#besides I really needed to finish this section and pass to the next one

[forgettable-au]

FORGETTABLE-AU (Page 57-60)

* That was a long entry...

[BEGINNING] [PREVIOUS] [CONTINUE]

[aloneatpeace]

𝐑𝐞𝐟𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

2. Brave or stupid

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.→✒️:★: ͜͡✿͜͡ →. Let me know what you guys think about this chapter i have a lot of ideas that i want to throw it into the plot that doesn't feel forced and also want to have the dynamic with character feel natural in the ocs nature i hope I can do that have a good reading ❤️

Tw : body shaming ( don't do it if you see someone doing this to someone throw hands )

The next day you were alone in the bus to the school, Jun-tae had texted that he needed to something that he would be gone earlier than usual. You didn’t see him at the library either walking around the hallway you hear surprised whispers of your peers who all are rejoicing after receiving their lost phones.

That’s only makes you more paranoid, you know its Jun-tae and other guys are behind it they would steal the phones because of Hyo man makes them to do so. Jun-tae’s sudden invitation to eat lunch together and now this makes your theory true. He’s rebelling against Hyo-man but why suddenly? What made him or who made him change his mind to stand up against Hyo-man was really brave or stupid because his what he did comes with consequence that going ends with him getting hurt.

You hear rushed footsteps pass by the library loud enough for the librarian to grumble under her breath mutter how students have no discipline whatsoever. You hurriedly finish your work as well scrabbling to put the books that you took struggling to do under the watchful eyes of your librarian. You sprinted your class and place your notes in your table as you do your ear catches the girl’s words.

   “My boyfriend just texted me saying there is fight at their side.”

“Really? Between who?”

“Choi Hyo-man and the transferred boy”

One of the girl’s eyes widen “Oh, the pyscho boy?”

“I heard that he killed his fellow student that why he came here.”

Another girl scoff “He didn’t kill, he sends that boy into a coma.”

Not waiting to hear any further you tread towards the boy’s section of the building, running up the stairs you almost pumps into a boy making you stumble back a hand clasp itself on your wrist steadying you briefly so silently you almost didn’t feel the touch.

Si-eun round brown hues falls your frame standing too close to him, he let his hands fall limp beside him after steadying you. eyes scanning as you gulp wide warm eye staring up at his cold ones stepping aside muttering apology for bumping on to him almost, you seem to do that a lot.

Jun-tae looks surprised at your sudden appearance he uttering your name making you glance at him and your apologetic eyes turns into worried one seeing beaten up Jun-tae. “Oh my god. What happened? Are you alright?”

“I’m alright. He saved me back there.” Jun-tae said with smile that reached his eye looking at si-eun with a grateful look.

You glance at Si-eun and back at him, Jun-tae turns and open the slide door “What are you doing?. We’re going to see the nurse.”

“We can’t go to the nurse’s office.” Jun-tae walks inside you follow him si-eun stands outside for minute before following after the both of you.

You and Jun-tae sits down the floor while si-eun stands in front you both, opening the first aid you sit straight taking it from Jun-tae’s hands as he and Si-eun talks.

“Whenever, we go there the nurse realize what’s happened, so Hyo-man gets called to the teacher’s office all the time and we just get beaten up again. Its an endless cycle.”

You take a cotton swabs, q tip and fucidin cream and hands one to Jun-tae and Si-eun “Fucidin cream is pretty much an antibiotic” Jun-tae says using the mirror to lay it over his bruised cheek, when Si-eun didn’t take it, you hesitantly dab it on his bleeding knuckle making him look down at as you do so.

“You have to use it because, Hyo-man’s fists are like balls of germs.” You chuckle at Jun-tae words he too smiles at his comment.

“Why did you do it?” Si-eun asks you and Jun-tae turns to him “Why did you return all the phones?”

You glance back Jun-tae wanting to know the answer only to be confused when he answers “Newton’s third law. For every good action a good reaction follows.”

“What?” you scrunch your nose puzzled at his reasoning you don’t remembering Newton’s third law like that and it seems like si-eun is on same boat with you as he also looked confused for minute.

“That’s not what it means.” He says the three of you look at each other before you sigh setting the cream down inside the box.

“He’s not gonna sit down and do nothing.” You speak up making Jun-tae and Si-eun glance at you. “You two should be careful, Hyo-man is cunning.” Standing up you dust your skirt.

Jun-tae calls your name making you turns to him “it will be fine, Baku’s going to come back sooner or later. Gotak was there too.” He stands up as well. “Let’s sit together at lunch.” Jun-tae eyes shift from you and Si-eun the last words directed towards both of you.

You glance at Si-eun expectedly wanting to know that he’s comfortable too with the invitation and your intrusion. Si-eun feels the weight of yours and Jun-tae gaze on him making him sigh and nod. You and Jun-tae smile at that “Well, I see you guys at lunch. Take care.” With that you leave.

When the lunch time rolled in Si-eun watches Jun-tae eyes scan the crowed searching for you and he too wounder where you had gone. Si-eun catches Jun-tae eyes trained group of girls who is on the other side laughing and chatting as they have their lunch, Jun-tae take his phone out his pocket pressing your chat he sends texts but gets no response he slums in his chair Si-eun sits straight setting his utensils down.

“What is it?she not coming?”

Jun-tae glance up his from his phone “I should just call her.” he dials your number and in on the second ring you pick up. “Where are you?

Are you coming to lunch.

Oh, alright.

Did you eat anything?

Mmhm. I see you tomorrow then.”

Jun-tae slumps in his chair before picking up his utensils and staring to eat Si-eun waits for him to say what you told him feeling his gaze on him Jun-tae looks up “Oh she said she has work to submit, so she and her friends can go out to the mall after class. she also said you to eat well”

Si-eun was doing the opposite truthfully, making him look down his food before he glances at Jun-tae and then to the other side where the group of girls sat “Friends?��� 

Jun-tae nod sigh. After lunch they both walk towards their class Jun-tae steps rushed as he walks ahead reaching their classroom. He rummages through his bag while Si-eun’s eyes followed him, the break time isn’t over yet.

Jun-tae smile in relief after finding a chocolate bar he turns to Si-eun “I’ll be right back.” Si-eun nod knowing where he’s rushing to.

You sigh cracking your knuckles in satisfaction glancing at the assignment which is due today, “still got it.” you glance up hearing footsteps coming towards you fearing it’s the librarian who might have caught you taking Jun-tae’s call. But thankfully its Jun-tae himself who’s walking towards you.

“Jun-tae, what are you doing here?” he stands in front of you smiling he extend his hand offering a chocolate candy in palm.

“I’m sorry it all I have, and don’t say you have eaten. I know you didn’t.” Jun-tae places the candy in front of you, smiling warmly at his gesture you take it and opening the candy eat it one go.

“Sorry I couldn’t eat with lunch with you guys.” You stand gathering your material in your hands Jun-tae shake his head and walk along side.

“Are you really going to the mall after class?” Jun-tae ask carefully, eyes scanning your face he feels himself get flustered enthusiastically nodding heading bobbing with a wide smile.

“Yes, we are. And I’m thinking if I should get my nails done or buy something. It going to be fun they said we can try out dresses.” Your eyes lit up as you ramble about what you and your friends are going out.

 “Why not do both since you want both?” Jun-tae asks as you both round the hallway to the teacher office.

“I want to but since its planned suddenly I don’t have much money.” You set the assignment on the teacher’s table.

Jun-tae feels your hand clasping on his wrist before he can pull out his wallet you glare at him playfully “don’t even think about it. you need to buy bandage and proper medicine, it might swell.” With your hands still clasped on his wrist the both of you walkout the teacher’s office.

Jun-tae’s ear and neck turns red at touch of your hand “Oh, what happened why are you so red?” you tilt your head to side lowering your head to look at his face which he hides by looking down.

“I’m alr—alright.” Jun-tae stutter through his word avoiding your eye the shrilling sound bell ringing making you sigh.

“I’ll see you tomorrow then?”

He nods walking back stumbling over his own foot making you look at him worried he just smiles walking away. Shrugging it off you walk towards your classroom already excited evening.

 When the evening arrived you, Yuri, mina and sara take the bus to the nearest mall.  Mina and sara sit across from you while you and Yuri sits together scrolling on her phone

You glance at her with a smile, eyes shining in excitement at the thought of sharing something with your friends “Should we all get like matching clips?”

“That is so basic and cliché you know.” she says without looking up from her phone her fingers rapidly typing on the screen and you hear Sara and mina laughing making you glance at them. you sigh nodding along.

When you reach the mall, they walk ahead you drag your feet slightly exhausted shoulders feeling heavy they walk into cloth store looking through you too follow going through racks of clothes all are slightly pricy but everything looks so beautiful that you lost yourself and find yourself picking up a flowy light purple dress with long bell sleeves and square neckline pulling out in rack you feel material and price is reasonable its such a pretty dress.

You walk to the counter where you can hear their voice chatting Mina look surprised to see you as if she forgot that you even were with them before her eyes falls on the dress on your hands “Oh I thought you left us all alone?” the two turns at her word to look at you they look surprised as well.

You shake your head with a smile “I found this dress, isn’t it pretty.?” Mina nods taking the dress from your hand.

“It is but I don’t think this is your color at all” she pouts “and I don’t think its gonna you know…. fit”

Your face fall but you shake your head “No its my size and my mom made my uniform bit loose. I think its gonna fit perfectly.” You glance at cashier women “Maybe I can try it on, I’ll just ask her.”

Mina gives the dress to Yuri “Did you want to buy hairclip; we can do that while they wait at the counter. They will ask for you right?” she glance at them they exchange a look before nodding.”

Mina hooks her arms on yours pulling you away from the store before you can answer, you look through various ones all look so pretty and cute, you pick one holding it up to show mina who’s busy typing away on her phone. “Should I get this” she glances up before nodding.

When the two of you walks back to them, they are already out of the store with bags in their hands “Oh you guys didn’t have to pay for that?”

Yuri looks at you with sigh “We didn’t buy, we left it the counter to try on our dress but someone else took it.”

“Yeah, we looked everywhere. We couldn’t find it.” Sara said “We should go it’s getting dark.” Mina nod taking the bag Yuri held out in her direction. They start walking you follow them with heavy heart you glance at the store one last time.

Your steps were heavy as you walk through the street to your home shoulder heavy as your back bag pulling you down along with exhaustion and sadness weighted swinging the small paper bag that has your hairclip in your hands your movement slow down when you hear a footsteps behind you turning back you see a guy from your neighborhood that weird one you always hated you quickly take your phone out thankfully you have enough battery left make phone call. You call your mom she answers on the second ring she isn’t home yet ask you if your reached home you mumble last part not wanting the guy to hear. The footsteps now closer making you feel angered and scared at the same time you want to turns to yell at him but at the same time you can’t.

The two boys sitting outside the store looks up at sudden footsteps rushing past them into the store, they recognizes the uniform your wearing they go back to what they were doing but that cut off by when they hear shuffling of feet they look up to see a guy standing at side of the street looking at the store they follow his line of sight and see you inside talking into your phone nodding into your phone you pick up a packet of chip and walks to the cashier not so subtlety glancing outside.

One hand gripping the snack along with a paper bag and other hand gripping on your phone you step out the store before starting speedwalking to your home not sparing glance to anywhere but ahead, you hear the footsteps behind you after few minutes then you almost breaking into a sprint you hear the footsteps coming up fast then there is some shuffling and then nothing you don’t look back and starts and break into a sprint dropping things in your hands you round  just as you round the corner you turn to look back all you see two guys their face hidden as one stands Infront of the other while other one crouched on the floor as he pick up the things you left behind with bloody knuckles.

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[ameliathornromance]

Today had been a complete mess.

First, you’d dropped a whole basket of freshly caught fish, where they’d splattered all over the ground and got covered in mud from the rain fall earlier.

As you bent down to pick them up, that didn’t stop a few passing Orcs from complaining about your clumsiness.

“Great, now we have to eat dirt.”

“Who let the human carry them anyway?”

Ok, ok, alright. You’ll be eating this food too, you get where the others are coming from and you could have been a little bit more careful.

You gave them all an apologetic smile, turned and approached the Chef at the other end of the camp.

“I’m really sorry about that,” you said to him, handing off the basket. “I’ll try to be more careful in the future.”

Chef – who seemed to have heard the other Orcs snide comments – waved a dismissive hand. “They can be as grumpy as they want, everyones’ got to eat their speck of dirt.” He comforted you with a smile.

Although the sting of the comments didn’t leave, Chef’s words certainly lessened the hurt of them. You returned the his smile, and left to go and carry on with your other duties.

But it seemed as though the world had other plans. Your next task, was to weave fishing nets. The camp was going to be approaching a river soon and salmon would be making their way upstream, so it was imperative that these nets are finished.

The only problem being, that as soon as you were done with knotting one net and prepared to move onto the next one, your freshly finished work would fray.

The other Orc who was weaving with you, examined your work.

She frowned as she examined it. “How’d you manage this?” She asked, tugging at a particularly unkempt section of your work.

And with that, all your hard work came undone, collecting in a pile of rope at the Orcs feet.

Your jaw dropped. Weaving nets was one of the many things you’d gotten good at since you arrived at the camp, it made no sense that your work would decline so suddenly.

“I don’t understand… I did everything right!” You protested.

The Orc frowned, picking up the now unusable rope and narrowed her eyes at it, running her thumb over the frays. She sighed and looked at you. “You’re just having an awful time of it, aren’t you? First it was the fish and now it’s this,” She looked back down at the rope. “We bought this rope from a different merchant, so it might just be shoddy material.” She handed you her unfinished net. “Here, finish this and I’ll make a note of it.”

You set to work again. This time, you made sure your knots for the net were tied twice, pulled extra tight and revisited them to make sure that they hadn’t fallen apart while you were working at the rest of it.

When the Orc came back, you showed her the work you’d done. She scrutinised your work once again and took the net from you.

