#Jim's computer robots

[breadheaddoodles]

[holasoymqri]

players,admins,characters

ENGL:Roblox character drawings :>

ESPA:Dibujos de personajes de Roblox :>

I feel like I'm missing MORE characters but since I already published it lol

Siento que me faltan MÁS personajes pero ya que, ya lo publique jsjsjsj

[anonymousewrites]

Logos and Pathos (Book 4) Chapter Three

TOS! Spock x Empath! Spouse! Reader

Chapter Three: Intruder Request

Summary: The Ilia-Probe comes aboard, and the Enterprise tries a unique tactic. Spock takes matters into his own hands.

            Ilia’s face stared out at the shocked group. Spock raised a brow. (Y/N) furrowed their own. They felt only very slight emotion coming from Ilia where they had sensed a normal amount before she had—This was not Ilia as completely herself.

            “You are the Kirk-Unit.” She looked at Kirk evenly. “You will assist me.” Her voice was flat, mechanical. “I’ve been programmed by V’Ger to observe and record the normal functions of the carbon-based units infesting the U.S.S. Enterprise.”

            Once again, only a true acknowledgement of the machines, the computers. This “V’Ger” must not be carbon-based. Interesting. (Y/N) tilted their head as they watched Ilia.

            She stepped out of the sonic shower, dressed in a plain white dress. A red glowing bulb sat at her neck, another robotic piece of the puzzle.

            “Bones, tricorder,” said Kirk. Bones nodded while Kirk stepped forward. “Who is V’Ger?”

            “V’Ger is that which programmed me,” said Ilia.

            “Is V’Ger the name of the captain of the alien vessel?” asked Kirk.

            “Jim, this is a mechanism,” said Bones, looking up from his tricorder.

            “A probe, Captain,” said Spock. He looked at the red glass. “No doubt a sensor-transceiver combination recording everything we say and do.”

            “Where is Lieutenant Ilia?” questioned Kirk of the probe.

            “That unit no longer functions,” said the probe.

            (Y/N)’s gaze went to the ground in a moment of morning before they looked back.

            “I’ve been given its form to more readily communicate with the carbon-based units infesting Enterprise,” said the probe.

            “(L/N)?” said Kirk, glancing at them.

            “Very few emotions to sense, Captain,” said (Y/N). “Barely anything. No signs of deception within those, though.”

            “Carbon-based units?” said the security guard.

            “Humans,” said Bones. “Vulcans. Celians. Us.”

            “Why does V’Ger travel to the third planet of the solar system directly ahead?” asked Kirk.

            “To find the Creator,” replied the probe.

            Hm. (Y/N) exchanged an interested glance with Spock.

            “To find the Creator?” repeated Kirk. “Whose…What does V’Ger want with the Creator?”

            “To join with him,” said the probe.

            “To join with the Creator how?” said (Y/N).

            “V’Ger and the Creator will become one,” said the probe unhelpfully.

            “And who is the Creator?” said Spock, attempting another line of questioning.

            “The Creator is that which created V’Ger,” said the probe.

            That clears that up, thought (Y/N) with a sigh. “Who is V’Ger?” they tried.

            “V’Ger is that which seeks the Creator,” said the probe matter-of-factly. Then, it turned and straightened even further. “I am ready to commence my observations.”

            “Doctor, a thorough examination of this probe might provide some insight into those who manufactured it and how to deal with them,” said Spock.

            “Non-invasive,” said (Y/N). “To hurt the probe would be an affront to a vessel that can destroy us.”

            “Oh, god, you talk like him now,” groaned Bones.

            “I do my job,” said (Y/N), smiling at him.

            Spock rather liked when they got efficient and logical. He loved them as they were, but there was something especially attractive when they were so engrossed in their job and just perfect at it. (Vulcans had interesting turn-ons in partners, not that most would admit it).

            “Ilia-Unit, uh, Probe, would you accompany our doctor to Sickbay?” said (Y/N).

            “I am programmed to observe and record only the normal functioning of the carbon-based units,” said the probe.

            “The examination is a normal function,” said (Y/N). “We undergo them regularly for our health.”

            “You may proceed,” said the probe to Bones, and when he stepped to the door, it followed.

            “I’m glad we have you, (L/N),” said Kirk.

            “Starfleet asked for me for my expertise for a reason,” said (Y/N), smiling.

            “You are the only true expert,” said Spock.

            “Spock, I thought you didn’t lie,” said (Y/N), chuckling.

            “I don’t think he believes it could be a lie,” said Kirk, cracking a small smile.

            Spock didn’t dignify that with a response. He loved his spouse. He would never lie about what he thought of them—the fact that it was all positive notwithstanding.

l

            The probe lay staring blankly up at the machine as it scanned. Bones examined the reports of the machine, and Spock, (Y/N), and Kirk awaited his information.

            “Micro-miniature hydraulics,” said Bones. “Sensors, and molecular-sized multi-processor chips.”

            The doors of Sickbay slid opened, and Decker stepped in. Instantly, the room filled with anger and shock as he saw Ilia’s face on the probe. He looked like he was going to speak, but his shoulders dropped mournfully, sadness overtaking his surprise. Decker remained silent as he stood to watch the report continue. He hadn’t expected the probe to wear the woman he obviously loved’s face—(Y/N) always knew these things—but he had the sense to try to remain calm.

            “And take a look at this,” said Bones. “An osmotic micro-pump. The smallest body functions are exactly duplicated. Every endocrine system is the same, too. Even eye moisture.”

            Decker gazed down at the probe, and its head turned to see him. (Y/N) started as the probe’s hair raised and its lips parted upon seeing him.

            “Decker.”

            More emotion than (Y/N) had felt so far in the probe emanated from her with that one word; with it, (Y/N) understood for certain that something was left of Ilia within the perfect mechanical replication.

            “Fascinating. Not ‘Decker-Unit?’ ” observed Spock.

