#answer: i just like messing around with dynamic posing :3

[10-59]

you ever been beaten up by a guy in a dress + bonding time w/ dheerse

[wannab-urs]

You’re So Dark

Pairing: Professor!Dave York x Grad Student!f!Reader

Summary: There’s only one thing you really want out of this conference – your research adviser, Dave York. 

Warnings: smut, professor/student relationship, reader is a brat, this is very close to a self insert fic so she’s also a cocky little asshole, power dynamics, age gap (Dave is in his late 40s, reader is at least 21 but not specified), Dave is conflicted, that’s why he’s such a dickhead, Divorced!Dave, drinking but no one is all that intoxicated, unprotected PIV (but he has a vasectomy and reader is on BC), creampie, oral f!receiving, lots of arguing, no use of y/n. WC: 2.4k

A/N: Based on a true story. Just had this idea out of nowhere, don’t look at me. Thanks to @pedgito for the beta <3

Dave York Masterlist | Main Masterlist | AO3 | Kofi | Playlist

You knock on his door, wearing nothing but a skimpy tank top and shorts. The conference doesn’t start for a while, so you put on comfy clothes following the long car ride. That’s not your only motivation, though, for showing up at his hotel room in barely anything. 

The hotel is nice, nice enough that you feel underdressed in the hallway. You’re set to present your paper on John Donne today at 2. Your research adviser Dr. York – Dave – had picked you up at your apartment at 5 this morning to drive you both to the conference. He’s presenting his latest paper. Something about journals kept by British people during World War II. 

You shift your weight from foot to foot waiting for him to answer the door. Finally, you hear the chain drop and the door opens. He eyes you up and down, one eyebrow quirked, before turning around and walking back into the room. 

“Are you wearing that to the conference?” He’s already settling back into the shitty desk chair by the window. You look down at your outfit and then back up to glare at the back of his head. 

“Yeah. Obviously.” You lay back on his bed and stretch your back, sore from the 5 hour car ride. 

“What are you doing?” 

“Working.” 

You roll onto your stomach and look at him. The mid morning light casts a glare over his screen, but only serves to highlight his features. You hate how pretty he is, how much you want him.

“Are you wearing that to the conference?” He’s wearing navy dress pants and a tight white t-shirt that is definitely a size too small. 

“I have a dress shirt.” He seems irritated today. Shoulders tense, sentences clipped. You wonder if it’s you that has him all worked up. 

You slide off the bed into the floor and go through some simple yoga poses. Your back is really messed up from that car ride. You sit on your knees and walk your hands forward as far as they’ll go, dropping your head to the floor. You sigh as you sink into child’s pose, feeling the stretch in your sore hips and back. “What are you working on?” You ask, voice muffled by the carpet. 

“Will you shut up?” You snap your head up to look at him. He’s fucking tetchy today… and he hasn’t looked over at you once, as far as you can tell. 

“Make me.”

“When have I ever been able to make you do anything?” 

You sit back on your heels and tilt your head to the side. He’s almost shaking, he’s so tense. You’ve never seen him like this. “You never ask nicely.”

He wordlessly scoots his chair back and spreads his legs, still typing away on his laptop. You crawl over and settle yourself between his legs. He still doesn’t look at you.

“What do you want, Dave?” 

“For you to stop talking.”

“Is that all you want?”

“No.”

“Tell me what you want.”

“You’re such a fucking brat.”

You lean in and drag your lips over the bulge in his slacks, hear the sharp snatch of breath, the clack of keys as his hands hit them all at once. 

You’re not going to do it until he tells you to and he isn’t going to ask. It’s a standoff. He thinks he has to let you make the first move. Does this not count as a first move? You in such a supplicant pose, gazing up at him from between his thighs. 

“You should go get dressed. We have to leave soon.” Quiet, strained, so unlike his usually smooth and confident cadence, and still not meeting your eyes. He rolls the chair back so you have room to scoot out. 

Your cheeks sting with rejection, but you know he wants you as bad as you want him. He’s just afraid of the consequences. You slip out from under his desk and retreat to your room to get changed. 

–-

The conference goes as smoothly as it can – it was your first ever presentation at something like this, and you definitely got tripped up on some of the questions the audience asked you. Afterward, Dave drags you outside to a group of people. He introduces you to Will, Laurie, Anna, and Doug. They’re colleagues, friends, that he often meets up with at conferences. 

“Wanna come with us to get drinks?” Anna asks. 

“Sure!” you agree before Dave can turn them down. He scowls at you, but turns a megawatt smile on when he looks back to Anna. 

“Sounds good,” he says through his teeth. 

Dave gossips in your ear all night, filling you in on each of his friends. Will and Laurie are both supposedly polyamorous and only hook up with each other at conferences, but Dave knows Will’s wife has no idea. Anna is in trouble with her school for a presentation she did last year, and she had to have today’s presentation reviewed by her department chair before she could present. Doug has a thing for Anna, but she’s married. 

The gossip is a good holdover, but you’re antsy the whole time. You sip vodka sodas slowly while your mind whirs with the possibilities of tonight. Dave drinks whiskey on the rocks, jokes with his friends when he’s not whispering in your ear. 

You and Dave go out to smoke, leaving everyone else in the bar. You split an American Spirit with him. 

“If you only smoke when you drink, why do you have a near empty pack of expensive cigarettes?” 

“I drink every night.” 

“God you’re pathetic.” 

“Not as pathetic as the grad student with a thing for her professor.” 

“Fuck you. You’re not my professor.” 

“Oh, so you do have a thing for me?”

You’d thought that was obvious from your earlier attempt to blow him.

 “You know what’s actually pathetic, Dave? The professor who wants to fuck his student.” 

“You’re not my student.”

 “Oh, so you do want to fuck me?” 

He puts out the cigarette in the ashtray and stalks off inside. 

By the end of the night, you regret agreeing to go out, desperate to get back to the hotel and get Dave alone. This may be your only shot at getting what you want from him and you can’t waste it. You say goodnight to everyone, tell them how nice it was to meet them all, and head out, Dave close behind you. You think you catch Laurie giving him a knowing look, but you can’t be certain. 

You walk back to the hotel, your arm brushing his. Out of nowhere, Dave chuckles and pushes his shoulder into you. 

“What? What’s funny?”

“Nothing. I like that you step on the sewer grates.”

“What?”

“The drainage grates. My ex wife was terrified of them. She’d rather walk in the street than step on one. You don’t even hesitate.”

“Oh.”

“I just mean– I don’t know what I mean. You’re brave.”

“Thanks,” you say earnestly, looking into his eyes. 

“You’re welcome.” He averts his gaze, looks back down at the ground. You think he might be blushing. 

You get to the hotel and the lady at the desk gives you and Dave a strange look. An “I know what this is and I don’t like it” look. You roll your eyes and stalk over to the elevators, punching the button with more force than necessary. You didn’t think it was that obvious, the dance you two were doing around each other. 

The ride up to the tenth floor is tense. Dave doesn’t look at you, doesn’t say a word. When you get up to where you’re supposed to split off, he asks if you want to come to his room for a drink. You say yes and follow him to his room. Now the nerves really kick in. It’s fine, you’re fine. You wonder if he’s gonna reject you again. It would be cruel after inviting you to his room, but he’s never really been kind. 

When you get into his room you sit on the bed and take off your dress shoes, your coat, and the blazer you’ve been wearing all day. He pours himself a bourbon from the minibar and offers you one. You take the cup in your hand, sipping the liquor and feeling heat trail down your throat. He knocks his back in one shot and stands in front of you at the bed.

You stand up, putting you inches from his body. You cover his bulge with your hand, squeezing lightly and nip your teeth at his throat. “Do you want to fuck me, Dave?” 

He shoves you backward with a growl and you fall on the bed. He tugs your trousers off and lowers himself between your legs. He licks you over your panties, feeling how wet you already are. He hooks his fingers into the gusset of your panties, knuckles brushing your entrance. 

“Oh you’re soaked for me, baby girl.” 

“Don’t call me that. Ew. God. Ew.”

“Fine. Brat.” Dave tugs your panties down and tosses them on the floor. He pushes your thighs apart and settles your legs over his shoulders. He covers your cunt with his mouth and flicks his tongue against your clit. You let out a moan and bury your fingers in his short hair. He flattens his tongue against you and you ride his face, grinding his aquiline nose into your mound as you move against him. 

He brings a hand up to press your stomach down, holding you still while he slips two fingers of his other hand inside you. You keen loudly at the stretch, squirming as he sucks your clit into his mouth. 

You’re so wet you can hear the wet squelch of your pussy around his fingers. He crooks them upward and you buck your hips hard enough to break the hold he has on you. 

“F-Fuck, Dave. Please,” you whine. 

“So polite when you finally get what you want,” he mutters into your cunt. 

He’s making you feel so fucking good, you’d let him say anything right now. He strokes your sweet spot almost methodically, like he’s had a lifetime of practice that led him here, making you whine and moan and squirm pathetically on just two of his fingers. Your grip tightens on his hair as you feel white hot bliss crawling up your spine. 

“Fuck. Dave. Gonna come.”

He doesn’t let up, the firm strokes of his fingers driving you higher and higher until finally you reach your peak and come crashing back down. You shatter, your pussy clenching rhythmically. 

“Can I fuck you?” Dave’s voice is rough and low like he’s been yelling.

“Do you have a condom?” 

“Do I need one?” 

“I mean I’m on birth control” 

“Oh I got snipped when I divorced Carol, that’s not what I meant” 

“They had vasectomies in the 1800s?”

“Are you clean or not?” 

“It’s a little fucking late to ask that, man, you just had your tongue inside me, but yeah.” 

“Fair enough.”

Dave helps you up the bed until your head rests on the pillows. He takes your shirt off, stripping your bra with it. He’s fully dressed and you’re bare before him. He leans down and kisses your neck, before his lips trail down to your chest. He sucks a mark into the soft skin of your breast. You start unbuttoning his shirt but he just pulls it off over his head, an urgency that wasn’t there before taking hold. 

“Need to be inside you, fuck.” 

He shucks his slacks down as far as possible without getting up and immediately slots his length against your slit. You reach down and adjust him yourself, lining up the tip with your entrance. He mutters something about “impatient” but pushes inside you anyway. He’s long and thick and he makes you feel so full. When he’s fully sheathed inside you, your eyes roll back in your head with pleasure. 

“Fuck. You’re huge, Dave. Fuck,” you whine, as if he needed the ego boost. 

You gasp his name as he starts fucking you, your fingernails digging into the skin at his sides. You pull him into you, urging him to fuck you harder. He growls and picks up the pace, the slapping of your skin, your loud moans, his grunts fill the room. 

You get lost in it a little, your mind slipping into that space where all you can think about is the sensation of his cock spearing you over and over. 

He slips a hand between your bodies and presses the pads of his fingers to your clit, rubbing in small circles. You throw your head back and scream his name as a wave of pleasure crashes over you. Dave fucks you through it, thrusts slowing but not stopping yet. 

“Where?”

It takes you a second to process what he’s asking. Where do you want his cum? 

“Inside. Please.”

“So polite. Fucked the brat right out of you, huh?”

You’re too fucked out to respond with a witty comment, so he must be right. He thrusts into you deep and you feel his cock pulse as he spills inside you. The sensation almost makes you feel like you could come again. 

He pulls out as soon as he’s finished, rolling to his feet and heading into the bathroom. The bastard doesn’t even seem winded. He comes back from the bathroom holding a wet washcloth in his hand. Dave wipes up the mess between your thighs and tosses the rag onto the floor.  

It’s after he’s cleaned you up and is standing in front of the bed that you notice his body. He’s more lean and muscled than you could really see beneath his dress shirts. You wonder idly if you’ll ever see him like this again. His bare, broad chest. His happy trail leading down to his unbuttoned slacks. 

He strips off his pants, leaving him in his briefs. His thighs are toned too. You kind of wish you’d gotten to explore his body more thoroughly. He crawls into bed and lays beside you, but doesn’t fit his body against yours the way you want him to. Never one to not get exactly what you want, you snuggle up to his side, throwing your arm across his chest. He readjusts and holds you close. 

“Didn’t take you for a cuddler.” 

“Didn’t take you for a missionary guy. Guess we’re both full of surprises.” 

“Don’t act like you didn’t fucking love it.” 

You hum noncommittally. It was probably the best sex of your life, but he doesn’t need to know that. 

[planetdream]

— TASTE OF LUST !

this post contains; smut [foursome. d/s dynamics—yeonjun’s kinda mean. anal play. double penetration. spit. breath play. many vibrators. dirty talk.] kinda yeonjun centered but not really.

pairing: choi yeonjun x jung wooyoung x hwang hyunjin x reader | words: 3057

💌 note at the end <3

There’s a question posed by Yeonjun that you can hardly hear due to the ringing in your ears. You’re not too entirely sure if the static is there; the frequency being too quiet to recognize, but loud enough to not be overlooked. There’s a blur in your vision, likely caused by the tears building up along your waterline. The tears threaten to fall, and they do, painting your face in a way that makes Yeonjun’s heart pump blood faster than what he would consider normal.

You want to answer him; better yet, you know you should. But between the ringing in your ears and the fact that his hand is around your neck as he drives his cock into your pussy, it’s harder than usual to concentrate. Not to mention there are two other men in the room, Hyunjin, and Wooyoung; their presence is almost suffocating as they laugh and poke at you, teasing you beyond what you’ve experienced before. Nevertheless, none of that matters to Choi Yeonjun. He couldn’t care less about your inability to speak due to your dumb little brain—when he asks you a question, he expects an answer.

“C’mon,” His hand travels from your neck to your jaw, gripping at it. “I know there’s something in that pretty little head of yours. Or am I fucking you dumb already?”

You’re only able to let out a squeak as he moves your head from side to side. He slows down his thrusts until he reaches a halt and pouts down at you. There are no words spoken by him, nor from Hyunjin or Wooyoung, and their silence speaks volumes, running a chill up your spin. Your eyes plead with him, with anyone who will pay attention; saying all the things you couldn’t vocally, yet your prayers go unheard and overlooked. Then, there’s scattered conversation through the ringing in your ears; they're not talking to you, more so about you, secretive as they plot their next move.

In Yeonjun’s mind, he’s meant to break you. He’s meant to be grabbing you by the neck—or your hair—and folding you up, fucking you till his cum leaks out of your pores (if possible, he’d find a way). Not to mention, his cock wants nothing more than to be buried inside of you, and it is; twitching and pulsing, begging for Yeonjun to let up and start moving again. Now, if he were alone, he’d do all the things he’d dreamt about doing to you—the larger part of them being unspeakable, surprisingly a bit too shy to mention his fantasies to the larger group.

For Wooyoung, he’s all about teasing you; rolling his fingers over your nipples, absentmindedly playing and tugging at them as his gaze flickers to and from the place where Yeonjun’s cock disappears and your eyes, as your head is nestled in his lap. He finds himself constantly licking his lips, dazing in and out of the conversation; mind filled with his fantasies of bending you over and fucking into you agonizingly slow.

The youngest of the three is just as mischievous as the former two. Hyunjin is attentive; a lot of the time it seems as if he doesn’t know what’s going on, but he does. He holds a vibrator to your clit, pressing down firmly as he continues the talk with the other two. While he is attentive, Hyunjin is, by nature, a daydreamer. Unable to shake the thoughts in his head that concern making you cum over and over again. He’s a bit disappointed though; Yeonjun isn’t fulfilling his responsibilities and making a mess of you like promised.

Of course, you, in all of your fucked out glory would beg to differ; but that's not up to you. Four days ago, you agreed to the three of them that you would allow them to use you—it’s as simple as that. All you have to do is lay there, as pretty as usual, and follow the orders given to you. Wooyoung’s hands come from your nipples to cup at your face, smiling as he looks down at you. His hands brush against Yeonjun’s, which seemingly brings all three of them back to the current.

Wooyoung wipes away the tears in your eyes, and for the first time in a while, your vision is clear. You peer up with a pout, mustering up all your strength to croak out a plea. “Ruin me.”

There’s a stillness in the air; it’s too calm and makes your stomach turn as it’s soon ushered away by a thick cloud of lust. Yeonjun slides his cock out of you, with a wince, not wanting to leave the warm velvet of your walls.

“What do you think we plan to do, baby?” Hyunjin asks. He removes the vibrator from your clit, and it’s like you can finally breathe and stop clenching.

Yeonjun grabs your hand, pulling you off of Wooyoung and pushing you onto your stomach. A smack is swatted down onto your ass and you know you’re supposed to get into position: face down with your ass up.

There’s shuffling in the background and you can’t help but tense up a bit as you brace for whatever is to come. Then there’s the coolness of lube being poured onto your asshole. Brief laughing in the background as you shudder and clench around nothing. Two slender fingers came to play with the liquid, massaging around your hole before dipping into you, slowly. You cry out a bit, moaning at the stretch but it’s not unfamiliar to you.

The fingers leave you, and you've been pulled up again, this time by your hair. Wooyoung, who is notably all smiles, quickly gives you a peck on the lips before sliding beneath you. Despite being a bit dizzy, you can’t contain your excitement. Compared to the others, Wooyoung’s cock has a natural curve—a lot of penises do, it’s normal. He’s a bit smaller than Yeonjun and Hyunjin in both height and penis size, but he makes up for it with the curve of his cock. Whenever he slides into you, he immediately hits that spot; which causes your knees to go weak every time.

You’re carefully set in place as Hyunjin’s hand comes around Wooyoung’s cock, carefully sliding it inside your cunt. Hyunjin stays behind you, thumb resting inside of your asshole as Yeonjun steps over Wooyoung and in front of you.

“I really don’t want to see your balls right now.” Wooyoung mentions.

“Shut up. This isn’t about you,” Yeonjun snaps back. “Now, open your mouth for me, baby.”

Yeonjun’s focus is back on you, his thumb playing with your bottom lip. You follow your orders, mouth open with your tongue slipping out just a bit. Yeonjun slips into your mouth at the same time Hyunjin slips his cock into your ass. All three of them stay still inside of you, not moving the slightest inch.

Hyunjin gives that first thrust. It’s slow but he inches deeper and deeper into you. Wooyoung follows suit, slow and shallow thrusts into you from below. Followed by Yeonjun, although he isn’t as nice as the others—hitting the back of your throat in an instant before pulling out completely and sliding back into your mouth. The three increase the speed of their thrusts by the second, pulling at you in every which way.

“Such a good fucking slut for us,” Yeonjun grins. “Letting us use all of your holes, so fucking good.”

Hyunjin grabs your hair into a makeshift ponytail, pulling you back so he can deliver harsh thrusts into you. You cry out a bit, wincing at the stretch of his cock inside of you, a lot deeper inside of you this time; but still not completely buried inside. Wooyoung’s hands come up to your thighs, rubbing them to soothe away any pain or discomfort that may come along.

Yeonjun moves closer, holding onto your face at the same time that Hyunjin pulls your head back, firmly holding you in place. He thrusts his cock fully into your mouth, halting the moment your nose brushes against him. In addition to the tip of Yeonjun’s cock hitting the back of your throat, causing the heat to rise within your face and your head to become all fuzzy—or rather dizzy, spinning from the lack of air—you also have to deal with the impact of Wooyoung and Hyunjin’s thrusts. They’re timed perfectly and alternating: when Hyunjin pulls out, Wooyoung thrusts in and back and forth.

Yeonjun draws your attention back to him when he completely pulls out of your mouth, allowing you to catch your breath. He slaps his cock against your lips, groaning at the sound. He inches his cock back into your mouth, slowly increasing his speed with each thrust. Moving his hand and pinching your nose as he swiftly fucks into your throat, and it’s such a pretty sight. Eyes roll to the back of your head with your eyelids fluttering as you try to concentrate on something other than the minimal amount of air you’re receiving. Spit drooling out of your mouth and onto Wooyoung’s abdomen, but he doesn’t mind.

What felt like minutes, but in reality was only seconds, roll by before Yeonjun lets go of your nose, completely shuddering as you choke around him in an attempt to breathe through your nose. He completely pulls out of you, caressing your lips and cheek before stepping off to the side. Cock in hand, stroking himself as he watches Hyunjin and Wooyoung take their time with you.

