#POE AND ROSE HAVE HAD ONE CONVERSATION IN THE WHOLE OF THE MOVIES?

[stenka-razin]

I finally watched Star Wars 9 (aka Star Wars 8) and Star Wars 11 (aka Star Wars 9) along with a rewatch of Star Wars 7 (aka Star Wars 7). They're all bad!

The Force Awakens - I feel like this got by because people assumed it would resolve and pay off and you know, be a movie. It didn't and unfortunately the failures of 8 and 9 directly affect 7 because it leaned so heavy on future installments. It basically balled out on a credit card and episode 9 was the bill. But despite that I do think it's the closest to telling a coherent story in its own right. It's a story called Star Wars 1977 aka A New Hope, but whatever. It's also weird in that it like, double dips. It mocks this series adherence to the past while whole heartedly leaning into that earnestly. At it's best it's like Canonized Spaceballs, at it's worst it's reheated leftovers. But yeah, as soon as they drop that cryptic vision and "a story for another time" crap I know this was gonna blow. It's the guy who made fucking LOST. When will people learn!?

The Last Jedi - Guys this is dumb. Dumb as hell. Dumber than most Star Wars. Even the good ideas it flirts with are rudimentary. But they also botch half the story. Like the entire plot about the escape from whatever could have been solved with a single five minute conversation, and there's really no consequences. Like Holdo looks like an idiot for not briefing her crew... Poe Finn n' Rose look like idiots for botching a mutiny and getting thousands killed. It's so dumb.

Luke kills kids now... guess it's genetic. Like I think there's a small seed of a good idea in here. That Luke, once an anomaly amongst the Jedi, who saw good in a man everyone else thought was irredeemable, is now stodgy and conservative, a natural process that often comes when people are in power for a long time. That's a good idea. But for the first story with the character in years (I don't give a fuck about some stupid book) and we immediately jump to, "I tried to kill a kid cuz his rancid vibes" is bad! Bad writing!

Rise of the Skywalker - Everyone basically went in know this was gonna suck right? Like it had to wrap up a bunch of crap that no one had any plans for. Then it also had to deal with the fact that the Last Jedi kind of dismantled all that crap for a bunch of other crap know one had any ideas for. Like I know JJ and Kennedy are portrayed as villains for cutting down Johnson's vision, but I call bullshit on him having any ideas for a third movie either.

And in spite of that, it introduces a bunch of other stupid crap, too. Yeah this is Episode 2 levels of bad. I totally checked out. I had no idea what anyone was trying to do beyond shoot people. Babu Frik and D-0 were delightful though. Give those two a movie. Oh and it seems like each of these leans heavily on one old guy to breath life into the movie. Anthony Daniels, you may have been the best part of this?

Oh yeah the cast, like in general. They're mostly good, but also like. They don't properly hang out together until Rise of Skyguy and I just find it so odd that the filmmakers decide, oh yeah, they all hate each other? Like even Finn/Poe who were all like Buddy-this Buddy-that, now they're total dicks to each other. I also love that they one up Jedi butchering a love triangle, by introducing like six* potential couplings and all of them fizzling out. Like that's bad but it's even more confusing that they introduce more to fumble in the final installment.

Anyway, in summation. It sucked, and anything good about the first entry was a time bomb destined to suck because no one knew what the hell they wanted to do with any of this. Except make money. They knew that and did. Star Wars sucksssss

[lookninjas]

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

That's a lot of stars.

So I gave it a little bit of thought, and I think what I'm going to do is a breakdown of the edited version of Humdrum and Humble, since it's the most recent fic I've actually completed and posted that wasn't a very short one shot that can be boiled down to "I want to see everyone be nice to Rose Walker" or its natural converse "I want to see Roderick Burgess get kicked repeatedly in the dick." And as much as I'd like to get into something more recent, all I have that's recent is a couple of WIPs and any scenes I detail from those will almost certainly wind up missing from the deleted fic just because that's how it goes.

Also, I've already done a commentary on the original (mostly) unedited version of it, so it kind of feels nicely bookendish.

So let's dive in.

It starts in a theater lobby, while he’s paying for paper bags of rice and newspaper, playing cards and toast. He is out of his depth and trying to pretend he isn’t, in his old boots and a black button-down shirt, surrounded by sequins and pancake makeup and garishly bright wigs and fishnet stockings -- literally, everyone here seems to be in fishnets except for him and Poe. Even the silver-haired gentleman taking tickets has fishnet gloves on, and Ben feels like such a hick. And not, of course, that he feels like he belongs most places. That’s something that’s followed him his whole life. But this moment in particular, in this theater lobby, might be the worst so far. It certainly feels like it.

The first draft of this story was written during Rocky Horror season, specifically the week between our movie theater performance and our casino performance. At that point in the year, I'm understandably fucking breathing Rocky Horror. So that's a large part of where this scene comes from. I'd also referenced Toby playing Columbia once already, in Dead Souls, and sometimes when I was driving to or from work I'd mentally turn the idea of him and Poe interacting as part of a shadowcast around in my head for a few miles at a time. Rocky is kind of a liminal space where anything goes, and also the kind of place where Ben is going to feel decidedly off-kilter at first, even if he gets more comfortable as he goes along. So it just felt like a good place to start. Ben knew he was going to have a weird night. It just got weirder than he thought. But he also has Poe with him to guide him, and Poe has had experience in both these worlds -- Rocky Horror, and then also Torchwood, through that friendship with Toby that I dreamed up in my car driving through the middle of nowhere.

Sidenote: It's such a weird thing to try to write these situations where the main character has no idea what's going on, because you want to put some exposition in, but that's not how people have conversations. This scene was the worst for that, because of how minimal Ben's involvement is. As he gets more enmeshed in the plot, people take time to explain things to him. Right now, he just knows something weird went down at a synagogue once, and also sometimes people buy drugs from people with blowfish heads. But he's midwestern, you know, so he's just running with it. As you do.

And then some smaller notes: There's a bit about Aly getting hurt when he touches the person who took the drugs, which is notable because the skin on his left side is synthetic -- thicker and less sensitive than his real skin. It's also why his hand is cool in the second scene, at Pride. Poe saying "Stay safe out there," is a callback to Dead Souls, although I don't think the final draft used that saying as much as earlier versions did. Lastly, while I didn't edit much on this scene, I did add Jonah to it -- the silver-haired ticket taker in the fishnet gloves. Hilariously, Ben doesn't remember him being there, even though he'll later recognize the kid who took the drugs. Chalk it up to the kid being as conspicuous as possible, while Jonah's trying to blend in.

SECOND SCENE:

It’s Motor City Pride, which means it’s hot and it’s sticky and he’s got a ton of shit on his plate.

Fun fact: I have no idea what that conversation between Ben and Lando is supposed to be about, apart from people are trying to get Ben to do something and he really doesn't have time but is too polite to say no.

So this one is interesting, because it's our proper introduction to Jonah. In the last scene, we had Torchwood jumping in to a dangerous situation. This scene, we have Jonah in that position. His little conversation with Lando is one of my favorites, because it reveals so much about the two of them in a few lines:

Lando has worked with Torchwood enough that Jonah recognizes him on sight as someone who'd have their contact numbers.

Jonah knows Torchwood, but either doesn't have those numbers or is unwilling to call them.

Lando has encountered enough Time Agents to clock Jonah on sight.

The "Not Captain Jonah Hawthorne?" "Just Jonah" is our first clue that Jonah is trying to move on from his past.

And, of course, there's that echoing moment where Jonah puts his hand on Ben's shoulder, then Lando puts his hand on Ben's shoulder, and then Aly puts his hand on Ben's shoulder. Same basic playbook. Ben is more involved in this particular scene than he was the last, but he's still a civilian being treated as a civilian. He's helping with one person. They're handling the whole situation.

At the same time, his decision to help that one person winds up being crucial to how the story ends, which is the fun thing about it.

THIRD SCENE:

“-- scale of it,” Kai is saying, when Ben comes out of it. It’s dark, and there’s something cool and damp on his forehead. He feels okay with his eyes closed. He’s not sure how he’s going to feel when he finally makes his mind up to open them.

Ben, you're eavesdropping. Admit that you're eavesdropping.

Jonah mentions that John Hart had been in town -- this is a Torchwood Four story that I've toyed with for ages and never actually written out. Although one of my WIPs gets into it a little more. Whether John is cleaned up in canon is I think still fairly ambiguous, although I haven't really gotten much into the Big Finish audios. I do feel like Jonah, having known him from his worst days, would have his doubts. And Kai isn't that much more certain.

This also gets a little into what Jonah did with the Time Agency, at least for the latter part of his career -- he was the one to go after the rogue Time Agents when they went too rogue. Which is why, if a Time Agent were to be involved in this, things might get too personal too quickly.

One note: Poe's last full appearance in the fic here, and he has one of my favorite lines of the whole thing, even though it's sort of an odd choice -- “Toby always tells me it’s a very human response. I don’t even think he realizes how many times he’s told me that.” There's something unsettling to me about how the Torchwood Amnesia effect even affects Torchwood.

FOURTH SCENE:

Less than a month later, he finds himself sprinting down a crowded sidewalk, chasing a man who appears to have a bright red fish’s head where his human face should be.

This is the scene that made me want to write the fic -- Ben chasing an alien through the streets of Detroit. I just loved the image. I still love the image. No Torchwood, no Time Agent, just Ben being an incredibly brave moron.

I mean, he never does anything half-assed, so.

And judging by the blowfish's response, he's not even the first Detroit resident to pull something like this.

One of my favorite conversations in the whole fic is this one. I think it's easy to forget, reading through some of the other stories in the Children's Work universe, that Ben is tremendously unafraid of physical harm. He's been very traumatized, and he's very wary of certain emotional situations due to that trauma, but physically he'll absolutely throw himself into dangerous shit and not care at all. He's very secure here, even when he's alone and cornered and has a gun pointed at him. It doesn't bother him at all. He gets annoyed. He even challenges the blowfish at the end. “Just what kind of business is your boss involved in, exactly?”

And then Torchwood shows up to take over, and for the first time we get to see them dangerous, which is fun. I like how Kai basically unintentionally sums up the purpose of her Torchwood -- not arming against the future, or finding the Doctor, or weapons for the empire, but -- "You don’t kill kids in my town."

This is another part where the exposition gets interesting. First, we get the blowfish babbling about how Universe went down and there's no Torchwood in London anymore and there's a bitch in Wales (Hi Gwen!) Then Kai goes technobabble about vortex energy, and finally Toby steps in to explain things in English. Ben even gets a chance to ask some questions and receives a few answers, although they're brief and they lead to even more questions that he doesn't want answered.

And Mr. Universe/Ben Eugenides makes his return. I've kind of given up on doing a Torchwood Four story with this team that doesn't reference him -- I suppose as long as Aly's part of the team, that does go with the territory. Also, somewhere in writing this (and then continuing to work with the Jonah character), the idea of the death of Mr. Universe causing this hole in the extraterrestrial artifact black market became kind of an appealing hook for stories. If he was purchasing and selling (and releasing into the streets of Detroit) a lot of very dangerous alien artifacts, that creates a power vacuum that enterprising criminals would want to get into, as well as those who would be lured to the city by the promise of finding all of Mr. Universe's artifacts that Torchwood couldn't get to first.

Also, unstated in the story -- I have no doubt at all that Poe took Ben to Mr. Universe's shop at least once when they were kids, for incense or oils or tarot cards or something of that nature.

There's a brief nod to the fact that, since Dead Souls takes place in 2010, and Ben doesn't move to Detroit until 2016, Torchwood Four has outlived their standard expectancy by a little bit. (For the record, I imagine this story taking place around 2018.) But they're my characters, I love them, and they're not dying. Also, Aly doesn't count because he was born around 1916, but also went missing for about seventy years, and most likely spent that time in some kind of stasis. So he's not that much older than everyone else. He's pretty sure.

FIFTH SCENE

This time, there’s no room for forgetting.

Another good characterization moment for Ben right off the bat in this one: He keeps moving, and if the fear moves with him -- well. He’s used to that, isn’t he? Like an old familiar friend. I think part of what was interesting to me about this was this kind of moment for Ben, where he's in a very frightening situation and just kind of handles it. He keeps going, keeps living. Pays very close attention to what's around him and is aware of the ways in which he's in danger and is aware of the people trying to protect him and then also kind of... lets it go. And when the crisis can, he does what he can to call attention to the danger and then just walks right into it, knowing.

And trash-talks the woman who's threatening to kill him because he figures he's already pissed her off enough, so whatever.

Not like Jonah's better, calling his nemesis a cliche in the middle of their fight.

I had originally wanted Ben to take a more physically active role in the fight, but it didn't work out that way, and that's probably for the best. This is really more about the mental resilience of him and that particular fight -- having him throw punches would be a cop-out. He stays ready to get involved if he needs to, all the way up to holding a loaded gun at the ready in case he needs to shoot someone, but he's waiting until the need arises and trusting Jonah otherwise. There's even the very deliberate call-out to the fact that he could just eject the magazine, empty the last round out of the chamber, and throw the gun away, but he doesn't. He's fearless, but he's not dumb, and he'll do what he has to to save someone else.

That it doesn't come out that way is largely because of what he did to help the kid with the tie-dye in the second scene. He's not a good person -- he tazes Jonah for literally no reason -- but he bonded with Ben just enough in that hour at Pride that he changes the whole course of the story for it. It'd be sweet, if it weren't a fucked-up murder suicide pact in the end.

It's very interesting how much the kid does want to die. He takes the Sontaran Sunlight, he tazes Jonah, he claims to have set up a real bomb this time even though, at the end, it's another glitter bomb. He pretends he's disabled the panic buttons and then Torchwood shows up. He playacts the part of a villain, or attempts to, but in the end he makes a better victim.

And even with patchy exposition, Ben has still picked up enough info about Vortex Manipulators to realize that the Vortex Manipulator is the trigger to the bomb and that both the boy and the Time Agent have the ability to set it off. He might be an idiot when it comes to self-preservation, but he's sharp as a tack otherwise.

SIXTH SCENE

The butterfly bandages aren’t enough to patch Jonah’s face together where it’s split apart over his left eyebrow, and the glue is running low.

Ben finally in his element here. No chasing anything, no guns, no fighting. Just patching someone together so he can feed them.

This is the scene where I have to confront the O.C. in the room. What is the point of Jonah in specific? What is his arc, where is he going, and what does that say about Ben and his story? The entire time, Ben has been dipping his toe back into familiar uncomfortable waters. There is a crisis. The whole city, maybe even the whole world, could be in danger. Everything is lining up to make it look like it's his responsibility to stop the catastrophe. But in the end, it isn't a gunshot that makes the difference. It's the decision to sit with one person who really needed him, to take that time and take that care, that fixes things. That's where Jonah wants to be. He has been in the background of the story the entire time, wrestling with his decision to leave the Time Agency and just tidy up his corner of the universe for the time he has left. He just doesn't fully know how.

And Ben realizes that, and very directly offers to help him figure it out.

So we start with Ben fully out of his depth at Rocky Horror, and now he's back where he belongs at his own restaurant, doing what only he can with the experience that only he has. And it's that fearless side but also the compassionate side that has brought him where he is. And now Jonah's the one out of his depth and Ben will help him figure things out. Which is why it ends specifically with:

And it isn’t where the story ends, of course. But it isn’t a terrible place to start.

Which is also largely why I've been picking at various stories involving Jonah since then, because now I want to know how this works for him, because for all the similarities between himself and Ben, we're still talking about a sixty year-old Time Agent leaving the game as opposed to a teenager stealing a five year-old and moving to rural Northern Michigan, so there's going to be some changes.

One day. One day I'll finish a new fic.

I feel like I had more to say about some things; it's always different when you're thinking about it in the car than it is when you're actually sitting down to type shit out. But it's still fun to do this. I hadn't realized how tidy that arc was until just now, so that's fun. Sometimes I'm a better writer than I realize while I'm writing. I think that's true of most of us.

[kat8porgs]

spoilers scroll fast

This isn’t really much of anything, just me trying to get into a SW groove, I may expand this with other scenes and see what falls out of it.

“One thing I can be grateful for,” Poe said when Rose entered his cubby-hole, “is that the republic was not centralized.”

There are a dozen different flimsies in front of him and twice as many screens. The flimsies are print-outs, transcripts of a variety of communications. Some of them are requests and to-do lists, some of them are demands, some of them are just lists of available supplies. Some of them were delivered by hand, pilots from worlds where communication had been cut off by the First Order. Others had come in during the brief moment of celebration they had indulged in after the destruction of the Final Order (and Poe could not get over how pretentious that whole thing was, from the stories he has heard about the Empire overblown and pretentious were Palpatine’s ‘thing’). Some of the transcripts are from ‘I must speak to General Organa IMMEDIATELY’ communiques that came in while Poe grabbed an hour of sleep.

He was not sure who stood outside his room to keep people from bothering him but he will make sure to get them a fruit basket.

