#a wolf and his queueman

[teencopandthesourwolf]

Stiles: You can't tell me the time can you, Der?

Derek: No. I'm not wearing my watch right now and my phone is switched off.

Stiles: WRONG! It's because you're a WEREwolf and not a WHENwolf!!

Derek:

Derek: You are so lucky I'm into you.

[ksanaob]

Yeeeeees!!!!!!!!!

Ship dynamics are always like Sunshine and Sunshine protector~ Cinnamon roll and their grumpy one 🤗 Well what about 2 cunts. They're both cunts and that's the dynamic. cunt4cunt.

[teencopandthesourwolf]

Derek: *shoves a Valentine's Day card into Stiles's hand while extremely red in the face*

Stiles: My dude, if you're crazy enough to think I'd throw it all away for you...

Stiles: *points at Derek*

Stiles: A traumatised, edgelord lycanthrope with a Henley fetish and insane Eyebrows of Doom™

Derek: *waiting for rejection and on the verge of Anime tears*

Stiles: Then you're crazy and you're right! *lunges at the werewolf to messily yet romantically suck face*

Stiles: *into Derek's mouth* Happy Valentine's to us, babe!

Derek: Awooooooooooooo!

[teencopandthesourwolf]

initial sketch for THIS

[teencopandthesourwolf]

Derek: *frowning like he's getting paid to do it*

Isaac: Hey man, what's the worst that could happen?

Derek: *eyebrows of doom*

Isaac: Yeah I know we both know the answer to that; I'm just really, really bad at being nice.

[teencopandthesourwolf]

god he's so fucking pathetic. what a god damn loser. (insane with lust)

[teencopandthesourwolf]

THINGS THAT HAPPEN IN EVERY EPISODE OF TEEN WOLF EVER

part ii (part i HERE)

coach finstock philosophy being the thing that actually fixes you

a soundtrack that consists of the sort of music that makes you wish you were no longer alive, plus (ironically) the excellent song lose your soul by dead man's bones 

jeff davis forgetting character's ages and back stories and sometimes the characters themselves (fuck you forever for kira, jeff, you massive poopy head)

jeff davis forgetting the plot

jeff davis forgetting the fact that nobody likes him

tuning in for sterek and staying for sterek even when jeff davis stops giving the sterek scenes together, and staying for sterek even after one half of sterek leaves, in the hope that the half of sterek who left will one day return so you can keep on watching for sterek even though sterek is not even canon and you know inherently it never will be  

brilliantly appalling special FX

meredith having even crazier eyes than the character from the show orange is the new black who has crazy eyes and is actually named crazy eyes 

tyler hoechlin hands down having the best spine-tingling-hairs-standing-up-on-the-back-of-your-neck werewolf roar of any werewolf on any film or tv show about werewolves ever FIGHT ME

queer allegory my beloved <3

isaac inexplicably wearing a scarf all-year-round

all the characters bar derek (only bc it's hard to get it wrong with a henley and black jeans which is all he ever wears apart from the one-time crimson thumbhole shirt that was inspired drip) having honestly the worst fucking dress sense

jackson being the angriest most brilliantly hammy antagonist ever with the best facial expressions known to humankind who ends up evolving into the most adorable gayest gay to ever gay living his best life in londonia with his lovely boyfriend ethan where they are now both runway models for jean paul gaultier (who everybody knows is a french werewolf from way back when in the la bête du gévaudan era)

getting the feeling you should be doing absolutely anything else with your time instead of watching these idiots yet being completely addicted to loving this penny and dime clown show more than you love your own nearest and dearest 

VOID STILES BEING A 1000 YEAR OLD FOX DEMON THAT MAKES YOU HARD

having the constant need to shake scott vigorously because he is the funko pop! bobble head we all know and are forced to tolerate 

chris argent being such a cringe over-the-top-gun-toting-who's-your-daddy-badass that he somehow actually manages to circle back around to being rad af  

chris argent being so real and a dilf

none of the characters ever talking about the fact that scott's dad was an abusive arsehole apart from stiles because stiles is a champion amongst men who makes sure to tell scott's dad between scenes that his head looks like a cross between a crescent moon and a foot

every single character on the show knowing that there is not a hint of a shadow of a doubt that derek and stiles are doin the narsty—even the off-camera characters we never get to meet are always congregating on the reg in the grocery store or the coffee shop or the WSWA (We See Werewolves Anonymous) bi-weekly meetings and are all like "you know that furious-looking autistic dude with the spectacular monobrow whose eyes are sometimes definitely way too blue? and the noodly peewee herman MIT ADHD kid with the duct tape jeep whose dad is the sheriff of this fictional town none of us live in? they are definitely fucking omg." 

each and every school lesson we see scott and stiles attending actually being a top secret pentagram level mission impossible code for whatever supernatural shit is about to go down in beacon hills that day 

outing you as the monsterfucker you really are LMFAO

(find part i HERE)

[teencopandthesourwolf]

THINGS THAT HAPPEN IN EVERY EPISODE OF TEEN WOLF EVER

part i (part ii HERE)

