me in 6 years! How many times were you around when I was on the phone with Maxwell or Mother and you couldn’t even be bothered to say hello?! Hell, you didn’t even let me know you had a goddamn kid! And now, you're trying to PIMP me out so you could continue living in the 'lap of luxury' you've become accustomed to?! Well, you know what, Bertrand? GO FUCK YOURSELF!” she stormed out, leaving him stunned. As she made her way out of her room, she nearly ran right into Liam and Drake, who quickly jumped out of the way, knowing they had been caught eavesdropping. They avoided eye contact with her, each pretending to admire a painting on the wall. “Just fucking perfect.” She mumbled to herself.

Maxwell was so proud of her in that moment. He smirked and shook his head at Bertrand, before following Remi out of her room and down the hall. He knew exactly where she would be. It was her favorite spot in the whole house and at this moment he was grateful he was the only one who knew about it. As he walked past Liam and Drake, they all shared a quiet laugh at Remi's outburst. If there was any question as to whether NY was good for her confidence, she just proved it had been.

She sat with her legs dangling off the edge of the roof, shaking her head as she heard Maxwell come up behind her. She took another puff of her cigarette before putting it out on the shingles. “You know, that should have been included in one of our many conversations over the years... Along with the tattoo!” He said, motioning to the small semi-colon on her wrist.

“Tattoos... Just in the interest of full disclosure.” She said with a laugh. “And this I don’t do often, just when I'm stressed. And trust me, right now I am definitely stressed... Maxwell, I'm so sorry about what I said. I didn’t -”

“Stop! I know what you meant.” They smiled at each other before he continued. “Listen Rem, as much as I don't want to agree with Bertrand, he's right. We need you and it's not just because of the money.”

“Maxwell, you can't be serious?! You, of all people, know what I went through as a kid at court. You think I want to willingly put myself through all that again?”

“I know, but you’re not that kid anymore; there is no more “Ugly Duckling”. And hey, who knows? Maybe this is exactly what you need to help put everything behind you, to put that night behind you…” She started to interrupt, but he put his hand up, stopping her. “I know you don’t want to talk about it, but I’m here when you’re ready. I promised you in New York and I’ll promise you again. I’ll protect you this time, no matter what! You won’t be alone!” 

“I… I don't know if I can face everyone, Maxwell. Today was a lot harder than I thought it was gonna be. And to have to rub elbows with the likes of Madeline and Kiara, just to get to spend a couple of extra minutes with Liam, I-” 

“Woah, LaLaLaLaLa!” He put his fingers in his ears before continuing, “Listen, I'm the VERY LAST person that wants my best friend to be dating my sister, so let’s pretend that’s not why you’re doing this... Look at it this way: if you stay, you'll get to show everyone else up. You could use this as an opportunity to beat Madeline at something she’s convinced she’s already won! Not only that, I just got you back. I'm not ready for you to be gone again. And as for our brother? He means well… I think when you showed up 21 years ago he had no idea what to do with you!” He laughed at his own joke as he put his arm around her, pulling her close to him and she laid her head on his shoulder.

“I don't know how you keep convincing me to do things I do NOT want to do...”

His head shot up, “Really?! Does that mean you'll stay? That's so great! Let's go tell Bertrand.”

She sighed as he helped her stand up and they headed inside through the window. They walked the way they sat; His arm around her, her head on his shoulder. They stopped in the living room, noticing Bertrand talking to Liam and Drake. 

“Remington, we should continue this discussion in private.”

“No need, Bertrand, I'll stay.” He was about to interrupt when she put her hand up to stop him, before continuing. “I have a few conditions though.” He eyed her expectantly. “First of all, you are not allowed to have any expectations. I'm staying for myself, to get closure. Whatever happens, however this plays out, is on my terms. Second, you will not interfere, in anything…” Her voice had been firm until that point but softened as she continued. “Unless I need you to. And finally, me and you… We’re fixing our relationship. You must have dinner with me once a week… and we have to talk... The whole time! That’s it, it’s not up for discussion.”

She held her hand out for him to shake as an agreement of her terms and he stared at her, seeming to weigh his options. He stuck his hand out as well, but she immediately pulled him into a hug and smiled to herself as he tensed up. “Get over it, Bertrand. We’re family!”

Drake, Liam, and Maxwell watched the exchange, all feeling relief that she was staying for now. She slowly pulled back from Bertrand before turning to face everyone else. She smiled at Maxwell and Liam, but as she looked at Drake, it slowly faded and she turned to walk away. She made her way into the kitchen and opened the freezer before grabbing a pint of ice cream. She propped herself on the counter, opened the drawer in between her legs, and grabbed a spoon before digging in.

“Ahem? Can we talk?”

She looked up before rolling her eyes. “Why talk to me when Kiara is probably waiting for you in your bed…”

“I guess I deserve that... I mean, I really don’t, but...”

“Really? You don't?”

“No, I don’t… and if I do, I have no idea why. From what I remember, me and you had an understanding. I thought we were good, Remington. When Maxwell called me and told me what happened that night, it felt like my heart stopped. The next thing I knew you were gone, and I was devastated and alone and-”

She started talking over him, almost as if he hadn’t spoken a word. “I mean, looking back now, it makes complete sense… Kiara must be REALLY good in bed if you were willing to help them do that to me. Tell me something, was the "haircut" your idea?” She laughed lightly but she could feel herself on the brink of tears, and this time she was going to do nothing to stop them. “Do you want to know what I think the most disgusting thing might be, though? The fact that you hugged me… You remember that? Right before we left each other at the table, you wiped my tears and you hugged me. You’re good, Walker, I’ll give you that and you may have everyone else fooled but-” He was suddenly confused as he really listened to what she was saying, and he cut her off before she could go any further.

“Do that to you?... Wait... Do WHAT to you?! You think I…?” He fumbled again with his words and he suddenly felt sick to his stomach as he realized that all this time, she thought he had something to do with her birthday. “Remington, I... I promise you, I had nothing to do with what happened to you... I would never... You mean too much… You know me! You know-”

“No! Everything I thought I knew was wrong!” She looked right at him as she spoke through her tears, “Just tell me why, Drake... Why would you do that to me?... Why would you make me believe-... Did I mean nothing to you?” She lowered her head, her tears finally falling. He could feel himself fight his own as he slowly walked up to her, coming to a stop between her legs, and spoke quietly.

“Remington... I’ll do whatever it takes to prove to you I had nothing to do with that night. I promise... Whatever it takes.” She kept her head down, but through her tears, she watched his hand pull something out of his pocket, before putting it on the counter next to where she was sitting. He hesitantly kissed the top of her head, letting his hand linger in her hair for a moment before turning to walk away. She cried harder as she picked up the slightly tattered blue Tiffany box and looked at the tag. Now more than ever, she was sure that everything she thought she knew was wrong.

