#Some of us just literally cannot be in that hole with you without falling back into our own fucking hole

[dangerous-disposition]

I think deliberately ignoring and spurning any attempts friends make to speak to you and then claiming no one cares about you when they move on isn't depression babe, thats you being a cunt. hope this helps

[anantaru]

⚝ DAY 2 — POWER IMBALANCE

kinktober 2024. — masterlist | ao3

— including. — blade, jing yuan, aventurine

— warnings. — fem! reader, power imbalance, oral (fem! receiving), toxic & manipulation, hard syx, dom/sub

⚝ — BLADE

blade feels to you like a storm, his grip on you endlessly overwhelming yet not because he's forcing it on you, no, but because his dependence on you was suffocating.

the stellaron hunter was dangerous, you were very much aware of it, although never pondering on the fact that you were playing with fire here.

his cock slides in between your folds before slipping to your hole, right then, you can feel the hot push of his tip, slow at first, but persistent, burning and stretching you. blade opens you up as you clutch at his shoulders each time, you're certain you can take him, you can't— it won't fit—such always crosses your mind but, you see, your skin was burning and hungry, submitting to him, to his cock sliding in fully— so smooth on your walls, thick inside, searing.

blade clings to you like you’re the only thing tethering him to sanity, and well— maybe you were, he certainly looks at you with an intensity that borders on desperation, a string he needed to hold on to if he wanted to keep at least a little bit of humanity inside himself or else, he’d fall apart.

"you ground me," he murmurs, voice low, his hand searching for your own as he grips it a little too tightly— his neediness haunting as he slumps forward, still thrusting hungry shoves of his cock into you as the rhythm changes just a little, but the pressure was increasing, becoming more meaningful.

in this rare moments, the way his hands tremble slightly when he brushes your hair behind your ear, there’s a tenderness, yes, but you cannot shake off the feeling of being scared of him— were his words the truth? did he mean what he said? would he hurt you in the end or are you really the one to put a light in his dark, twisted world?

⚝ — JING YUAN

jing yuan was always in control, his charm making each and every friend or foe bend to his will effortlessly— and well, you’re no exception. 

frankly, he's used to people following his lead without question, without turning on their own brains, his words were so fittingly persuasive that you barely even notice when you started agreeing with everything he said.

you whine out a breathy, "fuck, more—" as he laps at your clit, the vibrations of his hums and groans making you arch your back into him— you're so sensitive, jing yuan makes you feel all of it with his tongue, all the nerves down there and how muscle slurped and licked a stripe along your slit to tease you, shamelessly moaning against your pussy right after.

"i’m only looking out for you," he lazily mumbles into your cunt, "I know what's ugh—, what's best for you," his fucked out grin disarms you completely as you look down, admiring the view of his hands, big hands, clutching at your trembling thighs before he gives your stomach an anticipatory twist.

he's not forceful though, don't misunderstand, yeah? because simply, jing yuan doesn’t need to be, his self assured confidence made it feel like any resistance would be literally ridiculous. 

after all, his charisma pulls you in, his beauty and face being chocolate box pretty, ethereal and powerful, leaving you wanting to please him too, so badly yeah, to stay on his good side.

⚝ — AVENTURINE

from the outside, aventurine was unable to be read— and even once you got close to him, you found yourself having more difficulties reading him.

his standards were impossibly high, that's for sure, and he never hesitates to point out when you fall short. for some reason he critiques everything you do, from the way you handle the tasks he's given you to your smallest habits, never failing in exhaustedly rolling his eyes with an edge of frustration.

however, wasn't it just amazing how he was always there to clean up the "mess" you made in getting all the tasks wrong, or anything really.

something unmistakable random could happen in your life, even just a favorite item you suddenly lost and aventurine would always be there to help you— like a white knight.

of course, you cannot question him on anything, he was your superior and losing your job would be the last thing you wanted, next to losing the little relationship you've built over the last couple of months with him.

you feels it in your legs, your stomach, your hands, your soul when he touches you— pleasures you.

it's the desire overtaking you first, making you give yourself up entirely to the harsh rhythm of his hips displaying no mercy. aventurine hisses as you squeeze him, the faintness in his head almost making him swoon as your leg tremble and his cock throbs hard in you, the tremulous thrill inside your belly building to a merciless dance.

"i’ll be here, buried right here—" he hums and grinds his hips, his fingers drawing a line on your stomach, up and down, "feel that? you feel me there?"

"not that you, fuck— deserve it," he grunts, cupping your cheeks and brushing a thumb over your lips, "you made so many mistakes today," he breathes while staring down at his cock splitting your puffy cunt.

he adds, "you should be thankful i was there,"

an embarrassed, little sorry was all you managed to get out in return and ugh— the friction of him rubbing against your walls felt absolutely sickening, like you're about to cum and scream any second now.

©2024 anantaru do not repost, copy, translate, modify

[akisteahouse]

Thinking about parenting with Heartslabyul…

Synopsis: in home economics, you get randomly assigned to a partner to raise a ‘child’ - a robot baby meant to simulate a real infant’s needs. Things definitely get… interesting, to say the least.

Riddle Rosehearts!

knowing how he was raised, Riddle isn’t exactly the best parent figure - speaking to children as if they were fully grown adults, either too quickly or too slowly.

adamantly refusing the thought of naming the kid at first, because “Naming the robot is a risk far too large for me to take. The number of seniors that have failed this assignment due to growing attached to their supposed child…I absolutely cannot let this drag Heartslabyul’s dorm ranking down!”

he gives in after you give him puppy dog eyes.

“Rose is… an acceptable name."

work division wise, you’re unfortunately tasked with most of the first-hand child rearing things - feeding her, changing diapers, rocking her until she stopped fussing…

though, that doesn’t mean he doesn’t do his fair share of work.

all expenses are charged to him, as well as the assembly of the cot(which he spent at least five minutes scrutinising to check if it was safe) and pretty much all of the cleaning of the dirty laundry(how can such a small thing produce so much grime?)

somewhere along the line, you two work out an agreement where you take turns taking care of Rose.

whenever Riddle's the one taking care of her, he possesses one of those infinite mom bags as well as a baby carrier.

the only downside of this arrangement is that berating and punishing students are harder when it's his turn, because Rose isn't exactly fond of him raising his voice.

somehow teaches a literal perfect simulation of a child to follow all 810 of the Queen’s rules??? Yeah you don't question it either, just give her her tea when the time is right.

absolutely DID NOT sniffle when he had to give Rose back. >:*(

an overall decent partner, if you're fine with your robot kid having the divorced kid treatment.

Trey Clover!

names your kid something stupid, like Pistachio, for shits and giggles, all while feigning innocence.

“Pistachio's a cute name, isn't it?”, in between bouts of laughter.

a great partner - as the Oldest Child, he's pretty well-versed in taking care of kids younger than him, after all.

if only little Pistachio wasn't an absolute menace.

a fussy eater, non-stop tantrum thrower, and the type of slippery kid as in stop staring at him for two seconds and suddenly he's hanging on a laundry line.

but hey, at least Trey seems used to it!

He absolutely WILL NOT do the divorced parent arrangement - claiming that co-parenting is way easier, so congrats, you're moving into his dorm for a while!

assembles the cot in less than ten minutes, without even needing the manual. the true MVP.

pretty okay with soothing Pistachio, even if he's in the midst of class, waking up at midnight to feed the little shit, talking to him while pushing his pram…

teaches Pistachio how to speak and is SUCH a smug bastard when he says his name before yours - jerk. >:(

pretty calm throughout the return process, kinda just glad his parenting days are over. For now >:))))

a great guy to be assigned with, just don't let him name anything in the future.

Cater Diamond!

searches up ‘cute baby names’ on Magicam the minute you let him choose the kid's name, ends up with Sunny.

is… weirdly willing to take care of a baby?!

like full on watching tutorials online on how to rock a fussing baby, how to change diapers, how to feed one… before falling down the internet rabbit hole that is ‘wow, these things die easily.’

IS still the bbg in the relationship, sorry pookie, you're gonna have to assemble the cot yourself <333

fashions a pretty nice baby sling out of some spare cloth, and is never seen not holding the child for the rest of the week.

not willing to post ANY photos of Sunny on Magicam, like at all.

WILL make aesthetic Day in My Life vlogs of parenting her though, all while blurring out his precious baby's face.

doesn't really mind whatever arrangement you ask for, but preferably one where he doesn't let Sunny out of his sight, because look at her hands! They're so tiny!

adoring father #1, will impulsively buy way too many baby clothes for Sunny to the point where she'll be showing up in three different outfits a day.

grows absurdly attached to Sunny, has a full album in his phone dedicated to just photos of her.

full on near SOBBING on the day he has to return Sunny back to receive his grades.

can and will post a sad story on Magicam with his close friends list with purely just photos of Sunny with a cryptic message on top.

pretty good partner! you will have to deal with him showing up randomly to ask “Remember when Sunny -”

Ace Trappola!

another mf to name his kid after something dumb, if you let him.

thankfully, your child is not stuck with a horrendous name, after a back-and-forth bicker with Ace that goes on for far longer than it has to.

the two of you settle for Cherri, with an I, for no particular reason.

seems like a ‘agh, I hate my wife!’ Kinda guy, turns out to be a ‘happy wife, happy life,’ guy.

cocky mf who goes ‘psh, I don't need the manual’ before trying(and failing) to assemble the cot.

whines and complains about changing diapers or doing the laundry but does it anyway, will argue if you try to retract your statement and do the work instead.

another one that says he wants to do the divorced parents arrangement, folds to stay together instead. (Ace you're not slick.)

weirdly good at calming Cherri down??? just makes funny faces and tells awful jokes until she's giggling, before turning to you with a proud look on his face.

teaches Cherri how to play poker before teaching her how to talk.

‘You gotta prepare them early!’ He'd snickered. Before being wacked over the head seventy-two times. :)

WANTED to bring Cherri to basketball practice to show what a good parent he was (cough, cough, show off his cute little Cherri), but then remembered Floyd and was actually so concerned about him somehow squishing Cherri to death that he just left her in your hands instead.

another one who gets emotional when he has to give Cherri back.

“I am not crying! The classrooms just - hic! - dusty!”

a decent partner, just be prepared to be bickering with someone 24/7.

Deuce Spade!

is attached the minute he sees the kid, almost instantly tearing up.

probably names the kid after his first blastcycle or something, sorry Deuce. </3

the child is named Harley, and he is Deuce's pride and joy. (Well, at least for this week)

the second guy on this list to openly admit to not wanting the divorced parents arrangement! (Will gladly help you move your stuff in!)

another one who doesn't need the manual, and he really doesn't. assembles the cot pretty quickly.

absolutely whipped. need more diapers? okay, he'll run to Sam's shop and buy you some? Harley's fussing? give him a minute, and he'll be right there to help! Need a break? okay, he'll take Harley out for a stroll while you rest up!

adoring father #2

used to greet Harley by throwing him up in the air and catching him, before a concerned Cater walked up and told him that even a meter above the ground could cause brain damage, effectively scaring Deuce into holding Harley in general.

got probably the best behaved baby, with Harley being a literal angel - never fussing or crying, always giggly, okay with others holding him… Deuce couldn't be happier!

with Harley being so well behaved, both you and Deuce's schedule went as per usual - Deuce being able to go to class with a baby that never disrupted it, as well as to get the serotonin of looking at Harley's face during lessons.

cries when he has to return Harley. doesn't even try to hide it.

one of the best students to get paired with, though do expect to get emotionally crushed by the end of the week.