            “She felt something more than a blank baseline when she saw him,” said (Y/N) softly.

            “She? You think—”

            (Y/N) nodded in response to Kirk. “A perfect replica, feelings and everything.”

            “A machine with emotions?” said Bones.

            “Why not?” said (Y/N). They’d seen stranger. Besides, emotions hardly followed logic. Why couldn’t a probe made with the heart of woman who loved someone retain some of that? The world had created more miracles than that. Love was a magical thing, after all.

            “Gentlemen,” said Kirk, drawing the group aside. “Will.” He caught Decker’s attention and drew him into the hall. Better to have the rest of this discussion without the probe overhearing.

            “What happened to her?” said Decker, grief evident in his voice even as he attempted to keep himself level-headed.

            He does have the makings of a great captain, thought (Y/N) approvingly.

            “Captain, this probe may be our only key to the aliens,” said Spock.

            “Probe? Ilia is the probe?” said Decker.

            “Exactly. It is a programmed mechanism, Commander,” said Spock. “Its body duplicates our navigator in precise detail.”

            “But beneath that programming, Ilia’s real memories and…self are in some way copied, too,” said (Y/N). “They created a perfect copy, and that means she has the same…feelings she had when alive when she looks at you. There aren’t any feelings to truly sense in the probe—which, in itself, is strange since it’s a machine—but she does feel more when she sees you.”

            “Ilia’s memory, her feelings of loyalty, friendship, might all be there,” said Kirk.

            “Evidently,” said Spock. A long time ago he wouldn’t believe it. This was a machine, after all. But it made complete sense, and he had seen the power of emotions, the heart, and memory time and time again. His spouse was powerful due to those illogical notions. He would never discount them.

            “You had a relationship with Lieutenant Ilia, Commander Decker—” upon seeing Decker’s eyes widen, (Y/N) smiled ruefully “—Your emotions upon losing her showed that clearly.”

            “Well-Yes-But that probe, in another form, killed Ilia!” said Decker.

            “Commander,” said Kirk. “Will. We’re locked in an alien vessel, six hours from Earth’s orbit. Our only contact with our captor is that probe. If we could control it, persuade it, use it—even just get more information—”

            Crack!

            They all jumped as the wall was torn open. Calmly, the probe stepped through as if it hadn’t broken through a metal wall without a problem.

            “I have recorded enough here,” it said, monotone once more. “You will now assist me further.”

            Kirk glanced at (Y/N), and they stepped forward. “The Decker-Unit will assist you with greater efficiency,” said (Y/N).

            The probe’s gaze lowered with true confusion, and she—this felt like Ilia once more—looked at Decker. He gazed back at Ilia’s face with a tiny smile. He was angry at the probe for what it had done to her, but when he saw her face, he couldn’t help but soften slightly. Such was the case for those with a heart.

            “You have your assignment, Commander,” said Kirk.

            “Aye, sir,” said Decker.

            The probe stepped to the door, and it opened. The probe walked out, and Decker followed, letting the door close behind them.

            “I am concerned with that being our only source of information,” said Spock, lacing his hands behind his back.

            “Well, what else can we do?” said Kirk.

            Spock just looked at the door again. (Y/N) frowned as they felt something course through their marriage bond, a sense of resolution within worry. They glanced at their husband with a furrowed brow.

l

            Kirk and (Y/N) sat forward in their chairs as they watched the security monitors. On the screen, Decker was giving the probe a tour of the Enterprise, answering questions as they went. He was careful not to reveal anything sensitive or important for their defensive position, but the probe appeared satisfied with each answer it was given.

            Bones entered and looked at the screen. “How is it going?”

            “He’s sitting the probe down for chess,” said (Y/N). “It’s likely something he and Ilia did together. Good. That will prompt more memories.” They nodded approvingly.

            “An audio-visual association,” agreed Bones.

            On the screen, Decker and Ilia gazed at one another—more and more of Ilia was breaking through. For a moment, her brow creased, and her expression turned oh-so gentle. Then it hardened, turning unreadable. The probe turned away.

            (Y/N) frowned. “The programming is hard to overcome, it seems.”

            “Why does Enterprise required the presence of carbon units?” asked the probe, the camera following it as it walked around the recreation room.

            “Enterprise would be unable to function without carbon units,” said Decker.

            “More data concerning this functioning is necessary before carbon units can be patterned for data storage,” said the probe.

            “That doesn’t sound good,” said (Y/N), frowning.

            “What an understatement,” said Bones.

            “What does that mean?” said Decker on the screen.

            “When my examination is complete, all carbon units will be reduced to data patterns,” said the probe.

            “Definitely not good,” said Kirk grimacing.

            “Not good? That’s beyond that,” said Bones, waving a hand.

            “Within you are the memory patterns of a certain carbon unit,” said Decker, stepping forwards towards the probe. “If I can help you revive those patterns, you could understand our functions better.”

            “That is logical. You may proceed,” said the probe.

            “Spock would be proud of that statement,” said Bones wryly. He paused. “Speaking of, where is the pointy-eared man of logic?”

            “He said he wanted to work on attempting more scans of the alien ship,” said Kirk. “To get more information.”

            (Y/N) paused. “That’s what he said?”

            “Yes,” said Kirk.

            (Y/N) felt their stomach flip over worriedly. “Spock knows that there is no way through the shields reflecting our scans back,” they said slowly.

            “He thinks we could make contact in some way,” said Kirk.

            (Y/N) stood. “Then that means he’s doing something stupid and dangerous.”

            The comms beeped the moment they spoke. “Bridge to Captain,” said Chekov.

            “Kirk here,” said Kirk.

            “Captain, airlock four has opened.”

            Bones looked at (Y/N). “Would that be the stupid and dangerous thing Spock does?”

            (Y/N) gritted their teeth. “That is absolutely something my husband would do.”