Only for all the knots you’d double-triple checked to unravel. You stared, dumbfounded at the net.

The Orc sighed, closing her eyes and trying to hide her irritation. “Do you just want to take a minute?” She asked you. “Maybe go and do something else for a little while.”

It wasn’t a suggestion.

You made yourself scarce and found yourself standing alone in the middle of camp. What was going on with you?

Mentally, you ran through your morning: you’d woken up at a regular time, you’d had breakfast like normal, kissed your boyfriend goodbye when he left to go hunting and gotten to work on helping the camp out.

Nothing seemed to be out of order about your morning. Maybe the Weaver was right, perhaps you just needed a break; it’s important to have a healthy work-life balance after all.

So, you returned to your tent. When you stepped into the tent, you frowned at the mess inside it. You were a clean person… your Orc Boyfriend however, was a completely different story.

He always left his clothes strewn about, sharp bladed weapons lying on the ground or propped up against your bed frame. He always told you it wasn’t dangerous to sleep with the pointed tip of a blade beside your pillow; But you found it hard to believe when your Boyfriend had nearly poked his eye out on numerous occasions.

Well, putting things away isn’t a difficult task, is it? And your tent needs to be cleaned before you can relax anyway.

Scooping up any dirty clothes on the ground, you threw them into a basket in the corner, picked up weapons, books lying around, as a strange thing your partner had been building on the table in the corner of your tent.

He wouldn’t tell you what it was, all he said was that it was held together with glue and that it needed time to dry. So, you’d left it alone mostly.

However, you did wish he could be more neat about how he stored all his equipment.

After putting away all the books and putting the weapons away in a safer place, you started to rearrange the small parts of wood and other materials your partner had been using.

The project itself seemed to be a jumble of sticks all pointing out in different directions, completely unidentifiable.

It was all going so well. It was, blissfully fine… until you turned too fast and sent your boyfriends project crashing to the floor.

Everything had gone slow as you fumbled to reach it. You watched in horror as you missed it, and the wooden craft smashed on the ground. All the hard work your boyfriend had put in to it, gone in under a minute.

And to add icing on the cake, your Orc boyfriend opened the tent flaps and saw you, hunched over his work.

The two of you locked eyes, stared at each other in stunned silence.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t-”

Your boyfriend let out a disappointed sigh. “I told you not to touch it, didn’t I?”

At his tone, your eyes began to water, and you burst into tears.

Your boyfriends disappointment vanished and he rushed over to you, “hey, don’t cry love, I wasn’t trying to make you-”

“It’s been like this all day.” You spoke over him, tears running down your cheeks. “Everything I seemed to do, just fell apart or went wrong. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I’m really sorry I didn’t mean to break it.”

Your Orc placed his hand on your shoulder as he listened to your wracked sobs. His hand rubbed up and down your back, “it’s okay, you’re okay, alright? It was a mistake, you didn’t mean to do it.”

After a few minutes, your sobs quieted, only leaving you sniffling. “I don’t know what I’m doing wrong.” You mumbled.

“You haven’t done anything wrong.” Your boyfriend pulled you into his lap and squeezed you tightly. “It’s just a bad day, okay? Life is just like this sometimes, yeah?”

He planted a kiss on your forehead and gave you a tight squeeze. “Look, why don’t you take the rest of the day off, and I’ll go and do whatever you’re supposed to do, okay?”

You nodded. The two of you stood as your boyfriend picked up the broken project he was working on.

“I’m really sorry.” You said, again.

“Love, it’s fine really. I wasn’t even enjoying it that much anymore.” He gave you a smile, “I felt like I was in too deep to stop it now, so you actually did me a favour.”

You didn’t think he was telling the truth, but you still returned his smile, thankful that he was trying to make you feel better.

Hi! Thank you so much for reading my story! If you like this kind of content, you should check out my Patreon! There, I post stories twice a week and earlier than I post on Tumblr. I also post exclusive stories there too where you won’t be able to find anywhere else.

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[queen-of-deans-booty]

Never Give Up

Pairing: Rockstar!Jensen Ackles x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~2.5k

Warnings: complete fluff, getting blood drawn so needles and blood

Summary: Jensen is in town for his next concert and visit you for a check-up before performing. You two have known each other for your whole life since his sister is your best friend, and he never fails to ask you out every time he sees you. You’ve always said no. It’s his mission to get you to say yes.

Square Filled: rockstar!jensen (2022) for @spndeanbingo

Author’s Note: any and all comments are appreciated <3

x

You grab another vial of blood and mark down in the system which patient of yours this belongs to. Afterward, you place it inside a medical plastic bag and set it off to the side for the lab to pick up later. Today has been non-stop tending to patients, drawing blood, and taking vitals. You’re only halfway through your shift and you feel like your head is going to explode.

“Did you see his post?” another nurse asks as she and her friend walk into the office. “God, he looks so hot. I can’t believe he’s single.”

“I bet he’s fucking random fans every show he does. I could be one of those fans if I got tickets. Can you believe even the nosebleeds are two hundred bucks?”

You don’t need to hear his name to know who they’re talking about. There is only one artist that is big enough in the news right now. He’s been on a steady incline to fame ever since he left Texas for California.

“Do you think he’s good in bed?”

You roll your eyes at that but don’t comment on it. You just want to do your job and go home. You can’t be sitting here thinking about your best friend’s brother and how much of an arrogant bastard he is who thinks the world revolves around him. It doesn’t help that he has a major crush on you, and he isn’t afraid to show it. Besides him telling you every time he calls you how much he likes you, he’ll always try to show you either with flowers, dinner, or other small presents that he has mailed to you.

There isn’t a time that goes by when he’s with you that he doesn’t try and ask you out on a date. If he was just your best friend’s brother, you would consider it. It’s the fact that he’s an up-and-coming rockstar who isn’t near his peak that has you on the edge. You know rockstars. You dated a few of them. All they care about is music, money, and sex. They’ll get it anywhere from any woman who is willing to spread her legs for them. You’re not saying Jensen is like that, but you don’t want to be a notch on his belt.

Still, that doesn’t stop you from using your vibrator and fantasizing about him.

A few days pass without incident when you’re inputting patients into the computer. The same two coworkers who were talking about Jensen before come strolling in with big smiles on their faces.

“What’s got you two looking like that?”

“Jensen is in town for his concert.”

“Did you two get tickets?”

“No, but I know of a way inside. I have someone working security.”

You’d rather not sit here and watch them fangirl over him so you decide to finish your paperwork later and check on the patients. Your best friend, Sabrina, pulls you to the side as soon as she sees you.

“I need you to take the patient in Room 15.”

“Why? That’s your section.”

“Please? I can’t do it.”

“Why?” you ask, your eyes narrowing.

“He’s my brother. They won’t let me work on him.”

Jensen is here. You think about what it might mean if he sees you entering the room and think it’s better than sending the fangirls in there with him.

“Fine. You owe me.” You start to walk away from her with the blood draw supplies and pause. “Don’t tell the other girls. They’ll cause a riot.”

You walk to Room 15 and knock twice before entering. Jensen is sitting on the small table with the paper lined for people’s safety even though half the time, it gets crumbled and tossed out of the way. He is scrolling through his phone but it’s not that that has you staring in awe. He is wearing a tight black shirt that really shows off his muscles and tattoos and dusty blue jeans that you know hug his ass so nicely, all with a backward hat on. His hair peeks out the back of his hat. It was shorter than the last time you saw him.

There’s a new image for your fantasies.

“Growing out your hair, huh?”

Jensen’s head snaps up at the sound of your voice, and he gives you a thousand-watt smile. He immediately puts his phone away so that he can give you all of his attention.

“I was hoping Sabrina would send you in here.”

“Oh, you’re lucky it’s me and not the two fangirls out there. I’m pretty sure one of them wants to have sex with you.”

“What about you? Do you want to have sex with me?”

You smile shyly and grab two latex gloves to start the blood-drawing process. “You wish.”

“Yeah, I do.”

You wrap a tourniquet around his upper arm before grabbing his arm and rubbing the area with an alcohol swab to sterilize the area. Don’t think about his big muscles. Focus, Y/N! You open a packet that contains a new needle and place it where you need to. Without counting down, you stick the needle into his vein and start to grab blood samples.

“So, come here often?” he flirts.

“I work here,” you giggle.

“I know. I just wanted to hear your giggle. So, when am I gonna take you out?”

“Hmm, how about never?” you tease.

“Don’t do that to me, sweetheart. Throw me a bone or something.”

“I’m not even going to comment,” you laugh.

You take out the first vial and shove a new one into the case for more blood.

“I’m serious. When are you gonna let me take you out to a nice dinner? I’ll pay.”

“Oh, you will? How generous of you,” you say sarcastically yet playfully.

“Does that mean yes?”

“No.”

“I’m not gonna stop asking you.”

“You’ll turn blue in the face if you continue that.”

“It’s okay,” he shrugs. “I look good in blue.” You roll your eyes and try to hide your smile knowing he sees it. You finish getting four blood samples before patching him up with a Hello Kitty bandaid. You were just treating two twin little girls and this is all you have. “Nice band-aid.”

“It’s all I have. I can get a different one if you want.”

“No, no, I happen to like Hello Kitty.” You trash your gloves and the needle packet before standing. “Come to my concert.”

“I have to work.”

“No, you don’t. It’s on Saturday and you don’t work the weekends.” You silently curse knowing he’s right. “How about this? I will have a VIP and all-access badge with your name on it. Come if you want. It starts at seven. Are we done here?”

“Yeah, but--”

“Give my love to Sabrina.”

He hops of the table and kisses your cheek as he leaves. The two fangirls see him and fawn over his good looks but when he looks back, it’s at you. He only has eyes for you. He winks and turns to the fangirls who are practically tripping over the other to get to him. He signs what they want to be signed and takes pictures with them before leaving.

Today is only Wednesday but you can’t stop thinking about Jensen and his offer the rest of the week. Saturday comes faster than you’d like, and you find yourself driving with Sabrina to the concert hours before it even starts. There are already people lining up to get to the front of the pit but you bypass the entire parking lot to head to the back where the service entrance is.

“I can’t believe I’m going to this,” you say.

“So, when are you and my brother going to fuck?”

“Sabrina!”

“What? If anyone should be with him, it’s you. That boy is in love with you.”

“No, he’s not. He thinks he is because I don’t want him.”

“Does telling yourself that help you sleep at night?”

“Sabrina… He’s a rockstar. He’s a famous rockstar. He doesn’t want some rundown nurse. He could have anyone.”

“Yeah, but he wants you.”

You’re torn because you do want Jensen. He’s every girl’s dream. Even if he wasn’t a rockstar or famous, you’ve known him since you two were kids. You grew up together. You know who the real Jensen is, the one he doesn’t show anyone else. Still, there is that nagging feeling that he'll dump you once he gets bored with you. 

All of your exes did.

You show security both your IDs and he hands you and Sabrina your access badges before directing you where to park. After you two get out, you follow security to the back where the band is hanging out. You’ve gotten to know Jensen’s band a little over the years. They’re nice guys.

“Bean!” Jensen turns and grins when he sees his sister. His drummer has a major crush on your friend and has called her Bean ever since she told him she hated it. They’re in the “will they, won’t they?” stage but everyone knows they’re gonna be endgame. “Where’ve you been?”

“I told you not to call me that,” she rolls her eyes and hugs her brother. 

“And I told you I don’t care. I like how you blush when I do,” he smirks.

Jensen’s gaze goes over to you and he visibly relaxes at the sight of you. He walks over to you and takes off his hat so that his hair falls over his face.

“Hi, Jensen.” He smiles but doesn’t answer you. “What, cat got your tongue? I know I’m breathtaking but come on.”

“He doesn’t speak before a show to preserve his voice. He has breathing exercises to do,” Josh, the drummer, says.

“What a blessing,” you joke.

Jensen pulls you in for a hug, and you allow this minute to really feel him. His arms have always felt so safe around you, and you find yourself relaxing into his body. He pulls away and takes out his phone to text you since he takes his voice exercises seriously. Your phone pings and you look at the message he sent.

I love that you’re here.

You blush under his gaze and try but fail to hide your smile.

“You know I would have come.”

You and Sabrina leave for the VIP tent on the floor while the band gets ready. The opener comes out and does her performance which gives you time to enjoy the music and get some food before Jensen comes on stage. Since you and Sabrina are on Jensen and Josh’s social media, you’re both easily recognizable. Fans come up to the tent to chat and take pictures with you two. You never had a desire for fame but it’s nice to know you’ve made someone’s day just by saying hi to them.

The entire stadium goes dark and the intro to the concert begins. Immediately, the entire crowd cheers for Jensen. He walks on stage in a different outfit than when you saw him earlier, and you have to admit he looks really good. He’s wearing a classic muscle shirt that definitely shows off how much he’s been working out and his tattoos. Gone is his hat so that his hair can flop around freely.

His eyes immediately find the VIP tent, and he smiles when he sees you. You’ve seen his concerts over TikTok Lives and other social media platforms but nothing beats the real thing. He sings each song with passion like he means every word he’s singing. There is a long catwalk where he walks, and all the girls fawn over him whenever he gives them two seconds of his attention.

By the time he’s at the halfway point of his concert, your feet are hurting from how much you’re dancing and your ears are ringing from how loud it is, but you love it. Jensen is in the middle of a song when he suddenly stops and takes out one of his earpieces.

“Wait, wait, wait,” he pants. The band stops playing and everyone quiets down in confusion, including you. He’s never done this at any of his other concerts. “I’ll get back to the music in a second. I just want to say this is a very special concert because there is someone very special here tonight.”

“Oh, my God,” Sabrina gasps.

“Her name is Y/N and she’s right over there in the VIP tent.” The camera pans over to your shocked face so that everyone in the stadium can see. Sabrina can’t stop smiling. “You see, we’ve been friends since we were kids and she doesn’t know this but I am absolutely crazy for her.”

Cheers erupt throughout the stadium, and you shake your head at Jensen with a smile.

