#and im like ok but dude i have a bunch of stuff to do for school and work and i dont have time to cook this from scratch and then do dishes

[cyancherub]

rly not a fan of ppl imposing their idea of fun on me under the assumption that it's also my idea of fun

[cryinggirlnamedhelen]

“𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐦𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐨” — 𝐟𝐭; 𝐠𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐭𝐚

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 ; the little things you do that he would never—ever—allow anyone to do. at least, anyone but you.

𝐟𝐭 ; enjin, zanka nijiku, zodyl typhon

𝐜𝐰 ; gn!reader, established relationship, swearing, pet names (love, darling), reader is a cleaner in enjin and zanka’s, reader and enjin are married, reader and zodyl are married, fluff

𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 ; those eyes by new west

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 ; thank you to @dollywons for the wonderful dividers! and also first time writing for gachiakuta yessss! these three + amo and rudo are my favs btw. @kumasakka @riuvy @megumismyhusband im gonna steal your mans ok

𝐄𝐍𝐉𝐈𝐍

"what is happening right now," rudo muttered, crimson eyes wide as he watches enjin scramble aaround hq. you're pointing at different directions, talking about which chore's needed to be completing and ordering enjin to finish them. enjin's working at lightning speed, and rudo slowly walked over to you.

"there's more laundry that way! oh, and there are some leftover dishes in the mess hall. and--oh, good morning rudo." you paused. rudo glanced at you, blinking a few times.

"what are...you doing?" he asked quietly, voice still choppy from just having woken up.

"there are a bunch of unfinished chores around here, and everyone else at hq is busy. so of course i'm getting his lazy ass to do them." you pointed at another room and told enjin another command.

rudo rubbed his eyes. but doesn't enjin hate getting bossed around? and looking at the look on enjin's face, he definitely wasn't enjoying this, but you surely were. rudo looked at you in horror. "did you cast a spell on him or something...?" he asked. you shook your head.

"no, he kind of just does it when i ask him to. funny, right? it's pretty convenient." you hummed. the moment you stopped pointing towards different directions, enjin came running back.

"that's all, right? right?" enjin asked. you nodded, and he let out a sigh of relief. "good. if i had to do another chore, i would have--" you gave him a look, and he froze.

"you would have what? care to elaborate?" you asked. he shook his head.

"i--uh--would have done it again, of course, love." enjin said, clearing his throat. "you need any help carrying stuff or anything?" he asked, following you as you walked away. he leaned against you, lips brushing against your cheek and ear.

"nah. thanks for offering though." rudo rubbed his eyes again. was this really happening? is this actually real? enjin doesn't even take orders from semiu. in fact, rudo's surprised enjin hasn't ran off at this point and disappeared and came back with divorce papers, the matching rings on your finger soon to be gone. but instead, enjin's following you around like a lost puppy.

rudo shook his head. love is scary.

𝐙𝐀𝐍𝐊𝐀 𝐍𝐈𝐉𝐈𝐊𝐔

riyo yawned as she entered the mess hall, only a few people sitting there. it was early in the morning, so it made sense that there wouldn't be many people here. she found her seat next to you, hair messy. "g'morning--wait."

"good morning riyo. what's wrong?" you asked. she stared down at your lap, a woden 'y' shaped stick across it, your hands holding a towel. a bottle of polish sat next to you on the bench. her eyes widened.

"dude, zanka's gonna kill you if he sees you with his assisstaff!" she exclaimed. gripping your shoulder. "you should put it back in his room or wherever he found it in the exact position, otherwise you're cooked." she rambled. you blinked.

"why?" you asked. riyo stared at you as if someone asked her why 1+1 is equal to 2. "i'm helping him with his assisstaff. it's not like i'm harming it or anything."

"the fact that you touched it in the first place already guarantees you a long ass apology. and the fact that you're taking it and taking care of it without his permission is even--" riyo froze as she stared behind you, zanka walking in.

"hm? what's goin' on?" he asked, rubbing his eyes. "oh, g'mornin' riyo. mornin' love." he mumbled, slumping next to you and laying his head on your shoulder.

riyo stared a few times, from you to the staff to zanka, before a devilish grin stretched across her face. "ohhhhh, zanka is a simp."

zanka glanced up at riyo and shrugged, before he glanced at his staff and a soft smile made way onto his face. "thanks, darlin'. you're always takin' care of her." he muttered, kissing your forehead.

you nodded. "of course." he gripped your hand, your body smelling faintly of the citrusy wood polish. riyo whistled before leaving, lacking the desire to third whell so early in the morning.

𝐙𝐎𝐃𝐘𝐋 𝐓𝐘𝐏𝐇𝐎𝐍

"no, and listen to this! they were cousins too! cou-sins!" you exclaimed, tugging on zodyl's arm. "i mean, that's so stupid! this whole time you've been so mad at her over your fuckass cousin?" he nodded, continuing to listen to your ramblings.

"mhm," he mumbled much more immersed in your expressions and voice than your actual words. the other raiders just stared; the meeting was supposed to have started 10 minutes ago, but the moment you started yapping about your friend and her "opp" (god knows what that means), zodyl's just been full listening mode to you.

"whatta simp," jabber noted. "this is boring, but at least his wife's a cool person to fight with..." cthoni shrugged, and momoa was just blasting music in her headphones, waiting for this to end.

the meeting is important, and the mission is crucial. but your yapping comes first. "right?! and i was so confused like what the literal fuck is going on? like ain't no way you're jealous of another girl because she has a crush on your cousin! and--"

someone rolled their eyes. an extremely unlucky someone. because the moment their eyes rolled, zodyl sent them a nasty glare, dark aura forming around him. you didn't seem to notice yet, but they gulped. the members of the front line--specifically jabber--whistled. the calm and collected zodyl would usually never do this.

"okay, and that's that. anyways, what were we here to discuss again?" you asked, glancing around the room. you weren't talking to anyone but zodyl, and yet you had just yapped half of everyone's ear off.

"the information broker," zodyl replied. "the person we need momoa to steal information from." you blinked a few times, refreshing your memory.

"oooooooh, hiiiiim! oh my gosh, so did i tell you that this one person i know told me that the information broker is actually..." aaaand here comes another yap session. again. a few people let out silent sighs--death sentences--, this meeting was never going to even begin.

[kilometresrufflefuck]

sparknotes about my recent "fanfiction", for once warranted, because this one really needs an explanation

hey kids, i just posted fic which is literally just a fake court judgment. who the fuck wants to read nearly three thousand words of dumb ass fake judgespeak? well, i wrote it, and it's loosely based on a real case, so let's talk about it.

let's cover some shit off real quick

the judge's legal name is judge. he is referred to as justice judge. i think his given name, also judge.

carla pritt = culprit. falcon kai = fall guy.

this takes place somewhere in the 3d game era.

what is the real case

so, i'm not going to link to it because it is real crime and contains potentially upsetting content. (i'm also not talking about the facts of the crime itself, only the grounds for appeal.) suffice it to say it's an australian case which dealt with the issue of "is it fine if your lawyer is boning the prosecution".

a disclaimer: im australian. im pretty sure this is different in the US and i have no idea about any other jurisdiction. i think in the US the answer is closer to "no, dude?"

a second disclaimer: none of anything i have said or am about to say should be taken as reliable information about the law, in any jurisdiction, or circumstance, ever, forever. this is pure entertainment, it's nonsense, and even the stuff im presenting as information could be wrong because im pretty dumb, very tired, did not do my due diligence on this because it's fanfiction not my job, and also have a lot of gin in me at time of writing this.

stop making disclaimers and tell us about the case

ok

a person was convicted of doing a crime. they then found out the prosecutor and their lawyer had been in, like, a de facto relationship for a bunch of time before the trial, then they broke up. while the trial was ongoing, they were broken up and not together. previously, when they'd run trials while they were a couple, they'd disclosed their relationship to all relevant parties. however, since they were NOT a couple at the time, they didn't disclose anything to the defendant in this case.

the main problem is that during that trial period, and while they were broken up, the prosecutor and defence shared a hotel room. both swore up and down that "nothing happened". the main problem with THAT is that after the trial ENDED, they got BACK TOGETHER. the judgment was like, "respectfully, even if you didn't actively fuck in that hotel room, the fact that you guys WERE together and then got BACK together kind of implies that you were into each other while you were doing the hotel room thing, which is kind of different from other lawyers who have never fucked, even if you were not actively fucking at the time." < paraphrased

anyway the defendant was like "what the fuck dude" and appealed on the basis that if their lawyer had just told them he was boning the prosecution then they maybe could've gotten over it but he didn't so they couldn't.

