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olive-main · 6 months ago

Note

oooo if you’re interested would love to see your take: reader is Azriel’s mate, nobody knows. The inner circle keeps trying to set him up with females (including Elaine & Gwyn). They like reader but don’t view her as an option for being his partner. Lots of angst, she’s hurting, she overhears them saying she’s not an option for him. Up to you what happens for her and Azriel. Loved your last story, and that you wanted more angst ideas!! And if this isn’t what you’re looking for, all good!

Between Us Alone

Pairing: Azriel x Reader

Summary: Azriel’s mate overhears a conversation that shakes her confidence in their hidden bond, but he reminds her that love, even in shadows, is unbreakable.

Wc: 1.2k

A/N: Annndddd welcome back to our regularly scheduled programming. This time I come with the gift of some fluff (with angst ofc bcs duh—who do y’all think I am?) Enjoy the happy endings while they last…..evil laugh

Masterlist

——

The corridors of the House of Wind were quiet, save for the faint hum of conversation that drifted from Rhysand’s office. You’d gone looking for Azriel, hoping he might steal away from his “boys’ night” early and join you at your shared apartment.

A secret, the two of you. Hidden in plain sight. Quite fitting for Rhysand’s spymasters.

It was exhilarating at first—the quiet smiles across rooms, the fleeting brushes of hands, and the stolen glances when no one else was looking. But there were cracks now, small fissures of insecurity that made you wonder if keeping the bond private had been the right choice.

Your footsteps slowed as you neared Rhys’s office, voices clear now, though you didn’t mean to eavesdrop. You were about to knock when you caught the sound of Cassian’s boisterous laughter.

“Oh, come on, Az,” Cassian said, his tone teasing. “You’ve been spending all that time with Gwyn. Don’t tell me you haven’t thought about it.”

“Gwyn’s sweet,” Rhysand added. “And she clearly enjoys your company. You’d make a good pair.”

Your heart clenched painfully, the words hitting you like a physical blow.

Azriel’s reply was quieter, almost unreadable. “Gwyn is a friend. I’m not looking for… that.”

Cassian scoffed. “You say that now, but it’s been centuries, Az. When was the last time you even tried to let someone in? Gwyn’s perfect for you—kind, strong, clever. She gets you.”

“She’s not the only option,” Rhys said smoothly. “There are others. Nesta’s mentioned a few priestesses who would be good matches.”

Cassian nodded in agreement. “There’s also Y/N.”

You pressed your hand to the doorframe, your breaths shallow as you heard Cassian say your name.

“No, I don’t see them together. They rarely speak to each other outside of missions and a few shared words at dinners.” Rhysand says with a shake of his head as if the thought of you and Azriel together was the most unlikely thing he could think of.

You shouldn’t have stayed, shouldn’t have listened, but you couldn’t move. Couldn’t breathe. They didn’t mean to hurt you—you knew that. You’d always been on the periphery of their circle, a friend but never a true equal in their eyes. Azriel’s shadows had been your sanctuary, his quiet love a solace you cherished.

But to hear them speak so casually, as if you weren’t even a possibility…

Azriel’s voice cut through, firm and unyielding. “I don’t need you to play matchmaker. I can handle my own life.”

“You’re avoiding the question,” Cassian said, clearly amused.

“Drop it,” Azriel snapped, his tone brooking no argument.

The room fell silent after that, but the damage was done. You turned and fled, the ache in your chest twisting tighter with every step.

—

The space you shared with Azriel was small but cozy, tucked away in a quiet corner of Velaris where no one thought to look. It was your haven, the only place you could truly be yourselves without prying eyes or whispered questions.

But tonight, it felt suffocating.

You sank onto the couch, wrapping a blanket around yourself as the doubts clawed at your mind.

This charade was necessary. You both knew that. If they ever found out you and Azriel had been together for months—years, now—it would complicate everything. Not just for him, but for you.

As Azriel’s partner, you worked in the shadows as he did, your work as vital and delicate as his own. Secrecy was second nature to you both, and you’d agreed early on that revealing your bond—to anyone—was too risky.

You’d thought you could handle it. But moments like this, when they talked about Azriel’s love life like you didn’t exist, like you weren’t his, made you question how much more you could endure.

You told yourself it wasn’t Azriel’s fault. He hadn’t encouraged them. He’d even told them to stop. But the weight of their words lingered, stirring fears you’d tried so hard to bury.

What if they were right? What if Azriel deserved someone like Gwyn, someone who could stand beside him without the need for secrecy?

You didn’t hear the front door open, too lost in your thoughts to notice the familiar sound of Azriel’s footsteps until he was standing in front of you.

“Something’s wrong,” he said immediately, his hazel eyes scanning your face. His shadows swirled around him, restless and sharp. “What happened?”

You shook your head, forcing a smile. “It’s nothing. Just tired.”

His brow furrowed, and he crouched in front of you, his hands resting gently on your knees. “Don’t lie to me.”

The sincerity in his voice nearly broke you. You looked away, your throat tightening as you tried to hold back tears.

“Y/N,” he said softly, tilting your chin up so you had no choice but to meet his gaze. “Tell me.”

You hesitated, the words sticking in your throat. But you couldn’t keep it in any longer.

“I went to Rhys’s office,” you admitted quietly. “I was going to find you, but… I heard you all talking.”

Azriel stiffened, his jaw tightening. “What did you hear?” He already knew. There was only one part of the conversation that could’ve had you so distraught.

You swallowed hard. “They… they were trying to set you up with someone. Gwyn, mostly. Rhys mentioned others.” You laughed bitterly, the sound hollow. “They said I wasn’t even an option.”

Azriel’s eyes darkened, his shadows curling tighter around him.

“They didn’t mean it to hurt me, I know that” you added quickly, seeing how Azriel was ready to go back and pummel his brothers. “They don’t know about us. But… it still hurt.”

He exhaled sharply, standing and pacing the room. His hands curled into fists at his sides. “They had no right—”

“They care about you,” you interrupted. “They want you to be happy. And maybe they’re right. Maybe you’d be better off with someone like Gwyn. Someone who—”

“Stop.”

The word was a command, sharp and unyielding. Azriel crossed the room in an instant, kneeling before you again. He took your hands in his, his grip firm but gentle.

“Don’t you dare doubt this,” he said fiercely. “Don’t you dare doubt us.”

Tears spilled over, and he reached up to brush them away, his touch achingly tender.

“You are my mate,” he said, his voice breaking. “You. Not Gwyn, not anyone else. You are the only one I want, the only one I will ever want.”

“But they—”

“They’re idiots,” he said flatly. “I’ll deal with them. But don’t let their ignorance make you doubt what we have.”

You searched his face, finding only unwavering certainty in his eyes.

“I love you,” he said, his voice softening. “More than I thought I was capable of. And I don’t care if they don’t see it. I see it. I feel it.”

A broken laugh escaped you, relief washing over you like a tide. “I love you too.”

He pulled you into his arms, holding you tightly as if he could shield you from the world.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured. “I never wanted you to feel like this. I thought keeping the bond private would protect us, but if it’s hurting you—”

“It’s not,” you said quickly. “Not really. I just… I needed to hear this. To hear you.”

He pulled back just enough to press his forehead to yours. “You’ll never have to doubt me again.”

——

Aren’t they just so sweet *sigh*. Thank you for reading <3

Requests are still open ;)

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ambivalence-is-me · 8 months ago

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All I Want (One-Shot)

Pairing: Azriel x reader

Summary: Do opposites really attract? Feyre didn’t think so but Y/N and Azriel prove her wrong.

Word count: 1.8k

Warnings: fluff

A/N: this is kinda from Feyre’s pov, beginning of ACOMF. I’m in love with the idea of someone from the outside looking at two people in love. I’m thinking of turning this into a series? Or just more one shots? Like write about the dates, the wedding, that stuff. Let me know if anyone would be interested to read it!

————————————————————-

Feyre was shocked. Well, lately it seemed that’s all she was: shocked with a side of skeptical and scared. How else was she supposed to feel after everything she’s been through? She’s thinking of the very first times Rhysand took her to the Night Court. It was during one of those ‘’visits’’ that she first met you.

‘’She’ll help you with anything you need’’ he had said and that you did.

Feyre had taken one look at you and didn’t really know what to think. Physically you didn’t look like a threat, you were beautiful (it seemed there weren’t ugly faes) and your posture was relaxed, like you weren’t standing in front of the Cursebreaker but just another fae. You were smiling kindly at her, no judgement in your eyes and then you started talking.

And you never really stopped.

You were a yapper. Answered all of Feyre’s questions as best as you could and more. You walked her through the court’s history, culture, customs, everything. On her second meeting with you, she had concluded you definitely weren’t a threat. Instead, you were easygoing, kind and just freaking…happy? It seemed like you were always shinning, that nothing can bring you down. Feyre had tested that after a particularly bad day when Rhysand was driving her up the wall. But instead of running away, you stayed and helped her, saving Rhys from another shoe-throwing incident.

You had this soft and gentle angle that reminded her of her sister Elain. But you weren’t quite as graceful as Elain. You were louder, clumsier and upbeat, not afraid to strike up a conversation with anyone about anything. And you definitely weren’t like her sister Nesta but she could tell you shared her observation skills.

Truthfully, for Feyre, you were a saving grace. Someone she could go to in this new world that was thrown at her. She never really expressed any of this of course, scared that if someone found out you’d be in harm's way but she kept you close to her whenever possible.

That’s why Feyre was extremely happy that you were accompanying her to a dinner with Rhysand’s family. Thanks to the information Feyre had gathered from you and meeting them beforehand briefly, she inferred that you obviously knew them but you never stated what was your relationship with them.

Which is why Feyre is now shocked to see the turn of events.

She had expected you to be close friends with them, how can you not? You were a social butterfly and if Rhysand’s family was anything like him, she was sure you had befriended all of them. And you had but not in the way Feyre had expected.

‘’Feyre darling, care to share why you look so shocked?’’ Rhysand asked her with that stupid smile of his. But she couldn’t even bother to answer him, not when she was still staring at the scene in front of her.

Again, Feyre had met these faes…briefly. She’d experience Mor’s welcoming energy, Cassian’s cheeky smiles and jokes, Amren’s silver bright eyes and of course…Azriel’s quiet and intimidating presence. The latter preferring to stay in his shadows and observe the chaos around him.

Which is why Feyre NEVER expected for him to be with…you.

Obviously Feyre didn’t know him, not at all, just what you and Rhysand had told her but she was confident that her observations of him helped her come up with an idea of him. It seemed that she was wrong.