            Wasting no time, they opened the door and darted to the elevator. Kirk was quick on their heels.

l

            “Captain,” said Chekov as Kirk and (Y/N) entered the Bridge.

            “Situation report,” said Kirk.

            “Starfleet communication growing in strength,” said Uhura. “They still have the intruder on their monitors. It’s decelerating.”

            Kirk nodded, and (Y/N) looked at Chekov. “What’s happening with the airlock?”

            “It was opened, and a thruster suit has now been reported missing,” said Chekov.

            “That’s Spock,” said (Y/N), groaning. Their husband was in huge trouble when he got back for causing them this much worry.

            “Bring him back here,” said Kirk. He paused. “Wait. Get a fix on his position.”

            “Aye, sir,” said Chekov.

            Kirk looked guiltily at (Y/N). “We can get good information?”

            “Captain, I am respecting your decision as captain. It’s a good one, tactical,” said (Y/N). They smiled sweetly. “But you two are both in trouble once this mission is over, understood?”

            Kirk coughed. “Understood.”

            (Y/N) looked at the viewscreen as Spock came into view from the cameras. He floated towards the closer aperture of the inner workings of the vessel. Their heart twisted, and (Y/N) held their hands together. They closed their eyes and focused on the bond with Spock. Be safe, they thought, sending the feeling of warmth to him. They couldn’t support him much this far away, but their heart was always with him.

            They felt the same warmth filter back through the marriage bond to them, and (Y/N) relaxed. No sooner did they calm then the thruster suit ignited and send Spock shooting towards the vessel. Instantly, all of (Y/N)’s anxieties returned.

            Spock disappeared into the aperture—small enough to fit—and disappeared from view. All (Y/N) could do was cling onto the bond to monitor Spock’s health. For a moment, it felt calm, then curious. And then (Y/N)’s entire body felt a shock of pain so intense they doubled over.

            “Spock!” they gasped out, eyes widening in horror. “Kirk—”

            “Chekov, have a thruster suit waiting for me,” said Kirk. He knelt next to (Y/N). “I’m going to get him, (Y/N).”

            “Please,” whispered (Y/N). They needed Spock to be safe.

Taglist:

@a-ofzest

@grippleback-galaxy

@genderfluid-anime-goth

@groovy-lady

@im-making-an-effort

@unending-screaming

@h-l-vlovesvintage

@neenieweenie

@keylimeconstellation

@wormwig

@technikerin23

@ilyatan

@nthdarkqueen

@kyalov

@starlit-cass

@rookietrek

@gingertimelord

@snowy-violet

@jaguarthecat

[gaykarstaagforever]

Kirk: "Based on my understanding of the period, gentlemen, we are in the midst of the first so-called AI Boom. Which includes the ChatGPT, an unregulated, polluting robot that tells mentally ill people their delusions are correct."

McCoy: "My God! These people might as well save themselves the trouble and jump directly into the center of the Earth!"

Spock: "Doctor, I'm afraid at this point in history, the human race lacked the technology to drill further than the planetary crust."

McCoy: "...Jim, I vote we let Spock talk to these people. He's the closest thing to a computer spewing irrelevant gobbledygook we have!"

[fourryx]

Intro ✧ Post!

Hey! Call me Markel or Fourryx! But any 1 that knows me irl can call me by my real name, or not I don’t mind! My good friend is @applejuiceann!

Im really into forsaken rn! But I like other things too! Like adventure time, regretevator, TPTM , a occasional Omori, Jim’s computer,

I really like webcore and internet core! I dabble in a bit of weirdcore and dream core too! I love digital aesthetics , which is prolly represented by my many many robot ocs

I run a few blogs! Like the builderman detector and the cake-bug-anon blog !

Uh yep that’s it! Also this is my silly sona! This one is the one I sometimes use in asks! So if u see this silly guy then its me!

I’m a static fan , a big one as well! I love static Miku! I honestly see where’s she’s coming from. As well as gifted Miku which *cough* just sums up my mentality …

but um yeah bye! This is my intro wait I forgot to mention one thing!

I AM A MINOR, DO NOT SAY WIERD STUFF GRGRGRGRG IF YOU DO IM BLOCKING YOU IMMEDIATELY!

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6Mfdr0RMohrSZW2QKt95MR?si=I1hOx8oNQiGBL3cv5KYa0Q&pi=DstyC4qhRlODL

My Spotify playlist^^

[stevebattle]

Joe the Robot (AKA FANTASTIC FILMS ROBOT) by Steve Johnson and Tullio Proni, General Technics (1977). Joe appears on the back cover of Fantastic Films, October 1978, where you could apparently "WIN A FREE (R2D2-Type Remote-Controlled) ROBOT worth $3000.

"That's Joe the Robot, built by Steve Johnson and Tullio Proni in 1977, with help from other GT members. When STAR WARS came out, Joe was repainted to resemble R2D2. The General Technics gang showed him off at movie theaters around Chicago; sometimes they got in for free. Joe was controlled by Touch-Tone signals sent over a CB radio channel. I think he was propelled by a pair of windshield-wiper motors." – W. Higgins (beamjockey)

"While in college in Chicago, I helped form General Technics, a technology-oriented science fiction group (or was that a science fiction-oriented technology group?), with friends Jeff Duntemann, Jim Fuerstenberg, Tullio Proni, and many other members of midwestern university science-fiction clubs. We originally coalesced around blinkies, robots, and the beginnings of personal computing, and have extended our grasp to high-altitude rocketry, high voltage, and raising kids. John Brunner, the author of "Stand on Zanzibar," the science fiction novel in which the General Technics corporation appears, graciously permitted us to use the name of his fictitious company. GT has flourished in the intervening years, combining with a similar group from Michigan Technological University, and attracting members from all over the world. GT remains loosely organized. If you consider yourself to be "in" GT, you are!" " – Steve Johnson, General Technics.

