#and I never stay consistent with it
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u kinda have same face syndrome but like that one face is really hot and nicely drawn so it's not even susceptible to criticism
yeha I have like. 4 different types of faces I reuse and it’s coming back to bite me in the ass 😔🙏 at least they’re all hot tho
#ask#bc I draw mouths and eyes so simplified the only defining features are nose and head shape#and I never stay consistent with it#like if you put ford prefect next to oscar oh my the differences are striking#but put say Eiffel and Arthur Dent next to each other and that’s just the same man
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୨⎯ "attention" ⎯୧ (kdh)



+*:🌟:*﹤smut w plot, sub!leehan, edging, riding, exhib+voy themes, reader fem anat, piv sex, flawed characteristics, bit of a scent thing going on / wc: 4.7k / masterlist
✧・゚: *
leehan wants your eyes on him, but you've been so focused on work, leaving early and coming home late. he knows it's important, that you have to finish your project by the deadline, but he can't help but feel a little selfish about your time when you've rarely spoken to him in the past two weeks. he's barely even seen you, always falling asleep despite trying to stay up when you come home, and he's getting antsy missing your company.
you're sliding out of bed after only being home for five hours. he’d startled awake when you came in, but you were too tired to talk, too tired to change before collapsing on the bed.
he’d changed you himself, gently wiping your makeup off and massaging lotion into your skin, then held you close to him as you caught up on much-needed rest. he wakes up when he feels your body heat leave his side, and groans as he watches with foggy eyes as you disappear into the bathroom.
“don’t go to work. stay here with me,” he begs sweetly when you come back out. you consider it, he can see it on your face, but you ultimately shake your head.
“i can’t, baby. gotta get this project done, then i’ll be all yours, m’kay?” he pouts, but it doesn’t last long because you kiss it away and ruffle his already messed up hair. within minutes, you’re out the door.
leehan sulks in bed for a little longer, wishing he could make you pay attention to him. it feels like the only time you’re actually looking at him, thinking about him, is when the two of you are intimate with each other. it’s hard to find time in two busy schedules, but during those rare moments, it’s just you and him; the world around the two of you doesn’t exist anymore.
he’s so warm and safe in bed and the only thing that would make it better is if you were here with him, tangled up in the sheets and wasting the day away. he thinks about your soft skin and how sweet it smells, how warm your touch is when he’s lucky enough to be blessed with it, blessed by your gentle eyes and kind words when they’re focused only on him and spoken just for him to hear.
his hand is traveling under his waistband without hesitation, and thoughts of you clutter his mind as he wraps his palm around his length. he tries to mimic the way you squeeze his base and flick your thumb over his slit, tries to imagine it’s your pretty hands touching him this way. it's not long before stars are dancing behind his eyelids and he’s grunting out into the silent room.
you never want him to cum the first time around, and almost always pull away when he’s on the edge. he’s so used to the denial, to the feeling of his orgasm slipping out of his grasp that it just feels natural when he pulls his hand away from his cock. he sucks in a breath at the way it twitches and sees you, hears you in his imagination, saying, “good boy, aren’t you so well-trained?”
he chews on the inside of his cheek to distract himself from the burning hot need coursing through his veins, and an idea forms in his head. he knows he shouldn’t, but it should be fine, right? just a voice message showing you how much he misses you. you wouldn’t get upset with him for that, surely.
he reaches for his phone on the nightstand and opens you guys’ text messages. he spends another four seconds convincing himself this is a good idea. then he’s grabbing his cock again, pulling all the tricks to put him on the verge of tipping over. when he feels close, he presses the “record a message” button beside the text bar.
at first, it’s just shy little moans as he complains about how much he misses you, how much better it would feel if you were here. then, they turn into desperate, raspy gasps as he pushes himself over the edge. the audio recording sends the second he releases the button, and he can’t unsend it, so he accepts his choices and waits to hear what you have to say.
✧・゚: *✧・゚
the answer is absolutely nothing. you don’t respond to or address the audio recording at all, aside from a smirk and a “did you have fun today?” that you throw his way when you walk through the front door.
he continues doing it, messages ranging from more audio recordings to photos of his stomach painted white, and usually you’ll kiss him, ruffle up his hand, call his “little treats” cute, make more promises to help him out when you’ve met your deadline.
he knows your work is important, but although guilt claws at him for it, leehan still feels a bit hurt that you didn’t take his complaints to heart, just assumed it was another one of his trivial games.
leehan can play games, and when you hole yourself up in the bedroom to type away at your laptop, he realizes that he will. he’ll do whatever it takes to get your attention.
✧・゚: *✧・゚
you finally have a day off, and have decided you’d like to spend part of it at the mall looking through new arrivals. leehan’s not big on shopping, so he just follows you around and occasionally gets distracted by fish merch.
you’ve stepped away at least four times to take phone calls from your coworkers, and you guys have only been at the mall for an hour and a half. when lunchtime rolls around, you excuse yourself again to answer a call from your boss, leaving leehan alone to pick at his food in disinterest.
“um, hi. are you busy?” a feminine voice says. the girl has to stand directly in leehan’s line of sight for him to realize she’s talking to him. when he looks up at her, she smiles shyly and tucks a strand of hair behind her ear.
“can i help you?”
“no! well, yes. i…was just wondering if i could have your phone number. i saw you standing alone earlier…” the girl’s voice fades out as leehan peeps your approaching figure in the distance, and the gears in his head turn with another (probably bad) idea.
“...alone again here in the food court, so i thought i should take the chance.”
leehan didn’t hear most of what she said, but he can tell when someone’s interested in him, and he can play along.
he flashes the girl a charming smile, dimples and all, and nods along to whatever she’s rambling about. she’s cute enough, and seems like a nice girl, but leehan’s real focus is entirely on you as you watch the scene. he watches you as best as he can from his peripheral, but never takes his eyes off the girl in front of him.
“is that…alright?” she says, looking at leehan with wide, hopeful eyes. he pretends to consider whatever she asked, and holds a palm out for her to rest her hand in. her face gets even redder, and he kind of feels bad that he’s using her to get to you.
he’s about to tell her that he’s sorry to disappoint, and that he appreciates it, he really does, but he has a girlfriend. he doesn’t get a chance to say any of that when you come up behind him seemingly out of nowhere and tap him on the shoulder. the girl pulls her hand away from leehan’s and stands around awkwardly.