“Now, I’ve asked her this many times but she’s always said no to me. I don’t think she’ll be able to say no in a room full of eighty thousand people. Someone get her a microphone. I want to hear her answer.” Jensen waits for someone to bring you a microphone. “Y/N, will you let me take you to a really nice dinner date?”

You wait for the crowd to quiet down a bit before giving your answer.

“No,” you smile sweetly. “You just won’t take no for an answer.”

“You’re right. I won’t.” He drags one of the barstools to the middle of the stage and sits on it. “That’s why we’re not continuing until you say yes.”

“You’re not serious.”

“Oh, I am, sweetheart. I won’t sing another song until you say yes. What do you say, Los Angeles? Should she say yes to me?” Almost every fan in the stadium including Sabrina cheers for you two. “See? Even they think you should.”

“Well if they think we should…”

“Is that a yes?”

“No,” you grin.

“Alright.” Jensen sits and drums his fingers on his legs patiently. “I wonder what I’m going to do next weekend. I think I should take up fishing. My dad always brought me but I never appreciated it before.”

“You’re seriously going to sit there and not continue your concert?” you ask.

“Put everyone out of their misery and just say yes to the date. Come on, everyone. Y/N! Y/N!”

Everyone starts chanting your name, and Sabrina tugs on your arm to grab your attention.

“Has any of your exes done this for you? What are you scared of?”

She’s right. None of your rockstar boyfriends have ever stopped a concert for you. None of them even mentioned you were there. Jensen doesn’t have to say it but he is in love with you and you’re in love with him.

“Fine. Fine. Yes, I’ll go on a date with you.”

“Yes!” Jensen cheers. You hand the microphone back to the stadium worker, and Jensen puts the earpiece back in. “This next song is for you, sweetheart.”

And he plays the song he wrote for you in high school.

x

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[spicyclover]

In a haze

Summary : In the car, there are millions of thoughts that pass one after the other. The brain accumulates and releases at hundredths of a second all the information we need to be good drivers. However, sometimes it happens that the information never comes back and we are lost in this infinite mist.

Request

Hope you’ll enjoy it. Let me know in the comment section.

Thank you! :)

Lots of love, xxx Spicy Clover

WARNING : mention of crash | lose of consciousness

The humidity is at its peak. Singapore is really one of the most physical races. The overwhelming and stifling heat prevents the brain from accumulating air properly. I already regret leaving the refrigerated hospitality to join the garage. I meet some fans on my way and I stop to take some pictures.

I am quickly escorted out of the crowd. I run to join the others to start the parade. I regroup with the two Ferraris and Max who discuss qualifications. I am P8. I could have had more, but a moment of distraction made me lose seconds in a corner. I smile at Charles and shake Carlos’s hand. I'm sweating in my team gear, it's really the worst. The Ferraris boys are not better, Charles is red as a tomato and Carlos look like he's going faint any second.

In the distance, I see Daniel. He is in a corner, his headphones on his ears. He has his face of concentration. He's cute, makes him look more serious. Since the beginning of the year, he hasn’t smiled as much. He’s not the same as before. He gradually realizes that his days are numbered in this sport and it scares him. I understand that feeling. I am the only woman on the grid and at my first mistake, I have a horde of men wanting to replace me with their macho and sexist criticism. Daniel raises his head and crosses my eyes. A smile expands on my lips and he seems to relax.

With the parade over, I return to the garage for the final preparations. I visualize the race in my head. I review the turns, the areas of acceleration, the areas of deceleration. I calculate the pressure of my tires and I look at the temperature one last time during the race. Filling my brain with all this information helps me not to be overwhelmed by pressure. I relativize and focus on the fact by what can happen.

It’s already time to get in the car. As always, the pressure goes up and I feel like my head is going to explode. I get in the car. I put my helmet on. When the helmet goes on my head, I no longer calculate what’s around me. Everything around me gets foggy and only my car counts. I hear my engineer in my ear and listen to the instructions.

The journalists and the teams leave the track. The crowd is on fire. I allow myself to look around. Oscar is on my right at P7. Lando is P6 ahead of me. Behind me is Daniel P10. The light turns red and the formation round begins. Max starts the pace. I warm up my tires and check my brakes one last time. I barely have time to think that the finish line is in front of me again. I install the single-seater in my starting lines and I prepare myself.

One. My pulse begin to quicken. Two. I'll move faster and faster, the fan roaring beside me. Three. My thoughts begin to wash away in a cloud of wind and dust. Four. The crowd thunders. Five.

My hands release the brake and I press the accelerator. The first corner comes quickly. I find my line among all the cars and I concentrate. The first few cars slow down and I’m right behind. I start turning the wheel. The next few seconds freeze in time. My brain tries to interpret what is happening before my eyes, but I can’t. I feel the back of my car rising in the air. In a straight perpendicular line, all I see is black and white asphalt. I let go of the steering wheel and the barrels start. My body is wandered from left to right in the car and I try to maintain myself. All this happens in seconds before I crash into the security fence.

I hear his laugh. I look up and he is in front of me, his smile bigger than the sun. I chuckle before I tongue him. I get up and start running to the ocean. He rushes after me. I peek behind me and he’s already behind.

"It’s not fair," I said, with a sulky pout. "You’re faster than me." He grabs my face in his gigantic hands and kisses me. I try to resist, but these kisses are magical that I can’t keep acting. I surrender to these lips.

"I am a high performance athlete, athletes speed." I laugh and I push him away a little. He loses balance and leads me to his fall. The fine sand is quickly encountered and my eyes get lost in his. I remove some rebellious streaks from his face. He meddles his fingers between my hair and he passes them behind my ears. "You’re beautiful." I pouffe before I kiss his lips again to silence him.

I’m back in the car. I fainted. Oh no, I lost consciousness. My vision is blurry and my ears are ringing. I try to straighten my head to look around, but I can’t. I feel like my heart is in my brain. It’s pounding and I can barely breathe. I feel a hand on my shoulder, but I can’t react. Gradually my vision darkened again.

"I don’t want us to hide anymore," whispers Daniel.

The night is cool and we’re in our hotel room in Los Angeles. This is the first time that we meet after weeks of meeting at the bend of an evening or a race. We have been living in this secret relationship for a few months now and I must admit that it is happiness. I like to find it even for a few moments, but it is true that with each separation, they become harder. I smile as I relax my head.

"We have no choice." I say, slowly fading away in my sleep.

And it’s true, we are stuck in this spiral of PR. Being the only woman on the track, I have to be attractive to the male fans. A girl in a relationship is not interesting. I hate every day since this phrase came out of my manager’s mouth. What do I give a shit about male fans? I’m not there for them, or thanks to them. I long to make a big finger in all this, but the more I think about the consequence and the more it scares me.

I am transported out of my car, I distinguish the lights of paramedics who check the dilation of my pupils. I blink and red and white flashes pass in front of my eyes. The ambulance. My helmet was removed. I don’t remember much. They talk to me, but I can’t tell the words. Everything is confusing. Yet, this hand I know. It’s his. Daniel. My eyes are frantically searching around me and I finally see him. He too has crashed. I don’t have time to think more than the paramedic pulls it out of my hand and takes me in the ambulance to the nearest hospital.

The hours that follow are a perpetual blur. I get lost in the dozens of exams and questions I am asked. I answer as best I can, but I get tired and I ask him to be beside me. I whisper his name between my lips. Many hours have passed. My senses come back little by little and I hear again the noises that surround me. I hear the beep of the machines, I hear the nurses who pass by the door of my room. I hear the television on, but I can’t understand the words. Most importantly, I hear his voice. He’s there with me. I painfully open my eyes. In the first place, everything is blurred. I can only see the light, but very quickly my vision clears and I can look at his face.

"I am so sorry, my love. I am terribly sorry." He whispers repeatedly, my hand in his.

"Hey, stranger." I say in a hoarse voice. I feel like I’ve been smoking for forty years with that voice.

"Y/n!" He cries while looking up. "You are awake."

"You didn’t think you’d get rid of me like that." I said with a laugh. I try to move to get up, but my body hurts. I moan and Daniel looks at me worried. "What happened?"

"We crashed into each other… I ran into you by accident. The car behind me didn’t brake and I was right in your corner. You rolled, I thought I’d lose you." He chokes a sob before he takes over." You landed in the safety gate and the race was paused for a long time. I… I couldn’t… I couldn’t go on without knowing if you were okay." He caresses my hair tenderly. I feel the pain in his voice and it hurts me.

"You disqualified yourself for me?"

"For you? Always." I smile and reach for him. I grab the top of his neck and our lips meet. Our kiss lasts a few minutes. We enjoy the present moment and the presence of the other. "Just to let you know, but I may have told everyone about our relationship and the media is crazy about it."

"What?" I write to myself as I step aside. What did he do? He didn’t… Oh no!

"We’ll talk later." He kisses me again with a smile. "You need to rest and heal."

"Dan…" I try to argue, but he won’t let me continue.

[miyoii]

BE WITH ME 𖥔 bada lee x fem!reader (s.her) previous

genre: angst | summary — the last thing ; word count: 604

a/n: and here is the next part! sorry if it took so fucking long 😓 school has been a bitch. anyway enjoy!

the tense atmosphere in the house hasn’t left even if the heated argument has been finished few hours ago.

bada laid on their bed, filled with thoughts that kept her up the whole night, not even getting an ounce of sleep in her system.

she doesn’t even know if she could finish today’s filming without passing out, yet is still her job so she doesn’t have a choice but to attend the shooting for swf..the only problem is—bada’s going to see her there.

bada sat in the front row, heart beating faster than ever. she couldn’t hear what was happening around her, she was looking at the top of the stairs, getting nervous by the second.

tatter noticed how out of it their leader was making her worried, “bada, you okay? you look tense.” she whispered to her, not wanting the others to hear.

“yeah i’m good..” she said softly, yet her face says it all. team bebe were silent as they waited for the other teams to be complete. bada looked at her fingers, where their promise ring was placed as her mind goes elsewhere.

as her thoughts starts pilling in, footsteps were heard coming down the stairs next to them. looking up, bada saw the woman who she was desperately wanting to run after.

yn clinged onto kirsten’s arm, her thick black eye glasses shining from the light. “you doin’ fine girl?” kirsten asked as she saw bada looking at them from the corner of her eye, “mhmm.” yn hummed as she felt eyes on her.

bada continued to look at jam republic as they sat on their section beside them. she noticed the way yn sat in the far right away from her, making her sigh.

the shoot goes on, the tense atmosphere coming from the competitiveness of each group didn’t sit well with bada especially seeing yn has been silent and secluded for the whole time they were there.

the only reaction she has seen from her was when yn smiled at her team mates when they were called out for a challenge, that was it.

even bada hasn’t said a word, which wasn’t really surprising, yet the rest of team bebe sat down in silence as well. every team could feel the tense atmosphere coming from them, even jam republic.

“i feel like i’m going to puke.” emma whispered to latrice, “like—what’s up with the atmosphere, its more tense than usual.” the sub-leader replied back. “well, i have a feeling that i know why..” kirsten said to the two, as her eyes went from yn to bada.

“okay everyone! let’s take a quick break, be back at 12pm sharp!”

as everyone starts to stand up and stretch, bada heads over to jam republic. making eye contact with the team before grabbing one of their youngest members’ hand and dragging her towards the hallway.

as they reach bebe’s room, the jam republic member pulled her hand away from bada’s. “what the hell are you doing?” yn asked furiously as she stared at bada. “we need to talk yn.”

“talk about what? how you went behind my back? how you fucking compared me to that lying son of a bitch?” she asked, eyes becoming glassy.

bada took a deep breath, she didn’t know what to do. for the past 2 years, this was the only moment she couldn’t think of anything to resolve her mistake.

seeing her staying silent, yn took it as a sign to go. as she turned around to leave, the words coming out of bada’s mouth torn them both apart.

“i don’t think we should continue..us anymore.”

[obscuremantisman]

Maaaan, i love writing about silly eldritch creatures. ALSO, WE'RE ALMOST HITTING 30 EPIC FOLLOWERS EVEN THOUGHT I'VE BEEN AS ACTIVE AS A ROCK?!?! YIPPEE!!!

this is following both ending J and ending L.

⪧ I appreciate criticism, ideas, and your opinions. ⪦

As you finished wrapping up your target's body, you threw it inside the trunk, closing it without much care, and walking back to the front.

A heavy sigh left you as you plopped down on the seat. Your back was killing you. That's what you get from carrying heavy weight for too long. You glance up, staring at the roof empty-minded for a few seconds before today's events replay in your head.

You fucked up, you had been working nonstop, and countless hours were spent on a mission that was supposed to end midday, all because you had made a tiny mistake. The little mistake that simply provoked a chain of unpredictable events, being almost the death of you in several moments.

"Aaargh... I should've been more careful, next time I might actually not make it." You scolded yourself, stretching your arms with a frown plastered on your face. This mission was simply a disappointment, one of your worst performances this year. You could've done so, so much better, and that fact bothered you.

You wiped off some sweat from your face, glancing down at the empty seat beside you in thought, your eyes widening as realization hit you like a truck. "Aaarrgh! I'm such a fucking moron! Out of all things, I just had to forget about this!!!" The words came out of your mouth before you could even think, grabbing a fist of your hair.

Were you really coming back home with empty hands? again? You're supposed to already have new books from the local library inside your car. You panicked, looking around for any kind of magical solution.

You could try reaching the place right now... but you were so far away from it at the moment that you'd never get to the damned library in time if you wanted to keep a low profile, which was necessary to keep you out of the police sight.

You bit the inside of your cheek, staring at the front mirror, finger tapping at the wheel. Was it worth it? No matter what plan you elaborated, too much risk was in sight. You were hesitant, of course, rethinking all choices available while guilt crept to your mind, an image of Hector coming to mind. The lad being the sole reason you'd bring home so many books. A smile crept onto your face as you recall Hector's expression when you told him he could read any of the books you had around, his happy hums replaying in your mind.