Hyunjin let’s go on your hair and you allow yourself to fall on top of Wooyoung, resting your head in the crook of his neck. Wooyoung wraps his arms around you, holding you close as he thrusts up into you. Your whines are muffled against his skin. Every thrust made in or out of you causes you to clench and shake around them.

“C’mon, you can take it can’t you?” Hyunjin asks, granting you a slap on the ass.

The more you clench and squirm around you can’t tell if you’re trying to pull away from them or receive more of them—ultimately bringing in the sting of overstimulation despite not having cum yet. But you’re so close and that’s why it hurts. The feeling of two thick cocks inside of you and the thought that they too, could probably feel each other as they fuck into you gets you going.

Wooyoung bites onto your shoulder, his hold getting tighter onto you as he becomes a bit sloppy with his thrusts. He prays that he won’t cum too quickly but your pussy is so warm, all the odds are seemingly against him. Not only is it warm and gripping around his cock like a glove, but you’re so fucking wet—although a lot of that is due to lube and at least four loads dumped in you from earlier in the day. Suddenly, Wooyoung remembers the image of your cunt, fucked out and leaking from his release. The thought sends him into overdrive, and his thrusts get faster then stop completely—warm spurts of cum flooding within you.

“Sorry. Oh, fuck,” He’s timid, embarrassed as he’s apologizing for blowing his load so quickly, but he’s back to fucking up into you in no time, this time with very slow thrusts.

“Hah. You sound like Hyunjin.” Yeonjun teases, still stroking his cock.

“Hey,” Hyunjin pouts.

Hyunjin’s thrusts inside you become slower and slower until he completely pulls out of you. You let out a deep sigh, fully relaxing into Wooyoung. The silence and stillness within the room is brief before there’s another slap at your ass. You clench, unable to let up, instead choosing to bounce on Wooyoung’s cock. He grits his teeth together as you ride him, unable to fully silence the volume of his moans.

You sit up fully, planting your feet on the bed and your hands against his chest. His hands rest at your thighs as he looks at you through his eyelashes. For the most part, though, his eyes stay trained on his cock; coated in cum and disappearing inside of you. Fully unable to stop his cock from twitching and leaking a bit more of his cum at his thoughts.

“Please, just wanna cum,” You whine.

As if on cue, Hyunjin comes behind you again, this time followed by a familiar buzzing noise. His left hand is placed flat against your stomach to hold you in place as his right holds the vibrator to your clit. The pulsing catches you off guard a bit and you collapse, completely sitting on Wooyoung’s cock, relishing in the stretch. You grind down onto Wooyoung, unable to contain yourself as drool and broken moans leak from your mouth.

You shut your eyes tightly as you're thrown into your climax. You wouldn’t be able to tell what happened within the next three minutes because when you’re back on earth and slightly more level-headed, you’re pulled into a completely new position. Wooyoung and Yeonjun hold your legs open as Hyunjin kneels between them. The two older men each hold one vibrator, carefully placed on your nipples at the second to the lowest speed. Each time you try to move away, they follow you with the vibrators, making sure to keep them in place.

Hyunjin’s fingers play with your cunt. His thumb strokes up and down your cunt, occasionally dipping into your folds to spread your wetness around. Hyunjin will always take his time with you, seeking to build you up to the feeling of him before he gives you anything. He replaces his thumb with his index and middle finger, slowly poking into you.

On the other side of things, Yeonjun and Wooyoung look at each other, somehow forming some non-verbal agreement. Or maybe they are speaking and you just can’t hear them over the sound of your heart beating out of your chest. They both grab one of your hands, placing them on their cocks.

“If you don’t make us cum, Hyunjin won’t let you cum.” Wooyoung whispers in your ear.

“And it better be fucking good,” Yeonjun adds.

You gulp, unsure if you’re even able to stroke two cocks at the same time. But you try your damnedest, maintaining your rhythm even as Hyunjin drills his fingers into your cunt. Yeonjun ends up holding onto your hand while he fucks his length into it, while Wooyoung steadily guides your hand alongside his cock.

You don’t notice it immediately, but tears fall from your eyes. Soft pleas fall from your lips, begging Hyunjin to stop his teasing and give you his dick. He smiles, granting your wishes. His lips are on yours as he eases his cock into your cunt. Out of the three, Hyunjin undoubtedly has the biggest cock. This one time he made you cum simply by the stretch alone. He doesn’t help you brace for it like he usually does though, just using your pussy as he pleases; and he prefers to dump his cum in it.

He’s been waiting for this moment—the grip of your tight cunt snug around his cock—pussy crying out for more of him. He’s addicted to the feeling of you, all three of them are. The fact that they get to see and use you in ways that others could only dream of. Knowing that you trust them enough for them to do whatever it is that they please with you.

There isn’t much talking at the moment. Nothing but soft pants and full, unadulterated moans mingling around. The wet, slick, and sticky sounds of skin slapping skin accompany your voices. Each of you lost within your head, nearing your climaxes in complete and utter fucked out bliss.

Hyunjin is the first to cum this time. His hands grip at your sides as he slams into your cunt. He’s rough about it, in absolute need to fuck his cum into you. He can’t do anything other than fuck himself into you, only mustering up enough strength to grab one of the now-forgotten about vibrators from the side and cranking the speed up as he sets it onto your clit. The vibrator is more than enough to send you into your next orgasm, milking Hyunjin’s cock for more of his cum.

It’s embarrassing. Even though you're fucked out, lust-clouded mind, you still get embarrassed about your moans and the compromising positions you end up in when you’re getting fucked like this. But there’s a large part of you that is too blissed out to give a fuck. If this is heaven, you’d want to experience it every single night.

Wooyoung is the next to cum, closely followed by Yeonjun. Both of them obnoxious in their efforts, fucking into your fists as if it were your cunt—to which they’d much rather be inside of. There’s cum dripping all over your hands and forearms, even spilling out onto the sheets. Hyunjin pulls out, wanting to add to the boy's art piece; spilling the last of his cum onto your abdomen.

There’s silence. Perhaps you’re all off in your little worlds contemplating on what to do next. Absentmindedly rubbing and kissing against each other’s skin. It feels like the four of you were laying there for eternity until the silence was broken by a knock against the door. There was minimum haste to get up and get it, Hyunjin choosing to shout for them to come in.

“I can’t believe you guys fucked them without me,” From behind the door enters Changbin with a slight pout, arms crossed in disappointment. You can feel your pussy practically jump in excitement at the thought of him joining in on the fun.

“You said you were busy. Plus, there’s always next time.” Yeonjun smirks.

“Unless,” Wooyoung starts, looking towards you. “How about another round?”

Four sets of eyes descend upon yours, taking you in completely. Their stares are intimidating, eyes clouded with lust and wonder as they await your answer. The question is answered as you spread your legs, placing your hand between them and onto your clit. Changbin, of course, takes this as his invitation to join; immediately stripping himself of his shirt and closing the door behind him.

“Clearly they didn’t wear you out enough, baby.” Changbin smiles. Oh, aren’t you in for a wonderful ride.

💌 as per usual, i hate coming up with titles. surprise changbin at the end because of this <3. perhaps there will be a part two (probably not but who knows ??). pls let me know your thoughts on this <3 i think it was pretty fun to write despite it beating my ass a little bit :(

© PLANETDREAM 2022

[imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl]

Love On-Set (Pt. 05 of 10)

Pairing: Dacre Montgomery X Reader

Word count: 2.9K

Summary: You knew acting on Stranger Things season 3 would be a challenge, and you also knew, from the start, you'd have to work closely with Dacre Montgomery. But is wasn't a big deal for you, since this is your job and you're determined to act professionally. You had it all figured out, or so you thought, until the moment you were out face to face with Dacre. Then, this job became a lot harder than it was supposed to be, since you can't seem to focus whenever you're around Dacre. And you'll have to be around him a lot until the end of production.

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{Dacre Montgomery Masterlist}

{Stranger Things Masterlist}

×

All The Right Signs

“Gaten, get it together! It's fake raining!” Finn yells as Gaten messes up the scene for the fourth time. Everyone just laughs as you brace yourself.

“Five minutes everyone!” James shouts and you follow the kids as they run out of the rain as the water is turned off.

Today, you're glad the scene is outside, with all the main actors. It's always fun, and you need to keep your mind away from what will happen tomorrow. You thought the kissing scene was too far away, but now it's just around the corner. And you didn't do as James said. Every time Dacre showed up to work on that, you'd just sit, watch something and talk. And you always have fun together. The director never asked about the video though, so you just decided to let it go.

But now, it's tomorrow. And you're trying hard not to think about it until it's inevitable.

“Are you cold?” Dacre comes to stand before you, messing up your train of thought.

“A little, yeah.” You answer, removing some hair from your face.

“Well...” He steps closer, his hands rubbing your arms. You immediately feel warmer, but you don't think it's because of the gesture. “If Gaten manages to say his line without bursting into laughter we'll get out of the cold very soon.”

You can't help but blush, staring into his blue eyes. “He is–”

A camera flashing gets your attention, and both you and Dacre look at the source. Millie tries to hide her phone as if the bright light didn't startle you.

“I can't wait for tomorrow.” Natalia comments.

Unfortunately, they will have to be here, because the kissing scene isn't the only one scheduled. You still don't know if it's good or bad. Probably bad.

“Alright, let's get it done.” As James speaks, the water is turned back on and it starts raining again.

“Let's go.” You say in a low voice, accompanying Dacre back to your positions.

It takes another four attempts for Gaten to finally say his line without messing up, and the rest of you are free to finish the take. Afterward, before you can run to your dressing room to shower and change out of the soaking clothes, the guys decide to make some silly pictures with everyone soaking wet. In the middle of the commotion to strike a pose, Dacre finds he's way to stand next to you, an arm either on your shoulders or around your waist. You try not to give it much thought, hoping Millie's phone camera won't get your blushing cheeks.

When it's all done, you take a warm shower before heading to the van and an hour later you're at your hotel room. But the day isn't over yet. The guys are coming here to finally start working on the Battle of Starcourt scenes. But you still have some time before they show up, so you make yourself comfortable on the couch, a blanket around your shoulders as you watch Jaws since you're in the mood for a classic movie.

A knock on the door startles you a little, and you notice you were too immersed in the movie. Dragging the blanket with you, you walk over there after checking your phone. There's still an hour until they come and you didn't order anything. But you unlock it and swing it open, biting your lip when you see Dacre. “Hey.”

“Hi.” He furrows his eyebrows when he looks down at you. “I absolutely love your dress.”

“Really? It's the last fashion in my living room fashion week.” Giggling, you step aside, closing the door shut when Dacre comes in. “You're early. Nobody got here yet.“

“Yeah, I know.”

Raising an eyebrow, you shrug your shoulders. It's not like you would send him away. “I'm watching Jaws. So we can either watch it or put on something else.” Making your way back to the couch, you watch as he does the same, settling down beside you. “You want the blanket?” You decide to ask, just to be polite.

“Sure.”

That you weren't expecting. It's not cold. Well, not that cold. You just took the blanket to feel more comfortable since you're wearing shorts and a light blouse. “Ok.“ You mumble as you take the blanket from around your shoulders, fixing it on both you and Dacre.

Then you focus on the movie. Or you try to focus the best you can. Why is Dacre here? Millie's voice comes back to your head, her lastest advise making you bounce your leg nervously. She told you Dacre is giving all the signs he's into you. And you should do the same, or else he'll get the idea you're not interested and step back. Natalia assured it'll happen because Dacre is a gentleman, always have been, and he won't keep pushing you into something you don't want.

Taking a deep breath, you think about your options. You feel how Dacre's arm is touching yours, and you have an idea. Feeling the butterflies in your stomach going insane, you lean closer to Dacre. “Can I?” You ask, laying your head on his shoulder.

“Sure.” He answers, and after a few seconds of the most uncomfortable silence you've even been through, Dacre moves, putting his arm around your shoulders, what makes you snuggle closer to him, your head resting partly on his chest and neck. Your whole body is frozen for a moment, wondering what this is. Then he moves again, his arm sliding down to embrace your waist, and you decide to just end the small distance that was between your bodies, completely leaning on him. “Is this ok?”

“Yeah.” You nod, eyes tightly shut as your cheeks start burning. “The shark is attacking.” Trying to ease the tension, you gesture at the TV.

“It is,” Dacre mumbles, and you feel his chest vibrating as he speaks.

As the minutes pass by, you feel more comfortable. And it feels good to finally allow yourself to do this. It's something so simple, so silly, but still, it feels right. You've been dying to do this and you didn't even know.

Unfortunately, the hour passes by, the knocks and the chattering announcing that your time alone with Dacre is over. Sighing, you leave the blanket behind and go open the door, hoping nobody will notice that Dacre was here already.

•

“Ok, ok. Positions...” Joe says after the coffee table and couch were pushed aside, leaving a free space in the middle of the room. You stand beside Millie, script in hand as you wait to find out what scene they'll start with. “You there. You can be... There.”

“Why do I have the feeling we interrupted something,” Natalia whispers as she walks by, tilting her head at Dacre, who's discussing something in the script with Sadie.

“Dacre just came to...” To do what? Did he even come to do something specifically? “He came a little earlier.”

“I didn't know you could get this red,” Millie exclaims, staring at you. “Oh, my God, I'm so happy I'll get to see the kissing scene.”

The kissing scene. Nobody in the freaking universe will let you forget it. As if you needed them to remind you that Dacre's lips will be on yours by tomorrow night. “I want to get it done on one take, so don't screw it.”

“You should ask us to ruin it as much as we can so you'll get to kiss him more times.” Natalia sing songs and you Millie laughs, nodding.

“It won't be Dacre and I. It'll be Billy and Amy. It's a scene, it's our job.” You don't know what gets to you, the words just roll out. And they're all true. It won't be a real kiss. It's not like you don't want to do it. You want to kiss Dacre, and this is making you nervous, but it just won't be real. “Let's just focus here, ok?”

The next hours are tiring. They were right to do this because the Battle of Starcourt will be chaos, and it'll be a lot better if you kinda know the dynamics before having to actually shoot it. But you're distracted, forgetting your lines so many times you have to just keep the scrip in hand and read it. You're thankful for the kids being so crazy because they make you laugh and forget your anxiety for a while.

It's past midnight then they leave, and as you're saying your goodbyes at the door, you notice Dacre falling behind. When he's by the door, the others are already disappearing down the hall.

“Guess I'll see you tomorrow.” You mutter, looking down at your feet. If it wasn't for a meeting James called with the whole cast in the morning, you'd have the whole day to deal with before going to the set. It's better this way though, you think.

“Yeah. I'd be down for another gym date but I have this job that won't let me.”

Giggling, you bite your lip. “You think it'll be about changes in the script?”

“I'm sure it will,” Dacre mumbles, giving a look at the hall. When you follow his gaze, you see three blurs in the shape of heads, vanishing into the corner. “We're being watched.” He lowers his voice as if you were in great danger.

“Hope it's not the Demogorgon. I'd hate to save your ass. Again.” When you look back at him, you find his blue eyes already set on you. It makes you sigh, wondering why your legs won't work, and make you step back, returning to the normal distance you should put between you and someone else. “I'll get some sleep... Rough day tomorrow.”

“I agree.” Another glance at the hall, but you don't have time to check if anyone's there this time. Dacre leans closer and places a kiss on your cheek, as he usually does. Only this time is different. It lingers, for far too long, and at the same time, it ends too soon. And you're sure you felt the corner of his lips on yours. “Good night, (Y/N).”

“Good night.” Whispering, you stand by the door as he makes his way to the elevators, giving one last look back before disappearing in the corner.

• • •

Your hands are shaking a little, and you blame it on the cold wind. But the wind isn't that cold. Is it?

You're already in your position, at Hawkins Community Pool's parking lot, next to this random car and your stylist is finishing with your hair and giving the final touches on your make-up. No lipstick. You can't imagine why.

On your left, you see many pairs of eyes set on you. After this scene, James wants to shot the sequence, when the kids find a Demodog in the pool, so everyone is here. But you can't think about that now, you have to focus. Amy needs to come to life today, and you need to act like a professional. You knew acting in Stranger Things would be huge, and difficult, but you'd never guess it would be this hard.

You take the deepest breath you can when you see Dacre coming your way. Mullets were an atrocity to humankind, you think, but damn, he did make it look good. How is it even possible? He shouldn't be allowed to do that.

“Hey. You–”

“Everyone ready?” James' thunder voice cuts him off, and you have no idea if that's good or bad. No time to figure out. “Clean the set, let's do this. Dacre, (Y/N), are you ready?”

Nodding, you force your mind to remember the lines. You're Amy now... Which sucks because by now, Amy is already in love with Billy. Nothing will help you, you just need to get it done, give the audience the show they want.

“Great. Alright then... Ready and... Action!”

You're not ready for that, but you move anyways.

“I can't believe you took almost an hour to get here, Hargrove!” Amy yells, walking fast to end the small distance between her and Billy. “There's a freaking Demodog in the pool!”

“It's dead. So why the hurry?” Dacre keeps the smug smirk, the one that makes you want to slap Billy. Just a little bit. “Chill.”

“Don't tell me to chill. Can't you miss one single date? Not even when there's an interdimensional monster involved?” You punch Dacre hard on the chest, well not so hard, but he does give a tiny step back. This is Amy's jealously attack, and you make sure to make her look frustrated because despite the emotions overflowing, she knows she shouldn't be doing this.

“Why the hell you always think I'm with some girl?”

“Because that's where you always are.” Jumping to conclusions. That's the way Amy found to keep her heart away from Billy. Didn't work though. “You know what, it doesn't matter. We have a bigger fish to fry.”

When you turn around to leave, Dacre gets his cue, grabbing your arm and forcing you to stop and stumble back. “The damn thing is dead, it can wait.”

“Let go.” Amy pleads, stepping backwards as Billy comes closer. That's the moment where she gives up trying. This thing with Billy has been going on for a while now, and, as in real life, there's just this point where you stop fighting it. “Seriously, I'm tired of this shit so let's just–”

“I know you're jealous.” He mutters, just when your back hits the car. James loves to have you trapped like that. “Just need to figure out why.”

“I've said it once, and I'll say it again.” It's hard to follow the script, it's hard to keep breathing normally. It's so damn hard to keep eye contact with Dacre right now. “I won't be one of your flings so back the hell down.”

It comes out too low, and you wait for James to stop the scene. And you want him too. You can't do this. You can't stop looking at Dacre's lips, you can't control the butterflies in your stomach. This is just a goddman scene, why can't you get it together?

“Who said I want you to be a fling?”

That's it. It's happening. Dacre leans closer, so close that you have no choice but to close your eyes. He's saying something else, but you don't hear it. Your hands find their way to his chest, grabbing his jacket as if to steady yourself, to get a grip of reality. When his lips brush on yours, Amy is gone and you break character, taking a deep breath before pulling him closer, eager to end the small distance and finally–.

A loud noise, an explosion, makes both of you jump. One of the cameras near you come crashing down and if it wasn't for Dacre pulling you away, it would hit you. The whole thing moves like a domino effect, knocking a few more cameras with it. You barely hear James's voice, stepping further back, making sure you're far enough. The rest of the cast abruptly stand up from their chairs, worried.

“Everyone back off!” James shouts.

“Are you ok?” Dacre asks and you simply nod, a hand on your heart.

James dismisses everyone while he and his assistants check what happened. You silently walk beside Dacre until you reach the rest of the crew, looking down and trying not to think about the kiss. Or the almost kiss.

“What the hell happened?” Joe asks, and everyone starts talking at the same time.

There isn't much to talk about. Four of the five cameras are wrecked, and the director is pissed. But still, you're too far away, your mind stuck in the phantom of the kiss you craved for so desperately. Dacre stands by your side, but you can't look at him right now. So you engage in the conversation, ignoring Millie's and Natalia's stares, hoping nobody will notice your blushing cheeks.

An hour later, the big news arrive. Well, they're big news fort he cast, not for James. After analyzing the damage, James will have to suspend the shooting for five days. Which means you'll have five days off. Everyone starts making plans, and the ride back to the hotel is filled with happy chattering about who will go where. But you already know what you'll do. You'll fly home and use these days to rest. And think.

“Hey.” Dacre gets your attention, following out of the van when you reach the hotel. “What are your plans?”

“Uhm... I'm flying home.” Shrugging your shoulders, you keep his pace through the main hall.

“Oh, you live in LA, right?” Giving him a quick glance, you nod. “I'm living there too, I don't know if I told you.”

