#IM SO SCARED FO POST THIS. YOU DONT UNDERSTAND

[historixally-accurate]

ok fine. behold. my rarepair ship.🚢 nem and doog.

[messenger-of-stupidity]

hiii ummm as someone who hasn’t listened to any of vega’s stuff (and is a little scared to) i just wanted to ask what you like about him. ok thanks bye :3

Hi!!

ALSO OH MY GOD!!! I WILL GLADLY TELL YOU!

(also tagging @clover-46 so she can be like "oh yeah this all makes sense. im a vega simp now.)

Don't be scared to listen to his playlist if you don't mind the gaslighting and such. He's not mean to Warden, but is actually kind of sweet to them. But if you dont like second guessing if youre being manipulated or not, then yeah... don't listen to his playlist. He's very sneaky.

-- TO MY LIST NOW --

I typically just go for villain/anti-heroes. Red flags are, unfortunately, what I find attractive. (in fiction and reality :') ) NOT ALL THE TIME THOUGH I SWEAR I HAVE COMMON SENSE

His annunciation. The way he speaks just scratches a very nice part of my brain. And if someone has a nice voice, it tends to capture my heart. It's more than just vocal fry, deepness, ect. It's the way he speaks.

He's multifaceted. At first we think he's evil because we see him from Freelancer's perspective. But when Carpe Deus comes around, it shows him in a different reality. He didn't just do what he did to Ivan because he wanted some yummy snacks. There was a genuine reason behind it.

I love the way he interacts with people. It's kind of patronizing but so subtle that you notice it, but you dont notice the extent of it.

He's poetic. He has such an extensive vocabulary, and he doesn't swear often. There's something to say about someone who is able to absolutely verbally obliterate someone, all without really swearing.

He's a sadism demon. (iykyk)

Vega doesn't actually touch Warden all that much. (from my understanding he just touches them when they need help) And irl I literally hate it when people touch me. So having a character that canonically doesn't have a lot of clear show of touching the listener took me out of the way I simp over fictional character and made it more how I simp over irl people. There's two sides.

His pet name for Warden (besides warden). Being called "Darling" makes me all flustered. Sam's is a bit different because he leaves off the "g", which leads back to the annunciation. There are a few words that sound better when you leave off letters, but for me Darling isn't one of them. (That doesn't mean I don't enjoy Sam's "Darlin", but just not as much as I enjoy Vega's "Darling")

I mentioned this before in a separate post, but Imp!Vega is very soft with Pet (that pet name omg im melting). I'm of the opinion that every canon character has the same qualities as their Imp! counterparts, so Canon Vega has the same possibilities to be soft with Warden. Soft Vega hits different.

Vega has a demon listener. None of the other's have that, and Erik's Demons and Daemons system is so fascinating to me, that I jump on any chance to be a part of that. Also I love designing demons, so having a reason to make a demon OC that I can show off to people and they wont just be like "okay?" is very nice. It doesn't really have anything to do with Vega, but it's one of the reasons I like him.

His one liners. He thinks of them on the spot (yes ik its from a script, but from an immersion level) and that kind fo wit is hella attractive.

How sneaky he is. That takes a level of thought and intelligence to hide it. And I fall very easily if someone is smart. Especially if they don't say it outright, but these little things they do express it.

Going back to my attraction to red flags, the power imbalance between Warden and him. And I'm talking legitimately about magic power. He said he's much older than Warden and therefore is more powerful. Feeling small and insignificant in that kind of way lessens my anxiety so much.

He offers excuses. Not for his behavior (well he does that too, but that's not what I'm talking about.) but rather excuses to his love to safeguard them. He did that with Pet in case he lost against the imperium. He does it with Warden in case they get caught going with Vega. He doesn't want their lives to be messed up. it's a small way to show he cares, but grand displays overwhelm me.

He's very fun to write. I'll write for nearly every character if I love the world/fandom. But he's so complicated to write and fun. I get to put this psych degree I'm working towards (we'll see if I change my major this year or next year. Idek) into my writing and it's fun. It helps renew my passion for psychology since it's getting burned out for the past several months. (I've been into it since I was in middle school) I have so many pages in my docs and notebooks where it's just a full analysis on him. (Going back to he's an interesting character.

Also I'm just a total degenerate.

[ruffiorocks]

Supergirl’s Government, not as Xenophobic as people think?

Why do i keep seeing posts stating that the government, Col Haley and now Lena are Xenophobic and that is the end of that?

Lets look back and remember what has recently happened. The American President turned out to be an alien in disguise. That was a massive thing! Marsden deceived all of the USA and conned people into electing her as the President. Now correct me if im wrong but one does have to be a US citizen (born one) to run for office right? (im British) So, Marsden tricked everyone and broke the first rule of being the President. People were/are undoubtedly pissed about this.