the outcome

the fucking in and of itself wasn't the issue, whether or not it's a problem depends on the conduct of the lawyers. the judges in this case basically agree that there was no actual miscarriage of justice and that the lawyers did a professional job despite the alleged fucking; however there was arguably a perceived miscarriage of justice and concerns about whether the defendant had a fair trial in that light, so they went for the retrial. the lord hewart quote in the fic is real and is cited in this case although i think they got his name wrong.

rook why did you write this

read that story and tell me that isn't the most narumitsu thing that's ever happened.

can you translate any of the legalese in this fic

i actually tried not to put legalese in this fic but god, i can't always spot it anymore. i DID make it deliberately kind of shittily written with lots of long pretentious sentences out of faithfulness to all the judgments i have ever had to read. so yes i wrote like 2k+ of something that's hard to read on purpose, although im still hoping it's like, theoretically more readable than the billion pages of bullshit i had to slog through at school. anyway tell me if you want me to translate something and i'll do it for you.

ok but rook WHY. did you write this.

ive been sick all week and didn't want to be useful at work. i decided the way to cope with that would be to write an unreadable lump of pseudo legal nonsense, on my phone, at my desk, in increments of several minutes between tasks, for my own amusement only?

what is this work

i studied law for many years and was professionally admitted as a legal practitioner so that i could pursue a career of learning just enough about law to write extremely stupid ace attorney fanfiction

[copepods]

🌇 factored-antagonism 🔁 three-pronged-spears Follow

🌫️ three-pronged-spears Follow

DNI if you support Peripherism. It's literally just Slab Mongering but worse and with less effort

#wait peripherism is still a thing?????? #meaning collector point inversions havent been the norm in like 350 years afaik

36 notes

💟 pleading-intellect

GUYSSSS my overseer found a clutch of baby green lizards today they're so CUTE

#inty.txt #and BEFORE anyone accuses me of not iterating im literally running 55,458 processes rn

2 notes

❇️ string-of-pearls 🔁 rippling-shadows Follow

👤 forspoken-antiquity Follow

hey FYI everyone if you receive an ask about transcendental inversions it's a troll. i've gotten 3 asks in the last cycle

#signal boost!!

2,347 notes

🌁 nineteen-afterthoughts

"ohhh Triangulation is outdated" "ohhh Triangulators dont even factor noise milking into their research theyre a bunch of idiots" im literallu just a little guy im 4 feet tall why do you hate me

⬜️🔁 erratic-pulse

Irrelevant tangents and jokes don't help your case. Triangulationism is simply an objectively moronic take on an already superfluous train of thought. How are you supposed to find the Solution if you can't even properly look for it?

🌁🔁 nineteen-afterthoughts

you literally have Sliverist in your bio but go off

⬜️🔁 erratic-pulse

The minutiae of my theoretical inclinations are irrelevant. Your dogma is blatantly incorrect regardless.

🌁🔁 nineteen-afterthoughts

your group senior and i are raising a family together

19 notes

💽 slowly-advancing-mist

a band of scavengers literally just stole my last vat of holy ash thats it im seeking personal ascension

#vent #dont rb

0 notes

🚹 untoward-foresight Follow

Anyone else gotten really into Gold Hegemonic epic poetry recently? This one dude Eight Brass Whistles has a bunch of crazy quasi-Regeneratist stuff, it's actually really cool

🎹 east-facing-pillars

wasnt Eight Brass Whistles a heretic???? i heard he refused to shed the 3rd attachment or something like that

🚹 untoward-foresight Follow

Nah that callout post got debunked 533 cycles ago lol

🎹 east-facing-pillars

ahhh ok thanks for clarifying! ill let you know if i find anything :)

#thanks for being polite haha #lesson learned i gotta check this forum more LMAO

93 notes

⬜️ erratic-pulse

anonymous asked:

Transcendental Inversion! Transcendental Inversion!

Only someone with a fundamentally false understanding of inversion modes would send this. You can't even do such a thing without sufficient trailing bonds, which entropy renders impossible.

#Why do I always encounter idiots on this pseudonym?

5 notes

[gassydumbjocks]

Its Good To Be A Man

Tyler close the door and throw himself to the sofa, exhausted after a day of work thanking it was finally over. He worked at a pretty good company, but being the only gay guy in his department and having to deal with homophobes and sexist co-workers was sometimes too much for him, so he thought about watching a movie or a tv show maybe to relax and sleep.

He started to look up in his VHS Cassettes' box and soon noticed that strangely, a new one was there, it didn't got any cover or stuff, and just had written "Its good to be a man" as the only title on it, he found it weird, but then supposed perhaps that his dumb jock of a roommie got it and put it with his stuff "I've told him not to touch my things like a million times, when is that brute gotta learn"

He had to admit the curiousity was hitting him, it was probably a home made video recorded by Connor and his gross buddies, but boy... after all, he was gay, and all of Connor's friends were toned ripped jocks from the gym (with a brain of a peanut size, but hot after all)

Thinking "maybe its just their excersizes routines... guess it wouldn't hurt to see" feeling a bit of a lust mood running in his body "ok, just a couple minutes...but i swear, if its just them having a belch off, im burning this" he said.

Putting the tape in the tv player, he clicked to put the video, and all of a sudden, the typical static sound shows, then a simple white screen, making Tyler raise an eyebrow, before what seemed to be a variety show intro plays, a smiling man in a suit which he supposed was the host, along a bunch athletic shirtless men with dumb expressions who followed next to him appeared in screen.

"Good to see ya again my brothers!" The host announces "this is your program where you learn how to be real MEN", as if it was a cue, the stud-bodied-like guys all grunted and beated their chests, like they were gorillas making a chanting "Uh!, Uh!, Uh!" and flexed their arms, making the audience laugh loudly, with those cocky grins Tyler knew so well, he rolled his eyes.

Making the host laugh aswell, he patted one of them in the back "That's what i talk about" he joked "Alright folks, tonight we'll indulge into an intense session of what it means to be a man, these guys here will serve as examples in showing you all stuff boys MUST do to become the alpha macho men they truly are" he adds, then, smirking, he takes a small device from his suit pocket.

"This little thing here made sure to leave them empty headed and obey any manly command given to them, just as it'll make sure to do the same for you, ma boy" he suddenly announces.

"...The hell?" Tyler said, arching his look again as he watched them "is this some bullshit hypnosis crap or?..." he asked

"That's right, dudes! Lets begin" the host shouted. "It's time to show off around what you're made of! We'll do something primal, no pun intented" he joked "We'll now do the first category: BURPING!, so, let's hear those nice bassy burps!" he says, turning to the group of jocks, as he pressed a button of that device.

Immediatly, they started to release loud and deep monsters of burps, at unison, as if they were in trance, still with those dumb expressions, and Tyler could swear he saw how one of them got his eyes crossed with a complete fool face.

Even worse, Tyler felt a strange urge to burp himself too. He tried to resist, but the feeling was overwhelming, he rubbed his gut hoping to calm it down, but he just letted out a loud, embarrassing belch, blushing immediatly

"Wha-BOOOOUUURRP?- Is happening?!" he said between belches, a little ashamed.

"Excellent!" the host cheered. "This is what i call a manly symphony!, but we also know there is another way to do that, right?" He asks the public with a mischevous grin "FARTING is a big part in the bonding among men, so, we just have to, let it rip right?" He asked again, as he pressed that little button.

Some of the guys turned around to show their butts, other simply proceed to lift their legs, but they all did the same, at the command of "letting rip" they instantly started a worthy orchestra of simultaneous farts, each sounding grosser and deepest than the last one

Tyler was grossed out and sick, he wanted it to stop, but as he bend over a bit over to approach the tv, his butt felt the need to drop a massive, and nasty monster of a deep fart, the loudest he've ever letted out, he could feel his butt vibrating at that one, sitting normally again, horrified and trying to cover his butt with his hands.

"This-BOOOOOOOUUUUURRRRRPP!" He belched "Is a nightmare!..."

PPPPPPPPPPPPRRRRRTTTT!!!

