#Process Monitor
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The moon will cry too
Alt bg plus the original colours (✿◕‿◕✿)
#art#Persona 3#persona 3 reload#minato arisato#makoto yuki#Ryomina#<<<< Implied....#my art#Leel's art#I told myself to do a quick piece and he appeared :]#This was fun! I hated working on it.#I do like how he came out though I just hate the process of doing lineless art#Don't ask me about the caption whenever I think of P3 I think of Nyx only so. she's everywhere.#I do love minmin though shout out to my favourite persona protag#Also.#If you notice the hair highlight. It's like a heart monitor. because.
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for all my suspiciously-Deadpool behavior, the way that Logan is so joyful about finally finding someone to match his freak. that resonates with me actually.
#it's that grin as he's pinned down by Wade that floors me#because yeah#if i was in Logan's situation and I'm in the process of realizing the person I'm actively against is MEETING me as an equal#he isn't afraid of me. he isn't afraid for me.#he deals his damage and expects me to double down. the same way that i deal damage and expect him to double down#it's sex. they didn't fuck (that we know of) but it was sex.#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool#wolverine#logan howlett#deadpool 3#wade wilson#poolverine#deadclaws#deadpool 2024#i know your snipers are on the roofs monitoring me being deadpool#and this is me shaking them all off#I'm a Wolverine#down to the motherly instincts and the aggression as a love language I'm all that
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😚😚💖💖💖 (pose ref)
#hetalia#geritapan#hws japan#hws germany#hws italy#hws north italy#italy veneziano#aph japan#aph italy#aph germany#kiku honda#feliciano vargas#ludwig beilschmidt#hws axis trio#aph axis trio#myart#i've been working on this for AGESS the coloring took so long bc my monitor died (again) so getting the colors to look ok was a struggle 😭#well that and i've been busy and not having much time to draw in general (sad). which made the process rather slow#but i'm pretty happy with how it turned out ☺️ i like the vibe it ended up with#geritapan my beloved.... they've been on my mind a lot lately#using the same art meme from last time for them once again. the specific referenced pose is d2!#i've seen geritapan double kiss arts with both germany and japan in the middle (all super cute) and wanted to do one with italy there too 🥰
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I wanted to share the tattoo I did yesterday!!
I really enjoyed the process🥹🫶 My “normal” art is generally a lot more detailed and time-consuming than these fanarts…something I genuinely LOVE is just spending lots of time focusing on the small details & forgetting everything else.
I’m overall really happy with how this turned out, I’ve been practicing A LOT😳 but even so, pork skin isn’t the same as a living, breathing human. I think this design might have been a BIT too complicated to be my first one but oh well…I learned a lot and pushing myself off the deep end is always how I learn best😆😆😤🙏
#in the future tbh what I want to do is realism and famous paintings etc#but tbh whatever bc I just love drawing😫💓#anyways would you want to see more of these??????????? like update on my process??#or just keep this blog as an eloise worship center😆#(I vote for that)#personal#and before anyone comes at me…in spain apprenticeships don’t really exist…#I go to a studio they’re all muy majos and they help me a lot…#give me lots of advice monitor my progress etc etc#but at the end of the day they’re just like distant mentors I hang out with😆😆 have to do it all on my own…#so I’ve been collecting lots of victims and hopefully over the next month I can do a few more😇🙏#it’s a strange process tbh#but I also had a few studios show interest in hiring me once I get more experience#so we’ll see if they follow through!!!!!!!🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏#also I’ve been very flustered/nervous in the last week bc of this so#if I’ve been weird about responding etc etc THIS IS WHY😭😭😭😭😭😭😫#I’m slowly trying to catch up….🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰#also my last note is that my super sweetie pie but somewhat incompetent bc took the picture of me tattooing😆😆😆#I take what I can get…
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Commissions likely opening on Monday!
Ended up only opening once this month due health reasons, but all is well and I'm now back to my regular pace!
#found out so many cool things aboit my health#my tummy doesnt process b12 and iron properly so no im looking into injection for that whooray#my vitamin D is so low but so low that it matches people with osteoporosis lmao#i need to touch more grass#they suspect me to have that rare diabetes that makes you piss#other than that i am fine#nothing on this list is serious#just REALLY annoying and time consuming and have to be monitored all the time
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i look at you and my eyes are so so so wet like with tears tears of pure emotion and extend out my closed fist and then I open up my hand and you see her. my troll oc. the greatest oc. from 2013. I brought her back and redesigned her and im insane about her again. i begin sobbing on the ground. she’s so small. itty bitty……….