They were all gathered in this beautiful grand room, just chatting and sipping on expensive wine before dinner. Cassian and Amren were in conversation in a corner of the room, the latter looking annoyed at whatever the big Illyrian was saying. You, Mor and Azriel occupied a big comfortable looking sofa. You and Mor leading the dialogue and Azriel, unsurprisingly, was just sitting there listening and assessing. But that’s not what had Feyre shocked. No, it was the fact that you were almost sitting on the Shadowsinger’s lap.

He had one whole arm wrapped around your waist, it screamed ‘’she’s mine’’. His other hand touching your hair softly, as if he put any more pressure on it, it would break. His eyes went back and forth between all of the faes in the room but stayed mostly on you. And Feyre didn’t know if he knew that he was smiling.

SMILING

A small soft smile that Feyre didn’t know the Shadowsinger was capable of. It made him look a thousand times more irresistible. A thought that didn’t go unnoticed by Rhys, who arched an eyebrow at her in return. But Feyre didn’t say anything, she opted to try and hide her surprise and continue on with the evening.

An evening that only continue to bamboozle her. At the dinner table, you were sitting infront of Feyre. Azriel on your left side, Cassian on your right. It was a pretty funny picture Feyre would love to paint. Your frame and sunshine aura in the middle of two big intimidating Illyrian soldiers. As she had expected, you were mostly leading the conversation during dinner. Cassian and Mor quickly keeping up with your jokes and laughter, Rhysand chimed in at times but seemed content to take it all in with a soft smile. But Feyre was observing Azriel and Azriel was observing you.

His eyes didn’t seem to wander off too much, seemingly staying on you throughout the night. He looked at you like you held the world in your hands. Honestly, Feyre had never seen anything like this up close. There were no doubts that this male was incredibly in love with you and honestly, Feyre didn’t even know how to react.

Feyre thought she loved Tamlin at one point but now, after witnessing how Azriel looked at you, just this one look, she was extremely in the wrong.

If you moved, Azriel moved. He was so attentive to your needs: refilling your drinks, serving you more food, he held your hand, brushed your hair away from your face; all of it without you having to ask once. At one point, you looked at him with a smile Feyre hadn’t seen from you before and kissed his temple. An act so simple and yet so intimate that Feyre had to look away. Small tears graced the corner of her eyes, her chest felt so…whole?

She was in a room full of so much love that it was overwhelming her. This isn’t what she expected at all.

You seemed to notice that something was wrong with Feyre. Asking her with your eyes what was wrong. But she didn’t say anything, just gave her a look that you hoped would understand that said ‘’we’ll talk later’’. And later you did.

‘’You’re with Azriel?!’’ She had all but exploded the next day when it was just the two of you.

You smiled and said ‘’Yes’’ like it was a fact so obvious that Feyre should’ve have known. But it only confused her more.

‘’But-you-you’re so…’’

‘’Different?’’ You finished. The same smile still on your face. Feyre could only nod.

This wasn’t the first time someone had questioned your relationship with Azriel. To be fair, you were the very first one to question it back when you started courting a couple of hundred years ago. Because the truth was that you and him truly were opposites. You, an extrovert and him obviously an introvert.

But it was your differences that somehow made it work, that completed each other. At the beginning it had taken time. You never seemed to stop talking and you worried that it was only annoying Azriel. But you never did, at least, he insists that you don’t. But you’ve learned to know his little quirks and expressions. You’ve learned when to stop your yapping around him, particularly only for few moments after he’s had a bad day. You’ve learned his ways, and he learned yours.

He learned to interpret the moments when you kept a conversation going because you wanted to and not because you felt like you HAD to. He learned how to ground you back and remind you that your job wasn’t to make everyone’s day brighter. He learned to take care of you, and you took care of him.

You explained all of this to Feyre, a soft smile never leaving your face when you talked about your Shadowsinger and Feyre couldn’t help but smile back.

‘’In the human world, we- ‘’..She cleared her throat. ‘’When people love each other, they get married but here that seems so…miniscule. Like, marriage isn’t enough for the love you and Azriel have.’’

It was the best thing Feyre could say because really, she didn’t know how else to compare the love you and Azriel seemed to have.

You beamed at that. ‘’I thought the same actually but our wedding day was one of the best days of my life. Right after our mating ceremony.’’

Feyre looked confused. Mating ceremony? But you only kept smiling.

‘’ We’d already been married for a hundred years when the bond snapped. Mating bonds are so special and rare, Feyre’’ You looked at her.

‘’I was already blessed to have found a male that loved me and all of my loudness. And then, to be gifted a mating bond with him?’’ You shook your head as if you still couldn’t believe it.

In truth, even many years later, you still couldn’t. And that was all Azriel. He made you feel so incredibly happy and whole. He still made you feel like a fool, as if you’re a female who’s experiencing falling in love for the first time. And perhaps that’s why the shock Feyre had felt still hadn’t left. Because she couldn’t comprehend how you and Azriel made it look like it was just yesterday that you got together. Like you were still in the honeymoon phase.

Feyre had seen married couples in her village. They fought and yelled at each other frequently, almost never held hands and especially didn’t show public display of affection. But what you and Azriel had didn’t look like that AT ALL.

Later, after you had left saying ‘’Azriel said he had a surprise but I’m pretty sure I know what it is. I don’t care what his job description is, I can find out what he’s planning!’’, Feyre was still processing your love story.

It didn’t seem real. It didn’t seem real that two people/fae could love each other so much, who would do absolutely freaking anything, including die, for each other. After her experience with Tamlin, Feyre wasn’t sure if she’d ever have what you and Azriel have. Deep down inside, she wanted it. She felt like she didn’t deserve it, specially after what she’s done but…she hoped that maybe one day, however far it may be, she would have someone who would look at her like Azriel looks at you.

#azriel x reader #azriel x y/n #azriel x you #azriel fanfiction #azriel acotar #azriel fanfic #azriel fluff #azriel one shot #feysand #azriel fic #azriel shadowsinger #azriel series #azriel #azriel imagine

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lunarxcity · 3 months ago

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Why lie? (Part VIII to Why me?)

azriel x rhys' sister! reader

angst/eventual comfort ( angst angst confessions and more angst!! Don't mind me rubbing my hands together and cackling maniacally in the corner)

Summary: When you walk in on Azriel and Elain the mating bond snaps leading you to flee to Autumn with Eris so you can be free of Azriel. Your absence causes Azriel to come to some drastic realisations, but is it already too late and has your time in Autumn led to you moving on?

Parts I, II, III, IV, V, VI, and VII if you missed them!

Your mother had once told you that the longer you ignore a problem and let your emotions brew, the thicker your anger becomes. You do appreciate the sentiment of dealing with your problems head on and you kept that in mind as you downed your 6th? Maybe 7th? Goblet of wine.

Right now you didn't want to deal with your emotions or the emotionally charged state that Azriel's presence had left you in so you did the next best thing and had gotten drunk.

Laughing unboundedly, you spin Nesta around on the dance floor. The music played, an accompaniment to the sound of the Night Court revelry. It had been a few hours since you had arrived and after your reunion with the court, you had been drinking and dancing for the rest of the Night.

The lively music which had been playing began to transition into a slow dance. The last dance of the evening, according to the conductor of the mini-orchestra that your brother had hired. Cassian marched up to you guys and held his hand out, an unspoken invitation for his mate. She nodded to you, half in apology and half in thanks, and was whisked away by the Illyrian warrior.

You sighed, unable to tell if you were dizzy from the spinning or from all the drinks you'd had throughout the night. Azriel was usually your dance partner at the end of the night. While everyone would pair off with their mate, it had become an unspoken promise that you guys would save the last dance for each other. He would whisper bits of information he learned throughout the ball, and you would try to not look shocked at some of the things that he's learned. It would give you both a moment of respite from your roles and actually let you enjoy yourselves at the ball.

You did see Azriel leaning against a pillar in all his glory, blade on his hip and cat-like hazel eyes scanning the room accompanying his blue siphons and wind-tousled hair. He looked like a dream. One that you've had many times over the years where the spymaster saves you from irreparable danger and confesses his undying love. It was a dream that had started in your adolescence, and now you saw why it needed to stay there.

Your mate. The one you were supposed to be destined to be with. The one you had to watch be in love with another member of your family. Twice. Your traitorous heart skipped a beat or two.

You put in too much work and had gone through too much pain to still be hung up over him. A single dance wouldn't change anything. You turn around giving your back to the shadowsinger and see Eris directly in front of you.

He doesn't even give you a chance to question him as he grabs your hand with one hand and your waist with the other and whisks you away into a Waltz.

You're sitting at your vanity for the first time in months. After your dance with Eris, the ball had ended and everyone had gone home. Your room is different from how you remembered it, the emptiness of your objects was something you were expecting, but all your things had appeared to be slightly shifted which had thrown you off.

There was also another scent that seemed to underly all your things that you were choosing to ignore, thinking about for peace of mind.

You were freshly showered and in your nightgown. Your room was dimly lit, with the only source of light being a few candles that were flickering in the dark.

You were brushing your hair when there was a knock at the door. "Come in." You looked in your mirror to see who entered. Your hand stopped mid-brush as your eyes met Azriel's hazel ones through the mirror.

He opened the door and began to enter the room timidly, like a child approaching a cat scared that they were going to scare it away.

His voice is soft and careful, "I didn't see you after the ball." No questions about why you blew up at him or what you meant to say before you were cut off.

You take a breath. You really didn't want to see him tonight, you thought that you had time before you had to speak with him again, but it seems like Azriel's will is stronger than your avoidance.

"I left right as it was over. I had to help Eris and Lucien settle in." The tension in the room was palpable. Your words had been polite, but there was a bite in them. You never leave without Azriel. He was only a few feet away, but distance between you two was greater than it has ever been.

"You have been spending a lot of time with them lately. Especially Eris." His words were bitter, like poison, the kind that he wished he could have slipped into Eris' drink when he saw you and him dancing together.

"Well, I'm sorry if I wanted to be hospitable to official guests of the Night Court during their stay here. Especially when they treated me so well in Autumn." Your anger immediately flared up. How dare he question you in this way.

"Well, what I was seeing seemed a lot more than hospitality." Azriel knew he messed up the second the words were out. He had gotten a better handle on his emotions since the mating bond snapped, but seeing you with Eris dancing and laughing all evening was something that he wasn't prepared for when it was him who you were supposed to be dancing with.

Seeing his mate in the arms of another opened up the floodgates of emotions that he wasn't prepared to deal with.

You put your hairbrush down. "You are seriously putting my integrity into question? Also what I do with whom is none of your business shadowsinger."

You turn around to face him, a million emotions burning in your eyes, "Besides, why do you care when you are already pursuing a relationship with one of their mates?" He flinched at the last word that left your tongue.

His wings dropped and there was a look in his eyes that you couldn't quite place. Fear? Shock? You had never spoken to him like this. He didn't know what to do or how to react.

