#PhD dissertation acknowledgement

[emilywatson-01]

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[beaft]

i'm curious what you didn't like about the Sociopath memoir? it's been on my to-read from the library for ages out of curiosity, but now i'm having second thoughts

i would not say i hated it, but i definitely had a lot of reservations, and from checking out the goodreads reviews i can see that other people feel similarly. this is a really long response (i got carried away, sorry!), so i'm putting it under a cut.

the good:

it's very readable - i finished it in the span of two train journeys. i can't remember ever having read a book - or even an article - that examines sociopathy/ASPD in a positive or even neutral light. like NPD, it's stigmatised to such an extreme degree that most people think it just means "serial killer" or "person who is inherently evil with no hope of redemption". patric gagne describes it as more of an emotional learning disability, and compares her compulsions to do "bad things" to OCD - that same feeling of an anxiety-inducing pressure building up until the compulsion is performed.

i found that a really interesting description - it definitely made me re-examine a few biases that i didn't even realise i had. she also mentions that she lucked out by being born a rich cishet white woman, which makes her more sympathetic in the eyes of the public and gives her access to opportunities that she wouldn't have if she was from a different socioeconomic background. the fact that she was aware of that and acknowledged it made me respect her more, although that's admittedly a low bar.

as for the bad:

gagne claims to be a therapist with a PhD in applied psychology, so i was hoping for some clinical insights - research history, studies, citations, differences in presentation between demographics, discussion of environmental and neurological factors, criticisms of the DSM, comparisons to other disorders like NPD and BPD, and so on. but there was almost none of that - which seemed odd to me, given her educational and professional background.

after looking her up, i discovered that she openly admits to not being a licensed psychologist, and there seems to be a lot of debate about whether she has a PhD at all. her degree is not from an accredited university, no one can find any evidence of her scholarship or her dissertation, she comes from a very wealthy background and apparently "bought" a lot of publicity for this memoir, and a lot of the details she provides (dates, locations) simply don't add up. even if you take everything at face value, her claim to have been "diagnosed" with sociopathy is misleading. what actually happened is that she spoke with a therapist who thought she might have it, based on the results of a quiz she took.

"sociopath" is not in the DSM, and nor is "psychopath". nowadays they both fall under the label of ASPD - antisocial personality disorder. gagne knows this, but rejects the ASPD label because she doesn't fit all the criteria, even though she doesn't really fit the (outdated) criteria for sociopathy either. she loves her family and her childhood pet, she is able to maintain healthy long-term relationships, and her "destructive urges" are never that destructive (she steals, but then returns the things she stole; she breaks into houses, but only if they're abandoned). the worst thing she ever does is grab a cat and squeeze it until it's in pain - but then she lets the cat go, because she realises she doesn't actually want to hurt it. she might not consciously feel remorse, but she also does not want to harm people or animals. she has a moral compass, understands the difference between right and wrong, and expresses a passionate desire to help people. like gagne, i am not a licensed psychologist, but this just doesn't read like sociopathy to me.

if i was to armchair-diagnose (god forbid!), her descriptions of her childhood read a lot more like autism than sociopathy. masking heavily in an attempt to blend in, getting easily over- and under-stimulated, alexithymia (knowing she's feeling an emotion but being unable to name it), being extremely literal, not understanding social rules or cues... she does have some antisocial behaviours, but most of them seem to stem from being an angry and isolated child with no real support system. the fact that she proudly calls herself a "sociopath" - a culturally loaded and sensationalised term - despite not having a formal diagnosis and also not really fitting the criteria just didn't sit right with me. a lot of the time it felt like she was going for shock factor, but since her behaviour wasn't shocking enough to warrant that reaction, it ended up falling pretty flat for me.

as a memoir of low-empathy neurodivergence, it's fine. but it is not a book about sociopathy. don't go in expecting in-depth criticism or analysis because you will not get it

[ragana62]

Sending 🔥🔥🔥

"Bad" fan content (art, fics, videos, rambles, etc.) is actually more important to fandom and a better indication of the health of a fandom than the professional grade internet darling stuff.

More below the break, because I got longwinded and don't want to wall of text people who don't want to read my takes.

First of all, purity culture is bullshit. Liking and engaging with only the most popular/top tier in terms of 'quality' (used here in the strictest technical sense, i.e. perfect adherence to grammatical rules and formatting guides for fics, a high degree of technical skill in drawing/painting/whatever your artistic medium, a borderline PhD dissertation level of lit analysis going into each and every headcanon) is the same as deciding you can't rewatch your favorite movie/reread your favorite book from middle school because you're an adult now and can only like mature things, is the same as deciding that you can't like certain ships because they aren't canon compliant. And it all comes down to this need we've all developed to curate our lives perfectly to present ourselves as the best and most perfect people to ever exist on the internet. Which is also bullshit.

Fandom is and always was a deeply nerdy, cringe space at its very best. It was where you could subtly ask people at a con if they watch Star Trek for 'the Premise' and once confirmed they were safe launch into your hottest Spirk takes, or where you can scroll past someone's New York Times Bestseller quality 400,000 word magnum opus on the complex inner life of a character with no spoken lines of dialogue in canon in the same mouse drag as a 400 word crack fic about the main character in a fandom centered on a horrific dystopia going to the beach. So not only does the closet cosplayer who looks more like your local emo 7-11 clerk than the character they're tagged as belong here just as much as the professional costumer who hand wove the cloth for their undershirt out of flax they grew themselves in their back garden, but I think they're actually more important to a healthy fandom. First, a brief defense of cringe:

We all suck at some point. Maybe you (general) didn't start posting anything until you could do it perfectly, but that doesn't mean you emerged from the womb flawlessly gifted at writing complex worldbuilding and painting masterpieces. That just means you didn't show anyone until you could, and that's kind of sad. Writing/making art/doing textual analysis/making gifs or song edits/costuming/any of it, all of it takes practice to be any good at it, and while none of it is 100% guaranteed to be a good time had by all involved, if you weren't having some fun along the way why bother? You shouldn't have to feel like you need to wait to be perfect to be excited and show people what you're doing just because curation culture says it's only worthy if it's perfect.

We are all inherently cringe. You didn't stop being cringe when you pulled out the cheap neon clip in hair extensions from Claire's and start saying that your favorite cartoon was for babies, you just became a different sort of cringe. That's fine, it's a right of passage, we all go through that phase, but part of growing as a person is learning that it's okay to like what you like, to embrace all the parts of you and your passions, whether it's the big mature official adult interests that people can understand and are socially accepted like prestige TV and whatever self-help book is telling you all the ways you should feel miserable today or the silly youtube videos that made you laugh in middle school or the cheesiest pop songs imaginable. It isn't morally superior to only acknowledge your love for the former, or an essential part of growing up.

