#and everything is loud
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fuck, audhd burnout is a bitch.
#i can barely move my body without it feeling like a herculean task right now#my arms and fingers and legs feel like lead#my brain wants to do nothing but sleep for eternity#and everything is loud#so loud#i hate knowing i’m in burnout but not being able to do anything about it because im not diagnosed#i know exactly what i need but i cant get it its just out of my reach#and i wonder if i’m going to just self-destruct one day#if i’m going to be stuck in burnout for another three years on top of what feels like has already been a couple years in it#i feel like crying#not a hard cry#i dont even have energy for that#but the type where you sit there staring at nothing#sitting very still whilst tears just fall out of your eyes#i cant speak i dont want to speak i never want to go to school in person again i never want to open my mouth again#i never want to interact with another human being in person ever again apart from a very select few#im so sick of this#and sometimes i wish i could believe in god#any god would be alright#but i cant#thatd be lying to myself#cause i personally simply just do not believe that gods could exist outside of fantasy#but it leaves me with nothing to believe in#and thats tiring in itself#i want to stay on the bus#an empty bus#listening to music as it takes me who knows where#touring the city aimlessly#forever#i think that would fix me
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im going to kill someoen anx it might just be me if this doesnt resolve itself soon
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It was super effective
FIRST - PREVIOUS - NEXT
MASTERPOST (for the full series / FAQ / reference sheets)
#undertale#deltarune#utdr#comic#crossover comic#twin runes#twin runes au#twin runes comic#kris dreemurr#frisk#toriel#asgore#was about time that they burnt these things to the ground#toriel clearly has everything under control#let her handle the rest#I guess that would be thearpeutic to burn down your own wedding bouquet after a messy divorce#little behind the scenes info: so... the whole thing with kris and frisk blacking out during the fall#the original script called for them both NOT being caught by Toriel and Asgore#but they were actually supposed to land on the ground with a loud cracking sound and not move anymore#I DID draw that in the original sketch#but looking at it from an outside perspective was INCREDIBLY dark#I knew they were gonna be fine but it might've been extremely unsettling especially after that heroic scene from Frisk#considering this comic is like 13+ I didn't really know if this was appropriate or not#so I opted for some Toriel and Asgore character development instead#and yes that part of asgore's dialog about catching Kris when the fall from high places...#IS supposed to imply that Kris has fallen from many high places before#much to their parents' chagrin
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Just realized that Eddie's a silent crier because he was probably told boys don't cry and to keep it all inside and Buck's a loud crier because it's the only way he could get any kind of attention from his parents . Goodbye
#911#911 abc#911 show#evan buckley#eddie diaz#buddie#Like . Bucks also a loud crier because he feels So much and it just rushes out#And Eddie represses everything insideand the only time we've seen him verbally sob was when BUCK found him after his break down in his room
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HACKS | 3.04: Join the Club
#hacks#hacks hbo#hacksedit#ava x deborah#deborah vance#ava daniels#hacks spoilers#photoset#this week's laugh out loud moment for me#I hope someone else with more patience gifs everything in this scene tbh#it was art
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I choose to believe that the Doctor mentioning they've been to Pride means that at least at one point Six went to a pride because it would be the only place his jacket would be actually appreciated.
#I haven't watched 6 yet#but from everything I've seen#it appears his jacket isn't appreciated#which is a shame I think it's neat#loud#6th doctor#Doctor Who#rtd#rtd2#rtd2 era#ncuti gatwa#15th doctor#Doctor Who spoilers#dr who spoilers#dw s15 e06#dw s2 e6#dw spoilers#s15 e06#spoilers#The Interstellar Song Contest#sixth doctor#6th doctor's jacket#but neat
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It's actually hilarious how much fun I have drawing Scandalabra since playing his demo interactions. Like, seriously, look at this man -I fear he'd get my sona hook line and sinker with midnight gossip so say goodbye to her already nonexistant schedule.