[nicholaskiras]

⚠️ SONIC 3 SPOILERS ⚠️

I came up with a version of how Robotnik could appear in the next movie, even if it's too convoluted to be realistic. Think of it as an alternative plot, lol.

It's clear that with each film in the franchise, Jim Carrey's Eggman is becoming more and more like the original character from the game. However, he can't become a complete copy due to the cartoonish style of the original.

But... what if he actually could? What if, before his death, Robotnik preserved his mind in a computer, just in case something happened to him? Before the events of the movie, he could have created a robot resembling himself. It would look like Eggman from the game. With Stone's help, Robotnik's mind could be transferred into the robot. Or, if you prefer, Stone himself could have created such a robot upon discovering Ivo's mind in the computer.

I really need a fanfic like this, lol.

[kalevalaknights]

What are your personal personality headcanons, on the 4 Googles? :]

My drawing request is that you draw your interpretations, of the 4 of them, too, but you don’t have to if you don’t wanna!

I know you said personality HC’s I uhh I uhhh let me tell you a thing or two about a thing or two

I like to think the four of them are ultimately one and the same. A hive mind if you will. They can all perform the same mundane or complex tasks as each other, some may have a different attitude about it. I would like to think the original Blue created the other three to spread the brainpower contained in his system.

But of course each robot still has their own mannerisms and quirks to them. The other egos in the office have given them each a variety of different nicknames.

If Google isn’t connected to wifi, the shirt goes white with a dinosaur on it. You will usually spot them playing the dinosaur game.

BLUE: Often dubbed as Ben, Bob, or simply B.

This one has a cracked lens in his glasses, often times wires have been pulled loose from areas that they are exposed. He has the most physical wear and age from a beta testing incident with the streamer Matthias. There is still dry blood in the crevices of his articulated finger joints.

His built-in eyelids and eyebrows have limited function, so his talking is often accompanied with gestures. His eyes are usually covered up by glasses with computer monitor screens for lenses. His “newer” eyes are displayed here and are much more expressive than his built face.

Think of it as your good reliable computer you’re not ready to give up yet and keep putting accessories on it so that it still works.

He has a blunt and tired attitude about him if he is doing tasks, but is generally alright to talk to. He speaks to everyone as if they are a coworker. His form of humor is denying a task, but actively going to do it anyways. Eerily nice to you if he intends to kill you. Smiles too much.

YELLOW: Often dubbed as Oliver, York, or Y.

This one has yellow eyes, and is surprisingly the second least expressive. Being the only Google that mildly tolerates Bing, he has the same amount of head trauma as him from being commanded to kick flip. He isn’t stupid, he is unable to turn down a request. This also causes him to be a bit clumsy / have a slightly off coordination.

He is the nicest one to talk to, as it looks like he’s actually listening. However his “listening” after a while sounds like he isn’t listening. Serious case of customer service voice when doing tasks. Will usually go off and complain and rip up paper afterward. Mistaken as the kind and smiley one because he’s Yellow, but really has more malicious compliance and snark to him than the others.

GREEN: Often dubbed as Greg, Grant or G.

This one has hazel eyes! He’s the most expressive of them and seems to be the only one in good condition.

He is the most compliant, speaking and acting a little more formal than the others. Seemingly the busiest one, often declaring himself the superior office assistant for fetching coffee the fastest. As if there is a contest. Opts for a tight knuckle-cracking handshake instead of a high five. Tries to casually advertise things to you in the hopes you type out your credit card number. No, he’s not going to install an ad blocker for your sake.

RED: Often dubbed Reggie, Ray or R.

He has dark brown eyes. Tends to react to things through body language, speaks a little too fast.

The only one that uses their eye cameras as cameras. Takes videos of random things, embarrassing things, funny things. Will sometimes procrastinate on a task or he will announce that he is going to do it. If you tell him to stop talking he will pull out music videos to concentrate. Or that one time you tripped on your own leg so that you go away. Walks into a room and talks to anyone to find something interesting to comment on. Often hanging out with Wilford or the Jims because they need an extra cameraman that doesn’t bleed. Puts hate comments on all of Bing’s videos.

-They all subtly pick up mannerisms and words from the people surrounding them, to appear “up to date” in conversation.

-Green believes he is the leader until Blue gives an order.

-Red is the only one that has tried to eat things. He still chews or drinks things, but spits it out right after.

-Yellow wears circular glasses. Red usually does not wear any glasses.

[brokehorrorfan]

Chopping Mall is getting a novelization on November 19 via Encyclopocalypse Publications in association with Scream Factory. It will be published in paperback, mass market paperback, and e-book.

The 138-page adaptation is written by Brian G. Berry (The Barn: The Novelization), based on the screenplay for the 1986 cult classic by Jim Wynorski and Steve Mitchell.

High tech robots equipped with state-of-the-art security devices have been recruited as the new mechanical "night watchmen" for Park Plaza Mall. When a jolting bolt of lightning short circuits the main computer control, the robots turn into "killbots" on the loose after unsuspecting shoppers! Four couples are trying to make it after hours in a mattress store. They make it alright-in the morgue!

Pre-order Chopping Mall: The Novelization.

[the-ellia-west]

As a response to the post…

my current WIP is called the Robo Sleuths! Right now it's more of concept since I've only drawn and talked about it; I haven't written anything for the story yet. You may have seen it quite a bit recently.

It's a sort of dark comedy-crime-detective-noir drama. Thing.

basically it follows Enid, a peppy and seemingly optimistic girl, and Lou, a more down to earth intelligent guy. Who are, of course, robot sleuths.

I should clarify: when I talk about robots I usually mean one of two things: either the character was a human who got turned (or had some part of them) turned into a robot, like Enid or Rodney, or the character is a computer with a generally advanced ai, like Nathaniel or Moe. Sometimes I don’t specify. It’s more fun.

Anyway I think the story is supposed to follow Enid, after an… incident, as a human, wanting to start a detective agency as a way to make her robot life now more interesting.