He had become a massive bookworm once you introduced him to the world of literature, and you felt absolutely no guilt in admitting that you couldn't resist spoiling him rotten, trips to the library turning into a habit.

You sighed, hands clutching the wheel, any thought of coming home with nothing being discarded as you turned the car on, your foot going down on the accelerator with force. "I need those damn books!!!"

When you finally stopped the engine at a safe place, you immediately ran to the building, almost falling face to the floor when throwing yourself at the library's door. It attracted a few stares, but you couldn't care less about the embarrassment passed, although stiffly walking for Hector's preferred book section, hiding your face from view.

You looked like a mess. You had, quite literally, gotten the books just by the last minute, and life was practically drained from your complexion. You had been resting on a wall for a few minutes, recovering your forces when the lights of an open store across the road caught your attention. You tried your luck with it, having a bit of money spent on delicious treats for the night. Now with two grocery bags in arms, and lips dry as chopsticks, you walked back to your car, resting your face on the wheel. You waited silently for nothing to occur for a few seconds, fisting the air in victory, plastic bags being put just on the seat beside you. "Mhm, let's see, three books, a bag of caramels, aaand a chocolate cake." You grinned, glancing at the street a few times before putting your car to work again.

You felt happy to see your house, taking the bags as excitedly as you could and sneaking to the back of the car, using the key in your other hand to open the trunk.

Taking out the body from inside the trunk was the easy part, you've come to have a facility in weight lifting due to how you did your job. The hard part was the back pain achieved later, which right now was killing you.

"And up you go." You threw it over your shoulder, closing the trunk with a slap, the bags in your arms swinging around as you walked.

You open the door, greeted by the smell of waffles in the air. Hector must be enjoying the waffle maker you brought last month, you thought to yourself.

You had a glance around, closing the door behind with one foot. "Hectoor! I'm home!" You called out, the lack of answer not bothering you as you walked further in.

You eyed the walls as fleshy tendrils with teeth came into view, something you grew accustomed to seeing within the years of living with Hector. They slid closer to you without much stealth, the largest one coming ahead to reveal an eye, black sclera, and shiny green iris.

"Hi there." You greeted it, reaching a hand to pet the tendril, a hum leaving you as it slid past your fingers to around your arm, its pupil expanding as it stared straight into you.

It had a firm yet wet, squishy composition, rather satisfying with your gloves on, which had you spend a good few minutes squeezing it around, not that Hector minded, letting you do as you please.

You were brought back to reality once your sore muscles hurt yet again, making you groan, letting go of the tendril and continuing in your way.

You took a turn towards the kitchen, poking your head in to have a look inside, only to be taken by surprise as you came face to face with Hector, who was not only savoring a waffle but also waiting for you, a gurgling laugh leaving him at your reaction.

You sighed, putting your hand on your heart as you calmed down. You swear Hector is gonna end up giving you a heart attack one of these days. "A sneaky bastard as always, I see." You only received a little hum in response before his interest was peaked at your things.

You looked behind yourself at the wrapped body, to the bags, and then at him. He was staring at you for permission, digesting the remains of his waffle more quickly.

"Did you do any bad?" You questioned playfully with a lifted eyebrow, and he shook his head frankly, giving you the best puppy eyes he could manage, already approaching. You chuckled, signaling with your head for him to proceed.

You watched as he crawled towards the body eagerly, being quick to take it with his fleshy limbs and pull it towards the living room, where most of his form rests.

You popped your shoulders and didn't dare to keep looking once Hector tore apart the plastic. The gruesome sight would've spoiled the sweets for you. "I brought more books. Surely you finished the ones I last gave you, right?" You asked, leaving the groceries at the table while listening to the supposedly happy gurgling with a smile.

You went looking for water in the fridge, finishing the drink with a relieved sigh, your throat thanking you very much. Putting the empty cup away, you take off your coat, throwing it to a chair only to stretch out yourself after, your back giving off a satisfying pop.

You glanced at one of Hector's eyes in the wall, which had been watching you in interest all this time. "Oh, yeah, try not to make much of a mess, okay?" You spoke out loud. "Because I can't keep stealing new carpets." You frowned, and thought of the last three carpets you got, all gone now, reduced to dust to erase evidence.

You pouted for a moment. They all looked so nice but the blood was hell to get off. It certainly pained you to see them go.. despite not spending much time around the living room due to your busy life.

"If you save our new carpet from getting dirty, I might get you...." You spoke slowly, a chuckle leaving you as tendrils slid closer from the side of your view in anticipation of your words. "An extra piece of cake!!!" You revealed the cake inside one of the plastic bags with a ta-da, hand hovering around it dramatically.

All eyes you could see had extended pupils, almost like a cat, a sequence of excited hums following action as they tried reaching for the sweet while you moved it away just in time. "Oh! Hey— come on now—!" You laughed, holding the cake the best you could away from Hector as his limbs latched onto your arms.

"Hey, hey, the first piece is mine. Don't even try." You shooed Hector away, placing the cake on the table while eyeing the creature suspiciously. It looked delicious, really, the Chantilly glistening in the light. You took off your gloves and the cover, sweeping off some topping with a finger, savoring the taste with a hum of delight, acting oblivious to the light push received from Hector, who was anxious to have a taste, too.

You poked the closest of Hector's tendrils before walking to the sink, washing your hands before anything. Behind you, squelches could be heard, and you deducted a little someone was trying to get a sneaky bite, if not already. You simply rolled your eyes, turning back, only to be met with Hector, who had already returned from the living room, his mass seated awkwardly in a chair and a knife already in his hands, an excited glint in his eyes as he waited for you.

"How helpful..." You mumbled out with amusement, drying your hands with a cloth and taking two plates for each before coming to divide the cake, taking the knife away from Hector.

He couldn't resist, coming closer and staring at the treat with pure interest. By the time you finished cutting, Hector was practically ready to pounce, shifting around agitatedly, and quickly taking his plate once you offered it.

He desperately needed a bath, drool dripping from whichever mouth was in your view, the blood covering his body definitely making you concerned about the state of the living room. As he was in no rush to savor his piece, you went to get a brief inspection of the room he was last in, quickly sighing in relief when there was no blood in sight except on Hector's body. He was on point like always. It almost made you excuse him from looking like a rabid animal at the moment.

You returned to the kitchen, taking your piece and inviting Hector to spend the rest of the day with you, taking the briefly forgotten caramels you brought in hand and throwing it to him as a gift. It was safe to say you both enjoyed the lunch.

Pillows were on the couch to help with your back pain as you cocooned your body with a blanket, an empty plate resting by the couch arm. Hector was back to his favored wall, entranced in reading the books you bought while savoring the sweets he had.

An entertaining movie played on TV, quiet so as not to disturb your company. A comfortable silence settled between you both. That is how what was left of the night was spent.

I took too long to post this. Also, did you like the banner? I didn't find a cool pic for it so i made one.

••● anyways, you can download and play the epic game here ●••

[bladekindeyewear]

HS^2 bloggin’ mainline 2024-09-29

(Previous post - current page 666)

Section 6 is finally here! (And the part at the bottom is gone, possibly never meant to be clickable?!) Time for possibly the last or second-to-last portion of one of my favorite Homestuck storytelling sections so far, let's see if and how this situation ends!

Time to see if it really HAS been a whole eight years before she finishes her therapy like the joke Davepeta left on last time, or if it'll add up to 6 for the whole thing to go with the Hell/purgatory/666 theme, I suppose! *click*

"LATER"

Well, I suppose it isn't going to tell us HOW LONG just yet...

Ooh Davepeta's theme again, it sounds a bit jazzier than usual if I'm not imagining it, like a slight remix!

Gosh she looks so proud and happy! (Even though the next line could easily pull the rug out from under us.) I can't wait to see grown-up Vriska having almost-sort-of resolved her biggest issues! (No change in her sprite when I compare to my earlier screenshots, although that doesn't tell us much about how much time has passed since there was always a good chance she had grown as much as she's going to physically the prior new sprite switchup.)

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < its b33n a long ass time but were cr33ping up behind the grand finale DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < that finale is never gonna s33 it coming

:D

VRISKA: The final 8oss.

Ooh, who is it? I mean, probably herself obviously. But who else could it be? There are possibilities I'm sure but they're not coming to mind easily. I'm reminded very much, the way I have been this entire time, of the conversation in original Homestuck where the retcon-returned Vriska berated her possibly-inverted ghost self, insulting her and shouting her down in a way that was wrong and proved all the ways the version of her who HADN'T survived had grown and the one who HAD survived hadn't. She insisted that being the hero and hiding her self-hatred to go have an Epic Final Story Battle with Lord English was the only way forward for her while everyone else was escaping the bounds of canon to enjoy a life and hopefully true happiness outside the story's confines, and what she'd gone up to before The Plot Point was her reward, consigned to irrelevance again and now WITHIN the Plot Point shown that none of what she'd been pursuing up until now would have ever made her happy, or into a better person. Now she has to finish learning that lesson, or at least get close enough, of what to actually do and what true freedom ("Ultimate Freedom") and happiness is to finally do what's right for her and potentially everyone around her.

I guess that means I expect her to have to "fight" herself, because she's been the enemy this whole time, right? Everyone she's "reconciled" with has been, in effect, the reflection of those people that exists within HER Heart, much like Jake was able to invoke Brain Ghost Dirk. Lines in here in previous sections indicated that she really is "alone", that these people she's talking to are an illusion and really besides her tagalong therapists she's the "only one here", the only one keeping herself here and torturing herself. Because SHE'S always been the one torturing herself, and SHE needs to learn how and when and why NOT TO in order to be the best version of herself. The Jung in Homestuck shows itself again in the form of the shadow, in the lesson of merging to ascend, of accepting yourself and your flaws with a humility that doesn't deny your ability to affect the world around you, to understand how to leave your mark on reality and how you're WORTH doing so, without stamping down the wills of others.

I'm rambling and stalling, let's see what they have for us.

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < master hand, your days are fucking numbered

I know this is just a smash reference, but does Vriska think she needs to go at Doc Scratch again? His chess playing with her on the board is sort of some "master hand" shit, I'd think.

VRISKA: More like minutes!

A clock hand joke perhaps?

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < finally ready to take that final step

whatisitwhatisitwhatisit :D

VRISKA: I needed a 8reather!

Huh. I didn't think that maybe she had been just, not going back in AT ALL after the Doc Scratch thing and maybe just, resting for a LONG time that's about to be divulged after the first try, or perhaps multiple tries?

Oh wait is that a Breath aspect and freedom pun hint too? You can't always buckle down and go at your responsibilities (Blood) all the time or you'll snap like a rusty chain.

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < you sure did!

I know I'm stopping like, every line, but... I'm sensing a punchline coming of THE BREATHER'S BEEN X YEARS.

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < *a tear begins to well up in dps eye behind their shades* DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < *they f33l like a mom s33ing their freshly pupated charge about to finish their final trials and march off to the subgrubs or maybe a dope ass cave* DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < *dp wonders will they be safe out there? will she make use of all the lessons theyve learned here?*

Dave and Nepeta as a fusion is never not fun and interesting to listen to.

I don't expect The Plot Point to have "fully cured her" so to speak because not even comprehensive therapy is the full answer to solving your issues, and because we still have a good amount of plot LEFT besides all the attention Vriska is sucking up here of it. But if she leaves The Plot Point having identified her issues, confronted them, and with a true resolution to accept herself AND her flaws and do better out there in the real or quasi-real world, with a bit more of an understanding of how to ACTUALLY strive to be the best version of herself (the answer to the ultimate riddle) and begin honestly trying without much leftover regret, then yeah. That may be all she needs from here. We'll see.

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < *will she remember to wipe the lid?*

O-of what? The toilet? Huh? >_>"

(Is this a stealthy reference to Vriska being a trans gal in side content as per Toblerone and urinating standing up...?)

FEFETASPRITE: 3833 < 383

WAIT WHAT? Was she always here?!? Did I forget a comment about her showing up before? Is she real?? She's a sprite who DIED, isn't she, which would mean that since this isn't a reflection of Vriska's, sprites still HAVE ghosts that went to the Furthest Ring and could be sucked down here?! This is a heck of a random sprites-having-ghosts confirmation!

...I could have sworn that the joke of Fefeta being so talkative but never doing so onscreen was repeated SOMEWHERE in HS^2 since Beyond Canon and my liveblog of it resumed, but I can't freakin' remember where. I think I was just coincidentally talking with a friend about Fefeta's explosion recently on a random subject matter and I'm confusing it with having read/heard SOME mention of her again in the comic. Like from Roxy or something. Roxy might have brought up her past with Fefeta to remind us she existed so she could be dropped again on us in here, or... fuck I'm confused. Someone let me know if we had any clue Fefeta was here or mention of her elsewhere in Beyond Canon, or if her living again had been confirmed elsewhere before this, because my memory could NOT be failing me harder right now.

VRISKA: *The Thief proudly puffs out her chest with her hands on her hips and her 8ack to the sun, looking heroic and 8adass.*

--Okay I know that Vriska HAS roleplayed before, or we've been told enough that she has, but doing so ONSCREEN so shamelessly with Davepeta speaks of a really really strong friendship she'd have to be pretty vulnerable with them to do this, I think. Which is adorable.

Also, her back to the sun, huh? Nah, no need to dig into that.

VRISKA: Ha! You've got nothing to fear. VRISKA: I'm older and wiser now.

And the time it's taken punchline is coming aaany second now...

VRISKA: I want to thank you, too.

AWW! Gosh she's improved SO MUCH to be talking so freely vulnerably; the last time she approached this sort of opening-up was the moirallegiance with Terezi that was always too one-sided because she never intended to listen to her moirail's advice, back in the last stretch of original Homestuck.

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < what for DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < i barely did shit

HAH! Don't be modest, you kept her (relatively) sane this whole time! Davepeta looks genuinely confused, that's hilarious.

