#I'm trying to tag trigger warnings
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something that's been weighing on my mind ever since learning about the situation with ezra / toonimal is seeing how these predators will take the active hostility that is frequently directed towards minors in online spaces to their advantage and use it to prey on vulnerable children. i think that we as adults in online fandom should probably come together and maybe rethink the language / manner we go about interacting with kids bc clearly the way things are rn is causing active harm.
like obviously, if you're an adult and aren't comfortable with minors interacting with you or your content, you should be allowed to set that boundary and should be vocal about it, ( especially if the content you create isn't safe for them to consume. ) but i don't think talking to them like they're a blight on all that is good and holy is the way to go about it. maybe just saying you're an 18 plus account will suffice, you don't have to tell them to fuck off.
#i'm opening myself up for ppl to leave the stupidest takes on this post but whatever i need to get this off my mind#before anyone says anything about the kids on that website. they're grooming victims. they're literally kids being taken advantage of#show them some fucking kindness and be understanding that they're the victims in this situation#idk what it is about becoming an adult that causes so many ppl to lose their empathy towards minors it's weird#like yeah kids can be annoying and pushy on online spaces sometimes but a lot of them are old enough to know online etiquette lbr#alot of us were annoying kids on the internet at some point we should understand that you don't just. get a handbook for how to act online#that's shit you learn overtime but ppl seem to forget that#they also seem to forget that talking down to kids isn't gonna teach them shit they're not gonna listen to you if you treat them like idiots#what i'm trying to say is that we really need to talk to minors more respectfully and maybe give them a little grace#( obviously there will be situations where some of them need to be yanked up by the collar but there's ways to go about that >>>#without treating them like shit )#these kids need to know that there's spaces for them to be online safely without having to stumble into places that'll pray on them#we all know how much it sucked to be a kid online we should want better for the ones coming in after us ya know#sorry if this comes across as preachy it just breaks my heart and boils me blood to see kids being taken advantage of like this#especially when there's ways to prevent it idk#how do i even tag this....#mj.txt#there's trigger warning on the linked post btw#tw csa mention
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fyi i am about to post a terror gifset in 30 min that has a graphic gif in it soooo if you don't want to see it i'd encourage you to blacklist the tags #tw: blood #tw: mutilation #tw: death #tw: gore #tw: body horror
#fyi#i always try to add trigger warning tags but if you ever feel like i'm missing one or should add one let me know
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Impartial Hearts | Sylus - Part Two
Pairing -> Boss Sylus x Non MC Reader
Parts -> Part One | Part Two
Synopsis -> You’ve been working as Onychinus’s accountant for two years, and you’ve been carrying two heavy secrets for a third of it. You were in love with your boss, and your mother was dying.
A/N -> I'm sorry it took so long. I have been obsessing over trying to make part two perfect but I don't think I can. It's time I share my baby with you, and I really hope you enjoy it.
Tags -> Angst, fluff :)
Trigger Warnings -> Character death, heavily mentions grief. Some parts are suggestive but there is no smut.
Word Count -> 18.8K (it got kinda crazy)
Late October
It was cold, dark and gloomy; the weather a perfect pathetic fallacy to the narrative of your life. The freshly disturbed patch of grass failed to convey the significance of who laid underneath it. It was vexing, how the world continued to spin on it’s axis despite the fact that it stopped spinning for you.
It hurt to think about the events that led to your undoing. The weeks prior to the moment your mother drew her last breath. You were a cracked vase filled with wilting flowers and overflowing regret. Every breath you took consumed more energy than you could spare and yet the world just. Kept. Spinning.
“I brought you flowers. Yellow tulips, by the way.” The words felt like lead on your tongue. It was one thing to accept your mother was never coming back, it was another to try to act normal about it. “I know you never cared for them, but I didn’t think leaving a pack of cigarettes on your grave was very tasteful.” You bitterly smiled to yourself at the memories of your mom sneaking a cigarette in the backyard when she thought you were asleep. It was a nasty habit you did everything to rid her of. A fruitless attempt to protect her from the inevitable.
“I’m sorry I haven’t figured out your epitaph yet. It’s just so hard to condense your entire life into a few words. Plus, they charge by the letter, so I’m trying to be really selective.” It felt weird, speaking into empty space, but you read online that it helped with grief, so you tried anyway.
That was how you approached most things nowadays. Eating, drinking, sleeping, they all seemed meaningless. But, you knew you couldn’t survive on just antagonism and mourning, so you did it anyway.
“Zayne called again. I know you told me not to hate him and that it wasn’t his fault, but I can’t bring myself to agree.”
The moment Zayne told you that the heart that could save your mother’s life was going to someone else replayed in your mind like a scratched vinyl stuck on an aggravating note.
“I got so frustrated by his constant calls that I threw my phone into the ocean.” You let out a sad laugh. “Guess that’s the last time I bring anything with me when I’m walking along the coast.”
You paused for a moment, feeling stupid. But you had so much to say to her, it all just began spilling out.
“I know you don’t want to hear this, but I might lose the house. I burned through all my paid leave, and the idea of going back to work for Sylus makes me want to put my head through a wood-chipper. I know I have to, but how can I focus on work when I have nothing left to work for?” You tasted the tears before you felt them, the saltiness reminded you of your weekends at the beach with your mom. You did everything to get out of joining her, you hated the beach, but it was her favourite place to be and in a desperate attempt to cling on to whatever was left of her, you forced it to be yours too.
“I’m sorry I never got you that house you dreamed of, or the dog. I’m sure there are lots of dogs in heaven, and at least the dogs there have been screened. With my luck any dog I would’ve gotten you would’ve been evil.” You teetered around the grievance you truly wanted to apologise for.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t spend much time with you before you passed away. I was so sure you would get the transplant. I tried so hard to save for it. I should’ve been with you. If I knew—” The sobs raked through you with a force that knocked the air out of your lungs. You sat down next to her tombstone, leaning your head against the chiseled rock.
There were moments when you’d wake up, and in the haze of your muddled mind you’d forget she was dead. But then the ache in your body is deciphered by your mind, and you’re reminded of just how much you’ve lost. Maybe that’s why they called it mourning. Grief dawned on you like the rising sun.
Life had a way of being entirely unfair, and there was nowhere to hide from fate’s piercing claws. And as if to ensure you hadn’t forgotten just how cruel life could be, your head whipped around at the sound of footsteps behind you to find the last person you wanted to see.
Sylus was dressed in a long black coat hanging effortlessly off of his broad shoulders, a black dress shirt that really should’ve been buttoned up to the top, and a pair of black slacks that made his long legs look impossibly longer. He looked every bit the cunning grim reaper, and it wasn’t just because he was surrounded by graves.
“I didn’t know you were back in the N109 Zone.” The words came out harsher than you intended as your head returned to it’s position against the rock.
Sylus stopped in front of you, lowering himself to his haunches so that you would be face-to-face. It stung to look at him, so you focused on picking at the grass instead.
“I only got back a few hours ago. I heard about your mother. I’m sorry.” Having been deprived of his voice for over a month, you cursed the butterflies that coursed through you like muscle memory. Part of you wished he’d returned disfigured, but you knew it wouldn’t have made much of a difference. Ugly or devastatingly beautiful, the storm that was Sylus could not be stopped, only weathered.
“Sorry that she died or sorry that you weren’t there?” The bitterness in your tone was unfamiliar to you. Even though you knew it was unfair of you to expect him to have stayed, he left immediately after he dropped you off at the hospital and you hoped he’d have been there just a little longer. It didn’t help that you didn’t hear from him until two weeks later, and by then you were too engrossed in your battle against Akso hospital’s medical board to respond.
“You haven’t been answering my calls; they’re not even going through anymore. You haven’t blocked me, have you?” Sylus countered your question with one of his own. If you cared enough, you might’ve called him out on his diversion.
“No, my phone broke.” That was an understatement if there ever was one.
“How long ago?”
“A week.” That much was true and since you couldn’t afford a smart phone, a shitty $30 flip phone weighed down your pocket.
“And all the times I called before then?” Sylus’s eyes perused you with intensity, and you suddenly felt self-conscious. You weren’t dressed well, in a pair of black sweatpants that were too big on you and a matching hoodie. Grieving people were allowed to dress terribly without judgement, Y/N. It’s okay.
“I didn’t feel like picking up.” The grass continued to bare the brunt of your nerves as you answered. The you that wasn’t effectively an orphan would’ve made up some excuse to protect his feelings, but you were resolved to change that. Your mother was strong, independent, and she never backed down from a fight. Not against men like Sylus, and not against her illness. If you wanted to honour her memory then you had to live your life the way she’d want you to.
“Do you have a phone now?”
You reached into the pocket of your sweatpants to take out the grey flip phone. You watched as Sylus bit back a laugh.
“I’ll get you a new one.”
“I don’t need you to get me anything.” You quickly retorted.
“You’re going to need a phone from this century if you’re working for me, Y/N.” He said it so casually, as if you were put on this earth solely to serve him as his accountant.
“Right, about that…” Your determination to be confident and unapologetic began to dwindle as you wondered how to tell Sylus you needed more time.
“No. Resigning is not an option.” Twelve minutes. It took Sylus twelve minutes to return to his usual controlling self. You were impressed, truly, it was a new record after all.
“We don’t have a blood pact, Sylus. I can resign if I want to. Besides, that’s not what I was going to say. I need more time off.” You didn’t sound very convincing, but it wasn’t like you could change who you were overnight. It would take a lifetime to unlearn your bad habits.
Sylus looked conflicted, as if he didn’t know what to say. When he chose to finally open his mouth, you wished he hadn’t.
“I’ve given you a month, Y/N. That’s enough.” His statement came out so matter-of-factly, you wondered if you had imagined it. A month was not nearly enough to recover from losing your mom, but you figured a man who killed people for a living wouldn’t understand.
“It’s only been two weeks since she died. And I’m sure the temp you’ve got is perfectly competent.”
“The temp doesn’t know the company like you do and I haven’t bothered teaching him on the premise that you were returning. If you’re not back soon I can’t promise you’ll have a job to come back to.”
The tension in the air dissipated as you began to laugh. Loudly. Obnoxiously. Hysterically.
“You— You seriously think I care whether or not I have a job? I can barely will myself to eat right now—employment is not my priority.” You wiped back the tears that began to spill out. Their origin unknown, between your hysteria and sorrow, your eyes were constantly puffy.
“People die all the time, sweetheart. It’s no reason to throw your future away.” Sylus stood up straight at the end of his statement, holding his hand out to you.
The angel on your shoulder whispered that in his own peculiar way, this was his attempt at comforting you. But you stopped listening to that angel when they buried your mom under six-feet of dirt, and you couldn’t help the word vomit that escaped you like water barrelling out of a splintered dam.
You pushed away his hand, and stood up to look at him with a ferocity you didn’t know you possessed.
“I get that something really dark and twisted must have happened in your youth to make you so heartless, but most people have shitty childhoods, sweetheart. We choose not to be terrible, insufferable people because of it.” The unbridled rage you’d spend so long trying to suppress seeped out of you uncontrollably as you screamed at Sylus. You walked toward him, your anger taking hold of you as you began to push him away. A few months ago you would’ve given anything to touch him, now all you cared about was making him feel a semblance of the pain he instilled in you.
“Some of us choose to feel our emotions in their entirety, regardless of how much it hurts, because we’re not scared to love and lose. You’re a coward, Sylus and you may think that my mother dying is just an inevitable consequence of life, but my world will never be the same.” In an attempt to calm down, you took a deep breath.
“You can judge me all you want, but it won’t change the fact that when you die, no one will mourn you.” The word vomit continued, and when you saw the hurt flash briefly within his eyes, you felt the arms of regret begin to sink their claws into you.
You shouldn’t have said that. It wasn’t you.
But before you could take it all back, Sylus’s phone began ringing and you figured from the urgency in which he answered it must’ve been her.
“I lost track of time, I’ll be right there.” He spoke in a low voice in what you could only assume was an attempt to mask the fact that he was leaving you for something more important, again.
He opened his mouth to speak, but you beat him to it.
“Just go.” You waved him off and turned back around to face your mother’s grave, though now the tears welling up in your eyes couldn’t be entirely attributed to the grief.
Early November
You weren’t sure time could heal the gaping wound your mother’s passing left behind, but grief had settled into your life like an imposing aunt. It was in your home, touching your things, ruining your food, and never once leaving you alone. It didn’t feel so all-consuming anymore, but it clung onto you constantly like a shadow.
You were watching the third Harry Potter movie at 8am when you received the eviction notice via Email. You’d been expecting it, ultimately you were behind on rent, but the reason plastered on the paper was exponentially worse than your own incompetence.
…Selling to developers…suburban expansion project…
As if losing your childhood home wasn’t bad enough, they were planning on destroying it. Memories were bound to decay with time, that was an inevitable consequence of being human. Sooner or later you’d forget the way your mom dressed, or the smell of her perfume. Tangible things like photographs, places, they kept those memories anchored. You couldn’t lose the house, it wasn’t an option.
You spent the next hour trying to reason with your landlord over the phone, but he was committed to selling. He rejected every single one of your proposals, though even you knew they were weak at best. The developers were offering significantly more than market value, there was no way you could beat that. Stupid gentrification. But, your landlord told you he was sympathetic, and the deal hadn’t been finalised just yet. If you could match the developer’s offer by the end of the month, he’d gladly sell it to you instead.
Of course the developer’s offer was $800,000, and by the looks of your financials, you were about $796,312 short.
Desperate for a catharsis for your unending frustration, you screamed into the throw pillow on your couch until your throat felt raw. Then, you opened up your laptop to figure out a plan.
30 minutes later you had:
Sell your kidney to an organ broker and use the money to get a loan from any dodgy bank that would accept your mediocre credit score.
Dabble briefly in prostitution and use the money to get a loan from any dodgy bank that would accept your mediocre credit score.
Become a squatter and protest the demolition of your home environmental-activist style.
“Wow, Y/N. Graduated top of your class and this was all you could come up with, huh?” You muttered to yourself as you stared at the list of terrible ideas. Your mind hadn’t come up with something so horrific since the bed-in-breakfast Mother’s Day fiasco when you were 11.
The only option that didn’t end in bodily harm or a prison sentence was to work as many jobs as humanly possible for the next few weeks in hopes you could somehow manage to accumulate the deposit for a loan. You could probably sell some appliances too, and maybe revisit the kidney idea if it came to it.
Despite it being a long-shot, you had to try. You changed into a pair of flared leggings and a sweater. It was basic and borderline mismatched but traversing your explosive closet was a large undertaking you tended to avoid. You dug a copy of your old resume out from your file drawer, after all, it wasn’t like your experience as Onychinus’s accountant was going to do you any good. Further, listing Sylus as a reference would ensure you never got a job again.
You figured the easiest place to start was the central district of the N109 zone, bars and restaurants there were constantly hiring and from what you’d heard their only requirement was that you had two functioning legs and arms. But when you tried to leave through the door to begin the job search you collided with a formidable wall.
Since when was there a—
“Where you headed to, Y/N?” The familiar voice was so surprising it made you jump, the action accompanied by a shrill scream.
“What the fuck? Why are you just standing outside my door?” You rarely ever swore and you were sure that if your mother was still alive she’d throw her shoe at you for using the devil’s language. But of all the things you expected to see that morning, Sylus outside your door was not one of them.
“Is that any way to welcome your old employer?” Sylus stepped into your home without an invitation. Conclusive proof against your theory that he was secretly a vampire.
“What are you doing here?” You asked again, still staring at Sylus like he sprouted a second head. You couldn’t think of a single reason why he’d show up at your place of residence, he never did while you were still his employee.
“I need you to come back.” You choked back a laugh at his ridiculous request. Was he insane?
“Go to hell.” Your vicious response didn’t sway Sylus.
“I’ve fired an accountant every week since you left. The accounts are in complete disarray, half my businesses are behind on their bills, the other half have been paying the wrong amounts to the wrong companies. My investors are unhappy, my debtors are one week away from assuming I’ve gone bankrupt and I haven’t slept in weeks. Come. Back.” While it stroked your ego to hear that the organisation was suffering in your absence, you couldn’t just forget the terrible way he’d treated you in and out of the workplace.
“You insisted I was especially replaceable and now you’re saying you can’t replace me?” You chose to remind him of just how horrid of an employer he was, an action he didn’t appreciate.
“If you’re going to dwell on the semantics I’d rather just cut to the chase. What’s it going to take to get you back?” Sylus’s tone suggested he was truly trying to negotiate with you. Of course a man like him didn’t know how to take no for an answer.
“Pigs to fly.” You quipped, opening your door in hopes he’d get the hint and leave.
“Y/N, I’m serious. We can’t survive without you.” His desperation went straight to your head, but you stood your ground.
“Then die.” You tried to shove him out of your doorway, but he was about as easy to move as a truck.
“Everyone has something they desire, sweetheart. Name your price.” While you were ready to fire up a quick retort, his suggestion reminded you of the very reason you were about to leave the house.
Perhaps this was a sign; you could swallow your pride if it meant you got to keep your home.
You pretended to give it thought, sighing loudly in contemplation. “Fine. I want a sign-on bonus. Or in this case, a re-sign-on bonus, I guess…” You trailed off, unsure if he would agree.
“Alright, how much?” He was quick to accept your terms, and you decided to test the waters of just how desperate he was for your return.
“A million dollars.”
“Done.”
Dammit, you should’ve asked for more.
“I want a personal driver too, I’m sick of biking to work.” You would’ve been okay with just the bonus, after all, it was insanely generous. But you’d be a fool not to milk this opportunity for what it was worth.
“Anything else, princess?” The condescending nickname only added fuel to the fire as you fired off more requests.
“I don’t want to share my office with the twins anymore, they’re loud and annoying and they have no respect for the sanctity of my monthly budgets.”
“Okay.”
You masked your shock at his sudden magnanimity. “One last thing. Since you’ve come to the realisation that I am, in fact, a valuable asset to your organisation, you’re not allowed to be a dick to me anymore.”
“Elaborate.”
“No more calling me stupid or other degrading insults, threatening my job security, threatening my life — just no more threats in general — and if you’re going to assign me extra work that is beyond the scope of my job description, a please and thank you would be nice.”
“You’re pushing it, Y/N.” Of course treating his employees like human beings was the most difficult request.
“You just agreed to give me a million dollars and being nice to me is where you draw the line?”
Sylus sighed, deliberating in silence for a moment. When he saw that your resolve was unrelenting, he begrudgingly agreed. He wasn’t sure where your newfound confidence was coming from, but he would be lying if he said he didn’t find it the slightest bit attractive.
“Alright, you’ve made your case. I’ll agree to your conditions. Now, please fix it.”
It took every fibre of your being not to break out into song and dance at your victory. “Let me get my coat.”
______________
You stared at the horrific mess your beautiful spreadsheet had turned in to. This was a disaster. A colossal, unfathomable disaster. “How could you let it get this bad?” Your voice was dripping with fear, it was like staring a train wreck.
“It wasn’t like it happened on purpose. Besides, if you’d never—” Sylus interrupted his own sentence which you were sure contained an insult, and you could almost hear the evil chuckle resounding in your head at the sight of his obedience. This was going to be fun.
“This is going to take forever to fix.” It would actually only take the day, but you didn’t need to tell him that.
“I need it fixed by the end of the week. Please.” He looked pained as he added the nicety. Soooooo much fun.
“Add on a massage chair for my office and I’ll get it done by Wednesday.” You wondered just how far you could push his desperation.
“Deal.” He held his hand out for you to shake and when you did, you felt a strange sense of accomplishment. Now you could tell people ‘How to Tame Your Dragon’ was loosely based on your life.
“You know, Sylus, I’m liking this new dynamic.” Your shit-eating grin couldn’t be wiped off of your face no matter how hard you tried.
“Oh I can tell. Now, get to work.” Sylus made a show of pulling out your office chair for you, and when you sat in it for the first time in two months, you felt an overwhelming sense of nostalgia. And for once, the recollection of your past didn’t hurt as much as it usually did.
Mid-November
This time around, your employment under Sylus was much more pleasant. Surprisingly, he’d actually adhered to your conditions.
The twins were slightly offended that you no longer wanted to share your office with them, but their gratefulness for your return trumped any antagonism they had for you. You were kind of a celebrity in Onychinus’s executive team, their saviour, if you will.
But, the enjoyment of your newly established status could not be savoured. Undoing months of mistakes was turning out to be positively exhausting. You were an accountant; socially awkward, stuck to her Excel sheets, spent most of her free time indulging in shitty rom-coms. You were not built for briefing CEOs, Chairmen, investors, subsidiaries and of course, debtors, on your commitment to stability via video call.
Sylus insisted it had to be you, even though he usually handled the bureaucratic part of the organisation. Something about him not being able to answer their questions regarding the numbers. You told him you would tell him what to say through an ear piece like a spy movie, but he responded with a resounding no.
It was more like ‘hell will freeze over before I turn into a glorified puppet, Y/N, blah blah blah’.
Every single one-on-one conference call made you feel like you were getting hives. Not to mention the active effort it took you to refrain from making stupid jokes at every opportunity. When the last one with the representative from Onychinus’s main bank was over, you had officially smoothed over all bad blood between Onychinus and it’s stakeholders.
Giving yourself a moment to recalibrate from the sheer amount of social interaction you had been subjected to, you glared at the shared calendar event. ‘Miss Hunter’s Birthday in 13 days’.
You tried to distract yourself from that familiar sinking feeling in your gut with your work. Sylus never remembered your birthday, but it wasn’t like it mattered. You were his accountant, he was your boss. That was the extent of your relationship, even though you’d both said things to each other that would cause your HR department, if you had one, to self-emulate. But in the chaos of buying your home, going back to work and learning how to navigate life with your unwanted companion; grief, you’d forgotten all about your feelings for Sylus.
They weren’t gone but they were muted, like a voice screaming out to you while your head was underwater. Most of the time they were easy to ignore, but in times like these they were too loud to overlook.
You couldn’t dwell on your self-pity for long because there was a knock at your door. No one ever knocked on your door, people just tended to barge in.
“Come in?” Confusion dripped from your voice. When the door opened to a pair of twins with shameful smiles, you knew they were about to ask you for a favour.
“We… fucked up.” Three words you never wanted to hear coming out of either Luke or Kieran’s mouth.
“What have you done?”
“Long story short. Boss sent us to pick up a gem for Miss Hunter’s birthday. It’s really rare. The man who owns them is this older, heart of gold type old guy who refuses to sell to nefarious people because of his outdated principles. He wouldn’t give it to us, said something about us being part of Onychinus. We knew if boss didn’t get this gem today he’d have our heads displayed on mantels in his office, so we threatened the old man with a gun and then an entire arsenal of security appeared out of thin air and we were blacklisted from the property.” Kieran’s explanation left you astounded.
The twins had their fair share of asinine mistakes, but this one might have taken the cake.
“You threatened an old man with a gun…”
“Yes.” Kieran responded.
“Over a gem?” You asked in disbelief.
“A very rare gem!” Luke corrected.
“Huh. How am I supposed to help?” It was a genuine question, you didn’t really see a way out of this one.
“Can you go and convince the old man to sell the gem to you?” Kieran’s request made your eyes widen in protest.
“No way! I’ve had my fill of uncomfortable business meetings.” And wasn’t that the truth. If you had to see one more man in a business suit ask you ‘if you even knew what you were talking about’ you might throw your laptop into the first body of water you could find.
“Please, Y/N. Sylus will kill us. Do you want our deaths to hang over your conscience?”
Luke’s question was an innocent hyperbole, but at the mention of deaths hanging over your conscience, you were reminded of your mom. Your face dropped, your fingers slowly forgetting what they were supposed to type. Kieran, the more observant twin, elbowed Luke.
“Fuck, Y/N. I’m sorry, I forgot.”
“No, no, it’s fine. You don’t have to walk on eggshells around me, I’m not going to burst into tears.” You weren’t sure that was true quite yet, but fake it till you make it, right?
“Will you help us? Please. We’ll owe you big time.” The line was clearly rehearsed since they said it in unison, or maybe it was some weird twin telepathy thing. Either way, it freaked you out so much you agreed.
“Fine, what’s the address?”
_____________
You knocked on the large wooden door of a beautiful home. It was classically designed, a perfect intersection between modernity and the timeless complexity of archaic house designs. It was rare to see homes like these in a society that prided itself on progress.
When you heard the sound of soft feet shuffling toward the door, you felt the guilt eat at you internally. You were tricking an old man into selling a gem to people he very reasonably did not want to sell to.
“Y/M/N?”
Did he— why did he call you by your mother’s name?
“That was my mother, I’m her daughter, Y/N.”
“Oh, thank god, I was beginning to think I’d finally lost it. Come in, come in.”
Your interest had been piqued, and you forgot all about the gem as you entered the old man’s home.
“I must say, I’m surprised you’re here. Did your mother send you?”
You swallowed the lump in your throat. “She passed away just over a month ago.”
“Oh god. I’m so sorry, dear. Are you alright?” The question was filled with so much warmth it made tears well up in your eyes. Your mother never had any friends, and you were estranged from your extended family. You were all alone in your grief, and hearing someone who knew your mom in some capacity ask you if you were alright felt bittersweet.
“Yeah. I’m doing okay. If you don’t mind me asking, how did you know her?”
“You don’t know? I figured that was why you were here.”
Right. The reason you were here, the gem.
“No, I’m actually here entirely coincidentally, I came to acquire a gem.”
“Which gem were you after, dear?” He asked the question as he looked around his living room for something.
“The Painite one.”
He stopped pacing and turned to you with an accusatory stare. “This wouldn’t happen to be related to those two rowdy boys who came by earlier, right?”
“Well…” You couldn’t lie to him. He looked like the old man from ‘Up’, it was entirely unfair.
“I’m afraid I can’t sell to you. I’m concerned you’ve even gotten yourself wrapped up in such a terrible organisation.” He shook his head, his disappointment evident in his tone.
“Look, I know what you’ve heard, but most of the rumours you hear about Onychinus don’t have a modicum of truth to them.”
“Then why hasn’t your boss cleared them up?” A great question.
“In this business its good to have a reputation that instills fear in others. You’ve seen what people do for Protocores and black-market items. Onychinus serves as a… regulatory body of the underworld, the only people they harm are those that harm others.” The practiced speech came from years of listening to Sylus give it to yourself and others.
“I don’t know dear, I’ve heard some horrific things about their leader, Sylus.” You were probably responsible for a few of those rumours…
“The only horrific thing about him is his sharp tongue. Seriously, he has a way of finding your worst insecurity and then using it to drag you through the dirt.” Recognising the unhelpful tangent, you digressed.
“But when it comes to business, he’s fair and when someone hurts the people he cares about, he’s merciless. He has a good heart, it’s just encased under a very thick layer of stone.” When he didn’t look convinced, you continued.
“In fact, he wants this gem for a woman. She’s special to him and its her birthday in a few days. She’s a hunter, by the way, she saves lives. So, even if you don’t want to sell to Sylus because he’s probably half demon, you should sell it to her. You know, by proxy.” The argument was a stretch but you couldn’t help your rambling.
“You are the spitting image of your mother.”
The comment caught you off-guard.
“You think so?”
“I knew your mother when she was your age. She used to sing live at a bar I frequented with my friends. It was a simpler time, before wanderers attacked. I was head over heels in love with her, and I knew she felt the same way about me. But, she got wrapped up with the wrong guy, a real bad man, and it took finding out she was pregnant with you to break it off with him.” He recounted his past as he continued to search his drawers for something, when he came back to the couch in front of yours, he handed you a photo.
It was of your mother, except she was much younger. She was on a stage performing, a part of her life she never told you about. She looked happy and was glowing with the kind of ethereal beauty that never dwindled with time. He was right, you looked a lot like her.
“Can I keep this?” You looked up at the man, and he gave you a small nod.
“Of course. You know, I offered to help her when I found out, said I’d raise the baby as my own, but she told me I was destined for more than she could give me. Said she had to do this on her own. She was stubborn but she loved boundlessly, Y/N, just like you.”
You were confused, this man hadn’t known you for very long, how could he know such a thing? “What do you mean?”
“I don’t know what that Sylus man has done to deserve your adoration, but I can tell you love him. And for you to come here on his behalf to convince me to sell him the rarest gem in the world for another woman? You truly do have your mother’s heart.”
His words sprouted doubt and introspection. Why were you trying so hard to get Sylus such a romantic gift when it was meant for someone else? Were you secretly a masochist?
“If it’s alright with you Y/N, I’d love to get to know you. Your mother was my first love, and it’s nice to have someone to talk to about her.”
You gave him the sincerest smile you could come up with. “I’d like that. I don’t really have anyone to talk to about her either.”
“As for the gem, I’ll sell it to you but only if you promise to love a man who will go to these lengths for you, not someone else.”
“I promise.” You’d promise to try, at least. You told the man, who you now knew was Dr Jeffery Hunt the geologist, that you needed to get back to work. You exchanged contact information with a promise to catch up later and trade stories about your mom.
You left the house with the rarest gem in the world in one hand, and an infinitely more valuable picture of your mother in the other.
___________
You walked toward your office where Luke and Kieran should have been to find the door slightly ajar. You stopped just outside the door when you heard Sylus’s voice from inside your office.
“You sent Y/N to get the gem? Was the task too difficult for the two of you?” You tried to sympathise with the twins, but it was kind of funny to see Sylus berate someone else for once.
“The owner said he wouldn’t sell to Onychinus—” Kieran’s attempt at an explanation was shot down instantly.
“So you pick some random person off the street and send them in instead. You don’t send the girl the gem is for to go retrieve her own present. You have completely ruined the surprise.”
Wait, what?
“No, it’s fine, we sent Y/N not Miss Hunter.”
“Miss Hun— why would you assume it’s for her?” The question hung in there for an uncomfortable moment, after all you assumed the same thing.
“Her birthday’s in a few days.” Luke timidly added.
“How do you know that?”
“It’s in the shared calendar.”
“Fuck.”
With your ear plastered shamelessly against the door, you smiled to yourself. He had a bad habit of putting personal events in the shared calendar.
“The gem was for Y/N. Thanks to you imbeciles I have to figure something else out.”
Why was the gem for you? Was it poisonous? You started down at the velvet box in your hand and wondered if the gem was secretly a teeny tiny bomb.
“Is it Y/N’s birthday soon too?” Kieran’s question offended you. Your birthday was in March and both he and Luke were at your celebratory birthday dinner last year.
“No, that’s in March. It’s to celebrate her 3rd year with Onychinus. Although now I’m wondering if your time here has come to an end.” It was kind of sadistic, but it was comforting to know that Sylus threatened other people’s job security over minor inconveniences too.
“No! Please, we promise we’ll make it up to you.”
You stopped listening to the conversation as you opened the box in your hand. The gem glistened under the artificial lights as questions fired off in your brain. He wanted to give this gem to you? How did he even remember the day you started at Onychinus? And he knew your birthday?
Before you could search for the answers, the sound of footsteps approaching the door made you panic. You tried fruitlessly to escape the long hallway but Sylus stormed out before you could.
“I um, got that gem for you.” You pretended you weren’t eavesdropping and held the gem out to him, but he pushed it back toward you.
“Thanks. I was going to have it turned into a necklace, but since the cat’s out of the bag, you can decide what to do with it.” He clearly knew you’d heard everything and gave the twins a pointed glare as they scurried out of your office.
“It’s really too much. Most employers get their employees a gift card or something.” You tried to hand it back again, but he was unrelenting.
“I’m not most employers, and you definitely aren’t most employees.” The loaded compliment made you bite back a smile.
“In that case, a necklace would be nice. I have a photo of my mom when she was my age, she wore a necklace with a similar looking gem. Do you think you could find someone who can copy the design? It would mean a lot. I’d pay for it, of course.” You kept the photo in your wallet now, it quickly became one of your favourites. When you passed the photo to him, he looked at it for far longer than necessary.
“Consider it done, and your money’s no good with me. Save it for something else.” He paused for a moment, took a photo of the necklace on his phone and returned the photograph. “I see where you get your beauty from.” The comment was so nonchalant and inconsistent with Sylus’s usual dialogue that you were left speechless. Your heart battered against your ribcage as if it were trying to escape and mount itself onto him instead. Traitorous organ.
You watched him turn around and walk toward his office. The sight of him walking away from you brought back memories of that day in the graveyard and what you’d said to Sylus before he left.
“You can judge me all you want, but it won’t change the fact that when you die, no one will mourn you.”
The guilt was eating away at your conscience, and you knew you had to let him know that you didn’t mean what you said. Especially not now.
“Sylus, wait.” He stopped just as his hand reached the doorknob of his office door and looked up at you expectantly.
You raked your mind for the right thing to say, and Sylus didn’t make a sound as you prolonged the silence.
“If you died, I’d mourn you.” And you meant it. You maintained eye contact despite the urge to look away from his intense gaze in an attempt to convey your sincerity.
He shook his head with a slight chuckle in response, and walked into his office wordlessly.
You figured he hadn’t given what you said a second thought. It was foolish to think you could ever hurt the impenetrable Sylus’s feelings. You weren’t even sure he had feelings.
But, unbeknownst to you, when Sylus closed the door behind him, he felt himself let out a breath that alleviated a pressure in his chest he didn’t know he’d been carrying. What you’d said to him in the graveyard weighed on him like an uncomfortable tumour.
Sylus knew you were right, but the idea of no one caring for him never bothered him before, not until you said it. It dawned on him that the only person who’s idea of him actually affected how he thought of himself was yours.
Late-November
“Finish up, we have a reservation at six.” At the sound of your boss’s voice, you looked up from your computer screen. Your eyes were watery from staring at the ledger for hours but you still couldn’t reconcile the $15.70 that was missing. It was driving you insane.
“Was there a meeting I forgot existed?” The calendar looked empty from where it stood on your second monitor. Well, it was empty now that Sylus deleted the shared calendar event for Miss Hunter’s birthday which should’ve been yesterday.
“No, it’s just us. I’m taking you to dinner. Now hurry up.” You couldn’t help the frown on your face. There was surely an ulterior motive.
“Taking me to dinner? Are you asking me out on a date?” You were teasing; hell would freeze over before Sylus would ask anyone out on a date. Though, maybe he already had, after all he was busy yesterday…
“Don’t be ridiculous. We’re celebrating your third year with Onychinus. As an employer I believe rewarding long-term employees can strengthen their loyalty to the company.” He regurgitated the words like they were toxic.
“You stole that from the last issue of Forbes magazine. I would know since I was the one who gave you the article.” It was titled ‘Ten foolproof ways to make your employees like you’ and you thought it would be funny to leave it on Sylus’s desk.
