#anyways im talking to an empty crowd | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

todayisawthewhxlewxrld · 1 year ago

Text

REPEATING OVER AND OVER, AND OVER, UNTIL YOU MAKE IT TILL THE END!

YOU'LL NEVER BE ALONE AGAIN!

synopsis// both of you stuck in a time loop until you can accept each other. you can not make it out alone no matter how hard you try.

pairing// katsuki bakugo x gn!reader

word count// 9.6k

contents// no quirks, angst, fluff ?, they r idiots, slow burn-ish? at least at first, profanity. like a lot. i stg they cuss every other sentence, it’s like i was a middle school boy who just discovered cuss words writing this, ooc bakugo probably, ages aren’t specified but they r adults, pure cringe but its mha and coming from me so did u expect anything different..?

notes// my last mha draft... im finally free.... anyway i wrote this ages ago but i rlly love this and it may or may not have been inspired by a fnaf song..... (it totally was)

You wake up with a gasp, sitting up quickly to find everything in the room in the same place it was the last hundred times you woke up.

“A-fucking-gain?!”

You throw your legs over the side of your bed and reach for your phone, hoping for something different but getting nothing. There are no notifications, no services, and no matter how long you stare at the time, it never changes. You would know considering you’ve done this routine a hundred times. You throw your phone back onto the nightstand and slip your shoes on, the repetitiveness of it all making your head spin. You’ve got to be going insane; what other logical explanation could there be for reliving the same day over and over again?

"I don't know what I did to piss the universe off, but now it's pissing me off," you mumble as you walk out of your empty house—you'd know because you've checked every nook and cranny for the past hundred times. The minute you step outside, you shout at the air, the sky, the universe, the gods, whatever put you here, “Is this what you wanted? pay back? You fucking got it!”

You stand there half hoping that something would happen, whether someone appeared or a voice would say something to you, but nothing; it’s just complete silence apart from the wind whooshing by. though that’s not to say people weren’t here. If you went far enough into the city, there were crowds of people walking around with no destinations; they seemed like NPCs. The only difference is that you can interact with NPCs, whereas the shells of humans you see in town don't talk, at least not to you. They don't even acknowledge you. It’s almost as if you’re a ghost, which is ironic considering how, when you were alive—no, that's not the right word, sentient maybe? Whatever the point is, when you were a productive member of society, you longed for something exactly like this. To slip by people like the wind, like a ghost, yet now that you have it, you wish for anything but this.

"God, if this is what the afterlife is like, I don't plan on dying anytime soon,” you mutter to yourself as you walk deeper into the city. “Maybe this is the afterlife? or maybe this is hell.”

You stare at your feet as you walk until you hit the point where there are empty husks of humans walking past, and at this point you lift your head, starting to wave at them and standing directly in front of them in a futile attempt to get their attention. Of course it serves to be useless when they walk right past you... just like they have the last hundred times you’ve tried. After a few more futile attempts, you begin walking past them toward a forest. This has been your routine for the entire time you've been trapped here, wherever here may be.

You check your home, walk outside, curse a higher being and ask what you've done to deserve this, contemplate life—or lack thereof?, walk into the city, try to catch someone's attention, and when that doesn't work, you walk off into the forest, spending the whole day there— or you would if time worked properly here—and eventually finding yourself at some random, poorly placed door deep into the forest. You stand right in front of the door; it mocks you, and you imagine yourself tearing it to shreds if it weren't for the fact that the minute you touch it, you're back at square one. You opt to sit in front of the door, just merely studying it; it’s not like there's really much else for you to do.

You don’t know how long you just sit there going back and forth between staring at the door and tearing out the grass from under your hands; had time worked properly here, you’re sure that the moon would have been out by now. You finally admit defeat—for the hundredth time. You stand up and wipe your hands clean of the dirt now laid upon them before you look around the door once more, hoping for something new to appear behind it or beside it, but nothing—the only thing behind the door is more empty forest. So with a sigh, you begrudgingly touch the door handle, and you immediately find yourself waking up with a gasp, sitting up quickly, with everything in the room in the same place it was the last hundred times you woke up again.

This time, though, you don't get up immediately; you lay back down in your bed with a sigh, pulling your blanket up to your chin. You’ve always been alone. This wasn't new to you, but at least before it was your choice. It wasn’t like people didn’t want to be your friend; you just didn’t want to be theirs. In some fucked-up way, you saw your hyper-independence as superior to how other people seemed to need and want friends. but now? Now you want nothing more than to be annoyed by your coworker; you want nothing more than to walk outside and run into someone who will acknowledge you; even if it isn't a positive interaction, it's still an interaction. and after being stuck here for ages, you would kill for an interaction. You throw your blanket off of you as you begin your routine, finally having enough of your pity party.

Check phone? Check.

Put your shoes on? Check.

Search every inch of your house? Check.

Step outside and curse the universe? Check.

Find yourself surronded by people where you cant tell if you’re the ghost here or if they are? Check! Wait—Is that a new person?

You've been here long enough to have memorized or at least vaguely remembered every single person in the crowd, but this new face in the distance isn't one you've seen before; it's unique, you'd remember it, so who is this? Is this a sign your time here is coming to an end? In a frenzy, you push your way through the crowd, ignoring all your thoughts. You stop a few feet in front of him; he’s still a bit away as you study him. His brow furrowed in a scowl, and he's muttering something under his breath that you can't quite make out, but you can tell he's frustrated by his facial expression and the way his hands are curled into tight fists at his side, knuckles paper white at this point.

He finally reaches you but ignores you as he walks past you, and you sigh, wondering why you thought he'd be the one to acknowledge you.

you frown, mumbling aloud to yourself in disappointment, “Do I really need any more NPCs here?”

suddenly though, he stops dead in his tracks like he heard you and he turns around to face you. Holy shit, he heard you?

“What the fuck did you say to me?”

You stare at him blankly before looking to the sides of you and even behind you. “Uh, are you talking to me?”

He looks at you like you’re stupid as he takes a few steps toward you, and subconsciously, you take a few back. “Of course I'm talking to you; who the fuck else would I be talking to?”

You put your hands out in front of you in a stop motion briefly, your face scrunching up in disdain. "Chill the fuck out, asshole, it was just a question."

“Chill the fuck out?” He repeats in disbelief and takes another step forward, while you stand still, tensing up to appear tougher. “I'm stuck in some weird ass place where, up to this point, no one except for your dumbass has even acknowledged me and you’re telling me to chill the fuck out?”

You roll your eyes at his outburst and ask curiously, “You just got here, didn’t you?”

“What the hell do you think? Where even are we?”

"A time loop of some sort,” you say nonchalantly as you shrug, though everything you’re feeling right now is anything but nonchalance.

He scoffs. “Time loop? You expect me to believe that stupid shit?”

You narrow your eyes at him. “Believe what you want, either way, you’re still stuck here, idiot.”

“Oh, Im the idiot for getting stuck here? What about you?”

“Me?” you scoff.

“You seem like you’ve been here longer than I have, and you’re still not out. So who’s the real idiot?”

You cross your arms and look away, grumbling, “Maybe I like it here.”

He looks you up and down before rolling his eyes and shoving his hands in his pockets. “Yeah, I doubt that.”

Your gaze returns to him with a glare. “Fuck you, I was going to help you.”

“I don't need your fucking help,” he sneers. "You obviously have no idea what the fuck you're doing in the first place."

You walk away, flipping him off, and he does the same, both of you going your separate ways. Though once you hit the edge of the forest, you turn to look back and see if he’s anywhere near, but it’s like he never existed at all. back to the routine.

Enter the forest and walk for an unreasonable amount of time? Check.

Reach the out of place, uncanny door deep in the forest? Check.

Stare at it and imagine ripping it to shreds until it's nothing but dust? Check.

Finally sit down and accept your fate for a bit? Check.

You sigh as you poke at the dirt, the patches of grass you pulled out last time returning to normal as if you had never ripped them out in the first place. Remember what you said earlier about wishing for human interaction? You changed your mind after meeting that random guy, who quickly reminded you why you disliked it in the first place. Although you’ve made up your mind about hating him, you can't help but wonder what he’s doing here in the first place. Obviously, you have no idea why you’re here either, but why did he just pop up after doing this a hundred times or more already? Why is he the only one who can suddenly acknowledge your existence? Maybe there was a glitch in your eternal hell; maybe this was an accident, and he’d be gone by the time you did this all over again. Back to the routine.

Stand up and clean your hands of dirt? Check.

Touch the door handle and wake back up in your bed with a gasp? Check!

You groan and grip your head slightly; the action of being in one place only to suddenly be in another never fails to give you a slight headache. Today, you go through your routine quickly in order to get into the city faster. You want to know if he's still here so badly that you almost seem desperate. much to your dismay, and his—he’s still here and groans at the sight of you.

"What the fuck did you do?" he demands angrily.

You narrow your eyes at him. You regret coming here. “excuse me?”

“One minute I'm walking, and the next I'm back here."

“It’s called a time loop for a reason, idiot.”

“I don't fucking care what it’s called, just stop doing it," he snaps.

“Oh yeah, like I fucking control that! Let me just stop this whole time loop while we’re at it, huh?”

He says nothing; he merely flips you off and walks away, and you do the same.

Just like every other time you find yourself back at the door in the forest, this time you don’t wait to touch it; you immediately go for the handle and restart the time loop in spite of him snapping at you. He comes into your time loop and has the audacity to complain? No one told him to invade your eternal hell. The first handful of days (if you could even call them that) go the exact same way. Wake up, check phone, slip on shoes, check house, curse the universe some more, go into the crowd, argue with the blond-haired boy who seemed to piss you off beyond words, go your separate ways, go into the forest, find the door, think about tearing down said door, sit on the floor for a bit, and then finally go to touch the door only to do it all over again.

The next handful of days were similar, except you and the invader of your eternal hell eventually stopped arguing; you two still acknowledged each other, but only with a scowl and a flip of your middle fingers, walking straight past each other to do your own thing. You can't say you were upset with the arrangement because at least you didn't have to listen to his whining any longer. You just hated how something was added to the time loop yet it seems like nothing has changed at all. you're still stuck, and the door still won't budge. What exactly are you even supposed to be doing? How do you escape? Can you even escape?

You wake up with a gasp for what now seems like the thousandth time, and you're starting to feel the effects of being here for so damn long. You’re exhausted, your bones ache, and you feel like you could drop dead at any moment. Then again, who’s to say you aren’t already dead? You lazily go through your routine; everything is as it should be until you get into the city. The crowds are still there, but someone is missing. The only person who has acknowledged you is missing. Part of you is happy that he’s gone; it’s not like you two have had a productive conversation in the time he's been there; if anything, he was hindering your escape. but the other part?

The other part is a tad bit disappointed, for two reasons. that one, he managed to get out before you, and two, you’re all alone again. As you begin walking toward the forest, you groan. Who cares? It’s not like you needed him or wanted him here anyway; you could get out on your own. Sometime lost in thought, you finally made it to the entrance of the forest, stopping and resting against a tree. You wonder if the longer you stay, the worse you start to deteriorate, like whatever this place is doesn’t want you here in the first place. You frown, it’s not like you want to be here anymore than this place wants you here; you didn’t ask to get stuck in some stupid ass time loop.

“I’ve had enough of your games! let me out!” You scream into the woods, half expecting someone to respond, and someone does.

“Do you have to be so loud?” A deep voice comes from beside you, tone full of annoyance.

You jump slightly as you turn your head to the side to see the owner of the voice, and you’re almost disappointed to see it’s the blond boy with a permanent scowl and jaw clenched tight.

“What the fuck, you’re still here?” You ask breathlessly, still trying to calm your racing heart from his slight jumpscare.

He rolls his eyes and leans against a nearby tree to mimic you. “Where the fuck else would I have gone?”

"I thought you got out or something..."

"Clearly not," he says, tsking. “What is this?”

“A forest. What does it look like, idiot?”

“No shit, I mean, why are we here?”

You stare at him as blankly as your voice comes out, "We? How the hell did you even get here?”

“Followed you,” he says as he crosses his arms.

“You... followed me?” you repeat curiously.

“That’s what I said, isn’t it?”

"Why?" you ask softly, catching him off guard. You almost miss how his eyes widen at the sudden shift toward him.

He sighs and looks away, preferring to take in his surroundings, which mainly consist of the seemingly endless forest. "I've looked everywhere else and there's nothing, so I'm assuming you've found something if you keep coming here."

You hum, so he’s not just an angry idiot after all; he’s an observant idiot too.

“So?” he asks with a small bob of his head.

"So what?"

He scowls, which takes you by surprise because you thought he was already scowling... must just be his face then. “So, did you find something?”

“Oh,” you say. "Yeah, I did, kinda.”

He seems to perk up, impatiently asking, “What is it?”

You go silent briefly, unsure of how to explain a random, uncanny door deep into the forest. "uh- it's difficult to explain," you admit sheepishly.

“Just spit it out already, idiot.”

“No, because you probably won’t even believe me!” you snap in frustration.

He rolls his eyes and pushes himself off the tree. “Then show me.”

You stare at him with wide eyes as he walks into the forest. “What?”

“Show me dumbass!” He barks back at you, not pausing to slow down.

You push yourself off the tree in a hurry, yelling as you run after him, “Can you fucking wait! You don’t even know where you’re going!”

He stops, but not without groaning dramatically, which makes you roll your eyes. You caught up to him quickly because he wasn't far away, but that didn't stop you from bending over and placing your hands on your knees as you breathed heavily in and out.

He looks down at you in slight disgust. “You didn’t even run that far, why are you acting like you're dying?”

“Because,” you breathe out heavily. "It takes a toll on you when you've been stuck here as long as I have!"

“Whatever, just hurry up.”

After a moment, you stand back up fully and jerk your head toward the forest, silently telling the boy, “Let's go.”

The walk is quiet; awkwardness hangs heavy in the air as you sluggishly lead the way. It makes you wish he had escaped, because then you wouldn’t have to be dealing with this.

“How long have you been here?” He asks, breaking the silence, which takes you by surprise, but you’re sure anything he does that isn’t just him scowling or yelling could take you by surprise at this point.

You clear your throat. “I dunno…. long.”

“You don’t know?”

"I stopped counting after the hundredth time the loop reset," you shrug.

“Jesus christ, you’ve been here that long?”

“Unfortunately,” you sigh.

Another moment of silence lingers between the two of you as you walk through the forest, but at least the awkwardness has subsided. Though how slowly you're walking is starting to irritate him.

“Can you walk any faster?” he asks harshly.

“I’m tired.”

“Not my problem.”

“You know what?” you say, stopping dead in your tracks. “I think I’m actually gonna take a break.”

“What?” he asks as he watches you sit down on the floor, leaning back against a tree.

you smile up at him mockingly. “Yep! I’m super tired; I need a break.”

He scoffs. “Fuck you, get up.”

You shake your head. “Nah, I don’t think I will. If you wanna get there so bad, find it yourself.”

He glares at you, his lip twitching with the threat of turning into a sneer. “Fine, I will,” he says through clenched teeth.

You’re still smiling at him as you wave goodbye and watch him walk deeper into the forest. He won’t find it. You know that because the door is still a ways away—you've done this walk over a hundred times—he has no chance of finding it without you, so you'll just sit here and relax until he comes running back to you. Lord knows you need it.

☆。*。☆。☆。*。☆。☆。*。☆。☆。*。☆。☆。

Sometime during your relaxing, you ended up falling asleep. Which you didn’t even know was possible here, but nonetheless, it was well appreciated. You would have continued sleeping if it hadn't been for something softly kicking your legs. You frown and try to swat whatever is kicking you away without opening your eyes, wanting to sleep more, but the kicking doesn't stop. You finally, and begrudgingly, open your eyes to find the boy (who you knew would come back) is the one kicking you.

"Oh, you're back already," you yawn, rubbing your eyes.

He stared at you curiously. “Already?”

You nod as you stand up. “I knew you’d come back.”

“Fuck you, you don’t know shit.”

"Then why are you back?"

He tsks and looks away. “Whatever.”

“That’s what I thought,” you say triumphantly.

He says nothing; instead, he waits for you to start walking ahead so he can follow you. Your walking is much faster now, and although you're still exhausted, it’s much more tolerable now. It's as if the fog around your head has lifted, and you can function normally now. If time worked properly here, it would have been about an hour or two after you guys resumed walking when he finally decided to break the long silence.

“Jesus christ, do you even know where you’re going?” he asks in frustration.

You roll your eyes. “Of course I do. I'm not an idiot.”

“Debatable,” he mumbles under his breath.

You decide to ignore that and sigh. “We’re almost there chill out.” There's another lull of silence before you ask, "What's your name?"

He turns to look at you briefly with narrowed eyes before settling his gaze back in front of him. “What? Why the fuck would I tell you that?"

"We're stuck in a time loop together, so I thought it would be nice to know your name, but if you just want me to keep referring to you as an idiot, I'd be more than happy-"

"It's Bakugo," he cuts you off, clearly annoyed.

“I'm y/n,” you say with a grin—wait, you’re actually smiling at getting to know someone? That's odd; you would never... But you guess you could allow it just this once, considering the circumstances.

“Didn’t ask.”

You ignore him. “We’re almost there, by the way.”

“Fucking finally, what even is it?”

You’re close enough that you can see it in the distance. you point at it as you speak, “a-“

“A door?” he erupts, cutting you off and beginning to run off toward it.

You quickly run after him. “Bakugo wait, don't t-“

You suddenly awake with a gasp.

“Don't touch it,” you say to yourself with a groan. "Fucking idiot," you mutter as you roll out of bed, ignoring your routine and simply slipping on your shoes and running off into the city to find him again.

Once you arrive, like yesterday, you can’t find him, and you frown as you start walking toward the forest, because if it’s anything like yesterday, he’d end up there. At least you're hoping he’s there, because if he actually managed to get out before you by doing the same thing you’ve done for a hundred plus times, you would be furious. You arrive at the forest to find him already there, leaning against a tree, and you sigh out in relief as he stands up straight once he sees you.

"What the fuck happened?" he asks when you reach him.

You exhale heavily, slightly frustrated, a dull pain in your head adding to your frustration. "Well, if you had let me explain, I would have told you that touching the door resets the time loop."

"Oh,” he says blankly. “Sorry.”

“You’re apologizing?..” You ask in slight disbelief, he doesn’t seem like the kind of person who would, but then again, you don’t even know him. Who are you to judge him? Wow, you’ve been here so long that you’ve actually gotten to the point of not judging people; maybe you are going insane.

“Yeah.”

“You don’t seem like someone who would.”

He shrugs. “I wasn't, but, uh, I’ve been trying to work on it or something.”

“I’m not either,” you confess. “But, uh, for the record, I guess i’m sorry too… for you know, yelling at you?”

A range of emotions seem to slather themselves onto Bakugo’s face. first anger, then confusion, and then disgust before his usual scowl returns. “Whatever. What now?”

“Now we go back to the door.”

“And do what?”

“Stare at it? I don't know,” you sigh.

“I’m sorry?” he says in confusion as his eyes immediately narrow in on you. “Is that all you’ve been doing? Staring at the fucking door?”

You throw your arms up in the air dramatically as you defend yourself, asking, “What the fuck else am I supposed to do? If I touch it, the time loop restarts!”

His eye twitches. “So we’re just gonna stare at it. Until what? We fucking die here?”

“Who’s to say we aren’t even already dead?” you mumble under your breath in annoyance. “Besides, do you have any better ideas?”

Bakugo stays silent.

“Right, that’s what I thought.”

He tsks and starts walking into the forest. “Whatever, let's just go.”

You find yourself biting back a smile at what you consider a win, even if this wasn’t a challenge; you just have a terrible habit of seeing everything as a challenge... but nonetheless you find yourself walking with him side by side quietly. The walk was, of course, long, but not as long as last time considering you didn’t stop to sleep this time, so the two of you quickly found yourselves at the door. Both of you just stand there staring at it.

“Maybe it’ll actually do something this time,” Bakugo says, tilting his head at the door as if trying to look at it from a different angle.

You drop yourself to the ground, sitting down with a soft groan. “Try whatever you want in a little bit; doesn’t the time loop being reset hurt your head?”

Bakugo looks down at you and shrugs. “Haven’t noticed.”

You laugh, though it comes out more like a huff of air. “You will eventually.”

Bakugo stares at you curiously, what you said having piqued his interest, as he plops himself down on the ground next to you. “How long have you been here?”

You raise an eyebrow at him. “You’ve already asked me that.”

He rolls his eyes. “I’m asking again.”

“I don’t know. My answer's still the same.”

He nods slowly. “What was it like?” he asks. "You know, in the beginning, all alone?"

“You actually care?” you ask, wide-eyed and in slight disbelief.

He tsks and returns his attention to the door in front of him. “I don't,” he says harshly. “I’m just trying to make conversation; what the fuck else are we supposed to do?”

"Fair enough," you say, nodding slightly. "At first, I kinda liked it here."

“How?”

“I liked being alone.”

“That’s fucking stupid,” he spits out.

You frown. “You don’t look like the type to enjoy other people’s company either.”

“I don’t.”

“Then what the fuck?”

"I don't like people, but I also don't like being alone," he says softly.

“You’re an idiot.”

“Whatever,” he says. “So what? Do you not like being alone anymore?”

you shrug. “If being alone meant I didn’t have to deal with your dumbass anymore, then yes, I still like being alone.”

“Fuck you; you just complained about being alone,” he grumbled.

“I did not complain,” you explain. “I’m just saying I like being alone when it’s on my own terms.”

He hums.

“And you?” you ask.

"And me what?" he asks, his eyes narrowing at the door.

"What was it like when you first got here?"

“Oh,” he says before he thinks for a moment. “I don’t know; annoying more than anything. I have shit to do in the real world; this doesn’t help.”

You pull your knees in toward your chest. “Where do you even think we are?”

"Fuck if I know," he says, shrugging. "I just want to get the fuck out; if I was stuck here as long as you, I'd probably go insane."

You stare at him blankly. “You’re already insane, and I'm already insane.”

Bakugo side eyes you.

“What other logical explanation is there for us being here? We’re obviously crazy.”

He huffs and you almost find yourself mistaking it for a laugh. "Yeah, I guess so.”

You feel your heart race a little, and although you two still bicker a bit, you can’t deny how much you're starting to appreciate his company. It's an odd feeling, really, appreciating company for a change instead of immediately trying to get rid of it. As you push yourself up onto your feet, you sigh. “Round two?”

He nods as he copies your actions by standing up. “Guess so.”

You take a deep breath before touching the door, only to gasp as you awaken, but this time there's another gasp. You look beside you and discover Bakugo in your bed, which causes you to fall out of it from shock.

"Jesus, why are you in my bed?!"

“Why are you asking like I fucking know?!”

You immediately rose to your feet, rubbing your head because, if the headache from the reset wasn’t enough, you also hit it when you fell out of bed. “What the fuck is going on…”

Bakugo quickly gets out of your bed and tsks. “Why’d it change?”

“Maybe the time loop likes us working together?” You ask rhetorically because it's not like Bakugo has an answer either.

“Yeah, or it hates us working together.”

“Whatever it is, at least something changed finally. Maybe other things changed too?” you wonder as you go to slip on your shoes.

“Do we plan on just going back to the stupid ass door every time?”

"It's not like we have any other options, Bakugo. Are you ready?”

“I fucking guess.”

The two of you venture off into the city, with nothing seeming out of place or changed, and it becomes obvious that the only thing that changed was Bakugo being in your bed when you end up reaching the door.

"So much for something changing," mutters Bakugo, frustrated.

You drop yourself to the ground again. “This is annoying.”

He mimics your actions. “No shit.”

A moment of silence falls between you two before you speak up. “Are you even real?”

Bakugo’s face scrunches up in annoyance and confusion. “What the fuck do you mean am i real?”

“I don't know! Maybe I have gone insane and just made you up!”

He rolls his eyes. “Yes, I'm real. I have a whole fucking life outside of this place,” he turns his attention to you, “Are you real?”

“Yes, I also have a whole fucking life outside of this place,” you snap back.

He hums, almost like he doesn't believe you, but he doesn't outright say it, and you quickly respond with a hum of your own before laying yourself down on the grass, looking up toward the never-changing sky. It's so blue and there are so many clouds that it almost looks fake, which makes sense given that this entire place appears to be fake, an empty husk of the real place that exists somewhere else outside of here.

"How was your life?" you inquire, seemingly out of nowhere.

Bakugo looks down at you. “Boring,” he says with a sigh. "It wasn't as boring as this place, but it was still fucking boring; at least I had friends and could do shit there."

You can't help but giggle. “You had friends?”

He scowls at you and flips you off before turning away and nodding. “Unlike you, I'm sure.”

You shrug, though it looks more like a jolt. “I prefer being alone.”

“You say that, but you’re not all that convincing.”

“Oh, fuck off and tell me about your imaginary friends,” you snicker and ignore his very wrong—very right— comment.

He bit back a smirk in response to your jab at him. Normally, Bakugo would despise anyone who dared to fight back, but right now? It was actually nice? which, the feeling within itself, made Bakugo want to hate you even more.

“Bakugo?” you ask after a few moments of silence.

“Shut up, I'm thinking,” he snaps. "There are only three people I consider to be my friends."

You laugh. “What?”

“The rest are just.. acquaintances.”

You hum in content, your hands behind your head. “Tell me bout em.”

“There's this nerd; I've known him since we were kids,” he begins to explain. “I was a douche to him.”

"I can believe that."

Bakugo gives you a look that either says he wants to murder you or for you to shut up, and you merely grin up at him.

"He somehow forgave me, and yeah, we've been friends since."

“And the other two?”

“Some dumbass with shitty hair and another dumbass with pink cheeks,” he explains vaguely.

"Wow, I'm sure they really enjoy being called a dumbass," you state flatly.

He shrugs. "They should if they want to be my friend."

“Those are your only requirements? Tolerate being called a dumbass and anyone can be your friend?” you tease.

“Shut up, at least I have friends.”

“I already told you, I like being alone!” you defend with a pout.

He hums as he lays himself down. “And I already told you I don't believe you.”

"Believe what you want," you say as you turn to face him, only to find him already looking at you. “Besides, what do you care?”

He shifts his gaze to the sky. “I don’t.”

You follow along with him, looking back up at the sky, mumbling, "Sure you don't."

Bakugo doesn't bother replying, and you don't bother trying to keep the conversation going. The two of you just lay there, staring up at the sky and listening to the trees sway in the wind.

You suddenly find yourself being woken up with small kicks to your legs, and you groan. You try to open your eyes only to be blinded by the sun.

“Jesus Christ!” you wince.

Bakugo groans as he places his hand over your face to shield your eyes from the sun. You finally get them to open, and you mutter a small thanks to him.

“Did I fall asleep?” you ask as you stand up.

Bakugo shoves his hands into his pockets with a nod. “Yeah.”

“Sorry...”

"It's fine," he says, shrugging. “Round three?”

You nod as you stretch, which is a pointless action when you're about to be thrown into your bed, but you do it anyway. Bakugo touches the door, and you find yourselves immediately waking up with a gasp in your bed.

You jump straight up and rub your temples. “God, I will never get used to that.”

"Yeah, because the day you get used to that is the day you lose your mind."

You slip your shoes on and roll your eyes. “Ready?”

He stares at you blankly.

"Stupid question, my bad, damn," you quickly add, realizing he's not going to say anything.

When the two of you walk out of your house, Bakugo's steps are loud, and you can tell he's annoyed just by them. Bakugo tries to walk into the city only to be stopped by something.

"What are you doing?" you ask, watching him stagger backwards.

"It's not me," he snaps as he extends his hand in front of him, only to be stopped by something that isn't there, he kind of looks like a mime.

You hold back a laugh as you join him by his side, reaching out only to be stopped by an invisible wall of some sort; this makes your face drop. “What the fuck?”

“Exactly.”

“So what? We aren't allowed in the city anymore?”

"I guess not." Bakugo groans, annoyed. “Is there another way to the forest?”

You don't even get the chance to reply when the two of you hear rumbling. Both your heads snapping toward the noise only to see a newly carved out path to the forest in the distance.

You swallow hard, blinking at the scene in front of you. “You, uh, you saw that right?”

Bakugo nods slowly. “I did.”

You laugh nervously and extend your hands as if to show off the new path. “After you.”

“Fuck no, after you.”

“What are you scared? Coward.”

Bakugo glares at you. “Fuck you,” he says before starting to walk toward the path, and you smile in triumph.

The two of you are silent the whole walk, taking in your new surroundings for anything suspicious. This walk seems longer than the one from the city, but it's not like you expected anything different, and it doesn't matter when you finally get to the door.

"Why are things changing so suddenly?" you wonder as you stare at the door.

"Hell if I know," mumbles Bakugo, joining you in staring at the door.

“Do you think we’re doing something right?” you ask as you turn your head to look at him.

“Or something wrong.”

“God, this is so weird,” you sigh in frustration as you take a few steps back and sit down.

He turns to look down at you, perplexed. “Oh, now it's weird? It wasn't weird the first hundred fucking times we stared at this door?”

"You know what I mean."

He rolls his eyes as he sits down a few feet in front of you. “Whatever.”

You both sit there in silence, your minds racing with confusion. Why are things changing now, and are they changing for the better or for the worse? You sit there picking at your nails while he sits there staring at the door like he’s trying to make it explode with his mind. After a while, Bakugo sighs, and this catching of your attention makes you look up at him. When he speaks up, you're about to ask if he's okay.

“What was your life like?” He asks out of nowhere, and you certainly were not expecting that to come out of his mouth.

“Oh,” you say in slight confusion. “Um, fine? I don't know; I mean, I didn't have friends-“

“Knew it,” he chimes in with a smirk.

“Fuck off.”

"So, what did you have if you didn't have friends?" He asks flatly, not as if he really cares but as if he's just trying to avoid silence, which could be him caring in some ways.

“I had a job at a little coffee shop,” you recall with a small smile.

“I thought you would've worked from home or something.”

“Why?”

“Because you hate people and like being alone?” He says it almost condescendingly, like you should have already known the reason why.

“Huh,” you say flatly. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.” Maybe you were subconsciously yearning for social interaction?

“I'm always right.”

You hum and lay yourself down. “What’s your full name?”

He lays down with you. “Why the fuck do you wanna know? You gonna stalk me?”

“You wish.”

“Katsuki Bakugo.”

“That’s a nice name.”

He closes his eyes. “I know dumbass.”

“You could’ve just said thank you.”

“Thank you,” he says harshly, like he's mocking you, but you ignore it and smile. “What’s yours?” he asks quietly.

“Y/n L/n.”

“My name is better, but yours is alright, I guess,” he says under his breath, like this is his best attempt at a compliment.

You laugh softly, and the noise causes Bakugo's cheeks to warm, which he tries to ignore and blames on the sun. You don't bother responding and close your eyes. Both of you are just laying there with your eyes closed, enjoying each other's company, or at least you're enjoying his. Which is odd; it makes you slightly nauseous to think that for once, you’re actually enjoying someone's company.

Had someone told real life you that you'd be enjoying someone's company, you would have laughed in their face and probably insulted them for not being as “independent” as you are. But despite all of that, you can't actually say you hate it—not at all, actually. but for the time being, you're blaming that on the circumstances. After a while, you find yourself opening your eyes, slightly wincing at the bright sun, but turning your head to look at Bakugo, who is staring up at the sky without a scowl on his face. Huh. You thought that scowl was permanent, though he actually looks surprisingly nice without one?

“Are you dead?” you ask out of nowhere.

Bakugo flinches slightly, taken aback by your voice. “Being dead would probably be better than this.”

“Rude,” you huff.

“I mean the situation, not you.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” you tease. “Round four?”

He sighs defeatedly. “Yeah, I guess.”

You nod as the two of you stand up and quickly dust yourselves off. You step toward the door and find yourself hesitating.