VRISKA: Haha yeah, 8ut I'm glad you were here anyway. VRISKA: You and everyone else! FEFETASPRITE: 3833 < 383

EXACTLY. You all spent X years with her in here just to keep her company!!! That's not nothing, that's a whole fucking ton of something! Even if I get the feeling that The Plot Point was partially a sink of sorts to suck up all the ghosts from the Ghost Rain and keep them from mucking up the place.

But no seriously, was Fefeta here before??? Did I genuinely forget she was? Because I'm finding it hard to believe I hadn't noticed her and the implications a formerly exploded sprite surviving here would have had before.

VRISKA: ........

Yeah I'm apparently with you there. XD Is she running into the same confusion as me? (Or is the fact that there are sort of two half-Nepetas here about to invite a conversation about Heart and the Ultimate Self again?)

VRISKA: So, DP, you're half Nepeta, right?

Oh, it is!!! :D (And Fefeta's just a sprite, or a ghost of one, not a sprite squared and thus automatic Ultimate Self of both Dave AND Nepeta.) We're about to get some Heart aspect to help stick in Vriska's mind to break down the ultimate answers for her and the audience I bet.

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < yeah VRISKA: Well, more of a whole Nepeta, along with a whole other dude. DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < ... yeah? FEFETASPRITE: 3833 < 383 VRISKA: 8ut Fefeta's also a whole Nepeta!

It feels like Vriska shouldn't be too confused on this, unless she's gotten lucky and subconsciously sensed that there's an answer she needs for herself, here.

FEFETASPRITE: 3833 < ...

Just don't explode on us again :p

VRISKA: So like... how does that work?

Vriska, you've met who knows how many alternate copies of literally everyone, right?

Nooooo don't make her Fefetasplode again!

VRISKA: Why are there two Nepetas?

A MEOW SOUND EFFECT AND THEN SHE FADES INTO NOTHING. Dammit!!!

I mean, solid joke, sure, except on the Fefeta lovers, but. Is this a consequence of Davepeta being an Ultimate Nepeta and sucking up any spare nonliving Nepeta air in the room passively when it's pointed out? All of HS^2, plus the Epilogues, had a theme in part of Dirk concentrating his power as an Ultimate Self by taking parts of himself back in from places like Candy where it wasn't convenient to exist to achieve his ultimate (hah) goal, which it was IMPLIED made him more powerful-- and we just saw alt!Calliope lose power when she divided herself and have to spend time meditating to reunite enough of herself to control any sort of Jade body again. (Which again, makes her super vulnerable to being disrupted by a Prince of Heart, by the way, which I have no clue how she can be so arrogant as to dismiss and think she can do this with just her squad.)

(Did I mention that there's a TINY chance that Ultimate Davebot's chosen purpose, in alt!Callie's quest to tie up all the loose ends and bring the plot back together, might be to have him scratch Caliborn's session so that alt!Calliope could properly exist? You know, my old debunked-and-defunct Third Scratch theory, the three scratches on Gamzee's face? Oh shit that post has old broken image links I need to fix too, I'll do that by tonight. It's only a small chance, though. EDIT 20240930: After sleeping on it, it seems even less likely than I thought, actually. Alt!Calliope's ship with Davebot and Aradia on it is headed for Dirk and Rose's new planet-- for Davebot to pull off what I just proposed, he'd normally need to use time travel on Earth C to leap to the distant near-death of its star when the cherubs lived and get an easy route into Caliborn's session. I can't say it 100% rules it out, especially if Davebot might (or might not) be able to rewind his entire ship journey when he's done with it to make a full Spacetime move instead of just Time; and that's given that when they entered the Meat timeline they even started at the Meat version of Earth C anyway, too, which is only really an assumption. But it doesn't seem to add up to alt!Callie's need for Davebot in the confrontation itself, at least.)

Okay back to poor, sweet Fefeta just having vanished under the slightest bit of scrutiny.

VRISKA: ... What the fuck was that? DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < you just fucking sent dear sw33t precious fefeta to sprite city.

Is that a literal Sprite City like the kingdoms founded on Earth C where Jasprose was hanging out, or a figurative Sprite City as in sprites tend to die?

Does an Ultimate Nepeta's presence here mean that unless avoiding scrutiny (Voidily) they all become part of the present Ultimate Nepeta and can't exist in this space at the same time? Also with the Umineko connection pointed out last time as something this whole sequence is apparently referencing, I know from my partial experience from the series that there's precedent for someone unable to exist and falling apart if their true paradoxical origins are revealed.

VRISKA: ???????? DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < hahahaha anyway

NO NOT ANYWAY, EXPLAIN

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < i was just fucking around earlier but honestly, im actually gonna miss you

Yeah, much like her ghost self from the pre-retcon timeline, this Vriska was likely a lot more gratifying to hang out with. (NO EXPLANATION AT ALL FOR FEFETAFADEOUT, GREAT)

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < i think im f33ling a goodbye glomp coming on

Yeah, they would. (Sorry for quoting and commenting on basically every irrelevant line it's become ingrained habit already and we've only been back here a few times aaaa)

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < oh yeah sorry

This is too fun a reaction for me not to screenshot, though. Yeah, personal space, Davepeta! Consent of contact!

Ohhhkay I think this is my sign that if I don't stop screencapping and retyping every single line of dialogue I'm never going to get through this final section. Time for more selective quoting and paraphrasing of action!!! (I promise! Kinda!)

VRISKA: Alright fine, one hug 8efore I crush this and I'm outta here.

Daww. :D

I wonder where everyone here is going to go... I don't think Davepeta is going to voluntarily stop existing, but they're pretty hard to pin down.

Yaaaay! :D :D :D

Davepeta you are by NO means allowed to stop existing once the Plot Point is resolved by the way. You can be as plot irrelevant as you want, just don't stop existing.

Oh shit, it's somewhat literal.

One of the eight-balls she compulsively broke, "increasing her bad luck" and leaving things to step on earlier that Kanaya pointed out she could have found her perceived luck returning just by cleaning up. The metaphor that she's been the one putting HERSELF through hell for much of her life, especially ever since she escaped her parent.

VRISKA: I've 8een waiting for this one.

You know who it is?! Is it you?

VRISKA: I have a pretty good feeling I know who's waiting on the other side.

Oh come on, I didn't break the habit of retyping every single line of dialogue at all!!! She's just guessing. Which raises the chance significantly that this might instead be Terezi she has to confront, within herself, to help bring this full circle and decide what she has to do. Everything about their arcs seems to be leading the two of them together again, and not just in their ghost versions, I feel like.

It's just as possible though that when we finally see the message Vriska left Terezi at the end of the epilogues, though, still unseen, that that represents the final word between the Scourge Sisters and these versions of themselves are meant to find their own paths, even though Terezi spent all those years searching the wreckage of the Furthest Ring for her. I can't say for sure.

Okay I'm going to start paraphrasing... pff, Davepeta lampshading the Silent Hill mind prison -ness of this, yeah plenty of works have had this sort of trope and that's certainly a good one (so much as I've heard/read of it anyway).

The quite possibly final goodbye from Vriska to Davepeta! Hope "see you around" remains literal and Davepeta doesn't go to Sprite City </euphemism>.

Wishing her luck!

Black screen, Vriska waits...

A tree fading in in the distance... multiple colors of tree... this feels like Terezi.

VRISKA: Hey!!!!!!!!

VRISKA: Is that you?

Ohh fuuuck the touching slow piano music is kicking in. D':

It's time for emotions

VRISKA: I knew it would 8e you!

I can't tell from here if it's her or if it's Ghost (Vriska) but... oh wait. Wait if all the ghosts are here. Could she be confronting, possibly... ACTUAL ghost Vriska with the actual ghost Terezi that reunited with her? That would be a knife-twist she'd learn a lesson from. Clicking further...

VRISKA: You were the one thing missing from this!

D': What a thing to say.

VRISKA: Even if you're just a phantom designed explicitly to torture me, I'mso happy to see-

It's not her like you wanted, is it? And you're the one who picked a path that you thought would lead yourself away from her forever. YOU kicked her away for the sake of your own glory. So maybe it wouldn't be as simple as just seeing her again here and making amends, hm? Let's see.

VRISKA: you...?

Oh this is totally DEFINITELY the ghost (Vriska) that she chewed out in ways that everything she just spent time in The Plot Point showed were completely wrong. The time she REJECTED her inverse shadow self instead of ACCEPTING and merging with all the parts of herself she hated most, showing how and why she was on the path to fighting Lord English and abandoning Terezi instead of finding any sort of true happiness for herself. Let me find the part in Homestuck AND where I talked about it, to link y'all... GOSH without the full text of Homestuck on command-F/control-F it's so much harder to find stuff like "(VRISKA)"...

Yep, "VRISKA" first showed up to see ghost "(VRISKA)" when I wrote this upd8 reaction in June 2015, then went on for the bulk of the conversation over here on my blog, and here in the comic. I explained how she was dressed like a Page, representing her shadow self, her inner Page of Void-- and still on a happier path than the main Vriska who gave HERSELF such an unjustified verbal beatdown for seeming "pathetic". If you want more from back then, look at my posts tagged Vriska from late June 2015.

It completely fits that Vriska would find the disappointment of not having Terezi here, AND simultaneously have to confront herself in this form as the so-called final boss.

Heck... I figured this hell was driven by Vriska's Heart, her ultimate existence across all timelines, but what if (VRISKA) has been having some specific hand in showing the other Vriska how she can finally be happy, like she figured out?

(Anyway that search took like an hour, I'm finally clicking forward now.)

Oh the way the music just STOPS when (Vriska) turns to the camera. THAT'S a sure sign Vriska isn't taking this well. But she's going to be able to figure this one out without any return trips, this time, I'm sure of it. *click*

Oh, THIS music is different from what I expected. Interesting. It's too slow for my mind to figure out if it's a play on Vriska's old walkaround theme.

GOSH SHE'S SO FREAKIN' TINY D':

Clicking... they stare back and forth a bit more...

Aww, Vriska's awkwardly holding her arm. (I'll resist the urge to screenshot absolutely everything.) She may really be catching onto the fact that she has to apologize to herself. Learn from herself-- from ALL of herself. The parts of herself she used to loathe most because she saw her own weakness in them. That's her Jungian Shadow.

And... perhaps it's also in part why we were reminded again of an Ultimate Self's being all of someone just before she dove in.

VRISKA: Alright, fine. VRISKA: Makes sense I'd have to do this eventually.

Yeah, you're smart enough to get it a bit already.

VRISKA: I'm sorry. VRISKA: For all that shit I said to- did to you.

No-- I mean, sure, that's a start, Vriska, but you don't just have to APOLOGIZE to yourself, your shadow, your perceived flaws. You have to ACCEPT yourself. That's more than a quick apology can do.

VRISKA: It was wrong of me to hate you for getting soft. VRISKA: For knowing when to quit.

Holy shit. SHE FUCKING GETS IT. WOW HAS SHE COME SO FAR. This is exactly what we've been saying since nearly a DECADE ago when that argument happened, just like what I said from my upd8 reaction back then to above!

And (Vriska) gives her back an expansive, pained shrug, huh?

VRISKA: HUH???????? What the hell...

Or... wait. No, she couldn't be. That wasn't a shrug was it. Was (Vriska) offering... a HUG?

That's the answer, isn't it? And why we got a Davepeta hug too? That on the inside, when you finally reach a hand out and offer to accept your shadow as an essential-but-not-predominant part of yourself... your shadow is willing to reach back. She was willing to accept Vriska all along if Vriska just tried. But the fear of one's flaws is a horribly hard thing to conquer, to love yourself-- your ENTIRE self-- enough to take that crucial step.

--yeah, that's an offer to hug it out, isn't it? Vriska probably needs a bit to accept that it's really THAT EASY. Because it wasn't. It wasn't easy. Vriska needed to spend ALL those years to really understand enough to do something like this.

And I'm heavily betting that when Vriska and (Vriska) hug, there's a good chance THEY'LL MERGE. Embracing and assimilating the Jungian Shadow, just like the ascent to God-Tier and merging with the dreamself, except this is part of how you become, in a sense-- at least closer to-- your Ultimate Self. Jung-- "while "no one should deny the danger of the descent [...] every descent is followed by an ascent", and assimilation of – rather than possession by – the shadow becomes a possibility." "NANNASPRITE: All the gates do, John. To ascend, each time you must first descend!" Jung-- "We begin to travel [up] through the healing spirals...straight up." Right from the spirograph gates above their houses to their dreamselves and merging to God-Tier, Sburb and Homestuck has been loaded with intentional Jungian psychology references, and this is just the latest instance of the story spelling it out for us.

Anyway, clicking forward. Yeah, Vriska's nervous. She isn't huggy, and this is one of the hardest embraces one can possibly make, whether she realizes it now or not given all the work she's done to get here.

VRISKA: You're asking for too much. VRISKA: You're really going to make me do this? VRISKA: ...

See? It's no wonder this is so hard for her. She was always in the way of herself.

What will you do?

HAH!

Clicking... she hesitates further, of course...

VRISKA: I...

You're so damn close. But that's the reason this is the final 8oss, isn't it? Accepting the shadow is the hardest step. Accepting that she deserves it, that she can deserve to forgive even herself for hurting herself.

VRISKA: I can't.

You can!

And... OH WOW SHE ACTUALLY OLLIES OUTIE?!?!?!??!?!?

It really IS that hard for her to accept herself. I've long covered exactly why it can be the hardest thing of all. Not inverting, but integrating, balancing, accepting ALL of yourself, the good and the bad, your right to make a difference and the importance of recognizing where you may do wrong. Everything Doc Scratch lectured her to fear about herself in part 5.

So she's back at the beach. Clicking...

And that's the end of the upd8. That was... excellent. I loved it.

Seems like we need to wait one more step for her to finally embrace herself. But that's all that's left! Just one more step.

See you next time!