Want to continue? Click below for the next chapter :

CHAPTER 5 - DRUNK HIM CAN’T GET OVER HER

[iamalover13]

Hi, Taylor! My name is Brittany. I know you’re probably getting as many tags and messages as you are getting views and you probably won’t read this or respond, but I want to send you one anyway, just by the chance you can hear how you have saved my life; because there isn’t anyone like you. I have been struggling with mental health issues since 2012 and I have been in and out of hospitals for years due to suicide attempts and ideation, because I literally have no worth, hope and I genuinely believe that I will never be okay; but you (especially with Reputation) have given me the energy and confidence to dance like no one is watching and sing at the top of my lungs and feel genuine happiness and excitement when I feel like I have nothing left. This new single could not have come at a better time. I recently had a break up with the love of my life who made me actually WANT a future and things have really plummeted and I have lost all of the minimal confidence I had and I just got out the hospital last week and I’m now starting this Intensive Outpatient program that has me so stressed out, it gives me another reason to give up. But you, you gorgeous specimen, have released this song and given me a reason to keep going. A reason to keep fighting. A reason to do this treatment. Something to dance for. Something to look forward to. Something to live for. Sending a message that maybe there is something good about me when right now, no matter how deeply I love and care about people, they don’t want to be around me. And you’ve given me this little sparkle of confidence where I could make this tumblr and actually reach out to other people (because I’m too shy to post or talk to other people and just show anyone and everyone how embarrassing I am). I went from seeing you at the Erie County Fair in New York to seeing you at the Rogers Centre and I cannot wait to come see you again. I’ve never had the money to get good seats, and I still don’t, but you can bet that I will spend every penny to get a front row seat and to get backstage passes, because just seeing the person who actually makes me want to live and maybe just giving her a hug once in my life could be enough for me to make it through. And I’m NOT asking you for anything, because I’m going to work my ass off this summer to give you all the money you deserve, and honestly I don’t think this whole world would be able to provide that to you. I just really really wanted to tell you how much of an impact you have made in my life, because it’s really important to me and I want to thank you so so so so much for being the light in my life. I’ve never really felt that I’m glad I survived, but I do now, and that’s pretty cool.

P.S. I’m so grateful for the digital copy of the album, because on November 10th, 2017 I pre-ordered the CD and UPS said I had an invalid address and they would “try again tomorrow” and I tracked that dumb UPS truck for over an hour to ask them for my package. you definitely put the ME in impatient😂

P.P.S. I’m also a linguistics major and it’s so so incredibly genius to use an interjection as a place holder to rhyme with word you wanted!!! absolutely amazing and brilliant. Okay I’m gonna shut up and stop nerding out on you.

Long Live 💗💗💗🦋🦋🦋🌈🌈🌈

@taylorswift @taylornation

[northofsomewhererp]

Your Name, Age (17+), & Timezone: Meg, too old, EDT

Zephyrine Oriana Bowie turned 17 years old on March 14th. She’s a junior at Greensville High School. Her faceclaim is Billie Eilish.

Bio:

As a lover of all things strange, you could guess that Zephyrine Bowie tends to stand out in a crowd. From her peculiar fashion sense down to her creepy obsession with the dead, she was never one to fit in.

When Mélissandre Thibert, her biological mother, passed away due to some post-birth complications, no one really knew what to do with the little girl. Her father was a one night stand: he’d never even pretended that he’d be a part of that child’s life, and Mélissandre didn’t expect him to be, either. Her life had been on a steady decline: she lost her job, was battling addiction and had just gotten dumped by whom she thought to be the love of her life. In some ways, Zephyrine was her saving grace, her one reason to try and get better. And for a while, it worked. But ultimately, she was in too poor a condition previously to be salvaged by 9 months of self-care.

When it all came down to it, the only person who stepped up to the task and wanted that child was Makani Bowie. He’d been a pen-pal of Mélissandre’s for nearly 10 years now, and although they hadn’t met more than 5 times, they made sure to talk every day and video chat weekly. It was nothing if not platonic, but nonetheless he was all she had left. With him residing in America and little Zephyrine being in France, it wasn’t an easy task. But after a long, strenuous process, he was finally able to adopt the little girl and bring her back to his home, in Greensville. Makani’s mother often referred to her as a demon, recalled seeing something ‘wicked’ in the little girl’s eyes the moment she was first brought into the family. Eff grew up alone with Makani and his son, Lazarus. Even without a mother, she never lacked anything: she’s forever grateful for that.

In elementary school, Bowie started to display an explosive character. She didn’t have a good relationship with her classmates. From the get-go, she was an easy target for kids to pick on. It didn’t help that at any given chances, Zephyrine would go on about how she believed in fairies, mystical creatures and witchcraft. But in all honesty, she couldn’t give a flying fuck about what others thought of her, she liked to embrace who she was and her beliefs. What were these kids to her anyway but mere classmates? When they started to spread vile rumors about her and her family, she started to lash out at them. Especially at girls. She’d decapitate their dolls and pick up fights. Pull, scratch and bite. During this time, she often found herself in the principal’s or the counselor’s office, and this carried on into her high school career. Needless to say she didn’t have many friends, still doesn’t. But she likes it that way. Now a junior in high school, it seems as if most of the kids she went to elementary with forgot about her. In fact, it was during the summer before her freshman year that her appearance took a drastic turn and she’s basically unrecognizable anymore. Zephyrine started getting inked and dyed her hair all sorts of fantasy colors. Her peculiar sense of fashion draws attention, but the good one this time. Eff is usually quiet, for the simple reason that she prefers discussing with the dead rather than the living. Yet she’s not afraid to speak her mind. It comes pouring out of her without any effort. In that sense, she’s incredibly blunt and lacks a filter. Some have called her rude, but she doesn’t care. Regardless, Bowie is a very smart and articulate young lady. What most people admire about her is obviously her open-mindedness. She’s also a big fan of DIY projects and any sort of crafts, which makes her somewhat resourceful. She’s someone that although you may need some time getting in their good books, once you’re in her circle you can always count on her.

Activity (1-10): 5

Have you read the rules?: removed

In the event that you leave, can we keep your biography for future use? *grabs zephyrine* no she my baby

Any comments/questions?: no thank u ♥

Sample( 2+ paragraphs):

Night had always been Zephyrine’s favorite time of day for as long as she could remember. The starry sky, chilly breeze and complete silence were only a few things she enjoyed. But tonight, she found herself in a totally opposite setting.

When her brother, Lazarus, asked her to tag along to a gathering on the beach, Zephyrine didn’t think twice about it. Their Meemaw was coming over, and no opportunity to be as far away from the woman as possible were taken for granted. What she hadn’t taken into consideration when blindly accepting was the amount of people that would actually attend, or how Laz was bound to dump her to go french some random person at some point in the night.

Zephyrine’s currently sitting in front of the bonfire, throwing anything she can find into the flame and watching it burn. She hasn’t spoken to a single soul, and Lazarus, of course, is nowhere in sight. It wouldn’t be as bad if the bonfire wasn’t surrounded by couples practically fucking right then and there. She hadn’t expected this big a turnout, and the crowd was starting to make her feel antsy. Throwing one last empty can of beer into the fire, Bowie decides to get up and head towards the shore.