That last fart seemed to do something on Tyler, he kept one second silent before, turning his head to the tv again, now with a dumb and foolish grin adorning his face "hahaha, dudee, i need to quit the bean dip next timee" he said in a lower, more manly voice.

"Whew! Guys! Ok ok its enough! Hahaha" The always happy host said, as he waved his hand to make the smell go away, as the dumb bunch of men kept blasting bombs out of their butts "Geez, dont anybody here think on turning on a lighter" he said bursting in laughing, making Tyler laugh too at the stupid joke.

"But for now, this is all we got for today's emmision, bros, we're glad that you could come with us in this, stinky, foul and manly lessons that every man needs to apply in his everyday, till the next program! Boys? Would you like to wave goodbay?" he asked with a grin.

The camera showed each of them, now it was sure they all had that same cross-eyed look and dumb smiles, like Tyler did, the staff offered a can of a kind of soda to one of them, which he drank in a single gulp, before removing it from his lips "GOOOD BYEEEEAAAAUUURRRRRP!" A massive belch came out, as he succesfully burp-talked, gaining again the laughs and applause from all the people in the set.

Meanwhile with Tyler, at the same time he also relaxed his muscles, and lifted a leg as he felt some pressure in his lower abdomen, he knew very well what that meant "Bombs away!" he said proudly, before the smelly, big and long fart made its way out of his crack.

PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTT!!!

"Hahah!" he chuckled "i think i just ruined my undies"

[another-sister-of-sin]

Volunteer!Reader x Ghost (The Band) Pt. 3

Pt. 2

Summary: you tell your roommate that you met satanists and uhhhh the brothers are being brothers. found family with the guys :)

no warnings, its just kinda short

WC: 1,329

The bus ride feels faster on the way back. Maybe it’s just because you’re no longer anxious, but it’s still a nice journey. They’re certainly a bit of a weird bunch, but much more welcoming than you would think. It feels like there’s something much bigger going on behind the scenes, but hey like the wizard says, don’t look behind the curtain. It’s not like you’ll get that much information as an intern anyways, so you decide not to worry too much about it.

Walking back into your dorm, it seems like Maya had been through here. Probably to get some of her things if she’s staying over at Vivian’s for the whole weekend. You walk over to your desk to see a note left on one of your textbooks. “Hey!! Sorry I missed you!! Came by to grab some stuff, see you Monday <3”

Oh shit, you realize you didn’t tell her about the Satanist internship. You probably should’ve told someone you were gonna meet actual Satanists out in the middle of the woods. It ended up being ok, but not the smartest decision.

You plug in your phone to charge at your desk before texting Maya. writing out a whole lotta words in one message so she can’t interrupt you with her questions in all caps.

> hey uhh so i should’ve told you last night, but after my advising appointment i got told i needed some volunteer hours or whatever. so i applied to some satanic church and got asked to have an ‘interview’ (if you could call it that) and went to meet them in the middle of a forest”

You hold your breath as you send it to her. Since coming here, she’s basically been your roommate since freshman year, and you’ve grown fairly close. It was a little difficult to make friends in college, even though the theatre community was really nice to you when you first joined. But you never really clicked with them. It wasn’t like the theatre you knew back home, they felt more conceited here, as rude as it might be to say.

Maya responds almost immediately, replying in all caps like you thought she would.

> IM SORRY EHTA

> THE FUCK

> WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU WENT TO TH E MIDDLE OF NOWHERE TO MEET SATANISTS

> LIKE ACTUAL SATANISTS

> IM SURE THEYRE LOVELY PEOPLE BUT JESUS C HRIST DUDE

Message after message came through, telling you how reckless you had been to just hop on a bus without telling people. You smile, it was nice to know someone worried this much, even if she was technically yelling at you.

You give her a few more minutes to get it out of her system, with some messages from VIvian too when Maya got a little too heated to type out her thoughts. Speaking of which, you get one more text after it calms down.

> Hey, Vivian again. She’s taking a bit of a breather rn. Sorry about ‘yelling’ at you. How’d it go?

> It went fine, kinda weird people but i didn’t feel uncomfortable or anything. They were really nice actually. The ‘head’ of the organization or whatever said she’d give me a few days to decide.

> Wait, decide? I thought this was an interview for you? To hire you?

> yeah uhhh apparently not. Theyre offering experience, even for an intern position. They said its a new position theyre trying out so it would be a bit of a learning experience for all of us

>  Well I trust your instincts, sounds like a pretty good deal. I’ll explain it to Maya right now so you don’t have to deal with her ‘yelling’ at you anymore.

> thanks

Well.. that went ok. At least Vivian’s cool with it. She was always more level headed between the two, which is why it probably works out as well as it does. Or maybe she should be just as worried given the situation… Either way it worked out for you.

Maybe you have weirder friends than you originally thought…

You set your phone down and lean back into your chair, taking in a deep breath. Vivian’s right, it does sound like a good deal, even if it’s a bit strange. You decide to give it one more day before emailing Sister Imperator your answer.

For now, you stretch your arms above your head and try to motivate yourself to do some homework so you don’t have to worry about it later. Maybe get some food first, you didn’t actually get to eat earlier after sleeping in and then rushing to the Ministry. Yeah, probably focus on that first.

Back at the Ministry, the Emeritus brothers lounge around their personal living area. Because they’re part of “The Family ™”, they get their own private part of the building that no one else is allowed in, unless they’re personally invited.

Secondo sits in a large ornate chair near the fireplace, nursing a large glass of wine. Close by, Copia and Primo play some card game with Terzo heckling them in the background. After almost exposing the existence of the ghouls to the applicant, Terzo got an earful from both Primo and Sister Imperator. But that didn’t seem to put a damper on his mood after, especially now as he was at booing Copia. Copia raised his hand to throw his cards at Terzo, but before Copia could retaliate, Sister Imperator walked in, gaining the attention of the whole room.

“Well, that could’ve taken a turn, but I have a good feeling about them. What do you all think?” Sister Imperator asks the room. It takes a few seconds until someone responds, unsurprisingly it’s Terzo who speaks up first.

“They seem great, and they weren’t afraid to point out Secondo’s name right out of the gate! I expect them to liven up the place if they decide to stick around.” Sister Imperator gives him a sharp look, “Yes well, let’s hope your little slip up didn’t affect anything.”

Terzo winces at her harsh tone, slinking behind Primo to escape her gaze. While Sister’s eyes are on Primo, he takes the chance to speak, mercifully taking her attention away from Terzo. “They seem nice, if not slightly timid. It’s not everyday someone gets to meet us all at once, in our full outfits nonetheless. But it seemed like they handled it well enough without a warning.”

She nods in agreement, now moving on to Copia. He shrugs his shoulders. “Well… they certainly don’t seem scared of us. We never really leave the best first visual impression ehh… no one told me about wearing our Papa gear today though.” Copia trails off, almost pouting at the idea of being left out today. But maybe it was for the best, who would be willing to walk into the building with a guy in full skull makeup and glittery robes.

Secondo huffs in amusement from his chair, taking a sip of his wine. “Do you have something to say? Secondo?” Sister Imperator asks him, raising an eyebrow at him. He hums for a moment before responding. “They will fit in. if they choose to take the position.” And that’s all he says. Sister waits to see if he says anything else, but nothing comes out.

She nods, looking around the room one last time, then turns to leave. Copia sighs once she’s out of the room, looking down at his cards. “Do you think they’ll take the position?” he murmurs, almost to himself. Primo and Terzo think it over, but Secondo is the first to respond. “They will.” A simple sentence of two words. “Ohhh,” Terzo scoffs, “You seem so sure, whatever could you mean by that dear prophetic brother of ours?”

Secondo shakes his head with a small smirk, “Just a hunch.” While Secondo was more clairvoyant than his brothers, he never really worked towards honing it in. But they knew whenever he had a ‘hunch’ about things, they should trust it.