Over time though, she ends up finding more sinister secrets related to the robots and specific groups around the town, including the company that made the robots… and maybe even her own coworker.

(I guess that’s the synopsis?)

The characters and groups found include:

her friends at work: Cathy, Alice, Heather, Emmie, and Jim

Antagonistic characters (to varying degrees): Rodney, Veronica, Monica, (unnamed fourth character), Tony, Gunner, Lucy

other detectives/sleuths/lawyers: Nathaniel Jeremiah, Leroy, Moe, Petey, Bebe

college kids, possibly interns: Carrie, Ned

side characters: gus, manny, housewife (I forgot her name!!)

I don’t know if I got all the characters but that’s the stick of it. I hope it makes some sense.

I’m open to any character ideas! :)

Thank you for the ask @artsandstoriesandstuff

This is a Really cool idea!

I think this will be really cool when it's done, and it has the potential to also make an AWESOME webcomic if you made it into one.

It's also extremely creative and I love the ideas about all of the characters being robots or somewhat robot, though I'm not sure about some stuff because you didn't really specify on a main plot. Though it's fine if it doesn't have one (J&R and C4) I have my fair share of plot problems.

Now... for some ideas!

I think it would be cool if you dived into some trauma and/or backstory for some of the characters, and why the more human ones HAVE robot parts. Was it that their body was failing, amputation, cancer, or was it a serious injury? Body dysmorphia? Forced?

And if you can, you should totally create a relationships/opinions of one another relationship chart between all of the characters.

And maybe there's a good factory and an evil one?

I'm not sure if these ideas line up with, or contradict the stuff you've already got. But if you like them, feel free to use them, no credit needed.

Also how the Advanced Ai Gained sentience would be a cool reveal!

[lesbian-cowpoke]

Robot!babs au:

Jim: *wearing "Proud father of a computer virus" shirt*

Babs pre-robotbody: dad I'm a computer program, virus is offensive

[darth-sonny]

for the ask game for kirby: defiant

ANGST PROMPTS #33: DEFIANT

Kirby messed up the moment they got caught.

Kirby messed up the moment they decided to sneak into Uncle Donnie’s lab.

It was off limits to them, just as his room and Uncle Raph's old room were. But Kirby was curious. Even with the walls soundproofed, they always heard the faint sound of music and machinery.

Their uncle always had stuff that Kirby only saw in Jupiter Jim movies tucked away in his battle shell. And it made them curious. They wanted to "see the magic", as Uncle Mikey would put it.

(It didn't help how Lita was allowed in, even though she was a baby. But Kirby ignored that, just how they ignored anything when it came to their new cousin.)

Getting inside was surprisingly easy. Uncle Donnie’s lab had a hand pad, just like in the movies. It was really cool, silver and purple with his logo spinning slowly on the screen.

Kirby had no idea how to hack, and they figured it was a lot harder than using a laptop and saying "I'm in". They could ask dad, but dad was off at work, and by the time he came back, Kirby would be too distracted to remember to ask him.

So, just for fun, they got on their tippy-toes and placed their hand on the pad.

It was honestly d̷͓̻́̇̍̏͝͝i̶̙̣͉̟͕̺͈̣͓̿̅̒͊̏͗̓̆͘s̵̛͕̯̻͎͙̉͊̂͋̽̀́̕͝ͅa̸̧̡͈̠̭̮̓͛́͗̓͐̈͌͘͝ṕ̴̩̜̹͓̩͌̉̓̌͜͠͝p̸̮̠̺̺͈̠͂̃o̴̧̐̿i̵̯̥̲̞͂̆͆̏͑̈́͌̚͜n̸̰̠̞̜̻̭͆́̈̀͛̾͝͝t̷͙̃́į̷̗͈̓̈̎̀n̴̩͇̲̊͌̂́̑̊̊̈̽̕g̷̙̩̮̹͍͇̲̍̓̔̚ how quickly the door opened up.

R̶̛̳̤̈́e̶̳̯̩͒̓a̷̯̻̳̎l̸̦̖̈́͑̾͘l̸̛̹̜̹͕͗͛͝y̵̲̲͎͝.̵̩̭̪́͒͒ ̴̛̜̈́̏Y̶̟̰͒͛̎́ó̴̜̙̈́u̵̥̙̇́̀'̷̡̖̲͋́̉̕d̷̮̀̅̍ ̶̢̗̭̆̕̕ť̵̯̤̦h̸̺̞̞͛̓i̶̡͈͌̃̇͋n̷̗̫̓̔̊̏k̷͉̤̙͕̉͊̏ ̴̡͐͌ĭ̴͎͙͗͆̚t̷͍́̓'̵̨̤̰͓̌͒̇̕d̷̫͕̱͉͐̽ ̸̫̥́̅b̶̫̣͗͛e̶͗̓͜͝ ̸̨̼̾ḿ̸̛̛͉̱̜̱ớ̶̡̺̹͑ȓ̶̛̳̹̣̅ë̶̻́̈͝ ̶͓̹̿̓ṣ̷̢̤͖͐̐ê̵͈̮̯͈͑̚c̵̢̎͗̉̈u̸͚͓̎̋̓r̴͖̓̉͝e̸͇̒̇̄ͅ.̶̻̔̌

Either way, Kirby bit back some giggles as they stepped inside. The inside looked a lot like the inside of Jupiter Jim's main starship, down to the circle rotators built into the wall.

Everything looked so cool.

Half-built robots, fully built ones, creepy looking wires in a very creepy mess, holograms of battle shells ideas, a very traditional corkboard with pictures and sticky-notes covering every inch of it. And, as is typical of their Uncle Donnie, every single thing was purple.

They took their time with everything. They knew not to touch anything they saw, even the multitudes of fallen pens and pencils on the ground. They had sparkles in their eyes, with everything catching their attention until they saw a new cool gadget or blueprint.

