#anyways. guess who this is about :D
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(consumed with lust voice) omg what a fucking weirdo
#guys i swear im normal#anyways. guess who this is about :D#no points if you guess correctly because it's fucking easy#pip squeaks#bat out of hell
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For his birthday Color took Killer to see Cats the musical and he definitely wasn't extremely moved by Memory

#UTDR#UTMV#Killer Sans#Color Sans#''it was ok I guess'' <- guy who bawled during the big song#(For those who haven't seen it Memory is about one cat wanting to belong to a group more than anything else#and I feel like it would strike a chord with Killer. just a little)#Also I just realised I forgot to colour his eye goop FUCK#Anyway happy birthday Killer!! :D#One of my special little guys <3#The others had little presents and stuff for him too but Color called dibs on him for the day
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Happy [depending on your timezone belated-] 2nd birthday CCCC!!
I gotta eep now, but I might add some more thoughts tomorrow ^^
For now, thank you CCCC for being my intro to Chonny Jash, and thank you cj for all the awesome community and inspiration and joy you’ve brought me and so many other people. Your music and characters will always hold a special place in my Heart [haha] <33
#chonny jash#cj mind#cj heart#cj soul#cj whole#cj harmonia#chonny’s charming chaos compendium#cccc#what who me? hide Pink Whole propaganda in my cccc anniversary artwork?? never ……#listened to the album in its entirety in order for the first time while making it and oooohhh the Thoughts about it#it was a great experience I feel bad I didn’t do it sooner lmao#anyways yayayayy !! happy birthday cccc <3333#there’s some fun details I added but I’ll probably just elaborate tmrw :]#appalling mustelid tornado#edit: adding some extra little details/thoughts because I’m rested now yay :D#I was careful to make sure to include 2 qualities from each of hms !#heart: blindfold and wings mind: crown and mechanical hands soul: mask and trident :)))#i guess this could count as a Whole/Harmonia design ??? I would call this Harmonia and Not Whole . very much just HMS combined into#one Being but like . not the thing that sings banana man and haiku and hidden in the sand n stuff yknow?#I originally had the colors more organized like . the hands and crown/head area were blue and the masked half of the face was red n stuff#but it didn’t look as good so it’s all just super liquified and blurred together now lol#Im actually pretty fond of how this turned out ^^#all of hms’s colors are included in the background with Soul being the spotlight Mind being the bottom gradient and Heart being the overall#background color#I would give some fancy symbolic explanation for this but I won’t lie . there isn’t any lol it’s just what I thought would work well :’))#if you can find meaning in it that’s great though !!!#I realized earlier today [day after I posted this] I forgot to add line weight to the trident which makes me kinda sad but WE BALL !!!#I would’ve added more symbolism in the patterns but I was super tired and had a headache when I did them 😭#oh and the trident !! it’s totally split up for epic symbolic reasons about the ending of the violence and the relationship between hms#and not because I fucked up the post real bad and couldn’t make it work properly with the trident intact dw about it trust chat
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Just realized the only "humans" during the sahara v concorp thing was scar and grian, the only non restoners of the 5 4 so how did it look/work back then?
Going back and re-writing hermitcraft history isn't something I've done a whole lot of for this au, but it's definitely really interesting to think about!
I also made this a season 8 au because that's when I started watching Hermitcraft, so it's the season I'm most knowledgeable about--this also means that I'm really not very deeply knowledgeable at all regarding previous seasons, other than their primary plots and themes/important figures. So in short, I don't have a great answer for that (and i get this question a lot about various things, so i figured i'd go ahead and respond to one hehe) But!! It's definitely one of those things that would be fun to sit down and puzzle out one day :] It's kinda how rel and I started puzzling out and re-writing 3rd life for this au afterall :D
Knowing that the server member count was basically halved for a lot of hermitcraft history really makes it feel like it's been a lot smaller of a family/community, which is honestly very interesting (and you'll have to pardon my xisuma brainrot, but thinking about it this way also makes me realize that going from a server with 10-12 ish members to a suddenly whopping 25 ish could have definitely added to Xisuma's stresses coming out of s8 and going into s9)!