“What are you waiting for?” Bakugo asks impatiently.

You shake your head and touch the door. You both wake up with a gasp, but you're not in your room; instead, you're back on the forest floor where you were just moments ago.

“What the fuck?” you exclaim aloud.

"Did you touch it?" asks Bakugo, looking down at the ground beneath him.

“Of course I did!” you explain. “I don't understand?”

Bakugo quickly stands up and offers a hand out to help you out. You hesitate to take his hand, making him shake his head as if to silently ask, “What's the problem?” You sigh as you accept his help.

Once your up, Bakugo pulls his hand away and asks, “Should we try to go back to your house?”

“Uh, yeah, sure, that's a good idea.”

Bakugo nods back, and you find yourself walking out of the forest, a strange feeling given that you're always walking in, never out; it's eerie in a way. You’ve only been walking for, what you assume, a few minutes when he speaks up.

"Is that actually your house?" he wonders. "Like in the real world, I guess."

You shake your head. “Nah, I just call it that considering how long I've been here, you know? I actually live in an apartment.”

He hums. “Me too.”

"You too?"

“Yes? Why the fuck do you sound so shocked?” he asks with a confused shake of his head.

"I don't know... I guess you seem like the type of person who would say they're too good for an apartment," you explain with a shrug.

“It’s cheaper, and because I have a roommate that makes it even more cheap.”

“Oh!! Let me guess!” you speak up excitedly. “Is it the nerd? Or the shitty hair? Oh or the pink cheeks?”

He finds himself chuckling at your use of his nicknames for them, and the sound goes straight to your stomach. Butterflies immediately begin to grow there. “It's the nerd,” he says once he’s finally composed himself.

You nod with a smile. “My roommate is a cat.”

He hums, and before he can respond, he walks straight into something, just like the last time, except this time it's not the invisible city wall he walked into but the middle of the forest. You immediately find yourself frantically grabbing at the invisible force.

“Are you serious?” you fume. “Now we’re trapped in the fucking forest?”

Bakugo finds himself walking toward the sides, only to find that those are blocked off by nothing as well. “So what? we can’t leave?”

“It doesn’t want us to leave,” you correct him.

“Who the fuck is it?” Bakugo asked with a confused glare.

“Whatever the fuck is doing this.”

Bakugo sighs out in defeat as he places his hands on his hips, letting his head drop as he just stares at the floor. “Now what?” he mumbles.

You rub your face in frustration. “We go back to the door, I guess.”

He lifts his head and tsks. “Great.”

The walk back into the forest is tense, but since you two had only made it halfway before being stopped, it wasn't that long. Still, the air between you two had become suffocating from your respective frustrations with being trapped here, his more so than yours. Finally, you two arrive at the door, and Bakugo collapses to the ground with a loud groan.

“This sucks,” he seethes.

You shrug as you take a seat in front of him. “It could be worse.”

“What?” he asks harshly. “Please, please, please enlighten me on how this could be any worse.”

You keep your gaze on the ground, nervously pulling out the grass as you speak. “Well, I mean, yeah, of course it sucks! like, really bad! and like, yeah, sure, the universe seems very against me right now, but at least I have you?”

"Huh," he says blankly before remaining silent for a moment, and you grimace; you should not have said that. Why the fuck would you say that? “Yeah.”

Your head shoots up to see him already staring at you softly. “Yeah?” you repeat.

"Yeah, you're right," he says slowly, almost painfully so.

You can't help but break out into a wide grin. “Bakugo? Are you actually starting to care about me?”

He bites back a smile as he rolls his eyes. “Oh fuck off.”

You laugh and lay yourself on the grass. “Lay with me.”

He hums curiously at you yet listens, laying himself right next to you, leaving only a small space between you two. You ignore the strange urge to take his hand in yours.

“Do you think we would’ve been friends in, like, real life, I guess?”

“I never agreed to being your friend,” he points out flatly, ignoring your question.

“Shut up, Bakugo.”

He snickers. “Probably not though.”

You feign offense, or you feign feigning offense, because that does actually hurt your feelings slightly. “Rude…”

“Shut up. I don't mean it like that,” he reassures. “I mean, you even said it yourself—you don't like people, and I only consider like three people my friends.”

You frown. “I guess you’re right.”

"It's futile to think about that shit now; I doubt we'll ever go back," he mumbles, disappointed.

You ignore how much you’re not disappointed that you might not ever go back anytime soon. “Round five?”

Bakugo nods as he stands up. “Yeah.”

You try to get up, but he stops you. You stare at him curiously.

“If we’re just going to end up lying back down when it restarts, maybe if you’re already lying down, your head won't hurt as much?” he questions thoughtfully.

You ignore how warm your cheeks feel at his concern and lay back down. “Yeah, maybe.”

Bakugo nods at you before touching the door, and still, both of you end up waking up with a gasp in your positions from a moment ago, but your head doesn't hurt this time.

Bakugo ignores the disappointment swimming in his stomach and turns his gaze to you, who appears shocked. “Did it work?”

You nod slowly before looking at him with a smile. “Yeah, it did! Thanks Bakugo..”

He presses his lips into a tight line as if to stop a smile or ignore how hot his face feels. “Yeah, whatever. Uh, should we go see how far we can make it out?”

You stand up and extend your hand to him, and he quickly accepts it. “Yep!”

The two of you don't even make it ten feet away before being blocked by an invisible wall. The two of you stumble back and stare at each other wide-eyed before both of you immediately start walking out toward the sides, only to be stopped again.

"Oh my fucking god, it boxed us in," Bakugo barks.

You laugh out nervously. “Um, so, like, is it just gonna keep getting smaller?”

Bakugo's head snaps toward you in concern as your voice shakes, and he notices you beginning to tremble.

"N-not that it's a big deal; I'm not claustrophobic or anything, I'm just curious." You panic, your chest heaving up and down.

Bakugo immediately runs up to you (not that he has to run far) and places his hands on your shoulders, roughly gripping them in some poor attempt to ground you, which works slightly because now you're staring at just him, getting lost in his eyes.

“It’s fine, It's gonna be fucking fine,” he says harshly. “I’ll get us out of here, okay?”

You just stare at him, blinking at him blankly.

He shakes you gently. “Y/n?”

you swallow harshly.

“Y/n!”

You flinch. “Y-yes?”

"You're going to be fine," he assures, softly smiling at you.

And although you know he can't guarantee that, he can't guarantee that you'll be okay or that he’ll get you guys out of here, you still believe him.

you nod. “Okay. I trust you.”

He nods and returns his hands to his sides before walking back to the door (not that he has to walk far) and sitting down, patting the ground in front of him to invite you to join him. You two sit in comfortable silence, but you can't stand it; you need to talk about something or you'll start spiraling at the thought of the invisible walls closing in on you.

“Do you think we’re supposed to be learning something?” you inquire, pulling your knees into your chest.

He leans back on his palms as he stares at you through furrowed eyebrows. “What?”

“Like a lesson?” you elaborate. "Isn't that why most people get trapped in time loops?"

He gives a half-shrug and thinks for a moment. “I guess? Do you think you’re learning a ‘lesson’?”

“Maybe?” you say as you place your head on your knees.

Bakugo stares at you, and when you don't say anything, he bobs his head as if to tell you to go on.

“I don't think I like being alone as much as I say I do.”

"Oh?" he says, tilting his head at you with a cocky grin.

You roll your eyes at him through a smile. “Shut up… I'm just saying you’re not so bad; your company is actually enjoyable?”

“Of course it is; It’s me,” he boasts.

“I regret saying anything.”

“I get it, though.”

“You do?”

He nods. “I mean, I get it through my lesson?”

You bobbed your head at him in the same way he did at you.

"Maybe I don't hate having or making new friends as much as I say I do," he admits quietly.

“Of course you don't; it’s me,” you mock with a shit-eating grin.

He stares at you just smiling fondly, not even a laugh, or a fuck off. No, he's just staring at you as if you're the best thing that's ever happened to him, as if you created the universe—no, scratch that, as if you are the universe. But before you or he can say anything, you hear something rattling, specifically the door handle rattling.

Both of your heads turn toward the door, watching it rattle before looking back at each other and slowly rising in unison.

“Get behind me,” he whispers harshly.

“I can take care of—“

“Y/n,” he snaps through clenched teeth in an attempt to hush his voice.

You sigh and begrudgingly agree, placing yourself behind him as you two walk toward the door.

He takes a deep breath before whispering, "Round six?"

You nod slowly. “Round six.”

You gasp and sit up quickly, instinctively looking to your side for Bakugo, but you're met by your cat.

He paws at you, and you just stare blankly at him, your chest heaving up and down rapidly. Your cat climbs onto your lap, and you begin to pet him as tears sting your eyes and you take in your surroundings. Though your moment of realizing you're back home is ruined by a phone call. You immediately pick up.

“Bakugo?” you say breathlessly.

Your coworker clears her throat awkwardly. “uh what? It’s mina, y/n. Where are you? I mean, I know you don't like me, but at least come to work!"

You exhale heavily and rub the tears from your eyes harshly. "I'm so sorry, Mina- I'll be there as soon as I can."

“Oh, uh, it’s fine. Take your time. See you soon!” She says it softly, obviously taken off guard by your apology and lack of hostility.

You hang up quickly and sniffle. “Shit,” you mutter under your breath. How long has it even been? Has any time even passed here? When you look at the date, it is the same as it was before you were thrown into the time loop. It could have been months there, but here? It had been merely seconds, if that. You feel your heart break at the lack of Bakugo here; you had been stuck with him for probably weeks, and now you’re... not. And you’re supposed to just go back to being a productive member of society like nothing happened? Like he didn't just single-handedly change your view on being alone? You sigh and shake your head as you pick your cat off of you, now is not the time to have an existential crisis, you have a job to get to. You set your cat down and practically dash to get dressed, not caring enough about even looking presentable as you grab your things and run out the door, getting to your job in record time.

☆。*。☆。☆。*。☆。☆。*。☆。☆。*。☆。☆。

Mina is surprised to see you almost break through the door. “I told you to take your time,” she says with a frown.

You shake your head and bend over as you catch your breath. “No, it's okay,” you say through ragged breaths.

She just stares at you silently until you calm down and approach her behind the counter. “I'm sorry,” you say once you've reached her.

She laughs. "It's fine; being late isn't such a big deal."

You frown; god, she's really gonna make you say it, isn’t she? “No, I mean, I'm sorry about, uh, always being an asshole towards you and stuff,” you start mumbling toward the end, of course you mean it but you still find it quite embarrasing.

“Oh! Thank you? Um… Did something happen?”

You let out a breathy laugh that almost sounds sad, if that's even possible, and if it isn't, you're making it so. “Uh, yeah, you could say that.”

Mina notices how your demeanor has wilted and places a comforting hand on your shoulder while giving you a small smile.

You return her smile before sighing. "I'm gonna go put my things in the back."

While in the back, you hear the shop bell ring, indicating that a customer is approaching, so you hurry and put your belongings away to assist Mina. Once you're back out there, you don't notice how the customer is waiting by the counter, where you would hand them their coffee. Your main focus is just on making the drink as Mina hands you the cup with what they want written on it. You make quick work of it as Mina starts taking other orders from people beginning to walk in, and in record time you finish the drink, walking to the side of the counter where people pick up coffees. You turn the cup around to look for a name and feel your heart drop when you see it.

Your brow furrows as you mumble, "Bakugo?"

When he hears your voice, Bakugo's head snaps up from his phone, and he doesn't even try to hide the smile that has now appeared on his face. “Y/n?”

"Holy shit!" you exclaim excitedly as you lose your grip on his drink and it splatters everywhere, Bakugo laughing at how half of it is now on your clothes and you can't help but laugh along with him.

“You plan on remaking my drink?”

You nod quickly and hurriedly speak, “Yes! but, um, can you stay after?”

He smirks. “What, was our time together not enough for you?”

You roll your eyes playfully at him. “If I agree, will you stay?”

"Maybe."

You sigh. "Yes Bakugo, our time together wasn't enough for me."

Bakugo chuckles softly.

“Yeah Y/n, I’ll stay.”

©TODAYISAWTHEWHXLEWXRLD

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odaengz · 2 months ago

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TAKE A CHANCE WITH ME! — yushi smau

chapter 4 ! don’t you worry your pretty little head (short written, 621 words)

content warnings — short written portion before smau portion, cussing, timestamps are irrelevant, reader is a pathetic yearner! yay!

you squinted at your phone. ningning just loved to mess with you.

but in all honesty, spending time with anyone was better than being alone with your thoughts.

because being alone meant thinking about him—and lately, it seemed like that was all you could do.

the past two days, he was all you could think about. the memory of that night clung onto you like smoke.

his smile appeared in the midst of crowded hallways, as if the ghost of him was following you. his voice, soft, like cotton candy, echoed against the walls of quiet study rooms. the warmth of his touch, lingered every time a friend brushed against your shoulder.

the thought of him was eating you alive.

every passing moment, a reminder that the perfect boy was out there. and you had met him. you just failed to keep him.

even as you walked across campus, your thoughts drifted back to that night. how nervous he was when you asked to kiss him. how good he looked in his stupid outfit. how comfortable he made you feel.

part of you had even considered the idea that the guy ningning mentioned might somehow be him. of course you knew better, but that didn’t stop you from hoping.

—

you stepped into the study room that ningning was in and you scanned the space.

that was when your eyes landed on a familiar silhouette. a boy with dark hair and puffed out cheeks—riku.

your eyes blinked rapidly before it flicked to ningning. “riku. you were talking about riku?”

riku’s eyes, which were once laser-focused on the laptop in front of him, shot up to meet yours. “you were talking about me?”

you scoffed, plopping down onto a chair next to him. “she said the man of my dreams was in here.”

ningning let out a laugh. “no. i wasn’t talking about—“

her sentence was cut short by the sound of the door creaking open.

that was when he walked in.

silver hair. white, oversized t-shirt. baggy grey sweats. thick-rimmed glasses. a smile so bright that it almost felt annoying—like he didn’t realize the power it held. and big doe eyes. the kind that could shut someone down with one look.

he was laughing as he entered, like he owned the place. too much energy for a library. two other boys followed behind him. you didn’t recognize any of them, not that it mattered anyways.

your mind shifted, quietly praying that another boy—that boy—would walk in behind them. but then the last one pulled the door shut. and just like that, your hope had been left out in the hallway behind it.

your gaze trailed back to the silver-haired boy. something about him felt familiar, but you couldn’t quite put your finger on it.

before you could even stop yourself, you were staring. ningning noticed this, and her eyes shot you a look—one that screamed “i told you so.”—but you shrugged it off, frowning. whoever could’ve walked in could’ve been the most attractive man on earth—and you still wouldn’t have cared.

not unless it was the boy from the bar.

the silver-haired boy sat down on an empty chair next to you and turned to you with a curious smile. “hi,” he offered his hand, “i’m oh sion. you must be ningning and riku’s friend?”

you shook it back, “hi! im sung yn. and yes, unfortunately i am.”

ningning gasped, “oh you love me.”

the table giggled at the interaction and without hesitation, sion pulled everyone into study mode.

and just like that, you were alone again—your mind left to wander back to that night. back to him.

wondering if maybe, just maybe, he was thinking about you too.

navigation ! masterlist | prev | next

synopsis — fresh out of a horrific break up, yn gets invited out to the club by her friends. on the other hand, tokuno yushi, the quietest in his group of friends, is dragged to the same one. after spending a night filled with a whirlwind of emotions together, they both make the mistake of never formally introducing themselves. they are both determined to find each other again. after all, if they were really soulmates, fate would take over again. right?

author’s note — hayy another written chapter yayyyy!! looking at the layout i have planned for this story a lot of it might actually be written … i wrote this at like 2 am and barely proof read it so it might be dew dew .. but YAY yushi and yn’s first bridge has been formed muahaha

taglist (open!) — @dudekiss3r @suzayaaa @jaellymint @sillyyuz @spacejip @ditsydeer101 @holyhaech @buns-inhiding @sibwol @ant-onie @yvshi @taroddori @ttjisung @kyubing @yushiela @sakuyaswish @chengerinelove @tae2an @nahyuckers @flaminghotyourmom @kaosuni @ayukas @t-102 @jaeyunluvbot @bananinhazz @sionshii @kkunyangz @love4yubin @heewrld @calmzhi @hypneosis @bruberri

#nct wish #yushi #nct wish smau #kpop #kpop smau #nct #nct smau #wish #nct wish social media au #nct social media au #tokuno yushi #yushi smau #nct wish fluff #nct wish angst #nct wish x reader #yushi x reader

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juyeonszn · 2 years ago

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BAD IDEA RIGHT?

PAIRING lee juyeon x f!reader

WORD COUNT 4.10k

GENRES … smut

WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, literally porn with plot. like i’m so insane, enemies to “we fuckin” as reese put it 🥰, frat boy tbz again!!!, juyo is literally so irritating in the first half im not even gonna lie, he’s also a manwhore, making out, reader is a bit of a brat, juyeon has a dirty mouth, kinda dom!juyeon, vaginal fingering, oral (m! receiving), SHOWER SEX !12!1!, he’s hitting it from the back btw, unprotected sex, creampie, juyeon is actually… i don’t even know how to describe him writing his character made me want to claw at the walls lol

SUMMARY deep down you’re fully aware that you’re probably making a huge mistake by giving into juyeon just like every other girl on campus ever has. but paired with how intoxicating his mouth feels on your own and the steam filled bathroom clouding your head, you can’t seem to find a logical reason to stop.

MORE heheheh im back 🤭 oh my god this was actually the cause of a week full of sleepless nights. i genuinely drove myself crazy writing this bc NEED FRRRR like idk i’m so 😭 delusional. ANYWAYS. ANON. THIS ONE IS FOR U. U REQUESTED THIS AND I RAN WITH IT. u wanted more juyeon, i deliver more juyeon ;) also shout out to ally, moni, AND reese for beta’ing 🥺 i love u my cupcakes!! prompt used: 18 <3

PERM TAGLIST @winterchimez @maessseongs @itsbeeble

If there was anyone on Earth that you hated more than anything, it had to be Lee Juyeon.

To put things plainly, he was quite literally the bane of your existence. Being around him made your blood pressure skyrocket and gave you migraines that lasted for days. It was insane how one person could affect you so much by doing so little. It seemed as if he thrived off of getting under your skin.

Considering he was the captain and the pitcher of the baseball team, it wasn’t shocking. He was also a member of one of the most popular fraternities on campus. But he happened to be roommates with one of your best friends, and that made it ten times worse.

You’d known Changmin since third grade, along with Kevin and Chanhee. When he mentioned he’d be joining a fraternity in college, you were a bit apprehensive. All you knew about them was what you’d read in YA books and seen in movies. Neither gave them a good rep. Part of you wanted to talk him out of it, but you knew this was something you had to let him do, given you were adults and it was his college experience. At least you still had the other two under one roof.

The first time you met Juyeon was also the first time you attended a frat party. Changmin had just passed his initiation after waiting a year and he invited all of you to celebrate. You were excited for the most part since high school parties were more for an adrenaline rush due to the fact that your parents never let you go to them and you either snuck out or lied about going. You didn’t have to worry about the limitations of parents this go around.

The boys disappeared almost immediately upon arrival, leaving you to fend for yourself in the very crowded fraternity house. You could hardly pass through a room without bumping into somebody’s shoulder or elbow, huffing as you maneuver around the house equivalent to a sardine can. Your drink nearly spilled onto your top multiple times and you were glad you decided against the heels for the night.

You chugged the rest of the jungle juice in your cup as you stepped onto the patio, where it’s just as noisy and just as packed. You’re lucky enough to find an empty lounge chair near the house’s pool, unoccupied and calling your name. When your legs touch the plastic chair, you flinch at how hot it is, most likely from being in the sun all day.

“Woah, do you want a cushion?”

You look up at the source of the voice. You’ve seen him around campus before, and even at Changmin’s games. Lee Juyeon was just one of those people that you had to know, unless you’d been living under a rock. Just like everyone else in the world, you couldn’t deny how attractive he was. From this distance, you truly understood why girls would giggle like high schoolers over the guy.

“Uh, sure. Yeah, that would be great actually.” You nod, watching as he wanders towards the shed in the corner of the big ass backyard. He returns promptly, holding his red solo cup between his teeth and one hand on your lower back guiding you to a standing position so he could place down the cushion.

“As a thank you, can I get your name?” He gives you a cocky little smile that should’ve been a warning. And looking back on it, you should’ve seen his true personality sooner, to be completely honest. The way his lips curled at the corners, like a conniving bastard who got off on irritating others.

“It’s Y/N,” you say, messing with your empty cup. “I’d ask for yours, but I kinda already know.”

He laughs at that, scratching the back of his neck. “That’s not surprising.” It’s at this point that you’re starting to see through his sweet facade, but despite knowing better— despite always keeping your guard up— you let yourself fall for it just this once. All because you didn’t want to fuck things up for Changmin. He owed you big time.

“Well, you are a talented athlete.” You didn’t want to fuel what is probably already a massive ego, but you’d rather compliment his baseball skills than the fact that he was infamous for screwing around with half of the girls on campus. Technically, that was a feat of its own since he’d only been in school for a year.

“Oh, so you think I’m talented?” He rested a hand on your chair, leaning down to your level. Confidence oozed from every corner of his being and if you weren’t so self aware, perhaps you could’ve ended up like all those other victims of his charismatic behavior.

“I go to the games for Changmin,” you scoff, glancing away from his face to stop the heat rising up your neck. “I’ve only paid attention to you once or twice.”

“Yeah, sure. Let's go with that,” he bites his lip, blatantly checking you out. “I wouldn’t mind paying attention to you a little.”

“I’m unimpressed, Juyeon,” you snort, raising an eyebrow at him. “Does this shit really work on everyone?”

“I can drop the act if you want, baby. Just let me know when you’re ready to stop playing hard to get.” He stands upright, running a hand through his hair.

Every time you ran into Lee Juyeon after that, he was more and more insufferable. He knew his influence on you, too, if his smug fucking grin was anything to go by. You wish you could just slap it off of him. However, you stood by being the bigger person in any given situation, so that was off the table. (And half of you still felt a moral obligation to not get your friend into hot water.)

“Would it kill you to play nice every once in a while? I do live with the dude, you know.” Changmin whines, trailing you in the supermarket like a lost puppy.

“He’s got a point, N/N,” Kevin adds, humming as he tosses a boxed dinner into the cart. “I get that he’s a little bit of an overconfident douche, but rolling your eyes at him when he hasn’t even done anything just makes it worse on you. And JiChang, too, I guess.”

“Bro…”

You weren’t even sure why he decided to tag along with you and the other boys when you mentioned grocery shopping. In fact, he might as well have stayed his ass home if he was just going to gang up on you the whole time. Chanhee sighs dramatically, bringing your shopping cart to a halt.

“Can we not have a peaceful grocery trip? Is that impossible or something?” His lips form a thin line. “I swear, all we do is talk about how much Y/N hates Lee Juyeon. Can we please move on?”

“Thank you, Chanhee, I agree,” you nod along, walking backwards as you do so and ignoring the faces your friends make. “He makes me want to kill myself.”

“Who makes you want to kill yourself?”

You jump up, frightened by the sudden voice in your ear. Your friends all give you sheepish smiles, as if they’d already tried to warn you. (What shitty jobs they did.) With a hand over your heart, you turn around to meet— speak of the devil— none other than Lee Juyeon himself.

“What are you doing here?” Your eyes narrow and your arms cross over your chest. Luck could never be on your side when it came to this guy.

“Uh, last I checked, this was a public supermarket. Where I can publicly shop. I wasn’t aware that I had to run that by you. So sorry, sweetheart.” He pouts, his expression so theatrical you nearly give in to your constant urge to punch him in the face.

You feel your eye twitch, and it takes everything in you to step back and assess just how bad it would be if you committed murder right now. Changmin comes to your rescue, doing damage control as best as he can while Kevin attempts to talk you out of becoming a criminal.

The two frat brothers do their little fraternity handshake thing and then finally he’s out of sight, out of mind, allowing you to visibly relax. Chanhee purses his lips. “Okay, so maybe I do see where the anger comes from. And holy shit, Y/N, you have the patience of a saint.”

“The person you have called is unavailable! At the tone, please leave a message. When you have finished recording, you may—”

“Goddammit.” You curse, ending the unsuccessful call.

The downside of working far from campus, was working far from campus. You didn’t have your own car and usually relied on one of your roommates for a ride to and from. But now here you are, stranded at work while it’s pouring cats and dogs outside. Kevin was in class and Chanhee wasn’t picking up his phone. You could call Changmin, but you’re pretty sure he also had a class around this time.

Just as you’re about to succumb to your demise, you receive a text from Chanhee.

[2:57 pm] michael jackson: IM SO SORRY AJNSSJNW BUT SOMETHING CAME UP WITH A GROUP PROJECT

[2:57 pm] michael jackson: DONT WORRY THOUGH, IVE GOT IT COVERED UR STILL GETTING PICKED UP

“Could today get any worse?” You mutter to yourself, locking your phone and tossing it into your purse. As if your timing couldn’t be better, you spoke entirely too soon. Your eyes squint at the unfamiliar car rolling up under the carport. Your brows furrowed in confusion, because you had no idea who could be your saving grace. Chanhee was a wild card so who knew who he had on speed dial.

But then the passenger window rolls down and you wish the ground would just swallow you whole. Lee Juyeon grins that stupid fucking grin of his, beckoning you to his car as it unlocks when he shifts into park. You shake your head.

“No way. There is absolutely no way I am getting into that car.” You shout over the pelting rain.

Juyeon tsks, his eyes rolling when he reaches over the center console to open the door for you. “Is there anyone else who would drop everything they’re doing to pick you up in this weather?”

Your lips pull into a flat line. The answer was no, you didn’t have anyone else who would drop everything they were doing to pick you up in this weather. That was the reason Juyeon was here, you supposed. It didn’t mean you weren’t at least going down without a fight, though. Except, Lee Juyeon was a man who was all too comfortable with how expressive you were. Most notably towards him.

“What? Cat got your tongue, sweetheart?”

“Fuck you. I’d rather walk.” You seethe, starting straight in the direction of your apartment. Juyeon groans at first, your constant need to prove yourself getting on his nerves for once. Then his eyes widen slightly when he realizes you’re not joking.

The truth was that the rain was freezing and you’d love to be in the shelter of a warm car. In fact, you didn’t really care that Juyeon was the person driving. But you were too deep into the bit now. You couldn’t just turn around and get in the car, for you had a pride to protect at this point.

“Shit.” Juyeon swears under his breath, reaching into the backseat to grab an umbrella. Sure he loved to tease you and rile you up, but he wasn’t cruel. Your friends would have his head on a silver platter if he let anything happen to you.

You pause in your steps when you’re no longer being showered in rain water. Juyeon holds the umbrella over your head with a worried expression. You feel kind of bad for making him chase after you even though he’d already gone out of his way to pick you up. Sometimes you wish your ego wasn’t so fragile. Maybe then you could accept help when you needed it instead of making things worse.

“Can you please stop being so stubborn and just get in the damn car, Y/N? Do you have to make everything difficult all the time?” Usually, pissing you off made him over the moon, but you can tell he’s not exactly pleased at the moment. You swallow thickly, nodding quietly and following him back to his car.

The whole drive to your apartment is silent save for the song playing on his speakers. It’s not as loud in comparison to the storm outside, but you’re grateful that it’s filling the space between you. If only Lee Juyeon hadn’t done such an excellent job ticking you off like a bomb, then maybe you would’ve just hopped in the passenger seat with ease. But no, he had to goad you until you made an irrational decision and now here you are.

As he pulls up to your building, you say a little prayer that you don’t regret your next actions. He stops as close to the stairs as he can, but you turn to him before unbuckling your seatbelt. With a deep breath, you ask, “Would you like to— uh— come inside?”

He glances from you to the stairs and then shrugs, parking in the nearest empty spot. He holds the umbrella over both of you as you make your way to your unit, lightly sprinting so you don’t get anymore soaked than you already are. You figured the least you could do was invite the dude into your home and offer him some hot tea, just so he could warm up before heading back to the TBZ house. Your roommates not being here to make fun of you was also a plus.

There’s still an unspoken tension even after you’ve shed your raincoats and shoes by the front door, settling into your apartment and its coziness. Juyeon sits at the breakfast bar as you busy yourself with preparing the kettle and getting a couple tea bags. His watchful gaze is a little intimidating now that you’ve seen his serious side.

Once you’ve finished making the tea, you set his mug in front of him. You look everywhere but him when you say, “I’m gonna take a shower if you’re okay waiting out here by yourself.” He doesn’t respond verbally, so you take it as your cue to leave.

You turn on the water to let it heat up before gathering your essentials. When you’ve completed your back and forth trip from the bathroom and your bedroom, you’re finally ready to just relax in your shower and forget about today’s events. But how could you ever truly relax with Lee Juyeon in your space, permeating your peace?

As you’re shutting the bathroom door, a foot jams itself between the threshold and stops you. You glance up from the floor to meet Juyeon’s eyes. They’re darker than you’re used to, a deep shade of brown that has your stomach twisting into knots.

“You know, Y/N, this game of cat and mouse is starting to get old,” he takes a step into the steaming room, locking the door behind him and trapping you. “Just admit to yourself that you want me.”

You sputter at his bold words, because you don’t. You don’t want Lee Juyeon. Why would you want Lee Juyeon? “I’m not gonna lie to myself. I don’t want you.”

He laughs humorlessly, closing the gap between you just a little more. You don’t have it in you to back away from him. He reaches a hand up to tuck some damp hair behind your ear. You’re still wet and cold from your stupid idea to walk in the rain, but Juyeon plans to warm you up perfectly. “You sure?”

“Positive,” you breathe.

“Why don’t we test that theory?” Now he’s got you backed into the wall, his face a hair’s breadth distance from your own. “I have a feeling I can change your mind.”

You don’t know if it’s the heat of the bathroom or Juyeon’s lips being so close, but so far simultaneously that has your brain turning into static. Your head feels fuzzy, like you’re watching TV on an empty channel through a blurry lens. You lick your lips, vision trained on his. “Why don’t we?”

That’s all the confirmation he needs to press your mouths together in a searing kiss, hotter than the temperature of the room. You feel him smile against you when you make no move to push him away, instead carding your fingers through his hair. He groans when you tug a bit, twirling the longer strands around your index.

His hands slip under your top, thumbs rubbing circles into your waist. This is a terrible idea. Deep down you’re fully aware that you’re probably making a huge mistake by giving into Juyeon just like every other girl on campus ever has. But paired with how intoxicating his mouth feels on your own and the steam filled bathroom clouding your head, you can’t seem to find a logical reason to stop.

When you part for air, you both start stripping your top layers, resuming your attacks on each other’s lips once you’re left in nothing but undergarments. Juyeon trails kisses along the side of your neck, nipping and sucking wherever he feels fit. You gasp when he finds that particular spot that contributes to the butterflies fluttering about your stomach. “God, you’re so annoying.”

“Yeah?” And despite getting ready to give you the pleasure of your life, his grin against your skin still manages to irritate you. “You hate me so much, huh?”

“Mhm,” you whine as his fingers dip beneath the band of your panties, toying with your sensitive cunt. “Hate you so bad— ah…”

“You might wanna shut up soon, sweetheart,” Juyeon warns, sliding his ring finger between your lower lips. “Or else I’ll give that mouth something to do.”

“I’ll do whatever I want,” you pull his hand from your underwear, kneeling in front of him when he furrows his eyebrows in confusion. Your nails scrape lightly down his abdomen before hooking into the waistband of his briefs, freeing him from the material. It takes a lot out of you to not visibly react at the sight of his cock, hard and flushed to the tip. You couldn’t dare inflate his ginormous ego, the situation you were currently in already doing enough on its own. His size is impressive too, making you wonder just how he expects you to take him like a champ.