Marsden signed the Alien Amnesty Act, granting aliens American Citizenship. If a human President had done that it would have been seen as humans making that decision, humans extending the hand of friendship and acceptance. But it wasn't, it was an Alien, granting all aliens American citizenship. Easily and not so far fetched it could be seen as the first wave of yet another alien invasion. In fact id question this more if there wasn't any suspicion!

National City (Earth) has seen Alien invasion via Kryptonians and Myriad, what about Reign? They have seen the Daxamites and they have seen countless rogue aliens causing mayhem and out to destroy on a weekly basis. Remember that Jonn was an alien in disguise who pretended to be someone the government knew so he could be in charge of the organisation whose job it is to bring down rogue aliens. All of these things combined are undoubtedly cause for suspicion! An alien in charge of the country and an alien in charge of the DEO

So is it any wonder that the Government/people are scared and want to crack down on aliens (like Supergirl) and know everything about them? Its not the best way to go about it, not all aliens are bad because of this, but fear is understandable and it makes people do drastic things.

We saw the Vice President, who is now acting President come to the DEO and demand to know who Supergirl is. Of course she refused and she was fired. Note, she was fired not arrested or hauled into a DEO cell.

Haley was brought in to see what was going on at the DEO, not surprising since the President, the most powerful woman in the world turned out to be alien and she was the one to pardon Jonn Jonzz fo his deceit, oh and reinstated him. Alex? She may be the Director but she has also happily been working with Jonn, Marsden and Supergirl and other aliens who they have now seen aren’t as trustworthy as people first thought. Its not surprising they brought someone else in, someone the government chose and trust to get a grip on things.

Now Haley told Kara to stand down and stop getting involved in alien/ DEO situations, not so wrong to be honest. She was told by her government to let them deal with their problems. Lets remember that Haley and the President were content to let Kara do her hero things, as long as it didnt cross into their business. But Kara refused and keeps getting involved. Now WE as the audience knew Kara isnt dodgy, and she’s doing this because she is a hero and she wants to help. But the Government dont know that, all they know is they have constantly been deceived and they want to be back in control.

Now Kara refuses to stop getting involved in things that she has been ordered to stay out of. Yes i know, she’s a hero and that the point, to US yes! But to the President and DEO she is a rogue alien who is refusing to take orders, and is sticking her nose where it isnt wanted. Due to all the recent above events, its no wonder tensions are high! The most powerful alien on the planet is a law onto herself. Lets remember that people have already seen Supergirl go crazy and try to achieve world domination. Under that dazzling smile, short skirt and blond locks is freaking dangerous alien with the attributes to kill them all! She’s even tried once!

Supergirl refuses to stop getting involved! Blatantly ignoring the American government! Well since they have seen that they can’t trust all aliens, and Supergirl could have been in the know that the President was an alien (we know this, but the Government may not) so she could have been complicit in whatever plans Marsden may have had, she has also worked closely with Jonn, another known deceiver, is it so hard a stretch that Supergirl may not be fully trust worthy? That having leverage on her is the safest option at this point? Would they have tried to learn her identity if she had listened and stood down? Maybe, but Supergirl didnt. She refuses to listen, something that Supergirl has always struggled with, she has always been a law unto herself to be honest, same as Kal El.

Haley gets orders to find out who Supergirl is,  she does and we see her surprised that  Supergirl is Kara Danvers. She tells her that from now on Kara will do as she says when she says it. Alex protests and says ‘She just saved your life!’ Yes she did, and that is great, im sure Haley was grateful. But that doesn't mean Haley’s orders are any different, and saving Haley’s life doesn't mean Kara is now once again free to do as she pleases. That’s not how things work. Also, Haley just found Alex has been telling some huge lies and she’s right, Alex is lucky she isn't in more trouble.

Back to Kara, Haley says her life as Kara Danvers is over, ‘a member of the press working out of a secret government organisation’ yeah, am i the only one who sees Haley’s point here? Kara as a member of the press has unlimited access to what goes on at the DEO, not a good combo. Also, as a journalist Kara has the means to put a spin on how aliens are perceived, since we know that most of Kara’s stories either involve Supergirl or other alien news. Kara as a journalist, no longer affiliated with the DEO could reek some havoc with the power of the press should she choose to expose them. We know she wouldn't, but Haley and the Government dont know that.