“what do you think you’re doing?” you ask. your arms are crossed and your eyes are locked on his, but not with the love and admiration he’s been longing for. his composure falters when he sees your expression, one that says he’s fucked up more than he knows.
“this girl came up to me and…” he trails off and gestures in the girl’s general direction.
“and?” you ask impatiently, but leehan doesn’t know how he was going to conclude that sentence. this girl came up to me and i pretended to be interested to get a rise out of you? he has a feeling that’s not going to support his case well. you turn away from him and to the girl behind him, causing him to turn around as well.
“you’ll have to excuse my idiot boyfriend. i’m sorry he wasted your time instead of just telling you he was taken.” the girl nods in understanding and tries to hide her disappointed pout. she accepts your handshake when you offer it and hurries off.
you shoot leehan another pissed glare, then dump your remaining food in the trash and walk out of the mall. he considers apologizing to the girl as well, but she’s already out of sight, so he trashes his own food and trails after you with a ball of shame sitting in his throat.
✧・゚: *✧・゚
to be honest, you scare leehan just a little, especially when he knows you’re angry with him but you’re not talking about it. he’d rather you just chew his head off and get it over with, just tell him how much of an inconsiderate dumbass he is. you don’t, so the guilt manifests and manifests until he feels like he might puke it up.
you lock the front door and hang up your coat, and the first thing you say to him in the last twenty minutes is “sit.”
leehan parks his ass on the couch immediately, and waits to hear whatever other command you might give him. he expects you to sit next to him, or on the armchair by the couch or even on his lap. he doesn’t expect you to sit right across from him on the coffee table. at least a minute passes full of you just staring at him, and the silence is killing him.
“baby–”
“shut up,” you say, and his mouth clamps shut. you stare at him for a few more seconds, poking your inner cheek with your tongue in thought. then, you shake your head and laugh in disbelief. leehan watches as you cross your arms over your chest, and tries not to flick his eyes down to the way your boobs are being pushed up. he may be sick with horniness and loneliness, but it’s really not the time.
“why are you acting like this, leehan?” it takes leehan a few seconds and a quirk of your eyebrow to realize you’re actually waiting for an answer, that you want him to speak now.
“what do you mean?” that’s his intelligent response. you scoff and roll your eyes.
“don’t act dense with me. you were flirting with that girl just so i’d see. i know when you’re acting out for attention, and that’s exactly what you’ve been doing this entire week.” leehan’s embarrassed at being caught so he shakes his head in denial, but it’s nowhere near convincing even to himself.
“no? you didn’t touch yourself and record it for me? didn’t send me photos of you covered in your own cum? didn’t flirt with a girl right in my face in a desperate attempt to get my attention?” leehan’s cheeks burn at the direct confrontation. hearing his actions out loud brings a fresh wave of shame over him, and he’s so ready to get down on his knees and beg for forgiveness.
“show me.”
leehan’s eyes fly wide open and he lets out a nervous chuckle. “w-what?”
“you wanted my attention so bad. now you have it,” you say with a bored expression. your eyes leave a trail of fire wherever they land on his skin. he has your attention, and has to think of a way to keep it.
“go ahead,” you command with a jerk of your head. your lips are turned down into a frown, and it’s so condescending, like you don’t even want to be here. leehan needs you to want to be here, and he’s nothing if not a performer. he lifts his hips and tugs his pants down to his thighs.
you make a noise, something between a hum and a coo, when he pulls his boxers down and his dick springs against his stomach.
“your little cock is hard, hannie.” he knows he’s not small, but your words are still humiliating, and still burn the need to impress you across his skin. “gonna show me how you fucked yourself when you were moaning into your phone?”
leehan’s hips buck against nothing, causing his member to slap against his stomach again, and his mouth falls open with a groan.
he does as you tell him, wrapping his hand around his cock like he’s been doing every morning for the past week, squeezing his base, flicking his tip, imagining it’s you, wishing it was you, but he doesn’t dare ask. instead he watches your facial expressions, how your lips curl up into a smirk when he’s close.
“stop,” you tell him, and he pulls his hand away without question. he would’ve been foolish to not expect the sensation of his orgasm floating farther and farther away from him. he tries to slow his breathing, tries not to lose his mind so early into this session.
“keep going.”
he continues his previous pace immediately, and his hips tremble when he tries to stop them from bucking up. his tip is a bit more sensitive when he brushes his thumb across it, and it takes less time for him to get close.
he strokes a bit faster, moans a bit louder. he has no idea how long you plan to keep him here, but he still anticipates the relief of falling off the edge.
“let go.”
leehan pulls his hand away from his cock and clutches the couch instead while willing his legs to stop shaking. he’s helpless to disobey you, but he groans as his orgasm escapes him a second time.
“hm…i dunno. something’s not right.” you tap a manicured nail against your chin in thought. he can never understand how you’re so composed in moments like this, like it’s a normal evening. if you’re turned on, you don’t show it, and it makes leehan flush with shame. “what do you think, baby boy?”
he huffs out a laugh at the question. how is he supposed to know? but you’re looking at him expectantly, so he scrambles to come up with something. “i mean– usually i’m, like, in bed, i guess. thinking about you, imagining you, smelling you…” god, don’t get him started on smelling you.
you hum thoughtfully and lift off of the table. in seconds, you’re hovering over him, flashing him a devious grin. your hips are so close to straddling his, and you slap his hand away when it reaches up to touch your waist. you hold yourself up by the back cushions with your arms on either side of his head. he’s trapped, and suddenly, everything else in the room is overshadowed by you.
“is that right? you think about all the dirty things you wanna do to me while getting off to the smell of my perfume?”
of course you’d know his weak spot. you’re so close to him and he thinks he’s going to lose his mind if he doesn’t get to touch you. your perfume is invading his senses, and flaming hot desire coils in his abdomen. he squeezes his eyes shut to prevent them from rolling into his skull as his hips twitch into the air.
“touch yourself, hannie,” you say sweetly.
he takes a deep breath and grabs his cock again. he’s known to leak like a faucet, especially after meeting you, and his hand is covered in sticky white within the first few seconds of stroking himself.
he knows there’s raspy noises falling from his open mouth, but he can barely hear them over his heart pounding. the way you take over his brain is overwhelming and he can hardly think. your lips graze his neck, and the skin litters with goosebumps despite the hot air between the two of you.
if he opens his eyes, he’s got a face full of titties, and he doesn’t know if he can handle that despite every cell in his body telling him to look. he wants to be good for you and hold out until you give him permission to stop, but it feels so good that he’s speeding his hand up.