“And I’m responding to your feedback like number 4 on that list suggested. Now, do you want to go to this dinner or should I ask someone else?”
You quickly scrambled out of your seat, you couldn’t miss out on a chance to see Sylus actively try to be a regular boss. Who could say no to dinner and a show?
“No, no, I’ll go.” You grabbed your bag off of the floor and followed Sylus out of the building. You asked him a series of questions about where you were going, when you’d be back, if you were getting paid for the time you were forced to spend with him, but he answered none of them.
Sylus was driving for all of 2 minutes before you began to draft an appreciation letter to the inventor of seatbelts in your head.
“You know, you may be harder to kill than a regular person, but I will die if you crash this car.” Pleading for your life in an expensive sports car was not how you expected to go.
“It’s a little early in the night for your theatrics, Y/N.” Sylus’s deadpan tone did nothing to soothe your concerns as he turned yet another sharp corner with aggressive speed.
“It’s also a little early in my life to die.” You unhelpfully added.
“Relax, will you? I’ve never crashed before.”
Well, there’s a first time for everything. You thought as you tightly gripped the handle of the door. You found yourself suddenly missing the middle-aged man who would grouchily drive you to and from work. At least he drove like he valued his life.
_______
When you arrived to the place in one piece you felt severely under dressed. Sylus was wearing his regular attire, a suit without the tie, and you were dressed in linen pants and a turtleneck. Sylus never enforced a business dress code, though in that moment you found yourself wishing he did.
The restaurant was multi-level and sat at the top of a mountain. The exterior screamed affluence and you were sure everyone who dined there was in a different tax-bracket. Sylus reserved a table on the rooftop which unfortunately meant you had to ascend four levels in your mediocre outfit that made you stick out like a sore thumb.
When you eventually reached your table, you quickly hid in your seat. While it was unrealistic to assume anyone would pay you any attention but your embarrassment was usually irrational. Nor, did it help that Sylus naturally made heads turn wherever he went. He was freakishly tall and unnervingly handsome; next to him anyone struggled to look attractive.
“You’re in a rush. Hungry?” Sylus asked across from you as you buried your face in the menu. You didn’t feel like explaining how being out with him made you feel insecure, so you forewent a response.
The waiter quickly returned with a bottle of wine. Of course Sylus’s favourite wine was known universally. Why wouldn’t it be? He practically ruled the N109 Zone.
“Thanks, she’ll have a mojito.” Before you could tell the waiter not to bring you your favourite cocktail, he was gone.
“I’m not drinking.” Your protest fell on deaf ears. “Drinking with your boss is like number 1 on the list of things you shouldn’t do if you value your job.”
“You don’t have to worry about embarrassing yourself in front of me, Y/N. You’ve done that plenty of times sober.” Sylus smirked as he made the dry joke and you held back the urge to step on his foot under the table.
Never mind. You needed a drink pronto.
“Asshole.” You muttered under your breath.
“What was that?”
“Artichokes! I said the artichoke salad looks good.” You could tell Sylus wasn’t convinced, but he dropped the matter anyway.
“Order whatever you’d like.”
“There’s no prices on the menu.” You flipped it around every which way but not a single price appeared.
“Sweetheart, the people who can afford to dine here aren’t too concerned with prices. Don’t worry and order what you wish.”
Aw, how sweet. Sylus thought you enquired about the prices because you were concerned about overspending. As if. You knew that man’s financials inside and out, if anything, you wanted to order the most expensive things on the menu.
“Jeez, my bad Mr One-Percent.” Your joke was not well received.
“Can we have one night without your incessant sarcasm?” The plea sounded genuine, but it was denied.
“We could, but that’s no fun.”
“I find you painfully unfunny, Y/N.” You smiled to yourself at his blatant lie. Everyone found you funny.
Before you could think of a retort, Sylus pulled out a large velvet box and slid it toward you on the table.
“What’s this?”
“The necklace.”
You opened it up eagerly and the sight of it brought pure bliss to your heart. It was exactly like the one your mother wore, and it was even more beautiful in person.
“It’s perfect. Thank you.” Feeling slightly remorseful for your attitude prior to the gift-exchange, you gave him a sheepish smile.
Sylus watched you lift it up to put it on, but quickly interjected. “Allow me.” He stood up, walking toward your seat. Flushed, you clumsily turned around so your back was facing him. You felt goosebumps on your skin when his cold hands bunched your hair away from your neck, the tips of his fingers leaving a trail of wired nerves in their wake.
You took your hair from his hand to hold it up, the mere feeling of your fingers brushing his gave you heart palpitations. The act was way too intimate, and despite how it good it felt to have him so close, your brain knew it was safest to pray it would be over soon.
When Sylus was done he spun you around to face him and shamelessly observed his handiwork. “It looks good.” Your brain short-circuited the moment your eyes met his, so you sat in front of him in complete silence.
The moment was rudely interrupted by the sound of a familiar voice.
“Sylus? Y/N? Fancy seeing you here!” You both turned to the source of the voice to see Miss Hunter in a beautiful baby blue gown. As if you didn’t feel bad enough about your choice in attire. You began to smile until you noticed that the arm linked with hers belonged to your mortal enemy. Dr Zayne.
You got up to greet them, despite your primal urge to push Zayne off the roof, but Sylus beat you to it. “Miss Hunter, always a pleasure.” You tried not to gag at the sight of Sylus being so gentlemanly. It became particularly hard when he kissed the top of her hand.
“I didn’t know you knew Dr Zayne.” The comment slipped out of Sylus’s tense smile with a twinge of what you thought was hostility. Was he jealous that she was with Dr Zayne? Were you jealous that he was jealous? Are you in a soap opera?
“Oh, he’s a childhood friend andmy doctor! I’m very lucky. How do you know him?” Before you could whisper to Sylus to make up some excuse, he was firing off information about your personal life to the last two people you wanted to discuss your personal life with.
“He was Y/N’s mother’s doctor.” Everyone went tense, everyone except for Miss Hunter, of course.
Your eyes followed her as she turned to you, praying she wouldn’t ask about your mother’s health. Instead, she praised your nemesis. “He’s brilliant, isn’t he?”
You wanted to scream in protest. You wanted to swing a chair into Dr Zayne’s head, and then use the broken scraps to beat him to a pulp. But you opted to force a painful smile instead.
“He’s definitely something.” You looked right at Zayne, hoping he’d understand the implications of your backhanded compliment.
“Well, we were just here to celebrate my birthday yesterday, but the hostess said it was all booked out and silly Zayne forgot to make a reservation. We just came up to the rooftop to get some pictures, but you guys should enjoy your dinner!” Miss Hunter’s polite dismissal was the perfect opportunity to end the painfully awkward interaction and move on with your night.
“Thanks.” You were about to return to your seat when Sylus decided to continue with his commitment to ruining your life.
“You guys should join us, the more the merrier, right Y/N?”
The question you had no idea how to answer only poked at the jar of pent up murderous rage you were trying to suppress. It wasn’t like you were subtle about your hatred for the Doctor, why the hell was Sylus inviting them to stay?
“Right.” You couldn’t have sounded less sincere if you tried, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care. You had to focus on making it out of this building without a homicide charge.
When Miss Hunter happily agreed, Sylus quickly waved down a waiter and made them transform your two-seater table into a four-seater. Unfortunately for you, the seating arrangements somehow ended up with you next to Zayne and Sylus next to Miss Hunter .
Zayne could feel the hostility radiating off of you in waves, but he was too scared to do anything about it.
“Happy birthday, by the way.” You offered Miss Hunter the nicety, since she was really the only innocent person at the table. Your unfounded hatred for her took the back-burner when Zayne was around.
“Thanks, Y/N. I love your necklace, where did you get it?” Yet another question you didn’t know how to answer. If this was how the entire night was going to be you might as well cut your losses and take your chances with jumping off the roof.
“It’s um, custom made.” You avoided Sylus’s glare.
“Well it’s beautiful.” You couldn’t help but smile at her compliment. Her sunshine-y attitude could rival yours.
“Sylus knows the guy who made it, I’m sure he could get one for you too.” You glanced at him only to see him quirk an eyebrow at your response. Was he seriously mad? You were practically the world’s greatest wingwoman.
When Miss Hunter turned to look at him, he quickly shut her down. “He retired right after making that piece, actually. Something about getting arthritis.”
He was definitely lying. You weren’t sure why he was gatekeeping this jeweller and you never got the chance to ask.
“Oh, that’s unfortunate. Hey Zayne, you’ve been awfully quiet. Say something!” Miss Hunter gave him a playful push on the shoulder as she teased him. The sight would’ve been adorable if it weren’t for satan’s incarnate sitting inches away from you.
“Yeah Zayne, how was work? Steal anymore hearts lately?” You asked the deceivingly innocuous question while breaking apart a piece of bread. The double-entendre was like a secret you both shared; though the idea of sharing anything with that waste of space made you inscrutably angry.
Sylus silently observed the interaction with curiosity. Your passive-aggressiveness was a trait he thought you only reserved for him. You were always nice, to everyone. Seeing you treat Zayne so coldly was like witnessing a beaver play the piano. It was unnatural.
“Work went as well as expected.” Zayne’s clipped reply left no room for further discussion. The conversation came to do a lull, and you took it as the opportunity to excuse yourself to the bathroom. You immediately beelined away from the table that currently situated your nightmare blunt rotation and toward the women’s bathroom that was positively Zayne-free.
The bathroom was just as extravagant as the rest of the restaurant but you didn’t get to admire it before you splashed water on your face in an attempt to cool down. There was no way you could last an entire dinner next to Zayne. Maybe you could say you were feeling sick. Probably a bad idea when he’s a doctor. Work emergency wasn’t plausible, your boss was at the table. What if you just ran away? You could live with the shame and embarrassment.
You looked up at the ceiling and silently cursed the heavens for your terrible luck. Seriously, you must’ve been a serial killer in your past life to deserve this fate. It was a never-ending series of unfortunate events, and you were desperate for a break.
When you eventually left the bathroom, Zayne was standing right outside the door. He startled you, but the moment the shock wore off your face morphed into a deadly glare.
“Look, I know you think I’m a terrible person but—”
“Monster is the term I’d use, but go on.” You rudely interrupted Zayne. He chose not to acknowledge your comment.
“I rarely get to spend time with MC and I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t ruin her birthday dinner because of me.” It didn’t take long for you to realise that MC must’ve been Miss Hunter’s first name.
Zayne ruined everything he touched, he needed no help from you.
“I’m sorry, does the fact that I’m angry at you for letting my mother die put a damper in your dinner plans?”
“Yes it does, actually.” Zayne responded quickly. He either didn’t understand sarcasm or was an even bigger dick than you thought.
“Then might I suggest you take her someplace else. It’s your fault you couldn’t get a table here. Why should I have to suffer because your incompetence knows no bounds?” You couldn’t think of a time you’d insulted someone so much in such quick succession. Dr Zayne brought out the worst in you, but you could reflect on your actions later. Right now you were at war.
“We are perfectly capable of having an amicable dinner.”
You rolled your eyes at his condescending tone. “You might be, I’m not that mature.”
“Y/N. We’re both adults.” He pleaded.
“Bite me.”
Before Zayne could open his mouth again, Sylus interrupted.
“Everything all good here?” For once in your life, you were grateful for Sylus’s interruption.
“No.” You said.
“Yes.” Zayne also said, at the exact same time.
“Zayne you should head back to the table. Miss Hunter's waiting for you.” Zayne didn’t think twice before taking the out and you internally flipped off his retreating form.
Sylus grabbed you by the forearm, his grip tight as he dragged you to a secluded part of the rooftop and away from the bathrooms.
“What’s going on with you?” He asked the moment you stopped moving, his hand still gripping onto your arm like a vice.
“Can you let go? You’re hurting me.” He quickly released you, his eyes washing over with something you couldn’t recognise as you soothed the part he’d rubbed raw.
“Why are you acting so childish?” His question would've angered you had you not been angry already.
“I hate his guts.” The response did not help your case, but you weren’t very articulate when you were upset.
“What did he do to you?” Sylus’s eyes narrowed, and he spoke in a low tone that was laced with danger. You didn’t think too much of his strange reaction, Sylus acting strange was pretty much the only consistent thing in your life lately.
You gnawed on your lip, unsure of how to respond. Your grievance against the world-renowned doctor was one you’d always kept to yourself. After all, everyone had nothing but praise for the brilliant Dr Zayne.
“Y/N, if he touched you I’ll—” Your eyes quickly widened in shock at his interpretation.
“No! Nothing like that. It’s just, a few days before my mom died, a heart came in that was a match. But there was this other guy who was younger and needed it just as badly. The policy was that the hospital's medical board would vote on who got the heart and the entire board, Zayne included, unanimously agreed that the heart should go to the other guy.” They said it wasn't personal, that it had everything to do with survival rates, but there was no way to detach personhood from medicine.
You realised that when you said it out loud, your hate seemed unfounded. “I know it wasn’t entirely his fault, but he didn’t even try to give my mom a fighting chance. He didn't say anything to sway them, he just silently agreed. He was supposed to be her advocate.” The frustration began to boil over, and before you knew it there were tears welling up in your eyes.
“God, I spent every last dollar of my paycheque to make sure she got the greatest medical care money could buy. Everyone said he was the best, but when it really mattered, he did nothing for her. I was such an idiot.” There was an uncontrollable fountain of tears streaming down your face, and you were grateful for Sylus’s decision to drag you to somewhere secluded.
The familiar tendrils of an oncoming panic attack began to wash over you as you began to hyperventilate. No matter how much you wanted to blame Dr Zayne, or the universe, or your shitty luck, the only person you could really blame was yourself. You sent her to that hospital, you convinced her to hold on for a transplant, you spent her last months on this Earth slaving away in another city instead of by her side. There was no way to get that time back.
“Y/N, look at me. It’s not your fault.” Sylus’s voice was like a beacon of light that led you through the dark tunnel you were trapped in. He cradled your face in his hands, wiping away your tears as they continued to stream down your face. But when your tears showed no signs of slowing, he pulled you into his arms, his hands holding your tear-stricken face against his chest.
He ran his long fingers through your hair as he whispered everything you wanted to hear. "It’s not your fault. It’s okay to hate him. It will get easier."
You weren’t sure how long you spent with your face buried in his chest, but by the time you’d returned to reality, his white dress shirt was slightly transparent where your tears soaked through the material.
You laughed a little at the sight, and the corners of Sylus’s lips raised ever so slightly at the sound. When he saw you were okay, Sylus began to speak. “Don’t move. I’ll grab your bag and we’ll get out of here.”
Before he could leave you tugged on the sleeve of his suit jacket. “Hey, I’m sorry I ruined your dinner.” You truly were. Sylus did not deserve to be subjected to yet another one of your meltdowns, but he seemed to have a habit of being at the wrong place at the wrong time.
“No it's my fault, I ruined it by inviting them to join us. I promise I’ll make it up to you.” Sylus then manoeuvred through the restaurant toward the nightmare table. When he returned with your bag in one hand and the other outstretched toward you, your heart skipped a beat. Or two. He played the role of the knight-in-shining-armour quite seamlessly, and he looked every bit the handsome prince charming. You tried to remind yourself why it was so dangerous to be attracted to a force like Sylus, but when he smiled at you like you were the only two people in the room, all caution was thrown to the wind.
_____________
In the spirit of making things up to you, you made Sylus take you to a restaurant of your choosing. It was a hole-in-the-wall dumpling place that charged so little one would question if they were serving real meat. But you never found better dumplings, so you took the risk anyway.
The dynamic was completely subverted as you sat on the table that was slightly sticky with cheap cleaning chemicals. Sylus was the one who looked out of place, his suit was unarguably the most expensive thing in the room and it brought joy to your miserable night to see him out of his comfort zone.
“How did you find this place?” The question was warranted, other than you two, the only other occupants in the restaurant were a few middle-schoolers.
“I used to come here a lot with my friends in high school.”
“Did they all die from food poisoning?” Sylus seemed proud of his quick-witted joke. You gave him a pointed glare to convey just how unfunny that joke was.
“Funny, but no. We just drifted apart after we graduated.” The clipped reply shut down any further inquiry. You thought back to the fond memories you had in that restaurant. Things were different when you didn’t yet know the cost of failure; before you knew what you’d be losing. And while everyone may have moved on from this small town in the N109 Zone, you never left.
“Do you even have any friends?” You choked on your drink at the question. He was genuinely asking and the worst part was, you really didn’t.
Your constant struggle to make ends meet and maintain a high GPA for your academic scholarships made it impossible to have a social life. It didn’t help that you went to a college you couldn’t afford. It was hard to find people to relate to when everyone had grown up with silver spoons. Then after you graduated you landed at Onychinus, and it wasn’t exactly a friendly environment.
“Of course I have friends.” Your lie was a feeble attempt to preserve the last of your dignity. Sylus had seen you at your absolute worst, but there was something extremely dehumanising about letting him know you were insanely lonely.
“Really, who?” His genuine surprise only made your insecurity worse.
“You don’t have to sound so shocked. Plus, you wouldn’t know them.”
“Try me.” Of course he wouldn’t drop it. When has Sylus ever let something go?
“Well, there’s Mr Demir, and Luke and Kieran, and my newly acquired friend Dr Hunt.” In a desperate attempt to keep up your lie, you pretty much just named all the people you knew.
“Y/N, that’s the man who sells you your sandwiches, my assistants, and a geologist who sold you a gem.”
“Has anyone ever told you that no one likes a know-it-all?”
“I think you should get out more. Maybe tone down the sarcasm and you might just make a friend or two.” Your jaw-dropped in faux shock at his unsolicited advice.
“You’re one to talk, your best friend is a mechanical crow.” You snuck a dumpling off of his plate while he was distracted.
“I don’t need friends, they’re unnecessary burdens.” He took a swig of his beer. You thought he’d burst into flames if he drank anything other than red wine, but he adapted to his surroundings with little effort.
You put a hand on your heart as if in pain and jokingly gave him a solemn look.“Then why would you wish such a cruel fate onto me?”
“Because I hate seeing you this miserable, Y/N.” The amusement from your banter died a quick death at his confession. You thought you kept it together most of the time, though bawling your eyes out in the N109 Zone’s hottest restaurant probably didn’t do that facade any good. But for the most part, you handled the death of your mother relatively well.
“I’m not miserable. Not all of the time at least. Like right now, I’m only mildly annoyed!” You tried to change the topic the only way you knew how, with humour, but Sylus wasn’t budging.
“You take care of everyone but yourself and all it’s done is isolate you. There needs to be a give and take, sweetheart. People don’t like feeling useless.” He spoke to you softly, as if he was scared the timbre of his voice would cause you to shatter into a million pieces.
There was a sinking feeling in your stomach that followed his oddly specific guidance. He seemed to know more about you than you thought he did, and you were torn between feeling seen and feeling judged.
“That’s sound advice. Guess you’ve been reading more magazines.” You were grasping at straws, willing to try anything to get the unwanted spotlight off of your inadequacies.
“You also need to learn how to accept help without downplaying your problems.”
“Okay, okay. You sound like my mother. Has her soul possessed you?” There you go Y/N. Play the dead mom card, that’ll work.
He chuckled at your joke. You knew he found you funny.
“You don’t know when to quit, do you?”
“Yeah, the manufacturers didn’t include an off-switch. No refunds, sorry.” You stuffed a dumpling in your mouth as the tension subsided.
“Oh, I’m not returning you, sweetheart. They’ll have to pry you from my cold dead hands.” While you knew he was probably referring to the value you brought his company as his accountant, you couldn’t stifle the butterflies that wreaked havoc in your stomach.
You didn’t move when Sylus’s car stopped outside your house.
“Thanks for tonight, I had fun. Sorry it didn’t go to plan.” You turned to him after you unbuckled your seatbelt and the tight confines of the car felt even smaller.
“It’s fine, I liked this version of events better anyway.” His low voice reverberated through the small distance between you, nestling in your heart that was beating unhealthily fast.
“Me too. Next time you take a girl to dinner you ought to let her know if she’s supposed to dress like she’s going to the met gala.” Your advice had a bitter undertone because part of you still wished you could be the only girl he’d take to dinner.
“I usually do, but this particular girl doesn’t need a fancy dress to be the most beautiful girl in the room.” The candid compliment made the butterflies do summersaults, and while their gymnastics routine continued, you found yourself at a loss for words.
“Goodnight, Y/N.” Sylus leaned over the centre console and opened the door for you, completing the chivalrous act of opening the door for you in his own unique fashion. He was so close, all it would take was one small move and his lips could’ve been on yours.
“Goodnight.” You barely got the word out through the sudden bout of breathlessness you were experiencing. And when you were finally encased in the familiar four walls of your home, you thought about every moment you shared with Sylus and how different he seemed from the man you knew before.
The weekend passed by in a blur. The necklace that looked like a carbon copy of your mom’s was nestled on your neck. A permanent reminder that made ‘Operation Sylus: No More’ infinitely harder to achieve.
Perhaps you shouldn’t have asked him to stop being a dick, because what you thought would be an easy feat was beginning to feel like climbing a mountain with a peak you couldn’t even see.
You were staring at the list on your notes app on your brand new phone in hopes of searing it into your memory.
Operation Sylus: No More
The foolproof guide of getting rid of all feelings Sylus related by the end of November.
Step 1: avoid Sylus and all thoughts of him at all costs.
Step 2: no more funny jokes, his laugh is seriously deadly.
Step 3: force yourself to remember Miss Hunter in moments of weakness. She’s the one he really wants.
Step 4: try to find love elsewhere, like the corner shop owner, he may be in his 50s and happily married but he’s kind of a silver-fox!
Step 5: do not, under any circumstances, allow yourself to be alone with Sylus for too long.
You violated step 5 that Friday when you let him take you to dinner and you were reaping the consequences of your mistake. There was no way you could survive the free-fall if you couldn't get your heart to obey your mind. The disconnect between the two vital organs might be the thing that kills you.
When you heard something shatter in the hallway, you quickly put your phone down and went out to investigate.
The door opened to Mephisto standing on a side table where an empty vase used to sit. The vase was now on the floor in pieces in front of your feet.
“You did this on purpose.” You pointed an accusing finger at the bird, but all he did was tilt his head to the side as if he couldn’t understand you. You knew he could understand you perfectly well.
The cold war between you two started in your first week at Onychinus when he would swoop at your head spontaneously for no reason. Sylus told you he did it to everyone he didn’t trust and that he’d be over it in due time, but you were too vindictive to let it slide.
Several back-and-forth pranks later, the bird seemed to have remembered the tradition you managed to forget. “If this is your way of saying you miss me then you take an awful lot after your owner.” Your words faded as you made your way to the kitchen to find the broom. However, upon your return you saw that the floor was flawless and the door to your office was closed.
You rushed in with unparalleled speed to see your worst nightmare; Sylus leaning against your desk in his usual model-like fashion with your phone in his hand.
Panic coursed through you like never before as you remembered what had been left open on your phone when you set it down and the painful fact that you left it unlocked.
Prayers for a sinkhole to open up and consume you in that very moment went unanswered as Sylus looked up at you with a smirk on his face.
“Is my laugh really deadly?” He looked amused.
Come on sinkhole. Anytime now.
When you didn’t answer, Sylus moved toward you. When he was close enough to touch you, he leaned down to make sure your eyes were on his.
“Your deadline is fast approaching, Y/N. Care for a progress report?” The taunting question made heat rush to your face.
“It was stupid, I wrote it months ago.”
“Then why did you have it open?”
You couldn’t exactly tell him that his willingness to change his cold and cruel demeanour just to keep you as his accountant revived the feelings you thought were long dead. You definitely couldn’t tell him that the necklace that suddenly weighed down your chest made your heart skip a beat every time you touched it. And there was no way you were telling him that the dinner you shared was the happiest you’d felt in a long time.
“I was going to delete it when I heard Mephisto break something in the hallway.”
“Delete it? Guess you don’t need it anymore.”
“Nope.” You popped the P on the word for emphasis. “Can I have my phone back now?” He placed the device into your outstretched hand.
“So how do you feel about me now, sweetheart?”
You tried your best to appear unperturbed by his taunting. “Mad at your blatant violation of my privacy.”
“Forgive me. I saw my name on your phone when I went to check in on you and I was curious.”
“Mephisto told you I broke the vase, didn’t he?”
“Don’t deflect. Do you still have feelings for me?”
“No, they’re gone. Can we please drop this? It’s embarrassing.” You lied in favour of self-preservation and hoped he wouldn’t be able to see through your act.
“There’s nothing to be embarrassed about, Y/N. Many women confess their love for me every month.” You rolled your eyes at his ardent display of over-confidence and narcissism, though you knew he wasn’t exaggerating.
“Okay, brace yourself there bachelor. No one said anything about love.” It was true, you never said you loved him. Whether or not you did, well that was a secret you’d take to the grave.
“So then which feeling are we discussing?” The loaded question came out of his mouth so casually, like someone ordering a latte. A display of power that reminded you of just how little this mattered to him.
Your feet felt like they were grounded in their place by an invisible force and you were sure your cheeks were beet red. You knew your mouth was slightly agape in shock, but you couldn’t even close it. Meanwhile, Sylus was unfazed, treating your feelings like a game.
“Since when do you even care about how I feel?” The sudden outburst was accompanied by your hand running through your hair out of frustration.
Sylus’s jaw clenched and for a moment he said nothing. There was no hint of amusement left on his features.
“You think I don’t care about you?” He seemed irritated by the premise, but you couldn’t figure out why. You thought Sylus was proud of his clear disregard for other people’s emotions.
“You treated me like gum stuck to the bottom of your boot for years. What reason did you give me to think otherwise?”
“I don’t know, maybe the fact that I pay you more than my highest ranking footmen. Or that I had Mephisto tail you when you used to bike to and from work to make sure you got home safe. Hell, I invented the lunch budget when I hired you just to make sure you were eating— I even banned mushrooms from my kitchen in case you wanted to eat here. Not to mention the bullshit extra work I’d assign you just so you would stay longer.”
Choosing not to dwell on the implication of his silent acts of kindness, you interjected. “Hey, I took those tasks seriously!” The twins thought you were crazy when you asked if Sylus was making those assignments up. You knew you were right.
“Don’t interrupt me.” Your mouth clamped shut at his rather reasonable request. Sylus wasn’t a big talker, so when he monologued, it was important.
“Your kindness, your humour, it all caught me off guard. No one ever treated me like you did and I had no idea how to feel. The little doodles you sent back to me on the notes I left you delineating tasks? I kept every last one. When Mephisto complained to me about that time you put corn-starch in his water fountain and almost destroyed his wiring, all I could do was laugh. I treated you like I treated all my men because I didn’t want people to find out that you were my weakness.”
You swallowed the lump in your throat, but the pressure wasn’t budging. There was so much you didn’t know about Sylus, so much you completely misunderstood. This revelation caused a series of chain reactions to go off inside your brain and the weight of what he was trying to say felt suffocating.
You dreamed of a time where Sylus would reciprocate your feelings, but the reality of it was more daunting than you realised.
“All my threats are empty with you, Y/N. You’re the only one who gets away with the attitude you give me. You tell me you crashed a car worth over half-a-million dollars and all I could think about was if you were okay. I even offered to buy your house for way more than it was worth just to get you back. Do you seriously think I don’t care?”
All sound came to a stifling halt.
“Wait, you were the ‘developer’?”
The inklings of betrayal wove their way through your skin as the pieces began to fall into place. The timing of the eviction notice, the fact that he’d shown up at your house the day you received it, the way he was so quick to agree to the ridiculous bonus.
He manipulated you like a puppet on a string and let you think you were in control the entire time.
“Don’t look at me like I’m some traitor.” His audacious demand made your blood boil.
“You are a traitor! How could you do that to me?” You yelled.
“You were going to leave me like I was nothing!” For the first time since you’d met him, Sylus raised his voice to match yours. Your entire body went cold at his vulnerability. He was afraid of being abandoned, and that was a fear you both shared.
“Not seeing you every day made my heart feel like it was being ripped out of my chest. I could barely focus, all I could think about was what you were doing, who you were with. So imagine my surprise when I come to find that while I’m being tortured every minute I’m away from you, you needed more time.
“I knew I was being selfish, I knew that your grief had nothing to do with me, but I’ve never been good at putting my feelings into words. That day in the graveyard when you wouldn’t even look at me, I thought I’d lost you for good. It ate at me like a parasite. I had to get you back and I won’t apologise for not playing fair. There isn’t a rule I wouldn’t break for you, Y/N.”
It was hard to hate him for what he did when you understood where he was coming from. You were two sides of the same coin. While you overcompensated for the lack of love in your life by becoming the ultimate people-pleaser, he avoided it at every turn, saw it as a weakness. But at the core of every human being was an innate desire to be loved and an inherent fear of being abandoned.
People couldn’t leave your life if you never let them in. That was a philosophy you saw both your mother and Sylus live by. It was lonely and difficult, and if you had the power of hindsight you would’ve tried harder to convince your mother she was worthy of love. You couldn’t make that same mistake again.
You loved Sylus, that much was ingrained into the flesh of your heart. For all his rugged edges, he had a way of making things happen that was akin to magic. His determination, his grit, it was admirable.
His intelligence was infuriating, you couldn’t get anything past him. If he received the Greeks’ horse instead of the Trojans, you were sure he’d have seen right through their ruse.
His desire to make the N109 Zone a better place stemmed from a sense of altruism you could only hope to possess. And when Sylus did things for others, he never expected anything in return.
But for all his greatest traits he had some difficult ones too. He’d hurt you more times than you could count, and even if he’d changed drastically since your mother’s death, you couldn’t quite trust that he wouldn’t hurt you again.
“You already know how I feel about you.” You confessed. It was no secret you wore your heart on your sleeve, despite your mother’s constant reminders that the world was filled with terrible people who’d take advantage of your candour. You chose to see the good in others, it boded better than the grim lifestyle that came with perpetual pessimism.
“Then why are you fighting this?” His question came out pained, and it was one you could answer.
“I’ve loved you for a long time, Sylus. I loved you even though you insulted me, ignored me, reminded me I was replaceable every chance you got.
“I told myself it was just how you were, that it wasn’t personal. But when you walked out on me in the hospital when I needed you the most, I loved you a little less.”
Sylus felt an unfamiliar twinge in his chest, like someone took a needle to his heart. He left that hospital because he wasn’t sure you’d even want him there, and it pained him to see you so distraught over a problem he couldn’t fix. When MC came to him with an important mission in Skyhaven, he saw an out, and like the coward he was he took it. If he knew that you’d lose your mother while he was away, he never would have left your side.
“When you didn’t call until weeks later, when you showed up only to tell me I was being dramatic for grieving, I loved you even less. Every time you screwed me over you made it easier to live without you.”
It hurt to remember the pain you were in back then, the immense pressure of the burdens you carried. But if there was ever a chance of you and Sylus working out, he needed to know the truth.
“I’ve only ever loved two people, Sylus, and in one month it felt like I’d lost them both. I still love you, I’m afraid I couldn’t stop if I tried, but I don’t know if I can be more than your accountant right now.” You couldn’t survive another heartbreak, that much was for sure.
Even though Sylus looked like he was going to be sick, you continued.
“I thought I was okay with you treating me like everybody else, thought I was strong enough to take it. But when I saw you with Miss Hunter and the softness with which you spoke to her, it broke me. I saw that you were capable of being gentle. You just didn’t think I was a worthy recipient of your kindness.”
He was quick to correct you. “That’s not true, sweetheart. Not at all. She has something I need, something I can’t take with force. It’s why I’ve had to adopt unusual methods. If I’d known it was causing you so much pain I would’ve explained. Fuck, Y/N, you deserve so much more than just my kindness, more than I could ever give you. I can’t even think of a person on Earth who deserves you at all.”
When Sylus saw the tears begin to slide down your cheeks, he resisted the urge to wipe them away.
“I’ll give you anything you ask for, anything but letting you go. There’s nothing so broken it can’t be fixed, Y/N. You taught me that. Let me fix this.” He tested the waters by taking your hand in his and when you let him, he pulled you into his arms.
For a moment, the room was silent. You listened to his heartbeat through his chest and it might have been even faster than yours. It felt like deja vu, reminding you of that moment in the restaurant, or that time in his hallway after Zayne’s phone call. Sylus was there to comfort you more often than not, why were you so scared of letting him in?
“I want to believe you, I just don’t know that I can.” Your voice was small, timid. As if you were afraid something you’d say would shatter the sanctity of this moment and you’d find out it was all a dream.
“I won’t stop trying until you do, sweetheart. You’re it for me, there’s no one else.” He kissed the top of your head with a softness you didn’t know he possessed and the words were like bandages wrapping around the wounds inflicted by your own envy.
In the comfortable silence, Sylus made a vow. “I don’t have regrets — you know that quite well — but I regret the way I treated you. I’ll spend every lifetime repenting for my mistakes, Y/N, and I promise I’ll never let anything hurt you again.” He squeezed you tighter and the comfort his warmth brought you was a welcome change to the cold you lived in all the time.
Desperate to diffuse the overwhelming angst of the situation, you pulled away from his embrace and clapped your hands together. “Okay then, as of today we commence ‘Operation Sylus: The Redemption'.”
His loud laugh resounded through your office, and it was a sound you’d never get tired of hearing. He grabbed your chin. “Have you always been this corny?”
“I watch a lot of movies, okay? Now, shake on it.” You shook his hand off your face and held out your hand with an invitation that he instantly accepted. With his warm hand encasing yours, you whole-heartedly hoped this operation would be a success.
Late December
You assumed the dynamic between you and Sylus would drastically change following your impromptu heart-to-heart. But the changes came in small waves.
It started with the middle-aged man who silently drove you to and from work with a permanent scowl on his face being replaced by Sylus himself.
Then there was the sticky notes he’d usually place on documents explaining the task and deadline, now with an added addendum.
— That necklace was the best decision I’ve ever made.
— Your hair looks especially nice today.
— Did you switch perfumes? I like it.
— That new lipstick suits you. Your lips are all I can think about.
You saved all of them in a drawer at your desk.
He had someone bring you your lunch every day and spent your entire lunch break with you. Somedays you talked until your tongue felt like it was going to fall off, other days you just sat and ate together in silence. And every Friday afternoon, instead of taking you straight home, he’d take you to visit your mother’s grave with a new bouquet in his hands.
You were glad he was taking things slow. His small gestures made your heart flutter without overwhelming you, but it had been a month since your confrontation, and he didn’t even try to touch you.
While your inexperience with love, lust and romance never impacted any significant aspect of your life before, it was growing increasingly difficult to wait for Sylus to make the first move. He didn’t want to scare you, that much was understandable. But you were growing angsty waiting for him the tension between you two hit a boiling point.
