#System Over Goal | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

thefinemen · 3 months ago

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Atomic Habits by James Clear

The Mastery Blueprint Hidden in Tiny Decisions Introduction: Big Goals Don’t Build Great Men—Tiny Habits Do Most men overestimate what they can do in a day… And massively underestimate what they can do in a year. Welcome to Atomic Habits by James Clear—a book that’s not just about habits, but about identity-level transformation. It’s not a motivational hype book. It’s a scientific playbook…

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cent-scratchnsniff · 5 months ago

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something bad did indeed happen to that man. spent abt 25 minutes trying to find a better picture of that one (1) offical piece with his eyes open that wasnt compressed or tiny

#library of ruina #yan library of ruina #getting comfortable doodling some objects and mannequin shapes for very obvious reasons. i read the keypage story and now it has a grip on #my brain. wanting to go ahead and plan it out and then draw the mangled memory and nightmare that replays behind the eyelids in the darknes #it was cool to see the reason confirmed from my speculation. twas indeed another reason of blocking out present pain with closing of eyes #considering they made angela have a plot important reason for doing so it would only make sense for another to have a reason for it as well #well. after having a prominent part inside the thumb/index story line. its just going to be yapping about yan now i think #let me add a spoiler tag i suppose? vauge but just incase i dont want to be an asshole. even if most already have played rhe game #library of ruina spoilers #lor spoilers #i really liked the typewritter effect over the voice after distortion. especially so when the effect finishes before the actual garbled voi #does. it makes it feel as if it were being read out after it being written down rather than of own words or volition. along with the text #upon the screen during the fight being just prescripts rather than anything relating to the man himself like the other instances with such #text had been. paired w the name of distorted yan being untranslated to keep the intent of the name being unreadable or not understandable #more into the idea of stripping away of the self or any sense of a self. not personal and not even him anymore. the following of a goal for #the goal for it is given and there isnt any hope of having the ability to not do such a thing. people yearn for a reason and something to d #and for it to be given to them to not hold responsibility nor have to do their own choices anymore. once a crushing weight weighs down #inside the face of an absolute cruelty that is perpetuated and that crushed the dreams or even desires having them be but nothing how can #one move on? it was really nice to see at the end of the fight. its easier to just say such things than to actually do them. even if the ac #ions dont even feel as if they are ones own or that there isnt any say in the matter having to endure all the pain for seemingly nothing it #still is pain. that feeling inside is still real. it still happened. regardless of the circumstances that brought them about #the thumb/index or just fingers seem to be an exaggerated to the extreme showcase of how the colletivist mindset in an unhealthy manner #could be exhibited. the thumb with its hierarchy and absoluteness and the demand for respect along with its strict layers of showing who is #below and who is above. the ability to have power over those underneath . the participation inside of it and the already brought up yearnin #to be apart of a group and to have a title and position inside of a group and of power and even a desire like from pete to join one iirc #the index being of the cruel perpetuating cycle of pain people inflict upon one another a behavior beaten and upkept by the systems as they #drift and desire to live. which causes them to partcipate in that cycle out of necessity. cruel acts upon another in order to live and seei #a need to go ahead and do such things for if they dont they die and another will just do the same to them. social sciences talk and rolands #talks abt how the city opperates reinforce that fact. the index and prescripts are really just a show inside that extreme manner and in a #more literal sense of that. it was really cool to read it..

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oceangemstone · 5 months ago

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therapy resources / schema therapy / dbt/dialectical behaviour therapy / internal family systems / meditation / c-ptsd etc. resources

this is a link to my personal google drive, it has lots of dbt stuff, some random other resources that either i or my friends have found helpful incl. DID/OSDD/dissociation resources, & some handouts from a personality disorder program i did (was aimed at pplwbpd officially but the staff all refer to it as the "personality disorder clinic", fwiw)

bunch of other stuff under the cut including video content if that's more your thing