“What a fucking brat,” he hisses, your tongue swiping along the underside of his dick. “Always gotta have the last word, don’t you?”

“Mmmm,” you moan, mouth full with just the tip. You’d never been the type of person who cared about size. As long as they knew what they were doing and made you finish, you held no qualms with their length. In fact, you don’t think you ever even paid much attention to anyone’s dick in your life. But if there was anything to back Lee Juyeon’s cockiness, it had to be, well, his cock.

“You have no idea how many times I’ve imagined this moment,” he confesses, wrapping your hair around his hand into a makeshift ponytail. “But, fuck, this is so much better.”

The admission shoots straight to your core and you find yourself whimpering, the vibrations against his dick driving him crazy. He has to support his weight with one hand flat to the wall, the other still tightly fisting your hair. With every suck and flick of your tongue, he tugs a little more, the sting on your scalp providing you with more pleasure than pain. You pull off of him to take a breath, jerking him off as you do so.

“Am I meeting your expectations?” You bat your eyelashes up at him, drool sliding down your chin and makeup smeared under your eyes in tear streaks. He groans at the sight of you, forcing you to a standing position so he could kiss you again.

You start dragging him towards the shower, unhooking your bra and stepping out of your panties. He raises an eyebrow at you, amused. “You want me to fuck you in the shower, baby? Have you slipping all over my cock?”

“Duh,” you can’t help but roll your eyes at his question, practically pawing at his underwear to get him out of them fully. “Did you think I sucked your dick on the bathroom floor for fun?”

“That mouth of yours is gonna get you in trouble one of these days.”

He kicks them off, reconnecting your lips as you step into the shower. The hot water hits your back almost like a massage, synchronously getting in your mouth as you make out with Juyeon aggressively. It’s like he can’t get enough of you, big hands kneading and groping everywhere and nowhere all at once. You feel insane, especially with how good of a kisser he is. It’s like you’re on cloud nine and nothing’s capable of bringing you down.

When he’s finally lost his patience, he spins you around, pressing you cheek first to the shower wall. You feel him against your lower back, his lips leveling with your ear. In spite of acting as if he had himself under control, you can hear the pant in his breathing, deep voice a little desperate than usual. He has a hand gripping your thigh and picking up your leg.

“No protection?” He asks, his cock already gliding between your folds in anticipation.

“Mm-mm,” you shake your head as best you can with his body sandwiching you to the tiled surface. “Wanna feel you raw.”

“Fuck, you can’t say shit like that to me,” Juyeon groans into your ear, giving no warning as he spits down your front and hikes your leg higher, thrusting into your cunt. “You’ll make me wanna stay buried in you forever.”

You moan, hand coming up to hold the side of his head as he fucks you into the shower wall. If someone were to ask about this very moment, you weren’t too sure how you’d defend yourself. A moment of weakness, perhaps? But if a moment of weakness felt this fucking good every time, you might fall into a habit of judgment lapses.

He nuzzles his face in the crook of your neck, nibbling and biting your shoulder and the surrounding area with each snap of his hips. The angle he drives into you at has stars forming at the back of your vision, the tip of his cock brushing that one spot deep inside of you whenever he thrusts up. You don’t even think his entire dick is in you as he does this, but you also don’t really have the mind to care, way too focused on memorizing the veins of his shaft with your walls.

You’re far too gone to consider the consequences of your actions, the horizon of your release just beyond your fingertips now. You’d never needed someone so viscerally before, so carnally. Yet here you were, sucking Lee Juyeon’s cock in with your pussy like you were a damn vacuum. The sounds you’re making bounce back and forth on the walls, no doubt louder than the shower water itself.

“I— I-I’m so— fuck,” you mewl, words wobbling. “I’m so, so close, Juyo.”

“Yeah, baby?” He sighs in your ear, nudging your sensitive clit with his thumb while raising your leg as much as he physically can. “Me too, where do you want me?”

“Inside,” you don’t think you even make sense anymore, babbling as he continues to fuck you stupid. “Please. Want you to cum inside me.”

Juyeon grits his teeth, pleased with himself that he didn’t orgasm right then and there. He uses his last ounce of strength to get the two of you off together. “C’mon, sweetheart, cum for me.”

The fogginess subsides pretty quickly after you’ve finished, your brain registering what just happened almost instantaneously. If you weren’t so hypersensitive, you would’ve pulled him out yourself and scrambled to flee the scene. (And maybe even the country.) There are many more rational thoughts running through your head now. The entire trajectory of your life has just been changed, whether you realized it or not. But the biggest issue was:

What the hell do you do now?

#the boyz #the boyz x reader #the boyz smut #tbz #tbz x reader #tbz smut #the boyz juyeon #tbz juyeon #lee juyeon x reader #lee juyeon smut #juyeon x reader #juyeon smut #juyeonszn #juyeonszn.100🪩

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svnluns · 7 months ago

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⋆ fuck ur boyfriend

I was sitting at the end of the stairs, crying my eyes out at this party. I thought that partying would have cleared my mind after my boyfriend broke up with me but ig no.

I pulled out my phone out of my pocket and scrolled a bit on it.

I then caught a shadow approaching me. I looked up from my phone and looked at the girl in front of me.

I knew her since a few years now because we have always ended up in the same classes but i never really talked to her, mostly because i didn’t really care.

“Hey, whats up? Ur good?” She says, looking at me with pity.

“Yeah im fine” I answered, wiping my tears away and setting my phone on my lap.

She sat next to me and looked at me.

“You don’t seem ok, your eyes are all red, like you’ve been crying for weeks, whats the matter?”

She seemed actually “worried”. Maybe i should open up, i mean it’s no harm.

“My boyfriend broke up with me” I say, sniffing.

“Damn, i’m sorry, i’m sure is an asshole, u deserved better anyway” she says looking at the crowd of people dancing and then at me.

I didn’t really know what to say. She had a point, I put so much effort into this relationship for nothing.

“You want a drink or something?” She says, taking me out of my thoughts.

“Yes thanks Billie” I say with a weak smile.

She turned her head to me and looked at me with a confused look.

“How do you know my name?” She says.

“We’ve been in the same classes for years, i might have never talked to you but i remember your name eh”

“hmm” was all she said, turning her head and walking away.

We ended up in the kitchen. She took 2 red cups and poured some vodka and some coke.

“fuck your boyfriend, just have some fun tonight, you will have time to cry about it tomorrow” She says with a smile.

“fuck him, he wasn’t even good in bed” I say with a chuckle.

“that’s what i like to hear” Billie answered with a smile.

She grabbed my wrist, and dragged me into the living room where people were dancing and drinking.

Billie started to dance with me, grabbing both of my hands and spinning me around. I started laughing before i could stop myself.

Her smile defined that seeing me smile tonight was all she had hoped for.

“See you’re finally smiling, i’m glad that i could have helped you clear your mind”

We then stopped dancing and she leaded me to get some air. My head was spinning and that’s exactly what i needed. It feels like she was reading my mind.

We sat on a chair and she spoke again.

“Are you feeling better now? Please tell me that you don’t think about him anymore, i did everything that i could to make you feel better tonight” She says playfully.

“I am in fact feeling better, thanks you so much, i own you”

“Nah don’t worry about it, you’re good” She says, looking at me up and down.

I knew what was about to happen already, how she was looking at me meant only one thing.

She leaned in and kissed me. She kissed me with passion, like it’s one of the things that she wanted to do tonight beside making me happy.

I kissed her back and positioned my legs on her lap.

As we kissed, I felt a rush of emotions and a burning desire that I hadn’t felt in a long time. Her hands roamed over my body with a hungry urgency, and I knew exactly what i wanted.

Without breaking the kiss, she stood up, pulling me with her, entering the house, we were giggling while making our way to one of the empty rooms in the house.

As we entered the room, she pushed me against the door and pressed her body against mine, her hands roaming under my shirt and sending shivers down my spine.

I had no idea that this would have happened tonight, and i hid no idea that she could make me feel that way.

She pulled me closer, her lips finding mine in another passionate kiss. Her hands wandered down my body, touching every inch of my skin with a hungry touch. Her touch made me shiver, and a low moan escaped my lips.

She smiled, her fingers tracing over my stomach and trailing down to the waistband of my jeans.

She slides her hand down in my jean, and started to touch my pussy, rubbing her hand on it.

She unbuttoned my jeans and pulled my thong to the side, so she could have a better look of what she was doing.

A few moans escaped my lips as she was now kissing me to keep me quiet.

I couldn’t stop arching my back, she knew exactly what she was doing, her fingers moving with an expert precision that made my legs tremble.

“You’re so sensitive, i love it. She whispered.

#billie eilish #billie eilish fanfiction #billie eilish fic #billie eilish x fem!reader #billie eilish x reader #billie eilish x you #billie eilish x female reader #billie eilish fluff #billie eilish smut #billie eilish x y/n #svnluns

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thatlotuscookie · 2 months ago

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omg hii i love ur writing so so much😭😭 literally hope u win the lottery or smth 😭 but can u do Woo jin-chul hcs with someone whose like shockingly really shy around other people but complete opposite with him? just fluff for my underrated king😞

✧･ﾟ: a/n: thank you thank you im so glad you enjoy reading ^_^ jin-chul is so handsome!! i really like his nose. anyway, enjoy :< ALSO GANG HOW IS THERE NO GIFS OF THIS GUY???

Woo Jin-Chul x !FemReader (introverted hcs)

Only Bold Around Him

Jin-Chul noticed it right away. Around others, you’re quiet—almost timid. You shrink back when people talk too loudly, and group conversations? You’re more likely to quietly nod than speak up. But the moment you’re alone with him? You’re teasing, giggling, even dramatic sometimes, and it always catches him off guard in the best way. He finds it adorable—the way you light up just for him.

He Never Pressures You in Public

He never tries to push you into being more outgoing in front of others. If you cling to his sleeve at a guild meeting, he gently lets you, shielding you as best he can. He’ll handle the talking, the social part—you just stick close. He gets that you don’t need to be “fixed,” just understood. And he’s proud to be the one person you feel completely safe around.

Softest Smiles Just for You

Obviously this man is known for being quiet and serious, but you’re the exception. Around you, his smile comes out more easily, more often. When you say something silly or when you whisper a joke only he can hear, he gives you this fond, secret smile—the kind no one else gets to see.

His Favorite Sound? Your Laugh

Especially when it comes out after you’ve been shy and quiet all day. When the two of you are finally alone and you flop onto the couch and start rambling about how insanely awkward you felt around everyone, he just listens with soft eyes and an arm slung around you. He loves hearing your voice go from shy whispers to unfiltered rants. To him, your laugh is gold.

Protective, But in a Quiet Way

He doesn’t make a big deal about it, but Jin-Chul is very aware of your discomfort around strangers. If you’re out in public and someone makes you uneasy, he steps between you and them without hesitation. He’s not loud about it—he just has that calm authority that makes people back off. And he always checks in with a subtle, “You okay?”

Takes You on Private Dates

No crowded restaurants or loud bars. He plans quiet rooftop dinners, cozy at-home movie nights, or peaceful walks through empty parks. Anything that lets you be yourself, without all the pressure. And he loves how you open up more and more with each one.

Proud to Be Your Safe Space

He treasures the fact that you trust him enough to drop the shy act and just be silly, clingy, affectionate—even chaotic sometimes. Whether it’s you making bad puns, jumping on his back like a koala, or dramatically fake crying because he stole your fries, he takes it all in stride. You’re his, and he wouldn’t want you any other way.

It was late by the time you and Jin-Chul got home from the guild gathering, and you were absolutely drained. The socializing, the forced smiles, the small talk—it took everything in you not to bolt out the door after the first hour.

The second the door shut behind you, you let out a dramatic groan and dropped face-first onto the couch.

"I'm never doing that again," you mumbled into a pillow. "Literally someone asked me what I do for fun and I panicked and said taxes. Taxes, Jin-Chul."

He chuckled softly behind you, loosening his tie and walking over. "I think that’s the worst thing you’ve said since you told that one guy you were ‘emotionally unavailable like a broken vending machine.’"

You popped your head up, fake-glaring. “That was a moment of brilliance, thank you very much.”

Jin-Chul just smiled, reaching down to brush your hair back gently. “You did great. I’m proud of you.”

You let out a dramatic sigh and rolled onto your back so he could sit beside you. “They all think I’m some weird antisocial mouse. Meanwhile you get the real me—chaotic goblin edition.”

“I like the chaotic goblin,” he said calmly, settling beside you and pulling you against him. “She’s my favorite.”

You snuggled into his side, voice muffled against his chest. “Good. ‘Cause I’m never going to be normal around you again.”

He chuckled again, rubbing slow circles into your back. “That’s exactly what I was hoping for.”

And for the rest of the night, with your giggles echoing off the walls and your limbs tangled up on the couch, you let yourself be loud. Be playful. Be you—the version only he got to see.

And he wouldn’t trade it for the world.

#anime #woo jinchul #woo jinchul x reader #woo jinchul headcanons #solo leveling headcanons #solo leveling fluff #solo leveling comfort #fluff #fluff/comfort #manhwa x you #manhwa x reader #solo leveling #solo leveling arise #sung jin woo #jinwoo sung

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airbendertendou · 2 years ago

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a small compilation of moments between autistic!reader + connor happy disability pride month <3

anon requested : hi! i was wondering if you could do something with connor and the autistic reader and like them going nonverbal and how he would handle that? You don’t have to do it if you don’t wanna! :)

please do not use this as a way to self-diagnose. having one thing in common does not necessarily mean you are autistic. im not a therapist or doctor, if you think you’re on the spectrum, talk to them. <3

if you have a blank blog [no bio, no user, no header or profile pic, nothing reblogged, etc] do not interact with my content. you will be blocked.

temperature irregulation ♥︎

hank was a firm believer in a cold house. when the summer season came and brought a heatwave with it, the older man wouldn’t allow anything other than a brisk, chilly living room.

it was often you’d come over to go over old cases and study with hank. interning with the detroit police department was fun — the academy, however, you could live without. you’d learned to dress warm when visiting hank’s house, having a hard time warming up once you were cold.

“here,” a thicker sweater is placed over the couch, the sleeve laying on your shoulder. you take it without thought, swapping your thinner one for the new one. connor smiles at the pattern on your fuzzy socks, the sight of your toes curling in delight at the warmth bringing something tender to his brain. “better?”

you nod with a hum, “thanks, detective.”

hank rolls his eyes, hiding the curl of his lips at your obliviousness. “anyways, as i was saying—”

[interrupted] routine ♥︎

every day at 12:10 pm, you’d wander into the breakroom for a snack and drink refill. connor didn’t mean to memorize your specific regimen — but after watching you do the same thing for a week straight, it stuck to his mind.

you loitered in the doorway to the breakroom, peeking in occassionally to see if it’d emptied out any. gavin caught your gaze, rolling his eyes at your hesitance. it was then you spotted the mug in his hands — your mug, the one you always used. your frown deepened.

connor budged his way into the crowd, bumping into gavin and causing his drink to spill. every curse leaving the human’s mouth went ignored — connor only watched as you cowered away from gavin’s angry steps as he left. grabbing the dropped mug, connor rinsed it four times before holding it out to you shyly.

you crept into the breakroom, grabbing the handle of the mug and shooting the android a thankful grin.

stimming with pressure ♥︎

hank opened the door to his house with a sigh. connor’s eyebrows furrowed as he tilted his head, questioning the elder silently. hank leans against the door, “[name]’s been here a while, s’all. won’t leave my bathtub.”

a safe zone, connor concludes, somewhere small and compact ; where you could see every corner and every threat. he makes his way to the bathroom without another thought, pausing at the sight of you.

your eyes are closed, face crumpled in displeasure as you clench and unclench your fists in a pattern. connor knocks on the door, announcing his presence without startling you. your eyes fly open, “hello, detective.”

“you can call me connor, if you’d like.” the android steps further into the bathroom slowly, allowing you to object if you need to. your eyes stay on him — his thirium pump stutters in his chest. “anything i can do to help?”

taking in a deep breath, you puff your cheeks as you release the air. “maybe. if you don’t think it’s weird.”

connor stares down at you, his upper lip curled in hesitance as you lay in hank’s bed. you adjust yourself, wiggling around until you’ve splayed your limbs where you want them. you blink up at him, “well?”

“it is a little... strange.” connor tries to be nice, he really does. but asking an android to lay on you — to put their full weight on you — he’s concered. “i will crush you.”

you roll your eyes, “i have a weighted blanket at home ; it’s no different.”

“i weigh quite a bit more than—”

“are you going to lay on me or not, connor?”

maybe it was the sound of you saying his name for the first time ; maybe it was the way you looked so defeated. whatever it was, connor found himself laying on you as gently as he could. the relaxation was immediate — he could feel the breath of relief you let out ; the way your body sagged.

you fell asleep that way — with connor holding his breath and tensing up the closer you got.

sensory overload ♥︎

the scene you were going to was a lot. it was nighttime now, the sirens and flashing lights bringing everyone’s attention this way. hank leaves the car first, grumbling as he goes. the sound that leaks through his open door causes you to whimper.

connor turns his head to you, “everything alright?”

your gaze hasn’t left the window as you squint, blinking at all of the lights. you gulp before biting your lip. “i’ll be fine. this is what i signed up for.”

you’re barely out of the car and already wincing at the noise and the lights. you can’t see hank ; can’t hear or understand anything being said around you. the world is blinking in hues of red and blue, wailing sirens going off with every flash of the lights.

the sound grows muffled as soft and sturdy hands cup your ears. a thumb moves from your ear briefly, just long enough for you to hear a whisper. “close your eyes and i’ll lead you into the house. that’s where the lieutenant is.”

trusting connor’s words — a little too easily — you squeeze your eyes shut. your hands go up to cover his, sealing your ears from the harsh sounds around you. stumbling a little here and there, you eventually feel a difference in temperature as you enter the house.

letting out a sigh, your shoulders moving with the motion, slowly your eyes peel open. you glance at connor, ignoring the tenderness of his gaze. “thanks, connor.”

he lets out a deep breath, ignoring the sly grin hank sends his way. “no problem, [name].”

verbal shutdown ♥︎

it happened so quick. your safe foods had vanished from their designated cabinet ; your chair’s wheel was squeaking incessently ; hank hadn’t shown up today. everything was piling on and you finally exploded.

the evidence locker was empty as you shakily typed in hank’s password. you hit the wrong button a few times, squeezing your eyes together at the little beeps. your breathing picks up — you hold it in your chest and shake your hands, releasing the tension built inside you.

you all but crawl into the secure room, your back hitting the wall as you sit down. your eyes squeeze shut again and you go through the motions, choosing the less destructive ways to calm yourself down.

none of them work.

when connor finds you, you’re drawing shapes on the floor with your finger. you’ve curled into yourself, not making a sound ; your usual means of comfort absent from your lips. he walks to you cautiously, “[name]? hank has returned. he’s asking to see you.”

you don’t move ; not a sound falls from your lips. connor sits in front of you, crossing his legs as he waits. from his suit pocket comes a ring of multicolored notecards — your eyes flash to his at the sight of them. connor holds them out further so that you can see them properly. “want to use these?”

a miniscule nod, but it’s enough to make him smile. “alright,” he flicks through the blue cards — feelings. stopping at your set of upset verbs, he slides the ring your way. “any of these describe how you’re feeling?”

a shaky finger hits the word overstimulated before dragging over to panic. connor nods, flipping to the pink set — solutions. “what do you want to do? go home ; nap ; have a snack ; get your puzzle book ; coloring book...” connor holds them up to you, reading out each one until you nod — except you don’t. pausing, connor speaks up again, “want me to leave?”

you shake your head. slowly, your hand crawls across the floor until it meets his. you nudge his hand, curling your fingers under his. connor holds his breath, adjusting your fingers until you’re holding hands properly. his eyes stay to the floor, “this is okay, too. let me know when you’re ready to leave.”

emotional regulation ft. lots of crying ♥︎

“connor,” your voice brings him out of his work. standing beside his desk, connor watches as you sway side to side. he tilts his head and it makes your eyes water. “i’m going to cry.”

that was his cue to take you into his arms. connor stands to do so, gathering your body against his and rocking you side to side slowly. your body hiccups a few times, sniffles leaving your nose occassionally. you seem to calm down even more as he rubs your back soothingly — connor’s led light flashes yellow as he stores that information for later.

you pull away with a deep breath, rubbing your face with the hoodie you’re wearing. connor frowns, “better?”

you nod, “needed that. thank you.”

“want to tell me what upset you? only if you want to.”

connor never knew what to expect your answer to be. sometimes you just shook your head and snuggled close to him again. other times, you did talk about why you were crying and it made connor realize the extent of human emotions.

“no more chocolate in the snack cabinet.”

“had a nice dream.”

“hank is wearing yellow.”

“it’s such a pretty day today!”

“too much noise.”

“gavin cut his hair.”

you let out another sniffle, lips pouting in thought. “not too sure this time. jus’ felt like i needed to cry.”

connor nods to himself, his led light whirring yellow once more. “i’m glad you feel comfortable with me, [name]. i’ll be here if you need another cry.”

you grin, meeting his eyes for a brisk second before reaching out to hold his hand. you swing your entwined hands lightly, grin softening into something gentle. “i know. thanks, con.”

the detective was sure he’d implode because of you soon. just not yet — not when you’re still holding his hand.

——♥︎—— for some reason my brain tells me to only write autistic readers n pair them w connor. like?? work w me here!! anyways. i hope this was okay, remember to take your meds, drink some water and have a nice snack!! airbendertendou © do not copy, plagiarize, repost, or translate my content on any platform. if you see my content under any other name than my own, let me know. i only have this tumblr and an ao3 account under the same name.

#connor imagine #connor x reader #dbh connor x reader #dbh connor imagine #autistic!reader #autistic reader #dbh x reader #detroit become human imagine #detroit become human x reader #connor headcannons #connor drabbles #dbh drabbles #dbh imagine #detroit become human drabbles

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prettyboykatsuki-moved · 1 year ago

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⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ SHARPEN YOUR TEETH (AND BITE AS HARD AS YOU WANT) | WYLL RAVENGARD

☾ tags ; SPOILERS FOR ACT ONE AND TWO OF BG3, gn + afab!reader, werewolf!reader, selunite cleric!reader developing relationship, canon typical violence, mild gore / blood, mutual pining, heat cycles, scent kink, oral (f + m!recieving), unprotected sex, praise kink, petnames (starlight, my love, my heart), lots of referring to reader as a dog / mutt / puppy, messy sex, reader has body hair / pubic hair, soft top wyll, a single pregnancy joke, 18+ MDNI

☾ wc ; 21.8k (????)

☾ a/n ; h...hello wyll nation. local deranged man here to offer this politely and run away. i dont really know what happened here. this was really just meant to be porn about a scent kink and uhm. well

i dont know if i wrote this fic as much as it used my physical vessel as a way to escape. it just sort of occured. im rarely nervous to post fic for a character but this is my first time doing a real wyll fic and bg3 fandom as many people i respect. so please be kind.

anyways. the embracing of monstrosity vs the rejection of it. so on and so forth. hope u enjoy. also banner is from slime isekai anime.

☾ synopsis ; there's a werewolf at camp. nothing new. wyll is growing increasingly fond of them. very new.

ao3 link for reading | spotify playlist.

The violent tearing sounds of teeth ripping through the flesh pulse and echo through the night air.

Blood sprays onto the furred creature responsible for it. All else grinds to a halt, the gnats and fireflies silent in awe as sharp claws crush through bone. Wyll can hear the sound of his own blood pumping as his eyes watch the massacre, hand drawn on his rapier. He looks over through the rest of his party

They remain just as awestruck. Astarion stands breathlessly. Shadowheart slinks into her namesake, eyes closed and trembling in the dark.

But Wyll watches, eyes fixed on the bloodshed. On the violence. The realization dawns on him too late that one of his party members is missing. You’re missing. He stares back at the creature, underneath the moon - silently slaughtering every last of their opposition until the battle field is left in a field of crimson. Death plagues every inch of dirt to the naked eye.

A whimper sounds. Followed by the sound of skin and bones retracting and moving back into place.

Where a werewolf once was is your naked form. Sat on your knees and bent over your body with tears at the corners of your eyes. Just your ears and tail remain, your mouth and hands covered in a thick layer of blood. You sniffle, the only light left to illuminate you ritual candles and moon as you turn your head back to your party.

“Uhm,” Your voice is coarse, thick with exhaustion and tears. Wyll stares at you in awestruck silence “We should probably talk.”

“So,” Gale’s voice and the obvious exasperation in it is enough to make Wyll feel sorry for you. You’re sitting at the campfire, finally clothed - with a blanket around your shoulder and Astarion tending to your wounds. “We have a Sharran, a vampire spawn, a werewolf, and a githyanki. Anything else we need to check off before we apply for a tent at the circus?”

Karlach takes the empty seat next to you, wanting to wrap her hand around the fluffy base of your tail and frowning when she realizes she can’t. Your ears are folded down, the corners of your eyes still wet with tears. You lean into Karlach’s heat, just enough to feel it.

The air is cool, thick with the scent of dirt and smoke. The campfire licks with light flames, surrounded by half cut logs for extra seating. You, Astarion, and Karlach crowd on a single half - draped with an extra bedroll for cushion.

“Don’t be so harsh on them, Gale,” Karlach says, glancing over at you “It’s hardly like they’re a threat to us. I mean.. look at them.”

Your frown deepens as you hang your head in shame.

“I thought we were past this, no? I mean we’ve all already been honest with each other so far. It’s a little late to be keeping something like this a secret is it not?”

“That’s true,” Wyll interjects, standing next to Gale across from the three of you - staring at your curled up form with sympathy. “I really don’t understand why you hid it for this long. Surely, you could’ve told us earlier?”

Your voice is weak and unusually frail. “The opportunity never presented itself.”

“You could have mentioned it when Astarion told us he was a vampire?” Wyll suggests.

“I didn’t want to steal his thunder, you know? Felt a bit rude, really.”

Astarion laughs, clearly wanting to laugh himself into hysterics but having enough tact not to do so. “Not a thing in that head of yours aside from our parasite, is there darling? But you know, I’m quite delighted by this revelation.

“Really?”

“Now we’ve got two monsters at our camp as opposed to just one! Evens out the playing field, in case things go south.”

“I’m not a monster,” You murmur, pouting. “And I don’t think you are either, for the record. I’m just a shifter. And my goddess is kind.”

“Oh? And who would that be?” Gale asks somewhat bitterly.

“Selune,” Shadowheart pipes up this time, for the first time since your arrival back to camp. Emerges from her own tent in the corner like a ghost. Her arms are crossed, brows pinched into a tight face of displeasure “She has a network of werewolves in her ranks. You’re one of them, aren’t you?”

You look up at her saddened, like a kicked puppy for lack of a better word, casting your gaze away from hers. Shadowheart looks ferocious, her appearance locked onto your pitiful form with a familiar angry smolder. Wyll can’t decide if you’ve done anything so grand as to earn her ire, even if you’re a Selunite werewolf. Though, given all that Wyll knows about her, that may as well be the greatest sin of all.

Your voice is tiny and high-pitched as you play with your hands in your lap “I didn’t intend to hide it from you but y-yes. I don’t bear any hatred towards you or other Shar followers, but uhm, well, I didn’t think you’d be very happy about it. A-and then, well you know, back in the grove you mentioned you hated wolves so, I just… planned on never shifting.”

“You have control over something like that?” Wyll inquires. You nod, not looking up at him.

“I was born as a werewolf, not turned. So the moon doesn’t affect me in the same way it would someone who was turned and I have more control over when it happens. I can shift in and out. Usually no problem but when I’m caught off guard like that,” You lift your tail and swing it from side to side as if to emphasize the point “Sometimes I mess it up.”

“Chk. What a waste of ability. Think of how many we would’ve slaughtered had we known from the start.”

Wyll looks around. Everyone has gathered now, standing around the fire.

“A werewolf… I know little of them. Wild shape magic is vastly different. I hope your condition does not cause you too much trouble. Or us, for that matter.” Halsin adds apologetically.

“I didn’t intend for it to come out this way,,” You mumble pitifully. Shit, he really can’t help but feel bad. “I really did fully plan on keeping it to myself until the end. But, well, we were desperate. And I didn’t want to see anyone die,”

“Given our circumstances, I think it would be amiss to scold you for your bravery,” Wyll supplements, trying to ease your worries. He does mean it. Regardless of what happened, you did save everyone. “Plus, we’ve all kept secrets here.”

“Exactly right, soldier. Don’t beat yourself up about it,”

“Wow, what sort of double standard is this? When I came out as a vampire, you people couldn’t stop talking about how afraid you were I was going to bite you!” Astarion says with an exaggerated frown. You smile at him weakly.

Wyll gives him a disbelieving look. “Well you’re not exactly subtle about wanting to suck our blood, are you Astarion?”

Astarion huffs. “Everyone here is so unfair.”

Wyll laughs goodnaturedly, his eyes turning back onto you. He examines you in silent thought, his mind sifting over your last few months together.

After Gale gets over his initial frustration, his curiosity gets the better of him. He rejoins everyone—across from you on an empty log and Wyll joins along with them. Shadowheart and Lae-zel come too, as does Halsin.

Around the campfire, Gale pulls a book and quill from his tent before making himself comfortable.

“Well since we’ve all made up, I am a little curious about your condition.” He admits. A very Gale thing to do, Wyll thinks.

“I don’t mind any questions.” You reply gently. “It’s the least I can do.”

The whole camp softens at your display. Surprisingly, Shadowheart is the first to ask a question.

“Is it more comfortable for you…in your wolf form?”

You seem taken aback.. Though it dawns on you quickly why she would be asking that specifically.

“Ah, kind of? My humanoid form is also me but it feels… limiting at times.”

“Limiting?”

“Eating meat without my canines is a pain in my ass. Same with not being able to express myself with my ears or tail. I like traveling on my paws depending on the terrain.” You say, shaking your head. “It doesn’t bother me though mostly,”

Gale’s quill hitting the paper makes a loud scratching sound. Astarion has a snarky comment about it that Wyll misses. He’s too preoccupied with other things.

Hoping that you don't feel too badly about all this, for example.

“Does it affect your daily life in any way?”

“I don’t think so? I don’t know. It’s always been like this, so there’s nothing that different to me. I do notice how different I am around humans maybe,” You say, before perking up. You’ve just remembered something important. “Oh, but there is one thing.”

“What is it?” Wyll asks.

“My senses are much much sharper than other peoples. My sense of smell, especially.”

___

You remain together. Despite the mess. Somehow.

With this parasite in mind, and nothing left to lose - it’s better to stay together. Now that there are no important secrets kept hidden, the vibe is much more relaxed. The impending doom adds a layer of familiarity too. Wyll has often traveled with bands of strangers, but never for so long and with so many.

It gives him a sense of familiarity. Home. What a foreign word.

He thinks a lot of it is your contribution. They’re your pack, as you say so often. A special one with lots of different sorts of people. And you - you’re loyal to a fault. It helps. You and Karlach are a lot alike, but Wyll would venture to call you a little more tender. It helps fill in the gaps.

Wyll knows you’re a werewolf but it’s hard not to think of you as a dog in that sense. A different dog to Scratch, maybe. But a dog all the same - with folded ears and a softail and propensity for drooling depending on the way you sleep.

He’s only really reminded of the fact that you’re part wolf when you use your abilities in battles. It’s your failsafe. You only do it when you think it’s dire, and before that you air on the side of diplomacy. You’re a hunter should the need arise though. Sometimes you don’t transform completely. Where your usual canines are meant to linger in your mouth are a set of teeth too big for it. Instead of hands, sometimes there are soft paws with sharpened nails.