This lights up a spark in your heart, and suddenly, you're not so excited to stay away anymore. “No, you haven't.”

“We can book our flights together... If that's ok.”

His hesitation gets you by surprise, but then you notice how distant you've been acting since the kiss. Damn, he might be thinking you didn't like it or something. That he made you uncomfortable. That's exactly what you don't want him to think. “It is. When do you wanna leave?”

“Tomorrow morning?”

“That's fine by me.” You finally decide to look at him, and you immediately regret avoiding his eyes. Being nervous is... Normal. Maybe. But his eyes give you the reassurance you need. “I'll stop by your room in an hour so we can buy the tickets.”

“I'll be waiting.” His lips break into a smile, and you can't help but bite your lip and smile too.

“I'll be there.” You say as the doors open on his floor. Dacre mutters a goodbye, and right before the door closes again, you see when he winks at you.

×

@baker151910 @shinydixon @dreamin-of-dacre @hanoi15 @lickmymelanin @foccus @multific @uncookspaget @kellysimagines @peakascum

[delusion-of-negation]

top 10 (ish) ridiculous or annoying FAQs:

(click at your own discretion)

1) "kids today rely on others to do everything"

ah yes, damn those participation trophies! if it wasn't for them my hands wouldn't be fucked, and I wouldn't need people to write for me. but seriously, stop reading boomer comics, and go outside to meet some actual young people.

2) "sus that a non-american says mom"

yeah, because it's clearly the superior version, and I'm not too patriotic to concede a defeat.

3) "sweaty, the victims of abuse by catholics are real people, stop appropriating their pain just because you want to hate catholics; plus teachers abuse people just as often anyway"

so firstly, I don't hate anybody. and secondly, regarding the fact that victims really do exist, [insert "of course I know him, he's me" meme here]; although I don't often talk much about the abuse I went through or what my religious beliefs are. but, more importantly, statements like "survivors are people" can be phrased like "some people are survivors", and when you're unable to act according to the latter (like when you don't even consider that somebody might be one) then you display a failure to recognise the former - you're projecting; a survivor can't be appropriating their own pain, but you can be appropriating it to silence one. and thirdly, teachers do abuse - the problem isn't and has never been purely religion, rather that abuse is often done by somebody in a position of trust, power, and familiarity; and that the lack of a global minimum enables totally legal abuse on top of the illegal stuff. people with access and respect have more opportunity to abuse than those without, and that goes for teachers too. but, once again, you can be appropriating the pain of survivors to deflect and silence people. please remember this before you say that shit.

4) "get help/therapy"

way ahead of you - years ahead of you. but it's not magic - people who say this often act as if you'll start behaving differently overnight. not only are some things simply beyond the ability of talking therapy to completely rectify, it also takes time and has to be selective. you've got to pick your priorities, and that's definitely not whatever ship or joke you're mad at me about today. therapy is a slow, arduous process that can't guarantee results - it isn't "anti-recovery" to recognise that, it's honesty. while I've been in therapy for a long time, it is not necessarily going to change whatever you don't like about me - whether that's because it can't, because my focus now is on more important or urgent things, or because I don't want to change that.

5a) "tell your family you ship incest, see how that goes; normal people find it disgusting"

actually, some know, and they're fine with it. in fact, one prefers sibling pairings in fiction to all other dynamics because, to paraphrase, "it's a deeper level of messed up co-dependence". so unfortunately for you, my remaining family (by which I mean those not dead or cut out of my life after abuse and so forth) actually are able to distinguish between fiction and reality. plus, my reasoning for caring if they find it gross or not pertains only to recommending books and such - their opinions do not dictate my tastes.

5b) "don't sexualise/appropriate incestuous abuse" and "I bet you enjoyed being raped" and other attempts to upset me over 5a

firstly, as I've already said here, survivors can't be appropriating ourselves. in addition, you're not owed people's history or trauma - it's not okay to require people's personal information, or else you'll send anon hate and accusations of appropriation. secondly, I'm not sexualising our abuse (not just because I write horror, and so a lot of my writing is intended to be creepy, not sexy); these stories aren't about us, they're not us at all. entire dynamics/people (fictional or otherwise) aren't all going to be applicable to us or identical to us, just because they have something in common with us; they're not us and they're not accountable to us. thirdly, the fact that people send this stuff (attempting to trigger people's trauma over ships) is so much more worrying to me than somebody making our communal imaginary friends kiss. you're trying to hurt people. and finally, to the "I bet you enjoyed it" crowd (if you're at all serious): do you think you'd enjoy being in a real zombie apocalypse, alone, afraid, and really at risk of being eaten alive? a fictional scenario does not feel remotely the same as a real one. this isn't rocket science - things that look like you aren't you; fiction isn't reality; don't send anon hate. (edit: comparable "just leave me alone, I'm not hurting anyone" sentiments for yandere stuff, and anything else you decide I'm naughty for.)

6) "you'll be sent off to do manual labour once your communist revolution happens"

while I don't know why people think that I'm a communist, a dictatorial regime probably isn't going to want me to do manual labour. they're more likely to just shoot me; I'm useless and a liability. call me crazy, but something tells me that "ah yes, we shall give ze deranged cripple ze power tools" isn't the communist position.

7a) "they/them can't be singular pronouns"

yes they can, and they're used as such in both shakespeare and the bible. but you don't have to say this - I'm also okay with he/him, so you could've just used those and chilled out. also, do I look like somebody who views the rules of grammar as fully immutable and imperative?

7b) "enbies/aros/pan/etc aren't valid"

do you really think that you're going to change any hearts or minds by putting that in my ask box or under my funny maymays? chill out, it's not worth the effort - you could be planning a party (in minecraft) and having fun instead. it isn't worth my time to rant at everybody who's saying something isn't valid, updating how I'm explaining it as my opinions grow and general discourse around it evolves; I'm just who I am, somebody else is who they are - why bicker in presumptuous ways about if that's enough? it ultimately is valid, in my opinion, but that isn't an invitation to keep demanding that I debate. (edit: old posts of mine probably don't phrase things incredibly, on this or anything... I tried.)

8) "what are your politics?"

my politics are informed first and foremost by the knowledge that I'm not cut out to be some kind of leader - I don't want to be the guy who tells everyone else what to do, I just offer what seem to me like valid criticisms of how we are doing things now, and general pointers on the values and ethics that I would prefer to move towards. things like individual freedom, taking the most pacifist route where possible, trying not to give excessive power to small groups of people (governments or corporations), helping those in need even when they're not palatable, and letting me suck loads of dicks. but please refrain from decreeing me something - there's not enough information in what I said, so you'll just be filling in the blanks with assumptions. (edit: workplace democracy seems cool to me; benefits are good; fair fines and taxes; and the "sperm makes you loopy" saga: 1, 2, 3, and 4.)

9) "you're a narcissist"

no, I don't meet the diagnostic criteria. joking on the internet that you're hot doesn't make a person a narcissist. the fact that I've chosen to keep my actual self-esteem issues to myself is not proof that they don't exist - you're just not entitled to that information about me. but it's also not narcissism to really like how you look. (edit: don't throw labels around carelessly too.)

10a) "kin list?"

the fabric of the universe, a zombie, dionysus, maned wolf/arctic fox hybrid, a comedian, big gay, big rock, ambiguously partial insincerity. (edit: kin list may or may not be incomplete.)

10b) "kin isn't valid/that's just being insane"

haven't we established that I'm deranged, and that sending stuff like this on anon is simply a waste of your precious time? besides, I do not care if it's invalid or insane - it's fun, I'm happy. (edit: see 7b for my opinion on sending me yet another ask with "that's invalid" in it; I'm not in the mood to discuss the nature of validity.)

bonus: "it gets better" and "trigger list?"

as I've said before, things just don't always get better for everyone - sometimes things can't be cured or even treated, sometimes they kill you; in some cases it could get better if not for a blockade or lack of time. the world is messy. it needs to be more normalised to reassure or comfort people without relying on saying that their issue will get better or be cured. it does suck to be this ill, but it also sucks to be made out to be a lazy pessimist, just because I have the audacity to not play along. and as for the trigger list, I don't like providing people with an easily accessed list of ways to hurt my feelings or harm me - upsetting me is supposed to be challenging, and thus rewarding. if you want a cheat sheet then you're out of luck, I'm afraid.

bonus #2: "FAQ stands for frequently asked questions, it doesn't need that s at the end!"

yeah, I know, I just enjoy chaos and disarray.

bonus #3 (edit): "what are your disabilities and how exactly are they incurable and/or deadly?"

again, I don't tell the internet everything about me, especially when it poses a risk, especially not as an easily accessible list for you to refer back to whenever you feel inclined to hurt my feelings. that is understandably a sore subject. (edit: that includes physical health issues btw.)

bonus #4 (edit): "so we shouldn't be critical?"

if it wasn't clear from my answer about politics or my post in general, you can have opinions about things, and you can voice that. it's just not realistic to exist at extremes: to think that you alone should dictate what exists in fiction, or to think that people shouldn't be expressing disdain or criticism of any calibur. say how you feel about things, that's fine, but it's also fine if people find that they don't value your input. plus we're all flawed, we can all be hypocritical from time to time, we all get bitchy, and we all make mistakes, or even knowingly fuck things up. that's important to keep in mind, whether we're talking about the one being criticised or the one doing the criticising - poor choices of words, imperfect tone, or contradictory ideas are inevitably going to happen occasionally.

congrats on reaching the end! if you have, at any point, said one of these to me, you owe a hug to your nearest loved one (once it's safe).

edit: might add more links/bonus points in the future when I think of things, but it's late now. (sorry for links where prior notes in the thread have my old url, that may get a tad confusing; also, not all links are my blog or my op, since it is to illustrate points/vibes, not to self-promo.)

[cyborg-franky]

• Day 7: Favourite male character

I have so many opinions so like.. I'll do my top 5 [That haven't been answered like I picked Usopp for fav Straw Hat so I won't include him here]

In no real order..

Law But more importantly preskip Law I like what a smug little shit he was and how he seemed like a devious character who was just kinda around to fuck shit up. This lanky prick of a man in a world of pirates rocks up in jeans and a hoody and is like 'what up' I was pretty hyped when I found out he was sorta based on Edward Low. I liked he was cocky and messed up but always looked like it was seconds away from the best nap of his life. Also appeared to be high as fuck for a good part of preskip. I really fell in love with this sort of character. I mean I still like his angsty post skip self but I feel I'm a little basic for being so into him cus 'moody and serious' hadn't been 'my type'

Franky Again I prefer preskip but thats due to the hair and I am a shallow butthole sometimes. Franky's past is always a really sad one for me and I love how loyal he is. like he'd take a secret to the grave with him. I like his found family dynamics with Tom and co. He's so smart and down to earth but at the same time he's so very.. Franky which offsets it. He was a fun bad guy and an even better straw hat. I also love how he was basically 'I've known this woman like five minutes but sure I'll risk my life for her, she cute' at Robin.

Foxy OK LISTEN I don't wanna bone him like everyone else on this list but I love him. Davy Back Fight episodes are some of my fav because they are comfort episodes whenever I'm super depressed. Foxy is useless and doesn't pose any real danger to anyone, his power is dumb, he's dumb but I find him so funny. Also his crew loves him, everyone on his crew always looks like they are having a blast and living such fun lives. I wanna be part of that crew.

Buggy Following the theme of ridiculous men I love. Buggy, he was a fav bad guy from when I first started watching [which was when it actually came out cus damn bitch, I'm old] and I love that he keeps coming back. IMPEL DOWN would have been such a dull arc if not for him and then his marriage to Mr.3. I love his relationship with Shanks and how it feels almost cannon that they are exes and Buggy just won't let it fucking go. He's a joke but I love him. I always enjoy episodes with him, his power is fucking nuts and like myself he cannonly could be one of the strongest but he is just if CBA was a person.

Corazon I think most people who really, really like Law can't help but really love Corazon. Like he's so beloved for someone who was dead before we even got to meet him, his entire existence is in flashbacks. He's such a great person, also a total dork and a goof which I love. He was very fun to cosplay. A very good person and also part of one of the saddest back stories.

[ducktracy]

185. porky’s hero agency (1937)

release date: december 4th, 1937

series: looney tunes

director: bob clampett

starring: mel blanc (porky, emperor jones), tedd pierce (gorgon, assistant), sara berner (porky’s mom)

the final porky cartoon for 1937, and what a busy year it’s been for him! hard to believe he had an entirely different voice, look, and demeanor just 8 months prior. even then, his character still had much to explore, as we see here—in this cartoon, he’s cast as a child again. curiously, bob clampett is often credited as the one who refined his personality into the one we know today (he did give him his iconic suit and tie), but, like everything else, it was more of a collaborative exploration by all of the directors.

the title card is one of the more interesting title cards in the warner bros. repertoire—it’s a photo of a porky statuette! bob clampett would make several statues during his time at WB and distribute them to his top animators. while the statue in the credits is painted over, you can view an unpainted model here!

here, porky dreams of the wonders of ancient greece, prancing around as the mythological messenger parkykarkus. however, a gorgon has her sights set on turning him into stone, and it requires some quick thinking from porky to weasel his way out of this mess.

bobe cannon animates the expositional sequence, with porky propped up in bed, sucked into a giant book full of greek myths. his mother (offscreen) tells him it’s time to go to sleep, but porky objects, protesting that he was just at the exciting part. cannon’s animation is easy to spot with his trademark buck teeth, yet the gestures he gives porky--finger points, turning the page, etc.--give him a nice dose of youthful energy as he recaps the story, telling tales of gorgons and “great great great” greek heroes.

nevertheless, a disembodied hand turns out the light, dismissing porky’s protests. he heaves a resigned sigh, lamenting how he wishes he could be a great greek hero. 

the cartoon doesn’t make any attempts to keep the dream sequence a surprise--instead, the face of the book’s cover takes up the entire screen, the pillars emblazoned on the front melting to life as we fade into ancient greece. and, as to be expected, our favorite porcine hero proudly stands in front of the building, proudly advertising “HERO FOR HIRE AGENCY -- PORKYKARKUS PROP.”

porkykarkus is a play on parkykarkus (”park your carcass”), a character on eddie cantor’s radio show “the chase & sanborn hour”. truck into porky’s services as he narrates over the specials:

“has anybody any eh-deh-deah-deah-dragons you want seh-seh-sleh-slay-slaye--rubbed out? or maybe ya have some, uh, fair meh-mai-meh-maide--honeys ya want rescued! it’s a peh-pleasure. is your daughter safe? phone eh-peh-porkykarkus at olympia 2222!”

porky’s narration, as always, is fun to listen to, and the physical advertisement has its own charm and appeal, with discounts and deals on certain rescues. not only that, but it’s a damn smart way to save money, having just the narration over the still frame. smart thinking!

conveniently, porky gets a phone call, sparking the tried and true “gear up for a big sprint but merely tinker on over to your destination” gag. as porky answers the phone, filling us in by repeating the hidden dialogue from the other line, we find out it’s the emperor--he wants one hero to go.

chuck jones’ layouts stick out quite strongly throughout this cartoon, especially in the human designs. porky’s statue of mercury is no exception--the bulbous nose and rounded body construction are all surefire trademarks of his work. porky grabs the messenger’s hat and winged shoes from the statue, never once taking a beat to stop as he hobbles along, dressing as he prepares to head out. woodblock sounds simulate the sound of his hooves clopping, but also add an extra jaunty jive to the merry score of “have you got any castles?” in the background, the cartoon’s motif. it would also be a merry melody courtesy of frank tashlin not even a year later.

with that, porky takes off, soaring in the skies like a pro with his winged shoes. if the scene wasn’t appealing enough with the overhead layouts, the animation of porky steadying himself is wonderfully smooth and fun--the cherry on top. he circles the palace where the emperor is located, swooping down to his destination. complete with airplane sound effects, of course.

“howdy, empy!” another bulbous-nosed jones character silences porky from behind his armchair. emperor jones (boy, who could that name reference, i wonder?) speaks in a ridiculously hilarious dialect, completed with a thick accent: “shh! i’m making a fireside chat with my sheeps!” his voice then slips into a rooseveltian draw as he coos “my friends, grecians and customers, this is emperor jones speaking...”

pan to the audience, which consists of a sea of smiling statues. this entire speech sequence is wonderful--not only is his terrible grammar terribly amusing, (”statistics show... what last season at this time was population in greece from 6,000 with 500 with 54 people, with 17 statues.”) but little touches such as one of the audience statues roasting marshmallows and later a hotdog over the fireplace, the emperor making his audience clap by pulling on ropes tied to their arms, and so forth make the entire charade highly amusing with lots of details to look out for. porky standing idly in the background, awkwardly fidgeting as he tries not to intrude is a great little piece of character animation as well.

the emperor gives the skinny, all while chowing down on a hotdog: a gorgon has been turning more and more people into statues, and they need a hero to steal her life-restoring needle in order to turn all of the statues back into humans again. the hero he has in mind is, of course, porky, who bashfully accepts the offer. when the emperor asks those in favor to raise their right hand, he pulls on a lever that causes all of the statues to raise their hands in unison, including a hand on a nearby clock. with a handshake, empy concludes “it’s a deal!”

one of the most impressive pieces of animation in the cartoon (i actually dedicated an entire drawing to it!) is when the emperor sends porky on his way, who waves goodbye as he flies through the air with his winged shoes. just as he tips his hat, he knocks into a pillar, which sends him tumbling upside down, but still airborne. the wings on his shoes form hands as they shake their fists in the glory of the good landing, with porky flashing a cheeky grin to the audience before spiraling lower in the air, regaining his balance, and barreling onward towards a smoldering volcano. the animation is full of life and character--though porky is consistently jolly in the B&W clampett cartoons, the grin towards the camera as he prides himself in his save is a great little touch of personality. slowly but surely, bits of character are now becoming more defined.

a gag that took me just now to recognize it--porky swoops into the heart of the volcano, where we spot the source of the black fumes pouring out the top: the gorgon statue factory. a merry score of “you’ve got something there” serves as some easy listening as we’re treated to a sign gag:

outside of the factory is a human picket fence, comprised of familiar faces: statues of bobe cannon, norm mccabe, john carey, bob clampett himself and chuck jones surround the area. directly outside of the factory is the frozen statue of a salesman with his foot in the door--the joke is not only amusing, but the pose is quite strong and readable, too. though nowhere near the dynamism of frank tashlin’s poses in the mid ‘40s, clampett’s poses in this cartoon are quite defined and exaggerated for the time period. this is especially sharp in the scenes with the emperor.

porky knocks on the door held ajar by the ceramic statue’s foot, holding out an envelope. “telegram for the guh-geh-gee-geh-gee-gor-geh--” a hand snags the envelope out of porky’s grip, causing him to mutter “aww, nuh-neh-nee-nuh-neh-neh-nut--shucks,” a phrase he echoed in clampett’s previous entry, rover’s rival.

we transition to the inside of the factory, where we see the gorgon herself, positioned in front of a camera, awaiting to take “pictures” of her models. tedd pierce voices the gorgon, whose vocal stylings are a parody of tizzie lish, bill comstock’s character on al pearce and his gang. interestingly, the cartoon before this, the woods are full of cuckoos, featured a caricature of lish as well, also voiced by pierce. 

clampett and pierce’s comedic timing is sharp--not nearly as sharp as tashlin’s timing in the woods are full of cuckoos, but abundantly amusing nonetheless. the gorgon asks for a boy--”a sorta young-ish one”--and in comes a decrepit old man who can hardly hold himself up. the gorgon waits for the man to assume his position on the podium where his picture will be taken, singing a pitchy rendition of “am i in love?“, another homage to the characteristics displayed by lish’s character on the radio.

the gorgon snaps her photo, which turns the shaky old man into a stone statue at once, cheekily labeled “ANTIQUE --  $60,000 (P.S.: 000,000)” before he’s yanked off of the podium with a cane. 