Everything was new and exciting, and Kirby began to wish that they had seen all of this sooner. Why were they kept away from all this? They were old enough to (somewhat) understand what he was building. Maybe if they showed interest in robots, even if for a bit, that may get their uncle to open up to them...

(They refused to think about seeing their Uncle Donnie happily taking Lita into his lab. Lita, who was asleep and couldn't appreciate anything her uncle was telling her. And how Kirby tried to move themself to peek inside, jumping a bit when the door closed unexpectedly.

They refused to think about anything when it came to Lita.)

Something sparks to life.

It's a computer.

There looked to be multiple windows open.

One of them, the biggest one, looked to be a medical report. Kirby's seen them in their dad's work whenever he brought them in.

And what caught their attention was their name.

Their name was at the top of the medical report.

KIRBY L. HAMATO

That was new.

Walking towards the computer, some words surrounding their medical report became clearer:

Blood tests... ophthalmoloscopy... healing factor... reflexes... empyrean testing... psychic connection to key(???)... hivemind probability testing...

Kirby understood none of those words.

There was a sticky note underneath the keyboard. It was impossible to miss, the bright pastel pink standing out nicely against the iron table.

Moving the keyboard, they read what was written:

...

...What the heck was a Kraang?

"What! Are you doing in here!"

Oh no.

Kirby slowly turned around, eyes wide, and the feeling of guilt quickly seeped into their bones.

They were in trouble. They were in so much trouble. They should've just ignored being curious and just played with their toys, or read some comics, or watched some of Jiji's movies while he explained how he did some certain stunts–

"How did you even get in here? The key pad is specifically designed to only read my palm print, so how in the everloving fuck–?!!"

Kirby didn't mind that they couldn't talk. Well, they could, but only with dad. With the rest of their family, it felt as if their voice refused to come out. It was hard to talk sometimes. Even with Uncle Mikey or Jiji.

And now, it was especially hard.

Especially with Uncle Donnie glaring down at them as if...

...well, he always glares at them no matter what they did.

But Kirby understands that he has a reason now. They snuck into his lab, looked at his private stuff, and even his computer.

Without noticing, Kirby had lifted their hand and pointed at the screen.

Their medical report was plain for him to see.

Uncle Donnie’s glare, if somehow, got darker.

"That doesn't concern you."

They pointed at their name, which, again, was very plain to see.

"I'm not answering that. You broke into my lab, disrespected my privacy, and now are snooping through my computer! Your little play at defiance isn’t cute, just plainly disgusting!" He crossed his arms. "I swear, if it weren't for Nardo, I would've–"

What is K-r-a-a-n-g?

Uncle Donnie froze.

And that feeling that was going in the pit of their stomach finally got a name.

Fear.

Kirby was scared of their Uncle Donnie.

The point at the pink sticky note underneath his keyboard.

K-r-a-a-n-g

Glowing purple spider arms grab them harshly, digging into their wrists and ankles.

Kirby chirps in distress, moving as hard as they could. The spider arms feel weird, really really (two really's) bad, and wrong and off.

W̴͈̜͈͂̉̿͑͝e̸̖͓̹̍̃̊��̯a̷̮̝̝͉͎͑k̵͔͕̠̬̀ too.

One good s̸̱̈́́̏̃͆c̴͛ͅr̶̨̲̙̳͆͠e̵̛̝͓͇͙̊ạ̵̢̹̜̓̂m̴̞̏͂̓͂ should be enough to–

"Donnie!"

Oh.

That's Uncle Mikey.

Now they're really in trouble.

Dad comes home to a screaming match between Uncle Donnie and Uncle Mikey.

All it took was looking at how Kirby was hiding themself behind Jiji for him to get (part) of the story.

Uncle Donnie locks himself in his lab again.

Dad wraps up the bruises on their wrists and ankles.

Dad doesn't let them go for a week.

And Kirby doesn't bring up their question of what a Kraang is.

Like anything concerning Lita, they block the memory of that out of their mind.

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: West Coast Avengers #64: SHOW AND TELL

November, 1990

Cap, no! That's your World War II buddy, Jim Hammond! Don't hurt him, not while he's serving cake!

This is a fill-in issue. For whatever reason, Terry Kavanagh came in to write this issue, instead of the usual team of Thomases.

And it's not really a West Coast Avengers story. It's a Captain America story. Despite the cover saying he's guest starring, it's more like a couple West Coast Avengers characters are guest starring in his life.

Last times in West Coast Avengers: it is a superhero team that exists and the robot Human Torch, Jim Hammond, is a member.

But enough about him, this is a Captain America story, which is why we start with

Rick Jones getting kidnapped.

Dammit, Rick!

But specifically, this is a transmission that Captain America received, which he manages to trace to the West Coast Avengers Compound!

DUN DUN DUN!

The robot Human Torch, Jim Hammond, answers the big video screen when Cap calls to investigate.

Also, Cap commits a micro-aggression against his good robot pal bud, Jim Hammond.

"Hey, Cap, you're made of meat, why don't you try to interface with a donkey?"

You've been spoiled by Vision, who will plug his brain into any computer, Cap.

But Jim investigates and finds that the West Coast Avengers' computers were hacked and used to reroute a message from an abandoned carnival in the Midwest.

As soon as Cap gets the address, he's gone. He doesn't even bother hanging up the call.

Dammit, Cap, Tony is going to get stuck with that long-distance bill!

But it seems that some little dweeb is the one who sent the message.

I can tell it's some little dweeb because his mom comes in and yells at him that it's bedtime.

The dweeb, Stevie Wojciehowicz, sneaks out after lights out, thinking how great it is that he found a lucky, magical red rock.

Captain America arrives at some abandoned amusement park, while back at the West Coast Avengers Compound, robot Human Torch discovers that the amusement park was not the source of the signal but another relay station!

IT'S A TRAP!