“ha– ah, fuck–” slick, sloppy sounds fill the room as he works himself to the edge for you.
“let go,” you whisper in his ear. his hand rips away from his cock and grips onto his thigh instead, getting it wet and gross with precum. it takes what feels like an eternity for him to back away from the precipice this time. fear runs his blood cold when he realizes he almost didn’t last.
he’s always good for you, can edge himself for as long as you'd like. he doesn’t know why he’s sensitive today, especially after spending a week beating it.
you pull your face out of his neck, and he slumps against the couch. you smile at the sight and caress his cheek. he melts into the touch, but you pull away to card through his tangled hair instead. you used the grip on his strands to tilt his head back so that he’s looking up at you.
“i do think you were louder that time. moaned just like you did in those recordings.” he opens his mouth to say something, but loses his train of thought when you plop down on his lap.
“fffuck–” he moans, voice all pathetic and high-pitched.
“stay still,” you warn when his hips buck into yours, and he tries so hard, but even the soft fabric of your skirt is too rough on his sensitive dick. he struggles to keep his eyes open, but he’d rather die than take them off of you, so he blinks through the tears pooling in his waterline. the action causes the tears to trickle down, and the air is cold against his wet cheeks.
you stay like that until his breaths are more even and he’s somewhat calmed down. he lets out a displeased noise when you lift off of him and sit back on the coffee table.
“c’mon, hannie. i’m not done with you yet. let me see.” you push his legs apart with your knee. he looks down with you, and the sight makes him burn with embarrassment. he’s leaking so much it’s soaking into the couch, and it’s another sight he has to squeeze his eyes shut to get away from.
“w-what, are you j-just gonna–” he swallows thickly, clears his throat, and tries again. “how long are you gonna make me do this?”
you tilt your head and smile at him like you aren’t melting his brain into goo. “however long it takes for you to learn your lesson.” leehan whines a little in protest.
“just wanted you to look at me, missed you so much.”
the look in your eyes softens and you lean forward to place a heartfelt kiss on his lips. “i missed you too, hannie. so. much,” you say, cupping his cheeks and pressing more gentle kissing around his face. “it was so hard to focus at work when you kept sending me those treats. but bad boys still have to take their punishments, yeah?” leehan sighs longingly and nods, resting his head against the back cushions, and reaching for his cock when you instruct him to start over.
✧・゚: *✧・゚
by the fifth denial, he’s a shaking mess, falling apart at the seams and only holding himself together by your command. he’s done for the second you flip your skirt up, slide your panties off, circle your clit right in front of him. you’re so close but so far, and he’s definitely losing his mind.
“please– n/n, let me…could fuck you so good,” he begs helplessly, deep voice strained and words stringing together. it’s the first time tonight you actually look interested in what’s happening, and he can’t figure out where to look–at your pretty face as you make yourself feel good, at the wetness leaking out of your pulsing heat, at the way your tits shake when you tug at your nipples. you’re biting your lip to keep quiet, keeping your pretty noises to yourself. leehan thinks that’s the cruelest part of this punishment.
his hips are fucking up into his hand in a sloppily, a stark contrast to his usually controlled thrusts. he’s not easy to turn into a mess, but you know him better than he knows himself. you know his limits, know that he won’t cum unless you tell him to, know how badly he needs your forgiveness.
“i’m sorry, i’m sorry, just fuck me, please?” but you’re not looking at him. your eyes are focused on his cock drooling all over his legs, at the way it twitches when he’s close. your hips twitch, and your cunt drools on the table, and his mouth runs dry. he’s too delirious to figure out if your reactions are because of him, if he’s doing good for you.
“stop, pretty boy.”
his hand trembles as he pulls it away from his dick and flops it against the couch. he gasps harshly, heaves loudly, and more tears stream down his face as his hips chase friction that’s already gone.
his head is leaning against the back cushions and lolled to the side, but he’s still watching you touch yourself. his mouth hangs open from all of his pathetic begging, and there’s a thin trail of saliva pooling in his mouth and dribbling onto his t-shirt.
his eyelids are so heavy, but he watches brainlessly as you tease your opening, dip a finger into the heat. it comes back out drenched in creamy white, and he has to dig his nails into the cushion to stop himself from grabbing his dick without permission.
you pull your hands away from your body and straddle him again. he nearly goes cross-eyed when your bare cores touch. it’s so wet, and his entire body shivers with need.
“aw, hannie. look at me. tell me what you want.”
“mm, want– wanna taste you, wanna fuck you so bad.” you giggle, and he loses himself somewhere between your sparkly eyes and shiny lips.
“wanna taste me?” you reaffirm, and he nods dumbly. you straighten his head up and cup his cheeks between your fingers and thumb. you make him watch as you use your free hand to repeat the motions, gathering your wetness on your finger, pushing it through your opening and pulling it out.
you whimper out freely this time, and the sound is so pretty and sinful leehan wishes he could tattoo it on his brain, wishes he had recorded it so he can hear it again later. your hand forces his lips to pucker and his mouth to open, and you press your wet fingers onto his tongue.
leehan’s eyes roll again, and his eyebrows crease as the taste of you, the smell of you invades his senses. you always taste so good, so sweet to him.
his eyes focus on you again, but his vision clouds and his hips buck up against you. you slide against him so deliciously, but it’s over too soon when you slide your fingers out of his mouth and pry your hips away from his.
you wipe your wet fingers on his shirt and remind him to look at you, but he is already looking at you, has barely torn his eyes away from you in the last thirty minutes.
he’s completely awestruck, and maybe a little delirious when he swears he can see the faint halo hovering above your head. he tries to tell you how perfect, how much of an angel you are, but his words come out jumbled and unintelligible.
“do you have a color for me, baby?”
“mhm, fuck– green, n-need you so bad. ’m so sorry, p-please, you look so beautiful, t–”
you interrupt him by pressing your lips against his, and leehan’s convinced he would’ve been talking for the rest of his life if you hadn’t. he’s pretty sure he melts into a puddle of goo when your lips collide, yours so perfect and plush against his. any function his brain is still performing shuts down immediately, and you have to handle the kiss by yourself, because his lips are slack and useless against yours. there’s a string of saliva connecting the two of you when you pull away from him.