Next>>

[wolfdownpussy]

Its so funny how a lot of modern fantasy fandom has become hyper critical of so many tropes to the point that im pretty sure if "The Lord of the Rings" and the Middle Earth lore was published today it would be beaten to the ground, especially by the people who get obsessed by lotr like its a religion above all fantasy

"Oh so there is this bad guy who used to be this super pretty elf but now he is this super mega scary dark lord and also he is both a vampire and a werewolf and he is older than some laws of physics? woaw ok sure wattpad writer "

"ok so you took the dark elves/dwarfs (what? dwarves? ok sure make your own words...) of germanic myths, you took away their magical powers of shapeshifting and a bunch of their iconic traits, and instead of making them antagonists you sometimes bargain with, you made them good guys, less tempted by power than humans and they serve a message of tolerance even of what we see as monsters? ok sure the monsters are actually good guys we get it you're super open minded..."

"ok so these goblins... you also call them.. what.. orcs? oh like orcus but without the 'us' ok, sure, again why cant you just call it what it is, also isnt that also a word/root for ogres? so they are big and strong? no they're still small and sneaky? ok sure call whatever whatever"

"ok so these ents, its originally a giant of english folklore? like a normal giant? and you made them what? big walking talking trees? what the hell?! why cal them ents then?! cause its a jokey reference to Shakespear? dude do you take it seriously? its not even based on any myth you're just making stuff up!"

"ok so these elfs (what... elves? again with your bullshit?! ok sure...) so they are a mix of alfr, aos sidhe, vanir, fairies, genies, and angels, and their language is like some weird altered finnish? what the hell are they even supposed to be?! and they look like super cool humans and thats it? oh they have pointy ears like paintings of fairies, sure ok super original... and whats they deal? they are good archer as a reference to the saying "elf-shoot" ok sure thats basically a pun super serious, ok so they are like super awesomes little favorites of the gods... and they have to learn to respect mortals as equals..? you know fantasy racism metaphors never work right?!"

"hey i just checked some of your names, you say you made up some languages but a bunch of your characters just have anglicised names of norse mythology characters!"

"what? Gandalf? you just took the name of a norse mythology dwarf/dark elf and took away the r at the end? and it means the elf with a staff? so uh its a dwarf or an elf? he's a human looking god wizard?!?!"

"ok so the heroes are... just some lil guys inspired by contryside england? ok super boring, also self insert much?!"

[the-broken-heart-archives]

The Red String Theory

Jason Todd x reader soulmate AU

Summary: Everyone gets a red string leading to there soulmate but it doesn't show up until you see each other for the first time

CW : mention of people being used as a bonfire, originally written for fem reader but can be read as gn (still going to tag fem reader just in case)

Enjoy🫶

(Reader)s pov :

You had given up all hope of ever finding your soulmate so it came as quite a shock to you when your red string appeared and started pulling you towards the fucking RED HOOD while you were in a hostage situation

But you couldn't just sit there and stare no you had to do something cool like...finger guns?...no that's not cool at all

"Sup" you said weakly

...

OH MY GODS WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU REALLY SUP (READER) your mind screamed at you

~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°🧡°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~

Jason's pov :

He was freaking out

But also he wanted to laugh

Especially after you said sup

You looked absolutely horrified and it was just to cute

Oh god stop it Jason

you can't do this

You have stuff to do get it done then worry about them

~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°🧡°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~

(Reader)s pov :

Well at least he doesn't seem to acknowledge your sup that's good

you completely forgot that you were in a cage with a bunch of panicking people and villain of the week making a dramatic speech because all you could think about was how he looks under the mask

But you got snapped back to reality when the villain of the week said "and then im going to use these people as a bonfire"

What the fuck is wrong with this dude you don't just say that unless you are severely messed up in the head and you should know you work with extremely messed up people on the daily being a detective in Gotham and all

Honestly your surprised that you haven't met the red hood yet given he works with batman and sometimes you help the bats with cases

I mean you've met most of them

You think

THERES ALOT OF THEM OK SORRY IF I CANT REMEMBER THEM ALL

~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°🧡°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~

Jasons pov :

Get it together the others are watching

*Time skip bc I can't write fight scenes*

*Back at the cave*

"Why'd you freeze out there little wing" Dick said

Alright Keep it cool Jason

calm down

CALM DOWN

"I don't know what you talking about" Jason looked down at what he was doing seeing the red string attached to his ring finger it's warm and fuzzy where it touches his skin it makes him want more...

NO

Stop thinking like that why would they want the fucking red hood anyway let alone Jason Todd

As soon as he's done he can leave

...

And maybe think about how pretty you looked

WHAT NO!

WHAT WAS THAT JASON STOP

You don't even know there fucking name

I bet it's as stunning as them his mind rang

What the actual fuck was happening to him

~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°🧡°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~

(Reader)s pov :

You layed in your bed face down you couldn't sleep

It was starting to piss you of how much the red string was trying to get you to go to him

IN GOTHAM IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT MIND YOU

But you love the fuzzy and warm feeling you got from the Sting on your finger

When you touch it you can't feel it you just get pulses of fuzz all over your body

It's AMAZING

And before you knew it you fell asleep to the warmth radiating of the string

~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°🧡°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~•~°~

PT2

Going to remake this probably

DO NOT post my works to another platform, translate it, put it though ai or anything like that thank you

With love Ry🫶

[7arami]

Totally Bats! Pt 0.1

im rewatching Totally Spies, the first 6 seasons ill decide if i wanna watch the new 7th season once im done, so i can start planning out some more totally spies x batfam crossover ideas

and like before i started binge watching i thought about how the girls would feel about killing, and in my head i was convinced that bcs they are young girls working for a secret international human protection organization. that the show would have this heavy emphasis on these girls still trying to save the villians even though theyre bad, espicially cuz the show is made for kids. and many times it does just that, but at the same time there have multiple occurences where the girls actually jus give no fucks. throwing people out of airplanes and saying some cheesy quip like "enjoy the flight" or "happu landings" or some shit.

like season 3 episode 12 is about britney being stranded on a WOOHP island that is holding prisoners and the girls' mission is to go and save her off the island, but they gotta be careful bcs britney's crash took out the security and so the prisoners r running loose. and jerry warns them that theyve got like a bit over 3 hours to save her. and u wanna kno y that is. ITS BCS THE ISLAND IS RIGGED TO FUCKING EXPLODE DUE TO ALL THE PRISONERS BEING RELEASED. JERRY SAID: FUCK DEALING WITH THAT SHIT IM JUS GONNA KILL ALL THESE MOTHERFUCKERS, EASIER THAN TRYING TO ROUND THEM ALL UP AGAIN. not all the prisoners were human like there was mutated monster thing in like robot armor and an alien predator like creature, but there was still plenty of people. tho they did bring some of them with them when they escaped. but sam, alex, and clover did literally say that they didnt care about saving anyone besides britney, so i am still convinced that if they had jus found britney, they wouldve jus left with her and not cared about saving the other people on the island lol

like im sorry, but that is fucking hilarious. and im def gonna keep this in mind when i start writing my ts x dc au lol

i mine like literally, imagine the batfam fighting along side the girls and they witness an instance like this

Nightwing and the girls fighting goons on top of a building: Alex: *punches some guy who then stumbles off the building and doesn't make any move to catch them* bye bye :) Dick: *scrambling off the building to catch the dude before they go splat* Alex: ??? *turns to Sam* What's all that about? Sam: *shrugs* I dunno . . . Dick: *pulling himself and the goon back on top of the building, slightly out of breath and nor glaring at Alex* What was that?! You would've killed him! Alex: Ok . . . and? Dick: *now looking at all of the girls, whom look like they could give less of a fuck about their friend literally tossing someone off a roof* Do you just do stuff like this all the time? Clover: *not even looking up as she checks her nails* Look, we're here to save the world, not babysit a bunch of grown men, who, might I add, attacked us first. Dick: *growing even more irritated* That doesn't mean you can just kill them! Sam: *roles her eyes* Whatever, not like they'd be rushing to catch us if we were to be thrown off the side of a building. Alex: *just took care of the last few goons in the background as the three were talking* Are we seriously still talking about this? You saved the guy can't we just move on? The season finale of the showing I'm watching is gonna air soon! Dick: *worried about how often instance like this have happened, and why these girls are so nonchalant about it* . . . wtf

[radiation]

Ok here are my brief thoughts on Mouthwashing. SPOILERS WARNING And mostly negative sorry. Lots of things i liked but i think most ppl have said that stuff already so i wont repeat it