DBT stuff

this subreddit is a wonderful community, usually helpful with questions & has some resources linked also:

https://www.reddit.com/r/dbtselfhelp/ https://dbtselfhelp.com/

TIPP skills (from dbt/distress tolerance unit but deserves distinction. biochemical benefit > psychological benefit. at least for me)

https://manhattancbt.com/dbt-tipp-skills/ https://in.nau.edu/wp-content/uploads/sites/202/TIP-Skills.pdf

also emotional freedom tapping / eft (not a tipp skill iirc but it should be, one of the few things that kinda works for me)

https://www.health.com/emotional-freedom-technique-8399985

SCHEMA THERAPY

"client's guide to schema therapy"

https://disarmingthenarcissist.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/09/clientsguideSchemaTherapy.pdf

(the website name is very questionable but i can't find the pdf for free anywhere else orz. this is a good starting point for schema therapy tho. sorry y'all. i will steal it for my google drive when i have time)

https://www.psychologytools.com/professional/therapies/schema-therapy

^THAT LINK stuff is not free!!! BUT you can find a lot of them with this google search:

[title of worksheet/handout] -site:psychologytools.*

ex. i search the following: "unhelpful thinking styles" -site:positivepsychology.* ...and this pops up, tadaaaa:

https://talkheart2heart.org/resources/unhelpful-thinking-styles/

(i'm just linking the paid site because i cant find them gathered like that anywhere else… dont have time to search each one individually rn lol. maybe another day)

free stuff:

https://positive.b-cdn.net/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/Schemas-Needs-and-Modes-Reference-Sheet.pdf (overview) https://bmcpsychology.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s40359-020-0392-y/tables/1 (more detailed info on each schema) http://www.schematherapy.com/id72.htm (more info on modes) https://positivepsychology.com/schema-therapy-worksheets/ (a few worksheets linked on that page)

if video content is more your thing:

DBT UNITS:

interpersonal effectiveness extras: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwPrhSDQ0V_tBg36U3wWZpLopxJBurSsq

"middle path" skills: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwPrhSDQ0V_uB2e7Y570ihYBEYd7dK9Sv

"radically open" skills: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwPrhSDQ0V_udTjVVHhz5e1wzOSDyVeN2

DBT expanded edition: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwPrhSDQ0V_vjlYkkflUDRmfhw_hM13M-

more DBT, videos by Dr. Thomas R. Lynch: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLkKKzTWUSjRhnRr5Pe2GMA7VDg_E8wBcm

DBT skills animations:

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL4Qw4-tlRJe-T2l5MtFOsLkTIkfZqjobY

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FAMILY SYSTEMS + ATTACHMENT

Patrick Teahan channel:

(great channel run by a mental health practitioner who has experienced childhood trauma, he gets it. check out the playlists tab. he also has some free resources/worksheets on his website which is linked on his channel iirc)

attachment styles playlist by Jennifer May, Ph.D: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwPrhSDQ0V_smHuEjj2CxW4u7J_FozLlS

Crappy Childhood Fairy channel: https://www.youtube.com/@CrappyChildhoodFairy/playlists

(cptsd content mostly, haven't watched much of her stuff but i liked what i did see. she isn't certified but she is someone who experienced childhood trauma as well).

healing cptsd (small channel, few videos but good info iirc): https://www.youtube.com/@healingfromcomplexptsd2767

MEDITATION

(i cannot recommend her channel enough… i don't watch her longer videos/seminar(?) stuff but her meditation videos are like. actually helpful lol? i find a lot of that stuff not helpful at all but something about her is very calming and open and grounding. love her)

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MISC

Rachel Richards massage channel:

https://www.youtube.com/@rachelrichardsmassage9660/playlists

(she has some great videos for somatic symptoms... some playlists focus on anxiety relief, breathing/relaxation, posture/mobility, sleep, etc.)