Also lets remember, who owned Cat Co? Cat Grant! Who was worked side by side with Marsden when she was President? Cat Grant! Who was Cat Grants assistant? Kara Danvers! Kara could have been in league with Marsden and Cat from the beginning. Remember cat launched Supergirl as well.  So who is to say that anything Cat Co does or prints isn't biased or trustworthy? Oh as a side note, who is in charge of Cat Co right now? Not who owns it, who is in charge of the day to day business and who is the editor? James Olsen! A known vigilante, who has had access to the DEO and is close friends with Supergirl. Honestly its no wonder the Government are paranoid. That is a lot of possible bias happening in the press!

Yeah Haley goes overboard, she basically threatens Kara’s family and friends leading to Alex to knock her out. But her point about conscripting Kara back to the DEO wasn’t all that wrong. As mentioned, the US government dont know who they can and can’t trust now, Supergirl is under suspicion. Better to have her conscripted on their side than out playing the rogue hero when she has been told to stand down and they dont know her endgame. Im not saying its right, but i do see their point.

Now for Lena, long story short since i already address this in another post, Lena developed the serum to give superpowers to humans to level the playing field with aliens. Given ALL of what i just talked about, can you not see her point? Lena is aware of Marden, she is aware of the Daxamite invasion, she is aware of the recent alien threats, because she was either there or directly involved. She has also seen, that without her help things would have gone south with the Daxamites and Reign. Lena mentioned her ideas to her friends and they instantly disagreed, clearly thinking they can sort issues out themselves, using Lena whenever she is needed, but only doing what they want her to do. So Haley approached Lena, Lena wasnt buzzing about the whole giving her research to help the DEO etc but remember while they were talking, on the TV another alien had ripped out three human hearts. I think this is the turning point for Lena, she isnt happy, but things are waaaay out of control and anarchy is descending. Helping the government that has asked doesn't make her xenophobic, she hasn't shown signs of that. Wanting to be able to be on the same playing field as aliens doesn't make you xenophobic, it means you want to survive and you want everyone else to as well.

Haley is a soldier, i think she is harsh as hell, but not Xenophobic or as bad as she is made out to be. She is trying to get a handle on an organisation that has been effectively corrupted and compromised. Soldiers take orders. Also i haven't seen Brainy being threatened? Did i miss that somewhere?

Same with the new President, anarchy is descending with the COL, rogue aliens, not knowing who they can and can’t trust. He’s taking harsh steps to regain control of the country. I haven't seen him ordering the rounding up or registering of all aliens, have you?

Do you know who is Xenophobic and wants all the aliens gone and is actively trying to kill them all? the COL! Do you know who is actively working against them? The DEO! Do you know who has actively and publicly spoken out against them? Lena Luthor!. So i dont see Xenophobia in Haley, the President (maybe he is, we have yet to really see this in his actions outside of Supergirl) or Lena Luthor.

If i missed anything please tell me!

[okyio-archive]

hey guys !! im so sorry for being absent for so long :+( !! it’s been a crazy couple of days and i really needed to recover after everything that has been happening. again i just want to say thank you for everyone who has been so patient with me. i’m going to clear these anon msgs + i’ll respond to all my private msgs&discord chats + check out what i’ve missed once i wake up tomorrow. i love you guys sm for showing love + support. i wish you a happy thursday :+)

sims related

Would u ever do an editing tutorial? like how u draw little doodles and stuff like that! If it's not too much fo a hassle. love you SO MUCH!! <3

hey nonny :+) please check the faq next time !! I’ve answered how i drew the little doodles there but for a full blown tutorial i’ve already mentioned that i’ll do one once i have more free time :+) !! thanks for the support love !!

What are your favorite brushes for edits?

i recently found one right over here :+) and i’ve been experimenting w/ em !! tbh i dont have a fav cause im always trying out new brushes out + seeing which ones i like !!! so im sorry if that doesn’t answer your question asjkdhf

hi!!! hope you're having a good day!! is it okay to use the sims from your sim dump in a story as long as you get credit? if not i totally understand!

thanks nonny for asking :+) !! yeah definitely !! you can do whatever you like w/ them !! i would love to see so feel free to @ me :’+) have fun and tysm for using my sims :’+)!!

personal questions

Can i be your friend?

ofc nonny :+) !! ill prob reply slow af but i promise you that i would love to make friends :+) so hmu whenever you feel comfortable !!

How do you deal with perfectionism? Or what ever that word is????

honestly, tk wrote a perfect post outlining what she does and it helped me out a lot as well !! so check her post out + hopefully it can help you a bit too :+) if you ever need someone to talk to, im here :’+)

would it be ok if I asked u for friendship advice?

ofc nonny :+) !!! just hmu off/on anon in my inbox or pm if you wish :+) im always willing to help as long as you’re a little patient w/ me since i reply quite late haha but im always here to listen + give my 2 cents :+)

I find it so hard to study, I get distracted so easily and sometimes it isn’t my phone :(

awh man nonny i know what you mean. i struggle w/ studying a lot and i’m a uni student haha. besides the typical tips you can find online, what i found is this app called forest (it’s on ios + android devices!!) to help me stay on task (whether it’s studying/chores). check out more information here. it’s been honestly helping me a lot + who doesn’t like plants??? 