The glorious plan came to you while you were shopping with Luke and Kieran for Onychinus’s annual Christmas gala. It was a networking event masked under the guise of a holiday celebration where the people hiding in the shadows of the underworld could spend one night communicating on the surface.
Every year, Sylus insisted he couldn’t outsource waiters for the event because of potential security leaks, so you, the twins and a couple other of his staff were forced to fill in as the help. Sylus told you that you wouldn’t have to participate this year, but you began to look forward to the event. It was like an unorthodox Christmas tradition.
Your eyes drifted to the costume section of the party store, and when they landed on a short red Santa’s helper dress, you felt a lightbulb turn on in your head. Maybe you had to give Sylus a little nudge.
“Hey, aren't you guys kind of bored of the slacks and the dress shirts he makes us wear?” You sowed the seed of doubt into your unwilling accomplices.
“Duh. I hate dressing like a butler.” Luke’s eyes continued to scan the aisle for decorations. The hall was professionally decorated, but you added your own little details every year. It made things less drab and it gave the twins an excuse to spend hours in the party supply store.
“What if we went with Christmas themed costumes this year?” The twins turned to look at you with confusion, but they quickly warmed up to the idea when you pointed at the wall of seasonal costumes.
“I’m Rudolph!” They made their declarations in unison before breaking out into an argument in the middle of the party store.
“Just flip a coin!” You desperately suggested, taking a coin out of your wallet and placing it on your thumb, ready to flip. People were beginning to stare.
“I’m heads!” They said in unison, again.
“Kieran you’re heads, Luke you’re tails.” You assigned them the parts of the coin alphabetically and watched it flip through the air. When it landed in your hands, it displayed tails. You silently hoped they would move on from this unnecessary battle and restore peace to your shopping trip again.
“Sorry Kieran, Luke’s Rudolph.” Kieran complained for the rest of the day about how annoying being an elf was, and how, since he was an inch taller than Luke, it only made sense for Luke to be the elf instead.
They argued like the siblings you never had, and for all the pain and suffering they caused you, there was no denying you loved having them around. Besides, working for Sylus left the three of you trauma-bonded for life. There wasn’t really an out from this unconventional friendship.
_________________
You failed to remember to clear the costume idea with Sylus before the gala. He was just so busy trying to organise the event, and you were similarly swamped with ensuring all the invoices were sent out on time to the right vendors. You barely saw each other in the days leading up to the big event.
The dress was shorter on you than you anticipated. Coming up just above mid-thigh, it was nothing like anything you owned in your closet. The little hat it came with was cute though and you pinned it to your hair. The make-up you wore was the same as your everyday makeup, barring the eyeliner you’d spent way too long trying to perfect and your lipstick.
Other than the dress, you really did look the same as you did most of the time. Would Sylus even notice?
Right on cue, a knock on your door snapped you out of your train of thought, and you took a deep breath before opening it.
As you expected, Sylus looked unfazed by your choice in attire as you moved out of the doorway to let him in.
“I see we’ve foregone the uniforms this year.” His comment was a welcome distraction from your insecurities.
“Whimsy is part of the Christmas spirit, you know.”
“It’s cute. Did you get that dress from the children’s section?”
The question came so out of left-field it left you were stunned. Once the shock settled in, you suddenly felt self-conscious.
“No… Why? Does it look childish?” You couldn’t help the vulnerability in your voice.
Sylus closed the distance between you in a few long strides, his hands were on you in an instant. His palm was holding onto your waist the other tracing alone the edge of your dress.
“Quite the opposite, I’m just wondering why they’d make a dress so short for adult women.”
“Adult women can dress however they want, Sylus.” You chided.
“I know, but I’ll have my hands full if I’m trying to host this event and take care of the hoards of men that will be chasing after my girl at the same time.” He whispered the words seductively into your ear, the hand on your thigh slipping ever-so-slightly under the dress.
You ignored the warm, fuzzy feeling that bloomed through you at the sound of Sylus calling you his girl.
“There won’t be ‘hoards of men’. This will be the third time I’m working your annual gala and I’ve only ever gotten hit on like four times.” You knew from the way his eyebrows furrowed that you shouldn’t have told him that.
“Four times? Men hit on you four times while I was in the room and you didn’t tell me?” He was clearly angry, his rage unwarranted since it happened right under his nose.
“I didn’t think you’d care. Most of them were like fifty, anyway!” That was true, and every time one of them placed a hand on your shoulder or your forearm, it made you grimace.
“If men approached you in long pants and a dress shirt with a plate of refreshments in your hand what do you think they’ll do when they see you in this get up?” He walked you back until you were standing against the wall.
He had a point. Maybe it was too suggestive.
“I can change—”
“No. You never have to do that with me, baby. Just stay where I can see you, alright?”
“Okay.” You felt a blush paint your cheeks. The tension was bubbling up between you. His hand was searing into your waist, his other one moving dangerously high on your thigh. You really thought this would be the moment he kissed you. But then the warmth of his hands was abruptly gone.
“Okay. You ready to go?” He held the door open for you. That was it? Frustrated at your lack of results, you silently walked out of your house.
__________________
“Did you see Sylus’s date?”
“Of course, she’s definitely the hottest girl here.”
“I bet she’s had work done.”
“If so, I need the name of her surgeon.”
You eavesdropped on the hushed whispers of a group of women who were gossiping in a corner near the kitchen. The second you walked through the doors of the extravagant event hall, you both went your separate ways and you hadn’t seen him since. So much for not letting you out of his sight.
All you heard about the entire night was his mysterious date and her envious beauty. He never told you he was bringing one, nor did he ever ask you to fill the spot. But before you could completely spiral, you reminded yourself of Sylus’s promise. He wouldn’t do anything to hurt you. There had to be a perfectly reasonable explanation.
“Now what’s a pretty girl like you doing working here?” Your train of thought was interrupted by the voice of a man. You turned around, expecting to see one of the many sleazy old men who frequented these events and saw you as an easy target, but all you saw was a young, attractive guy in a three-piece suit. Huh.
“Hors d’oeuvre?” You offered the plate to him in place of a response.
“No thanks. I’ve had my fill, though I must say, the other servers aren’t quite as easy on the eyes as you.” His eyes shamelessly scanned every inch of you, head-to-toe, and you felt uncomfortable under the scrutiny of his gaze.
“Oh, um thanks.” The blush on your cheeks was an unwanted biological reaction, you weren’t used to attention from men within your age range. It wasn't like you thought you were ugly, you were just a bit of a hermit.
“What’s your name, beautiful?” You were about to answer his question when someone did it for you.
“Y/N.” The voice belonged to the man of the hour who seemed to have appeared out of thin air.
“Sylus, hello. Hors d’oeuvre?” Clearly you were running out of things to say if your default reaction was to offer everyone a snack, but it was hard to find the voice to speak when you saw the girl who had her arms wrapped around his.
Miss Hunter. You should’ve known. Your eyes passed over her beautiful dress and pinned up hair. She lived up to the rumours, she was definitely the prettiest girl in the room. Next to Sylus the pair reminded you of a renaissance painting. They made sense, and clearly not just aesthetically if he brought her as his date instead of you.
Sylus saw the way your eyes trailed off to MC standing next to him. He saw the self-doubt turn your eyes glassy, and all he wanted to do was whisk you away to a private room where he could show you just how badly he wanted you, and no one else.
But his enemies were in attendance tonight, it was part of the reason he didn’t want you there. Sylus’s only weakness used to be his mortality, and even that was debatable. But now his biggest weakness was tangible, and she wore an adorable Christmas themed dress that made every man in the room brim with desire. Miss Hunter may have been the focus of all the women in attendance, but all the men could talk about was the sexy server in the little red dress. It was driving him insane.
But MC was a hunter and if he endangered her, she could get out of it unscathed without his help. Their enemies were the same, which made them perfect allies, but it also made their loved ones easy targets. Sylus would never forgive himself if he let someone hurt you. So despite the excruciating pain that coursed through him at your hurt expression, he did nothing to quell your concerns.
But he couldn’t idly stand by and let this man make a pass at you either. It was clear Henry was not aware of Sylus’s newly established no-fraternising-with-the-staff policy.
“Henry, not distracting my staff, are you?” Sylus directed his attention to his business associate. Henry ran a security company which supplied a large portion of their weaponry from Onychinus. The contract they shared was a substantial source of revenue that Sylus couldn’t afford to compromise.
“I’m just wondering where you found such delectable staff.” Sylus felt his jaw clench at the way Henry undressed you with his eyes and your consequential discomfort. Fuck the contract, he was going to make that man pay. But he couldn’t inflict his revenge quite yet, so he played nice.
“Unfortunately my staff are exclusively mine. I’m sure you understand how difficult it is to find loyal help.” Well, at least he tried to play nice. The subtle jab at Henry’s recent whistleblower scandal was a low blow, but he wasn’t above kicking below the belt.
Annoyed and slightly confused by the exchange, you rolled your eyes at the testosterone-fuelled men bickering and cleared your throat.
“I think I’m needed in the kitchen. Nice meeting you, Henry.” You gave him the kindest smile you could muster and gave Sylus no smile at all. It was the least he deserved for blindsiding you with his date.
“I should check on the catering, excuse me.” Sylus followed you to the kitchen and the second he caught up to you, he pulled you into a nearby storage closet.
There was barely any room for the both of you in there, so you were pressed up against his body. You tried to create some distance between you two, but he just pulled you back in by your waist.
“What are you doing? I’m supposed to be working and you’re supposed to be socialising. We can’t do those things from here.” You berated him quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. You didn’t really need anyone from the staff discovering you in this compromising position. You’d had enough embarrassment in one night for a lifetime.
“Miss Hunter is just here with me on business.” Sylus’s statement did little to comfort the tumultuous storm in your mind.
“I don’t care.” In a sense, it was true. It seemed your mind didn’t care whether Miss Hunter was there with him on business or not, it still hurt all the same.
“Don’t lie to me, I can tell when you’re upset.” Sylus tried to caress your cheek but you pushed his hand away.
“Okay, fine. I’m upset. Now will you let me leave?” You tried to wriggle out of his grasp but to no avail. His hand squeezed your face as he forced you to face him.
“If you’re upset, talk to me about it. Don’t antagonise me by flirting with other men. It won’t end well for them.” The fire in his eyes swore retribution and you did not want to be Henry right now.
“I wasn’t flirting!” You tried to defend yourself but you knew he’d see straight through your ruse.
“That sweet smile of yours is reserved for me and me alone.” There was no way Sylus would’ve let that over-the-top smile slide and this was exactly how you expected him to react, but it only made you more upset.
“Right, but I just have to make do with sharing you with Miss Hunter.” The irony of the situation was not lost on Sylus, but he had a laundry-list of crimes, hypocrisy was the least of them.
“I’m all yours, baby. I promise it’s just business.” He sounded sincere, and you trusted him to tell you the truth. Sylus never lied unless it was out of omission, but when you asked him a direct question, he never failed to answer honestly.
“I can help you with business.” You tried to reason, your palm resting against his pounding heart.
“Not this kind, sweetheart. I’m just trying to protect you. I need you to trust me.” You trusted Sylus with your life, with your heart. Which was why you knew you wouldn’t like the answer to the question you asked next.
“Did you sleep with her?” The mere thought of it tasted like acid on your tongue. It wasn’t like you weren’t aware of Sylus’s past, but where the other women in his life came and left like the tide, Miss Hunter’s presence was persistent.
You needed to know just how far they’d gone, even if it might destroy you.
“Yes. It was one time when we first met in September. Before I realised how I felt for you.” The words pierced straight through you like bullets of radiation. Your palm slowly slipped off of his chest and you diverted your gaze to your heels. “Y/N, you know I only want you. It meant nothing to me.”
Perhaps it wasn’t the fact that they’d slept together that hurt you so deeply. Maybe it was the way he looked at her, the way she got under his skin. Sylus may love you, but what if he wasn’t attracted to you?
The thought slipped out of you before you could mull it over. “How am I supposed to believe that when you were all over in seconds and you won’t even kiss me?!”
A hint of recognition flashed through Sylus’s eyes as he realised the catalyst behind your frustration. For some odd reason that he could never figure out, you were insecure. Even though your charm bordered on lethal and your beauty was unparalleled, you still felt inadequate. It perplexed him how someone could look so divine and not be aware of it.
“I haven’t kissed you because I wanted to make sure you were ready, sweetheart. I was worried I’d scare you away, because I’m sure if I got a taste of you I wouldn’t know how to stop.” He sounded strained when he spoke, as if he was recalling his frustration at having to hold back.
You watched him intently, his words dripped with a desire you both shared. With his body so close to yours, it was hard not to wish he’d just act on his primal instincts.
“You’re entirely unaware of your affect on me. You have no idea how precarious the string holding me back from insanity has become. When I saw you in that dress, I was sure I wouldn’t be able to hold back. But then you'd look up at me with those angelic eyes and I realise I can’t risk losing you.”
Before you could even think it through, your desire became overwhelming and your lips were on his in an instant.
It was nothing like you expected, nothing like the chaste, sweet kisses you saw in your movies. It was heated, messy, desperate. His lips ravaged yours like a man on death row devoured his last meal. You felt his desire with every movement and all the doubt you had dissipated instantly. His hands were all over you, one softly held on to your neck, while the other held on to your waist like you might disappear.
His lips moved to your cheek, your jaw and eventually the sensitive skin on your collarbone. When he bit a particularly sensitive part of your neck, you let out a whine. You hoped he hadn't given you a hickey. His face came up to yours as he looked at your lips which were red from the impact and the desire running rampant in your eyes. It might’ve been the most beautiful you’d ever looked.
“Well? I’m still here.” You whispered against his lips before giving him a chaste peck.
Sylus knew you weren’t just talking about this moment. You never left, even when he gave you a million reasons why you should. He didn’t know what he did to deserve such luck, but he knew he’d never give you a reason to walk away from him ever again.
“We should get out of here.” Somehow you knew he didn’t just mean the storage closet. He shifted to lead you out but you quickly stopped him.
“You can’t leave your own party! What about your date?” As much as the idea of MC hanging off his arm made your skin crawl, it wasn’t right to just leave her alone.
“She’ll be fine. The only woman I care about is right in front of me, and I want to do so much to her than kiss her in a storage closet.” There was an underlying promise in his tone, and you felt the slightest bit of fear that you might’ve bitten off more than you could chew.
“You’ve lasted this long, what’s one more night?” Your last ditch effort to escape the dangerous situation was unsuccessful.
“Sweetheart, I can't wait another second.” He gave you a soft, gentle kiss that conveyed his fraying restraint. Your fear felt inconsequential when he was with you, you knew you could trust him wholly with every part of you.
So, when he led you out of the storage closet and all the way to his bedroom, you never once felt scared. Or insecure. Or inadequate. Sylus worshipped you like you were his salvation and he never once let you doubt yourself again.
Later that night, as you laid in his bed underneath his covers, staring over at his peaceful sleeping expression, you realised he was your salvation too.
Christmas Day
“What’s the surprise?” You asked the same question for the umpteenth time.
“Just be patient, we’re almost there.” You let Sylus lead you through what you thought was a building while you obediently kept your eyes shut. Eventually your feet came to a halt, and you were bursting with anticipation.
“Alright, open your eyes.” When you opened them you were in the living room of a charming beach house. It was so bright it took your eyes a while to adjust, but when they did you noticed that it was decorated with splashes of your favourite shade of yellow. The large balcony doors opened to the sight of a familiar beach, and you felt a range of emotions wash over you all at once. Sadness, nostalgia, yearning.
“Merry Christmas, baby.” Sylus’s voice behind you snapped you back to reality.
“What is this place?” The awe in your voice could not be concealed.
“It’s yours. I know how much you hate being on the beach, but I also know it meant a lot to your mother. From this balcony it’ll be like you’re right there without actually being there.” He sounded almost nervous while presenting his gift to you, worried you might hate it. But there wasn’t a word that could describe the pure gratitude and love you felt for the man standing in front of you.
“You bought me a house on my mother’s favourite beach?” The disbelief in your voice was almost tangible.
“Yeah.”
“Sylus, all I got you was a pocket watch!” You thought that since you were both not very big on Christmas, you would exchange small gifts. Clearly small wasn’t a word Sylus kept in his vocabulary.
“You gave me so much more than that.” The suggestion in his voice did nothing to soothe your guilt.
“This is too much.”
“Y/N, you’re more familiar with my assets than I am, if this made a significant dent in my bank account I think you would’ve noticed when I bought it a month ago.”
“You’ve had this for a month?” The shock persisted, but he was right. His expenses ranged from a box of paperclips to the purchase of a two-hundred-million dollar industrial complex.
“Yes, I bought it the first time you asked me to take you to the beach after work.”
“But what if we didn’t work out?” A month ago that seemed like a palpable possibility, but now you couldn’t imagine your life without Sylus in it.
“I’d find a way to trick you into taking it anyway.”
You all but rolled your eyes at the memory of his less-than-graceful plan to acquire your house until you ended up working for him again.
“Right, of course. You’re quite good at that I hear.”
“I’m good at many things, I’ll remind you later.” He drawled against your ear, but before you could force him to act on his promise he spoke up again. “For now, there’s one more surprise.”
You let Sylus lead you out to the balcony with his hands on your shoulders, driving you forward. He stood behind you, his chest to your back. He pointed to a hill on the left of the house where a beautiful willow tree sat atop the beach on a cliff.
“I bought that plot of land too. I don’t want to overstep, but if you’d like, we could move your mother here. Have her final resting place be at the place she loved the most.” His voice kept you anchored as memories of your mother threatened to pull you away. It still filled your chest with overwhelming sadness when you thought of her, but the thought that she could spend forever in the place that brought her the most joy filled you with relief. You didn’t get to give your mother much, but at least Sylus helped you give her this.
You couldn’t stop the tears streaming down your face if you tried.
Sylus had come a long way from that day at the graveyard, an even longer way from the day you met him. The fact that he grew to care about your mother as much as you did made your heart swell with love for him that expanded every day. Something you didn’t even think was possible.
“She would love that.” Sylus wrapped his hands around your waist, placing an ever-so-gentle kiss on your temple. “I wish you could’ve met her when she was alive, you would’ve loved her.” They were both the strongest people you knew, and it pained you that they never got to meet.
“I’m sure I would have. After all, I am a huge fan of her work.” You couldn’t help the laugh that escaped you at his cheesy joke. You were rubbing off on him, that was for sure. He peppered kisses all over the side of your face at the sound of your joyful laugh and you had to squeeze out of his grasp to make him stop.
While you wished you didn’t have to lose someone so important to you to gain another, things always had a weird way of working out. Your future was still murky, but what you did know for sure was that ’Operation Sylus: No More’ could officially be declared a massive failure. And even though the physical hole in your heart still existed, the proverbial one shrunk to half it’s size; and you had the silver-haired man with the stone-encased heart of gold to thank for that.
Tag list: @blue-sky336 @sei-chuun @astolary @luna-looniesblog @rainkissedberries @syluslittlecrows @escape-your-nightmare @mangooes @bibistarx @kathypellar @stxrrielle @mansonofmadness @babygirl-panda19 @wegottastayfocus @zoezhive @futurecorpse92 @diabolichii @chocolatepalacecloudhoagie @cathuggnbear @blue-serendipity @huuvu @thisbitchreallyneedssleep @sh3sa1dwhat @justpassingdontworry @sylustoru @poptrim @mikachux3 @thargelalia @eolivy @vyntheria @dana-nite @miffysoo @babyx91 @fealy @sillyfreakfanparty @cassiesversion @serenity-loves-red @nommingonfood @sylusgirlie7 @browneyedgirl22 @silverbrain
Sorry if you were tagged but didn't get a notif, I think some of you might have your tags off because your blog wasn't coming up for me >:c
#love and deepspace#lads sylus#lnds sylus#sylus x reader#sylus angst#l&ds sylus#sylus imagine#sylus smut#sylus x you#lads angst#lads x reader#lads x you#lads zayne#lads fanfic#sylus fluff
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IDK what this is about but it's a fucking epic fight scene
#blood tw#csm#tw blood#tw violence#tw knife#IDK if all these trigger warnings are nessecary but I'm trying to be careful#I also don't know what csm is but that was in the previous tags so IDK if it's like a trigger warning#all found when I looked it up was stuff about becoming a certified scrum master#which is fucking hilarious#but probably not why the tag was there
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WHUMPERLESS WHUMP EVENT 2025
Welcome back to the Whumperless Whump Event of July, where we celebrate the situational and environmental side of our community via beating the shit out of our blorbos!




FAQ and plain text prompts under the cut!
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: How are the prompts divided?
Q: Where can I find the prompts list?
A: @whumperless-whump-event on Tumblr.
A: The title is a “theme” for the day, followed by two tropes and a dialog prompt.
A: Absolutely.
Q: Can I use the title as a prompt?
A: Not at all.
Q: Do I have to use all of the prompts?
Q: Can I use all of the prompts?
A: Absolutely. If it's fun, go for it--don't feel pressured to finish them all, but do follow what's inspiring you.
Q: If I'm writing a chronological story, can I swap the days to make it fit the timeline?
A: Yes. Just make sure you tag each piece with the prompt and day you're filling.
Q: Can I have early or late entries?
A: Yes. Early and late entries will not be reblogged to the event account, though.
Q: Is there an Ao3 collection?
A: Yes! This year's collection can be found here, or through searching whumperless_whump_event_july2025. Please remember to submit this year's prompts to the 2025 collection and NOT the 2024 one!
Q: Can I write NSFW?
A: You absolutely can, but the event blog will not reblog any prompt fill rated Explicit. Please ensure you tag NSFW appropriately.
Q: Can I use AI?
A: No.
Q: Can a whumper be included in the prompt fill?
A: The short answer is no. The long answer is that you cannot have the role of whumper in your prompt fill (aka: no whumper-on-whumpee); however, if the character you want to be a whumpee or a caretaker happens to be a whumper, then as long as they are not fulfilling the role of whumper, it's fine. Also, if there is a whumper, it must be totally impersonal and faceless. Here are some examples for clarification:
A character's drink is spiked at a party. OKAY: The whumper who spiked the drink is never mentioned and is completely faceless, and the story is directly about whumpee recovering. NOT WHUMPERLESS: The whumper who spiked the drink kidnaps the whumpee. A character is left alone in a storm. OKAY: The character is stranded or lost. NOT WHUMPERLESS: Whumper tied them to a post and left them in the storm. A character is mugged on the street. OKAY: The whumper is a stranger, faceless, and the focus is on Whumpee. NOT WHUMPERLESS: The whumper is a stalker and there to kidnap Whumpee.
All in all, if your goal is to fulfill the event, then try to avoid a whumper. If you're using the prompts elsewhere, then ignore this; but in the spirit of the event, no whumper roles please.
Q: How do I tag my posts?
A: Tag with #whumperless whump event, #wwevent 2025 and #wwevent day [x](Don't just tag wwe, that's wresting.) Then, tag triggers and content warnings. Please put these first in the tag order! It just makes it easier to reblog.
Q: How do I get reblogged?
A: Mention this blog in your post! It's the easiest way for me to find you. Otherwise, I won't reblog it. (This also means if you do not want your post reblogged to the event, just don't mention the blog, and it'll stay private.)
I think that's about it. That's a lot, so if you've got any questions, feel free to shoot me an ask. I'm happy to help!
PROMPTS:
INSULT TO INJURY: Infected wounds / Hurt and ill / “Fate really has it out for you, huh.”
PUBLIC MISINFORMATION: Presumed dead / Search party / “There's a hand, I can see them!”
IT'S NOT YOU, IT'S ME: Left behind / Attempted Martyr / “Get out while you can, and don't look back.”
LIKE A KALEIDOSCOPE: Numbness / Dissociation / “Can I hold your hand?”
AT LEAST IT'S NOT MANUAL: Trapped in a car / Stranded / “You can't drive like this.”
DOOMED BY THE NARRATIVE: Scheduled execution / Near death experience / “That was too close.”
AHOY THERE MATEYS: Motion sickness / Washed ashore / “I hate the ocean.”
CHEF MIS-STEAK: Hot stove / Slip of the knife / “I swear, I'm usually better at this.”
SCHEDULE YOUR MAINTENANCE: Lack of self care / Sick day / “Just take a nap. I can handle the rest.”
BOOM, CLAP: Gunshots / Sound sensitive / “Shut up, please.”
CAN'T STOP WON'T STOP: Overworking / No time to rest / “We're not safe yet.”
HOW DID WE GET HERE: Isekai'd / Evacuation / “This is not a good place to be.”
A GOOD OLD FASHIONED BEATDOWN: Training mistake / Accidentally hurting someone / “…Let's take a break.”
RIPPED THE RUG FROM UNDER YOU: Despair / Clinging on for dear life / “Please don't leave.”
GET BEHIND ME: Using their body as a shield / Full team whump / “You're such an idiot!”
KNOCK ME OFF OF MY FEET: Collapsing in public / Dizzy / “Woah, there, you good?”
SEEING RED: Bloody nose / Coughing up blood / “Good lord, is all that yours?!”
BREAKING NEWS: Storm Shelters / Huddling for warmth / “It'll be over soon.”
IRRESISTABLE: Venomous snake bite / Spiders / “Man, these bugs really just love you, don't they.”
GOT THE SNIFFLES: Seasonal allergies / Can't stop coughing / “Bring tissues next time.”
FEAR IS THE MIND KILLER: Phobias / Uncontrollable shaking / “I gotta do this. I have to.”
HUG TIME: Touch starved / Comfort / “You're safe. I promise, you're safe.”
RECOVERY PERIOD: Tending to past injuries / Bruises / “Alright. Lecture me before you pop a blood vessel.”
IT WAS ALWAYS BURNING: Wide-scale fire / Third degree burns / “You'll only make things worse if you keep doing that.”
IT'S JUST SPRINKLING: Stuck outside during a storm / Natural disasters / “We should not be out here right now.”
CAUGHT IN THE CROSSFIRE: Flying debris / Pinned / “We gotta get you out of here.”
ONLY WAY OUT IS THROUGH: Withdrawal / Hangover / “You'll get through this.”
TAKE A WALK (LITERALLY): Hiking mishap / Heatstroke or heat exhaustion / “Can we take a break?”
TAKE A WALK (FIGURATIVELY): Snapping under pressure / Lashing out / “You wanna say that again?”
MIND THE STRINGS: Mind control / Psychic mishap / “Come back to yourself, please!"
ONE WRONG STEP: Caught in a trap / Impaled / “If we remove it, you'll bleed out in seconds.”
ALTERNATES:
THE CLOCK IS TICKING: Losing track of time / Long term coma / “Was I… dreaming?”
IMPROVISED SOLUTIONS: Field medicine / Makeshift gurney / “It's all we have, I'm sorry.”
HARD KNOCK LIFE: Severe concussion / Clumsiness / "Sorry… who are you again?"
UNDER PRESSURE: Can't stop the bleeding / Disrupted healing factor / "Why isn't it working?!"
WHO'S YOUR EMERGENCY CONTACT: Workplace mishap / Distress call / "Talk to me."
SHENANIGANS AFOOT: Time loops / Body swap / "You're scaring me."
A RIVER IN EGYPT: Working through injury / Recovery / "I'm fine. I'm fine."
#whumperless whump event#wwevent prompt list#wwevent 2025#whump#whumpblr#whump prompt#whump prompts#whump event#whump writing
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This is about Arthur Lester and John Doe Malevolent in my mind
don't really care if the otp is romantic or platonic or erotic or whatnot. i care simply about the essentials (they are toxically codependent)
#like i personally see them as a weird toxic queer platonic romance#they simultaneously bring out the best and more often the absolutely worst in eachother and we love that#but i also regularly engage in shipping posts they're so delightful and the art is gorgeous#i also think arthur is extremely aromantic coded#but also i have spent real actual money on a sticker of them fucking#so like i really eat up any portrayal of their weird ass horrible relationship#some of you absolutely know the exact sticker I'm talking about#i absolutely love the both of them regardless#i could make a bomb ass powerpoint presentation on the themeing and subtleties of their friendship over the show#they're constantly lying to eachother and fighting#and also having the most emotional heart to hearts where they pour out how much they love eachother#their love for eachother literally saved them from being separated#then they immediately begin bickering again#they've both heavily traumatized eachother#john digging into arthur about faroe#arthur traumatized john with Faust (not enough people really reflect on how ABSOLUTELY FUCKED UP that situation was for john)#i could get into Yellow but i will be here all day if i do#the urge to discuss yellow grows stronger but its not relevant to the original post so i will shut up#they care so deeply for eachother and have also literally attempted to kill eachother (despite being in the same body)#(suicide trigger warning for the next tag sorry)#arthur slit his throat to save john and separate the two of them and immediately begged a god to bring them back together like be fr#then said god brings him back as he was when they first met#manipulative little ass whos being a loud mean little bitch to hide how fucking scared and lost he is#and arthur tries to quickly recreate every bit of character development that made him John in like#a few sentences#and obviously that doesn't work so he immediately dismisses the new meaner entity (Yellow) as a cruel monster and does nothing more to#try to help him as he lashes out in fear#fuck wait I'm talking about yellow#MOVING ON#not moving on tumblr is saying I've had too many tags i need to make a post about yellow some time soon
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Whumpuary 2025!
(edit in case anyone actually reads this, i messed up and put "i'm fine" in twice for day 25 and alt prompt, so either ignore that or you can use "do it" as an additional alt prompt)
these prompts came together through community submissions and then a voting form where people voted for their favorites, here are the top 53 prompts
i want to try a slightly new format where there are still only 15 days for creation prompts but with additional community prompts/questions. those are entirely voluntary but are here to possibly inspire some community interaction and trying new things
i'm excited to see some awesome creations in january!
go here for info/rules/tagging go here for faqs
(note: number 31 is not a creation prompt and therefore not required to complete the challenge, it's just colored black so the colors add up)
text version of the prompts and rules is under the cut
(image description note: there are 31 numbered prompts, on each odd number the text color is black and on even numbers the text color is white)
Whumpuary 2025
a whump-themed multi media creation event for january
create for at least one prompt from each odd/black number to complete the challenge community prompts (even/white) numbers are voluntary
main prompts
1. sacrifice | headache | "this will hurt" 2. how did you find the whump community? 3. choice | storm | black eye 4. what are your favorite whump tropes? 5. "do you trust me" | manhandled | chills 6. share your favorite whump creations (others or yours!) 7. unfair fight | insomnia | "no one is coming" 8. what media genre do you like whump in? 9. trapped under rubble | gunpoint | out of time 10. write your own whump prompt 11. "i didn't ask for this" | blood | abandoned 12. create something in a new/less familiar medium 13. close call | sleep | choking 14. what's your favorite character dynamic? 15. handcuffed | dead | "please, stop" 16. leave a comment on a whump fic/art/creation 17. drugged | "i'm glad you're alive" | revenge 18. favorite whump medium? (movie, book, art, ...) 19. "let them go" | overworked | head injury 20. send a nice message to someone in the community 21. bruises | "who are you?" | immortality 22. take 10 minutes to work on a wip 23. backhand slap | alone | "i can't do this anymore" 24. what do you take inspiration in? 25. "i'm fine" | missing | drowsiness 26. draw/doodle something whumpy 27. stuck in a loop | twisting the knife | rescue 28. find a creator in the #whumpuary tag and send them an ask 29. kidnapped | "don't leave me" | devotion 30. make a whump meme 31. say something nice about your own work
alt prompts
hiding impaled "i'm fine" rain betrayal hair pulling darkness falling (added later, not in the image: "do it")
rules & info
-any medium is allowed (art, writing, gifs, edits, ...) -prompts are open for interpretation (but the context does have to be whumpy) -create for at least one of three prompts on creation prompt days (black/odd numbers) to complete the challenge -if you're not aiming for completionist you can do however many prompts you want any way you want -community prompts (white/even numbers) are voluntary and don't count for completionist (but can be combined with creation prompts if applicable) -use alt prompts to replace main prompts you don't like some works posted on tumblr will be reblogged if tagged correctly -#whumpuary2025 -#whumpuaryno1 (number of the prompt(s)) -#sacrifice #head injury #"i'm fine" (the prompt(s) you're using) -any trigger/content warning tags -any additional tags (fandom, oc, other used tropes, ...)
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Delicate ~Bucky Barnes Imagine~
Summary: You first meet The Winter Soldier persona that Bucky worked so hard to hide.
Author’s Note: This is more of a prequel to this imagine.
Part Two | Part Three
Reader’s Pronouns: She/Her
Warnings/Tags: mentions of mind control, grumpy x sunshine trope, i used google translation so if it's bad, you know why, reader is not from New York, reader is used as a test subject but nothing bad really happens to her tbh
Do not repost this anywhere!
Bucky could trust Steve ever since he began to remember him. That's why he went to him four months after leaving Hydra.
But during the time he's been with the Avengers, the hold that Hydra had on him continued to linger. Throughout the time he's been with the Avengers, trying to get better, there were a few slip ups when he would revert to The Winter Soldier persona.
That was until he met you.
Tony had brought you after meeting you when you saved his life with your special weapon that impressed him. Your dice that affects your opponents based on what the number it landed on. One could either blind people enough for you to take them down or six that can send people flying back and cause the room to burst into flames.
Not to mention you were an excellent fighter and held a bachelors and Masters in computer science and information science. Along with a minor in physics. So Tony brought you in.
That was three months ago. Three months since you've joined the Avengers. Three months since you've met Bucky and became close to him. Three months since Bucky did everything he can to make sure he didn't show up again.
~~~~~
It was your free week after a mission. A week to recover. And you wanted to get your favorite pasties as a reward for being able to get the mission done sooner than estimated.
"Are you sure you have to have these pastries?" Bucky asked you as you were getting ready to head out.
"Yes. I've been wanting them all week and I am going to get them. You can come with me if you'd like," you offered.
"We were comfortable on the couch," Bucky tells you with a small pout.
"It's just a fifteen minute walk. I will be back soon," you smiled at him.
You got into the elevator before pressing the button.
"What do you want by the way?" You asked him.
"Surprise me," Bucky tells you with a soft smile.
"Ooh! Okay," you say excitedly as the doors closed.
You had been gone for an hour. No texts from you, no calls. Nothing. Bucky grew worried. And then he appeared.
"Где она? (Where is she?)" Steve heard. Steve quickly turned around to see Bucky standing behind him. Sam looked up from his phone as he noticed the sudden change in Bucky.
"Friday, alert everyone and let them know we have a Code Snow," Tony says calmly to prevent The Winter Soldier from being provoked.