“It does make rebuilding easier,” Rose slid another pile of flimsies onto the over-crowded table and then slid herself into the chair across from him, “if communication harder.”

He looked at the stack of information and pressed his face into his hands. “Uggggggggggh. Please tell me those are lists of supplies. Bacta. Notes from a medical transport happy to take on new patients.” He looked between the shadow of his fingers and found, to his unsurprised, that Rose shook her head.

“These,” Rose motioned to the top third, “are from Senators who want to know the safest place to convene a new Senate, half of which are demanding we safeguard their passage and the other hand requesting we protect them while they meet.” She motioned to the middle third, “these are requests for aid, ranked in order of desperation, and these are…” she frowned at the bottom third, “well, either the translation matrix is on the fritz, they are in code, or the signals got garbled.”

He moved his fingers back together and took a deep breath.

Then he took another one.

“Okay.” He sighed and leaned back in his seat. “So. Uh, time to allocate a lot of this. Allocate? No, uh, divest. Delegate, that’s it.”

He pulled the top third away from the stack and moved it towards the stack he already had from the remnants of New Republic governments (what would they call this New New Republic? The Newer Republic? The Second Age of the New Republic? Not his job.) and pushed it towards her. “Can you ask…” he paused, “is Calrissian still around?”

“He and,” the engineer paused, “Janara?”

Poe nodded.

A slight smile flickered on Rose’s lips, “Janara, right, they were talking about helping her and her friends find their families.” Her eyes flickered up and down the pile of flimsies, as quickly done as her smile. “He might not want to take those on.”

“If he doesn’t, I’ll ask…” he paused, “Chewie next.”

This time the flickering smile was a grin, it stayed a little longer and when it died the world was darker for it.

“I think Chewie would be better to ask first.” She said and it was Poe’s turn to grin.

“Chewbacca it is, then. You know, I should probably give him a rank.”

The two of them stared at each other. Slowly, Rose’s forehead furrowed and her eyebrows drew together.

“…does he not… have a rank…?” Rose questioned, as slowly as the realization had dawned on the two of them. “But he was such a crucial part of the first rebellion.”

It was a question that he had no answers for, he shrugged instead. Half of the original Rebels had ended up as generals or admirals by the time the Empire was destroyed simply because they had survived it. The other half had been promoted to a rank they suited and then forgotten there.

“Maybe it’s a Wookie thing?” Poe took a shot in the dark. “I’ll ask him. Uh, when I ask him to take these.”

“And these?” Rose motioned to the other items that covered the desk.

“The calls for aid go to Lt. Connix,” he sorted those out, “supply lists go to…” he paused, “Commander D’Acy?”

He still was unsure if she had forgiven him for the whole ‘mutiny’ thing. Leia had but D’acy he was unsure of.

“I can take the supply lists.” Rose volunteered, “Commander D’acy should take calls for aid and Lt. Connix is the one best suited to make out whether those are code,” she nodded at the final stack of flimsies, “or space trash.”

She paused for breath, the nodded at him, “You will, however, have to make the final decision on things. Sir. Just not, maybe, the immediate decisions.”

He bit back the complaint that immediate decisions were the only kind he was good at. They meant no second guessing, no complaints, no glances traded between people who thought they could do better. Still, he nodded, began to hand the stack Rose had requested over and paused.

“…wait.” He glanced at the senatorial dispatches they were going to place in Chewbacca’s hands and then looked, very hard at Rose. Rose blinked at him, briefly unsure. “Rose. Do you have…”

Her gaze darted to the stack he meant for Chewie, to the flimsies in his hands, and then finally back to his face. Dawning understanding warred with dawning horror.

“..a rank?” He finished, paused, took a breath. “I mean ‘head of the engineering corps’ is sort of a rank-”

“Oh no.”

“But I really feel,” he continued, “that you could join-”

“Stop now.”

“Finn and I as-”

“This is painful.”

“Generals.”

She let out a gusty sigh. “Done now?”

He nodded.

“Seeing as I have never, ever held rank,” her fingers twitched, he was pretty sure it was an urge to grab a stun baton that no longer hung at her waist, “and the time for battlefield promotions are over,” she gave him a significant look, the kind that said ‘people are going to begin questioning your choices if you promote all of your friends’, “asking me to be a general is-”

“Commander.” He interrupted, rude he knew, “Commander of the Engineering Corps. Half of them have some rank or another, right? I mean, we scrounged up anyone with a service record after the Hosnian attack. And that was after the Resistance was formed from a handful of people from different forces who thought the First Order was up to no good.”

Mutinous words danced on the tip of Rose’s tongue, he could see them in her eyes.

Or maybe he was reading into things, both of them were tired after all and he did not know Rose as much as he would have liked.

“You’re a lot better at this,” he motioned at the desk, “than I am. Clearly. So, just let me make you a commander,” for now, he did not say, “so delegating to you doesn’t ruffle feathers, okay?”

If they had to send someone to the Senate, he’d definitely send Chewbacca. Rose was a close second. Lando Calrissian, though a childhood hero, would have to be third.

(Finn and Rey, much as he loved them, were really, really not politicians. And that was fine. That was fine.)

Mutinous words were swallowed back and he watched as Rose took a deep breath and let it out. “Commander is… fine. I suppose.” She took yet another calming breath and let it out. “That being said, you should probably delegate some of this,” she motioned at the desk as he had, “to Finn. Since he is your ‘co-general’.”

“Finn,” Poe nodded towards the corner of his desk, “gets to help me sift through the prisoner of war stuff. We’ve suddenly got… a lot of those on our hands.”

“I don’t envy him,” Rose nodded at him, “General.”

He did not bother to mention that in a proper military she would have waited to be dismissed. The Resistance had never managed to be proper. “Commander, you’re dismissed, go… do things.”

She did not laugh when she slipped out his door but it was a near thing.

[dax-enfinity]

I'd love it if you just rambled about your godkill au. I love this au a lot. Just. Infodump.

Okay infodump time!

GodKill Toby first!

- The first time Connie ever started to suspect about her son would be when he first started coming home with multiple bruises

- Because in canon HOO / PJO lore the children of Ares have a natural aura that causes: anger, rage, fury, and pain like the angry kind.

- So thanks to that the Ares cabin often get into fights and have many rivalries, so Toby would naturally get into fights too

- Oh, and Toby would also have additional disorders such as:

- PTSD (Car crash and abusive dad)

- Dyslexia (Being a Demigod)

- ADHD (Also being a Demigod)

- C.I.P.A (Numbness to pain/injuries)

- Tourette’s Syndrome (His entire backstory)

- When Toby turned 11 his mother finally told him the truth and Connie got divorced (yay! :D)

- He got his personal weapon the Celestial Bronze Axe because he wanted to defend himself

- He sees Chiron like a dad to him (aww, but also daddy issues)

- He likes to play lots of pranks especially back in Camp Half-Blood but rarely does in the Mansion (since the whole edgy atmosphere thing)

- Unlike canon Toby, GodKill Toby doesn’t have the mouth scar

- Toby would be the one to wear simple yet fashionable clothes such as flannels, band t-shirts, ripped jeans, hoodies, and overalls with accessories such as necklaces, bracelets, sunglasses, beanies, and converse.

- He has a skateboard that’s all I have to say

- GodKill Toby is pretty much a normal teenager except for the Demigod abilities and reflexes

Now.. Onto GodKill Nico

- As I said in my other posts he’s an edgy serial killer

- His early life consisted of being happy until his parents and Bianca died

- Very sarcastic

- Emo

- Yet also like Metal

- He was put into the foster care system at a young age but there were many failed fostering attempts

- Each of the families stopped fostering him for different reasons such as:

- Killing small animals

- Trying to make mustard gas once

- Got suspended multiple times due to taunting bullies at school

- Stealing

- He managed to shoplift 3 times

- Scaring the neighbors

- Due to his multiple disorders and trauma

- He decided to kill his last foster family and run away which he did rather quickly since he had been planning their murder for a week and had already packed his bags

- He cleaned up the evidence for no trace of his DNA

- Nico got found by Slenderman at the age of 14, so he has been a proxy for about a year until he meets Toby

- Kills with one of those sharp hunting knifes

- Instead of aviator and bomber jackets GodKill Nico wears leather jackets and sweaters

- Nico listens to:

- My Chemical Romance

- Motörhead

- Black Sabbath

- Mötley Crüe

- He would be a bit more fashionable than Toby for example he would wear leather jackets, sweaters, chains, black military boots, fingerless gloves.

- His room in the Mansion is unexpectedly tidy since it’s filled with band posters, a bed with black bedsheets and red blankets, a large desk filled with a few plants a computer and markers/colors/pencils.

- His room in the Mansion also has a small bedside table with a framed picture of him and Bianca

(ha, angst)

- Along with a large bookshelf filled with mythology books, a few non-fiction books on pirates, and some poems by Edgar Allan Poe

- Spare knife in the bedside table

- Kind of an asshole at first meeting

- Swears a lot

- Has a weird thing for blood, like he likes to look at it

- average horror movie fan

- “Honey, I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time”

- edgy quote he probably says all the time

- “Whoops, My fingers slipped”

- Yes I took that from that one Nico fan art Viria made back in like 2013-2014 on tumblr

- also rolls his eyes often

whoah…

This is long…

[boldlyvoid]

Amoreena | Chapter Nine

chapter nine

main summary: Heaven is a real place and it's located exactly 14.6 miles away from the FBI, Quantico Headquarters. Off behind a small park, under a fantastical willow tree surrounded by wildflowers, in every colour young minds can imagine.

Don't forget, heaven also comes with angels.

Chapter Warnings: date night!! this is very fluffy, very emotional and extremely horny. edgar allan poe is rolling in his grave at what they did in his enchanted garden

exhibitionism, public sex (no ones there tho), drug mentions at the end (let me know if I should tag anything else!!!!)

word count: 5.4k

from the beginning <3

He spent all of Thursday afternoon with Penelope in Richmond, setting up for his date that night.

Stringing lights on the trees, mowing the grass and trimming the flowers back, the staff ensuring that the museum was in pristine condition for them tonight, it was perfect. The cats were brushed, there were rose petals the fountain and the most beautiful picnic set up in the garden.

Penelope packed their dinner for them, keeping it in the museum fridge for when they finally arrived, it was the only thing Spencer needed to remember.

Y/N: just got home, about to get ready! Can’t wait to see you at 6 ♥︎

Spencer smiled at his phone, about to text her back when Penelope laid a hand on his back, “change into your suit and head back to her, traffic might be bad?”

“Thank you, for everything. You’ve always been my best friend, more of big sister actually,” Spencer pressed his lips together tightly as to not get emotional. “You’re wonderful Penelope, thank you.”

“Awe!” She swooned, wrapping him up in a big hug. “I will always love you, Spencer, you deserve all of this and so, so much more, now go before I cry.”

He laughed, pulling back, hand lingering on her shoulder as he walked into the museum. They let him change in the backroom, it felt incredibly strange to be putting on a suit inside Edgar Allan Poe's house to go pick up his wife. Not too long ago he dreamed about bringing a girlfriend here someday, life was moving too quickly, he needed a breather.

He kept his suit jacket folded and on the passenger seat as he drove home, where he lived with his family. Even just thinking that as he paid attention to the road made him smile. The wind hitting his face, his hair blowing in the breeze, he felt free at last.

He was where he was supposed to be, all roads lead to here.

Travelling up her driveway with a smile on his face as the dust followed him to her doorstep. She was waiting in a red dress on the porch, Amoreena and her nanny eating pizza on the steps as they waited for him.

Stepping out of his car, he straightened his tie and pulled his pants up more, looking at his wife like she was a star plucked from the sky, landing in this Virginia field for him.

She stood then, her satin dress flowing and exposing a leg as she walked down the steps to him, “Is this what you wanted?” She twirled in front of him to show it all off, her hair getting stuck in her lipstick and making her laugh.

“I love you,” is all he can say as she leaning in with a wide grin, surpassing the smile to kiss him gently, using her thumb to get all the lipstick off his bottom lip and chin.

“Love you too, cutie,” she winked, taking his hand and turning back towards Amoreena, “listen to Nanny, remember we love you and we will see you no earlier than 7:30 tomorrow, okay?”

“Yes ma’am!” She saluted, mouth full of pizza.

“And what are the new rules about coming into our bed in the morning?”

“Knock first, wait till you respond, don’t come in unless you say it’s okay,” Amoreena replied, sticking her tongue out at her as she remembered it all.

“Smartie pants,” Y/N smiled at her, “come give us a hug, don’t get pizza on my dress, please.”

Amoreena wiped her sleeve over her mouth before running into her mother's open arms, they shared goodbye kisses before it was Spencer’s turn. She held him so tight it felt wonderful, “goodnight Lovey, I’ll see you tomorrow morning, have the best sleep ever for me?”

“I’ll see you in dreamland,” she replied, kissing his cheek gently before she pulled back.

“Have fun!” Nanny called from the porch as Amoreena skipped back to her.

“We will,” Spencer replied, taking Y/N’s hand and leading her to the passenger side, he opened her door and helped her inside, insuring her dress was inside before closing the door.

Jogging back to his door, he got in and put on his seatbelt. He threw the car in reverse and turned around by the barn, heading down the driveway, not saying a single thing as Y/N stared at him.

“You’re really not going to tell me anything?” She shook her head, licking her lip before biting it as she huffed.

“We’re going to Richmond, Virginia, to read,” he gave her one hint.

“Hmm,” she smiled, “I’m sure you won't tell me the title, so Mr. I can remember every book ever, what’s a random line in it?”

“You’re smart,” he teased her, “but for the brilliant green of the huge leaves that spread from their summits in long, tremulous lines, dallying with the Zephyrs—”

“We’re going to the Edgar Allan Poe Museum!” She cut him off with a cheer.

He slows down on the barren dirt road, mouth wide open as she got it right, he turns to her as they come to a complete stop, “how the heck did you get that?”

“Yes!” she laughed, tossing her head back as she clapped and kicked her feet a little, so proud of herself, “I’m a librarian, Spencer! Did you think I wouldn’t know Eleonora?”

“That’s the most random sentence in the whole poem?” Spencer was shocked, she recalled it faster than he thought he would be able to if she read a line to him.

“My brother’s first motorcycle was a Zephyr,” she smiled at him, raising her eyebrows. “My brain is kinda like a filing cabinet, if you give me a word I can remember everything I’ve ever heard with that word included.”

He started to drive again, shaking his head as he paid attention to the road but still astounded by how amazing she is. “Amoreena gets that from you then, she could have both our eidetic memories together, that would be very interesting to see.”

“Eidetic memory?” She questioned.

“It’s what most people call photographic memory,” Spencer explained. “You can remember everything you hear which is why you and Amoreena are able to recall songs, books and movie facts so fast, while I can read back to you anything I’ve read without having to see it again, it’s forever in my mind.”

“So we’re both geniuses, cool,” Y/N smiled at him again, “sorry I ruined your surprise.”

“You just know where we’re going,” he reminded her, laying his hand on hers, interlocking their fingers as he drove.

They had an hour alone before the real date started.

So she showed him all of her favourite songs, including some of Amoreena’s playlists so he could get familiar with them before their trip to Rhode Island. Her voice was impeccable, she knew all the words and harmonies, often opting to cove background voices he wouldn’t have even known were there if it wasn’t for her.

She loved music in a way that intrigued him, she enjoyed music with a story. Much like the reason she loved books so much, she enjoyed picturing the happy places in her mind that the songs were able to take her to, they filled her with glee and hope as she sang to her heart's content. Taking short breaks to explain the meanings of songs, to recite the best lyrics and why the songs are close to her heart.

“Do you want to hear the song that reminds me the most of you?” She asked between songs, pausing so that nothing else would start.

“Sure,” he blushed, nervous for what it could be and how she imagined him in her mind, hoping he could live up to it.

“I'm perfectly fine I live on my own, I made up on my mind, I'm better off bein' alone. We met a few weeks ago, now you try on callin' me, baby, like tryin' on clothes,”

She stares at him with a beautiful smile as she waits to see his reaction to the opening, finally singing when the beat drops, dancing softly in her seat as she belted the words out to him.

“So prove to me I'm your American Queen, and you move to me like I'm a Motown beat, and we rule the kingdom inside my room,” She brushed her hand across his jaw, teasing him as the words flow from her lips to his ears, she loves him and he can feel it with every syllable.

“And all at once, you are the one I have been waiting for, King of my heart, body and soul, ooh whoa! And all at once, you are all I want, I'll never let you go King of my heart, body and soul, ooh whoa,” she sings so softly, with a purpose, turning it down a little so that he can talk to her.

“I love you,” he reminded her, “so much it hurts sometimes.”

“It’s like your heartstrings are tugging on each other, right?” She agreed, “like they want to jump out of our chests and run to each other.”

He nodded with a soft smile, reaching for her hand again holding it as he brought it to his mouth for a kiss, “queen of my heart.”

“Hmmm,” she thought over his words, “I’m pretty content with being princess still, Lady Amoreena is in line for the thrown, it’s part of her namesake after all.”