I don't know who to tell this to and you seem really kind: I'm the pickiest eater I've ever met or heard of. It's just NO most food is disgusting it just makes me wanna barf. And everyone treats me like a 4-year-old child. Nothing cheers me up anymore. I think I have selective eating disorder and nobody understands :( People are being mean to me all the time because I don't like certain foods and maybe I AM just a 4-year-old child. I need help and comfort :( Because being a picky eater is hard.

awh nonny first thank you for telling me about that :’+) im really sorry if im replying this super late asldkjf. i honestly really appreciate that you opened up to me about it okay? i know this can be difficult since it’s smt so personal. i want to let you know right now that i’m always here for you + supporting you okay? i know it’s difficult when your surrounding group of people don’t understand / support. although i haven’t personally dealt with this, i would suggest finding a professional + see what their take on it? if it’s to the extent that certain food makes you barf, it’s def more than just “wow ur picky” yeuno? cause you physically can’t eat smt without barfing it all out. seek a professional when you’re more comfortable okay? you dont have to do it now but baby steps!! remember you’re not alone, im always here for you oaky nonny :+) every step of the way!! lmk + update me okay? i’m wishing you luck ily !!

my moms having her 4th child and like im really nervous abt it cause this is the first time im actually old enough to like remember it and take care of him and like im scared

!! nonny thank you for coming up to me + telling me about it - i honestly really appreciate it :’+) !! first of all: congrats !! i know things will definitely be different since there are responsibilities to deal w/ and added stress but remember !! to take it slow okay? it’s 100% okay to make mistakes. it’s 100% normal to feel overworked. there will prob be more little arguments here and there since everyone will be quite restless + more irritable but take it slowly + (literally) baby steps okay? if it gets too much for you, take a breather and come back to it. im sure your mom will understand if it gets too much for you. and besides - im here supporting and rooting for you too nonny :+) !! i honestly cant imagine taking care of another human being at this age either - heCk i can’t even take care of myself askdjhf but remember it’s a learning curve!! it’ll take awhile + there will be a lot of obstacles to huddle through but it’ll be rewarding okay? again, if u ever need someone to talk to, im always here :+) !! ily nonny!! stay strong

Hi! I'm really sorry to bother you rn, but I just really, REALLY miss my dog who passed away several years ago. She was like my sister... I related to her more than people & I could always rely on her for comfort. All I want to do is just hug her again, but I know I can't do that. I just can't move on. I love her so much. I'm sorry, but I need to tell this to someone, ANYONE, because it's really been keeping me down lately...(dog death anon cont.) I've been seeing a therapist since she's died, and I've been on several medicines which DO help, but only to a certain degree. I realize there's a certain part that I, myself, need to control (ie moving on). but like I said, it's hard. I haven't told anyone this, because I'm afraid of looking stupid for letting my dog's death get to me this much that it's required hospitalizations and such. I just want to see her again. (end)

!!!!! asdf you’re never a bother nonny !! dont ever thing that alright? i’m always here for you ready to listen no matter what (i’m just a super slow replier so i apologize for that askdhf). but first thank you for coming to me + telling me about your personal problems - i honestly appreciate sm. i’m honestly so sorry nonny... i can relate to some extent because i got my dog when i was in gr 7 and he was my only friend who i can go to to feel love + comfort up since i’ve been bullied since elementary school & never really had friends. i can’t imagine what you’re going through .. i’m honestly so sorry. don’t think that you’re stupid at all okay? i’m the last person on the earth to ever think you are. i’m glad you’re seeking a therapist right now !! however, i 100% understand if it’s difficult to move on - cause it is!! my grandpa past away 10 years ago and he was one of my best friends and he was really the only “father figure-like” role model i look up to. till this day my heart aches thinking about my grandfather and how much i miss him. similarly, i would definitely feel the exact same way w/ my dog if he passed away because i treasure him sm. so don’t be too hard on yourself about moving on. i know it’s easier said than done but different people vary on how long they mourn for. some can be 100% okay in a couple months while others takes years - and that’s 100% okay! why? because we’re human. there’s no need to rush in “moving on” - take it in your own pace. i know the pressure / stigma of others thinking you’re “weird/stupid” for being like this state further creates anxiety/stress in “forcing” yourself to rapidly wanting to move on. however, i urge to try your best to ignore what others might think + focus on yourself to the best of your abilities. perhaps distract yourself in finding a new hobby / doing smt that you love or smt new. it takes time to recover - no matter how long you take, no one’s rushing you oke :+)? ill be here every step of the way if u ever need me. it’s okay to have those days where you tried so hard but u end up at point A because after you go through that hurdle, you’ll be closer to your goal. take as long as you need - baby steps nonny :+) i’m here rooting for you oke? i love you so much. you’re a strong sweetheart and i know you can do it. 