Everyone looked at The Winter Soldier as they got ready to fight him just in case. No one knew what triggered him.
"Bucky. You're okay. It's me," Steve says. The Winter Solider stared at him with a dark look.
"Hey guys! I'm back! Sorry it took so long. Line was super long and my phone died while I played Candy Crush," you say, walking out of the elevator with the to go bag from the bakery shop.
"Y/n! Stay back!" You heard. You looked over to see everyone in a defensive position.
"What's wrong?" You asked confused. You looked over at Bucky who stared intensely at you. As if he was on a mission to protect you.
"Bucky? Is everything okay?" You asked, taking a step closer to him.
"Y/n, I wouldn't do that," Steve advised, stopping you in your tracks.
"What? Why?" You asked confused, looking over at Steve.
"He's back to his Winter Soldier mindset," Steve said.
"His what?" You asked confused. Your eyebrows furrowed, not understanding what he just said.
"Did Bucky not tell you about when he was under control by Hydra?" Steve asked you.
"He was part of Hydra?" You asked confused and in shock.
"Did you not read the files I gave you?" Tony questioned. A mixture of upset, annoyed, and confusion mixed in his tone.
"I... may have just skimmed through them," you admitted, looking away so you didn't have to look at him in the eye.
"Just come here," Tony said before grabbing your wrist.
Before Tony could pull you back to everyone else, Bucky quickly grabbed Tony's arm. Bucky pulled you back to him before throwing Tony back. Luckily, Steve quickly caught Tony.
"Bucky! No!" You yell, grabbing his right arm. He looked back at you before cupping your face.
"Ты в порядке? (Are you okay?)" The Winter Soldier asked you. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
"I don't speak Russian," you tell him.
"Are you okay?" The Winter Soldier asked you again in English.
"I'm fine. But you shouldn't have done that! Tony could've gotten seriously hurt!" You yelled at him.
"He grabbed your wrist," The Winter Soldier pointed out, remaining calm as if nothing had happened.
"But he didn't hurt me," you tell him. "Please. Don't fight them. Let us help you get back to normal."
You stared up at The Winter Soldier with a look. The Winter Soldier stared at you before giving you a nod. He stood behind you as you looked at everyone else.
"What do I do now?" You asked nervously.
"Huh. That's new," Sam said.
"Y/n, can you lead him to the lab? We need to see something," Bruce asked you.
"Okay. Um, Bucky?"
"I'm not him," The Winter Soldier tells you.
"Okay. Um what do I call you?" You asked.
"Солдат. (Soldier)"
"I'm sorry. What?" You asked.
"Soldat," The Winter Soldier corrected. But this time, he said it slower and in a way you could understand.
"Soldat. Follow me," you tell him as you followed Bruce to the lab.
You stayed next to Bucky as he sat down for Bruce to look over at him.
"Interesting," Bruce says.
"What?" You asked.
"He seems more calm when it comes to you. Before you got here, his levels were high. But now, he seems more stable around you," Bruce tells you.
"Oh. That's good?"
"I would like to try something out if that's okay?" Bruce says.
"Okay."
"Go to the training room," Bruce says.
"Do I need to change?" You asked.
"No. But just know, this is a test," Bruce tells you.
"Okay," you nervously say.
You and Bucky walked into the training room while Steve, Tony, Sam, and Bruce watched from the side.
"Y/n, remember. This is a test," Bruce tells you.
You looked at him in confusion before seeing one of Tony's training bots walk over with a knife.
"Target acquired," the robot said as it walked over to you with a knife.
It tried to attack you but you quickly dodged it. The Winter Soldier quickly grabbed the bot but it's head with his mental arm before crushing it with his hand. You looked at The Winter Soldier as he looked over at the four. He began to walk over to them, ready to attack them.
"Soldat! Stand down!" You yelled.
The Winter Soldier stopped as you rushed over to him. He looked down at you, making sure you were okay.
"I'm okay," you tell him.
"Okay. Y/n, stand here with us and Steve, you go in," Bruce tells you both.
You walked over to Bruce and Tony as you watched Steve and the Winter Soldier stand in the middle of the room. Another bot attacked Steve but The Winter Soldier didn't do anything, he stood near you, as if he was protecting you. Tony controlled the bot to come towards you but The Winter Soldier quickly stopped it. Crushing it as he did with the one before.
"Okay. It's clear to say that he's only going to protect Y/n."
"What do I do now? When will Bucky be back?" You questioned.
"Usually we keep him contained until Bucky reverts back. But if he's not letting anything or anyone hurt you, then there is a chance he could be okay to roam around as long as you're with him," Bruce says.
"Is that a good idea?" Sam asked.
"We can give it a shot. And if something goes wrong, we'll keep hm contained until he reverts back to Bucky," Steve said.
"I'm willing to try it," you tell the boys.
"Are you sure? You saw what he can do to my bots," Tony asked.
"I'll be okay. And if something goes wrong, I'll call you guys," you tell them.
"Keep this with you," Tony said, handing you a small remote with one button on it. "If he starts to hurt you, just click it and we'll rush to you."
"Okay. Thank you," you say. You looked back at the Winter Soldier who stayed nearby, staring at you.
"I am feeling hungry so come on. I'm gonna make some lunch," you tell The Winter Soldier. He nodded as he followed you out.
Throughout the day, The Winter Soldier stayed close to you. While everyone kept their distance (mostly in fear that The Winter Solider would attack them if they got too close to you), you seemed to be fine with The Winter Soldier lingering near you.
"I'm going to bed. Goodnight everyone," you say as you walked over to your room. You noticed The Winter Soldier stand by your door as you grabbed your pajamas.
"Oh right. Soldat, you can go to your room. I'm just gonna shower and sleep," you tell him.
"Я должен остать��я здесь на случай, если у тебя возникнут проблемы. (I must stay here in case you are in trouble)," he tells you.
"English please. I don't speak Russian," you remind him.
"I must stay here in case you are in trouble," he tells you.
"Um okay. I'm just gonna shower and change really quickly," you tell him before walking into your bathroom. You closed the door and locked it before turning on the shower.
After the shower, you changed into your pajamas before blow drying your hair. You walked out of the shower to see The Winter Soldier sitting on your bed.
"Do you need to shower or change into your clothes as well?" You asked.
"I don't need to."
"If you're gonna stay here you're gonna shower. Come on," you tell him before walking out of your room. You led him to his room which was as bare as when you joined the Avengers. You took out his spare clothes before handing them to The Winter Soldier.
"Go shower. If you want, I'll stay out here until you finish," you tell the Winter Soldier. Bucky nodded before walking in the bathroom. You lied on his bed, feeling yourself grow comfortable.
The Winter Soldier walked out of the bathroom in his new clothes to see you asleep on his bed. He turned off the lights for you before sitting on a chair, watching you sleep.
You could feel him watching you, making you slightly wake up.
"You know, that's really creepy," you yawned. "Just come into the bed. You're gonna give me nightmares.
The Winter Soldier sat on the bed, staring at the door, waiting for anyone to come in. You pulled in down onto the bed, making him lie down. The Winter Soldier looked at you as you slept soundly, facing him. He moved his hand, placing it on top of yours.
~~~~~
Bucky had been avoiding you ever since you both woke up in his bed after he reverted back from the Winter Soldier. No matter how hard you tried to talk to him, he was good at hiding away.
"Did I do something wrong?" You asked Wanda and Natasha.
"What do you mean?" Natasha asked.
"Bucky has been ignoring me for the past couple of days. I've tried talking to him but he keeps avoiding me," you pouted.
"You didn't do anything wrong. I think Bucky's embarrassed. I'm surprised he didn't tell you about The Winter Soldier," Wanda said.
"Is it cause I'm new?" You asked.
"You can't be that clueless," Natasha tells you.
"Clearly I am because I don't know what you're talking about," you continued to pout.
"He didn't want you to know because he likes you."
"What? What do you mean?" You asked, sitting up.
"Come on. Ever since you've joined, Bucky has been by your side. If he's not with Steve or Sam, he's with you. And even on missions, he's by your side or close nearby," Natasha says.
"He could just be friendly. Last time I thought someone liked me, they were just being nice and I felt embarrassed and never showed my face to them again," you admitted.
"Bucky is different. He likes you and it's easy for us to see that but you," Wanda says.
"But do you like him?" Natasha asked.
"Yes. He's tall, handsome, he's nice to me and I will admit, it was kinda hot seeing him all protective," you admitted.
"Go talk to him. He should be done with training by now," Natasha tells you. You nodded before getting up to find Bucky.
You found him walking to his room which you quickly caught up to him.
"Bucky. Can we please talk," you asked.
"I have to shower," Bucky says, still trying to avoid you.
"Fine then. I'll make it quick. I like you. And I don't care if you're still struggling with dealing what Hydra put you through. I want to help you anyway that I can. Because that's how much I like you. I like you for who you are. And you're just gonna have to deal with that," you tell him.
Bucky stared at you, surprised at your confession, as you stared at him.
"And now I am going to go because building up that confidence was a lot of energy and if you don't like me back, then that's fine. I just wanted you to know that I like you," you tell him before quickly turning around to leave.
~~~~~
You sat alone up on the roof as you stared out at the city. This was a long way from home but at least the view was nice to look at. You heard someone clear their throat, turning your attention over to them. You found Bucky standing nearby with a pastry box that had a slice of your favorite flavored cake.
"What's that for?" You asked.
"It's an apology cake slice. I'm sorry I've been ignoring you the past couple of days," Bucky said, handing you the cake.
"Thank you for the cake. Please be honest, did I do something wrong?" You asked him, putting the cake next to you.
"You did nothing wrong. It's mostly me," Bucky says as he sat down with you. "To be honest, I really like you too. But I was afraid you would get hurt by The Winter Soldier. Then when I woke up and you were in bed with me, I was afraid he or I took advantage of you.
"Well just to be clear, you didn't. And if you want, we can start things off slowly. I really do like you Bucky," you offered.
"I'd like that. I really do like you too, Y/n and I don't want to ruin anything between us. Believe it or not, you're the only other person I'm comfortable here with," Bucky tells you. You smiled at him.
"I'm comfortable with you too," you tell him.
"Are you doing anything tomorrow?" Bucky asked.
"Not really. Why?" You asked.
"Well, I was thinking, would you want to go on a date? We can go to Coney Island and grab some dinner. Or we can just take a stroll around Central Park," Bucky suggested.
"I like any of those. I've never fully experienced Central Park and I haven't been to Coney Island yet so surprise me," you tell Bucky.
"Alright. Will do," Bucky smiled.
"Do you want to stay here with me and stare out the city? It's one hell of a view," you say.
"I'd like that," Bucky says.
You scooted closer to Bucky before leaning your head on his shoulder. Bucky put his arm around you as you both stared out at the city.
#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes imagine#the winter soldier#the winter solider x reader#the winter soldier imagine#avengers#avengers x reader#avengers imagine#marvel#marvel imagine#alisonwritesimagines
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OOC: I've listened from my bedroom that woman accuse me of all sorts of lies today because she's fucking crazy. And my grandma doesn't know why I isolate myself in my bedroom while she's here lol (it was one of those days, I've heard saying shit at least three times, can't say anything about the times I was listening to music or sleeping)
#I don't know how to trigger warn this#is it abuse when you don't have a relationship with that person but you are forced to deal with them because of another person#and that that person tries to make you look bad#lie about you and try to gaslight you?#I'm tagging it anyway#abuse tw#vent tw#tbd#out of bullets
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I remember the days before tags when Yu-Gi-Oh! fic summaries included things like "Seto Kaiba is NOT a rapist in this one!!" because dark fanons were that common and just assumed to be in the mix. All authors were expected to add was the rating, and even that was often bumped up a level for having a gay relationship so it isn't like it was super consistent. And that's assuming it was even on an aggregator website like ff.net instead of someone's random personal webpage, in which case it definitely didn't have ratings or warnings. And it was, frankly, fine. If a fic went in a direction that was bad for me, stopping reading was always an option.
Did I start reading some really weird fucking lemons as a kid, younger than I wanted to read porn? Yeah.
Did it hurt me? No. "Your Kink Is Not My Kink And That's Okay." "Hentai Free Free." Etc.
Same with scary or disturbing themes, including in actual published books and actual distributed movies. Putting it away and stopping was always an option.
Why do ppl call it "dead dove content" when "dead dove: do not eat" just means "Check the tags for warnings." In fact why does it exist at all? When did people stop looking at the tags to determine whether they want to read something or not? Why not just use "darkfic" and "hurt no comfort" and "whump" and "angst" alongside other specific warning tags that apply to the work? Since you're already doing it anyway? Why are we reminding people to check the tags all the time? If a reader fails to check an adequately tagged work, that's on them. It's like some kind of shift happened when I wasn't looking. I'm not like.. a fandom founder or anything what Happened when did it become an indicator meaning "this is not your mommy's fluff fic"
#fanfiction#ao3 etiquette#obviously i try to add tags now that they're a thing#but honestly i have no idea what i'm supposed to be tagging half the time#because jello and soup are extremely reasonable triggers but it's impossible to tag everything that might trigger someone#so yeah i'll tag dark themes but i sometimes feel like it's as silly as the old warnings about gay romance twenty years ago
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best laid plans | MYG
✧ PAIRING: yoongi x f!reader

✧ SUMMARY: You meet Min Yoongi at a GS25 on a nothing Tuesday. You don't expect him to change your life. You certainly don't expect to change his.

✧ TAGS: strangers to lovers, angst (with a happy—but hopefully realistic—ending), smut, fluff, this is a heavy one so please heed the warnings!

✧ WARNINGS: mental health issues, depression, depressive episodes, suicidal ideation throughout, suicide mentions throughout, implied suicide attempt (sort of?), panic attacks, specifically panic attacks after (consensual!) sex, smoking, recreational marijuana use, vaginal fingering, oral (m. receiving), oral (f. receiving), vaginal sex, mentions of unprotected sex (but no real unprotected sex), MINORS DNI, please do not read this fic if any of these warnings are triggering to you!

✧ AUTHOR’S NOTE: okay. so... i said i wasn't going to post any more fics until june. and i won't post any more until then after this! i'm still on semi-hiatus! but something happened in my personal life last week, and i couldn't... not get it all out, somehow. so... here's this almost 14k monster. thank you claret @yoonmetogether for beta reading and giving me so much love and support while i was in the process of writing this! i love you! and thank you yoongi, for writing/releasing so far away (and the last) in 2016 and teaching teenage aqua how to stay, even when i didn't want to. and teaching adult aqua the same thing every year since. i hope this fic helps someone. that's why i'm posting it.
P.S. i recognize that i haven't edited my taglist since my hiatus. if you want to be removed, let me know.

✧ WORDCOUNT: 13.6k words

It’s a Tuesday night, which means nothing. Just like Monday meant nothing. Just like Wednesday won’t either.
The buzzing fluorescent lights in the 24-hour convenience store stutter overhead. You’ve been zoned out in the ramen aisle for at least five minutes now, doing the same song and dance you always do. Pretending you’re going to try something different this time, be a little spontaneous. Because you must break the pattern today or the loop will repeat tomorrow, right?
Still, though, your hand hovers over the same one you always get—the spicy one in the black package that scorches your mouth and makes your nose run. But at least it makes you feel something. So, you grab it.
Into the basket it goes, landing beside a bottle of Milkis and a crumpled bag of gummy worms. You sigh, turn around—
—and nearly walk straight into some guy you didn’t even know was in the store.
You both do that awkward side-step thing, freeze, then side-step the same way again.
“Oh. Shit. Sorry,” the guy mutters, voice low and scratchy, like it hasn’t been used yet today.
He’s wearing an oversized hoodie, the drawstrings uneven. His hair, bleach blonde, is tucked messily under a beanie, and there’s a faint line on his cheek from what was clearly a very intense nap. He’s holding a can of cold coffee and a pre-packaged egg sandwich in one hand, clutched between long fingers.
His eyes flick up to yours, and you realize, belatedly, that you’re staring. You should probably move, or say something.
“No, I—sorry,” you say, taking a step back. Your basket clinks against your knee. “Didn’t see you.”
Both of you are still kind of in each other’s way. There’s that weird, hesitant pause where you’re not quite sure who’s supposed to move next.
You clear your throat, nodding at his sandwich. “Midnight craving?”
“Something like that,” he says, eyes flicking down to the ramen in your basket. “You going for pain, huh?”
You blink, then smile a little. You didn’t expect him to be game. “Only the kind I can control.”
That makes him huff a short laugh through his nose. “Hey, no judgment. I’m out here buying coffee at midnight, so.”
You nod toward the sandwich again. “And that. Bold choice.”
“I wasn’t ready to commit to tuna.”
“Fair.”
It feels dangerously like flirting, just for a second. Awkward, clumsy flirting, sure, but flirting nonetheless. But the moment ends just as quickly as it came, like you’ve both run out of things to say at the exact same time.
You awkwardly step in opposite directions after that.
You return to your mission. First, hot water from the machine by the coffee counter. Plastic fork from the stack that’s always slightly sticky. You sit on one of the cracked stools by the window while the noodles steep and sip from your Milkis while staring out at the empty street.
By the time you make it to the register, the guy is gone. You kind of expected that.
He was cute, you think. A year ago, when you were a different girl and sort of had your shit together, you probably would’ve asked for his number. Batted your eyelashes or something stupid like that.
But now? You barely have the energy to brush your teeth most days. You’re certainly not in a place for romance. Not when your big life plan has boiled down to ‘survive one more month.’
So no, you’re not mourning the possible missed connection with the kind-of-cute stranger in the GS25. Just acknowledging it.
But then, when you’ve paid and make a move to shuffle out, the automatic doors slide open—and there he is.
Again. Leaning against the low brick wall, trying to light a cigarette with the wind working against him. The flame sputters out twice before catching.
You could leave. You should. But you linger, and since the street is pretty much desolate, he notices.
“Didn’t mean to loiter behind you,” he says, glancing up.
You shrug. “Didn’t mean to run into you. Twice.”
He waves his free hand dismissively, the other bringing the cigarette to his lips, plastic bag dangling precariously. “No harm done.”
That should be it, probably. End of conversation, end of interaction. Two strangers walk in opposite directions to wherever it is they call home.
But something about the slump in his shoulders, so similar to your own, makes you momentarily brave.
“You got somewhere to be?” you ask, gnawing at your bottom lip.
“Does it look like it?”
It doesn’t. Neither do you.
“Wanna sit?” you offer, gesturing towards the curb. “I’m just gonna eat before it gets cold.”
His eyes widen, like that’s the last thing in the world he expected you to say.
“Uh. Yeah, sure. Thanks.”
You sit. He settles a little awkwardly beside you, pulling the sandwich out of its crinkled plastic. It’s predictably silent between you, but you don’t hate it.
He eats. You slurp noodles.
And eventually, inevitably, you glance sideways.
Okay. He is cute. Decidedly. Maybe even hot, if you caught him on a better day. In a bleary, worn out way. The kind of good looks that sneak up on you, delicate and masculine all at once. Pale skin. Sharp jaw. Soft mouth. You’re not going to do anything about it. Obviously. But… still.
“What’s your name?” you ask around a mouthful of noodles.
“Yoongi.”
You nod. Don’t offer yours yet.
Yoongi takes another bite of his sandwich. Swallows. “You here often?” he asks, immediately grimacing. “God. That sounded—"
“Like a line?” You laugh. “Yeah. It did.”
“Didn’t mean it like that.”
You shrug. “I’ll allow it. Just this once.”
Small talk comes easy after that. You find out he used to live on the other side of the river and only recently moved to this part of the city because of a roommate situation that imploded. You tell him that you only planned to live in your current apartment for a year, until you could afford something better. It’s been three now.
He tells you he’s currently between jobs. You admit you’re technically not sure if you still have your night gig, because your boss hasn’t texted you in three days and you don’t want to ask.
He gives you the remaining half of his sandwich. You pass over your ramen wordlessly, letting him steal a few bites. It’s still awkward, eating so closely with a stranger like this. Sharing your dinner with someone who doesn’t even know your name. But it’s weirdly nice.
When the food is mostly gone, he holds out his cigarette pack. You take one and he lights it for you. You both pass it back and forth in silence for a minute.
“I used to think I’d be famous by now,” he says eventually, exhaling toward the gutter. “Like, not stupid-famous. Just… enough that I wouldn’t be here. You know?”
You nod. You do know.
“I wanted to be a writer,” you offer in return. “But I hate writing. And I hate people who are good at it. And I hate that I still kind of want to do it anyway.”
“I don’t even know what I do anymore,” he says. “I was making music for a while. Then I got tired. Now I sleep too much. Avoid my friends. Pick up shifts at my cousin’s record store when he gets desperate enough to ask.”
“That actually sounds kind of nice.”
He snorts. “It’s not. But thanks.”
You tip your head back, look up at the sky, which is a washed-out navy and completely starless. Seoul smog. “I work part-time at a bookstore that almost exclusively sells erotica. And I cry like, three times a week, minimum. Usually in the bathroom. Sometimes in front of customers.”
Yoongi flicks ash onto the ground. “You win.”
You both sit with it. The warm, awful food. The too-sweet soda and the gummy worms melting in the bag between your knees. The companionship of a stranger willing to share a cigarette and half of his shitty sandwich, whose life isn’t all that different from yours.
You turn your heads at the same time. Your eyes flick down to his lips where they’re sealed around the cigarette. Inhale, exhale. To his long fingers, thumbnail bitten to shit.
He’s really pretty, even like this, in the unflattering light of the streetlamp you’re sitting under. Long lashes and dark eyes that pierce through you. You wonder if his mouth really is as soft as it looks.
He’s looking at your lips, too, you realize. When you catch him, he looks away fast, ears pink.
“This is nice,” he says, staring at the concrete beneath his shoes.
You blink. Then, just as quietly, “Yeah. It is.”
He offers the cigarette again. You take it. Neither of you says anything else for a long time.
✧
The bookstore has been blissfully, predictably dead since you opened this morning. That’s really the only upside of the job—nobody shows up. You could count the regulars on one hand, and half of them only come in to use the bathroom, despite the clearly posted sign that says they can’t.
You’ve developed a theory about it, about the shame that still lingers around buying erotica in person. As if reading about sex is fine, but purchasing it in the flesh is something to feel embarrassed about. You could write a dissertation on it, probably. But you won’t. You don’t write anymore. You just clock in, count the till, and reorganize displays no one looks at.
You’ve already done your morning routine. Opened up. Counted money. Packed a frankly alarming number of online orders (apparently people really love vampire erotica). Now, you’re posted up behind the counter, flipping through a paperback about sexy cowboys with a bright red cover and a title that would make your mother blush.
You’re in the middle of counting how many times the author uses the word member on one page (six, and one was throbbing) when the bell above the door gives its half-hearted ding.
You glance up from the counter, fully prepared to give your standard ‘we don’t have a public bathroom’ spiel, when you see him. Hoodie. Messy, bleached hair. Soft mouth.
Yoongi.
Your mouth actually falls open a little. You eventually gave him your name that night, but you hadn’t exchanged numbers. You didn’t even follow each other on social media. And yet, here he is, bearing witness to you in all of your smut-peddling glory.
“I guessed,” he says, by way of explanation. He sounds a little breathless. “You said bookstore, and there’s like, two in the area. The other one didn’t have nearly enough erotica.”
“So you just… showed up?”
He shrugs, sheepish. “You didn’t give me your number.”
If he wasn’t cute, you might be a little creeped out. He’s lucky he’s got such a nice face. It makes things feel romantic.
“You want something?” you ask, gesturing to the wide variety of bodice-rippers your manager has displayed so proudly at the register.
“Yeah,” he says. “A cigarette. And maybe to talk to you again.”
You exhale through your nose, amused despite yourself. “Come on.”
You lead him through the back, past the haphazard ‘Employees Only’ sign that no one respects. Outside, the alley smells like stale piss. Very romantic, indeed.
Just like Tuesday, he lights a cigarette for you to share. You take it, and he leans against the brick wall, watching you.
“I kept thinking about you all week,” he says suddenly, no preamble. His eyes are fixed on the smoke curling off the end of the cigarette.
You take a drag, the smoke clinging to your teeth. “I thought about it too.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.” You look down at your shoes. “Didn’t think you’d actually show up, though.”
He gives a quiet little laugh, almost self-deprecating. “Honestly, I almost didn’t.”
“So why did you?”
“I don’t know. Stubbornness? Hope? Boredom?” He shrugs. “I guess I just didn’t want to go another week without feeling like something mattered. Even if it’s just a conversation in a piss alley.”
That earns a smile from you. A real one. You pass the cigarette back.
“I don’t know what this is,” he says eventually. “I don’t even know if I’m in a place to have a thing. But I liked talking to you. And I’m tired of not liking anything.”
You look at him. He’s not exactly looking back, more at the space near your shoes. But his profile is soft, a little hopeful.
“I feel the same way,” you say, cheeks hot and heartrate climbing. Something you haven’t felt in a long time—not for good reasons, at least.
He smiles. It’s small, but it feels real.
“You’re gonna give me your number this time, right?”
You dig your phone out of your pocket and hand it to him.
He types in his number one-handed, cigarette dangling from the other, then calls himself so he has yours too. When it buzzes in his hoodie pocket, he hums like that settles something. Like now, technically, you belong to each other in some tiny way.
You take the cigarette back from him. Your fingers brush, knuckles stay touching longer than they should.
“You’re not gonna ghost me now that you’ve won the chase, right?” you murmur.
Yoongi raises an eyebrow. “You think that was a chase?”
You shrug. “It was something.”
For a moment, you just stand there in the alley. The world keeps moving, traffic hums in the distance. Your shitty boss is probably inside wondering why you’ve been gone more than the regulation five minutes.
But you don’t move.
You look at him. His mouth. The cigarette between your fingers. And your body makes a decision your brain is too tired to argue with.
You lean in and kiss him.
It’s clumsy at first. Your lips a little dry, the angle off, but it doesn’t matter. He makes a sound like a surprised exhale against your mouth and then he’s kissing you back, slow and warm and honest.
He tastes like smoke and canned coffee. You drop the cigarette and his hand finds your jaw. Your fingers reach for the edge of his hoodie, twisting in the fabric like you’re worried he’ll disappear if you don’t hold on.
You kiss him again. And again.
You’re not trying to make it romantic, really. You’re not trying to make it anything. It’s just—fuck, it’s been so long since someone touched you like this. Since someone wanted to.
And Yoongi kisses like he wants to be anywhere but alone. Like he gets it.
When you finally pull back, both of you a little dazed, he lets out a quiet, almost embarrassed laugh. “Okay,” he says, voice rough. “So… this is happening.”
You nod, heart hammering. “Don’t make it a thing.”
“I won’t.”
And he kisses you again, one more time for the road, hands on your hips like maybe he needs the grounding just as badly as you do.
Yoongi leaves around the back and you go back inside like nothing happened.
But he leaves with your number, and you can still taste him on your lips.
✧
Weeks pass, but you both take full advantage of having each other’s numbers.
You text mostly during lulls, when you’re hiding behind the register pretending to alphabetize the books, or when Yoongi’s stuck in the back room of the record store sorting the new arrivals.
You never say good morning or good night. It’s not like that. But he sends you photos of weird album art, and you respond with blurry selfies surrounded by piles of books with egregious titles.
There’s comfort in the ease of it. No pressure. Just a quiet thread tying your days together.
You: someone asked if we have a bathroom and when i said no they said “then what do you do?” like they wanted me to shit in front of them for proof
Yoongi: People are the worst. Come work here. The pay is shit but at least no one talks to me
Sometimes you send voice notes instead of typing because you’re too tired, and he never comments on how drained you sound. He just sends one back where his voice is raspy and low and he’s clearly half-asleep but trying anyway.
It’s not dating, but it’s not not dating. You’re not friends, not exactly, but you care, at least a little, about whether he eats. Whether he sleeps. Whether he means it when he says he’s fine.
It’s just whatever the two of you are capable of giving right now. Somehow, that’s enough.
It’s nearly midnight when your phone buzzes.
Yoongi: You up?
Yoongi: Don’t say anything about how that sounds btw
You stare at it for a second. Then you type:
You: i am. what’s up?
You: and yes i’m going to make fun of you anyway
You: is this a booty call
Three dots bubble up and disappear. Once, twice, three times.
Yoongi: I just want to see you
Yoongi: Is that okay?
You sit up, heart doing something inconvenient in your chest.
You could say no. You could ask why. You could point out the hour, claim you have work in the morning. But you haven’t seen him since the day you exchanged numbers (and saliva), so instead, you say:
You: yeah
You: come over
You send him your address. Twenty minutes later, he shows up, in the same hoodie as last time. Holding a plastic bag with canned coffee for him, Milkis for you, and a package of cookies you once mentioned liking in a text two weeks ago.
You don’t say anything at first. He holds up the bag like it’s proof that he should be allowed inside, and you take it with a soft, bemused snort. Then you step aside so he can come in.
He enters like someone trying not to wake a sleeping house—careful and quiet and unsure of what to do with his hands.
You close the door behind him. You both fidget for a second.
“I couldn’t sleep,” he says finally, standing just inside the doorway, shoving his hands in his pockets. “Kept thinking about you.”
Your heart tips, like it’s leaning closer to him whether you let it or not.
“I’ve been thinking about you too,” you admit softly.
And then, because it’s late and you’re lonely and he’s warm and real and here, you kiss him. Again.
It’s immediate this time. No fumbling. No hesitation. Just mouths pressing together like they’re picking up where you left off in the alley behind the bookstore. His hands find your waist. Yours cup his face, thumbs brushing the sharp edges of his cheekbones. You kiss him slow, then faster. Harder.
You don’t think about what it means. You don’t try to label it. You just let yourself feel it—the weight of his body, the sound of your breaths, the sudden, startling relief of being touched.
His mouth trails to your jaw. Your neck. His hoodie bunches in your fists.
When you finally pull back, both of you flushed and breathless, he presses his forehead against yours.
“I like you,” he says quietly.
You swallow around the knot in your throat and nod. “Kiss me again.”
There's a sharpness to the way your mouths move now. You tug at his hoodie, fingers slipping under the hem to touch skin, and he makes a sound against your lips, small and desperate.
Yoongi’s hands are everywhere. Gripping your waist like he’s trying to ground himself, sliding up your back, curling in your shirt like he can’t bear to let go. He presses you up against the door, urgent, and you gasp when his teeth graze the underside of your jaw.
“Fuck,” he mutters, breathing hard. “I’m sorry—I didn’t come here for this, I just—”
“Don’t stop,” you say, voice barely there. “I want this.”
That undoes him a little. You feel it in the way his mouth crashes back to yours, the way he exhales sharply through his nose like he’s already drunk on it. He kisses you hard, lips and teeth and tongue with no finesse.
His thigh slips between yours and you move against it, just enough to chase friction, just enough to let him feel how badly you want this too.
“Jesus,” he whispers, low and raw. “You’re gonna kill me.”
You tilt your head back and let him mouth at your throat, lips wet, sucking a bruise into the skin. Your hips roll down again, slow and deliberate, and Yoongi’s breath stutters.
“I missed this,” you admit, half-ashamed. “I missed being touched. I missed wanting someone.”
Yoongi lifts his head just enough to look at you, eyes heavy, expression unreadable.
“You’re not the only one,” he says.
And then he kisses you again, deep and dizzying, and slips a hand beneath your waistband. His fingers are warm against your skin. Tentative at first, like he's giving you a chance to stop him, even now. Like some small, rational part of him is still waiting for you to say, ‘don’t.’ But you don’t. You tilt your hips forward instead, breath catching, and he exhales like that’s all the permission he needs.
He pushes his hand into your underwear and groans when he feels how wet you are.
“Fuck,” he gasps. “You’re so—fuck.”
It’s been a long time since someone touched you like this. Since someone wanted you like this. Desperate but gentle, afraid of messing it up. His fingers slide through your slick heat and you let out a sharp breath, clinging to his shoulders, your forehead pressed to his.
“I’m not gonna last long,” you whisper, already dizzy. “This is—fuck—this is embarrassing.”
Yoongi huffs a soft, broken laugh. “Don’t care. Come for me. Come fast. I want to feel you lose it.”
He fucks you with his fingers slow, then fast, then slow again. Just enough pressure to make you tremble, to make you cry out softly into his hoodie. His thumb finds your clit, and you nearly sob from the shock of it.
“Yoongi—” you breathe, hands scrambling for purchase. “I—fuck—”
“Yeah,” he murmurs. “Just like that. Let me have it. I got you.”
You come fast. Hard. Pathetically hard. Your body locks up and then shudders violently, mouth open against his collarbone, heart pounding like it’s trying to claw out of your chest. Yoongi holds you through it. Doesn’t say anything. Just lets you ride it out with his mouth pressed to your temple, breathing you in.
When it’s over, you’re shaking. Barely upright. He eases his hand out of your underwear and presses a kiss to your hairline, tender in a way that makes your eyes sting.
You bury your face in his neck.
“I can’t believe I let you finger me against my front door,” you mumble, mortified as you catch your breath.
“Can’t believe you invited me to,” he replies, grinning against your skin.
You both laugh. Quiet and shaky and a little shellshocked. You’re still leaning into him, your breath evening out, your body boneless. The high is fading, but the warmth he left behind is stubborn.
You lift your head, eyes still a little glazed, and give him a suspicious squint.
“I have a question,” you say.
Yoongi blinks, cautious. “Shoot.”
“How the fuck are you not getting laid constantly?”
His eyebrows shoot up. Then he laughs, quiet but full-bodied, like he’s genuinely caught off guard.
“I mean,” you continue, gesturing vaguely to your crotch, “that was—God. And I didn't even know if you’d be good at it! Like, I kind of assumed it would be decent, because you have a mouth and hands and a pulse—but that was fucking criminally good. Who taught you that? Why is this not a more widely available service?”
Yoongi presses his face into your shoulder and groans, laughing harder now. “Jesus Christ.”
“I’m just saying, someone out there is missing the opportunity of a lifetime.”
He finally lifts his head again, his cheeks tinged with pink. “Yeah, well. Most people don’t really stick around long enough to find out.”
That sobers you a little.
You study him—his messy hair, his blown pupils, the way he tries to play it off with a little shrug. But there’s something underneath it all. Not sadness, exactly. Loneliness, maybe.
You reach up and brush your fingers through his bangs, almost absently. “They’re idiots.”
Yoongi watches you for a moment. Doesn’t argue. Doesn’t deflect. Just leans into your touch.
And then the quiet gets to you, makes you want to crawl out of your skin, so you say:
“So… uh… want me to suck your dick?”
Yoongi freezes. His mouth opens. Closes. Opens again.
“...Right now?”