“Does the kingdom have a name?”

“You know the Elton John song Goodbye Yellow Brick Road?” She waited for his nod, “my grandma called it Ozellous so it’s like wizard of Oz but I added the 'ellous' because people always said they were jealous of our farm.”

He’s trying his best to keep his eyes on the road when all he want’s to do is look at her smile, to see her pupil change as she recalls the loving memory, it’s his favourite thing to do. Better than any movie or play, seeing her face was better than looking at the most expensive art piece. He was so in love with all of her.

“Were you like Amoreena as a kid?”

“Oh yeah,” she laughed, “bullied hardcore for it too, kids always told me to shut up cause I’d add facts to conversations I wasn’t a part of.”

“I would have loved to listen,” Spencer replied softly, knowing the feeling all too well.

They were only a few minutes away now, turning into the small town and passing quaint little homes and cottages. “Amoreena would love this drive, these are some interesting townspeople homes for her imagination, we should come back sometime this summer.”

His heart was going to actually explode, she was everything he never knew he needed.

“I’d love that,” he added as they pulled into the museum. “I’m a museum member and I’m a patron, so sometimes I donate rare pieces I find, they love me here.”

Her mouth opened to speak, but her eyes got caught on the twinkling lights in the distance, mesmerized by everything. Old cobblestone streets, brick buildings and wooden gates, it was straight out of the 1800s and absolutely fantastical.

“And it’s all ours for the night,” he put the car in park and turned to her, “wait here?”

She nodded, speechless as she continued to look out the window at everything. Spencer got out of the car, opening the back seat to grab and put on his jacket, straighten out his suit before opening her door and extending a hand to help her out.

“Princess,” he extended his arm for her to tuck her own under, he closed her door and escorted her through the gate and towards the garden.

The sun was just starting to set, 7 pm in early June being the most beautiful time of year in rural Virginia, the sky was a perfect purple as he leads her through the stone arches towards the picnic.

Her eyes sparkled with all the lights, wide and pupils blown as she took it all in. It was a fairytale, she was in a princess dress, he was the king of her heart and this was just the beginning of happily ever after.

“Spencer, whatever your middle name is, Reid,” she gasped, swatting his arm lightly with a smile growing on her face.

“It’s Walter,” he smiled right back.

He let go of her hand then and walked over to a table, turning on the record player and dropping the needle in the right spot. He did his research into some Taylor Swift songs, finding one that reminded him the most of Y/N and how much he loved her.

“May I have this dance?” He asks as she notices the all too familiar guitar strumming.

He reaches a hand out for her, pulling her in as she takes it, “I was so so lost before I found you in the park,” he explains the first verse, barely a whisper beside her ear as they start to sway.

There I was again tonight forcing laughter, faking smiles Same old tired, lonely place Walls of insincerity Shifting eyes and vacancy, vanished when I saw your face

“All I can say is it was enchanting to meet you,” he whispers once more, feeling the goosebumps bursting on her bare arms.

He spun her around, extending both their arms as she twirled out and then back into his embrace again with a giggle. She swayed back and forth, dancing with him like the night they got married in her field.

Your eyes whispered "have we met?" Across the room your silhouette starts to make it's way to me The playful conversation starts Counter all your quick remarks, like passing notes in secrecy

“And it was enchanting to meet you, All I can say is I was enchanted to meet you,” he sings them this time, spinning her out again as the chorus hits, her eyes widening as she began to smile wider than he’s ever seen before.

They sang the words together as they danced, smiling and laughing as they moved around the cobblestone. Finding a rhythm so perfect, so them, it was silly and not on beat in the slightest, mostly spinning, it was a spinning song if the album cover was any indication.

This night is sparkling, don't you let it go I'm wonderstruck, blushing all the way home I'll spend forever wondering if you knew I was enchanted to meet you!

“The lingering question kept me up, Two a.m., who do you love? I wonder till I'm wide awake! Now I'm pacing back and forth, wishing you were at my door, I'd open up and you would say, hey! It was enchanting to meet you, all I know is I was enchanted to meet you,” Y/N’s voice softer than ever as she sang her anxieties into his ear, remembering the day at the museum where she wondered if she could have him all to herself.

This night is sparkling, don't you let it go I'm wonderstruck, blushing all the way home I'll spend forever wondering if you knew This night is flawless, don't you let it go I'm wonderstruck, dancing around all alone I'll spend forever wondering if you knew I was enchanted to meet you

Spinning around in circles she leaves his grasp, dress circling in the wind and he watches her. She takes both his hands and spins around with him in a tight circle before pulling back in, their chests bumping as they laughed, happier than he’s ever been in his entire life, and she’s made him pretty happy in the last few weeks.

The girl of his dreams, dancing around him with a smile like she was making her own music video. This was a dream of hers he didn’t know, making it come true as it became a dream of his own.

He places his hands on her cheeks as he stares into her eyes, “this is me praying that this was the very first page, not where the storyline ends. My thoughts will echo your name until I see you again. These are the words I held back, as I was leaving too soon, I was enchanted to meet you,” he whisper’s the words, barely singing, more talking.

“Please don't be in love with someone else. Please don't have somebody waiting on you. Please don't be in love with someone else. Please don't have somebody waiting on you,” she sings right back to him, staring into his eyes as they stand still in the garden.

She pulls him into a kiss, breathing in deeply through her nose as they hold each other’s cheeks, unable to get closer as they kissed. Pulling away with a loud smooch sound, smiling before taking her hands in his, once more.

Spinning her around again as the beat drops once more, her smile more beautiful than the first time he saw it. He was so madly in love, he firmly believed he was in heaven.

This night is sparkling, don't you let it go I'm wonderstruck, blushing all the way home I'll spend forever wondering if you knew!!

This night is flawless, don't you let it go I'm wonderstruck, dancing around all alone I'll spend forever wondering if you knew I was enchanted to meet you!

Please don't be in love with someone else Please don't have somebody waiting on you

“Now go stand in the corner and think about what you did,” Taylor Swift's voice cuts into the beautiful moment as her songs change and the mood drastically changes.

Y/N bursts out in laughter, jumping lightly as she enjoyed the song, head-banging along as she danced by herself until Spencer turned the music off once again, “you’re so cute.”

“Thank you,” she bowed, “this is cute!”

“There’s a picnic basket in the fridge inside, and some wine if you think that’s a good idea?” Pointing towards the main house, she followed him towards the door.

“Oh, hello?” Her voice changed as she noticed the two black cats on the window, letting Spencer head inside for the basket as she talked to them.

“That’s Edgar and Pluto, the groundskeeper found them in the shed in 2012,” Spencer explains as he comes back out, basket in hand but she’s too busy with the cats to notice.

Petting both their faces, they stretch into her reach and bask in the feeling of her nails on their skin, Spencer would agree it felt nice. He loved the feeling of her hands in his hair, he must have been a cat in his last life.

“Amoreena wants her own indoor cat,” Y/N smiled wide at him, “she always wanted to call him Hercules like the Elton John song, almost like she knew you were her dad all along.”

She took his free hand then, following him towards the blanket in the grass, “how?”

“There’s a line in the song about Greek gods, but it says Hercules on her side and Diana in her eyes, and she does have your mom's eyes, right down to the colour of her iris,” Y/N looked at him like he was everything to her.

Spencer couldn’t speak, he just set the basket on the ground and ushered her to sit down beside him. She held the skirt of her dress up so she could sit crisscross applesauce on the blanket, draping her dress over her legs so she didn’t show anything off just yet.

“Every time I look at you I understand all her quirks and her facial expressions,” she added like she was trying to make him cry, “I’ve been looking at her for almost 8 years now, wondering who you were and now I know, and you’re so much better than I ever imagined.”

“Would you have looked for me when she turned 18?” Is all he can ask through his sniffles, trying to hold it together for her.

She nodded, “I was going to tell her soon anyway, she asks a lot of questions I’m not sure if you noticed.” Her giggle was priceless, “she had lots of questions when the goats were born this year and that meant her asking more about making human babies and I just said a special man helped me make my dreams come true, and she thought it was Rumpelstiltskin.”

Spencer couldn’t fight the laugh that erupted from him, leaning forward as he chuckled, making her laugh too. “Does she even know the whole story?”

“She’s only seen the 4th Shrek movie with him, she has no idea that he also takes the babies,” Y/N placed her hand on his knee gently, “If I get pregnant again, I’m going to tell her about how it all works as simply as possible, I want her to feel included in this and she’ll be less jealous if she sees this as a learning opportunity.”

“That’s a good idea,” he agreed, “I still can't believe she almost punched Michael for hugging me.”

“Oh, I can,” Y/N laughed again, “she was being bullied last year by an older kid and I said if someone upsets you or hurts you, sometimes it’s not that bad to hurt them back. Make them know you’re not weak and you care about yourself, and she gave a kid a black eye for tugging on her braid.”

Spencer couldn’t stop smiling, “that’s my girl.”

Y/N opened the picnic basket then, taking everything out with a smile as Spencer stared at her, thinking a million different thoughts about future kids, how Amoreena would grow up, seeing her as a big sister to hopefully many.

They both leaned forward and kissed softly, smiling as they pulled back, “so you like charcuterie?”

She laughed, “Amoreena called it shark coochie once, I can’t not think of that now.”

“How many kids do you want?”

“Have you ever read cheaper by the dozen?” She teased him. “As many as I can have, I have the funds thanks to my job and the farm and not having to pay a mortgage, I was going to have another baby next year anyway, I had an appointment and everything scheduled, I even tried to get them to contact Amoreena’s father for another sample but they said they couldn’t ask you outright for me.”

“They asked me if I wanted to give another sample when I asked if I could know my kids,” Spencer remembered the words exactly, “she said ‘You have four offspring so far, none of the other samples used have produced a child, the women were all IVF as well so it wasn’t your swimmer's fault if you wanted to donate again.’”

“I don’t want to know the truth, are you okay if we let her decide if she wants to find out at 18?” Y/N asked softly, “I’m content thinking you’re her father, I don’t want to know if it’s some other tall who-lookin’ genius, okay?”

“That’s perfect actually,” Spencer agreed, “and on the kids front, you don’t mind me being in my 70s when they all start going to University?”

“My dad is 68 with no signs of stopping, and he’s still fantastic with his grandkids,” Y/N always had a fact to combat his anxiety. “You have a lot of life left in you, I’ll take good care of you so that they have the best dad ever for as long as possible.”

Spencer was so in love with his family he felt like he was floating, laughing and smiling all meal long as they shared facts back and forth about their lives. Getting to know each other more and more as the seconds passed, he imagined it would be like this forever. She was like a bottomless pit of information, facts, stories and secrets. He loved every single one she shared with him.

She poured herself a second small glass of wine, “you know they say that one glass of wine every once in a while is actually good for the baby?”

“It doesn’t work that fast,” he reminded her, more like he reminded himself. He didn’t want to hope in the chance it didn’t happen right away.

“I had a nightmare last night for the first time in a long time, so I think it worked,” she teased him. “I won't know till June 10th, that's when my next period would be.”

“Nightmare?” It was the only part he picked up on, worried for her and wondering why she didn’t wake him up.

She nodded softly, “I found out I was pregnant and you never came home, and I got lost in the forest looking for you and then I remembered I could wake up.”

He rests his hand on her knee, rubbing his thumb against her bare skin softly, “I’m always coming home to you.”

“I know, when I got pregnant with Amoreena I had bad dreams in the first few weeks too, mostly about giving birth to nothing and being alone all over again, the subconscious and pregnancy hormones are mean as fuck when they hang out,” she laughed away the pain, “I know none of it is real.”

“Good,” he whispered, not knowing what really to say, he wasn’t used to soothing other people yet. Most people didn’t want his facts or concernment when something happened, just a hug normally.

She took a deep breath, pushing everything away, “good news, either my anxiety disorder is back in full swing or something’s working in here,” she laid her hand over her stomach, “either way, I’d like to try again tonight?”

He laughed, “we don’t need to make a baby every time you want to have sex?”

She got onto her knees then, crawling over the blanket and sitting right in Spencer's lap with her hands on both of his cheeks, “I want all your babies.”

He held her waist, pulling her in closer to his chest, “right now?”

She nodded, moving her dress out of the way to undo his belt, “no one is here right? It’s not like anyone would know?”

“Mhmm,” he agreed, kissing her neck as she unzipped his pants, moving his underwear out of the way just enough to free his hardening cock, she stroked it right there in the middle of the garden, staring down between their bodies in awe as he came to life.

Sitting up on her knees more, the slit of her dress made it a lot easier for her to show him her underwear. She was wearing just a thong, perfect for pulling to the side as she lowered herself onto him, ever so slowly.

She fixed her dress around them, completely calm and composed as he was fully inside of her, “you’re okay with this?”

He huffed a laugh out of his nose, dropping his forehead to her shoulder so he couldn’t buck into her and ruin the moment she was making, his hands moving to her hips, guiding her back and off him slightly before back down again, making her gasp.

“I thought you wanted to read?” She teased him as she started to ride him more, moving her hips in a way that took him in and out of her at just the right angle, her hands on his shoulders as she bounced on him lightly, he couldn’t even think straight. “Go on, read to me.”

He took a second to remember the words, mind totally somewhere else and not interested in a book at all when her boobs were right in his face.

“I am come of a race noted for vigor of fancy and ardor of passion,” the first sentence slipped past his lips as she kept going, he took a moment to kiss right under her ear before continuing.

“Men have called me mad; but the question is not yet settled, whether madness is or is not the loftiest intelligence—whether much that is glorious—whether all that is profound—does not spring from disease of thought—from moods of mind exalted at the expense of the general intellect.”

“Shit,” she moaned, pushing his hand down towards her clit, “you can multitask, smartie pants.”

His thumb was on a mission then, rubbing small circles against her pleasure point, she tossed her head back with her eyes closed as she continued to ride him, “I don’t hear you reading?”

He moaned softly in her ear at the feeling, and the fact she wanted to get off to hearing him recite something from memory, it was more euphoric than he could have ever imagined.

“They who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night. In their gray visions they obtain glimpses of eternity, and thrill, in ah- awakening, fuck,” he was trying his best to stay as composed as she was when he really just wanted to lay her against the blanket and fuck her into next week.

“to find that they have been upon the verge of the great secret,” Y/N whispered the end of the sentence, grinding down on him harder than before.

“In snatches, they learn something of the wisdom which is of good,” she whispered into his ear, biting his earlobe softly with a moan and he kept rubbing her clit, “you’re so good, Spencer, so so good," she paused to enjoy the moment before whispering in his ear once more, "And more of the mere knowledge which is of evil. They penetrate, however, rudderless or compass-less into the vast ocean of the "light ineffable," and again, like the adventures of the Nubian geographer, "agressi sunt mare tenebrarum, quid in eo esset exploraturi.”

Her words softer than ever and they were never going to get to the end of this poem, he'd never know how the rest of the words sound on her tongue, she pulled him into a kiss then, moaning into his mouth as they ground against each other, finding a perfect rhythm to bring them to the end.

“There, yes, fuck,” she whispered against his lips, pushing against him as she arched her back slightly, slipping away from his mouth as she did so.

He slammed into her then as he chased her lips, making her whimper one last time before she was shaking in his lap, her legs quivering as she finished on him, sending him over the edge and stilling as he came with a shudder. He held her so close, both of them breathing into each other's mouths as they came down, kissing and smiling as they stayed connected.

“We’ll name her Eleonora,” Y/N teased, pulling off him and laying back against the blanket.

He made sure her underwear was back in the right spot before covering her with her dress again and sliding himself back into his underwear.

“Amoreena and Eleonora have a good ring to it, we just need 10 more names,” he teased right back.

“Hopefully we have a little boy one day too,” she smiled as she tugged him down beside her, cuddling into her side as they stared up at the newly dark blue sky and the array of stars that decided to join them this evening.

“Even if it’s just Amoreena, I’ve never been happier in my whole life than when I’m with you,” he whispered. “Thank you.”

“For what?” She asked, purely to keep hearing his voice.

“Making me want to get up in the morning again, giving me a reason not to buy drugs for something euphoric to happen to me, showing me real love and proof that happiness is possible if you just chose to be happy,” he gave example after example.

“I thought I learned everything the world had to offer, but you’ve been showing me new little life hacks that make the world so much better, I see a future of bright colours and happiness and laughter for the first time ever, so thank you.”

She held him closer, “it’s been a pleasure falling in love with you, together, you deserve to love yourself. You’re so wonderful Spencer, it breaks my heart to know that anyone has ever made you feel the opposite.”