“i think my pretty boy’s at his limit, hm?” you ask, and he doesn’t really know what you’re saying, but anything sounds good coming from you, so he nods and watches with his jaw on the floor as you stand up and pull your skirt off. you pull his shirt off as well, and you’re both bare and vulnerable but safe in your own world, just as leehan longed for.
you cup his cheeks again and hold his face so he can look up at you as you sink down on his cock, and the noise he makes when you bottom out is broken and pitiful even to his own ears. he knows he must look so fucked out and stupid, but you’re looking at him with so much love in your eyes that he’s sure he looks beautiful anyway.
you wrap around him so well, your cunt is so tight. it feels like he’d forgotten how it feels to be buried inside you, and to be experiencing it for the first time again has to be parallel to some sort of spiritual ascension. leehan doesn’t know what he did to deserve it, but he does know he’d spend an eternity here if you allowed it.
your hands move to grip his shoulders, and you make the most heavenly face of ecstasy leehan has ever seen. you lift your hips to slide him out, and bottom out again. your cunt’s sucking him in so greedily, and he doesn’t know how much longer he can keep this up.
“i’ll let you cum if you fuck me, pretty boy,” you say like you read his mind. you grab his lifeless hands and place them on your waist, then grip the back of the couch again. he gets the message clearly, holding you in place as he jerks into you. his thrusts aren’t coordinated at all, and it’s out of pure habit when he angles his hips to fuck right into your sweet spot.
“fuck yeah, hannie. that’s so good, you’re so good,” you moan out, and he uses strength he barely has to aim for that spot, to hear those words from you again. on a particularly hard thrust, your eyes flutter closed.
“look at me, n/n. please– look at me,” he begs, voice cracking, and when you do, your eyes are glossy, tears pulling in your waterline. it’s so hot, and finally, your attention is his, and he’s making you feel good, but he’s not gonna last like this.
“you fill me up so good, hannie. make me feel so good,” you say breathlessly, eyes locked on his. “gonna cum for me? gonna fill me up nicely?” and he’s nodding, pitiful whimpers falling from his lips, whatever you say.
you trail a hand up his abdomen, to his chest, and tug at his nipple. the rush of pleasure he feels is so intense that the knot in his stomach is fraying and snapping so quickly he can’t even warn you, but he tries through strangled gasps: “cumming, ‘m, fu–”
✧・゚: *✧・゚
it takes leehan a while to come back to earth. he’s so tired he can barely move, but you kiss him until his mind returns home. after asking if he’s okay five times and getting five verbal “yes’s,” you clean the two of you up and lead him to bed.
it’s still when he speaks again, eyes searching for yours in the dark room, “i really am sorry, y/n. i should’ve been more considerate. i respect your work so much, i just got so lonely…” you smile at him softly and reach a hand up to rub circles into his back.
“i’m sorry you were so lonely, hannie. i should’ve managed my time better, should’ve taken your feelings more seriously. from now on, i’ll keep work at work, and after my project, we can both take time off and go on a vacation. how’s that?”
“that’s perfect,” he says, and means it wholeheartedly, falling asleep with a smile of his own.
✧・゚: *
a/n : FUCK THIS TOOK FOREVER TO WRITE LOL i reread it three times pls lmk if there r still typos <3
#i played no part in editing that leehan photo props to whoever made it#my warnings are literally never consistent it is not my fault i have adhd#i stayed up until 4 am writing this but it was worth every second#do u guys see the way im cranking out ffs like#i have many ideas and probably an overactive imagination#but hopefully i dont burn out i love writing ff </3#i poured so many of my leehan hcs into this it was very fun#boynextdoor hard thoughts#boynextdoor hard hours#leehan hard thoughts#leehan hard hours#boynextdoor imagines#leehan imagines#boynextdoor smut#leehan smut#boynextdoor x reader#leehan x reader#fics: leehan 👽.ᐟ
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tbh the level of difficulty I experience in trying to dress myself in a way where I feel fashionable and like I’m expressing myself is directly causing me extreme body image issues. and dysphoria. I feel like I would be in considerably less distress over my body every single day if I could just WEAR COOL CLOTHES.
#can’t afford it now but one day i’ll have enough money and spoons to go through with all that effort of creating a wardrobe#i keep gaining weight consistently every year that things I bought last summer no longer fit & that’s not helping.#i never stay the same size long enough to collect clothing
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mage viktor discourse again on twitter and all i can say in my little corner over here once again is, I don't know why the entire fandom takes it as canon that mage Viktor failed to save every world he manipulated.
Canon does not provide evidence of this. This is fanon speculation. It's a fine headcanon to have, but everyone talks about it like it's canon when it isn't. Canon is ambiguous about the outcome of the timelines mage Viktor altered. The little nods we are given point, in my opinion, towards the opposite conclusion, that he successfully averted destruction.
I've written meta on this before but in summary:
1) 'In all timelines, in all possibilities' is worded precisely, it's not 'out of all timelines'; the implication is that every time, Jayce brings Viktor back from the brink, not just in our timeline. 'Only you' doesn't refer to our timeline's Jayce, it refers to all Jayces. Jayce always brings him home. If Viktor continuously put the fate of each timeline in Jayce's hands and Jayce failed over and over, I don't think he'd say those words. And the way he says them matters. His words are tinged with wonder, not sorrow. As if over and over again, he is shown that Jayce saves him, and it continues to amaze him. He doesn't sound defeated, like this is the next in a long line of Jayces he's sending off to die. The feeling is that Viktor's faith in Jayce has not been misplaced.
2) If mage Viktor doomed every timeline, there would be hundreds (or more) mage Viktors. All running around manipulating timelines. I highly doubt the writers wanted to get into that kind of sticky situation. The tragedy of mage Viktor is that he is singular. Alone. Burdened with the responsibility of the multiverse. The emotional gut punch of his fate is ruined if other timelines led to the same outcome, and from a practical standpoint, having multiple reality-bending omniscient mages would rip apart the fabric of the arcane.
There are other points, such as there being only one corrupted Mercury Hammer and our Jayce is the only one to receive it, and the fact that if mage Viktor is as omniscient as he is implied to be, he could easily step back into other timelines and correct course, because it's highly unlikely he could sit still and watch things go down in flames. But these things can be argued elsewhere.