[furret-yumeposting]

I need to start actually posting my imagines/yume pov insert things here soooo imagine this:

Imagine you’re with Avery, walking along the rain soaked streets of Wyndon. It was a gloomy day and like always, the sky was a cloudy grey. The two of you walked the streets hand in hand, passing by expensive boutiques and the odd pub. Despite the city being Galar’s hub for… well, everything really, nothing caught your eye. No luxury leather loafers in a shop window, no exquisitely adorned emerald necklaces behind glass. Nothing seemed to interest you.

Until you saw something that made your eyes light up like a child on Christmas. A Build a Bewear Workshop! Tugging on Avery’s hand, the both of you walked into the brightly colored store.

Avery rolled his eyes. It’s a children’s store filled with plushies. And not just that, but clothes for the plushies, shoes for the plushies, gift bags, sweet scents, music boxes. It was absolutely ridiculous! Avery was an elegant adult, and as an elegant adult he did not concern himself with children’s playthings. Weren’t you a little too old for this sort of thing? He scoffed. You weren’t actually going to buy one, were you…?

Whatever judgement Avery was bestowing upon you, you were blind to it. You were too busy looking at the selection of plush pokemon, wondering which one you’d choose. A Pancham with sunglasses and sneakers, a Bonsly that wore a hard hat, a Fidough that smelled like cookie dough. They were all so cute, how could you possibly choose?

You walked around the store, looking for the plushie that spoke to your inner child. And then you found it. Just past the giant Bewear statue in the back left corner of the store, you saw it. A Mime Jr!

Like a proud hunter, you walked over to where Avery was standing, holding what looked to be the velvety skin of a very unfortunate Mime Jr. The plushie hadn’t been stuffed yet. Avery bit his tongue. He couldn’t believe the things he was putting up with for you.

Avery watched you walk up to the chipper looking worker, holding the plushie skin in hand. You handed off Mime Jr to the worker and Avery watched as the machine slowly brought the plushie to life by way of stuffing.

A few minutes later, you returned with an eager little smile on your face, holding your new stuffed friend. Avery looked into the plush Mime Jr’s beady little eyes and… admittedly cute clown nose. Pink and soft and… sweet smelling? You held the plushie up to Avery’s face for him to take a closer sniff. Cotton candy scented. All it needed now was a finishing touch. You walked over to the accessories section —of course there was an accessories section— and chose a miniature pair of round, silver framed glasses for the Mime Jr to wear. You put the glasses on the plush and held it right next to Avery’s face, snickering to yourself. The resemblance was uncanny!

Avery grumbled something about not being a clown and how his powers were still plenty potent. Secretly, he was flattered that you liked him enough to get a plushie to look like him. As silly as it was, it made you happy and besides it was elegant enough in its own strange, stuffed way. He wasn’t going to tell you that of course. No, he was going to do the gentlemanly thing and pay for the damn thing. Just to get you out of the store as quickly as possible. Not because he actually liked seeing you happy. Not at all.

You walked out of the store with emptier pockets but a fuller heart <3

[jamdoughnutmagician]

A Slice Of Life (Waitress AU) Part 4

Doctor!Steve Harrington x Waitress!Reader

<- Previous part Next Part ->

Warnings:Billy continues to be an terrible husband, domestic violence (one mention of the reader being slapped)

*not proof-read, sorry..

Word Count:2,434

*dividers by @saradika-graphics

Masterlist // Steve Harrington Masterlist

“Billy murders me in my sleep because I’m having an affair with my doctor” pie. Smash tart blackberries and sun-sweet raspberries into a rich dark chocolate crust.

“I can’t have an affair with my doctor because it’s wrong and I don’t want my husband to kill me” pie. Velvety smooth vanilla custard with sliced banana…

“Y/n!” you’re brought out of your thoughts by Joyce’s cheery voice coming up beside you. “You’re here early, I haven’t even opened up the diner yet.”

“I’m sorry, what?” your mind is still a little hazy at this time of the morning.

“I do hope you didn’t sleep out here last night. A woman in your position needs to sleep in a warm bed at night.” 

“I went home last night, Joyce, don’t you worry about that.” you reassure her. 

“No doubt to that lousy, good-for-nothing husband of yours.” she sighs with a slight shake of her head.

“Billy was passed out in front of the tv by the time I got home last night, so I guess I got lucky there.” you give a soft half-hearted laugh with a smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes. 

“C’mon, I’ll open up and I’ll let you get started.”

You’re already on your feet, drifting around the diner floor, taking orders, serving tables and filling up empty coffee mugs as you go.

As you’re working around, your eyes catch a young mother with her daughter sitting in the booth together. The little girl is quietly sipping from her juice box and scribbling her crayons in a colouring book and her mother is sitting with her, a crayon in her hand, helping her to finish her picture.

You hear Nancy’s voice call out to you, and so you make your way behind the counter where she and Robin are smiling at you.

“We bought you a little present.” Nancy says, sliding a small gift wrapped up in striped wrapping paper and tied up with a pink ribbon.

“It’s just something small that we figured you were going to need.” Robin adds on, leaning in to eagerly watch you unwrap your present.

You pull at the paper to reveal a hard-cover book. 

The First-time Mom’s Hand-book.

“Oh look at that, thank you so much girls.” you smile, leafing through the pages of the book quickly.

“We know you weren’t initially all too thrilled about this whole baby thing, but we thought you could at least read up and be prepared for when she actually does arrive, you know?” Nancy playfully nudges your shoulder.

“We don’t know it’s a she yet, Nance.” you dismiss softly.

“Well you better read it, because this baby is coming whether you like it or not.” Robin nods.

“What if I'm not cut out for being a mother, I could really fuck up this baby’s life and I haven’t even brought them into the world yet.” you slump against the counter 

“You’re not even feeling a little bit maternal towards that baby?” Nancy asks.

“I don’t do anything harmful to this baby, I don’t drink, I watch what I eat, but no, I just don’t feel that immediate rush of affection when I think of this baby.” you sigh. “Maybe being with Billy all these years just sucked all the love and affection right out of me.”

There’s a beat of silence between the three of you for a moment.

“Well I suppose I should be getting back to work.” Nancy says, hopping up from her seat. “Looks like the breakfast rush is starting up.” and with that she rushes off to start serving customers.

“Thanks for the book, Nance, I really do appreciate it.” you call out to her.

Robin places a kind hand on your shoulder before she leaves, leaning in to talk to you.

“There’s all these cool things to do in this book, like here..” she says pointing to a section in the back of the book. “There’s a scrapbook section where you can put silly pictures of you with your pregnant belly as it develops, and there’s also a page where you can write your first letter to your baby.” she smiles.

“Oh, okay, thanks Rob.” you say softly, offering her a kind smile, before she leaves you alone at the counter.

Your eyes stare down at the blank page where your baby’s first letter is supposed to be. You slip the book into the front pocket of your apron, not giving it too much though as you begin to start another day of work. Waltzing around the diner’s sticky floors, chasing after customer’s orders and re-filling endless cups of coffee.

Back home, whilst Billy is at work, you hastily pack yourself a small suitcase, filling it with only enough clothes to see you finally, once and for all get away from your husband.

Sitting down on the bench by the bus stop, suitcase at your feet, your mind strays, thinking about what kind of first letter you should write to your baby. 

Dear baby, If I was writing you a letter in all honesty it would probably be a letter of apology. I know that everyone deserves a mom who would want a nice baby such as yourself. The kind of mom who is a good wife and an upstanding member of society, but it would be wrong of me to say that that’s me. I worry that I'm doing the right thing by bringing you into this world when it’s already so messed up. I’m sorry, baby, that I don’t seem like the typical excited mom-to-be, but I don’t know what I can offer you. What if I leave Billy but don’t win that pie contest next week and don’t win the money? What happens to us then? All my life I’ve been so scared that all I want to do is run away, and that sure as hell isn’t something that a baby like you deserves. I wish I could feel all the feeling that’s expected of a new mother, to feel that giddy excitement that you’re with me right now, to feel that rush of reassurance that I’ll be a good mother, even if my life isn’t in such a great place. Anyway, I’m writing this letter to you, and in some small way I suppose I’m writing this letter to myself too.

Love, Mom.

The crushing of gravel under car tires brings you out of your thoughts and you cast your eyes up to see where the noise is coming from and your stomach drops at the sight of your husband’s dark Camaro rolling to a stop in front of you. His heavy boots step out onto the ground as he slams the door behind him and strides towards you.

Billy crouches down, bearing his hands on his knees as he fixes you with a menacing glare.

“And where do you think you’re going?”

“Nowhere, Billy.” you mumble softly. “I-I mean I had to go to work..”

“Then why the fuck have you got a suitcase, huh?”

Because I’ve finally had enough of your shit, Billy. Because I’m sick of the way you treat me. Because I deserve better than this, I deserve better than you.

The eerie silence that hangs in the air. You don’t have an answer for him. At least not an answer that he was going to be pleased to hear. 

The silence from you is more than enough of an answer for him as he slaps his hand across your face, stinging your skin with the force of his blow. Bubbling tears threatening to spill from your eyes.

“Shut up and get in the car.” he spits as he shoves you towards the passenger’s side door, and throws your suitcase in the back seat. 

The tension in the car as Billy drives the pair of you home is icy. Uncomfortably cold and unwelcoming.

“A pie baking contest, huh?” he scoffs, keeping his eyes on the road, never daring to look your way.

You snivel, wiping the tear tracks on your cheek with the sleeve of your cardigan.

“Yeah, I was just going to go up there and win and surprise you with the prize money when I came home.”

“Nah, nah, I know you’re lying to me, sweetheart.” his voice grumbles. “You ain’t ever been to any pie contest before.” His voice is unmistakably hostile, his one hand lifting off the steering wheel to shove against your face, forcefully pushing you against the window. “YOU’RE FUCKING LYING TO ME!” he screams.

“BILLY STOP IT! I’M PREGNANT!” you shout.

And it’s at your admission that his foot is slamming on the brake and the tires screeching to a halt in the middle of the road.

“So when were you going to tell me?” he rasps out.

pulling out the chair from under the dining table, you take your seat next to him, sitting down with a soft huff.

“I was going to tell you after I won the contest.”

“Well you can kiss that dumb pie contest goodbye, ‘cause you ain’t going anywhere now, darling” Billy scoffs. “‘Cause here’s the thing, what if you decide that you love this baby more than you love me. It happens all the time, they have a baby, then the man is out of the picture.” 

“You’re jealous of the baby?” you murmur quietly.

“I ain’t jealous, it’s not in my nature to be jealous, I’m just talking about my feelings. I know how you women get. I just don’t know if I want that happening to me.” 

“So what do you want me to say, Billy?”

“Well I’d tell you to get rid of it, but somehow I don’t see that happening, so how about you promise me that you won’t end up loving this baby more than you love me. That you make a real effort to be a good little wife to me. I come first every time, not some damn baby.”

There’s that uncomfortable silence again, slowly closing in on you, making you feel the loneliest you have ever felt.  

“So, do you think you can promise me that? That this baby won’t come between us?” 

No.

“I promise.” 

“Well how ‘bout that, huh? Looks like I knocked you up real good, I gotta say I thought you were getting chubbier, I guess now we know why. I bet it happened that night got you drunk” he laughs to himself.

You push yourself away from the table quickly, needing to get away from him 

“Where are you rushing off too?”

“I gotta throw up.”

Steve strolls into the doctor’s room where you’re already sitting up on the reclining bed, a medical gown draped over your frame.

“Y/n.” he smiles warmly.

“Dr. Harrington.” you smile back.

“I haven’t had any calls from you, you haven’t been having any problems?”

With my husband? Oh, there are far too many problems to mention. 

“With the baby? No, no problems at all, doctor.”

“Good, good. So today I’m going to be doing your ultrasound, so we can check out your baby’s development and see how things are progressing. Does that sound okay to you?”

You nod, immediately put at ease by his gentle manner.

“Okay if you could just lie back for me please and hold your gown out of the way.”

You settle yourself back, lying flat against the bed as you roll the hem of your medical gown up to reveal the small bump of your belly.

“Okay, so this isn’t going to hurt at all, it’s just going to be a little bit cold is all.” he tells you, squirting a small amount of gel on your stomach, and gently pressing the ultrasound wand against your skin and moving it around.

“Okay…ah! There we are. There’s your baby.”

You turn your head towards the monitor to see the black and white image on the screen.

“Wonderful! Everything looks perfectly normal and healthy, and do you see that little flickering in the middle of the screen?” he says, pointing his finger on the monitor. “That’s your baby’s heartbeat.”

Something about seeing the gentle thump of the tiny life growing inside you suddenly made this all feel real. Before now it was all too easy to pretend that it wasn’t real, that it wasn’t happening, that it was just another thing that you could stash away deep in the back of your mind to where you didn’t have to think about it. But there it was, your baby, as clear as day, perfectly healthy.

“It certainly doesn’t look much like a baby yet.” you say with a soft shake of your head.

“No, I suppose it doesn’t, but things will start to take shape a lot quicker than you expect, I promise.” he nods. “Okay, everything looks good to me, if you want to pull your gown back down.” he says, handing you some tissues to wipe the gel from your skin.

“Thank you, Doctor.” you nod, as you pull yourself together.

“Y/n, I want to let you know that I’ve been thinking about you a lot. I know it’s very unprofessional of me, and god knows I’d probably be fired from my job if anyone ever found out about what we were doing but I like you, and I just think…”

You stop him in his tracks, pulling him forward by his white coat and pressing your lips against his. He leans into the kiss, slipping his tongue past your lips as you moan quietly. His hands cradle your head, fingers weaving amongst your hair, desperately trying to pull you closer.

“Don’t do that again.” he says between panted breaths, pulling away from your lips.

“Do what? Kiss you?”

“No, not that, definitely not that. Don’t go away for a full month without calling, Y/n.”

“What was I supposed to do, Steve, I’ve got a crazy husband who’s watching my every move.” you sigh, holding your head in your hands. “I wanted to call you, believe me, I did. It’s just harder for me when I’ve got Billy breathing down my neck every time I step out the door.”