Fandom has also always been middle aged suburban moms rambling about the two characters they want to shove into a closet and make kiss, just as much as it has always been the middle schoolers doing the exact same thing, just as much as it has always been people spending hours researching every detail of the latest episode to perfectly justify why Character X is actually a closet fan of doritos. There is nothing wrong with wanting to do a massive formal analysis on the magic systems present in the world of whatever and how they have to work in relation to real world physics, or explore serious themes in a work of fiction, or whatever else either. One set of those things isn't any inherently better than the other, and we all do both when we are being honest with ourselves, even if we don't share one (and more often than not it's the former). Learning fictional languages is an inherently dorky thing to do, no matter how many awards the show or book it's from wins. Dressing up as your favorite imaginary friend is an inherently dorky thing to do, no matter how perfect the costume is. Writing about a made up person going on adventures is an inherently dorky thing to do, whether it's grimdark serious or the crackiest AU imaginable. Spending hours getting the shading just right on the book not the show version of your favorite character is inherently dorky, even if you're the Michaelangelo of old man Yaoi (as though Michaelangelo himself wouldn't rise from the grave to fight you on that). Embrace it.

Anyway, why does this matter? Because purity culture and curation culture are actually what's killing fandom. Like I ramble about the death of community in fandom, the death of comment culture, the loss of old fandom rules/etiquette, etc., fandoms dying too quickly, all the time, but those are symptoms. The bigger problem is, we've all convinced ourselves that we have to be perfect on the internet.

A breakdown:

Fandoms die too quickly. - Because we don't nurture them. Sure, dwindling attention spans do contribute, but we don't give fandoms (or shows, but that's a different rant) time to get good anymore. If we are all refusing point blank to interact with any fanworks that aren't complete works, at the highest quality, that are already popular/have certain ratios of hits to kudos to comments, or aren't at a certain word count, then we're killing it before it starts. Like it or not, by the highest standards we hold this stuff to, 90% of just about everything is a bit shit. It's going to be bad grammar and unfinished wips and 'cringe' AUs and self-insert whathaveyou. That's fandom baby. And if that 90% has no interaction, you can bet those wips will never be finished and those fics with good ideas and bad formatting will never bother to edit it or find a beta and you'll never know that the author writing that 'cringe' was sitting on a draft of your perfect fic that scratches every itch your brain has ever had for your OTP. Because we can sit here all we like and say we write/draw/create for ourselves, but we all know we publish it because we want to exist in interaction with others.

Nobody comments/interacts anymore. - Yeah, because we're all a little bit afraid of someone seeing our AO3 username popping up in the comments/kudos and being found out for enjoying that deeply self-indulgent smut fic or the random 'murder hobo left the child death arena to get froyo' fluff stick figure comic or whatever else we're so afraid of somehow being called out for liking. We've all had it drilled into us that every moment of our existence on the internet has to be curated perfectly to match our official image, so if we want to be serious and mature and proper we can't be seen enjoying the same 'cringe' as everyone else. But if we all feel it, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy where nobody interacts with any of it, and it all just goes away because as much as we liked it, the creators never found out and stopped sharing with the class.

Fandom etiquette is dead. - Purity culture and curation culture strike again. In the olden times, we had a little policy called 'Don't Yuck My Yum' (it does have other names, this is just the one I use, though 'Don't Like, Don't Read' is the more fic specific one). That isn't to say there was never negativity and flame wars and the like, because oh boy was there, but the point stands. Demanding updates like clockwork because you want more? Anon hate because an author writes a ship you don't like/engages with clearly tagged subject matter that isn't for you/doesn't write a character how you see them? They come from the same place. We need everything we interact with to match our perfectly curated internet persona, and part of that is being seen defending that perfectly curated internet persona's rules. So none of your mutuals can possibly disagree on your headcanons, and nobody can ship anyone else with the members of your officially stated OTP, and nobody can ever find out that you liked that one Dead Dove fic when all your bookmarks are the fluffiest of fluff, and inversely, your favorite author must be a bad person if they wrote a dark fic, or isn't doing fandom right if they don't have a firm update schedule or only publish once the work is fully complete, etc. etc. That's not how any of that actually works in the real world. Why would it be how it works in fandom?

Death of community in fandom. - No shit. Given everything above, why would you bother building that community? Why would you become a regular commenter on a wip you like if it's probably just going to be abandoned anyway and your inbox will be flooded with people telling you that one time at 5:02 PM Pacific Standard Time on August 27th, a fan artist who did the cover for the fic you just commented on once said that they don't like relish on hot dogs and are therefore evil incarnate? Why would you risk putting yourself out there with your craziest takes that have no support but are pure vibes if you're just going to get 'well actually'-ed out of your entire online presence because you had the audacity to say 'fuck it, this is just for fun, I don't care if it's a bit out of character or unsupported by canon'? Why would you bother publishing your art/videos/gifs/fics/whatever else until they were so perfect they couldn't possibly be critiqued at all? The answer is, you wouldn't. So, nobody talks to anybody, unless you've known them for years already before everything got so closed off and perfectionistic, nobody builds those communities, fandom disappears off to little insular discord servers where the creators never find out anyone cares and only people with your exact same takes are let in, and it all slowly goes away because eventually people stop investing their time in putting themselves out there to receive none of the positive interaction and all of the negative.

In short: perfect is the enemy of good, and the best thing your creativity can be is 'in existence'. Make the 'bad' thing and share it, not because anyone else will necessarily love it right away but because it deserves to exist. Maybe one day it gets better. Maybe it never does. Either way, it exists. Inversely, show love to the 'bad' things, because fuck it we all enjoy these things anyway in our own ways so why be ashamed of it? Watch your 'childish' cartoon and rant about it on main, publish the crack AU 'Evil Dictator Spends 20 Minutes Wondering How You Milk an Almond on Their First Grocery Store Trip in 25 Years', draw the stick figure comic and the jerky animation for your fan music video set to the schlockiest pop song imaginable. The only reason we aren't all doing it, is because we're all stuck in these little shame bubbles that can only be popped if we start poking at them. And that's how you save fandom.

Because healthy fandoms, they have lots of 'cringe'. They have lots of 'bad' art and fics and gifs and videos, because they've been around long enough for people to start off bad and get better in a technical sense, or because they haven't lost that community spirit and willingness to admit they're inherently dorky that makes fandom great and have no shame in admitting they read the reader insert smut or the crack drabbles or the badly formatted and unedited fic that might not consistently be able to spell 'orange' correctly but damn it if the story isn't good. Sometimes both. Usually both. If we want to actually fix the issues we all rant about all the time in fandom, we need to start by embracing the fact that we are all doing fundamentally dorky, cringey, things by engaging with fandom at all and there is no inherent moral or personal superiority to be had in acting otherwise.

If we're all irredeemable dorks with questionable taste, then who gives a shit that you saw the author of that fandom darling masterpiece of high-grade wordsmithery's name pop up in the kudos or comment section of that smutfic or darkfic or crackfic or whatever else we're ashamed to admit we read this week? You're both there, you're both reading it, if anything, that's an endorsement that you'll probably enjoy what they're doing since you're both enjoying the same other stuff. If none of us are perfect, maybe we can finally get back to just letting ourselves have fun.