17 different heart attack-inducing storylines all overlapping with one another with some genuinely excellent concepts and lots of cool af lore that's executed so terribly it convinces you that whomever is in charge must surely be a hamster

werewolves and teenagers alike with some seriously debilitating mental conditions running around like they're contestants on the wheel of fortune

scott pining loudly over allison, pre or post allison's death, regardless of who he is dating at the time

beautiful beautiful derek "my whole family died and i'm being soso brave about it and trying to make myself a new one by collecting teen misfits and putting them in a plastic tupperware box but forgetting to poke holes in the lid bc i'm on the spectrum and trying to process and deal and grow as a person which is really tough when life keeps getting harder instead of easier and will somebody please PLEASE just give me a break" hale.

deaton being a smug little twat

STILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTILESSTI

greenberg being the star of the show

lydia slaying

everybody apart from stiles running around like headless chickens while stiles tries to tell everybody what they need to do but none of them ever listen to stiles so stiles has to do something drastic and dangerous then everybody is all like OMG STILES WHY DID YOU DO THAT THAT'S SO DRASTIC AND DANGEROUS WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU and stiles has to try his best not to eviscerate every single fucking one of them bc he is a good friend to scott

jeff davis doing his doggone constipated best to debunk sterek by writing dialogue/giving directions that hilariously just ardently confirm sterek even more with each epically gay scene

scott sending out thee biggest punch me i'm a motherfucker vibes

AUTISM

danny mahealani stealing the hearts and minds of young and old alike

dylan o'brien being extremely kind by trying his absolute best not to show up all the other actors with his scene-stealing, oscar-worthy performances every second he is on screen and failing miserably.

scott ignoring his phone

mama mcall being so real and a milf

derek's eyebrows being an actual main character

scott auditioning for a new cutting edge reality tv show show called: GIVE ME A NEW PERSONALITY BEFORE SOMEBODY ENDS MY LIFE FOR ME!

boyd being better than everybody else

57% of scenes being filmed in beacon hills high school

41% of scenes being filmed in beacon hills hospital

peter hale, cunt, rocking your world whether you like it or not

(part ii HERE)

[teencopandthesourwolf]

🐺 [a stiles wip]

[teencopandthesourwolf]

so my queue tag here on my TEAM WOOF CENTRAL blog is #a wolf and his queueman which is a bloody terrible pun for the non-phrase "a wolf and his human" which i imagine not a lot of folk even get bc it's bloody terrible. but i love it when dumblr™ is being its extra faulty shitty self and doesn't remember my frequently used tags so i have to rely on my phone's pred text instead and, after i type the letter "a", it recalls the words "wolf", "and", "his" but then always offers up the word "wife" next. like every. single. time. which i think is both funny af and 100% accurate actually. eternal sterek etc

[teencopandthesourwolf]

What if I was a lonely brooding man but my features softened as I stared at you adoringly?

[teencopandthesourwolf]

hello tcats

i hope your day is going good

if you do not mind can i ask you a question? i am fairly new to tumblr and not very fluent in English so i fail to understand some tumblr terms. Can you tell me what does the tags "a wolf and his queueman" means? i have seen other variation of this tag such as "i will queue heavily at you" so what does this actually mean?

thank you

hi nonny! welcome to the dumpster fire that is tumblr dot com and the sterek fandom!

oh my gosh ofc i don't mind you asking :) it's lovely that i was the one you decided to ask! like, i wouldn't call myself a tumblr oracle or anything, but i have been around these parts enough to know a bit about a bit, y'know?

so, for whatever reason (if there is a specific reason that i don't know about somebody who does should absolutely feel free to wade in and enlighten us both) the kool kids on tumblr (read: the nerds) use puns as a fun queue tag for the posts they queue up instead of the ones they post or reblog into the void as soon as they see them.

because i have no idea of your level of understanding of the english language, i'm going to post the oxford dictionary definition of the word 'pun' for any further comprehension that might be needed. i hope you don't take offence at this as i'm really not trying to patronise in any way:

so, lots of us on tumblr will choose either just a random pun that correlates with the word 'queue' i.e. my queue tag for my og main blog from 400 years ago was queue queue ca choo, which was a pun on the beatles lyrics coo coo ca choo from their song i am the walrus. i picked it because it was a (fairly) recognisable line and just something puntastic that i thought would be fun and kind of worked (debatable).

OR

lots of us will pick a queue related pun that is specific to our blog i.e. my queue tag from this teen wolf/sterekblog of mine that you mentioned: a wolf and his queueman. this is actually a really frickin terrible pun but one taken from the sterek fandom because it alludes to the phrase a wolf and his human (meaning derek and stiles)... yeah, i told you it was bad!

to further explain, my buddie blog queue tag is fire and resqueue, bc buddie is from the 911 fandom which is a show about—you guessed it!—fire and rescue!

okies, i hope this helps, nonny? sorry if it's actually a shitty explanation; my brain currently resembles that black gooey shit that seeps out of derek when he gets shot with a wolfsbane bullet bc i've sarcastically had a few very fun few days lol

happy tumbling!

cassidy xp

[teencopandthesourwolf]

stages and different versions of THIS

[teencopandthesourwolf]

stages of THIS

[teencopandthesourwolf]

What do you mean the big, emotionally-stoic man didn't tell you he loved you?? His eyes literally went soft when he glanced your way??

[teencopandthesourwolf]

the thing about stiles is i love him