“I just know how I feel about you, I like you a lot, Y/n and I wanna see you, I know this whole thing is crazy, all I’m asking is that you give me a chance.” He says with a soft smile and a sparkle in those beautiful hazel-brown eyes. "I don't care that you're married, I can see you're unhappy, and I just think I could be the one to make you happy"

@keerygal @penguinsandpotterheads @paybacksawitch @mrsjellymunson @seatnights @ali-r3n @potatobeanpies

[ayatai]

Tree Climbing

Comfy-vember Day 12 Prompt: Hand on Shoulder

“The trail ends here. The mountain gets too steep for horses.” Rosella reached over Snowdrop’s head and slid the bit out of his mouth so he could graze, but didn’t dismount. “You’re not afraid of heights, are you?”

Alexander thought of the mountaintop he’d grown up on as he did the same for his own black mount. That mountain had been taller, and they hadn’t even ridden all the way up this one. “No.”

“Good.”

In an impressive move, Rosella stood on her saddle, balancing just long enough to jump up onto the tree limb above her.

“I don’t think I can do that, though.” He’d barely felt confident enough in his horseback riding skills to join her on the ride today.

“Here, take my hand. I’ll hold you steady. This branch should be strong enough for both of us.”

“Should? Why are we doing this, exactly?” he asked as he took her hand and climbed up beside her.

“Because we can? Because the view’s incredible? Did you need a reason to climb trees as a kid?”

As she continued upward, Alexander muttered to himself, “We didn’t have any.”

She heard him anyway. “Any what?”

“Trees.”

She looked back down at him, appalled. “All right then… um, just do exactly what I do.”

He lagged a little behind her until she stopped and said, “Here’s another big branch. Look at that!”

Once he’d pulled himself up beside her, he looked outward for the first time. She was right; the view really was beautiful. Daventry spread out before them, the castle in the distance with flags waving. He’d seen a similar view before, while crossing the mountain pass after sailing to Daventry, but that had been at night, and some of it had been on fire.

“Impressive.” Though having grown up with a similar view, he didn’t think it had quite the impact she thought it would. In a way, it made him miss Llewdor a little, watching the sunrises over the ocean. He hadn’t seen the ocean since coming home.

“Isn’t it? You can barely see the village beyond that hill, and the town Tamart’s from is over that way. Oh, and can you see the lake? It’s hard to see through the trees.”

“I see it.”

“Anywhere in particular you want to visit next?”

It all looked lovely, but where he where he really wanted to go…

“Do you think… what about the beach?”

She tilted her head, thinking. “We’d have to ask Dad and Mama, and take a proper escort. But I like that idea! I haven’t been there in ages.”

After pointing out a few more landmarks, she asked, “Would you rather I go down first, or you?”

“I can. I’ve climbed down before, just not up.”

As they worked their way down, she asked, “How did you get up in the first place, then?”

“Flew. I was a bird at the time. The spell wore off, and I had to change back to a human while in the tree. Not easy.”

She shook her head in amazement. “One of these days you really are going to have to tell me this story, start to finish.”

He was saved from having to respond to that by reaching the lowest limb. Their horses had wandered off a little way; he carefully lowered himself down by his arms, then dropped the remaining distance.

“I’m do-” He cut off as he heard a branch breaking. He looked up and barely had time to get his arms up to catch Rosella as she fell. They both landed on the ground in a heap.

Apparently, that last branch hadn’t been strong enough for two after all.

“Ow.” Alexander tried to take stock, but it was hard with his sister still on top with him. “Rosella, I can’t breathe.”

“Sor… sorry.” She scooted over, and he sat up.

“Are you all right?” he asked. He was sore but not seriously hurt.

Her face was tight with pain, and she was holding her right hand close to her chest. “I landed on it wrong. You’re not hurt, are you?”

“I’m fine.” He looked around but didn’t see their horses. “Snowdrop and Slate must have spooked and run back down the trail. Do you think you can walk for a bit?”

She nodded. He held her by her good arm while they walked, making sure she didn’t fall on the uneven sections and make her injury worse.

“What kind of bird?”

“Huh?”

“Distract me. You said you changed yourself into a bird. What kind?”

“Oh. An eagle.”

She burst out laughing, then hissed in pain as the movement jostled her hand. “Sorry, I tried to picture you as an eagle. I don’t know why it was so funny.”

He snorted softly. “If you think that’s amusing… before that, I had to change into a fly.”

“A fly? The annoying, get-off-my-food kind of fly?”

“Yep.”

That set her off laughing again. He got the feeling the pain was making her a little loopy. Thankfully, he spotted their horses around the next bend, happily grazing again. He chirruped, and they both trotted over as if feeling guilty for abandoning their riders.

“Here, I’ll help you up.”

Rosella grimaced again as the horses ambled homeward, but this time not from the pain. “There’s something I should tell you; I kind of ditched the guard we were supposed to have with us.”

He shot her a questioning look.

“I can tell you don’t like it when they follow us around. I thought you could use the break. And… well, they wouldn’t have let us climb up there!”

For good reason. He kept that thought to himself and said instead, “Thanks. I think. But I don’t imagine Mother’s going to be happy.”

What had she gotten him into? Anxiety fluttered in his stomach; he ignored it. It’s different now.

She sighed. “No, I don’t suppose she will. Or Dad. But don’t worry, they’ll know it was my idea.”

[abbyslev]

𝑪𝑳𝑶𝑺𝑬𝑹- 𝑯𝑨𝑵𝑮𝑬 𝑿 𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑫𝑬𝑹

A/N: here’s a stupid idea i’ve had in my brain for a min and i FINALLY finished it! also don’t mind typos or anything, slightly tipsy rn. (dont drink tequila and vodka and use beer as a chaser??? EVER ???) anyway, enjoy enjoy😊👍🏼 my trip is so good currently like you guys i’ve never been so happy :(

WARNINGS: thigh riding, eating out, praise (IS THAT BAD IDFK 🤯), lots of kissing, fingering and whatever else i added in here idk i cant think rn 🤷🏻

You set your coffee down, eyebrows furrowing. “Problem?” Erwin looked up, eyes searching your stressed face. 

     “Yeah, uhm, just some bio homework. I really regret taking this fucking class.” You laugh, spinning your computer around to show him. His eyebrows raised, pushing your computer back to you. Levi approached you two, handing Erwin his food and placing your sandwich beside your drink. He read it over your shoulder before scoffing and sitting down next to Erwin. “Thank you.” He mumbled to Levi before kissing his hand. You scrunch your nose up, making a gagging noise. “In public is crazy.” You tease them with a smile. 

          “How am I supposed to figure this out?” You slap your hands on your face, dragging them down. “Your fault for choosing that class for extra credit.” Levi chuckled. “Shut up.” You roll your eyes. The three of you always met up at the library to study a lot, and today was one of those days. Unlucky for you, you were learning some pretty hard stuff, and had a hard time understanding it. It was starting to stress you out. “Just leave it for another day, email your professor and tell them to explain it better.” Erwin looked up from his computer, meeting your stressed eyes.

        “Hiya, everyone! Oooh, is that stem cells and the tissue formation process?” They leaned over, taking a glance at your computer. You perk up, meeting their excited eyes. “Yeah, do you know anything about it?” You question, watching as they set all their stuff down. They pull up a chair, sitting beside you. “Now you got them riled up.” Levi scoffed. “Oh shut up.” You sigh. “This is one of my favorite topics, since there's so many theories around it and the things that actually happen, which is why it's considered one of the harder topics. I passed this section with an easy 100.” Hange smiled.

         “Do you think you could help me? I can pay you!” You smile. “There's no need! I can help you anytime, you just text me the time and place.” Hange seemed fine on the outside, but on the inside they were exploding. Hange met you through Levi and Erwin. You guys lived next to each other and you hung out with Erwin and Levi a lot. Hange had some lengthy conversations with you but they never hung out with you one on one. This was a big step for them. Levi bumped Erwins elbow, eyeing you two. 

      “That would be great!” You pulled out your phone, allowing them to put in their number.  “What do you study?” You look up at them, admiring their excited brown eyes. “Biology!” they answer with a huge smile. You two engulf yourself in a conversation, completely forgetting the time. It wasn't until Erwin lightly tapped your shoulder, showing you his phone. “Oh, thanks.” You smile. 

         You two pack up your stuff, following Erwin and Levi out. “They’re so cute.” Hange points at their hands. Erwin had clasped him against Levi’s, leading him towards the car. “Did you need a ride home?” Hange turned to you, smiling. “I usually ride with them, but i don't mind riding with you if it's not a bother.” You smile. “Of course not!” Hange lead you to their car. “I’ll meet you guys later!” You called towards the two. “Sounds good.” Erwin waved, but gave Levi that knowing look. Hange opened your door, smiling. A certain item caught your eye.

       Hange had a frog plush sitting on their dash. “Where did you get this? Do you know what rare item you hold?” You slowly turn to them as they turn on the car. “Oh, yes. Do you know how much that cost me?” They push up their glasses before pulling off to your apartment. They played quiet music on the way back, occasionally cracking a joke or pointing something out. 

        They pull to a stop, unlocking the doors. “Thank you so much, I owe you lunch tomorrow! Do you just want to come over? It's gonna be crowded tomorrow.” You grab your bag and cup, turning to them. “Oh! Sure!” They nod quickly. “Sweet. Drive safe.” You close their door and wave, before walking inside. You peek out your window to see that they had only started driving off. They waited for you to get inside your apartment. You slap a hand over your mouth, screaming. You run to your bed, kicking your feet and squealing. God, you felt like you were a teenage girl with her first crush. 

        You always admired hange from afar. You had a math class with them last semester and you occasionally talked to them when Levi and Erwin were around, but never alone. You shook with excitement, too excited to do anything else. Hange was perfect in every way and now they were going to help you? You thanked yourself for keeping calm in front of them. You got up, heading to the shower. You had no idea how you were going to go to bed with this much excitement.

-

        You deep cleaned your apartment, and it felt like you were overdoing everything. A knock echoed through your home. You opened the door, smiling. 

          Hange had many books and a bag of food in their hand. “Come on in.” You smile, moving aside. “You can sit on the dinner table.” “Thanks!” They sit down. You join the, pulling out your computer. “You didn't have to get me anything!” You shake your head as they slide a bagel towards you. “Want anything to drink?” You offer. “A water is fine!” You stood up, grabbing two bottles from the fridge. You hand them one, sitting back down. 

       “So, where do you want to start?” They lean over to see your computer. “Here,” You pint. “Thats where we have to start, but its hard to understand it, i cant find theories in out book so i cant understand it.” You sigh. Hange opened a book up, trying to find a section. Their eyebrows furrowed, pushing their glasses up. “Oh! Here it is. This book practically answers everything youre looking for!” Hange slides the book over. 

        It had been a couple hours, and neither of you could explain how you ended up like this. You typed your last paragraph as Hange was above you, arms on either side of you and chin on top of your head. You two spent hours figuring stuff out, and even getting to know eachother. You typed the last sentence bewfore leaning back into their chest, groaning.

“Finally!’ You hit submit, stretching you neck. “See? That wasnt so bad!” Hange smiled. “Not for you!” You joked. “Thanks a lot for that, in really needed it. We have about three more assignments until the final quiz, if you want to help me with those too id be down!” You turn to look at them. It took all your might to not stare at their arms. In the hours of studying, Hange had taken off their flannel, leaving them in their black tank top and sweatoants. 

       “Sure! You just let me know and i can help.” They smile. After cleansing up and making sure they werent forgetting anything, they said their goodbyes and went on their way.

_

FIVE WEEKS LATER

          In the time that had passed, Hange and you had become close, inseparable you could say. The two of you did everything together. It had went from tutoring sessions to hangouts and eventually sleepovers. Erwin and Levi had caught on pretty quick, thanks to Hanges rants about you.  

       Levi handed Hange their food, sitting in front of them. “Levi, you have no idea how cute they are! LIke the way they caught on so quick asnd now they understand more than they could! And they got us this lego set to build, and we had pizza after! So good. And they did my hair too, doesnt it look so kuch softer?” Hange went on and on, their face turning red and eyes sparkling with excitement. Levi raised a brow, drinking his tea. “So youre in love with them?” Levi spat out. “Wha- no! Levi, that’s my friend! Nothing more.” Hange huffed, rolling their eyes. 

            From then on, Levi and Erwin kept an eye on you two. It was the small details that they had caught onto. You wore Hange’s favorite flannel, you always had a hair tie on your wrist if Hange ever needed one, Hange always carried your favorite chapstick and favorite gum. They started to form their own theories about you two. 

        Hange had woken up nervous, today was your big day! You finally had your big test on the things they had helped you study with. They knew how it had been eating you inside, but you had gotten a perfect score on all your small quizzes, so you should nail this, right? Hange sent you a long, sweet message making sure that you were prepared and that you were going to crush the test. You replied back, making Hange squeal. They invited you to dinner afterwards, at their house. You two could bake cookies and watch movies after. You accepted, saying it would ease your nerves.

-

        Hours had passed, and Hange nervously chewed on their fingers. How long would it be until you texted them?

       Suddenly, their door burst open, you running in, shaking a paper everywhere and cheering. Hange stood up from the couch, watching you with a smile. “What is it?” Hange tried to calm you down, but you couldnt stop jumping everywhere. “What is it, lemme see!” Hange grabbed your wrist, trying to get ahold of the paper. A pair of lips met Hamge’s, catching them by surprise. Hange’s eyes closed slowly, hands on either side of your face. You dropped the papers, tangling your hands through their short, soft hair. You two pulled away from the kiss, breathing in for air.

      “I passed with a one hundred.” You smile. Hange’s mouth dropped, eyes meeting the paper on the floor. There it was, a big 100 in red pen. Hange turned to you, pulling you back in for another kiss. You happily kissed them back, smiling against their lips. Hange’s hands slid under your shirt, hands rubbing up and down your waist. You hold on to their arm, whimpering. 