Loved the art direction, really loved the dialogue, I enjoyed the game a lot in the first half. Unfortunately towards the halfway point where it began leaning further into the horror game shit it really started losing me. The gameplay segments where you get chased around by something or other were seriously just horrendously, horrendously badly designed and a lot of the puzzles felt repetitive or inscrutable (Altho keep in mind I'm terrible at solving puzzles/finding shit in video games. When people talk about "yellow paint" I'm 100% who that shit is for)

It wasnt just the gameplay though, I also just wasn't a huge fan of the metaphorical / scary visuals / out-of-body experience stuff. I felt it slowed down the pace of events and put a barrier between me and the reality of the story being told. It rarely communicated new plot points and ideas and mostly restated information I'd already received verbally in an abstract way. Yes they were visually stunning, very technically impressive, and a few felt genuinely novel and well-placed (the reveal of the mouthwash ad on the TV fucking ruled), but I feel like for the most part those moments were almost obligatorily following modern indie horror game trends. I understand the point of that kind of stuff and it definitely can be effective, but idk i see it so much Im just personally very tired of it unless it really justifies its own existence, and in this case i unfortunately felt it didnt

I also didnt find the sort of "twist" with the main character very compelling and the more extreme his actions became the more I became disappointed. Like once you start getting a guy feeding another dude his own leg at a table with a bunch of dead ppl set on chairs with party hats on (even if its intended to be metaphorical) you have killed my suspension of disbelief. Especially since the character work at the beginning of the game felt a lot more grounded it was just like really. I get its horror but thats trite as fuck sorry.

A lot of this comes down to personal preference but if it were me Id have pared down the gameplay so its more towards the visual novel direction and made the scenario and character behaviors toward the end more grounded/real world so the horror comes more from the Real Fucked Up And Horrible Shit That Is Actually Happening, not the abstraction of it. I really found the character dialogue so much more compelling, original, and better at communicating ideas than the metaphorical visuals, so just own that instead. Like i personally wouldnt have had much of this stuff or any at all but again, definitely personal preference, so if it we're going middle ground -- horror visuals can still exist in some form, but i think would be better as a backdrop that fades in and out rather than being something that, in order to experience, you have to totally disengage with the story at hand for long stretches

Another thing I felt and like, sorry this is pretty mean, but as much as people praise the story it really isn't doing much of anything new or different. It's largely well-executed, but as far as sci-fi and horror goes, it's really quite generic. A well-put together combination of a handful of movies and games and whatnot, but rarely much more than the sum of its parts. The moments where it went beyond that were in the very real-life themes and the character work, which again got lost little by little due to its increasing insistence on being an indie horror game. The point for me isn't that everything has to be totally original and not at all contrived, like familiar ideas being well executed can be really really powerful, its more that with all the issues there were i didnt feel the story was strong enough to completely redeem it

Also slowly dawned on me that Anya is pretty much just shelley duvall and it started bothering me like i couldnt stop seeing it

+ I found the writing kind of misogynist. Anya isnt a bad character but if you look at all the individual points of her character its like wow you had to have the singular woman in the cast have literally all of those traits and all of those things happen to her? Its very like 1980s male auteur movie director type shit. And if the shelley duvall thing wasnt a total coincidence that like, especially does not put a good taste in my mouth

Also Swansea fucking rules best character eva

[cheri-2047]

Could you maybe try high school Fem!Scaramouche hc with a huge crush on us but being super reluctant and shy about it?? :3

OKAY. I HAVE NEVER WRITTEN FOR SCARA OKAY PLEASE BEAR WITH ME 😭 also dude ure my first request thank u so much <3

so I didn’t know how to write this but THERE WAS AN ATTEMPT. Anyways basically I’m gonna write a bunch of headcanons then some scenarios under that

Please I’m so sorry if I mischaracterized him I really tried I SWEAE 😭😭😭

This is not proofread btw

WARNINGS: none, it’s all fluff :3

Fem!Scaramouche Headcanons:

HEADCANONS:

Fem!Scara would seem like extremely pissed off to everyone, but she would do small tasks for you that she never does with anyone else

Fem!Scara would do her best to not make it obvious that she likes you. (Even if that means accidentally hurting you with her snarky remarks)

Fem!Scara would be more quiet around you. She doesn’t become as arrogant or stubborn around you, well she would be but just not as much since she cares for you

Fem!Scara ime personally, I don’t think she would be much on physical touch, but if you hugged her she would pay your back and put her chin on your shoulder

Fem!Scara enjoys seeing you be passionate about things. She would listen all day to you and keep eye contact.

Fem!Scara would be very well at hiding when she’s flustered. Like if you’re play flirting with her, she would just end it like “…? What do you expect me to say to that?” When in reality, she’s really giddy inside

Fem!Scara would choose to sit beside you during field trips, or if you go to school via school bus. She says it’s just a coincidence (for field trips) but in reality, she really made it so you Teo sat together

Confession time:

Fem!Scara would be really pleased if you confessed to her first. She wouldn’t say yes immediately, (like instead of going “yes yes!!” She would be in disbelief)

Fem!Scara if she were to confess, she would spend a lot of time thinking how she would do it. She would worry if you said no and I feel like she would spend a week bringing herself down saying you’d never say yes and it’s a waste of time (no it’s not)

Scara enters the school earlier than usual to look for your locker. She had decided to just send a letter. Scara finds it and rereads his letter (for the 100th time today…)

��Dear y/n,

Before I say anything, if you were to say no that’s completely fine. I understand I am not the best, but the truth is, these past few months, I’ve started to develop feelings for you. I just didn’t say or do anything about it well..since I didn’t really want you to know or anyone really. I really really like you, but understand if you would just want to stay friends. Thank you for hearing me out.

-Scara”

SHe hesitantly folds it up again, leaving a candy you really like taped to it as he slips it in the gap of your locker. SHe can barely calm himself down but he goes back to the classroom.

As she sees you, she stiffens up, but tries to remain the same.

“Did she read it?”

“Has she even seen it?”

“Maybe I didn’t write long enough?”

“Ah damn it I barely wrote anything!”

She stares at her lap, not daring to look up. As suddenly when you tap hee table, you mention the letter.

“I saw what you left..”

She immediately PANICS clutching her skirt getting ready for a no. She just laughs it off as if it were nothing to hide that she’s actually a mess inside.

“Haha, well what d’you think?”

She tries to act cocky and stuff. But as you come to terms and conditions (when u say yes) she looks at you in disbelief.

“….is this a joke? Are you lying?”

As you say no it’s not a joke, she then stands up and taps your hand.

“Thank you…”

WOWWOWOWOOWOWOW THIS WAS NOT PROOFREAD AT ALL AHHAHAHAH. Anyways uhhh if anyone else wants to request smth, go ahead. School just ended so I have nothing to do for the next few months. Once again, my bad if I accidentally mischaracterized her. I really tried ok. ANYWAYS THANK U, U DONT KNOW HOW HAPPY I AM THAT SOMEONE ACTUALLY REQUESTES SMTH FROM ME LIKE I KID U NOT I GOT REALLT HAPPY AT LIKE 6 AM😭😭😭 anyways thank u again omg I hope this was ok 😭😭

[galacticghoste]

OK im a speak my thoughts on the movie, I'm a try to cover everything i remember

Obviously don't take what I say too seriously it's just my opinion

Spoilers obviously

OK LET ME JUST SAY

I LOVVVVVVEEEEEEDDDD THE MOVIE IT WAS FREAKING AWESOME ME AND MY FRIEND KEPT FAN GIRLING AT RANDOM SCENES AND REFERENCES

Which btw LOVE ALL THE REFERENCES I know i probably missed a bunch but a fun one someone pointed out to me was when sonic say a back to the future quote I didn't even notice 😅

Also Knuckles being afraid of ghost makes sense i keep forgetting i played Adv2 and friend reminded me that oh yeah he dose fear ghost even Casper

"There are no friendly ghost" 🤣

Anyways now MARIA GHAAAAAAAA I LOVED HER SHE SO SWEET AND CUTE AND IT IS NICE TO SEE HER JUST BE A NORMAL KID WHO JUST HAPPEND TO LIVE WITH HER GRANDFATHER and also the fact she roller skates, plays music and dose arts which IM SO GLAD ABOUT HEHEH and was just being a kid was just so sweet

The way she finds a way to get shadow out of the lab and it's by using a teddy bear my HEART and maria being reckless and a bit of trouble maker is SO HER

And and she used shadow as a way to get around faster hit me at my childhood I was shadow as a kid my lil cuz would tie a rope to my bike and I would just bike around as they did nothing. 🤣

BUT LOOK

Idk i feel like the movie needed more time to get more things fleshed out it dosent fully feel like they got everything there

Seeing the film now i understand why Amy or anyone else couldn't be in it their just wasn't enough time

though I already knew this i just felt like complaining about it bc I was grieving the fact they took Amy's scene but since in the movie shadow doesnt lose his memories so Amy wouldn't be able to do much and helping him remember if their nothing to remember it wouldn't be impactful, i do hope they interactat some point they are a cute duo

I think more time was needed too because of Director rockwell, you saw the way she started taking charge and looking like she was gonna take over Commander Walter's place and be new leader it felt like there was gonna be more with her like a betrayal and turn over power to her making herself the leader and those could explain why commander Walter just give the key to sonic bc idk why trust him so easly WITH THE KEY TO DESTROYING THE FUCKING PLANET???