“now let’s try a group picture.” you know it’s a ‘30s cartoon if the three stooges come waddling in--they made their caricatured, cartoon debut in the 1934 film the miller’s daughter, notorious for being chuck jones’ first animation credit. as expected, they all beat the tar out of each other while on the podium, rendered immobile only through the power of medusa’s camera. they turn into the three wise monkeys, labeled “3 MONKEYS OF JAPAN -- MADE IN GREECE”. 

norm mccabe’s animation is easy to spot in the next scene with porky, characterized by his signature double eyebrows. porky knocks on a door, parroting a favorite catchphrase from the al pearce show that frequented many a clampett cartoon: “i hope she’s eh-eh-at home, i hope, i hope, i hope, i hope, i hope...”

porky shakes the hand of the assistant, unfortunately a blackface caricature (save for the voice, who is just tedd pierce speaking in a deep, suave voice) as he greets “welcome, stranger. won’t you come in?” before porky has time to answer, he’s yanked through the iron bars of the door and placed neatly in line for the photoshoot, where he peeks through the door to see the action inside.

a pile of men form a pyramid, where the camera turns them into a literal statue of a pyramid, with some slight imperfections. “aw, shucks!” laments the gorgon. “you moved!” she approaches them with her life restoring needle, allowing the men to form into the proper position, maintaining good balance. she gets her “genuine egyptian statue”, quipping “ought to make a handy paperweight!”

the assistant informs porky that he’s next. porky backs up anxiously, echoing a short-lived catchphrase of his from the joe dougherty era: “nuh-neh-no! eh-nn-nee-no! a-a thousand times no!” the decision to make his thoughts visible (his head is slapped onto that of a piggy bank’s) is playful, and also reflects just how big of an influence comics had on bob clampett’s work: comic artists such as milt gross and george lichty have been cited by clampett as inspirations. the george lichty influence is definitely noticeable in rod scribner’s animation under bob clampett, as we’ll discover in the coming years.

in the midst of his panic, porky backs into a statue of "dick a. powello” (dick powell and apollo), causing it to break. but, rather than fuss over the mess, porky uses the opportunity to hatch an idea instead.

in comes strolling porky, concealed by powello’s upper body and a blankett hiding his hooves. the triumphant score of “he was her man” and the gorgon’s smitten woos makes the scene hilarious as is, but the blanket falling off and revealing porky’s pudgy little hooves is the icing on the comedic cake.

porky perches himself on a conveniently placed couch, where the gorgon approaches him. “pardon me, is this seat taken?” she doesn’t wait a wink before snuggling right up to him, a heart symbolizing her affections popping in the air. though clampett would play with typography at times and maintain an overarchingly jovial mood to his cartoons, it’s an odd thing to see him play with comic-like visuals in this manner, such as porky physically envisioning himself as a piggy bank or the heart from the gorgon. i wish he had done it more in this nature!

with the gorgon too close for comfort, porky uses this as an opportunity to grab the gorgon’s life-restoring needle, dangling from her neck and lying against her body. it wouldn’t be a clampett cartoon without sexual innuendos--porky reaches aimlessly around for the needle, prompting the gorgon to let out a shriek, cooing “why, mr. a POWELLo!” 

she smothers the ceramic head in kisses, giving him a nice lipstick finish to boot as she pretends the statue has given her a ring. her ecstasy is hilarious and WONDERFULLY conveyed through strong, rubbery poses worth freeze-framing. picturing porky’s befuddlement is another humor within itself. 

finally, porky’s disguise is revealed when the gorgon literally crushes the statue in an embrace, stone crumbling around him as he desperately slips out of her grip. as the gorgon makes threats to call the cops, reciting the WB favorite catchphrase of “calling all cars! calling all cars!”, porky makes with the needle and jabs it in various statues, warning them “uh-geh-uh-get goin’! i-i-eh-it’s the guh-geh-geh-eh-geh-gorgon!”

as the gorgon chases porky with her camera, he continues to revive a barrage of statues: the antique, the famed discus thrower (who throws himself out of the scene rather than the discus), the man from the end of the trail statue, who exits riding his horse like a merry go round (a nod to friz freleng’s sweet sioux), a woman who marches off with popeye’s forearms--note the bobe cannon statue in the back here--and a mermaid who unzips her fin and makes a run for it. the highlight of the entire montage is when porky approaches two temples (the two of them together labeled “shirley temple”) and injects the needle into them, prompting the temples to use their pillars as legs and run for the hills.

the chase reaches its climax as the gorgon pursues porky with a movie camera, turning the crank ferociously as she runs. her plan works--porky slows down, freezing in mid-air as the gorgon cries “hold it!” thus, the gorgon pins porky to the ground, who tries his hardest to fight back, but ultimately flailing around as she commands him to open his eyes.  

we melt into the present, where we find porky’s mother in place of the gorgon, telling him softly to wake up. he does so, after she pries one of his eyes opens. relieved that it was all a dream, he embraces his mother, prompting a happy end and an iris out.

this cartoon has a soft spot in my heart--it was one of the first LT cartoons i saw on this whole venture. i thought i was the smartest person alive, understanding the three stooges, popeye, and shirley temple references. who knew just how much i had (and still have!) to learn! though even without my sentimental biases, this still stands as a very good cartoon.

as i mentioned previously, the poses in this are full of elasticity and energy, especially in the emperor and the gorgon. porky does a very nice job as well--little pieces of animation such as him fidgeting awkwardly while the emperor rambles on, swinging from side to side as he’s offered the job to be a hero, etc. etc. are full of charm and character. while his personality isn’t the most electric in comparison to characters like bugs and daffy, it’s the little things like these that really make porky stand out. with him, a little subtlety goes a long way, and that’s why he’s one of my favorites. he’s so reserved in comparison to such a wild cast of characters that his timidness actually shines through and sets him apart! (though, on the other hand, he can still have quite the personality, as we’ll discover!)

personally, the only gripes i have with this cartoon is the blackface caricatured assistant (which, in comparison to some cartoons we’ve seen and still have yet to see, is relatively mild, but uncomfortable nonetheless). the jokes, while corny at times, still hit, the animation is full of life and vigor, and the short as a whole has a lot of charm, whimsy, and personality. it has my seal of approval! go check it out!

link!

[techdesigned-arch]

introducing: the sarah cut!      ( a.k.a. the storyline that should have happened if the r*sso’s weren’t cowards )

 hey there! i’ve been writing shuri since infinity came out a little more than two years ago, and in that first year before endgame, my portrayal relied heavily on my own headcanons and predictions about what would happen in the next movie. ...let’s just say that the directors that shall not be named did a 180 and reduced my girl to a mere 30 seconds of screen time, and killed her via a poster. 

i tried for a while to stay canon compliant, but it really killed my muse. all the complicated storylines and dynamics that i’d spent so long working on had died in 3 hours, and it wasn’t until a little while ago that i decided to say fuck it. i fell in love with the story that i’d created, and i wasn’t gonna let canon hold me down. 

so this, my friends, is the sarah cut - basically my salty way of letting you guys know my canon divergencies from when the credits finish on infinity war! it’ll probably be a bit of a ramble, but i’ll write it more cohesively in my bio, which i’ll probably be working on after this is posted. 

note: if you write any of the characters that i talk about, please know that this isn’t set in stone! if you’d like to write a thread that strays / changes things from this storyline, i’d love to do it. this is just to have a solid foundation in my verses.

going to put it under a cut to keep your dash clean!

alright, so. infinity war plays out the same, with shuri working on vision while the rest of the avengers and wakandans try to buy her as much time as possible. however, there are a couple things that happen that we don’t get to see on screen. 

first, shuri’s the one that sets up bucky’s new prosthetic arm before the battle. there’s a scene there where you fully see how much they’ve bonded, and how much he means to her after such a short time. it’s almost as though he’s become another sibling figure to her. 

second, there’s an extra scene with shuri and t’challa, most likely after the arm scene. just the two of them, once everyone else has left to go make their final preparations. a check to make sure she’s okay, and if she’s comfortable with the amount of pressure placed on her. she’s quick to shake him off, the victories with bucky and everett causing her to be more arrogant than usual. there’s a snide remark, and a hug that lasts a little bit too long. hints of worry, thoughts racing back to the waterfall. to vienna. then back to business. 

the biggest switch post infinity war? you guessed it - shuri doesn’t die! the last we see of her, she's almost done separating the mind stone from vision: 87% finished, to be exact. however, one of thanos’ alien dudes comes in, and she and the guards aren’t able to hold him off. with a swing of his massive fist, she’s thrown across the room and knocked unconscious. she wakes up a couple hours after the snap, completely disoriented. the lab’s a mess of shattered glass and the battlefield is quiet. almost eerily quiet. as soon as she tries to rise, okoye enters and tells her what happened. she collapses back on the ground again, coming to terms with the fact that her brother has left her alone again. 

now to endgame. unable to look at the wreckage without thinking of her failures, shuri flees back to the avengers compound with the others. she uses their lab, spending countless sleepless nights trying to wrack her brain for an answer. her brother, bucky, peter, the others - they couldn’t all be gone. her mother leaves her be, though shuri knows what must happen - there must be another ruler to take her brother’s place. she tries to stall as much as she can, taking advantage of the emergency protocol that the council of elders put in place. 

however, her country can only be kept waiting for so long. they notify her that she has 4 days to return home for the next challenge day, or they will see it as a forfeit of the throne. there’s a part of her that wants to give it up - she’d never wanted the crown anyway - though the chance of seeing her brother and father in the ancestral plane is the only thing causing her any hesitation.  

she doesn’t have time to head back to wakanda, though, as the security system shows none other than scott lang at the front door. a man who was all but dead 6 months ago. 

(oh yeah, the skip’s only 6 months. fuck the 5 year gap.) 

she calls her mother at an ungodly hour in wakanda, unable to speak through her tears. only a few words are audible: we can bring him back. with that, the team gets to work on time travel tech. shuri helps tony, and the two simultaneously let out a ‘shit!’ when the simulation comes back successful. she joins bruce to retrieve the time stone, guarded by the ancient one. she tells her about the danger that removing the stone poses to her own reality, and there’s a parallel between the added conversation with t’challa in infinity war. however, in this one, she’s not driven by arrogance. she promises the stone’s safe return, and the ancient one gives the two an endearing smile before giving the stone to them. 

they return to their own reality, and the rest of the movie plays out as it should. thanos attacks, and shuri struggles to fight the horde of aliens before she and the others stand near steve. she takes a breath, mumbling a prayer to bast and the ancestors under her breath. asking her brother for strength. asking her father for guidance. 

then, almost immediately, the portals behind them open. out walks okoye and t’challa. shuri can’t help it, she sprints towards him, throwing her arms around him. a moment of relief, before turning back to thanos and his army. her gauntlets warm up, and the real fight begins. it’s there, in the midst of battle, that she reunites with bucky, peter, and the other heroes. they fight until tony snaps his fingers. he’s gone too quickly for shuri to get them to wakanda. 

she attends the funeral with her family, and return to wakanda, whose people are celebrating the revival. despite the losses, they’ve won, and shuri is once again surrounded by the people she loves, and the country she treasures. 

[unproduciblesmackdown]

currently t posing as hard as ever thanks to also being stuck in [i can't believe i have to create what i want to create] mode... comradeship... ✨🔮🍺⚡

ugh smh at all of us attempting to create anything......comrades in this mess for sure B/ when will we learn

✨ Favourite aesthetic?

i can enjoy some like Muted Atmospheric type palettes......like, dim lighting / atmospheric distancing, maybe some monochrome-leaning stuff, Desaturated Colors which is wild as i never use this aesthetic myself lmao and am being unusually “restrained” if i choose Non-100% Saturated Colors.......i like some nighttime / dusk type Visuals although then within that i like both like, more ~realistically~ muted/dark stuff And Also like stylistically brightened / more saturated blues than you’d Really see at night, plus maybe some Warm Lighting from some source, don’t have to lean full thomas kinkade with it or whatever but it’s good. and Sunset type lighting where there’s both like, some colorful Lighting but also more desaturated shadows.......i don’t go so much for earth / jewel tones really like, either Lighter & Brighter or Darker & More Muted is my like Palette sensibilities apparently

🔮 Any advice you would have given 10 y/o you?

i have to like count out like what year of school are people in at whatever age....that’d be circa 4th/5th grade i guess?? not much going on. 4th grade was that one [several scenes from julius caesar] where it was like oh this is pretty clear You’re A Theatre Gay (which i only put together v recently for how obvious it was lol) and also of Course You’re Trans lmao like, may as well explain not only what Being Trans is (i don’t like, particularly remember when i became aware of That Being A Thing was?? like i know i knew by 14 but...) and go ahead and explain being Nonbinary coz it Was a good few years before i like, heard of that as a concept.....speaking of the Circa-’10s Dialogue i could’ve explained “you aren’t obligated to like, lgbtq-dom to Come Out to your family” b/c my Attempt at that only inconvenienced me and it’s just not a good/true sentiment for anyone lol........took a minute to like, get Perspective on things where i had this assumption that i’d Age Out of what turned out to be more inherent issues like [you are autistic, and also queer, and ppl don’t always just Make Friend Groups by high school age lol] and [family dynamics are not all Like This and it seems like the ‘rents approach is Wild b/c it is and it’s not Really going to fundamentally change so just don’t worry about the Continual Strife lol not on you actually] like, there’s a real On The One Hand But On The Other matter where my getting to go away to college gave that chance for some crucial Distance / Perspective on things about myself and my existence, but also forever in “i kind of hate school despite whatever parts are alright-to-good” club and did i need to rack up the tuition-etc Costs, would i have been able to get the Perspective in high school? probably in part but i also would’ve probably hated the [academic] part more and also would’ve been around most of the same ppl since kindergarten and yet i was sitting at the Odds N Ends lunch table probably just reading, so even though i was also not magically Socially Thriving in college, it was better from that angle too.......maybe could’ve told myself to do Backstage Theatre Stuff, since there was that issue of “i like to Perform but didn’t quite enjoy Family Members seeing it lmao”......compromise about your theatre gayness? who knows. generally tell myself to not worry about being Not Unruly as much, see: [the conflict is inevitable and too fundamental] lmao from many angles......who tf knows what primers on [Political Awareness] i could give a 10 yr old, that’s sure developing more in those years............idk like there’s Much 2 Consider but at the same time even Theoretically i’m not pressed to mess with the timeline lmao. like really just Maybe the small tip like “people are trans and specifically being nonbinary is A Thing and you are not obligated to Come Out To Parents” like, lord knows you get enough of their [i suspect and resent my progeny is not gender &/or sexualitying Correctly] without even bothering to confirm it for them

🍺 Favourite drink?

damb.......i like a Coffee alright for like, non-practical reasons i.e. all caffeine is likely to do is make me even sweatier than usual........tea can be pretty good, i like fruit / mint flavors (separately...).......sweet tea / lemonade combo (or just sweet tea ft. like a lemon wedge) pretty much fucks, or just regular lemonade on its own lol.......orange juice is okay, teresa was talking abt orange juice And apple cider last night like yeah apple cider’s okay, i went from liking apple juice to finding it intolerable and now i think i Can power through it w/o enthusiasm but apple cider is always great. grape soda is good and so is orange soda, sprite, ginger ale......and also Grape Juice is rly good......s/o to Water, idk that anyone’s enthused or anything on average but thank you for the hydration........idk i’m just out here like Sipppp........just wanna avoid anything Overall bitter really (tea / coffee always gotta be sweetened.....if i’m having Alcohol it’s gotta be like some cocktail and even then i've like multiple times tried and failed to just power through a pina colada. various unsweetened Teas have also just been like, i’d rather have the plain water. oh yeah and sparkling water, tf is going on there, Gross......avoided it wholly for years but last i checked cherry juice Specifically is intolerable 2 me) but idk i guess yeah if you take the Average of everything the answer is just like. water.........this just epitomizes my Asks Answers lmfao there’s no real answer but i take forever writing down whatever thought crosses my mind in the course of figuring it out and go tl;dr n/a or [the most boring answer possible]

⚡ Ever had a Greek Mythology phase?

i feel like i’m sort of forgetting some aspects to the “not really but kind of” answer like, most summers i’d Partake in some sort of daytime 2-3 week Activities camp lmao and i feel like one of them of yore mayyyybe had some kind of greek mythology theme to it b/c we had yknow like these smaller groups and i think we had to come up with Skits explaining greek myths b/c our like 4-5 person group did Arachne and i’m fairly sure that everyone else’s was along those lines lmao nothing Completely Different.......most of what i really remember was like, first of all it’s that “i cannot simply Think Of An Idea” problem lmao like tf do you mean Create A Skit......but it wasn’t just Me so we worked around it lol. and anyways the most Memorable thing was like, the day before we were gonna Present these skits we were like “uh how are we gonna have a Visible Spider’s Web” and one of the people were like “i have like a sheet with a spiderweb design on it” and we were like are you gonna forget to bring it though, and then she forgot to bring it, and when someone in our group like told An Adult like “uh what do we do if a sort of essential prop is Unavailable” we were unhelpfully brushed off with “you’ll just have to use your imaginations” and so we bitterly were like Oh Is THAT The Sentiment Then............and what we did is like, i don’t remember what [sort of chorus / narrator] greek god i happened to be playing but i was the one to hold up the “web” like wow amazing weaving here, as per the myth of arachne, and since we didn’t have anything and were told to just use our imaginations to rectify the issue, i held up the corners of Absolutely Nothing and announced it was sure an incredible woven spider’s web, i.e. the audience had to Imagine It.........a real memorable event of Inspired Pettiness from us like 9 yr olds or whatever the fuck. lmfao. of course nobody would’ve given a shit either way but we were somewhat pressed about it so it was fun to just like, get that Stress brushed off and in turn go “ah fuck it then” lmfao

[ettadunham]

A Buffy rewatch 7x05 Selfless

aka be careful what you... you know the drill

We did it, guys! We made it to the last season! Also, hello if you’re new, and stumbled upon this without context. As usual, these impromptu text posts are the product of my fevered mind as I rant about the episode I just watched for an hour (okay, sometimes perhaps two). Anything goes!

And in today’s episode, it’s Anya time!

Selfless as a title is a word play on the two different Anya’s we meet at the beginning and the end of the episode. Anya or Aud in her old life was a bit of a misfit, but she was also selfless in her earnestness. And the Anya of today is struggling to find not just her place in the world but her entire identity. Her sense of self.

I know that some people dislike and find Anya’s background to be a bit of a retcon. Like how she apparently was always considered a weird person, and her behavior wasn’t just the product of her being a vengeance demon for a 1000 years. And I think those criticisms were in my head during the earlier flashbacks, and maybe that’s why I find those to be the weakest parts of an otherwise excellent episode.

But as the story went on, and we met Anya at different points in her life, I realized, that that won’t be my take here. No, I like that Aud was somewhat of a well-intentioned outcast. It explains why Anya didn’t bother to get familiar with human social norms – she never quite fit them in the first place, and she was even less interested once she became a vengeance demon.

Also, I’m putting this out there without much more elaboration because I don’t have the knowledge to expand upon it, but Anya may be on the autistic spectrum. So her character always having some of her socially non-conforming traits feels in line with that.

This backstory and Anya’s route to vengeance also fills in some interesting parts of her character. Anya was angry with Olaf, but it wasn’t some fiery rage that took her over. And it wasn’t just Olaf she was angry with. Anya felt slighted by the world, not just alone, but rejected by society. She didn’t have anyone or anything to turn to.

There’s also a pattern here of Anya hyperfocusing on something or someone in her life. First it was Olaf – it didn’t matter that the town didn’t accept her, because she had Olaf to build her life around. And when he betrayed her, she had vengeance. Halfrek even remarks upon how Anya wouldn’t enjoy life around her and was all work no play, but Anya didn’t even understand what she meant by that. She had vengeance. Vengeance was her life. And that was enough.

And then, when she didn’t have that, there was Xander. In season 4 especially you can see this singular focus Anya has for Xander. It’s only by season 5 that she even starts to integrate and connect with the rest of the Scoobies – which I think is part of why returning to vengeance proves such a difficult task for her.

Losing Xander made Anya want to return to her old patterns, but she was unable to put all her focus back into vengeance, because she didn’t lose her old connections. Not to the Scoobies, and not even Xander.

Anya’s stuck between worlds. And what’s even more painful, is the fact that she didn’t use to feel that way when she was a vengeance demon. While in the human world she was constantly looked down on and rejected, she fit right in with D’Hoffryn’s family. But now, she’s criticized for not committing to vengeance enough.

And make no mistake, she never felt quite accepted by the Scoobies either. Not all the way. But it was still more than she was used to, and it allowed her to make some real human connections. The first in millennia.