There are three ways you can transform for that matter. Human, werewolf, or just wolf. Wyll finds these little distinctions fascinating, and more fascinating that you tend to opt for one end of the spectrum or the other.

Wyll quickly learns some of your physical attributes are the same irregardless of what you look like. The fact you are agile and quick and strong, or the fact you can travel fast on all fours. The fact you like meat, and the fact you whine rather loudly when you’re upset.

When you’re using your abilities, many would think you a ruthless killer.

But after everyones cleared from harm, you’ll transform back into your usual human self - naked and covered in blood and frowning. You spit up meat that tastes bad and whine loudly if no one tells you good job.

(That job often falls on Wyll or Shadowheart. Gale or Karlach if they’re traveling with you. Astarion is only kind enough to do it in a semi-mocking way, but Wyll is keenly aware of how sincere his praise can be.)

In moments like that, you’re just a dog again. A puppy, sometimes. Loyal. And novel, and interesting for many reasons.

Wyll should expect your loyalty by now. He sees it so often, how unyielding and faithful you always are. To your goddess and to your pack and to whatever else you’ve deemed important to you.

He should’ve known that you’d probably try to seek him out tonight, after everything that’s happened among all of you.

He did watch you for a bit at the start. You worked clockwise through all of your companions, stopped in between for stories and gossip. Some of the tiefling kids wanted to see your tail and you’re too good a spirit to tell them no.

Wyll wouldn’t dare hope for you finding him, but he is a little relieved when you do.

“Wyll! There you are,”

Wyll’s eyes snap up.

“Ah, Hells. I was hoping you wouldn’t notice I was gone,” He says regretfully.

“Of course I noticed! How could I not notice our very own warlock disappear? It was no party without you.”

Wyll wonders if you’re being sincere. He hopes you are. The night air is cool as the two of you share space. Away from the party, only sand and rubble between your feet. And a body of water that looks like it could go on forever.

It’s a full moon tonight.

“Really? I’m honored,” He peers out into the lake. Suddenly aware of his body, Wyll recoils into himself. The movement is subtle enough to be overlooked. The horns on the top of his head feel especially heavy. The skin pulled around the base of them throbs. It’s not painful, but it is unpleasant. “In truth, I don’t feel a festive mood and I didn’t want to cast a gray cloud over the night.”

“Is it too intrusive for me to ask?”

“Not at all,” Wyll assures. Your words are comfortable and soft, concerned without being pitiful. “I’m a devil. I love the people of the grove, but I unsettle them deep down. As I seem to unsettle everyone nowadays.”

Wyll can hear his own somber. He doesn’t wince, but it's impossible to ignore. Even explaining himself only adds to his melancholy. He’s quiet for a while, his voice touched with a destitution and irony. And bitterness, maybe.

You remain still and steady beside him. He can’t tear his gaze away from the endless water, comforted by its vastness. How it generally disregards him and distorts his reflection.

“You don’t want a devil at your party. Horns this sharp will pop the balloons you see. And the guests won’t take kindly to scars quite so monstrous.” He jokes, trying to keep his voice light.

He doesn’t think he succeeds at it.

Silence once more. Wyll can see you, but your expression is unchanged. Your eyes are clear underneath the ever changing moon.

“You don’t unsettle me. You never have.” There’s conviction behind your words. They comfort him.

“If only half the world had half the heart you do.” Wyll tells you, and means every word. He tries to brighten up, waving you off. “Don’t let my introspection spoil your night. Off with you. This is your day! Have a dance. Enjoy the music.”

He hopes it’s enough to get you to forget about him for tonight.

When you walk off, Wyll is expecting you to disappear. It’s enough that you’ve checked on him. He would’ve been content with it, left to reflect on his troubles alone. You’ve done something significant with your reassurance. He isn’t so tactless to keep you from celebrating. even when he would maybe want more time with you.

You return to him though. With a bottle of wine, and a bedroll you spread in the empty sand next to him. You give him an unreadable look followed by a cheeky smile, making yourself comfortable on the ground.

“Come on. Sit.”

Confused, Wyll sits. You open the bottle of wine with your teeth as a cork and drink from the top before passing it over to him. He takes it from you and stares at the place you’ve just drank from. You start to talk while he debates mimicking you.

“You don’t have to pretend it’s less difficult than it is,” You say almost thoughtlessly. Almost. “You’ve lost your body. Yourself. That must be hard.”

Wyll looks at you, then back at the colored glass of the bottle. He clears his throat. “It is. More than I imagined it to be.”

“You know, I was born a werewolf. And I had just about the best circumstances a person could have with that in mind. Selune accepts me and my clergy was mostly kind. Still, I heard the word monster a lot from people outside my circle. I could feel the distrust that I incited in outsiders. So, I won’t pretend to know exactly what you’re going through,” You say, your legs stretched out far into the sand, past the confinement of a tiny square bedroll “But I do know what it’s like to feel accused when you’ve done nothing wrong. You especially, Blade of Frontiers. I think you’re allowed to grieve the trust it feels like you’ve lost, or might lose. If it’s worth anything, though, I know you’re not a monster.”

Wyll barely gets a chance to process the words as they come. He wonders if this is what people mean by feeling seen by someone else. “You know?”

“Damn right I know,” Your response comes without hesitation. The night air blows along his skin, a soft and tender caress. Wyll frowns when you don't elaborate.

“How could you know something like that?” He asks.

“Lotsa reasons. You’re still nice and thoughtful and caring and charming. But, hm, well the most obvious reason is a little more primitive.” You take a deep inhale. “Your scent,”

“...I’m sorry?”

Your laugh is bright, and bubbly.

“Your scent,” You repeat calmly, taking a deep sigh after saying it. “Everyone at camp has a scent. It’s a little abstract, but they change when people change. Shadowheart smells the leaves of black currant and uh, Halsin smells like sequoia wood. Lae’zel smells like black tea and metal. Gale smells like licorice. Astarion smells a lot like applemint. Karlach smells like smoke and star anise,”

Wyll finds himself both awestruck and amused.

“These are all rather specific,”

“I’ve always been a bit of a bloodhound so I’ve developed a talent at identifying specifics. It was shitty when I was a runt. Even a trip outside could give me the worst fuckin’ headache, but it got better the more I got used to it.” You give Wyll a glance “Anyways. Scent changes. When someone changes, their scent does too. Moods and days and everything affect it too.”

“And mine hasn’t changed, is what you’re saying?”

“No. Not in the way that’d make you different. It’s stronger, but it hasn’t changed. You haven’t changed.” You say quietly, and take a deep breath. “Not to me at least.”

“You’ve conveniently left out my scent from your description.” Wyll says with fond amusement. He feels reassured. It’s absurd, yet Wyll is so inclined to believe you. “Is it something so awful?”

You flush, suddenly becoming timid.

“Yours is… good,” You say simply, and softly. You seem embarrassed to continue. He can’t help but find it so incredibly endearing. “It’s just harder for me to describe. But it’s good. It’s personally my favorite. “

You add the last part a little quieter.

“And it hasn’t changed,” Wyll says more than asks this time.

“No. Stronger, but the same.” You curl in on yourself, crossing your legs as you turn your head to face him, head tilted towards one side with a smile. “You’re not a devil to me. Just Wyll. And I like just Wyll.”

Wyll feels his chest tight as you lean your head on your shoulder contentedly. He tries not to read it into, hoping you can’t hear how loudly his heart is pounding. He takes a drink from the wine bottle straight, the same place your lips touched moments ago.

He likes you, too. The words don’t come out right.

“Yes…I’m,” He’s speechless, hands folded in his lap as he stares at you. “Me too. Our journey together has proved important to me. Thank you.”

You smile but don’t say anything more.

___

With the goblin camp clear, the journey towards the Shadowfell lands becomes increasingly pervasive. You’ve done more traveling and less resting in the last few weeks than you have thus far in your journey.

Smoke clouds in the horizon are what draw you to Waukeens rest.

On your way to the mountain pass, for easy access to the city, lay a massacre of bodies and fire. The distress has far from subsided. The thick smog continues to build, folds into itself like massive heaps of wool - suffocating everything on every path in its surroundings. The smell of ash is invasive, even from a fair distance away.

Blood trails from one end of the path towards the main entrance. As your party’s distance begins to close in, Wyll feels his lungs fill up with a familiar tightness. The burning air makes his eyes and lungs sting.

“Shit, the fire is still burning. There must still be people in need of aid. We should,” You cough hard as you look at what's in front of you. Eyes squinted trying to make out the horizon. “We should get there and see if we can aid them,”

Astarion groans “For just one day, could we rest? Leave this nonsense up to the other wandering travelers desperate for recognition? Is that asking so much?”

“As long as I’m pinning down bodies for you to feed off, you’ve got to listen to me, you know? You laugh warmly at his sarcasm. “Now, If you don’t stop complaining you’ll fall behind, pretty boy, and there’ll be not a thing left for you to suck dry.”

“I should report you for that, you know. Threats of starvation against the imprisoned violate the law,”

You laugh a little as you start to make your way forward. The four of you jog towards the entrance of Waukeens rest with urgency, more yours and Wyll’s than Astarion’s and Shadowheart’s.

Among the scenery at the front entrance of Waukeens rest - what concerns Wyll most is not the death. Not the bodies ashen among flame or the flames themselves that continue to widen and encompass. It is that, among those bodies, are members of the Flaming Fist. Past the sour memory of his life comes the worry, the fear.

What in the Hells are the Flaming Fist doing around this area?

Away from the woman praying over a body, are a small number of Fist’s pushing on the doorway of a locked and burning building. You’re quick to run to it. Wyll barely keeps up.

Before you can ask about the situation at hand, a Flaming Fist member addresses you and your party.

“Grand Duke Ravengard could be inside, don’t just stand there - push!”

Wyll’s voice betrays him, speaking before he has a minute to think. “Ravengard? He’s here?”

“Yes, now make yourself useful- push, damn it, push!”

Wordlessly from next to him, you gear yourself up and push kick the door in. Strong enough that the wood crumbles to nothing, Wyll watches the doors open wide and the flames that lick at the inside of the building. A cloud of smoke billows out as the Flaming Fist pour in, your party quick to follow in alongside them.

Through the thickets of smoke and up stairs half-broken, sounds Counselor Florrick's voice from behind the broken door. Maneuvering through ember and broken floorboard, you proceed the same as you did before. Pushing through the crowd of people surrounding the door - you use your foot and kick the door in again, causing it to break nearly instantly.

Counselor Florrick coughs as she makes her way outside.

“Come. I’m afraid proper thanks must wait,” She says with a heaved breath. It’s too clouded with smoke for Wyll to make anything of her face and Wyll can only assume that is the case both ways.

Back down through the way you came, you take a deep inhale of smoke and cough. The scent must be nauseating, far too much for you - but you don’t let it show through your face.

Once everyone has been accounted for outside, Counselor Florrick approaches your party in the broad daylight of the courtyard. It’s there she recognizes Wyll.

“Hold on,” Wyll says, reaching into his pack. He hands you a sachet of herbs he’d purchased alongside you from a merchant in the goblin camp. “For your nose,”

You give him a look of surprise, your ears perking up and tails swishing as you take it from him gratefully, holding it up to your nose for a deep breath.

“Fuck, thank you.” You reply gratefully. Wyll nods in reply.

“Counsellor Florrick - are you alright?” Wyll says first, concern pouring through. Regardless of all else.

It’s clear right away, the horror in his face once she’s seen what’s become of him. Wyll lets it roll off of his back, the momentary sting not enough to make him flinch. It’s a reminder to start adjusting to what will be one of many.

Her sympathy is tangible, though it doesn’t make Wyll feel better.

“Wyll - by the Maimed God, what’s become of you?”

He shakes his head to dismiss the thought. “A story best left for calmer days. Now breathe deeply, are you in pain?”

“A scorched throat, a few hairs singed off. Nothing a bit of time and fresh air can’t cure.”

Wyll’s shoulder sag with relief. She turns to address the Flaming Fist accompanying her.

“Gauntlet, a new duty calls. Drow have taken Grand Duke Ulder Ravengard - westward if my eyes and ears can be believed.” She pauses, thinking before giving further instruction “Report to the manip and send for reinforcements. We must find the Grand Duke.”

“On your command, Counsellor.” The head of the Gauntlet affirms, bowing their head before taking off.

It’s there that Wyll feels panic. Uncertainty like nothing he’s felt in the last seven years. Maybe longer. No longer a passing thought or a sour memory, concern for his father washes out what might’ve been grief.

“No. It can’t be. You mean, they’ve taken -”

Counselor Florrick's expression darkens. “Yes, Wyll. The drow have your father.”

“Shit, what? Wyll, you’re a noble?” You interject for the first time in the conversation. When Wyll turns to you, above all else is concern. He shakes his head.

“The circumstances of my birth are no matter of pride for neither me nor my father. But pride is no reason to refuse help to my own flesh and blood. How can we help?.”

“Rescue Ravengard from his drow captors. Baldur's Gate needs him, now more than ever,” She says, addressing you primarily and Wyll after. She pauses to examine Wyll a second time, like now that she’s out of the smoke she is really looking.

A passing glance of her brings back memories of a childhood long forgotten. Days spent in courtyards training the sword and waiting for father to finish his duties. An ache starts to form in the cavity of his chest, but Wyll swallows it.

Where duty calls, it is only common sense the Blade will answer. He holds a fist over his heart and bows.

“Trust us to see it through, Counsellor.”

“Who is this Duke Ravengard?” You ask, finally - though it’s not to him. Rather it’s to the Counselor. Wyll wonders if that’s a choice you’ve made on purpose.

“The invisible force holding Baldur’s Gate together. Without him, the city’s collapse is certain.” She pauses, looking troubled “I fear that may have been the intention of those who abducted him.”

“Shit. Then, not to be rude, but why entrust this to me? You have others at your command. More well equipped, I’d imagine,” You ask, bearing no hostility. A fair enough question for you, head of pack, with concerns for everyone else.

“Isn’t it clear? You travel with the Blade of Frontiers. Who might I trust, if not a legend? Who might rise to the moment, if not Ravengard’s own son?”

You pause to mull over her reply. Your brow is furrowed in concentration, before your focus returns to the Counselor.

“I don’t think the drow have taken him back to Menzoberranzan. More likely they’ve taken the Duke to Moonrise Towers.” You say tentatively. “Though Hells, I can’t be sure. Goblin’s bein’ here is weird and their affairs are tied together somehow. Plus, the drow we’ve met in this area so far have relations to other cultist bullshit,”

“I was thinking the same,” Wyll adds.

“Moonrise Towers? Along the old road? That place is cursed, few could survive there…unless darker forces are at work,” She pauses, taking a moment to assess the situation “This was no random attack, then. The Grand Duke was their target.”

After more deliberating, you look firmly at the Counselor and nod - a serious promise.

“Moonmaiden guide us - we’ll head to Moonrise towers and find Duke Ravengard. Though for now, I won’t promise anything.”

“Thank you. When the Grand Duke returns to the city, he’ll hail his only son a hero.” She says with a deep breath “Approach the towers with care. The land itself has been swallowed in shadow.”

She turns to address him this time “Remember Wyll. ‘Courage is found in the battle against fear, not in the defeat of it.’”

“So father said. I won’t soon forget it.”

“We’ll be heading off now, towards the towers. Take care of yourself.”

“You too, Counselor Florrick.”

With that, the Florrick disappears back out into the smoke and open road. Left in the aftermath is the rest of the party, not barring you - and Wyll with nothing but worry.

Your eyes find Wyll’s with ease, filled to the brim with concern. Wyll casts his gaze away instinctively.

“Shit,” Wyll swears, unsure of what the reaction from you will be.

“Wyll,” Your voice calls and soothes. Before his response forms in his mouth, he feels a hand on the nape of his neck. In a sudden movement, you lean into him. Even amongst the swallowing heat of fire and ember - Wyll is conscious of your skin. The scrapes and cuts on your fingers raised press against his own. You inhale a long breath and Wyll realizes what you’re doing. It’s confirmation when you pull away and glance at him seriously. “Can I trust you to tell me what’s going on?”

The question itself is exposing. It’s a raw nerve, split open, tender and unhealed. There’s no shame in it. Or maybe there is, always has been - and Wyll has spent nearly seven years outrunning it. This much he knows - he never intended to show you this part of himself.

And he knows that this is not the first time he’s betrayed your trust. You ask Wyll to trust you, and Wyll wants to explain he always has.

There is no betrayal in your face, no disappointment.

You come to him ready to receive anything. Crystal clear eyes and a sincerity in your heart - there is so much said in so little.

“I’m sorry. It was never,” He’s struck by grief in a sudden moment. You’re kind, but it goes well beyond just that. “I had no intent to hide it.”

“But you had no intent to share it either,” You say, your voice soft-spoken and tender. Forgiving, though you don’t make Wyll feel like there’s something he needs forgiveness for. “It’s okay. We’re damn similar sometimes aren't we?”

When you let go of Wyll, he stares at you. Wide-mouthed and unsure of himself. For a brief moment, his surroundings become blurry. There’s no one else in the party. There’s no smoke. There’s no fire. No ash. For a brief moment, there’s just you - and you’re smiling. You feel like forgiveness.

“Florrick spoke true,” Wyll affirms, unsure of what to do with himself. “I am a Grand Duke’s son.”

“Not just a grand duke - Ravengard has more power and influence than anyone.” Astarion adds.

“My father and I were close. Once upon a time. Until he disowned me and cast me out of Baldur’s Gate,” Wyll says with a hardened heart. He’s forgiven his father. He’s spent years rationalizing the choice he made. But he’s reminded in an instant that the wound is still tender. “I can’t tell you more - the pact forbids it. My lips are quite literally sealed.”

“Okay,” You give Wyll a look, clear and bright. “Then, Wyll - do you want to save your father?”

He wasn’t expecting that to be your only question. It must show that he’s taken aback, but you remain where you are unflinching.

“Yes, I—yes. Regardless of our relationship, he remains my flesh and blood.” You press your lips together, an encouraging half smile, prompting him. “And I don’t want him to fall into the hands of Absolutists for any reason. He made me an exile, but I’m not about to let him suffer at the hands of his captors.”

“Alright. Then we’ll save him,” You brush over the weight of that sentence, addressing your other companions. “The only lead we’ve got so far is Moonrise towers, so we’ll stick to our original plans. Visiting the creche and then traveling through the Underdark.”

Wyll stares at you as you continue to talk, the words feeling like little more than noise. Lost in thought, you let him remain undisturbed. When your eyes meet, you don’t do anything more than grin - fang poking out form underneath your lip.

And it’s the second time in his life, Wyll feels like you’re seeing something he can’t. Himself, maybe.

A confrontation with the githyanki and a red dragon later, you return to camp the night of visiting Waukeen’s rest.

When night falls, you join Wyll in his tent. The gesture is innocent. You ask about having a sleepover. Wyll tries to remember there’s nothing but friendship between you. Eventually helets you into the cramped space of his tent. There’s barely enough space for you both, but you manage.

Before bed, you ask Wyll to tell you about himself. Anything he can afford to tell you. For a long while, he talks about being the Blade of Frontiers. But then, when it’s late enough and the gap between you continues to shrink - he talks about his life in the city. It doesn’t happen on purpose. Wyll is hardly so ungentlemanly. It’s unlike him to cluelessly go on and on about himself.

You just happen to know exactly the right questions. Before Wyll knows it, he’s telling you about all of his escapades. His life as a nobleman's son and escaping to fraternize with lower city youth.

Wyll can’t disclose his pact to you, but he can tell you about the kiss he had at fifteen. He can tell you about the first time he lost a tooth, or describe the well-worn picture of his late mother in his fathers wallet. For a while, Wyll recounts tales of a life he’d thought he’d abandoned. When the words come out, they don’t feel like violence. Don’t coat his mouth with the bitter taste of iron. Instead they taste light like memories, and come out just as soft.

He doesn’t remember when either of you drift off to sleep.

When morning comes and Wyll finds you still in his tent, he feels the ability to claim plausible deniability drift away from him.

You mean more to him than he thought. The moment passes to tell you.

___

The journey to the Underdark is never an easy one.

Underneath the desecrated Selune temple was the beaten path. A long ladder down through a broken Selunite outpost. Not only have you all fought a spectator, a bullete, several hook horrors and an entire beach of duegars - you’ve just slaughtered an Absolutist leader with your bare hands.

The remaining duegar have fled the scene after a night to recover, leaving Nere’s body for the lot of you to loot. The gnomes have gone too. Wyll tries to hold confidence all of them will make it in one piece.

The Sovereign had made his request clear, slaughter Nere and bring his head. Wyll has watched you kill and devour several bodies in your time together, but there’s something novel about watching you do it now. A knife, pulled out from your sheath - sharp as it cuts and saws through the flesh. It’s a clean, precise slice. Nothing like you, Wyll thinks fondly.

He can surmise that it’s because you’re rather fond of the myconid colony. They’re kind to you and you are always fond of those who are kind. In that way you’re easy to appease. But he didn’t know you were capable of this level of care. You tend to be matted and ruddy. Generally messy.

Wyll likes you that way.

The head comes off the body unceremoniously. You wrap a cloth underneath the bottom, and tuck it in your pack along some cubes of ice you had Gale make you with magic that morning.

Wyll only sees the outline of your back. He watches as you stretch your palms out and examine them for blood. When you find none, you turn around with a little tired sigh.

Promptly, you prop yourself onto Shadowheart. Your ear and tails have made a reappearance, your chin resting on her shoulder.

“I'm tiiiiiiiiired,” You whine, long and drawn out. Your teeth stick out from your lips when you pout, Wyll notices. The heat of the forge and all of the surrounding lava have your skin sticky with sweat. The deep purple of the destroyed Sharran enclave feels out of place among the fires “I don’t want to go to the Shadowfell lands. I won’t. You can’t make me,”

You’ve picked up a habit of being touchy. You tend to cling to Shadowheart, which Wyll finds ironic. Even with her cold exterior, the half-elf doesn’t push you off when you hug or pester her. You make promises to Karlach you’ll join her for it once her engines all fixed. Lae’zel finds it pointless. Halsin doesn’t mind, and likes to turn into a bear so all the furry creatures at camp can turn into big pile.

Gale also doesn’t mind, but the wizard usually airs on the side of embarrassment - a faint blush crawling over him whenever you wrap yourself thoughtlessly about him. Astarion pretends to reject it, but willingly pets and scratches you when he feels less combative. Something you happily recieve.

And Wyll… well, it doesn’t bother him. You approach him often enough, and he’d be hard-pressed on a reason to reject you.

(He ignores the way your touch seems to linger, unsure if he’s seeing things that don’t belong. Wyll is fond of you. Your heart is good - he thinks of you often but he isn’t so sure that means something. Well it means plenty to him, but what of you?

You like the sensation of physical affection, he reminds himself Nevermind the times you’ve fallen asleep as a wolf in his lap. Nevermind the occasional naps in his tent, or whines when he’s too busy to pay you mind.)

“You’re not ferocious at all, do you know? More like a drooling mutt than a werewolf,” Shadowheart huffs sarcastically.

“What I lack in ferocity I make up for in vigor.” You reply with a hum, rubbing your cheek against Shadowheart’s shoulder. “And the situation doesn’t spark any vigor in me. We’ve already been underground this long and next we’re going somewhere even darker.”

Astarion pipes up, sitting criss-cross onto the marbled floor in one of the few spots free of blood, sorting through his varied belongings and trinkets. “I would figure werewolves and vampires share their love for the darkness, no?”

“We can’t see the moon well from either place. I need to see the moon to track some things related to my form. I count the phases in my head but if I don’t see it for too long - I start getting homesick like a man at sea.” You whine and huff again, this time peeling yourself off of Shadowheart and throwing yourself onto Wyll.

He steadies himself enough not to topple over by your strength and weight as you drape yourself across his back. You nuzzle your cheek against him tenderly. It’s different to how you do it to Shadowheart or Astarion (when he’s not adamantly pushing you away.) It’s more tender, closer. Your nose brushes against the nape of his neck. Wyll doesn’t flinch, even at the warmth of your breath. You inhale again and Wyll can hear the swish of your tail.

He pretends to be ignorant of it and doesn’t push you away - instead laughing lightly.

“Oh, Moonmaiden - let your moon be my light, and I shall let my sword be your shining symbol.” You recite with a sigh. The words reverberate along his skin. “Moon my love, you are terribly missed.”

“Keep your Selunite prayer out of my ears, would you?”

“Don’t be so moody, my cold blooded Sharran. Our Lady of SIlver is a kind and accepting goddess, so her blessing will extend even to you.”

Shadowheart crinkles her nose. You laugh noisily next to Wyll’s ear. He smiles softly.

“After we’ve delivered the head to the Sovereign, we can travel back overhead before going into the Shadowfell. That way, you’ve had some time with the moon and we’re able to get in more rest before taking it on,”

You pull away from him now, grabbing his shoulder to turn him around with a laugh. Wyll looks at you wide-eyed as you grin at him, knocking your foreheads together innocently.

“Ah, what a great idea! If everyone else is on board, then let’s make our way to the Sovereign now and recoup on the surface. We’ll return to Grymforge come mornin’ and head off that way. Is everyone on board with that?”

You look around for affirmation before resting your gaze on Wyll with a smile.

Wyll feels his heart tug slightly, returning your smile before averting his eyes. You scamper off to Astarion, attention easily pulled in every which way. Shadowheart saunters towards him.

“You’re rather obvious, Blade of Frontiers. I thought a folk hero would have a little more suave about these matters.”

Wyll clears his throat.

“...I don’t know what you’re referring too.”

Shadowheart laughs good-naturedly.

“Sure you don’t.”

___

There are few times you take your proper werewolf form.

It’s an accommodation thing from Wyll’s understanding. People are frightened less of full wolves or your humanoid forms. The hybridized version of yourself is what people find the most monstrous, and so - you’ve gotten used to putting on the shelf.

The only time you take that form is when you hunt for meat. It’s easy enough to get ahold of other camp supplies - like liquor or vegetables if they’re lucky. But meat is hard to find, especially hard to find where it hasn’t got spoiled. Astarion hunts only out of necessity, so he’s not really any help.

You hunt because it’s natural to you. A life of pilgrimage and spent in a Selunite enclave has gifted you the knowledge of preserving meats, too. When you’re camped out near enough forest - you’ll hunt. Most often before a long stretch of travel, you’ll go into the woods alone and disappear - returning with a feast. No one goes with you. In the forest, among fallen trees and soil - you’ll gut and skin the prey. You’ll bring back the final products, clean hides and things to turn to leather and meat ready for curing. It’s to prevent any more unusual bloodshed from occurring at camp. More sanitary, you always say.

Wyll has no intention of following you tonight while he knows you’re hunting. His interest in the woods is to scope them out one last time before you leave this place for good, keep it in his memory and prepare for the road ahead.

When he hears the sound of a faint growling, he thinks for a minute you’ve been injured or are in some kind of danger.

The moon is shining just enough to cast light on your form. He figures out quickly you’re safe.

There’s nothing new to see. Thick, crimson blood makes a mess of your appearance - dripping down your fangs. It sticks and matts in your fur, covering your face in messy splatters. Your werewolf form is your most monstrous. Unnatural limbs and features - a form like a human but the face and ferocity of a wolf.

In front of you are corpses of animals, bled out and laid in a pile. The scent of blood is so strong Wyll can smell it from a distance away. It’s a distance you’d usually be able to smell Wyll from, but it must be masked by the smell of copper and flesh.

The moon has waned, nearly to its fullest. You turn yourself towards the black sky of midnight, towards the moon - and you howl. It is a loud, tremendous sound.

Wyll has never heard you howl before. It’s the most beautiful sound he’s ever heard in his life. An elongated melody, deep from your chest - high and throaty. You howl to the sky. You howl to the moon. To your goddess, most certainly. You howl in the version of yourself everyone finds most disgusting. The monster in you is alive and bare-chested to the world. Stood on your two feet, all matted fur and eyes like beams of light - you howl towards the sky.

And Wyll watches. Listens. Commits the sound to memory.

In the version of yourself that is so embraced by monstrosity, you howl like a song to the moon you so adore.

He’s never found you so beautiful.

___

Time moves differently in the Shadowfell lands.

Slower. In every other part of Fae’run, the nights and days don’t blur into each other. But here, in the abandoned and unyielding darkness - everything feels thick. Muddy. The soil that does not dampen, the trees that do not grow leaves. Instead of preserved amber, there is only shadow. It swallows everything, every place in the land.

The upward battle of survival persists. The Harpers have (barely) welcomed you into the Last Light Inn. Flaming Fist Marcus is dead, and the Moon Maiden has given her her blessing. You’ve even been able to give Karlach her first upgrade.

The air speaks for itself though, that you’re nearing something important. The beginning of something. Or the end, though Wyll sways towards hope and optimism.

In the presence of darkness and solace, -Wyll finds that you remain yourself. Bright and clear and comforting, even in the face of impending doom.

Your camp in the Shadowfell lands is brightened by artificial lights. It spans over more land now. The main area which hosts all of your companions lies at the foot of an abandoned building. An abandoned house, torn by vines of shadowfell and roots. The base of camp is spread over dusty ashen floors, everything colored gray.

When it’s time to rest, most lights remain on. He finds it’s easier to sleep with Selune’s blessing.

Tonight, Wyll can't get any rest at all. He’s still awake while his companions have fallen asleep. He opens his eyes to the skies. They lack the deep shades of purple of a normal night sky, unmistakably dark.

His eyes remain lidded as he takes a look at his surroundings. Shadowheart is asleep, and Astarion is deep enough in meditation that Wyll doubts he’d noticed if he walked off. Among his companions, you’re missing from your bedroll.

Wyll sits up as quietly as he can. He looks towards your tent, to see if you’ve woken up to sleep inside - but doesn’t find you there either. His brow tightens, shoulders tense as he blinks rapidly trying to wake himself up.

There aren’t many places in this camp to go, despite the terrain being wider. The other tent occupants remain in place. From where Wyll stands you’re not with anyone else like Karlach or Halsin.

There’s only one more place that would leave you.

Through a curve and another straight path are wood stairs. At the top is a skeleton of an old house. One that stood long before the curse, and remains long after.

Wyll has never gone there on his own. He only saw it once while they’d settled in for the first time. There’s nothing inside of it. A fireplace, a broken cupboard and cabinet. A table and chair, and two old beds that have gone rickety overtime.

He ducks his head as he enters through what must’ve once been a door.

It occurs to him he’s never really seen you pray. Not fully at least. Though you utter it on occasion, the words of your goddess - you tend to speak them lightly. Wyll gathers its out of respect for Shadowheart.

He finds you on the edge of a large bed in the center of the room. You’re in your humanoid form, with only your ears and tail and teeth - your hands are clasped tightly around a necklace. The fireplace is burning, but it’s not what illuminates you.

All around you though is a pale blue glow, like the moon itself has surrounded you with all of its might. You’re quiet in incantation - the warmth of a smile lighting up your features. You’re not in your usual nightwear of a loose shirt and pants. Instead you wear the silk of a slip and something like a Selunite robe, open. Wyll has seen so much of your skin before, everything past your knees barren. But its a new feeling. Your neck and shoulders are just the same, your hand on your chest ducking from view.

You breathe deeply, before your eyes flutter open and see him at the door. You smile at him.

“You’re awake,” You say first, letting go of the necklace chain. “Hope everything’s alright?”

“Sorry. And yes, everything is fine - I had just woken up and couldn’t find you,” Wyll feels flush as he adds the rest to the conversation “And I uhm. Well I was worried something might have happened.”

“Oh, shit, I’m sorry. I figured everyone would be asleep so I didn’t bother telling anyone,” You say apologetically “Our Silver Lady called to me so I felt I ought to answer.”

You pause before laughing. “Wait, sit first. Unless you’re going back to sleep right away.”

