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all-our-turf · 3 months ago

Text

oh, but you're good to me

Swan and Mercy talk about Sully. Swan somehow knows exactly what Mercy needs to hear.

minor tw for discussion of past abuse but nothing graphic. read under the cut or on ao3

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The others liked to joke about it. Liked to tease Swan about being so down bad she let a stranger follow them around, about her being so weak for a pretty face that she didn’t chase Mercy off despite her nearly getting them caught up in a rumble, about her falling so quickly that she was making Mercy a Warrior three hours after meeting her.

Mercy usually laughed along with them, delighting in the blush that would bloom across Swan’s face and the way she would glare at whoever was making the joke at her expense (or, if it was Ajax, the way she would do more than glare). They all claimed Swan’s feelings were obvious looking back on it, because she wouldn’t have let anyone else stick around the way Mercy did. Especially not when they were already running from every other gang in the city and worried about finding enemies at every corner.

At one point Cochise tried to say she had known all along, which had immediately prompted loud disbelieving protests from Cowgirl and Rembrandt (“That’s some fuckin’ bullshit!” “What happened to just another solider?”).

But despite how amusing all their teasing was, Mercy couldn’t help but wonder. Because Swan never gave a real answer when she had asked her in the subway tunnel.

Why stick up for a stranger, in spite of the danger?

For all the others liked to tease her about it, Mercy knew it wasn’t just because Swan thought she was pretty - Swan had always seen beyond that.

Swan, who was overly cautious, who was fiercely protective of her crew, let Mercy follow them even when she nearly got them jumped by the Orphans. Even when she mouthed off to the Hurricanes on their behalf barely fifteen minutes later. Even when the Warriors were already more vulnerable than they’d ever been, and for all she knew Mercy could’ve put them in even more danger.

Mercy might’ve argued about it at the time, but Ajax wasn’t really wrong to be suspicious. Wasn’t wrong to question why Swan wasn’t doing something about the random chick who was following them around on the worst night of their lives.

It didn’t make sense. However long Mercy thought about it, however she tried to spin it in her head, she couldn’t figure it out.

And, well, Mercy had never been good at keeping quiet once something was on her mind.

“Hey, can I ask you something?” Mercy had just finished changing into a pair of sleep shorts and an oversized shirt, both of which were definitely pilfered from Swan’s drawers. Swan was already in bed, reading some new mystery novel she’d picked up at the library that week.

Swan looked up from her book, a concerned furrow already between her brows. “Yeah? What’s wrong?”

“Why you always gotta assume something’s wrong, huh?” Mercy huffed playfully, coming to sit next to her girlfriend on the bed. She’d never met anyone as quick to worry as Swan was. “It’s nothing bad. I was just…wonderin’ about something.”

“Okay?” Swan said slowly, marking the page in her book and setting it on her nightstand so she could properly face Mercy. Mercy couldn’t help but smile a a little at that - at the way Swan always gave Mercy her full attention, the way she actually looked at Mercy in a way no one else ever bothered to.

“Why did you let me follow you guys?” Mercy finally asked. “That night, I mean.”

Swan flinched a little at the mention of that night - an immediate reaction all the Warriors still hadn’t managed to stifle, even months later - and her eyes widened a bit in surprise. She cocked her head to the side, studying Mercy.

“What do you mean?” She asked carefully. Anyone else would’ve assumed Swan was avoiding the question. Mercy knew she was just trying to make sure she understood whatever Mercy was really asking.

“I know the others joke about it, but it really doesn’t make sense. You didn’t know me. It was a risk to let me come along.”

“I knew you weren’t a threat.”

“Okay, bitch -”

“Wait, no I didn’t mean it like that,” Swan rushed to correct, reaching out to grab one of Mercy’s hands. “Not that you weren’t capable of being a threat. Just that you weren’t one to us. That you weren’t following us to try and start shit.”

Mercy raised an eyebrow, a little disbelieving. Because how could Swan possibly know that when their very first interaction was quite literally Mercy trying to start shit?

Swan considered her words for a moment, fidgeting mindlessly with Mercy’s fingers. Mercy waited patiently. She was never bothered by Swan’s quiet, she knew that it only made whatever Swan had to say all the more important.

Finally, Swan broke the silence.

“Sully.” She said his name carefully, glancing up to watch Mercy’s reaction.