It was enough to keep her grounded to the world and humanity. Enough so that she could find no enjoyment in inflicting pain.

It actually hurt her.

But she felt trapped. If she couldn’t commit to vengeance she had no place with D’Hoffryn anymore, and she had nowhere else to go. So she tried, even if it made her feel horrible, maybe hoping that if she went too far, it’d numb her to the pain. Or that if she passed the point of no return, she could finally focus back on vengeance.

And there’s someone who definitely gets that. Willow.

So, following my big lightbulb moment about how Willow and Anya would actually work perfectly as a season 7 ship, Selfless just proved to be even more fodder to that idea. But you don’t even need to ship it to appreciate the dynamic of what’s happening here.

When Willow meets Anya on campus, and realizes that something’s off when she sees the blood on her hands, she doesn’t confront Anya about it. She knows better than that.

Instead she enters the frat house (it’s always a frat house, isn’t it), already expecting the outcome. She also has a weird moment of Dark Willow as she’s doing a protection spell against the spider monster, which… I wanna talk about that?

So, I distinctly remember interpreting Dark Willow as separate from regular Willow during my first time with the show, someone who emerges when Willow uses magic. Which is a dull take that I don’t really like these days, but I can also see teen-me coming to the conclusion from this scene, seeing the abrupt change in Willow’s personality.

But in reality, that outburst is Willow lashing out at the girl who made the wish that killed all those boys in the frat house. It’s not even just the trauma of seeing all those bodies; it’s the realization of what it means for Anya, and the inevitable confrontation with Buffy.

So instead Willow keeps those details to herself for the time being. She only tells Buffy that there’s a spider demon out for blood, while she goes to talk to Anya herself.

WILLOW:  “Anya, listen to me. You're in trouble. You know it. I'm here to help you.” ANYA:  “You're here to— Well, that's great, Willow. Flayed anybody lately, have you? How quickly they forget!” WILLOW:  “I haven't forgotten one second of it.” ANYA:  “What do you want?” WILLOW:  “I want to help you.”

Anya’s broken repetition of “they got what they deserved”? God. This scene is so good.

Still, when she doesn’t manage to convince Anya, Willow knows what she has to do. She tells Buffy.

Now, I’ll circle back to this scene, because we’ll also need to talk about Buffy, but for our purposes now, I want to highlight how the Scoobies see the situation. Buffy knows that as soon as Anya becomes a real threat, she has to deal with her accordingly. Xander meanwhile refuses to even engage with the idea that they might need to kill Anya to stop her.

And Willow? Willow’s right there in-between. She understands fully the threat Anya poses, but also the inner conflict present. She doesn’t argue or fight Buffy on killing Anya, but she also refuses to help. She doesn’t go with her to support or stop her. She can’t.

When Xander and Buffy argue, they bring up Willow’s case, but Buffy says that it was different, because Willow’s human. However, you get the sense that Willow herself isn’t making that distinction. She’d expect Buffy to try and stop her by all means necessary if it came down to it once again.

But when Buffy tells Xander to help her find another way, it ends up inspiring Willow. So she uses the amulet D’Hoffryn gave her back in season 4 to summon him, and to offer Anya something that nobody else bothered.

A choice.

So, essentially, Willow is the one that saved Anya in this episode. Not by any life-saving grand gesture, but by giving her a chance to decide for herself. Even if it meant for Anya to choose her own death over those she caused recently.

But D’Hoffryn of course had to go and twist that choice, where he instead killed Halfrek to make Anya suffer. This is the most overtly malicious and threatening D’Hoffryn ever gets, living up to his vengeance demon patriarch title. We’ve seen him prey upon these women in their moments of weakness, and here, he finally shows his real colors openly.

Anya’s devastated. This was her oldest, and for centuries, only friend. And she died in her stead. It’s cruel.

But Anya now Is also free. And not just from vengeance, but from her dependence from it. Or Xander. She’s free and she’s lost, but now she has the opportunity to find herself yet again.

And then there’s Buffy, who knows exactly who she is.

(On a sidenote, how delightful is it when Buffy just throws the axe up to the trees to catch the spider demon? I love her so much, you guys don’t even know.)

During the majority of the show, Buffy struggled with her identity, with who she is, what it means, what she’d have to do, what her purpose is… But by season 7, she’s mostly settled into her role, embracing all that came with it.

But that in itself will lead to her struggle this season. Buffy has the power to fight evil, and protect the rest of the world, so she feels responsible to do so. And she knows that she can’t expect someone else to make the hard choices, because there’s no one else. She can’t make someone else wear her burdens, and she can’t trust them to make her own choices for her. No one has the answers. In the end, we’re all just human.

Still, you may ask, isn’t Buffy human too? Doesn’t she make mistakes all the same? And the answer is yes. She can mess up, and if she does, it can affect the lives of everyone around her. That’s why it’s not the final end to Buffy’s arc.

When Faith told Buffy in season 3 that they were the law, she rejected it. But now, she echoes it. Of course, back then, Faith was trying to deflect responsibility, while Buffy emphasizes her own responsibility using the same words. Both roads lead to a sense of superiority nevertheless, it’s just one is an empty façade, masking an inner struggle, while the other is an acceptance of the power and responsibility that was already thrust upon it.

I don’t think Buffy’s approach of taking this all upon herself is the right answer ultimately, and neither does she by the end. But much like with Anya, she doesn’t see another way, and it’s an understandable response to how everyone’s been relying on her to make these decisions for many seasons now.

That’s what stings about Xander’s attitude here. They’ve been all expecting Buffy to deal with things, whether it’s her own trauma or the apocalypse, to take responsibility and make the hard choices for them; and then turn around and judge her for it. It’s also what makes the scene so cathartic, as Buffy calls out Xander on his own hypocrisy.

XANDER:  “You think we haven't seen all this before? The part where you just cut us all out. Just step away from everything human and act like you're the law. If you knew what I felt—“ BUFFY:  “I killed Angel! Do you even remember that? I would have given up everything I had to be with— I loved him more than I will ever love anything in this life. And I put a sword through his heart because I had to.” […] XANDER:  “This is different.” BUFFY:  “It is always different! It's always complicated. And at some point, someone has to draw the line, and that is always going to be me. You get down on me for cutting myself off, but in the end the slayer is always cut off. There's no mystical guidebook. No all-knowing council. Human rules don't apply. There's only me. I am the law.”

Still, Xander has a point in arguing too of course. Someone has to argue for Anya’s humanity and challenge Buffy’s authority on life and death.

It’s also worth mentioning though that by the end, Buffy also closes with the aforementioned “then please find another way”.

Buffy isn’t necessarily shutting Willow and Xander out in the way she’d used to. She just assumed authority, made the call and asked for their help.

Oh yeah, and also, we finally get a resolution to Xander’s lie at the end of season 2. Kind of. It gets kind of brushed past, but it’s out in the open now. After 4 and a half seasons.

I just love this show and its stupid brilliant long character arcs.

[mediaeval-muse]

Book Review... Gwen Rowley, “Knights of the Round Table: Gawain”

Rating: 2/5 stars

Genre: fantasy romance

Part of a Series? Yes, Knights of the Round Table #3 (of 3)

Summary: Loyal Sir Gawain pledges to marry a hideous crone in exchange for the answer to a riddle that will save King Arthur's life. But the loathly lady is actually the lovely Aislyn, former sorceress, in disguise, who is out to make Gawain pay for rejecting her in the past. Then Aislyn finds herself enchanted by the gallant knight.

***Full review under the cut.***

Overview: I’m currently reading a bunch of romance novels with a friend of mine as a way of getting more familiar with the genre, and I remember seeing this book recommended by another medieval enthusiast, so the two of us decided to give it a whirl. While the idea of retelling the story of Gawain and Ragnelle isn’t inherently a bad one, I felt like this book missed the mark in so many ways. There were some saving graces; the relationship between Arthur and Gawain was very well done, in my opinion. It just wasn’t enough to make up for the things that bothered me.

Trigger Warnings: violence, misogyny, rape

Writing: Rowley writes with a fairly straightforward prose style, but one that tells a lot rather than shows. It wasn’t the most irritating style I’ve encountered; it just made the book more skimmable, which I guess could be a good thing if you’re a reader who likes to get through books quickly. Some of the dialogue was humorous (by design), which made for a more light-hearted reading experience; it did feel very modern than what I would expect of medieval characters, aside from a few stray “yons” and “lemans” thrown in to make it feel more archaic. Honestly, I preferred the more modern style rather than the fake medieval-speak, since the medievalisms made the dialogue feel more wooden than natural. But overall, the I didn’t find the style unbearable - it just wasn’t interesting. The major flaw in the writing, for me, was the random insertion of characters’ memories and flashbacks. They occurred at random moments that interrupted the flow of the story - they sometimes interrupted a sentence that continued on after the memory was over! I would have preferred flashbacks be handled more deliberately, not thrown in whenever something in the plot vaguely reminded a character of something from their past.

Plot: As I mentioned above, the idea of retelling the story of Gawain and Ragnelle isn’t a bad one. I love authors who try to rework medieval tales to give women more agency and character. Unfortunately, Rowley decided to do so in a way that cut out a lot of the most interesting stuff from the original tale. We start with the end of the story, when Aislyn, disguised as a crone named Ragnelle, agrees to give Arthur the answer to his quest in exchange for Gawain’s hand in marriage. Rather than the curse being inflicted on her before the marriage, as it is in the medieval tale, the curse is inflicted after, when a character is trying to punish Aislyn for messing with Gawain (in the form of her using her crone form to torture him for a past slight). For me, this killed all the excitement and shifted the focus away from the original message of the tale (about female agency and sexual dynamics) to one about how love can overcome barriers. It would have been a good shift, but I didn’t get the sense that love was overcoming barriers by the end of the book - Gawain doesn’t seem to actually learn the lesson from the original tale, and Aislyn mostly struggles with whether or not to be obedient to Gawain. While I can understand wanting to make female characters more agentive from the beginning, I found this book’s reworking of the plot less interesting than the original medieval tale. The change in focus also made the plot drag a little bit. In the first 80 pages, all of the focus was on Gawain’s disgust at Ragnelle’s form or Aislyn’s/Ragnelle’s desire for revenge. We follow Gawain and Ragnelle as they explore married life, which isn’t as exciting as it sounds since Gawain is forever struggling with Ragnelle’s ugliness and Ragnelle/Aisling is always looking for ways to torment him. After Aislyn is formally cursed on pages 85-86, the plot has a goal, but nothing in the structure of the narrative seems to work towards that goal in a very efficient way. Events don’t seem to build on one another, so the plot didn’t feel like it had shape. There are also a few events that seem to be inserted to show conflict between Gawain and Lancelot, and some that showcase Gawain’s anguish over his past. While some of these things bring Ragnelle and Gawain closer together, the conflict with Lancelot and Gawain’s emotional pain definitely overshadowed the moments of tenderness between the characters. What I disliked the most, however, was that everyone - main characters and side characters alike - seemed to be in petty conflict with one another. There’s obvious tension between Gawain and Lancelot, and Aislyn’s inner thoughts about Guinevere and the other ladies of the court disappointed me (why can’t we have more medievaly stories in which women band together, I ask). Aside from these conflicts, everyone got on my nerves for treating Ragnelle as subhuman. While their treatment of her could have been the moral lesson of the book, it didn’t come through consistently; I did get the sense that the book was supposed to showcase how Camelot isn’t the paradise it is made out to be, but a lot of the mistreatment felt like drama or humor rather than a teaching tool. I did like, however, that Ragnelle’s purpose seemed to change so that she was at the center of a lot of conflicts between men - in this way, I think she exposed a lot of the underlying problems in a male homosocial society. However, as much as she pointed to a lot of the problems, she also perpetuated them.

Characters: I had an extremely hard time liking either Aislyn or Gawain for a large portion of this book. Aislyn, our heroine, is constantly thinking ill of other women or thinking herself better than them, except in incidents. She’s out for revenge, and while I get that being left by a man you loved is devastating, I personally find seeking revenge for that a little petty, especially when you can just use your words and clear up any misconceptions. She got better as the book progressed, standing up for other women and calling out injustice, but I still had a hard time with her, since she seemed to waver between being a strong-willed character and being a bully. Gawain, despite being one of the best knights in Arthurian lore, starts out as kind of a sexist jerk with a lot of emotional turmoil from his past. His sense of honor was admirable, and I want to make clear that I do think that aspect of him was well done, but he was so angsty that his main purpose was to be a wet blanket for most of the book. I also wasn’t wholly convinced he had changed in his ways by the end of the book. The villains of the piece weren’t even that interesting. Morgause is completely one-dimensional: a power-hungry seductress whose motives aren’t exactly clear and, based on her actions, poses next to no real threat to anyone. Somer Gromer Jour (or Launfal), Aislyn’s brother, could have been interesting if Morgause herself wasn’t so over-the-top and Launfal had more of a purpose other than to be Morgause’s victim. Lancelot and Guinevere are also turned into antagonists by the way they blatantly disrespect not only Ragnelle, but other knights of the Round Table. It was kind of a mess. But despite all that, I did like the relationship between Arthur and Gawain. They had some nice exchanges that showed how complex their dynamic was, with Arthur being both Gawain’s king and uncle. Gawain and Ragnelle also had some nice moments where they were honest with one another, and those bits were well done.

Other Romance: I honestly didn’t see much romantic chemistry between Aislyn and Gawain, perhaps because Aislyn was so antagonistic towards him for so long. Don’t get me wrong - I’m a fan of enemies-to-lovers tropes, but this novel didn’t really feel like it was really getting to the heart of the angst and pain between the characters and working on unraveling it. Instead, the conflict was easily cleared up by just talking (even if the characters didn’t act on it for a long time). Instead, their relationship felt more platonic, which wouldn’t be a problem if this book was marketed as a genre other than romance. Misogyny: I understand that a lot of authors writing about the Middle Ages will embed some sexism in their books, but I am still irritated when I see it. Rowley has Gawain start out as holding very misogynistic views, despite his medieval counterpart being one of the most courteous knights to women (and even in the book, Gawain wavers back and forth). The book also makes use of various tropes which  I dislike: Morgause is a seductress who (I think) rapes Launfal regularly, characters use words like “bitch” and “slut,” a male character views his wife as worthless for not bearing a son, etc. Poor Guinevere couldn’t catch a break since she was being portrayed as a cheating harlot the whole time, and Morgana popped in for all of 10 seconds to serve her part in the plot before moving on. Rowley also writes an episode where the Saxons blame the women for the peaceweaver system failing, which was utterly baffling to me. And Gawain still seems to hold his view that a wife should be obedient to her husband until the very last second - around page 307 of the book.

Moving on to Other Books in the Series? No.

Recommendations: I would recommend this book if you’re a romance reader or interested in Arthurian retellings.

[identityexcavationstation]

Week 3: Collaging Connection

Hey fellow gamerz! Guess who’s returned to printmaking! That’s right, after a yearlong hiatus, I’m back with the ink-smudged content you’ve all been clamoring for. I’m not exactly sure why I dropped printmaking so fast and so completely after the 2018 winter semester. Maybe it was because Intro to Lithography was physically, emotionally, and spiritually exhausting. Maybe it was because I wanted one year of my life to be completely free of ink stains covering all of the clothes I own. Or maybe I just needed to take a break to remember why I like printmaking so much, to truly appreciate a good Saturday studio session: just me and my mylar, choking on the smell of oil-based ink and mineral spirits. 

Last weekend, I took a whole afternoon to make monoprints and I loved every second of it. Was the ink too loose? Sure. Did I, at one point, forget how to draw an S, consequentially printing a piece in which every S is backwards as if I’m some sort of toddler who just learned how to print the alphabet? Yup. Did I leave the studio covered in black and red ink, looking like I had just committed a gruesome murder in a coal mine? Absolutely. But I made some pretty cool prints; check ‘em out!

The source images here were outtakes from a film photo project I did last year, which focused on inhabiting the memory of my teenage self, recreating a fictional persona and doing things she (I) once did. I recreated the outfit, hairstyle, and makeup look I wore during my senior photoshoot because when I think of the person I was trying to be in high school, she looks like a poor replica of a Modcloth model. I danced, posed, and pouted for the camera at the Baits tennis courts because, as an emo teen, I would walk to the tennis courts in my neighborhood and lie down by the nets, spin around, dance like no one was watching (and, luckily, no one was). 

The translation of these images from photo to monoprint fascinates me. The prints, in their messiness and blemishes and inconsistencies, bring to mind so many connections I never would have made otherwise. The white ghost prints against the black ink reminds me of chalk on a chalkboard; the cracks in the tennis court, when drawn in red ink, look like little rivers of blood. The lighter area in Image 4 and the darker area in Image 2 are the same shape, but one resembles smoke while the other resembles shadow. 

I messed around with these images a little more on Tuesday, playing with scale and stencils. Here’s an image of all of the work I’ve made, together as a collection: 

Yesterday, as I was tacking all of this up, one of my classmates commented that her favorite piece was the newsprint cutout that I’d used as a stencil for the yellow layer of my bigger monotype (shown top right), and I couldn’t help but agree. Even though it wasn’t meant to be a piece at all, its oversized-paper-doll-like nature sticks out as dynamic and expressive, both flattened and very much alive. The decontextualization of the image is what really strikes me: when removed from the physical setting of the tennis court, the figure seems to be leaning back onto thin air, reaching out for something to cushion its fall. The fact that this figure is cut off at the torso is both startling and engaging; it looks like it’s emerging from behind a wall or beneath a body of water. 

After seeing Nick and Endi demo printmaking collage techniques in class yesterday, I am so excited to experiment with some large-scale collage projects that develop and explore this visual narrative, this vernacular I’m creating around my teenage years. Just like I’m attempting to do in my book for IP, I can’t wait to see what happens when I place these symbols together, rearrange them into a silent sentence: if my audience saw a tennis net, a 24 oz. can of Arnold Palmer, a worn-out pair of Doc Martens, a page torn from Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë, what would that mean? 

I’m also thinking of these pieces within the context of my IP exhibition as I complete my exhibition plan for next Tuesday. Should I make a massive chine-collé triptych that corresponds with my narrative, a piece for each wall of my studio space? What about covering my walls with paper cutouts and wheat-pasting them on—a transitional, time-specific piece for the transitional period of growth I aim to depict and explore? What does it say about my hand-held IP that in my printmaking work I want to work big and expansive, fill my studio walls the way a teen girl pastes magazine cutouts on the walls of her bedroom? 

These are the questions I aim to answer, or at least explore further, in my exhibition plan. In the time between now and April, I hope to work tirelessly to create a visual language in printmaking, a world in which my yearbook can shine. 

[hellzyeahthewebwieldingavenger]

Spider-Force #2 Thoughts

The text at the issue’s end advertising issue #3 includes the phrase ‘what-the-heck-just-happened’.

All too appropriate for this series.

 In issue #1 there was a sense of...confusion on my part. A sense of ‘why is this happening, who are these people, what’s going on’. Not for the over all plot but for specific elements, such as regarding Charlie. I thought maybe the consequent issues will flesh this out.

But with issue #2 I doubt that.

Some things were answered but other things played out in head scratching ways. In fairness I think it’s less a matter of what happened so much as the presentation of it.

I think the key example here is Ashley and Charlie’s relationship.

The idea that Ashley would seek to connect to a version of her grandfather isn’t an uninteresting angle per se.

However having her open up to Charlie and encourage Charlie himself to open up to her whilst they are literally tumbling through space is a baffling creative decision. I’m wondering if Priest went that direction to be funny (he does lampshade it a little) or if he just needed to cram it in there.

This baffling use of presentation applies to stuff that is initially confusing but gets answered later, but isn’t presented initially as something that is posing a mystery or a question in the first place. One example would be Charlie’s initial recruitment and him saving the falling safe. Another would be when we get 3 flashbacks in a row from the POV of Astro-Spider, Ashley and Charlie. When you first see this it’s very confusing because they don’t seem to line up and it’s not clear that we are getting flashbacks to all 3 characters. The fact that Charlie’s past was being dived into was immediately made clear when he yells for Astro-Spider to get out of his head. But it isn’t until way later in the comic that we find out we also got to see Ashley’s past.

Granted maybe that’s on my end because I’m not overly familiar with Ashley.