Send me 🔥

[easays]

I'm getting a PhD, and last week, I was finishing my dissertation prospectus draft. A prospectus is essentially a proposal of my topic with details for why and a very long bibliography to show I know my field (which is 18th/19th c lit and queer-trans-crip theory). I listened to Aabria Iyengar's playlist for Suvi in Worlds Beyond Number (available on the Patreon!), and truly, I think it filled my fingers with wizard magic. Why?

Reader, I passed with *no revisions* on my *first draft*. My committee said "we have no notes, this is amazing, you may proceed." WBN and Aabria specifically will be getting a shout out in my dissertation acknowledgments.

[lazysublimeengineer]

Well, damn ig Isagi is really committed in making that dissertation for Phd degree in psychology based on his opponents' despair?

Just kidding.

A lot of people has been surprise at the extreme lengths that Isagi will go through to achieve his goal as a player inside the field.

But.

It wasn't really surprising.

Isagi had always displayed amoral stances when he is in that "mode" and got that single minded focus on scoring a goal against the opponents. He'll employ every strategy he has to win against the opponent.

He's good at reading and adapting to a person's mindset and that's why he is "evolving" at a faster rate compared to the other characters in the franchise.

Isagi substituting himself as "Sae" in Rin's eyes to manipulate his actions and performance in the field to stop him from going full throttle in Berserker mode is the thing I can see him doing because he already saw him going like that during the U20 arc and will exploit that weakness against him as an opponent because he saw an opportunity to do so.

I've actually read a fic by a Vietnamese writer in AO3 titled, "Parasite" which had a premise like this but in a more shippy, toxic way since it focuses more on the relationship between the two outside of the field. Isagi is "acting like Sae" in front of Rin "to fulfill those unfulfilled fantasies" of his like being acknowledged and such.

It's one of the few Rinsagi fics that I actually subscribed into because I'm not that crazy over that ship but if there's an accurate, toxic description of that ship, it's that fic written by that author because it's really in character and very intriguing concept. Also, it's clever that it now coincides with the canon event in this recent chapter which makes me think that this author has a good grasp of the characters of this franchise.

[readingsby-valentina]

Harry's time of birth is my Da Vinci Code, I say this jokingly but not so jokingly lol. I know this has been a topic that jumps on here from time to time and sometimes I myself have made suggestions. I try to use both tropical and sidereal astrology/nakshatras to try and pinpoint what fits best and I think I'm close. I am convinced this man is not a libra rising, it does not fit him at all. I do think he may be taurus rising like you've predicted, but sidereal taurus and tropical Gemini rising. Here's my PHD dissertation lol:

Instead of 12:06 am that all major Astrology sites have https://www.astrotheme.com/astrology/Harry_Styles , what if it was 12:06 pm instead? That would make him a:

Tropical Zodiac (WHOLE SIGN HOUSES): Aquarius Sun (2nd Decan - Ruled by Gemini / Mercury) Libra Moon (2nd Decan - Ruled by Aquarius / Uranus) Gemini Rising - (2nd Decan - Ruled by Libra / Venus) Pisces Mercury - (1st Decan, Ruled by Pisces / Neptune) Aquarius Venus - (2nd Decan, Ruled by Gemini / Mercury) Aquarius Mars - (2nd Decan, Ruled by Gemini / Mercury) Aquarius Midheaven (1st Decan - Ruled by Aquarius / Uranus)

Notables - If we use 12:06pm birth time, his Aquarius sun, venus, mc, and mars would sit in the 9th house, his Libra moon would sit in the 5th house, and his pisces mercury sit in the 10th house. I won't go into further details beyond that just to not write too much, there are many resources that talk about the relationships of each planet with each house).

Transits (Tropical / Whole Sign): if we use 12:06pm birth time, that will mean he is going through a 7H profection year, and his 7H is ruled by Jupiter / Sagittarius. Jupiter has been transiting through his 1H since May 2024, and will stay there until June 2025. He possibly broke up with Taylor in May 2024, when Jupiter began it's journey into Gemini. Prior to being in his 1h, Jupiter was moving through his 12h from May 2023 for about a year. He possibly began his relationship with Taylor around June 2023. This isn't to try and make any conclusions against Taylor, it's to highlight the possibility that this relationship/connection was important for Harry to acknowledge his subconscious shadows, if he was running from them before. Shadows could be personal insecurities, jealousy, fears, anxieties, etc. This doesn't make this a meaningless relationship, quite the contrary! I think it was a very meaningful one for him, one that helped him enter a transitional phase in his life where he can apply his newfound metaphysical wisdom towards his outwardly projections.

Transit Jupiter in Gemini has also been making a conjunct aspect to his Ascendant during this period (until March 2025). Additionally, Transit Saturn in Pisces has been making a square aspect to his Ascendant from April 2024 through January 2025. This is possibly a very crucial time for him to make his plannings into the next era of your career, possibly?

Cue this photo: https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/022/524/pepe_silvia_meme_banner.jpg

His 2024 summer was no vacation, and the rest of 2024 does not look that way for him either, but hard work reaps great rewards! Lets see what is produced out of this era from him. Change was imminent and it is inevitable, hopefully he is riding the waves with ease.

Now onto Sidereal….

Sidereal Zodiac/ Nakshatras:

Notables - I copied / pasted notes about the padas of each sign shown below as a generalization. Like the previous notes, I won't go into further details beyond that just to not write too much lol I don't want to bore y'all.

Capricorn / Shravana Sun (pada 3): The third pada is ruled by Mercury (Budha). Those born in the third pada will be very good with languages, communication, and mathematics. They will be good at writing poetry or articles. They are very social people and will like to work in groups. They will be very good listeners and hence, can find them to be good friends or counsellors. (Sun = Ego)

Virgo / Chitra Moon (pada 1): The first pada is ruled by Sun (Ravi). Those born in the first pada will be natural leaders, will have great inner power and physically attractive. You will have good self-control. You will be authoritative, straightforward and dictating. (Moon - Inner World / Emotions)

Taurus / Rohini Ascendant (pada 4): The fourth pada is ruled by Moon (Chandra). Those born in the fourth pada will be intelligent, sensitive, romantic, and emotional people. They will respect teachers and elders. They will be very competitive. They like to maintain their body attractive. They will be over-ambitious in the process they will thin their abilities a lot. They will have attractive body, long nose, and attractive/watery eyes. (Ascendant = Projections / Outward Expressions).

Capricorn / Shravana Venus (pada 4): The fourth pada is ruled by Moon (Chandra). Those born in the fourth pada will be very sympathetic, kind-hearted, and emotional people. They will be good teachers and guide others easily. They are the ones who take part in community activities like cooking, nursing, etc. They can become addicted to vices easily, causing obstacles in life because of these things in spite of being wealthy.

Capricorn / Uttara Ashadha Mars (pada 4): The fourth pada is ruled by Jupiter (Guru). Those born in the fourth pada will be good preachers and healers. They will be people’s person and will be surrounded by people. They will be spiritually inclined people. They will participate in volunteering activities.

Now let's note the generalized physical characteristics of each Nakshatra in his "Big 5" Some of this might contradict others, obviously it's not an exact science.