He couldn’t speak anymore, turning to kiss her neck and cheek so he had something to do that wasn’t crying. He loved her so incredibly deeply that he felt like he was an anchor, dropping to the bottom of her deepest ocean, without a single plan to leave.

tag list: @shemarmooresfedora @spencers-dria @spookyspence @reidsfish @manuosorioh @mochionly @samuel-de-champagne-problems @jswessie187

[tommymillerxgabriellunax]

Close To Home

Life In Lockdown Masterlist

Pairing - Poe Dameron x F! Solo Reader

Warnings - Massive amounts of Covid talk in this chapter as it starts to effect our lovely little squad, so if that upsets you please don’t read, I don’t want anyone to be triggered or upset by this content <3

Month 2 – April 2020

As the weeks went on, you found yourself getting more and more used to remote working. Your boss had made a lunch time finish on a Friday a weekly thing and you were grateful for it. Poe was getting every Friday off, and Rose got to finish at 3pm on a Friday. You and Poe were working round each other better, you’d gotten used to his singing and he got used to you getting up to wander round the room and stretch every hour or so. The novelty of having people around all day had worn off for BeeBee, he would choose to spend an entire day with either Poe or you and lie by your feet for the day. Rose’s idea of doing something each evening had stuck and you had set up a weekly plan of things to do. Movie nights became a Friday night tradition. Rose had ordered relaxation colouring books for each of you and that became your Monday night routine. There was a YouTube marathon on Tuesdays, you’d all found a series to binge together on Wednesdays and you played board games on Thursdays. Poe was teaching you to cook, you could make basic things but he was much better than you were and you’d asked him to help you learn. Rose loved teasing your about how cute you both looked and how domestic it was. Things were still strange but everyone was getting used to it.

Rose and Finn occasionally took walks after work, just the two of them. Poe had just arrived back home with BeeBee. He wandered into the living room and found you sitting on the sofa crying your eyes out. He was by your side in an instant, pulling you into his arms and rubbing your back.

“Sweetheart, what’s wrong?”

“My dad” you sobbed “He has the virus; he’s in the hospital on a ventilator”

“Oh sweetheart, I’m so sorry!” he pulled you tighter “He’ll be fine, I’ve never met a man as strong and stubborn as Han Solo!”

“Mum said he’s really ill, she’s not even allowed to go and see him”

“It’s not fair”

“I just want to go and see mum and hug her”

“I know sweetheart, I know”

Poe held you until you eventually cried yourself to sleep. He pulled you onto him, and grabbed the blanket from the back of the sofa and draped it over you. BeeBee jumped up onto the sofa and lay by your legs. Your body heat and the heat from the blanket lulled Poe to sleep. When Finn and Rose came back a little while later they eyed you suspiciously. The sound of Rose’s keys against the coffee table woke Poe.

“This looks romantic” Finn said

“Far from, I’ve just held her whilst she cried herself to sleep” Poe replied, glaring at his friend

“What’s wrong?” Rose asked

“Han’s got the virus; he’s in hospital on a ventilator”

“Oh my god, when did that happen, is he alright?”

“I don’t really know” Poe shrugged “She was really upset, I only got the basic information from her”

“I’ll phone Leia” Rose replied “To get more information but also to check on her”

Finn nodded “That's a good idea”

“I should text Ben.” Poe said “Then we need to work out what to do here. I don't want to put her to bed before dinner, I know she’s exhausted herself crying but she needs food in her system, as much as she probably won’t want it”

“We can make a start on dinner, wake her when it’s ready and make sure she eats at least a little then she can get some sleep” Finn said

Poe managed to lift you off him enough to move, he laid your head on a pillow and made sure the blanket still covered you. BeeBee got up and moved along the couch so he could snuggle against your stomach. Poe headed to the kitchen and made a start on dinner with Finn’s help. Rose sat on the bottom stair and called Leia. She was on the phone for 10 minutes before joining the guys in the kitchen.

“What did she say?” Finn asked

“He had a few symptoms so they called the doctor yesterday and he was told to go in and get checked out, they didn't want to worry Y/N and Ben so they just kept it between them at that point, the hospital got him tested and obviously he had it so they said he would get kept in overnight but he started to struggle to breathe so they put him on the machine. They don’t know when or if he’ll come back around”

“Oh god” Finn replied

“We just have to take care of her” Rose said “We know how close she is to her parents and not being able to be with them is going to be so hard for her”

“She has us” Poe replied “And we’ll be here for her day and night, no matter what time”

“Absolutely” Rose nodded “I’ll wake her for dinner”

The next week was difficult, you’d asked for some time away from work as you knew you would never be able to concentrate whilst your thoughts were all about your father. He hadn’t been getting better but he also hadn’t gotten any worse, which the doctors said was a really good thing. Poe and Rose had both taken a few days off to make sure someone was with you and helping keep your mind off things. You and Poe were on a walk with BeeBee one afternoon when your phone rang.

“It’s mum” you said to Poe before answering the phone. He gently took hold of your arm and led you over to a wall where you could sit. He could only hear your side of the conversation but the fact you hadn’t burst into tears yet made him feel more positive. “I’ll speak to you later mum, love you. Bye”

“How’s things?”

“Dad came off the ventilator this morning” you replied, happy tears appearing in your eyes “He’s breathing on his own and the doctors are really happy with his progress”

“That’s great news sweetheart. And it’ll be a load off your mind knowing he’s doing okay”

“Yeah, it really is” you replied “Thank you, you’ve helped keep me going this last week or so. I really appreciate it”

“I’m here for you anytime sweetheart” Poe replied

“I appreciate it more than you'll ever know. It's been so scary seeing all the stuff on the news, I guess I just didn't think it would end up so close to home”

Poe held his arms open and you fell into his hug gratefully. Poe gave the best hugs in the entire world. He hugged tightly and it made anyone he hugged feel secure and content.

Easter was very much a non event, the weather wasn't great so you were inside all day. Poe cooked a nice meal for everyone and you sat and watched a lot of TV whilst eating all of the Easter snacks you'd ordered in with the food shop. You were all happy to have a few days off work, Finn had a few weeks off whilst the schools were closed for the spring break. A few days after Easter, your father was released from the hospital. He still wasn't 100% back to his normal self but he was really glad to be back in his own home. You face-timed with him and your mother every day, just to check up on how they were both doing. You knew it wasn't easy on Leia either. She had to take care of Han plus do everything herself at home, whilst trying to work. Finn decided to take up gardening whilst he had free time, he ordered loads of plants and gardening tools online and got to work as soon as they arrived. Your garden had never really been full of plants because you and Rose were always too busy and neither of you were that into gardening. Finn cut down all the bushes, planted loads of flowers and painted the fences. The small fence that separated the patio from the grass was painted a sky blue and all of the surrounding fences were white. Poe helped Finn with the painting, whilst you and Rose cleaned up all the garden furniture. Once you were done, it looked like a whole new garden.

As the month went on, things with everyone's work got quieter. You were no longer working full days, Monday to Wednesday you only worked from 11am until 3pm, Thursday you worked 9am-12pm and Friday was a day off. Rose only had to work Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Poe no longer had to do any work. He was luckily still getting paid but his work just didn't have anything else they could do remotely. They told him to keep checking his work emails just incase anything did come in. It took a while to adjust to all of the free time. Working from home had been strange anyway but only working for part of the time made it even weirder. Finn was still working his normal hours after the school break. Friday became a cooking day. Poe continued to teach you how to make meals, and sometimes the pair of you would bake.

Rose liked to come on walks with BeeBee when she had the spare time, the park was everyone's favourite place to go. It became a lifeline to everyone. The stay at home order still said you were only able to go out once a day for some exercise. You all began to look forward to walk time so you could get to your park. You could walk all the way round it twice before BeeBee got bored. You would always stop at the kiosk and get a coffee or an ice cream, whilst the dog ran after his ball.

“This is his dream” Poe chuckled as he watched Rose throwing the ball “He's getting to spend time with people he loves, he's getting much longer walks than normal and he gets to run after his ball a lot”

You smiled “Animals must be loving this lockdown thing, they get to spend so much time with their humans and don't have to stay home alone all day”

“Bee is loving living with you and Rose. He's always really happy when you guys come to visit us so all of us living together is great for him”

“I'm actually really enjoying it too, I had my reservations at first. Especially when Rose just mentioned Finn moving in. I didn't want to be the third wheel in my own home. And even when she said you were coming too, I wasn't sure we'd all manage to work around each other but thankfully we have and I couldn't be happier to be spending this lockdown with you guys. Especially with how much you helped me when my dad was ill”

“I'm glad we're all together too. It's made things feel so much better knowing that anytime I have a bad day I get to spend it with my best friends. Living with Finn is great but sometimes when him and Rose are all loved up it gets a bit annoying. I mean not that I'm not happy for them because I absolutely am, they're a great couple but yeah”

“No, I totally get that. Being the 3rd wheel isn't easy” you nodded “They're adorable, but sometimes it sucks to be left out so I'm glad we have each other during this lockdown”

“Me too, I think you're the only one that gets what it's like to be 3rd wheel to them” Poe chuckled

The final few days of the month were difficult, Rose fell ill with suspected Covid. She had all of the symptoms but she didn't feel overly ill. Finn moved into the spare room with Poe, he didn't want to get ill whilst he was still so busy with work. You looked after Rose, bringing her food and plenty of fluids to keep her going. You were glad that she didn't have a really bad case of it, but you worried for the rest of you.

So here’s the next part. I hope if you read this far that you enjoyed it and you’re still enjoying the series. Your comments would mean the world to me <3 Have a lovely weekend!

[radioactivepeasant]

Fic Prompts: Star Wars Wednesday

Because Disney can pry the Finn Skywalker headcanon from my cold, dead, fingers. And because Disney can’t stop me from reworking their movies if I darn well please.

Most of the fortress had been picked over by scavengers years ago. Any Imperial memorabilia had long since been looted and either auctioned off or confiscated by the First Order. Really, that was the only reason the scout team had considered it as a potential base at all. It had already been gutted, and was pretty well beneath the notice of Kylo Ren unless he was up for sentimental tours.

The general didn’t find that very likely.

Mustafar was far from a hospitable world for most species, but the heat shielding of the fortress was still highly efficient. The scouts had set up a base camp in what looked like it had once been some kind of audience chamber. Nobody had felt like exploring alone. The whole castle just felt...off. 

The young leader of the scouts sat on a pile of rubble, head tilted like he was listening for something. He frowned and glanced down at his team.

“What, Trache?” he asked.

The Twi’lek raised his brows at Finn. “I didn’t say anything.”

Finn seemed confused. “You sure? I could’ve sworn-”

Finn?

Finn looked up again. "Rose, you heard Trache call me just now, right?"

Rose Tico set down a power lamp and plugged it into their Artoo unit, then shook her head. “Sorry Finn,” she said, “All I heard was Artoo.”

Finn.

He whirled, squinting into the darkness of the derelict fortress. “There! You guys heard it that time, right?”

Rose fidgeted awkwardly. "Finn...I didn't hear anything."

Finn.

Finn turned again. He felt as though someone had tied a string around his soul and was pulling. As if under some other power than his own, the boy began to stumble into the shadows.

"W- what are you doing?" Trache hissed.

"Gotta check something out," Finn mumbled. He could just make out what looked like a figure, standing at the end of the corridor. "It's...it's okay. I think it's the Force."

His scout team's protests faded into static behind him. There was nothing but the voice.

Finn. Come to me.

Finn slowly reached down and loosened his blaster in its holster. There was a possibility that he was hearing this voice in his mind. And that had to mean enemies.

"Where are you?" he asked, tensed and ready to fight.

The shadowy figure he had glimpsed before reappeared, further away. It stood, as if waiting. Then it raised one arm, beckoning.

Finn didn't sense anything particularly hostile about the stranger, but he was wary nonetheless. He eased forward, following the dark shape into another chamber. The closer he got, the more he realized that it wasn't made of pure shadow after all. A faint flicker of blue light outlined the person, if a person it was, slowly illuminating more details. A black tabard. A heavy gauntlet. A cape that fell to the floor and seemed to swallow all light that touched it.

The rhythmic hiss that Finn had taken for some kind of machinery in the fortress took on a new volume.

It sounded like breathing.

Finn stopped dead in his tracks. He had seen that shape before. In the First Order barracks, as a little boy, he had seen that shape in the propaganda forced down the children's throats. 

"Aren't you dead?" he blurted out before he could stop himself. 

The giant inclined his head -- or, well, his helmet -- regally and turned. He gestured to one side.

"Walk with me."

The authoritative voice brooked no argument. 

Finn knew he should have been running. That was Darth Kriffing Vader, or his ghost, or a clone, or something. But...he didn't sense the kind of painful storm he'd always experienced around Kylo Ren. There was no hatred, filling the air with danger. Just a strange echo of regret.

With one hand firmly on the butt of his blaster, he gritted his teeth and stepped closer. 

"The Force is with you, young one," the late Sith Lord remarked, "but you are not a Jedi yet."

That rankled a little bit. Finn knew he couldn't do all the things Rey could yet. The General had told him that his connection to the Force was more like hers than Rey's, but he still didn't know what that meant. That didn't mean he wasn't learning. He was just going at his own pace.

"Maybe I'm not," he said, "But I will be."

Will I be?

Darth Vader began to walk. Hands clasped thoughtfully behind his back, steps slow and measured. Relentless. What did he want? And why was he even here?

Reluctantly, Finn followed a half step behind. 

"I'm not hallucinating this, right? Because my team can't see you." Getting lured into the depths of the castle by the ghost of a Sith probably wasn't a good thing. "Why'd you call me?"

"I have been expecting you for some time," Vader said, tipping his helmet down as if observing Finn. "It was inevitable that you would find me here."

His footsteps echoed on the stone, but did not disturb so much as a single mote of dust. The hair on the back of Finn's neck rose when he looked down and saw only one set of footprints behind them.

"You know who I am." It was not a question. 

Swallowing hard, Finn nodded. His mouth was dry, and despite himself, his fingers trembled. Like a death sentence the name fell from his lips.

"Darth Vader."

Abruptly, the man turned on his heel. His cape flared out around him as he raised a finger almost in warning.

"That name no longer has any meaning for me," he said sternly.

"Then..." Finn wrinkled his brow and tried to remember the legend. "You're um, you're a Skywalker-?"

His companion nodded. "I suspected that if I had chosen my true form, you would not have known me."

He raised his helmet as the chamber emptied out into another set of corridors. "Come. There is something I must show you."

Well. This was going to make an interesting story to tell the General later. Finn pulled the collar of his jacket up and shivered.

"Dar- I mean, uh...Master Skywalker? You didn't answer my question before. Aren't you dead?"

Anakin did not slow his steps. "The Force, young one, is a pathway to many abilities that some may consider to be...unnatural."

A wry chuckle wrenched itself from Finn's lips. He shook his head and took a jogging half step to keep up with the ghostly warrior. "You're telling me."

Anakin glanced down at him again. Finn wasn't sure how he knew the ghost's eyes were on him, but somehow he could guess where to look.

"You show remarkably little trepidation in the face of the impossible," he commented.

It was strange, but Finn was almost beginning to feel comfortable with the conversation. He shrugged. "Nobody ever told me how the Force was supposed to work. How am I supposed to know what's possible and what's not?"

He jumped when Anakin tipped back his helmet and laughed. It was a deep, rolling sound, utterly at odds with the mechanical whoosh of his respirator. 

"Indeed! Do not lose your open mind, Finn. It will serve you well."

"Did anybody ever tell you," Finn huffed, "That you make even compliments sound ominous?"

Another low chuckle. "Yes. Your father did."

His father?!

What was the ghost talking about?

Finn scowled at him. "Whoa, hold on. How do you know my father? I don't even know my father!"

Under his breath he added, "I don't even know what I'm doing here."

Abruptly, he began to sense a complicated tangle of emotions from the ghost of Anakin Skywalker. Regret, anger, concern.

"You remember nothing, child?"

Sometimes Finn thought he did remember. But they were just images. Feelings. A woman's voice and strong arms. A man's smile. Sometimes he heard snatches of a song in his dreams, always just out of reach by the time he opened his eyes.

Other times, the dreams were not so kind. Flashes of an old man, reaching for him even as he was shot in the back. His own tiny hands reaching desperately for an old woman screaming a name he couldn't hear. He wondered sometimes if they had been his grandparents. 

The Resistance was his family now. Rey and Chewie were his family. Poe and BB-8 were his family. The General was his family. But in his heart, Finn still wanted closure. To at least know where he had come from. 

"I...remember my grandfather dying." Finn said haltingly. 

"Not your grandfather," Anakin corrected him. "Your mother's cousin. Your grandfather died long before your birth."

He quickened his pace before Finn could insist on an answer. Through stone galleries and ominous archways he continued with a single-minded determination. He did not stop until he had reached what had once been an impressively secure door, long since reduced to ruin by looters. Inside sat a strange dome-like structure that reminded Finn of an egg.

"Did you see that in my head? Is that like a thing you can do?" Finn demanded. He was determined to get the truth. Maybe he could "sense" it somehow. "How did you see it if I can't?"

Anakin did not immediately answer. He waved his hand over the dome, and with a rumbling groan it separated neatly into two halves. It was an old-fashioned hyperbaric chamber. A few lights still flickered dimly inside. Anakin reached down to touch one small screen, and a hologram sprang up. A young man in Rebellion era fatigues smiled up at them from the hologram. Old though it was, the holo was still recognizable. 