“No,” you say dryly. “Next Thursday.”
He laughs. “Are you always like this?” he asks, amused, a grin tugging at the corners of his mouth.
You ignore him and reach for the waistband of his sweatpants instead, fingers slipping under, deliberate and slow. “So?”
Yoongi exhales sharply, eyes fluttering shut. “Yeah. Fuck. Yeah, I want you to.”
His head tips back when you start kissing down his neck. His breath goes shallow. The way he touches you, light on the back of your neck, like he doesn’t know what he did to deserve this—it makes you want to give him everything all of a sudden.
So you drop to your knees in your entryway, hitting the floor with a quiet thud that echoes in the quiet. Yoongi looks down at you in amazement, eyes wide, lips parted, chest rising and falling fast.
You tug his sweats down and he helps, fingers twitching against the fabric, thick cock already hard and leaking at the tip.
“You’re serious,” he says, voice thin. Disbelieving.
You glance up at him, smirking. “That a problem?”
“Not even a little.”
You spit into your palm, spread it over the head, and he twitches in your grip. When you lean in and lick a slow stripe up the underside of his cock, Yoongi lets out a quiet, broken sound.
You’re a little rusty, but you don’t tease. You don’t take your time. You just sink your mouth down around him, spit-slick and sloppy.
“Fuck—”
Yoongi’s head knocks lightly against the wall. One hand finds the back of your head, loose and shaking like he doesn’t know whether to pull you closer or hold you still.
You bob your head faster, messier. Let your saliva drip down over your fingers, curled around the base of his cock while you work the rest with your mouth. He groans again, choked and startled, and you feel him twitch in your palm.
“Jesus, you’re gonna—fuck, you’re gonna make me cum.”
You hum around him. That does it.
He gasps. Buckles a little. Then pulls back. Not all the way, just enough to jerk himself through the last few strokes, breathing ragged.
“Shit, shit—I’m—fuck, baby, fuck—”
You look up at him, mouth open, lips shiny and wet, tongue out just barely.
He spills across your mouth, your cheek, your chin. Hot and messy and so, so much. You blink through it, a little stunned, a lot turned on.
“Holy shit,” he breathes, staring at the mess he made of you. “You’re—god. You’re insane.”
You wipe your mouth with the back of your hand, still grinning. “You’re welcome.”
Yoongi laughs breathlessly. “I think I just fell in love with you a little.”
You feel the shift, then. It’s small, almost imperceptible, but suddenly the air feels different. Too quiet. A little too still.
“Don’t be weird about it,” you huff, just to fill the space.
Yoongi leans down and helps you up with careful hands. Your legs are a little wobbly. His hoodie is rumpled. His hair’s a mess. His sweatpants hang loose on his hips and his lips are kiss-bitten and red.
You glance at him, then away just as fast.
You’ve crossed some invisible threshold. You both know it. And now you’re just... here.
“I’m gonna, um.” You gesture vaguely toward the hallway. “Wash my face.”
Yoongi nods, but doesn’t say anything. You don’t look back as you walk away.
In the bathroom, you stare at yourself in the mirror, palms braced on either side of the sink. You wash your hands. Splash your face. Pat dry and breathe.
Or try to.
Fuck, are you having a fucking panic attack? Over that? Your chest is tight, every cell of your skin foreign to you. Like you’re wearing someone else’s body and she just did something you weren’t supposed to.
What the fuck was that?
Not the act itself. That part was great. The enthusiasm, the sheer filth of it—you don’t think you regret it. Maybe. It felt good, in the moment. You wanted it.
It’s what came after.
The shift. The quiet. The moment you felt like he saw too much of you. The part of you that glows when it’s being wanted, and dims just as quickly when it’s alone again.
And—Jesus, ’I think I just fell in love with you a little’? Who the fuck says that?
It takes you longer than you’d like to calm down. You do the breathing exercises you were taught, back in college when counseling was free and they handed out pamphlets on every corner of your campus. In for four, hold for seven, out for eight. You smooth down your shirt. Brush your fingers through your hair.
Then return to the living room like you didn’t just spiral for fifteen straight minutes.
When you return, breathing still a little labored, Yoongi’s sitting on the arm of your couch with his elbows on his knees, staring at the floor like he’s afraid of what comes next. Like you’ve left him with his thoughts for too long.
He sits up when you approach, brow furrowed at the state of you.
“You okay?” he asks.
You sigh and sit down.
“Yeah. I just…” You stare straight ahead. “That was good. Really good. But it’s been a while. And I don’t know what I’m doing. With any of this.”
Yoongi nods slowly. “You don’t have to know,” he says. “I don’t either.”
You turn to look at him, and the thing in his eyes, the softness, it’s too much. So you keep going.
“Not just the sex. Not just… you. This,” you say, gesturing at yourself, then your apartment. The mess that’s accumulated over the past month. “Letting someone see me when I don’t have it together. When I’m not even trying to pretend I do.”
You rest your head on the back of the couch, stare up at the ceiling like maybe it’ll swallow you whole if you keep talking.
“I don’t know why the fuck now of all times is when I’m letting myself feel anything,” you say. “It’s not like my life is better. It’s not like I’ve earned it.”
Silence.
Then Yoongi shifts. Leans forward, elbows on his knees again, like he’s working up to something.
“You don’t have to earn anything,” he says. “There’s no quota for being okay. Or being wanted. You can be a mess and still deserve good things. You can be at your worst and still… feel.”
You laugh. Bitter and small. “So what, we’re just two disasters trying to convince each other it’s fine?”
He shrugs. “Pretty much.” And then, so gentle it nearly breaks you, he adds, “I don’t think I’m here to fix you. I just want to be here.”
How can he be so sure?
You don’t know a damn thing about him. Not really.
You know he works the stock room in a record store part-time and hates most of his coworkers. You know he smokes too much. That he eats terrible sandwiches and drinks canned coffee. That he texts like he’s trying to make you laugh even when he’s probably in the middle of some breakdown of his own.
You know he’s good with his hands.
You know he looked at you, in all of your mess, like you were still human. You know that he says dumb, grossly honest shit way too easily.
But you don’t know where he grew up. You don’t know what keeps him up at night. You don’t know what kind of heartbreaks he’s carrying, or who let him down hard enough that he walks around like he does.
And still, there’s something in your chest that won’t calm down. Something desperate. Clawing. A tightness you don’t want to name.
Why?
Why the fuck are you feeling so much for someone who’s barely more than a stranger?
Is it just the attention? The intimacy? The fact that, for once, someone touched you without asking you to be okay first? Is this what happens when you’re starving? When your skin has been untouched for too long and someone comes along with warm hands and tired eyes and lets you fall apart without flinching?
Maybe.
But it doesn’t feel shallow. It doesn’t feel fake. Instead, it just feels too easy. Like being with him turns the volume down in your head. Like you don’t have to explain yourself to be understood.
It scares the shit out of you.
Yoongi slips down from the armrest, sinks into the cushion next to you instead. Your knee brushes his. His arm rests behind you on the back of the couch, not quite around you, but near enough that if you leaned even slightly, he’d catch you.
Neither of you moves for a while. You just breathe.
Then his arm moves and his pinky finger nudges yours.
A small thing. Stupid. Barely anything.
But it’s the first deliberate touch since everything happened in the entryway. And it’s soft. Hesitant.
“We don’t have to do… that,” he says, quiet but firm. You know he means the sex. “We don’t have to do anything.”
Maybe you don’t need to define it yet. Maybe it’s not about love or fate or healing. Maybe it’s just about want.
Two people letting themselves be wanted for a while.
You hook your pinky around his.
Just this, you think. Just this is fine.
✧
Yoongi doesn’t push. He doesn’t label anything. He just keeps showing up.
Sometimes at your place, sometimes at his. Sometimes at the bookstore, when he has a day off.
There’s a pattern now.
Late-night convenience store runs. Shared ramen on cracked stools by the window, making fun of people’s bad haircuts as they pass on the street outside. Socks borrowed and never returned. His hoodie living permanently on the back of your chair. Your phone lighting up with ‘Proof of life?’ on days he knows you’re at a low.
Sometimes you kiss. Sometimes you just sit in the same room and don’t say anything. Sometimes he talks and you don’t respond. And that’s okay, too.
It’s not about what it is. It’s about the fact that it keeps happening.
When you disappear, he still shows up. Like today.
It’s not a dramatic breakdown. Not this time.
Instead, it’s the kind of bad week that sinks its teeth in slow. No single catalyst, no big meltdown. Just one exhausting day stacked on top of another, until your body forgets how to move without dragging. Your sink is full of dishes you can’t look at. Your hair’s unwashed. You haven’t eaten anything substantial in days.
You didn’t text Yoongi to come over. You didn’t say much of anything at all this week.
But you must’ve sounded off, or maybe he just knows how to read silence better than most, because around three in the afternoon, you hear the soft knock at your door.
You don’t answer at first. You don’t mean to ignore him, you just can’t make your legs move.
A minute passes, and your phone buzzes from somewhere near your pillow.
Yoongi: Not trying to crowd you. Just wanted to drop off some food Yoongi: Leaving it by the door. No pressure
You muster the energy to roll out of bed and crack the door open. A plastic bag sits at your feet and Yoongi is already halfway down the hallway, hands in his pockets.
“Yoongi,” you call, your voice raspier than you expect.
He turns around.
“Hey,” he says, probably surprised that you’re upright.
You open the door wider. “You can come in. If you want.”
Yoongi hesitates just for a second, checking that you’re sure. Then he nods. He picks the bag up and slips inside without a word, setting it on your kitchen counter.
He doesn’t try to hug you or touch you or ask what’s wrong. He doesn’t judge your apartment, the clothes strewn about, the closed curtains, the dishes piling up in the sink. He barely even looks.
“You eaten today?” he asks, gently.
You shake your head. “Not really hungry.”
“Okay,” he says. “I’m gonna make something anyway. Just in case.”
He moves around your kitchen like it’s his. Not because he’s overly familiar, but because he’s not afraid of your mess. He pulls out eggs, rice, a few green onions from the bag he brought.
You retreat back to your couch. You didn’t mean to lie down again, but the second you sit, your body droops until you’re horizontal. So you stay curled on your side, facing the wall. Listening.
The clink of metal. The whoosh of your gas burner catching. The soft sizzle of garlic hitting oil.
You don’t remember falling asleep, but when you wake up, Yoongi is sitting on the floor in front of the couch, cross-legged, a steaming bowl in his lap and another on your coffee table.
You push yourself up slowly. Your head aches, your throat’s dry, but you can’t lie. It smells good.
“You didn’t have to—” you start.
“I know,” he says, soft. “I wanted to.”
You eat in silence. The rice is soft, buttery, a little salty from the soy sauce and the eggs scrambled through it. You’re hungrier than you thought, but you pace yourself.
Halfway through, he glances over at you.
“You wanna watch something dumb?”
You nod.
Yoongi takes your bowl when you’re done, rinses both of them without comment. When he comes back, he takes a seat next to you. He scrolls through streaming apps on your TV until he lands on something you like.
The opening credits roll.
He doesn’t try to hold you. Doesn’t try to tell you it’s going to be okay. He just sits beside you, shoulders barely brushing. When your body droops again, he lets you lean into his side.
Somewhere around the fifteen-minute mark, he mutters, “You don’t have to be okay for me to want to be here.”
You don’t look at him. Your throat tightens like you’re going to cry. Which is something, at least, after the numbness of the week.
“This could be me next week,” he says, like it’s nothing. “Or tomorrow. So. I get it. That’s all.”
And then the movie continues. One ridiculous scene after another. The light from the screen flickers across his face.
You don’t say thank you yet, but you know you don’t have to.
✧
You still haven’t put a name to it.
Neither of you has tried. There was one moment, maybe, a few days ago. Yoongi was over for no particular reason. He’d looked at you from your kitchen floor, head propped against the cabinets, lips red from kissing, and opened his mouth like he might ask.
But then the takeout came, and the moment passed.
You text like friends. ‘Want anything from the store?’ ‘This customer just asked if we sell records on vinyl. I hate it here.’ ‘What are you doing tonight?’ ‘Absolutely nothing.’ ‘Come do nothing with me.’
You hang out like you’re in a relationship. Eat cross-legged on his bed. Steal fries from each other’s plates without asking. Sometimes fall asleep shoulder to shoulder watching terrible TV.
You make out. A lot.
Against walls. On couches. Outside each other’s doors at night when neither of you feels like saying goodnight just yet. It never quite escalates to the point it did that night—maybe once or twice it almost does, but one of you always pumps the brakes.
You don’t meet each other’s friends. You don’t ask about exes. You don’t introduce him to your sister or take photos together or exchange socials. Because that doesn’t feel like what this is.
You like the bubble you’ve built. The little world where nothing outside matters. Where it doesn’t have to matter yet.
Because outside the bubble, your life is still a mess. Rent’s overdue. Work is torture. You haven’t written anything in over a year and you haven’t figured out how to be proud of yourself again, not really.
But inside it—when Yoongi’s mouth is on yours, when he texts you ‘Made extra ramen if you’re hungry btw’ like that’s not the most romantic shit anyone’s ever said to you, you feel steady.
But, like anything else, it comes with its own set of issues.
The thing about not fucking is that it used to be about not wanting. A lack of drive. A lack of spark. A lack of time or energy or libido or options.
But now? Now, it’s something else. Because you have the option.
Now, it’s starting to feel like a crack in the glass. Like every time you grind against his thigh with your hips twitching and your breath shaky, or every time he pulls your shirt off and buries his face between your tits but doesn’t go lower, the crack gets a little deeper. And you’re both pretending not to see it.
Because the truth is: you want to fuck him.
You desperately want to fuck him.
You think about it constantly. The way his fingers curled inside you that first night, the soft, filthy way he talked to you, the way he looked down at your face when you sucked him off like he was watching a goddamn miracle unfold.
You think about how he’d feel inside you.
You ache with it.
But you don’t bring it up. Because once you do, once you have sex, it’s not a bubble anymore. It’s real, something with expectations.
And you know yourself, you know how you get. You’ll start needing more. Wanting more. And Yoongi, sweet and quiet and lost in his own way, will become another thing you don’t know how to manage. Another thing you don’t know how to keep.
You’re scared of that. Of ruining it. Of letting your body talk you into something your heart might not be strong enough to carry.
So you kiss him like you’re dying, but when his hands drift to your waistband, you laugh, too high-pitched, and pull away. Pretend you’re tired. Or hungry. Or something, anything. Any excuse not to cross that final threshold. Yoongi never pushes. He just nods, catches his breath, and helps you back into your shirt like a gentleman.
But you feel the tension growing. Between your thighs. In your chest. In the way you wake up soaked and aching after every sleepover, body clenching at nothing. In the way your kisses are starting to come with more teeth. With soft little growls in your throat you didn’t mean to let out.
Tonight, he’s at your place again. It’s late. You both know he should’ve left hours ago, and the crack is splintering even further, faster than you realize.
You’re straddling Yoongi on the couch, your knees bracketing his hips, your mouth fused to his. Your hips are rocking down, slow and aimless at first, but building. You can feel him getting hard beneath you, feel the press of him through his sweats as you drag your clothed pussy over him like your body is starving.
Yoongi groans into your kiss. His hands grip your thighs, fingertips twitching. But, like always, he doesn’t push. He just lets you move, lets you grind down on him with that ragged little gasp in your throat, lets you take what you need without crossing the line you’ve both carefully danced around for weeks.
Except tonight, something’s different. You’re different.
Because when he tilts his head and mouths at your neck, hot and slow, and mutters, “you’re gonna make me come in my fucking pants,” you snap.
Completely.
You pull back just enough to look at him, breathing hard, eyes wild. “I want to fuck you.”
He blinks. Catches up slowly, like he’s not sure if he imagined it.
“I want you to fuck me,” you amend, a little louder. Desperate.
Yoongi just stares at you for a moment, mouth parted, chest heaving. His hands tighten on your thighs.
“You sure?” he asks, voice rough.
Once you say yes, it happens fast.
Yoongi’s hands are everywhere. Gripping your hips, your waist, sliding up your back to tug your shirt over your head. He peels it off and tosses it somewhere behind you, eyes locked on yours like he’s giving you one last chance to change your mind.
You don’t.
Your bra’s off next, fast, and he curses the second your tits are bare, like he can’t believe this is happening. Like he’s been thinking about it for weeks too, and now that it’s real, he doesn’t know where to start.
So he starts with his mouth.
He palms your breasts and groans low in his throat, then leans forward and takes one into his mouth like he needs it—hot tongue flicking over your nipple, lips sucking gently before he bites, just enough to make you gasp. His fingers find the other, circling and pinching lightly.
“Fuck,” you whimper, arching into him. “Yoongi—”
You grind down on his cock again, still half-dressed from the waist down, the friction sharp and unbearable. You’re soaked. You can feel it. Your panties are useless at this point, clinging wetly to your folds, and you’re half a second away from tearing them off yourself if he doesn’t move faster.
“Condom,” you breathe. “Please. Where—?”
“Yeah—fuck—yeah, hold on.”
You scramble off his lap at the same time he stumbles off the couch, both of you half-laughing and swearing under your breath. He digs through his bag on your floor, frantic, muttering, “I swear I had one—fuck, wait—yes.”
He holds it up like a prize, and you don’t even give him the chance to rip it open before you’re tugging your shorts and panties down in one go, stepping out of them and crawling back onto the couch.
Yoongi stops cold, stares at you for a second.
Hair messy. Chest heaving. Legs spread. Eyes hungry.
“Fuck,” he murmurs, tearing the foil open and shoving his sweats halfway down his thighs with shaking hands. His cock bobs free, hard and flushed and so ready, and your mouth actually waters.
He rolls the condom on with practiced ease and climbs back over you, settling between your legs like he belongs there. Like he’s done it a hundred times in dreams and is finally allowed to touch.
He presses inside you slowly, inch by inch, and the stretch knocks the breath from your lungs. You’re soaked, but it’s still so much, been too long, and you cling to his shoulders with a gasp.
Yoongi groans, forehead dropping to yours.
“Jesus, you’re tight,” he rasps. “Fucking wet.”
You whimper, hips already rolling up to meet him. “Been wanting this,” you whisper. “Needing this—”
“Yeah?” he murmurs, voice shaking. “You gonna let me give it to you?”
“Yes, please—”
And then he starts to move. Just the brutal press of his hips to yours, every thrust deep and deliberate and filthy, like he’s trying to bury himself somewhere he won’t be able to crawl back from.
Your head tips back against the couch, eyes rolling up, mouth falling open on a gasp that barely sounds like a real word. He’s got one hand gripping the arm of the couch behind your head for leverage, the other wrapped tight around your thigh, keeping you pinned wide open beneath him as he fucks into you.
“Fuck, Yoongi—fuck—”
“You like it, baby?” he growls.
You whimper, nodding helplessly, your hands scrambling up under his hoodie to claw at his back, his sides, anywhere you can touch.
Your skin’s on fire. Your thoughts are gone. All you know is the sharp, perfect drag of his cock, the sound of your soaked cunt every time he slams into you, the guttural noises he makes when your walls flutter around him.
“You feel so fucking good,” he groans, eyes squeezed shut, jaw clenched. “Tight little pussy just gripping me—shit, baby, I can’t—”
His pace stutters for half a second, like your body is pulling the soul out of him.
You cry out when he hits deep—too deep—and he groans, pulling your legs higher around his waist to get the angle just right.
“There,” he growls when you shatter under him, thighs shaking, cunt clenching so hard he nearly loses it. “Fucking cum.”
You come like you’ve lost control of your body. Loud, legs locked, nails in his back. It hits hard and fast and doesn’t stop, rolling through you in hot, humiliating waves. Yoongi hisses, desperate now, chasing his own end, rhythm starting to break.
“Gonna fill you up,” he pants, even though the condom’s there, even though it’s just a filthy fantasy, and you sob at the idea of it. “Fuck, I wish—wish I could come inside you—fuck—you’d let me, wouldn’t you? Let me ruin you for anyone else—”
“Yes,” you gasp, not even sure you mean it, but it sounds right. Feels true.
That’s all it takes.
Yoongi groans like it’s been punched out of him, hips jerking as he comes hard, cock twitching inside you, face buried in your neck as he spills into the condom.
You both stay there, gasping against sticky skin through the aftershocks. He kisses your neck once. Then again. And again.
“Holy shit,” you breathe, dazed. “I think you just rearranged my internal organs.”
Yoongi laughs. “Cool. I was aiming for your soul.”
The couch cushions are half off the frame, your legs still trembling where they’re spread open around his waist. Yoongi pulls out slowly, careful, and your body aches from it, clenches down involuntarily, already missing the stretch.
He ties off the condom, looks around for somewhere to put it before settling on the empty takeout bag from earlier. Pulls his sweats back up.
You sit up with limbs like jelly, not bothering to put your underwear back on just yet, and run a hand through your hair. Your thighs are sticky. Your lips are swollen. You feel fucked out and raw and wrung clean.
Your body is so satisfied.
Predictably, your brain is a different story.
You glance over at Yoongi. He’s slouched against the other end of the couch, head back, eyes closed. His hair is damp at the temples, chest still rising and falling like he hasn’t quite come back to himself yet.
He looks gorgeous.
You want to kiss him.
You also want to run.
That tight, itchy feeling—the one you’ve been avoiding since you first let him touch you���comes roaring back. You just crossed the line. You fucked the one good thing in your life that wasn’t tangled in expectations. That didn’t ask anything from you.
You broke the bubble.
He opens one eye and glances over at you.
“You okay?”
You nod. “Yeah. Just…” You trail off. Shrug. “That was intense.”
Yoongi huffs a soft laugh. “Yeah. You think?”
You stand. Your legs are still shaking.
“I’m gonna, uh… go pee,” you say, already heading toward the bathroom. “Before I die.”
He doesn’t stop you. Just nods, eyes following you for a second before he looks away.
You close the door and sit on the edge of the tub. Breathe.
You want to feel good. You do feel good. But also… you feel like maybe you’ve fucked up. Or you’re about to. Or like this is going to change something that shouldn’t be changed.
You think about what you’ll say when you go back out there.
You think about whether he’s getting dressed. Whether he’ll leave. Whether he should.
You think, I don’t want this to become another thing I have to recover from.
✧
When you finally open the bathroom door, the light feels harsher than it should, and your skin’s still warm from the shower you didn’t really want but took anyway. Just to delay, to think, to scrub away the sweat and the way his hands felt on your hips and the way your body sang for him.
You step into the living room wearing clean underwear and a fresh shirt. Your face is bare. Your hair is damp. Your expression, despite your best effort, is a little too tight.
Yoongi looks up from the couch, where he’s still sitting, this time in his sweats and hoodie again, elbows on his knees, fingers idly twisting the hem of his sleeve.
His eyes meet yours. He doesn’t smile, but his gaze softens. Immediately.
“Hey,” he says, quiet.
You nod, cross your arms. “Hey.”
He watches you for a second, then leans back, patting the space next to him.
You hesitate, but you lower yourself onto the couch anyway. Not quite touching, not quite distant. A safe middle.
“Wanna tell me what’s wrong?”
“I’m fine.”
“Okay,” Yoongi says, disbelieving. “Then why do you look like you’re trying to figure out how to ghost me while I’m still in your apartment?”
You wince, staring at your knees. “I just—I didn’t mean for this to turn into, like… a thing.”
He nods slowly. “Okay.”
“I mean, we’re not, right? A thing?”
You look at him now, really look. Your heart’s racing. Your stomach’s twisting. You’re not sure what kind of answer you want.
Yoongi looks back at you for a long moment. Then he leans back again, scrubbing a hand through his hair.
“I don’t know what we are,” he says. “I wasn’t trying to make it anything.”
You swallow hard, because part of you thinks that should make you feel better. Instead, it just makes your chest ache. You were the one who let him in, even when you swore you wouldn’t. You’re not trying to make him feel like he’s the one at fault here. It’s you. It’s always you.
“But,” he adds, eyes flicking to yours again, “I like you. I care about you. And if we’re fucking now, yeah, that’s gonna mean something to me. Even if we never put a label on it.”
“Doesn’t that make it worse?” you ask, voice thin. “If it means something?”
Yoongi doesn’t speak for a long while. You sink into him without meaning to, thigh to thigh, arm to arm. You don’t really know why.
He exhales, slow and deliberate, and says, “Can I tell you something?”
You nod against his shoulder.
“I wasn’t supposed to be at that convenience store,” he starts, voice shaky in a way that makes you sit up, just slightly. “I mean, I didn’t have a reason to be anywhere. But that night… I think I was sort of… walking around to see if I’d change my mind.”
You still. Your heart trips over itself, because that could mean a lot of things. Because you know, just by the tone of his voice, that he means the worst.
He keeps going.
“I’d been thinking about it for a while. Not in a loud way. Not even like a plan. Just… wondering. If things would be better. Easier. If I just stopped. Just disappeared.”
You don’t interrupt. You don’t breathe too loud. You just listen.
“And that night, it felt close. Like maybe I was ready. Like maybe no one would notice.” He lets out a shaky laugh. “I hadn’t talked to anyone in a couple days. I didn’t even brush my teeth before I left the house. I just started walking.”
Your eyes sting. You try not to let it show.
“I stopped at the store because I thought—fuck it. One last shitty sandwich. One last can of cold coffee.” He huffs. “Really poetic, right?”
You let out a breath. “Yoongi—”
He shakes his head. “I’m not telling you this so you’ll feel bad. Or because I think you saved me. You didn’t. You just… made it a little easier to stay.”
You’re crying now, because god, you didn’t know, but you know. You know how it feels to always have that in the back of your mind, to convince yourself that there would be relief in giving up. Letting go.
He turns his head toward you now, not quite meeting your eyes, like he’s still unsure if he’s allowed to say all this out loud.
“I still think about it. Sometimes. Not all the time. But… it comes back. When it’s quiet. When I’m alone too long. But since that night, it’s been easier knowing that someone gets it. That I don’t have to pretend I’m fine all the time.”
He finally looks at you, and it’s not a dramatic, sweeping kind of moment. There’s no soft lighting or music swelling. Just his tired eyes, and your tired heart, and the shared weight of knowing what it feels like to want to give up—and choosing, for whatever reason, not to.
“Maybe that’s all this has to be,” he says. “Not a love story. Not some perfect, clean thing. Just… two people who don’t always want to be here, making it a little easier for each other to stay.”
You can’t speak. You nod, and your eyes blur, and Yoongi presses his forehead to yours like it’s the only way he knows how to say thank you for seeing me.
✧
Days later, things aren’t better—not in the way people usually mean. Your life is still a mess. His is too.
But something’s changed. Settled.
He lets himself in now. Doesn’t knock. Kicks his shoes off like he lives there, shrugs his hoodie off and drops it somewhere near the couch, grabs two cups and fills them with whatever’s in your fridge.
And you let him.
You sit next to each other, thigh to thigh, flipping through shows you won’t finish. You kiss during the commercials. You fall asleep with his hand on your waist.
You still haven’t said you’re together. You still haven’t said what you mean to each other. But when you’re quiet for too long, he looks up from his phone and asks, “Okay?”
And when he’s too quiet, you ask, “Wanna stay the night?”
And when you both lie awake in the dark, not talking, not moving, you think: I’m still here.
And so is he.
✧
It starts with scraps. Half-sentences in your notes app. A phrase here, a sentence there. Something you jotted down after Yoongi left one night, when your chest felt like it was holding more than usual and your bed still smelled like his shampoo.
Then it becomes a little routine. You open your laptop without the usual dread. You stare at the cursor blinking in a half-finished document and think: maybe I can.
It’s not for meant to be published. It’s not for anyone but you. But it’s something.
One night, Yoongi finds you sitting on the floor with your laptop on your thighs. You’re so focused, you don’t even hear him come in.
He just watches for a second, quiet.
“Writing?” he asks eventually, and you jump.
“Jesus—” You slam the laptop shut on instinct, and he raises both hands in surrender, shoulders shaking with laughter.
“You don’t have to show me,” he says, setting down the drinks he brought. “But… that’s new.”
You shrug, embarrassed. “It’s nothing. Just… stuff.”
Yoongi sinks to the floor beside you. “You haven’t written since we met.”
“I haven’t written in a long time.”
He doesn’t ask why not. He already knows.
Instead, he leans his head on your shoulder and says, “I’m glad you’re starting to again.”
He doesn’t push. He doesn’t ask for details. He doesn’t ask to read it. He just sits with you, there on the floor, eyes closed. Like your writing means something just by existing.
You open the laptop again.
You keep writing.
✧
Yoongi is sitting cross-legged on your bed while you type, cradling a cup of tea you made him because he clearly needed something to do with his hands.
You can tell he’s nervous. He’s got that look on his face like he’s about to say something serious but is trying not to scare the shit out of you. It isn’t working.
“So,” he says, after a long stretch of silence, “I have a friend.”
You glance up from your laptop, blinking. “Amazing.”
Yoongi huffs. “Kim Namjoon. He’s an old friend. College. We used to mess around with production stuff, back when I thought I was gonna be a genius producer with a Grammy by 25.”
You smile a little at that, set your laptop aside. “What’d he say?”
Yoongi hesitates, fingers drumming softly against the side of his mug. “He got some seed money. Not much. Just enough to rent a space, get a couple of half-decent mics, some gear. Says he wants to start a small label.”
Your stomach does a little flip. Not because you’re worried. Not yet. But because of the way he’s saying it. Like he’s trying not to want it too much.
“He wants me in on it,” Yoongi continues, staring down into his tea. “It’d be three of us, working in a basement, surviving off cup ramen. Maybe getting a local artist to sign on eventually.”
You exhale. “That sounds… really fucking cool.”
Yoongi finally looks at you. He’s smiling now, just a little, but it’s tight at the edges. “Yeah. It does.”
“And?”
He shrugs, but it’s not a real shrug. It’s that shoulder-lift people do when something matters too much. “And I don’t know. I don’t know if I’m ready to give a shit again. I don’t know if I’ll fuck it up. I don’t even know if I still have anything to say.”
“You do,” you say, instantly.
His jaw flexes. “Yeah, well. Maybe. He’s starting soon. Wants me to come by next week. Just to mess around with some demos, get a feel for it again.”
You nod slowly. Try not to let the ‘what if’s start swirling. What if it pulls him away? What if he leaves? What if this tiny, fragile thing you’re building—whatever it is—gets buried under a dream he's only just remembered how to want again?
But you don’t say any of that.
Instead, you say, “You should do it.”
Yoongi searches your face for a long time, hesitant, like he’s trying to catch you in a lie.
“Yeah?”
You reach over and take his mug, set it on the nightstand. You curl into his side, your face pressed to the crook of his neck.
“Yeah,” you whisper. “I think maybe… we’re both starting to remember how to want things again.”
You feel him breathe out. Slow. Unsteady.
But he nods.
✧
Yoongi doesn’t stop texting. He still sends you memes, voice notes, the occasional photo of his workspace—a cramped basement room with exposed pipes and cords spilling out over his desk, coffee-stained notebooks piled next to a MIDI keyboard.
But he’s not around as much.
The nights you used to spend together—half-draped over one another on the couch, kissing during reruns, sleeping side-by-side without labels—are fewer now. Sometimes he falls asleep at the studio. Sometimes he doesn’t respond until 2 a.m., when you’re already asleep.
It’s hard. You won’t lie to yourself about that. You feel the absence like a low-grade fever. Always there, dull but insistent.
And there’s still no word for what you are. No boyfriend, no girlfriend. Just… you, and Yoongi. And this thing you’ve built together, quiet and warm and undefined.
But when you do see him—when he walks through your door smelling like coffee and sweat and work—you can see it on him. The spark. The momentum. The low, buzzing joy of trying again. Of wanting something bad enough to bleed for it.
He’s tired. But he’s tired for a good reason, now.
And that makes you want to try, too.
So you keep opening your laptop. Not just to scribble down half-formed ideas, but to finish. You sit with the mess of it, the aching in your fingers, the voice in your head that says ‘why bother’—and you write anyway. You dig up old stories, rework scenes that used to make you cringe. You find your voice again, piece by shaky piece.
Sometimes, late at night, you send him snippets. Just to say, look. I’m doing it, too.
And he always responds, eventually. Usually something like:
Yoongi: Fuck yes
Yoongi: Proud of you
Yoongi: Also the studio toilet flooded again. I’m going to kill Joon
You laugh. You keep writing.
It still hurts sometimes. Missing him, wondering what all this means. But now the hurt is paired with movement. With hope.
✧
Eventually, you finish something.
It’s not perfect. Not even close. There are typos and sentences that feel like strangers to themselves, and places where the ending is still a little jagged and wrong. But it’s done.
A full manuscript. Your name at the top. Your words, your voice, your pain and hunger and stupid hope wrapped into a whopping 112 pages.
You think of Yoongi when you submit it with an application to a graduate school program. A program you’ve read and re-read the description for more times than you care to admit. You don't know if it’s good enough. If you’re good enough. But for the first time in a long time, you do it anyway.
And then you don’t tell anyone.
Maybe it’s selfish, but you want the hope for yourself. Just for a little while. You want to keep it quiet and sacred, untainted by expectations or well-meaning encouragement or the crushing weight of what if it doesn’t happen. You just want it to be yours.
You keep seeing Yoongi, of course. When he can. When he’s not tangled up in late-night meetings and studio sessions. You see each other in stolen hours, sleep-heavy kisses, lazy dinners eaten on the floor.
But lately, even those small moments feel bigger.
And then one night, you get a text.
Yoongi: You home?
You are. You say yes.
He shows up ten minutes later, breathless, hoodie damp from trying to dodge light rain, cheeks flushed with joy. Real joy. The kind that lights his whole face from the inside out.
“I had to tell someone,” he says the second you open the door. “I had to tell you.”
You let him in, confused but smiling all the same. You’ve been doing a lot of that lately. “What happened?”
He doesn’t even sit. He paces back and forth, rakes a hand through his hair, practically vibrating.
“We signed someone,” he finally says. “Tentatively, but, this artist from Busan, she’s insane, she’s so weird and good and her voice is like—fuck, I don’t even know how to explain it. But Namjoon loved her. We all did. And she said yes. She said yes, to us.”
You blink, stunned. “You—Yoongi, that’s—holy shit!”
He grins, wide and unguarded, and you’ve never seen him like this before and it just makes you so fucking happy. You’re up on your feet before your brain catches up.
You hug him tight, breath caught in your throat. Because he’s shaking a little, and he smells so good, and this is what he looks like when he’s proud of himself. When he’s living.
You pull back to look at him, hands on his jaw.
“I’m so proud of you,” you whisper.
And Yoongi’s expression shifts. Softens. Deepens. He takes a breath.