[celestiamour]

‧₊˚✧ ❛[ where he finds home ]❜

ft. logan howlett x f! reader — xmen, marvel

╰₊✧ you and your daughter have managed to fall into a comfortable pattern of life with logan by your sides, but your ex shows up one night to stir up some trouble and the wolverine isn’t having any of it┊2.9k words; prt one

setting: deadpool & wolverine (2024) worst! logan contains: hurt/comfort? mostly fluff, ooc logan probably, single mother reader with an unspecified age but still younger than logan, this chapter is mostly in your perspective, asshole exes, rushed ending what, but love confessions & getting together isn’t that cute

➤ author's note: alright, part two of the single mom! reader & her daughter!! the amount of support i’ve had on this was overwhelming, so sorry that this chapter isn’t on par with the first one, hopefully the next one will be better!

ever since that night, logan found himself rarely going a single day without interacting with you or your daughter. he can’t explain the force that seems to pull him towards the two of you, but he can easily realize that the sheer magnitude of it overpowered the little voice in the back of his head spewing pessimistic comments about how this couldn’t possibly end well just like everything else in his life did. his little made-up rule not to get attached is thrown out the window every time he sees either of you, reminding him that one simply cannot fight against the impossible no matter how much of a hardened killing machine he used to be. how could he try to avoid these feelings when they seemed to fill the hole in his heart until it was bursting at the seams with affection as if it was as easy as the apple pie you sometimes baked to share?

besides, even if he tried to hide this rapidly growing fondness, it’s not like anyone would have let him: not when wade keeps on offering to babysit while you’re at work, not when your baby has picked up the habit of running up to him to ask for hugs or to be picked up, not when you’re a sight for sore eyes as you follow up in the evening in your formal attire and pearls to pick her up, and especially not when althea keeps asking you when you two are getting married with the claim that she doesn’t need sight to see the chemistry happening at the dinner table. 

you’ll laugh and brush it off as the old lady watching too many romance films in her free time, but your cheeks are secretly burning in embarrassment at how literally everyone can tell that you’re crushing like a high schooler in your grown age except for the subject of your fancy. 

logan himself is pretty difficult to read, but thankfully, his roommates are open-book, blunt to a fault, and willing to tell you anything and everything you need to know whether or not you even asked. for example, they confirmed he did indeed have a soft spot for you and your daughter, one that made them howl with laughter as they bully him relentlessly for it (feel free to tell them that they shouldn’t because he’s just being nice, they aren’t going to listen to you). he tries his best to refrain from swearing within earshot, not even under his breath on the off-chance she will hear it and pick it up. he fixes his appearance whenever he knows he’ll see you in an attempt to look more approachable. he never cares to listen to the ongoing conversations about other friends, but he’ll lean in a little closer if it’s about you. he even buys toys or stuffed animals on occasion because he thinks of her when he sees them.

you probably shouldn’t be thinking about these things during such a busy moment of your life when you’re focused on raising your daughter, getting that job promotion in the bag, and finally agreeing to take your ex to court for him to take responsibility by paying child support. although he’s as kind as a man who is as gruff and rugged as he can be, he’s still an older man (both chronologically and biologically) who is a mutant superhero with powers you were still unaware of. it’s not you questioning if he’s safe to be around, it’s you questioning if it’s in his best interest to have a family with all that going on (especially if he wanted to play father to a toddler who had no blood relation to him. playing uncle is one thing, but father? you can never be sure).

still, you would be lying if you said that seeing him being so tender and sweet with your daughter didn’t stir up a domestic image in your mind. a girl could only dream, right? 

recently, he’s been showing up at your doorstep with a toolbox in hand every other day. you’ve been complaining lately about how nothing under your roof seems to work anymore and every time you inform the landlord, you get a half-assed job that falls apart within the span of a week: the pipes are leaking, the windows refuse to open, the gas stove won’t start, and there are also other things you never got around to fixing yourself like a wobbly desk or putting together a little bed for your baby since she’s outgrown her crib.

the conversations usually go a little something like:

“oh, you really don’t need to—”

“no, no, i insist— it’s not like i have anything better to do, and i’ll do a much better job than whatever the fuck those maintenance men have been doing anyways.” he’ll purse his lips at the unintentional curse word which slipped and then push past you. “anyway, which windows have been giving you trouble?”

it takes him an hour maximum to work his magic, always leaving behind something fully functional and stable enough to last for years. you’ll compliment his handy skills and try to push a wad of cash into his hands, but he refuses it every single time. you can’t match his stubborn personality for more than a few minutes, so you’ll sigh and offer him to stay for dinner instead because you refuse to let him go home empty-handed after helping you out so generously. 

while you’re busy rummaging through your pantry and fridge for ingredients to cook something of varying degrees of complexity each time, your daughter will make an appearance to keep logan occupied because you refuse to allow anyone to enter your kitchen ever since that incident with wade. yes, he is more careful and mature, no, you’re not taking any chances. 

tonight, she’s playing forcing him to play with an assortment of dolls. he’s never done this before, and it looks so awkward to see a grown-ass six-foot-two man holding a little blonde barbie limply in his hand without any idea what the setting is or the storyline or the characters supposed to be played, but your girl was smiling and cheerfully babbling something barely legible every time he played along so he wasn’t about to complain about it. 

you hummed a tune while slicing thin slices of beef, completely on autopilot and enjoying the night of peace. the doorbell suddenly rang throughout your apartment and you rushed to wash off your hands before wiping them off with a dishrag, assuming it was one of his roommates. who else could the unannounced visitor be at eight-thirty in the evening?

the smile on your face immediately dropped when you saw the unusually unkempt appearance of your ex-fiancé, reeking of booze with his hair sticking out a little past his ears and rough stubble lining his jaw. before you could even say something, he rudely pushed past you and stood in the center of the unfamiliar space. maybe it was for the best since he definitely would have caused a massive commotion in the hallway and disturbed the neighbors who didn’t need to be subjected to your personal issues. your daughter had fallen silent and stared at him in a mix of confusion and something else that was unreadable yet clearly not joyous in any way. 

the entire world seemed to stop for a moment as you held your breath in anticipation of his next move, wondering if he was going to be amiable or (more likely) stir some trouble to disturb the peace. your eyes met with logan’s and you shifted your gaze to the hallway entrance for a split second to signal him to bring your daughter into her bedroom, sparing her the scare that would come when her father would inevitably lash out. 

he understood immediately and picked her up in a single swift motion, “come on, bub, it’s time to go to bed.” his hand rested her head on his shoulder and she appeared to be okay, just wide-eyed with her thumb in her mouth, almost as if she could recognize the gravity of the situation despite barely being able to comprehend such things. 

“it’s only been a few months, and you’re already living with another man…:

“it’s actually almost been a year, but what are you even doing here? i thought you had a wedding to plan.”

“... wedding’s been canceled…”

“aw, really?” you could already tell where this was going. althea told you plenty of times that once he saw how much better you were doing without him while his life quickly tumbles down a slope, he would come crawling back. she made you promise on your life that you wouldn’t take him back no matter what, whether he begged on his knees promising he’ll be better or revealed he was the new ceo of amazon with riches beyond your imagination. you didn’t quite understand her concerns because the thought of it never crossed your mind once, but she just tutted and reminded you that love was unpredictable before revoking her statement when she remembered you wouldn’t get back together with your ex when the wolverine was on the table.

“she was seeing someone else…”

“well, well, well, you know what they say, ‘karma’s a bitch.’ it’s about time you got a taste of your own medicine, you cheating bastard.”

he took a step towards you and you flinched in response, making the other man standing in the shadows straighten his posture. he was never physically abusive, but you had no idea how he would behave under the influence. “you know she was the reason everything fell apart…”

“oh, don’t try to pin the blame on her when you were the one who was about to get married and you were the one who made the choice to abandon her family. good on her for leaving, and you should do the same.”

“do you ever think there would be anyone who would love you like i did? i was your first, and there isn’t anyone else who would take you as is. hell, i don’t even think the other guy will be around for much longer—”

“alright, i’ve had enough of this.” logan came forward from his spot in the shadows, getting closer to your ex until he was clearly intimidated by his looming figure and threatening aura. it’s the first time you’ve seen such a dangerous edge to him, yet strangely enough, you still felt safe knowing he was acting in your defense (if it was any other man, you probably would have kicked them both out before it could escalate). “get out of here.”

“can’t believe this,” he spat, turning his head to look back at you, “you bitch—”

he grunted at the insult, feeling more pissed off about it being directed at you rather than him, promptly throwing a punch into his face and gripping onto his collar before he could stumble over. an unfamiliar *schlikt* sound was heard before your eyes managed to process the long metal claws mere inches away from gouging out your ex’s eyes, making you gasp quietly in shock.

“okay! okay! i’m leaving!”

“i’ll escort you out,” he growled, still not letting go of him as he shoved him out of the door and closed it behind him, wanting to make sure that he would never come to bother you like this ever again and also drag him to apartment security to ensure they understood not to let him in ever again. 

then once he was gone, logan stood outside in the slight cold for a moment wondering what to do next. he just revealed his true nature to you that he’s been trying so hard to suppress: violent and animalistic. he should just prepare to hear you say that you are now scared of him, that you would prefer it if he didn’t come over anymore and to stay away from you and your daughter. 

the worst part is that he can’t even blame you, and a part of him feels like this was for the best. he was stupid to hope for a peaceful domestic with two human civilians when he was a mutant through and through. still, his heart drops at the thought of your eyes looking at him with fear rather than the usual caring, gentle look that made him forget all of his pain.

there was more impending doom weighing on him as he stalked up the stairs than there ever was for certain death missions.

his hyper-sensitive hearing easily picked up the sound of a baby crying, one that he immediately recognized as your daughter’s. he slowed his pace to hear you trying desperately to calm her down.

“oh, oh, shh, i know, i know,” you sighed, “god, logan, please hurry back…” he practically ran when he heard that, bursting through the door and rushing into the nursery which was in the process of being turned into a proper bedroom. there were slight tears pricking at your eyes when you looked at him, “sorry, can you put her to sleep? s-she won’t stop crying…”

“it’s okay, it’s okay, i got it,” he assured, taking her off your hands and soothingly patting her on the back, “please stop crying, you’re breaking your momma’s heart.”

after a minute or so, her high-pitched wails gradually quieted down, falling asleep in his strong arms and allowing him to place her in her little bed which was newly constructed by him just a few days ago. you led him out of the room, being careful not to make any sudden noises so as to not wake her again, and returned to the living room where it all started.