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Dr Daniel Fox channel:

https://www.youtube.com/@DrDanielFox/videos

(cw: ableism/ableist language toward cluster b's is present on this channel, he just has a LOT of videos so i include the link... like if youre looking for something specific to do with pd traits, there's a good chance you can find SOMETHING here. *i have mixed cluster b traits incl. the more demonized ones disclaimer*. but yeah steer clear if that bothers you)

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Struthless channel:

(mostly adhd/exec dysfunction/motivational advice stuff but i find his videos like actually kinda inspiring/motivating so i'm including it here since not a lot of stuff... feels motivating to me at all ever. but i never regret clicking on his vids! good motivational speaker lol)

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that's all i can think of rn please lmk if any of the links are broken or like... if you have a question u think i can help w ^-^

#ptsd resources #dbt skills #schema therapy #interpersonal effectiveness #trauma therapy #dialectical behavior therapy #actually cluster b #internal family systems #cptsd therapy #actually traumatized #ok i dont feel like putting more tags ... goodbye #x #btw the did resources don't include anything about integration... they're journal/symptom trackers #and stuff that helps with healthy multiplicity. total respect to both end goals but i do not have resources specific to integration #context this is a response to someone asking what to do when ur issues are too complex for therapists/no one will take you #i spent over 13 years in therapy and this is my 2 cents #because not a lot of stuff helps me lol #i have mixed cluster b traits and some other dxes #complex trauma #and therapy has been harmful for me many times. these things are ACTUALLY helpful to me. hopefully to anyone who sees this also

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rosieofcorona · 6 months ago

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#just some little thoughts that I have to get out of my system or I'll go nuts. pls ignore #but every now and then I just feel like maybe I am done with art? like. don't get me wrong it's fun and I love it but #I feel like I am not suited for the very fast-paced production cycle required for artists today and I literally don't know how to be?#and I get SO STRESSED about it sometimes and for no reason bc it's not my job or my career goal or anything #but I do work hard on stuff for months & then someone will make something 10000x better in like one business day and it's just. frustrating #ok anyway drama over to be deleted

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quietwingsinthesky · 2 months ago

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this is why i love the dark!fryes au because you really only have to make one change for it to work: instead of jacob wrecking london while evie’s back is turned, evie watches, goes ‘:( oh noooooo. how awful. who could have predicted jacob would do such a thing. anyway since it’s all been burned to the ground, the right thing to do is to replace the previous system with assassin money and manpower :) for the good of the people.’ and then she points at another person/industry for jacob to destroy and does it all over again.

#jacob moves through london like a bullet. tears through the flesh and drags it out of the exit wound with him.#all you have to change is make it so evie aims the gun.#which also neatly slots her into a similar role as pearl or roth in that she *is* manipulating jacob by encouraging his natural impulse to #make things burn. is she better than them because her goals are benign. is she worse because jacob loves her and she knows he wouldn’t tell #her no if her plans got darker.#AND it makes them both an even better parallel to starrick.#starrick’s whole deal is that he owns london and london owes him. that every industry is indebted to him. that the people are his because #he pays them.#stack that against evie and jacob coming to london with the express purpose of destroying starrick’s systems. AND making sure everyone knows #that the people who save them from that anarchy are the two pretty assassins who just want the best for them :) just want to set them free #so who do you owe your love and loyalty (and fear) to more. the man whose faltering grip can’t protect you. or the twins who will give you #a better life. so long as you don’t get in their way.#its fun :) fun concept :) :) :) fun to me when the templars and assassins basically have the same methods and just squabble over the ends #starrick wants to rule. evie and jacob just *want*. london. freedom. each other. and henry. as a treat.#evie frye #jacob frye #assassin’s creed

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dennisboobs · 6 months ago

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most annoying thing about being me is that i cannot engage with like. any fanon shit about dennis because i'm constantly on some advanced derangement and the stuff i thought two years ago when i was first getting comfy in the fandom is still the way everyone else looks at dennis but i'm like. yes but its Worse than this. you're like a quarter of the way there. this isn't the interesting bit, this is a symptom of it, keep going.