[cheerisuu]

Im Back.

Boy, how time flies fast when you’re busy keeping things feel right. I mean, they’re supposed to be. I’m going to make this update as quick as i can and as precise as i can, bet i cant do both tho lmao.

It has been approximately 3 weeks since Rock Bottom (i guess it’s what you call it? Well, close.) and things has been quite, nice.

The month of July has really been a journey of what felt like forever. Today is the 12th of the month and i have come to the point where i realised that the mind is the only thing that keeps us from doing or achieveing something that we want. And this applies to a couple of situations:

I learned how to do a buck tuck.

This is one of the few things i achieved as i underwent through a “therapaeutic healing” after the incident. I surrounded myself with the few people that im friends with in our Pep Squad and fortunately my friend Dapitanon, P. also had a common friend which made our days more progressive. Just the act of cheering for each other to do one’s best really lifts everyone’s morale.

“It’s really all in the mind.”

We ARE physically capable of doing things but our mind seems to think that there’s an invisible obstacle that prevents us from pursuing what we want to achieve. I realise this as we were practicing for a back tuck, which i proudly achieved (with a spotter pa hehe). But that achievement was already some proof that if i can have control over my body, i can do all things if i just believe just enough to do it right. Heck, I think I’ll attach my tuck video somewhere on here.

1st of July.

We went to a dog cafe.

Idk what’s with me but i really like to do something special at least once a month with him and WITHOUT telling him. After all, I can’t just let myself be carried away with the emotions that lead me almost to the verge of thinking it was over, right? So despite our awkwardness and difference of treatment (slight), I still picked him up (with miraculously good timing too) with our Navara and was able to use it for the whole day before returning it back to my Granddad’s. Did i mention he got car sick? It was the cutest. (Am i weird for saying that? Doesn’t matter tho lmao) i thought of going to the dog cafe cause i was thinking, “Hey dogs can like help with your mental and emotional health right? So why the frick not.” Im surely going to post a little GIF here somewhere on how cute the doggos were. And when i tell you, dogs CAN bring the purest out of anyone. We literally were like talking to babies man and boy the dogs were HUUGE, only the pugs were like “hey hooman u can luv me unlyk diz oder bitchez” haha. But if ever things do go well for us in the future, we are DEFINITELY going to get a golden retriever man. It’s my dream!

Anyways, we also got to watch our first movie as “barkada pero gusto ang isat isa” or BPGAII, it was Toy Story 4. And bitch, dont get me started on how we were wondering if it was a child’s movie or not coz boi, we did NOT like the jump scares at ALL. But still, me being an emotional, soft potato, it still made me cry in the end. The meaning behind was great it was all about taking the risk, which was kind fitting? For him at least hekhek. Basically Woody chose to be with his hoe, Bo, for Buzz, his bro. But this aint no movie review so, *boop.

I gave him my skin care?

Ok tbh this was so random right. He realised my skin was glowing better (coz bitch, we aint lettin no sadness ruin this skin ya feel?) so he asked what was i using cos he was contemplating on his gorgeous face that he was getting ugly now. (The audacity, am i right?? Lol) so i CLEARLY (no pun intended) put into the effort of giving him some travel bottles and put in some samples of what moisturiser and micellar water i was using right, and i guess it worked out well? I also got to drive it TO him still. But the good side of this was i was able to be with my Granddad and spend some time together as his driver hihi.

LADY DRIVER.

So I’m getting good at this driving thing right, as driving from Malaybalay to Cagayan, Davao to Tagum and vice versa, Tagum to Maco and back. So i might as well be good at city driving and yall cant tell me otherwise lol,

(SIDENOTE:except for the fact i got stopped by the Yellow Ranger in Ecoland coz i was at the left lane at a traffic light and my mom told me to go straight WHICH WAS WRONG I GUESS THATS A THING RIGHT, so i was almost charged 1500 pesoses. But thank Heezuz i was with my mom and she was able to talk through the officer but sadly we had to name drop my Granddad since he was a known regional director at LTO before. Sorry Pops, i swear it’ll be the first and last time.)