Wyll shakes his head as your grin widens making his heart feel rather funny.

He sits next to you, fond as you bring your leg up and face him. Your back rests on the broken wood at the foot of the bed. You’ve tidied the room a bit, and these sheets don’t have as much dust as they did when you first got here.

Wyll mirrors your actions, sitting with a leg up - bent at the knee as he stares at you.

“You said your goddess called to you?”

“Ah, yes,” Your voice is uncharacteristically shy. Wyll can’t help but stare at the bare crook of your knees. “Shadowheart had mentioned it. There’s something in these lands. And well, wherever Shar goes, Selune will follow and all. Don’t really know what it means, though. Bit of mystery.”

“You’re a cleric, right?” Wyll asks, taking a brief moment to assess and remember all the little details about yourself you’ve told him.

When he thinks of it, there’s so much about you he doesn’t know. Though he feels you know everything there is to know about him. It’s not that you’re secretive, but it’s rare to get a moment alone. Harder to find a moment appropriate to air out your past.

Alone with you in this shadowy, dimly lit room - Wyll hopes time will slow. Long enough to know something more about you, at least.

“Right. I try not to crutch too much on my magic so I tend to stick to fighting,” You say with a laugh “I also had to learn physical combat and martial arts. It feels like a waste not to use.”

“I see,” Wyll says with a thoughtful hum “But you are a cleric, all the same. Quite an impressive title to bestow on someone, I’d imagine.”

“Ah, truthfully - I find it a bit difficult,” You reply sheepishly, surprising Wyll.“I’m sort of simple, all things considered. I thought I’d be my Lady’s sword or just part of her clergy, but I never imagined I’d do anything so important. Or have powers so great.”

The sound of your voice feels especially pleasant to Wyll like this, murmurs just between you with no threat of doom. Like between these broken wooden planks, is a peace impenetrable. He likes being with you.

“Before your capture, were you? Set out to do something important, I mean,”

“Importance is relative. But, it was a mission I was proud taking,” You reply thoughtfully. A confirmation of the sanctity in your character for you to make such a distinction. “I had been sent by my clergy to wander Faerun - to aid other lycanthropes and those touched by madness or ailment.

“You alone had been sent?

You nod, staring down at your hands folded in your lap.

“Aye, me alone. I’d wandered around for several years when I was sent away before the ship had captured me. I was on my way to Baldur’s Gate as part of it,”

“Where do you hail from?”

“Amn. There’s a few small Selunite enclaves there. Mama was a Silverstar, which is mostly a pretty word for a very powerful priestess. My fate was divined when I was seventeen and the rest is history.”

“Seventeen is young. What was your final destination then? Or was it more of a wandering practice.”

“After some years, I was hoping to get to Waterdeep actually. Big church for Selune over there, very beautiful.” Your voice teeters on wistful, blooming with longing and nostalgia. You peek at Wyll through your lashes. “In that way, we have a lot in common.”

“A lot in common. Do you really think so?”

“Mm, I do. Banished at seventeen, a monster inside us, some sort of tragic background. We make a fun pair.”

“I didn’t know there was a tragic story in yours. To the extent you could call it one,” Wyll says quietly. You give Wyll a look. Though he doesn’t pressure you to expand on it, you seem relaxed enough to talk about it.

You close your eyes briefly, letting them flutter open.

“It was a year into my pilgrimage, I think,” You explore, a soft sadness tender in your expression. Wyll sits up a little straighter, readying himself to receive whatever you wish to tell him. “A small village in the Dalelands. Young girl, about seven. Her village had ostracized her. By the time I arrived, she was emaciated. Clever little thing had survived on her own but barely,”

Wyll waits patiently for you to continue, not wanting to interrupt you even briefly. He softens his gaze.

“Anyway. When I go anywhere new, the basic practice is meeting locals. Depending on the circumstances, I won’t always disclose my wolven ways. Some people - they need guidance, others they need protection. In her case, she needed both,” You look far away somehow. Wyll feels empathy as much as he feels warmth. Your care for the human condition, he always finds, touches him. “She was much smarter than me, you know. Her lycanthropy was inherited like mine, but because she was so young - she had a difficult time controlling it.”

You pause to take a long, deep, steadying breath. “She was my little genius. I cared for her an awful lot. Still do. She beat me at lanceboard all the time, despite being seven and I wasn’t even letting her win you know.”

“She must’ve been even more brilliant than I could imagine.” Wyll offers. You nod.

“Despite my efforts, the relationship between her and her village wasn’t getting better. One day, I’d left her in my chambers for a while - to bring something back from a market nearby. Less than a few hours, and she’d been uhm,” Your voice starts to close. Wyll follows his instinct, squeezing your hand where it rests on your knee. It’s shaking when he reaches for it. He thinks briefly about kissing it. “She’d been killed,”

Wyll pauses, lets you collect yourself. But he wants to know as much as you’ll tell him.

“It was easy enough to figure out who’d done it. And in small villages like that, the hivemind bullshit and paranoia really gets to people,” Your voice intones on bitterness. Angry and heartbroken, you continue “Grown men raising an ax to kill a little girl. I almost lost my mind. I should’ve.”

“But you didnt…? Or did you? In a situation like that, well,” Wyll looks at you sympathetically. “Any choice you made I wouldn’t hold it against you.”

“I only punished the one who killed her. I didn’t kill him no matter how much I wanted to. I don’t think she would’ve wanted that. Not her or my goddess,” You say with a deep sigh. “I used my magic and blinded him. Made an example out of him and reprimanded the rest of those fucking idiots.”

“And after?”

You clear your throat, but smile at him. Like you’re grateful he hasn’t recoiled from it.

“After, I buried her body in the soft earth, in the place where the moon shone most brightly - and mourned. Her death was so severe I couldn’t revive or heal her, I just buried…her. I thought about doing plenty of other shit. To kill, to chase, to defend - but ultimately, it felt more…meaningful just to… bury her.”

Wyll frowns, pausing. He squeezes your hand, eyes closed. Brows furrowed as he looks down.

“I’m sorry,”

You smile at him. Noticing the hand in yours finally, you even flush - though the moment passes quickly. Wyll stares at you in quiet, wondering if his eyes alone could tell you all he’s thinking. With you, his silver tongue is absent. His mouth is weighed too heavily with feelings sincere, with words meaningful.

Wyll cannot offer you cleverness or comfort where he wishes to offer you honesty.

“That night, the Moonmaiden had called to me. Just like today. It’s hard to explain what it feels like? Like a cool hand on feverish skin. It was a revelation for me. I had suddenly felt so empty. And, after some sobbing, I’d realized something,” You say whimsically, drawing circles into the back of Wyll’s hand.

“What did you realize?” He prompts.

“Our Lady of Silver believes in the carving and following of our own path. But, what had I done but what was told of me? All my life I’d spent in the temple, in the monastery - among people of my own faith and beliefs. In the moment in which I felt so much anger, I didn’t know what to do. I was lost. I didn’t know what I was supposed to feel. Not on purpose, but that was the truth. I swore myself too soon to duty rather than the convictions of my heart—I’d lacked real purpose.”

Wyll smiles at you, brightened by the gusto in which you speak. He’s endeared by you all too easily.

“And the convictions of your heart? Have you found them?” He asks, head tilted.

“Not all of them. But you know I figured out one thing. I want to make the world a less lonely place. Her death will never not bear weight on my mind, but her tiny hand thanking me for staying with her. That was something, I’m damn sure. Maybe all of it,”

He stares at you, speaking in quiet murmurs. You’re glowing, he thinks. You must be.

“It’s a noble thing to want. At least to me.”

“I’m glad you think so. My goddess has given me these divine powers, so my duty will always be to help people. But more than that - I want to guide the sick and afraid like the Moonmaiden guides me. I want to make it less difficult for people.”

“You’re awfully wise at times like this.”

“Wise?” You laugh lightly. “I’ve never heard that for me before. More used to hearing stuff like hard-headed, pack runt, cry baby. So on and so forth. But I’ll cherish it before you change your mind.”

“Do you feel fulfilled here? Becoming a hero of a city, saving so many people - surely that too aligns with your convictions”

“Asking an awful lot about me,” You tease finally. Wyll is hard-pressed to deny it. It’s so obvious. “But I do. I’d say managing to become Astarion’s friend is a high enough accomplishment with regards to you know, my convictions and all. It’s honestly like my life’s work. He even pets me now. Willingly!”

Wyll laughs loudly at the sudden excitement in your voice. You haven’t let go of his hand, he notices.

He hopes you don’t.

“Quite an impressive feat, certainly. But I am a little hurt. Does our bond not incite a similar sense of accomplishments and vigor in you?” He teases.

You pretend to consider it.

“The Blade of Frontiers, my most important companion.” You respond, with just as much cheekiness. “Calling it an accomplishment might be too egotistical.”

“What else do you suppose you’d call it?”

“Fate, maybe,” You say, though your voice is hardly above a murmur now. “Somehow, the fact we’ve met feels more like a very lucky chance, I reckon.”

“You feel so strongly about it?” Wyll says, more than asks. Because somehow it feels too much like a dream.

“Of course. I feel strongly about you in general,” You respond, and still don’t let go of his hand. You say it like it’s the most obvious thing in the world “I feel strongly about us. And all we’ve seen, together. I feel strongly that regardless of all the darkness, the moon waits for me and that I’m very lucky to have met you.”

Wyll feels his heart jump into his throat. Hardly a confession, yet his heart pounds. The longing is ceaseless.

In all the time you’ve spent together, Wyll has had all the time in the world to witness you. In your bravery and in your cowardice. At the best of yourself, and at the worst. Wyll has seen you lie when you’d rather be honest. He’s seen you cry countlessly for the deaths of people you’ve never known. He’s seen you tear through flesh and bone. He’s seen you as a furred creature laid on your back so Halsin would rub your stomach. He’s seen you as tenderly, achingly human.

Wyll has seen so much of you. And perhaps more than that - you have seen so much of him. Parts of himself even he has no access to. A passing comment of how dashing his horns look, a pat on the shoulder when you pass a father and son. You see Wyll even when he forgets to see himself.

Between you, there is no question that he is lucky. The luckiest man on Toril.

“You know, when everything is through. Not if, but when,” Wyll says slowly and carefully. “I want to remain by your side. Wherever that road leads. I want us to be together or travel together. Though I don’t know what that would look like,”

You give him a look of surprise, then a teasing smile - titling your head to one side.

“I might go somewhere you don’t want to follow, Ravengard. I’m a wanderer at heart.”

“Impossible. I’ve already followed you here, remember?” Wyll says with a smile, eyes meeting yours “As long as we’re together, no place is too dark nor too treacherous.”

“I’ll hold you to that.”

“There’d be no greater honor.”

When Myrkul falls, the world is silent.

For a first time, in a long time - the Shadowfell lands do not whisper the regrets of the dead. Instead, the remaining shadow swallowing the world begins to finally clear. In gradual steps, life returns to the land at Moonrise.

And this is in no small part thanks to you.

Though, Wyll watches you as you insist the glory is split between your party equally. You’re all heroes, and you couldn’t have done it without them by your side. Wyll knows you mean that.

It was you who took down the foes at Moonrise towers in slow increments, that planned and slaughtered until there was nothing left of it. It was you who destroyed the Thorms one by one. You who allowed Wyll to break Mizora’s pact. You who completed the gauntlet of Shar, who saved the Nightsong with your own two hands. That helped Astarion with the letters on his back, and that prevented Gale from using his orb - because you were so certain you all could win without it.

It was your touch and kindness that gave Shadowheart grace enough to throw away her Sharran roots, to throw away her past and embrace her own convictions just like you had promised to embrace yours.

The world has not been saved. The journey to the end has only become more perilous. But in the palm of your hand is the Netherstone of the fallen general - and an entire allegiance waiting to follow you into battle. The world has not been saved, and it is only bound to get more treacherous.

But for now, you’ve accomplished something great - and Wyll is proud to be alongside you for all of the rest, as you move onto things even greater.

For now, all of you remain at camp. A two day extended break before venturing towards the city. Among your camp now is the famed harper Jaehira and more importantly - Dame Aylin, the chosen of your goddess. And the cleric Isobel, her lover, of course.

Dame Aylin’s arrival at your camp has sparked plenty of interesting conversations. Revelations of Shadowheart’s identity aside (something you’ve been helping her through), Dame Aylin is not just a fellow Selunite - but the daughter of your beloved goddess. Not only have you just saved her life, you’ve freed her from thousands of years of torment.

Wyll doesn’t think he’s ever seen you so utterly awe-struck in your adventure together, even once. You’re a hard person to shake in many ways, and you’re excitable - but nearly never truly awestruck like the way you have been for the last two days.

Wyll is listening in on the interaction from afar, only taking small peeks at you as you, Shadowheart, Dame Aylin and Isobel crowd around in your tent. Your tail is swishing so helplessly behind you Wyll can’t help but laugh.

“God. You’ve been staring like a dumb puppy for two days now,” Shadowheart teases, rubbing your head with her hand “You’re going to catch flies with your jaw like that.”

“Ah, I’m sorry,” You say, a little embarrassed. Wyll smiles to himself as he pretends to read, thankful to be in earshot “I’m sorry, I’m just… It was already nice meeting another Selunite but…I could live a thousand lives and not meet you Miss Aylin.”

“Your formality is misplaced. Aylin is just fine. We are comrades in all regards, both in our faith and in arms. I’m thankful you’ve given us a place to stay for the time being,”

“Camp welcomes all as policy. It helps to have allies and in lands like these, seems a little cruel to leave people to the wilds. Though soon that won’t be an issue,”

“You’ve accomplished something incredible,” Isobel praises. Wyll glances at you, a warmth settling in his chest at the surprise you seem to feel. “Lifting the curse from these lands, it was no small task.”

“It was all of our contribution! I’m just glad we’re a little bit closer to getting rid of these pests.” You lament with a dramatic sigh “And I’m excited to be in a place where I can feel the presence of the moon again.”

“It must be hard on you,” Isobel says sympathetically. You smile.

“I can hardly imagine,” Aylin adds, shaking her head. “There is perhaps some small blessing in the fact you’re gifted with control, but the effects that these lands must have on your body. May She ease your burden.”

Shadowheart gives you a look of confusion. “You know, you’ve mentioned this to me before - but I don’t actually know how it affects your conditions,” Her frown deepens. “A little hypocritical given how much you know about me at this point, I think.”

You look surprised then flattered. “It was never worth mentioning. My body has certain cycles that are affected by the moon. Similar to the tide. After 6 tendays, I go through something like.. a fever as a result of a full moon. Though I’ve been suppressing it with medication, my body at a certain point needs to expel it.”

“A fever?”

This catches Wyll’s attention. You’ve mentioned your condition in passing and always left the details vague (something Wyll is extra aware of given your love of being open in most everything) so this is the most he’s ever heard about it. He stops turning pages and tunes in completely.

“Sort of. The details aren’t important, really. I’ve gone through it for years, so I’m more than used to it. Especially on the road,” You explain, waving your hand. “Silver Lady bless me, I don’t think it’ll begin until we’re in the city at least. Near civilization and all.”

“Do you need anything from us?” Shadowheart probes with obv. Lately when it comes to you, she doesn’t bother feigning indifference.

“No, it’s okay. I’m used to it! I was going to mention it though soon, so I guess it’s a good thing it came up,” You lean back on your palms, legs crossed as you close your eyes. “I’ll be gone for about a tenday. I’ll leave my tent here and just pack some essentials and fuck off to the woods. Like I said, I’ve been doing it for years.”

Shadowhearts frown deepens, as does Wylls.

“That was then and this is now. You’re a rather wanted individual, will that be safe? A tenday of solo travel?”

You give Shadowheart a delighted look before tackling her with a hug. She almost topples over but manages to keep herself upright as you hug and nuzzle her. She doesn’t push you off in any case. You laugh warmly, resting your chin on her shoulder.

“You’re really worried about me? Little old me? Have you opened your heart to me after all?” You say through a giggle, earning a few laughs from Dame Aylin and Isobel. You finally pull away to look at her. “I promise I will be completely fine. My senses around that time are extremely heightened. I’m feverish but it’s very difficult to catch me off-guard enough for some kind of ambush. Worst case scenario, I shift and run away.”

Shadowheart does not seem comforted by this. Wyll feels the same, thankful she’s being so adamant about it.

“I don’t like those odds,” She says with her arms crossed. “Is there no one you can bring with you?”

When she says that, you turn to Wyll. Your eyes lock briefly. You look a little startled, but relax once you realize that it’s him. Wyll is a little startled too, embarrassed by his own staring. He can only hope you didn’t notice how obviously he was moments prior. You take a minute to consider him, your gaze raking over him. It’s a split second, barely noticeable - but afterwards you flush. It happens so quickly that Wyll wonders if he’s imagined the entire thing.

You laugh and Wyll swears it sounds nervous.

“I get a little…aggressive during that time.” You say dismissively. “It’s best to leave me to my own devices. I promise you I will be perfectly fine.”

“I don’t know how much I believe that, but I’ll try to put my faith in you. Don’t make me worry while these damn parasites are still in our heads.”

You throw your head back and laugh brilliantly.

“I’ll make it back to you in one piece,” You say, holding your pinky out. Shadowheart hooks her own into yours with a blush. “I promise on the Moonmaiden herself.”

Shadowheart sighs, resting her head on your shoulder. Your smile grows ten sizes.

“You better.”

The journey, of course, does not get any easier.

You’ve barely made it to Rivington. Barely. Not only have you had to fight off a camp of hateful githyanki and earned the ire of an alien goddess - you’ve just found out the person protecting you is a mindflayer.

After a tremendous amount of difficult information launched at the lot of you, you’ve managed to regain your bearings (some kind of miracle, Wyll thinks). You’ve made it to Rivington. Finally.

Hells. What a troublesome situation.

You’ve been in Rivington for a few days now, though you haven’t made it far. After being at the circus and a somewhat harrowing fight with a shapeshifting clown, you decide to put up for the night. Before nightfall, you announced to everyone at camp that you’d be disappearing for your supposed fever. You can feel it coming on, and by the time it starts - traveling will be difficult.

Everyone has had their own way of fussing over you. Gale has given you some scrolls of his own curation. Astarion silently handed you one of his favorite daggers and a pack of expensive arrows. Lae’zel has given you some potions, testing your reflexes with you before your disappearance. Shadowheart gives you as many healing potions as she can, and her blessing with the help of Dame Aylin. Karlach has little to offer you in terms of things, instead knocking your heads together and telling you to scream as loud as you can if anything happens - and she’ll come running no matter what happens. Halsin has dried some food for you ahead of time, ever the planning kind.

Wyll only gives you a long look of concern. Most of the conversation between you is had with eyes, a soft glance meeting a concerned one. With Wyll, you hold his hand and assure him that you’ll be fine - and to take care of them in your short absence. You hug him extra tight before you leave.Wyll is forced to let you disappear.

It’s really not like Wyll to be so invasive on another person's business. He knows he can be a busybody when it comes to helping someone but for the most part - he’ll respect a person's wishes. If someone doesn’t want intervention, it’s not Wyll’s place to force it on them. He's learned from experience that sometimes it makes the situation worse.

But shit, the worry has been eating Wyll alive. He could hardly sit still in the brief two hours you had disappeared. The rest of the party have regrouped in your absence. Gale, Astarion, Shadowheart and Lae’zel - while Karlach and Wyll planned to stay behind. Wyll had wanted to go but Astarion wouldn’t allow him. Said his pining would get in the way of everything. He’s off his game, and it’s best to wait till you return.

It’s getting closer to evening, the sun beginning to set. Wyll just can’t sit still. There’s no way a tenday is going to pass like this without Wyll effectively losing his mind.

Just as the sky begins to be painted orange, Wyll troubles Shadowheart in the middle of her meditations.

One of her eyes opens as she breaks her concentration, an amused smile showing on her face.

“That was quick,” She says first, looking up at Wyll from where she’s kneeled. “I thought you’d wait at least a day,”

“Pardon?”

Shadowheart laughs. “Oh, to chase them down I mean. I knew it was going to happen eventually, but this is a little fast even for you, Ravengard.”

Wyll doesn’t know how to feel about that.

“My apologies for being predictable,” Wyll says with a sigh. “But since you were anticipating it, I have to ask if you know anything. Where they’d be. Anything.”

“This is exactly why they didn’t tell you, you know? Not that I’m not worried about them too,” Shadowheart says with a sigh. “But they were clear. They need a tenday alone.”

Wyll looks at her. “I’ve never been like this before, either. I don’t understand it, but I haven’t been able to take my mind off it despite my efforts. Regardless of what you tell me, it seems like I’m going to follow them,”

“Oh, please,” Shadowheart says, standing up and dusting herself off as she looks at him directly “You don’t know why? Don’t you think it’s time to be a little more honest with yourself, Wyll? I mean really.”

Wyll widens his eyes, a little taken aback by it. He flushes, rubbing the back of his neck with his palm. He scrunches his brow a bit, unsure of what to say to defend himself.

“Well, I am aware of why, I suppose. But it’s,” He fumbles in the process of trying to say anything sensible. “It’s new.. I didn’t think I was this sort of person. Something along those lines. It’s not that I don’t have confidence in them, but this isn’t something they need to endure alone.”

“Not when you’re there for them, I’m guessing,”

Wyll smiles a little sheepishly. “Yes. I respect their privacy. I’ll turn back if they ask me too,”

“Oh, don’t worry, that was easy enough to figure out.” Shadowheart teases. Wyll covers his face. Is he a schoolboy, being teased about his crush like this? How ridiculous. “At least you know.”

He sighs.

“Will you at least tell me what you know?”

“I’m still thinking about it.” Shadowheart says thoughtfully. She makes an exaggerated gesture of contemplating the situation before shrugging. “Hm. You know, I’ve entered a totally new chapter of my life - so, out of the kindness of my heart I’ll tell you what I know.”

“Thank you.” Wyll says truly grateful. Shadowheart gives him what Wyll thinks of as a semi-fond smile. He hopes this means she approves of whatever is going on. You two are close as ever, so it does matter to Wyll how she feels about it.

“They were rather vague about the situation,” Shadowheart says honestly. “But they did tell me the direction they were going to travel. There’ll be marks in the trees so they can make their way back if something happens. If you can find where they started, it should be easy enough to find where they end up. That’s all I know. Good luck.”

“Thank you, Shadowheart.”

“Oh and, go pack some things of your own before you go. Just in case you end up staying.”

“Right. I’ll do that now.”

“I’ll let everyone know so leave as soon as you can.”

“It looks like I'll be owing you quite a few favors.” Wyll offers. Shadowheart smiles.

“Of course. Nothing in life is free. But go, shoo. You should go before it gets too dark.”

Wyll gives her one last look of gratitude before hurrying to prepare a pack.

Wyll barely makes it before the darkness settles in.

There’s enough moonlight to guide him through the tricky paths of the forest. Let the record show, Wyll has no idea how you’ve navigated through here. Like Shadowheart had promised him - the trees began to be marked once Wyll found your paw prints on the ground. On each tree was a the slashing of a sharp dagger.

Despite the clear path you laid out, the terrain is utterly unforgiving for the longest time. Had the signs of you not been in front of him, Wyll would’ve given up on the affair. This is saying something, because his time as the Blade of Frontiers was far from a life of luxury.

It’s difficult but the promise of Wyll’s good eye laying its gaze on you is enough to push him through to the end of the journey.

Eventually, eventually - the path clears. The trees start to become sparse and the area starts to flatten to something walkable. The dirt hardens underneath his feet and his muscles no longer drag.

Before Wyll lays eyes on you, he hears you.

There’s a campfire, and the shelter of a borrowed tent. You’ve laid out plenty of old rags and bedsheets - layers and layers of dusty fabric and old pillows giving you a cushion from where you’re curled up on a tree.

Before Wyll can see you in the faint glow of fire, the only thing his mind can pay attention to is the sound of your voice.

A pained whimper, so loud and high pitched - Wyll is shocked he didn’t hear it some distance ago. You’re practically shaking, short snarls and desperate yowls between hard pants.You sound like you’re suffering something grave. It’s nothing he’s ever heard in your time together, despite the horrific injuries you’ve endured. Even at near death, Wyll has never heard more than labored breathing and groans.

It’s pure distress, so broken it rings in his ears. His concern grows ten sizes.

He decides then that no matter what you tell him, he won’t be able to go back to camp to leave you alone.

He fights the urge with his body to run towards you, remembering the state you’re in. Prone to aggression and high-alert, Wyll forces himself to approach you slowly.

As soon as he’s within range of you, your entire body lurches forward to sit up. Your eyes open, wide and nearly feral - searching erratically. Wyll pauses, no longer in a soft crouch. He stands to full attention. When you finally look at him, your chest shakes with an exhale. You lean back against the tree behind you where you’re curled, shaking.

“Fuck,” You cover your nose first, pressing your arm against it as you curl away from him instinctively. Wyll feels a mix of guilt and worry. “Fuck, what in the Hells are you doing here? Was it Shadowheart? Even—even though I told her,”

He moves in just a step closer. “I asked her. But I intended to find you even if you didn’t tell me. I’m sorry. I couldn’t stop thinking about what might happen,”

“Shit, don’t get any closer. I-I’m already, shit,” You hold up a hand, though your entire body is fragile. Weak, even from this distance. “Don’t move. You,” Another labored breath “Go back.”

Wyll stills, but doesn’t budge. His frown deepens. “You don’t have to endure this alone,” He steps closer. “I’m here for you,”

“It’s not about—fuck,” You curl into yourself, turning your face away from him. “It’s n-not about that. Not personal. You need to get out of here, Wyll, please. Please listen to me and, and go.”

Wyll wants to ask how he could leave you in this condition, but the desperation in your voice stops him. He feels uncertain, but his body - his mind, won’t listen to him.

“Tell me what’s happening to you,” Wyll pleads. He wants to run to you. He hates seeing you in this much pain. He wants to hold you, his heart is practically pounding. “Are you in pain?”

Your expression strains, but you force your gaze towards him. Your eyes are wide. They shine with water and wetness, your tearstained expression landing on his face.

“Fuck, Wyll, you - I’m in heat. So d-don’t come any closer. Go, go—please, I’m begging.”

Heat. Wyll knows little about the cycles of werewolves. But he knows about wolves, and other animals at least. Heat. A period of heightened sexual reception during mating season. Wyll pauses, then blinks. His stomach drops, heart quickening.

Shit. Shit.

“You’re in…heat.”

“Y-yes. And it lasts for a tenday, so you need to listen to me and get out of here. Now.”

Wyll doesn’t move.

“Would,” Wyll swallows the thick feeling in his throat. “If someone else had come. Would you have,”

He hardly knows what he’s asking. But it seems you do, because you open your eyes - in utter distress and shake your head.

“No,” You shake your head and hold your breath, trying to calm yourself as you breathe. You focus on breathing only out of your mouth. “Just you.” You close your eyes again and continue to tremble. “Please. Please go, Wyll.”

He comes closer. Your voice croaks as you try to shout at him, though the words are too faint to be called that. Nonthreatening and utterly desperate.

“No, no, no—please,” Your words become a sob, and Wyll feels his heart start to crack a little. “You don’t understand. It h-hurts. If you get too close, if you—”

“What is it?” He gets close enough to be within real range of you. There’s only a few feet of distance between you. Wyll kneels so he’s not looming over you, looking over you with concern. “What’s wrong?”

You shake and shake and shake, closing your eyes - tearing your gaze away from him. Your lower lips waver, both hands covering your face as you cry.

“Your s-scent,” You heave, trying to push back against the tree. “It’ll make me want to t-touch you. And I can’t. I can’t and—I want too. So badly, you’re so close, please stay away. It’s cruel, so cruel to me,”

Wyll feels his own voice almost give out. Seeing you like this. So desperate. Needy. The guilt is outweighed by another feeling he chooses not to name.

“You can touch me,” He assures.

You sob.

“Not just touch. Wyll, please, go.”

“Hells,” He comes closer towards you and you flinch. “I’m not so clueless. I know what you meant. It’s alright.”

Your eyes flicker open in disbelief.

“You,” You look at him through teary eyes. “I-it’s important to you to... With someone you love. Not like this.”

“Gods, who else but you? I love you,” Wyll says with his own voice nearly shot. Your eyes widen in disbelief. “Of course I love you. I want to be with you for the rest of our lives.”

“Wyll,” You sob for a different reason this time. “I love you. I w-want you, I want you.”

“Tell me. Can I touch you?”

“Please,” You’re so tender like this. Wyll has never seen it in his life. It’d be unimaginable, had he not witnessed.

Strong and capable and brave and rowdy - reduced to a fragile, pleading mess.

Wyll doesn’t know how to touch you. If he were more honest with himself in the moment - more sensible, he’d admit this to you in a quiet secret. He doesn’t have room for doubt now, so Wyll is gentle when he reaches for you. He pulls your wrists from where they’re glued to you, unfurls your form slowly and looks closely at your face. He guides your hands around his neck and brings you towards him. With slow, careful maneuvering - he sits down with you.

Holding you in his embrace, he brings you into his lap - sitting where you once were. Until you’re over his own, resting your full weight against his. Your knees rest on either side of his thighs, straddling him. You look at Wyll from above, your lower lip still quivering.

“It’s alright,” He says, hands on your waist but not moving “Take what you need,”

With a wordless whimper, you grab the fabric of Wyll’s clothing, light armor that he changed into before leaving - tight enough he can feel the tension in fabric. You lean in, your eyes shut tightly and press your nose along the side of his neck. Wyll can feel you bump against this jaw. He tilts his head back to give you more access to him. His body is hot with your sudden proximity, your own skin completely feverish from need. You inhale, so deeply and so wantonly Wyll doesn’t know what else to do other than sit and let you.

The thought passes. Like a mutt. Like a puppy. You breathe Wyll in like it’s the only thing keeping you alive, grinding instinctively on his lap. Something that he overlooks for the sake of being the sane one between you.

“You,” Your voice has calmed down a fair bit, though it's just as thick as it was before. “Shit, it’s so good.”

Your grip on his clothes tighten. Wyll rubs a soothing hand on your waist, still over your clothes. You continue it, taking deep breaths of him like a life-line until your grip starts to loosen. You’re no longer shaking at least. You pull away from him with wet pleading eyes, butting your forehead with his. Wyll winces, but bites back a smile at you once he realizes you’re a tad bit more sobered up.

“What in the hells are you doing here?” You interrogate.

“Are you alright?” Wyll says, ignoring your first question. “Has it gone down?”

“It comes in waves. The first wave has passed, but the second one will hit soon enough. Five minutes if I had to guess,” You say, shaking your head. You fix your gaze on him. Wyll suddenly becomes aware of your proximity (or lack thereof). “Why are you here, Wyll?”

“Why? A better question is how could I not be here?” Wyll says carefully, examining your every expression. “An ominous sickness, traveling alone for an entire tenday when we’ve all spent our entire journey together. I’m sorry if I’ve offended you, but I couldn’t sit back quietly while I was so worried for your safety.”

“Like I told you and everyone else, I’m fine. I’ve been handling heats alone since I started puberty. It’s not a very pretty sight,” You pout shyly. Wyll finds it utterly adorable. “And well, it’s not like I can announce to everyone I’m in literal heat. Fever is easier.”

“I’m sorry if I’ve invaded your privacy. If I had known,” He clears his throat, looking away from you “If I had known it was something like this, I would’ve approached it more delicately.”

“My brain is too heat-addled to be properly embarrassed, which is lucky - because I’m definitely going to be pissed when this is over.” You say, clutching the front of his shirt again. “Everything is all out of order now.”

“Why do you say that?”

“You’re the one going on about keeping things old school, you know.”

“Well yes. But it’s not for any reason so rigid,” Wyll reaches his hand to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing underneath your eyes. “These sorts of affairs are more enchanting when the love is there. That’s the part that matters.”