#ada speaks #i tried reading fic. i got probably 5 minutes in and was like hm i dont think i can do this #it doesnt like. piss me off. it just also does not interest me in the least #that post going around the other day got me thinking too like fjsmbfkfkj #i think maybe macbrain often causes ppl to come to the wrong conclusions too but 🥴#like i see so many people apply the same logic that makes sense with mac to dennis and it's like whoa. wait a minute. huh??#we're doing the catholic guilt thing here with him...? you think he's got a complex with that?#you think den's been anything other than openly queer since the show began ?? jdehkbfjkherbfjh i dont know man. where are you getting that.#dennis' shit is so far removed from anything else i think you NEED to understand him in a vacuum before applying individual circumstances #ie. when trying to understand dennis' behaviour Around Mac i don't actually think it has much to do with mac at all #or at least nowhere near as much as ppl give him credit for lol #he's just. like that. he's behaving perfectly in line with himself just not. with anything else. its not that complicated really #i also don't think that he hates himself nearly as much as everyone seems to think #conversely. also nowhere near the narcissist everyone makes him out to be.#still cant get over the absolute deranged interaction i had on twitter a while back where it was like.#''dennis isnt legitimately interested in Anyone because he's too in love with himself.'' like hdksbkfngmdjshdkfjfndj LOVES HIMSELF??#first of all the SINNED system is right there and those steps and that GOAL Mean Something secondly fhkfnskjrjdkbsnsnfnfk #meanwhile i was talking about some fic concepts & hcs a while back with a friend and they were like youre straight up writing plural dennis #like. ah. yeah. victoria is an alter. somehow i've written this while being like. hm. what IS victoria to him.#these two are distinct people coexisting in this body and dennis still *exists* even after coming out and transitioning...?#but how can i even begin to talk about this when i don't agree that much of anything in canon points to this. it's like.#i dont think brian lefevre or hugh honey or his random personas are alters. its specifically victoria and a few other instances #and victoria isn't even. a thing. glenn just conveniently gave a 'canon' name to a thing i was Already conceptualizing but its? not canon #anyway golden god firefighter and victoria manager. hello. anyone. dennis and victoria co-fronting.#this is more about. IFS than DID but it's.#idgaf about the macden other ppl froth at the mouth over im inside dennis' brain poking around i find them fascinating but not like that #(there is something wrong with me)#genuinely wish i could enjoy the stuff in the tag and the stuff that showed up on my dashboard regularly this is a curse DBKSBFMF

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growthmasterylab · 8 days ago

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discipline is a skill built in silence forged in small repeated acts your life reflects your structure your habits shape your power

#inner discipline #structure over motivation #routine design #daily power ritual #growth system #clarity meets power #western creators #goal building tools #productivity culture #high performance mindset

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nexus-nebulae · 9 months ago

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known we were a system for about 7 years now, probably been a system for far longer, and just realised. we got an intrusive self-fakeclaiming thought today and laughed it away

#it does get better it does get easier eventually you will not fear being wrong or out of place #the thought felt like it just rolled away like a little creek washing over stones #it used to be a tsunami size wave that would throw us around and leave us feeling like we're not fitting in or even in the right place #and now we're just. solid and sturdy and the water's calmed to a tiny trickle #this is the first self-fakeclaiming thought we've had in i think months #and honestly probably only brought on by very new system members not being used to being alone in front #(it's rare for us. we're almost always cofronting. but sometimes it happens and it's so jarring)#rejecting the idea that we could possibly be faking this gives us this massive sense of wholeness like. this is who we are. and it's right #it feels right it feels like. we're real again. we're healing and able to learn. we're doing better. we feel whole like this #sharing this body with a million others will only ever bring us joy this is home this is love this is healing this is right #i love being plural #i love having a system #i love my headmates #we're so so close to hitting our real milestone of being functionally multiple #our challenge kinda. the goal we have to say Yes we feel we have functional multiplicity now #is to just. be able to connect all the sidesystems and have dormant people come back now and then and recover lost headmates #(TOBY WE *WILL* FIND YOU EVENTUALLY)#and it's starting! we've discovered people from BEFORE the syscovery we've brought back Blank and Ro multiple times #we talked to Bee once!!!! Bee literally hasn't fronted since fucking 2020!!! AND BEATRICE CAME BACK AND SHE'S TALL NOW??#and Siren came back!!!!!!! he was so so so fucking scared of falling out of the front rotation bc he thought he'd be lost forever but!!!!!#system wise i cannot believe how far we've come EVERYONE can feel the difference Ro and Blank get shocked by how much more cohesive we are #they were used to a constantly terrified proxy host and gatekeepers that loved to section stuff off and no communication #now it's like walking into a real place for them. they aren't used to headspace being this solid #when we started out WE DIDN'T HAVE ONE we had to manually build it and it took so long and so much focus #now it's as easy as closing our eyes #god i fucking love this im so happy right now