Back to real time, i helped him with his errands and was really lucky with the timing coz my Dad went off for a trip and my mom was left with his car. So yup, got the chance to borrow it for half of the day and drove all the way to Maa to get a keyboard his friend is letting him use for the mean time, her name is Jen and she’s the sweetest. (No backstory will be dropped for privacy). Aight, so we drove back to their house at Magallanes but didn’t have enough time to say hi to his folks coz it was noon and they were on siyestas, right. I still regret why i didnt like fake-pee or something tho. HahahahahahahDONTJUDGE. We ate for some late lunch at SML and felt korek coz before we joke about “asa ta nag park?” And now we get to be in the situation haha. It’s funny coz just when i thought things were detoriating between us, the world just chooses to keep things tight and close and say something like “oh, u guys are having an emotional conflict and struggle about ur relationship? Here are things that only REAL couples do and i hope u enjoy em!!” Dumbass. Jokes aside, I drove him home and goodbyes are still awkward, but i was starting to understand the type of ‘low-key’ he means.

Usapang Gym.

Oh wow it’s already the fifth point. If you manage to read this far, congrats! You get nothing but to keep on reading this rollercoaster wreck lmao. I wasn’t expecting he would pay the whole month at our gym and expects me to come with him. And it came to me: i kept on thinking that i should ask for assurance but in reality, he really does mean what he said about just being “me”. Things were different but things also got better. It’s like losing some and gaining some right? Like a body excrcising, losing weight, gaining muscle, idk its a weak analogy but its close enough for yall to understand. It’s our first week today, (it’s Friday) i hope i could keep up tho haha. I guess I’ll keep progress updated? Idkidkidk. Also, i got to mention thats he is VAIN af. Idk if its a good thing or just a tragedy waiting to happen haha. I also became his coach, (oha san kapa haha), he told me he wanted help with increasing his verticle as he would help me with abdominals. So i bought sets of ankle weights only to find out the first one didnt suit him so i had to buy another set. AND IT WAS HALF THE PRICE I BOUGHT THE FIRST SET AND IT WAS BETTER. Prices will be disclosed. (250) So i like, i do my own workout right and he suddenly shows his hot-headed side of things coz he was upset he had to go home early coz there was this no-towel-no-workout policy at my gym so we had to cut our day short.

In times like these, my mind just goes to places to different situations. All the what-ifs start filling up my mind on how he could react to other situations that would cause a similar effect on what his character was showing right. But in the end, i still give kudos to myself coz im able to keep up and cope with how quick his personality changes sometimes. And sometimes, im the one with a crack on the head lmao. Well, most of the time.

TAKE AWAYS.

Fast forward to this very moment, its 11:30 in the evening and im recalling all of this on a positive note. Today was an addition to a great day we had as a rest day from gym. We watched Spiderman: Far From Home and i guess its now my current favorite and HAD to watch it twice.

Speaking of Twice, bruh i want to do a dance cover so bad of #Fancy or #YesOrYes coz i been itching and the choreo is sooo goood! Not to mention Twice was in Manila last 29th of June. *sighs in broke* but i cant say it was the best concert from them coz there were complications like Jungyeon had a sty and was wearing an eye patch the whole concert, Dahyun got sick after along with Mina who wont be attending the 2019 Twicelights Worldtour because she gets anxiety attacks and feels insecure about performing on stage suddenly. I mean i know you got no idea what im talking about but its just sad to think of the fact that even someone so adored by many people, someone who has great physical, social and emotional support, can still feel the lack of these mentally. And if you’re one of those people who feels anxious about anything? I hope you get well soon and i hope you find the true meaning of your purpose in this simulation, because you are not alone. x

In addition to almost wrapping this up, i also treated myself again something from Adidas (coz again, bitch, if no man gon treat me i gon treat myself! HAHA!) which i later on realise i now own 3 bags from there and thinking to get a fourth one....someone help me¿ i also have to mention i already treated myself about a week ago (🎶) by waxing my own axillae, grooming my own brows, a gorgeous lippie from Beauty Cottage called Elegant Impressionist shade #9 Byzantine for half its original price haha, nothing beats fishing me through a sale. Speaking of treat, my Dad gave me my first pair of Tigers man and i cant help but tell yall its the same pair that the He wanted and it totally pissed him off that i got the pair he wanted first so bad and now he doesn’t know what to do coz he’s afraid if we have the same pair we might wear it at the same time and it would be cringy and weird (now for normal people that would sound cute right, matching kicks and all. But no. Not in this lifetime.), since im just blabbering of how im spoiling myself might as well end it here folks.