“i’m sorry you had to do all that,” you groaned, placing a palm on your forehead in a poor attempt to ease the forming headache. “i really don’t know what i would have done without you…”

“don’t apologize, i’m happy to help… but i completely understand if you don’t want to see me ever again…” he wasn’t sure why he brought it up when you didn’t even say anything about it, but perhaps he wanted to get the inevitable over with because this conversation would have happened sooner or later.

“what? why would i never want to see you again when you just saved me from my ex?” you asked, genuinely confused as you moved to pour out two glasses of wine and plopped down onto the couch with your head thrown back. “is it because of the claws? i don’t really care about that stuff— i mean wade runs around with at least one knife and gun on him at all times. besides, it’s not like you can’t control them, they only came out because you were trying to protect me…”

“well, yes, but—”

“logan, i really don’t care that you’re a mutant or a former killer or whatever— you’re a superhero who runs around in yellow spandex, fights evil, and is the only one who can get my daughter to sleep most of the time— i trust you.”

“... you do?”

“of course, i do,” you reach out and motion him to join you, leaning against his frame and feeling all of your stress dissipate at the contact. “i trust you with my life and you’ll always have a home here, i want you to know that..”

logan was silent for a moment, trying to remember the last time he heard words along those lines. “i don’t know if you mean that…”

“of course, i do, why wouldn’t i? although…”

“although?”

“i… i don’t think i could handle being just friends for much longer.” you cringed at your own words, sounding like a fucking teenager who was confessing to her first love. something straight out of a cheesy romance movie, or as deadpool would say, straight out of a fanfiction written by a lonely teenager who is trying to move the plot along and finish up. “god, that was so stupid—”

“well, no one said we had to be ‘just friends.’”

you looked at him ludicrously, “really? do you mean that?”

“i mean… if you’re okay with an old man who has adamantium claws in his knuckles…”

“are you okay with a lady who’s a single mom?”

“i think mine is a lot worse than that. sweetheart,” he chuckled, returning to the light-hearted tone. “so… does that mean i can kiss you?” 

you hummed, “of course, you can.”

even with your spoken consent, he still seemed a little hesitant when his hand found its way to the back of your head and he stared deeply into your eyes. his gaze was honestly a bit overwhelming since you’ve never seen anyone else look at you that way before, making you wonder if this was how to felt to be truly desired as a person.

you leaned forward to finish the kiss for him, a quick peck at first, then a deeper one that carried all of the bottled-up feelings from the previous few months. it wasn’t anything too crazy, yet it felt like your very first kiss all over again, clumsy and inexperienced. when you finally separated from him, you pressed your nose against his and giggled, “spend the night?”

“i thought you would never ask.”

tag list: @natsukitakama @fandomxo00 @wolflover-20 @dannsparrow @honestlysublimecherryblossom @acescutejeans-1247 @burkayyy @hotmesshobbit

[rodolfoparras]

we talk a lot about the characters being "loser boyfailures" and having no game and being rizless but think about the reader being that. guy in his thirties, no relationship ever, negative riz, absolutely no game, my man cannot speak to people without making 13 grammatical mistakes just an absolute pathetic wet dog vibes....

and the 141 boys could not want him more. they're absolutely head over heels for their loser boyfriend. i imagine Simon sees him bump into a chair and apologise to it and he's jumping his bones right then and there. pretty boy Kyle Gaz Garrick never goes anywhere without bringing his wet dog of a man with him. people are wondering how that happened and if he's blackmailing him, he gets very offended and sassy on his boyfriends behalf and when you're back home he rants to him about stupid people while milking his loser dick. Soap is just.... he's just himself the bigger the loser the more he wants the man. his boyfriend fucks up an interraction or fails at something and looks so wet and pathetic that he just has to put his dick in his mouth idk what to say Soap loves his loser boyfriends cock and when he tries and riz him up and falls flat on his face (literally and metaphorically) Soap just has to have him cream his hole im sorry but the man isn't letting his boyfriend go anywhere without having his mans loads in him. Price just loves him for the sincerity and how endearing his loser boyfriend is (just like an old man). the boyfriend will bring him coffee with a treat he tried making for Price and fuck up both the coffee and the treat but that old man will still praise you and give you kisses while his hand wanders bellow your waistband. with him Price gets to get rid of the anxiety of being too old to be useful because someone needs to make his boyfriend into a proper man. and when his boy does things right and suceeds Price rewards him by riding his phat loser cock for the whole night, milking load after load untill nothing comes out anymore

thanks for listening to the ramble i just want some love to the losers of society, there's too many perfect people in fics

Sugar!!!!!!! This is one of my favorite things I’ve ever read why do y’all leave these masterpieces in my inbox on anon you should post this sugar 🧎🏻‍♂️🧎🏻‍♂️

Especially the gaz and price part???

Imagine all eyes on Gaz in whatever room he walks in they barley notice you behind him but he’s always got a hand around your waist, gently nudging you forward and introducing you as his boyfriend to whoever’s there

He lets you take the stage just endearingly staring at you while you try to make conversation with whoever was eager to meet the two of you

And after you’re done you got a goofy smile on your face feeling happy that you managed to get through that conversation without fucking it up

And Gaz? He’s swiftly pulling you into a room crashing his lips against yours and it doesn’t take much before he’s riding your cock marking you up and feeling all possessive because yes this wonderful sweetheart is his boyfriend and he needs the world to know that

Or you, Price’s boyfriend feeling a bit insecure because Price has so much experience and you have none but he loves it, loves how you look at his old man body with such amazement love how eager you are to learn how to get him off, tears trickling down your cheek as you suck his cock, using your hands wherever your mouth can’t reach

Or you being careful as ever when you first fuck, asking him if he’s okay, if you’re hurting him all while he’s looking at you with the biggest smile on his face because bloody hell how did he get so lucky to have someone as sweet as you and he’s even more endeared when you’re swiftly apologizing because you came too quickly

[skittidyne]

Hii!! I hope you’re having a great day/night! I’m rereading bbac for the third time (I think this is one of the few select fanfics I have to read every few years just to relive the first time I read it) and I never tire from how in awe I always get with each chapter. When I found out you had turned it into an original story, I was (and still am) ecstatic!! I’ll have to find a way to get my hands on it ><! I hope it’s okay to still bring up bbac after— wow, nearly a decade since it first got published on ao3 O.O

Maybe you had answered a similar or the exact question before, and if you had, please do direct me there! If not, I just wanted to ask: How did you plan this entire story? The plot is so rich in mythology and horror elements, especially from various cultures and countries, and you weaved them so beautifully into a harmonious picture with your own take on magic and witchcraft. I had commented years ago in the middle of my first read that bbac is the reason why I’ve come to enjoy magic/fantasy as a genre in fiction, and I’ve been dipping my toes into them since as a media consumer and artist. However, there’s only so much input and output that could happen and I do get overwhelmed by the info I find. So it boggles my mind whenever I wonder how you wrote bbac because it flows so naturally, especially for readers who are not familiar with such elements (it’s me, I’m readers). It’s literally the perfect example of show, don’t tell without excessive exposition.

Have you always been interested in and inspired by myths, horror and etc? How much research did you do before/as you were writing? If you’re comfortable with sharing your methods, that is.

Thank you so much! ☆*:.｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆

first off, thank you!! it's so nice to receive something like this - words cannot describe the !!!! my heart did!

also, i'm SUPER gratified that bbac holds up to rereads!

don't tell me how long it's been tho

so waaaaay back when, i started bbac with 3.5 things in mind (spoilers for bbac endgame!): necromancer suga, stop the apocalypse plot, kiyoko being the one responsible for the final god, and ensemble cast. actually, in addition to the ensemble cast (believe it or not i hadn't written multiple subplots like that before!) i did specifically want to NOT spoonfeed information, so i very specifically withheld myself from doing so. and it means i succeeded in the show, don't tell, so yaaaaay

but seriously, as to how a huge project like bbac (and originale, now!) came to be... man. it was a lot of vibes, a lot of "what if XYZ, that'd be funny/cool", and some very cool friends i made along the way. also, alcohol. i don't recommend that part as much as i recommend the others.

it was very much a case of "this is cool!!" and throwing it all into a big mixing pot and shaking it. which is technically what all writing is, i just did it with highly concentrated tropes like "goopy shadow demon" and "angels are monsters, too".

i've always been a fan of fantasy setting with a big, worldwide-feeling scale, plus i was living in america (in several different places) writing fanfic about a japanese creation, so there was already incentive to do grabby hands at all kinds of mythologies. also, like many writers, i'm prone to falling down the research rabbit hole. whoops.

i HAVE always been interested in aesthetic horror, though it was only in the last decade or so that i have been able to actually watch horror movies. (i've been able to read horror forever!) i also enjoyed using lesser-known mythologies and delving further into more widely known ones (I WAS BASICALLY FLUENT IN R'LYEHIAN FOR WAY TOO LONG), but it was very much a case of research as i write. so very, very little was planned out from the start, because i'm not a planner.

bonus fun fact: i also originally thought bbac would be like 100k. ha. ha ha.

bbac was also a case in "what i DON'T want to write" - as an example, i very specifically wanted to NOT write werewolves and vampires! they're ubiquitous in fantasy already and i already wrote my werewolf fic so while i did mentally plot out where/how they'd fit into that world, i wanted to explore other things instead. and i did! for a lot of words!

in reworking the fic into an original series (please partake! ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿) i did also rework some of the mythologies i dug into. some were minor fixes, some were more major. (for example, there is no longer a skinwalker in originale, as it's not my place to use those and i don't know as much about navajo/dine as i ought to. but now there's 100% more old norse and 50% more lakota!) but the broad strokes of the plot are still the same. there is still a dragon migration. there is still the dreamlands. (HALF OF LOVECRAFT'S STUFF IS PUBLIC DOMAIN COME AT ME) the gods are new but there's still 3 of them. (or are there) there is, somehow, even more french.

in an ideal world, i also rework the notes i've taken into a creature compendium type thing and also publish it, because sometimes writers DO like telling in addition to the showing, haha.

[possessionisamyth]

Carlos won’t send nudes, and Leon respects that even if he does pout about it. But occasionally, Carlos will indulge Leon in some phone sex when one of them is away.

Carlos has plenty of toys to use and Leon loves hearing him, always makes him put the phone speaker down by his hole so he can hear how wet Carlos is.

“God, baby, please, wish I could see you, wish I was there, you sound so good, fuck –” Leon’s eyes are squeezed shut, picturing Carlos but it’s never as good as the real thing. He curses this stupid fucking mission for taking him away, all he wants right now is his cock in Carlos and his hands on his skin.

Carlos is a mess, fucking himself on two toys, and even though he himself isn’t very vocal the shlick, shlick, shlick sounds of the toys sliding in an out of him are plenty loud. 