“You’re not disappointed that the first time we’re touching each other is because I’m this desperate to touch you?”

“I just like being able to hold you. For any reason at all,” Wyll says honestly, then adds. “And well, if I were to be frank, seeing you in this state is… rousing. In its own right.”

You flush, and mumble. “Pervert.”

He forgives the comment just as you’ve forgiven him for his intrusion. He looks at you tenderly, heart swelling so much it’s almost overflowing.

“Will you allow me to stay by your side?”

“This goes on for a tenday. And it doesn’t get any easier. Do you really know what you’re asking? Do you have that kind of stamina?”

Wyll smiles at you. He wants to kiss you.

“Around something as enticing as you, stamina should pose no issue.” He flirts.

“Gods, Wyll - where’d you learn to talk like that?”

He smiles cheekily. “Esoteric erotica novels from my fathers chambers, mostly. Overhearing things at Sharesses Caress helped too.”

You giggle a little bit. This time you’re the one leaning into him.

“The waves will get longer and more intense. They peak around the fourth day and begin to mellow out at the start of the fifth,” You give him a look before looking away, profusely embarrassed. “Uhm. The only thing that soothes it is, well, you know. I mean I get really… I cry a lot.”

Wyll doesn’t communicate to you the fact he knows. He did just see after all, and it’s not like he particularly enjoys seeing you suffer. He’s not that sort of man, but. He likes taking care of you, in all aspects. You’ve had to take care of yourself for so long. It feels good that he’s allowed into something that you’ve kept private all this time.

It’s fair if he’s a little cocky about it, he thinks.

“You can show me everything about yourself and I won’t turn my gaze away from you. Nothing could make me look away,”

You pout again. Wyll notices you do it when you’re feeling especially embarrassed. He opts not to say anything, just smiles.

You take a deep, shaky breath. “It’s going to start again soon. Everything is fine with me, just—stay close. Close enough that I can tuck into you.”

“Something to do with my scent, I suppose? I am curious to know what.”

“Well I like you. And it’s comforting. But it turns me on, too. Especially like this.”

“And that’s why you were pushing me away earlier?”

You nod, taking a deep breath. Your voice regains that sweet, thick quality that Wyll is beginning to recognize as desire.

“Mm. I’m a lot stronger than you a-and my heads not very clear,” You shake your head as you explain this to him. “It would’ve..haah..been painful. Really.”

“So it has that kind of effect on you,” Wyll concludes. Your eyes are lidded. You’re overwhelmed. It’s an interesting position. As far as Wyll’s concerned, he probably only smells like forest right now. He looks at the way you’re shaking like a leaf, then continues “I have that kind of effect on you,”

“Yes,” You huff, leaning against him again. Your head on his shoulder, nose brushing against his skin. He’s sweating from the journey up. He can’t really wrap his mind around what it could be that you like so much about him or how he smells. “Fuck, yes - you do.”

It’s an odd position to be in. Wyll is a righteous man but the thoughts that swarm him now are anything but. There’s nothing foreign about being wanted. His time as the Blade of Frontiers has had him propositioned for such affairs more times than he can remember.

No ones ever been desperate for him, though. You’ve never been desperate about anything. You’re emotional and light-hearted and wise and kind. Not desperate. Never that.

Except right now, you’re looking up at him with your pupils blown wide and your lower lip shaking. There’s sweat dripping down the crown of your head. Your ears are perked up, your whole body tense with need. You’re practically intoxicated above him, and Wyll can’t help but feel something less than heroic about it.

“I’m hardly half the man I claim to be,” Wyll says, a little dazed. “You make me forget myself. My virtue.”

“What’s virtue to love, Ravengard?” You lean in closer to him, your noses brushing. It must be coming again, the next wave. “You’re just Wyll to me, remember? Not a paragon of decency.” Your face is close. Your lips are close. Tempting. “Touch me. Or make love to me, if you’d prefer to call it that.”

It feels like there’s no air in Wyll’s lungs. Not enough to take a breath. He cups the nape of your neck with his hand, and your skin is so hot it nearly burns. You’re feverish, and sweaty - when Wyll touches you, you react right away. He stares at you. Everything feels distant, far-away. How many times have the two of you been like this? How many times have you nearly crossed this threshold before retreating back into each other?

Wyll can think of one hundred times he’s thought of kissing you. When you’re covered in blood and gore, when you smile, when the sun through the trees makes your fur look shiny and beautiful, when Astarion pets you, when you hug Karlach for the first time. He can compile every time the urge has come over him.

It feels unreal to kiss you now, after all that.

You open your mouth slightly, a choked moan passing through your lips as Wyll presses his own to yours. Yours are soft. The first thing he notices is the shape of your teeth, the sharp edge of your fangs - protruding and clumsy. None of it matters. Nothing matters except you and this.

You’re huffy and eager when Wyll kisses you. A slow peck at first before he pulls away, delighted by the way you chase his mouth. Then again with your mouth open a little wider, panting hotly as you urge Wyll to give you a little more. Your hands are gripping his armor again, tight enough to rip the material. You’re too drunk on your own need, to notice anything about anything.

It’s something about you - something about you Wyll has known since forever. You get lost in things, in fights or in books that Gale reads. Sometimes you just give up thinking entirely and let your instinct guide you. And it makes enough sense, you’re a werewolf - part hungry animal by blood. Of course your baser instinct feels more natural.

It’s not very kind to think, but Wyll isn’t saying it to be unkind. He likes it. He likes that you think with your heart less than your head. He likes when you give into the most animal parts of you.

Wyll is not in the same place as you. His head is meant to be clear. He’s seemingly sober for this affair.

But his body betrays his mind so quickly it’s laughable.

He doesn’t really know what to do with himself. All of the blood in his body is running hot, and all of it floods south more quickly than he can control it. Before he knows what he’s doing, his hands are clasping around your waist and he’s kissing you deeper. He lets his tongue brush yours, lets his teeth sink into the plush of your lower lips. He sucks and bites and licks as you breathe each other in.

You kiss Wyll until your lips are swollen, chest heaving as you pull away from each other. There’s something juvenile about the affair, enough to make you laugh even in the state you’re in. And Wyll laughs too, stares at your expression only illuminated by moonlight.

“I love you,” Wyll repeats. You’re startled by it this time. “Gods, I love you.”

Your voice is thick. “I love you too. Touch me, please.”

“How should I touch you my love?”

“However you want. As long as you touch me.”

“However I want,” Wyll says contemplatively. He’s quick to maneuver you both to the ground when he says this. A little closer to the warmth of the fire, on the sheets and pillows you’ve set up underneath you both. You look up at him wide-eyed as your back touches the ground. “You should choose your words carefully. I may take you up on making love.”

You wrap your legs around his waist and pull him down to you.

“Do it before I lose my mind anymore,”

Wyll laughs playfully against your skin.

The act of undressing each other is unceremonious. Wyll peels the padded armor off his body, leaving him in trousers. He helps you out of your own clothes. He’s seen you naked more than once, but never for this. For him. He studies the way your muscles fall, the hair on your skin. Various scars. Everything for him to gaze on.

Your own hand reaches up to his neck, on his shoulder as your mouth falls open. “You’re so attractive. Do you know?”

He laughs. “It doesn’t hurt to hear you tell me.”

You seem eager to admire his body. Wyll doesn’t stop you. Your palms are much smoother than he’d think of them to be, as they plane over the expanse of his muscled chest. You let your fingers drift over raised scars on abdomen, over his nipples and down his abdomen. Wyll feels his cock twitch unhelpfully. You must notice the same because your eyes light up. Your hand reaches even further, even lower - cupping the hard outline of his length. He hisses through his teeth.

“You’re…” You mumble, squeezing again. “For me,”

“You’re beautiful,” Wyll says. You flush.

“Nothing you haven’t seen before,” Your voice is almost petulant.

“And I’ve longed for you since that very moment”

Your pout deepens before you brush Wyll’s hand with yours.

“You can do the same for me.”

Wyll stares at you before leaning back down to kiss you. He doesn’t linger at your mouth, chaste pecks that pave the path for Wyll to worship the rest of you. He wants to worship every inch. He lets his lips leave kisses all over your face. He kisses the scars along your skin, the corner of your mouth, your eyelids.

His tongue laves down your jaw until he’s at your neck. You breathe unsteadily as he continues down to the column of your throat. Wyll is gentle. He doesn’t bite. He steadies his hands at your waist and only kisses. Presses his face to your skin and pricks you with his want. It’s slower than you want, he can tell from how your legs are wrapped helplessly around his waist.

Your lower-half is grinding against him, against air - anything you can find. Little shameless mewls and so much squirming. Wyll knows you’re needy, and he is too - but this is your first time together.

He couldn’t do anything but savor it no matter how much you whined. Right now you are his, hidden from the moon. From the camp.

You are his and he will take you apart as he pleases.

“Please,” You whine, taking a deep breath of him again. You inhale, nudging the parts of him available to him. “Please.”

A little mercifully, he gives you a little more. He grabs your hips and positions you better over his cock. He moves his hands from your waist to squeeze the soft flesh of your breasts. He licks the salt of your skin, meeting your movements.

“I know, I know. Endure it,” He says, pressing a kiss to your sternum. “Indulge me.”

You bite back your complaint. You’re forgiving as always.

His mouth closes around your nipples, hard under his tongue. Your spine arches, but Wyll pushes you down and steadies you. His other hand squeezes the one he isn’t servicing, thumb drawing over your nipples. He gauges your breathing as he tries different motions until settling on rolling it with his thumb. The right thing to do, if your reaction is anything to go by.

He feels something against the seam of his pants when he goes between them, pleasuring you. A wetness where his cock meets your clothed sex. One that soaks underneath two layers of clothes. He looks up at you, wide-eyed.

You’re unaware of anything. Too busy in the chase of pleasure.

He wonders if it’s a result of your heat. He doesn’t know anything about them aside from the fact it happens and it makes you like this - but what it does to your body is still foreign to him. His cock is throbbing hard enough to make him light-headed. He tries to approach this with a light hand and patience.

But shit, the way you’re searching for it is too arousing. You’re seeking an orgasm so desperately, all little rutting twitches and uneven movements. The first of the tears start to form on your lower lashes. Your eyelashes are wet. Fat tears drip down your cheeks, falling down the side of your face. Wyll is less concerned than you would be if you hadn’t told him that you would cry - but gods.

“You’re a mess,” He says with an absent fondness. You whine and nod in agreement. Wyll is lucky to witness this, he realizes too late. “Is it painful?”

Your voice is scratchy from crying. “Aches. Aches so much, need more, please. Trying to be patient but it aches.”

He hums to himself, undoes the death grip your legs have on his waist before starting to kiss a path down to your navel. It’s clear you make an attempt to ask him what he’s doing, but the words cut off when you realize he’s getting closer to where you need.

You’re holding your breath, your hands curled at your sides like you don’t know what to do with them. You’ve never been so uncertain in front of him. You help slide your bottoms off - everything in one go. Your knees are bent in the air, covering where Wyll is most keen to see you. He kisses your calves.

“Nothing I haven’t seen before, remember?”

You take a deep breath and lay your feet flat on the ground, spreading your legs enough to give Wyll a perfect view. He’s always tried not to look, but now he can’t stop staring. A thick layer of hair covers your cunt. His hands shake as he pulls you forward to look closer, and your own hands go to cover your face.

“I can feel you breathe,” You whisper, and Wyll laughs. He’s still looking, examining you closely. He uses his fingers to pull you apart, awestruck by you. You’re so wet it’s dripping, pulsing helplessly without Wyll touching you at all. The sheet underneath you darkens with arousal. Your clit is throbbing with need, all fluttery. “Stop looking,”

Wyll does what any gentleman would do. He pulls away, his hands settling on your thighs - and starts to kiss all the way up from the inside of your knee. He does it on both sides, before finally kissing your clit tucked away underneath everything. Your breath hitches, stomach tensing.

“Tell me where you feel it. Let me learn you.”

“Hicc,” You nod soft and sweet. “Okay,”

Wyll smiles against you.

For as much as Wyll puts on a show, the first time he actually tastes you exceed all expectations. The loss of composure is nearly instant. His fingers dig into the plush of your thighs as he lets the weight of his tongue drag through your folds, arousal collecting on the tip. Your reaction comes just as quick.

“Fuck,” You cry out. Wyll feels your hands reach for him, a pleasant noise escaping him as you grip onto his horns. He’s never thought to touch them before. A feeling of electricity creeps up his back as your hands hold tight around the base of them.“Wyll, fuck - there,”

He gets the message quick enough, laying his tongue flat on the hardened bundle of nerves. Your clit pulses for him. You taste heady and sweet, coating his entire mouth as he continues to eat. You guide him here and there - soft whispers of lower and higher until he ends up in the place you need.

“That,” Your grip on his horns gets tighter as you grind yourself down on his tongue. Wyll feels his cock stiff against his stomach from where he lays. “Like that,”

He gives you more pressure as he licks your clit, sorting out a rhythm as he focuses his attention on one part of you. He wants to make you cum like this. You’re sensitive enough to do it. Your clit thrums as your mind goes muddy. Your body movements change as he continues to push you closer and closer to your high. He’s starting to understand what makes you tick.

Wyll is a quick learner after all, dexterous and clever.

Muscles clenching, your mouth falls open - eyes barely open as you moan. “Oh, oh, oh,”

Wyll laps you up like ambrosia. He pulls away when you start to get close, ignoring your complaints. He wants to savor it now that he knows how to get you to the edge, so he does. He buries himself deeper into you, his nose bumping against your mound with every pass he makes over your slit. Your body is unbelievably sensitive. He dips his tongue into your tight hole and you nearly lurch forward with need.

He starts a back and forth, going from licking long stripes along your slit determined not to let anything go to waste - back to focusing on where you need him most. He doesn’t mean to put you on edge so many times, no longer thinking clearly.

You beg Wyll to make you cum by the time he’s back to reality, grabbing his horns hard enough to make him look at you.

“Make me cum, please - can’t take it anymore, Wyll, please, fuck,”

He hums against your sex before refocusing his attention. One last time he takes your throbbing clit into his mouth, lets it slide against his tongue and sucks on it. This time he relents to your need, and doesn't stop for any reason. He lets it build and build and build until he hears your voice break.

Your back starts to arch, body going taut like a bowstring. Wyll hums against you, he wants to praise you but his mouth is busy.

Then the thought occurs to him. It takes a little focus to reach your mind, and this is by all means - a terrible reason to use your shared connection.

‘You’re doing so well, starlight,’ Wyll praises. Your eyes widen as you realize just how he’s doing it, a debauched and shocked moan tearing itself from your mouth ‘Beautiful. Sorry for teasing you. Can you cum for me? I want you to feel good,’

You hiccup, another loud sob as Wyll keeps steady.

“C-cumming,” You choke on the words, on your spit. “I’m—fuck!”

Wyll lets you ride your orgasm out as you cum for the first time in the night. Your body goes arching, gripping on his horns hard trying to pull him away as you push through to the other side. You’re pulsing in his mouth, tightening around nothing as you cum for him. It feels like it goes on forever, long waves and tremors until the feeling dies down.

He pulls away once you’ve finally laid back down, exhausted and out of breath. You stare at him a little blankly, an arm covering your face.

“Up here,” You say tiredly, gesturing him up. “I need to kiss you.”

Wyll laughs good naturedly as you wrap an arm around Wyll’s neck, dragging him down towards you and kissing him hard - drunk off pleasure. You kiss him in chaste pecks, hugging him. Nudging your nose along his neck, you whisper in his ear.

“Take your pants off, dammit.”

Wyll can’t help his laughter.

“I suppose it’s only fair,”

You hook your fingers into Wyll’s trousers, helping him pull them down until his cock springs free. Your eyes go lidded as soon as you see it, hands cupping the now bare skin. Wyll hisses slightly at the sudden touch, unused to the friction. You look up at him, a hand between your bodies - closing your fist around the base of his cock.

“Bumps and prongs, huh,”

Wyll flushes immediately, making you laugh.

“I hope you’re not making fun of me.”

“How could I when I’m this turned on?” You offer sincerely. He shudders at the touch. “I like it. Can I blow you?”

“I’m sorry?”

Your turn to laugh. “I’m good at it. And I want to. It’s a little sensitive for you to fuck me, anyway.”

Wyll swallows thickly. “I guess I have no reason to deny you.”

“No you don’t. Now come on and stand up,”

He gives you a hesitant look before peeling himself off of you. He stands to his feet, his pants still rolled down just past his thighs. He slides them off so the two of you are naked, and laments a little in his mind about the fact you’re doing this deep in the outdoors. You’re quick to follow Wyll, walking on your knees towards him until you’re eye-level with his cock.

He’s never gotten this far. He’s a romantic in all the ways it matters, so save for some grinding and kissing - it’s a new experience. You look like you know what you’re doing though. You kiss his hips, hands on his thighs and an expression that he finds remarkably innocent for what you’re about to do. All Wyll can do is watch, and feel increasingly fidgety about the sight in front of him.

You crane your head down and place pecks from the base of his shaft all the way to the tip. You let his cock rest against your face, taking a sharp inhale of the skin - perverse and desperate. Wyll groans, deep from his chest as you smile. You’re not unsettled by it at all, as reverent as you always are.

His body has grown especially sensitive because of Mizora’s interference. He can feel the heat in his blood starting to swell as blood rushes to his cock, making him grow bigger. The way you’re looking at him isn’t helping.

You poke your tongue out from your mouth and leave long licks along his cock - from base to tip. Like you sense he doesn’t know what to do with his hands, you guide them to hold your head. He feels a weird sense of guilt about it, but the pleasure outweighs the shame - he doesn’t force you down. Just keeps you painfully steady as you do all of the world.

Fuck, he’s sensitive. Every little wet lick and stroke is enough to make his spine prick with need. The tip of his cock leaks pre-cum. You press it against your lips as your hand wraps around his shaft in full, your tongue dipping into the slit making Wyll hiss.

“Shit,” He huffs, hands gripping tighter but not moving you “That feels good,”

You give him a little smile that makes Wyll’s stomach flip. Like you know it’s going to catch him off guard, you finally open your mouth to take the tip of his cock into your mouth. It’s lighter and more sensitive than the rest of his cock. You wrap your tongue around it with expertise and Wyll finds himself nearly bedding on the knee, legs starting to feel weak.

You use one hand to steady yourself on his thigh, the other slipping between your legs.

He can only watch on in awe, the impressive way you sink around the hot, hard length. Your tongue is soft, the cavern of your mouth wet and inviting. Wyll nearly breaks - almost fucks into your throat by bucking up. He restrains himself as you go lower and lower, eyes going increasingly wide as his cock disappears in the column of your throat. Just when he thinks you can’t get any further, you do. He can feel the tip disappear in the narrowness of your throat, awestruck as drool starts to drip from the sides of your mouth.

You make a sound, muffled as you hit the base of Wyll’s cock like it’s nothing. You sink in further, nose pressing against his navel as you glance up at him. It’s too lewd, damn near - seeing you deepthroat him with such ease. You inhale again, and Wyll flushes at the realization of what you’re doing exactly.

You pull off in one go, saliva dripping down your chin and neck as you open your mouth. Hollowing your cheeks and wrapping a free hand around whatever your mouth can’t easily reach, you start to set a pace. It’s fast and slick and messy, pre-cum mixed with saliva making your face grow sticky - taking deep breaths of Wyll’s scent and musk every time you manage to swallow it all. It’s depraved seeing you suck his cock with such obvious lust and desire, eager to swallow him and show him pleasure.

Wyll feels the pleasure. His entire body feels like it’s being wrapped in something slick and warm, little sparks of electricity traveling from his fingertips to his spine. His head feels especially light, filled with fluff and devoid of conscious consideration.

“Your mouth feels incredible,” Wyll groans, shuddering, holding your head as you let his cock bottom out in your mouth again “Hells,”

You sound pleased, a pleasant reverb going through his body as you set a pace - bobbing your head and swallowing every inch of him without flinching. The sound of your throat constricting around him and your own hands fill the surroundings. He’s glad you’re so lost in the movements because his own voice is punched out of him each time you go down. He didn’t know he was capable of making this much noise, such deep groans and heavy breaths every time you so much as move.

You pull him out completely, letting spit and saliva rub against your mouth as you tap against your face. Wyll feels a restless embarrassment at the pit of his stomach as you make eye-contact with him. He feels his cock twitch hard, something starting to come undone in his gut as he pulls you away.

“Stop,” He wheezes, and you do with a pleased laugh “Shit that’s dangerous. You’re…talented.”

You pause before breaking out into more giggles, kissing his cock one last time. Wyll covers his face with his hands.

“Is that a compliment?”

“...It’s meant to be one.”

“Glad you’re impressed,” You say with a wicked little grin - all sharp teeth and delight. “I wanted to go longer.”

“We have days together. Another time, my love.”

Your smile grows a little. You are bad for his heart in more ways than one, Wyll thinks.

“Mm. Okay. I can’t really wait much longer, anyway. Another wave is gonna hit soon and I feel antsy.”

“Get comfortable and lay down. And, I hate to ask so late - but should I be worrying…? About protection?”

You blink at him as you set up on the ground, moving around pillows for you to lay on. You shake your head. “Mm. Should be fine. Getting contraceptives should be easier since we’re closer to the city. Unless you don’t want to take that risk?”

Your expression is uncharacteristically innocent. Wyll weighs his desire against reason, a feeling of guilt washing over him at the clear winner. His cock is throbbing to the extent it’s near painful.

(He doesn’t hate the thought of giving you a child, either. Though he thinks it’s much too early to say something like that, and he’d prefer to plan something so important. Still, it isn’t the worst outcome. It’d be a precious little thing, half-werewolf and beautiful.

He brushes over the thought just as quickly as he has it, a little taken aback by his own desires. It’s like everything is being bled from him, no thought too precious to strike his mind. It’s too early to think about, no less mention.

He should marry you before that. The thought of it makes him harder.)

“As I had suspected, I’m only half the man I consider myself to be.”

“Are you reflecting on your failings?” You tease. Wyll lets out a breath of air.

“On my hypocrisy, if I were to put a name to it. I didn’t realize desire could be so debilitating.” Wyll explains, joining you where you lay. You giggle lightly as Wyll positions himself between your legs, leaning in to kiss you shortly. “Seems you’ve uncovered something I wasn’t aware of.”

“Really?”

Wyll laughs against your lips as he kisses you again. “You often do.”

He brushes it aside as he pulls back. You lock eyes with him. Wyll is mesmerized. Your features start to round out again, eyes becoming glassy with need in the same familiar way as before. Wyll knows it now. He reaches over to cup your face with his palm, smile breaking his composure as you instinctively rub your cheek against the rough skin. He lets his thumb press against your lips, indulging your desire for affection.

“Are you still all there?”

“Hf. Yes. Not for long,” You say, urging him down towards you. Once again the proximity between you disappears. This time bare skinned, chest to chest. Wyll can feel the erratic thump of your heart, the unsteady quality in your breathing. You sink back into the same heat drunk place, a slow descent. Your pupils open wide enough for him to lose his senses. “Don’t keep me waiting, please.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.”

You fall into a synchronicity this time around. Your legs spread wide, open and wanting. Wyll feels his throat start to close. His stomach flutters restlessly as he pushes his cock through your folds once, then twice - his head thrown back at the feeling of your bare skin. He reminds himself this isn’t something to get used to, but the pleasure is easy to indulge in.

It’s worsened by the fact you’re beautiful.

Wyll finds you so beautiful it’s ridiculous, even to him. The plush of your lips, the way your lashes fall along as your cheek, the shape of your eyes. All of you, bathed in moonlight and blessed by the higher powers. You’re a culmination, the very pinnacle of Wyll’s every last mad desire. If everything around him faded to nothing, Wyll would have no clue. No sense, no rational, no righteousness. With nothing but himself to offer you, he’s moonstruck. Hung up on your affection and the feeling of warmth of mutual love.

The order is all out of sorts, and everything is complicated. But Gods. Gods. You’re more beautiful than every dream he’s ever seen you in. Even the magic of his mind couldn’t form something so perfect.

“You’re really the most beautiful thing I’ve ever laid eyes on.”

Your eyes widen, blinking rapidly before breaking out into a flush. “What are you saying?”

“When I was a boy, I often imagined getting married,” Wyll says, drawing little circles along your hip. Your mouth opens, but falls shut as you feel the head of his cock push against you. You shudder as Wyll moves so slowly, with no intent of pushing in. “I had high hopes for love. The magic of fairy tale romance always spoke to me. I was fond of beautiful sights too, to boot.”

Your breath hitches. Wyll feels you start to stretch around the tip of his cock. He swears under his breath, slowing even more. You let out a soft mewl as Wyll breathes through the sensation.

“But you know,” He presses deeper, just slightly. A suggestion of a thrust. Your hand shoots out to grab Wyll’s wrist where he’s gripping you at the waist. His vision strains as he moves slowly, another terrible inch. “You’ve, haah, exceeded my every expectation. There was no need for daydreaming.”

You make a choked sound as Wyll goes even deeper. Your hands grip tight, that same drunken look returning to you. The parts of you that are still there are teary eyed, sniffling. Your cunt pulses around him, sucking him deeper. You feel good, but Wyll is more focused on you. Imprinting you into his memory, like tonight is the last time he’d ever get to see you.

“If I could go back, to any time - I think I’d go back to being seventeen,” Wyll says with a smile, dropping himself closer to you. He leans up on his arm, noses brushing tenderly as you hiccup “I would tell Wyll from then to be strong. Become a Blade that can defend for the one who will become your shield.”

You look up at him teary and frustrated. Your arms wrap around his neck as you cry, and Wyll laughs a little. Everything is so warm. He loves you.

“If you’re any kinder to me, I don’t know what’ll become of me. Ugh, my eyes sting.”

Wyll can’t help his smile. “We’ll have to see it through, then.”

“Stop being so romantic and fuck me.”

He kisses your hairline. “As you wish.”

Wyll puts his hands up under your knees, folding you underneath him as he finally bottoms out. You both moan as you feel Wyll fill you up. You kiss him in that position, all desperation - tongue and teeth. Wyll is startled but indulges, a grinding thrust making you mewl into his mouth. He swallows the noise.

“Fuck me,” You huff, your eyes bleary. “I can—can feel you in my stomach,”

Wyll groans.

You feel incredible. Wyll has to stop moving to steady his mind. He wants to last a little longer than a few seconds if he can help it. Your cunt wraps around his cock like silk. Sticky walls clinging to him like a vice, pulsing with need at the slightest movement. Wyll is connected to you in such an intimate way, it makes him feel visceral. Almost possessive. You hold on like you want to milk him for all he’s worth.

He takes another long breath, steadying himself as he pulls out and slams himself back in. You cry out in response to the first thrust, but you don’t ask him to slow down. Wyll focuses on keeping his thrusts weighted and steady, something constant enough that your focus doesn’t break. He wants to make you cum again, and he knows better what you need now. He keeps you pinned underneath the weight of him as he finds a pace to move to.

Once he finds it, Wyll fucks you without abandon. You hold onto him tight, nose nudged against his neck as you let out the tiniest whimpers he’s ever heard you make. The pleasure debases you completely, makes you all wild. Wyll likes seeing you fall apart with each movement. Every time he pistons the right spot your eyes go wide and flutter back closed as if it’s too much.

The two of you make a mess. Wyll can hear his cock pull and push the arousal out of you - each thrust wet. It’s messy enough to make your skin stick together.

“Wyll,” You say his name like it’s a prayer of your goddess. Something to save you. Some kind of sacrilege that Wyll feels no guilt for. “I love you, I love you. Fuck—fuck me,”

“You’re my whole life,” Wyll grunts. “I’ll give you everything. Everything, my love.”

“I’m close,” Your voice is hoarse as you say it. “I’m so close, just a little—”

Wyll knows what you’re asking for. His hand sneaks between your bodies, palm resting on your tummy as his thumb messy circles on your puffy clit. You choke on your words, a broken thank you among the mess as Wyll keeps fucking you. Determined to make you cum one more time, he goes and goes and goes.

Wyll can feel you cum before you can tell him. You try to announce it, but the words don’t come out. He can feel your hesitance, feeling something in you as your teeth graze his necks.

“You can bite me. I can withstand it, love”

A pained whine is followed by the sharp feeling of your teeth in Wyll’s shoulder, as your voice breaks out into a howl. When you cum, you cum hard. Harder than before like you’re trying to latch onto him, your whole body going rigid before the tension breaks. Your orgasm crashes into you. You gasp as Wyll fucks you through it. He keeps fucking you through it until he feels you’ve calmed down.

“Cum, Wyll. For me, please.”

It’s enough to drive Wyll to the very edge. His desire reaches an impressive high. His thrusts become shallow, sloppy - the wet sound of him fucking you open finally reaching his ears as he gives into his own needs. Wyll cums hard. He bottoms out as he does, thick white ropes painting your insides as the two of you lay with each other.

When Wyll finally catches his breath and starts to go soft, he pulls away to look at you. You’re frowning at him.

“Is something—”

“Being sweet to me like that in the middle of that is unfair. I’m going to hold it against you.”

Wyll pauses before breaking out into a giggle.

“I was worried for a minute.”

“I love you.” You add, a little softer time. “Thank you for coming to find me.”

“Always.” Wyll replies, hugging you to him. “I adore you, you know.”

EPILOGUE:

You return to camp together at the end of your tenday.

Wyll is covered in all sorts of marks by the time you’ve arrived, and so are you. There’s not really anything to do to hide that. Or to hide the fact he’s utterly exhausted by the whole thing. He’s drained, though he thinks he could do it again if he timed it better.

It was nice to spend an entire tenday together, though. In between having sex or Wyll meeting your needs - you ate and slept and bathed together. Despite your circumstances the entire situation was domestic - and Wyll enjoyed being with you.

You are absolutely chipper and uncaring about the situation. Wyll wishes he could be a little more like you in this case.

The first person to see you at camp is Karlach.

“Well, look who it is!” Karlach chirps, absolutely delighted. “The lovebirds are back,”

The whole camp stirs at the announcement. It’s early enough that everyone is still at camp. Wyll feels his skin prick with heat as you leave his side, prancing over to Karlach to chat with her. Back to your usual self, Wyll feels a specific fondness about having seen a new side of you and remaining so unchanged.

“Oh, you’ve returned?” Astarion says. Wyll looks up, surprised.

“Ah, uhm, yes.”

Astarion stands next to Wyll with his arms crossed.

“Have you finally done it or do I have to endure more of your incessant pining?”

Wyll chokes on his spit.

“You’re losing your touch Astarion,” Shadowheart says, shuffling into camp from behind Wyll with a towel that needs to be dried. “That one over there is chipper and this one can barely look at them. Shouldn’t that tell you all you need to know?”

“Tsk. You’re right. Congratulations are in order, I suppose. Or some celebration. At least I won’t have to see you two eye-fucking each other every day. It was getting dire..”

“I wouldn’t be so confident,” Shadowheart says. “He’s doing it right now even after they spent a tenday wrapped in each other's arms.”

Astarion sighs. “Gods. Can’t have anything these days.”

Wyll opts not to say anything, handling them with usual grace.

“Thanks for the congratulations,” Wyll says, staring at you idly. “Hope it wasn’t too difficult without us.”

“Hardly.”

Wyll smiles at that. He watches you as you talk to Karlach animatedly, smiling a little harder. He can take as much teasing as they dish out.

He could endure it ten times over, as long as he gets to be with you.