Shravana - attractive eyes. They will have short stature. They may have a prominent mole or mark on the face. They will have a lean body. (Not sure about the short stature, I guess it's all about perspective. a 6ft man to me is not tall, but a 6ft 2 man is. Stature can also mean status / reputation.)

Chitra - Male will be lean and will have a commanding presence.

Rohini - expressive eyes, full lips, hips chest are a notable feature, overall beautiful physique. They will have a seductive voice and emotional speech. They will have mostly feminine features and a seductive gait. They are very romantic people and express their feelings mostly with their tone and gestures. They have seductive eyes and can charm the opposite sex easily.

Uttara Ashadha - well-proportioned body with a tall figure. They will have long face, bright eyes, and long nose. They will have mostly fair to pinkish complexion.

Claire Nakti is a lil controversal but her videos are fun to watch, here are some links of each Nakshatra:

Shravana - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l6FWxCG46ZA

Chitra - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GK80ryEDp5c

Rohini - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DhyAx-eifZ8&themeRefresh=1

Uttara Ashadha (Couldn't find a video on just the nakshatra, but here's a video on Sun-Dominant Men such as Uttara Ashada) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WAFSC38uLuo&list=PLMkuwr0afTPh_gk_No5rMVE9fvd3FxOI4

Anyways that's enough for now, I definitely think he falls in this Gemini/Taurus area for his ascendant, and this may not be accurate, but it's fun to play around with the time and find with jigsaw pieces fit Harry's puzzling birth chart lol. Hopefully this wasn't overwhelming!

OH MY GOD! I love you sososoosososo much for sending this in! I literally am OBSESSED with how much time and effort you put into this!

I’d love to hear more of your thoughts based on all of this! Plus what placements you’d think he’d pair well with!

You’re AMAZING!

[anghraine]

Unrelated, but my university finally (as in yesterday) sent me the formal acknowledgment that I've been awarded my PhD and a pdf of the actual diploma with the hard copy being sent in the mail. So this phase of my life is, at last, super officially over.

I'd like to do something fun, but in reality I'm too sick to go anywhere. I tried to think of what would amuse me, and decided ... a Tumblr poll! As you might imagine, a significant portion of my dissertation involved Austen. Since I believe only 1-2 of you know the specific topic, I thought it'd be entertaining (for me) if you wanted to guess which Austen character I mainly wrote about.

(I mentioned all these characters in the dissertation, so in one sense they're all winners! But in the end, it's really one particular character that I was truly motivated to write about at length.)

[mediaeval-muse]

Artists That Inspire Me

I guess since I'm sharing my art a bit, I figured I'd list some artists who inspire me - just in case some of you would like to give them a follow (when possible).

Medieval Art

I have a PhD in Early Medieval English Literature and I've dabbled in Celtic and Norse literature as well, so a bunch of art inspires me from this general era.

Manuscripts

The Junius Manuscript

Lindisfarne Gospels

Benedictional of St. AEthelwold

Old English Hexateuch

The Book of Kells (I also like other illuminated manuscripts from Ireland, such as the Book of Durrow)

I like later medieval stuff, but these hold a special place in my heart. There's a handy list from Wikipedia here, if you want to see more.

Metalwork

I love Irish metalwork. I helped curate a local museum exhibit on it when I was in grad school (mostly reproductions from the early 20th century, so the exhibit was about the so-called "Gaelic Revival").

Some of my favorites:

Tara Brooch

Ardagh Hoard

Cross of Cong

Shrine of St. Patrick's Gospels and St. Patrick's Bell

But I also love Early English and Scandinavia Metalwork.

Sutton Hoo

Staffordshire Hoard

Penrith Hoard

Stonework

High Crosses (especially Ruthwell Cross)

Runestones

A bunch of this can be seen on @memories-of-ancients

Later medieval stuff @cuties-in-codices

19th/20th Century Illustrators and Artists

Harry Clarke

Arthur Rackham

Kay Nielsen

John Austen

A bunch of these can be seen on blogs such as @the-evil-clergyman @thebeautifulbook @enchantedbook

Comics/Games/Fantasy Artists

Jorge Jimenez

Richard Whitters

Sergio Toppi

Georges Bess

@lukaswerneck

Yoshitaka Amano

Here on Tumblr

@abz-j-harding - I just love the eldritch horror

@helenmask - the art nouveau style is breathtaking

@iliothermia - I gasp every time I see one of these works on my dash

@vonnart - this artist was so inspirational while I was working on my dissertation that I thanked him in my acknowledgements

@tendermiasma - everything about their art is so perfect

@wehavekookies - I have a print hanging up in my living room

@llesim - Horror art to die for

@jodeeeart - especially love the goblins

YouTube Channels

vonnart but especially his work for CG Cookie (which I watched a lot of when I was in school)

Jackie Droujko has wonderful tips on character design

Lucas Peinador has good guides for digital art

Marc Brunet also has good guides for digital art

For traditional art, I always watch Proko and Drawing Tutorials Online

I don't do watercolor, but for a long time, I would watch Huta Chan's videos and be mesmerized

When I couldn't figure out how something was done, Tazak came in clutch

For creepy dioramas, check out Minibricks and Thalasso Hobbyer

For tabletop terrain and models, I love watching Black Magic Craft

I sometimes put on Jim Lee's drawing livestreams and watch comics magic happen

Alphonso Dunn has some wonderful tips for pen and ink

Sinix Design and Sycra made anatomy make sense

Whenever I need inspiration or just want to be silly, I put on Drawfee

I'm probably missing a whole bunch, but that's what's on my brain these days.

[berf-a-smurf]

This is so frickin’ sweet 🥹

My Google rabbit hole started with following up on a job lead I got over the weekend and is now going through a random, sizeable paper from someone who studied in Toronto (link is directly to the PDF). Please wait while I let my heart melt for a moment. I’m not about to go looking them up online but I really hope their family is well ♥️

[image ID:

The last paragraph of Morris Tichenor’s acknowledgements in their PhD thesis, reading

“My wife Heather is the sole reason this thesis exists. The journey of completing my dissertation has not been an easy one. I have struggled through periods of anxiety and self-doubt that I would ever finish the writing process. I know she had doubts as well. Her steady and quiet support of me over the past ten years of this program of study, as the rest of my academic cohort and our friends either finished or decided to move on, has not gone unnoticed. I want to thank her for her love, for her understanding, for her patience, and for our two sons, Quintus and Philip, who fill my every day with happiness.”