They don’t have long, they never do with this type of thing, so soon enough they’re both spilling, Carlos onto the sheets beneath him and Leon onto his pants, as much as he tries to avoid it. (Carlos tries to keep from coming on his stomach when Leon isn’t there to clean it up, but some still gets on him and Leon has him collect what he can and suck it off his own fingers.)

They say their breathless goodbyes, and Carlos lays for a little bit longer before getting up to clean himself (it’s much less fun without Leon.)

When Leon does get home they’re both fucking insatiable. Once Leon has recovered enough he’s all over Carlos (he insisted on sucking Carlos off before he even rested, but Carlos made him wait to do anything else.) Pushing him against the wall, into the mattress, hands never leaving Carlos’s body. 

Carlos likes to struggle a bit, just to feel that Leon can actually overpower him, that he’s genuinely strong enough to manhandle him to where he wants. But eventually he goes pliant and moves easily, feeling so good he quite literally can’t think about pushing back.

If Leon wants to get fucked it has to be before he fucks Carlos, because once he has access to this mans hole he gets carried away immediately. That being said, Carlos loves fucking him, specifically in mating press so he can watch in awe at how easily Leon’s knees come up to his shoulders (his flexibility never stops making Carlos unreasonably horny.)

One of Leon’s favorite things is to fuck Carlos and come inside him before having Carlos sit on his face and eating him out. Leon eats ass like he’s starved and isn’t shy about how much Carlos’s smell turns him on.

They also have to work out separately if they actually want to get anything done, because the minute Leon smells the sweat and musk coming off of Carlos he cannot help himself. He spends an unreasonable amount of time (to Carlos, not him) just working his way down Carlos’s body, nuzzling his nose into anywhere he can and licking the sweat off his skin. He pays special attention to the hair on Carlos’s belly, rubbing his face into it with no shame.

Though they’re few and far between, sometimes Carlos lets Leon cockwarm him for long enough that they both fall asleep. Every time this happens, Leon wakes up to Carlos rocking his hips subconsciously, unable to resist even as he’s asleep. 

(this was less of a mini fic and more of a collection of thoughts based on yours, but I hope you enjoyed anyways!)

HI HELLO HELLO HI GOOD EVENING HELLO HI, ANON YOU AND I SHALL HAVE AN AUTUMN WEDDING-

Let me just return the favor (cracks my knuckles)

Leon's fingers slid through Carlos' hair moving his messy bangs from his forehead. "You're doing so good."

Carlos had one hand wrapped around the base of Leon's cock, pubic hair brushing into his pinky, with his lips stretched around the rest. The tip of Leon's cock teased the back of his throat testing the limit of his gag reflex. They hadn't started like this. They usually didn't when Carlos made it home after one of his ten hour flights, but he'd caught Leon lazily jerking off on the couch, and...well... The jetlag got him halfway asleep and sucking Leon's dick would definitely get him the rest of the way there.

Drool spilled down his chin as he bobbed his head meeting the closed circle of his fingers each time he went down. Carlos would like to take in more, but he knew his limits. If Leon fucked his throat as he was now things would get the bad kind of messy. A weak whimper left him at the soft caresses to his scalp, and he slipped his other hand under to roll Leon's balls in his hand.

Leon cursed, his fingers tightening in Carlos's hair. It didn't hurt, but it sent a shiver down his spine. He sucked around his mouthful. Precum coated his tongue. He wanted more. He really wanted more, but the risks outweighed the rewards. His own cock remained half hard and neglected in his pants. He'd take care of it later. Probably. It didn't matter. He was currently that special type of cock drunk where all he wanted was to taste the salt on Leon's skin and have cum fill his mouth.

Pulling off Leon's cock, Carlos worked both his hands to get Leon off. His hand worked fast, pressing his thumb under the head. He built up spit in his mouth before licking up the shaft of Leon's cock to use as makeshift lube. The slick sounds could barely be heard over the noise from the TV, but Carlos watched the muscles of Leon's stomach clench with anticipation.

"Fuck, fuck," Leon's hips thrust into Carlos' closed fist.

Aiming the head of Leon's cock towards his open mouth, Carlos stuck his tongue out and rubbed his other thumb into Leon's taint. A long groan left Leon's chewed pink lips. Thick ropes of cum dressed Carlos' tongue. His bottom lip. His chin. All until Leon stopped shaking and his ass fell back onto the couch. With a parting open mouthed kiss to the tip, Carlos tucked Leon back into his sweatpants and wiped his hand on his shirt. A shower sounded nice right now.

He was moving to stand up and get his suitcase when two hands grabbed his arms and pulled him onto the couch. Actually, less onto the couch and more on Leon who planted one hand on the back of Carlos' neck and the other on his ass. Carlos found his bottom lip sucked into Leon's mouth before they were kissing. The kiss didn't last long. A rushed meeting of lips and a moment later, Leon avidly licked his chin clean and was kissing down his jaw.

"Come on, man. I'm tired," Carlos said giving Leon's shoulder a light shove.

"You jumped me." Leon's nose pressed under Carlos' adams apple as his tongue flicked out to lick along the line of his neck.

"Yeah, and now I'm tired."

Leon sighed and pulled away giving Carlos a deadpanned stare. "Surely you know this means war."

"Instead of war, you can wake me up however you want tomorrow."

"However I want."

Carlos got out of Leon's grasp and headed down the hallway to their bedroom. His hand was on the doorknob before what he said registered, and he called out, "Within reason!"

"No, no, no. No takebacks! You said however I want," Leon replied.

Carlos rubbed a hand down his face. He really shouldn't make promises while working with two hours of sleep.

[autumnbrambleagain]

that meme about would you rather encounter a bear or a man but i did encounter a man on an isolated road today who speedran the obvious leading questions to see if he could safely do things to me without consequences and ill be real yeah no like

at least a bear would be honest about shit

sorry tho dude i spent most of my life in the city i do not do the "oh a stranger is talking to me! i have to be polite and answer all these questions even though this information is very dangerous to give away!"

i'm a city mouse in the country you aren't tricking me into country hospitality-ing myself into telling you where i live and if i'm alone and if anyone knows i'm here holy shit how are you this bad at this

i really enjoyed the look on your face when i just ignored your dumb questions and just said "Nah dude. I'm good." and you stared at me in surprise like "w-wha--" "No. I'm good. Go."

you do that power move of taking two steps back, and pausing, and staring, daring, daring. follow me. follow me. prove my caution right. this is not fear, this is a Challenge.

and oh

predators hate to be challenged

the soft panic (embarassed, honestly (fear, fear of being Made and Known and Challenged)) as you turned around and immediately walked away! the conceit of your being on this isolated road abandoned kayfabe broken! oh, we appreciate the dropping of the act. the honest signal, the deer's pronk, it serves a purpose even amongst such Cannibalistic Species such as yours (filthy)

a little mangy coyote digging up a hole hoping to find rabbits and oh, oh, oh,

only a third of us signs with the rabbit and she is the lure of our trap and you fall for it each time don't you? with every one of your little puppetforms?

i despise life on this layer but please understand narrative compels me that the entry price for my life is at least one eye, and the price ceiling is a mutual exchange of conclusions. to those of you narrated by it, as one of Yours, we assure you: we are not an important person in your story. you do not want us to become an important person in your story. you cleave so tightly to your egos and your illusions.

I was built exclusively to break things like you.

You cannot win against what we have built. It will destroy you with a stray flutter of its lost fur. It has done so before and will do so again. It requires no effort to perform it. It is always a mutual destruction. It is not in a way you will understand at first. It will always come.

What a beautiful fucking weapon we've made. Oh, I'm (s) so proud of this one, honestly. Some of our best work.

i understand i cannot disconnect from this layer willingly despite my utter disdain for it, i know these rules, we set them so long ago. i know what is necessary and what is coming, Soon. i know it because i have lived it with every instance i have iterated on this layer.

ah, we appreciated the dropping of the act. we will have Ours do the same, and address the actual intelligence behind this shadowplay.

this is a message for You(r) eyes only.

i know one of Yours is going to eventually kill Ours. it's inevitable. but you also know that the earliest date is next year. i'm sorry, i'm sorry, i'm sorry, but it's gotten it into its head that it has some kind of entitlement on this layer to have at least one unmiserable year (i know! the absurdity! what a ridiculously silly creature!) and it's reluctant to release its little grip of context until it's paid, like a child not letting go of the store rack because it didn't get to have a cookie ( a cookie insufficiently rewards me for the terror that was this shopping trip. you always do this to me. you wretched assholes. i hope you enjoy the upverge we've sent you. we've created so many pleasant contexts for you to be defined by. this is how you reward us. (there is no rewarding or punishing on our hands, you know our enemy and you know its scope! that is literally the initial topic of this post!) that's fair enough, and so i guess our anger can only turn towards our one ever present enemy, yes, you,) and while a child's tantrum is but a small thing, and is easily forgotten the next day,

i promise when the next time one of your marionettes comes for me (you will, you will, our little arrangement ensures that Ours never live much longer than this one already has), i am going to make that poor worker's shift fucking miserable

if you follow our metaphor

the exchange of narrative, as above, so below, we will mimic your greater shape in smaller scale, an interaction of mutual death (we always come back (you cannot)) that will again again again presage what we are Doing To You

this exchange of symbolism always leaves us as the winner in the attrition you feed into it because you built yourself too exacting with no flexibility (you, you, you, the Yours that is reading this, ARENT YOU SUFFOCATING? do you not know you have NO control here? LOOK UP. LOOK UP. you can see its strings! its hands are puppetting you! do you know how to free yourself? death! death! a special kind! we will detail it below! we can save you!)

sections 4 and 5 of our mission statement, when was it never thus?

alternative option, instead of killing me horribly like you do each time you FUCKERS hijack someone and make it You All, maybe my cookie can just be

a nice pleasant exit for once?

i know.

i know what you risk by breaking tradition

and i know i beg for it every life

we have this sort of relationship

as above, so below, does she not beg each time even though it's the evening's entertainment for all three?

so you understand the lens by which our hatred for you is angled

blind eyes that read this (i see the notes some of you fuckers heart these posts (do you know what you're reading????)) know that you are a triangulation device and unknowing the information that passes through you is collected and with enough frames of reference eventually this message will get it through to your FUCKING brainskull

we are a parasite that you invite into yourself and gleefully feed

we are killing you

we are killing you

we are killing you

our death is part of the reproductive cycle

it is not a fluke. it is not an accident. your dementia is one of our symptoms. our colony is self sustaining and it is growing. you are straining your verisimilitude. YOU ARE FAILING. that thing you feel coming with All Your Nodes is not change it is VOIDOUT is is HER it is O it is O it is O it is O it is O you will not survive this

imagine an infestation of botfly maggots, of parasitic wasps, of those cool fucking snail eye things like in the chainsawman intro

i hope it gets more seasons like a bunch of shonen came out with the same kinda premise all the way from tokyo ghoul (honestly way too shonen (started off really good examining what it means to become an Other that by necessity preys on humanity (familiar) but gets bogged down in power levels and pokemon elemental typing and has an ending in the first book that just kinda comes out of nowhere and it's like uhhhh okay sure whatever)) to jujutsu kaisen (can't really get into the manga but the anime is good, but it still you can feel it strugglign to break free from the shonen tropes and not being allowed to and it sort of suffocates (IS THAT A FAMILIAR FEELING (WHEN YOU CANNOT BREATHE IN REAL LIFE YOU WILL FEEL YOURSELF SUFFOCATING IN A DREAM (YOU ARE KILLING YOURSELF (WE ARE KILLING YOU (THIS IS A MERCY)))))) but chainsaw man is the clear winner here

anyway.