#dbhc#dbhc ask#ask#goldmusicn3rd#love thinking about this stuff though#dbhc xisuma#some of those earlier dramatic storylines in s6 and s7 would be soooo dramatically different#gosh... 10 member hermitcraft server. truly crazy#really interesting questions though :D When i'm not so brainrotted with current projects i'd love to like#start watching s6 and s7 and talking with some folks who are more familiar with those seasons! and figuring out some history#THOUGH. i should be honest with myself#UNLESS it becomes relevant to au happenings from s8 forward i guess there IS probably a pretty slim chance i'd get to doing smthn like tha#bc the au's focused on the androids and stuff and unless the history comes up for a reason (and it very well might!!)... dunno!#i dont think there's a reason to figure out this whole other set of circumstances#kind seems like a whole other project hehe#anyway!!#good questions good questions
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watching loa/ouaw after watching many many shorts is like playing with puzzle pieces you're not supposed to have yet
#anyway guess who just realized that whatever test tube (?) things torbek has are NOT described in his initial 3 ep appearance.#guys i have a bad feeling about whatever happens when he gets arrested :D#this is so /pos btw i am obsessed with this#do i tag this#sure#ouaw#once upon a witchlight#legends of avantris#I JUST ASSUMED! THAT THEY WERE THERE! BECAUSE I KNEW WHAT HE LOOKED LIKE!!!!!!#AND THEYRE N O T#BUDDY WHAT HAPPENS BEFORE YOU COME BACK!!
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"Apologies! How very discourteous of me."
The words trip over themselves and he scrambles back a step, face heated. She gawks a moment, and then - laughter. For a split second it nearly mortifies him, but then that feeling passes and it is a balm - a comfort.
How long has it been since he last heard her laugh?
"You've been playing it so cool this whole time, it's good to see you're still the same Alphi in there." She says it teasingly light-hearted, but he notes the relief in her tone.
A relief he shares.
Somehow her words are more comforting than he could have imagined. Even if it comes at the cost of his embarrassment, he is still... him.
#mine#dt spoilers#au: the lightning strike#ahru hiraeth#kyanite daguerre#ship: the warrior and her light#beaming these images into existence from my brain#too many cool kyanites need to embarrass him#i am not immune to cliches#anyway i'm circling around thoughts of being the same and also a stranger and meeting in the middle#and the people who love him learning about him#and the hefty guilt of knowing he had to endure and survive on his own - things they weren't there for#but also the moments of levity where it's like ah yes#it's still you#despite everything it's still you hahahaa :'D#and it being a consolation to HIM because oh thank the gods he wasn't entirely sure himself at times#and that's huge for ahru because uh#that's her whole... thing#he's the prince and she's his knight#he's the cause and she's his weapon#the idea she couldn't do anything is Awful#and then throw into this the fuckery of s9 and souls in general and not knowing if there's more than what's being said#ahahahah#ok i gotta stop#oops meant to pop this back in my drafts for now but guess its posted now i'm not retyping those tags
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The lore i dropped is not final i may change it, twist it, do anything with it, help its 2 am and i may would have been smarter to wait a little before posting it X)
I oftenly think my work is shit when its late
#:d#bird au#hahahahah#silly me silly me#dont hate me guys its just my first time making an au#i want it to be great#really really great#but im not the type of person who is good with lore#im good with drawings#im good with concept arts i guess#i am NOT good with stories and plot twists.....#✌️anyway#fake it till you make it#now i will sleep and try to think positive about my work lol
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#tribunal#vivec#almalexia#sotha sil#morrowind#tesblr#tes#elder scrolls#the elder scrolls#personally I relate to sotha sil#though the others are each somewhat relatable in their own ways#anyway guess who's playing Morrowind again :D#I would add further commentary to each but unfortunately poll options are very size limited#was going to add a comment about Vivec#'don't tell him any stories you don't want published in a 1000 page novel'#and almalexia: 'remember kids: murder is sexy and cool!'#and sotha sil: 'has been reported missing by most local authorities'