Also a bonus for the aftermath of his second interaction bc HELLO???
#ghost art#date everything#date everything game#date everything scandalabra#scandalabra#date everything sona#self insert#i gotta decide what my sona's gonna go under for this one but i think i'll stick with Ghost for now#also unrelated but his nose is so pretty and fits his face so well and i like to think his wick flares with his emotions so#also his second interaction?#had me howling so loud i had to get up and walk away for a sec lmao#expect some more of these soon bc i roped my sis into playing it and she's gathering a suplex list as we speak#lemme know if there's anything else you'd like to see btw! Alsways open to doodle ideas <3
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Losing my fucking mind over this passage. you're telling me, after physically and emotionally torturing him, tricking him into building a doomsday device, emotionally manipulating him for YEARS, and ruining his relationship with his only remaining friend, this is what Ford counts as "crossing a line"? This is Fords breaking point? After everything? It's been over a decade since he's seen Stanley. He has no reason or intention to contact him. After all this time, he's still angry at him. And yet, Bill using his body, his voice, to tell Stanley that he hates him and never loved him is too much, too horrible even for Bill. THIS is what forces Ford to take action. AFTER EVERYTHING. Stanford Pines the man that you are. aa. aaaaaa
#i'll admit this does read a bit like 'you can't ruin my relationship with my brother. that's my job'#but ford is a hypocrite. we know this#despite inviting stan over to be his errand boy he doesn't want stan to get involved in his mess#he would never say it out loud but his brothers safety is still a priority of his. despite everything#under dozens of layers of anger and pride and upset he still cares for stanley so deeply. ahhhh#aigh#aogugughgh#gravity falls#stan twins#gf#stanford pines#the book of bill#stanford pines what is wrong with you (affectionate)#gf meta
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I'm doing so great, guys.
#spring aka my personal nightmare as someone with hyperacusis#winter is so calm and quiet and suddenly a switch pops off and everything is just so LOUD#'Time to open the windows!' *gets blasted by dozens of sounds at once* 'Time to close the windows!'#that's about the time when I start turning nocturnal#mello's drawings#mindless rambling#my art#neurodivergent#autism#hyperacusis
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part 2!!!! [read part one here]
transcript below the cut arranged into stanzas to help show where the rhymes are:
“that’s why they brought gem in? as a failsafe?” as a pawn. we were told to point her at whoever we need gone
“gem won’t hurt her allies. …yet.” the curse she carries will it’s had its eye on her since she lost the other eye she was specially selected for her hunting skill it’s quite the high honor. “wow. how generous.” we try
think about it: why does almost no one fight the curse? “given how fast scott killed skizz last season, i can guess.” [“any pain you spare your friends, you’ll have to suffer worse”?] it’s designed to shut down higher reasoning with stress
#if you still can't see the rhyme scheme try reading it out loud#if that doesn't work uh. idk. can't help you#my art#my poetry#grian#geminitay#smajor1995#bdoubleo100#inthelittlewood#secret life#grian and his terrible horrible no good very bad eldritch coworkers: the sequel#cant wait to post the next part so i can be like 'my three secret life comics. and yes they all rhyme'#this one narratively doesn't work nearly as well as a standalone compared to part 1#however i accidentally went way too hard and could probably upload the middle page + second to last panel as their own separate art pieces#tbh i'm considering putting an explanation of everything below the readmore buuut i don't feel like it atm. :3 later maybe#me and my 20+ life series headcanons i only allude to without explicitly stating don't need to explain ourselves#still experimenting with this webtoon-esque vertical comic style#still not sure i like it#it gets long too quickly#among other things#but it's very easy to read on a phone so
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go go demon gang
#also i love thinking art the dynamic between these three kjfnhkd#i think she hauling and binghe have the potential to be the most annoying and loud and bicker-y sibling pair to exist#and mobei jun has just grown accustomed to their shit so he stands mostly ignoring everything they say#but making sure they dont kill each other or accidentally die a gruesome death when theyre being competitive#they all like each other ok. they love each other ok. ok. ok.#scum villains self saving system#svsss#luo binghe#svsss fanart#sha hualing#mobei jun#人渣反派自救系统#mxtx
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love that katsuki calling himself “kacchan bakugo” wasn’t enough, he had to show off the scars he got for izuku too ughhh ︎

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i think possibly the chiefest point of horror in my first viewing of the terror, which still gets me every time, is Irving encountering the Netsilik family.