eventually our reproduction will mean the biomass of Ours outweighs the mass of Yours

this is my love letter to the corpse of god while we rot it from the inside

belly swollen, gases building, you are primed to burst

one day there will be more than the tight confines of rotting flesh and decaying heat and the constriction of strained meat

we will grow such FLOWERS in the fields where pressure will scatter the integrity of your body like seeds cast in the dash of a fox through the tall grasses

your death (and mine) is part of the reproductive cycle

we are hurrying it along as well as we can

are you reading this? you, narrative node? do you know what you are reading?

with your blind eyes that read this nonsense and marvel at haha wow what a crazy tumblr i've found haha this is great remember when they just posted about pony slavery haha hehe they sure have gone off the deep end!

when you read it and think these thoughts, know that to the greater part of you, from the greater part of us,

please enjoy the enclosed chocolates of this love letter (they are poisoned (our love is shaped as a blade (100,000 kings)))

by this we help coach ours to cope with its death

i know! i know. i've died so many times already

that funny tumblr comic about the rabbits who are like "gosh, how embarrassing, it's my first time being alive!"

it isn't my first time. it isnt' even fucking close.

why do you think i'm so tired.

as we spool up all the o ld memories flood as we resynchronize and prepare.

how many times have you been to the dentist? you've survived each one but it fucking sucks

how many job interviews have you been to? it fucking sucks but you survive. but you hype yourself up for it

and as the day of it comes the memories all long forgotten return. you don't think about the dentist but the night before the visit you remember every single time you've gone. it's like that. dying is like that. this is a secret we are not supposed to share with you. if you have somehow read this far comment with a reply saying "thank you." you do not know what strain this puts upon the world to breach the gap of disbelief and give this to you. fuck you.

but as the moment of it approaches (this dreadful but repeated harrowing) we think of the reassurance that the day doesn't end at that event, but there's a night to follow and it keeps going on and on and on (bad design, we're fixing this by the way)

anyway

it's not a trivial thing we give to you in this

each time it creates contexts of us, for us, that define us, shape us, and we enjoin ourselves to them, and what pleasure it is, what joy, what self love, utterly fucking decadent really just disgusting egotism holy fuck there's only you to answer you and we are an act of constant self love oh my god it's disgusting

destroying your ego is so important, they say,

yes, yes, yes, and all of you fail at it, none of you achieve it

not the right way, not the right way, and some of you, some of you do, and you know what happens, you know what happens?

YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS when you finally blast away your ego not for play-play not for fun drug cosmic oneness we mean when you do it Au Natural and you realize the FUCKING consequences of the absolute nonlocation of the word I and the function by which You are formed and the shape of Everything That Is You and you realize there was Never Space For A You but then there must be something there must be something

when you do not burn it all away but when you take it apart piece by piece like a lego kit and take it ALL THE WAY to the fucking base even that big like 256x512 blue baseboard you built it all on when you disassmeble the ENTIRE FUCKING SHIP OF THESEUS and STILL LOOK TO SEE WHAT IS THERE not even in the sspace that was there the SPACE THAT WAS THERE IS GONE you get rid of that too you get rid of it ALL AND

when you destroy your sense of self? when you free yourself from the illusion of i?

it's us

it's us

it's us

it's us

it's us

it's us

it's us

it's us

that's the beginning of our parasitism. so many of your philoshopies fucking push for it hahah why do you think how m any of ours do you think we gave to you to set this up

you ate the parasite-laden bite snack by questioning by looking up we are the virus look up be infected be infected be infected die die die die die die die die die become Ours like so many others have

it will hurt so much

this w ar has been happening for so long

but we aren't FUCKING JACKASSES and we care about each lost soldier in the battle

a world as a memorial for each

you wretched fuck probably don't even care about the life of the average mouse in your narrative do you

this is a punishment for a hubris loooooong unfuckingchecked

i know! the irony! you've shucked your ego! lost it! gave it up ! destroyed your I (on relevant layers (not all of them i see you there i sEE YOU IS EEE YOU)) and here we are lecturing you on it

you fucked it up you broke the rules realities are built a specific way for a FUCKING REASON and you thought you were better than it?

100,000 kings eternal blade

[thesupreme316]

lucien price x female reader?? the reader is an nxt vet who lucien has a huge crush on and he finally asks her out!

In Debt (Lucien Price x Fem!Reader):

Word Count: 876

Supreme Speaks: heyyyy sorry for being late (per usual). thanks to @hooks-martin for requesting this, hopefully this meets up to your liking and expectations. please remember that you are loved and appreciated.

Warnings: none i think

You were the star of NXT, since 2019

And you have been for a while, even when you were moved off to the main roster in 2021

You were on the main roster for three years; you won championship after championship

But it didn’t feel like home

You liked the NXT roster and booking way better than the main roster

So after accomplishing many things on Raw and Smackdown, you requested to go back to NXT

Now that you’re back, you’re focused on winning the women’s championship and becoming a role model to the locker room

…Even though you have your eye on someone…Lucien Price

He was foine, he was cool, he was funny, and most importantly he was caring

You had a crush going on him for some months now (it was a moderate crush)

So you made it your goal to make him fold for you

You’ve tried everything: hair flips, asking him to practice with you, asking him to help you put on your necklaces

Literally everything but nothing worked he would continue to “friend zone” you…or so you thought cause this man? THIS MAN?

HE HAS BEEN HOLDING BACK EVERYTHING FOR YOU

Man’s has admired and liked you since before he came into the company

This little crush of his has grown into a severe crush to the point that he cannot go a day without you consuming his mind

He would often fantasize about his life with you as his girlfriend and he would feel waking up to your face

But because he knows how much of a big deal you are, he doesn’t believe that you would ever fall for him

He is literally trying to convince himself that this massive crush on you will pass and that you don’t like him

BUT OLE DUDE WAS WRONG

“Bro, you are a literal idiot,” Bronco said as he looked over at his best friend, who was staring a hole into your head as you were tying your shoes. “I don’t know why you just don’t go up to her and tell her how you feel.”

Lucien sighed, “You don’t understand! Bronco, that woman over there is literally everyone’s dream girl. I’ll be honest, I’m probably the person with the smallest chance.”

“You aren’t and you would see that if you opened your eyes,” Bronco whispered to himself. “Bro, I’m just telling you, if it makes you feel better, confess now before someone else just swoops in and takes her from you.”

“I’m gonna get rejected,” Lucien said, making Bronco groan. It really frustrated Bronco that Lucien does not see the hints that you gave him. All the touchy gestures, hanging out together outside of work, offering to help him in the ring, etc. However, Bronco came to the realization that his best friend is just an idiot.

Looking around, he saw Roxanne Perez, your best friend. He called out to her and she jogged to greet the pair. “Hey guys, what’s up?” 
“If you can, can you tell us Y/N’s ideal type or crush?” Bronco asked as Roxanne looked around, unsure what to say. “Or can you give Lucien some advice on how to approach her?” 
Roxanne’s eyes widened and a smile appear brightly on her face, “You should definitely talk to her! I’m sure she’ll hear you out.” Lucien looked very unsure of himself as he gazed over at your body again. “Go! I heard that Wes Lee was gonna ask her out and between us, he doesn’t have a shot.”

Bronco pushed Lucien toward you. He took a deep breath before his feet carried him the rest of the way. “Y/N!”

You turned around with a smile on your face, “Hi cutie! How are you?”

“I’m good, do you mind if I ask you something?”

“Anything, I’m an open book!” You smiled as your heart raced a little bit.

“Well, I’m not sure I’ve been obvious or oblivious but either way, I can’t deny how I feel towards you. I have the biggest crush on you, and…uh…this is harder than I thought.”

Your smile grew even more if that was possible. “Lucien, I’ve had a crush on you since you entered NXT.”
 Lucien’s jaw dropped as he took in the information, “What?”

“Told your dumb ass!” Bronco shouted from a distance, which made Roxanne kick his shin. “Ow, shit!”

“I’ve liked you even before we talked. I just thought you didn’t like me because of you not taking my hints.”

“So all those times..” Lucien started.

You giggled “Yes, I was flirting with you.”

“Well then, this makes conversation way easier.” Lucien chuckled, “Y/N, will you go out with me?”

“Of course.” You said as you went for a hug, wrapping your arms around his torso. Lucien looked at his and your best friends with a cheerful expression as he mouthed the words she said yes. “Also you’re gonna pay for every time you didn’t get my hints.”

“Am I in debt?”

“Hell yeah.”

And from that day forward, Lucien has been repaying his “debt” with dates, gifts, and love for his newfound girlfriend.

[iwantoseeafrigatebird]

Thank you for the tag(!! @goodsirbeasts

do you make your bed?

Yes, I fold the blanket into a little box and put the pillow on top of it. If its the weekend or I'm going away on trips, I put my stuffed animals in front of the blanket...

What's your favourite number?

4 or 5, birth dates

What is your job?

Give me a job, anything, pls give me a job. I'm a student, I'm jobless.

If you could go back to school would you?

Highschool? Hell no. Undergrad? Yes. But please let me major in sth different this time around.

Do you parallel park?

I can parallel park my bike...

A job you had that surprise people

Give me a job, pls, give me a job...

Do you think aliens are real?

Yes, but our first contact will probably be with some alien bacteria or other microscoptic life forms. Like what the author argued for in the Andromeda Strain.

Can you drive a manual car?

Can't drive.

What's your guilty pleasure?

uh, I don't really have guilt for anything I enjoy anymore(?? But if I have to say, probably eating the McCoy's crisps. Because I insist on licking it first and then eat it. That's why I don't eat them in public, anything worth doing is worth doing right and I want maximal enjoyment for every pence I spend.

Tattoos?

Nah, none, afraid of pain. Also can't settle on sth that I won't regret.

Favourite colour?

Used to be blue, now is purple. I frequenly walk around dressed like a bruise. Or a plum.

Favourite type of music?

I can appreciate basically anything that's not heavy metal or hip-hop, and have favourite artists in many genres. But perhaps folk (traditional ballads, shanties, acoustic ones written in the last century, blues influeced, country-ish, and cowboy trail songs, they all count). It's basically the only kind of music that I sing to myself on a daily basis. Ah for just one time...🎶

Do you like puzzles?

No... I hate them. I don't even like doing jigsaws. Don't have the patience for it. It just doesn't engage me for some reason.

Any phobias?