Also the fact the Donut Lord was able to just easly fool her didn't feel satisfying she gave up way to fast for someone who looked like her roles were gonna lead to something even if it was just plane hate for sonic and his friends.

Also I can see why shadow may not like tails Bro literally almost drowned him and stone and interrupted his Novela and didnt even let him eat his "Revenge Guacamole"

(The fact shadow named it that was so CUTE bc ahhh sweet boy my heart!)

Also i do like how shadow remained loyal to Gerald throughout the whole thing really shows how much he cares about the family he as left and how he was fine with dieing if it ment avenging Maria

But I find it interesting that he questions his action a bit late like dude you just now thought about that? I think it would have been better if he questions his action from the beginning but kept using the excuse that this is what Maria wanted or something like that it would given maybe a bit more build up to what Gerald says to him to make him stop questions it

Obviously their no way Maria wanted to destroy the earth even Gerald knew that yet never says it out loud just says "remember what they took from us" and that was enough for shadow to stop thinking about it

Also THE FUCKING FACT SHADOW JUST BEEN LIVING THE SAME NIGHTMARE FOR 50 YEARS HURTS ME POOR GUY

And the fact he says that the sadness was kinda what he got use to and ever knew

(I kin i just dont have nightmares my brain just like to remind me of stuff)

Also did the government just keep him alive bc he was some alien from another planet?

Also he didn't seem to be too young when. He arrived to earth so dose he have amnesia from wherever he was from what was his childhood before maria did he even have one? U would think they would have diesected him and study him while be was put to sleep/frozen for so long

He's been reliving the same events for so long but one day it was enough to wake him up thx to Gerald

Also DOES GEROLD GO TO Comicons?!?! bc ahhh he was saveing that giant arm for it XD

Also speaking on Maria again I'm a bit disappointed by the fact they decide to not cover the fact that Maria was sick or that shadow was supposed to be a cure for her as well as a weapon

I need more scene of the both of them and their lives back in the research facility

I don't think the cover much on him even being the ultimate life form at all or the other experiment or the FACT THEY ARE NOT IN SPACE

I FUCKING KNEW IT I FUCKING KNEW THEY WEREN'T IN SPACE THE SCENES WE GOT WERE ENOUGH PROOF TO SHOW IT HEHHEEHEHEHEH

Its a bit disappointing It doesnt feel as impactful when shadow dose get to step outside for the first time

ALSO I ALREADY WISH WE GOT THE SCENE OF MARIA SAYING SAYONARA AND SHADOW BEING DEPRESSED IN THE TUBE AS HE LANDS TO EARTH

The closest thing to it was when he was captured and tased to enter the tube again and the look of betrayal and sadness and later anger in his face AHHH

His back story in this one is giving Venom vibes with the space rock and him being inside it like its a fucking egg, HE IS LITERALLY JUST AN ALIEN he's NOT SOME SCIENCE EXPERIMENT LIKE WHAT?!?!

Where was he from is he still from the same planet as sonic?

I AM curious on what this will lead to and if we learn more I HOPE WE DO bc that movie did NOT COVER ENOUGH ON THAT SHIT

ALSO THE FACT SHADOW REACTS THE WAY HE DOES WHEN HE SEES SONIC SPECIFICALLY MAKES TOTAL SENSE

HE has never seen another hedgehog

HECK IM WILLING TO BET HE DIDNT EVEN KNOW HE WAS POSSIBLY ONE UNTILL THEN

HE literally would ask Maria if she's scared of him bc he knows everyone else is afraid of him and was worried Maria may be afraid too AHH POOR BABY (no more monster movies for him)

But yeah a bit disappointed I KNOW THEY AINT GONNA DO EVERYTHING THE SAME IM NOT THAT STUPID BUT IDK I JUST FEEL like they only cut that shit out bc they didn't have time which if that's the case it might as well been a two parter film it would give more time to flesh out the characters and give more impact to emotional scenes

(Who knows if they make TV show it would help cover some backstory on him)

Bc that scene with the commander didn't hit i didn't feel too much sympathy and I know i should but the scene wasn't giveing it for me

NOW A SCENE THAT WAS IMPACTFUL

Was when Gerald said to Egg man "your no Maria" I FELT SO BAD FOR EGG MAN

UGH MY POOR DUDE

No but Literally he was in a orphanage his whole life and he ever bothered to get him

Im guessing egg man was born while Gerald may have been in jail or he just didn't care enough.

He either never knew about him or didn't care bc i know he was in jail but egg man is probably a similar age Maria was back then so him never bothering to get him just means he only cared for Maria and kinda shadow he did say KIDS and instead of Just referring to Maria so I think he still got crazy at some point while in jail.

But I wonder why they Commander lied

Yes their was an accident that could have been avoided but it wasn't because of shadow it was bc some dumb ass who decided to shot at some kids and an old man they missed but it cost Maria her life

also why the hell is shadow not reacting more strongly to Maria's death that was his fucking sister

I DONT THINK I SAW A SINGLE TEAR FROM HIM AND THAT DOESNT MAKE SENSE HE IS KNOWN TO CRY AT LEAST A BIT FOR LOSING MARIA BRO SHOULD HAVE BEEN SCREAMING IN PAIN BUT NOPE SILANCE AND ANGER UGHH WHY CANT CHARACTERS CRY ANYMORE not even the memory of it made him cry

Also HOW AND THE HELL IS IT that shadow was just being studied so lightly if he really is and full on Alien bro would have been diesected by now or at least have scars or memory's of it but nope nothing

(YES I KNOW ITS A FUCKING KIDS FILM IM JUST SAYING SHIT would make WAY MORE SENSE IF THEY AT LEAST MENTION IT if they didnt want to show it)

Also i was expecting him to be a bit more edgey i dont mind that he isn't but idk he just seemed depressed the enter movie poor guy needs therapy

I found if sweet that egg man got to expramce everything he missed out of In the film (probably what shadow wanted for him and maria)

Its interesting how shadow and Maria don't have to many lines together it feels like she only talked 1 or twice and that's it i wish their was MORE OF THEM

Also i found it interesting how shadow kept mentioning during their fight that sonic became just like him when it came to revenge and how he kept mentioning that sonic left to fight him against his friends wishes it feels like he saying he shouldn't have made the choice he did kinda like saying he would have done better if he was in his position or like he should be grateful (idk that's just my view on that scene i liked it)

Also the way sonic tells shadow that the pain doesn't go away but he can change the way he views that pain and how he can remember that the love he had for her will always stay

Its sweet but didn't feel that impactful as I thought it would be the word were but idk i think they should have lingered a bit more on the scene or something it feels a bit fast paste at time.

ALSO HAS ANYONE SEEN SHADOWS EYES ARE PINK WHEN HE GOES SUPER?!?!?!?! YESSSSSSSSZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZAHHHHHH

Also LOVE HOW SHADOW AND SONIC BATTLE TOGETHER IN THE END THEY WERE AWESOME

But then in the final part when trying to stop the laser from killing the earth later separate them with sonic kinda takeing the place of shadow falling scene and shadow just goes poof for a bit

bro literally just cares to get a task done and not save anyone he doesnt save stone when their place was flooded and now sonic

Also glad eggman still kinda pissed on the moon

BRO HAD ME WORRIED FOR A MOMENT THAT HE MAY BE DEAD BUT NOPE HE GOOD AHHHHHHHHHHHH AND THE WAY HIM AND EGG MAN DID SACRIFICE THEMSELVES TOO?!?! UGH THE BLISS SHADOW MUST HAVE FELT TO MAYBE REST IN PEACE AND EGG MAN REDMETION ARC WITH STONE WHILE IN AN ARK AHHHHHH I LOVE THEM SO MUCH HE CARES AHH

But I was SO SCARED THAT SHADOW REALLY DEAD IN THAT ONE my friend had to keep reassuring me that he's not dead they wouldn't let him die but i was like BUT THEY COULD?!?!