You started at each other in the silence until he decided to break it.

"Why did you never tell me you were upset with me? You're telling me I can't fault you when you left without saying a word?" He asks almost pleadingly.

"I had to sit here and watch you talk to everyone else in our family, knowing that I had somehow wronged you without knowing what it was that I even did." He broke eye contact, took a breath and resumed.

You were shocked you had no idea where this was coming from or that he was this aware of your actions in the first place.

"You can't say it wasn't me because I know you and every sign points to me being the reason you left. You leave without telling me and then come back and ignore me. You're acting all buddy buddy with enemies of the Night Court and refuse to talk to me." You look away from him, it's your turn to avoid eye contact now.

He doesn't accept this and walks up to and gets on a knee. He's so tall that kneeling, he is almost eye level to you sitting. He tilts your chin up to meet his gaze.

"What happened to us?" He is almost pleading with you. Longing in his gaze, but longing for what? Longing for the attention he's been accustomed to that you won't give him anymore?

You're exhausted you can't even pretend that nothing is wrong anymore. You meet his eyes, resolution written across your features.

"You have a family that loves you Azriel. You have Rhys, you have Cass, and you have me. You were going to throw all of that away for a Blood Duel with Lucien Vanserra over Elain."

Panic flashes across his features. "That was in the past I've changed-" He tries to reassure you with everything he has in himself that it was in his past. He's changed. Why would he want that when his mate was right in front of him?

"You were ready to die, Azriel, and I understand that you think your life is worthless and I wish I could go into your head and change the way you think and I wish I could go back in time and cut down anyone who has ever wronged you and make sure that your father suffers tenfold, but you were going to leave behind everyone that loves you for a woman with a mate." Tears well up in your eyes and you take a breath.

You are really trying to hold it together, but you don't care anymore about hiding anything from him. There was a crack in the dam and everything came spilling out.

"I know you saw the blade I was going to gift you for Christmas. It wards off a singular death blow and I spent so long calling in favours and having it crafted for you because I know that with your loyalty and selflessness, you would one day meet your end in the name of someone you loved."

Azriel's resolve is cracking and you can see his eyes beginning to glisten in the candlelight. His shadows left him, giving you guys privacy for this tense moment except for the singular shadow that has been sitting on your wrist for months.

"I would have given you the blade for the duel, but that would've been the end of our relationship as you knew it."

More tears spill and you don't even try to fight them. "I dealt with you prioritising Elain over me and I have dealt with your questionable decisions when it comes to women for hundreds of years, but to kill Lucien for wanting to fight for his mate or killing yourself because you think you're unworthy of everything in this life is something I couldn't deal with. Not when I have spent my entire life being there for you and fighting for you."

You were full on crying and Azriel was fighting tears. You can could the number of times on your hands that you had ever seen Azriel cry.

His hands move from your face to your hands and he hands his head in shame.

"I couldn't- I can't" You hiccup.

He pulls you into his chest, you want to fight him, but you are full-on sobbing and no matter how mad you are at him he is a comfort that you struggle to resist, especially in your emotionally exhausted state.

"You can't expect me to just sit there and watch that and pretend like I'm not upset." Your words are muffled in his chest.

He's stroking your hair with one hand and holding you close with another. "I was very unhappy. I thought something was missing and the answer to the emptiness within myself was Elain. It seemed too perfect, three brothers for three sisters and I told myself that. I convinced myself that I would never be truly happy until I had what my brothers had."

Azriel takes a breath. He's not used to spilling his emotions out for anyone to hear them, he's been working on it, but this sort of thing was new for him.

"I thought our bond was solid and you said you didn't mind me spending time with Elain, so that's what I focused on. The emptiness had never gone away and I convinced myself that the Blood Duel would fix my problem one way or another."

You pulled back from his chest and he made sure you were looking him in the eye as he said this because he knows he would never be able to say it again.

"I'm so sorry for everything. I have never had anyone care about me the way that you do and I became so used to it that I started to think it was a right, that I was entitled to your care."

He blinks away tears and looks to the side, pausing momentarily as if he's trying to find the words.

"I have never been more miserable than in the time that you were gone. Not hearing from you is the worst punishment the Mother has ever bestowed me with and I would rather give the wings off my back than to sentence myself to that treacherous fate. I'm sorry I was so careless before."

He takes your hand and puts it over his heart. "I swear to the Mother or whatever gods that will listen that should I forsake you ever again in either this life or the next, that may they take pity on my wayward soul and sentence me to a fate worse than death for all eternity."

You feel his heart racing under your palm and you feel the breath that he takes. "The only terrible fate that I can imagine of that magnitude is being away from you. Is never being around you or seeing your smile or hearing you laugh because if there was one person that I would ever want to be stuck with for all eternity it would be you."

His eyes bear into your soul with an intensity you had never seen from the shadowsinger. He is very good at his job, but has never been one to deal with his personal problems head on.

You feel the mating bond in your chest. It has been snuffed out for a while, a result of you ignoring it, but now you felt it stirring, almost fighting for its survival.

"You don't have to forgive me right now or even a hundred years from now. But I need you to know that I am sorry for everything and I will fight to earn your trust again and be worthy of you."

His eyes flashed with a determination you had never seen directed at you from the shadowsinger and you had no idea how to react.

You just nodded your head. "Thank you Azriel."

Azriel has never had to pour his heart out like this. He never realised how hurt you were from his actions and it certainly didn't help that he could feel your emotions through the bond.

He brings you in again in an all-consuming hug and feels pain, so much agony that must have been building up for years and years. He brings you in to an all encompassing embrace and begins to cry into your shoulder. "I'm so sorry."

He cries out and means it. He can feel the wetness on his shirt from your tears while he mars your nightgown with his own. He sits there and holds you as he falls apart and you let him, never seeing him in this state before.

He feels your pain and his own and the world feels like it's ending, but the contrast of the comforting warmth of your hold keeps him together.

At one point he noticed that your breathing had evened out. You had fallen asleep. He carries you over to your bed and lies you down. He sits next to you a moment taking in your features.

Your brow is furrowed and your jaw is clenched, for a moment he's scared that his anxieties and anguish are bleeding onto your side of the bond, but since it hasn't snapped for you yet he shakes the thought off.

At the sight of you sleeping, his shadows come back and encompass your resting form. They surround you, checking your sleeping form for danger and settle around your outline in the bed.

Azriel begins to feel the exhaustion of the past day settle into his bones. The mating bond snapping. His fight with Rhys. Watching you dance with Eris at the ball. Fighting with you. Spilling his feelings out. It had all been so much both physically and emotionally.

He was about to make the move to get up when you started mumbling in your sleep. He turned back to you and you turned in your sleep towards him.

Azriel watched you for a moment longer and unknowingly, in your sleep you had grabbed his arm. Azriel didn't know what to do because he should get up, but you were here holding onto him.

He brushed your arm off and had begun to walk away when you had started tossing and turning. He told himself that this was for your benefit, that you needed a good night's sleep and that he would be gone before you even woke up.

Bringing over one of the chair's right next to your bed, he sits himself down next to you. He leaves his arm on the bed and you immediately roll over and press your check into his hand, holding onto his arm. He lets himself revel in the touch because he knows it's the only one he is going to get from you.

Your tossing, turning, and mumbling stopped and he heard your breathing and heartbeat even out, as you were taken into a deep sleep. The sight of your peaceful slumber had started to make Azriel sleepy.

He leaned back in his chair and even though it was not the most comfortable position he had ever been in, he felt himself being dragging into the lull of sleep. Azriel has never had much luck with sleep, it was something he fought against every night waking up multiple times and struggling to stay asleep. Even though he was in a chair, your presence was comforting enough to allow him the luxury of a restful night of sleep. As the last bits of his consciousness were slipping away, Azriel focused on the warmth of your hand and thanked the Mother and swore that he would make it right if it was the only thing he would do for the rest of his days.

The Mother looked at Fate. He scoffed at her, "So dramatic this whole mating bond business is. If they're meant to be together then why isn't she just accepting him already?"

Fate had never been particularly patient. He believes that the time for everything was now because putting off your fate is an impossible feat.

The Mother believes in divine timing. Everything will occur when it is meant to. The Mother and Fate have been going back on forth on this issue for years.

She looks at him, amused by his eagerness, "Because it's time for him to show her that he can fight for her and himself. That's the important part, he's just realising now the error of his ways at least give him some time to prove it."

The Mother moves her chess piece into an advantageous move. Fate looks pensive.

She teases him, "Don't tell me you're actually getting attached to these ones."

He smiles, a wicked sight filled with smugness and a sureness that he did not always have. "They remind me of us in the beginning. I am beginning to become quite fond of them."

He's about to counter her attack when he pauses for a second. "But I like to think I didn't look that pathetic."

The Mother offers an immediate retort as he moves his piece. "You're right. You were more pathetic." She moves her piece.

"Hey now-"

Fate has always been cruel and unyielding, but the Mother had softened him over the years, a realisation he begins to acknowledge when he realises that he does want these two to end up together and curses himself for being a part of the reason it's been dragged out so long. He can almost hear his sister Karma laughing somewhere in the distance.

part ix

note: I honestly really struggled with this part. The conversation was something I really wanted to get right and while it's not a complete resolution, them actually beginning to get their emotions out is a good thing and progress in their relationship. I hope you guys are enjoying this story and as always thank you darlings and until next time!

note note: There were some troubles with the taglist that I hopefully fixed in this part and as always this will be edited eventually!! Hopefully...

My lovely taglist: @alimarie1105 @chaosabroad @bbontenswhhore @tele86 @ashblooddragons @circe143 @i-am-infinite @princesssunderworld @thestartitaness @tiffany-xx @cpfantasybooks @lucia-valentinaa @jennigsonl @ivy-34 @firefly-forest @k-homosapien @coeurdeveea @cherryjain17 @bckynatt @becstersworld @rcarbo1 @gojospearlycim @atluky @juliebluehufflepuff @willowpains @abadfantasybook @neverendingstay @hellohauntedturnstudent @highladyofhogwarts @littowl @iluvyewman-blog @lunaticpotatoe @justlivinginadaydream @julesiebean @shylahstarzz @olive-main @lreadsstuff @noonenuts @sourapplex @aquellaspequenascosas @anuttellaa @honethatty12 @moonlwghts @kittymeyers @beabogsims @sillyfreakfanparty

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bluiela · 2 months ago

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What's funny is I have seen not ONE e/riel ever talk about Elain's emotions and how traumatizing it must be for her to be lured, kidnapped and held captive. How she must've felt in those moments. How will she tells us in her book about them and how she would heal from them.