“I love you,” he says.
Like it’s not sudden. Like it’s been sitting on his tongue for weeks, waiting for the right moment to fall out.
“I just—I do. And I didn’t want to say it while things were still messy, or early, or whatever. But this is what I wanted. That night, at the convenience store. This. You. Someone who gets it. Someone who doesn’t fix me but lets me stay. And I love you.”
Fuck. There it is.
You don’t speak right away. You reach for him instead. Pull him back in. Rest your forehead against his and let yourself feel it. All of it.
And then, soft and steady, you say it back.
“I love you too.”
✧
It’s not frantic, not this time.
Not messy or rushed or born of need. It’s slow, reverent, deep. Yoongi’s hands cradle your face like you’re something fragile, something he’s terrified of breaking now that he knows what you mean to him. His thumbs stroke your cheeks. His breath catches when you tilt your head and kiss him harder but just as slow, open-mouthed and aching.
You walk him backwards toward the bed. He lets you. He goes willingly, grinning against your mouth like he can’t believe this is happening again, that you’re his, and that this time, it’s not just comfort or heat or distraction. It’s love.
He sinks onto the mattress, and you climb over him, straddling his lap, kissing him again and again, hands tangled in his hair, grinding down against the hard line of his cock through his sweats.
But then he pulls back. Barely. His hands settle on your thighs. His eyes are dark and shining and hungry.
“Let me eat you out.”
Your breath catches.
“I—what?”
Yoongi licks his lips. “You don’t get it,” he says, too far gone to filter it. “I’ve been wanting to. Since the night I fingered you against your fucking door, I’ve wanted to get between your thighs and just live there. I love you, and I love your pussy, and I’m gonna make you come so hard you forget every single bad day you’ve ever had.”
You stare at him, slackjawed.
Then you exhale, soft and wrecked, and whisper, “Okay.”
Yoongi repositions you onto your back, gentle, lips back on yours. His hands slide down your body like he’s mapping out every inch. He tugs your shirt off, unhooks your bra, kisses down your neck, your chest, your ribs, like he has all the time in the world.
And then he pulls your shorts down. Your panties too.
He groans when he sees you. Like, actually groans.
“God, baby. Look at you.” He kisses your inner thigh, drags his nose along the crease, eyes flicking up to yours. “So fucking pretty.”
And then he licks into you.
You cry out, sharp and sudden, because it’s so much. He’s warm and wet and greedy, tongue flat against your clit, then pointed and precise, then everywhere, like he can’t choose, like he doesn’t want to.
He moans against your pussy like he’s the one being touched. Like he could cum just watching you feel good, because of him.
“Yoongi—shit—” Your hands fly to his hair, thighs trembling, already shaking, already close.
He wraps his arms under your thighs, holding you open, keeping you grounded, mouth working you over like he’s worshipping you. He sucks on your clit, gentle but firm, and you arch off the bed.
“I’m gonna come,” you warn, voice breaking. “Fuck, Yoongi—”
He groans, messy and eager, never once letting up. And then you do.
You come hard, thighs clamping around his head, hands in his hair, eyes rolled back. It’s hot and overwhelming, your body jolting and twitching, his name a broken whimper on your tongue.
He keeps going until you push him away, overstimulated and trembling.
“Jesus,” you breathe.
He grins, climbs back up your body, presses his mouth to yours without hesitation. You taste yourself on his tongue.
“You love me,” he murmurs, like it’s the best thing he’s ever been told.
You nod, dazed. “I do.”
He kisses you again.
“You’re gonna let me do that every day, right?”
You laugh, breathless. “If you keep doing it like that, yeah. I might not survive, but yeah.”
You let Yoongi kiss you for a while, slow and soft and full of so much love, but eventually, you push at his shoulder. He pulls back instantly, eyes wide and brows furrowed.
“Lie down,” you murmur. “Let me take care of you.”
Yoongi blinks, lips swollen and wet. But he lets you push. “Baby—”
“You’ve been working so fucking hard,” you say, crawling into his lap, straddling his thighs. “Let me ride you. Let me make you feel good. Please.”
Whatever protest he might’ve had dies in his throat the second you reach down and palm him through his sweats. He’s hard—has been since he had your pussy on his tongue—and he groans, low and helpless, as you slide your hand beneath the waistband.
You stroke him slow, loving, watching the tension bleed out of him with every pass of your fist.
“Fuck,” he whispers, eyes fluttering shut, hips twitching into your touch. “Feels good.”
You smile. Kiss his chest as he fumbles for the condom in his wallet.
When you finally sink down onto him, Yoongi lets out a groan. His hands fly to your hips, gripping hard, eyes squeezed shut, jaw clenched so tight you can see the tension in his neck when he leans his head back.
“God—” he gasps. “Fuck, baby, you—”
“I know,” you breathe, grinding your hips in slow, careful circles. “I know. Just relax. Let me do this for you.”
You ride him slow, deep, dragging his cock through your tight, wet heat over and over. Every inch of him feels like it was made for you, thick and perfect and pulsing inside you, your cunt already fluttering from how good he made you feel earlier.
Yoongi can’t keep still. His fingers squeeze your thighs, your hips, then your waist, like he can’t decide where to hold on. Like he’s barely holding on at all.
He opens his eyes to look at you and whines, higher than he probably meant to. Because you’re riding him like you love him. Because your tits are bouncing with every slow roll of your hips, and your face is flushed, and your eyes are locked on his like there’s nowhere else you want to be in the entire fucking world.
It springs him into action.
He sits up, wraps his arms around you, mouths at your tits like he’s starving. He sucks at one nipple, then the other, licking and kissing and biting softly like he can’t stop, like he needs to touch you.
“Yoongi,” you gasp, fingers tangling in his hair.
He moans into your chest. Hands moving down to your ass, guiding you up and down on his cock in that same slow, dirty rhythm, like he wants to make this last forever.
“Can’t even think,” he pants. “You feel so fucking good—too good—fuck, I love you—”
You ride him harder, faster, your hands on his shoulders. Your whole body shakes with how good it feels to be full of him, to see him like this—wrecked, undone, yours.
“I’m so close,” you whisper, hips stuttering. “Yoongi—”
“Come for me,” he begs. “Please, baby, come on my cock, wanna feel it.”
You do.
You fall apart in his arms, gasping his name, pussy clenching around him so tight it nearly rips the orgasm out of him too. You’re shaking, sweating, still grinding through it as he buries his face in your neck, groaning your name, fucking up into you just a little, just enough—
He comes with a low, broken ‘fuck,’ arms locking around your waist, cock pulsing inside the condom. He’s so loud, so needy, and god, you’ve never loved anyone like this.
You collapse against his chest, both of you breathless and slick with sweat, still joined, still trembling.
And Yoongi holds you like he never wants to let go.
✧
You stay like that for a while, pressed to his chest, his arms strong around your back, the rhythm of his heartbeat still racing under your cheek. The room smells like sweat and sex. Yoongi’s hand is stroking slow lines up and down your spine.
He hasn’t said much since you both came down, but the silence isn’t uncomfortable. Just full.
You’re the one who breaks it.
“I did something,” you admit.
Yoongi hums, not missing a beat in the way his fingers trace over your skin. “Yeah?”
You nod against his chest, then force yourself to sit up, just enough to look at him. His hair’s a mess. His eyes are half-lidded and lazy, but sharp with attention the second he realizes you’re serious.
“I applied to grad school.”
Yoongi blinks.
“For writing?” he asks.
You nod again, heart hammering. “Yeah. An MFA. I submitted a portfolio. Finished something for the first time in forever. I would’ve told you sooner, I just—” You shrug. “I didn’t want to jinx it.”
His mouth opens. Then closes. Then opens again, like he’s still processing.
And then he grins. Slow. Genuine. Gums showing and eyes shining.
“Holy shit,” he breathes, sitting up and grabbing your face in both hands.
Your eyes sting. “I don’t even know if I’ll get in. It’s probably stupid—”
“It’s not,” he cuts in, firm and quiet. “It’s not stupid. It’s huge.”
You try to look away, but he keeps your face in his hands, thumbs brushing your cheeks, grounding you.
“I’m so fucking proud of you,” he says. “Seriously. I’ve watched you try so hard to find something again, and you did it. Whether or not you get in doesn’t matter. You tried. That’s fucking everything.”
You bite your lip, blinking fast. Yoongi kisses your forehead, then your nose, then your mouth.
“Thanks for telling me,” he murmurs. “I’ll keep it safe.”
And you know he will.
For the first time in a long time, the future doesn’t feel so terrifying.
✧
The email comes on a Wednesday.
You’re not expecting it. You’ve nearly forgotten the timeline, pushed it into the back of your mind like a daydream you didn’t want to get too close to. You’ve been telling yourself not to hope too much. Not to want it, even though you do. Badly.
It hits your inbox around 11:42 a.m., and you stare at the subject line for a full minute before you open it. And then—
You’re in.
You read it twice, then two more times. It still doesn’t feel real. You read the phrase We’re pleased to inform you like it’s in another language. Like it’s not something anyone was ever supposed to say to you.
Then you laugh. A startled, breathless sound that turns into something half-sobbing.
You call Yoongi.
He doesn’t pick up on the first try—he’s a busy man these days—but he calls back two minutes later.
“Hey, baby. What’s—?”
“I got in.”
There’s a long pause.
And then, softly, “what?”
You swallow hard. You’re pacing your kitchen now, barefoot and trembling. “I got in. Grad school.”
“Holy fuck.”
You laugh again, breathless. “I know.”
“Holy fuck.”
“I know! Yoongi—”
“You got in,” he says. “You fucking got in.”
He sounds like he’s smiling. Like he’s trying not to cry. You’re trying, too.
“I’m so proud of you,” he says. “So fucking proud of you. I’m gonna lose my mind.”
Your throat tightens. “I don’t know what to do now.”
“Come to the studio,” he says instantly. “No one’s here today except me. I’ll order food. I’ll roll a joint. I’ll kiss you a lot. Do some very dirty, celebratory things to you on the desk, if you want.”
You’re already grabbing your keys. “Okay. Yeah.”
“Meet me out back.”
When you get to the studio, he’s outside. Leaning against the back of the building, waiting. The joint is already rolled, tucked neatly behind his ear, and he’s got that look on his face—that slow, lazy grin.
“You,” he says, pushing off the wall the second he sees you. “Fucking you.”
You don’t say anything. Just drop your bag on the cracked concrete and launch yourself into his arms.
He catches you easily, wraps you up in him—hoodie and warmth and the faint smell of cigarettes and detergent and Yoongi. His arms curl tight around your waist, and he lifts you slightly off the ground as you bury your face in his neck.
“You got in,” he murmurs again. “You really—baby, you did it.”
You nod against him, laughing and sniffling all at once. “I did.”
He sets you down but doesn’t let go. Just pulls back enough to kiss you. Once. Twice. Then a third time, slower. Deeper. Like he’s trying to memorize this version of you—buzzing and breathless and so fucking proud of yourself.
When he finally pulls away, he grins and taps the joint behind his ear.
“Celebration?”
You nod. “God, yes.”
He lights it. Takes a drag, passes it to you, and you both sit on the loading dock out back, knees bumping, fingers laced, smoke around your heads. The sun’s low in the sky. It’s chilly, but you don’t feel cold. Not with his hand in yours.
And everything’s… okay. Not fixed. Not perfect. But better.
Because loving Yoongi didn’t save you, and you didn’t save him. You still have bad days. Panic attacks. Guilt. Long, unbearable silences you have to claw your way out of. He does, too. Life is still life.
But he holds your hand through it.
And when things are good—like now, like this—you feel it in your bones: you love him. You fucking love him.
You lean into his side, head on his shoulder, and you think:
I can do this. I can live this life.
Especially if he’s in it.

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@gelijar @livi101ful @annyeongbitch7 @pitchblack0309 @goldietigers294
@hopegdbbggloss @kam9404 @jajabro @parapiop7 @mar-lo-pap
@tarahardcore @butterymin @svnbangtansworld @rainnamu @auroradamned
@mintedagustd @angellekookie @watchingover-hypegirl @slytherinatheart
#best laid plans#yoongi x reader#min yoongi x reader#suga x reader#min yoongi x you#yoongi x you#suga x you#min yoongi x y/n#yoongi x y/n#suga x y/n#min yoongi fanfiction#yoongi fanfiction#suga fanfiction#min yoongi fanfic#yoongi fanfic#suga fanfic#min yoongi angst#yoongi angst#suga angst#min yoongi smut#yoongi smut#suga smut#min yoongi fluff#yoongi fluff#suga fluff#bts fanfiction#bts fanfic#min yoongi scenarios#yoongi scenarios#suga scenarios
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Hey can you do one where the reader and Tim is in the middle of having s*x and Tim gets a phone call from his job in metro and he answers the phone while he is still inside of her
Duty Calls
Tim Bradford x reader
Warnings/Tags: 18+, mdni!, smut, unprotected p in v (wrap it before you tap it!)
Word count: tba
Authors Note: Hello love, thanks for the request! Hope you'll like it!
Enjoy!

You flinched, as his phone went off again.
"Maybe you should answer it." you suggested breathlessly, on the verge of a moan. He grumbled something against your neck, nibbling at the sensitive skin.
When his phone went silent again, his grip on your hips tightened, his movements becoming faster. You moaned his name, your own grip on him tightening as well.
"Tim." you moaned his name, hips coming up to meet his. "Please, don't sto-" you were cut off when his phone went off again, and he groaned.
His head left the crook of you neck, as he fished for the intruder, his pace never once faltering. He glanced at you, before he pressed the answer button, holding the phone against his ear.
Your eyes went wide and you pushed against him, trying to make him stop. Biting on your lip to hold back a moan, his pace stayed the same, though.
"Yeah?" he spoke into the device, surprisingly calm despite the pleasure coursing through his body with every thrust of his hips. "Sure, when?"
Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, as he shifted his hips slightly, now hitting that sweet spot of yours that had you see stars with each thrust.
His brows and lips twitched, as he held back a moan of his own, as you clenched around him. "Okay, what will we find there?" he spoke, his other hand tightening its grip around your waist for leverage.
Your hand slipped between your lips, biting down to keep quiet, as a moan rumbled through you.
His lips twitched again, eyes fluttering, as he somehow managed to increase his pace. "Yeah, sure. Send me the location. What about the others?" he spoke, clearing his throat, and your breathing hitched at how close you were.
You tried to hold off on it, as he leaned more forward, elbow propped on the mattress, phone still pressed to his ear. He was so close you could hear his boss.
Head thrown back, your brows knitted in pleasure, biting down on your hand again to stay quiet.
He hummed into the phone, trying desperately to keep his breathing in check, as he felt himself near his climax as well.
"Yeah I- I'll be there." he pressed out, before hanging up, throwing the phone to the side. His now free hand gripped your thigh, moving you against him with every thrust.
"Metro." he breathed out, panting. Your hand slipped from your mouth, making way for a sinful moan, his name on your parted lips.
You nodded, back arching.
"I'm so close!" you breathed out, moaning again. He nodded in return, pace quickening even further. "Me too." he pressed out through clenched teeth, groaning in pleasure. "Me too."
He watched the way your tits bounced, as his phone went off again. Your body chose the exact same moment to let the coil in your belly snap, pleasure coursing through you with a cry of his name.
Your orgasm triggered his own, and he spilled himself into you, moaning and groaning your name, riding you through it, before he stilled.
Panting, your head fell back into the pillows, as his phone went silent again.
"I'm gonna have to go now." Tim breathed out, trying to catch his own breath. You nodded, as your own phone went off.
Groaning, your arm covered your eyes.
"Me too."
Tag List
@newobsessionweekly @laheysfilm
@augustvandyne @rookietrek @dhunhdchrih
@nachofriess @wonderland2425
@dtftheavengers
#the rookie#the rookie imagine#the rookie x reader#the rookie x u#tim bradford#tim bradford x reader#tim bradford x you#tim bradford imagine#imagine#tim bradford smut#request
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𝓛𝓸𝓯𝓲 𝓛𝓾𝓼𝓽 ♡

{ Pairing } - Producer.bf!Jisung x afab.gf!reader
{ Genre } - NSFW; s/f/d(dark)*, PWP, established relationship
{ Synopsis } - Your boyfriend doesn't know any other method of stress relief, other than creating music. He can get so consumed by it, it can become the stressor. So you decide to present him with a new method. That's how you found yourself walking down the street in nothing but lingerie and a long coat.
{ WC } - 2.9k
{ Warnings & Tags } - 18+ MDNI, *forced orgasm/slight dubcon if you squint, everything is consensual but there is begging for more when reader might be at her limit so that's why I'm including dubcon (for those who may find it triggering)*, use of pet names (baby, angel, mine, my love, good girl & Ji), very lowkey needy/soft dom & romantic sub dynamic, worshipping reader, oral (f. recieving), squirting, overstimulation, unprotected piv (do as I say & not as I write, pee after sex too!), creampie, cum feeding & eating, fingers in mouth, pussy worship, I may just have gotten carried away with oral fixations okay? FORGIVE ME.
{ Disclaimer } - This work is in no way associated or depicting the actual life of the members of SKZ. It is a fictional piece of work, and I do not own Stray Kids. All works of fiction are loosely inspired by SKZ, and in no way am I saying it is true to their character.
{ A/N } - I originally was going to post a Hyunjin oneshot next, but I wanted to finish this one in time for Jiji's birthday! It's 2 am on the 14th where I am heheh. Hopefully you all like it. Han producing music will always be hot asf for me personally lmao. Barely proofread.

The air was cool, seeping underneath your long wool coat. In any other circumstance, on a late fall night, the coat would be enough to keep the chill out. Today however, it wouldn't. But you still kept walking, determined to make it to Jisungs studio.
You focused on the clicking of the heels on the boots you wore. And the sound of the wind picking up, signalling a blustery night ahead. The small sounds calm your nerves.
You were anxious about Jisung's reaction, he was in one of his moods again. You understand, you truly do. Juggling everything he has to on his plate, it was no easy feat. There were times he'd just let that dark veil take over, and shut everyone out without even meaning to.
You knew he was in that state again when you hadn't seen or heard from him in three days. It wasn't for lack of effort on your end either. Every phone call sent to voicemail, every text sent by you was met with the same response;
'At the studio, I'll text you after, angel'.
You knew it was time for intervention when Chan texted you that he was only coming home, at 2 in the morning no less, to shower and change. No eating, no resting, just back to the studio afterwards.
This had happened twice before in the almost year you've been dating. Each time you remember talking with him afterwards, he always said the same thing;
'making music is my stress relief.'
That may be true, but it doesn't change the fact that he is also a workaholic. One who easily gets lost in the creative space he has built a career off of. And once that diligence sets in, it's hard to shake off.
So here you are, ready to try a new approach. Ready to offer a new kind of relief. An alternative.
You and Jisungs sex life was far from boring. Far from infrequent, you'd say too. But it surely was more... monotonous. You'd never complain about it, and neither would he. There was nothing wrong with it. It just happened at the 'perfect' times in your relationship.
Before bed, after date nights, on monthly anniversaries, to express massive amounts of love, etc.
It was never to celebrate happiness, calm anger, or comfort sadness. Never to relieve stress.
You were determined to change that. There was no reason you could not help him in any way you could. And in this aspect, you knew you could.
Still, you were nervous. This would be new, he never did well with new.
Your footsteps stopped, leaving only the sound of the wind in your ears. Until you pressed your badge against the card reader, listening to the beeps, to the gears unlock.
Once inside the lobby, the clinking of your heels against the vinyl tile filled your ears. Each step matches the thumping in your heart, you find yourself speed walking.
You smiled and gave a little wave to the staff in the lobby, and they returned it.
In the elevator, the sound of its melodic music filled your ears next. The whirring background noise the machinery made, stopped, as you reached your desired floor.
There was silence when you stepped off. The flooring is carpeted now, and soundproof rooms lined the hallway leaving the night quiet.
You took a deep breath and made your way to the door you knew was your boyfriend's. It was unlocked, thankfully.
You let yourself in, seeing the silhouette of your boyfriends back facing the door in the blue lighting.
He was all about ambiance in this facet of life, having LED's lining the ceiling. The only source of light in the room, besides the glowing screens of his monitors.
He was sat in his chair, headphones on, hood up, head nodding in tandem with his fingers tapping.
You took the opportunity to slide your boots off. Opting to keep your coat on, you brushed your hair over one shoulder. You took your badge from around your neck, and tossed it on the leather couch that was against the wall.
Padding your way over to him, you place your hand on his shoulder lightly. He tenses under your touch, and turns his head. He's frowning when he first faces you, eyebrow furrowed together.
When he sees you though, he softens. The corners of his mouth slightly upturning to a small smile.
"Baby..." He whispers, sliding his head phones off. Soft lofi music is filling the room from them.
He grabs your hand off his shoulder, bringing it to his lips. He's pressing soft kisses to your palm, and placing it on his cheek.
"It's late my angel, why are you here?" He says in a husky voice with more volume.
Your heart flutters at his gentleness, and you bend down to press your own lips to the top of his head. A musky, yet spicy vanilla scent fills your nostrils. His scent.
"I'm here to help you baby." You murmur to him softly.
That caught his attention. He fully swivelled around to face you, taking both of your hands in his. He gazed up into your eyes, a curious look on his face.
You smiled down on him, feeling nothing but love for this man. You'd relax him in any way you can. You placed a hand on each side of his face, bending down again. No more words were said as you kissed him. As your hands slid down his neck, his found themselves on yours, pulling you closer to him. Matching your eagerness.
You let your hands fully slide off him, and tilted your head to deepen the kiss. Your trembling fingers were working the buttons on your coat. One by one, releasing the fabric from your bare skin.
You stood up, letting the coat fall from your shoulders.
Jisung lets out a soft gasp, and licks his lips.
Exposed to him, was his favorite lingerie you owned. It was a bra and panty set, satin and lace. Revealing.
All white.
Your boyfriends favorite part. He always said that the contrast against your melanated skin was a work of art. He joked about commissioning Hyunjin, if he didn't have to see you essentially naked.
So here you stood before him, presenting yourself to him. Silently willing him to do as he pleases. To take your body and use you to decompress. You were too nervous to say it.
He traces the swell of your breast with a finger, curving around the delicate lace. It's a simple touch, but it still sends a shiver down your spine. Goosebumps blooming on your skin.
"So sexy." He mumbles, eyes roving your whole body.
He stands up, kissing you desperately, and walking you back to the couch. Your knees hit the back of it, and you're forced to sit. Lips ripping away from his, panting at the desire in his eyes.
All your nerves were gone. New or not, it would never change the fact that Jisung craved you as much as you craved him.
He held himself up with his hands on the back of the couch, and hovered above you for a moment looking you in the eyes.
Then he was sinking to the ground, on his knees, between your legs. His hands smooth over your thighs, making them pliant with soft kisses, before he spreads them open. Your pussy is glistening behind the lace, and he licks his lips again.
His hand glides from your thigh, to your heat. Thumb brushing against that sensitive bud, the friction eliciting a whine from you.
His eyes snap up to you, and he holds your gaze as his tongue licks a stripe up your clothed core. The tip of it flicking deliciously against your sensitive clit.
"Mmmm..." He groaned at the taste of you, "All for me?"
You moan at his tongue swiping against you again, and again, "All for you, my love."
His fingers hook underneath the band of your underwear, and he peels them off you. He's whimpering, watching as strings of your arousal stick to them. The cool air is hitting your sex, before puffs of hot air from his mouth is. And you're shivering again at the sensation.
A gasp escapes you when his tongue slides between your folds. Lapping up your juices, and suckling at that bundle of nerves. You listen to the wet sounds his mouth is making against you, along with the broken melody coming from his head set. You get lost in it.
Your hand finds his hair, and you're grinding against his mouth. He's whimpering and moaning with you, one hand palming at his bulge. The other has fingers teasing your entrance.
You let out a loud moan when two fingers push into you, and your grasp on his hair loosens. He takes the opportunity to get air, panting, mouth hanging open. His cheeks, chin and lips all shine in the dull blue light.
His fingers continue to pump into you as he watches your face contort for him. He's smiling with lidded eyes, basking in the fact that he's making you feel so good.
"Ji..." You moan, needing more.
"My beautiful baby, let me worship you a little longer." And he's diving back down.
His tongue focuses on your clit, and fingers coaxing that gummy spot inside you. He's pulling moan after moan from you, making out with your lower lips, bringing you closer to the edge. Your thighs start trembling around his head, and he has to grip the fleshy part of one of them to stop you from squeezing him before he's finished.
You're spilling over the edge, body alight and your release coating his fingers, and face. He's lapping up every little bit, determined to taste your pleasure on his tongue. Only when you start to whine from constant overstimulation does he stop.
He's kissing his way up to your lips, leaving a wet trail behind him that you couldn't bring yourself to care about.
You're not sure when he managed to discard his pants and boxers, but you feel his hard, bare length pressing against your inner thigh.
He's rubbing his member against your pussy now, letting your slick and his saliva cover him. Kissing your neck as he's rocking against you, he whispers, "Angel, do you have another one for me?"
Of course you did, you knew you did. You needed to feel him, you needed to please him. So you started nodding fervently, eyes rolling in the back of your head when he sucked lightly near your ear and jaw.
He had a grasp of his cock now, dragging the head through your folds with added pressure. Each squelch of your juices sounds like music to your ears, anticipation building in your body.
"'Gonna make you feel s'good." He's whining into your neck.
He has your legs around him now, as he fills you slowly, both of you savoring the sensations it brings. Your pussy spasms around him, and it has him grunting.
"Always feel so good squeezin' me..." He mumbled, letting you adjust, "...exactly what I needed..."
Then he was pumping into you, and you felt it. All the frustrations he was holding onto, all the stress, all the vexation. He was translating it into the energy he used to pleasure you. Letting go of it all.
You couldn't hear the soft lofi music coming from his head set anymore, instead the slapping of skin and heavy breathing mixed with moans were filling the room. You'd never be more thankful for a soundproof space. Neither of you were holding back.
Your moans only being interrupted by quiet curses, and his being peppered in between praises of how good you feel for him. He made it known he was chasing your high before his, begging you to cum for him.
"Please angel," he whispers against your lips, "need to feel you cumming on my cock."
His pace became quicker as he kissed you, and his hand slithered down to play with your clit. Your back arched off the couch at that, angling him deeper inside you. He groaned, and his thrusts faltered for a second indicating he was close.
Regardless he was determined to finish you, and his tone grew more demanding, "Be a good girl... cum for me, angel."
And that was all your body and mind needed to let go, legs locking around him and body shaking. Your hands slid under his hoodie, and nails dug into his back. It was the kind of intense orgasm, that your moan got stuck in your throat, instead a rough growl coming out.
You sounded absolutely feral for him, and you were.
That was what pushed him over the edge, a slew of curses leaving his mouth as his hips stuttered. With a final harsh thrust, he cums deep inside you. All of the negativity has dispersed from his body, and he collapsed back to his knees.
You're both panting, trying to catch your breath. You jolt when you feel his fingers in your folds, over sensitivity taking over yet again. He's spreading you open, hypnotized by the way his cum is drooling out of you.
"So perfect, fuck." He says as he drags his finger through it.
He's bringing it up to your lips, and your mouth opens instinctively. You're sucking his finger into your mouth, his essence salty but familiar on your tongue.
His eyes are locked to yours as you work his finger, licking it clean. He slips a second finger in your mouth, letting you cover them in your saliva before he dips back down for a taste himself.
You're whining around his fingers when his tongue glides against your clit, and your hips try to retract into the couch. Quickly, he has both hands on your hips, securing you in place so he can continue tasting you.
"We taste so good together, my love..." He's mumbling against you.
His words will never fail to coax submission out of you.
Your hand flies back to his hair, as good as it feels you're trying to pull him away. He's just burying his face deeper, tongue dipping into your entrance to make sure he's tasting everything.
"Ji... s'too much... I can't-" You're pleading, even though you feel yourself succumbing to the overwhelming brushes of his tongue.
He hisses when you finally succeed in pulling him off you, "Please angel," He's begging again, "Just one more. I know you have one more for me."
"Fuck, Ji, I-"
He silences you with his tongue flat against you, another lick up to your clit "Please, need to hear you cumming one more time for me." He whines and starts leaving sloppy, wet kisses on your pussy.
You always knew he was more of a giver. That even though it was you who had cum twice, and he only once. He preferred it that way. Even if he was the one needing the release more, he thrived more on your pleasure.
"Just be gentl-" You try to say, but cut yourself off with a groan.
He's eagerly slurping at your core. Lost in the moment, all he has is your pussy on his mind now. Messily licking and lapping at every inch. He's shaking his head and moaning into it, keeping you pinned in place by your hips.
You feel another orgasm starting to build quickly, clenching around nothing. He risks you bucking your hips roughly into his face, and takes a hand off your hip. He's pushing two fingers into you yet again, and you're seeing stars.
His fingers curl, and his lips close around your clit, sucking lightly. You feel your release slip away from you, and your cumming on his face again. Yelling his name. He only grows more determined.
He leans back so he can watch the beautiful, writhing, mess he reduced you to. The thumb of his other hand is replacing his mouth, continuously flicking your bud. He doesn't slow his movements as you ride out your orgasm, instead picking them up.
Your world turns white, and you feel yourself squirt on his hands. He's watching you in awe, whispering more praise for you as your juices spray over him.
"So fucking sexy, my good girl."
"That's it, let go for me, let it all go."
"Knew you had one more in you, all for me."
"My perfect angel."
It's when you start to slip into that floaty space that he finally stops. He doesn't want you too gone, he's limited in the care he can provide here.
He's positioning you to lay on the couch, and he's laying behind you. You're both wet and sticky, and heaving for air. Yet, it's blissful.
You lay there for what could've been minutes or an hour, you weren't sure. You were content in each other's touch. Your arm reaches back to caress his head, fingers combing through his hair. He's humming.
"I love you." You finally murmur.
"I love you more, angel. Thank you for this." He says, and kisses your shoulder.
"You caught on quickly to my idea." You giggled.
He laughed with you, "I caught on halfway through it, actually. I was just beside myself with desire for you."
You blushed at that, and you were thankful he couldn't see it.
"I mean you showed up in my favorite set..." He whispers and starts toying with the lace on your bra, his finger slipping underneath to flick your nipple, "In ONLY my favorite set. How could I not show you how much I admire you."
You felt his length harden against you again, and he rolled his hips slowly as he gripped your hip.
You knew the night was far from over.
As for how you were both going to escape and clean up? Well that was a problem for future you.

Taglist:
@eczlipse @sailor--sun @maisyyyyyy @jupire @prettiichocolateprincess
@meowmeowminnie @joyofbebbanburg @adieu-lisette @sleeping-beau-tay @staytinyluv
@lookitsjess @majorlymismanaged @kpopsstuffs @helloimacalumgirl @bbokarimenu
@bubblepop-stay @mauvemelon @ohhlittlegirl @ang4lheart @spnwinchestersd
@adieu-lisette @loud-minhoe @juwire @anylady-fics @antisocialties
@nebugalaxy @wowitsafemale
As always, please let me know if you'd like to join the taglist. And if you do, pretty please interact with my fics besides liking (ie; replying/commenting/reblogging). Although I will always appreciate liking as well! Feedback is always cherished! ♡
But again, please be gentle in your criticism! I am but a sensitive soul.
#han jisung oneshot#han jisung fic#han jisung fanfic#han jisung fanfiction#han jisung stray kids#han jisung skz#han jisung#han jisung x reader#han jisung x you#han jisung x y/n#han jisung smut#han jisung fluff#needy han jisung#dom han jisung#soft dom han jisung#sub reader#skz fanfic#stray kids fanfic#skz smut#stray kids smut#stray kids x y/n#stray kids x you#stray kids x reader#han jisung x female reader#stray kids x female reader#skz fluff#stray kids fluff#producer han jisung#pearlescynt fics
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The Prompts for Fictober 2024
Fictober Event, The prompts for 2024 Here is the list for October this year. Write something short (or long) and tag it with #fictober24 in the first five tags. Let’s see your creativity!
"that was good work"
"it's been a long time"
"I know you better"
"no, we're not doing that"
"it's a new day, let's go"
"I'm not giving up"
"follow me if you want to live"
"are we happy?"
"don't listen to me, listen to them"
"is this normal?"
"well, that worked out great"
"did you hear that?"
"that's not the point"
"did you stick to the plan?"
"let's try this"
"no, I'm not okay"
"strangest thing I ever heard"
"you always have a plan"
"this is getting ridiculous"
"I saw your eyes light up"
"we've done worse"
"why are we doing this again?"
"we can fix this, I know we can"
"you didn't do anything wrong"
"it consumes me"
"you were the first"
"let me remind you"
"just say what you want"
"how did this happen?"
"I won't let you down"
"it's always been you"
This event is open to fanfiction and original fiction. Start the first of October. You do not have to do the prompts in order. Tag your posts with #fictober24.
Please state at the top if your entry is original fiction or fanfiction and what fandom. State common warnings and triggers at the top and tag accordingly. No AI generated text or art.
I reserve the right to not reblog fics that I find inappropriate. I will reblog things here on @fictober-event, follow this blog to see all the entries. Go forth and write!

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Ratio, Dan heng, Jiaoqiu, Aventurine and Anaxa with a reader who got sick and now can't do anything strenuous cuz they can't take deep breaths and whenever they hug them, they can feel their chest wheezing when they inhale and they can also hear their strained breathing trying to breathe normally (yes I'm suffering inside...)
I wanna see them soothing their s/o with chest + back rubs (cuddles galoreee), feeding them any homemade recipes to soothe them and medicine too. Maybe scolding s/o whenever they forget to take medicine at the right time and reassuring them whenever it gets bad (coughing), promising them that it's gonna be ok and get better eventually🩵
🍮
A Promise of Healing
Tags: Aventurine x Reader, Dan Heng x Reader, Jiaoqiu x Reader, Ratio x Reader, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff & Angst, Cuddles Galore, Protective Partner, Soft Domestic Moments, Sick Reader, Back Rubs & Chest Rubs, Homemade Remedies, Reassurance, Scolding for Self-Care Neglect, Gentle Caregiving, Emotional Support.
Warnings: Depictions of illness and strained breathing (reader-specific), Slight angst (due to the reader’s condition and their frustrations), Possible emotional distress from the reader feeling vulnerable or helpless, Mild scolding (out of love), Comfort-heavy scenes with physical touch, Contains soft romantic moments.