☾ a/n ; whew… we've made it to the end. i wrote this fic in a whopping 12 days. it was a crazy experience especially since i havent written anything i'd personally consider substantial since like.. idk april 2023. i also mostly write for anime so its a little nervewracking specifically writing for bg3. THAT BEING SAID. i love wyll. i started playing the game for him and he has bewitched me mind body and soul. it is rather disheartening to see how much larian dgaf about him so i guess part of me writing this is also trying to convince people to see what i see in wyll. something something that joan didion quote about writing as a form of violence bc of imposing views something something.

wyll is a really moving character to me. i like characters who are categorically so righteous it drives them to the destruction of themselves.

but the specific dichotomy of wyll - a man who has lost every ounce of agency time and time again with this tav was especially consuming. tav too is considered a monster, but they embrace and love this part of themselves. i think witnessing that, and the reframing monstrosity in wylls case is really helpful for him. tav doesnt know what losing their agency is like, but they're able to restructure wylls belief of what this new body of his is worth. that he is worthy all the same, and that he exists outside of being the blade. these sorts of things haunted me during this. but also… i just wanted to see wyll bang a desperate heat addled werewolf shorty. lol.

ANYWAYS. sorry for this MASSIVE wall of text. i just really love wyll so much and i hope this iteration of him felt in line with who he is. and if you're not a wyll fan and just a fic consume well… i hope i was able to compel you towards him a bit. in any case, thanks for reading! and please do leave a comment if you liked it! all feedback appreciated.

also i dont normally ask but if you could rb this fic if you liked it'd be appreciated </3 im trying to find wyll likers ehdjksjf

#wyll x reader #wyll ravengard x reader #bg3 x reader #wyll smut #bg3 smut #writing tag #cant wait to post this so i may be free from whatever demon possessed me while writing this.

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trendywaifus · 3 months ago

Text

TASTE OF THE MOON

01. LUTHER

lucy kushinada x gn! reader.

↳ “ even if we are worlds apart, we’re still together right now, staring up at the same sky and moon. “

cw: blood, character death, mentions of death, edgerunner spoilers, takes through ep 1-4, kinda tied with canon events, cursing, suggestive themes, reader is david’s sibling.

im gonna do a 1.5! will be adding it to the master list. first time writing a long ahh chapter like this i think. lmk how i did fr🙏🏽 i hope my characterization was good for the cyber punk lovers. prob still have mistakes I’ve glossed over tho but im fried off benadryl rn so

“ davi, you’re going out to do another errand? seriously? we just done a gig like yesterday! ”

“ yeah. i told you that i need the training. can’t sit around like this. “

the tan-skinned boy slips on the jacket your mother tragically left behind after she passed. now that he wears it everywhere as if it was the only article of clothing that he has, it feels like you’re force to see her everyday through him. it’s a cruel reminder of how fucked up night city is. having to see your mother struggle to take of you and david by herself without a father, working herself to the bone to ensure a stable future for you and him—only for her to get fatally injured during some random drive by and inevitably pass the next day because of capitalism nearly broke you. if david died along with her, you don’t know what you would’ve done. and, you weren’t even there with them during the tragic accident, you were home sick with a virus. gloria was originally supposed to pick up david early after getting a call from the academy because of an incident involving him using an unauthorized chip. you sat home alone for hours until david abruptly came home in the evening without your mother with his head hung low, and bandages all over.

you bombarded david with questions about gloria’s absence and his injuries. he was so dispirited that he barely wanted to talk. once you were able to get everything out of him, you instantly regretted asking. that night you didn’t sleep at all. you went out that night to walk aimlessly around and gained the habit of moon gazing. within the several days, everything was hell for you and david. one thing piled after another—collecting gloria’s ashes and her emt jacket, overdue rent, david finding a military grade-sandevistan she unknowingly left behind, he went from wanting to sell it to installing it in his body out of anger without even telling you. then, he got into a rematch with one of the sorry boys in the academy who happened to be the son of an arasaka board director. david ended up getting exiled and you haven’t been to the academy since the day you got sick. there’s no absolutely no reason to go there now that your mother was gone. you were on your last warning anyways for consecutively being in heated arguments with shitty classmates yourself. your only focus now is to make sure david is okay while living on the edge for survival.

“ alright, let me hop with you this time. “ you said, standing up from the couch, grabbing your black, leather jacket. david huffs, stuffing his hands into his pockets.

“ (name), you don’t gotta come with me, you know. i can do this on my own. ‘don’t have to trouble yourself, i’ll be alright— “

“ shut up gonk, i’m comin’ with. i need ‘training ’ too, you know? “ you mocked his grumpy voice, he smacks his lips and waits for you by the door, impatiently tapping his foot. that boy is really dedicated in wanting to fit in. “ i’m followin’ you, give me the detes as we walk. “

—

cop sirens eerily echo in the distance as you and david tread cautiously along streets of vistal del rey, stepping over burned-out cigs, empty chip bags, and broken bottles. deteriorating building become more outdated as you venture deeper into the infamous district. the streets are less crowded, only a few civilians occasionally walking by; it’s nearly dead. you bet that if some gonk were to shout two streets away, it would reach your ears within seconds. crumbles of minerals fall to the ground as cars speed through the highway above. the stench of strong tobacco and other addictions nearly burns your nose. you never really been to vistal del rey or parts of heywood but you are aware of the strong grip that the valentinos has over these areas. gloria hammered down on teaching her children about the dangers of ruthless gangs. one of her lines that stuck to your brain like glue was —“there are never good endings to those who live their life on the edge, miho. ”. your mother was an emt who seen many tragic endings. being the oldest, she shared to you many stories of gang members who lost their life to gang violence. you growing up in arroyo, santo domingo, a shitty, district full of degenerates and poverty made you hyperaware of your surroundings for you and david’s sake by the age of ten.

and especially now since you’re apart of an edgerunner crew, your awareness has been razor sharp.

“ fucking pilar. did that bastard really send us here for one of his useless packages? you call this trainin’ david? you were better off with me teachin’ you how to fight good with that sandevistan of yours!” you whispered harshly, crossing your arms in frustration, digging your nails into the leather texture of your jacket. the younger boy merely grunts, surveying the area for a particular clue pilar given him about the meetup spot. “ we’re in the right area, he mentioned something about some alley and a tall, purple haired guy leaning against one of the oh—found him. .straight ahead. “ david lowly relays to you with the nudge of his elbow.

a suspicious man who looks to have shaggy, purple hair, was slouched against the wall, clad in black silicone pants, a light purple fitted t-shirt and black boots. compared to the dull, washed colors this area had, he was a anomaly. from the sound of your footsteps, he turns his head towards the direction of the source. his grey eyes coat into a sheen light blue as he scans the two of you from head to toe suspiciously. once you approached the guy and stopped a few meters away from him, he spoke with a thick, hispanic accent, “ the striped jacket boy. .david, yeah? “

“ yeah, that’s me. “

he turns his head to you, brow raised as he openly admires you with interest.

he casts you a flirtatious smile and your nose crunch up with disgust. “ thought that gonk said you’d be by yourself, choom. butt, i’m fine with this. the name’s rayez, who might you be cariño? “

before you can open your mouth, david surprises you by taking a step forward, seemingly positioning himself protectively in front of you. “ that’s my sib, we’re just here to pick up a package for pilar and go on our way. “ david explains firmly, throwing the man a pointed stare. the taller, fair-skinned man tilts his head to the side, bearing an intimidating expression on his face as he sizes the shorter boy up with his statue. they stay silent for a few, prolonged moments as they glare into each other’s eyes, not one moving a muscle.

rayez willingly surrenders, throwing his hands up with a friendly smile that’s clearly condescending. “ you got it. i don’t want no beef, kiddo. you just have a fine-lookin’ sibling, that’s all. “ he gestures his head towards the alley, “ behind me into the alleyway, i got the package in the trunk. “

david tries to follow the dealer but you abruptly stop him in his tracks by the sleeve. you noticed his arm slightly shaking—was david scared? “ wait davi. i don’t trust that, how about you bring the package to us? this area is dead as hell right now, there’s not a soul in sight.”

rayez narrows his eyes at you, a glint of annoyance swimming in them. you glared at him right back and once again, he relents, throwing you a relaxed grin. “ si, si, i understanddd. you lookin’ at me like that really gettin’ me nervous, cariño. i’ll go get it~ “ then he walks into the alleyway, disappearing behind the wall. you send each other nervous looks, silently agreeing that if rayez tries something you’ll be on alert to react. after a minute or two, there wasn’t any sounds of his supposed car turning on or his trunk opening and closing. the shaggy-haired man simply came back out with a brown package in his hands.

“ here ya go. “

like that, he plops it into david’s hands. your brother thanks him and just as you were about to leave, rayez inquires suddenly,

“ before you birds dip, what’s y’all’s last names? “

“ uh. . martinez? what’s it to you? “ david answers ‘nonchalantly’, but you can still hear the uncertainty behind his words.

the older man shrugs, glancing between you and david with a lazy smile.

“ the martinez siblings, huh? i can tell you, little man is the youngest, “ he points at david, “ and you’re the oldest. “ he points at you.

you click your tongue, “ again, what’s it to you? “

the corners of rayez’s gaze softens, he shrugs again, digs in his pocket and brought out a pack of cigarettes. “ nothin’. just observation, choomba. from the way you two have each other’s back, i can tell that all y’all got is each other. i respect that a lot. if it weren’t for you, that little man would of been zero’d in that alleyway by now. “

david spats, “ tch, bullshit, as if i’d—“

“ naive, but david’s smarter than you think. “ you snarled abruptly, “ i maybe the oldest, but my lil bro here is the special one. make no mistake, he wouldn’t of been ended so easily by the likes of you, cockmuncher. “

you grab the collar of your brother’s jacket, dragging him away from the grinning man. rayez brings the cancer rod to his pierced lips. “ i wonder, “ he takes out a lighter from his back pocket, flicks it open, and sparks a flame with practiced ease. the small flame is strong and unwavering, “ of how your stories will end. . . .together in a blaze of glory or. . “ he lights up the end of his cigarette and takes a long puff.

he close the lighter and tucks it back into his pocket.

“ or alone shrouded in smoke and chaos? “ rayez finishes, taking out the cig to blow a puff of smoke into the dead air. he turns back around into the alleyway, joining a group of armed men.

—

“ gotta tell bec to shoot her stupid ass brother for me. “ you spat, stomping along the asphalt, chest tight with anger. “ first he got us going to fuckin’ vista del rel for some shady bastard who deadfucking ass wanted to fuck me and literally fuck you over, and now we have to walk and take the train over to their crib to deliver this man his golden, cyberware dildo! “

david sighs, letting you rant while he thinks about your words to the dealer. considering that he had the sandevistan implanted in him without much complications and he’s able to use it several times in a day before getting fatigued with just a nose bleed, can he really cement the idea in his head that he’s special?

“ (name)? “

“ what davi? “

while the package is tucked under his armpit, he awkwardly rubs the back of his head with his free hand. “ what you said back there, is that true? that i’m special i mean. “

all your irritation instantly melts away; you crack into a grin, draping an arm around his shoulders, and pulled him into a clumsy side hug.

“ i mean, yeah. on top of that, you’re the smartest guy that i know. i believe in you. “

david bites down on his bottom lip, a lodge almost immediately forms in his dry throat. he swears that he hears gloria in you.

night city really is a cruel reality to live in.

—

while david stands awkwardly behind you, you angrily knocked on rebecca and pilar’s apartment door a few times. it only took a half second for the door to swing open and for a barrel to kiss you right on your forehead. “ explain why the fuck you’re—oh, (name) and david! what’s up chooms? wow, (name), you looked pissed! ” rebecca whistles, drawing back her pistol as she stands at the doorway only in her black bra and underwear.

“ bec, call for your son of a bitch of a brother, please.”you requested calmly, barely holding back your raging anger while presenting her the package in your hands.

glancing down at your quivering hands, she grins with anticipation, practically hearing the anger bubbling in your voice, and whips her head around to call her brother who’s too busy doing his own shit in the back of the apartment.

“ yo bro! (name) and david got your package from maine again! come n’ get it! “

as soon as you hear pilar’s excited, crazed laughter and seeing him skipping around the corner to retrieve his package, you hurled the thing straight at his face without any regards. before he had time to react, it hits him right where you want him and he falls back against the wall.

“ aw, fuck! the fuck was that for, you crazy gonk?! “

“ fuck you, you lanky armed bastard! get your own package next time! i hope you enjoy that new golden dildo up your ass! “ you spat, sharply turning on your heel to stomp away. the sounds of rebecca’s loud laughter fills the crispy, lively air.

“ davi! make sure you get our tip from bec. i’ll be over there to take a chill pill! “ you shouted, brushing past david to go stand by the pole near the entrance of the complex. you fix the collar of your leather jacket and crossed your arms tightly against your chest. shitheads like pilar pisses you off, they’re so common amongst santo domingo and the academy. those type of people who’d get what they want from you, completely fuck you over and laugh in your face like you’re the biggest gonk in night city. your temper and patience dwindled as years passed by, developing a short temper.

“ heyo, “ lucy’s smooth voice rings though your receptor suddenly, earning a exasperated grunt from you. “ you and david gonna be free tonight to run? “

“ yo. yes lucy, sure will be. “ you replied more annoyed than you wanted to be. there’s a small pause on the other end and lucy hums before speaking up,

“ you sound upset. wrong timing? “

you glance over towards david’s direction, he’s currently still talking to rebecca for the tip. you let out a short sigh that’s meant to cool off some steam. “ yes and no. it wasn’t directed at you or anything, me and david was just doing some shitty errand. “

“ oh fun. i’ll leave you both to it then, see you later. “

she ends the call and you just slouch against the sign, looking up at the yellowish, blue sky. the sun is starting to set and the moon’s slowly becoming visible by the hour. lucy was a strange character—an enigma who holds pieces of herself behind her back. she’d give you broken shards and hide the rest away, leaving you to figure out the ones in your hands. your first impression of her was already rocky since she tried to steal your chip. thanks to david catching her in the act with his sandev, she didn’t. but, one thing led to another and you ended up witnessing two deviants stealing shit for some eddies. not wanting to be involved, you got off the train early. you really wish that you didn’t because david exhausted himself trying to impress her by using his sandevistan too much which caused lucy to call an ambulance for the stupid boy. lucy explained that during the ride to the hospital, the emt deliberately missed the turn to the location, pulled a gun on her and david while he was on the carrier, and revealed herself to be a scav who wanted his sandev.

what lucy did made your jaw slack all the way down to the ground. not only did she endanger david, but also herself by releasing the carrier from the ambulance, throwing themselves into highway traffic and hazardously maneuvered it around in reverse, avoiding speeding cars while having a absolute blast. although you were thankful of her for saving david, you couldn’t help but think of her as a nutjob—but a cool one. you met up with them at docs for david’s treatment and made sure to chew him out for overusing his sandev.

“ you two wanna come over my place? “

her sudden question made you look at her like she was crazy and david reluctantly just accepts the invitation. you can tell your brother was intrigued by her and honestly, you don’t blame him after she risked her life (and his!) to save him. not to mention, lucy was a sight for sore eyes herself—a pretty lady with a nice amount of sense (still a nutjob!) that others in night city lacked. however, you knew better than to wholly trust her when you only knew her for half a day.

upon you, david, and lucy entering inside of her home, your eyes locked onto a large, rectangular window in her apartment with a perfect view of the moon nestled in the night sky. after settling down with the netrunner, you learned about her common interest in the moon both from the poster on her wall and through chatting. just like you, she had the habit an interest in staring at the moon to fill the void in her heart, just like you, she wanted to get away from the clenched jaws of night city. but unlike you, who had your mother’s crumbling dreams floating through the skies of a shithole of a city and david to look after; lucy has no ties other than the crew she’s with. who knows how much they really mean to her. maybe if given the chance to, she’d probably run away.

your guard around her dwindled as the conversation continued. it completely dissipated when she introduced you to a brain dance of a reconstruction of the moon which strengthened your dream to travel to the moon. the moon simulation felt so real, the sun’s warmth kissing your skin, its shine nearly blinding you as if it actually could. your body was light so the first you did was jump and float around, feeling free. lucy would laugh fondly at your childlike discoveries throughout your time with her. she showed you so many things, made you feel so many emotions during that short time with her. after a fun while, you and lucy sat down to gaze at the fake earth ahead, full of joy and satisfaction.

“ i never showed anyone this before. i. .had fun. “

breaking your attention from the earth, you turned your head, and you became speechless. painted rosy lips curled into a soft, warm smile, her pastel eyes twinkled at you, holding a unreadable emotion you couldn’t decipher. all you knew was the feeling of awe and soon after, a sharp pain to your cheek, forcefully taking you out of the bd.

you grit your teeth at the remembrance of the interrogation with maine and his crew. at the time, getting pressed by a group of edgerunners and feeling utterly betrayed by a stranger you almost trusted nearly made you throw a fit. however, you held back the anger, almost like holding back the most shittiest urge to vomit while standing in public. you didn’t want to get you and david into deeper shit. the boy himself almost got his sandev ripped from his body if he didn’t impress maine with his rare, high usage of the military grade implant.

—

“ yo, (n/n), i got the tip. you nova now? “ david asks, joining your side, pulling you out of your thoughts.

pushing yourself from the metal rod, you lazily stretched your arms above your head. “ when we leave this place, yup. also, lucy called. told her that we’re gonna be free to run with her tonight. “

the boy awkwardly scratches the back of his head, his facial expression brightening from the mention of her name. you notice and simply started to walk; david follows after. “ preem. i’ve need to get some more training in. “

“ and with lucy, the girl who saved your live and almost ended ours together by snitchin’. “ you grumble, crossing your arms back over your chest. david lets out a soft sigh, tucking his hands in his jacket pockets.

“ i was starting to get over that. not really that mad like before though. “

“ when i think bout it, i can’t help but to. normally i don’t get my shit tangled up like this, but i don’t exactly like getting hung up by my ankle with a black eye after getting taken to the moon by a girlie who likes to be spontaneous on the first day. .” somewhere in the back of your mind, you don’t really blame her.

cars occasionally rode past as you and david stroll down the streets of watson. the district wasn’t much different than heywood, vistal del rey, and santo domingo. it used to be an area once full of life, bubbling with lively biz—now it’s sour with gang violence much like the corners of night city. maelstrom and tiger claws are the cause as they ruin everything they touch, greedy and terrible, just like corpo rats. they’re so territorial that they’re fighting each other over parts of the district. many tragic endings of innocents are caused by them, families separated, and young, impressionable adolescents left to make series of bad choices that’ll have them leave the earth as one of many statistics in night city.

“ yeah, maine and them came barging in while you and lucy was in the brain dance. caught me by surprise and before i knew it, maine decked me in the face. hurt like a bitch too. “ the younger sibling clicks his tongue, lazily kicking away an empty can of beer without a single thought.

“ trust me, i know. fuck, that black eye lasted for a good min, didn’t it? i swear one day i’ll get my lick back. and lucy definitely owes me an apology. double too. “ you ghost your hand over your port on the side of your neck where the netrunner discreetly implanted the tracker in. the audacity for maine to warn you and david to not run away—like, where the fuck to? david remained quiet up until you reached the metrostation with him. you paid for his ticket and yours with ease. luckily the train hasn’t arrived yet and not many people were around so you sat down on a bench while david stood beside it.

“ . .why didn’t you tell me your dream was to go to the moon? “ david spoke out, breaking the silence, his still gaze was fixated somewhere off in the distance.

you leaned back into the bench, looking up at the sky that’s now turning into a dark purple. “ because it’s a wish. a wish for the most part is just wishy washy thinking. besides, in this city, no dream can become true unless there’s a sacrifice or if you’re a corpo rat.”

“ was our ma’s dream for us to be at the top of the arasaka’s tower ‘wishy washy’ too? “ his voice quivered, you don’t know if it was out of anger or sadness. perhaps both.

letting out a long exhale, you just shrugged. was her dream wishy washy? ideally no, realistically yes. unless you dedicated half of your life to kissing corpo ass while losing yourself in the process, there is absolutely no way to even achieve such a dream as poor, santo domingo babies. but, that was gloria’s dream and even if it was a fairytale, you and david tried anyway to make your mother happy.

“ you know, if she were to say, i want my children to be the most influential peeps in night city! “ you made an attempt to copy gloria’s accent jokingly, david cracks a small smile. “ that may sound like the most ridiculous dream ever coming from our backgrounds but since we love our mother so much—we’d do our best to make it come true anyways. .no matter how impossible it may be. but to answer your question, bro. .yes and. . no if it came with a sacrifice.”

the tone of your voice goes grim, the sinking feeling in your chest heavies down on your heart. david swallows thickly, his fists tightens in his pockets, a bead of sweat rolls down the side of his face.

“ what kind? “ david replies tentatively, glancing down at you with a nervous look.

“ losing yourself. arasaka is full of rotten characters, you can’t go at the top if you’re just your authentic self, you know. “

the screeching sound of the incoming train hits your ears and you stand up, watching the transport timely arrive at the station. you stroll over to the train and stepped inside once the doors opened with david following along. “ i refuse to lose myself and be seen as those toe-lickin’ losers. you experienced the way they treated those who weren’t like them in the academy. i can’t believe we had to put up with those suckers, “ you grunted, finding a seat next to the door and plopped down. “ be good, don’t let them get to you, blah blah—. .oh mother. if it wasn’t for her, i would of been the one to get exiled first. would of loved to kicked the shit out of that one cockroach who did nothing but patronized me for the smallest shit. but, it made me feel better that you sucker punched that asshole who knocked you on your feet. i still don’t approve of you implanting that sandev behind my back and using it right after though. “

david shrugs, taking his hand out of his pocket to grasp one of the bars to hold onto as the train departs after the passengers aboard. he looks out through the window, eyes trained on the arasaka tower in the far distance. he begins to tap his right foot. “ had no choice. was out of options and couldn’t let that bastard go after he talked shit about you and our ma’s death. can you honestly blame me? you would of done the same, right? ” david’s grip on the metal bar tightens; the corner of his caramel eyes sharpens. the leftover anger slowly rises up his throat as if it was a lanky hand.

without a second thought, you instantly responded back darkly, hands clenched into a tight ball—so tight that your nails was starting to create crescents into your skin. “ i would of done much worse to him. “

you zipped up your hoodie all the way to your neck, shivering from the cold air nibbling at the areas of your exposed skin. why the hell does it feel like it’s 50 degrees tonight?

“ looks like you should of brought a bigger jacket tonight. ” lucy commented, humor hinted behind the rasp of her voice. she stands at the edge of the dock, throwing you a side glance. like the last few fridays and mondays you and david been jogging with her, she wore the same neon and pink-colored tracksuit that complimented her figure perfectly. you hate the fact that you have to rip your gaze away from her figure to respond to her properly.

“ i’m good, choomba. i’ll warm up once we start. david, you ready? “

“ yeah. “ david answers, taking his hands out of his pockets besides you.

lucy takes it upon herself to start the jog, getting a head start past you and david. you trail behind her and the younger boy does the same. usually the jogs last about twenty minutes, just a few laps that ends with you wanting a hot shower and a feeling of satisfaction after a long day of bullshit. cardio helps clear your mind.

“ you not gonna talk to her? “ david whispers to you, maintaining a moderate speed. you raise a brow, still looking ahead, more so at lucy’s back.

“ why should i? continue to talk to her like you have been for the past nights we’ve been running together, davi. “

“ think you should on this one ‘cus how else do you want her to apologize to you if you’re acting like you’re not interested in talkin’ to her? “

you snorted, “ huh. all of a sudden you’re the relationship expert, is that right? “

david clicks his tongue, “ fuck off. i’m tryin’ to help you out. the way you’re oglin’ her makes you look like a loser. “

“ fuckin’ rich comin’ from you. “ you blurted out, rolling your eyes. he let out a grunt and nudges your arm with his elbow.

“ go, you gonk. “

letting out a deep sigh, you sped up just enough to catch up to lucy, matching the same pace as her. clearing your throat, you open your mouth to awkwardly speak, “ so. . lucy, it’s been a minute since we’ve chatted it up. “

“ mhm. it has. “ she responds back blandly, not sparing you a glance. yup, her walls are definitely and rightfully up.

“ how have you been holding up since our last gig yesterday? “

“ pretty nova. can’t really say much since the gig was like any other gig i’m use to. . how about you, newbie? “

you scoffed, “ hey, it’s only been. .like four weeks! don’t call me that, geez. but i can say nova too. the gigs are something i can get used to. it’s gonna be a pain in my ass to watch over that boy behind us too.”

“ hey, i can still hear you! “ david shouts in the distance, lagging behind as his feet began to burn.

“ how about you focus on catching up, short legs!” you half-shouted and laughed, throwing a quick middle finger at him. since you’re like two inches taller than him along with having good stamina from running around in the streets of santo domingo a little longer than david, it was pretty easy to outrun him. but now that he has a sandevistan, you hate to admit that he can compete with you if he used it.

“ you should worry a little more about yourself too.” lucy suggests, barely out of breath as she counts the second lap in her head.

“ huh? “

“ you’re the same as david in terms of experience. actually, if shit were to truly go down, he would have a better chance at surviving cus’ of the sandev he has. you don’t have any implants that can give you an advantage over a punk one on one. “

you hum at her criticism, beads of sweat dripping down your chin. adrenaline rushes into your veins, pumping you with natural energy to continue your jogging. however, you’re beginning to get tired and you’re starting to become slow, yet, you don’t stop. “ that’s true lucy. m‘not even mad at that. gonna make somethin’ work in the future so i won’t be a deadweight to you and the others. wanna protect david too cus’ he’s all i have. “

the older girl stays silent for a few moments, allowing your soft huffs and puffs to take over the silence to think about her next response. the question that sat on her tongue for the past few weeks runs off and slips through her lips.

“ is that what makes you serious about edgerunning?”

“ definitely. “ you say with full confidence.

she gives you a little look from the corner of her eye and stops abruptly. you stop too and hunched over to catch your breath. you think you’re on your third lap now without stopping? you and lucy are still in the area around the shore post. david is no where to be found but you know he isn’t far away. he won’t get lost if he keeps running straight.

“ what’s wrong—“

“ here. full training regimen. for you and david. you two are on your own after today. won’t hold your hands anymore. “ lucy hands you a chip and you examine it in your palm. she continues, “ if you’re serious about this, you’re gonna need to keep up. and then. .”

you lift your confused gaze at her and she stares back with a neutral expression. what is she thinking right now? “ and then. .? “

you blink several times as she simply turns on her heel and jogs off ahead, not even attempting to finish her prep talk.

“ that’s a start. . “ you mumbled, turning your head to the direction you and lucy previously ran from and saw david finally catching up. you cast him a proud smile, waving at him as he runs up, breathless.

“ wh-where’s lucy? “

“ she went on ahead. she gave us a little parting gift, i’ll tell you what happened on our way back home. “

—

“ your punches are lacking today! what’s the problem, kid? “ dorio inquiries with concern, steadying the heavy punching bag in place before stepping over to you. running a hand through your (h/c) hair, you just sighed dejectedly. lately, you been thinking about lucy and it’s starting to become pathetic. you want to understand her. you want a answer on why she really showed you the brain dance of the moon. was it to just stall? did she truly deceive you? how much was it real? fake? was her wondrous laughter and pretty smiles genuine?

“ sorry, just been thinking, that’s all, ‘rio. “

she swings an arm around your shoulders firmly, “ well, spill it. i’m here to talk with ya. “ the encouraging smile on her face made your guard loosen.

“ i’ve. . .been thinkin’ about lucy. “

“ figured so. “

“ huh? “ you whipped your head up at the much taller and older woman with a surprised expression. she just continues to smile, this time, knowingly. “ maine had a talk with david yesterday and he told me all about what’s going on between you and lucy. i gotta say, a date to the moon? even that didn’t happen for me and maine on our first date! it was just full of cracking’ heads and thrill! “

your nose scrunched up, “ aw fuck, you and maine? ew—“ she ruffles your head roughly and bellows out a laugh.

“ ah, shut up! anyways, what’s got you thinkin’ about her? still upset that she turned you and david over to us after the date? “

you nod your head, shifting your gaze down at your feet, “ yeah. jus’ wanna know if everything was real or fake. dunno what to really do. “

“ hmm, i see. well, after the biz tomorrow, how about you try to talk to her. it’s about damn time you suckers chat it out. you’re just like your lil bro, mopin’ around n killin’ the vibe. cheer up. i bet if you stop draggin’ your feet like that and brighten up that pretty face of yours, he would too. “

you sighed, fixing up your tousled hair as the experienced merc backs off. “ i guess. but hey ‘rio, gotta question. “

“ lay it on me. “

“ how long has lucy been a edgerunner? “

a pensive look dawns on dorio’s features as she thinks, resting a finger under her chin. “ mm, maybe bout a year so? kiwi took her in and the rest was history. before all of that, i dunno much about lucy. so far, she’s been pullin’ her own weight in the crew so that’s all that matters. anyways, i gotta delta. gonna go meet with maine to discuss detes about tomorrow, see ya kid. “

dorio leaves you alone to your thoughts. you exhale through your nose and went over to the skinny, tall table to turn on the radio. using the knob, you glossed over radio channels until it was a certain channel that you usually listen to— 98.7, body heat radio. you tune the volume just enough for you to vibe. dragging your feet over to the couch, you plant your butt on the down on the cushion. you leaned back against the head and closed your eyes.

“ you are now listening to chest pain by malcom todd. “

my chest is hurting, my feet can’t fall out of bed

i don't know where to go, so I'll lay here instead

with my symptoms, symptoms of sorrow and dread

they all said it would fade but again and again

suddenly, the sound of an incoming call rings through your reception and you groan out loudly in irritation. peeling one eye open, you’re surprised to see the principal of your former academy calling you. “ the fuck is this. . “

i loveee, i loveeee

i love, i love, i love,

you accepted the call.

“ hello, good evening, (name). how are you—“

i loveee, i loveeee

“ cut the crap, what is it? should there be a reason why you’re calling me when i—no, me and david, left the academy weeks ago? “

“ a-ah, sorry for bothering you. i. .in fact reached out to your brother and he abruptly hanged up while i was trying to explain to him—“

you snorted, “ oh, is that so? i’ll do the same then. go burn in hell, we will never go back to that stuck-up academy. maybe treat your poor students better. our mom technically died ‘cus of you, shitface. “

without an ounce of guilt, you ended the call, leaving behind a bubbling sense of triumph. did that man take you for a fool? there’s no way he would call you without an ulterior motive.

phonk music blasts loud in your ears as people danced off on the dance floor, drunk and possibly high off their asses. you ran your fingers through your hair, occasionally sipping on a carbonated drink that’s been shoved into your hand by rebecca. you’re not the one to party, you’ve discovered that after being brought to afterlife for the first time a few weeks ago. the stench of the night city’s most wasted characters made your nose roll up with disgust. strangers grinding and rutting up against each other; the club life wasn’t for you.

“ wassup, cutie! whaddaya doin’ sittin’ here by yaself? ” rebecca plops down onto the booth beside you, beer in hand. her petite frame flush against your side, not caring about personal space. since it’s rebecca, you don’t really care. you grew to like her quite a bit, she’s straightforward and honest, something you don’t really see much in night city. rebecca is really fun to hang with, the type to put a smile on your face whenever you’re upset.

“ hey bec, just chillin’ here. don’t really like partyin’ all that much. “

“ aww, that’s too bad! “ she takes a long swig of her beer before she continues, “ choom, you should of seen the way your bro was dancin’! it gotta be the funniest shit i’ve ever seen! “

you break into laughter at the imagine of david trying to show off by performing horrible dance moves. you’re not good at dancing either but you knew better than to embarrass yourself. “ that dumbass. i guess we gotta let him have it since the gig went well, yeah? “

“ oh fasure’! now it got me wonderin’ about what’s your groove like! ” she nudges your arm with hers, giving you a cheeky smirk. you playfully roll your eyes, “ is this your way of asking me to dance with you, ‘bec? “

exhilarated and tipsy, she immediately responds back with, “ hell yeah! c’mon, let’s get on the dance floor! “

“ jus’ kidding, girl. i think i’ll sit here and drink until it’s time for us to go. “

“ ugh, i’ll let you slide this time, only cus i like ya! “

you chuckled, swirling the carbonated drink around, its contents swooshes around in the glass bottle. “ i’m honored, choom. “

the pout on her purple, painted lips goes unnoticed by you.

a question pops into your head and your smile falters. “ hey bec. “

“ what’s up, choom? “ she leans into you, taking note of your expression changing into a small frown.