BUT, the ONLY talk I ever see is "oh how romantic it was when Azriel rescued her" "oh so romantic that she was gagged and bound and carried her in his arms to safety when she was actively running for her life" ehehe peak romance. (Fighting like hell to prove that kidnapping and rescue scene is oh so romantic)

It really sums up their entire side. They only care about self insert and how they can insert tropes into the characters.

#acotar #sjmaas #pro elucien #Save elain from them #elucien #pro gwyn #gwynriel #pro gwynriel #antielriel #elucien supremacy #elain x lucien #pro lucien vanserra #anti elriel #pro elain #pro elain archeron #elain archeron #elain acotar

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illyrianbitch · 6 months ago

Text

In Every Universe

Pairing: Reader x Azriel, Minor Elain x Lucien

Summary: Elain catches you asking Azriel if you're destined to be together in every universe.

Warnings: mostly fluff, pining, soulmatism, brief mentions of violence/blood/death, elain as your no.1 shipper, elucien being sweet

Word Count: 3.9k

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

The wood of the doorframe was rough beneath Elain’s fingers as she lingered in the opening.

Elain loved the Day Court—the sun-kissed glow of her skin, the endless warmth that felt like home. But every now and then, it was healing to return to her family, to see them, to know they were okay. Visits to the Night Court with Lucien at her side were rare since they’d started their family, but they always felt meaningful. There was a peace in these nights, a quiet place to rest and breathe. And sometimes, it gave her this: a glimpse of the people she loved, caught in the small, unspoken ways they cared for one another.

The room was quiet, save for the soft hum of the celestial device. Feyre had told her about it, but Elain’s mind had forgotten to store away the proper name. She blamed it on her pregnancy brain at the time of the conversation. The device glowed as it slowly spun, scattering faint patterns of light over you and Azriel as you stood together, watching in awe.

It was slightly ironic to Elain that she was able to sneak up and observe such an intimate moment without Azriel, the most-feared Spymaster, noticing. But, in all truth, she wasn’t entirely surprised. You and Azriel had your own world, held moments that seemed like they existed only for you two—even Azriel’s shadows became something else entirely, something distracted and completely enamored with you.

“It’s… beautiful,” you said, the words reverent. “Gods, what a wonder we live in.”

Azriel hummed a sound that sounded a lot like agreement— like complete contentment. Elain recognized it slightly, almost felt compelled to compare it to the cat that Vassa and Jurian had dubbed the true ruler of the mortal lands. She stifled a laugh at the thought.

You pointed at something—a star, perhaps—and said something Elain couldn’t hear, your voice too soft. Azriel tilted his head toward you and his shadows swirled around you both, gentle and calm tendrils wrapping themselves through the edges of your hair strands. Azriel murmured something back, and though Elain couldn’t catch the words, she saw the way they made you smile.

There was no hesitation in his movements as he reached out, scarred fingers brushing a strand of hair from your face. His touch was light, practiced, and it made him look entirely at home. Of course it did. He’d done it a hundred times before. You didn’t flinch or startle—didn’t even pause. Instead, you tilted into him slightly, the curve of your smile deepening.

Elain’s heart blossomed. She wondered, for a brief, fleeting moment, if anyone had seen such moments with her and Lucien– wondered if her eyes glowed just like yours.

Azriel shifted his gaze to you, and Elain could have sworn she watched his eyes dilate even from feet away. His thumb grazed your temple as he asked, “What are you thinking about?”

You leaned into the brush of his fingers. “Oh, it’s nothing.”

“Nothing?” Azriel repeated, amused. His thumb drew a lazy circle across your skin. “I can practically see the gears turning in there.”

A laugh. You shrugged, and a glimmer of amusement sparkled in your eyes. “It just makes me wonder.”

“About?”

Elain found herself leaning forward slightly, awaiting your answer as if she had been talking to you herself. You casted a glance back at the device before you.

“What else is out there, you know?” You tilted your head in contemplation, and Azriel pulled you into a soft embrace as you continued, “And that Bryce girl. I mean, if there are other worlds like hers, do you think…”

Azriel wrapped his arms around your center, placing an affectionate kiss to your clothed shoulder. Then, he placed his head into the crook of your neck. “Do I think what, my love?’

You turned your head to meet his eyes. “Do you think we’re together in each of them?”

He didn’t answer immediately, his silence thoughtful rather than hesitant.

And then the room began to shift. Or maybe it was just Elain. She stood up straighter and took a deep breath as the device before you both blurred, its golden light fracturing into something softer, quieter— a divine invitation.

Elain let herself be pulled through.

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

The cannon fire echoed like thunder.

One, then another, and another still.

Azriel’s head tilted. “Two,” he murmured. “Close.”

You couldn’t move, couldn’t even breathe. Your mind raced through the possibilities—faces you’d seen only hours ago. A girl in the meadow. That boy with the scar. Maybe someone who’d deserved it. Maybe someone who hadn’t.

“So that makes it five.” You gripped the hilt of your blade tighter, sweat slipping down your palm. “Besides us, there's only five left.”

Azriel was quiet.

“Come on,” he said, already turning. “You need to head east, away from the canons. I’ll lead them away from you.”

You caught his wrist. It was instinct, almost violent, and your nails dug into his skin. “No.”

He stopped. Turned back slowly, and furrowed his brow. “What do you mean, ‘no’?”

“I’m not leaving you behind. We finish this together. You can’t keep putting yourself—”

“I can,” he cut in, voice cold. “And I will.”

“I won’t let you.”

Something cracked in his expression then. His lips parting like he wanted to argue, like he was ready to fight.

“Let me?” he repeated, his voice low. Dangerous. “You don’t get to decide that.”

“And you don’t get to decide for me.”

There was a silence that filled the space between you. Your hand, still wrapped around his wrist, softened into something almost reminiscent of a lover's hold.

“Don’t make me watch you die,” you said finally. “Don’t do that to me, Azriel.”

His eyes softened just enough to hurt.

“I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you alive.”

“Why?” Your voice cracked, but you didn’t care. “You can win this. You know you can. Why throw away your chances for me?”

His mouth opened, then closed. He exhaled sharply, shaking his head like the words were too heavy to say. But when his gaze met yours, there was no hesitation.

“You know why.”

You shook your head. “No—”

“It’s the same reason you killed that girl from six.” His voice was quiet. “For me.”

You didn’t deny it. You couldn’t. His hand, warm and calloused, brushed the back of your fingers.

“So don’t ask me to stop,” he said. “The capitol has taken so much from me. They’ve destroyed everything I cared about. I won’t let them take you. Not while I’m still breathing.”

A loud crack sounded in the distance. The world shifted again, a soft breeze carrying with it a sky speckled with stars.

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

Cicada songs threaded through the air like an ancient hymn. You sat near the embers of a dying fire, the orange glow licking against the edges of the stone walls surrounding you.

Azriel sat a few paces away, his back resting against one of the columns. His tunic was simple, sandals dusty from the day’s travel, but there was something about the way he held himself that made him seem as much a part of the night as the stars overhead.

“Do you think they truly listen?” you asked him.

Azriel’s gaze flicked to you. “The gods?”

You nodded, not sparing him a glance. Your eyes were glued to the heavens above, to the glistening stars that seemed to be leaning closer, listening.

“They hear everything,” he responded. “The question is whether they care.”

You turned to him then, the corner of your lips twitching into the faintest hint of a smile. “You don’t honor them?”

Azriel’s eyes scanned your face before he responded simply, “I’ve been given no reason to.”

“And you aren’t afraid of angering them?”

“I’m afraid of man more than I am of the gods.”

A flicker passed through your face, something thoughtful, contemplative. “What would you pray for, if you thought they did listen?”

For a moment, he didn’t answer. His scarred hands rested on his knees, the firelight painting shadows across them. There was a weight in his silence, a deliberation that pressed against the edges of the night. Finally, he spoke, his voice quieter than before, almost a confession.

“I’d ask them to leave us be. To let us live without their meddling.”

You studied him. The sincerity of his words seemed to tug at something in your chest. “You think they’d grant a prayer like that?”

Azriel’s lips curved into a small, wry smile. “No,” he said simply. “But I’d still ask.”

You huffed a small laugh, shaking your head. “Stubborn,” you murmured, though your tone was warm.

When he fell silent again, you observed him once more. “What else is on your mind?”

Azriel didn’t answer right away. His gaze turned back to the fire, as if searching for something in its depths. “You could be one.”

You blinked at him, thrown. “One what?”

“A god,” he said, his eyes shifting to meet yours. “A proper one. A kind one.”

Your chest tightened, nerves prickling at the edges of your mind. “Azriel,” you said, your voice low, almost a warning. “Don’t say that.”

“Why not?” he asked. “If I can see it, do you think they can’t?”

You glanced up at the stars, as if expecting them to strike him down then and there. “Because it’s not for us to claim,” you whispered. “And because it’s not true.”

Azriel leaned in slightly. “It is true,” he said, as though daring you to contradict him. “You stand apart. You always have.”

“Azriel—”

“I mean it,” he said, his voice softening. “If they did listen, if they cared, they’d envy what I see in you.”

You didn’t know how to answer. Azriel reached out then, his scarred hand brushing a strand of hair from your face. You swallowed hard.

“And what of you?” You asked. “If I’m to be a god, would you be one, too?”

He shook his head and a sweet smile made its way onto his face. His brows furrowed softly. Your fingers twitched as if you ached to smooth the crease between them.

“I think I was born to follow you.”

The fire light around you flickered, and the music of the cicadas began to reverberate, stretching and pulling like a ribbon in the wind. Soon, sounds began to fill the air—smooth instruments, slow and electric.

Warping, stretching, bleeding into something else.

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

You were perched on a velvet stool at the edge of the bar, watching the crush of dancers sway in time to the music. There was a faint scent of cigarette smoke that clung to the air, a smell that somehow mingled perfectly with the sharp tang of liquor and the sweetness of spilled champagne.

Azriel appeared beside you without a word. He wasn’t dressed to stand out— black suit, white shirt, no tie— but somehow, in the haze of golden light and shadow, he drew every glance. You adjusted the strap of your dress, the sequins catching what little light there was, throwing sparks of silver onto the walls.

“You’ve been hiding,” he said.

You turned your head to meet his gaze. There was something steady in it, like he’d been waiting for you to notice him. “I didn’t know I was being looked for.”

Azriel’s lips curved. “You always are.”

Your breath hitched, just enough to be noticeable, but you masked it with a sip of your drink— one with fading bubbles. “And here I thought I was just another face in the crowd.”

“Not to me,” Azriel said simply, as if it were the plainest fact on Earth. His gaze didn’t leave yours. “Never to me.”

The band transitioned into a slower tune, the saxophone drawing out a melody that made your face soften. You looked down to hide your growing smile, cheeks now rosy from Az’s attention.

“You’re not dancing,” he noted, eyes flicking briefly to the crowded floor.