Guess I’ll keep you updated on how stuff might go on from now since class is fast approaching. Tomorrow I guess I’ll be attending a send-off party for our friend she’s going to the U.S soon. Oh, did i mention the re-run for Endgame is out? 🤔

[lostandbrokenshell]

Darkest Before Dawn Part 7

Farcry 5 fanfic. Rated M for Mature language and sexual reference. No pairing or plans for smutt.

“Im not a part of Edens Gate John, I wont be.”

“What was it that you did before? You mentioned saving lives before this. This is a different way to save lives. We are trying to save as many as we can.” John asked.

“I was a critical intervention paramedic. I was the person that flew in the helicopter to get people to the nearest hospital as soon as possible. This, is not saving John, not what you’re doing. Up untill i moved here that was my life, saving lives.”

“Then, your talents are wasted on the resistance.” John responded “You haven’t even been here a few weeks or even a week, JoJo. And, your fighting against your family for what? For who? You know what your sin is? It comes to easy for you. You jumped right in the fight with even knowing what it was. Your ready for a fight, if not looking for it. Your sin is Wrath, you dont care who you knock down as long as you win.” He was starting to get angry now.

You sigh and go over to him. “Your not wrong really. But your also not right. This is my fight. I fight for those that cant, i fight to protect. I dont think you could understand that anymore than i can understand your fight.”

“Your friends would rather watch us burn and die, and your going to help them?” That stung you, up until now you haven’t thought about that end game.

“I dont want any of you to burn, or die. I also dont want several innocent people strung up to die.” You say looking him square in the eyes. “I moved here, to get together with my family. But i cant let a whole county burn so i can do that.”

“Come talk to Joseph, let him explain, walk with us through Edens Gate. Joanne.” John pleaded. There was probably going to be more added but there was an explosion near by, the house shook. John instantly looked angry “Your men?” He sneered.

You put you hands up. “If so not on my order, they where supposed to stay away from the house.”

“Lets go.” He said as he motioned fo you to leave in front of him, you move with some haste, he looked very angry. There was three peggies waiting out the door, they walked with you out side the house.

“Some lone resistance member, we caught him. Apparently we got his wife and kids the other day, transporting him already to the bunker. The other two by the airstrip left.”

John turned to you. “Those two where your men?” You nod he still looked angry, you got the feeling he didn’t like being interrupted, or not getting his way.

“John.” You say softly he glared at you. “You will always be my brother, Joseph Jacob you’re family. My family. I love you. Dont doubt that. I just dont think i can get behind this project.” You heard a couple of the peggies whisper sinner. His face softened slightly.

“If you where anyone else JoJo.” He said while shaking his head. “Put her the spare room. One person in with her, two at the door. Jacob fed the last guy that abandoned their post with Joanne to the judges. I wont be so kind. Im going to get Joseph.” He said before turning away all of the peggies stiffened.

“If you dont touch me, i will cooperate fully.” You say as one of them go to grab you.

“As long as she cooperates keep your hands off, if she resists.... Use the bliss bullets.” John yelled over his shoulder. The peggies looked way more annoyed and motioned for you to follow them.

The room was big and beautiful the attached bathroom was just as big and beautiful with a stand up shower and a bathtub that could fit three of you.

“I will be with you for every bathroom trip, watching you!” Your assigned and very annoyed peggie informed you.

“Then enjoy the show, im having a shower.” you say as you start stripping the peggie looked horrified and scared. He looked away going all kings of red. You could hear the peggies talking to each other while you showered. Mostly complaining about gaurd duty and how you where a dirty sinner unworthy of being a Seed. After you got dressed you spent more time exploring the room, and looking for an escape. But knowing that they could shoot you at a sign of resistance put a small damper on trying. “Do you know when John will be back with Joseph?” You ask after a while.

“The Father and John will get here, when they get here.”

“Your useless.” You mumbled as you fall onto the bed. It felt like falling into a cloud it was so soft and fluffy. Your mind wandered to when you got split up from your brothers, they didn’t care that Jocob set the farm on fire to protect you all. That if they had done their job right and not just moved you from one abusive home to another, that wouldn’t of happened. The final straw for Jacob was finding out they refused to give John and you food. Not until you finished the work you fell behind on the day before, and started on that days. You tried to stand your ground and got struck. So Jacob fixed it, he started the fires in the areas that you where behind on. Then he set fire to the house. They just saw problem kids and would rather not deal with it. So they sent you all in different directions and closed off any roads to each other. Your adopted parents tried to contact your brothers for you a few times when they first started fostering you. But after your adoption went through, you where getting into trouble so they moved away. What would of happened if you didn’t move though? Would your brothers of found you sooner? Would you be helping them? The bedroom door opened and you sit up, John and Joseph walked in.