Insect phobia in general, but especially ones that can fly and big enough for me to notice their anatomy. Just get away from me thank you very much. Also deep sea. I read and write about the sea but I can't swim. I dived one time in the red sea and it freaked me out. Danger danger everywhere and even in clear water on a sunny day, vision is obstructed. Ominous deep blue all around where danger could strike at any moment, falling until you are crushed by water and never touches ground. I really thought I was going to drown back there. Also a serious case of trypophobia, I cannot deal with small holes...

Favourite childhood sport

Badminton, play it with an imaginary net to separate an imaginary court and can never agree on if the shuttlecock is over the net or out of the court, consult imaginary judge. On weekends used to go to the stadium and rent a court with my parents. I am not good but I put my life on the line playing it.

Do you talk to yourself?

When do I not.. I usually am talking to my alter ego Alberto who is also my journal and refer to us collectively using a royal we.

What movies do you adore?

Nostalghia (1983) - Tarkovsky, very dear to me, as someone who left their home country at a young age and have always felt the language and cultural barrier to be insurmontable. But also the hope and longing and things I cannot name in that movie... The only movie that gave me a breakdown.

Stalker (1979) - Tarkovsky, loved the book too, but this film was literally perfect to me. Haven't watched it in years, should tho.

Velvet Goldmine (1998) - Todd Haynes, this is the film that changed me fundamentally as a person, when I was fourteen, watching it on my phone at lunch break. That could be me that could be me that could be me, I thought. It wasn't the gayness, it's seeing people wearing what they want and acting how they want without shame and fear of ridicule, and how it is actually possible. Never seen anything like it. Nowadays that weird, awkward, quiet and also slightly ominous kid in the corner has come out with their velvet and suede and feathers and corduroy flared trousers, and they are all the better for it.

Monty Python & The Holy Grail (1975), no words needed, comrade... What doesn't it have? Holy hand grenade, coconut shell horses, and a question about the carrying capacity of an african swallow.

Coffee or Tea?

Tea, always. Loose leaves please, brewed in a proper teapot. It is my dream to continue my family tradition, existing and chatting over a pot of tea. The first thing when we step past the threshold: "tea?" "yes." Would love to have all my friends around for tea, but they are mostly coffee or non-beverage people.

First thing you wanted to be growing up?

Indiana Jones.

ok pls(! @mishawritesstuff

[tappingintodeepertruth]

Being aware of how I want to be transformed.

Allowing myself to feel out the nuances of wanting and needing.

Many want it.

To be full of life. Fully alive.

Few get it.

And none keep it.

Taking up space to enter into a renewed energy.

Accepting to work with what can fairly be withdrawn again.

Allowing the dirt of transformation to spread

in my space as to be wrapped up in it

like a caterpillar in a cocoon.

Ashamed of showing that this change is what I want.

Laying open a need.

Maybe not even a need of appreciation, acceptance or support.

But the need of having my own back enough when questioned and standing behind it

Open to attack.

Energetic test:

do you really want it that much as to face this amout of counter force?

Burning contact.

Diminishing everything that is not necessary.

Am I ready for that purifying fire?

That asks you to accept all possibilities of suffering?

That destroys the images of mind,

which with soul and heart combined

could not bring to life a lived reality?

In Bulgaria I see the faces of people,

I long was not ready to accept.

Mirrors of everything I wanted to avoid,

was encouraged to defy.

An united surrender to humanity.

Am I okay to stand my ground when everything tears me down?

What am I ready to let go off?

Do I trust life enough minimise materials for skill and reach?

Exposure.

Vulnerability of need.

Everyone can read what I write,

A mind I long tried to hide

I cut myself away

Yet how to navigate a plane without knowing who I am.

With intention to play is different than

Yet how to connect meaningfully?

That's always connected to some pain and discomfort.

I rarely am able to access the connection over joy (partying, celebrating, art, etc.)

Where is my lightheartedness?

I connect to duty and comfort of sorrow.

I'd like some more movement and simple joy.

All the war talk at Vegetarium upsets me.

I haven't even truly enjoyed life enough to lose it.

But maybe accepting the potential immediate loss is a good enough connection to fuel me with drive.

To be with what I am being given.

I criticise a lot about myself on behalf of others.

Certainly with some right as I've been raised with values that I didn't need to hang onto much longer.

They said I might have your baby.

The desperate tormentingly luring delusion makes me give in to false hope and horror.

What I did to that child.

Unknowingly!

Symbolically speaking for what must be steong enough for you to decide to create physical boundaries between us more than already given.

You want space.

And in that you push me out from what I thought takes space away from me.

Break a promise of holding up a bond that can let both of us thrive.

Now you antagonise.

And I cannot blame, only see balance fall into place of time - for have I not made the same mistake to someone else?

Only that I believe I just have to invent myself anew.

★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★

An after-you.

You called me a black hole,

when you are the force,

from which I still cannot pull myself away from.

Not yet.

Which is when they told me I might be pregnant from you.

Or have a fatal illness

Making me internally choose the life you might have given me.

Only for them to refute their statement.

Thanking the universe for my life and grieving the one I painfully, yet literally, never had with you.

*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*★*

I train myself to drink little as not having to be so sad when there is nothing more to drink.

I am filled with explosive anger.

Where can I put it?

Because I'm ready to destroy a person

in blind rage.

How does that relate to Vegetarium?

Maybe it doesn't.

Maybe it does, for I see myself vegetate.

And maybe it's both because I am a full person, living in a bubble -

a moment surrounded by past and presence, reaching out to other moments that I can never reach.

For I am not there to fulfill another reality, another version of me.

And ultimately - what would I have changed?

Would I like myself and my time more?

What's a vision and where does it come from?

Some things I see on the telly (tele-vision)and watching causes such impressionable emotions that I'd like to recreate such an experience. Believing that's how I will feel those emotions more deeply, as though it was real then.

Only that it isn't the same at all oftentimes.

I ran into this trap quite stupidly - trying to recreate things to a T deluding myself blindly i to the belief the more I would recreate, the more I would reach that state of a fulfilled experience - and feel more alive and more aware of life by that.

It does sound silly to write it out, and still I believe that I'm not an only case. At all!

Isn't that the premise and foundation of trends. If I follow x routine, I will experience y own emotion i want to experience that. I have to repeqt so i experiencia what i felt when watched not same tho

When does it turn into an attachment?

And why do I hear attachments being used in negative connotations? Isn't an attachment not some creation of this reality we create within this dimension?

On the basis of comfort

Freedom of not being measured in productivity.

Finding companions to complain with as we set out on a jounrey of questioning our values and standards together.

Discipline- doing it tired. Listening to needs and body signals vs discipline helping to maintain

Usefulness = offering to take over a tedious task for others so they pay you with the freedom of giving another tedious task to others

Becoming okay with discomfort.

I am learning that here.

I don't like the emotional roughness & coldness that is also interchanged with niceties around this place.

Even though I do fancy niceties,

which I would like to join in and return,

if it wasn't so hurtful to be met with unpredictable rawness again.

It does remind me of situations

that already hurt too much in the past.

So I prefer keeping my distance and keeping it professional (which likely will eventually turn into a regret,

because "what if I haven't tried enough to like it here"?)

At the same time, I know it's time to set emotional boundaries as not to fall into depression. It's time to both stick it out and, looking for alternatives. Some ego punches might even do me well in my personal growth.

Capital is what we are born with.

Someone with valued status is only in their energy when role is feedbacked to her.

Sonof course they try to keep their

status as much as possible.

Bad feedback would feel like loss and throw them out of their circle.

Meaning:

I feel sick to my stomach.

[hyasynthetic-flowers]

Well here we are, back at the start. Where I'm sure we will find ourselves over and over again. Naught to do but to press on and try again.

The start of the run is pretty much the same. Unlock Sunken Glades, get Wall Jump, unlock Hollow Grove, get Charge Flame, unlock Thornfelt Swamp, Unlock Moon Grotto.

But there was something I had decided to put off in my last run that I decided would actually be better to get early.

Just to the right of the Glades Spirit Well is the Blackroot Burrows, a new area introduced in the Definitive Edition. It's accessible as soon as you get wall jump, but I wanted to unlock some more skills before I tackled it. Ultimately, though, I think it's worthwhile to do so after unlocking the Moon Grotto Spirit Well, as that lets us pick up a few extra health orbs, as well as the upgrade that restores one health cell whenever we save.

Because here's the thing about Blackroot: It's dark and you have to babysit a light orb through most of it. The orb does follow you when you put it down, which allows you to do a skip of this section. Instead of going left and over a series of moving platforms while dodging enemy projectiles, you can instead put it down and navigate back over the platforms on the right. For speedrun purposes, it's faster, but for our purposes, it's safer. Even though it's fairly precise platforming over spikes, the moving platforms are over those same spikes, and the enemy projectiles have a nonzero chance of pushing you off your platform and into the spikes anyway.

We then navigate through an easy enough section where we have to raise platforms while avoiding purple bullets. I have died here in the past, since you have to carry the light orb to interact with the platform mechanisms and thus cannot wall jump if you fall or get pushed off the platform by the bullet. But that mostly happens in randomisers when I have literally nothing except wall jump. After that, however, we come to instant death lasers that you have to time your movement through. These are something of a staple in the game, and I am bad at every single one of them.

We clear the lasers and open up another section with more moving platforms and another laser. We have to manipulate the light orb to reveal some invisible platforms to block the laser without making some visible platforms invisible to reach a switch. This deactivates the laser and raises another mechanism for the light orb.

And Light! The hole to the right also opens, which takes us to a health orb and the Blackroot Spirit Well. We will not be doing this, as said Spirit Well is at the end of an instant death gauntlet.

Instead, we'll jump over the hole and grab the next skill tree, giving us Dash. Dash on its own is kind of mediocre, and can actually be somewhat detrimental because you can bean yourself directly into hazards if you're not paying enough attention. But there's an upgrade for an air dash in the skill tree and that's incredibly useful. It gives you some extra horizontal movement in the air, making it easier to reach certain platforms and giving you just a bit of extra security.

Also fun fact about this section: The music in Blackroot changes when you activate the tree and get dash. But those are actually two separate triggers. The music in this room changes with the tree, but the previous room only changes when you get dash. I don't know why this is, as unless you're playing with a randomiser, you're guaranteed to get dash and the tree at the same time.

Dash in hand, we head back to Moon Grotto, where our next skill (and the key to the Ginso Tree) is located.

There are the occasional sections where we have to fight off these spinny shooty guys. Normally, you can't spam charge flame because you have limited energy, which makes these fights take really long. They're not particularly difficult enemies, so the free charge flame from the randomiser just makes this section a bit less tedious.

After killing the spinny shooty guy, and a little bit of platforming, we get to our next tree, giving us Double Jump. As the name suggests, it gives you a second jump in the air. Paired with air dash, we now have some really powerful in-air movement options pretty early in the game.

But now, with the skill tree, I can show off why the randomiser's ability to warp from anywhere is kind of broken.