“I don’t know if it's the right night for that.”

“Maybe you just need the right partner.”

The suggestion hung in the air, and when he held out his hand— scarred, steady— you didn’t hesitate to take it. He led you to the dance floor with a gentle hold, drawing you into his arms.

“You didn’t have to come find me,” you murmured, your gaze tracing the lines of his face.

Azriel’s eyes softened, and the corners of his mouth lifted into a soft smile. “I’ll always find you.”

The music slowed, and the world softened with it.

And then, the light dimmed, fading into the deep, quiet shadows of something colder, untouched, an air heavy with the scent of pine and earth.

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

Two wolves emerged from the shadows, moving together, their coats brushing in fleeting touches. It was a quiet language— small movements of instinct and closeness. One was a shadow itself, dark fur absorbing the moonlight. The other was lighter, sleek and graceful, its movements quieter but no less assured.

The darker wolf paused, tilting its head toward its companion, a huff of warm breath visible in the chilled air. The lighter one hesitated, then stepped closer, nuzzling its muzzle against the dark wolf’s neck, a gesture of comfort—or reassurance. The dark wolf stilled at the touch, its golden-hazel eyes half-closing as if the simple act of connection mattered more than the world around them.

And then it turned, moving quietly into the heavy, shrouded forest. The lighter wolf turned to follow the dark one, glancing back only once before disappearing into the trees.

A sharp shift—the silence of the forest soon replaced by the soft crunch beneath leather winter boots.

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

You and Azriel approached the house ahead, its exterior draped in a plethora of colorful Christmas lights. The world was still, save for the muffled laughter drifting from inside, and you pulled your coat tighter against the cold.

“We’re late,” you murmured, quickening your step.

Azriel let out a quiet laugh. “I doubt they mind.”

You shot him a pointed look, but Azriel only chuckled again. He wrapped his arm around your shoulders, pulling you closer as he pressed a soft kiss to your temple.When you reached the door, your hand had barely touched the handle before Azriel stopped you, his hand brushing yours. You glanced up at him, frowning, only to catch the cheeky grin tugging at his lips as he tilted his chin toward the frame.

There, hanging above the doorway, was a sprig of mistletoe.

“Mistletoe,” you said with a sweet hum. You met Azriel’s eyes.

“Cassian or Nesta?” He asked.

“Definitely Nesta,” you said. “She loves her romance.”

He nodded in agreement. “It is a romantic tradition.”

Azriel stepped closer, lifting a hand to cradle your face as he kissed you—soft and unhurried, like he had all the time in the world. When he pulled back, your cheeks warmed under his gaze, his forehead brushing yours as he whispered, “I love you.”

The words were soft, meant just for you.

“I love you, t—”

The door sprang open and a shrieking voice filled the air with an excited, “Momma!”

You barely had time to turn before your son barreled into your arms, his eyes bright and his arms outstretched. You caught him easily, lifting him with a grin.

“Hi, sweetheart.”

“Hey, buddy,” Azriel said, leaning over to ruffle his messy curls. His mini-me only giggled and nuzzled deeper into the crook of your neck. A true momma’s boy. From inside, more laughter echoed, and Cassian appeared around the corner, grinning wide as he carried your daughter—upside down—by her ankles. Her delighted shrieks filled the house.

“Cassian!” you called, trying to suppress a laugh.

“What? She loves it!” Cassian shot back, clearly pleased with himself.

“Put her down,” you said, stepping inside as Azriel snorted behind you.

Cassian finally relented, lowering her to the ground. She didn’t hesitate, darting forward to wrap her arms around Azriel. She barely reached his hip, and he crouched slightly, holding her close like it was second nature.

“Sorry we’re late,” you said, closing the door. You wiped your shoes on the matt below you.

“Don’t worry about it,” Nesta’s voice said, drifting into the room before she rounded the corner from the kitchen. Her hair was in a loose bun, a steaming cup of tea in her hands. She stopped at Cassian’s side, offering her husband a small nudge. “Our date nights always run late too.”

Her daughter trailed behind her, blue eyes already half-rolling. "Yeah. We need to talk about punctuality in this family."

She breezed past you and Azriel, offering you both quick hello’s before darting up the stairs.

Nesta rolled her eyes, but the action was affectionate. Comfortable. “Teenagers,” she muttered. Cassian slung an arm around her shoulders, grinning. “She’s going through a phase.”

“Heard that!” came a sharp voice from upstairs.

You stifled a laugh, glancing at Azriel. His eyes widened slightly, and the corner of his mouth tugged into a crooked, almost reluctant smile—amused, exasperated, and entirely Azriel.

Nesta gestured toward your son, now half-asleep against your shoulder, and your daughter, who was eagerly tugging Azriel toward the living room to show off the fort her and Cassian had made. “Enjoy this,” Nesta said with a smirk. “While it lasts.”

A dreamy smile spread across your face as you watched them. “Oh, Nes,” you said softly. “I plan to enjoy it all.”

The room seemed to shimmer, the sounds of laughter melting into something darker, quieter.

And then, without warning, the world changed.

Cold. Hollow. Dark.

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

“God, you look beautiful.”

You turned to Azriel, breathless, a wicked grin pulling at your lips. His golden-hazel eyes burned as they swept over you, lingering on the streaks of blood splattered across your cheek.

“You really think so?” you hummed, stepping closer, boots crunching against the broken glass scattered across the floor. The room reeked of iron and fear, the man slumped against the wall choking on his last breaths.

Azriel tilted his head, his shadows twisting and curling at his feet like they were alive, waiting for a command. “I’d argue you’ve never looked more stunning.”

Your grin grew, something divinely sinful, and you pulled the gun from the back of your waistband. The barrel gleamed in the dim light. “Would you like the honors, my love?”

Azriel’s hand brushed yours as he took the gun— perfectly smooth skin speckled in streaks of red. “Of course.”

The man whimpered as Azriel crouched before him, his shadows licking at the edges of the room, swallowing the light. You didn’t flinch, didn’t look away as Azriel tilted the man’s chin with the barrel, his voice low and almost tender. You seemed proud, even. Powerful.

“You should’ve known better.”

With a single, swift pull of the trigger, it was over. Azriel stood, wiping the gun against his pants before turning back to you.

“The others are all yours,” he murmured, his free hand brushing a strand of hair from your face, smearing blood across your temple.

“And they said romance was dead,” you said, leaning into his touch.

Azriel grinned, and for a moment, the bloodlust that had overtaken the room seemed to fade. He pulled you close, lips crashing onto yours in a brutal, animalistic kiss. When you finally pulled away, breathless and wild, Azriel’s gaze was sharp—hungry. His eyes gleamed with something darker now.

“You’re the only one who ever understands,” he whispered.

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

“Elain?”

Elain gasped and snapped back to the present, her body slightly recoiling like a thread once strung tight. She blinked and turned her head, watching the beautiful face of her mate come into focus. His eyes were fixed on her, that familiar gleam in them.

“Hmm?”

A smile tugged at the corner of his lips. “Where did you just disappear to?”

Lucien’s hand gently swept her curly hair over her shoulder, exposing her neck, and allowed his palm to settle there— fingers brushing lightly against her skin, thumb grazing the underside of her jaw. Elain melted into the touch.

The remnants of her vision— of that twisted, vicious kiss between you and Azriel– still lingered at the edges of her mind, making her uneasy. But it was already fading, like a bad dream melting away in the morning light, as she looked at Lucien. The warmth of his touch steadied her, grounding her back into the reality of this life— something far less terrifying, far more full of light. Elain let her mind wander to the other thing she’d seen, to the cicada songs and the mistletoe.

“Let me tell you later.”

Lucien’s smile softened in that kind way that made Elain’s heart feel full, like it might spill over. “Alright,” he said.

“Oh, Elain, Lucien!”

Your voice broke the quiet, pulling their attention toward you as you approached, Azriel in tow. His shadows moved faster than he did, twisting around you in fluid motions, draping themselves over your limbs like they were part of you instead of the shadowsinger himself.

“Have you been here for long?” You asked as you met them at the doorway. “I’m so sorry we didn’t notice. We were in our own world.”

Azriel greeted her and Lucien with a small smile. But, as usual, his eyes drifted to you immediately, brightening in their glow as he watched you.

“No, no,” Lucien answered, noticing Elain hadn’t responded yet. “We were just making our rounds.”

You beamed. “Well, you should take some time in here. It’s beautiful.”

“I wouldn’t want to interrupt,” Elain said softly.

You shook your head, glancing at Azriel for a moment before you leaned into him, placing a hand on his chest and giving it a light tap. “We’re actually about to leave. We’ve got reservations for our anniversary.”

“What does today mark?” Lucien asked.

Azriel’s voice was light as he wrapped an arm around you. “430 years.”

“Can you believe he’s put up with me that long?” you said, a teasing smile on your lips.

Lucien laughed. “I’d say its the other way around.”

Azriel laughed, then, too, rolling his eyes in a way that seemed so brotherly that Elain’s smile almost split her cheeks in two.

“You’re meant for one another,” Elain found herself saying. “Happy anniversary.”

Azriel nodded in thanks as you smiled and moved to leave. He patted Lucien’s shoulder as he brushed past, and Elain let her gaze linger on your retreating forms for a moment, catching another small moment as Az cheekily smacked your ass, causing you to let out a small amused shriek and push him away.

For a moment, Elain was almost tempted to ask Lucien the same question you’d asked Azriel: Do you think we’re together in each life? But it was silly– fruitless, really. Because Elain knew, with certainty, that she’d find her loyal, flame-branded mate in every universe. In every form.

She’d seen it herself.

So instead, Elain grabbed his hand, interlaced their fingers, and said, “Let’s admire our world.”

And as always, Lucien followed her without protest.

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

authors note:

I had a vision (tehehe) of this one shot and i dont think i did it justice but alas, here she is. also are you truly soulmates if you arent evil sociopathic villains in at least one universe? me thinks no

also fun fact, 5/6 of these au’s are scrapped ideas i’ve had🫣

thank you for reading <3

permanent tag list 🫶🏻 (this so desperately needs to be updated, i fear):

@rhysandorian @itsswritten @milswrites @lilah-asteria @georgiadixon

@glam-targaryen @cheneyq @darkbloodsly @pit-and-the-pen @azrielsbbg

@evergreenlark @marina468 @azriels-human @book-obsessed124 @bubybubsters

@starswholistenanddreamsanswered @feyretopia @ninthcircleofprythian @velariscalling @azrielrot

@justyouraveragekleemain @marigold-morelli @mrsjna @anarchiii @alittlelostalittlefound-blog

@melissat1254 @secretsicanthideanymore

@m4tthewmurd0ck @beardburnsupersoldiers @isnotwhatyourethinking @tothestarsandwhateverend @raginghellfire

@angel-graces-world-of-chaos @paradisebabey

azriel tag list🫶🏻:

@thisiskaylin @serrendiipty @acourtofsteelandthunder @mortqlprojections @ushijima-stits

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lady-of-tearshed · 3 months ago

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Checkmate

Pairing: Eris x female!Reader

Summary: You are playing chess against Lucien, and it's getting late.