It was Mercy who was taken aback this time, because that was the last name she expected to hear from Swan’s mouth. “What about him?”

Swan hesitated, biting the inside of her cheek the way she did when she was thinking about something. “He was going to hit you.”

Mercy felt her stomach twist. She looked away, suddenly not liking where this conversation was heading.

Swan squeezed her hand, her voice softening. “It didn’t sound like it would have been the first time.”

Mercy, I’m losing my cool…

Mercy clenched her jaw, pulling her hand away to wrap her arms defensively around her middle. “Is that what it was? Pity? You wanted to save the poor Orphan girl?”

“No.” Swan’s answer was firm. “I didn’t save you. You saw a chance with the Warriors and you took it. You were tough enough to make that choice for yourself, to get yourself out of that situation. I never pitied you. I mean, for fuck’s sake, you called Sully a bitch to his face and didn’t even back down when he grabbed you. Why would I pity you?”

Mercy tentatively looked up, swallowing harshly past the lump that had formed in her throat. Swan was still watching her, but none of the pity that Mercy was worried about was there in her expression.

“I let you stay with us because I knew you weren’t a liability. Even beyond the fact that no one deserves to put up with whatever Sully was trying to pull - you never once seriously believed that we had killed Cyrus.” And oh, Mercy hadn’t realized how much that must’ve meant to Swan, how indicative that must’ve been of Mercy’s perspective of the Warriors.

We didn’t kill Cyrus, we’re tryna get home.

They spent the entire night running for something they hadn’t done because no one believed them. But Mercy did. Mercy didn’t even consider the alternative.

“You chose to join us even when the entire city was after us, and were immediately putting yourself in danger for us even though you didn’t need to. Cleon probably would have killed me if I ran you off and made you go back to whatever you had to deal with with the Orphans. If we had met on any other night, we probably would’ve tried to recruit you anyways.” Swan shifted closer, giving Mercy time to pull away as she reached out again to grab Mercy’s hands. “The Orphans didn’t deserve you. Sully sure as fuck didn’t.”

Mercy exhaled shakily, blinking rapidly against the sudden wetness that pooled in her eyes. It slipped down her face anyway. She didn’t know what she expected from this conversation, but it certainly wasn’t this. She didn’t know why she was still surprised every time Swan proved just how incredible she was - how thoughtful and observant she could be, how she had really seen Mercy from the start.

Mercy must’ve been quiet for too long, because she saw the moment Swan started to worry she’d fucked up, her expression turning uncertain.

“You’re sweet.” Mercy squeezed Swan’s hands in hers, offering a wobbly smile. The words didn’t feel like nearly enough, so after a moment she moved forward to straddle Swan’s lap, wrapping around her and burying her face in Swan’s shoulder. Swan’s arms immediately came up to hold her.

“Do you…want to talk about it?” Swan ventured carefully after a moment. She didn’t have to specify what she meant.

Mercy chewed on her bottom lip. She almost said no out of instinct. She hadn’t brought it up before, too worried about how it would change the way the others treated her, how Swan would treat her - but Swan had put it together in their first meeting. And she didn’t think less of Mercy for it.

“It really wasn’t all that often,” she finally mumbled, keeping her forehead pressed to Swan’s shoulder and playing the fabric of her shirt. “He was just…a boy with a fragile ego. Sometimes he’d lose a fight or some shit and needed to take his anger out somewhere else to feel more like a man. I’d mouth off a little too much and he’d decide he had something to prove.”

Swan tensed underneath her, letting out an angry puff of air, but she didn’t interrupt. She just tightened her grip on Mercy, pressing a feather light kiss to the side of her head and giving her the space to keep going.

God, Mercy loved her more than anything.

“I fought back a few times. I imagine that was why he didn’t try and start shit more often. Wasn’t worth the bruises he’d also end up walking away with. But - well. I didn’t have anywhere else to go and he knew it.” Mercy clenched her jaw, willing her voice to stop shaking. She felt like her insides were trembling. “I stayed because I knew - I thought the alternative would be worse. Sully convinced me it would be. He gave me a place to stay, I didn’t have to worry all that much about meals, and he always said that he was keeping me safe from other gangs. Even claimed that he was protecting me from the other Orphans. He didn’t like when his guys would leer at me - he thought that I was his, I guess. And that meant the other Orphans couldn’t touch me, so I let Sully get away with how he’d treat me. I thought it was the only way to survive. Wasn’t until - until I saw you and the other Warriors that I finally decided I wanted more. That I realized I could have more.”