The further away she gets from the crowd, the lighter her steps feel. It’s not that she was afraid of people, not at all. She was just very picky with people she allowed close to her. Eff held everyone to a higher standard due to past hurt, which made getting close to her very difficult. And Lazarus’ friends? They definitely weren’t her type. Funny how her brother was the person she got along with best, but his choice in friends was so poor. When she reaches the shoreline, Zephyrine crouches down and drags her finger against the damp sand. She isn’t drawing anything in particular, just letting her hands wander around and she finds herself way more entertained than she’d been the entire night. That is, before someone pulls her out from her bubble.

“Boo!” Lazarus startles his sister, bursting into laughs when she topples over face first into an incoming wave. Now drenched in ice cold water, Eff wipes a hand down her face.

“You motherfucker!” she exclaims, springing up into action and staring at him with wide eyes. She tries so hard to keep her angry act, but a smile can’t help to pull at the corner of her lips. This just amuses Laz further.

“I didn’t think you were so fucking clumsy, chill out Eff”, he rolls his eyes, and that earns him a hard shove from his sister. He stumbles but his feet remain planted into the ground. “Nice try, sissy.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. I’m gonna catch a cold because of your dumb ass”, Bowie sighs. She grabs a handful of her hair and twists it so drain the water out. A slight rustling sound catches her attention and when she looks up, Lazarus is draping his jacket over her shoulders.

“Here. Are you having fun? Except the possible hypothermia, I mean”, he asks with a sheepish smile. He picks up a beer bottle, presumably his, and takes a long swig as he awaits her answer.

“Are you seriously asking me this, Laz?” Zephyrine retorts. “I thought you knew me better than that, wow”, she puts a hand over her heart, dramatizing the situation and that manages to make her brother chuckle.

“I know you’re dying on the inside, sue me for being hopeful. Y’wanna go home, then?”

“Your unbuttoned shirt and raw lips tell me you don’t”, she crosses her arms over her chest, an eyebrow quirking up as she eyes him from head to toe.

“Ah, shut the fuck up. It’s a party, what did you expect?” Lazarus counterattacks, visibly taken aback by the comment, flustered even.

“For you not to dip your dick in the first chick you see, maybe?”

“To be fair, I dipped it.. but in her mou-”

“Ah ah! Stop talking, TMI, Laz… TMI!” the girl interrupts him, nose wrinkled in disgust.

“Fine, okay. Still doesn’t answer my question. You wanna go?” Zephyrine bites her lip, avoiding his gaze as she shrugs. “Zephyrine…” he warns, and that makes her snap her head up to finally look at him.

“…yeah, this sucks. And I’m cold. I just know you’re having fun and I don’t wanna force you to leave. But if Dad picks me up, then Meemaw’s gonna-”

“Zephyrine, calm down, it’s okay. This is getting boring, anyway. We ran out of beer, I’m good with leaving”, he reassures her, stepping closer and pulling her into a hug. He sways them from side to side, purposefully making them tip over as if to almost fall, but he catches them back every single time. They both laugh in unison, and that’s the first real laugh Effy let out tonight. Lazarus moves back only enough to look at her. “Even if I didn’t wanna leave, I’d leave for you”, he presses a soft kiss to her forehead, but she pushes him away.

“Gross, you’re drunk”, she states as she wipes away the spot on her forehead he’d kissed.

“Maybe I am, so what?”

“Don’t kiss me, period. Especially not when you ate pussy, you reek of it!” That comment makes Lazarus burst into giggles, almost falling over his sister. “God, you’re done, let’s go”, she wraps an arm around his waist and starts walking away.

A comfortable silence settles between them, and that’s something she always appreciated from her brother. There wasn’t a need for small talk, they could just revel in each other’s presence without a word spoken. And so, the entire walk home was spent without a word being exchanged. Zephyrine was cold, slightly buzzed and tired, but as they strolled through Greensville together, she couldn’t help but think maybe this night wasn’t so bad after all.

[expensiveminimalist]

Tinkerbell’s Cheesy 21st Celly

Hello my lovelies! As long as I’ve done this properly, this should be posted just after midnight (New Zealand time) when it is officially September 22nd and my 21st Birthday! 

So I decided to do this a little while ago to celebrate my 21st birthday. It’s basically a chance for me to express how much all the amazing humans I’ve met on here mean to me, and so my cheesy little ass can be even cheesier 😅 

There’s a handful of people that I have to specially point out because of how much they’ve impacted my life, and I’m just so fucking grateful for every single one of them 

Firstly, my darling @stephisinspace 💕 (i know you don’t use your tumblr that much now so I’ll probably send this to you on insta or facebook) You were the first friend that I ever made on tumblr and I cannot even begin to explain how much you mean to me. You’ve helped me work through so much shit in my life even when you’ve had your own stuff going on, and I know that I can always talk to you about anything. I love how you’re my niece’s ‘Aunty Steph’ who lives on the other side of the world and will probably never met her, but loves her as much as I do 😂💕 I can’t wait to come hang with you in Ireland one day and I’ll drag you back here to hang with my puppy dogs (hey you can even meet our niece then 😂). I love you so much you insanely talented, beautiful, intelligent, loving and incredible babe 💕💕

@floralsmatthews BITCH I LOVE YOU AND I DON’T KNOW HOW ELSE TO SAY IT 💕 I seriously don’t think I’ve ever clicked with anyone faster than I have with you and I just fucking worship you ok, like I swear to god if we don’t fuck up Toronto together then I will be super pissed. Can’t wait to be a bridesmaid at your wedding to Auston 😉 virGANG FOR LIFE TT 💕

@trashforhockeyguys NIC MY BABY TINK 💕 I can’t explain how fucking much I adore you, like you literally make my day. I love how we literally talk about the most random shit and end up forgetting what we were actually talking about because my dumb ass can’t stop talking about having Willy’s babies or sucking Kappy’s cock 😂 You are so easy to talk to and you are like the best hype girl ever and I just seriously fucking love you and I’m SO looking forward to our Zoey 101 marathon and going trick or treating dressed as Tinkerbell since I’ve never got to do that before 😂 I LOVE YOU, MY CHILDREN’S FUTURE GODMOTHER 💕

@squilliamnylander Riley, I have so much to thank you for and I don’t even know where to begin 💕 Thank you for inspiring me to write again and making me fall in love with writing again. Thank you for introducing me to the most incredible group of humans who do so much more than just fawn over Freddie 😂 Honestly, thank you for dealing with my annoying, clingy ass because I appreciate you so much and I can’t wait to come hang with you one day and FOR SURE go to a Leafs game 💕

@thecambridgees MADDY, MY JOLEX SOUL SISTER 💕 Ugh, I just love you and your contagious sweetness, and the fact that I know no matter what happens I can freak out about Grey’s with you 😂 I’m SO excited for when we get our Jolex back next week and can freak out all over again because they’re MARRIED like actually MARRIED 😍 Thank you for constantly killing me with your gifs and edits (including the ones of our royals munchkins!), I love you my sweet, sweet Italian 💕