"What the- That's Luke Skywalker!" Finn realized.

Anakin nodded. "He was no older than you are now when my spies brought me this image." He seemed almost lost in nostalgia for a moment. "Truly, I would have torn the very fabric of the universe apart to find him."

Finn watched the ghost, noting that he cupped the hologram in his hands as though he held something infinitely precious. 

"You...kept a holo of him in your chamber?" Seemed a little odd for a Sith.

He was pretty sure Ren didn't keep holos of his parents.

"Of course." Anakin did not look away from the tiny, grinning face of Luke. "He is my son."

Finn sat down carefully on the seat within the chamber. His feet didn't even touch the floor. "Hey...Master Skywalker?" he asked, "How did you know my grandfather died before I was born? If it was before I was born, I wouldn't have had any memory of that. Buried or no. Did you...meet him in the afterlife or something? Do all ghosts know each other?"

He sensed hesitation as Anakin answered, "No, I...I was...there."

That could mean a lot of things. "Did you kill him?" Finn guessed, "Like, was he a Rebel? Or a Jedi?"

He heard the creaking of leather as Anakin's hands tightened into fists.

"He was a rogue and peasant Sith. A knave who chased after power at the cost of his kin," Anakin snarled. 

Finn jolted back. A Sith?

A horrible thought slid into the back of his mind. What if his family had given him willingly to the First Order? What if they expected him to follow in his grandfather's footsteps?

"So...what does that make me?" he rasped. 

The tension drained quickly from Anakin's shoulders. He turned away from the hologram of his son and raised a spectral hand to rest against Finn's cheek. It did not pass through him, as he had expected it to. Instead, it lingered, like the brush of a curtain. 

"You are," Anakin said, almost reverently, "A valiant son of a worthy father. And the beloved grandchild of a grandmother who deserved a better life than she was given."

The Force was almost screaming at him that the answers to his questions were at last before him, but Finn was afraid to believe it. Afraid to get his hopes up and be wrong. If, after all this, his growing suspicion was wrong, he wasn't sure he could bear it. 

"Master Skywalker, please," he begged, "I don't know why I'm here, I don't know what you want from me. Just tell me the truth? Did you know my grandfather?"

The other glove rose, and Finn found his face being gently cradled by an ex-Sith Lord.

“No,” Anakin answered, quiet and inevitable. “I am your grandfather.”

[chcrrysprite]

10 fandoms, 10 characters, 10 tags :)

rules: show us your ten favorite characters from ten fandoms and then tag ten people to do the same.

i was tagged by @manonisamelon :) thank you!! i love to do these because it means i get to be extra and slap a filter on some screencaps. and also be opinionated. i was going to do this earlier on mobile, but tumblr started running Super slow and then didn’t save my draft, so here’s take two!

the movies / tv shows aren’t in any particular order, and some of them are kind of random...i evidently don’t watch that many things, so it took me a while to come up with ten LMAO. feel free to give your opinion about my favs in the replies...i’m interested to see if we have any in common or really don’t.

1.) theo raeken - teen wolf i think we all knew this one was going to be first. love u <3 alternate: liam or hayden, probably :) 

2.) layla keating - all american i don’t even watch all american anymore because of the way the writers and the fanbase treats her :,( unproblematic but still for whatever reason controversial fav. no one could ever get me to hate her. argue with the wall  alternate: asher 

3.) jane villanueva - jane the virgin i’ve been re-watching jane the virgin for the third time and i think she’s the only one who i’ve Never had any problems with liking. so sweet and motivated, and even though she’s made some bad decisions (coughcough love triangle coughcough), idc what anybody says, she’s a good mom who does not deserve slander ! alternate: rafael 

4.) john murphy - the 100 the 100 was genuinely a terrible show in all honesty, but he + emori made it worth watching through till the end...kind of. he’s the second murdery mf with childhood trauma on this list, but he stopped trying to kill people, so he’s good now :) alternate: emori (let me into ur relationship pls)

5.) alexis rose - schitt’s creek i just think that she was one of the funniest and i love her <3 she literally always had good love interests too. every single relationship was interesting. wish she would’ve gotten her endgame but i like to think she’s doing big things on her own :) alternate: stevie, patrick, david

6.) adam groff - sex education some of you are going to Hate me for this one but like,,, season two was His. love his development and everybody on here knows i’m a slut for redemption arcs so this shouldn’t be a surprise. alternate: eric, maeve, jackson

7.) nick miller - new girl absolute disaster of a man. keeps all of his overdue bills and unfiled paperwork in a shoebox in his closet. in So Much Debt. but he writes books and respects women and i fuckin love him alternate: winston, cece

8.) poe dameron - star wars sequel trilogy hhhhhh. i know that i loved his leadership skills and personality when i was watching the movies, but also i can’t recall anything he actually Did at the moment because i’m too busy looking at him. like. god. not to be horny on main or anything, but.... Whew Sir

9.) lupe - plan b (2021) plan b doesn’t really have a fandom and i’m biased because *victoria moroles* but pls,,, i love her so much. my favorite line of the whole movie came from her - “glad to know you spend your free time thinking about what my pussy looks like, megan” - and i’ve watched the movie twice and cried Both Times at the ending scene with her dad. once again, not to be horny on main, but there is literally No way to deny i like girls too after this movie LMFAOOO alternate: sunny! she and lupe are pretty much equal here, but i’ll take any excuse to talk about victoria, lupe, or hayden hdbfjs

10.) neil perry - dead poets society </3 </3 </3 help me alternate: todd or charlie

okay!! tags!! obviously you don’t have to do the whole thing with the pictures and explanations, i just like to waste my own time </3

@inabottlelikelightning @thecenturiestrickle @frustrateddumbbar @li0nh34rt @curlsinthewind @rosesraeken @idk-ilike5sos @theowhy @edge0fmydesiree @thiamficrecs��� :)

once again...very much inviting conversation in the notes :)

[alwritey-aphrodite]

Last Night

Pairing: modern!poe x reader

Word Count: 2.5 k

Warnings: I curse oops

Author’s note: Here it is! Part 2! Sorry the formatting is always so weird, I’m working on it I promise lol. I have the masterlist to the series linked if you want to read the previous chapter! Also, let me know if anyone is interested in being tagged! Based on the song Last Night by Ricky Montgomery, lyrics in bold!

Get Used To It Series Masterlist

I was born in ‘53 with all my life in front of me. I thought you’d care to notice, I just want you to notice me

“I applied for five jobs today.” You announced, entering your apartment. This statement was followed by your friends clapping and wooing, as if you had won a marathon and not simply handed in a few job applications. But, like Rey kept telling you, a small step forward is still a step forward. You still had time, you still had hope. You curtsied with a giggle, before joining the group at the dining room table, just about to play a board game. The only seat left was right across from Poe, and you sat down, knowing that you would spend the majority of the game lost in his gaze and overthinking every smile he sent your way.

“Your hair looks nice!” Rose said, smiling at you. She was the one who encouraged you to change your hair, the one who pushed you forward when you were doubting yourself.

“A good change, huh?” You shot her a smile as thanks, never quite sure how to accept complaints, but your friends knew this, so this was an accepted “thank you” from you.

“I already said it looked good.” Rey muttered good naturedly.

“That’s not fair! You were with her when she got it done! This is the first time it’s been revealed to me!” Rose shot back, maintaining a smile the whole time.

“At least you said something.” Rey added with a look towards Finn, who threw his hands up in surrender.

“You look beautiful, stunning, spectacular, fabulous… I’m running out of adjectives.”

“Fine. You’re excused from not recognizing my hair change because of your complements,” you finalized, giggling, “Can we start the game now?”

Everyone agreed, and the game was soon started once everyone was ready. You, however, weren’t thinking about the game. Your mind was where it had been for the past few weeks. Poe. He was always on your mind. And now, you were over analyzing everything he’s said to you, or rather, everything he hasn’t said to you. He was normally the first to notice when you change your appearance, and was the one to call it out to everyone else. But today, he hadn’t said anything. It was all so weird. Maybe you really had been reading too much into the looks he sent your way. Even if you couldn’t have him the way you wanted, you just wanted him to notice you like he used to. You wanted things to be normal again, you wanted to put your feelings aside, but you couldn’t. Not until Poe told you what was going on.

Mama, maybe it’s today, maybe today he’ll say, “I don’t know what I’d do without you, don’t know what I’d do without the words that I hear right now. I’m sorry I’ve been gone, and I’m coming home. I’m coming home.”

Once Rey has beaten all of you at Monopoly, you had all gone to the living room, to your normal spots throughout the room, and Rey turned on some movie, just for background noise to your conversations. Everything was the same as it had been the past few weeks. However, you couldn’t help but be hopeful that today, Poe would tell you what was going on with him. He would say he loved you, that he wanted to be with you, but he just didn’t know how. You knew that wasn’t the case though, and your hope quickly died out as the minutes ticked by.

You had become so frustrated, both with yourself and the situation, that you decided to tell Rey once everyone had left. Rey always gave you the best advice, and she was honest and would tell you if you were being dumb, and that’s what you needed right now. You needed her to tell you that you were just being stupid, that you were reading too much into everything, and that he didn’t love you and you didn’t love him.

“I just… I don’t know anymore,” you began, “it’s all so confusing. He makes my heart beat faster than it should when he smiles at me, and every time I’m with him I’m so happy, and it just feels right. But I’m probably reading too much into the situation, he doesn’t love me, and I’m just being stupid. Right?”

“Actually, we’ve all noticed the little looks he gives you. Rose and I have been talking about it for ages.”

Your mouth was agape, and she simply laughed.

“Oh, come on, it’s so obvious.”

“Then why doesn’t he say anything! I just… I just want him to say he loves me, that he doesn’t know what he’d without me, that I feel like home to him. I want the whole rom-com experience!” You both laughed at this, and soon, Rey was giving you reassurance instead of her tough-love.

“Just give him time.”

“I will.” With this, you retired to your rooms, and you spent the larger chunk of the rest of your night thinking about Poe. Damn, did you have it bad for him.

Last night, I was fine, dropping lines and getting by. This goal, bet it’s a role, smoking kine and actin’ so disgraceful

You thought about how quickly things have changed. Maybe it's all in your head, and things are still exactly the same, maybe you’re the only thing that’s changed. Maybe the only thing that’s different is the fact that you're aware of your feelings. For the most part anyway. It’s still weird to say that you’re in love with Poe Dameron, even if it’s the truth. You think about how just last week, everything was normal. You could hang out in groups, or even just you and Poe, and have things be normal. But now, it’s all different. Now, you’re different. Now, you, for the most part, understood your feelings towards Poe. It had started to get difficult to ignore and downplay the butterflies he set loose in your stomach everytime he sent you that smile, or even winked at you. Everytime he did, you were sure you had died.

The worst part is that you can’t even blame Poe. You can’t blame him for not reciprocating your feelings (even if your friends were convinced he does) or for making you feel this way. Stupid Poe Dameron, making you fall in love with him. But really, you were the one complicating things. Even if no one else thought things were different, they were to you. You still weren’t sure if it was a good different or a bad different. At the moment, it was a bad different, with all the confusion and emotions you were feeling, not sure of what to do or say to him. It was almost as if you had never spent time with him before, despite the fact that you had met him the week you moved to the city, and had been his best friend ever since, and you had spent time with each other at least once a week. But maybe he couldn’t even tell things were different. Maybe it was just you.

O-oh she knows time is on my side, o-oh she knows she’s lost control, she’s lost control, she’s lost control (I’m coming home)

It had taken you hours to fall asleep, the last time you glanced at the clock you noticed it was nearing 4 AM, so you thought because it was a Saturday you could sleep in. Rey, however, had other plans, and she was in your room to open the blinds at 7 AM. You only grumbled some words that sounded vaguely like bitch, sleep, early, fuck, and harsh, to which Rey only laughed in response. She left your room, but returned when she realized that you would not follow her on your own accord. So, she sat down on the edge of your bed, and started to talk. You were pretty sure that she realized you would fall asleep if she left you alone for too long.

“We have plans today.”

“No we don’t.” Your reply was mumbled into your pillow, but she understood what you meant.

“Yes we do. We’re all helping Rose move, remember.”

You vaguely remembered Rose excitedly telling you about the fancy new apartment she found, and how perfect it was, and you were genuinely looking forward to seeing it and for her to be so happy with it. But, your brain running on 3 hours of sleep at 7:15 in the morning had no recollection of this memory, or of your promise to help her move. You only grumbled again, so Rey grabbed both your hands, and pulled you to sitting, and then pulled you off the bed and onto your feet. She was laughing, and despite your shitty attitude and lack of sleep, you were smiling too.

“Coffee?”

You only made a face in response, one that she understood to mean, “What the fuck do you think? You just woke me up and you know I didn’t sleep for more than 5 hours.”

Rey answered her own question, exiting your bedroom but leaving the door open, and going to make you your coffee, exactly how you liked it.

45 minutes later, you were in Rose’s old apartment, with your now cold coffee in hand, and all your friends there to help pack, sort, organize, and move Rose’s belongings. Rose thanked you all profusely, despite the fact that all of you, even yourself, had said that it wasn’t a big deal and that you were all happy to help. Still, she promised to buy you all dinner and most likely alcohol later. It was still too early to process when you got there, but as the day went on, your feelings towards Poe were making life difficult. You were probably being dramatic, but every time he smiled at you, you just wanted to grab his face and kiss him, and as the day went on, you felt your control slipping away. You knew you had to tell him, and you knew that your chance to tell him was slipping away as the days went by. You knew that, sooner or later, he would find someone he loved, and that would be the end of everything. You would still be his friend, but it would all be too much for you, and you would be miserable. You had this revelation while organizing and packing Rose’s bookshelf, and you were snapped out of your spiral when a heavy book collided with the floor.

Isn’t it so interesting the way he branded all he touched? Oh, well, somewhere in my heart of hearts I knew it all along but I’m still finding out

The hours and hours of helping Rose pack had made everyone quite and exhausted, so no one was talking much. It was difficult, when you were all spread throughout her apartment. You didn’t mind much, but you wished you could have someone to talk to, to pull you from the ever tightening spiral of emotions you were falling into. You thought about how you would compare everyone you ever dated in the future to Poe, and you aren’t even in a relationship with him. You’d been doing this since you’ve known him, but you’d done it with the rest of your friends too. How they weren’t as sweet as Rose, or as understanding of your humor like Finn was, and how they weren’t nearly as interesting as Rey. But now, it was different. The only thing you’d be able to think of would be how they didn’t make your heart beat insanely fast or make it threaten to stop altogether when they looked your way for more than 30 seconds. You had come to terms with the fact that you were 100%, head over heels, completely in love with Poe Dameron. And that was making your life difficult.

Maybe it’s something else this time, maybe it’s something I can’t find. Maybe it’s something, maybe it’s something, maybe it’s nothing.

Your day of helping Rose pack had come to a close around 6 PM, and you were still running on only 3 hours of sleep. To say you were exhausted was an understatement. So, as soon as you had eaten the pizza that Rose had promised, you were immediately even more tired than before. Poe, who had been looking at you almost the entire evening, and practically half of the day when he should have been helping Rose, was the first to notice this.

“You can lay on my shoulder or something… if you wanted to.” He whispered to you, causing you to whip your head away from Rey, who was talking, to look at him, eyes wide.

“I know you’re tired.”

And then he smiled. That bastard knew what he was doing. That damn smile that caused you to melt every time it was directed to you.

“Are you sure?”

“Positive. Now, please shut up and go to sleep.”

You let out a sleepy little laugh, before laying your head on his shoulder as he wrapped his arm around you, and then placed his head softly on top of yours. You relaxed immediately, and fell asleep quickly.

“It’s only 7, what’s up with her?” Finn asked, to which Rey immediately shushed him, explaining in a hushed voice that you had barely slept. She knew why too, because you had told her in the car, and she smiled softly while gazing at how peaceful you and Poe looked, and he still had that damn smile plastered on his face. He may have been listening to whatever the rest of his friends talking about, but his mind was elsewhere.

Baby, it’s nothing new, since the start it was all planned out and always hard. “Sorry I’ve been gone, I’m coming home, I’m coming home.”

Rey woke you up at 10, when she was getting ready to leave. You had all spent practically all day at Rose’s, and you were all exhausted, but as soon as the time was spent talking and not working, no one wanted to leave. Rey, however, knew how much you needed to sleep, so she decided to bring you home. Poe shook you awake gently. It took a few moments for you to come to your senses, but once you did, you were already overthinking. Once you had caught up on the needed sleep, your mind was reeling. You didn’t talk on the short drive home, gazing out the window like you were in a sad, sappy, music video, thinking about Poe.