While I love conversations about mage Viktor's motives and selfishness vs altruism, the writers & artbook have expressed that Jayce and Viktor care greatly about Runeterra and want to fix their mistakes to save it, and that their reconciliation is symbolic of Piltover and Zaun coming together as well. Yes, they make disastrous decisions towards each other, making choices for the other or without the other, which has negative consequences for their relationship and for Runeterra - but I think fandom pushes their selfishness even past what's canon sometimes, as if their entire goal hadn't always been to selflessly help the world around them. Their final reconciliation is about bridging the gap that grew between them - the pain and grief and secrets, betraying themselves and each other - to mutually choose each other openly and honestly. Part of the beauty of their story, as expressed by the creators, is that in their final moments, they chose each other and took responsibility for their actions by sacrificing themselves to end what they started, together - and that choosing each other saved the world. TPTB have stated this - that Jayce and Viktor are the glue holding civilization together, and when they come back to each other, they can restore balance. It's when they're apart, when they hurt each other and miscommunicate, when they abandon their commitment to each other and their dream, that the greater world suffers. Their strife is mirrored in the story-world at large.
Mage Viktor is framed as a solitary penitent figure, damned to an eternity of atoning for his mistakes. He paid the ultimate price and now is forced to live his personal nightmare of exactly what he was trying to avoid for himself with the glorious evolution. The narrative clues we're given point more in the direction that he saves timelines rather than dooms them. If Viktor's actions kept killing Jayce, the very boy he couldn't bear to not save each time, it would undermine these narrative choices. Yes, Viktor couldn't stand to live in a world where he never meets Jayce, so he ensures it keeps happening. But in that same breath, he couldn't bear to see a world where his actions continue to destroy Jayce and destroy Runeterra. His entire arc in s2 is born of his selfless desire to help humanity, help individual people. He would not lightly destroy entire worlds. That's his original grief multiplied a thousandfold, and narratively it would lessen the impact of the one, true loss he did suffer, his own Jayce. It wouldn't make sense for him to be alright with damning other timelines to suffer the same catastrophic tragedy that created him. I mean, maybe I'm delusional here, but is that not the entire point? Because that's what I took away when I watched the show.
As I said, I love discussions about mage Viktor, as there's a lot to play with. All I wish is that the fandom at large would not just assume or accept the Mage Viktor Dooms Every Timeline idea as canon, when there is nothing in the actual canon that confirms this. Maybe people need to just, go back and rewatch the actual episode, to recall how mage Viktor is presented to us, and what it's implied we're supposed to take away from his scenes, and separate that from the layers of headcanon the fandom has constructed.
#arcane#mage viktor#jayvik#viktor arcane#meta#this is like. along the same vein as 'jayce knew all along viktor would go to the hexgates during the final battle'#like that is a headcanon. we don't know that!!#the actual scene could be read either way and i know when i watched it that's not how i interpreted it#and i doubt it's how most casual viewers intrepeted it#fandom gets so deep into itself after a show ends that you really have to just. rewatch the show to recalibrate yourself lol#for all that people bicker about mage viktor yall dont include him in your fics v much lol#anyway i love mage viktor and he's probably my favorite version of viktor <3#i just wish fandom stopped insisting on a monolithic view of canon#and the idea that mage viktor fucked over hundreds of timelines to collect data points like a scientist is just#rubs me the wrong way as a scientist lol#you do realize that scientists don't treat everything in life like a science experiment right?#it's about inquisitiveness and curiosity. not 'i will approach this emotional thing from a cold and calculating standpoint'#viktor has never been cold and calculating. he's consistently driven by emotion in the show jfc please rewatch canon#i just think that people would benefit from a surface level reading once in a while lol#sometimes fandom digs so far into the minutiae that they forget the overarching takeaways that the story presents#assuming there must be some hidden meaning that sometimes (like this) is decided to be the literal opposite of what's presented#rewatch mage viktor's scenes and ask yourself if 'deranged destroyer of worlds' is really what the show was trying to have you take away#then again there seems to be a faction of this fandom that for some absurd reason thinks jayce was forced to stay and die with viktor#so i guess media illiteracy can't be helped for some lmao#i post these things on here because my twitter posts get literally 10 views thanks algorithm#so the chunk of the fandom i really want to see this will not#but i must speak my truth
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I have a question about the jp server pickups, since I really want knight Sebek, but I’m trying to save gems for bloom malleus + the 3rd tsum event that’s gonna show up sooner or later. Iirc, after knight Sebek, the next story update’s pickup had all of the previous story cards (ie cerberus Ortho, general Lilia, and knight Sebek). Is this true, and if it is, did it include a token system like the dorm pickups where you can just do 100 pulls and then buy the specific card you want directly? Because if that is how it works, then I can wait until then and be sure I won’t have to go to 200 for him.
we did indeed get a second chance at those three when 7-7 came out! I'm pretty sure there was not a token system -- though admittedly I don't 100% remember, sorry! 🙇 I took a quick search through some past posts/videos from people who tend to include the gacha and news stuff, but I didn't see any mention of it, so I'm inclined to think there really wasn't one. :( they were all separate pickups with their own pull counts rather than a combined one, if that info helps at all.
speaking as a strict f2p who hoards keys/gems like the lovechild of a dragon and a magpie, given the choice between saving for a story card and a birthday card, I'd go for story -- it does require a lot of patience, but there are way more opportunities to get past birthday cards, both from the anniversary events and the rerun pickups! tsums is a bit harder to say anything on because Eng doesn't follow the same event schedule, but it's a longish event and those pickups let you have a free 10-roll, so I think they're also a bit easier to save up for.
(ALSO speaking of free rolls, starting with the fifth round of birthdays -- the kutsurogi my room ones -- the birthday boy/union jacket/bloom cards have had a separate pickup that you can get two free 10-pulls at by doing missions! I got a bloom Jade from it a couple weeks ago. :D meanwhile general Lilia is the only story card I've ever managed to pull, so...I'm probably kinda biased. whoops.)