Word count: 660 words

Warnings: None

Dividers made by @tsunami-of-tears ❤️

Lucien Vanserra is a ruthless player when it comes to chess.

His moves are unpredictable and unsettling, leaving an opening only to pounce back on his opponent. He tricks them, hunts them down.

You knit your eyebrows as you watch him move his pawn forward, leaving his queen exposed to your bishop.

“The hells are you trying to do here…” You mutter under your breath, looking up to your brother in law’s relaxed face.

He tilts his head to the side, a feline grin creeping up his face as he slouches into his seat. “Come on, Y/N. Try something.”

“I think this game as been going on for long enough, brother,” Eris grumbles from the loveseat couch. He stretches like a lazy cat, then places a bookmark in his book before setting it down on the coffee table. “Come to bed now, my heart.”

“I’m not tired yet!” You speak behind your hand, trying to stifle a yawn.

Eris gives you a knowing look, then stands up from his seat.

He walks the few steps separating you then scoops you up into his arms without acknowledging Lucien’s presence for one second.

“We weren’t done playing!” Lucien whines, standing up as to stop Eris from taking his source of entertainment away.

“You, go back to your own female. I reckon you still have some mate stuff to figure out, brother.”

Lucien swears and blushes madly as Eris winnows out of the drawing room, leaving him behind with an unfinished chess game and the crackling fire living in the hearth. He had been courting his mate, Elain Archeron, for years now. It is fair to say that his rate of success with her as been miserable, compared to his prodigious success with chess.

—

The familiar scent of incense and something spicy, cinamon, perhaps, welcomed you as the room falls into place.

Eris–yet to let your feet touch the ground– sighs as he makes his way to your matrimonial bed. Gently, as if you’re made of porcelain, he lays you atop of it.

His deft finger easily win the fight against the multiple ties and claps securing your corset onto your body, and the relief you feel as it releases you is so intense that your eyes nearly roll at the back of your head.

“No thank you for saving your pretty ass today, my darling mate?” Eris smiles down at you, your ankle lazily resting on his shoulder as he undoes the laces of your chic leather boots.

“Mmmh? When?” The question almost sounds like a purr, your eyes already dropping from sheer exhaustion as you let your mate ready you for bed.

“With Lucien.”

“All you did, my love,” You grunt as you lift yourself on your shoulders, “Was ruin my fun.”

Eris scoffs, letting your leg fall before reaching down to hook the other one above his shoulder, getting rid of your other boot. “Oh, absolutely. You were having so much fun losing,” He ticks his tongue, a sly grin on his lips. His fingers are massaging your calf to keep you quiet and content while he speaks. “If you had attacked his queen with your bishop, his king would’ve attacked it back. It would’ve left you with only your king, a bishop, and some pawn to finish this game. You were screwed, and bound to lose.”

He sighs, shaking his head as he puts your leg down, crawling up between your legs to rest his body atop of yours. His lips find the sharp curve of your jaw, nipping at the skin as you grumble instead of assuming that, yes, he is right. “Your game was terrible, my heart.”

“Shut up…”

“Such kind words.” He teases back.

You get rid of the extra layers of clothing remaining on your bodies in silence, then without another word, only loving kisses, the two of you slide under the soft bedsheets and fall asleep in the safety of each other’s arms.

Eris Vanserra taglist:

ACOTAR general taglist: @mybestfriendmademe @lilah-asteria @acotar-lover @paige0103 @princesssunderworld

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elainsgirl · 3 months ago

Note

I'll always say this. Gwynriels do not understand Azriel's character.

haha you know their understanding of Azriels character is bad when even I - someone who doesn’t like Az - steps in to defend him.

Gwynriels: “Azriel is a toxic, incel man that has white knight syndrome and feels unworthy yet entitled and possesive at the same time - he is only using Elain, and will drop her the minute he finds his mate which he desperately wants so badly, he’s careless and mean, only wanting to do Elain and then discard her, he has so many issues he needs to sort through overall he’s disgusting and has a lot of growth to do.

Canon Azriel: respects women and is basically down bad for Elain, pining over her.

#elriel #Gwynriels wouldn’t know what Az in love looks like #save Az from them #And elain. And poor gwynnie #azriel acotar #azriel acosf #azriel shadowsinger #elain archeron

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serpentandlily · 1 year ago

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We Should Stick Together - Azriel x Reader

Summary: Azriel deals with the aftermath of losing his mate. (Part I)

Warnings: angst, death, self-harm

A/n: An epilogue of sorts to Birds of a Feather - Read HERE. Thanks for all your love!!

• ───────────────── •

I want you to stay

'Til I'm in the grave

'Til I rot away, dead and buried

'Til I'm in the casket you carry

• ───────────────── •

It was dead silent in the Temple. Many fae had come today to pay their respect and to honor the female that died during the war with Koschei—the female that had bravely lured the Death God to his demise and had ultimately met her own in the end.

Azriel had watched the service from the shadows, consumed by his shame and grief. Grief over losing his mate, his best friend, and the chance at a long life with her. Shame from not being able to protect her, from not realizing the mating bond between the two of them until it was far too late and for those last few words he had spoken to her that had only pushed her further into a suicide mission.

You just want me to continue being miserable. Because that’s always been why the two of us got along so well. Both lonely and so unhappy and now that I’m finally not, you want to drag me back down. Maybe one day someone will love you the way me and Elain love each other. But just because no one does right now, does not mean I have to give up my happiness to keep being miserable with you.

The words haunted him.

She haunted him.

Azriel had always been good at ruining his own life. But saying those words was single handedly the worst mistake he had ever made. He hadn't meant them. Of course he hadn't meant them. He loved Y/n. He had since the day he had met her. She was his closest friend—someone he had felt comfortable with. But he had been so blind...blinded by Mor and her vivacious personality...blinded by Elain and the sunshine she had brought to the Night Court.

All along his mate had been right by his side. The one person he had been searching for all his years of living had been right in front of him and he hadn't even noticed.

Azriel walked down the long aisle towards the casket that was displayed on the dais. His footsteps echoed in the now silent chamber—not even his own heart beat could be heard. No, his heart had stopped beating the second hers had.

He fiddled with the flower in his hand, swallowing the tears and sadness that threatened to consume him. He owed her this. He wasn't going to run and hide himself in the shadows as he'd been doing the past week. He needed to be here today.

Azriel finally stopped in front of the casket and choked on his own bile as the sweet, comforting scent of his mate reached his nose. This felt all too much like a nightmare—one he was stuck in with no way out. Cursed to repeat this day from beginning to end for the rest of his existence.

She would never stop haunting him.

And he didn't want her to.

If the ghost of her was the only thing left of his mate in this world, he would cling to it for the rest of his days.

Azriel placed the spirit lily on top of the casket, the glowing silver petals matched the marble stone. He had searched day and night to find this flower. It was your spirit lily. The one that had bloomed when you died.

"I'm so sorry," he cried, the tears finally falling. "I'm so sorry."

He fell to his knees before the casket, one scarred hand sliding along the cold marble as he continued to repeat those words over and over and over again.

"I am so sorry."

• ───────────────── •

If you go, I'm going too,

'Cause it was always you, alright

And if I'm turning blue, please don't save me

Nothing left to lose without my baby

• ───────────────── •

Azriel's ears were ringing as he sat at the kitchen table in the cottage that Elain and he had purchased a few weeks before their wedding. It was the first time he had stepped inside since the war with Koschei. It was the first time he'd even been in the Night Court since the loss of his mate and best friend.

"I understand that you need time to process this, Azriel, I really do," Elain pleaded with him. "But we made vows to each other the day we married. Vows that were supposed to transcend any mating bond."

Azriel's shadows wailed from the corners of the room. They had started searching for Y/n the day she died and hadn't stopped their cries of panic since then.

It had been a month already.

A whole, entire month had passed by without you.

And here he was—dark circles lining his eyes, stubble on his hollowed jaw and a song he'd never hear again playing on repeat in his mind. His mating song. His soul's song. His soul that was desperately crying out for its other half.

"I can't do this, Elain," he spoke, voice hoarse from disuse. "I'm sorry."

"That's it? That's all you have to say?" Elain questioned, crossing her arms and leaning on the kitchen counter. "Azriel, I rejected my own mate for you. I...I thought we were in this together. We talked about the day you might find your own and we agreed that you'd reject it too."

"I know," Azriel whispered, his forlorn eyes stuck on the cracks on the floor. "But I didn't know what I was giving up the day we made those vows, Elain. I'm sorry. I truly am. But this...this is different. Lucien was a stranger to you. I thought if I ever met my mate, she'd be a stranger to me as well. But Y/n was my best friend. I've loved her for centuries."

"All that time together and yet, you still never went after her," Elain argued.

Those words landed a heavy blow in his gut. Elain was right. He had known his mate for years and years and never once did he think of her as anything more than a friend. But that wasn't because of her. No, he had done that to himself.

He had found a companion with Y/n. She saw him in ways no one else did. He'd be lying if he said that hadn't scared him. For someone to see through him—through all the good and to the rotting, decaying bad that existed in him. He was a monster hiding in plain sight and she had seen that. She had seen all of that and loved him anyway.

And he had ran from it—from her. It was his own self-hatred that caused him to never see Y/n that way. She reminded him of everything that he was because she was all the same. She was the missing piece to his broken soul. But she had been beautiful in her darkness, hauntingly exquisite in her shadows. And he had been a brutish beast who thought that someone could vanquish the darkness that surrounded him.

What he hadn't realized was that he was never looking for a light to cast the shadows away. Not really. He had been fighting a storm whose tides had only been trying to bring him home to her. To his mate. His soul and heart and mind.

And now she was gone and she had taken all of his love with her.

Azriel stood from his seat, barely present in this reality. "I'm sorry, Elain. No words will change my mind nor my heart. I belonged to Y/n. It is only my fault that I never saw that."

And it was his fault.

All of it was his fault.

• ───────────────── •

And I don't know what I'm crying for

I don't think I could love you more

It might not be long, but baby, I

I'll love you 'til the day that I die

• ───────────────── •

"Papa, who is that?"

Nyx's innocent voice caught Rhysand's attention. He followed Nyx's gaze to the corner of the room where Azriel stood, wreathed in his shadows. It had been years since any of them had laid eyes on the elusive shadowsinger. Years since he had been so consumed with his grief that he had disappeared from this court, from Prythian entirely.