You knew you would only hurt yourself more by not telling him. Sure, if he didn’t reciprocate the feelings, it would be awkward, but you would get over it. But you kept telling yourself that it would change everything, that he doesn’t love you, that he would hate you. You would get hurt either way. You wanted nothing more than for him to confess his love to you, like your life was a shitty rom-com, but you were just being stupid. You would be happy just to know if there was a chance of him loving you as more than a friend. But you wouldn’t tell him, so you would never know.

[dgcatanisiri]

I’ll stand by this and die on this hill.

Whatever merits The Last Jedi has - and before you start debating me, I’m not saying it doesn’t have them, just that this outweighs them - it fails as a part of the ongoing narrative. It may be a fine standalone film, but as movie two of the Sequel Trilogy, movie eight of the Skywalker Saga, it fails to connect itself to the rest of the story, existing more in isolation than in concert. Rian Johnson’s Star Wars is VERY different from JJ Abrams’ Star Wars, a clash that makes it all too clear that Rise of Skywalker - and the Sequel Trilogy in general - was doomed to fail from the moment it was decided NOT to maintain the same writer across it.

It shifts gears, taking moments that were played for drama in the previous film (or films) and playing them for laughs. 

It drops plot paths, with Rian Johnson explicitly saying that he didn’t use the Knights of Ren because they “didn’t fit” the story he was telling. Or the fact that, if the movie is taking place shortly after TFA, then where is ANY mention of Starkiller, the massive superweapon and installation that the Resistance just blew up?

It demotes Finn, the character who was the lead male of the last film, to a “comedic” c-plot that ends up going in a cul-de-sac, one that even the film’s defenders have said could have been cut and nothing be lost. And, in particular, this is noticeable because the plot of TFA moved BECAUSE of Finn - without Finn, Poe doesn’t escape, Rey doesn’t get off Jakku, the Resistance doesn’t go to Starkiller and destroy it. TFA hinged on Finn. TLJ treats him like a vestigial limb it can’t sever.

(No, really, based on what TFA establishes, FINN is the counterbalance to Kylo Ren - Kylo is a scion of a powerful line of Force users, Finn didn’t even have a NAME until TFA began, Kylo is the face of the First Order, Finn was a faceless stormtrooper, which is why the moment he first takes off his helmet means so much, Kylo was raised by heroes of the Republic and turned to the First Order, Finn was raised by the First Order and turns his back on it... The thematic parallels between them are ALL FUCKING OVER TFA! But TLJ wants him to go away, and there’s no chance for him to rebuild that plot momentum in Rise of Skywalker.)

Also on the level of connection to the previous film... Why the HELL is a coma patient stuffed in a storage closet, rather than the medbay with doctors monitoring him? And he’s then repeatedly tazed by Rose, which is again played for laughs. Finn’s injuries are played as a joke.

With Finn’s demotion, it elevates Kylo Ren, the villain, an explicit parallel to neo-natsees (because the Empire ALWAYS had its roots in natsee imagery, and the First Order is explicitly drawing on those, just like neo-natsees), into the lead male position. 

Rey ends up reduced to his prize - over the course of TFA, her interactions with him were, in order, him rendering her unconscious and kidnapping her, torturing her, killing her mentor (his own father), and grievously wounding Finn, the first person in her life who came back for her, which was part of her driving characterization in the previous film. Her motivations are reduced to proving to Luke that she won’t be like Kylo Ren, and then trying to get someone she has no motivation to genuinely care about to redeem himself.

That “redemption,” I say again, is being offered by her after, again, she was kidnapped and tortured by him, she watched him kill Han Solo, who she saw as a paternal figure herself, and he put Finn, someone she’d already come to care for and who was the first person in her life to come back for her, in a coma. What motivation is there for her to TRY to redeem him? And if you want to say “Force Bond,” then that means that something is forged between her and Kylo, without her consent, that makes her care for him, actively manipulating her mind, and this just... happens.

The whole “Rey’s parents” thing is also a problem because it is ignoring HER reaction - it’s all about subverting the audience’s expectations, without caring about how she as a character responds. She never needed her parents to be a Kenobi, a Jinn, a Skywalker, whoever. They didn’t need to be somebody to the audience, they just were people she needed. Even the idea that they were drunks... They were the drunks who gave birth to her, who left her behind, and she wanted just to know why. 

And why should anyone even believe that Kylo Ren would know that they’re just nobodies when it’s been like three days since they even met - none of his informants could have chased down any leads to the point of determining this in that time, if he even WAS looking for them. So by the same measure of “how does he know this?” is the question of “why should she believe him?”

It does not explain Luke’s change of character in near enough detail - this is a character who refused to kill DARTH VADER, his father, a man he barely knew, only really knowing him as the great boogeyman of the Empire, and yet I’m supposed to believe that he would actively attempt a premeditated murder of his own nephew, who he would have known all of said nephew’s life, for what he MIGHT do? There NEEDED more of points B and C to connect points A and D here.

Also on the subject of Luke, in the last movie, it was explicit - Luke had vanished and left a map behind. Why would you leave a map to a place you intend to run away to and be forgotten and die? 

This movie, indeed, SHRANK the galaxy far, far away to ludicrous levels - the Resistance is in the fringes of the New Republic, yet Canto Bight, a major casino resort hub of war profiteering, is a casual jump away? Also, if the Resistance fleet couldn’t jump there, how can a small ship like Finn and Rose’s do that? Doesn’t the fleet need every vehicle and every drop of fuel? Rey’s gone after Luke, to a planet forgotten by the rest of the galaxy, her training pretty clearly taking place over days, at least, if not more. And yet simultaneously, the ticking clock of the Resistance’s fuel running out happens, and she still manages to arrive in the midst of their escape? This timeline is a goddam mess.

Rian Johnson explicitly said that he wanted Holdo to be flirtatious with Poe. And told the costume designer NOT to dress her in the uniform befitting an admiral. Right there, you lose me on Holdo being in the right during the mutiny - we have an existential threat to the Resistance, and she’s dressed like she’s going for drinks with Senators and apparently supposed to be flirting with Poe. 

And I’m giving this its own bullet point - they actively changed the language of the film to try and frame her as more in the right. She was redubbed after the fact to have different dialogue and tone with Poe, while leaving his side of the conversation alone, seemingly to portray him more as a hotheaded maverick when what we’re seeing is him responding to the existential threat they are facing. I HAVE to address this, because they changed what the characters are reacting to after the fact to push a narrative of Poe being wrong, when he WAS acting in the Resistance’s best interests throughout.

Because his demotion is crap - the Original Trilogy showed the X-Wings and similar snubfighters having independent hyperdrive, there was no reason to keep the fleet there for the sake of recovering them based on the text of the film and the established technology of the setting. Leia could have jumped the fleet and let them rendezvous later. Keeping the fleet there? That was her blunder, not Poe’s. 

Meanwhile the dreadnaught? That was a MAJOR target - It had over 200,000 First Order troops. For a group on the fringe, LIKE THE FIRST ORDER WAS IN TFA, that’s a major loss of personnel and material. And that slow-moving target of the dreadnaught was the kind of target those bombers should have been designed for. And if they were really so valuable that they were all lost against the dreadnaught and it was a major blow to the Resistance, those bombers should have been scrapped for parts long before. So, based on what the First Order was originally established as in TFA, Poe did the right thing. His problem is that TLJ CHANGED what the First Order was.

And, again, with the existential threat of the First Order on their tails, Poe, one of the Resistance’s best pilots AND the guy who blew up Starkiller, should have been on the list of people who deserved to be in the know of the plan - if you’re worried about traitors (which Holdo never actually SAYS), he’s pretty clearly not working for them. So she’s holding over the fact that he lost people on a mission against him, which... I’m sorry, but what the fuck with that, EVERY fighter pilot mission we have seen in the films has led to losses.

And when he does find out the plan - the plan that he asks her, three times, in private, in public, and at gunpoint, to even just tell him EXISTS, not even the details of - he’s completely accepting of it. So the whole conflict exists because she doesn’t talk to anyone about it.

Because, before anyone brings up “she has no responsibility to tell an underling her ideas,” she may not, but there was a chance, right before the mutiny went through, for her to defuse the situation entirely, since, as we see, once he knows the plan, he’s willing to go along with it. And it’s not like Poe was acting alone - there were others in the mutiny, including Connix, who we’d seen in charge of the evacuation, which gives the impression she has at least some position of authority. And she wasn’t filled in on Holdo’s plan either. 

Holdo’s flaw is assuming that, because she is the named authority - explicitly the last link in the chain of command - that all the people under her command should just fall in line. But the Resistance was, like the First Order, reverted into the Rebellion for this movie - in TFA, it was not a military service but a volunteer militia of people who were acting in service specifically of one person, Leia Organa. Not Holdo. So when the whole damn organization formed to follow one person, and that one person is taken out of commission, it NEEDS someone willing to extend trust to take charge. Poe was doing that by wanting to hear her out. Holdo was failing to do that by not even bothering.

Yoda’s appearance is undeserved - this is the same Jedi who, if he’d had his way, would have refused Luke’s training in Empire Strikes Back because he was “too old,” even though that was always the plan, to train the Skywalker child, and, as shown by the prequels, was the embodiment of the Jedi Order’s hubris back in the days of the Old Republic. If anyone deserved to have that moment with Luke, it was Anakin, because Anakin was the embodiment of where the Jedi teachings and values had failed - when your prophesized “Chosen One” ends up being at odds with almost all your expectations of the “model” Jedi, the Force is probably trying to tell you something. But no, Yoda’s the fan favorite, so Yoda appears and undermines his own message of “failure, the greatest teacher is.” Yoda’s failures had as much to do with the fall of the Jedi as anyone else’s, and when he had the chance to learn from it, he was going to pass it up.

By the end of the film, both the Resistance and the First Order are devastated. Kylo Ren is Supreme Leader of a handful of vessels with no real power base, while the Resistance fits semi-comfortably in Han Solo’s old beat up weed van. Meanwhile the New Republic is still in shambles. No one WON. All they got from victory was survival. By this point, they’re BOTH defeated, so... Where even was the story going to GO from here?

Also... That focus on the child slaves on Canto Bight at the end? Yeah, fine enough moment on its own, but... We already HAD child slaves established in this trilogy. Because Finn was taken as a child and conscripted, along with all the other stormtroopers of the First Order. So why didn’t THAT get any attention? Indeed, his infiltration of the First Order is no more than show, existing for like five minutes, rather than... y’know, trying to set up a stormtrooper rebellion, something that, by virtue of his character, should have been a running theme through the trilogy. Yet, see again, “Finn is a vestigial limb the movie can’t cut off” - we know from the DVD, he had A LOT of scenes cut and rewritten, at his character’s expense, after, again, being the leading man of the previous movie.

If this film had been a standalone film, like Rogue One or Solo, one of the Star Wars Stories films, rather than a main series film, I’d say it was a good Star Wars movie. But... As part two of a trilogy, part eight of a saga, it fails to connect to the rest of the story, and that, more than anything, is why Rise of Skywalker was what it was. If you didn’t care for Rise of Skywalker, look at what TLJ left for it in terms of connective narrative tissue, and where the story could go from there.

It might be a good film, but it was NOT a good Star Wars film. And I’m judging it as one.

[obsessively-obsessed-fangirl]

The Rise of Skywalker was the downfall of Star Wars (MAJOR spoilers)

Oh, J.J. Abrams, I had high expectations for you. I trusted you with one of my most important things...And you absolutely destroyed it. After seeing both your contributions to Star Trek and Star Wars, all I can really say is that you may know how to start a story...but you sir, do not know how to finish it and it is my own fault in believing that you could.

Yes dear reader, I have just come back from watching the final installment of the series of Star Wars movies. I have just come home feeling out of sorts because The Rise of Skywalker wasn’t necessarily the worst movie I’ve ever seen, yet it wasn’t that great nor what I expected the final installment of a Star Wars movie to be. In fact, the only way I can describe it, is just OK, and as we know from my favorite TV commercial, just OK, is not OK.

Why were Finn and Poe even in this movie?

From what I hear, the actors who play Finn and Poe tried hard to play the characters as if they were in a romantic relationship, despite Disney’s specific instructions. I would have loved this! These two characters have amazing chemistry when they are around each other, but that’s not how the story played out, and that’s not exactly why I’m so upset with them. I’m upset because despite being part of the main trio of the current installment, Finn and Poe had no growth in this final movie, and at the end of the day, I can’t really say they had TONS of character development in the series. At least within the first two movies, Finn and Poe were given their individual “tasks” and started to grow towards their final selves ...yet in the final movie, they were constantly being sidelined and overshadowed by Rey and Ben. 

One example of this is the idea that Finn is force sensitive. Now we don’t know “for sure” if this is true or not because of a scene within TROS where Finn tries to tell Rey something but never gets the chance to. Now some, especially those who remember how Finn flirted with Rey in episode VII might believe that he was planning to say that he loved her, but according to the actor who plays Finn, John Boyega, he says that Finn was planning to tell her he was force sensitive. This would have been a great plot point for Rey and Finn’s friendship, yet we never saw ANY sign of this within TROS or the other installments of the current trilogy. In fact, J.J. Abrams instead chose to continually portray Finn as almost overly concerned about Rey in TROS, like he was leaving the option open for those who ship Finn and Rey. Along with this, we were also lead to believe there could be a possible romance between him and Rose, one of the characters introduced in Episode VIII. Now I love Rose on her own, I think she is absolutely fantastic. Yet in TROS we barely saw her and she said maybe 3 lines to Finn. Why create a budding friendship/relationship between Rose and Finn, to completely sideline it in the final movie?

Now, to be quite honest, I wasn’t a huge fan of Poe within this trilogy. He is definitely one of those “know-it-all” characters who needs to be taken down a few pegs (which Leia 100% does in episode VIII). But, I don’t think it’s totally fair to Poe or the actor who plays him, to give him the beginnings of a backstory in the final movie. At some point during the film, we learn that Poe used to work on a planet and royally angered a girl. OK, great, glad to hear he is more than just a resistance pilot, but this adds nothing to the story being told in TROS, and I’ll be quite honest, I don’t remember the name of his “girl who is a friend” or even what planet they were on. All of this seemingly important character information would have served the audience a lot better if had been introduced A LOT earlier, like in the second movie when we were actually learning about his headstrong and destructive character.

Rey is a Palpatine?

So I guess the question of who is Rey’s family finally gets answered. Yet, it makes absolutely no sense and was a huge plot point that was not set up well at all. Yeah, so we find out that Rey is the granddaughter of Emperor Palpatine and everyone pretty much knew about it except for her. Also, Palpatine somehow survived and is really been the one controlling Rey and Ben, not Snoke, who was killed by Rey and Ben in Episode VIII. Now I do not know if this was J.J. Abrams plan all along, or he felt that the story needed to change after the events in Episode VIII and Rian Johnson’s vision, but bringing back Palpatine and making him the big “villain” of TROS was so underwhelming and underdeveloped. 

TROS should have focused on Rey walling herself off from Kylo Ren after the events of episode VIII. As we saw during the film, her powers and the bond between Kylo and Rey were getting stronger to the point where they could manipulate items between each other and fight with lightsabers as if they were together. This should have been a huge problem for Rey as she battles with the idea of her going to the dark side, yet instead it just became a thing between them that they could do, where they just had the same conversation over and over again. 

Rey should have just been the daughter of nobodies. They should have left her as someone who had a calling, not the granddaughter of someone who had no purpose being in this movie. TROS should have focused on Rey resisting the pull of the dark side while Kylo Ren wrecks havoc as the new supreme leader. It should have been about the Rey battling Ben and pulling him away from Kylo Ren and back to the light. Not about her defeating someone who wasn’t part of her story until now.

Ben was finally redeemed and it was done poorly:

 Like with Rey, Palpatine served no purpose in Kylo Ren’s story. The whole point of episode VIII and of killing Snoke, was to show how Kylo Ren is no longer a puppet to anyone else. He is now his own master and in charge of his own choices (that of going to the dark side). Yes, he was conditioned by Snoke to listen to his darkness, but at the end of Episode VIII, it was about him CHOOSING the dark side, and TROS should have focused on this instead of making him a puppet to someone else.

While there were some good moments for Kylo/Ben within TROS, like when he is confronted by the memory of Han Solo, it wasn’t nearly enough. Ben had no interaction with Luke and only 0.1 seconds with Leia which really hurt to watch. While her death was absolutely pointless and really made no sense, it hurts even more to see how much it impacted Ben. We saw nothing of a relationship between him and his mother in any of the episodes. They were shown to be so far away from each other, that it really made no sense to see how much her death impacted him. If you were going to do this, give her a death that matters, and at least give to us after you show some development between Ben and Leia.

I was also extremely upset at how Ben was treated after he chooses the light side. When Ben chose to throw his lightsaber into the water, that should have been his welcome home in the eyes of the Jedi who came before him. They should have been there for Ben like they were for Rey during her battle with Palpatine. Along with this. Ben should have been there helping Rey to defeat him. Showing her she wasn’t alone, not on some rocks down below forced to wait until the battle was over. When he climbed back up to Rey after the battle, the force ghosts should have been there with him, helping him to bring Rey back to life. 