#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 6 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 6 spoilers#joseimuke games are serious business#just speculating for a moment here#i could be completely wrong about all of this it's just me spitballin'#i suspect we WILL get a rerun pickup for the 7-7 and up story cards at some point#but probably not a third round of the diasomnia story boys :(#we never got a proper dorm rerun for them so i think we'll get that instead#but also that makes me wonder if we're going to maybe not get a story silver card after all...#because like#i realized earlier that since we've been getting main story drops pretty consistently every two months#(we had july + august in a row but september + october were for halloween so it averages out)#if we continue this way that means heartslabyul in january and return to diasomnia in march#which would be timed PERFECTLY for the fifth anniversary#it absolutely could just be a coincidence but. idk. i could see it being a fun place to end 7 on.#(i still think we're getting an episode 8 with grim. just. y'know. the TIMING)#but if that turns out to be true then there might not be time for a silver story card AND dorm reruns...#i mean i'm 100% talking out my butt here so i could be entirely wrong about all of it#(stay tuned for six months straight of training camp events and master chef reruns instead)#i just really want a silver story card okay#we've gotten so much silver angst and yet i demand MORE#unsuspecting anon: hey ego do you remember if there were tokens for the --#me: UUUURGH DELICIOUS SILVER TEARS#(sorry anon) (good luck with whoever you choose to pull for though! your taste in cards is excellent and i understand the dilemma 😭)
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C’mon Raph, don’t noogie the elderly
(Or: finally, communication)
#extended stay au#art#fanart#digital art#tmnt#tmnt 2003#donatello#raphael#sainw au#sainw#gijinka#TIME TO RAMBLE:#so of course I had to continue dons allergy to sitting like a normal person#even though it made this WAY harder than it needed to be#and I will never have one of those super consistent art styles so each panel is a lil bit off lmao#they’re watching football together like in canon :]#ALSO THE SHOW MAKES THE COLORS IN THE LAIR WORK BUT CHRIST THE COUCH AND WALL COMBO IS GRATING TO LOOK AT#WHY IS IT DARK TEAL#NOW ONTO PLANS and a lil treat for y’all who read these#the next comic is already underway and it’s going to be a multi parter#AND I’m drawing them AS turtles in it so canon designs#AND there’s conflict#mikey fans rejoice#I have part 1 sketched out but I wanna do some. actual writing. to make sure the timeline fits and to deal w multiple things at once#ITS A BIG UNDERTAKING FOR ME#also calling don old is so funny to me cause I’m 25 that’s basically me
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walking through lucanis' mind prison. the tam lin of it all
#his mind keeps changing forms and you just have to show him you won't let go of him#it doesn't even really matter what you say to him just that you're consistently there to say it. your voice is a comfort. im in pain#I'm having so many feelings about like... rook can't be here. because of all things in the world rook means 'safe'. what if I exploded#what if I just shattered into a thousand pieces and was swept away by the wind actually#'it's better that I stay here than risk losing you' is such pitch perfect trauma logic. freeze logic specifically#on some level he seems to think he keeps rook safe like. existentially. by staying here#it's heartbreaking child magical thinking that makes me wonder like. has he basically been in a place like this inside#ever since his parents died? before that? the ossuary is just new set dressing the underlying logic is OLD. and very very sad to me#'I keep everyone safe by staying here'#(and then the perfect hilarity of having an actual demon be like 'ROOK. YOU TALK TO HIM HE NEVER LISTENS TO ME'#tfw your inner demon gets worried enough to stage an intervention and get you therapy whether you want it or not lmao)#dragon age#dragon age spoilers#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age: the veilguard#rook x lucanis#lucanis dellamorte#rookanis#rye staying mostly in gentle professional mode for this one b/c this is literally his training#('I may not be batting a hundred at being a person but I DO know how to deal with fade shenanigans! not to worry I've got you')#except in that last part with the illario mind ghost where he roundaboutly admits 'I need you I don't know how to do this without you'#in rye speak that is very big it's like. third base of his soul or something. we do not ask for things for ourselves in this house#(because we already know we will not receive anyway so that sounds both humiliating and ultimately pointless. no thank you!)#and yet. the things we'll admit for love#the feeling that some of the things varric did for rye immediately post-exile rye is paying forward with lucanis now. don't look at me
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Cole!Trip’s anger is different from every other Trip’s anger. I think of it like a blue flame. It’s not as huge and consistent as other Trips’ anger is, which I think of as an orange flame. His Trip’s anger is quieter and more hidden behind a trained facade, but when you get too close or he gets too caught up and consumed by it, it’s hotter and more dangerous. But he works to keep it under wraps. Instead of immeditaly going to violence, he tries to shut down instead. Like in JFT when Marcia gets up and goes to Cherry, he shoves his hands into his pockets and maybe balls them into fists cause he feels the anger coming but he knows it’s best to just shut down. But then suddenly Paul is yelling and Cherry is denying and blaming them instead of the kid who stabbed Bob and it’s like gas is being thrown into what is normally his small and hot flame. Suddenly it’s like it’s exploding. It becomes a huge and blazing fire that consumes and burns everything in its path.
#basically I think of his anger as a blue flame#cause they’re smaller but hotter#his anger simmers for a while#it’s like a pot with a lid on it#it’s carefully controlled#until suddenly it’s overflowing and there’s nothing you can do to stop it#it’s under his control until suddenly it isn’t#it’s under his control until JFT when suddenly it’s growing and engulfing everything#it’s burning people he doesn’t mean for it to#I think the best one I can contrast him to is Henry!Trip#Henry Trip’s anger is an orange flame#it’s tall and it burns if you get anywhere near close to it#it’s maybe not the hottest but it’s constant presence makes up for that#his anger is consistent#he doesn’t hide the anger but rather uses it to mask other feelings#instead of shutting down he explodes#but eventually his anger is over and things might be scalded but they’re not disintegrated#that’s how he gets Marcia to stay#she gets burned but it’s never too much to make her run away#until suddenly it’s like his flame just won’t back down at all#versus Cole Trip who gets Marcia to stay because of all of their good moments#all of the times when his flame was covered and she could just feel the warmth and passion without the dangerous burn#idk#maybe I’m just trying to over metaphor it#the outsiders musical#the outsiders broadway#terrence dipp#trip the outsiders
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Pop quiz, hotshots! Which would you rather have:
A relationship that, when it goes wrong, you can tell the other person that you need a break to reassess your relationship, and they will discuss this calmly, let you go, and then go away and think about what you said, agree that they were in the wrong, and start working on ways to fix their own behaviour;
OR
A relationship that, when you want to leave, they tell you that you don't really want to go, that you're happier with them, that you should isolate yourself from your family and friends so you can stay with them - and when you disagree and tell them the relationship is just a matter of necessity, they start in on your other relationship (which they have apparently decided is the reason you're going back, despite you making no mention of it), telling you that it's broken, that you shouldn't go back to him - and when you tell them to butt out of your personal business, they tell you they're entitled to have an opinion because you've been stranded alone together for a long time...