“ what’s it like to have pilaf as your bro? “

she immediately scoffs, crossing her legs, and leans back into the couch. “ like shit. he’s the absolute fuckin’ worst. the biggest dickhead ever. “

you raise your brow, the single side of your lips curling upward at the distasteful insults towards her brother.

“ but at the end of the day, he’s my bro. all i have is him and all he has is me. but, if the day were to come for him to he gets zero’d, i want it to be by me. “

“ why? “

“ cus’ i rather for it to be me than some lowlife gonk. ”

you hum before taking the last swig of the drink and set it down on the table in front of you. “ fucked up but i get it. .yet, if i had the choice to zero david, i’d blow my brains out. don’t have the heart to do it to my own brother. . “

she pats you on the back before rubbing it through your graphic shirt. “ and that’s okay, choom, “ you look at her and you’re met with a honeyed, easy smile that’s only reserved for a selective few and meant to plug the doubts pooling from the pores of your skin as it seeps through your troubled expression. “ you’re not s’pose to anyways, don’t let this damned city tell you otherwise. my case is just special for me and my bro. “

you can’t help but smile back at rebecca with warm appreciation.

“ thank you bec. “

“ anything to see ya pretty smile, dimps! “

after chatting with rebecca, you decided to get up to go to the restroom. you dread going to the public restrooms in clubs you’ve recently been to after gigs, because you’re guaranteed to see some drunkie puking their guts out in the next stall over. god, the strong smell of vomit and vodka makes you wanna hurl too. on the way there, you pass by the bar, catching a glimpse of lucy sitting by herself. she looks distant and uninterested in the energy around her as she quietly smokes to herself. maybe it wouldn’t hurt to hold your bladder for a bit to provide her some company. before you can even step into the netrunner’s direction, pilar beats you to her out of no where. he hops onto an empty stool beside her—not considering her personal space as he swings a lanky arm around her shoulders.

your teeth digs into your fleshy bottom lip from the irritating sight of that gonk trying to flirt with her. pilar gets touchy with her at every chance he fucking gets. doesn’t he get that lucy clearly doesn’t fuck with him? she even fried him a few times for being all grabby.

“ tch, “ you force your eyes away from them and back to what’s ahead of you. the tightness of your chest might get worse if you continue to hear that fucker pilar’s obnoxious laughter and his failed attempts of trying to impress lucy.

“ what’s with that face, sweetness? “

a brunette woman who looks to be in her mid-late twenties smoothly gives you a side hug, casting you a flirtatious smile. she smells of vanilla and alcohol.

“ sorry, that’s nun of your biz. i was on my way to the restroom. “ you answered back dryly, attempting to brush her off and she holds on a little tighter in response. growing bashful under her now seductive gaze and increasingly annoyed at a stranger hugging you without your consent, you smack your lips.

“ is that so? maybe. . afterwards, “ she leans in closer to your face and you uncomfortably tilt your head away. “ we can cool that heat off your face, it doesn’t fit you~ “ she purrs.

your brows knit together in agitation, without thinking twice, you shove her off your body. she nearly stumbles into another stranger.

“ christ, you know nothing about me. don’t you tell me what fits me. “ you snarled as you brushed passed her, disregarding the offended look on her face. the audacity. “ go find some other gonk who actually wants to be blowed by some stranger in here. “

you stomped off to the back for the restroom. in the back of your mind, you knew that you mostly overreacted and let your previous frustrations out on her. but did you regret it? no.

unbeknownst to you, a pair of sharp pastel eyes observed the whole interaction.

“ woah, hey there, partner! “ a familiar southern voice calls out as you unexpectedly bump into his body after exiting the shitty restroom too quickly. you grunted, one second away from snapping on the man for the collision but you stopped once you’ve recognized him.

“ falco? watch where you going, choomba. i almost fell on my ass! “

“ likewise, kiddo! sheesh, “ he combs his fingers through his maintained hair. “ don’t think i seen ya with the crew. david is quite the trickster when he’s all loosened up. “

“ i heard from bec. i was just drinking in another booth with her. not really used to parties. davi is quite the pleaser so you’ll see that more times than not. glad he’s having fun though. “

falco chuckles huskily, “ oh, i get it. i woulda figured you’re not a people person too with that short fuse of yours. “

“ oh, fuck you. i’m not short-tempered! after what i’ve gone through, i just despise how night city serves me bullshit in a sliver plate. “ you crossed your arms, tapping your foot subconsciously. falco looks down at your foot tapping, your arms tucked tightly to your chest, and lastly, the frown on your lips.

his thick brows raises. all telltale signs with those who has short patience. though, the foot tapping habit is something he’s noticed between you and david. you both do it out of anxiety. he signs heavily, stepping aside the doorway to the restrooms and leaned against the tile wall. “ listen, (name). word of advice from a older folk like myself. i heard about what happened to you and the boy’s mother and my condolences. i don’t know much about your stories before that, but, don’t let your anger get the best of you. i tell that to rebecca because she herself is quite similar to you when it comes to short fuses. although, i can say she’s more mature since she’s been in the game for a hot minute and is familiar with the ins and outs of night city. the more you let shit get to you while walkin’ on the edge, the quicker and harder you fall. “

you stay quiet, soaking in his speech word by word. so far, you gotten a few cuts and nasty bruises from picking fights during negotiations in recent gigs because of the shady insults and sneaky looks thrown your way. things probably would of been smoother for you had you swallowed up your anger and let things play out differently. it wasn’t like you’re still in the academy and only getting written up for disobedience. this time, the consequences are colorful while running on the edge; a barrel of a gun pressed ever so lovingly against your forehead, sprawled out unconscious or dead in some landfill, or a unrecognizable face at the hands of some chrome’d up punk.

“ . . .i understand falco. i’ll try to keep that in mind.”you relented, hands dropping at your side and your body posture slowly relaxing. a long puff of air runs past your lips.

he merely grins at you, placing a palm on your shoulder and pats it proudly. “ good. ‘member, if you’re ever stuck in a pitch, don’t forget to holler. i’m gonna go inside of here. the crew is going to be leavin’ in a few, tell em’ i’ll be out after i’m done. “

you nod with a small smile and he cruises past you to enter inside the restroom.

returning back to the front, you only see david and lucy standing in front of the bar. although lucy was the first to quietly notice you walking up, david acknowledges you with a half wave.

“ yo, you catch falco? we were waiting on you and falco. he’s our ride back. the crew’s gonna delta soon, they’re outside. “

“ in the back taking a piss. give him a few. i’m gonna go tell the others before—“

“ nah, i got it first. “ david chimes, already pacing towards the only exit to alert the others. before he runs off, he sends you a sneaky grin.

“ that boy. . “ you groaned.

“ mm, that boy indeed. “ lucy rasps, crossing her arms over her chest, looking seemingly bored. you feel a little discouraged by her closed-off body language.

“ we might as well go after him. falco’s gonna be out any sec now. “

“ good idea. “

you glanced at her, a single brow curled. was that sarcasm?

walking after the chocolate-haired boy who’s most likely already alerted the others and is waiting with them by the ride, you make an attempt to spark up a conversation.

“ what are you going to be doing tonight, lucy? “ you inquired, awkwardly tucking your hands into your washed jean pockets.

“ nothing important. I’ll prob just go home and sleep early for tomorrow’s gig. “

“ yeah? “

“ mhm. “

you nearly cringe at how awkward you’re making this. it’s not helping that lucy isn’t even feeling you like that. the seasoned edgerunner side eyes you as you release a soft, frustrated sigh.

“ lucy. .after this gig tomorrow, i want to—no, sorry, can we talk? that’s if you’re comfortable. “

a short pause briefly sits in-between you and her.

“ . . sure. “ lucy says softly, cool air tinged with strong tobacco welcomes you and the aforementioned girl as you exited lizzie’s bar to join the others.

—

“ you’re not gonna tell me how was it? “ david spoke out, lounging on the couch shirtless. empty spray cans and paper with symbol designs are scattered about all over the coffee table. you stood by the window, gazing up at the moon solemnly. for the past hour he’s been designing a symbol to represent he’s an edgerunner on the back of his jacket. you’re not really creative like him and you rather not ruin your favorite leather jacket by some cheap spray paint. the leather jacket was gifted to you by gloria on your nineteenth birthday.

“ how was what? “

“ you and lucy. “

you just shrug, fighting the urge to not cringe at the flashbacks from earlier.

“ pretty nova. gonna get a chat in with her after tomorrow’s gig. hopefully we can comb things out. “

“ that’s preem! make sure to bring up the brain dance and how you feel about her too. “

you chuckled, “ oh i will, wingboy. “

“ fuck that, you mean wingman. “

“ okay, bird chest. “

“ fuck you! “

you rolled your eyes and waved him off, walking over to your room.

“ yeah whatever. good night, davi. make sure to clean up that mess after your done. don’t wanna ruin the new apartment we’ve just moved into after combining our hard earned eddies. “

the apartment wasn’t much different from the last. just a different mega building to avoid the shitty landlord gloria had to deal with and to have a proper two bed apartment. at least your current one was more understanding.

“ yeah, i know. g’night. “

—

the gig was short n’ sweet. the objective was to neutralize a shady business owner in 5th street, watson, kabuki who’s made under the table deals with maelstrom. although, you and david didn’t really kill anyone, you did happen to find the owner in the secret basement—who in fact was a raging, middle-aged japanese man you had to pistol whip the fuck out for trying to be bold while he was actively cornered by you and david.

david was quick to comm the location of the man to kiwi. within a minute, maine and dorio arrived, guns pointed on him. the man was flatlined before he can utter a string of curse words out.

“ geez, nothing beats going to a bar after a gig. “ you stretched your arms out in the air, dragging your feet across the asphalt, and walking side by side with your crew in northside, watson.

“ since when did you enjoy bars? yesterday night, it looked like you didn’t want to be there. “ kiwi mentions, skeptical about your sudden change of heart.

maine added in, “ kiwi’s right about that. your little ass wasn’t with us, i think i seen ya somewhere in a different booth tryna be all mysterious n’ shit. why ya flippin’ the switch now? “

you rubbed the back of your head sheepishly, “ i just want to loosen up for a change. y’know, be different?”

“ yeah, you sure was! “ pilar jibes with a mocking grin, “ i showed this gonk one of the most vanilla braindances that bar offered—two seconds in, they got all flustered and pussied out over a pair of tits! even your lil bro handled it better than you! “

your face heats up with embarrassment at the sounds of laughter from other crewmates. “ shut the hell up, cockface, it’s not like i see pairs of tits enough to get desensitized from it! “

“ i’m surprised. i thought you would be considering your looks. “ kiwi chuckles, “ maybe it’s the tantrums? “

“ i do not have tantrums! davi, back me up! “

david gives you a lop-sided grin and shrugs, enjoying the bonding time he’s having with his new family.

“ i can’t say you do, can’t say you don’t. “

“ fuckin’ bastard—“

“ hey, what’s that sound? “

everyone goes quiet. the consistent noise of liquid splashing against a metal container hits your ears and your head turns to the source of it. there’s a raggedy homeless man standing ontop of the red crate, pissing.

“ aye, quiet down! “ pilar demands, breaking the uncomfortable silence as he stomps his feet.

“ you pissin’ up there? “

“ ugh. “

“ ew, gross. “

“ but why though. . “ you mumbled in utter disgust.

pilar gets aggravated at the man for ignoring him and bangs his golden, bawled up fist against the crate.

thump! thump!

“ i’m talkin’ to you! why you pissin’ up there like that?!”

thump!

“ that’s enough pilar, leave him alone. “

“ buh bye, bro. “

everyone but david walks forward, leaving pilar to confront the man while the young edgerunner watches in a mix of interest and shock. you don’t realize david stopped walking until moments later, a loud bang pierces through the atmosphere.

pilar’s nagging abruptly stopped and splatters of blood lands on your jacket.

everything happened so quick, you yelling at your brother to move while sprinting for some cover with the others, maine screaming in david’s face to move while he’s frozen in one place.

“ it’s a cyberpsycho! “

the announced cyberpsycho readies his projectile launcher system at the two who’s still out in the open and fires. maine roughly kicks the stunned david out of the way just in time for the explosive to narrowly miss them.

“ that crazed bum flatline’d pilar! “ you yelled, pulling out your iron from your jacket pocket.

“ yeah, he capped him! “ dorio adds, pulling out her own weapon from behind some cover next to you.

“ i think i have some pilar on me. “ kiwi mumbles with disgust, laying low next to dorio. why did she say it so casually? wasn’t that her crew mate?

“ gimme that! “ enraged by her brother’s death, rebecca snatches dorio’s gun and wildly rushes out of safety and towards the man, and starts spraying at his direction with dual pistols.

“ cocksucker! you had no fuckin’ right! “ she screams on the top of lungs, not even aiming correctly due to her seething anger. once her pistol was out of bullets, she angrily tosses it aside, and sprints towards her brother’s killer with dorio’s.

“ fuckin’ cyberpyscho trash! “ none of her bullets was hitting during her frenzied shooting. maine snatches her petite form with him behind cover as a another projectile hurdles several inches away her previous spot. not even a moment in his grasp and she thrashes out of it and snags maine’s ak.

in another failed attempt to shoot him, she hazardously mishandles the weapon and judder backwards due the powerful recoil and her small body. the bullets only dented the metal of the crate. the cyberpyscho readies his arm again to shoot another explosive and kiwi swiftly resets rebecca’s system by maine’s command, her body drops to the floor.

another explosive goes off and you frantically peek behind cover, looking for your brother who’s nearby, hiding behind a crator. “ david! you okay?! “

“ yeah! “ he yells back, “ where’s lucy?! “

fuck, lucy! your eyes search through the temporary smoke and scattered debris ahead and you spot her hidden behind the exact barrel where the man is standing on top of. your heart stops at the discovery, the grip on your iron’s handle grows tight. why the hell did she decide that spot was okay? what did it for you was lucy attempting to fry and neutralize the cyberpsycho which failed terribly. the man burst into flames but doesn’t even react to it and instead, blindly shoots a projectile near where’s she hidden. unspeakable anger instantly running through your veins, you compromise yourself by sprinting out of cover and towards the fucker.

“ that’s enough, you mindless cockhead! “ you barked, ignoring the man getting ready again to use another projectile.

“ (name), no! stop! “ lucy pleads, helplessly watching you risk your life just to see her.

all of his shots so far were erratic which means his aim is too. it’s a gamble but you’re willing to bet your life on it. your heart is beating out of your rib cage, rushing blood into your veins, beads of sweat rolls down your brow as you push your organic legs to the best of your human ability.

the projectile goes off, flying straight towards you but you keep running, not caring about the shouting around you, telling you to move out the way from getting flatlined.

“ you little shit! move— “

like what you predicted, the projectile narrowly misses your head by an inch and you quickly close the distance between you and your target.

bursting with adrenaline, you use the momentum to kick up the barrel and fling your body onto the platform. within a single breath, you pistol whipped the man and aimed the barrel of your gun right between his eyes.

“ the more you let shit get to you while walkin’ on the edge, the quicker and harder you fall. “ falco’s word rings through your head as you pull the trigger. a single shot pierces through the chaotic atmosphere, seemingly putting the bizarre situation to an end.

the man’s blood splatters all over your face.

after watching his body fall, you rush over to the edge to check on lucy.

“ lucy—please tell me you’re alright! “

she briefly eyes the worried look on your bloodied face and give you a small, assuring smile.

“ i’m alright. “

“ preem. i’m so relieved. “ you grinned toothily, not before it falters from the sight of blood running down the side of lucy’s face as she pensively gazes at you.

you gasp, “ you’re bleedin’! “

unbeknownst to you and to lucy’s horror, the cyberpsycho’s projectile launcher is aimed straight at your head. not even a half a second later, another shot rings out. this time, by david being the one to confirm the kill through his own panic and anger. flashbacks of you and his mother flows through his head while his finger was pressed on the trigger.

that was the first time he killed someone.

“ move, kid! “

maine quickly shoves david aside and punches the cyberpsycho’s head clean off before his decapitated body falls.

“ fuck! “ rebecca blows his severed head off with her shotgun as it lands at her feet. “ he was mine to kill and you took that from me! “

she blows off the remainder of pilar’s head and spits her gum out on her brother’s killer splattered head too. the guy was a dickhead but you give him your respects because he’s rebecca’s brother. you don’t know if you should try to comfort rebecca while she’s in a furious state like that.

“ don’t touch me. .! “ lucy brushes off dorio’s hand, denying her aid after her senior verbally points out the bleeding wound.

“ you’re hurt, need a booster? “

“ dorio, take the girl to go see a ripperdoc. “ maine turns to you and david, “ you two go with them. me and kiwi gotta stay behind and explain this cluster fuck of a mess. someone’s gotta do it. we’ll just tell them what that pig did to pilar and they’ll write this off as a cyberpsycho incident. “

“ nova. . “ you mumble, tapping your foot impatiently, and crossing your arms over your chest. all you want right now is to wash your face and take a nice shower to wipe the grime off your skin.

“ both of you, ‘saw what you did back there. the freezing’ up and almost gettin’ flatlined by that dirtbag cus’ of leapin’ straight to danger like a dumbass willin’ to risk it all was a rookie mistake. high-time you kids learn to stop thinking like a rookie. “

irritated, you roll your eyes, turning your head away and david says nothing, dropping his gaze to his feet in shame.

what you did wasn’t a rookie mistake.

“ huh, who’s there? “ the doc peeks through arrays of cybernetic arms and grunts with annoyance, “ you again? y’all know i’m not a licensed physician, right?” he reminded in a grumble, frowning at the three unwanted guests standing by the doorway of his illegal clinic.

“ doesn’t matter. i didn’t come here by choice anyways. “ lucy replies dryly, stepping inside, “ i’m going in alone. “ she throws you a seemingly cold glance and the door shuts behind her.

that girl sure can act nonchalant when she wants to be. you sighed, shifting your weight onto the other foot.

“ (name). make sure you get lucy home and cleaned up. david, come with me. i’ll ride you back. “ dorio offers, gesturing for your brother to follow along with her to his car.

“ o-oh, sure. “

“ w-wait, what? sure, but what about me and lucy’s ride back? “ you asked nervously with furrowed brows. you gotta talk to her anyways but setting you up like this is criminal—especially when your face is covered with subhuman blood.

“ maine said you can take his wheels. c’mon david. “

he’s apart of this too?

“ fine, b-but gimme a towel! and you make sure to get davi home and cleaned up too! “ you asserted, watching them walk away to dorio’s car.

“ that’s fine, i’ll come back to hand a towel to you from my ride. “

“ see ya at the crib, g’luck! “ david waves at you sheepishly. you just wave back, sneaking him a help me look. he gives you a cheeky thumbs up and turns his back on you.

that boy.

—

it’s been at least fifteen minutes since she’s been in and you’ve been idle near by, wiping the blood from your face. you really need to properly wash your face. you cringe at the disgusting feeling of the blood clogging up your pores.

“ fuck, this shit sucks. “ you murmur angrily.

the ripperdoc’s entrance door unexpectedly slides open and lucy casually walks out with a cigarette between her rosy lips. her gaze immediately falls onto you who’s crouched on the side. you lift your head up and grinned happily at the sight of her.

“ you’re back, lucy! let’s delta, m’gonna take you back to your place. “

she doesn’t object and quietly nods her head.

you can call yourself a decent driver. unlike david, gloria taught you how to drive. you honed your skills by driving around to do errands for her whenever she was tired from work. she’d always insist on going on her own but eight times out of ten; you’d convince her to not push herself than she already has. hell, you even helped david hustle his xbds gigs by driving him around to clients in santo domingo. there was a few predicaments where things got a little thin thanks to david’s recklessness but you being his getaway driver made his lifespan longer. now, you and david look back at those situations and laugh.

“ so, how was the visit. did the doc treat you good? a shady lookin’ guy but he cares a bit. ” you say softly, eyes straight on the highway to westbrook.

“ mhm. he did. “

“ that’s nova. i got scared back there, you know. “

“ mm. . . “ lucy doesn’t say anything for a few moments which undoubtedly made you nervous. she just quietly looks out of the passenger’s window, either at the scenery or her reflection. you continue to drive for several minutes, patiently waiting for her response. though, each minute that passed started to get you more and more anxious.

“ . .you should really worry more about yourself. .” she speaks up, repeating similar words she said days back. you hum thoughtfully, adjusting the wheel slightly to make a turn off the highway and into japantown.

“ th-that’s fair. you told me this already. i know, but, ”you thought about the people who came into your life recently, the ones you disliked but grew fond of, the brother who you love to death, the deceased mother who’s dream you hold dear to you, and the girl next to you who you wish to get closer to. you have too many ties—you don’t have time to worry about yourself.

“ i can’t. “ you laughed bitterly, particularly at yourself, “ not when there’s those who i want to protect. “

lucy stays quiet, most likely soaking in your words without intentions of a response—a response that might expose how she really feels. she pushes back the urge of wanting to talk further and doesn’t say anything.

you don’t say anything at first either and silently turned on the radio to your favorite channel.

“ . . .this channel is my fav. i always listen to this when my mind’s clogged up. well—that or lookin’ at the moon.” you admitted, making another right to a narrow street.

heartache, she only doin' what she know

weekends, get it poppin' on the low

better days comin' for sure

“ ‘eyy. i love vibin’ to this song. it’s a classic. “ you laughed softly, nodding your head to the beat. lucy throws you a side glance, the corners of her gaze softens. she’s not used to seeing you so relaxed like this. she won’t lie and say that you your best like this—smiling prettily and into your own element. her heart feels soft embers in her chest.

“ it goes in, out, do it real slow. . — “

“ right here. “

you quickly stopped in front of her apartment, mostly out of surprise because you almost missed her street.

“ a-ah, sorry. “

“ you’re good. nice voice by the way. “ she compliments, getting out of the vehicle and you follow suit.

“ yeah, right. ‘m no singer. “ you deny, trailing behind her into mega building h8. she begins to walk up the stairs to her floor.

“ can be if you tried. “

“ whatev. “ you’d mutter, tucking your hands into your leather jacket. fuck, you still not done talking to her and she already reached her unit, stepping towards the door of her apartment. you bite into the inner flesh of your cheek.

“ g’night. “ she says, putting in the code and entered inside of her apartment.

“ h-hey, lucy, wait! we st-still gotta talk s’more! “ you stammered, feeling embarrassed about waiting until the last second to stop her.

a moment later, she steps right back out, looking over at you blankly. you swallow thickly.

“ this way. “

she leads you to the roof, on a small platform where you and her have the perfect view of the large moon above. you sat down with her, crossing your legs.

“ this spot. .you come here often? “

“ yeah, to clear my mind. “

“ i see. “ you look up at the moon, a sense of longing washes over you.

“ that bd of the moon we did. .it was like a breath of fresh air. i liked it. “ you smiled awkwardly.

“ actually, i have something i want to talk about too. remember that night we met? what i said back then? i know how it must look but i wasn’t lying. it was true. that was the first time i’ve ever told and shared anybody that. “

“ yeah, i should of figured from the way you looked so happy then. there’s no way you can act out such a killer smile. “

“ what if i’m acting now? “ even though you can’t exactly see her pretty face, you can hear the smile in her smooth voice.

“ oh, c’mon. “ you chuckled, leaning forward with a confident smile, “ i doubt it now. “

“ why not? “

“ you didn’t even look at me as you asked that. “

“ crazy. “

you prop an elbow on your knee and placed your chin on your palm. “ still wish you could of told me sooner though. “

“ couldn’t. “

“ why? “

there’s a melancholic tone to her voice as she replies, “ you were so mad at me then. “

“ yes, miss m’am. i was. “

“ see what i mean? “

“ but rightfully so. the pretty girl that revealed her biggest wish and treasure to me the first night i met her ends up fuckin’ me over—yeah i’d be all pissy for a while. though, i don’t hate you for that, just couldn’t. but, if i was hot hot about it, well, i wouldn’t have risked my life for you back there with that mad man.” you half-lied. even if you were that upset, you’d never let lucy get flatline’d like that.

the rainbow-haired girl scoffs, seeing right through your whimsy lie. “ liar. “

“ am not. “

“ is too. “

“ how? “

“ because you’re the type to jump into the fire to save someone, even if you know you’re going to get burned. that’s just who you are. “

your brows raise, “ and? would that make me a bad merc? “

“ didn’t say that. you’d make a good edgerunner, actually. you already are i think. “

you frown, “ so what’s the issue—“

“ you don’t make your name for yourself as a cyberpunk by how you live; but by how you die. “ lucy stands up abruptly as she continues, “ that’s not the life or end that you deserve, (name). “

you sprung up, shaking your head at her words, “ what do i deserve then? how am i different from you? “

“ a good life. me? i got nowhere else to go. this it it.”bullshit.

“ i don’t either—we all don’t! do you know what city we’re livin’ in right now? we’re more similar than you think, lucy! “ you argued back. she’s not even facing towards your direction, almost like she’s avoiding seeing your face. violet highlights compliments her form, produced by the city glows.

“ no, you and i are worlds apart—“

“ what? then tell me—in what way? lucy, please look at me! “

the netrunner bites her bottom lip in distress, gripping the back of her hair; right where she keeps a certain area hidden.

“ fuck, let’s go to the moon together, lucy! “ you declared, “ gonna make our wish–no your dream come true. m’gonna you there, that i promise! “

lucy paces over to you, cradles your cheeks with her palms, and brings you into a hasty kiss. she stuns you in pace. your eyes widen like saucers, body weightless, almost as if you were floating in space. in the distance, a rocket launches off into the air, racing into the sky just as fast as your heart racing onto your sleeve.

“ i don’t want you to die on me. . “ she whispers gently, retracting away to peer deeply into your widened eyes. there’s a passionate glint in her pastel hues in contrast to the still expression on her highlighted countenance. there has to be something more behind those blends of colors; a woeful past that has her expressing her fear like this. she adds pressure to her tender palms, pulling you back into reality from the weight of her touch.

without saying a word, you clumsily slot your lips between lucy’s, briefly and experimentally running your tongue through the parting opening of her mouth, and pulled away. previously surprised by your kiss, the older girl recovers and kisses you again with tongue. tobacco and a sweet twinge of carbonated soda explodes on your tastebuds. albeit clumsy, the strings kisses you shared between her were ardent and solidified a resolve within the pit of your heart.

“ i won’t die. “ you promised breathlessly against her soft lips, holding lucy close by the hips. “ now, i need something from you. two things i been wantin’ for the longest. “

“ say it then. . “ she whispers, traveling her hand down the lower half of your face. her thumb runs along the fleshy surface of your slightly swollen lips.

“ wanna apology for back then. haven’t heard you say sorry yet. “

“ you serious? “ she half chuckles, you rest your forehead against hers. you’re lucky to be the same height as lucy and not as david in this moment.

“ dead, prettiness. “ you tuck strands of hair behind her ear.

“ prettiness? you’re the one to talk. “

“ can it and gimme my apology. “

“ hmm. m’sorry. “ she drawls, returning to slide her hand down to the side of your neck sensually, pale knuckles brushing against your collar. even though you want more than a one word apology, you let it go, bewitched by her charms.

“ i’ll take it. next thing, be my girl. “

she breaks into a pretty smile, a small flush spread on her milky cheeks.

“ you’re really going all out, huh? “

“ you kissed me first. “

“ touché. ‘kay, sure. “

it’s your turn to grin happily, squeezing at her hips. “ now i feel fuckin’ preem. let’s get you inside now. “

you followed lucy off the roof and back to her door side by side. the warmth in your chest dampens once you fully realized that you won’t see her until tomorrow.

“ what’s with the puppy eyes? “ lucy queries, casting you a quick side glance before she punches the entrance code to her apartment. your heart gets caught in your throat and you stammer, “ n-nothing! m-my mind was elsewhere, lu’. “

she doesn’t react to her new nickname and positions her body towards you. despite the neutral expression she’s wearing, you can recognize the fondness in her eyes.

“ i’ll see you tomorrow, ‘kay? “ lucy lean forward and plants a short kiss on your lips. you bob your head, waving your hand meekly as she enters inside of her apartment. the netrunner spares you one last look over her shoulder before shutting the door behind her.

you let out the biggest sigh of relief in your life.

—

“ took you long enough. “ david greets you, sitting down on the couch, free of his jacket. it appears like he got rid of the bum’s blood stains from his face. walking inside, you kick off your shoes, and ambulating your way over to the living room with him.

“ my fault, probably should of taken the highway back. “ you sat down on the cushion beside him and leaned against his frame in a relaxed manner. david lets you without a protest.

“ not what i meant. looks like you n’ lucy made up. “

“ fuck off, what gave it away? “

“ you seriously askin’ me that? it’s all over your face, asshole. you were smilin’ like a loser when you came through the door. “

“ whatev. “

you rub the back of your neck and craned it side to side, attempting to ease the stiffness.

“ did you tell her what i suggested? “ he asked hopefully, fiddling around with his fingers. you hum back with confirmation, dropping your hand down on your lap to observe the small bruises from the stand off a few hours ago on your palm. they don’t really hurt and it’s already fading.

“ mhm, wingboy. i was going to do that anyways. “

david simply grunted, averting his gaze somewhere off into the room.

“ what she say? “

“ that everything she said back then was true and genuine. then something about me and her being different—that we’re worlds apart. “

“ huh? how so? “

“ dunno, looked like she didn’t wanna tell me. “

“ you think she’s hidin’ something? “

“ most likely. i promised lucy that i’ll take her to the moon, to make a dream come true though. “ you don’t tell him about the kiss(es).

david’s face crunch up with confusion as he recalls, “ didn’t you call that a wish and how it’s wishy washy? “

“ didn’t you call that poster she had on her wall a joke? “ you remarked, ruffling up his puffy mohawk. you always thought the mohawk looked goofy when he started rocking it years ago. david thought he looked so cool with a mohawk. he showed it to you one day after gloria took him to the barber with his chest all puffed out, looking ‘tough’. you never laughed so hard that day. now? the style definitely grew on you. the younger teen swats your hand away, huffing, “ you know i ain’t mean it like that. don’t spin this on me, asshole. answer the question! “

“ i did call it wishy washy. i guess it’s different with her. ‘spewed it at the heat of the moment but it came from my heart. i still intent to make her dream come true. i. .also got her to apologize too and we’re a thing. “

“ oh, that’s. . preem! totally didn’t expect that one comin’. i guess i should be promoted to wingman now, huh? “ he laughs and you laugh with him.

“ i guess i should for you helping out these past days, davi. “

silence momentarily fills the relaxed ambience of your shared apartment, you thought about the bd experience with her, the kiss, the way she looked in the eyes on that roof. your gaze softens and so did your tone as you asked your brother,

“ if you were in my shoes, would you have promised her that too? would you have done the same? “

david stays quiet for a moment before he replies meekly,

“ yeah. .i think i would have done the same for her too. “

you don’t miss the longing in his voice. guilt immediately washes over you.

david, you really are my wingman, aren’t you?

“ (name)? “

“ yea, davi? “ you respond, removing your iron from your belt and stood upright to take off your bloodstained jacket that you desperately need to clean.

“ . .didn’t you say dreams can’t come true without a sacrifice. .right? “

#cyberpunk edgerunners x reader #cyberpunk 2077 x reader #lucy kushinada x reader #lucy x reader #cyberpunk edgerunners #cyberpunk 2077

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