/End ID]

[siriuslysatorusimping]

Hi yes, it's been a minute since you tagged me but I have arrived, hello. Yes, call me Rai, pretty please, I love being acknowledged. So, ADHD not only features sensitivity to rejection but also at a base level genuine hypersensitivity to negative reactions or social cues in general. A lot of studies indicate that individuals with ADHD (not exclusively, really brain dysfunction associated with anxiety, impulsivity, obsessive/compulsive behavior, etc.) are far more likely to pick up on angry or negative facial expressions compared to 'typical' and are more likely to perceive anger or negative social cues where they do not exist. One of the theories is that there's an issue with aspects of the nervous system feeling at rest or safe. People with ADHD, anxiety, and OCD are more likely to be hypersensitive to their surroundings because they're basically always on high alert for threatening stimuli- not only does it lead to difficulty with negative cues, but it wears the nervous system out, which is why a lot of people also experience serious depressive dips. It's because their body is burnt out from being hyper vigilant. I think this would be so interesting to see in Gojo, especially with his typically cocky and carefree demeanor. Is he unconsciously hyper vigilant or on high alert due to past trauma and dysfunctional nervous system activity and how does that impact him in the grand scheme of things? The brain, man, the brain studies itself and has no clue what it's doing.

Hello!

Rai, you're perfectly fine. You're dealing with a lot, so no worries on taking a lil bit to respond to my dumb ramblings!!

Also, I literally was thinking of having something that kinda shows Gojo letting a bit of the criticism get to him. I've already mentioned that most students hate Gojo, and he doesn't care now. But maybe he used to.

Think about it:

Gojo and Rinko lived separately while they were finishing their PhDs up and the stress of his dissertation and teaching and constantly hearing that his students hate how arrogant he is just starts getting to him, and he starts to crack a bit because he also misses Rinko 🥺

So what does our boy do?

He got his PhD in Kyoto. So he goes to Yuzuki to get cookies because he misses Rinko 😭

We've also seen a small glimpse of shit getting to him in Ten Minutes when he was upset over Gakuganji being a piece of shit. So we know some things get to him sometimes but he usually tunes them out but sometimes the poor boi is overwhelmed, ya know? 🥺🥺🥺🥺

[ghelgheli]

tbh if you read a randomly chosen phd dissertation you will be firmly relieved of any illusions that the purpose of higher education is conferring knowledge. the dissertation, the qualifying document that receiving one's phd depends upon, is openly acknowledged by professors to be of little intellectual importance.

[whatislovevavy]

I got a little something something I wrote as a form of stress relief :) Mine's a bit longer than 100 words lol but I needed to write this. I've been too stressed and tired to write till now. Here's a little treat for all you guys waiting for Learning from the Best oh so patiently, and needed something to read at the Thanksgiving family dinner table <3

“Fuck, please go harder, baby, I need you to go harder.”

Jake’s grunts filled the room as he put every ounce of strength he had into filling her with every inch he had to give. 

Afterall, she deserved it. 

His sweet, little Lass had been working on her PhD thesis for the better part of their saturday together. 

And she needed some stress relief. 

“Fuck, Lass, taking my cock so well, ya deserve it, honey, so fucking smart,”

Her cunt clenched around his cock, making his strained voice even more gravelly as he gripped her hips harder, keeping her waist pinned to the bed as he continued to pound harder and harder into her welcoming cunt. 

Her moans and gasps of breath spurred him on as sweat coated his chest and forehead, his biceps bulging as he held her tighter as she let out garbled pleas and gasps as he continued to set her nerves alight with gritted teeth. 

“Oh, Jake, please. I’m so close, so close,” she keened as a small groan passed her lips. 

He could feel how close she was, how tightly she was gripping his dick, begging him not to leave. 

She gasped as he twisted his hand in her chestnut locks, bringing her back to his chest, relishing in each whimper and sweet, sinful sound that passed his smart girl’s lips. 

His eyes almost rolled back with how tight she was gripping him.

“Fuck, Jake, cum in me, I want to feel you.” she croaked out breatlessly as her high overtook her, her body wracked wth tremors as he continued to pound into her like the quality of her dissertation depended on it.

Because, in a sense, it did. 

He wouldn’t have been surprised if the knuckles of his hand on her hip turned white as he kept her within his grasp as she was overcome with sensitivity.

A deep rooted gut punch groan left his throat, “fuck, sweetheart, so fucking good for me letting me cum inside you. ”

His gravelly, masculine tone and filthy words made goosebumps erupt onto her skin as she still struggled to catch her breath as she felt his release coat her walls, making her clit buzz with excitment. The thought of Jake cumming inside her always made her bite back a moan and clench of her thighs. He let his head fall to her shoulder, taking deep breaths as he let his high settle.

She had learned that Jake was a sucker for creampies and often used it to her advantage. 

It made her smile at the thought of how much effort it didn't take for him to be already pulling off his pants before she could get the full proposal out.

A dazed smile passed her lips as he lathed kisses at the junction of her shoulder and neck, his cock still twitching in her warm, welcoming cunt. 

“You know, Lass. with how much I’m helping you with writing your thesis, I think I should get an acknowledgement at the very least.”

Her dazed smile morphed into a hoarse laugh, making him smile into her neck.

She turned to him, cheeks red and chest still heaving. But eyes bright as sapphires fleaming under a river current that had his heart beating faster and mouth drying up. 

He sighed as she brought a hand up to scratch at the back of his head, toying with the freshly buzzed hair at the base of his skull. 

“Mhm, I do like the sound of “I’d like to thank my loving boyfriend, Lt. Jake Seresin, for fucking the writers block right out of me while I was completing my thesis.”

A full bellied laugh left his chest and that same boyish grin she always loved consumed his face causing her to giggle and smile lovingly. 

“I like the sound of that too,” he whispered, eyes settling on her plush, bite-swollen lips as he slowly leaned in claiming her sweet, soft lips and her soft moans of contentment as her silken walls gently cradled his steadily throbbing cock and his essence still coating her velvet walls and dribbling down between her soft, plush thighs down to the sheets he’d change after a few more rounds of stress relief.  

Tagging for those who may be interested in reading/taking part :)

@marvel-hotchner @nemesis729 @a-lil-bit-nuts @justagirllivinginaghibliworld @mizzzpink @themusingofagothicsoul @mamachasesmayhem @sebsxphia @potato-girl99981  @a-beaverhausen @withahappyrefrain @hangmans-wingman  @callmemana @joalslibrary @peachiicherries @whiskeyswriting @entertainmentgal8@jkbindigo11 @princess76179@clancycucumber230 @teacupsandtopgun@chaoticassidy @superskittles @cherrycola27 @cheekymcgrath @h-ngm-ns @emma8895eb @djs8891 @novastories @urmom-999 @taytaylala12 @zombicupcake3@catsficrecs @abaker74 @kmc1989 @hangmanshoney @caidi-paris @i-wanna-be-your-muse @shara-ne @memeorydotcom@memoriesat30@shanimallina87@whoeverineedtobe @roosterforme @sunlightmurdock @seresinhangmanjake @gigisimsonmars

Okay fanfic writers, your mission, should you chose to accept it, is a filthy 100 word drabble, for any pairing, to be posted on Thursday, in time for American Thanksgiving.

Ready, set, write!

[felixjebastin]

Final PhD Synopsis Writing: A Detailed Guide

Introduction

Drafting the final PhD synopsis is an important milestone prior to submitting your dissertation. It is an abstract of your research that provides the key points of your study in an orderly fashion. A well-structured synopsis ensures that your research is brief, unambiguous, and in the format of evaluation by the specialists in your subject.