@thiccthighsandhockeyguys HEY WIFEY 💕 Seriously, I fucking adore you and I know that they day Rielly gets the C, I’m gonna hear you screaming all the way over here at the bottom of the world 😂 But seriously, I love how damn sweet and intelligent you are, and you’re humour is out of this world amazing and I’m just in awe of you. You are literally a fucking GOD-DESS and there’s like a 2000000000000% chance your selfies are gonna kill me with all that perfection 😍 I LOVE YOU 💕

@inthebyf my ‘mom’ friend 💕 you are the BEST person to come and talk to about anything because you always know what to say and you always have the best advice and I can’t tell you how grateful I am for you 💕 You’ve honestly taught me so much (that you probably don’t even realise) and I’m so grateful that you’ve opened my eyes to so many different points of views on everything in life. I can’t explain how much respect I have for you, I genuinely just think you are one of the most amazing people on this planet. I can’t wait to go on a date with you and your freaking adorable lil turtle 💕

@psychospeak-blog a.k.a the person that owns my emotions 😂 I don’t think you get how much I idolise you when it comes to writing, like I’m convinced you invented writing and no one can change my mind 💕 You are so amazing for reading my terrible smut and reading my average fics, and I can’t thank you enough for letting me vent about writing stuff, talking me out of stressing like an idiot over writing and letting me freak the fuck out over the perfect Tyler that you’ve made steal my heart (and if I meet him and he’s not like how he is in Won’t Go Slowly, I will sue HIM). Love you, you crazily talented and gorgeous human J! 💕 

@westanaustonsforehead also, the one person that can make me cry when I read your tags on my Willy fic 😂 I really don’t know what else to say other than the fact that you are so fricken sweet and are genuinely one of the loveliest people on tumblr, and I love you like A LOT. I also can’t explain how much it meant to be when you sent me that message to do with anxiety because it honestly helped me so much and you saved me from a massive panic attack that day 💕 Ugh, I totally wanna hang out with you but I live in Hobbit Land so when i win the lottery I’m totally coming over to hang out whether you want me to or not 😂💕

@motoleafs IDA! 💕 My Nylander encyclopaedia who I am constantly in awe of like every second of the day. You are seriously so lovely and I’m so thankful for you answering my many questions (naturally, Nylander related) and for honestly furthering my love of hockey 💕 You are so welcoming towards everyone in the hockey tumblr community and that’s honestly one of the things I love so much about you, and I’m so grateful that we started talking my darling, Leafs Queen 💕

@mystupidlovesongs I NEED A HUG 💕 You have me sold with your humour, your absolute fucking sweetness, your intelligence and of course, your Vogue worthy selfies 😍 I’m still waiting for you to go and get Cash and Marshall so they get the insta love they deserve that Gerry-Whore Tyler refuses to give them 😂 Also expecting an invite to yours and Colton’s wedding just fyi 😉 I LOVE YOU AND I’M SENDING YOU AIR HUGS FROM NEW ZEALAND 💕

And finally, to every. single. one. of the incredible humans apart of @the-andersluts 💕 I love each and every one of you SO much and I’m so incredibly grateful that I get to talk to all of you all day, every day and know that we’re always there for one another 💕 You have all opened my eyes to so many different things going on in the world and in your own lives, and I can’t thank you enough for broadening my view on life and teaching me how to be a better human. You are all such incredibly talented, intelligent, courageous, strong, determined, loving, supportive and beautiful humans and, again, I love each and every one of you more than words can describe 💕 You have all seriously changed my life & can’t imagine it without you 💕

[cryptid-crusader]

My Tumblr History (feat. a LOT of rambling, I apologize)

I’ve been on Tumblr 9 years. I came to Tumblr from Xanga (which IDK if that’s even still a thing or not) after being thoroughly obsessed with latter for about 4 or so years. Xanga was much more of a typical blog blog, and though I interacted with far less people on it, those few I did became honest to god friends that I still think about to this day. Though, as years past, my few friends began to drop off one by one from the site and I found myself enjoying it much less once they were gone. Eventually, I left too.

A few months later, I decided to join Tumblr. It was still a fairly new site in 2010 when I had joined, and I had only heard a few things here and there around the internet before I decided to check it out myself. When I first started, I used this site a lot like I used Xanga and basically had it exclusively as an internet journal to talk about life and nerdy shit and the like (I remember even thinking the reblog option was dumb because why not just make your own content? Why reblog other peoples stuff? loooool) and also did a lot of those writing daily challenges. Do you guys remember those? I loved them. Anyway...

Needless to say as time went on and I got older and followed more people and gained more followers (some of you have been here from very early on and for that I am incredibly thankful) as dweeby as this may sound, I really grew as a person. God, I remember 9 years ago I would sometimes post uncredited art or really insensitive, not funny at all, “jokes” because I honestly didn’t see a problem with them (and the only reason I really remember these awful things is occasionally once in a blue moon random people would find them in the bowels of my blog and like them and I would shudder and delete them). I kinda started Tumblr as this young social media doofus that, again as cheesy as it sounds, learned a lot and grew from my experience here. I would never dream of posting uncredited art now, and those “jokes” make me want to vomit. I learned a lot about social issues through this blog and it also helped me open up and learn about my sexuality. I got to see a broader world view from all different walks of life here (which was incredibly refreshing after growing up in a very close knit predominately white republican community) , and met some fantastic humans I’m blessed to have interacted with and become their friend. I never would have met them without this site!

Not to mention just like... all the cool shit. There are SO many talented people on Tumblr. So much beautiful art, fantastic writing, and just all round hilarious and interesting humans that I loved to get even a small peak into their lives and learn about them and what they like and do for fun. I’ve picked up hobbies through this site, joined fandoms through this site, made friends, laughed endlessly, become inspired, found some of my favorite anime/books/movies, and have had so much fun in these nine years on Tumblr.

... Not to say that it hasn’t been without it’s bad. I’ve been here long enough to remember when Tumblr users proudly boasted about how open and inviting to any and all people they were, how they would never point fingers, be mean, or turn others away. Boy, how that has changed looool. I’ve been through the annoying but innocent enough superwholocks and the scandals of older users who used to be Tumblr royalty that fucked up in some way and fell from grace, to the disgrace of people who are totally fine humans that didn’t completely cater to exactly what certain people wanted or made a few wrong steps that people felt like they had to attack them viciously for the littlest asinine shit. The good the bad and the ugly, all the way through to now.

Now. :(

To be frank, this entire site has been a disaster for a loooooooooong time with a staff that seems to be equal mix of not knowing at all how to run a functioning site and not giving a shit at all about it’s user base and their feelings (which reeeeeeeally sucks for all the fantastic content creators and people who have been here forever who have essentially made this site what it is). Little things like ‘oh we made an update that ‘everyone’ will love but is actually dumb as hell and just pisses people off’ to their have been porn bots, pedos, and nazis on this site for YEARS terrorizing people and being awful but guess that is just how it will be... Until they got banned from the app store and THEN it’s an issue (because they lost money ofc)!