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cuteniaarts · 1 year ago

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Wine stains on porcelain

(Alternatively: @katkastrofa and I have created 5 OCs in 3 days and I suffer from chronic “I wanna draw the little guysssssss” disease)

#my art #artists on tumblr #the legend of korra #original characters #I have not figured out a tag system yet so for now this is all they’re getting #their names are liba and abyan and I’m very much obsessed :)#they’re the children of two of our other newest OCs. Himman and Summiya #the latter of whom just happens to be Zaheer’s older sister #but he ran away from home years before these two were born so he most likely isn’t even aware of their existence #I mean. I’m sure he suspects his sisters had children. but that’s the extent of what he knows #anyway #quite a few headcanons came to mind as I was drawing so I’m gonna type them out while I can still function #(haven’t slept for two nights in a row. I’m starting to doubt whether I’m actually alive or not)#Liba is older by about a year but once they grow up a little it’s barely noticeable and people assume they’re twins #over time they stop bothering to correct them because really. they’re so close they might as well be #they were both burn with port wine stain birthmarks on their faces. much to their mother’s dismay #she has a whole perfectionism complex and needed her children to reflect that to maintain the family image #thus they were taught how to hide the marks early on. but the powder makes them constantly sneeze #liba is very self conscious about it bc of what her mother put in her head. Abyan less so bc while he’s expected to be perfect #his future doesn’t depend on his looks. he always tries to comfort his sister whenever she spirals too deep. no matter that she’s older #when no one is around to hear he calls her Lili <3 it annoyed her at first so she dubbed him Yanyan in retaliation #but over time they both grew to love the nicknames and now use them unironically #they’re the ultimate partners in crime. their goal? gaining as much freedom from their mother as possible #and sooner or later they will manage to do so permanently. which will make Summiya fall apart. but that is currently Kat’s domain #speaking of. hi Kat. I know you’ve already seen this in pencil but look! I coloured them!!#the birthmarks were both kinda annoying and rather fun to do. maybe I’ll change them later. I was too tired to look at refs so I improvised #and there’s no detail in clothing since again. 0 energy whatsoever. but once I refine their full body designs I shall go all out #that reminds me I need to go collect my new sketchbook. might do it on the way home from the store #okay I’m getting distracted. is this my very unsubtle way of trying to influence Kat to write that Summiya fic?#maybe. maybe not. you can’t prove anything 😁

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timeisacephalopod · 1 year ago

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Part of being Canadian is how similar we are to the US, and honestly not a single person on earth I think could genuinely pin point the difference between Canadian and American culture but the average Canadian. Americans assume we're the same as them (we aren't), even a bunch of Canadians think we're Americans, especially around voting seasons, and about half our cultural identity is "we're Not American!" but there are some cultural differences and if we all spoke French equally we could have had a language distinction but nooooo. Despite not being America unfortunately such a fuck off massive country right below your teeny tiny ass country (population wise) does result in a cultural avalanche from said fuck off massive country. Especially when you share a language.

The war of 1812 will forever be funny to me though because Americans were like "hmm maybe Canadians would also like to tell the British to fuck off, we will invade to show them!" And Canada was like *burns down the white house* and we've been tentatively chill with each other ever since lmao (even when we probably like. Shouldn't be cool with America but like. We could not risk that implosion politically or otherwise it'd be suicide).