This brings up a point of debate regarding presumed knowledge on the readers’ parts. I have read Old Man Logan but it was a while back and shockingly I was more focussed upon Logan’s story than anyone else’s. And yet knowing the wider world building and Ashley’s angle would’ve made a point of alienation in the story much more accessible, but I was never told or reminded of that aspect. In contrast though Astro-Spider’s origin is clearly connected to the cosmic rays that created the Fantastic Four. And at first I didn’t bat an eye at that because of course I know the F4’s origins. But then I got to Ashley’s character and it made me realize if you didn’t know the F4’s origin you’d seriously be baffled by Astro-Spider’s. So at the end of the day I feel very much it’s a failing on Priest’s part that he doesn’t have some kind of exposition or explanation that will be more inviting to new or unfamiliar readers. After all it’s maybe one thing to presume general knowledge about Spider-Man when you are writing a Spidey tie-in for a Spidey event but quite another when doing that to presume they’ve also read F4 and Wolverine comics.

Even putting aside the issue of presumed knowledge there is a certain...cheapness to the modest exploration of Ashley’s character and her relationship with Charlie.

Now I read Old Man Logan a while back (and wasn’t impressed at all) and don’t remember everything about it. I also didn’t read all of Spider-Verse and skimmed a lot of the stuff I did ‘read’. So maybe I’m forgetting or in the dark about something in need of enlightening. But I don’t remember Ashley being a sexual abuse survivor. I don’t remember Ashley having particular connections to her grandpa Peter Parker.

These elements to her are thrown into this and the last comic and then exaggerated in order to give her some kind of emotional angle through her connection to Charlie. Now first of all throwing in so casually an abuse backstory for any character is pretty messed up (not helped when pages later the Inheritors are framed as pedophiles when...they’re really not at all). Second of all if Ashley really felt this kind of connection to her grandpa...wouldn’t that have come up earlier?

I mean she is emphasising a familiar connection with a version of Peter Parker who doesn’t wear the regular costume, has a drastically different character and backstory, isn’t even called ‘Peter’ and is barely a teenager not an older man like her grandpa. Surely there were other Peter Parkers around more closely resembling her grandfather. IIRC wasn’t Otto in Spider-Verse pretending to be Peter Parker initially? What about Kaine even? You could argue she connects with Charlie due to a similar backstory of being a child victim and growing up fast, but other Spiders were tough too and even if you disagree again it’s just sort of thrown in there. It’s lazy development.

It isn’t even that these aspects couldn’t be explored or make for interesting angles on what is ultimately a rather bland character. But they sort of just show up they aren’t conveyed or developed organically at all. The same applies to her over all relationship with Charlie.

If I had to guess the root of this is that there is too much going on in this comic. Priest simultaneously needs to serve the plot of the over all event he’s tying into but also wants to dosome character stuff and develop and flesh out his original contributions. And in 3 issues it just doesn’t work.

A street punk 13 year old Peter Parker who HATES Uncle Ben is a great idea.

A post-apocalyptic waste land criminal, childhood abuse surviving granddaughter of Spider-Man, who wants to connect some version of her long gone grandpa who represents the few good parts of her life is a great angle.

An astronaught Spider-Man who is a familiar face and leader of human survivors in space is a great idea.

A Spider Strikeforce on a suicide mission on a radioactive wasteland working against the clock is a great idea.

A morally grey clone of Peter Parker with a bloody past making tough decisions to serve the greater good is a great idea.

A Spider-Hero who just wants to protect the world for her baby’s sake is a great idea.

A Regency dressed totem vampire on the hunt for a crystal containing her father’s essence in space...is a shite idea but they can’t all be winners.

However when you do these things all at the same time...it becomes an inconsistent rushed mess.

Let’s tangent briefly to talk about a few (the only few) positives of the comic. The art continued to be good even though the new artists doing a few pages aren’t as good as the regular artists and the switch is very noticeable. And Astro-Spider...is a great idea. John Jameson as Spider-Man is something I’ve always been intrigued by but can’t recall ever happening before. This is different to what I imagined because I was thinking he’d be more traditional as Spider-Man not an astronaut version of Spidey. But it’s still brilliant, taking the most famous angle of John Jameson, the F4 and Spidey and smashing them together to create something visually dynamic and fitting for the world we’re in.

Okay the positives are over now lets get back to the problems.

Last issue the recap page seemed at odds with the internal comic story. The same is true for this issue but bizarrely the recap page is now saying something different so it’s at odds with the last issue’s recap page and still at odds with the comic itself.

We’ve gone from a group of Spiders not afraid to die to Spiders who’re willing to do whatever it takes. But last I checked that wasn’t true. Correct me if I’m wrong here but:

a)      Was Charlie really established as being willing to do whatever it takes, which in context probably means killing people? He’s more rough and maybe more violent than 616 Peter but is he that extreme really?

b)      In the Clone Saga Kaine killed people but he had a rule about hurting innocent people (some exceptions applied). Preeeeetty sure in his solo book at minimum the same applied or else he was in fact more against killing. Didn’t he NOT kill Kraven the Hunter specifically because of that? He also wasn’t ever willing to sacrifice anyone for the greater good last I checked. In fact this is one point I’m 99% resolutely sure is aggressively NOT in character for Kaine. For Otto sure, but Kaine as the comic implies. No fucking way. I dare you to prove me wrong.

c)       I know Spider Woman has had spy and HYDRA associations, but is she really of the Wolverine school of thought when it comes to killing. I’m possibly wrong but I don’t think her morals regarding how hardcore you get are that different to Peter Parker’s

So what’s the deal here?

Wouldn’t it be easier to just say this is a team of Spider Bad asses who’re willing to get more rough and violent than the other hero’s?

Part of Kaine’s (meagre) characterization in this story is in fact connected to the ‘whatever it takes’ angle of the story. Like I said this is very out of character for Kaine but it also makes the story more inconsistent. The rationale for Charlie’s inclusion has seemed to be implied variously as him being rougher, him being willing to die (based on what?), him being willing to do whatever it takes (based on what?), him being willing to save people from a falling safe (just like...pretty much ever Spider-Hero here) and now we’re hearing it’s because he’s bait.

Because the Inheritors are sort of like pedophiles apparently and they like that young spider meat, like veal I guess. Um....again correct me if I’m wrong but I’m pretty sure that’s bullshit, pretty sure the youth of their targets isn’t that big of a deal to them. But then again I’m also pretty sure that they can only drain the life forces of totems yet Verna bafflingly can just take ANYONE’s life forces...wtf??????

Connected to this WTFness is the fact that Charlie out of nowhere seems to just know  the Inheritors have a preference for young meat. How and when did he figure that out exactly? He didn’t even know about the Inheritors until less than 24 hours ago.

Speaking of time...let’s do a rundown of everything that’s happened between their arrival in issue #1 to the end of issue #2.

So they’ve shown up, Kaine’ sabotaged their transport devices, they’ve battled Astro-Spider, he’s given them exposition and they’ve talked, they’ve located and boarded his space ship, then they’ve had an alert from his space station prompting another skirmish, then they’ve gone into space, divided their team, gotten to their designated target zones and whilst all this is going on Verna got into the station with her gang and had killed over 30 people and searched the place.

And according to issue #1 aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaall that...happens in under 15 minutes...

Fuck.

Off.

More than anything that time limit has irreparably wrecked the internal logic and consistency of this story.

Even moreso than the fact that the baffling fact that Solus’ crystal somehow ended up in space. I mean last I checked Mayday threw it into the radioactive world for Daemos to fetch. I’m not saying there is no way for it to have been lost and taken into space but no comic in the entire event has addressed that at all.

Skim Astro-Spider’s backstory and pages if you want but otherwise I recommend not reading this crap.

P.S. The explanation for the name ‘Inheritors’ seems inconsistent with the explanation given previously IIRC

P.P.S. Editing this in after the fact. But...

a) How and why does John have the ruby that turns him into Man-Wolf if he’s got Spider powers?

b) How and why does John know who Peter Parker is? It’s written as though he knows he was the hero Spider-Man but in this universe he wasn’t Ben Parker was. 

P.P.P.S. What was with all the PG swearing where they used safe versions of common curse words? It felt tryhard edgy to me.

[blondecarfucker]

Creatures of the Night (Part 1)

Roger Taylor x Reader

BoRhap!Roger Taylor x Reader

Fic Summary: You're a videographer, and you get the opportunity of a lifetime as you're invited to direct and film the News of the World documentary. But you don't expect to fall for the photogenic drummer.

Fic Note: I've been thinking about this for a few months, really - ever since I was about to complete my last fic. Now that it's complete, here it is! There's only three parts to it, which I know it's short compared to my last fic, but hey, sometimes there's not as much story to tell. This is a shorter, more intense one. That being said, the chapters are gonna be longer than usual. Hope you enjoy it! I'd love to get some feedback since I haven't really explored this mature, more wild side of the band. And if it's the first time you're stumbling upon my writing, hello and welcome! I have a masterlist in my bio with a huge, long Roger fic called Bed of Roses, and a few requests and challenges - the one for the song Ocean Eyes is a personal favorite. I can't put the link here or Tumblr will make this post disappear - I'm sorry.

Chapter's notes: HELLO EVERYONE im quite proud of this story and i hope you enjoy it as much as i did. its inspired on the documentary so theres a bunch of bits and pieced from there here. not much to say now, so here it goes!!

Words: 4.7k

Warnings: mentions of sex, drug use, cursing

Part 1 - Waxing Moon

The first time you ever saw him, you knew you could never forget his face.

It was the prettiest face you've seen, alright, but that didn't seem to capture it just right - it sounded too childish, too mundane. His face was different - his skin reflected the light beautifully, like marble, little imperfections only adding to the texture, making it more interesting. You wanted to photograph him.

But he was even better being filmed, the way he'd smile when thinking about what to say, the way his messy, bleached hair bounced back the light and burnt the film made him look angelical, a halo around his head - you couldn't wait to see how it looked on the cutting room.

You were a videographer on Tiswas, a dumb gig you've only accepted cause it payed better than your last one, but it was good for your portfolio - Sally James, the host, was unbelievably beautiful, and you had almost no supervision, so you could easily film her in a more cinematic, artistic manner, something you'd never be allowed to do as a cameraman on television news - or cameraperson, as people said uncomfortably when they realized you were a woman operating the camera.

It took awhile for people on TV news to take you seriously - a tiny, young women in oversized clothing and hair pulled back in the middle of old, strong man - but you were their best videographer before you were even hired, getting the job after selling them footage from Woodstock when you were only 19. In the middle of a stoned, drunken haze, you were still cold blooded enough to film the whole festival, almost getting lost from your friends as you tried to get clear audio, doing more artistic work as you filmed during an acid trip. Your parents would kill you if they knew you took your expensive video camera to the festival, but it got you a job.

And what a job. It was you the editor in chief chose to film the signing of the Beatles Agreement, and you followed George Harrison around as he tried to find the room where all the Beatles agreed to end the band that you loved maniacally during your teenage years, trying not to shake as you filmed the reaction on the streets. You wanted to scream along all the desperate girls in their mid-twenties.

But back at Tiswas, the very short interview was cemented in your memory as one of your favorites just because of him. You knew who Roger Taylor was before you've filmed him - you saw his face on the videos for Queen, but you didn't really care for him or the band, really. You almost liked them in their Killer Queen days, just because you loved glam rock, but you felt indifferent to their opera rock - you felt like Bohemian Rhapsody was a bloated mess, and it's success only made the band go on with their overly edited stuff.

But during the lighting test, still makeup-less, a bit shy, having to promote an album alone, probably thinking about flirting with Sally - dazed and confused, photogenic and beautiful - that was the first time you really saw him, no distractions.

So when you got home, a year after the interview, to a voicemail inviting you to direct a documentary for Queen's News of the World Tour, you thought of him, his bright smile permanently marked on your film, even before you thought of the logistics of the job.

A week later, you met the only other crew member that would help you do your job - Josh Barnes, another twenty something videographer that didn't have a portfolio as impressive as yours, but did have a messy curly hair and odd clothing, so he grabbed your attention. You were informed you'd share hotel rooms during the tour.

But Josh wasn't the only one grabbing your attention then, cause that was the day you met the band and the tour crew, and you could swear the band members forgot your name as soon as you told them, Roger only spending a fraction of a second longer looking at you once you were introduced. You wondered if he remembered you.

They set up to perform one of their singles, We Are The Champions, so you can have some footage of them on studio, and you can't help but enjoy the melody, glad it was simple - you could only hope you enjoy the rest of the songs they play on tour, or else it would be a painful gig, since you'll be filming their every rehearsal and every show for the next few months.

You feel like you're being watched by some of the people higher up than you, people that definitely could still fire you on your first day, so you're quick to establish a dynamic with Josh, explaining what you intend to do that day and delegating him tasks.

But once you two go inside the recording booth, where the band is talking and waiting for you to start filming, you realize there's no room for two people to work - one of you would keep appearing on the other's footage. So you tell Josh to stay outside and clear your throat to get the attention of the band.

"Can you take your places? I'm trying to decide how I'm gonna film this", you say, and they exchange glances before getting to their places - you were sure Freddie held a laugh. You knew you were considered bossy, but hell, you always got the job done flawlessly, so be it.

"So Freddie and Roger can't move, since the drum kit and the piano are too heavy to move around quickly", you said, more to yourself them to the rest of the band. "Brian and John, can you lean on these amps?" you ask, and they do as you tell them.

"Sorry for bossing you around already. As a director, that's basically my job. But, if you pay attention, now you're all forming a triangle on the room, so I can fit you all in a well composed shot if I stay behind any of you", you explain, and Roger raises his eyebrow to Freddie, almost asking for confirmation - you heard that Freddie was more of a visual artist as well. He nodded lightly back at the drummer.

So you position yourself behind Freddie's shoulder and start a countdown, so the band understands you're recording. They start playing, and you walk along them - Freddie was looking down as he played the piano, so the lights weren't as flattering, and Brian and John were done with their bits once you focused on them, so you were quick enough to film Roger, basically doing a 360 around him.

You filmed him as you were in front of the drums, and then started to go around them. You wish you had Josh along with you so you could do some closeups - his hands twirling the drumstick on his left hand, the cigarette hanging from his lips, his profile against the black foam covering the walls. But you didn't have another videographer, so you had to do a very conscious effort to stop filming him and go back to Brian and John, now playing their instruments, while you're still dazed by his strong scent - cologne and cigarette smoke, even stronger once you were behind him, his shorter hair on your viewfinder.

You were happy to get his profile later, as they sang the vocals, and a few closeups of his long fingers twirling the sticks in the middle of closeups of John strumming his bass, contre-plongées of Brian on the guitar and shots of Freddie playing the piano against the light.

"She's very decided", you heard Freddie say once you were all outside the recording booth, a small distance between you as you packed. "I like her", Roger said, his voice much raspier than you remembered. "Feels like she knows what she's doing", he completed, and you smiled as you zipped your equipment bag shut.

The other day on studio, you felt like Roger was being funny specifically for your camera - ordering a coffee with one and 3/7 sugars, and saying a song sounded great since his part hasn't been recorded. You watched him tense up as you kneeled down beside him on the mixing desk, turning his face away from you.

It didn't help your work that the whole band was camera shy. John was sweet, and was able to give good answers even in the most improbable interview situations, like the time you interviewed him on a car. Brian was quite honest on his answers, unlike Freddie, usually sarcastic, and Roger, who never really properly answered what you asked. But in every candid shot you tried to get, every spontaneous moment, they shut down, still not used to your presence.

Roger was more open to you and your camera once he was drunk, posing with his bottle of wine with John by his side on studio, giving proper answers to your questions on the album's launch party, a glass of champagne on his hand.

He got used to having you close to him eventually, since one of your favorite angles to shoot was the view from behind his shoulder when Freddie was not on the piano, trying to fit in the small space between Roger and the gong behind him. Roger was tense at first, feeling you mere inches from him, but relaxed as you got used to each other's movements, a choreography where you knew the moments you should go a little further away from him so he could turn to the side and sing, a natural flow developing between the two of you.

Once, during your lunch break, you were talking to Josh when you heard music, so you dropped your sandwich, got your camera and ran to the rehearsal stage in mere seconds, only to find Freddie on the drums and Roger on Brian's guitar, the Red Special, and as soon as Freddie saw you - the camera already on - he almost stopped drumming, but he went on as you and Roger nodded together in encouragement, smiling at each other once Freddie drummed, and you quickly turned your camera to capture Roger's smile again, taking a few seconds to remember you should try to properly compose a shot, moving around to include John on the foreground.

You were happy no one was checking your work but Josh, because it would be embarrassing - you did film Roger more than you should, having as much footage of him as you had of Freddie, the frontman, the one in a gloriously sparkling Paco Rabanne leotard instead of hidden behind the drums.

But Roger was just so goddamn photogenic - his shyness in front of the camera appearing in form of joking around once he realized you were filming, pretending to pick his nose, showing his tongue, taking his robe off dramatically in the dressing room.

It was him on the center of the frame when you filmed without thinking much - in every shot of the band discussing during the rehearsal, or in shots of him and Deacon driving there, or even when you filmed candid moments; it was almost as if you responded unconsciously to his movements, always focusing on him.

You were torn between just thinking that Roger was a good model and actually being attracted to him. You only realized how frustrated he got you once you were already on tour with them, in America.

He sent one of the roadies to tell you that he and Freddie would rehearse Get Down, Make Love. You were in your shared room with Josh, and you'd usually sent him to film this - it wasn't super important, just some extra B-Roll - but he was napping, snoring soundly. Poor guy stayed up later than you, since you gave him the task of organizing the footage and taking care of the equipment. He almost never complained, a sweet boy that always did as you told him, always looking a bit too pretty on his shorts and band shirts, always too respectful to openly flirt with you, but always giving you the space to do so, reminding you he was single in every opportunity he had - nearly boring, but cute, nearby and accessible.

One time you were truly pissed with him - he only caught audio of the band arguing once you were not around to film it, forgetting to take the lens cap off - and he apologized and apologized, never even talking back at you.

So you didn't wake Josh up and went to the venue, across the street from the hotel, to find them already playing.

At first, you got them on wide, but without the lights, it just looked flat. So you started filming closeups.

Roger pouted in concentration in an extreme closeup you did, and you realized your breathing was heavy, right as you watched him lightly rub his lips against the mic groaning "Get down", his face only dimly lit on one side, and you subconsciously pressed your thighs together, kneeling on the side of the drum riser. You took a deep breath and forced yourself to zoom out, your hands a bit shaky as you got up and walked to Freddie, so you could film him and calm down.

But you were so frustrated, you just needed someone to touch you and to be touched as you wanted, needed to touch Roger, but you didn't knew anyone on the cities you were visiting.

That night, you stayed up as Josh organized the footage and the equipment, putting new film into the two cameras with his long fingers - quite similar to Roger's. Once he was done, you decided to take a quick shower, and left the bathroom still wrapped in a towel, the first move you made on him.

That was the first night you fucked Josh out of desire caused by Roger - the first of many.

You couldn't flirt with Roger - he had a gorgeous girlfriend and pretty groupies everywhere you went, so he definitely wouldn't care about you, who never wore any makeup or looked twice in the mirror before going out.

So you enjoyed some careless sex with Josh, and you enjoyed his friendship - you went to the movies together and he asked for advice on his career from you.

You two had agreed on going to a carnival, and he challenged you to climb the ferris wheel before the staff called the cops. It was fun to do these things on tour - you'd never see anyone from any town ever again.

But before that, you needed some footage of Queen's after parties, so Josh followed you around as you tried filming the band having fun, but the only one being more receptive was Roger. Surprisingly, there was no girls around him, but that was probably just him being smart - you could bet he sent home the midwestern girl he was going to fuck as soon as he saw the camera, not wanting to get caught cheating on his girlfriend.

Eventually you had enough footage and called it a day, and told Josh to go organize the footage before you left. "Are you coming with me to the room?" he asked. "No, I'm getting a drink. I didn't enjoy the free booze as much as I should have until now", you said, and he smiled in response before leaving.

"Y/N", you hear a too well-known voice say as you lean on the bar. Roger is walking towards you.

"Roger" you answered, and turned to ask for a drink. But Roger's hand on top of yours distracted you.