Role of a PhD Synopsis

PhD synopsis is a well-defined guide of your thesis outlining the problem statement, goals, research strategy, conclusions, and results. It provides proper insight into your research material for the examiners and ensures everything that should be included in your thesis is also included.

Structure of a Final PhD Synopsis

A typical PhD synopsis will generally adopt a formalized structure, with the following principal components:

Title Page

Title of the thesis

Name of the candidate

University/Institution name

Supervisor's name

Submission date

Abstract

A concise overview (about 300 words) of the research problem, objectives, methodology, key findings, and conclusions.

Introduction

Background and significance of the research

Research problem and its significance

Objectives of the study

Scope and limitations

Review of Literature

Summary of current research on the subject

Identification of research gaps

Rationale for the study

Research Methodology

Research design and approach (qualitative, quantitative, or mixed-method)

Data collection techniques (surveys, experiments, case studies, etc.)

Analytical techniques and instruments used

Results and Discussion

Summary of key findings

What the results mean according to research objectives

Comparison with current literature

Conclusion and Contributions

Summary of key conclusions

Theoretical and practical implications of the study

Future research directions

References

List of all sources referenced in the required citation style (APA, MLA, Chicago, etc.)

Writing an Effective PhD Synopsis: Tips

Be Concise and Clear – Refrain from using unnecessary information and make the content concise.

Adhere to Guidelines – Adhere to the format given by your institution. Have a Logical Structure – Ensure all components are well connected.

Use Proper Citations – Acknowledge all sources.

Proofread Thoroughly – Remove grammatical mistakes and inconsistencies.

Conclusion

The final PhD synopsis is an important document that encapsulates your years of research work in a systematic manner. By adhering to the correct format and keeping the narrative brief, you can develop a persuasive synopsis that effectively conveys your research contribution.

[ghumledunia]

How to Prepare for Viva Exam for PhD and Master’s Students? 🎓🔥

A viva voce (or simply viva) is one of the most crucial moments in your academic journey. It’s your chance to defend your research, showcase your knowledge, and prove your expertise in front of an academic panel. Sounds nerve-wracking? Don’t worry!

With the right preparation, you can confidently handle your viva and impress your examiners. Here’s your ultimate guide to preparing effectively! 🚀

1. Understand the Purpose of a Viva 🎯

Before you start preparing, it’s essential to understand why a viva is conducted. Your examiners want to:

✅ Assess your understanding of your research

✅ Evaluate your methodology and findings

✅ Check for originality and contribution to the field

✅ See if you can defend your arguments confidently

✅ Ensure that you wrote your thesis/dissertation yourself

Understanding this purpose will help you tailor your responses accordingly. 🎤

2. Know Your Thesis Inside Out 📖

Your thesis is the foundation of your viva. Re-read it multiple times so that you’re familiar with:

📌 Your research question and objectives

📌 Key literature and theoretical frameworks

📌 Your methodology and justification

📌 Main findings and conclusions

📌 Any limitations and areas for future research

Try summarizing your research in three minutes—this will help you explain it clearly under pressure! 📝

3. Anticipate Possible Questions ❓🤔

Examiners often ask common types of questions, such as:

🔹 Why did you choose this research topic?

🔹 What is the main contribution of your study?

🔹 How does your work compare to existing research?

🔹 What are the limitations of your study?

🔹 If you could redo your research, what would you change?

Prepare concise yet detailed answers for these questions. Practicing aloud can help you sound confident! 🎙️

4. Practice with Mock Vivas 🎭

A mock viva is one of the best ways to prepare! Ask your supervisor or a colleague to simulate a viva experience. This helps in:

✔ Reducing anxiety

✔ Improving your answering skills

✔ Enhancing your confidence

✔ Identifying areas you need to work on

Record yourself during mock sessions and analyze where you need improvements! 🎥

5. Be Ready to Defend Your Work 🛡️

During your viva, examiners may challenge your arguments. Stay calm and composed when responding.

If you don’t know the answer:

🔹 Take a deep breath and think before speaking

🔹 Ask for clarification if needed

🔹 Acknowledge gaps but show how you can improve

🔹 Never argue aggressively—defend politely!

Confidence and professionalism go a long way! 💪

6. Master Time Management ⏳

A viva can last anywhere from 30 minutes to a few hours. Manage your time wisely:

⏩ Keep answers concise and relevant

⏩ Avoid rambling or over-explaining

⏩ If unsure, take a moment to structure your response

Practicing with a timer can help you manage your responses effectively! ⏰

7. Pay Attention to Presentation & Body Language 🎭

How you present yourself matters as much as your answers. Show confidence by:

👀 Making eye contact

😊 Maintaining a calm and composed demeanor

🎤 Speaking clearly and at a steady pace

👐 Using hand gestures naturally

Good body language shows professionalism and confidence! 🌟

8. Prepare Your Thesis Defense Slides (If Required) 📊

Some universities require a short presentation before the viva begins. If so:

📌 Keep slides clear, minimal, and to the point

📌 Focus on your research question, methodology, key findings, and contributions

📌 Avoid too much text—use visuals and bullet points

📌 Practice your delivery to stay within time limits ⏳

A great presentation sets a positive tone for your viva! 🎤📈

9. Take Care of Yourself Before the Viva 🧘‍♂️

Stress and anxiety can impact your performance. Prepare yourself mentally and physically by:

✔ Getting a good night’s sleep

😴 ✔ Eating a healthy meal before your viva

🍎 ✔ Practicing deep breathing exercises 🧘

✔ Avoiding last-minute cramming—trust your preparation!

A fresh mind helps you think clearly and logically! 💡

10. Follow Up After Your Viva 🎊

Once your viva is over: 🎉 Celebrate your effort—you’ve worked hard for this!

📝 Take note of any feedback given by the examiners

📌 If required, work on minor corrections to finalize your thesis

🤝 Thank your supervisor and supporters for their guidance

Completing your viva is a huge milestone—be proud of yourself! 🎓👏

Final Thoughts: Be Confident & Believe in Yourself! 💡

Your viva is not just an examination—it’s a discussion about your research. Stay positive, prepare well, and trust your knowledge.

If you need expert guidance, our professional viva preparation services can help you practice, refine your answers, and boost your confidence! 🚀💬

💡 You’ve got this—go ace your viva! 💡 🎓🔥

[phdduniya]

How PhD Duniya Helps You Achieve Your PhD Degree

Achieve a PhD through How PhD Duniya Benefits you: Having attained a PhD is considered great not only in terms of gaining lots of opportunities in academia but professionally. Well the ways to reach here are always gruel with huge stress also to follow their plans. This is where comes this kind of site: PhD Duniya. As one of the leading portals for applying for PhD  programs, PhD Duniya makes every process easy by giving personalized guidance and expert mentorship and access to top universities worldwide. Whether you are after a traditional PhD or other alternative ones like an Honorary Doctorate certificate, PhD Duniya is here to ensure your success.

