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number1villainstan · 4 months ago

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Phasma is, apparently, having a "girl's night" with two Rebels. And not by choice.

To be fair, the two Rebels (Ren's scavenger girl, who'd introduced herself as Rey from Jakku, and that woman who'd been with FN-2187, whose name was apparently Rose Tico) aren't exactly here by choice, either. All three of them had taken a step onto what was supposed to be solid floor or ground and instead fallen through some interdimensional portal into...whatever this pillows-and-blankets-filled place was, like some skilled-but-utterly-demented fanfic writer had decided to do away with whatever flimsy premise they had in mind and just own the unbelievability of their situation. (Phasma hopes that means that she'll be returned to mere seconds after she left. That she isn't losing valuable time.) Rose and Rey had simply shrugged and gone along with it though, claiming that they "really needed some time off anyways", and given how uncertain the situation is, a fight really isn't in Phasma's best interests, so now she's going along with it too. And now they're talking about...what, Rose's boyfriend?

"...so I ended up leaving him to pay the bill."

"Honestly, good for you. I mean, I'm not really familiar with this whole dating thing, but insulting the body of someone you just met is an asshole move, no matter what. Plus, it's not even true."

(Ah, not a boyfriend then. Just a shitty first date.)

"You don't think I'm fat?"

"Uh--I mean...not really? But I meant more like being fat is a good thing. Honestly, I wish I was fatter."

Rose stares at Rey in shock. "But--why?"

"I just--look at me, Rose!" Rey held up her arms in despair. "I've been with the Resistance for over a year and I'm still just as skinny as I was on Jakku! It's like I'm still starving! I don't know what's wrong with me!"

"Are you eating until you're full?" Phasma cuts in.

Rose and Rey both turn to her spot on the floor from their perches on the provided beds. "Huh?" Rey says.

"I lived on Parnossos for the first fifteen years of my life," Phasma clarifies, and, seeing the horror on their faces, continues: "One of the things I've had to learn since then is that there's a difference between eating until you're full and merely eating until you're not hungry."

Rey licks and bites her lip in thought. "...um."

"Also," Phasma continues, "your body just may not be the type to hold onto fat well. Mine is like that too. Although that may have been the cancer."

"...cancer?" Rose asks, very very delicately. Like Phasma's fragile. Hah.

Phasma grins at her. It's not a nice one. "Parnossos, remember? Irradiated wasteland. I've had cancer five different times. Lost both my kidneys, needed a partial liver transplant, had two different kinds of skin cancers, and chopped off both my breasts." She shrugged. "Well, it was only in one breast, but I had them chop off the other because it seemed easier than dealing with a prosthetic."

"I'm never complaining about my weight again," Rose says, clearly horrified, and Phasma just laughs.

#star wars #star wars sequels #rose tico #captain phasma #sw rey #rey skywalker #rey palpatine #rey nobody #idek what to tag for her lmao #inspired by a real life event (some asshole called my little sibling fat to her face)#(little sibling if you're reading this say the word and i'll go phasma on his ass)#and trust me he is NOT finn #body image issues #as in that's a theme of the work #also lowkey (maybe highkey) nonbinary/agender Phasma vibes #like. i think she IDs as a woman but mostly out of inertia lmao #she just Does Not Care #doesn't have time for that gender shit

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fluent-in-lesbianism · 4 months ago

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I took a 6yo boy to his placement and as soon as I got him situated in the back he saw my SpongeBob driver’s license air freshener hanging on my rearview mirror. He asked if that’s really SpongeBob’s driver’s license and I said yeah it’s real. Then he asked where I got it if SpongeBob’s underwater so I told him I wore a helmet like Sandy and stole it from SpongeBob when he slept, and without missing a beat he goes “That’s identity fraud”

#kids are probably the funniest people on the planet #I love working with them #we spent the rest of the ride singing the SpongeBob theme song #and he did an almost perfect impersonation of the French guy #whenever I’d say we’re almost there he’d go ‘2 years later’#he was a whole hoot and a half

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lotrmusical · 1 year ago

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never let anyone tell you that trawling through mediocre victorian poetry isn't worth it. we just happened upon an absolute BANGER of a worm poem. go read it or else 🪱🪱🪱

#was calling beckett and scouring the works of eliza cook looking for lesbianism #good amounts of lesbianism in evidence but unfortunately very little in the way of good poetry #APART from this worm one which DOES NOT MISS #eliza cook #is there a thriving eliza cook tag on tumblr. somehow i doubt it #the hand of the giant and the heart of the brave / must turn weak and submit to the worm and the grave!#not an original theme ofc but GOD the treatment is delightful. so fresh so gleeful some rlly nice use of sound. rlly solidly constructed #words #gay belligerence

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lemonwrap · 5 months ago

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#There’s clearly a theme in my writing here #It’s okay they usually get a hug at the end or something :)#The extremely angsty wip with whump I’m working on rn goes so hard just you guys fucking wait #fandom memes #whump community #whump #lemonwrap’s misc tag

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stargirl230 · 28 days ago

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state of you // 花城

qifrey cover redraw! because i realized what's better than drawing blorbo once is drawing blorbo four times