“Joanne.” Joseph said with open arms. “I missed you.” He came over and hugged you and gave you a kiss on the forehead. “I missed you. We all missed you. I was happy you where mailing me back. Im happy you’re here now.” He said with a big smile.

“Father, shes a sinner.”

“Sinning is fucking great, and fucking is my favourite sin.” You say as you wink at at the peggie. Who looked angry and took a step forward but then looked at John and took two steps back.

“Joanne.” Joseph chided sternly. He put his hand on your shoulder “You are apart of this, you will walk with us through Edens gate. Ive seen it, God showed it to me. He showed me everything. That can happen, what will happen. The first seal was broken and the rest will follow.” He was looking into your eyes searching. “Help us, save these people.”

“I cant help murder, and torturing people, Joseph. I feel like a broken record having to repeat that.”

Joseph smiled and nodded. “You just need more time.” He said softly he squeezed your hands gently and got up. “I will visit you later Joanne, for now you can stay a guest with John.” He got up and walked out John stayed behind watching you.

“Did you enjoy your shower? Thats real marble throughout the bathroom.” He asked.

“It was amazing all the little shower heads everywhere. Although my peggie gaurd probably enjoyed watching me shower, more than I enjoyed the shower itself.”

“I only stayed in the washroom to make sure she didn’t leave, I swear John.” The peggie instantly stammered.

“Leave, change out with someone.” John said with out looking at him. “Tell them to wait outside for now.” The peggie moved with great speed. “Please dont lead my my men to sinning JoJo, it wont work out for them.” He seemed to have calmed down from earlier. “Its nice to have you home. You will have a minimum of three people escort at all time. They will shoot you with a bliss bullet if you try anything. This will be your room, you do not leave the property. I have things to take care of, i will be back later.” He gave you a nod before he turned and left, a peggie came in a moment later.

[reindeercarrots]

Bad day for Tien Tien haha

Weiii, it seems like u fell asleep.

Ah my mood suddenly go down so bad, i leave office early today, dont wanna work anymore,

.

Cause I had a bad day

I am taking one down

I sing a sad song just to turn it around

.

Dad sent me some pictures of my granddad, he is sick, my parents took him to a hospital in dalat, he is over 90. I dont really close to my family, i thought i just had met my grandma 2 or 3 times during 4 years, before she passed away, and a time not over 15 or 20 mintutes

Life is so hard and time is too short

Sometimes i'm confused about myself, keep distance so long with family is a right thing?

I saw my granddad so weak, my dad is older, but i'm still stuck with a mess, dunno how is my future haha, i hope i don't take too long fo repay for them what they did for me

I can feel you're really love your parents, the way you said about them, always full of love. We are not too young anymore, must to be rush to take care back for them soon. We have plenty of time, but they don't.

.

I feel so bad with my work, got stress and pressure, they want me to do another option, a new one, but still force me with a short time. I can't feel anything except work work and work, like a machine. Spend 12 13 hours in office, still work at home, and they always ask why i'm work so slow haha. Classic style waste more x2 or x3 times to do compare with a modern style

Well now i understand why my 3D design team 100% new workers now, no one can suffer with their pressure

.

I figured out my social insurance in my old company, that's shit, 5 months for 2 years 6 months i worked in there LOL

I feel like today such a bad shit to me

.

U got up early today, surprisedddd haha, thank you for listening my shit day haha i'm feel better, thank you so much

I was grumpy and angry, even don't wanna talk with anyone. I think my face was bad in the afternoon, everybody looked at me, and they scared haha i think it was so bad, i wish i had a mirror at that time, to look at my face, i dont know how was my face that time haha

I kept silence and didnt reply any message from my leader today, just left office and noone say anything. The first time i did it, i was like a bomb, time to explosive.

.

Mom sent me message, asked my why i didnt go back home for a long time, she is hiding me about my granddad, but dad sent wrong pictures for me, i saw her in hospital

.

Ah i dunno what am i saying here lol

Sorryyyyy and thank youuuu

Mom asked me about u and D hahaha i'm glad when everything is done now

I think he gave up already, also i gave up either, can't let you play with him anymore haha, i feel bad when he kept insulting u cause of me, sorryyyyy, i wouldnt notice his real personality sooner.

.

Kuro is being more annoying day by day, keeps destroying a lot of stuffs, last night i couldnt cause how many time i woke up cause of she jumped on my chest haha, i guess she is 3kg now, not a little kitten anymore.

Ah im waiting your writting to post it, but maybe i will post it now, haha

Sleepy sleepy

Yêu Sven

Cám ơn

Và

Yêu Sven to the moon and back

I still keep repeating it until i can get a sun moon tattoo, i hope so ahihi

❤