Suddenly, Tumblr staff cares, but only for themselves. Instead of actually resolving the issue THAT HAS BEEN GOING ON FOR YEARS AND IS AN EXTREMELY WELL KNOW AND COMPLAINED ABOUT ISSUE they just decide fuck it, punish everyone. No “porn” at all, but I use that term lightly because they say some nudity is allowed (don’t get me started on female presenting nipples it also makes me laugh to hard and then I won’t be able to type) and for some reason apparently written erotica is allowed (which makes absolutely zero sense if you are truly trying to make this a ‘family friendly’ site, why is visual porn not allowed but written OK?) but... Is it really? Posts that are completely innocent are getting tagged left and right as not suitable content. Like, thousands of posts are getting tagged by whatever stupid algorithm they are using that are completely void of anything remotely sexual and you expect me to believe your incompetent asses are going to go through them and deem which are OK and which aren’t based on you shoddy stupid ass new rules? Fuck that. 

And all the sex workers and people and run side blogs and NSFW art blogs and the like are just completely screwed (no pun intended). It upsets me because like... Porn blogs have never been the issue. There are definitely some horrible ones, no denying that, but for the most part they just stayed in their lane and interacted with other porn blogs. They weren’t the issue (And, if Tumblr knew at all how to create a damn site, they wouldn’t have been an issue at all if the damn safe mode toggle actually worked like it was supposed to). The ungodly amount of bots is the fucking issue. I can tell you right now, I have over a thousand followers and I am in no way kidding when I say half of those are porn bots that I just gave up reporting because I get like, 3 of them following me a week on average. It’s ridiculous! Also, ACTUAL FUCKING CHILD PORN? THAT IS EASILY ACCESSIBLE EVEN WHEN NOT LOOKING UP ANYTHING NSFW (which I very unfortunately know through experience)? And to top it all off, fucking NAZIS who for some reason are still allowed to spew their bullshit on this site??? Is this a nightmare?

So with all this happening, I believe it’s pretty safe to say Tumblr’s days are numbered. It makes me laugh and cry, it’s something you could see coming a mile away and yet something that you didn’t think would actually happen. I don’t want to leave Tumblr. I love you guys (the users not the staff). You have all brought joy and enrichment to my life and I am so grateful I got to be here with you. I also just like a lot of nuances of tumblr, like the fact I can read an entry so powerful and moving it brings me to tears and then just one post underneath is an over baked nonsensical cat meme which has me wheezing for reasons I can’t quite explain. I can be anonymous and as weird as I want to here without having to really worry about family, coworkers, or older friends seeing it and being like WTF is wrong with you, what does all this mean??? I like how my blog looks and how I can bitch in the tags and chat with my friends and message people and talk about my oc’s and randoms interests and get pointers and learn new things and AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I love Tumblr. I don’t want to leave and don’t necessarily plan to. But then again, I said they same thing about Xanga, and if Tumblr keeps going in the way it is going... I’m not sure I really truly  want to be lumped in with that. :/

Now this has already been entirely too long (and honestly I’m kind of feeling how I did when I started this blog in 2010 lul) but lemme say this: Thanks guys, I had a whole lot of fun. And if I do end up leaving sometime in the maybe not to distant future know that I will always be lurking around somewhere on the internet, and I had the best time while I was here. I wish nothing but the best for all of you, and may we all be able to remain a happy and dysfunctional little group, if not here, somewhere much better.

[hpconsentfest]

Weekly Roundup 1

Hey All! Here’s our first HD Consent Fest Weekly Roundup! If you’ve missed some of the works as they’ve been released, here’s the list of what was posted this week. 

Thanks to all the creators, (cheer)readers, and commenters for getting the fest of to a cracking start! <3

ART:

Title: Suits and Serenity Artist: Anonymous Prompt: 3: One works as a public defender, the other works for the prosecutor’s office. The sparks fly both in and out of the courtroom. # 3 Rating: PG Warnings/Content Notes: Established married relationship Summary: “You looked hot out there today.” “Don’t I always?” “Mhm, can I kiss you now?” "I thought you’d never ask” Medium: Digital Art Artist’s Notes: So, I decided not to go with explicitly showing what they do after Harry attains Draco’s consent, because I felt it would take away from the essence of the art. My vision is to show that even after years of their marriage, Harry and Draco still ask for each other’s consent. They look comfortable in the drawing due to an established relationship, but that doesn’t mean that it would stop them from asking each other’s permission before just kissing. Thank you to the mods for arranging such a wonderful fest! It truly has been a pleasure!

Suits and Serenity

FIC:

Title: Start a Revolution (From My Bed) Author: Anonymous Prompt: # 54 Rating: T Warnings/Content Notes: Eighth Year, Coming of Age, Pining, Humour, Persons of Colour Hermione Granger and Harry Potter, Supportive Ron Weasley, Friendship, Open/Hopeful Ending, Sexism, Racism, Very Brief Mention of Past Abortion, Gender Studies, Party, Alcohol, Breakfast, Jam, Footnotes, Crafts Summary: Harry’s coming of age starts at breakfast. A peek into the lives of the Eighth Years as they become bona fide feminists over jam and croquet. Featuring the fear of growing apart, Blur and a pink cravat. Word Count: 29755 Author’s Notes: The title is taken from ‘Don’t Look Back in Anger’ by Oasis. Many thanks to the mods, my alpha and my betas. This couldn’t have happened without you.

Start a Revolution (From My Bed)

Title: Cold Like Fire Author: Anonymous Prompt: Draco giving a “Consent is Sexy” training at the Ministry after there had been problems with witches and wizards being harassed. Draco using Harry to demonstrate ways to ask for consent? Rating: Mature Warnings/Content Notes: Discussions of consent theory, reference to rape in theory only Summary: Head Auror, Harry Potter, had no problem with mandatory consent training for his team. He’d actually been looking forward to it, that is until he discovered who the teacher was. Now, he had no idea how he was going to get through the training without throwing a hex at Draco Malfoy. Or a punch. Word Count: 12k Author’s Notes: Love to my beta BB.

Cold Like Fire

Title: A Gift for Draco Author: Anonymous Prompt: #66 - When Harry can’t think of a Valentines present for Draco, he teams up with budding photographer Pansy Parkinson to take nudes (the photos can only be seen by the person who gave them and the person they’re given to) all over Hogwarts to surprise his boyfriend. # 66 Rating: Explicit Warnings/Content Notes: No Warnings Apply Summary:Though their new relationship is going well, both Harry and Draco have trouble communicating and are holding back from taking things to the next level–both emotionally and sexually. When Harry decides he is ready for more, he stumbles over how to start the conversation, but figures out a plan with the help of his friends. He comes up with the perfect Valentine’s Day gift to show Draco trust, commitment, and desire: sexy pictures of his naked arse. Thankfully, Pansy Parkinson has a camera and is willing to help… Word Count: 33,492 Author’s Notes: Huge thank you to the Mods for this awesome, positive sexy Consent Fest! It was a lot of fun to explore themes of consent, changing boundaries, and finding creative ways to communicate consent in a relationship. Many thanks to my beta, D, who fixed typos, workshopped dialogue, and squished a bunch of ramblings into a story with a theme. Disclaimer - I don’t own them.