it’s a great, gutwrenching scene. Irving doesn’t intend any violence to them. he’s earnest, and they’re earnest in return—Koveyook feeds him, and you know it won’t save him, he’s asking too impossibly much of them when he mentions the rest of the crew, but it’s good in what it intends. on both sides, even.
and you know watching, from the outset, that somehow Irving is going to kill these people. somehow, in short order, this officer of the largest empire in world history is going to blow all their lives up. just by showing up, he’s condemned them to something; just by being aware of them, he’s taking from them. blast radius of imperialism.
and it’s so terrible, because they fed him and he gave them the only pretty and sentimental offering he had on him and ultimately, Irving won’t ever even know he got them killed, though they will have died thinking he meant to do it.
and even so: it doesn’t matter that he didn’t mean it. because they didn’t know him!! and they fed him! and they were murdered for it. take and take and take and take. fuck
#john irving#koveyook#the terror#scenes that make u say oh god please no out loud on first viewing#the horror of hope the horror of poisoning everything you touch the horror of being a minor footnote in another nations heroic epic#et cetera!!!!#q#jirv
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yeah i didn’t even have to hear his voice to know this is matt….
#out loud i said ‘MATT MERCER SCARY PENSIVE HANDS OMGOMG’#chance date everything#date everything#date everything game#matt mercer#matthew mercer
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this is what i did instead of studying for the past two days. magnificent innit
#ninjago kai#ninjago zane#oppositeshipping#teshfarts#animatic?? png slideshow...???#i have been plagued by the need for anything and everything oppo lately. be it written drawn or a daydream#ninjago the first thing im thinking RIGHT AFTER I FINISH MY EXAMS!! curses#< /silly it lifts my mood 🔥🔥#so currently i am reading a 44 chapter 137k words polyninja ranch summer job fic because hell yeah#tw loud#kinda?? the audio is super quiet but if you accidentally up your volume too high everyone might hear the big F#cw swearing#mae if you see this i annjsbkebdlabsbjbhrvfjfu (on s1 ep9 of arcane as of typing this)
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(Minors dni)
Hey. You. Yeah, you. The fuck are you doing wearing that shit? I told you, no more feminine crap. Fucking hell man, you look like a girl. Not like the man I know you are inside. Anyways, c'mon. We gotta fix this mess.
I'm dyeing all your stuff black and while I'm painting new patches for your jacket, I'm forcing you to sit on the ground with your head between my spread legs so you can get a good look at what you'll have one day. Hold still you fucking dog, good boys know how to wait. If you're that desperate to get off, you can use my boot like a mutt. Don't you dare make me mess up the stitching on these patches though, this shit's a pain in the ass to get right.
When I'm done, you'll finally look like what you're supposed to. Buzzed head, black denim, and a jacket with patches screaming all the things that you were too scared to even whisper when you were entertaining that stupid idea about being a girl. Chains hanging from your belt, and steel-toed leather boots good enough for crushing the assholes who get in your way.
I'm taking you to a concert in some cramped grimy basement later. It'll be loud, but your voice cracking from the T I'm putting you on will be louder.
#this is purely self indulgent because i'm a punk and wanted to see forcemasc about that#punk is really gender affirming to me tbh#it lets me be loud and crass and take up space and be everything i wasn't allowed within the constraints of femininity placed upon me#autoandrophilia#forced masculinization#forcemasc#ftm nsft#trans nsft#ftm hypno#Diesel is making forcemasc posts
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