As some fans have noticed, Rey and Ben’s final moments together were shot very...off. As in, it looks like the events of Ben’s death were really shot in reverse and he wasn’t supposed to die. I’ve also seen that Daisy Ridley, Rey, was recently talking about the last scene of the movie. From certain reports, it seemed as if Ben was supposed to be there with her in the final shot. According to Ridley, the ending was supposed to be emotional and “tear worthy.” Yet, the ending wasn’t even close. Which once again leads me to believe that what we saw in the theater was not the original ending and instead was some last minute change that shows how much J.J. Abrams doesn’t care for Ben or his other characters.

Final thoughts on trash:

I could go on...and on…..and on about what bothered me in this movie because there is a lot that does (LANDO’S POINTLESS PRESENCE). But, in the end it really doesn’t matter. I know deep down that whatever happened with J.J. Abrams and the team behind TROS, that it wasn’t meant to be this way. Maybe it was Disney’s fault, maybe it was J.J. Abram’s fault ...I don’t know. All I do know, is that every character and every actor that was part of  Star Wars deserved far better things from Episode IX than they got. I’m so sad this is where we ended up and I’m so sad at how we got here. And all I can do now is hopefully move on and up.

[ponett]

i was finally able to see the bad star war that everyone said was bad. as it turns out, it was bad. here’s a read more post with my thoughts on it so that i don’t spam my twitter with spoiler tweets

for a baseline: i like the original trilogy, but i don’t think any of those movies are perfect. i think the prequels had some good ideas but i were mostly terrible. i love the clone wars (both versions) and rebels. while i admit that tfa was extremely similar to a new hope, i thought it was executed great and had a wonderful new cast that showed a ton of promise. i liked rogue one, although i found its first act really sloppy. and i have some quibbles about tlj, but it had an incredibly strong vision and actual themes, and i’d consider it my favorite in the series

i’m exactly the kind of person who was always going to hate the rise of skywalker, because it’s basically a bad fanfic written by someone who didn’t like tlj and wanted to “fix” the story. like that bizarre story treatment jenny nicholson read for this movie. the bad one. it was like that

it wasn’t all bad i guess. here are the small things i liked:

some of the new environments were cool. there was cool imagery and practical effects work

i appreciated that the moon of endor where the death star wreckage was wasn’t just the one with the ewoks, and thought the vibe there was cool

zorii bliss’s armor was really cool

the image of the fleet of star destroyers all lined up was striking

i liked that the ghost showed up for the final battle

i liked that ahsoka was one of the jedi voices rey heard, even though that kind of implies that ahsoka is, uh... dead?

while extremely fucking trite and dumb, i’ll admit the closing scene on tatooine got me. yeah, rey has no real connection to this place and it’s just a nostalgic throwback, but i’m a sucker for full circle endings like that

uh. that’s about it

this movie kicks off in the middle of an action scene and just kind of keeps jumping to new setpieces nonstop until it’s over. new characters and locations get introduced and then moved past in the blink of an eye. there’s no time to let any of it sink in. it feels like abrams crammed two movies worth of shit into this one to make up for the the fact that some people didn’t like tlj, and as a result none of it resonates. i just felt so empty throughout most of the film. events were happening on screen and none of it mattered

thoughts about individual elements:

LEIA

putting the scenes with the recycled footage of carrie fisher at the beginning of the film completely took me out of it. it was so obvious that she wasn’t really responding to what was being said, and the conversations had just been built around the limited leia lines they could use

the dialogue scenes with leia felt like a space ghost interview

C-3PO

was in this movie a lot for some reason? i guess abrams wanted to make up for how little c-3po there was in the last two movies. they tried to have that emotional moment where his memory is wiped, but then they just turned his memory loss into a big joke?? and then he got most of his memories back anyway

in general, the movie is afraid to let the audience be uncomfortable for long. 3po’s memory loss. the supposed deaths of chewbacca and babu frik, that sort of thing. you’re not allowed to be sad. after tlj so effectively built tension throughout the film and really pushed the heroes to the brink, this is a disappointment

LANDO

is here because he needed to show up, and because it’s a throwback to have him pilot the falcon again. he’s just kind of there with little to do and no arc

FINN, POE, AND ROSE

before the movie came out, i had low expectations. all i really wanted was to get one last fun adventure with the new characters. when i started to hear about the spoilers, my expectations sank even lower. but maybe i would still get this

nah! rose gets like two minutes of screentime because redditors hated her, and finn and poe are barely even characters. they don’t have arcs in this film, they’re just sidekicks on rey’s journey

finn really hurts. prior to tfa’s release, finn was framed as the new star. this was, of course, a bait and switch, as rey was really the new jedi. (finn apparently IS force sensitive according to this one, but hey! we can only have one big jedi hero, so like leia before him, i guess we’ve gotta wait for some EU novel to give finn a lightsaber)

but finn was still a central character in the last two films, and he had so much potential. he was a stormtrooper who defected! that’s something new! that’s interesting! it complicates the black and white morality of the series. but no. that’s been all but abandoned at this point

many have complained about how tfa establishes that basically all the stormtroopers are people who were kidnapped as children and brainwashed by the first order... but then they still have no qualms about gleefully killing them. in the first two movies i was like “yeah, it sucks that they have to kill those guys, but if it’s to prevent genocide, it’s understandable. that’s just war. maybe they’ll touch on it in the last movie.” so in this one, they kept reminding the audience that the stormtroopers were enslaved as children. jannah is even introduced as another stormtrooper who defected like finn. but then... it goes nowhere. finn doesn’t get any first order troops to defect. they don’t care about the other stormtroopers. how many hundreds of thousands of enslaved soldiers did they kill when they blew up those star destroyers

it was nice to see finn and poe take the charge as leaders in the end, but it also feels like they didn’t take the lessons from tlj to heart. the whole point of that story was that one-in-a-million shot heroic suicide missions aren’t worth it, and that they’re more useful to the resistance alive than they are as martyrs. but then in the climax of this film they take like 30 ships to go fight a fleet of a hundred fucking star destroyers

on the subject of that final battle: i thought that the ending of tlj was so powerful. the resistance was decimated, but they still had hope, because they knew there were others out there who could help. people like rey, or the broom boy, who came from nothing but had good hearts. in this one, though, they say that apparently nobody responded to the leia’s call for help in the entire year since the last film. everyone only shows up during the climax after lando’s like “no, but for real guys, we need help”

and i did think that that sequence was cool. and i did like seeing the ghost among the ships. it was fun. the message that fascists like the first order rule by making people feel isolated, and that they’re defeated by realizing that good people are never alone? that was good. i thought that was a strong message. but it’s such a minor footnote on a movie that’s so bad in so many other ways

oh and they made the latino dude a drug dealer. okay. thanks for that

KYLO REN

i hate that they redeemed kylo and i hate the way they did it

yes, him being coerced to turn to the dark side by snoke (who was apparently just a puppet controlled by palpatine all along (UGH)) as a kid was tragic. but that doesn’t excuse his actions. kylo was given infinite second chances throughout the trilogy, and every time he responded with violence. he killed so many people himself, and willingly took part in a fascist regime that killed billions. yes, his story is sad, but he’s not some poor little boy, he’s thirty fucking years old and he vents his trauma by slaughtering innocent people

literally the entire main trio of the original trilogy died because of this asshole. han tried to talk to him in the first movie, and got stabbed and dropped into a pit. luke died astral projecting to face him in tlj. and now leia just kind of arbitrarily died to flip the switch in his brain from bad to good from across the galaxy. it’s literally as simple as that. he doesn’t have a personal journey here. he just stops being evil because his mom made him through the force

like, again. all those enslaved stormtrooper grunts who had been brainwashed since they were kids? gunned down. but giving kylo endless second chances is the most important thing in the world

and then they end the movie by having this creepy abusive stalker genocidal asshole sadboy kiss rey, retroactively framing their dynamic as a romantic one. just, gross as hell. even in this one, for most of the film, all he does is threaten rey and boss her around

i dunno. i thought the first order were interesting as antagonists. yeah, they were just the empire 2.0. but i thought it was appropriate! the idea was that just because palpatine was dead and gone didn’t mean that fascism was gone. there were still hateful people who wanted to rule the galaxy via genocide. like how we still have nazis in the 21st century. except, oops! palpatine was actually alive and pulling the strings the entire time, so now that theme’s out the window. we just have to kill him again FOR REAL this time and now the galaxy will actually be safe

people wondered where the first order would go after snoke died in tlj. but it was so obvious to me? kylo was in charge. kylo was always the most interesting bad guy. just let him call the shots and be the final adversary. but no. that wasn’t good enough. we had to bring back palpatine as the jrpg final boss to have an epic conclusion

REY

oh, poor rey. youtube critics got mad that a girl could be a strong jedi without being related to some other powerful force user from the old movies, so now she’s stuck being a palpatine forever

i will admit, the protagonist of the new movies being related to palpatine but still being a good person in spite of her heritage... that could have been something. but it’s so clearly not what they had in mind from the start, and it spits in the face of the last movie’s themes. it turns out greatness CAN’T come from anywhere. it has to come from one of these select few Special Bloodlines

oh! and this ALSO reframes rey’s parents abandoning her and selling her into slavery as an act of kindness, because they had to hide her from her spooky evil grandpa. so THAT’S fun. (edit: OH! and luke and leia knew about rey the whole time!!! and didn’t go out and look for her!!!!)

it’s just. it’s so bad what they did to rey. i don’t know if i even have much to elaborate on there, everyone’s already said how stupid it is

---

overall, i still wouldn’t say it’s the WORST star wars movie. it’s more watchable than the phantom menace, that’s for damn sure. the actors put in effort. the sets and practical effects are nice. it’s just so... empty

tros possibly feels the closest to how i imagined the new trilogy would be when it was first announced, but in a bad way. a movie built entirely on established ideas of What Star Wars Is with nothing new to bring to the table. it’s like a bad eu novel. just recycled imagery, cameos from characters we already know, palpatine coming back from the dead, that sort of thing. it’s a movie made by committee to appease reddit. it’s nothing

now i gotta use that free trial of disney plus to watch the mandalorian and wash the taste out of my mouth i guess

[supremeprince-bensolo]

Creating a story from the concept art

The leaked concept art seems to illustrate a completely different movie to the one we got. Some of it does appear to fit in with Colin Trevorrow’s leaked early draft of IX, but it seems odd that they’d do this much concept art if they’d decided not to go ahead with his story. JJ and CT allegedly started from scratch when they came on board but it’s very strange that there is barely anything related to what was actually in their movie. This whole thing makes my head hurt but, just for fun, I’m going to try to piece a story together.

It begins with the First Order heading out on a mission. We see the new Sith Troopers who are loyal to Supreme Leader Kylo Ren.

They land on Mustafar where we see Kylo Ren slice his way through Vader loyalists.

He fights his way through to the remains of Vader’s castle.

He seeks out the mysterious ‘Oracle’ for guidance as he is struggling with his role as Supreme Leader. He is also very conflicted between the Dark and Light and doesn’t know how to make sense of his feelings for Rey. This creature calls him out on his conflicted soul and his love for Rey and informs him that they are a ‘Dyad in the Force’.

Cut to Rey continuing her training. She’s repaired the broken lightsaber and fused it with her staff to create a double edged blade that can be split in two (rather than randomly introducing Leia’s saber).

Kylo tries to open up the bond so he can tell Rey what he has learnt, but she aggressively continues training and rejects his attempts to speak to her.

Instead, he goes to talk to Vader’s mask. Which then turns to ash?? It’s trying to tell him something so he follows it.

Through some means, the mask gives him a message that the answers he seeks are on Coruscant.

He heads to an old Sith Temple where he encounters a Sith Master who gives him a Sith Holocron. It has a message from Emperor Palpatine. He had a contingency plan if Vader did attempt to kill him, and it’s revealed that he’s still alive in some capacity through Vader’s mask. He is the one who has been communicating with Kylo and telling him to do things.

It also reveals there is another hidden Holocron somewhere, the other one being a Jedi Holocron. When the two of them come together a great power will be forged.

When Kylo touches the Holocron, his bond with Rey opens up and both of them see visions of Rey turning to the Dark Side.

Kylo had thought he wanted Rey to turn to the Dark Side and they could rule side by side, but what he sees horrifies him. He makes the decision to do whatever it takes to stop this vision from happening.

We also get hints that Hux is not happy with the Supreme Leader and his recklessness. It’s clear he is planning to overthrow him (with the help of General Pryde?).

Through the bond, Rey heard all about the Jedi Holocron and is determined to find it before Kylo does. She scours the Jedi texts and discovers that Pasaana might hold the key.

She says farewell to Leia, who tells her the repaired lightsaber(s) belong to her now and says something about Ben (maybe foreshadowing that he will wield one of them?). She watches them fly off in the Falcon.

Rey, Finn, Poe and co head to Pasaana. They encounter the cave where Rey heals the injured snake using her new Jedi healing abilities.

Kylo is struggling to deal with the news that he was not communicating with his grandfather, but it was Palpatine the whole time. He begins to have an identity crisis and has doubts about whether he is on the right side. He is also determined to stop the vision of Rey turning to the Dark Side from coming true. He desperately keeps trying to open the bond back up and eventually succeeds and figures out she’s on Pasaana.

He heads straight there and sends Stormtroopers (who can fly now...) to capture them.

Kylo comes after Rey personally, hoping he can capture her, but her power has gotten a lot stronger since they last fought together. Rey does the awesome backflip manoeuvre and chops one wing off his TIE whisper (the darkness is already starting to corrupt her, that’s why she’s acting very aggressive).

Kylo walks out of the wreckage unscathed.

Rey is descending into the dark while Kylo is rising to the light. They’re on parallel journeys.

They don’t end up finding what they were searching for on Pasaana, and during the whole debacle, Chewie gets captured. Rescuing him becomes their most urgent mission.

Kylo is aware that Chewie has been captured and tries to avoid having to face him. After what he did to Han, the thought of facing his fathers best friend makes him feel ill. He leaves Hux in control of their prisoner and is shocked when he is taken (against his wishes) to see the torture he is being put through. Hux knows this and is doing at as a test, seeing if Kylo will break so he can take control of the First Order. Kylo doesn’t let his true feelings show but he is very shaken by the whole thing.

Through Rey’s Jedi abilities, they find their way to the location of the Star Destroyer. Finn and Poe go off to rescue Chewie, and Rey heads to Kylo’s chambers to find the Holocron.

Kylo can sense that she is on his ship but doesn’t know where. He tries to open up the bond but she keeps resisting. He captures Finn and questions him, but then the bond opens back up and he sends everyone out of the room.

Kylo tries to have an honest conversation with Rey, but she ignites her lightsaber. He manages to tell her that they’re a ‘Dyad in the Force’. She refuses to believe him (she’s still hurt by everything that happened in TLJ), even though deep down she knows what he’s saying is true. She starts to attack and smashes something and Kylo realises she’s in his chambers.

Kylo meets her in his chambers and they have a physical duel throughout the Star Destroyer (not through the bond).

Kylo gets the upper hand but he will not finish her off. He tries to talk to her. He tires to save her from the darkness that has already begun to consume her. But then the Falcon shows up and he lets her go.

Kylo tries to open up the Holocron again, to see if there is anything else in there but comes out with nothing. He is frustrated that nothing is going right and has a temper tantrum and trashes the room. The bond opens back up and he finds Rey standing there with her lightsaber ignited.

She sees the Holocron and rushes to take it (as matter can now pass through the bond). The Holocron opens and they both see the message that reveals the location of the second one. The bond is severed and Rey rushes off to Kef Bir to the wreckage of the second Death Star alone.

She swims underwater and encounters Kylo. Both of them want the Jedi Holocron and a fight ensues.

They have their epic lightsaber duel on the wreckage of the Death Star as the waves crash down around them.

A dark force has really taken hold of Rey and she overpowers Kylo and gets him on the ground. Much like in the movie, he’s distracted and while he’s unarmed Rey stabs him with his own lightsaber.

She comes to her senses and heals him. Kylo Ren symbolically dies and Ben Solo is reborn. Rey leaves him and takes the Jedi Holocron. She is unable to access it though, because it can only be opened by a Jedi and she is being influenced by dark forces.

Ben is alone on the Death Star and is visited by the memory of his father. Much like in the movie, this is the real turning point for him. His mother calling out to him, making peace with his father and wanting to save Rey, all of that is what pushes him back to the light.

There is absolutely no mention of Palpatine in the art book so I don’t think he was originally meant to be the big bad. The climactic battle was supposed to be the First Order vs the Resistance.

With Kylo gone, Hux is now Supreme Leader of the First Order and controls the Sith Troopers. They launch a huge space attack on the Resistance.

The Resistance fight back hard. Maybe Finn (and Rose?) lead a Stormtrooper rebellion. This is the huge climactic moment of the movie where the stakes are very high.

During the big battle, Ben and Rey come face to face. Rey has almost completely lost herself to the Dark Side. She looks something like this.