A Gift for Draco

Title: When Nightmares Lead to Day Dreams Author: Anonymous Prompt: #22 Rating: Explicit Warning/Content Notes: No archive warnings apply Summary: Harry Potter didn’t want to return to Hogwarts for 8th year, concerned that the castle held too many terrible memories. Lacking any other plan, though, he agreed. He soon discovered how right AND how wrong he was. Word Count: 9,231 Author’s Notes: First, I want to thank the ConsentFest Mods for pulling this incredibly timely and important fest together. I also want to applaud their patience with a newbie like me who doesn’t know time management if it blocked my schedule itself. The prompts for this fest were beyond amazing and I had such a hard time narrowing down the selection. I only hope I have been able to please my prompter and help explore ideas of consent. Secondly, I literally would not be half the writer I am without my amazing, selfless Betas that came together and spent their weekend working with me. To C and G - you are my literal baby angels and I am so happy we have been able to connect over this crazy, intoxicating world of Harry Potter Fanfic!

When Nightmares Lead to Day Dreams

Title: I Don’t Want This to Be a Mistake Author: Anonymous Prompt: # 49 Rating: Explicit Warnings/Content Notes: Lots of sexual tension, professor!Harry, Father!Draco Summary: Consent can be tricky when Harry is Scorpius’ professor. Word Count: 5500 Author’s Notes: A big thanks to my beta, L!

I Don’t Want This to Be a Mistake

Title: Treat Your Body Like A Temple Author: Anonymous Prompt: Whether it be for kissing, touching, or sucking, Harry’s gotten into the habit of breathing, “May I?” against Draco’s skin. #20 Rating: mature Warnings/Content Notes: No Archive Warnings Apply Summary: It hadn’t been easy, and it hadn’t been fast, but after many years Harry had finally gained Draco’s trust. Now he woke up next to him every day, and he knew just the way to show the Slytherin how grateful he was for that. Word Count: 1707 Author’s Notes: Beta-read by the wonderful MM (thank you love<3). This was my first attempt at smut, so I do hope it was somewhat decent. It was great fun to write this, especially for this amazing fest. Consent is such an important subject, and it should get more attention. I hope I did that in this ficlet. Great thank you to the mods of the fest why reminded my dumb ass to submit this after I sort-of completly forgot, whoops.

Treat Your Body Like A Temple

Title: Bloody Tease Author: Anonymous Prompt: # 50 - Harry gives consent loudly and with delicious details, but somehow Draco just isn’t convinced. (Or basically Draco teases Harry mercilessly). Rating: E Warnings/Content Notes: Explicit sexual content Summary: Draco wants to be sure that Harry is willing. Very, very sure. Word Count: 1433 Author’s Notes: Thank you to s for the beta on this fic.

Bloody Tease

Title: Have Me Then Author: Anonymous Prompt: OWN Rating: NC-17 Warnings/Content Notes: unenthusiastic consensual sex between Draco and another character (detailed in the notes before the fic on AO3, explaining this tag better), infidelity, Female Draco, Canon What Canon, Alive Sirius, Cousin Incest (heavily implied, not visual), Misogyny, Slut Shaming By Another Character Summary: In Draco’s world, women are expected to be demure, non-lusting creatures. They are expected to be devoted while their husbands cater to base desires with women of the evening. All passions they are permitted lie between dusty, well-worn pages of romance novels. Draco doesn’t want to be that woman, but as she spends her days—unfulfilled—in the arms of a boring lover she dreams of more. Potter is so much more than she could imagine. Word Count: 3,632 Author’s Notes: Decided to do before for a brief warning. Draco consents to sleep with Theo, but when they are together she clearly is unenthusiastic and fulfilling a duty. This might be traumatic for some. I did not write it with the intention of dubious consent and K my beta, and one of the mods of the fest, assured me it was within the bounds of the fest. It was written to showcase how she wants better than what she is getting with him. The idea of consent that I tried to work with was that Draco has been raised in shame and Harry is patient with her, asking her to voice what she wants from/with him—as explicitly as she can. It is supposed to be a woman finding her own agency in sex, and knowing that it is okay to want more and not settling for anything less. IDK if it came across like that, I kinda wrote it in two days since I had a lot going on and forgot I had a deadline. It was definitely intended to be longer.

Tagged “Always A Girl” because I kept getting traffic on a thing and some DM’s asking for a continuation. This ISN’T a continuation but *jazz hands* more Female Draco.

Have Me Then

Title: A Hag, a Hex, a Tale of Redemption Author: Anonymous Prompt: # 58 Rating: E Warnings/Content Notes: Fuck or die, hags, curses, wandcraft, wandmaker Harry Potter, Muggle life, clubbing, tattoos, mild recreational drug use, angst, falling in love, getting together, kiss consent, safe sex, anal sex, oral sex, non-penetrative sex, switching, minor Ron/Hermione Summary: A fuck-or-die fairytale in which Draco Malfoy lives a despicable and unapologetic life — that is, until he’s cursed to die unless he can fall in love with and fuck Harry Potter. Word Count: 43,345 Author’s Notes: Huge thanks to the crew—you know who you are.

A Hag, a Hex, a Tale of Redemption

[copperbora]

Concept Writing - Kit at the Vet

Heyo, beautifuls! I thought I’d share this piece, which is a concept for a maybe future story. Note that there’s certain elements which I’m not happy with - wolves are so overdone in shape shifting genre - but it’s still a great start and I hope that you enjoy it. 

Kit at the Vet By Rosanna P. Brost October 26th 2017

A kind, animal loving woman is sobbing. She has brown eyes, curly black hair and her husband is as bald as a baseball, with a voluminous moustache capable of winning best in show in any facial hair competition. He sits with one arm around her, consoling her and using his other hand to pet the strawberry blonde and grey dog laying at their feet. Despite the blood matted in the dog’s fur on one hind leg, it appears to be mildly annoyed, as does the receptionist who is sitting at the clinic’s counter. The waiting room is painted a soothing green, the floor is honeyed wood and the dog is really wishing that she could do something about the leash in the lady’s hand, which is so inconveniently attached to her neck, which the man won’t stop touching.