Is that or is that not what happened? Because I remember Lila making herself pretty clear on these points, but apparently a bunch of people think we should disregard a woman's expressed opinion about her own life, and go with what she's being told. Because Five knows best, amirite? Gosh he's so smart and clever! And he deserves this - he deserves Lila, no matter what Lila herself says. He's owed it by the universe, because he had a bad life.
Lila did have another relationship like that, where she was told what to do, kept in the dark, told that the other person knew what was best for her...and it wasn't Diego.
#lila pitts#diego hargreeves#tua#tua s4#tua s4 spoilers#the umbrella academy#I don't mind them portraying unhealthy relationships#but I am 100% serious when I say you shouldn't romanticise that shit#just because you think Five is dreamy#sure Diego has his flaws#but he and Lila had an adult relationship where they both made choices#and they consistently take on board what the other one says#whereas apparently Five and Lila never once had a conversation about where this was(n't) heading#because they were at total odds when it finally came down to a decision#never mind Diego - did Five actually think she was going to forget about her kids just to stay there with him?!#the arrogance! he was acting like a 20yo in his first real relationship#and Lila was acting like a woman making the best of a bad situation#wanting to end it as soon as she was able - literally she got up and walked away the second she found out#it's not about 'cheating' or whatevs#(all of tua fandom needs to grow up about that one)#it's about Five being a toxic little shit#enough red flags to run a circus#pepper gets salty
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messy snm sketches
#was thinking a lot about max basically using sam as a fidget toy when he’s staying still#i will also never draw sam consistently ever#sam and max#sam and max fanart#snm#fanart#freelance husbands#my art
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I think a truly controversial supergirl opinion I have is that (pre-crisis) kara's feelings for querl are not nearly as strong as the feelings querl has for her, and she'd never leave everybody that she knows and loves behind just to permanently stay in the future and be his girlfriend.
#i say ''controversial'' bc i see the take all the time that kara should just drop everything and be a part of the legion full-time#and it's like. why. literally why.#she was never even a consistently active member of the team!#everytime brainy asked her to stay she said no! she had shit to figure out in her own time!#brainy was screaming crying and throwing up whenever she left while kara was living it up in the 70s/80s without another thought!#he was her first love — her childhood sweetheart#but i'm just not invested in them beyond that#try as i might!! and i have tried!! i just can't bring myself to care about the two of them together like that
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Morro design + a ton of notes.
#alek art#lego ninjago#ninjago#morro wu#lloyd garmadon#featured !#2024#the colors are soooo not going to stay consistent. just because i dont really work with green... ever... not the most happy with these#i need to do a ton of redraws its actually really fun... might open rqs#i know he was 15-20 when he died and its said he was a little younger than the ninja when it happened . and during s5 i see them as#18-20 so i will put him at 19 just because he gives 19 year old vibes (???)#i think i talked about the wings before. they can flap!! he does have ears !!! dont ask how it works. ninjago doesnt make sense#i say this when im the one overthinking how all their powers work and robot schematics. oops#i finished s5 .. i think we'll watch s6 tonight (queueing this on the 14th for reference) so prepare for stuff from that#art was kicking my ass and then i drew morro and all was fixed. morro my new muse ? i cant wait for day of the departed special#FUN FACT ive never seen it. and i like morro so im like itching for it dude. hes so mal core isk
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I do sometimes sit and wonder how things would have turned out if the QSMP eggs had been removed after a month exactly as originally intended. So much would have been different . I wonder if the QSMP would have still been around?
#qsmp#genuinely just pondering#i know for one that there are a few people who would have played more consistently if they were gone#we probably would have got more rubius and mariana#its possible that hideduo might not have happened? even though ramon wasnt there for most of their arc he still had big impact on fits lore#so that might have been different#there probably would have been more collaborative events#the minimes would have had a chance to shine#cellbit and roier might never have married#the original federation lore would have almost certainly stayed on track and not got nearly as messy#idk if there's anything else you can think of that would have changed let me know#it's interesting to think about
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Weird thing in my computer
#my art#deltarune fanart#deltarune#kris dreemurr#sometimes i like to draw a little kris for fusnies#they never stay a consistent style in my head#but this thing can fit SO much moodiness in em
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See, regardless the intention with the new Nosferatu what I see over and over especially on Twitter with -no joke- over 400,000 likes are posts about how all this happened because Thomas was way too invested in getting a promoyion instead of staying home and fucking his wife
I mean, it's hard to have sex with your wife if you don't have a home. just saying.
Really, though, the victim blaming going on with these takes makes me so frustrated. Even IF we ignore that Orlok already knows Ellen and feels entitled to her, even IF we ignore that he is doggedly determined (now that she's married to someone else) to show up and reclaim her for good - Thomas. Had. No. Choice.
Not to rant at you, anon, just using your ask to go off on this narrative.
The thing is - Thomas is already in debt at the start. That it's to his friend doesn't matter to Thomas. Honestly it might make the debt seem even worse. He is indebted to Harding financially, he and Ellen are not off to the most secure start, he's already been away for a while due to the honeymoon - this actually is vitally important for them. He needs his job. He was already late - if he hadn't been so late or hadn't realized it, he likely would have stayed home longer. But he couldn't. Then when he's offered this big, lucrative deal, he can't refuse it. Knock commenting about 'if you close this sale, you're job is guaranteed' isn't just tempting him with success, it's also threatening him with failure.
What happens if Ellen relapses and they're destitute? What happens if Ellen is having her seizures again, the sleepwalking, the melancholy, what if it gets worse? Ellen of course is still in the sweet honeymoon phase and thinks that love will be enough to stave those things off because so far Thomas' mere presence and affection has worked. But the thing is, that high is going to come back down. It happens in even the most wholesome and genuine of relationships, and stress - especially financial stress - will not do them any favors. Will not do her and her mental health and her attempts to keep her bond with Orlok suppressed any good whatsoever. I mean, that's basically what is happening in the film. The more they struggle financially, the more desperate things get, the greater the fissures and cracks that form in their marriage, giving Orlok more opportunity to come in and use it against them. Which is quite literally what he does. Thomas staying home, refusing the job, etc., only changes the how and when.