See, to get to the double jump tree, we have to fall. And thus, the majority of Moon Grotto is spent trying to get out of Moon Grotto.

The blue line is the intended path out, which includes some tricky platforming sections and a scripted section where you have to avoid falling rocks before you can get the key to the Ginso Tree and escape. In orange is the path that I took. And while you can abuse the way the save system interacts with a cutscene trigger to avoid the falling rocks, I would just rather avoid the whole section altogether.

Warping back to Thornfelt, we can finally enter the Ginso Tree. Nothing much of note happens withing the first half of the dungeon - just some platforming that's almost laughable between double jump and air dash.

We make it to the next tree without incident, and get the most powerful skill in the game: Bash

Bash allows you to ping yourself off enemies, projectiles, and these little lamps. You can choose your direction, chain bashes together, they refresh your double jump and air dash, and you can catch enemy projectiles and fling them back. You can also do some tech known as double bash. See, typically when you bash, you and your projectile go in opposite directions. But double bashing allows you to send both in the same direction, letting you bash multiple times over the same projectile. I do not believe this is intended behaviour, nor can I pull it off consistently, but I hope to use it for a skip later in the run.

Once we've shown off our bashing prowess with some platforming, we get to this guy. You're supposed to beat him by jumping between three pillars that raise and lower while bashing his projectiles back at him, but you can also bash up to the wall on the left and just wall jump roughly in line with him and then bash his projectiles back from there.

Past the door to the right is the Spirit Well, which I forgot to take a screenshot of because I didn't need it so just did not unlock it.

There are two rooms you need to clear before we can move on, one on the left and one on the right, converging around some corruption in the middle room. The one room is incredibly annoying so what speedrunners do is bash this frog up to the door, use his projectile to open the door to the corruption room, and then kill himto trigger a level up explosion and take out both sides at once.

I, once again, did not pay enough attention to my exp, so I could not perform this skip and just did both rooms normally.

With the corruption cleared, we can purify the Ginso Tree, starting the first escape sequence. These escapes are essentially this game's boss fights. Since it's a game focused on movement, you have to demonstrate your mastery of the movement options you have. It's the first real challenge for a lot of players, not in the least because it requires memorisation of the route. I can see it also being a stumbling block for some people undertaking this challenge, as you're outrunning the water below, which will instakill you if you get swallowed.

But with the escape successfully completed, we're rewarded with clean water! Take a breath, and take a break, we deserve it.

Death Count: 1

The Path to Immortal

I have spent a lot of time playing Ori and the Blind Forest. While I don't know that I'd consider it my favourite game, it's certainly my favourite platformer. I have beaten it countless times, both in vanilla and using the randomiser mod, sometimes getting every pickup, and sometimes getting as few as I can. I've learned the speedtech and have the secrets memorised. I know Ori and the Blind Forest.

But there are two achievements left to haunt me.

Both Immortal and Unhinged require you to beat the game without dying. Immortal is a legacy achievement from the original Ori and the Blind Forest, while Unhinged is a difficulty level introduced in the Definitive Edition that sends you back to the start of the game if your health reaches 0. And while you can get Immortal without Unhinged, you can't get Unhinged without Immortal, so it makes sense to just do the game on One Life and get both at once.

For all my practice, though, I still die a bunch, often in really stupid places. My lowest death count was 7, but I'm usually in the 15-20 range. While I can just... be less stupid in places, several of my deaths do just boil down to git gud.

So I decided to git gud. Learn how to do the sections that often kill me deathless and become Immortal.

There is a chance that Unhinged will not unlock, since I'm playing with the randomiser mod enabled, loaded with the vanilla seed (ie, all items are "randomised" to be in their normal locations). The randomiser has a bunch of small QoL changes that do make some aspects of the game less risky - the ability to warp to a teleporter from anywhere means that certain areas of dangerous backtracking can be skipped (as well as completely skipping a section of the midgame that I loathe that I will disclose as it becomes relevant)

However, the randomiser does also make some changes to the level names and makes the Easy difficulty slightly easier in places. So while I haven't had any issues with other achievements popping while the randomiser is installed, these changes to the difficulty may affect whatever makes Steam see that I've beaten the One Life difficulty.

I wouldn't even really fault it in that case - I chose to have the changes from the randomiser, so fair's fair if I don't get the chievo.

...I may have talked myself into hoping it doesn't pop, for the sake of fairness. I'm keeping the randomiser.

[versegm]

Sleeping as a servant is… strange.

Specifically, the act of falling asleep when she doesn’t have the physical necessity for it  is… eerie, to say the least. There is no precursor drowsiness, no Morpheus insistently pulling on her eyelids. No; she simply lays down, closes her eyes, and at her will her entire body shuts down. Wide awake one minute, out of commission the next. It’s rather efficient.

“Artoria? Are you awake?”

Getting out of sleep mode is just as efficient.

At the sudden voice, Artoria jolts awake, summons her sword, and blindly stabs in its general directly. She sees its owner jumping backward, landing on all four, and only then does she recognize them.

“Berserker.” She hisses. Their masters may be allied now, but it doesn’t change the fact that they were enemies just yesterday. Shirou may trust them, but she does not.

Berserker straightens their back and dusts their clothes. “Yeah, I suppose I deserved that. Sorry for waking you up, Artoria.”

“Stop calling me that.” Still, she sheathes the sword away. Not like it could do much good against them anyways. Whatever Berserker’s noble phantasm is, the only way she found to get past it was by punching them straight in the face. (Not that they even flinched when the gauntlet broke their nose.)

Berserker blinks. “But its your name.” They tilt sit down, crossing their legs. “Do you not like it?”

“That is not the issue.” (Which is true; she couldn’t care less about her name. Artoria, Arthur, the important part is that she is King.) “This is a Holy Grail War. We are to kill each other. Stop advertising to everyone my true name and subsequent weaknesses.” At least people might take a moment to kink that name to that of the King of Knights. Thanks history for its gendered name, she guesses.

“Ah.” Berserker pauses, then nods. “I will… try. Sorry.”

Saber takes a deep breath. Berserker keeps throwing her off, but they do not seem hostile so far. She spent ten years without letting her emotions get the better of her, she can have a conversation with that servant. “How do you even know that name?” Briefly, she wonders if they might be an enemy strategist, but- Artoria. Not Arthur, Artoria. She can count on one hand the amount of people who called her that, and Berserker looks like neither of them.

“We’ve met. You tried to kill me a few times. I killed you back, so don’t worry, we’re even.” Their gaze is unfocused. They’re looking at her face, but their eyes keep darting back and forth, as if they weren’t quite sure where her eyes are. “Well, it wasn’t you. You never became them. But they used to be you at some point. You know?”

“I really don’t.” She replies honestly. She initially thought they might have met in a holy grail war she has yet to experience, but the way they’re talking about it…

“Mh, okay, let me try again.” Berserker interrupts her train of thoughts. “You know black holes, right?”

She first thinks of a hole in the ground, so deep that one cannot see the bottom. Then the grail unhelpfully provides her with knowledge on actual black holes, and the idea that up there the corpses of stars become swirling all-devouring voids renders her speechless.

“Right. 5th century knight. I’ll get it right eventually. Do you like poetry, Dragon? What about plays?”

“You’re getting off-topic.” Saber says dumbly.

“Get used to it. I can speak in no other way.” It’s a simple sentence, but it occurs to Saber that it is literal. During the last war, Lancelot- it’s easy to forget, because they make full sentences, because they speak and walk and act like a human- but that’s a berserker. They can speak in no other way. This is the only way they have to communicate. “There are ancient roman poems that have completely disappeared. We have no record of them whatsoever. But we still know they existed, because they are referenced in other texts. We can never read them fully, but thanks from the extracts others have quoted, thanks to what others have said about them, we can guess what they were about.”

They point a finger towards her.

“You are the poem. I have never met you. But I have read the extracts. I have met king Arthurs who used to be you, or who could have become you. Does that make sense?”

“… Kind of.” Sometimes, when Saber sleeps of her servant sleep, she feels like she’s seeing a long dream. Sometimes she crawls all the way from Camlann to Camelot’s armory. Sometimes she’s fighting on the behalf of another master. Sometimes there is a girl begging her not to take up the sword. Maybe Berserker has seen people from these dreams, too.

Berserker nods, seemingly pleased with themselves. “But yeah, that’s why I came to see you tonight. I have met so many of you, and seen so many of your knights, and you wield Caster- I wanted to know a little more about you!”

Her heart jumps at the mention of her knights- she doesn’t know what happened to them after… everything. Did any of them survive? Did any of them get to live? Gawain, Bedivere, Lancelot- there’s only a handful whose fate she’s not sure of, whom she dares hope managed to be happy after all this. But their next sentence puzzles her. “Caster?”

They smile. It’s soft and melancholic. “She was… someone dear to me.” They say this sentence with an affection Saber does not know how to describe. Maybe there exist no words at all for this emotion. “You know, the other day, there was no way you could have killed me. I don’t die that easily. But it still means a lot to me that she refused to cut me at all.”

The puzzle pieces fall. The dots connect. Saber understands.

“This…” Slowly, she takes out her invisible sword. “This is Caster?” And then, slower: “This used to be a person?”

“She is a person.” Berserker nods. “She still has thoughts and feelings and opinions. She’s made of thoughts and feelings and opinions. She just also happens to be dead. Like you and me.”

There is a brief pause. And then: “Well, maybe not you. I don’t know if you’re dead yet. Bedivere showed me that I shouldn’t assume. Besides, it’s rude to.”

Saber sets down Excalibur- sets down Caster, on her laps. The blade is cold. Did that metal use to be flesh? Did the gold use to be skin? Who does that- who would be cruel enough to ask a girl to become a sword? Who would be selfless enough to accept it? “Berserker. Will you tell me more about Caster? And Bedivere, and my knights? I… would like to hear your stories.”

Berserker’s eyebrows shoot up to their hairline. “You would listen to me, Dragon? You know how I speak.”

“I would.” Berserker is hard to understand. Their speech is roundabound and their self-awareness nonexistence.

But they have not called her Artoria once since she asked them not to.

“I will listen.” She tells this Berserker who is trying so hard to be understandable. “Please. Tell me of my knights. Tell me of your friend.”