1. Guidance in Applying for PhD Programs

One of the biggest problems in pursuing a PhD is determining the right program and college. With so many institutions, it is a task to navigate through the admission process. PhD Duniya helps you in finding the right phd application by providing all guidelines on how to choose the proper university and program that can go well with your academic and professional goals. Their expert counselors provide personalized guidance, helping you craft a strong application, including writing compelling research proposals and selecting the right supervisors.

2.Access to Prestigious Universities

PhD Duniya has collaboration with some of the top universities across the globe. So, the access to high-quality education and research opportunities is assured to the student. Partnering with such institutions ensures that one can pursue a PhD Degree from world-class universities located anywhere in the world. It provides easy and efficient ways to connect with those universities and take the next step confidently in your academic journey.

3. Extensive Support All Along The Way To Your PhD Study

After you have applied for your desired program, support from PhD Duniya does not end there. That is, they will not only help you in choosing an ideal research topic but, in addition, guide and mentor you in the various processes of your dissertation. Throughout your PhD study, the support of PhD Duniya keeps you focused on and motivated to complete the study successfully.

4.Satisfy Your Honorary Doctorate Requirements

Although universities PhDs follow more or less very conventional programs, PhD Duniya never lacks an honorary doctorate degree offered on a certificate level basis. For someone having contributions that have helped transform something important for which this student stands apart or deserves being rewarded for contributions which come outside submitting a traditional dissertation are taken for granted in awarding him a traditional doctorate, through this link on such prospects PhD Duniya is helping connect you to possible different honorable-doctorate-granting institutes. This is an easy method for experts who have performed remarkably well in their respective fields and desire acknowledgment of their work.

5. Flexibility and Convenience

PhD Duniya, therefore, understands the importance of flexibility when pursuing higher education. Many of the universities they work with offer online PhD programs, allowing you to apply for PhD programs you can complete from the comfort of your own home. So, this flexibility ensures that it is easier than ever to juggle your PhD studies with your other personal and professional commitments.

6. Networking and Collaboration Opportunities

A PhD is not just the process of producing a dissertation but also the inclusion of the scholar into the community of experts in the discipline. PhD Duniya helps build strong connections through access to a global network of academics, researchers, and professionals. This networking opens doors to collaborative research projects, academic conferences, and publishing opportunities, which help grow both academically and professionally.

7.Affordable PhD Options

PhD Duniya believes that getting a PhD degree is not confined to the purse. It avails different funding options, scholarships, and financial advice to ensure students can study for their PhD without fear of cost. This way, pursuing a PhD becomes easier for those who could not afford the same in studying abroad or traditional on-campus programs.

Phd Duniya is a program where one can search and find opportunities to apply for the available PhD programs. It offers everything needed in the various phases of PhD. Either a traditional doctorate degree or finding out for an honorary doctorate certificate, the facilities that you need, guidance you want, will all be given here. With access to top-tier universities, personalized mentorship, and flexible learning options, PhD Duniya is the perfect platform by which you can help achieve your dreams for a PhD degree and produce an impact in your arena of work.

Begin doing your PhD with PhD Duniya and take that first step toward reaching your PhD degree

[kittycatcarla]

Without the member wall (beware, i've taken it with copy paste and not fully checked it):

I’ve been a psychology professor since 2012. In the past six years, I’ve witnessed students of all ages procrastinate on papers, skip presentation days, miss assignments, and let due dates fly by. I’ve seen promising prospective grad students fail to get applications in on time; I’ve watched PhD candidates take months or years revising a single dissertation draft; I once had a student who enrolled in the same class of mine two semesters in a row, and never turned in anything either time.

I don’t think laziness was ever at fault.

Ever.

In fact, I don’t believe that laziness exists.

I’m a social psychologist, so I’m interested primarily in the situational and contextual factors that drive human behavior. When you’re seeking to predict or explain a person’s actions, looking at the social norms, and the person’s context, is usually a pretty safe bet. Situational constraints typically predict behavior far better than personality, intelligence, or other individual-level traits.

So when I see a student failing to complete assignments, missing deadlines, or not delivering results in other aspects of their life, I’m moved to ask: what are the situational factors holding this student back? What needs are currently not being met?And, when it comes to behavioral “laziness,” I’m especially moved to ask: what are the barriers to action that I can’t see?

There are always barriers. Recognizing those barriers— and viewing them as legitimate — is often the first step to breaking “lazy” behavior patterns.

It’s really helpful to respond to a person’s ineffective behavior with curiosity rather than judgment. I learned this from a friend of mine, the writer and activist Kimberly Longhofer (who publishes under the name Mik Everett). Kim is passionate about the acceptance and accommodation of disabled people and homeless people. Their writing about both subjects is some of the most illuminating, bias-busting work I’ve ever encountered. Part of that is because Kim is brilliant, but it’s also because at various points in their life, Kim has been both disabled and homeless.

Kim is the person who taught me that judging a homeless person for wanting to buy alcohol or cigarettes is utter folly. When you’re homeless, the nights are cold, the world is unfriendly, and everything is painfully uncomfortable. Whether you’re sleeping under a bridge, in a tent, or at a shelter, it’s hard to rest easy. You are likely to have injuries or chronic conditions that bother you persistently, and little access to medical care to deal with it. You probably don’t have much healthy food.

Few people who haven’t been homeless think this way. They want to moralize the decisions of poor people, perhaps to comfort themselves about the injustices of the world. For many, it’s easier to think homeless people are, in part, responsible for their suffering than it is to acknowledge the situational factors.

And when you don’t fully understand a person’s context — what it feels like to be them every day, all the small annoyances and major traumas that define their life — it’s easy to impose abstract, rigid expectations on a person’s behavior. All homeless people should put down the bottle and get to work. Never mind that most of them have mental health symptoms and physical ailments, and are fighting constantly to be recognized as human. Never mind that they are unable to get a good night’s rest or a nourishing meal for weeks or months on end. Never mind that even in my comfortable, easy life, I can’t go a few days without craving a drink or making an irresponsible purchase. They have to do better.

But they’re already doing the best they can. I’ve known homeless people who worked full-time jobs, and who devoted themselves to the care of other people in their communities. A lot of homeless people have to navigate bureaucracies constantly, interfacing with social workers, case workers, police officers, shelter staff, Medicaid staff, and a slew of charities both well-meaning and condescending. It’s a lot of fucking work to be homeless. And when a homeless or poor person runs out of steam and makes a “bad decision,” there’s a damn good reason for it.

If a person’s behavior doesn’t make sense to you, it is because you are missing a part of their context. It’s that simple. I’m so grateful to Kim and their writing for making me aware of this fact. No psychology class, at any level, taught me that. But now that it is a lens that I have, I find myself applying it to all kinds of behaviors that are mistaken for signs of moral failure — and I’ve yet to find one that can’t be explained and empathized with.

Let’s look at a sign of academic “laziness” that I believe is anything but: procrastination.

People love to blame procrastinators for their behavior. Putting off work sure looks lazy, to an untrained eye. Even the people who are actively doing the procrastinating can mistake their behavior for laziness. You’re supposed to be doing something, and you’re not doing it — that’s a moral failure right? That means you’re weak-willed, unmotivated, and lazy, doesn’t it?