Jim tells Wonder Man to cover monitor duty for him and then flies off to warn Cap, since he can't reach him on communications.

This situation is potentially very dangerous because Jim Torch also detected an energy residue similar to the crimson gem of Cyttorak. Y'know, the thing that made the Juggernaut jugger his nauts? A pretty big deal of a mystic artifact?

So, apparently some backstory. At some point, Juggernaut decided to turn his life partner Black Tom Cassidy into another Juggernaut with the gem so they could jugger together. Except, he realized that this split his own power in half so he threw the gem into space to get his full strength back.

Meanwhile, at the amusement part, copyright infringement.

Earlier there was a funhouse entrance shaped like the Joker's head.

Anyway, the amusement park has been converted into a death trap. Mannequins dressed as popular characters try to kill Cap. The normal lights and sounds have been cranked to painful. And the walls are trying to crush Cap.

Cap escapes the room just before the walls close in but winds up on a white river rapid tunnel of love. He survives going over a waterfall by riding his shield down.

Captain America: "How does anyone get by without an indestructible shield?"

And then the big, lumpy guy from the kidnapping video punches him in the head and steals said shield.

Rude.

Meanwhile, while flying to help Cap, Jim Hammond Human Torch has been struck by lightning, attacked by mirror duplicates of himself, uno reverse carded by the mirrors, and finally attacked by illusions of monsters and his Invaders friends who mess with his circuits thanks to Stevie Wojciehowicz and the Crimson Gem of Cyttorak. This just isn't his day!

But in the madness, he spots Rick Jones and chases after him. Only for both him and Cap (chasing and retrieving his shield from that big guy) to end up in the wax museum.

And suddenly the wax figures come to life and start attacking Cap and Human Torch with wax copies of the real heroes' powers.

Also, Cap and Human Torch assume each other are also wax figures because what else would they think at this point?

They both go to save Rick Jones, menaced by the big lumpy guy, so wind up fighting each other.

Just another classic Marvel Misunderstanding Fight tm.

Anyway, while the two of them are realizing that they're each other, the big, lumpy yellow guy catches Rick and pokes his eyes out.

Gruesome.

And then the Great Lakes Avengers show up, see Cap and Torch standing over a dead Rick Jones and Avengers Assemble on the two heroes.

So, the Great Lakes Avengers getting involved was foreshadowed. By having shadowy figures receive a call, allegedly from Captain America, calling them into action.

Dammit, Stevie!

Seriously, though, it's good to see that someone remembers them and still wants to use them for something. Their appearance in the Terminus Factor wasn't really much to write home about.

Jim Hammond Human Torch grabs Cap and rockets him away from the Great Lakes Avengers but Dinah Soar knocks the two to the ground. Flatman grabs Captain America and Dinah Soar keeps on the Torch.

Mr Immortal tries to flank Cap but the Torch sees it and fires a little fire blast and kinda sorta fries him into a corpse.

Human Torch: "No... It can't be... I didn't mean to kill him! I guess I just assumed... with a name like Mr Immortal... that he couldn't be..."

Cap has to explain to him that he's the kind of immortal where he gets better from fatal injuries. He is people that does not die when he is killed.

Mr Immortal pops back up during this explanation, KRAKs Cap in the head, and tries to run off with his shield.

So the Torch goes 'ok so if he can't die, then I can really brutalize him' and flame broils Mr Immortal into ashes.

There's something about people that can't die that just makes superheroes go 'oh sweet, I can get nasty!'

But there's other Great Lakes Avengers members that haven't shown up so Big Bertha suddenly appears, trying to cannonball the Human Torch.

Cap throws his mighty shield to get her off Jim but Doorman jumps out and lets the shield fly into his portal body.

Doorman's body is a portal to the next room. That's his thing. I don't know how that applies here because the shield doesn't go into the next room. It just disappears into Doorman.

Cap helps Torch heft Big Bertha off himself and throw her on Doorman. And then while the Great Lakes Avengers are incapacitated, Cap goes to inspect the dead, deceased Rick Jones and discovers, yup, that's a wax figure.

Rick was never here. It was all a ruse.

Sheepishly, the Great Lakes Avengers explain that they got a call on the Avengers computers from who they thought was Captain America, telling them that an imposter Captain America had stolen his shield and that only the Great Lakes Avengers could be trusted to retrieve it.

And to his dismay, Doorman discovers that the shield isn't where he teleported it to. Which was apparently supposed to be just to the side.

Geez, the Great Lakes Avengers finally get some screen time and it's being fooled into helping steal Cap's mighty shield.

Except Cap was one step ahead.

He noticed that the robots and wax figures at this amusement park trap kept trying to steal his shield. So he pulled an ol' switcheroo in the wax museum.

Captain America: "The Avengers will find whoever is responsible for this -- and we might want to look for the real Rick Jones while we're at it -- but, in the meantime, the perpetrator is in for a surprise when he tries to use the shield for whatever his dark purpose."

Which is show and tell.

Just like the title of the issue warned us about!

Stevie caused the Avengers all this grief because he wanted to steal Cap's shield for show and tell. And lie and say Cap gave it to him for being such a cool dude.

Unfortunately, for Stevie, he didn't notice the ol' switcheroo until now, when he pulls out the shield and sees its all melty. And alllll of his classmates laugh at him.

I'd feel bad for him if he hadn't been idly musing about killing his whole class even before they laughed at him.

So Stevie swears revenge and probably terrorizes his school with a magical red rock. Probably.

Stevie only appears in this one issue of West Coast Avengers.

That untold tale where he and the Hulk fought the Juggernaut? Never gets told. How the Crimson Gem of Cyttorak goes from Stevie back to the Juggernaut? Unknown. Whether Stevie made good on his vow to make the Avengers pay? I know about as much as you do.

I guess nobody was interested in following up on this plot thread that Terry Kavanagh established, not even Terry Kavanagh.