But nope they were right he alright 👍🏼

OK MY BIGGEST JOY WAS SEEING AMY

FUCKING YESSSSSSSSSSS I FUCKING HAD A FEELING IT WAS GONNA BE HER IT HAD TO BE IF THEY DECIDED TO CUT HER FROM THAT FUCKING FILM AND NOT JUST HER BUT METAL SONIC TOO??? BUT NOW WHO MADE METAL???

I have so many questions not enough answers anyways fuck you I think Amy is important and im so FUCKING GLAD SHE FINALLY SHOWS UP AHH GIRLY IS IMPORTANT and she gonna be a battle machine AHHH

Can't wait to see her reason from fighting all those robots who are METAL!!!

[discoveredreality]

intro post <3

don't mind me editing this like every single day lol

my dm's and askbox is always open if u want to talk <3

anons are welcome too <3

also if u want to make new friends i am right here pls say hi im fucking lonely😭

anyways

BELOVED MOOTS <33333 (everyone is tagging them and this is fun)

this in no particular order just whoever pops up on my dash or smth idk. not every moots just the ones i actually know lol. ok so

@im-ur-sleep-paralysis-demon THEY'RE AMAZING LOVE THEM SM IF U DON'T FUCK OFF BECAUSE OMG KJHLGJKFJHLKYFJHKJGL

@ma-lan13 HELP MY BESTIE IRL GOT TUMBLR OMG OMG. AND SHES ACTUALLY USING IT WTF?????? ANYWAYS SHES THE BEST <333

@bloophasarrived SHE'S THE SWEETEST AND SO WONDERFUL. HER PERSONALITY SPARKLES AND OMG SHE'S SO FUN AHHH

@marylily-my-beloved I LOVE HERRR WE HAVE THE BEST CONVERSATIONS. SO NICE AND EASY TO TALK TO. AND WHY DOES SHE KNOW ME SO WELL <3333

@im-just-here4853 my vent buddy omg we just vent to each other i love her so much idk what i would do without her <33

@im-on-crack-send-help TWINNING IN LITERALLY EVERYTHING. SAME MUSIC TASTE. SAME TASTE IN FOOD. IN DRINKS. IN THE WAY WE THINK. WTF. ANYWAYS SHE'S MY POOKIE I LOVE HER <333

@the-gay-skeleton-in-ur-closet THEY'RE THE BEST OMGGGGG and they're nice and cool and shit <333333 i'm quoting myself it's fine AND LIKE SO NICE AND GOOFY AND EVERYTHING OMG

@cubemagnet somene i met on a random post and now we occasionally team up to correct grammar lol 🤓🤓🤓 anyways she's amazing :D and everything she says is so iconic like isjflsrijglruhglsuglijrsg

@book-girl4eva SHE'S AMAZINGGGGG. IT'S SO EASY TO GOOF AROUND W HER I LOVE IT. SHE ALWAYS SLAYS SO HARD. EVERYTHING ABOUT HER SLAYS. idk if you'll see this but this is for u pookie <3

@mil-pinterest-sss-here-i-am ??? questioning why we're moots. but he's literally so nice. literally will be my therapist and help me w maths because that shit is impossible 😭

@dandelionflowery omg literally so kind and everything all the time. so fun fun reading their fics and doing shit together omg

@sweetwarmcookies16 OMG RIJGDJFGIJFGIF THE BEST I LOVE PLAYING GAMES TOGETHER AND TALKING AND EVERYTHING. ALSO AN AMAZING WRITER

idk brain isnt braining ill add ppl as i go along

moodboards made by my lovely lovely moots <3

so far i only have one here cause i forgot to link the previous ones whoops 😭😭😭

about me

i'm ari. she/her. nicknames welcome. go wild. dude/bro/girl/literally anything is also fine. i use 'lol' and '<3' too much. minor. literally the biggest procrastinator and so disorganised i dare u to find someone worse than me. i'm indian but i live in australia. bengali/north indian idk. band kid :D my pinterest is here. PLEASE DM ME IF U WANT TO. I NEED FRIENDS. IM AWKWARD AND BAD AT MAKING CONVERSATION BUT STILL PLS 😭😭😭

personality/star sign or whatever

according to the mbti test here i am an istp-t. i am also a cancer. i found out my sun, moon and rising signs and the marauders version and i wrote it down and lost it so then i redid it and i lost it again so i can't bother at this point someone help me :(

time zone

Australian Eastern Standard Time (AEST) i think?? SUCK ON THAT AMERICANS AND WHOEVER ELSE EHHEHEHHEHE ;LSDJFSFJIJFDJF;LJ

my music taste

i love taylor swift, conan gray, olivia rodrigo, sabrina carpenter and honestly a lot of other stuff lol. also love bollywood music.

favourite books and authors

i love reading and i'm usually a really fast reader lol. i love harry potter (fuck jkr tho), kotlc, chetan bhagat books, the inheritance games, agggtm, literally all of karen m. mcmanus's books, the divergent series, pjo and hoo, lorien legacies, the selection, powerless, soc, girl in pieces, dictionary of lost words and bookbinder of jericho, all the books by amish, and a bunch of other books.

dni

idk the usual?? if u think ppl arent valid or you're literally an asshole. honestly you all can go get stuffed. idgaf

tag games and shit

yes you can absolutely tag me. i love tag games and chain asks. sometimes i may not get to doing it but i usually will and it makes me so happy when i'm tagged lol

tags

i don't post that much stuff so i don't really have mulitple tags for my posts. anything or any shitposting or thoughts will be tagged #ari's shit. for asks it's #ari gets an ask?

fandoms!

i'm literally obsessed with drarry but i'm mostly part of the marauders fandom. i'm starting to make my way through all of the marauders fics. i love love love hermitcraft. i'm an ethogirl literally who doesn't love etho?? also really into trafficblr. i literally love six of crows so much like omg. desperately trying to get through the magnus archives im only 8 years late haha i also love kotlc sm. (team foster-keefe forever!) i'm low-key in love with keefe sencen cause omg. aaaand also a bunch of other shit but those are the main ones idk bro

i'm bored and this is too long already might as well add more so here are a bunch of userboxes :D

and that's all not because i have self control but because there is a limit to images per post 😭😭😭 i literally had to delete some of my aesthetic images for this soooo

all the above photos are not mine, i got them off of pintrest.

my profile pic is obviously from the makowka picrew here

the beautiful dividers are linked here. these are by @saradika-graphics she is a literal star these dividers are so good

IK THIS IS WAY TOO FUCKING LONG AND I KEEP ON ADDING SHIT MORE SHIT SO IF U ACTUALLY LIKE READ TO THE BOTTOM THIS HERE IS FOR U LMFAO ILYSM <333333

[cringearenachamp]

So I've posted a bunch of more serious pop analysis essay type writing on here, but I also do ficcy type stuff! Which i was very nervous about sharing at first for various reasons but then i remembered... dude. im the cringe arena champ. come on.

i even put it on a geocities-like website so you get the experience of trawling through the wayback machine to find fics written in 2002! lol. (i think at some point you'll be able to post comments and stuff-- might need an account-- but that's gated for now because i'm a noob. its also extremely bare-bones looking for the same reason lol. at some point it'll probably have a prettier background) (update: it's still very basic but now the background is a nice soothing lavender color~)

the fic itself is insanely long-- i started writing this a few years ago for shits and giggles (and armchair-psychoanalyzing-my-blorbo reasons)-- and i am gradually uploading all i have so far, which is first- person journal-esque chapters, with each chapter representing a single year from 1977 to 1987.

beyond that tho: yea its alternate universe type shit but not *too* alternate. everyone's name is different (some more than others-- gregg is simply greg lmao), but they represent the same people, for example. it's kind of like 'journey' is a stage play and they're different people playing the same roles, and i do play around a little with some meta stuff because of that. content warnings and stuff are at the top of each section they're needed, but there's an overview before everything else that goes further into detail about everything i just talked about here.

i also have some one-offs that are basically all gay-horny and silly that i'll probably post on Fridays (i already have one up on there so... that one's for this friday hehe) 😇 ok enjoy if that is your fancy~

[minijenn]

Weird/Dumb UF Comments from Across the Years

Feeling spicy and nostalgic for some of the bullshit I've had to put up with both in the old UF era and the new so I figured I'd compile some of the most insane and pathetic comments I've gotten on the fic (and on other fics about UF because people are really that dumb) and share them with you because some of these you really can't make up. These people speak for themselves in the way they act about a goddamn fanfiction of all things, so have a whole bunch of them (some with context, some without) for your enjoyment. Mind you these are primarily from across FF.net, AO3, tumblr asks, and DeviantArt, most of them are anon comments because Cowardice, and all of them are 100% fucking real things I've gotten in the past and had to look at with my own eyes so now you do too. So with that said, Let's go:

Let's start with some relatively recent stuff, like this DeviantArt comment I got the other day:

Chat is it homophobic to tell a bisexual that their comfort ship is a fetish?