They fight, Ben desperately trying not to harm her and bring her back to the light. She has both of the lightsabers and during the duel, Ben gets one and they clash them together. They’re equally matched.

Two halves of one lightsaber, just as they are two halves of one soul, and the Holocron’s are two halves of one fusion. Three different visual representations of two halves coming together as one.

As their Force Dyad is a power like life itself, when they come together a huge wave of power overcomes them and everyone in the space battle.

The surge of Force energy ends the war and brings balance to the Force.

Ben and Rey are both knocked out, but Ben is still conscious due to Leia holding on and giving him the remainder of her life force.

Ben heals Rey, repaying the favour from earlier. They accept that they both have dark and light inside them and that’s okay. Things happen much like in the movie. They kiss, then Ben dies and fades away.

Rey heads back to the Resistance base where her friends are a little wary of her after she wasn’t acting like herself when the darkness was influencing her. Everyone reunites and celebrates the victory.

Rey exiles herself to Ahch-To. She feels guilt for letting the darkness get to her and blames herself for Ben’s death. She buries the two halves of the repaired lightsaber there, as the home of the first Jedi Temple is a fitting place for them to be laid to rest. She burns Kylo’s TIE whisper as a funeral for Ben.

She is then called to the cave just as she was in TLJ. She falls into the water and comes to the mirrors. There is a strange sense of déjà vu as almost the exact thing that happened last time happens again.

As the shadowed figure approaches her, it cuts to Ben in the World Between Worlds. He senses her and begins walking towards the rays of light.

Cut back to Rey’s point of view as Ben appears on the other side of the mirror. They’re so close yet they cannot get to each other.

Rey keeps repeating ‘be with me’ and the fallen Jedi appear to her. They help her bring Ben back into the world of the living.

The movie ends with a time jump where we see Ben and Rey training the next generation of Force users as Gray Jedi. Ben with facial hair, and Rey possibly in this cream coloured outfit, which could symbolise the balance she’s found within herself.

As the theme of the movie and the saga as a whole is BALANCE, the ending shows how dark and light coming together and meeting in the middle is how the galaxy has finally found…

STAR PEACE.

[demigodsanswer]

Do you have any headcanons about Chris to go along with those last ones of Clarisse? How did he recover after TLO?

In the three weeks that Clarisse is not at camp following the war, rumors and conspiracy theories about his knowledge and involvement with Silena begin to circulate. 

People hypothesized that he was also a spy, and that they were working together. That Clarisse knew the whole time, and was either also on their side, or chose not to sell them out. Or that she was being manipulated by both of them in order for them to stay on camp’s good side. That Clarisse had left camp after the war either to escape retribution for war crime or to escape humiliation at being played. 

None of these were true, and Chris had told camp everything he knew about Luke’s army. 

Recovering from TLO was actually, in many ways, easier than recovering from TBotL, even though he hadn’t fought in the battle of the Labyrinth. He was healed soon after the battle ended, only to learn that Clarisse had spent a year trying to heal him out of sheer kindness, and two of his best friends had been killed as a direct result of a successful iteration of the mission he had been sent on. 

He blames himself much more for Castor and Lee’s deaths. While losing Beckendorf and Silena was not easy for him, he did not hold himself culpable in their deaths, really, in the same way that Clarisse blamed herself for Silena’s death and Silena had blamed herself for Beck’s death. 

He does grapple with these questions of heroism that Clarisse deals with, but, for him (as he was never someone who really desired traditional hero things anyway), a lot of that grappling is more centered on how to move on past these events (not so much how do I reform my identity after all of this, which is much more what the question is for Clarisse.) 

Ultimately, the three of them (him, Clarisse, and Pollux) realize that all they can do is step away from that life as much as they can. They can’t move on from these traumas and still try and achieve heroism. Clarisse tried pretty much constantly between the Sea of Monsters and the Battle of Manhattan, and it only got her more and more hurt. Their only choices were to keep fighting until they achieved some kind of glory in death (not what they want) or to separate themselves from that life as much as they can, resulting in a change from wanting their life to be full of glory to wanting their life to be long. 

As someone who had never really cared for glory and had never been a particularly strong demigod, it’s not hard for Chris to make this change in himself, but it is very hard for him to see Clarisse go through it. At first he thinks it just empathy - his partner is struggling emotionally, and he doesn’t know how to help - but he soon realizes that it seems to be deeper than that. 

It isn’t until years later when he sees The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi that he actually understands why that was hard. 

Chris pretty much created an instant attachment to Finn as a character - he was a character who was fighting for a side that didn’t care much for the humanity of their soldiers or the people who they fought. Finn rejects that dehumanizing and proves to be instantly affected by his friend dying in front of him (separate headcanon, but Chris does end up getting the storm trooper helmet with the bloody hand print tattooed on his shoulder). Even though he leaves the First Order, though, he does not have any initial interest in joining the Resistance. 

The Titan Army and their recruitment of demigods certainly had a little more complexity behind it than the Star Wars n*zi allegory, but the Titan army did prove not to care about the demigods they killed on either side. The fact that they left Chris to die in the labyrinth without care is proof of that. The fact that they actively killed demigods on the god’s side was proof of that. Still, the gods didn’t care for them much either. When Chris was healed, he still had a pretty ambivalent stance towards the war as a whole. 

I’ve written this before, but essentially, he told Clarisse that he isn’t fighting for the Titans or the Gods, but he’s fighting for her. 

Over the year before the war, though, that starts to change. Her passion, care, and bravery really begin to inspire loyalty in him. Not to the gods, but to the other demigods. He starts to lose that sense of selfishness, and instead develops (or redevelops) an intense empathy and love for camp and the demigods (on both sides). 

This is why he spends so much time trying to talk her out of her choice to not join the war. Because it was her in the first place who had dragged his selfish ass kicking and screaming out of faux-neutrality and into actually caring about other demigods. 

She had even called him on this a few months before the war: “You can’t really be neutral in this, you know. you said you left the Titan army because you didn’t think they actually cared about the demigods they recruited, they just capitalized on their sadness. But there are demigods in that army still and in this one who are going to be killed soon. Are you really going to pretend like you defected out of a sense of obligation to all of them, but then turn around it not care about any demigods except the one who saved your ass?” 

Clarisse was the one who inspired disloyalty in the Titans, but also loyalty to, if not the gods, then at least to camp. (”That’s how we’re going to win. Not by killing what we hate, but saving what we love” /// “There is some good in this world, Mr. Frodo, and it’s worth fighting for.) 

So seeing her switch from that to someone burnt out and tired of it all was really hard. So much of what he had loved about her was her passion and bravery, and the ways in which those qualities had changed him. Seeing her lose those qualities (that coupled with him no longer being at camp) did put stress on their relationship. 

Although he’d always say that the half-year where they were broken up was one of the worst times of his life, he does, in hindsight, think it was a good thing. In those months without he, he was able to work on himself and grow as an individual, and realize that he had been imagining her as more than a person. She wasn’t Clarisse, my girlfriend, a person with these good and bad traits. She had become a symbol for something so much bigger than herself that she could never maintain. 

If they had tried to stay together when there was even more distance between them, their relationship likely would have exploded and never recovered. Instead, though, they are able to grow apart for a while, and come back together much stronger. 

(all that being said, though, his favorite Star Wars characters are still Finn and Rose [and Poe], and, gun to his head, he will tell you his favorite movie is The Force Awakens. But do not ask him about his thoughts on The Rise of Skywalker or the trilogy as a whole unless you are prepared for a very long, very nerdy conversation.) 

[pretendwiseguysofficial]

MBTI: Finn (Star Wars) - ENFP, 2w3

MBTI: Finn (Star Wars) - ENFP, 2w3

Written by Ryan (archive post from December 30, 2017)

Ooga Booga! Now have I got your attention? Welcome to the first ever post. I’ll be discussing MBTI today. More specifically Star Wars. More specifically, Finn. More specifically, y’all just can’t seem to get it right on what type this guy is. No fear though, for we’re going to take a crack on this.

First off, several people on the internet have differing opinions on which type Finn may be, and it’s understandable because these are new movies coming out, with different writers and the potential for personalities to change to service the plot. It’s happened before, and it will happen again, especially in a corporatized movie franchise. But I believe Finn’s type to remain one and the same in both movies that have been released so far, so here we go: ENFP.

“Nah, he’s ISFJ.”

Nah, I believe you’re wrong. Here’s why: *SPOILERS* This was a bit of a tough one to decided between: ESFP or ENFP. But ultimately it made more sense that he led with Ne instead of Se, for these traits of his: - Making interjectory side comments (there was one moment in The Last Jedi, can’t remember the exact words) - Being adept at creatively putting a spin on his situation by telling lies on the fly (i.e. lying to Rey about being resistance when he wasn’t, smoothly keeping up the facade through interactions with BB8. Also, lying to Rose about “inspecting the escape pods when he was trying to escape)

“Guess no one ever told me I had circuits, since I’m the new comic relief and all…”

If he led with Se, he would seem more like an adrenaline junkie, like Poe Dameron (clearly a Se user, but that’s another topic). But he’s distracted by the possibilities of future danger. Such as, most importantly, the whereabouts and condition of his unrequited lady-crush slash friend, Rey (who knows what the dynamic is and what it will become). And the constant defeatism that comes as a common trait of most idealists; he’s seen it all , and he’s had it. With this “defeatism” in particular moments, his inferior function of Si combined with Te flares up in these unhealthy moments, more specifically in The Force Awakens, when his experiences as a Stormtrooper convinced him that there’s not really a lot of hope when it comes to dealing with an organization that powerful.

Moving forward, Fi is the name of the Auxiliary game. I’m pretty sure most of the internet is in agreement when it comes to this. Deserting the First Order because “it’s the right thing to do?” Does this guy not have an internal compass?

More specifically, a nail-in-the-coffin moment comes when he’s fighting Phasma: The “rebel scum” one-liner. An Idealist would say this more than an Artisan. Because, him saying it seemed like he said it due to the thrill of being a part of a larger cause, which is DEAD-ON perceiving Idealist. An Artisan gets a rush from the action, while an Idealist gets a rush from the cause. It’s this primary difference that separates the usage of the Fi (or Ti, if you are a thinking type Artisan) in this situation. I could go on and mention other examples of clear-cut Fi (such as almost sacrificing himself at the end of the second film), but I figure that this function doesn’t really need much explaining behind its assignment. ENFPs (and non-hardened ENTPs) are infamously easy to type because of a purported childlike aura they possess. They just exude it. They could walk up to any stranger and initiate conversation if it feels like a sunny day in their mind’s eye. Provided Finn hadn’t lived his whole life as a tool for an evil organization, the metaphorical clouds in his dome (that isn’t chrome) would be lifted on most occasions and we would see enthusiasm. We get a hint of it in The Force Awakens moreso than The Last Jedi, after he meets Rey. As well as larger causes, ENFPs are stimulated by people they find interesting, and boy, does Finn find Rey interesting *hormones sizzle*. Ne-doms and secondary users are also often caught awestruck by unfamiliarity and things that seem alien. One final piece of evidence (that I can remember) is that Finn is completely enthralled by the casino on Canto Bight when he and Rose walk in there. Just as the audience is (”The Last Jedi Sucks! That scene wasn’t the Star Wars I know!”). Next time you see the film, just take a look at the way his face lights up like a match in that scene. A Se user would more likely be enthralled by the gambling and the experience, but a Ne user would be enthralled by the environment and the aesthetics. And Finn doesn’t seem like a gambler. I’d say that the movies now have a pretty bonafide representation of an ENFP now (aside from Quin-Gon Jinn, which is a more complex portrayal IMO).

I attached my predicted Enneagram typing for Finn above, which would be a 2w3. If you want to know more about the meaning, check out this post https://thoughtcatalog.com/heidi-priebe/2016/01/mbti-and-the-enneagram-2/17/

[knifesxedge]

you really are about to unlock smth bc a) i have SO many thoughts on the sequel trilogy and b) im DESPERATE for a distraction so um. i think about the prequel trilogy and i really truly start to lose it. bc force awakens was SO GOOD. like remember the first time you watched it and you (me, but maybe you as well) were like? HOLY SHIT. it was obviously a new hope v2 but it was FRESH and NEW and there were cool characters that i CARED about. (1/3)

HELL YEAH let’s get into it ok ok ok OPINIONS INCOMING.

TOTALLY with u on this. like the prequels make me mad about the wasted potential but tbh the sequel trilogy is just like. draining emotionally because they LOOK so fucking good. the force awakens WAS so so good, like very very star wars even if it was following the plot beats of anh. and then it just. tanked itself holy shit. like at least the prequels look bad, sound bad, it’s like a comical level of tragic. the sequel trilogy feels like having chalk dust spread all over my skin and then being put in an echo chamber of nails on a chalkboard 😔 at this point even tfa comes with a TINY lil bit of like 😞 just because i know what comes after but YES tfa is one of those star wars movies that just FEELS so fucking star wars it makes me unhinged. “THATS ONE HELL OF A PILOT” YEAH BITCH!!! IT IS!!!!! GAY PEOPLE!!!

the last jedi. a mess. i like certain rian johnson films but he should not be allowed to be anywhere near Star Wars. my main problem? (beyond the racism and romanticizing stalking and emotional and physical abuse?) it doesn’t FEEL like star wars. like. ok even in the darkest moments in mainstream star wars films they are SUPPOSED to feel hopeful. tlj feels like watching a train wreck in slow motion it’s just like shitty thing after shitty thing after shitty thing happening to the main cast. i think the casino planet’s design was a little lazy and WAY too underlit and rose’s character was pointless in the way she was shown in the movie. exhausting. the jokes were all on the wrong edge of disrespectful to the characters and the original star wars like luke tossing the lightsaber over his shoulder? appalling. not funny just there for shock value. everyone is out of character. everyone is stressed and miserable all the time. aside from things i didn’t really want to see but wouldn’t have argued with in a better movie (ie luke dying) it really was just a racist misogynistic mess. oh yeah did i mention how they did rey’s character dirty because she went from being a scrappy desert mechanic who’s a little dorky and just trying to find a family and a place in the galaxy to Bland White Girl Servicing a Man’s Character. that pales in comparison to how finn poe and rose’s characters were treated but HOLY shit. i walked out of the theater crying. tfa raised my expectations only to have tlj smash them down to the floor it was. hhhhh ok ok ok im trying to think if i liked anything from the movie. um. you were right it looked good! sound and score were great as usual. i did think poe’s conversation with hux at the beginning was funny. i really liked when leia used the force to come back to the ship (ik that was a controversial scene for some people but i did really like that scene. she deserves it). laura dern is cool i hated her character but in theory laura dern being leia’s lesbian boarding school friend is neat. but yeah im sorry i really REALLY didn’t like that movie we only saw it in theaters once it was so bad. :( i do agree with u abt the force mysticism being cool tho!

rise of skywalker. now maybe it’s because the bar was on the floor after tlj. but i actually liked it quite a bit. still kind of a mess. jj trying to retcon all of the stuff from the last movie because for some reason he wasn’t just allowed to do the whole trilogy. the pacing being a nightmare for the first half. the atrocious abuser-validating kiss at the end. but im gonna be real after having to sit through tlj i was happy enough just to see the main trio back together and finn and poe being treated with more respect to care much about that stuff. disney queerbaits me once again but that’s on me for clowning. i really genuinely liked the scene where rey passes the lightsaber to kylo i thought that was cool but it was overshadowed by the knowledge that the Kiss 🤮 was coming so i didn’t get to enjoy it like i wanted. ALSO hayden christiansen and all the other actors doing the voices in the scene where rey is fighting the emperor (who im pretty sure was only in there because RIAN put the trilogy’s intended big bad into a sparkly gold bathrobe and killed him off in the second movie but im not complaining about seeing ian mcdiarmid) were apparently on set in costume and force ghosts were supposed to protect her in like a big circle and what im saying is i feel robbed and cheated and feral

the only movie of the three i REALLY liked was tfa. now we’re back to How Would I Fix It. step one fire rian johnson. step two put JJ on the whole trilogy and HOLD HIM ACCOUNTABLE for having a plot planned out, or else get a different director TO DO ALL THREE MOVIES. none of this middle of the road “trying to appease both sides of the fandom” bullshit. kylo dies at the end and they DO NOT kiss and that is all the redemption he gets. if disney is claiming gay rep then they SHOW us ACTUAL gay representation. poe and finn kiss on screen and we don’t get a two second blurry background kiss between random characters. completely toss out whatever the fuck that plot was supposed to be in tlj and separate ros into two movies so JJ could actually DO the entire plot he had planned (instead of disney execs chopping down what was p much a four hour movie into two hours twenty two minutes which was SHORTER than the two hour forty minute cut jj reluctantly okayed but i DIGRESS).

god. what the fuck. anyways sorry for completely going off the rails but ty for sharing ur sequel trilogy opinions and ty for letting me rant sorry this got so long but ily!!! ❣️💕💝