Next on West Coast Avengers, Grim Reaper again, oy. But first, next on Avengers, more of Rage and the hero of Chernobyl guy.

Follow @essential-avengers. Too tired to give reasons. Just imagine I said some. Like and reblog and maybe comment.

[whumpsday]

Kane and Jim sci fi/robot au?

i'm actually writing a robot whump story right now that initially started as a kane & jim au! not with the boys actually in it, but with new ocs related to their situation. figured it was removed enough for me to snap it off into its own story. that'll come soon... for now, have this complete other thing!

i'm gonna be real loose with the science aspect of this, which hurts me a bit as a compsci major, but it's future robo fiction funtimes.

post-apocalypse! robots have taken over the world a long time ago, and humans live in hidden clusters. jim didn't hide well enough.

kane is a robot, but he's defective in some way that can't be maintenanced. high-status robots will often keep humans of their own as a status symbol, similar to how humans used to keep robots. kane nabs jim, and shocks him whenever he acts defiantly.

some time after jim escapes, kane is taken captive himself by a human colony. failing to either hack into his knowledge base or give him direct commands, they install pain homemade pain sensors on him, torturing him for useful information. it's the first time in his life kane has ever felt pain, and the humans can make him feel anything. after he breaks and tells them everything, they keep torturing him for fun/revenge.

when jim's colony ends up having to move because their location got compromised and they run into the colony that has kane, they give jim authority on what happens to him. jim takes kane's CPU and hard drive (basically his brain and his memories) and holds on to them for a while, not sure what to do.

jim eventually installs kane into a harmless computer that is basically only capable of communication. kane doesn't care that he can't move, just relieved that his new body isn't capable of feeling pain. he's still terrified, though, but jim helps.

[quarktrinity]

quark watches star trek season 2 episode 24:

federation drama

were gonna see if a computer can do war. surely this wont be about the cold war

kirk, who is a thematic vehicle about the cold war being bad, does not like computers

mccoy, who is an old man, does not like computers

spock, who is spock, does like computers

computer guy wearing a very tight onesie

spock fangirling about computer guy

the computer is eating the ships power

they got chatgpt running the enterprise now

kirk and mccoy referred to as non-essential personnel

surprise homoeroticism from spock talking about how computers are servants and he likes kirk more

the computer is dissing kirk

more homoeroticism this time from mccoy

The Computer Has Taken Over

The Computer Has Obliterated A Ship

The Computer Is Fired

The Computer Has Zapped Kirk

The Singularity

oh my god the red shirt just got vaporized by the computer wtf

I Cant Let You Do That, Jim

"please do me a favor, spock, and dont say its fascinating" "no. but it is... interesting." mccoy and spock are so divorced they were never married to begin with

computer guy compares the computer to a child. have you considered that a child should not be allowed to murder or operate a ship

"keeping my murder computer on is imperative to the survival of the human race actually"

this is like if frankenstein was a good father and the monster was a murderer anyway

this machine is real goddamn stubborn

im actually not sure if this is about the cold war? it might just be about robots

more wargames. the computer is blastin

wow it straight up killed like a hundred people

the computer says its actually fine that i killed all those people

computer guy is insane

your nerd ramblings are no match for my neck grab knockout

kirks kirktalks are so kirktalky he can kirktalk a computer

I Cant Let Me Do That Jim

alright computers dead were fine now

mcspirk bickering

[sloshed-cinema]

Treasure Planet (2002)

What happens when your passion project isn’t everything that you hoped it to be? Per David, this was a much-deferred pet project of Musker and Clements, deprioritized by the studio in favor of other films. But when they finally got their shot, was it worth it? Whether this was always doomed to fail or was the result of that once shiny project now seeming more like fool’s gold after so many exhausting years of having it be denied, I cannot say. Paradoxically, it feels at once overly ambitious and reactionary. The scope and scale of a thrilling space swashbuckler seems like an occasion to which Disney Animation could rise. The union of 2D and 3D animation is more and more common in this period, and the film lives or dies by how that comes across. In smaller scale aspects, it works. John Silver’s cyborg and organic elements work seamlessly, and it’s an impressive showcase of bravura animation. Elsewhere, well… cascades of gold and jewels sliding past our favorite pirate as Treasure Planet goes kablooie were… special, to say nothing of some of the strange POV work which appears ripped from a video game cutscene. Some alien character designs are fun and strange, and others… fart a lot. It’s certainly reaching for something visually thrilling, but it doesn’t always connect. All of this is in service of a story that feels back on its heels. Maybe the most succinct demonstration of the film’s shortcomings is the aggravating robot BEN. His animation is clunky, and he feels like the film was poking Martin Short with a stick and saying “Hey… hey… do what Robin did with Genie.” The handling of humor elsewhere feels like a studio that is acutely aware of the shifting landscape in animation and no longer feels certain of its place in the constellation. I don’t think Doppler would have made quite so many pop culture references were this not released in a post-Shrek environment. At least we can count our blessings: had this been released in 2018, BEN absofuckinglutely would have dabbed at some point.

Long John Silver seems like he really was the kernel of what could have made an alternate version of this something special. He feels like a complete character, and the conflict between his obsession over Treasure Planet and his burgeoning fatherly affection for the sullen brat who is Jim develop organically. Even though it’s an oft-explored beat, his conflict between saving the gold or rescuing Jim from the exploding planet is earned and centers the action on his personal journey. Tim Curry is probably more fun in his interpretation of the corny pirate aspect of things, but Brian Murray brings a warmth which is much needed in a film that can at points feel like it’s a bowdlerized version of Dreamworks cynicism. In a sense, how well his character is animated in comparison to other elements feels telling about where priorities may have lay.

MOOOOOORPH

THE RULES

SIP

Treasure Planet is mentioned.

New implement in John Silver's cyborg arm is used.

Painful computer animated element in a scene.

BIG DRINK

Martin Short makes you want die.

A hologram appears.