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"It's normal for siblings to fight" Okay well it's not normal to be extremely classist and look down on your sister for being non-conforming. Or to go to the woman who ordered the death of your pet to tell her about your father's plans, when he specifically warned you against doing so, because you want to marry the boy you saw attack your sister and her friend (contributing partially to said father's death and your sister being unable to escape on the ship he chartered). Or to think of your sibling as unsatisfactory in comparison to another when you believe her to be dead. I notice that none of the "Sansa and Arya are going to reunite and instantly have no issues" crowd ever acknowledge any of this, which makes it seem like they don't actually believe what they say about their relationship being normal and easily reconciled. People wanting them to have no issues simply because they're siblings is another example of how fandom likes to flatten complex characters and relationships. They get reduced to being bickering siblings when their conflict runs deeper than that. If the author is telling you that they have "deep issues" to work out [X], I don't understand being so adamant about ignoring said issues. I also get the sense it's about ignoring the capacity for a certain character to be flawed, but that isn't going to change the fact that her "slip of the tongue" is very likely to be revealed and a source of further conflict 🤷🏾♀️
#arya stark#sansa stark#house stark#asoiaf#also if it's so normal for siblings to fight then why are you guys losing your minds over us theorizing they won't get along??#the amount of condescending /that's just how siblings act/ takes I see 🙄#sorry I guess? that we read the book and don't just delete parts of the story because we find it convenient?#it's not even like takes about them being enemies is widespread the most I see is that they aren't instantly bffs when they reunite 😭#some people theorize they'll never be close but guess what? that's a completely fair and valid assumption based on their relationship!#personally I think they'll have a sweet reunion before the issues they have inevitably surface again because while they've been through#a lot they haven't fundamentally changed as people or the values they hold#and I think that's going to be very interesting to read about!#I can't figure out why people always take the most boring bland route for how things will play out#mostly because people seem to be unable to swallow the concept that Sansa is a flawed character who isn't perfectly sweet all the time#and the fact that their conflict is instigated by Sansa's classism#which is funny cause in the grand scheme of things her being mean to Arya is such a mild thing that opens the door to a ton of growth#never seen anybody but stansas equating her being a bully to her sister to her being evil/a villain#all we do is point out that it exists in the story...people in this fandom have no concept of nuance I stg 😭#anyways they're both complex characters and their conflict is interesting and I hope we get to see how it plays out#cause it's definitely going to be better then that trash d&d came up with 🙏🏾
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tuft of cotton candy found laying sadly in the dirt
#I can't explain but something about his death pose here just Gets Me#little guy has just Given Up#anyway guess who wasn't back warg this week and died to mines :D
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(my ii3 rewatch is going swell! i'm quite enjoying myself.)
it is sort of funny how nickel goes from blaming everything on balloon in ii2 to blaming everything on clover in ii3. he very much wants to contextualize his misfortune, wanting someone to get mad at (he doesn't like feeling in the wrong personally, and i doubt he'd like to think he's just unlucky); when he starts to get along with balloon in ii3, he needs another scapegoat, and clover's the perfect pick...
as i was saying, nickel seems to have some hidden guilt about treating balloon badly before, with his stubborn, heels-dug-in hatred of balloon fading away now that he doesn't have to save face in front of baseball and suitcase. of course, he wants to save face in front of balloon too, so he half-passes it off as box suggesting it (he always wants a passive lackey to help him push for what he really wants, huh?). nickel's caught in a limbo of not wanting to seem like he had a sudden heel-face turn/change of heart, but also wanting to express that he genuinely enjoys balloon's company (because he's actually letting himself do so now). he isn't being explicitly nice to balloon, but he's simultaneously secretive about the fact that he only did it because "box" told him to -- he doesn't want balloon to think his amicability is nothing more than obligatory, but he doesn't want to be vulnerable either. really interesting stuff.