A/N: I hope you get well by the time this fic comes out 🫂🫶💖

Ratio’s intense eyes studied you as you struggled to take even, steady breaths. He crouched beside you, his wavy hair falling into his face. "How many times," he began with an edge of exasperation, "must I remind you to follow your regimen? You’re brilliant, but even brilliance can’t excuse negligence."
You opened your mouth to respond, but a fit of wheezing overtook you, your body trembling as you tried to steady yourself. Immediately, his tone softened, and he guided you gently to sit on the couch, his hands supporting you as he positioned you against his chest. "Lean on me," he said quietly.
He rubbed circles on your back, his touch calculated and firm, his other hand trailing over your chest in soothing, rhythmic motions. “Your lungs are working too hard. You need to focus on shorter breaths—don't force it.” His voice was soothing now, like an anchor keeping you grounded.
As your breathing steadied, Ratio reached for the bowl of soup he had prepared earlier, infused with an assortment of herbs known for their restorative properties. “I’ve designed this specifically to soothe your respiratory tract. It may not be as groundbreaking as my usual work, but its efficacy is indisputable,” he said, holding the spoon up to your lips.
When you hesitated, embarrassed by your dependence, he raised a brow. “Don’t be ridiculous. You’d lecture me if I neglected my health. Now open your mouth.” You complied, savoring the warmth of the soup.
Later that evening, when you forgot to take your prescribed medicine, Ratio’s sharp voice rang through the quiet of your shared home. "Do I have to personally supervise you every hour?" he scolded, pulling you gently into his arms. Yet, his lips brushed your temple. "You’re going to recover, love. I won’t allow anything else. I’ll see to it myself."
You drifted to sleep against him, soothed by the rhythm of his hand on your back and the quiet strength of his presence.

Jiaoqiu’s hands, soft yet steady, traced soothing lines down your back as you struggled to catch your breath. His sharp ears twitched at the sound of your wheezing, and though his eyes remained closed, his expression was full of concern. “I told you not to push yourself,” he said softly, his voice laced with gentle reproach.
You tried to apologize, but the effort to speak only triggered a coughing fit. Jiaoqiu immediately shifted closer, his tail curling around the both of you protectively. “Shh, don’t speak. Just focus on breathing slowly. I’m here,” he murmured, his tone like a balm.
He adjusted your position so you were reclining against his chest, one hand continuing its comforting motion across your back while the other cradled your side. "I know it’s frustrating," he said quietly, "but healing takes time. You can’t rush it. Trust me—I’ve been through worse, and I’m still here, aren’t I?"
Once you’d calmed, he reached for a steaming bowl of congee he had prepared earlier. “Here. It’s my own recipe. The herbs I added should help you feel less strained.” Carefully, he guided the spoon to your lips, his patience infinite.
When you forgot to take your medicine later, Jiaoqiu sighed deeply, his fox ears drooping. “You can’t keep doing this to yourself, love. I may not be able to see, but I can hear your struggles. Every wheeze, every cough—it pains me more than you realize.” He found your hand and pressed it to his chest, his voice trembling just slightly. “You’re going to get through this. You have to. Not just for yourself, but for me.”
He held you close that night, whispering soft reassurances until you fell asleep, his hands never ceasing their gentle rubs across your back.

Dan Heng’s sharp eyes darted toward you as you clutched your chest, struggling to breathe. In an instant, he was by your side, his usually stoic demeanor softening with concern. "You’re pushing yourself again," he said quietly, though there was no mistaking the worry in his voice.
He helped you settle on the bed, his arms guiding you with care. “Lie back,” he instructed, placing one hand on your chest to feel your strained breathing and the other on your back, rubbing slow, steady circles. “You need to relax. I know it’s hard, but panicking will only make it worse.”
His voice was calm, grounding you as he leaned closer, his presence reassuring. When your breathing steadied, he retrieved a small bowl of tea infused with medicinal herbs he’d prepared earlier. “Drink this. It will help soothe your lungs.”
You hesitated, and Dan Heng’s brows furrowed. “You need to stop being so stubborn. I’m not going to let you suffer when there’s something I can do to help.” His tone was firm but gentle, and you couldn’t help but comply.
Later, when he caught you skipping a dose of your medicine, he fixed you with a rare frown. “You’re not invincible, no matter how much you want to believe you are,” he said, his voice tinged with frustration. But when he saw the guilt in your eyes, he sighed, his expression softening.
He pulled you into his arms, pressing a kiss to your temple. “I know it’s hard. But you’re going to get better. I’ll make sure of it. You just need to trust me—and yourself.”
That night, he held you close, his hands never leaving your back, the steady rhythm of his breathing lulling you into a peaceful sleep.

Aventurine’s eyes glinted with a mix of concern and frustration as he caught you clutching your chest, your breathing labored. “Now, now,” he said, his voice smooth but tinged with worry. “What did I tell you about overexerting yourself?”
He guided you to the couch, his hands surprisingly gentle as he adjusted your position to lean against him. “There, take slow breaths. I’ve got you.” His fingers worked expertly over your back and chest, the soothing motions designed to ease your discomfort. “You’ve got to stop scaring me like this, darling. It’s bad for my heart.”
When your breathing settled, Aventurine reached for the broth he’d prepared, its aroma rich and comforting. “Now, this is a special recipe,” he said with a teasing smile. “Made with love and a dash of sheer brilliance. Eat up, or I’ll be offended.”
Later, when you forgot to take your medicine, Aventurine’s usual charm gave way to exasperation. “Do you enjoy making me worry? Because you’re doing an excellent job of it,” he said, crossing his arms. But his frustration melted as he cupped your face, his voice softening. “Listen to me. I’ve gambled with a lot of things in my life, but I’m not willing to gamble with your health. Promise me you’ll be more careful.”
He pulled you into his lap, his hands resuming their comforting motions across your back. “You’re going to get through this, love. I’ll make sure of it. After all, I’ve never lost a bet when it comes to you.”
That night, he held you close, his warmth and quiet reassurances banishing your fears as you drifted off to sleep in his arms.

#x reader#honkai star rail#hsr#honkai star rail x reader#hsr x reader#hsr aventurine#aventurine x reader#hsr aventurine x reader#aventurine x you#ratio x reader#ratio x you#jiaoqiu x reader#jiaoqiu x you#jiaoqiu x y/n#dan heng x reader#dan heng x you#dan heng x y/n#established relationship#fluff and angst#cuddles galore#protective partner#back rubs and chest rubs#homemade remedies#reassurance#scolding for self care neglect#gentle caregiving#emotional support#hsr x you#hsr x y/n#hsr x gender neutral reader
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.ೃ࿐motherhood and matrimony I ch 2 𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪





ꨄ︎ pairing. au ceo! satoru gojo x single mom secretary fem! reader
ꨄ summary. satoru gojo, the arrogant and irresistible heir to a billion-dollar corporation and the son of your boss, the ceo... but when satoru’s father dies unexpectedly, his inheritance hinges on a stipulation: he must marry and have a child, but the child doesn't necessarily have to be his, right? together, you strike a deal: a fake marriage that promises financial stability for you and corporate control for him. as the lines between business and emotion blur, you must decide if your partnership is purely contractual or if it could evolve into something real.
ꨄ︎ warnings/tags. 18+ MDNI, nsfw, enemies (annoyances) to lovers, opposites attract, fake marriage, marriage of convenience, slow burn, smut, fluff, some angst, reader is single mom who recently broke off her engagement, satoru being a cute step dad, naoya is your crappy ex, triggers of prior domestic abuse (physical intimidation, emotional manipulation, from naoya)
ꨄ words: 12.5k
ꨄ a/n. firstly, wow thank you so much for all your kind words on ch 1 :") secondly, this series may be more than 3 chapters (maybe more like 4 or 5? - future aly here, lol what a joke. i thought this was going to be 3 chapters) idk i'm still working out the pacing rn bc i really want the relationship to feel fluid and natural. this chapter ended up being much longer than i anticipated 😅 but as always, i would love to hear your thoughts and hope you enjoy ♡
ꨄ taglist: open (ao3)
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ch 2 // under the spotlight

Becoming a mother makes you realize you can do almost anything one-handed—though honestly, sometimes you wish you had an abundance of limbs.
Especially now. Your apartment is a whirlwind of activity – scattered toys, half packed bags and the remnants of breakfast still on the table. You’re in the middle of prepping your daughter’s essentials, trying to make sure you don’t forget anything important. Her preferred snacks, extra clothes, diapers, and a few of her favorite toys all stuffed into a bag.
“Mama, mama, look!”
Haru’s innocent voice rings out like a melody amidst your morning clamor. Halting your frantic movements, you’re drawn to her face, lit up with pure joy as she holds up her beloved Pikachu plushie. The bright yellow toy bounces in her hands as she makes it dance.
Her innocence provides a brief, much-needed, calm to the storm of nerves brewing inside of you. After all, today’s the day you’re meeting with Satoru and his lawyer to finalize the marriage contract. Your marriage—weird.
It feels odd saying it, the word foreign on your tongue. Marriage is a concept you never thought you’d be rushing into, especially not like this.
Once upon a time, you thought you’d marry Naoya Zenin.
Back then, you were so in love with his charm, his confidence, and the way he seemed to have everything figured out. But reality had a way of shattering those illusions.
His charm turned to arrogance, his confidence to control. It wasn’t long before you realized he cared more about owning you than loving you, and now you’re left with nothing but heartache and a broken family.
But amidst your turmoil you found a precious gift—Haru.
Her infectious giggle is a stark contrast to the chaos within your mind—it always manages to pull you back from your whirlwind of worries.
You’ll do anything in your power to keep her smiling, even if that means marrying Satoru Gojo, the man who is guilty for an abundance of your headaches.
With a deep breath, you zip up your duffle bag and turn to Haru who is lovably babbling to Pikachu.
“Come here, sweetie,” you say, kneeling down with her small jacket in your hand.
She toddles over to you, clutching her comforting plushie, eyes wide and curious.
Easing her tiny arms into the sleeves, you gently help Haru into her jacket.
“We’re going to meet some new friends today,” you tell her softly, fastening the buttons with care. “One of them is named Mr. Gojo.”
“Mr. Gojo?” she echoes, face scrunching up in concentration.
Truth be told, you weren't planning on bringing Haru to this meeting, but you’re faced with a lack of options, especially since technically, you’re fired.
Well… temporarily.
Until Satoru rehires you, paying the nanny isn’t feasible with your already stretched finances, Utahime, your ever-reliable friend, is unavailable. Your neighbor, who sometimes steps in to help, is out of town, and your mom is… your mom – as undependable as ever.
At this point you'd rather be caught dead than call Naoya again.
Calling him yesterday, when your nanny bailed, was a moment of pure desperation, a lapse in judgment driven by the chaos of the day and the fear of getting fired. Not your proudest moment.
It’s no surprise he’ll likely use it against you—hold it over your head like a weapon. It’s a pattern you’re all too familiar with.
But today marks the beginning of a new chapter, one that you’re determined to make the best of for both you and your daughter—once this marriage is finalized, you’ll be back to earning a steady income again.
A sigh escapes your lips as you focus back on Haru, her innocent eyes look up at you expectantly.
“Yes, Mr. Gojo,” you repeat, giving her a reassuring smile as you reach down to tie her shoelaces. “We’re going on an adventure today, just you and Mommy.”
“An adventure!” Haru cheers, clapping her hands in unbridled excitement.
Just as you pull the last loop tight, a knock reverberates through the front door, startling you. It’s unexpected, you weren’t anticipating any visitors.
With a deep breath, you twist the handle and pull the door open. The sight that greets you sends a cold wave of dread crashing over you, your heart pounding in your chest.
Speak of the devil—Naoya.
He has an uncanny knack for impeccable timing, always appearing when he’s least wanted.
His presence is as imposing as ever—a smirk crowned on his lips, posture relaxed, hands in his pockets—exuding an air of ownership over everything that’s around him.
As if he owns you.
Damn it. You really can’t deal with this right now; you don’t have the time. Satoru is expecting you, and you need to get moving.
Leaning nonchalantly against the doorframe, he surveys you with that annoyingly smug expression plastered upon his face.
"Well, well, if it isn't my two favorite girls," he drawls, sarcasm dripping from his voice.
The frustration you feel from Naoya is vastly different from what you experience with Satoru. With Satoru, it's harmless—like dealing with a mischievous child. But with Naoya, every sight of him makes you want to flee, as if each encounter is a battle you barely survive. He reopens old wounds that never truly healed, leaving you raw and exposed.
Every fiber of your being screams in protest at the sight of him, but you force yourself to maintain composure—refusing to let him see the effect he has on you.
"What do you want, Naoya? I really don’t have time for this today."
Turning away from him, you begin gathering the last of Haru’s things with brisk, precise movements, making it clear you have no intention of prolonging this interaction.
He steps inside, smirk widening with satisfaction and tone laced with mock concern.
"Just thought I'd drop by and see how you're managing. Got your message. Heard you were looking for a babysitter yesterday.”
As expected—you’re really kicking yourself for calling him. His false sympathy only heightens your irritation, grating on your nerves as the condescension drips from his words like venom.
If you weren’t already leaving, you would slam the door right in his smug face.
Gritting your teeth, you attempt to keep your tone steady, for no one other than Haru.
"We're fine, Naoya. We don’t need your help."
In hopes to end this conversation quickly, you grasp Haru’s hand and attempt to brush past him. But he sidesteps, effectively forbidding your path to the door, looming like an unwanted shadow.
"Still as stubborn as ever, I see. How’s that working out for you?” he scowls as he peers through your apartment, “This place is a mess. And you don’t look like you’re dressed for work. Lost your job already?”
His words hit a nerve, you feel your cheeks flush with a mixture of anger and embarrassment.
"We are managing just fine. Now, if you'll excuse us, we have somewhere to be."
But he wasn’t going to let you go so easily. His expression darkens, and as you repeatedly try to step past him, he halts you yet again, blocking your way like an insurmountable wall.
"And where exactly are you going? Shouldn't you be at work today?"
"That's none of your business. I really need to go," you retort, lifting your chin assertively as you force your way past him. Your shoulder brushes against his in a deliberate act of defiance.
The moment you cast him aside, he immediately pursues after—but choosing to ignore him, you close the door behind you, turning the lock with a decisive click.
As you start leading Haru towards the elevator, you adopt a brisk pace in hopes to put as much distance between you and Naoya as possible.
But he raises an eyebrow, smirk widening as he traverses after you. You hear his footsteps echoing down the hallway of your apartment complex.
"Oh, I think it is my business. Especially when it concerns my daughter."
Oh, please.
It’s painfully ironic how he pretends to care about Haru only when it suits him.
After you served him child support papers, he had the audacity to demand a DNA test, claiming he needed ‘proof’ that Haru was his. Of course, something like that takes time for the judge to arrange.
He knew that damn well—it was just another ploy to delay the process further.
As anger bubbles up within you, a scoff escapes your lips, teetering on the edge of a bitter laugh.
"Oh, so she’s yours when it’s convenient for you. Don't pretend you care about Haru now. You’ve done nothing but make our lives difficult."
Your movements are sharp and frantic until you finally halt in front of the elevator. Just as you press the button to descend, Naoya’s presence descends over you—suffocating like a dark cloud, his face twisting into a menacing scowl.
"Maybe if you weren’t so damn stubborn, things wouldn’t be so difficult. You know, if you ever need help, all you have to do is ask," the insincerity in his voice makes your skin crawl—as his words slither into your ears, each syllable is laced with a condescending edge.
You scoff, jabbing the button over and over again with mounting urgency. Can this damn elevator come any faster?
"Help? From you? I'd rather figure things out on my own than rely on your 'help'."
He steps closer, making you feel small and cornered. It’s a familiar tactic he would use to get his way—the accustomed sense of intimidation he used to exert over you returns, chilling your spine.
"Suit yourself. Just remember, you can’t keep this up forever. Sooner or later, you’ll realize you need me again,” his voice drops to a low, threatening whisper, the underlying menace making it clear that he relishes the control he still believes he has over you.
Suddenly, you feel small tiny hands gripping tightly onto your leg. Haru’s wide eyes dart between the two of you, her innocent face reflecting a nervous unease that she can’t fully understand—but you do.
Fuck it. Enough is enough. You can't let this continue any longer—screw the elevator.
With a determined breath, you scoop Haru into your arms, feeling her trembling slightly against you. "Come on, sweetie," you say softly.
Her tiny heart beats against your chest, mirroring your own anxiety. Holding her close, you immediately head towards the stairway, your stride quickening.
But Naoya's presence lingers, his footsteps echoing ominously after you.
“Really, Naoya?”
Oh, this is it. Your patience is wearing thin—he’s like a growth you can’t get rid of.
You feel Haru’s grip tighten around your neck as she buries her face into your shoulder. You have been trying desperately not to yell, for Haru’s sake, but at this point, Naoya is overstepping your boundaries.
“Just go away. The only thing I need from you is to hurry up and finish that damn DNA test,” you shout, refusing to look back as you head towards the stairs. “There was no reason for that bullshit; you know Haru is yours. I know you’re just trying to stall our court date,” you snap, your voice trembling with frustration and anger.
Naoya’s eyes gleam with a cold amusement, and the corners of his mouth curl up into a mocking smile.
"Stalling? Hardly. You’re insane, I just want to be thorough. You should understand that, being so meticulous yourself," he sneers, tone derisively sweet.
Finally, you reach the stairway—beginning your descent, Haru clings tightly to you as Pikachu dangles precariously from each hurried step.
"This conversation is over, Naoya,” your voice echoes in the narrow space. “Stay out of our lives. I only want to see you in court."
Naoya contemplates following you, lowering himself a few steps before abruptly stopping. As his voice reverberates through the stairwell, his unsettling demand bounces off the cold concrete walls, chilling you to your core.
"For now, y/n. But remember, this isn’t over. Not by a long shot. You always come crawling back to me one way or another. You’re incapable of anything without me."
There was a time when you believed those words, but you will not fall back into that same vicious cycle.
Choosing not to respond, your resolve is sharpened with one clear goal, getting Haru and yourself out of this building as quickly as possible.
The moment you clear through the lobby door, a shaky sigh escapes your lips. This day is already starting off with a bang—hopefully it goes much better at Satoru’s.
Forcing a smile for your frightened daughter, you try to mask the tears welling up in your eyes—the tremor in your voice quaking.
“Come on honey, let’s go meet Mr. Gojo.”
Time to get this marriage finalized.
ꨄ︎
You had expectations of what Satoru’s house would be like, but even those couldn’t hold a light to the real thing—it’s a stark contrast to the modest apartment you call home.
The meticulously manicured lawn, the pristine arcadian, and the large, ornate door all showcase opulence.
It’s far more luxurious than you had imagined, making you feel distinctly out of place as you step out of your car in your worn jeans and t-shirt, hair pulled up in a lazy bun.
Wait…should you have come dressed businesslike?
But you have Haru—was this supposed to be a professional meeting? Fuck.
On top of everything else, you’re already a few minutes late. Tardiness has become a tiresome trend in your life, one that exhausts you to your very core.
Traversing the entryway, Haru grips your hand tightly as you walk through the stone pathway. Her fingers tremble slightly, perhaps from the unsettling encounter with Naoya, or perhaps from the overwhelming new environment.
Nerves simmer through you once you approach the doorway, but you resolve to mask them. You weren’t going to let Naoya ruin your day—this meeting is your chance to retake control of your life.
As you reach out and press the doorbell, a soft melodic chime resonates, echoing through the spacious foyer beyond.
Within moments, the door swings open, revealing Satoru.
You immediately feel a sense of relief as you observe him dressed surprisingly casual—a fitted blue t-shirt that accentuates his broad shoulders and lean frame, paired with dark jeans that hug his long legs. His snowy hair remains tousled in that effortlessly stylish way, framing his strikingly handsome face.
It’s impossible to advert your eyes as he greets you with that familiarly confident smile curling upon his lips, and those vivid blue eyes, enchanting you with an intriguing glint.
“Hm, late again, I see,” Satoru teases, dramatically placing a hand over his heart as if wounded with an exaggerated sigh. “I was starting to worry you wouldn’t show up. Here I was, thinking you might divorce me before we even get married—” he stops, lifting his brow as his gaze shifts to the small figure peeking out from behind your legs.
“Well, well, and who is this?”
Haru’s wide eyes are filled with curiosity and apprehension. She peeps out nervously, clutching her plushie’s worn, familiar fabric for comfort.
Satoru’s smile softens as he looks at the little girl, but a twinge of uncertainty tugs at him internally. Children were a mystery to him, their emotions and reactions unpredictable.
What should he say? How should he act?
A flicker of fear crosses his mind—what if he says the wrong thing and makes her cry?
Oh God…
The thought of dealing with a child's tears makes him feel out of his depth, a sensation he’s not accustomed to. Satoru finds himself in unfamiliar territory. He’s used to commanding rooms and negotiating high-stake deals, not interacting with shy children clutching stuffed toys.
But faking confidence has always worked in the business world, and he is determined to make a good impression now.
As you notice Haru’s uncertainty, you gently caress her head, delicately coaxing her out from behind your legs.
"It’s okay, sweetie. This is Mr. Gojo, can you say hi?"
There is an air about you—the gentle ease in your voice, the way you instinctively know how to comfort Haru. It stirs something within Satoru, something he can’t quite place.
All he knows it that now he really doesn’t want to fuck this up.
"I’m really sorry for bringing her along," you begin, tone earnest as you meet Satoru with an apologetic gaze. "I hope it’s okay. I just didn’t have anyone who could watch her today. But she’ll keep to herself during our meeting, I promise."
Satoru’s expression softens further as he looks at Haru, his uncertainty momentarily forgotten. She is so fragile, so docile. In her delicate features, he sees an uncanny resemblance to you—a small reflection of your strength and vulnerability intertwined.
“Oh, it’s no problem at all,” he reassures softly. Crouching down to her level, his toothy smile is warm and inviting. “Hi there, I’m Satoru. What’s your name?”
Haru looks up at you for reassurance, her small hand tightening around your leg. Encouraged by your nod, she turns back to Satoru and whispers tentatively—
“Haru.”
Satoru grins, captivated by the softness and delicacy of Haru's voice. Though he is uncertain how to connect with a child. His mind races—
What do kids like?
What should he say next?
While his thoughts scramble, a spark of an idea forms the moment he observes Haru clutching Pikachu.
“Nice to meet you, Haru. Do you like Pokémon?”
Haru nods, her grip on the plushie relaxing slightly. There is a subtle warmth behind the apprehension in her eyes as she holds up her Pikachu toy to show Satoru.
“Yes, Pikachu.”
“Pikachu is pretty cool,” he lets out a contemplative hum as he tries to find common ground. A faint nostalgic smile plays on his features. “But you know, Digimon is even better. Have you ever heard of Agumon?”
Haru’s eyes widen with curiosity as she shakes her head, her interest clearly piqued.
Satoru’s inner child shines through—eyes sparkling with a genuine enthusiasm as his lips curl up into a grin. This is his chance to bridge the gap between them.
“Tell ya what, maybe we can watch some Digimon together sometime. How’s that sound?”
You feel Haru’s grip loosen on your leg. A faint smile touches her lips and a quiet giggle escapes as her initial shyness begins to slowly fade.
“Okay.”
There are many thoughts that come to your mind as you watch this interaction play out—the foremost being how unexpectedly gentle Satoru can be with kids. Something about him, that overconfident and sometimes arrogant man you’ve worked beside, feels different now. Almost likable.
Charming, even
But what you really can’t fathom the most is the image of a sophisticated billionaire engrossed in a kids’ cartoon. That concept alone is enough to make you suppress a laugh.
“You’re a fan of Digimon?” you raise an eyebrow.
Satoru stands up, brushing off his knees with a nonchalant shrug and a crooked smile.
“I used to watch it all the time growing up. Please, come in,” he ushers you inside the building, leading you down the grand hall.
Your breath hitches at the sight of the expansive foyer. The high ceiling, polished marble floors, and impressive chandelier casting a warm glow leave you speechless.
Following behind him, you find yourself studying Satoru’s confident strides—the movement of his back, his broad shoulders and the effortless air of authority he exudes. It’s a stark contrast to what you just witnessed moments ago with Haru.
But that alone makes him even more intriguing to you. Satoru can feel a bit like a wild card. Glimpses of tenderness hidden behind feigned aloofness—subtle playfulness followed by an exacting seriousness.
He keeps surprising you.
“I wouldn’t have pegged you for a Digimon fan,” you remark as you follow behind him.
Satoru chuckles, scratching the back of his head.
“Guilty as charged.”
You can’t help but notice the way he avoids your gaze—is he perhaps being… bashful?
Oh, this is rich.
You really would need an abundance of limbs to count on your hands the amount of times Satoru has given you shit—making your life a daily torture is his specialty after all. Perhaps that is why you couldn’t resist letting this opportunity pass up.
“Next thing you’ll tell me is that you have a secret stash of Digimon cards somewhere,” you snort.
Satoru lets out a contemplative hum.
“Well, I did have a pretty impressive collection back in the day. Who knows, maybe I still have them tucked away in a drawer somewhere.”
“Seriously?” you are unable to hide the amusement in your voice. “You, with a collection of Digimon cards? That’s something I’d pay to see.”
He rolls his eyes with a pout tugging on his lips.
“You’re enjoying this too much. Maybe I’ll dig them out for you one day. But only if you’re nice.”
You scoff, shaking your head in disbelief.
“Me, nice to you? That’s a tall order.”
A faint chuckle leaves Satoru’s lips as the spacious foyer transitions into a grand hallway. Haru skips beside you, glancing up at Satoru with a newfound admiration.
The moment you reach a large set of intricately carved wooden doors, he pauses, turning to you with a reassuring smile before pushing them open.
Inside, a cozy yet sophisticated study awaits—shelves lined with books and a large mahogany desk dominating the room.
“Yo, Suguru,” he waves flippantly, “this is y/n and her daughter, Haru.”
Your eyes are met with a man seated behind the desk—a calm and composed air about him. He is strikingly beautiful, raven hair tied back into a bun with louse tousles framing his face. As he looks up from a stack of papers, his sharp yet gentle eyes focus on you and Haru. He rises, extending a hand with a polite smile.
“Pleasure to meet you both. I’m Suguru Geto.”
“Nice to meet you as well,” you shake his hand with a subtle nod.
The presence of another stranger causes Haru’s shyness to return as she hides behind your legs again—you kneel down, smoothing her hair gently.
“Haru,” you pull out a small bag of her favorite toys from your duffle bag, “why don’t you take a seat over there and play with your toys while Mommy talks with Mr. Gojo and Mr. Geto?”
With a light nod, Haru takes the bag and settles into a comfortable armchair in the corner of the room—spreading out her treasures with a look of concentration.
You take a seat across from Suguru, with Satoru sinking into the chair beside you—posture relaxed and seemingly indifferent.
“Alright, let’s get down to business,” Suguru leans forward, “I’ve drafted the marriage contract based on the discussions I’ve had with Satoru. I’ll walk you through the main points.”
Referencing the document upon the desk, he begins.
“Firstly, as you both know, the purpose of this marriage is strictly business-related with no romantic implications. Both parties agree to maintain the appearance of a committed relationship in public and professional settings.”
Okay, easy—right?
You nod, but in the corner of your eye you can see Satoru lounging back in his chair. The mild disinterest on his face and the nonchalant way he twirls a pen between his fingers makes you grit your teeth.
He carries a casual attitude—one you shouldn’t be surprised with at this point because it’s the same infuriating aura he brings to every business meeting. But in this case, it’s a stark contrast to the gravity of this conversation. Here you are, discussing marriage and he’s sitting here as if you’re determining what to eat for lunch.
Yup, nothing’s changed. He still aggravates the hell out of you.
“Next, the duration of the marriage is set for one year, starting from the date of signing,” Suguru continues. “There are provisions for extending or terminating the marriage early, should both parties agree.”
You absorb every word as you listen intently, but Satoru seems to be in his own world. It takes all your self-control not to roll your eyes as you catch him leaning back further into his chair, now balancing it on two legs. He taps his pen against his lip thoughtfully—an indifferent expression plastered across his face.
Is he even listening?
Here you are, about to commit to a fake marriage for the sake of your job and your daughter, and Satoru looks like a bored child.
You shoot him a sideways glance, silently willing him to take this more seriously, but the moment he catches your eye he simply offers a lazy wink, making your blood boil even more.
Suguru, unfazed by Satoru's demeanor, continues outlining the contract.
“The financial arrangements are next…Satoru will include a monthly allowance to you, y/n, to cover personal and household expenses. Both parties will maintain separate bank accounts, and any joint financial decisions require mutual consent.”
You blink in surprise. A monthly allowance?
Though you had asked Satoru to cover child care, you weren’t expecting this level of financial support. Isn’t that a bit excessive?
“Wait, what?” you blurt out, unable to hide your astonishment. “A monthly allowance? For personal and household expenses?”
Satoru’s chair drops back onto all four legs with a soft thud as he leans forward, finally showing a hint of interest. He raises an eyebrow at your reaction, a lazy smile curling his lips.
“We wouldn’t want you or Haru to struggle, now, would we?”
His words sound almost considerate, but it’s the casual way he says them that makes you question his sincerity.
“Some might see you being my secretary as a conflict of interest now. You’ll still work beside me, but I can’t give you a formal salary for that role. Doing it this way ensures that all you have to worry about is playing your part. Besides,” he adds, a hint of amusement creeping back into his voice, “what kind of husband would I be if I didn’t support my wife?”
Raising an eyebrow, you shoot him a wary look, trying to gauge his true intentions. It makes sense… but is he mocking you, or is this his way of showing genuine concern? With Satoru, it’s always hard to tell.
Suguru clears his throat, drawing your attention back to the contract.
“Moving on to the living arrangements, you will both reside in the marital home here.”
Satoru interrupts, tone almost too nonchalant as he leans back in his chair and lazily stretches, “I’ve already arranged for a moving company to pack your things in a few days. They’ll handle everything.”
You blink, the suddenness of it all sinking in.
“Huh?”
“Problem, sweetheart?”
“I... I didn’t realize I’d be moving in so… soon. What about my apartment? I have a lease, and breaking it will incur a penalty.”
He waves off your concern with a dismissive hand, leaning back further with hands casually behind his head.
“I’ll pay it. Consider it handled. No point in you staying there when you’re supposed to be living here.”
Your eyes widen, taken aback by his insouciant dismissal of what, to you, is a significant expense.
“You’re sure?”
“Of course. We need to make this look legitimate, and that means living together. Consider it part of the arrangement.”
To him, solving problems with money seamed effortless.
To you, this isn’t just a contract; it’s a complete upheaval of your life.
You’re starting to really feel the difference in your two worlds.
The abruptness is a bit overwhelming, and yet, Satoru seems to handle it with the same ease he applies to all his business dealings.
It’s a bit unnerving. It’s not that you aren’t grateful, but you can’t help but wonder…does he pity you? See you as a charity act?
Suguru, sensing your hesitation, interjects your thoughts with a soothing tone,
“It’s important for appearances that you both share a residence. It solidifies the arrangement in the eyes of your colleagues and the public.”
You take a deep breath, nodding again. “Right, I understand.”
Suguru nods, making a note on the document.
“Good. Now, let’s move on to the responsibilities and obligations. You’re both expected to attend public and social functions, maintaining the façade of a loving marriage.”
Satoru who still remains leaned in his chair, now has his head tilted back, looking up towards the ceiling.
"Oh, and by the way," he begins, eyes flicking to you while his posture remains unmoved, "we'll be getting married at the courthouse tomorrow to make things official on paper. Our public ceremony will be a grand affair, but it will come later to keep the media satisfied and appease everyone."
Tomorrow?
You give a hesitant nod, absorbing the rapid pace at which your life is changing.
“Alright…tomorrow.”
Suguru flips to the next page, “In terms of termination, either party can initiate it with a 30-day notice. Grounds for early termination include breach of contract or mutual consent. Upon termination, Satoru will provide a one-time settlement payment to you, y/n.”
You blink as Suguru pushes the contract towards you, the settlement amount highlighted in bold. Did Satoru add a few extra zeros by mistake? That number can’t be correct, right?
You glance up at Satoru, who is now inspecting his nails with a look of utter boredom.
“Is this…correct?” you ask, voice barely above a whisper.
Satoru looks up, meeting your eyes with a casual shrug.
“Yeah, it’s correct. Consider it a thank you for playing along.”
You shake your head slightly, trying to wrap your mind around the figure. This settlement could change your life, secure Haru’s future, and give you the stability you’ve been desperately seeking.
You could pay off your medical bills for the childbirth, could go back to school. Hell, you could be free of Naoya, you wouldn’t need him or his money.
You narrow your eyes, suspicious of his sudden generosity.
"And what’s the catch?”
Satoru chuckles, a lazy grin spreading across his face as he leans forward, resting his chin in his hand.
"Come on now, sweetheart. Just think of it as me taking care of my...business partner."
Suguru clears his throat, glancing between the two of you.
“Well, there is one additional detail, y/n. The settlement is contingent on maintaining a favorable public image. Any actions or behaviors that damage Satoru’s reputation would result in the forfeiture of all financial support and settlement funds.”
You blink, the implications dawning on you. Ah, of course there would be a condition—you knew better than to think he was just being generous.
“So… I’m responsible for upholding your image? What does that even mean?”
Satoru’s crooked grin widens.
“It means no scandals, no controversies. You play the part of the perfect spouse, attend events, smile for the cameras, and keep any...personal indiscretions out of the spotlight. Simple enough, right?”
Your stomach churns as you realize the depth of his control—you thought you were escaping Naoya’s grasp, but it seems control is still a prevalent force in your life.
This isn’t just a marriage of convenience; it’s a binding agreement that keeps you in line with his public persona, ensuring that any slip-up on your part will have dire financial consequences.
A part of you can’t blame him, though. It makes sense for him to take extra precautions. The Gojos have always been in the public eye, and there have been countless rumors about Satoru's refusal to settle down.
“What if something happens that’s out of my control? What if someone tries to smear my name?”
Satoru’s eyes harden slightly, though his smile remains.
“We’ll handle that on a case-by-case basis. But let’s just say I have ways of managing the media. You just need to play your part, nothing more.”
The calculated control in his tone, juxtaposed with his unwavering smile, makes your skin prickle with unease. The room feels suddenly colder, and a knot tightens in your stomach. You thought you were stepping into a partnership, but now it feels like a performance where one wrong move could cost you dearly.
Suguru interjects, his tone professional.
“This clause is essential for protecting both your interests and Satoru’s. Maintaining a positive public image is crucial for the success of this arrangement and for avoiding any complications that could arise from negative publicity.”
You take a deep breath—this was a gamble. The settlement would secure Haru’s future, your future, but your every move would be scrutinized, and any misstep could strip away the stability you desperately needed.