#this is melosa she is everything to me#weeping crying sobbing oh my god look at her awwwww AWWWUGHHH WEEHEHHH#sorry for not answering asks I was drawing this and buying some little bug guys who really rule.#id like to answer them soon im just a little burnt out#yeah she has an ankle monitor and hidden shock collar… little guy gets into a lot of trouble.#she’s the first jadeblooded cicada on her colony so they haven’t culled her for her antics.#the cicadas are essential to communicating with the mother grub#however by sabotage/accident she was given to a lusus for a more normal jadeblood and the nest parasite process went wrong#leading to her being rejected by her lusus : ( <im sooo edgy.#she spent a good deal of her time as a pretty young wriggler wandering around stealing from other trolls in the complex. the youngest troll#are raised in the interior layer of the planet.#she’s always been a rambler. she’s in the WALLS. she managed to break into somewhere super secret she wasn’t supposed to which got#The tracking device stuck on her. if she gets into areas she’s not supposed to be the collar might shock her.#she’s pretty miffed about the whole thing!! it doesn’t help with her exsisting issues with aggression#she likes making people mad and making people fight. just an angry wrath filled little guy#she wears the collars on her horns to stop anyone from trying to calm her down#bugstuck#buggy trolls#homestuck#homestuck oc#fantroll
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Cardiology results came back guys. I still have a heart 👍
#ra speaks#personal#it’s still a little weird for a heart* but it hasn’t changed from last year.#*ascending aorta too big left ventricle too small. we’ll see what the holster monitor says after they process it next week.
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i'm sooooo ol-<
#these goddamn colour settings are gonna drive me insane-!!!#i'll get some pieces looking more-or-less like their old selves#but then something else will look washed out or too dark or whatever#and then i try to fix that and another set will look off#i think a part of it is that this monitor's brightest and darkest colours are way more intense than my old one#so it screws with my colour perception a lot#i know i cannot possibly get everything looking like it does on my old monitor#but i want my reds/yellows to look warm and bright without destroying the more neutral colours in the process#is that too much to ask
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we know.
#(grabs from the scripts) I utilize approximately one quadrillionth of one percent of my processing capabilities#to monitor your biometric readings and determine that you are feeling ok#albeit slightly gassy.#sayerposting
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youtube
#input#comprehensible input#output#processing#academia#keyboard#mouse#monitoring#3d printing#print#digital printing#Youtube
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#immigrants#undocumented immigrants#immigrant rights advocates#broadview#illinois#chicago area#ankle monitors#mass deportations#broadview immigration processing center#trump
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the other day i got out of bed to wash my hands bc i had cheez it residue on them and by the time i got to the sink my vision started to blur and my legs like stopped working so i accepted my fate and collapsed onto the sink ready to conk out only to hit my head on the faucet which somehow reverse conked me back into consciousness
#chronic illness#with a ?#still in that diagnostic process which i have been in for like 6 months#i had my primary care dude tell me it was POTS two years ago#but then i started getting some wild ass heart palpitations so then i got put on not one not two but three heart monitors#so i guess the pots thing went out the window for the time being#but i really need to remind the specialist im seeing about that bc its not fun#pots#heart problems#heart monitor
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once again can’t sleep but have a full day of work tomorrow + things to do after 🤘
#at my doctors appointment next week I already have a laundry list of issues to address#but the first thing I’m gonna say is now not the most pressing which is my meds but the fact that I can’t sleep because holy fuck#I have not slept properly or at all this whole week#curse the doctor who took me off meds for my insomnia maybe this one will prescribe new ones#manifesting that and antidepressants a psych referral blood tests and once more restarting the diagnosis process for my physical issues#bc no doctor ever wants to start where me and the other doctors left off they have to rule out for themselves everything I don’t have#when it is literally obvious AND my grandmother was recently diagnosed for the same issues I’m having#at this point the one test I haven’t had done is literally the one thing it could be that I have every symptom and prerequisite for#also if I have to wear a heart monitor again I’m killing someone bc I’m allergic to the adhesives they use to stick it to your chest
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wait i also thought you got hit by a car (or smth) again whats up with the heart monitor then if you dont mind telling 😭
the fact that multiple people immediately jump to the conclusion of me getting hit by a car again is taking me out
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Why are meds worse then the mental illnesses they're trying to treat
#i have that delightful bipolar#and when i was younger i got on meds and they were great and i had no side effects and it was great#but then i moved out of service and didnt have a doctor and so i went sbout s yesr unmedicated#and you cant just jump back into a full dose of these. so ive been working my way back to a workable dose#and now theyre making me feel like verifiable shit. i have to assume its the meds#bcuz the effects start an hour or so after i take my daily dose#i feel like im high but the evil version. i know that doesnt make sense#brainfog. body doesnt want to move. having trouble staying awake. nausea. and now mild chest pain#someone put me out of my misery please#blessedly i see my psychiatrist on tuesday#but im so frustrated with medications. when i was younger i went through quite a few while i was being diagnosed#i started with an antidepressant that out me into a manic episode. although at the time we didnt know i was bipolar#then a med that caused (cant remember the actual name but) swelling around my heart (had to take so much ibuprofen and wear a heart monitor)#then i got on this mood stabilizer that works kind of. once they tried to add an antidepressant bcuz i have so much depression#but that caused mania again babey!! so we stopped that#i had one anxiety med that just knocked me out long into the next day. cant be anxious if youre in a coma#then an anxiety med that dropped my blood pressure real bad which is not ideal. i just dont take anxiety meds anymore#and now restarting this one. side effects. yippee. i wiuldnt mind being mentally ill if only the medication process wasnt so shitty#i was sitting up on my bed trying to eat but it was too hard for my hand to move the fork to my mouth#i was just staring at my bowl of food and not even really processing it. so i layed down and here I am#just trying to stay alive ig. im gonna take a covid test to rule that out but it seems to flare up right after taking my meds#pray for me to survive until Tuesday when i see my psychiatrist
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