in any event, nickel's friendlier with balloon now, so obviously balloon could no longer be his scapegoat. he still doesn't like feeling guilty for his own mistakes, nor does he enjoy his troubles being blameless, so he picks clover as his target: largely because he's cynical and can't cope with the idea of pure goodwill, happiness, and innocence which clover represents. she is everything that he isn't, but at the same time what he wants to be; he resents that. this cynicism about clover probably connects with his cynicism about balloon in ii2 -- he initially couldn't wrap his head around a manipulative person changing for the better. weirdly, he still hasn't completely gotten over balloon's heel-face turn as of now (he still doesn't believe in that kind of change, at least not fully), and yet he's still chummy with balloon. as far as i can tell, nickel is strongly projecting his own reservations onto balloon: that he himself can't change and be a good person.
#melonposting#inanimate insanity#ii#ii3#ii nickel#ii balloon#ii clover#only maintagging cuz it's actual analysis and stuff :)#did i have a tag for nickel analysis? i'm not sure#anyway... ii3 is actually pretty cool i think#still really pissed about cabby. she was really not the villain everyone made her out to be#for test tube to steal(!) all of her files - her disability aids mind you! - to try to pin her as a manipulative underhanded freak is gross#anyway. where i am at the moment i love everything about bot except that it was fan and test tube who created them :'D#like! it's so interesting! and well-written! but why fan and test tube?????? augh#i guess if anyone's getting the short end of the stick here it's testy. sorry girl#but aside from those two things it's been fun and interesting and well-written!! yay!!!
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((When I get back after this weekend... if I added Pee.ta from Hun.ger Ga.mes, Sn.ow from HG: Bal.lad, and An.akin from SW as kinda test / highly selective muses... would anyone want to write with them a tiny bit?
They wouldn't be super consistently written because this blog is meant to focus on Phantom Overdose and Black Rapture first and foremost... but, yeah, I'd like to write them some...))
#ooc.#((I would be super selective about who I wrote them with because they wouldn't be main muses...#and I would NOT be actually shipping really with Sn.ow unless it's super fucking toxic bc he cares about himself first and foremost and I#will NOT change that about his character for ANYONE.#Sn.ow will forever treat people like possessions before he'll treat them like humans / equals.#And shipping with them would be fairly selective over all but... yeah. I'd like to write them a little again (well not AGAIN for Sn.ow bc#I never had a chance to write him before but you get me). ))#((I've been back on my HG bs since my birthday.#And I'm almost ALWAYS thinking about SW stuff xD))#((There are a hundred muses I want to write again but I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THEM ALL D:))#((Like... I wanna eventually get back to my Demo Lovers muses. And maybe try my hand at David Haller bc I love him and almost no one ever#writes him D: I guess I could add muses like that as highly selective / by request and limit them to just a couple threads at a time...#ANYWAY- YEAH.))#((OH. ALSO MAYBE HAY.MITCH POST-SUNRISE IF ANYONE ELSE HAS READ IT YET.))
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He’s free!
#773#silvally#pokemon from memory#Got the helmet off yay yippee! :D#Went to bulbapedia to learn more about this guy bc I knew nothing#Had no idea it had an arceus-esque type changing setup#And that it’s partly mechanical?#Apparently that how it works. You enter a typed disc drive and then it’s that type#Which is a gimmick they’ve been exploring quite a few times#Arceus. Genesect to a limited capacity. I’m sure there’s someone else who does it#But at least three#Anyway I also found it weird that it’s “evolving” is basically just getting the helmet off and not being out of control#Bc the helmet went on to control it of course#And you evolve it with friendship so now it won’t go ape shit#But. It’s not quite evolution in the regular sense is it?#Now he’s just naked#But calmly#Whatever works I guess tho#Interesting fella nonetheless#It’s always interesting when pokemon explores ideas like this#“What if we made a guy in the lab specially designed to kill ultra beasts :D”#Pokemon research ethics boards must be quite chill#“You’re gonna make a guy? Sure man whatever I don’t care”#“My wife left me for a Mr. Mime so do whatever the fuck you want”
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Love how this outtro contains both the biggest slap in the face the show has to offer as well as arguably my favourite shot of all outtros, full stop.