#winters ramblings #apparently americans think they won the war of 1812 and you did not. you did not achieve your goal #and a bit over 100 years later canada would nicely ask sempi to be free and britian decided yeah i guess #you guys did a vimmy ridge in WW1 i guess you can be yourselves #and native people- still unable to vote and would be ineligible for another some 50 years or so- were probably like ??!!!!?!!!#REMOVE these pale faced demons!! and i cant say i blame them for that even if my settler ass does not mind being from here #no fucked up spiders very few fucked up bugs ok seasons amd weather where *I* live anyway #i cant complain too much aint no spiders the size of my head OR fucked up weirdo beez on steroids that look like some feckin #HUNGER GAMES ass shit and not an earth bug. if i lived on either coast though my opinion would be different #especially the east coast FUCK their ocean-y assed winters lake effect is bad enough. the SNOW BELT is bad enough #i cando without that shite too although outwest aint better especially in the praries but still no fucked up bugs so 🤷🏻‍♀️#anyway i do genuinely believe if youre not canadian you wouldnt even know the difference between America and Canadian culture #OR the difference of history and even CANADIANS dont know our voting system isnt the same #like we dont even have half the shit Americans do like an electoral college and canadians STILL think we need to vote #as if we're in a 2 party system. we arent. arguably were in a 4 party system but 3 if you reasonably dont count Greens #its fuckin weird though because youll see people talk about canada and america interchangeably #and like i cant evenblame em when even some canadians get confused or WORSE actually WANT to be america #usually conservatives who like deepthroating boot #although i do think this is somewhat odd as a phenomenon because America doesn't have ONE culture #what canada is near idential to is NORTHERN Americans like the south is a whole Thing with a textured history #like obviously the north is too but culturally i get that more than what the south has going because you could even argue #the south have MULTIPLE cultures and in the north you could at least argue the coasts are distinct culturally #like they got terms like pacific north west we dont have ANY of that we are an EXTREMELY small rural country #its strange to confise it with America but at the same time like. yeah that makes perfect sense to me. and not all at once lol

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dwtdog · 1 year ago

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I’m sorry I think we need to move on a bit but I’m still just so sad I’ve never particularly cared for George but this week all I’ve been thinking about is “George told me if he were in that situation he’d kill himself” just that thought going in circles in my mind. He’ll be ok, he has people, but still :( wouldn’t wish those kinds of dooming thoughts on anyone

man anon i am in the exact same boat as you 😭 i've always loved all of dteam equally but dream was the only one i ever got parasocial demons about, but after this week and seeing how george looked so off in his response stream, and how nervous sapnap was in his stream- even just to do a british accent or make references to things he and george joke about- it's made me feel so ouughhh :(( for all three of them

as for the kms joke george made (lol 😭) my take on that is 1. dream was getting jumped by twitter for something where objectively, he did nothing wrong, because it was mostly the gumball shit. 2. if i had to guess, george made that joke mostly just to get dream to laugh, and while they were drinking and watching f1 so. i wouldn't put too much stock on it being his actual thoughts :]

#cq.asks #i get the stress over that joke i really do #but remember he has a strong support system outside of spineless ccs #and man my goal 3 days ago was to disconnect from this fandom but idk HOW TO DO THAT #also dont hesitate to send ur thoughts on anything if ur getting in ur own head <3 #even if u want to dm or just send an ask u dont want me to post i'll always do my best to help u guys calm down

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ask-artsy-oncie · 2 years ago

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ORAS could have been so good if the gameplay had just been overhauled properly.

#Stupid shit #Pokemon #Like!!! It has AMAZING visuals/redesigns/environment designs/music/writing/the BEST random encounter system in the series #But its post-game is absolutely uncomparable to the original with the exception of how *cool* the deoxys encounter is #And the gameplay does not hold a fucking candle to the original at all.#It's one of those pokemon games you just blow through and that unfortunately makes it not as fun and also relatively forgettable #God... but what could have been if they cared enough to preserve what the original had in terms of gameplay #Like I played Alpha Sapphire and Emerald at around the same time over the last year or so. Revisited them together.#And ORAS did so fucking well in so many ways... and yet Emerald was way more memorable #So many battles in the original games actually mattered and had to be thought about with genuine strategies if you didn't just grind one mo #In ORAS literally none of it matters. There is zero challenge whatsoever.#And I KNOW I know it's because game freak realized that they were releasing this game to a market of kids with 'no attention span'#So their goals were different #But man does it make for a shit turn-based RPG to approach things that way.