Mercy finally straightened, pulling away slightly so she could be face to face with Swan, her arms still wrapped loosely around Swan’s shoulders. Swan looked at her, soft and affectionate even as Mercy could feel Swan’s hands curling and uncurling behind her back.

“You’re angry,” Mercy commented, idly curling her fingers in Swan’s hair. “It’s okay, Swan. I’m okay.”

“You should not be trying to comfort me right now,” Swan murmured, leaning in to rest her forehead against Mercy’s. Swan let out a slow breath, splaying her palms out over Mercy’s back. “I want to kill him.”

“I figured you would,” Mercy huffed, a little amused at her protectiveness. “He’s not worth it.”

“You didn’t deserve what he did to you. None of it. You know that right?”

Mercy’s expression twisted. “It was stupid of me to stay as long as I did.”

“Hey - no. You said it yourself - you were just trying to survive. You did what you could in that situation.” Swan reached up, gently wiping away the tear tracks on Mercy’s face. “You’re one of the strongest people I know, baby.”

Mercy scoffed wetly, looking away.

“I’m serious. I can’t imagine how scared you must’ve been stuck with the Orphans, but you didn’t - you didn’t let them break you. You’re still a - how’d you put it? Walkin’ talkin’ fire breathin’ controversy?”

That managed to pull a smile out of Mercy. Swan grinned in response.

“You walked out of there with your head held high, even after all the shit he put you through. And I’m so glad that you did. That you followed us all the way to Coney and decided to stay, so we could give you the community you deserved to have.”

Mercy felt like her chest was going to burst with warmth. “You’ve given me that and more.”

Swan grabbed at Mercy’s waist to tug her even closer, pressing kisses against Mercy’s nose and forehead and cheeks until Mercy dissolved into breathless giggles.

“Mercy,” Swan said with sudden seriousness, making sure Mercy was looking at her. Mercy blinked, tilting her head at the determined set to Swan’s jaw. “I want you to know that I’d never hurt you, not like he did. I - I know I can get angry sometimes and that I can get into it with the others - well, mainly Ajax, I guess - but I swear I’d never lay a hand on you, okay?”

Mercy smiled softly, melting further into Swan’s body and wondering if Swan knew just how perfect she was. Wondering how Swan managed to make her fall more in love every day. She reached up to tenderly cradle Swan’s face in her hands.

“I know. Honestly, I’ve never even considered that a possibility. You…” Mercy ran her fingers along the edges of Swan’s face, reveling in the feeling of having Swan’s arms wrapped protectively around her in a way that would make her feel claustrophobic if it was anyone else. “You make me feel safe. You always have.”

Swan smiled a little at that before her expression turned serious again. “I also want you to know that if - if for whatever reason it doesn’t end up working out with us -“ Mercy made a vague noise of disagreement.

“Hypothetically,” Swan rushed to add. “Just - your place in the Warriors isn’t dependent on me, okay? I need you to know that. You don’t ever have to be worried about not having anywhere else to go because you are a Warrior now. As yourself, not as my girlfriend.”

“Oh,” Mercy breathed. She hadn’t realized just how badly she needed to hear those words until something inside of her finally settled. She marveled again at how well Swan knew her.

Mercy tightened the grip she still had on Swan’s face and surged forward to kiss her. Swan made a muffled noise of surprise and fell onto her back, and Mercy broke away to laugh, settling her weight more comfortably on top of Swan.

“I love you,” Mercy whispered quietly into the space between them, because what else could she say? She’d been wholly unprepared for the turn this conversation had taken, and the rush of emotion was almost overwhelming.

“I love you too,” Swan responded easily, and Mercy wondered if she’d ever get tired of hearing those words.

#took a break from the usual swan and ajax angst to write some mercy angst #anyways this is not a safe space for sully #mercy deserves the world and swan wants to give it to her #short fic i wrote in between working on the polycule fic #(that one is still in progress dw)#warriors musical #warriors album #warriors concept album #swan #mercy #swercy #swan x mercy #fic #andi writes

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