"Didn't thought I'd see you in an after party", he said, leaning into the bar as well. You've been this close to him before, but never without your camera between you. You were not used to see him like this, raw, with no viewfinder intermediating the rays of light between your eyes and his, your lips and his. It felt like a step closer to touching.

"What do you mean? I always come", you answer, trying to play it cool, as if you weren't moving your gaze from his eyes to his lips oftenly.

"Yeah, but you're always behind that goddamn camera of yours", he says, and looks at the space behind you, checking to see if you're alone. "And there's always your minion breathing behind your back", he tells you.

"Didn't thought you were watching me", you said, shrugging.

"It just feels fair, considering it's your job to watch me", he says, then looks to the rest of the party. "It's quite voyeuristic, if I may say so", he says, and you laugh.

"Never thought of my job with a sexual undertone before", you lie, tapping your fingers against the bar.

"Really? I actually started to enjoy the feeling of your eyes on me", he smirks, and you feel the blush on your cheeks. Touché.

"Just looking for a nice shot", you answer, looking away from him.

"That's a pity. I guess you're not interested in having a good time with me, then", it's his time to shrug.

"Define 'a good time'", you ask, and he smirks. You quickly think of Josh, waiting for you in your room, but a brief second - and a quick flash of Roger's smile - is all you need to shut the thought off.

"Open your mouth", Roger tells you, and you frown, confused. "Here?", you ask, and he laughs. "Yeah, here", he answers, looking for a small ziplock in his pocket. "Just trust me, alright?", he asks, and you open your mouth lightly.

"Tongue out", he tells you, and you do so. You watch as he picks up a small paper square with his fingertips. "Are you okay with it?", he asks, and you nod a yes.

So Roger's index soon touches the tip of your tongue, leaving the small piece of LSD there to dissolve. He quickly does the same, and calls the barman, ordering Perrier water, which the barman quickly pours in two glasses. Roger passes one of them to you, and raises his glass for a toast.

"A good time", he says, and you repeat it, receiving a quick smile from him before the two of you chug the water down.

It doesn't take very long before you can feel the effects on your body - lights get more intense, and time seemed to slow down a bit. You saw Roger's pupil dilate, and he pulled you to the dance floor.

His touch felt like lighting, electricity gluing your skins together, and he pulled you closer to the sound of Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood, the castanets looping on your brain, Roger's eyes turning completely blue, his hair shining like the sun, blinding you, and you just needed to dance because there was so much energy contained inside of you, and every time you felt him touching your skin, you felt more energy accumulating, and if you didn't dance it out, you would burst into spontaneous combustion.

Yet you needed to feel his skin against yours more and more, and you pulled him closer so could feel him, his smell, his saturated colors, and you ached for his touch, turning around and dancing with your back glued to him, his hand wrapping around your waist to keep you there, close, the loud music bonding you together, melting the two of you against each other, buzzing through the air.

"I fucking hate this song!!" Roger screamed into your ear, but you couldn't stop dancing for a second, so you kept moving, grinding your hips against his.

"Hey, c'mon, let's find my room so I can pick a decent song", Roger managed to say, his breath burning your skin, but you enjoyed the feeling and craved more of it, more of his touch.

"But I can't go somewhere quiet!", you told him, still dancing to the playlist full of shitty hits. "I'll sing to you", he said, and you considered, still dancing, now to Feels Like The First Time.

He started screaming the chorus, and that was good enough for you, so you followed him to the hall. You kept dancing maniacally as he tried to remember his floor, eventually being guided there by one of the crew members, trying to ask where his suite was as he sang high notes to the rhythm of the Foreigner song to keep you satisfied, dancing alone in the hallways.

Once you got to his suite, he turned the radio on, and Immigrant Song has just started. You both started screaming - his voice almost in harmony with Robert's voice coming through the radio - and he jumped into bed, offering you a hand so you could jump along. You did, and you jumped in bed, the water mattress squealing under your weight as you babbling the lyrics, random words coming out of your mouths about ice, snow, midnight suns and Valhalla.

It was followed by Dark Lady, and you kept jumping and screaming on his bed for hours to every song that the radio played, stopping only when you realized you were hoarse, the Stairway to Heaven intro giving you time to recover your breath.

Roger jumped out of bed to get you a bottle of sparkling water on his mini fridge, and you sat down, feeling the effect of the drug passing. He opened the bottle and had a sip before passing it to you. After giving him a weak smile, you drank half of the bottle in only a few seconds. He layed by your side.

You put the bottle down on the ground and lay down with him. His pupils are still big, but smaller than the last time you noticed, so the effect is getting weaker on him too.

That doesn't stop him from lifting his hand, moving it closer to your lips, his warm hand encompassing your cheek, his thumb brushing over your lower lip.

You don't resist the temptation, moving your own hand to his hair, his teased strands tickling your palm before you entangled your fingers on them.

He slowly pulls you closer to him, and you never saw the blue of his eyes in such close proximity.

Cause you were never this close to kissing him before.

And a glimpse of sobriety hits you - you're about to kiss Roger Taylor in the middle of an acid trip.

That's not how you want it to go; it doesn't feel right, now that you really thought about it.

"Roger, this is not right", you say, and he freezes. "It feels right to me", he says, staring deep into your eyes, relaxing, getting closer to you again.

"It's not that I don't want to kiss you, or sleep with you. I do", you blurp out, almost regretting it, scared of rejection even as he's leaning in for a kiss. "So what's not right?", he asks, frowning.

"I don't want to fuck you while we're tripping. It's gonna be fucking terrible", you say, and he laughs. "I mean it, though. I want it to be good. I'd rather not have you than have you like this", you tell him, and he laughs again.

"You're really that decided, aren't you?", he asks, and it's your turn to laugh. "I guess I am", you say.

"Since we're not fucking, or even kissing, can I still touch you? Your arms, your hair. I'm not tripping as hard, but my skin is itching. I need to touch you", he says, and you nod.

So, with Roger's callous fingers brushing against your soft skin and his husky voice humming Led Zeppelin, you fall asleep.

-

The sunlight makes you see red before you even open your eyelids.

You feel cold, the AC too strong for your liking - Josh wouldn't change the temperature, he knew how you liked it.

So you opened your eyes to find yourself on an empty bed, much bigger than yours. The only sound in the room comes from someone brushing their teeth.

Roger Taylor is only in a towel, wrapped low around his hips, leaning into the sink, his signature halo of hair now wet.

You let out a scream.

The memories from last night hit you at the same time he turns around and looks at you, concerned.

"Hey, you alright?", he asks, and you nod, feeling your legs ache from the exercise you had, jumping like mad for hours.

"Yeah, just couldn't remember everything at first", you said, and he looked down at himself. "Oh, don't worry. We didn't do anything. You had some interesting reasoning behind it", he said, and you blushed.

"Roger, I'm so sorry. All this has been so unprofessional, thank God there's not a show today", you say, and he interrupts you. "It's alright, Y/N. There would be nothing for you to do anyway, since I've spent the morning locked here", he said, and you gasped.

"All morning? What time is it?" you ask, and he points to the clock. "Three in the afternoon. Relax, you said it yourself, it's a day off", he shrugged, and went back to the sink.

"Josh is probably concerned with me, doesn't even know where I am", you murmured. "Is he your boyfriend or something?", he asked, and you nodded a no. "So there's no reason for all this. Besides, the whole crew probably saw you with me, so there's a huge chance he knows your whereabouts", Roger completed.

"God, and we didn't even do anything", you say, getting off bed. "I'm sorry for all this, Roger. I'll go to my room", you said, looking for your shoes. "God, I haven't had such an intense trip ever since Woodstock", you said to yourself, and Roger coughed. "Since when?" he asks, and you repeat, looking at him. "Woodstock", you say, proud, and he walks toward you.

"There's no way in hell you're getting out of this room without telling me this story", he said, and you smiled.

You told him about Woodstock, and the Beatles, only stopping so you could take a quick shower on his bathroom, putting on some of his clean clothes. He wanted your company, and you never realized how lonely he could get, never getting to know anyone who had a more interesting life than his.

He ordered room service for the two of you, a weird pizza full of pineapples, and you took it to his balcony, watching the twilight over the Badlands National Park, a breathtaking view you couldn't believe you were getting to experience, just like you couldn't believe you were experiencing listening to Roger Taylor complain about pineapple on his pizza. "I hate the Midwest so much. How can you fuck up pizza with fucking fruit? I expect this in California, not here", he complains, and you laugh at him.

He looks at you, and for a moment you see him as saturated as you saw last night, his blinding hair and deep blue eyes. "I have an idea", he says, putting his plate to the side and going inside the room.

He comes back with a Polaroid in his hands, and you instantly cover your face. "I don't like to be photographed, thanks", you say, but he kneels down in front of you, trying to get to the same level as your eyes.

"C'mon Y/N, it's just fair. You're filming me all the time!!" he complains, and you sigh. "That's my job, Roger".

"Hey, hey, it's fine", he says, moving your hands down and away from your face. "I just want to see you the way you see me", he tells you, positioning the camera so he can watch you through the viewfinder, his free hand moving a strand of your hair behind your ear.

"I just want to see you", he whispers, letting the camera slowly move down as he caresses your cheek with the hand that was on your hair.

He brushes his thumb over your lower lip again, and this time, you lean into him.

And even though you're sober, you could swear you feel the same electricity connecting you as his plump lips move against yours.

---

Permanent Taglist:

@taylorroger-s @secretsweetscollectionblog

Creatures of the Night Taglist:

@rogers-rhapsody  @six-bloodyminutes @x1975sos

[brakken-spideyverse]

Catching up on answers!

@pir0ripar0pirir0ra asked:

Do you work in Marvel or something? I would definitely buy that comics! :) Haha

Ha, believe me - you all would be the first to hear if I got a job at Marvel! No, for now this is all just for fun ^_^ But maybe someday.

Anon asked:

hey dude love this page, definitely the best redesigned universe around!! I was just wondering on your last stream we saw designs of Electro, Hulk, Cylcops and stuff will we ever see them and hear what they're about? thanks and keep up the amazing work

Yah, def wanna do up an Electro - maybe just the whole Sinister Six. And some more X-Men headshots, with some shorter ideas on them. I’ll see about streaming again sometime! And thank you!!

@corvoskk asked:

You mentioned using "Makeover-verse" as a temporary name; have you considered giving it an actual universe code like the canon multiverse? (like Earth-616, Earth-79203, Earth-1610, etc.)

Huh - this is something I have not thought about actually! 

Maybe Earth-3101 (or 131) to denote its anniversary date?

Anon asked:

hey i love your art and designs SO much!! i was wondering, is anyone in your verse gay? eyes emoji

Yep! Eddie is gay in this ‘verse

Anon asked:

this may be a weird question, but i was wondering if you had some ideas on how to use webbing in original ways besides peter's known way?? you always have the best concepts (ex: gwen using her webbing like a gymnast, which is my favorite btw)

Hmm, we see this a little bit in Into the Spider-Verse - but for a while I’ve been interested in how co-operative swinging would look as a fully fledged style. Like, one Spidey webs to a building while also webbed to a companion like a double pendulum - or both tethered to different points with arms clasped, or a web-line between them.

Something else that has always stuck with me is some dialogue from the first Spider-Man movie: “he throws up his hands, ropes come out, and he climbs up the ropes like a spider web.” That’s something I’ve really wanted to see explored more, especially on screen - much less a single tether feel and more a scattershot of webbing - short-range and less precise - occasionally used to yank himself forward, but also perhaps as little makeshift trampolines between buildings, or mini parachutes to soften a fall. Also picturing that in line with less OP wall-crawling. So on really glossy surfaces, he would have to shoot web onto them to be able to hold on. Ideas, ideas!

Anon asked:

Ok so Peter uses the standard swinging forms, and Gwen is more tether based, so what are Miles, Cindy, Anya, MJ as Spinneret, Spiderling, and Mayday's Spider-Girl swinging styles?

General thoughts are: Miles is just all the webs all the time - every webs. Cindy is a lot about web-zipping. Spiderling would take after her parents and probably uncle Miles too. Mayday, the web scramble.

Anon said:

hey i was just browsing your blog and saw that you headcanon gwen as asian! this is sappy as hell but i'm half chinese and have hc'd her as half chinese too since she's my favourite character but sorta figured nobody else would care to have her be any part asian so it's really nice to see someone else do so. love your art, thank you and have a great day!

Thank you! Glad that you responded to her positively ^_^

Anon asked:

Does Gwen have a Japanese name? Or translated version of her English name?

As far as I’ve planned, she’s still just called Gwen!

Anon asked:

Is your Jessica Drew Indian?

Jessica is black :)

Anon asked:

Hey there! I love this version of Spidey and his world so much. I was wondering if you have a version of Black Cat in the Makeover-verse?

Yes and hopefully she is coming soon! Thank you :)

@shorre said:

Hey I just found your blog and I wanted to say, as someone who is half Indian on my dads side and half white on my mom’s and whose also a huge spider-man fan with specific focus on Peter(love the other spider’s too of course but Peter will always be the one that resonates with me the most) the ethnicity change is very cool! I’m really happy I found your blog

Really appreciate this feedback, thank you! Glad he resonates with you <3

Anon said:

i love your anya redesign!! i’ve always hated how white-passing she looked in the comics so ty 💕

Thanks so much! I really like her too ^_^

Anon asked:

Any plans for the Daily Bugle and its cast of characters?

I have a sketch of Miss Brant in an old file somewhere - and yeah would wanna draw more of the bullpen including old JJJ sometime!

Anon asked:

Does your universe has a noir version of peter parker?

Nah, but I can def try a take on him at some point!

@avatarconner asked:

Do you have idea/prompt for how your Peter and MJ finally get together or are you not that far yet?

I have some ideas for this kicking around. Gonna have some more stuff unfold before I get to show you that though!

Anon asked:

Peter/MJ is a cool endgame, but how about a MJ/Gwen endgame?

Also valid <3

@bubstrik asked:

how do you make such dynamic poses for the spider ppl??

I tend to just throw spaghetti at the wall and see what sticks.

Literally. I literally throw wet noodles around. 

My home is a mess.

--

Thanks, everyone <3

[comicteaparty]

June 17th-June 23rd, 2019 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from June 17th, 2019 to June 23rd, 2019.  The chat focused on Heart of Keol by keiiii.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Week Long Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Heart of Keol by keiiii~! (https://www.heartofkeol.com/)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Remember, though, that while we allow constructive criticism, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic. Below you will find four questions to get you started on the discussion. However, a new question will be posted and pinned everyday (between 12:01AM and 6AM PDT), so keep checking back for more! You have until June 23rd to tell us all your wonderful thoughts! With that established, let’s get going on the reading and the chatting!

QUESTION 1. What has been your favorite scene in the comic so far? What specifically did you like about it?

QUESTION 2. Do you believe Danbi’s mom is at the Heart of Keol? If so, will she even want to see Danbi? If not, where else could she be? Overall, what consequences do you think Danbi will face in his attempts to reunite with his mother?

FeatheryJustice

1. My favourite scene so far from what I have read, is the toilet scene. Glowing toilet moss is the best part about it, who doesn't want to poop into the golden throne XD

AshAngelV

1. I'll have to come back to. 2. I'm bracing myself in case she's dead, or worse. Assuming death or worse doesn't happen, I think she'll be mad that he put himself in danger to find her, but also be glad to see him. I kinda don't think she's in the heart, and I'm sure his looking is going to cause all sorts of trouble for him and the rest of the party.

MJ Massey

I don't think she's dead, but I think something else happened to her that she isn't around anymore, like she went to another dimension or something

keii4ii

(hi everyone)

Tuyetnhi

hewwo~

oh ye, for no. 1...gotta rumminate lol. there's a ton of scenes I liked that I can't call out a favorite just yet lol

kayotics

1. I think I need to go back and reread since I feel like I read it all in a fever dream and went through it so quickly that it all meshed together, but I loved it a lot. I remember Ethan meeting the other earth person really well and loving her a lot, but I also remember liking the scenes with the train. There’s a lot of good scenes and they all pull different emotional chords.

Tuyetnhi

yee I agree

kayotics

2. If Danbi’s mom is there I’d gather that there’s something seriously wrong with the situation. But I think that Danbi’s mom will be at the heart. There’s a lot of themes about parents (lost parents, reuniting with parents, flawed parents) that I think she’ll be there but not what Danbi expects.

Delphina

1. Favorite scene: BIG KITTY HUGS https://www.heartofkeol.com/eng/025-14/

Kabocha

Aaaaah, that's definitely one of my favorite scenes... I honestly love the kitty hugs scene as well as the one that just finished: https://www.heartofkeol.com/eng/028-09/ When I saw this I needed to scream a little because it was just... like.. a "holy shit" moment. THAT EXPLAINS A LOT but now I am extremely worried for Ethan's emotional health :'D As far as Danbi's mom... I... dunno. I kind of had her written off as more of a motivation to start the trip, but not so much a part of the destination. I think she might be dead, or perhaps helping "preserve" Keol. ...So I don't think it's going to be a good meeting as far as "Wtf is going on" but a good meeting as far as seeing how people change when there's a long time.... especially if you think you know them. I'm seriously torn though -- I think whatever's happened to her, we're going to get a hint about it, and it's gonna come from Lu. And it's gonna compound the heartbreak that I see coming on the horizon...

Desnik

Oh I really love this one, but there's a page I remember that has this awesome use of 3-point perspective to insinuate a spiritual journey from one plane to another, let me see if I can find it again

RebelVampire

QUESTION 3. At the moment, who is your favorite character? What about that character earns them this favor?

QUESTION 4. Who or what is the red hoodie kid, and what is their connection to Ethan? What might they have to do with Ethan’s latent Dokkabi powers? What is the significance of their facial mark give it matches the queen’s?

MJ Massey

Crack theory on red hoodie kid they're Ethan's dad from the past but that is probably not at all correct

RebelVampire

1) My favorite scene is the one where Ethan princess carries Lu away from all the octopus being cooked. I enjoy it was partly just hilarious seeing Ethan's overreaction, but also emotionally significant for Lu cause Lu got to see how much the giant doofus cares for him. 2) I think Danbi's mom was at the Heart but is there no longer. And i think Danbi will end up meeting someone who knew his mom instead of his mom directly. Frankly I assume she is dead and that Danbi is gonna have to go through the emotional trainwreck of accepting that the trip and everything he went through was for nothing except for answers. And while I'm sure Danbi will try to play it off as if just the closure is fine, I really don't think it will be. I think it'll be this bottled up thing that eventually explodes into an emotional mess that needs janitors to clean up.

RebelVampire

3) Lushaka. He is a giant cat. I really don't need to say anymore. Cats are best. 4) Assuming Ethan's dad was in Keol and an illegal Dokkabi as was implied, I think the red hoodie kid is a manifestation of the wyrm that the dad ate. And that it somehow passed to Ethan cause there is no illegal Dokkabi lore that says this isnt possible yet. So Ethan always had the powers, he just could never use them. As for the facial marking, I think it's just a mystical symbol of the wyrm's power. And the queen has it cause she was just a super good dokkabi all along or something.

kayotics

3. My fav is Lushaka, but it’s because he’s kind of emotionally constipated and is trying to not show he has feelings and I love characters like that.

4. I’m not much of a theorizer, but if I remember right, there was mention of a king that was supposed to appear? My initial thought on that information was that the kid was the upcoming king

MJ Massey

I think Ethan is my favorite. He's not what I would have expected as a main character for this kind of story, but that's what I really love. And he also has a good heart. He's someone I'd want to be friends with

keii4ii

Emotional constipation and emotional mess janitors... giving a whole new meaning to The Shining Outhouse (HoK's discord server name)

kayotics

Keiiii, I gotta tell you I love emotionally constipated characters

NeilKapit

Great choice for this week. I’ll re-read Keol from the beginning to discuss it properly.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 5. What has been your favorite illustration in the comic so far? What specifically about it do you like?

QUESTION 6. What do you think Adela will do given she just narrowly escaped from hunters? Additionally, who is the woman who saved Adela, and what could she possibly want from her? How will this tie into the rest of the story?