But there was one day he always returned.

The anniversary of Y/n's death.

Cassian had ambushed him before he made it to her gravesite and all but dragged him to this family dinner. It broke Rhysand's heart that his son didn't recognize one of his uncles.

"That's Azriel," Rhysand answered, clearing his throat. "He's one of your uncles. He used to be around a lot when you were just a baby."

"Oh," Nyx said, tilting his head as he looked at the shadowsinger. "He seems...sad. Why is he so sad, Papa?"

Rhysand's heart snapped in his chest. The loss of Y/n had been felt by all of them, of course. But for Azriel...it had destroyed him. None of them had known about the mating bond between the two of them. They had been caught off guard just as much as Azriel had been. Rhys had felt an inkling that she might've been in love with him due to her slowly distancing herself once he and Elain had gone public with their relationship.

He had only thought she needed space and time. He hadn't realized that she had been slowly wilting away. And no one had done a single thing to help her. They had all failed her.

Sometimes he felt a fire-burning rage towards his brother. He had tried to steer him away from Elain that Solstice night but Azriel hadn't listened to him. Perhaps if he had, Y/n might still be here. Perhaps the mating bond would've finally snapped in place for Azriel. But instead he had stubbornly doubled-down on his feelings for Elain.

"He lost someone he loved," Rhys choked out. "We all did. Do you remember the stories about Y/n?"

Nyx clapped his tiny hands together with a smile. Gwyn had made sure that Y/n's name had been honored and recorded in the new books about the war with Koschei. A story that was being passed down through the years. A story Nyx had read time and time again because it was his favorite.

"She was the warrior who faced a Death God all on her own!" Nyx exclaimed. "She led him straight to the trap where he was ambushed!"

Rhysand smiled, patting his son on the head. It had been too hard to speak her name after her death but slowly, they had all started talking about her more and more. Perhaps it was finally time to tell his son the whole story. Rhys glanced at Azriel again, who was a shell of his former self. Perhaps not the whole story.

"Well, before all of that," Rhys started, "Y/n was our friend..."

• ───────────────── •

Birds of a feather, we should stick together, I know

I said I'd never think I wasn't better alone

Can't change the weather, might not be forever

But if it's forever, it's even better

• ───────────────── •

Azriel was kneeling on the grass, his hands grasping the beautiful stone marker of your gravesite as his eyes combed over the engraving:

Here lies Y/n

Beloved Daughter, Sister and Friend

The stars will shine brighter with you among them

Rest in Peace

"I have tried to go on for your sake," Azriel murmured. "Because I know that is what you would've wanted. But I can't...I can't do this without you. I relive every day I've shared with you and it is still not enough to make me miss you any less. I am sorry that it took your death to make me realize just how much you meant to me."

Azriel had gone through it all in his head time and time again. Always reliving moments where he could've seen what was right in front of him all along yet didn't. Your last words to him constantly looped in his mind.

"I'll find...you...again. Maybe...maybe I'll be...good enough...then."

Those words could not be more untrue. It was always him who had never been good enough for you. Not you. Never you. You had always been as beautiful as the moon reflected on the sea, alluring and mysterious but peaceful. So peaceful. Despite the darkness the two of you shared, you'd always been so soft and kind to those around you...those who had never felt the kind of pain you'd gone through.

You lured people in because of your grace. You gave people a safe place to exist in. Your shadows had felt like a warm blanket on a chilly night. Your smile had rivaled the moonlight.

You had always been far more special than you knew.

Your mistake had been thinking you could out love his hatred for himself.

But the mating bond had opened his eyes. Although he had only gotten a few seconds with his mate, its song had told him everything he needed to know. He no longer hated his shadows or the anger he felt inside. He no longer hated himself. How could he? How could he hate himself when part of him was you?

And he could never hate you.

Gods, he could never be without you. Your souls were intertwined.

But living in this world without you was something he could not bear. He was consumed by your memory. He looked for you in everything. In the sea, in the breeze, in the faces of random people, down alleyways and behind every door. But you were not here. You were not here and so he decided he could not be here, either.

"You said you'd find me again," Azriel whispered. "You said you'd find me again but that is not enough. I cannot sit here and wait for you. I will crawl through Hell and everything that is ready for me when my life ends to find you. This life means nothing to me without you in it. You were my heart, Y/n. I love you. I've always loved you. And I am ready to prove that in our next life."

Azriel slid Truth-teller from its sheath and turned it over in his hand, pointing the blade directly as his own heart. He closed his eyes, tuned out all noise except that of the leaves gently rustling in the breeze.

"I love you, Y/n," he murmured, gripping the blade tighter. "And I can't wait to see you again."

His dagger pierced through skin and bone until it reached his heart.

Until all life was spilled from inside of him.

Until his final breath carried with the wind.

Until he could finally see his love again.

• ───────────────── •

I knew you in another life

You had that same look in your eyes

I love you, don't act so surprised

#acotar #acotar fanfiction #acotar x reader #acotar x you #azriel #azriel x reader #azriel x you #azriel shadowsinger #azriel fanfic #azriel acotar #azriel angst #acotar fanfic #shadowsinger x reader #Spotify

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bookwormjust · 5 months ago

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Peeling Oranges and Guarded Hearts : Small Acts of Love in the River House

(Azriel x mate reader)

The late afternoon sunlight poured into the River House, illuminating the cozy living room where you, Elain, Feyre, and Nesta were sitting. Elain, as usual, was soft-spoken but smiling as she admitted,

“I love oranges, but I hate peeling them. Those little white bits always get stuck under my nails.”

You smiled at her, already rising from your seat. “I can peel it for you, Elain. No problem.”

Elain’s eyes lit up with gratitude. “Oh, thank you! You’re so sweet.”

With a warm laugh, you made your way to the kitchen where the males were gathered, deep in discussion. Azriel was perched on a stool, his sharp eyes scanning a piece of parchment, while Rhysand leaned casually against the counter, and Cassian gestured animatedly as he spoke. Lucien stood nearby, listening with a small smirk. As you entered, the room’s energy shifted slightly, the males pausing in their conversation to glance your way.

“I’m peeling an orange for Elain,” you announced with a smile, holding up the fruit. “Does anyone else want one while I’m at it?”

Cassian was the first to respond, grinning widely. “If you’re offering, I’ll take one! But only if you peel it for me too—I’m lazy.” You rolled your eyes playfully. “Of course you are.”

Rhysand raised an elegant brow, his violet eyes twinkling. “I wouldn’t say no to an orange, either. But don’t feel obligated to spoil us all.”

Lucien, standing near the fruit bowl, chuckled. “I can peel my own, thanks.”

Azriel didn’t say anything immediately, but his gaze softened as he watched you move toward the counter to grab a knife. As you began peeling the orange with careful precision, your hands deftly removing the white pith, you glanced over your shoulder. “Az, what about you? Want one too?” His lips curved into a faint smile, his shadows curling lazily around his shoulders. “I’ll have one, but only if it’s not too much trouble.” You laughed softly. “It’s no trouble at all.”

Cassian leaned against the counter, smirking. “Look at that, Az. You’re being pampered.” “Jealous?” Azriel asked dryly, though there was a hint of amusement in his tone. As you finished peeling the first orange, you handed it to Cassian with a mock-serious expression. “Here’s yours, my lord.” Cassian clutched it dramatically to his chest. “Bless you. You’re too kind to us.” You shook your head, smiling as you started on the next orange. Once you’d finished peeling, you distributed them to Rhysand and Azriel, saving the last for Elain. “Thanks,” Rhysand said, his tone teasing. “I’ll make sure Feyre hears about how well you’re taking care of everyone.”

Azriel didn’t say much, but when you handed him his orange, his fingers brushed against yours briefly, his hazel eyes meeting yours with quiet gratitude. “Thank you,” he murmured. “Anytime,” you replied, your smile soft. As you headed back to the living room with Elain’s orange, you couldn’t help but hear Cassian’s voice behind you. “She’s a saint. Az, you better hold onto her.” Azriel’s response was quiet but firm. “Always.”

#acotar x reader #acotar #acotar reader imagine #azriel x female!reader #azriel x reader #azriel x oc #azriel x you #azriel fanfic

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mxtantrights · 1 month ago

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WORLDS APART

Azriel just wanted to make it back home. To Velaris. If he could just make it out of the woods, find some shelter, he could do it. He could rest for a while and then winnow out of the human lands.

The arrow wounds that litter his back and stomach weren't that bad.

But then again, he is a bit of a masochist. To anyone else it would be bad. Maybe mortally so.

He's been through worse.

He just needs to--

Azriel falls to his knees, the hard soil beneath him. His eyes roll back as he passes out from exhaustion and the lack of adrenaline running through his veins. The last thing he remembers is the sound of a branch snapping somewhere behind him.

-----

You come up on the huddled body in the woods on your way home. With the wicker basket full of fruits and fresh bread hanging around your arm and your cat following behind you.

The massive black heap stops you.

You look around first. Strange things happen in these woods all the time. Which is why you live in them. It's better this way.

There's a few moments that pass after that. You try to see from the far distance you're at if the body is moving. Once you realize that it's not you get closer and closer.

Wings.

Not a human. You put down the basket and run over to the body. Carefully you roll it over. A tall male, with wounds socking his clothes. Leathers.

He was fae, you think. Based on the wings that lay on his back. And the glowing blue pieces of rocks.

This is the moment you decide to save his life. You carefully rip the bottom of your skirt into a long piece. Then you tie around his side. The blood keeps coming.

You then carefully flip him towards his front. Figuring it would be better to drag him on his front than on his back and mess up his wings. You grunt and sweat as you bring the heavy man into your cottage.

-----

Azriel wakes up in a daze. His eyelids feel heavy. Like he can't properly open them or get the sleep out of them. Everything around him is blurry and his senses are dimmed. His hearing is a bit muted too.

Which is why he doesn't flinch or notice when you come into view.

He thinks he's dying. That's the only way any of this makes sense. You come into view with your coils framing your face and soft smile on your lips. An angel for his last moments.

He's always wondered who he'd see in his last moments. Would it be his mother? Maybe Elaine, even though he can't admit that out loud. Or Gwyn. Or Mor. Both of which he also can't admit out loud.

But you, you're different. He thought he'd see someone he knew. But he doesn't know who you are. He's never seen your face before. He would know it. He would remember.

The warm light from beside you sharpens your features. The plump of your lips. The brown of your eyes. The brilliant reflection of your teeth from your smile.

And he doesn't know it, but Azriel lets the sleep take him. He does so with a smile on his face.

-----

You dunk the cloth into the water and silently clean the wounds. He has been improving slightly. Thankfully he hadn't hurt his wings, because you knew nothing about healing in that area.

A fae in your neck of the woods.