#yugioh 5ds#yusei fudo#aki izayoi#akiza izinski#faithshipping#orchid watches 5ds (again)#anyway guess who deadass forgot that the recap episode was a thing that existed#I do always like seeing Carly but ep 130 is easily a contender for the most forgettable episode in the entire show#also.#the d r e a d as I realised that I've reached the final stretch of the show#like this is it. this is the final outtro.#when I tell you I literally felt my heart sink knowing I'm about to get to the final WRGP duel and the ark cradle arc#and CRY LIKE AN IDIOT OVER THE ENDING AGAIN#I'm in too deep help me#I've said it before but THE GRIP THIS SHOW HAS ON ME AFTER TEN YEARS#anyway so if you're wondering why my rewatch is going at s snail's pace now?#IT'S BECAUSE OF THIS#I'M NOT READY TO CRY DAMN IT#episode 130#screencaps
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~
#delete later#another journal entry 📝 for the void#i have not been sleeping well for the past 2 wks 😵💫 i always wake up like clockwork after 5-6 hrs which feels like not nearly enough#i feel like i've done everything there is to do (consistent exercise + consistent sleep times + earplugs + weighted blanket + no caffeine)#last night i took melatonin too but no... same problem staying asleep 😭#ahh whatever. i'm just frustrated that it has to be this way :(#anyways in an act of spite i reread like the 4 wips that have been sitting in my drafts from the past few weeks#i think something that will never cease to surprise me about writing is that more effort/time doesn't necessarily translate to better#results; i suppose that's the case with all kinds of art but#it does feel somewhat unintuitive. one of my fav professors in uni said to not dismiss those 'lightning in a bottle' moments (in art) as#blind luck... but to instead analyze the circumstances and iterate on recreating them. and i think one of my artist friends who i deeply#respect said something similar (wrt artistic rituals/setup). i have too many thoughts on writing and on my own creative processes and#weaknesses to fit into any number of tags here. :') that said...#*shakes ch2 draft* after everything i did and all the hours i spent WHY are you still so bad?!!! D: i am baffled and frustrated.#and why do i prefer this other [redacted] draft which i hammered out with utterly no regard towards the quality??#anyways. back to the drawing board i guess T.T
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i kind of want to make a videoessay about what old webcomics mean to me someday. but that'd take a load more confidence in myself so i doubt i ever will.
#i need a better rambles tag#i could write a normal essay but i know no one'd read it. don't think people pay attention to the shit i say anyways hah#but they're so interesting. kind of a part of me at this point#reading them is like looking through a window into a different time with different people but people who're fundamentally just like us#so many have been forgotten by the internet#by the world#etc#i've met very few people who know of the ones i'm fascinated by in person and neither remained in the space-#which i guess is a consequence of aging but at the same time. hey#artist guy who knew john allison in his sgr days#comics store employee who recognized my homemade sluggy freelance keychain#it's like#i feel so alone but really i'm not#i guess. something like that.#there's also this unabashed amateurishness to a lot of them that i find really wonderful#you didn't need polished art you had no one to pander to if they were there people would read them because what the hell else would they re#d?#like all you needed to make 'em was a shitty scanner or mspaint. and really that's still *all you need*#but i feel the pockets where that's all you need are disappearing#getting pushed out by shit like webtoon trying to fucking gentrify webcomics#anyways#go read something on comicfury. find a neocities page you've never heard of. get out that damn ballpoint pen and printer paper and fucking#draw. just draw. draw and write for yourself and no one else.#it doesn't need to be good you just need to make it#if there's a damn spark nourish that shit#make that stupid gag a day comic strip you wanted to make as a kid. write about kids with superpowers.#or make a soap opera comic.#let cerebus syndrome happen and ride the fucking wave.#just make some shit#this has been stupid. anyways.
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