(no reposts; reblogs appreciated)

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bereft-of-frogs · 1 year ago

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There’s that post that’s like ‘everyone should get into a tiny niche fandom at least once’ fully agree, that was really fun -- but I would like to add that everyone should get into a fandom where their opinions run counter to major fanon because it really teaches you about sticking to your guns and trusting your interpretation of the text without having to rely on peer validation

because WHAT are people talking about sometimes

#aka: genuinely sometimes I think I live in a parallel universe and simply watched/read different things #full disclosure it does make you feel like a killjoy sometimes #because often times these fanons will be presented in a silly jokey manner #'oh so silly isn't this character so funny this is just my silly little headcanon'#and it's like yes yes lol lol but ok look me in the eyes and tell me you know that this is #at best only one interpretation of many and at worst simply not supported by the text at all #please tell me you know that #or in one specific example such a ubiquitous joke that is literally a significant theme of the work and i feel like SUCH a killjoy #being like 'ok yes very funny.....you know that was a major theme right?? tell me you know that'

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crumb-crumblet-s-crumbington · 1 month ago

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bakingformers where they all work at a bakery together and nothing bad ever happens

#transformers one #transformers #elita one #orion pax #d 16 #b 127 #bumblebee #d 16 just rips sentinel in half for fun #bakingformers #food critic sentinel #“um this cream puff is too sweet”#and d 16 rips him in half #😭😭😭😭#everyone is like 😧 IJOJHK:LDMRJL #this is sucha stupid AU #but its so cute and indulgent i cant help myself #im working on a very canon compliant animation rn too so im allowing myself to have fun #orion banned from kitchen #okay but slightly unrelated but i can NAWT see orion beeing a good cook #like maybe optimus yeah but ORION #orion cooks like the way a college frat boy would #d 16 making a very warming delicious stew while orion is eating the concoction he made from the various leftover ingrediants in his fridge #i like to think elita likes to indulge in making her pastries very pretty #she tries to act all noncholant about it but bee is like “WOW!! these are soo pretty! how did you do that!!!”#and all of a sudden shes all chalant #LOL #i think d 16 would really like making themed desserts LOL #megatronous prime cupcake and hes litterally shaking trying to frost it perfectly and hes trying SO hard LOOL

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elucubrare · 5 months ago

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there's this horrible school of attempted literary criticism on here that holds that 1. everything in any given author's work is autobiographical, especially if it seems "real" and 2. those themes seeped into the work subconsciously, revealing something about the author that they're either trying to hide or unaware of themself. it drives me up a wall, since it seems to deny the fundamental skills that make people good writers: the empathy to imagine and portray experiences that one hasn't had oneself and the ability to take one's personal emotional experiences or worldview and fold them, consciously, into the unworked clay of a narrative.

#there's a tolkien post that's the bane of my fucking existence -#it's something like 'wwi was normal for me anyway here's a book about how war changes you forever'#and i don't know why you'd think 1. that he didn't know wwi was painful for him #2. that those themes are *unintentional*#anyway it comes up lots of other places -#the 'naive' or 'artless' work is Truer & so This Happened Accidentally #not 'someone thought about this and did it skillfully so it's good'#i'm spiteful today sorry #god i have so many mean thoughts about this tendency vs. the way people talk about ai art

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fisherrprince · 2 months ago

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it’s not necessarily that I hate the themes most prevalent in fiction set in the real world and it’s not necessarily that I don’t like stories revolving around real people or relationship drama or interpersonal issues it’s more like im a dog who doesn’t recognize that a pill is still a pill if it has peanut butter on it. I need like the little peanut butter spoonful that is aliens or robots or monsters or time travel or something fantastical and not at all down to earth real life so that you can approach me and be like “this story is about how friendships can deteriorate over time and also how this guy feels bad for being a bad friend and causing his buddy problems with their girlfriend” and then look at me making a face at you and be like “AND! they’re all aliens who are doing all that across spacetime” and I’ll be like OHHHHHH OKAY YAY (shlop shlap shlup the sound of a dog horking down peanut butter pills) wow what a poignant story

#kipspeak #I tend to gravitate away from things that are that close to real life for reasons im still sussing out. Feels like work? Feels too direct?#Maybe it’s just not fun? But you could tell the EXACT SAME story just with magic sword knights and I’ll be like YAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYY #I dunno. I feel like that’s slightly shallow of me but I also feel like I don’t care and it’s my house and I can think stories set on norma #Earth with nothing else different are boring #It’s like when they’re real life like that #Every theme they try to get across comes and sits in my house and goes Hey. I’m telling you about YOU and THE WORLD.#And im like ugh. Okay. Whereas magic sword knights do that and im like omg…. They’re telling us about You and The World. That’s crazy……#It is also maybe a little bit that I don’t like interpersonal drama as the driving focus of a story #They should go to space about it #otherwise im in class and I need to adopt an entirely different mindset to be able to have fun with what you just gave me #man these guys aren’t even furries. Lame dude……

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anzekopistar · 2 months ago

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