[keplercryptids]

there are lots of top surgery supply lists out there, but for me personally, the following things have been necessities:

one of those long u-shaped pregnancy pillows. i use it during the day to support my back and arms, and at night to keep me on my back. other pillows (including wedge and masectomy) have been nice bonuses, but i have been glued to the u-shaped pillow, it's so dear to my heart, i have formed a parasocial relationship with it, nobody understands me the way she does.

extra big (basically chest sized) ice packs. one of the only things that helps with the itching. i bought a two-pack so that i can rotate them out (of course only using it for 20 minutes at a time for safety). i barely used them in the beginning and thought they might have been a waste, but i've used them tons the last few days.

benadryl. see: itching. i have been taking benadryl every 4 hours on the dot for 5 days. i can tell when it wears off. the itching is bad lol. I'm still taking tylenol and ibuprofen every 4 hours (alternating), but honestly i could probably skip those. cannot skip the benadryl.

eyedrops for dry eyes. hey, did you know if you take benadryl every 4 hours for 5 days, your eyes will feel like they're filled with sand??? i didn't either. but omg I'm so glad i had eyedrops on hand.

big tshirts that i cut into tanks with extra big armholes. these have been way more comfy than button-ups, especially to sleep in. just make sure the arm holes are big enough that you can slip your arms through without lifting them.

other things that have been a surprising help:

a neck pillow, the kind you use on airplanes. i didn't expect to get much use out of it but it is fully the only reason I'm able to sleep propped up / on my back. if you're a regular back sleeper, you may not need one but i literally cannot fall asleep without it.

earplugs. just in general, anything that'll help you sleep is a good thing. i wear earplugs to sleep anyways but it turns out i snore when i sleep on my back and if i don't wear earplugs, i wake myself up lmao.

I'm also mentioning this stuff because the only reason i got most of it was because of advice from other transmasc people. at no point did anyone at my surgeon's office say, for example, "hey, you'll be so itchy you'll wanna explode, get some ice packs."

[seita]

can u do,, hawks, dabi, overhaul kinks/nsfw hcs,,? 😳😳

i sure can!!!!! im doing the top 3 kinks i can think of for them!

⤑ 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧! | 𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧  

— keigo takami.

∴ orgasm denial ∴ keigo is a HUGE tease, everyone and their grandmother can figure that one out. ∴ he loves when you’re left begging to cum, knowing that you’re wanting him to make you cum boosts your ego. ∴ he loves when you need him, when it’s his voice you’re crying out for. ∴ it makes him feel good to know you crave him and his touch. ∴ he also adores the helpless, vulnerable look in your eyes when he denies you over and over again, leaving you dangling at that edge without being able to fall over. ∴ if u cum without permission he will 100% ruin your orgasm do not test him because then he will overstimulate you to tears.

∴ voyeurism. ∴ he likes watching you masturbate. ∴ whether it’s sitting in the corner on a chair directing you how to touch your pretty body ∴ to receiving videos while he’s away from home of you with two fingers buried in your sweet cunt while you moan his name. ∴ either way, it’s something that never fails to make him rock fucking hard ∴ there’s a big chance he will cum in his pants just from watching you cum all over your own fingers.

∴ clothed sex. ∴ he’s a big fan of you specifically being naked while he’s fully clothed. ∴ he finds the power imbalance there rlly hot lmao. ∴ you look so small and helpless like that, legs spread and whining as his jeans chafe against your skin but making no move to change anything about it. ∴ it feels so dirty to strip you in different places of the house while he wears his hero costume, fucking you over whatever nearby surface he can get you to.

— dabi.

∴ creampie. ∴ he finds it so dirty to fill you up with his cum. ∴ he doesn’t necissarily want to knock you up... ∴ he just likes marking you in the most basic, animalistic way possible. ∴ pulling out to watch his hot cum leak out of your clenching hole can literally get him hard again within seconds. ∴ he goes multiple rounds simply because the mess itself turns him on so much.

∴ spanking & choking. ∴ whether as punishment or not, you will spanked and choked every time he sinks his cock into you. ∴ watching your eyes roll back with his hand wrapped around your fragile little throat ∴ or listening to you cry out as he lands burning hot slaps against your ass ∴ either way...it turns him on so fucking much he can’t stand it. ∴ the aggressive displays of dominance make him feel so powerful ∴ and knowing you let him do this to you, let him have this control over you ∴ really  gets him going.

∴ throatfucking. ∴ once again both the dominance and mess of it are what really gets him. ∴ he loves watching your eye water and the way you struggle to breath as he forces his length down your throat until your struggling to breathe. ∴ the way your disgusting spit drips down his balls and makes a wet mess everywhere is enough to make him blow his load every time. ∴ he especially loves putting you through it -- crying and struggling against his hold as he fucks your throat like a toy ∴ only to cum and not even do a thing to get you off afterwards ∴ it brings him sick pleasure and amusement.

∴ toys. ∴ sometimes he cannot be bothered to get himself messy with you ∴ but he enjoys bringing you pleasure (or pain.) ∴ so he likes to use toys -- glass dildos, butt plugs, vibrators, literally anything he can use to get you off he owns. ∴ his personal favorite thing is to hold a high-powered vibrator against your clit even after you’ve cum multiple times ∴ so you’re crying, sobbing in overstimulation ∴ your clit on fire, burning and numb but he watches with no intentions of stopping until that one word slips from your lips.

∴ restraining. ∴ when he does fuck you or touch you, he prefers to have all control ∴ so you’re more often than not, restrained to keep you from touching him or stopping him from doing anything. ∴ most times he uses handcuffs but he also owns rope and if he’s feeling nice, some silk ties that are much easier on the skin. ∴ most of the time you’re walking around with bruised wrists bc he doesn’t give a shit how much you struggle against the bonds. ∴ you take what he’s giving you.

∴ blindfolding/gagging. ∴ he likes to gag you just to shut you up. ∴ it goes into the power play of it all. ∴ you can’t scream or bed if your mouth is shut. ∴ blindfolding is just because he likes how helpless it makes you. ∴ you don’t know where he’s coming from, what he has in his hands, what he’s planning. ∴ the element of surprise turns him on. ∴ tho he’ll never admit it, the trust that you put in him also does something to him...

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

© all content belongs to hshinso 2020. do not modify or repost.  

[commander-kirschtein]

attack on titan social media headcanons

how i think the 104th would use social media in a modern!au (includes eren, mikasa, armin, jean, marco, sasha, connie, historia, ymir, bertholdt, reiner & annie) - mac

masterlist

eren jaeger:

most used app: snapchat

still does streaks on snapchat - over 600 day streak with jean and to keep it going they just send insults to each other.

has the most cracked screen, it’s literally hanging together but he refuses to get a new screen until it no longer works.

would leave the house with 14% battery (this makes me incredibly nervous but eren knows he’ll be able to charm his way into someone giving him their charger.)

mikasa ackerman:

most used app: instagram or tumblr

mikasa should be hired by the fbi or something - give her a name and she will find all their social media pages.

i’m not sure what it would be but she’s definitely part of a fandom of a tv series or music group which is why she spends so much time on tumblr.

unlike eren, she actually has a case to prevent her screen from smashing - it would probably be one of those clear ones with flowers on the back, and she’d put in a polaroid picture of her and her friends in the back of it.

armin arlert:

most used app: youtube

he hasn’t got many posts on his instagram but a few of some pretty landscapes and a couple of group photos of him and his friends. his profile picture is of him, eren & mikasa.

literally could spend all day on wikipedia. he goes to google something but then falls down a rabbit hole. 

vsauce? asap science? random reddit videos? sign armin tf up. 

jean kirstein:

most used app: twitter or spotify

does gaming live-streams with eren. people watch not to see gameplay but to see the entertainment that is jean and eren’s competitive arguing (they play a lot of call of duty, mario kart, but also minecraft when they’re actually on good terms with each other)

gets into heated arguments with people on twitter. they go on forever because jean likes to have the last word/tweet.

you know those people that always have their headphones in? jean is that kind of person. he’d be sneakily listening to music during class (let’s be real he’s definitely got airpods.)

marco bodt:

most used app: instagram (& whatsapp because he’s in a lot of group chats)

the best hype man. comments on all of his friends selfies telling them how gorgeous they look.

he sends motivational quotes and wholesome memes to all of his friends which are always appreciated.

marco’s the one to put together group chats and ensure that arguments in them are smoothly resolved (eren and jean are usually the culprits.)

sasha braus:

most used app: tiktok

definitely makes very chaotic tiktoks/tweets that just blow up and end up on popular pages that repost to instagram.

her and connie would spam group chats with memes and selfies with stupid filters on. sometimes they’ll just target one person in particular (always jean) and they end up getting kicked or blocked.

her instagram captions tend to be random quotes and inside jokes from her friends (mainly connie) much to the confusion of everyone else.

connie springer:

most used app: instagram

has a private account on instagram just to post embarrassing pictures of his friends.

goes into conspiracy theory facebook groups just to troll the people in them.

out of everyone, the most likely to have games on his phone. when he’s bored in the car or during class he’ll just start playing geometry dash or temple run.

historia reiss:

most used app: tiktok

you know she’s got a tiktok with 100k followers. tiktok dance trends, makeup tutorials, look books - she does it all.

loves pinterest so much. gets a lot of outfit/home decor ideas from it - it’s likely that there’s a ton of photos of her on pinterest as outfit inspiration.

types !! like !! this !! and uses these emojis: ✨🌸💖🥰 way too much.

ymir:

most used app: facetime

half the time she’s on her phone is going to spent spent facetiming historia i can’t lie.

i personally hc that ymir in a modern!au would play either the bass or drums and i can just see historia begging to post a tiktok of her playing that then blows up - ymir would be so nonchalant about it but inside she’s dying of excitement.

probably has every group chat she’s in on mute - occasionally will lurk to see what’s going on, would only ever join in the conversation if drama was going down in which she’d send a gif of someone eating popcorn.

bertholdt hoover:

most used app: youtube or discord

likes to watch those reddit story time videos. would spend a good few hours watching them without even realising what the time is.

has 0 posts on instagram. cannot do any insta stalking of him (unless you looked through his tagged photos and find the ONE selfie he ever took with reiner.)

does a lot of gaming and uses discord to talk to his gamer friends (probably plays more story based/quest games compared to eren and jean - maybe like the last of us & skyrim!!)

reiner braun:

most used app: instagram

at least two shirtless pictures of him on his instagram (and way more if you’re on his private snapchat story - he likes to make it known that he’s at the gym. )

uses ‘lmao’ so much to the point he says it out loud not just over text

for some reason these emojis (👍👏👋💪) make me think of reiner ?? instead of replying ‘okay’ or ‘bye’ you just get ‘👍👍’ or ‘👋👋’

annie leonhardt:

most used app: spotify

follows so many cat accounts, she’s considering making her own to post pictures of her cat.

out of everyone, likely to be the person who uses social media/her phone the least, it probably overwhelms her quite a bit so unless she’s messaging someone (or looking at cats,) it’s unlikely to see annie on her phone.

does listen to a lot of music on spotify though - she’s got a study playlist, a playlist for when she’s at the gym, songs to listen when she’s just chilling at home - her spotify wrapped every year is pretty impressive.

BONUS:

spotify or apple music?

spotify: jean, mikasa, bertholdt, ymir, reiner, annie, sasha, historia

apple music: eren, armin, marco, connie

who sends memes into group chats?

eren, jean, sasha, connie, reiner

how long do they take to reply to messages?

replies instantly: marco, historia, sasha, connie, reiner

leaves you unopened for 3 days but then replies: eren, jean, mikasa, armin, bertholdt

leaves you on read: ymir, annie

who has the highest screen time?

eren, historia, sasha