For decades, psychological research has been able to explain procrastination as a functioning problem, not a consequence of laziness. When a person fails to begin a project that they careabout, it’s typically due to either a) anxiety about their attempts not being “good enough” or b) confusion about what the first steps of the task are. Not laziness. In fact, procrastination is more likely when the task is meaningful and the individual cares about doing it well.

When you’re paralyzed with fear of failure, or you don’t even know how to begin a massive, complicated undertaking, it’s damn hard to get shit done. It has nothing to do with desire, motivation, or moral upstandingness. Procastinators can will themselves to work for hours; they can sit in front of a blank word document, doing nothing else, and torture themselves; they can pile on the guilt again and again — none of it makes initiating the task any easier. In fact, their desire to get the damn thing done may worsen their stress and make starting the task harder.

The solution, instead, is to look for what is holding the procrastinator back. If anxiety is the major barrier, the procrastinator actually needs to walk away from the computer/book/word document and engage in a relaxing activity. Being branded “lazy” by other people is likely to lead to the exact opposite behavior.

Often, though, the barrier is that procrastinators have executive functioning challenges — they struggle to divide a large responsibility into a series of discrete, specific, and ordered tasks. Here’s an example of executive functioning in action: I completed my dissertation (from proposal to data collection to final defense) in a little over a year. I was able to write my dissertation pretty easily and quickly because I knew that I had to a) compile research on the topic, b) outline the paper, c) schedule regular writing periods, and d) chip away at the paper, section by section, day by day, according to a schedule I had pre-determined.

Nobody had to teach me to slice up tasks like that. And nobody had to force me to adhere to my schedule. Accomplishing tasks like this is consistent with how my analytical, Autistic, hyper-focused brain works. Most people don’t have that ease. They need an external structure to keep them writing — regular writing group meetings with friends, for example — and deadlines set by someone else. When faced with a major, massive project, most people want advice for how to divide it into smaller tasks, and a timeline for completion. In order to track progress, most people require organizational tools, such as a to-do list, calendar, datebook, or syllabus.

Needing or benefiting from such things doesn’t make a person lazy. It just means they have needs. The more we embrace that, the more we can help people thrive.

I had a student who was skipping class. Sometimes I’d see her lingering near the building, right before class was about to start, looking tired. Class would start, and she wouldn’t show up. When she was present in class, she was a bit withdrawn; she sat in the back of the room, eyes down, energy low. She contributed during small group work, but never talked during larger class discussions.

A lot of my colleagues would look at this student and think she was lazy, disorganized, or apathetic. I know this because I’ve heard how they talk about under-performing students. There’s often rage and resentment in their words and tone — why won’t this student take my class seriously? Why won’t they make me feel important, interesting, smart?

But my class had a unit on mental health stigma. It’s a passion of mine, because I’m a neuroatypical psychologist. I know how unfair my field is to people like me. The class & I talked about the unfair judgments people levy against those with mental illness; how depression is interpreted as laziness, how mood swings are framed as manipulative, how people with “severe” mental illnesses are assumed incompetent or dangerous.

The quiet, occasionally-class-skipping student watched this discussion with keen interest. After class, as people filtered out of the room, she hung back and asked to talk to me. And then she disclosed that she had a mental illness and was actively working to treat it. She was busy with therapy and switching medications, and all the side effects that entails. Sometimes, she was not able to leave the house or sit still in a classroom for hours. She didn’t dare tell her other professors that this was why she was missing classes and late, sometimes, on assignments; they’d think she was using her illness as an excuse. But she trusted me to understand.

And I did. And I was so, so angry that this student was made to feel responsible for her symptoms. She was balancing a full course load, a part-time job, and ongoing, serious mental health treatment. And she was capable of intuiting her needs and communicating them with others. She was a fucking badass, not a lazy fuck. I told her so.

Over the years, at that same school, I encountered countless other students who were under-estimated because the barriers in their lives were not seen as legitimate. There was the young man with OCD who always came to class late, because his compulsions sometimes left him stuck in place for a few moments. There was the survivor of an abusive relationship, who was processing her trauma in therapy appointments right before my class each week. There was the young woman who had been assaulted by a peer — and who had to continue attending classes with that peer, while the school was investigating the case.

These students all came to me willingly, and shared what was bothering them. Because I discussed mental illness, trauma, and stigma in my class, they knew I would be understanding. And with some accommodations, they blossomed academically. They gained confidence, made attempts at assignments that intimidated them, raised their grades, started considering graduate school and internships. I always found myself admiring them. When I was a college student, I was nowhere near as self-aware. I hadn’t even begun my lifelong project of learning to ask for help.

Students with barriers were not always treated with such kindness by my fellow psychology professors. One colleague, in particular, was infamous for providing no make-up exams and allowing no late arrivals. No matter a student’s situation, she was unflinchingly rigid in her requirements. No barrier was insurmountable, in her mind; no limitation was acceptable. People floundered in her class. They felt shame about their sexual assault histories, their anxiety symptoms, their depressive episodes. When a student who did poorly in her classes performed well in mine, she was suspicious.

It’s morally repugnant to me that any educator would be so hostile to the people they are supposed to serve. It’s especially infuriating, that the person enacting this terror was a psychologist. The injustice and ignorance of it leaves me teary every time I discuss it. It’s a common attitude in many educational circles, but no student deserves to encounter it.

I know, of course, that educators are not taught to reflect on what their students’ unseen barriers are. Some universities pride themselves on refusing to accommodate disabled or mentally ill students — they mistake cruelty for intellectual rigor. And, since most professors are people who succeeded academically with ease, they have trouble taking the perspective of someone with executive functioning struggles, sensory overloads, depression, self-harm histories, addictions, or eating disorders. I can see the external factors that lead to these problems. Just as I know that “lazy” behavior is not an active choice, I know that judgmental, elitist attitudes are typically borne out of situational ignorance.

And that’s why I’m writing this piece. I’m hoping to awaken my fellow educators — of all levels — to the fact that if a student is struggling, they probably aren’t choosing to. They probably want to do well. They probably are trying. More broadly, I want all people to take a curious and empathic approach to individuals whom they initially want to judge as “lazy” or irresponsible.

If a person can’t get out of bed, something is making them exhausted. If a student isn’t writing papers, there’s some aspect of the assignment that they can’t do without help. If an employee misses deadlines constantly, something is making organization and deadline-meeting difficult. Even if a person is actively choosing to self-sabotage, there’s a reason for it — some fear they’re working through, some need not being met, a lack of self-esteem being expressed.

People do not choose to fail or disappoint. No one wants to feel incapable, apathetic, or ineffective. If you look at a person’s action (or inaction) and see only laziness, you are missing key details. There is always an explanation. There are always barriers. Just because you can’t see them, or don’t view them as legitimate, doesn’t mean they’re not there. Look harder.

Maybe you weren’t always able to look at human behavior this way. That’s okay. Now you are. Give it a try.

good read for teachers.