What was he doing here? Was he alone?

You hadn't seen many fae with wings though. Sure, you hadn't seen many fae in your life but this is new. And his ears weren't pointed. Maybe he's a crossbreed? Part fae and something else?

You look over him once more. Stopping your movements with your hand.

The sharp lines of his jaw. The slope of his nose. The thick eyelashes. And his hands. You had wondered about them for days now. Who did such a thing to him? Did he deserve it?

A sharp meow from behind you startles you from your thoughts. You turn around in a rush. Your cat, Felix, is looking at you like you've got three heads.

"Oh hush, I'm just helping him." you say.

He meows again.

"I already left you food to eat. You don't have to watch me." you quip.

Felix sashays away from you with all the sass of an old man. You turn back to the body of the man in front of you. In your mind you're remembering how a a night ago he had woken up and looked right at you. Then fell right back to sleep with a smile on his face.

You resume wiping at his wounds.

-----

Azriel wakes up with a start. He can see and hear very clearly now. Like all of his senses have returned. He takes in his surroundings. He's laying on the floor, in a heap of blankets, a fire place smoking out beside him.

"Hello?" he asks.

But there is no response. He moves his legs, ready to stand, but feels the extent of his injuries. He looks down at his side. He's wrapped up.

Someone helped him.

With a grimace he gets up from the floor. It's then he sees a chair near the door. His leathers are folded up neatly. He looks down quickly at his legs. He's wearing pants. He sighs in relief.

All of a sudden it's like his duties come washing over him. The mission. He needs to get back home.

His actions are fast. He pulls his leathers on, with a few grunts and winces, but he pulls them on nonetheless. He looks around the strange place once more before he winnows out.

Back home.

Well, into Rhys' office. Who is seemingly waiting for him.

Rhys has his back turned to him, he's staring out of the window. His hands tucked behind his back.

"I was wondering when you'd-" Rhys' words stop as soon as he turns and sees Azriel.

"I got the information." Azriel says.

"You got hurt." Rhys says.

"I'm not anymore. I'm healing."

"And how exactly is that?" Rhys asks.

Azriel can feel his face go warm. He doesn't have all the facts. He doesn't really know anything. All he has is your face. Not even a name to call his savior.

"I'm still not sure."

-----

The woods had been your home for a long time. But if a wounded fae walked though them, it was only a matter of time before more and more mythical creatures did.

It's not like you have a bias against them. You are one yourself. And that is the reason why you had to abandon the cottage. If any of the humans came looking and found you, you'd be in trouble.

You hammer the nail over the plank of wood. Sealing the last window from the inside out. If someone were to come back here, they would find a vacant home. No personal items left behind. It was almost like you haven't lived here for years.

What would be your new home?

Further inland, closer to The Wall, is a community of people that wouldn't look you over twice. You happen to fit in with humans quite well. It's only when you started to do magic that you gave up your real identity.

So that's where you'll go.

You peek inside of the wicker basket to find Felix fast asleep. All these years and he's been by your side since you were little. You can't imagine doing any of this alone.

With nothing else to say you start your trek.

-----

Azriel knocks on the door twice. He can hear Rhys from beyond the door telling him to come inside. He opens the door and finds Feyre with him. He wasn't expecting that.

"Hello brother." Rhys says.

"Brother, Feyre. What's going on?" Azriel asks.

Rhys shrugs his shoulders, "Oh nothing. I was just telling my dear wife here that you'd fallen in love with your healer."

Azriel balks at that. He had never used those words. He hadn't even said anything about you to anyone. Of course Rhys does peek around in his head sometimes after missions.

"Don't worry. I won't tell anyone." Feyre smiles.

"I'm not in love. I don't even know who she is." Azriel replies.

"So why don't you go find out?" Rhys asks.

Azriel looks at him in confusion.

"Brother, I know you think it impossible that love would find you. But I think you were proven wrong. I think you have to find out who this woman is." Rhys continues.

"Maybe just start with a thanks for saving your life." Feyre added on.

Azriel clears his throat, "A thank you."

"Yes, then ask her out." Rhys jokes.

"I don't want to scare her." Azriel says.

"I don't think you could. I mean, she saved your life remember?" Feyre responds in kind.

-----

The water felt nice and warm in your hand. You close your eyes and try to think calm thoughts. Being in a new place is overwhelming. You aren't used to the people here.

They are secluded. Hardly talk. And when they do the rumor mill churns. Their questions came as soon as you arrived. Where did you come from? Why are you here? When will you leave?

Of course no one could ask these to your face. But they did whisper. Loudly.

"You should watch yourself." a voice says from behind you.

You retract your hand from the water and turn around. Standing a few feet away from you is a man. Tall, long red hair. He doesn't look human.

"Why?" you ask.

"Humans shouldn't play in the water. All kinds of creatures in there." he answers.

You tilt your head to the side. Then you smile.

"How do you know I'm not the creature in the water?" you ask in return.

He seems perplexed by your words. So much so that he walks closer to you. It makes you stand up, so that you can greet him. From this close you can tell for sure he's not human.

The tip of his ears that peak through that luscious head head of hair. And his eye. One of them is real and the other isn't. It's mechanical.

"What are you?" he asks.

"I mean no trouble." you answer.

"I know you don't, but the humans here might. You should rethink staying here." he says.

"And where would I go?" you ask, not really looking for an answer.

"I could set you up in a place. It would be safe. You wouldn't have to worry about the humans."

You take a moment. Not that you were really thinking about taking him up on his offer. You didn't know him. And you had been living along for years. You weren't about to give that up.

But taking a risk with the humans was just that, a risk.

"Who would I have to worry about?" you ask.

-----

Azriel winnows to the place he left and he's disparaged. The cottage is boarded up. He uses his strength to take some of the boards down and peek inside. It's empty, as if no one lived here.

Had he dreamed you up?

No. You had been real. He knows it. He's sure of it.

Another thing he's sure of? he's not going to find you. He shakes his head and looks around the woods. The sound of the dry leaves rusting in the wind.

What happened here?

As if feeling some strange pull he looks toward the door. At the wooden planks that criss cross on top of it. He walks over to it slowly, trying to find something, anything that could lead him to you.

"What kind of secret mission is this?"

He whirls around to find Cassian behind him. He scoffs. It's on him for thinking that Cassian of all people wouldn't be interested in what he's up to.

"It's not a mission." Azriel answers.

"Sure seems like it. I mean, human lands? Not a very fun place for us." Cassian comments.

"I'm looking for someone." Azriel relents.

"Looks like they packed up and left town."

"No shit."

"Fiesty. Okay. I'm just gonna head back home." Cassian points behind him.

Azriel sighs, "Sorry. I just, need to find her."

Cassian makes a face. His eyebrows shoot up on his face. And his lips form a stupid grin.

"Well maybe you can track her. Got anything of hers?"

Azriel reaches into the pocket of his leather pants. The makeshift bandage. He had kept it while Madja checked him out. More like sneakily picked it up from the floor and took it to his room to keep.

At once his shadows swirled around the blood soaked cloth. Then they crept up to his ear. And they whispered to him where he should be looking next.

"The Spring Court." he said out loud/

And something else. Something he couldn't say out loud. Because it seemed highly unlikely.

-----

You brush Felix's fur over and over. You're ruminating. Maybe you should just ask him. Lucien has been nice to you ever since you've met. You doubt he would just turn you down.

"What type of fae have wings?" you ask.

He looks up at you from his crouched position near the river. It earns him a splash of water from one of the nymphs. He gets up and walks over to where you are seated on a blanket.

"You've met an Illyrian?"

"I don't know are they the kind of fae that have wings?" you ask again.

He rolls his eyes, "Yes. Where did you meet one?"

You shrug your shoulders, "Out in the woods of the human lands. he was hurt."

Lucien's eyes squint at you.

"And you helped him?"

"Well I wasn't going to let him die. I just want to know if he is okay." you respond.

It had been weighing on your more and more since you left him alone in your cottage that morning. You thought he might stick around and thank you. Or maybe that he would stick around and kill you.

"What's his name?" Lucien asks.

"I didn't quite have the time to ask him since he was unconscious almost the whole time." you quip.

"Okay then what'd he look like?"

"Brown eyes. Black hair. Tall. Wings. He wore all black, leathers. And his hands were..." you trail off.

"Oh you liked his hands?" Lucien jokes.

"No it's not that. It just that they were scared. Like he got burned."

"Cauldron boil me."

-----

He'd been in a crappy mood since the trail went cold in the Spring Court. He had to keep what he was doing a secret. If Rhys knew he was searching around the Spring Court he would be reprimanded.

That is enemy territory.

But Cassian knows. Which means it's only a matter of time before Nesta knows and then Feyre, and then Rhys.

He's screwed.

Family dinner has been especially difficult. Azriel has been waiting for Cassian to slip up. So much so that he doesn't realize the trail of bread crumbs he's been leaving himself.

"So what's the name of the female you're fucking?" Amren asks.

Mor and Elaine spit out their drinks. Cassian snickers to himself, as much as he can really. Nesta looks right at Azriel. So does Feyre and Rhysand.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Azriel grits out.

"You reek of Spring. So I figure you're not there on a diplomatic mission." Amren explains her question.

"You do smell like fresh grass. I caught a whiff of it during training." Mor comments.

"Hey maybe just leave it alone." Cassian bites in.

Nesta turns to him at once, "You know something?"

Azriel can see him writhing in his chair. Mother, he'd have to tell all of them now. Not all of it but some of it. Just to placate them. Seeing Cassian twist in the wind is not that funny. It's hard to watch.

"I'm looking for someone. I owe them a thanks." Azriel answers.

Amren smirks, "As in verbally or in bed?"

At that, Azriel can feel his cheeks start to warm up. He looks away from the table as he knows they're probably turning red.

"Alright alright, enough. I think we should let Azriel tell us in his own time." Rhys speaks up.

Azriel nods once. Thankful for his brother in this moment. He goes to reach for his cup but there's a sudden wind. It knocks it down. It knocks all the cups down.

Before any of them can ask what the hell is going on, a darkness appears. Over the table. Someone is trying to winnow into he dinning room. Azriel takes out his blade. Cassian gets up from the table, his chair scratching the floor.

He makes out Lucien first. So he stands down. But he's setting something down on the table. No not, something a body. It materializes as the darkness subsides.

There laying out on the hard wood of the table, is you. Your hair crowning your head like a halo. Your eyes closed, in pain.

He takes in your state. You're wearing a thin green dress. And blood is pooling from your neck and chest. A slight gash on your head. He can feel the anger roaring to life inside of him. His heart is racing. He can't think straight.

And this is the only reason that he shouts.

"What the hell happened to my mate?!"

#acotar x reader #azriel x reader #azriel imagine #azriel #acotar

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