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6ebe · 1 year ago

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Football needs an equivalent to a penalty try like if a foul that stopped a most likely goal occurs surely something more than a penalty kick which can be stopped by the goalkeeper is warranted otherwise players are incentivised to foul in the penalty zone

#can’t believe I’m saying this but penalty try my beloved #(as in a penalty try is an automatic try points haul to the team without the need to kick for the posts)#honestly this whole tournament thus far is reminding me how much better referring is in rugby which is crazy #we can hear the ref and video referrees over the feed during the game ? so you can hear the decision making in real time. that’s great #so much other stuff too also the scoring system is kind of snoozy #also I mean incentivised in the sense that if the initial attempt on goal is more likely to go in than a penalty

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icewindandboringhorror · 1 year ago

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oughhhhhhhhhhhh........ 89 F days in early May..........

#like 77F inside my ROOM right now whilst I try to get ready for bed and such.. DESPITE putting like layers of cover #over the windows and blocking the sun out for nearly the entire day.................................... evil #which I know is not bad compared to some places I guess but just...grrr....#Wild that one of my primary life goals and unreachable dreams is just ''live in a place with good air conditioning'' lol #No 'dinky little ac you have to tediously install in the window' that will be loud and annoying and keep you awake #and you can hear everyhting outside all the time and etc. etc. no.... the entire house... on one big air conditioning system....#imagine.............#Some news station posted a status like 'yaay summer weather! hope everyone has fun at the parks this weekend!''#... posts written by people who must live in some alternate reality or something ghjbhj...#One persons ''hellish doom pit of misery'' is another persons ''fun tee hee outdoor activity weekend~'' I suppose #I mean its also that my health problems just make me overly heat sensitive so there is SOME practical reason behind my preferences #also.. but even before I had as many physical issues. I just always loved that type of weather so much more and generally didn't like heat #MY version of ''OOh nice weather to go outside in!!!'' would be like.. 40F and partly cloudy. or gray skies misty and 60F or so. lol #... misty with gray skies my dearly beloved.... fog...... hail.... precipitation in general.... my closest ally and companion #... now I am daydreaming about them (cold weather conditions)...

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loverboybrightsideghost · 1 year ago

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i really do love practicing 🎻

#i'm in music school so now it's a much more significant source of my already very significant fears #but practicing only feels stressful when i don't do it enough and i'm trying to 'catch up'#some weeks fly past me like hurricanes and i get to my lesson and i can't say i've made any progress and that fucks me up #and i don't think that's ever going away- like i'll always have weeks like that cuz everyone has bad days and bad weeks #from time to time #but when i plan correctly (which is becoming more and more the norm for me) my practicing is something im really proud of :)#i have a System. i didn't do very well before i had it and i would die without it now.#i get excited about learning! i get excited having realizations abt things to change or work on when i practice!#it feels experimenty a lot of the time and i like it!!!#i have a lot of catching up to do in terms of comparing myself to others but i'm not here for them i'm here for me #i will do my best and i will learn from others of course but my goals are to make my Me better first and worry abt other people later #i won't lose sight of that #<- and when it doesn't feel experimenty it can be calming to just be like okay ik what i need to do now just. Practice. Repeat.#i mean music is a fucking rollercoaster and sometimes you are at the bottom and i hate that but it comes w the territory #sometimes you're just Stuck but you do get past it and in those moments i just try to think back to previous times ive felt like that #ive felt horribly shitty before and gotten through it and come out the other side slightly better!#life is like that i think #anyways. hashtag iris loves music and being a musician 🙄 nothing new over here hehe

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down-thedrain · 2 years ago

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see the thing about banban is its not super good. but it does have a lot of good concepts I honestly think would be really cool to explore. like yeah sure it started off as a poppy playtime rip-off but the story is actually kinda interesting

YEAH IKR the games are bad but like!!!! theres stuff to analyze!!!!! theres statements to be made!!!!!!!! and sure maybe thats because the bar for this series is so unimaginably low but fuck it. i think it has some merit

#posts in a drainage system #id take a thousand banbans over poppy tbh #its also kinda interesting how its grown away from the original main goal of rescuing your child #and instead has you being involved with this like. years-long conflict with all the mascots #while still retaining a small thread of your original goal #it would be nice if they could mention it more though. like maybe those notes left by the kid could build to something?#idk

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