The dog is me and I am not a dog at all but a wolf but I’m also not that either, because I am actually Aurora Peters, Homo sapiens. These schmucks who have brought me in to Pleasant Hill Veterinary Practice are just two more in an annoyingly long line of idiots who apparently can’t read the ‘if found injured, please admit to hospital, not vet’ tag on my collar, or my name, or my mom’s phone number or even my home address. Instead, they’ve all taken me to the vet and it’s only stupid luck that there is only one veterinary practice in town for them to come to. Everyone here knows me, right down to the Russian Blue greeter cat, who has just come to say hi, but Jacob Hars, my well-meaning benefactor, rudely shoos her away. Luna gives a dissatisfied brrrt and wanders off, tail waving in the air, passing Doctor Hank Johnson as he steps out with a clip board. I meet his eyes and we share a moment of shared disgruntlement, then he greets my benefactors, the Hars, who tearily declare the usual.

“Doctor, we think she was hit by a car -”

“Her owners should know better than to let her roam!”

“There’s no name on her collar at all -”

“Doctor, if her people don’t want her, we’ll take her! She’s a beautiful animal!”

“I am truly grateful for your concern for this animal, Mister and Missus Hars,” says Hank charitably, “but I assure you, Kit has a good home and we have her on record. She’s just got a nasty little habit of jumping fences, that’s all.”

The Hars gasp and complain a bit more, but eventually Hank chivvies them out, the receptionist Tanja assuring them that they really do know me, then Hank pulls me into the back room with one of the clinic’s leashes. The moment that we’re through the door and out of sight of the waiting room he unclips the leash from my collar and glares at me. Despite the fact that he’s one tall dude, colour me uninspired - after all, there’s rainbow tabby cats all over his scrubs and he wears a bowtie decorated with paw prints. Plus, he’s like family to me, almost a second father; we even celebrate Christmas together every year and I gave him a birthday present just last week. (An obnoxiously lurid set of new scrubs, of course.)

“Kitsune, you gotta stop getting yourself into so much trouble,” says Hank crossly. “What’d you even do to yourself, girl?”

With some effort, because doing so opposes my current cute ‘n fluffy form, I speak, “I got caught in a barbed wire fence. It was rather against letting me continue on my merry way.”

He rolls his eyes. “You know, there are safer ways of practicing your bloody shape shifting! Couldn’t you have waited for shutzhund tomorrow?”

Ahh, shutzhund. Some girls have volleyball, some girls have jogging and then there’s freaks like me who compete in the lovely German dog sport of mauling guys in heavily padded protective suits - as a dog. My team mate is even a real dog, Hank’s champion Russian bred German Shepherd Vlad, (who, if you’re wondering, does indeed kick my ass at Shutzhund.) Hank got me into it because he figured that since I insist on moving around on all fours and pretending more or less to be canine, I needed to learn how to defend myself that way. Thus far, it has helped me learn how to bark convincingly, which has proven incredibly entertaining.

“Work was so boring, I needed to go out for a run,” I say, extending my hind leg and wincing at the shallow gash in it. “Good thing I’ve had my tetanus shot, eh?”

“Aurora Peters, what season is it?” demands Hank, crossing his arms.

“Fall…?” I say, cocking my head to signal my what-are-you-getting-at because honestly I have no idea why he is asking this dumb question.

“Yes, it’s Fall - hunting season, Aurora! The time of year when a bunch of idiots with guns who don’t know a deer from a shadow are running around our fields and forests looking for wildlife to put bullets in! And what are you, currently, woman?” he snarks. 

I glance at myself, then bare my teeth in a smirk which I have been perfecting in front of my mirror. “Gorgeous.”

Hank looks heavenward, as if asking God for help with bettering my youthful lack of brain cells. “A wolf! And if they don’t mistake you for a wolf, which lots of idiots hate, they’ll mistake you for a bloody flaming coyote, which people hate even more! Do you want a bullet in your brain, woman? ‘cus I can’t fix that!”

He likes calling me ‘woman’ - it’s as if he’s trying to remind me that I am actually a human, a fact which I am quite painfully aware of, thank you. 

“Not particularly,” I say, “but I wasn’t really in a field -”

“It don’t matter!” snaps Hank. “Kitsune, you gotta stay in town right now! And wear a bloody reflective vest, you ninny - emulate dog instead of arrooo.”

I sniff, “I wear it when I am hiking, but I need someone to put it on for me and I was alone, so -”

“Couldn’t you have stopped by here? Or gotten Rick, anybody to put it on for you?”

I look at him blankly, silently admitting: this would have been smart.

“But I’m alone tonight, so how the heck would I get it off afterwards?” I ask shrewdly.

Cue another eye roll. “You come by here and I’d take it off for you, you know I’m here for another hour. Kit, why can’t you have a weekday hobby? Why do you have to spend every spare minute you have running naked around town?”

He’s right, actually; if I were to transform right now, I would be naked, a fact which many townspeople have witnessed, thanks to the first time that I was hit by a bicycle (bikes are my nemesis) and the good Samaritan cyclist tried to help me. When I spoke up to say that I had just been stunned and was fine, the cyclist had fainted. Me, being kind of an idiot, had transformed back to perform CPR if needed, thinking they were in cardiac arrest - and at that moment, a long line of kindergartners had walked past the park where we were with their teacher on the way to the pool, the kids discovering quite abruptly what boobs look like. I had been unable to concentrate enough to change back, so I had ran streaking for home, only for my embarrassment to become truly complete by the police officer who had stopped by to write me a ticket for public indecency that evening. It had not ended there - for weeks I had had the parents of the kindergartners being terribly rude to me and that was about the time when I opted to spend the rest of my secondary education at home. 

“Well, since you were dumb and forgot to bring by another set of clothes for circumstances like this from the last time that you swore you wouldn’t show up here like this, you can spend the rest of my shift hanging out with Vlad until I can drive you home,” determined Hank and he herded me into his office, where Vlad was quite happy to slobber all over my face. Tail clamped between my hindquarters to thwart Vlad’s mundane yet cherished canine hobby of butt sniffing, I turned back to the door, just as Hank was about to shut it. His eyebrows shunted low over his dark eyes and I nervously laid back my ears.

“Y’know, Kit, someday this shape shifting nonsense is going to get you into some real trouble, and I might not be there to help,” said Hank and with these forbidding words, he walks off, cheerfully calling a greeting to his next, real patient.

Unfortunately, he repeats this warning in some format every time I end up at his clinic on four legs - after all, that’s how we first met - so I don’t really listen to him. Instead, I proceed to horse around with Vlad.

Like an idiot.

[evalocity]

Can you say something nice about mutuals you've interacted with who you think are closest to you? Can be as many as you wish, it's time to spread positivity😊😊

This is a wonderful idea boo, thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to do this :) 

(it might be a bit long lmao here we go!)