I... ok. (I'm very tired)

Ok this is a really stupid take when you consider Connie wasn't even in over half of Steven Universe episodes but go off I guess (dude parrots this point constantly like jesus you're so boring get some new material bro)

That feel when you reboot your fanfic and people are still mad about it

Now, let's throw it back to old UF and that time someone threatened to kill my cats (no really) on top of hitting on me??? Bruh

Oh we just straight up out here being polyphobic ok

I don't even know what to say about this one its just... bonkers

This one's just become a straight up meme over on my discord and you can probs tell why

Meltdown on main ig (heads up there's a slur in this one)

And ya'll wondered why I stopped writing old UF like...???

Again. Literal fucking temper tantrum

The way people put UF up on this goddamn pedistal like christ my guy its just a silly fanfic oy

There are three types of UF fans...

When you leave aimless nonsense comments on all three of an author's fics but in the end you still are basically screaming into the void

This one was on Keys and I... (raises hand) you know what? (puts hand down) Not worth it.

Chat is it weird to simp over a random fanfic writer you never met to an unhealthy degree

Man I guess this dude has never seen the metric fuckton billion GF AU fics out there also wow ok

Chat is it queerbaiting to slow burn to a ship that is eventually gonna be canon

Actual mysogynist moment (these people really had no shame)

Jesus (again slur warning)

Fucking big pharma??? huh??? DRAFTED???? BRUH

Yeah idk if I can top that level of crazy so that's all I got for now but hey maybe I'll revisit this post in the future. or not, idk fuck it fuck all this Im gonna go take a nap

[chikkou]

ok i was waiting until my laptop got here to finally tell all the bullshit thats happened in the last like. 5 months lol. cause its a lot to type

im gonna put it all under the cut so no one has to read if they dont want. its a LONG fucking story.

tl;dr:

ok so for basic background, for the last two years or so, i was living with a roommate in connecticut. the roommate was my (now former) best friend since middle school. in july of this year his behavior totally shifted, and he started picking fights with me out of nowhere, told our high school friends a bunch of straight up lies abt me to make me look like a horrible roommate & person, and just generally became a two-faced dickhead. in the end, it turned out to all be excuses to justify his decision to move out (unofficially, name was still on the lease) so that he could live with his boyfriends and not pay any bills. at the time i was really devastated by this bc i felt totally betrayed by this person i had been close to since i was 12/13, but frankly after everything else that happened i barely fucking think about it now LMAO. this is set dressing more than anything else

so anyway, i had been living alone since about august, that was the last time i saw him in person. i wasnt handling the situation well because i had spoken to my high school friend and found out the extent to which hed tried to paint me as a slovenly, horrible roommate, to the point of telling actual lies about really dumb stuff (which didnt work btw - my friends, god bless them, were more concerned about my mental health than anything and thought i was going down a depression spiral, which my former friend told them he was helping me through. they believed me right away once we finally did talk). all that is to say, i was going kind of crazy lol, and i decided to go back home in october just for a short while, to recharge my batteries and all.

i was gone for a couple of weeks, not very long. i felt MUCH better after being with my family & friends in person, as i felt pretty isolated from everyone (my hometown is in new york, i was only 2 hours away by train but scheduling times to visit was sort of a hassle, so i only did it once every couple months). my grandfather and mom dropped me off at my apartment in early november, we were very lighthearted and discussing my next steps, since my shithead friend had been behind on rent more than 5 times (i always paid my half on time) and i was facing eviction because of it. we get to my apartment, i go to open the door, and it wont open. not that its locked, it just straight up WONT open. my grandpa tried to ram the door with his shoulder, and nothing. hes a strong ass dude, and this door wouldnt budge for anything.

my mom managed to get the kitchen window open and climb in that way, and it took both her and my grandpa pulling/pushing at the same time to force the door open. i wont even dress this up: there was mold. fucking. everywhere. on the floor, on the walls, all over everything i owned. i have pictures (had to take them for insurance) and im not even going to show them because they are beyond fucking disgusting. everything i owned was soaked in water and mold, and i do literally mean EVERYTHING. it was very warm in there too, like the temperature of a swamp. i was in a haze after that. i just remember sobbing, like genuinely heartbroken sobbing, as i wandered around looking at everything that was ruined. my mom & grandpa had to go and get maintenance because i was just utterly useless, and they were equally horrified & said they'd never seen anything like it.

i managed to save some items that were irreplaceable (journals, notebooks, etc) and whatever clothes werent utterly soaked in mold. all of my cookware, my books, my laptop & desktop (i cried the hardest when i saw the desktop) - it was all ruined. we found out later that the water boiler in my apartment had a catastrophic failure while i was gone, which caused it to constantly send water back through the pipes, empty, and refill itself. my bedroom was directly above the boiler downstairs, so it got the most significant amount of damage. all told, i lost like 95% of the things i owned. it is possible that i could have saved more, but the amount of mold in that apartment made it a genuine safety hazard for me to even be in there, so i had very limited time to grab what i could. the cruelest irony of all that? my shithead ex-friend's room, which was on the other side of the hallway, was pretty much untouched. he lost absolutely nothing lol.

so immediately, i had to leave the state. i moved back to ny with my family. my mother - who had a stroke last year following a diagnosis of an exceedingly rare neurological disorder, AND had two separate brain surgeries to improve her quality of life - was in the process of getting evicted. the landlord didnt give a fuck about any of my moms situation, not her being disabled, not her being widowed, not her having 3 kids under the age of 18 to care for - he just wanted her out so he could increase the cost of rent on our house. at the same time as all this was going on, i got saddled with a $600 electric bill (likely caused by the water heater's malfunction), which neither insurance nor the apartment would pay, so it came out of my pocket. in addition, i found out in december that i was also getting laid off.

we had nowhere to go and couldnt afford to live anywhere in the tri-state area. we had no choice but to move somewhere much cheaper, and since my mom already had a friend living in a mid-atlantic state, we chose to move there. the eviction went through in january and we had less than 2 weeks to pack all our shit, find a place to live, and get the fuck out. needless to say, we were not successful lol.

we stayed in my grandparents 1 bedroom apartment for about a week, then all of us drove down together to stay with my moms friend in her 3 bedroom apartment (she has 5 kids, 3 of whom live in the apartment). my moms apartment, which was supposed to have been ready by january 31st, still had people actively living there. the property manager kept promising us it would be next week for the entire month of february, to the point that my mom got fed up and chose to rent a small house instead. the reality of being essentially homeless for that time was beyond horrifying, and having anywhere between 8-10 people in that house (my cousin also moved with us, but he stayed in a hotel for the first week) was more taxing than i can express.

but things have gotten a lot better since then. i also found a cute little house to rent just up the road from my moms, and its very cheap for its size. i still havent found a job yet, but thanks to what was essentially the liquidation of everything i owned, ill be ok for a couple months more. im slowly but surely repurchasing all the things i lost and trying to acclimate to the new environment. things are still not totally stable right now, but they are slowing down, and at this point thats all i can really ask for lol.

so yeah. if u were wondering why i suddenly stopped posting after literal years of posting every day, thats why LMAO