#addressed to my deadname

[nekhcore]

i fucking LOVE being TRANSGENDER!!!

i LOVE being AMERICAN!!

the credit bureaus keep FUCKING UP my name change despite me providing them all documentation

suddenly i NO LONGER have a fucking FICO score!!

i spent an HOUR on the phone yesterday trying to get someone at experian to fix my split credit report

instead of fixing it they REVERTED the NAME on my ACCOUNT back to my DEADNAME!!

and i STILL cannot see my credit score!!!

[nugatorysheep]

Oh you're in luck I just so happened to draw the perfect response to this earlier today:

You wanna eat my ass so bad come over here and get it lol

(full sketchdump for people who care):

Also that's my deadname ffs. theres a reason it says Ezra on my pinned post let's not be transphobic <3

[reversewerewolf]

hi, i don't do this basically ever but my birthday is in 2 weeks (jan. 28!) and i've run into a never-ending stream of financial trouble since october, so, uh.

i'm linking my amazon wishlist. some of it is frivolous, some of it is for utility, and a lot of it is actually for Puppy. (and if anyone wants to help out with day-to-day stuff like groceries or meds my venm0 is @/jaellery)

i'm always really uncomfortable asking people for things, even indirectly, but maybe it's more acceptable near my birthday, LOL

[timetravelstudies]

customs agents opened the box with harness for my strap btw

[caffeinatedopossum]

Me: I have standards! I'm not the type of person who just falls in love with anyone whose nice to me

Also me whenever someone uses my name: 😳

[a-star-that-fell]

why the hell did i get a giant ass packet of a survey by the us military fuck out of here

[elf-friendly]

uh oh! coworker called me by the wrong name! bad sign!!

[sojo-gatoru]

I really want to tell the hyper conservative ultra christian guy who keeps bothering me to his face that I'm gay and trans and see his head explode

[thepictoblr]

Good news- my parents arent calling me by my dead name anymore. Bad news- "why arent the dishes done" is not how you pronounce my name

[leihaddock]

Shoutout to all the queer folks with email addresses that are their deadnames, too

got me good with this whole email address thing. you make email account as child for one purpose neopets.com and now all this. bait and switch. not nice.

[gillyeowalters]

Because it is the anniversary of his death, I wanted to share a small story about my grandfather.

Before I knew that I was intersex, I identified as a trans man. And I went the way any trans man has to go if he wants to transition in my country. My parents thankfully were supportive but I was afraid to tell my grandparents. My grandparents were German and lived/were raised during the third reich. While both of them never said or acted in a way that suggested that they had fascist views (my grandfather was until he died part of a leftwing political party), but there still was this fear in me. "They are old, they grew up surrounded by abhorrent beliefs...". And then there was my aunt. Who would constantly claim that my grandfather was homophobic.

The problem was, back then, there were no openly out gay people in our area, so I never got the chance to see my grandfather interact with someone who was queer. So I just believed her. Because she was so insistent on it. And because it confirmed my fears and my brain loves to be constantly afraid.

But I knew I wanted to come out. I had to, eventually, because I had stopped my estrogen treatment (back then, I did not know that I got that because I was intersex) and went on testosterone instead and first physical changes began to show. We all lived in one big house, so my grandparents would eventually notice.

I was so afraid that my father at some point offered to talk to his parents. I waited outside in the hallway that led to their kitchen and listened.

My father explained, easy to understand, that I was going to transition from female to male because I felt terrible in my body. My grandfather asked, "Is that why the child* is so depressed all this time?" I had been in and out of multiple clinics for manic depression at that point. My father gave a yes. And my grandmother made the incredibly selfish comment, "Can't that wait until I am dead?"

Before I even got time to be upset, my grandfather slammed his fist down on the table. I had never seen or heard him do anything like that before. He was a very calm and collected man who preferred to leave the room before he got too angry. "No, it can't wait. The child gets to get well now. And if that is what is going to help, then it needs to be done."

From that day on, he never used my deadname again or used the wrong pronouns for me. Sometimes, he would stop in a sentence to think and remind himself, but he did always address me correctly.

He celebrated with me when my name was legally changed. He built the bed frame for me and my boyfriend's bed when we moved in together, just like he had built the first adult sized bedframe for me when I outgrew my small bed. He drove my boyfriend to his chemo sessions because my grandfather also had cancer and knew how terrifying it was to go alone.

Did he fully understand what it means to be intersex? To transition? No. But he understood that one of his loved ones was suffering and that he could help to alleviate that pain. And so he did.

He taught me calligraphy. He taught me how to sew. He taught me bookbinding. He gave me many gifts.

But the biggest gift he gave me was, that when someone hated me for what I am, I could stomach it. Because this man was willing to unlearn the bigotry he had been taught for decades so he could love me for who I am.

*in my grandpa's dialect it was normal to refer to children as just 'the child' (genderless)

EDIT

I was blown away by how many people have reblogged this post. I believe my grandfather would be very happy to see that he can give some hope and love to others even now.

I do not want him to stay faceless; so here is a piece of art I made for his obituary, with a slightly altered quote added now.

Dahlias were his favorite flowers. Orange ones especially. They reminded him of the home he had to flee from as a child.

EDIT 28/03/25

Happy birthday.

[queerb]

Trip to the social security office was relatively painless! Although they really drove that "you will be charged for perjury if anything here is wrong" point real hard

[iridescentis]

okay so the letter that officially diagnoses me with autism has outed me to my doctor. not entirely sure how to feel about that

it's technically my fault I did tell them I use they/them but I wasn't expecting them to use that in official paperwork and change my title to Mx there isn't really another way to interpret that 😭

[brinelakes]

who the hell is trying to brute force the password to my microsoft account

[beroidae]

ngl i think i've let myself get too spoiled when it comes to friendships

[gayboyrocklee]

We got an active support system on Insta