AshAngelV

5. I've really liked the illustrations of Ethan's soulscape (I guess is what you'd call it). They combine Keii's glowy magics with deep symbolism and heartbreaking moments (like when the stump burns). So many levels of epic.

keii4ii

Both of my favorite scenes have not been drawn yet due to Webcomic Time™. But one of them is actually coming up very soon! I'm drawing a set of scenes that lead directly up to it. Among the scenes that have been drawn/posted, I like this one... not so much as a favorite scene, but more like, "this is what HoK is about." https://www.heartofkeol.com/eng/013-04/ And the whole of chapter 25-26, especially Danbi's reaction here. https://www.heartofkeol.com/eng/026-06/ I guess the common thread there is the weaving of love and deep, bitter let-down.

(Just noticed "common thread" and "weaving" ... Pun not intended )

NeilKapit

As I’m reading through it it’s off to a great start. A lot of subtle character works that’s showing not telling, hinting at Ethan’s troubles.

snuffysam

5) Illustrations I like - any time magic gets used, specifically Dokkabi magic. The way the colors play off each other, the way the lighting affects the scene, and the amount of character that gets revealed through the form of the magic... it's all incredible.

surfKraken

Recently I've reread HoK after following it since it showed up on Tapas, and it's a rock solid favorite.

I guess what I like is it's originality #1

and #2 that it moves at its own pace and does its own thing.

I know that sounds generic but that's the best I can do after just getting home from a long day☁️

I don't have the energy to type all the feelings I have about the characters and presentation lol

They are as good as it gets for me in webcomics. there!

Tuyetnhi

5) ahhh I have to say Lu's tenticles lmao. I was caught off gaurd when he just woosh them out. I also like how they're rendered. but I do agree with snuffysam about the magic displayed and used in various instances.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 7. Which characters do you enjoy seeing interact the most? What about their dynamic interests you?

QUESTION 8. Why do you think the queen is hunting for Elyeo and locking them up? Is it for their own good, or is something sinister going on? What might this have to do with her destined mate who is supposedly a red-haired, male Elyeo?

RebelVampire

5) https://www.heartofkeol.com/eng/021-05/ The big second to last panel on this page. I love the lighting and the poses and the details like Ethan's body hair. everything comes together to create a really intimate moment that makes me squee. Especially the lighting though. Like even though Ethan and Lu had special moments between them before, this was the moment that made me tear up on the inside. 6) my crack theory is that its Danbi's mom disguised somehow. And she just magically sense Adela knew where her son is. my more serious theory is that the lady also wants to go to the heart and needs a guide. And ya know, clearly Adela knows the way. Which I think inevitably that's the path. Everyone gotta go to the heart for a "happy" reunion where there will be no drama and everyone will just have tea and cake. happy happy rainbows.

7) Ethan and Lu cause they are the OTP. Cause every part I'm like "how will you should you care about each other this time." and then I'm surprised and cry on the inside. 8) I think the queen has basically gotten impatient and lonely. And now that she knows her mate is a male Elyeo, shes keeping all Elyeo's to watch for his birth. So basically she has a little sinister breeding facility going on.

keii4ii

Been loving reading everyone's thoughts so far! @kayotics mentioned that there's a lot of themes about parents, and it's true! For many characters, a parent is the one person you can expect to love you even when the rest of the world is going bad/crazy. Messing with that expectation, uprooting it, seeing what grows from where it was uprooted... That's a big part of the story. @Delphina I'm so happy to see love for that scene! I think that was where I started feeling more clear-headed about the story. Like the story finally found itself. Maybe not at that exact point, but somewhere around there. @Kabocha Extreme worries for Ethan's emotional health is 100% justified at this point in the story. The characters are gonna run straight through a busy 8-lane highway, metaphorically, and only Lushaka is aware of it. He's hoping they can make it without getting hit by a car........

@Desnik Oooh did you mean this page? https://www.heartofkeol.com/eng/001-04a/ @MJ Massey I can TOTALLY see you and Ethan getting along splendidly!

Kabocha

With the current page that's gone up since chat started... I am screaming. I don't think lu laughing really portends anything good at this point. Aaaaaa But I'm looking forward to seeing the emotional traffic jam that occurs.

keii4ii

Lu worries about cars and trucks, then a freaking Boeing 777 comes crashing onto that highway

...maybe

Kabocha

... oh no. So what you're saying is we're going to end up with the emotional version of that plotline of ghost whisperer, where nobody involved in the emotional 777 realizes that's what happened, so they're trying to be all normal but nothing is right and they're all a wreck

RebelVampire

QUESTION 9. What sorts of art or story details have you noticed in the way the comic is crafted that you think deserves attention?

QUESTION 10. Why do you think the Xi people are so mistreated? Given the dangers, is Ethan’s sympathy warranted, or do you believe he should be more careful? How might all this play a role as the group gets closer to the Heart of Keol?

AshAngelV

Ugh, missed most of the week cause brain dead from work. 9. Keii's use of reflections in eyes is on point and adds a subtle layer to deep scenes. 10. Probably a mix of racism and longstanding grudges. And I think Ethan should be more careful in general. Dude is way too nice/trusting for his own good. It'll probably cause conflict between him and Lu cause Lu is the exact opposite and might end up getting frustrated.

RebelVampire

9) I really love the body hair, I gotta say. Cause usually that's something left out with more painterly styles like this, and yet it's there and I can tell exactly what it is. And I just appreciate that the time is taken to add it in even when it doesn't necessarily add anything to the scenes in question. 10) Probably the age ol' tale of one person did something bad, whole group got blamed, rinse and repeat until everyone hates everyone. Ethan 1000% needs to be more careful. His sympathy is admirable, but it's gonna get him stabbed in the butt. There is just too much hate and past history, and it's gonna take more than Ethan's kindness to overcome that. Cause I don't think Ethan will figure out he needs to earn their trust until it's much too late and just kind of think being kind is enough. As for the Xi people's overall role, I think as they get closer to the heart, they're gonna be in more danger. But more than the risk of danger, I think Ethan is going to be changed and want to talk to the queen or something. And say hey, stop being a dick. And then the queen will be like, who tf are you strange giant man.

MJ Massey

9. keiiii is such a master of light but I also enjoy how her impressionistic brush strokes bring patterns to life as well. Each frame is a masterpiece. I was lucky enough to win a wall scroll from her and it's one of my favorite art pieces I have at home

Desnik

@keii4ii yup!! thats the one

NeilKapit

OK, the Unofficial Voice Casting for Heart of Keol

Ethan is Patrick Seitz

Danbi is Susan Dailan

Lushaka is Liam O’Brian

Hana is Cristina Vee

RebelVampire

QUESTION 11. What do you think are this particular comic’s strengths? What do you think makes this comic unique? Please elaborate.

QUESTION 12. Do you believe the assumptions are correct that Ethan’s dad had been to Keol and was an illegal Dokkabi? If not, what is your alternate theory? If so, how will this revelation affect Ethan’s well-being both physically and emotionally?

AshAngelV

11. Beautiful glowy magics and just under the surface tension/feelings that pop out and murder you emotionally. 12. I do think that's the case. And it could be that it'll send him looking for the piece of his father that didn't come home. (In a literal or metaphorical way.) It'll probably call this world into question, because what kind of world calls his father a criminal? Also it confirms that it is possible to return, but then what if it damages his mind the way his father's was. So, I imagine it'll wreck Ethan emotionally, which then would activate the magic potentially harming him physically.

Respheal

I'm finally catching up so I can answer questions (busy week aaaaaaaa) but the scene with the rainbow right after the Two Fools in the Rain chapter ends......In my heart of hearts I'm hoping Lu is purring so hard in that scene

"I'm not a housecat. -purrrrrr purrrrrrr-"

AshAngelV

Some big cats do pur.

Respheal

ah ha okay I'm caught up now 1. I'm a total sucker for two things: isekai, and characters with hidden powers. HoK tickles those both, BUT it approaches them from an original angle. For one, a significant portion of the world is also a newcomer to the world, so that's neat, and then the hidden powers aren't like.....the big deal. They're more spice in the curry that is the story. That said, I really enjoyed the calming down Ethan part of the train scene because on one hand, hidden powers get hyped and on the other it was one of the first definite "Awwww" moments between Lu and Ethan

2. Heck I have no idea anymore. I just can't even guess at this point xD 3. Ethan? Probably??? He's just a good wholesome boy, and he needs a hug :') 4. aaaaaaaaaaaa I don't knoooooow I had guesses but they keep going out the window so at this point I'm just along for the ride xD I thought the kid might've actually been the queen at one point but I don't know anymore

5. -croaks- so many? The opening illustration is gorgeous so that's one way to start a comic xD Keii4ii's lighting has been phenomenal throughout(edited)

everything is so glowy and shiny

12. And yeah, the idea of Ethan's dad having been to Keol? Hold up. If that's true, I guess that means the gates aren't one-way after all, so that has some interesting implications for Ethan's potential return home in the future (will he take that option if it becomes available? Good question ) But also...I don't think it would impact Ethan's opinion of him all that much? It wasn't what happened to his family, it's that it happened at all, and the way it impacted them. Although yeah for sure it has some scary possibilities for Ethan's own well being if he can't control the Dokkabi power But he's got Lu so it'll be alright.....right?

keii4ii

aaaaaaa

Summary of my feelings:

AshAngelV

Lol

Not really sure what emotion is associated with tentacles.

keii4ii

One way to interpret the tenta is wiggly

AshAngelV

Haha

NeilKapit

Just occurred to me that Heart of Keol is an isekai, even though it predates that genre’s recent surge in popularity

It’s much better than most of what I’ve seen in that anime genre, since the characters are much more complicated and authentic

It’s a story involving a troubled young man spirited away to an alternate fantasy world that prompts him to work through his problems while trying to find his way back

Though I suppose stranger in a strange land stories are far, far, FAR older

keii4ii

Thank you! Yeah, I think HoK is only technically an isekai. While it fits the definition, it doesn't fit the expectations, for better or worse. And it wasn't because I was trying to make "an isekai... but different!" I just made the story the way I saw it, and the similarities as well as differences are kinda coincidental.

The story is what it is.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 13. What are you most looking forward to in the comic? Also, do you have any final thoughts to share overall?

QUESTION 14. Why do you think the Hornets are interested in Danbi? Do you think Lushaka will be able to go through with his betrayal? How will this betrayal affect his growing relationship with Ethan?

ShaRose49

I think maaaybe Danbi is more powerful than he seems? Or maybe there’s another reason they’re interested in him, maybe it has to do with his mother. I’m just spitballing here. I just wanna say that the art for this comic is breathtaking, and danbi’s expressions are so soft and gentle

AshAngelV

13. I'm looking forward to Ethan finding out his Dad was in Keol. Not sure if it's excitement, or dread, though. Lol 14. I think it has something to do with the future king. I don't think Lu would be able to go through with it if it'd obviously hurt Ethan, but if he thought he could get away with it, he might. If he were to kill Danbi and Ethan found out about it, I think that'd end their relationship completely.

Jonny Aleksey

I've just read through every 2019 update. I've most definitely missed important stuff but I really wanted to participate in CTP seeing as I keep missing it. 1. Ch27-9. Post hair cutting. It looks beautiful. Such amazing angles for such an emotional scene. This is a mark of a good comic. They art told me the gravity of what happened even thou I didn't know much about the hair situation. 2. The flashback said that hair dye doesn't work on Danbi's mom so unless she can hide, it's unlikely. Might even lead to an emotional gut-punch. 3. I like Ethan. I guess I like semi-clueless but heartwarming goofs . Also he's from Jersey. That's pretty cool.

Jonny Aleksey

5. Probably Ch27-9 again. The angle and detail is great but it's probably the colors. This comic's bright colors are eye candy. 8. Again, only going from the 2019 pages it seems Elyeo Father King legend is very important to this city, but they seem to hate the blue haired people. Maybe they're hoping to find the next King to get rid of the people they hate/afraid of. Seems like a villain thing to do (if the Queen is a villain that is) 9. I've noticed that red and blue are colors that aren't seen on people but they appear together often in the environment. Not sure what that means but those colors do seem to be important. 11. If I hadn't made it clear, the colors are a huge strength but I think it wouldn't be as good if it wasn't for the storytelling. 28-6 and 28-7 are best examples as this is essentially just two people talking but each panel is unique and flows well so I wasn't bored. The facial emoting is good too tho a few full front faces are strange.

12. Ethan's "dad" in the flashback is wearing an army uniform which I find interesting. I'm not sure where Koel is (I'm sure it's explained in the previous chapters),, it's clearly an Asian aesthetic. Maybe there'll be some Korean War allusions, hinting at some reason the US would be there. I admit it going out there for theories but it's something I thought about.

Jonny Aleksey

13. Seeing Ethan was my favorite character I do want to see what his dad (if it even is him) is like. I did really like what I read because of the art and somber tone. What I read seemed like a down time in the story, a slow burn; so I'm excepting something intense to happen. Maybe someone finds out Danbi is whatever he is and it leads to a chase sequence.

RebelVampire

11) The illustrations. This comic strikes a good balance between painterly and detail that gives it really unique imagery among contemporary comics. In particular, though, the lighting. This comic is a great example of what can happen for your comic when you do lighting really well, cause it creates such much atmosphere you almost choke on it (in the good way). 12) Yes, I do believe Ethan's dad was in Keol. That was my guess even before more recent pages inserted more of the implication. There's too many connected dots for it not to be the case, honestly. XD As for its affect on Ethan, I think at first it's gonna be confusion. Cause I doubt his dad ever mentioned Keol, and I doubt being in Keol explained all his dad's behaviors. Then honestly, probably the 5 stages of grief. So denial it was what happened, angry that nobody magically knew about Keol or something, bargaining that his dad could be fixed from the insight, depression that nothing would be the same like Ethan hoped for, and acceptance that at least there are answers to be had and it makes more sense as to why he got summoned to Keol. Which that last one I think is the one that will hit him teh hardest emotionally. That he is there for a reason and it's not just a coincidence.

13) Lu and Ethan and their continually growing relationship (that I swear I will cry over if their relationship is forever ruined.) 14) Honestly? I just assumed it's some half-baked schemes to defy the queen and keep the king from showing up. Or something like that. Like I really got the impression from the whole reveal scene with Lu is the Hornets really arent thinking their plans through that well and/or are at least poorly organized. I think Lu is gonna have second thoughts and bail for Ethan's sake. And while Ethan is passionate enough to forgive, I think Ethan is gonna find himself in a rock and hard place. Cause Danbi I don't think will forgive Lu. Not after the previous lie Lu told and shit. So Ethan is probably gonna get hurt more by being putting into a situation where he has to choose between helping his giant cat love and helping the dude who first helped him when he arrived and somewhat owes a life debt to.

keii4ii

I super appreciate all the comments here! In the past, some people told me how the art is the only good thing about the comic, haha. I used to get really down about that. It's great to see that you guys appreciate the art not just because it looks pretty, but also because it serves the story. I'm here to tell the story, after all!

Also very happy to see some love for Ethan and Lu's relationship

keii4ii

I'm looking forward to showing all the heartbreaks and their aftermaths (which hopefully include healing and growth)

There's gonna be a lot of worldbuilding info and plotty-ness, like what the Hornets are trying to do and why, but in this story, ultimately all of that is just context for the emotional development.

keii4ii

Also @ the correct and partially correct theories, despite the scarcity of information in the comic so far... I'm not a theorizer myself as a reader, so I'm amazed when people can come up with solid theories!

Even the ones that are going to be proven otherwise have good thought behind them!

ShaRose49

I can give you some constructive criticism if you’d like—though I only read like, 50+ pages and I’m much more of a newb than you are @keii4ii Just some little things I’ve noticed

But I don’t wanna sound like a smartass either it is certainly good quality overall

keii4ii

What kind of constructive criticism are we talking? Like, what topics/areas?

ShaRose49

Probably mostly with the character development

But I can be bad at explaining things

Like I’m bad with words I mean sometimes

keii4ii

Generally speaking, I think "this didn't work for me because [reason]" is pretty down to earth and non-snobby. It acknowledges subjectivity, and accepts that it might work just fine or even great for other readers

ShaRose49

Yeah, something like that! It might help, might not, but you never know

keii4ii

like in the past I... even ran into someone who not only said my writing was bad, but also unintentionally insulted people who liked my story by saying something to the effect of "no one who's looking for a good story would read this."

ShaRose49

Yah that’s dumb, like you can’t speak for every person lol

keii4ii

Also are we talking the first 50 pages?

ShaRose49

Yeah around that—probably more, but I haven’t read all of it, that’s for sure

keii4ii

Okay, what's the thing that didn't work for you? (don't give me like a whole List of All the Bad Things You Did, I don't want to be overwhelmed )

ShaRose49

Yeah don’t worry I get overwhelmed too

So I think one of your biggest strengths is worldbuilding—you’ve built an incredibly detailed and unique world with Keol. So if people are into rich, fantasy worlds, they’d probably adore this story. However I find that we know very little about almost all of the character’s personal lives? They have a few interesting quirks, but it still felt hard for me to connect with any characters because we only see very brief and vague flashbacks of their struggles and whatnot

keii4ii

Oh, I think that auto-resolves

ShaRose49

For me, personally, the characters are usually why I read the story or why I don’t. But it does seem like they’ll get more interesting eventually, it’s just taking awhile I guess

keii4ii

This is a very slow burn story, and the character development isn't meant to hit you like a fire hose.

ShaRose49

Yeah That’s fair. I didn’t mean something super obvious, but perhaps a little more clarity with at least one of the characters might’ve been good, but no worries that’s bound to improve

I can somewhat relate to Ethan having a relative who is so ill they’re almost not the same person anymore. My grandparents on my dad’s side had/have dementia which can be hard and sad

keii4ii

What I'm wondering is what anyone even likes about the worldbuilding in the early chapters It doesn't seem special to me, lol (and this isn't self depreciation; it's not bad, it just is to me.)

kayotics

Speaking as a reader who also likes strong characterization: heart of Keol is very slow burn, but I find that the characters are very rich, just in super nuanced ways

ShaRose49

Oh my gosh, the world you’ve created is so unique! It feels like dreams I’ve had

keii4ii

like I know some people who were interested because it was Asian fantasy that wasn't Japanese for once, but that's not special to me. I'm Korean, I consume Korean media, and I am very used to seeing Korean settings.

ShaRose49

I only have experience with some Korean media, and that’s mostly drama webcomics

keii4ii

I guess though, not every Korean fantasy is as glowy as HoK!

ShaRose49

The world is probably the best part for me so far

I just love the portal thingy

keii4ii

@kayotics Thank you! Nuance is something very important to me

snuffysam

Yeah the characters are my favorite part of the comic. Especially how the relationship between Ethan and Lu develops. In fact, that's my answer to (13). I want to see where that relationship goes. If Ethan finds out about Lu's... shadier outings, how will he handle it? Stuff like that.

keii4ii

Every character's gonna need a special anti-breaking armor for their heart. . . .

NeilKapit

OK, I’m caught up on HoK from start to finish, I’ll start work on the questions

Treating this like an old school assignment because I want to do this right

keii4ii

btw there might be a couple more pages to read on the main site, if you're reading on Comic Fury!

NeilKapit

1.) The recent scene with Ethan and Lushaka, where Lushaka comforts Ethan as he’s recounting his father’s mental illness and the harassment they both got for it, definitely stands out

keii4ii

(Thank you for reading, Neil and everyone. I appreciate this!)

NeilKapit

2.) I’m not sure where Danbi’s mom is and what she’s doing right not and what she thinks of Danbi; honestly I don’t tend to try and predict these large scale mysteries, because anything I come up with as a reader would ultimately be less than what the writer will surprise me with, and I don’t want that surprise poisoned for me by not living up to my “head Canon”

3.) Lushaka, whose personality can be described like a good steak— tough outside, tender inside. Always a fan of A.) cats and B.) stoics, and he’s certainly both. How he’s gone so far with the disfiguring wounds on his feet is impressive but also makes me feel bad for him, on top of everything else he’s been through.

4.) See #2....wherever I think this story is going with all the plot threads set up won’t be as good as the reality. I can say that the twist about Ethan’s dad having visited Keol was shocking, but in a good way since it connected a lot of things

5.) Too many to count, but I did bust out laughing in the Q&A section with Ethan in a dating sim. Some of the scenes with the new woman with the dreads showing off her powers by balancing multiple falling objects at once were especially impressive.

And, at risk of sounding like a broken record, tiger mode Lushaka comforting Ethan

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- WEEK LONG BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Heart of Keol this week! Please also give a special thank you to keiiii for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Heart of Keol, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

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