Ellen doesn't quite get it because based on what we know of her background and her father, she's never struggled to make ends meet, she's struggled with wealth and status being used against her. Of course she comes at this from the angle of 'being in a wealthy household didn't protect me', which Thomas can't understand. Neither can Ellen understand Thomas' perspective of being in debt to someone, worrying about failing to provide. I don't think it's simply that Thomas wants to make Ellen comfortable and have a life like she used to - he quite literally is worried that he cannot provide for her at all, especially if she gets sick (mentally or physically).
Like, Thomas in the 2024 movie isn't solely and completely driven by financial success - if you contrast him in the film with how Eggers originally wrote him in the 2016 script or how he's portrayed in the 2023 remake, this Thomas comes across to be more of the mindset that 'having financial success and being of similar standing to Ellen and Friedrich will make everything fine and I will be good enough to deserve her love and his friendship.' The driving factors are really that Thomas a) wants everything to be will for him and Ellen and b) wants to live up to the rigid societal standards of his gender. He's insecure, and he's overcompensating. Which isn't great but is a relatively normal character flaw, and certainly isn't one that is so inherently damning. His love and concern for Ellen still factor into things. He's not turning into a money-obsessed, toxic masculinity-minded asshole or something of the sort. That's why as soon as he's no longer naive to this darkness in the world - the things that Ellen has known of all along - his motivation shifts entirely to protecting Ellen. He understands now that unfortunately, in this rigged, supernatural game they're all trapped in, money means nothing. Money can't save Harding and his family, it certainly won't save Thomas and Ellen. But even IF he had known that all along - it wouldn't have made a difference.
Thomas and Ellen still need to live, Thomas would have to leave for work, and would have to take that job that sends him over to Transylvania. And if somehow they could circumvent that? Orlok still would find a way to separate them. Orlok would still come to Wisburg. Thomas is not the hero in this story, he's the damsel in distress, and unfortunately for him, while he gets to make it out alive, the actual hero who saves the day does not. Thomas loses his wife, but that is not his fault. It's not his fault he got assaulted, traumatized, left for dead, and it's not his fault he couldn't save Ellen. It's not his fault she died.
Ellen was doomed long before she met him, and that wasn't her fault, either.
anyway, all this to say - I'm glad I'm not on twitter. I'm glad I can block people with these takes.
#theirwolf replies#anonymous#anyway sorry anon if this seemed like I was going off on you I was not#I just needed to get some things off my chest#I was ranting with you not at you#considering the people I already have blocked I am more than likely just preaching to the choir but#guess I needed to preach#Thomas Hutter consistently fails at living up to the ideals of his gender and that is why he is precious#he also never takes this out on Ellen; yes he is dismissive early on but not unkindly#his comment about the doctors even indicates imo that he's saying this for her benefit as much as his#he is trying to help her avoid behaviors that could make things worse#it isn't his fault that mental health at the time sucked horrendously and was vastly misunderstood#and 2024 was a lot kinder and more nuanced - in the 2016 version Ellen actually DOES blame Thomas for things#(partially because Ellen herself never summoned Orlok somehow Orlok found out about her on his own)#this is something Eggers removed thankfully#idk like heaven forbid he want to keep a roof over their heads and food on the table and maybe make something of himself#it's like ladykatibeth said on the subject - very 'stay in your place' victim-blamey classism#which is just YIKES imo#it's one thing to not like him or think he was a bad husband or boring or whatever#it's the victim-blaming that makes me so angry#it's ignoring what is literally in the canon text#Ellen summoned him and Thomas went on that trip and neither of them are at fault for the CENTURIES OLD UNDEAD NOBLEMAN'S ACTIONS#Thomas Hutter#Nosferatu 2024
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tinkerbell oc tinkerbell oc tinkerbell oc tinkerbell oc tinkerbell oc tinkerbell oc---

(rambling about them below the cut ;;;)
he’s been rotting in the drafts for months bc im still not 100% about their design 😭
i’ve been back and forth between making them a 3rd yuu or just an oc but i finally settled with the latter
anyways some work-in-progress facts about them that may change:
his name is yuuyu laya (he/they) (he’s not yuu/mc but a 2nd year ramshackle student who transferred from diasomnia)
double yuu,,, “w”???
he’s also somewhat inspired by peter pan and wendy
doubleyu was fascinated by the infamous prefect who almost had the same name as them and wanted to keep up with their shenanigans and then just transferred to ramshackle in his second year
(yuu/mc “went home” after the first year and ramshackle’s current prefect/housewarden is grim <- lore i still need to figure out)
gets compared to the “original yuu” a lot
w is mute (he doesn’t choose to be, he literally has no voice) so he only makes whatever noises he can make with his body (whistling, finger snaps, tongue-clicking, etc.) or maybe he uses things like small bells to get other people’s attention (in relation to the fact that fairies sound like little bells to humans in the movies)
human raised by fae but sucks at magic (it was a miracle they got into diasomnia)
quite the macgyver, able to craft things seemingly out of anything but he’s insecure about it thinking it’s stupid that’s the only “good” thing he can do
spelldrive club bc flying??? (maybe loves the thrill and competition bc at least that’s something to be “worth” recognized for especially that he’s terrible at magic)
unique magic would be something like “faith, trust, and pixie dust” or something about the tinkerbell fairy movie lore about the baby’s first laugh giving birth to a fairy
also something something oc x canon with either floyd or silver
i'll get a feel for him first once i draw him more then I can finally settle on an intro post :0
#the tinkerbell movies were my childhood ;;;#despite the movies having conflicting lore 😭#at least during the first movies i think it got more consistent later on???#[—✦-#-✧ oc rambles#twst art#twst#twisted wonderland#twst oc#(💚) yuuyu laya#-✦—]#also what are the logistics of casting spells without a vocal component???#spells with the use of other bodily sounds???#stay tuned as i figure that out#twst i hate you so much for having so much oc-making opportunities#i have so many ideas#i was already so hesitant with yuuyu 😭#if i make all my ideas im never going to pay attention to them ever again hgjfdkjs#(✧) my art
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