Your eyes wander to Haru, quietly and innocently playing with her toys. For her sake, you were willing to play Satoru’s game, even if it meant living under the constant pressure of his expectations.
“Alright,” you say firmly. “I agree to the terms.”
Satoru’s eyes flicker with satisfaction and Suguru leans forward sliding a pen towards you both.
“Good. If you both agree to these terms, we can proceed with the signing.”
You observe Satoru as he reaches for the pen—he is back to that usual air of nonchalance; it is almost unsettling. He signs the document with a flourish, barely glancing at the terms, and you envy his composure.
When he hands you the pen, meeting your eyes with a confident smile, you hesitate for a second—then, with a determined snatch, you take the pen from his delicate hand.
Holding your breath, you press the pen to paper and sign your name in one fell swoop. Each stroke of the pen feels heavy, final, but also strangely empowering.
No turning back now.
ꨄ︎
The courthouse ceremony was as brief and impersonal as you expected.
Something about Haru witnessing you legally enter into a fake marriage just didn’t feel right—so you opted to leave her with Satoru’s nanny.
Standing in front of the judge, reciting vows, and signing the official documents felt more like a business transaction than a wedding.
Glancing at Satoru, you couldn't help but feel a bit solemn as you observed him, his expression as indifferent as ever.
This wasn't the fairy tale wedding you once dreamed of. There was no crowd, no rings, no romantic gestures—just a legal agreement with a pen on paper, binding you to him for the next year.
But then again, you knew that coming into this—it was never about romance or dreams; it was about survival and securing a future for Haru.
It was over as quickly as it began—just like that, the judge declared you husband and wife, immediately leaving you alone with Satoru right after.
Noticing your serious expression, Satoru leans in slightly as you gather the official documents.
"You look like you're attending a funeral, not a wedding Mrs. Gojo," his voice drips with playful mockery.
Hearing him call you ‘Mrs. Gojo’ sends a shiver down your spine. That was going to take some getting used to.
“And you look like you’re at a board meeting, not your wedding, Mr. Gojo,” you retort, unable to hide the underlying bite in your voice as your fingers shuffle through the pages.
A deep chuckle reverberates through the otherwise solemn atmosphere. Once you tuck the documents under your arm, you begin to make your way towards the exit. Satoru immediately falls into step beside you.
“Touché. But really, lighten up sweetheart. Gonna need to work harder to convince everyone you’re head over heels in love with me,” there’s a playful challenge in his voice.
Rolling your eyes, you couldn’t help but let out a dry laugh.
“Well, forgive me for not swooning over this magical moment. You know, this isn't exactly how I pictured my wedding day," you mutter, trying to mask the internal melancholy whirling within you.
When you reach for the door, Satoru beats you to it, holding it open with a flourish.
"Oh? And how did you picture it?” he raises an eyebrow as his eyes gleam in amusement, “Let me guess, lots of flowers, a big white dress, and some poor guy professing his undying love for you?"
Okay, screw him. He was really not making this any better. You feel the heat rise to your face as a scoff escapes your lips—the only response you will give him.
Brushing past him, your heels click against the polished floors through the marble halls of the courthouse. As you glance to the tall, ornate windows lining the corridor, the sunlight streams through, casting intricate patterns.
“Hmm, think I guessed right,” he chuckles as he saunters after you.
“And what if you did?” you snap, voice echoing in the grand space. “Is it so weird for me to want a normal family for my daughter?”
The teasing glint in his eyes dim as his expression softens slightly. Once you reach the elevator, Satoru presses the button—the two of you wait in an awkward silence.
The moment the elevator door slides open, you both step inside, the quiet hum of the machinery enveloping you.
“No, it’s not weird. It’s just... different from what I’ve ever thought about,” he says while he presses the button to the lobby.
You huff, crossing your arms as you lean against the back of the elevator.
“What, Mr. Perfect never thought about settling down?”
Satoru's gaze drifts for a moment as he considers your question. The elevator begins its descent, the soft whirl filling the silence.
“Honestly? No, I never did. My father used to pressure me about it all the time. Wanted me to marry someone who could... 'enhance' our family’s status.” He was contemplative, and the echoes of old frustrations are clear in his voice.
You raise an eyebrow, surprised by his sudden openness.
The rumors about Satoru had always painted him as a carefree bachelor, uninterested in the constraints of marriage.
Some said he was too focused on his career, while others whispered that he enjoyed his freedom too much to settle down. There were even speculations that he had a hidden lover, or perhaps he was waiting for the perfect match to come along, someone who could stand by his side both in business and in life.
“…and you never found anyone who fit the bill?”
He chuckles, a hint of bitterness in his voice.
“Plenty of candidates. None that I wanted to spend my life with. Plus, all those ‘suitable matches’ were just women trying to get their hands on the Gojo fortune. Most people just see the money and power. They don't see the person behind it.”
The vulnerability in his eyes is fleeting, and you realize that his father’s expectations must have weighed heavily on him. The pressure to find someone was not about love or companionship—it was about maintaining an image, a legacy. In a way, you both have been victims to control your entire lives.
As the depth of his frustrations become more apparent, you feel a pang of sympathy. It’s enough to make you wonder about the real Satoru. The elevator continues its descent, and you find yourself lingering on his words.
“That sounds... difficult. So why did you go through with this then? With me?”
His gaze softens; his expression thoughtful as he watches the numbers descending the floor levels. He tilts his head slightly, meeting your gaze with an intensity that makes your heart skip a beat.
“Because you’re different. You didn’t come to me looking for wealth or status. You needed help, and I needed a solution. It’s honest, in a way. No hidden agendas, no false pretenses.”
A nervous flutter dances in your stomach, your fingers fidgeting with the folder of documents in your hands. The softness in his words catch you off guard, and you find it difficult to maintain eye contact.
A small, rueful smile tugs at the corner of his lips.
“In a world where everyone wants something from me, I find your straightforwardness refreshing.”
Your heart skips as a warm blush creeps up your cheeks.
“I never thought you’d see it that way. I just... I wanted to do what was best for Haru.”
“And that’s what makes you different,” he replies softly. “You’re doing this for her, not for yourself. That’s why I agreed to this. Because I believe you’re sincere.”
The elevator chimes softly as it reaches the ground floor and the doors slide open to reveal the bustling courthouse lobby.
The weight of the conversation settles between you, a rare moment of vulnerability that made you see Satoru in a new light—a glimpse into his inner world.
The moment you near the courthouse door, you and Satoru push it open in an attempt to exit, but are immediately greeted by a barrage of flashing cameras and shouted questions. Paparazzi swarm around you, seeming to have materialized out of nowhere—how did they even know where to find you both?
Satoru, ever the master of public appearances, wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you close. His touch is warm and firm, and you can feel the steady beat of his heart through his suit.
The sensation of his hand resting securely on your hip sends a tingle through your body, a fluttering in your stomach—you realize now that this is the first time he has touched you.
“Smile for the cameras, Mrs. Gojo,” he whispers into your ear, breath tickling your skin.
You blink, heat rising to your face as you’re momentarily caught off guard by the sudden display of affection. But you quickly compose yourself, remembering the role you have to play.
Leaning into him slightly, you offer a shy smile to the cameras. The flashes intensify and the questions grow louder.
“Mr. Gojo why are you in a courthouse?”
“Mr. Gojo, what is the status of Gojo Corporation?”
“Who is this woman Mr. Gojo?”
“What is your statement on your father’s passing?”
As the paparazzi continue to snap photos and shout questions, Satoru leans down and presses a quick, gentle kiss to your temple. His lips were soft, and the warmth of his breath burned your skin. The gesture, though small, sends a shiver down your spine.
It was all for show, you reminded yourself. Just part of the act.
Yet, the unexpected intimacy lingered, making it hard to ignore the way your heart raced at his touch.
Satoru’s kiss had worked perfectly, fueling the media frenzy. The paparazzi went wild at the tender action—camera flashes intensifying and voices growing louder. They call out more questions, desperate to capture every angle of the seemingly affectionate moment. You feel the eyes of the crowd boring into you.
“Let’s get out of here,” Satoru murmurs, voice low and soothing amidst the chaos.
He reaches out, hand warm and firm as he interlocks his fingers with yours, gently guiding you through the throng of reporters towards the waiting car. His other arm subtly shields you from the crowd.
As you finally break free from the mass of flashing cameras and shouting voices, you slide into the car, feeling a sense of relief wash over you as Satoru slides beside you immediately after.
Glancing back at the courthouse, the reality of your new life begins to sink in. Once the car pulls away, a breath escapes you—one you didn’t realize you had been holding in.
“That was... intense.”
Satoru chuckles, arm resting behind your shoulder. He tilts his head slightly, allowing a few tousles of white hair to fall into his eyes. Through the soft strands, his gaze meets yours, a mix of amusement and seriousness dancing in his striking blue eyes.
“Welcome to my world," he murmurs. "Better get used to it, sweetheart. This is just the beginning.”
ꨄ︎
The following day, a moving company arrived at your apartment as promised—they packed up your belongings with swift efficiency, leaving you feeling like a spectator in your own life.
Watching your life be boxed up and loaded into trucks was bittersweet—as your small apartment, with its familiar creaks and cracks, had been your safe haven.
Everything was arranged, down to the smallest detail. By mid-afternoon, you found yourself standing in the grand foyer of Satoru’s mansion once again, this time with all your worldly possessions.
Haru, wide-eyed and excited, clung to your side, her tiny fingers wrapped around your hand.
"Welcome to your new home," Satoru says with a grin.
It felt more like stepping into a palace than a home.
He reaches down and grabs one of your suitcases, lifting it effortlessly,
"Let me show you to our room."
You feel your face heat up instantly.
"Our room?" you stammer. "Why would we need to share a room when no one is here to watch this charade?"
Satoru's grin widens, clearly enjoying your discomfort.
"Relax, I'm just teasing you. You have your own room. I just wanted to see your reaction."
You shoot him a glare, feeling a mix of relief and annoyance.
“You're impossible," you mutter, trying to hide the blush creeping up your cheeks.
He chuckles, leading you up the grand staircase, and Haru follows closely, her eyes darting around in awe at the luxurious decor. The polished marble steps feel cool underneath you, and the ornate banisters gleam under the soft lighting.
"Come on, let me show you around." Satoru says as he leads the way down a long corridor.
The walls were adorned with intricate tapestries and framed artwork, each piece more exquisite than the last.
Eventually, Satoru stops in front of a set of double doors, turning to you with a small, satisfied smile.
"Here we are."
He pushes them open to reveal a spacious bedroom. The room beautifully furnished, with a large bed, elegant drapes, and a balcony overlooking the manicured gardens below.
"This is your room," he announces, setting your suitcase down gently.
"Wow," you breathe.
It feels a bit overwhelming the moment you step foot inside. Haru, on the other hand, darts past you, exploring every nook and cranny with a delighted giggle. It was easily twice the size of your old apartment.
"This is beautiful... and a lot."
Satoru leans against the doorframe, arms casually crossing over his chest.
The soft light from the chandelier above casts a gentle glow on his features, highlighting the sharp lines of his jaw and the curve of his lips. His white hair, tousled just enough to seem effortlessly stylish, frames his face perfectly.
"Only the best for my... business partner," he says, tone light yet carrying a hint of something deeper.
You offer a simple, "Thanks," but your voice is softer than you intended. Your eyes betray you, lingering on him for a moment longer than necessary.
Satoru's eyes hold yours with a softness that catches you off guard—a striking shade of blue that seems almost ethereal. In that moment, you couldn't help but notice the intensity and warmth in his gaze, it’s almost tender, making you feel like anything but just a ‘business partner’.
Was he always this beautiful?
You can’t help but wonder, feeling a warmth spread through you as the silence stretches on. The moment feels strangely intimate, a connection forming that neither of you expected.
Crap. What are you thinking?
Haru’s giggle breaks the spell as she jumps on your bed.
"Oh, and just so you know," he adds with a playful glint in his eye, "my room is right next door. We share the bathroom, so try not to hog all the hot water."
You blink, surprised. "We have to share a bathroom?"
Curiosity getting the better of you, you open the bathroom door and peer inside.
It was equally impressive, with a large tub and walk-in shower, all in pristine condition. The fixtures gleam, and the marble countertop adds a touch of luxury. There was another door leading directly to Satoru’s room, a constant reminder of his proximity.
"Yep. Just think of it as our first test of marital bliss. Can we survive sharing a bathroom?" Satoru's voice was suddenly closer.
You turn to find him standing right behind you, having moved from his previous spot at the doorframe. The idea of sharing such a personal space with him was a bit unnerving. An awkwardly intimate setup for such a detached relationship, but you didn't have much of a choice.
"…I suppose I'll manage.”
Satoru laughs softly.
"That's the spirit. And don't worry, Haru's room is right across from us. She's got the best room in the house actually," he adds, tilting his head to the side as a cue for you to follow him.
Haru trails excitedly behind as you walk through the luxurious hallway, her giggles echo off the walls. Opening the door, you peek inside and are struck by the sheer extravagance of it.
The room was a child’s dream—decorated in soft pastel colors, with a canopy bed draped in delicate lace, plush toys neatly arranged on shelves, and even a small play area complete with a dollhouse and a set of building blocks. The walls were adorned with whimsical murals of fairies and woodland creatures, creating a magical atmosphere that seemed straight out of a storybook.
Haru's delighted squeals bring a smile to your face, easing the last of your worries.
It was clear that Satoru had spared no expense in making her feel welcome. Each detail spoke of thoughtfulness and care, from the cozy reading nook to the vibrant rainbow-colored rug that added a playful touch to the room. How on earth did he pull all this off so quickly?
“Wow, look, Mama!” she exclaims, her eyes lighting up with joy, running inside to inspect her new haven.
A sense of relief washes over you as a tender smile forms upon your lips. At least Haru would be happy here. The sight of her so animated and cheerful makes the transition a bit easier to bear. Satoru stands beside you.
“I wanted her to feel at home," he says softly, eyes reflecting a rare sincerity.
“You've done more than that. She's ecstatic," you reply, watching Haru dive into a pile of stuffed animals with a gleeful laugh.
Satoru clears his throat and rubs the back of his neck, the gesture uncharacteristically awkward. He glances at the clock on the wall, as if searching for an excuse to end the moment.
"Well, I'll leave you to it," his tone is gentle and almost hesitant. "Let me know if you need anything. Dinner will be ready soon, see you down there?”
His usual confidence is somewhat muted—you wonder, is it you? Haru?
"Yeah,” you nod, “I’m going to put a few of my things away and then we’ll meet you downstairs."
“Right. Take your time. There's no rush."
You can’t help but replay the interaction in your mind as you unpack the essentials from your suitcase. The awkwardness between you and Satoru would pass, you hope. For now, it was enough to know that Haru is happy and safe.
Haru’s laughter echoes from her room, a sound that brings a smile to your face. She seemed to be adjusting much faster than expected, her innocent joy undiminished by the upheaval.
And to you, her laughter solidified it—marrying Satoru, this was the right call.
ꨄ︎
The past few days living with Satoru had been a whirlwind of adjustments—it wasn’t without its challenges. The mansion, with its sprawling rooms and luxurious decor, is more like a museum than a home.
The sheer size makes you feel small and out of place at times, and the constant presence of staff make it difficult to find a moment of privacy.
Satoru, however, had been surprisingly considerate. He’s a constant reminder of the delicate balance you need to maintain—attentive yet reserved, playful yet serious, a paradox that kept you on edge.
Your interactions with Satoru had settled into a routine of polite, if somewhat distant, cohabitation. There were moments of unexpected tenderness, like when he had found you struggling to open a jar in the kitchen and had stepped in to help with a playful grin.
Another time, you had been overwhelmed while trying to assemble a new toy for Haru, and Satoru had quietly taken a seat beside you, helping to figure out the instructions without a word.
Yet despite these moments, there was always an underlying tension, a reminder of the unusual circumstances that had brought you together.
As the days passed, the impending charity gala loomed larger in your mind—the first public event you would attend together as a married couple.
Satoru had taken the time to sit down with you and discuss how you would present yourselves, a task that seemed daunting but necessary.
You agreed on the basics: stay close, exchange subtle touches, and share occasional whispers to create an air of intimacy. The plan was straightforward, but the execution would be another matter entirely.
He emphasized the importance of appearing united, offering tips on how to handle the media and the probing questions that were sure to come. His confidence and ease in handling the media was something you were learning to lean on, though the pressure of maintaining the charade weighed heavily on you.
“What about Haru?” you asked, concern evident in your voice.
“We’ll leave her out of the spotlight,” Satoru replied gently. “I don’t want to overwhelm her. She takes no part in this agreement beyond being your daughter. She’ll stay here with the nanny during the event.”
Amidst all this, your phone had been buzzing constantly with missed calls from Naoya. You hadn't answered any of them—maybe you should just call off the court case?
You did just go through a life changing event, marriage, and that often interferes with the legal process anyways. The judge would need to take into consideration your new source of income for the child support payments.
Honestly, you don’t need Naoya’s support anymore.
You’ll take care of that after the gala though—right now you already have too much on your plate, spending hours with Satoru, fabricating shared experiences and finding common ground to make your relationship believable.
The task of memorizing details about his likes and dislikes, his habits, and his quirks was daunting, but you found yourself surprised at the small details you were beginning to remember about him—the way he took his coffee, his favorite late-night snack, the way his eyes crinkled just slightly when he found something genuinely funny, or how he would absentmindedly run a hand through his tousled white hair when deep in thought.
As the days slipped by in a blur of preparations and rehearsed smiles, you couldn’t shake the feeling that this carefully constructed façade was starting to take on a life of its own. Each shared glance and each moment of unexpected kindness blurred the lines between reality and pretense, leaving you wondering just how deep this charade would go.
ꨄ︎
Standing in front of your bathroom mirror, you adjust the luxurious dress Satoru had picked out for you. A deep, elegant blue fabric clings to your curves in all the right places, and the V-shaped open back that rests above your hips adds a touch of allure.
Loose cascading waves frame your face perfectly, and the professional makeup artist gave you a look that is both subtle and glamorous, enhancing your features in a way the felt natural yet striking.
You barely recognize yourself.
The transformation was astonishing, turning you from a frazzled single mother into a vision of sophistication and grace.
Was it too much? You feel out of sorts, like you’re wearing someone else's skin. The elegant image in the mirror is both thrilling and unnerving.
As you try to steady your racing heart, a knock on the bathroom door makes you jump slightly—Satoru’s door.
“Y/n you ready?” his voice calls out.
With a deep breath, you take one last look in the mirror. As you open the door, Satoru’s frame leans casually against the entryway.
The sleek black tuxedo he is adorned in highlights his broad shoulder and lean frame. His white hair is perfectly styled, contrasting sharply with the dark fabric.
He meets you with a stunned silence—eyes widening slightly as he takes you in. The cool blue of his irises seem more vibrant, gleaming with anticipation as they trace over your form.
You had never seen his eyes linger across your figure like this before—the intensity of his gaze makes your stomach flutter. Feeling a bit self-conscious, you fear what will come out of his mouth.
Does he think it’s too much?
“Wow,” he breathes, voice almost reverent. “You look... stunning.”
A blush creeps up your cheeks at his unexpected compliment, and you find yourself unable to meet his gaze.
"Thank you," you say softly, smoothing down the fabric of your dress.
Satoru steps closer, eyes locked on you. He reaches out and gently lifts your chin, his touch sending a shiver down your spine.
“Seriously, you look amazing. I knew the dress would look good on you, but this... you’re going to be the star of the gala,” a slow smile spreads across his lips. “Ready to knock them dead?”
You nod, trying to ignore the fluttering sensation in your stomach.
“As ready as I’ll ever be…hopefully I can live up to the part.”
“You will,” offering you his arm, he adds, “Just be yourself, and stay by my side, we’re in this together."
ꨄ︎
The ride to the gala is filled with a comfortable silence.
The city lights blur outside the window as the car smoothly navigates through the streets. You find yourself stealing glances at Satoru, admiring the way his profile looks in the dim light.
Strange.
The usually insufferable man seemed different tonight—steadfast, dependable, almost... comforting? Perhaps it’s the nerves.
His arm rests casually behind you, fingers occasionally brushing your shoulder, and you’re surprised yourself how it does not bother you—in fact, it’s actually quite soothing.
Once you arrive, the grand ballroom is a stunning sight. Chandeliers hang from the high ceiling, casting a soft, golden glow over the elegantly dressed crowd.
The room is filled with the city’s elite—a sea of luxurious gowns and tailored suits mingling and exchanging pleasantries. The sight of you and Satoru together was enough to turn heads, drawing curious and admiring glances.
But the sheer number of people, the pressure of playing your part, and the countless eyes watching your every move—it’s all a bit overwhelming. You really felt out of place here.
Sensing your unease, Satoru leans in close, breath warm against your ear.
“Remember, just follow my lead.”
Guiding you with ease, his hand rests lightly on the small of your back as you voyage through the attendees—the warm gentle touch is electric against your bare skin.
Your eyes skim through the herd of people and land on a waiter balancing a tray of champagne glasses. Perhaps a drink would ease your nerves? You don’t hesitate to grab a glass as you navigate the crowd.
Satoru, ever the socialite, seamlessly traverses the room, introducing you to important figures and engaging in small talk that you struggle to follow.
Discussions ranged from market trends and corporate mergers, to the latest charity galas and art exhibitions. Trying to keep up, you nod and smile at the appropriate moments.
It’s clear that Satoru is in his element—his charm, effortless. You find yourself admiring how easy he makes it all look.
As you cling to him, the pride in his eyes when he looks at you makes you feel like you belong, even if you are just playing a part in this elaborate charade.
The evening flowed smoothly enough, with your glass of champagne acting as a steady companion. The warmth of the alcohol helps you mingle with guests, exchange polite conversations, and stay close to Satoru, all as planned. But each interaction was a delicate dance—your smiles and nods masking the nerves simmering beneath the surface.
Honestly, your mind was elsewhere—there is an undercurrent of anxiety as you anticipate Satoru’s announcement on stage, where he would publicly acknowledge your marriage during his donation speech.
When the moment you had been dreading finally arrives, you settle into a chair near the front, heart pounding in your chest.
Satoru takes the stage with a natural grace, and as the spotlight illuminates his striking figure, his presence commands the attention of everyone in the room.
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen,” he begins, his voice resonating with a confident authority. “I want to thank you all for being here tonight. Your generosity and support make events like this possible.”
His words flow smoothly as he speaks eloquently about the cause and significance of the charity, each sentence perfectly crafted to engage and inspire—you marveled at his ability to enthrall people.
Pressing your champagne glass to your lips, you desperately hope the cool liquid can help to steady your nerves a bit more.
Then, the moment came.
“I will be donating ten million dollars to this charity,” Satoru announces, his voice carrying a conviction.
The amount causes a ripple of excitement and murmurs to spread through the crowd—you nearly choked on your champagne in shock.
Ten million?
You couldn’t even fathom having that much money, let alone donating it. The magnitude of Satoru’s status is staggering.
A smile tugs at Satoru’s lips—a genuine warmth mingling with the mischievous glint in his eyes. He pauses, letting the impact of his words settle, then lifts a finger to tap his chin contemplatively, as if he just remembered something.
“Or should I say, we will be donating—me and my lovely wife.”
Satoru gestures in your direction as a spotlight beams upon you. The crowd erupts into an enthusiastic applause, causing your heart to race the moment all eyes instantly turn to you.
There is a rush of heat that rises to your cheeks, mixing with the warmth of the alcohol. The weight of the crowd’s gaze makes your vision a bit blurry.
Beckoning you to join him on stage, Satoru extends his hand and offers a comforting smile. Though, the moment you stand, the room spins slightly—perhaps it’s from the champagne, or perhaps it’s the sheer pressure.
You can’t fuck this up.
With as much grace as you can muster, you make your way to the platform.
Satoru wraps an arm around your waist the moment you are at his side, pulling you close and steadying your trembling figure. He looks down into your eyes with a genuine look of endearment.
“Everyone, please welcome my beautiful wife, y/n,” he says softly in the microphone, his voice filled with a gentle pride.
The applause swells, and you manage a smile, trying to focus on Satoru while ignoring the spotlight’s heat and the intense gazes of attendees.
Leaning in, his lips brush against your ear as he whispers, “You’re doing great.”
Despite the orchestrated nature of your relationship, in this moment, his genuine reassurance means everything. His presence is a steady anchor in the sea of faces and flashing cameras, the only thing holding you together right now.
When the applause dies down, Satoru continues his speech, the warmth of his hand remaining on your waist as his thumb traces soft circles.
You can barely focus on his words, the dizzying reality of where you’re standing feels both exhilarating and terrifying.
The moment Satoru’s speech concludes, the soft hum of conversation mingling and the delicate notes of the live orchestra begin to fill the air yet again. Satoru leads you off the stage, his hand never leaving your side.
Almost immediately after you descend to the floor, Satoru is approached by a business associate, his demeanor shifting effortlessly into that of a seasoned negotiator as they exchange discussions of market trends, potential collaborations, and strategic ventures.
Your heart is still pounding—public speaking was never your strong suit. Despite not needing to speak, being on that stage stirred something within you.
You recall a particularly disastrous presentation in college where you accidentally knocked over the projector, sending your notes flying across the room. The laughter from the audience still haunts you, and since then, you’ve always dreaded being the center of attention.
With Satoru engrossed in conversation, you seize the opportunity to make your way to the bar—seeking a moment of reprieve. Another drink wouldn’t hurt, right?
The gleaming rows of crystal glasses and various bottles of wine and spirits catch your eye. You scan the selection, your gaze lingering on a particularly rich, deep red wine.
Deciding it’s exactly what you need to steady your nerves, you signal the bartender and opt for a glass of the robust vintage, savoring the thought of its smooth, calming flavor.
One glass turned into two—your nerves finally beginning to settle as the soothing effects of the alcohol take over your senses.
Realizing you’ve been away from Satoru for quite some time, you prepare to rejoin him—but just as you start to rise, a familiar, unwelcome voice interrupts your thoughts.
“Well, well, look who we have here,” Naoya sneers, leaning against the bar beside you, a glass of scotch swirling in his hand. “Didn’t expect to see you here, mingling with the high society.”
A chill runs down your spine and you heart drops. No amount of alcohol could have prepared you for this moment.
“Naoya,” you stiffen, clutching your wine glass tighter. “What are you doing here?”
He takes a swig of his scotch, emptying the glass and placing it down on the counter with a loud clink. Leaning closer into your space, his eyes narrow—a cold, cynical stare boring into you.
“I could ask you the same thing. This doesn’t seem like your usual scene. What’s your angle?”
Your breath quickens and you feel your pulse hammering in your chest. Adverting your gaze, your fingers brush against the rim of your wine glass.
“I’m sure you heard, I’m here with my husband, if you must know. Not that it’s any of your business.”
The sneer he meets you with makes the room suddenly feel smaller, as if his presence is suffocating you.
“Husband, huh?” his eyes rake over you with contempt suspicion, “Quite the leap from where you were a few weeks ago. Is this some kind of game to you?”
Summoning your courage, you straighten your back and meet his gaze head-on.
“Not a game, Naoya. It’s called moving on. You should try it sometime. My life is no longer any of your concern.”
Taking a step closer, he looms over you—his voice lowering to a menacing whisper.
“I don’t buy it. This whole charade… you think I don’t know what you’re trying to pull?”
For a moment, you are frozen in place, the fear and control Naoya exerts paralyzing you. Your mind races, the implications of his words sinking in.
What if he exposes you?
What if this carefully constructed facade comes crashing down?
Before you can respond, you feel an arm slip around your waist, pulling you with practiced ease out of Naoya’s bubble and right beside Satoru.
“There you are, darling. Everything alright?”
His voice is smooth and warm, and his gaze flicks between you and Naoya, narrowing as he surveys the situation. The look on your face unsettles him—something feels off.
Naoya straightens himself, leaning against the bar with a supercilious smirk as he crosses his arms.
“Just catching up with an old friend. No harm in that, right?”
“I don’t think we’ve been properly introduced.” Satoru’s tone was light but laced with an underlying steel, “I’m y/n’s husband, Satoru Gojo.”
A scoff escapes Naoya as his eyes flash with irritation, but an unnerving smile remains upon his lips.
“Yes, I’ve heard. You certainly move fast, don’t you, y/n?”
Naoya can see right through you—you fell a flash of panic. Turning to Satoru, your eyes meet his with a silent plea for support. His expression softens and he gives you a reassuring nod while tightening his grip upon your waist.
“Well, when you know, you know,” Satoru says with a charming smile, “and we knew.”
Naoya snickers, running his hand through his hair in disbelief.
“Come on y/n. How did someone like you end up with someone like him? Seems... unlikely. You don’t belong here.”
Heat rises to your face and the sudden urge to shrink away overwhelms you—your heart dropping at the sting of Naoya’s words.
Suddenly, Satoru steps closer, creating a protective barrier between you and Naoya—the playful glint in his eyes gone, replaced with a cold, steely determination.
“Watch your mouth, you don’t get to talk to my wife like that.”
“I’m just stating the obvious,” Naoya shrugs, meeting Satoru’s glare with an indifference as he shoves his hands in his pockets. “She’s out of her league here.”
Satoru’s jaw tightens, his voice low and dangerously calm.
“If you think she’s out of her league, then you clearly don’t know her at all. You’re out of line. Y/n belongs here more than anyone. So, unless you have something worthwhile to say, I suggest you move along.”
“Is that so?” Naoya raises an eyebrow. “You’ll have to forgive me if I’m a bit skeptical. After all, you’ve always been a bit of a lone wolf, Satoru Gojo.”
Panic seizes you as Naoya’s observation hangs in the air. The last thing you need is for him to start spreading rumors or causing trouble. You realize you have to do something, and fast. Your mind races, desperately searching for a way to convince Naoya of your authenticity.
Summoning all the courage you can muster, you step forward, threading your arms around Satoru’s neck as you rest your forehead against his own. Your words are addressed to Naoya, but your eyes remain on Satoru the entire time, drawing strength from his steady gaze and the warmth of his touch.
“Satoru and I... we chose each other for reasons that go beyond what you see. We may have our differences, but we’re stronger together, and we have a connection that you can’t comprehend.”
Satoru’s eyes soften, reflecting a silent understanding and a shared resolve—his breath mingling with yours.
Feeling Naoya’s probing gaze, you know he won’t be easily convinced, and so, acting on impulse, you pull Satoru closer and crash your lips against his.
For a moment, Satoru seemed caught off guard. His eyes widened in surprise before they fluttered closed, his hands moving to rest on your hips. The world around you seemed to fade away as the kiss lingered, heat pooling in your stomach.
It was supposed to be a quick peck, just enough to sell the act. But the moment your lips met his, something shifted.
Perhaps you were emboldened by the alcohol, perhaps it was the need to be convincing, perhaps it was the way Satoru stood up for you—without thinking, you deepen the kiss, parting your lips and slipping your tongue into his mouth, making things more intimate than you originally intended.
You can feel Satoru tense for a moment, his surprise evident. But then, with a soft hum against your mouth he melts into the kiss, a hand moving to cup your face as he returns the intimacy with unexpected fervor—his other hand encircling around your waist, pulling you closer against him.
Your fingers thread through Satoru’s hair and the world around you seems to fade away—the only thing that mattered now was the heat radiating off of Satoru’s body, the warmth of his lips against yours, and the lingering sweet taste of the gala’s chocolate cake mingling with the wine on your tongue.
It was a moment that felt both incredibly real and utterly surreal.
When you finally pull back, you are both breathless. As you catch a flicker of something unreadable in Satoru’s half lidded eyes, for a brief moment, you forget about Naoya completely, about the act, about everything except the electric connection between you both.
Satoru's thumb gently caresses your cheek, his gaze softening.
Pulling yourself back to reality, you peer over to Naoya—his smug expression had vanished, replaced by a look of genuine surprise and irritation.
“As you can see, we’re very happy together,” you say sweetly, rubbing your nose against Satoru’s.
"Didn't think you were the type to move on so quickly," Naoya sneers.
A wave of exhilaration and embarrassment course through you as Naoya retreats back into the crowd. The kiss had done its job, but it had also left you with a lingering sense of uncertainty. Satoru’s touch is still warm on your skin—you can still taste him on your lips.
"You okay?" he asks softly, his concern genuine.
The question pulls you out of your thoughts, but his gaze does the opposite—your face flushes and it feels like your heart is going to pound out of your chest.
"Yeah. I... I just needed to convince him.."
Satoru studies you momentarily—knowing there is more to the story with Naoya. But he also knows now isn’t the time to pry.
He chuckles softly, his hand lingering on your waist.
“Well, I think you succeeded. That was... unexpected. You really went for it there,” he murmurs.
For a moment, it felt like you were playing a role, but the feelings stirring inside you were anything but fake.
"I'm sorry," you swallow hard, face flushing with embarrassment. "I didn't mean to..."
“I didn’t mind,” he interjects, thumb brushing against your lower lip, sending a shiver down your spine. “Just so you know, you did great. Better than I expected,” his voice low and husky.
Fuck.
You blink—Naoya is gone, but here Satoru is, still holding you so intimately, so intently.
The way he looks at you, the warmth in his touch, the tone of his voice—it makes you question the lines between reality and pretense.
“Didn’t know you had it in you.” Satoru hums, his fingers brushing a strand of hair from your face. He leans in, his breath dancing on your lips, tantalizingly close. “But next time, let’s save the tongue for when we’re really alone, hm?”
What is he saying?
Your mind races, trying to decipher his words, his intentions. Was he still in character, or was there a hint of genuine desire in his eyes?
The electricity in the air was undeniable, and you find yourself lost in the intensity of his gaze—the crowd around you fading, their murmurs and whispers becoming a distant hum.
Satoru’s eyes held secrets you were desperate to uncover.
As you struggle to formulate your thoughts, Satoru’s hand gently cups your cheek, his thumb tracing a soft line along you jaw.
"Relax," he murmurs, "We're just putting on a show, remember?"
You nod, though your heart betrays you with its rapid pace.
“Right,” you whisper, forcing a smile. “Just a show.”
But deep down, you can’t shake the feeling that there was more to this act than either of you were willing to admit.
a/n. ahh i really enjoyed writing this chapter. okay, i was snickering at satoru's internal turmoil when he met haru for the first time. i couldn't resist with the digimon 🤭 my daughter is currently obsessed with pikachu so that's where that inspiration came from lol. also, this kiss was one of my favs to write 🥰 lemme know if you guys are interested in me making this a longer series. as always, thanks for reading 🫶🏻 → on to the next chapter ꨄ
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