@the-fierce-fangirl Ria, you were my first tumblr friend on here, in March 2018 we’ll have known each other for a year now ! I knew no one on here when we met, you reblogging my post was ?? a blessing ! someone noticed me ! and we started to talk, and you’ve been the purest and sweetest friend I could ask for. My birthday present ? That you freaking sent me ? I don’t deserve you. I just...there’s no words dear friend, to tell you how much you mean to me ;-; One day I’ll come to Poland and we’ll have tones of fun ! xoxo

@jasonblossomsghost Or, I remember when we first started talking. I was shy at first, but you seemed sweet, and honestly bless those swedish fish for starting our friendship. You’ve always been such a good friend, one that I don’t need to talk to 24/7 to know I can count on, and one that I’ve always wanted to defend because oh my god why are people in Kansas so annoying lmao. You’ve educated me on subjects that I knew nothing about and you’ve been there for me in dark moments, and I’m so so grateful. xoxo

@sapphic-spook Rose, you’re an amazing human. Idk if I could handle your aura irl, because just online you are such a ray of sunshine. You’re so nice and wise, your words can calm me down and make me feel better like no others can. Hell the apocalypse could me happening and you’d tell me to chill and I would :’) nah I think you’d know better than to tell me that x) but seriously, you’re amazing, and I just need to thank you for handling my panic attacks like the boss you are. I hope you’re happy, whenever I think of you I’m sending you tones of positive vibes because that’s what you deserve. xoxo

@addcolortomysky Em, it’s been a while since we’ve talked ! But that doesn’t mater, whenever I do an ask game I remember how much you love those and I tag you because making you happy makes me happy. Thank you for sharing my crazy interests, sharing them with you was hilarious ! I miss you, sorry for sucking at staying in contact :’) xoxo

@crazyreader1899 Hi Matata ! We’re mutuals and it’s been a freaking while since we’ve talked (I suck, I know). But nevertheless ! You know that meme where a guy is standing in an empty auditorium and waves and the text says something along the lines “me at that mutuals who likes all of my posts” well every time I see it on my dash, I think of you. Seeing you in my notifications always make me smile because you’ve kept up with my shit for so long now ?? You’re great, thank you, ily. xoxo

@izzyd03 Izzy !! You’re such a sweet human you know that ? I feel like I don’t do enough to let you know how much I appreciate you caring about me, like when you’d wish me good luck on my finals because you’d remember when they were ?? I’ve cherished those good lucks my dude, you’re such a good friend. Also your Instagram ? On point girl, you’re beautiful, you go. xoxo

@sugasugahanihani Bia ! Babe omg ;-; First of all, I want to apologize to you for being the worst™ and never keeping up with texting you I honestly don’t know what’s wrong with me but please never doubt how much I care about you because you are !! the best !! I’m so dumb Idk how to express this friendship, you just mean so much ? You are so freaking sweet and I can rant to you and I can talk to you and you’re always there like omg I do not deserve you girl, you’re such a blessing. xoxo

@mr-bushido Hi boo ! We’ve been mutuals for hum a freaking while ?? I wanted to take a minute to thank you because you’ve actually helped me discover a bunch of k-pop groups and songs ! You’re a sweet mutual and I enjoy your blog very much. I hope you’ll have an amazing year 2018 :) xoxo

@yoonminfaketexts Hii ! I absolutely love your blog omg :’) I feel dumb rn because we don’t know each other but ! We’re mutuals and I really appreciate what you post so thank you for making me smile you’re not unnoticed xoxo 

@moonlightkth Bel !! Can we take a second to bless your fake texts because 1. They’re amazing 2. Without them I wouldn’t have known you ;-; Sharing BTS and Got7 with you ? An accomplishment™. I consider you like a little sister and I hope you know you can always count on me. xoxo

@nooowestayandgetcaught Hi Rie ! First, it’s been a while since we’ve talked I’m such a mess, but I wanted you to remember how great I always thought your writing was, as an author you’ve been an inspiration and I’m so proud of you ! Plus, you’ve educated me on some stuff, always being respectful and kind. Thank you so much. xoxo

@clap-your-hands-yo Kensley ! My fave NCT blog ;) and one of my fave blogs actually ! You’re hum so freaking talented ?? Like honestly when God made you he dropped all the damn Talent™ bottle Istg :’) When I think about you, I know it’s stupid but the first word that comes to mind if “perfection”. I’m proud of you for your grades, for the work you’re putting in learning my language, for being so sweet, for being you. xoxo

@lovingyoongi Hopi !! Babe ! I’m so glad everything is going well for you in Korea, oh my god. We’ve always simply shared our love for BTS together, but I really care about you and man, your happiness is mine ok ? Have a blast in Seoul, you deserve it all. xoxo

@emmcfrxst Pasc :) Idk if I should talk to you in French or English ? That’s kinda awkward :’) OH WELL. You are such a sweet human omg, always taking the time to make people feel better, always being so considerate, always trying to fight against problematic stuff to create a safe space for your followers. You’re awesome ! xoxo

@mintysugasweet Rae ! You’re a new friend, but you’re a friend I’ve liked immediately. You are so so nice ! Texting you has made my days better, would it be by sharing my theories with your (amazing, incredible, awesome, breathtaking) au, simply talking about our mutual interests or learning more about your experiences in Korea. I don’t remember how I’ve discovered your blog but the least I can say is that I’m so thankful I did. xoxo

@exoverdosed Chelsea !!! My fave blog on this hellsite omg ;-; Idk what to say without getting emo just thank you for being so great ? Your blog lets me keep up with our Kings, and your tags make it the funniest thing ever. I can always count on you for moral support and to help my clueless ass about what’s going on in the k-pop world. Ily, ot9 rule and yass you’re cool keep up being you. xoxo

@sugahobiby Lune, it’s been a while since we remade, I remember our first interaction being me trying to send you positive vibes because you were stressing out about uni. Look at you now ! I hope you know you can count on me to help you in all the ways I humanly can, would it just be someone to talk to. Also I live for your snapchat stories lmao it’s a blessing :’) xoxo

@noona-clock Hi you two ! I wanted to thank you for all your great reactions and fics, I always enjoy reading them they’re soft and really great ! You seem so nice and I hope you both have an amazing year 2018 :) xoxo

@baekphia Sophia, I’ve been following you for a while and when we became mutuals I was SO freaking happy ! You’re nice, you’re so much fun and it reflects in your blog that I enjoy a LOT. Have an amazing year 2018 filled with your best friends (EXO), your mutuals and followers, your sister and Bakehyun with his possible new album !! xoxo

@minnie-rocker-xx Hi boo ! We haven’t spoken that much because idk if you’ve guessed but I’m a MESS at keeping up but you seem so nice already omg ! Why don’t you send me a message detailing all of your interests so we can talk about them ? I’d love to know you more :) xoxo

@softminmin Tila, mY GIRL. It all began when I was just a casual fan of your fake texts, and then you noticed me and I proudly became your cheerleader™ (I still am btw no one is taking that spot.) ! And now we’re friends and omg Ilysm. It’s like we don’t have to force any conversations we just naturally connect. I feel like a copycat lmao because your feelings and your thoughts are the same as mine ? It feels so great to be able to share with you, honestly everyone deserves someone like you babe. Good luck on your finals, I know you can do it ! xoxo 

IT TOOK ME A FREAKING WHILE, and I hope I didn’t forget anyone !! I love you so much, not just my mutuals but all my followers and all the ones that I follow ! THANK YOU ANON XOXO