     Hange pushed you against the couch softly without breaking this kiss. You push them back down, throwing your leg over them and straddling them. You pulled your shirt off, the cold air sending shivers down your spine. Hange placed a hand on your bare back, pushing your body closer. They kissed all over your chest, leaving you in a mess.

     You grind your hips against their lap, lips whispering their name. “Be patient.” Hange laughed against your shoulder. “But I deserve it, no?” You pulled back, hands on their side of their face, lips ghosting over theirs. “I’ll show you what you deserve.” They pushed your head towards them, kissing the corner of your mouth down to your jaw.

      “Mngh, fuck.” You unbutton their shirt, hands running up and down their soft stomach. Hange pulled off their shirt, lips busy on your neck. You dig your nails into their skin, sucking in a deep breath as they focus on that one spot. 

         Hange picked you up from their lap, laying you down on the couch. They straddled you, hands palming your chest. Your face scrunched up, lips trembling. Hange kissed down your stomach, eyes focused on your pretty face. 

         They pull down your sweatpants, pressing a wet kiss on your hip bone. “Hange, please.” You yank your pants off, your core aching for some attention. Hange traced shapes on your thighs, running their lips up and down your inner thigh. You bucked your hips foward, hands in their hair. 

       Hange pushed your hips down with force, nails digging into your skin. Seeing you all spread out like this, begging for them was all they could ever ask for. Their lips finally met your wet cunt. Your legs closed around their head, a loud moan leaving your lips. You covered your mouth, stomach caving with every stripe of their tongue. 

         Hange pulled your hand away, placing it on your chest. They squeezed your boob, before slowly trailing their hand down to your thighs. They pushed them up, giving them more access. They pushed two fingers in you, watching as your back arched, fingers trying to find a grip on something. 

        They started off slow, thumb playing with your clit. They rested their head on your thigh, kissing it softly. Their soft, brown eyes met yours, which fluttered with every move they made. Your cheeks were tinted pink and lips were swollen from you biting down on them. 

        “Such a good baby. You worked so hard.” Hange praised you, fingers starting to speed up. Your legs threatened to close at any second, but you tried with all your might to not let them. It felt as if you couldn’t control your body, you were being washed over with euphoria.

      “God fucking damn, Hange!” You manage to spit out. Hange replaced their thumb with their mouth, sending you to the edge. You run your hands through their hair, legs shaking. Hange goes faster, watching as your legs close around their head once again. You arch your back, uncontrollable mewls leaving your mouth. Hange pulls out their fingers, immediately licking you up. 

         “Fuckfuckfuck!” You slur out, eyes shutting closed. Hange cleans you up, holding your waist down again. They come back up to you, kissing you. You messily kiss them back, body too tired to do anything else. 

        They sit down beside you, pulling you back into their lap. It felt like your legs were going to give out at any moment. “Hange…so tired.” You lean into their chest, kissing their neck.  “One more, baby… just one more.” Hange kissed your lips. You slowly started moving your hips against their thigh, light whimpers leaving your mouth. 

      “That’s it, just like that.” Hange helped you, their large hands moving you back and forth. “You did so good. Im so proud of you.” Hange pressed a kiss against your forehead, down to your lips and then your jaw. You fastened your pace, ignoring the ache in your legs.

       Hange looked unreal. Their hair had gotten loose from its usual updo from you messing with it, cheeks were dusted with pink and their eyes were dark and lustful. Their glasses slid off their nose slowly, lips crashing against yours

       Their glasses fogged, making you giggle against their lips. Hange gripped the fat of your hips, crescent-like pink shapes marking your skin. They placed their mouth on your cheek, warm breath fawning your face. They sloppily kissed the edge of your mouth, brain too fuzzy to think of anything else. 

       “I love you so much.” Your hands were on either side of Hange’s face, eyes meeting theirs. Hange felt their heart swell, just a couple weeks ago they were daydreaming about you and now they had you into a moaning mess for them.

        “I love you so much more.” They kissed you hard, wanting to bring you impossibly closer. “Hange, fuck.” You repeated over and over again, legs shaking and fastening your pace. “That’s it.” Hange pushed your hair back, nose against your cheek. 

        Your fingernails dug into their back, curse words and Hange’s name slurring out of your mouth. Hange held the back of your head, other hand on your lower back, bringing you closer. “Fuck, just like that.” They kissed your neck.  You slowed down, feeling their stomach and back, eyes closed. 

      “Should’ve asked you for help sooner.” You said, out of breath. “Mm, I guess we just found a new stress reliever, though.” Hange laughed, kissing your lips. 

[pasiveagressive]

Broken Bones III // H.S.

PART 1   PART 2

Tumblr and I messed up so you get two parts today🫣

Enjoy!

Harry took the steps of her apartment building two at a time. She lived in a nice set of apartments on the seventh floor and the elevator was broken. He couldn't find it in himself to care.

707. He knocked. It was about 5 till 8 and he hoped she wasn't that serious about waiting till 8, he hadn't been able to contain himself from seeing her any longer.

The door opened and a very different Y/N was looking at him. At the hospital she wore scrubs and looked like she was ready for anything. On Friday her make up was all done up and she had been sporting a dress, ready for some fun. Today she was wearing a too big shirt tucked into the front of her soft shorts and a pair of fuzzy socks on her feet. Her hair was back in double braids and her face clear of all makeup. She was nothing short of adorable.

"Hey." He said from where he was leaning against the door frame.

"Hi." She opened the door for him. "I like the pajamas."

He grinned, looking down at himself. An old pair of sesame street pajama pants and a t-shirt.

"Figured you would."

She shook her head leading him into her apartment. It was big, the kind of apartment you'd expect a doctor to have. It was filled with whites and grays, modern looking everything. Everything besides the pictures lining the walls. All colorful, all standing out against the bleakness of the apartment.

She led him through her kitchen, also modern but with brightly colored centerpieces and to her family room. There was a fireplace in white stone, also adorned with colorful pieces and a large tv in front of a large sectional. There were floor to ceiling windows instead of walls, thick curtains hanging on their sides. It was homey and modern all at once.

He put the movie on the coffee table and plopped down on the couch next to her.

"I like your place." He commented, looking over at her.

"Thanks." She smiled. "Normally it's really messy but my brother stayed the week a couple weeks ago and I haven't been around long enough to mess it up again."

He laughed. "Are you close with your brother?"

She nodded. "Very. He's an FBI agent and a workaholic, like me. He just finished a difficult case and he needed a break so he came and stayed here for a bit. I forgot how much I missed him until he was standing at the other side of the door."

"That must be hard, having a brother in danger all the time."

"Kind of." She shrugged. "He's really good at his job and he's not as reckless as he once was."

Harry nodded, wondering what kind of test he'd have to pass if he ever got anywhere with Y/N. And God did he want to.

“So I had an idea.”

“What’s that?” He replied

“How about instead of a dance I paint your cast? I’m not a half bad artist according to my family.”

He found himself nodding.

"Alright. Ready to make my cast pretty?" He asked her, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Born ready." She laughed climbing to her feet. "Come to my office."

He laughed, taking the hand she held out to him. She pulled him up and lead him through the kitchen and down a hall. He passed a guest bedroom, a closet, and than he was walking into what was supposed to be another spare bedroom. Instead it was filled with her art. There were canvases everywhere, both finished and blank. Bottles of paint were everywhere along with brushes.

"This is what the rest of the house normally looks like." She grinned at him.

He was to busy staring at some of her works to really notice.

"You're literally perfect." He said, aware of the awe in his own voice. "At everything."

There were paintings of oceans and mountains. People and animals. Colorful and black and white ones. Realistic and cartoonistic. Everything.

"These are amazing." He said, looking over at her. He hadn't really thought of how good she'd be but she was perfect at everything else so he wondered how he could have thought she'd be anything but.

She shook her head, blushing slightly. "Just tell me what you want painted."

He shrugged. "I don't know. You're good at everything, surprise me."

She shook her head again, grabbing a basket and putting several different colors in them. He took them from her and walked back to the living room after her. She was carrying some newspapers and brushes.

"Alright, you make the popcorn and I'll get the movie ready."

He did as he was told, finding the popcorn button on the microwave and letting it do its thing. And then he was going through her cabinets trying to find a bowl to put the popcorn in. He finally found one, a large blue tub, when the popping stopped. There was nothing he hated more than burned popcorn. He poured it into the bowl before walking back to the couch.

She already had the movie in and ready go. Star Wars episode one. He had taken a gander and judging by the look on her face he had nailed it on the head. And he also hoped it would be an opening, there were several more to watch.

"How'd you know I loved The Notebook." She asked when he sat down, an extremely large smile on her face.

"I took a guess." He shrugged. "You seem like someone who appreciates good cinema when they see it."

She laughed before grabbing the remote and pressing play. While she was gone she had also poured multiple colors on a board.

"Figure out what you wanted to paint?" He asked, laying the newspapers on the floor and on the couch. She didn't seem all that bothered by the potential disaster it could cause.

She nodded. "And if you don't like it it's your own fault."

He put his cast in her lap over a newspaper and told her to have at it.

"It's a surprise." She told him, pushing his head so he was looking at the tv. "No peeking."

"Alright." He laughed, grabbing the popcorn and putting it in his lap.

If it wasn't for her quoting the movie and laughing at the right parts he wouldn't have been known she was watching it. He had looked over a few times, not at the cast, and has seen the look of concentration on her face. Her eyebrows were furrowed, eyes never looking away from his cast, and body tensed and relaxed all at once.

"And done." She told him when the movie had an hour left.

Her looked over and his jaw promptly dropped. It was an ocean. complete with silhouettes of animals and a sunset. It was beautiful.

"Y/N, literally how." He asked speechless.

She laughed. "Shhh, the movie isn't over yet."

He honestly didn't really care, it was something he'd seen a million times. He was too busy turning his arm every which way to see the masterpiece that was on his arm. He never wanted to take it off. So he told her that.

Y/N gave him a look. "I'll paint you something else." Her attention turned back to the movie.

Harry wondered how much better her work would be when she had a flat canvas with no bumps on it. He really wanted to find out.

"Promise." He held out his pinkie.

She looked over at him. "Promise." She took his pinkie with hers.

When the painting on his arm was dry he got up and turned the lights off and grabbed a fluffy blanket from the rack.

She put everything on the coffee table and rested against his side, his arm around her. The blanket lay across them and he thought he might be in heaven.

He knew he was when he woke up to her practically laying on top of him, head rested on his chest. The sun shown through the window and he wondered what time it was. It had been a long time since he had slept past 8 in the morning. The clock above the tv told him it was 10.

"Y/N." He ran his arm up and down her back. "It's 10 o'clock, when do you have to get to work?"

She grunted against him, burrowing herself further in his chest. He laughed slightly, still running his hand up and down her back.

"Y/N." He tried to coax her out of sleep. "Let's make breakfast."

She turned slightly at that. Eyes blinking their way open.

"What time is it." She sleepily murmured, fists rubbing her eyes.

"It's a little after 10." He moved his hand from her back to her hair. "What time do you have to be at the hospital."

"Not till noon." She yawned, sitting up. "Breakfast sounds good though."

He sat up with her, smiling. "Good, I'm starving."

"I fell asleep on your abs and now I'm wondering how you have those."

Harry let out a surprised laugh. "I work out, and run around a stage for a living that's how."

She shook her head, climbing off the couch. "Come on." She gave him her hand. "I want bacon. And pancakes."

He took her hand. "All I know how to make is bacon so you're on pancake duty."

"Deal." She grinned.

He followed her to the kitchen and watched her take out everything they needed, trying to remember where she kept everything for next time. Hopefully there'd be a next time.

"Here." She got out the electric skillet for the bacon. "You'll take longer than me."

He got to work, opening the packet of bacon and squeezing as many as he could in the pan.

"How do you want yours cooked?" He asked her.

"I like mine crispy." She smiled over at him.

"Good." He smiled back. "Me too."

"Waffles or pancakes?" She asked, staring at the bag of mix in her hands.

" Waffles. " He said automatically.

"My favorite."

And they worked in silence, her finishing before he did.

"What do you want to drink?" She asked, breaking said silence.

"What do you have." He asked, flipping the bacon for the final time.

"Tea, orange juice, coffee, or water." She read off.

" Orange juice. " He smiled over at her. "Please."

"You got it."

"This smells so good."

Before he could say anything his phone started ringing from the living room. He wouldn't have answered it if it wasn't Mitch's ringtone.

"One second." He told her and ran to get his phone .

"What?" He asked in to the phone.

"Where are you?"

" Why? "

"You were supposed to be at the studio 20 minutes ago."

"I'll be there soon."

"Where are you?"

"Bye Mitch." He said, hanging up the phone.

"Everything alright?" She asked as he slid into his seat.

"I forgot I was supposed to be at the studio today.”

"Oh." She looked apologetic. "Do you need to go?"

" I've got time. " He smiled over at her. "You're only about a five minute drive from my place, plus they can’t really do much with out me."

She smiled. "Good, cause I can't eat all this myself."

He laughed, taking a bite of his waffle. It was really good.

"Is there anything you're not good at?" He asked her.

"Anything that requires musical talent." She said instantly.

"Really." He laughed. "One of the very few things I can do."

" I prefer to express art in other ways. " She shrugged.

"Yeah well you need to teach my sister how to cook cause she's complete shit at it." He told her, munching on the bacon.

"You're literally eating waffles." She told him. "Anyone can make waffles. "

"I can't." He stuck his tongue out at her.

"Sorry." She shook her head. "Anyone with half a brain can make waffles."

He gasped, bringing his hand up to his heart. "You take that back."

"Or what?" She challenged, narrowing her eyes.

"I'm going to tickle you." He raised his good hand menacingly.

"I'd like to see you try."

He got up as quick as he could, surprising her slightly. She shrieked and ran around the table, him catching her in about two steps.

"Stop." She laughed loudly.

"Say I'm smarter than you and have way better abs and a better personality than you."

"Someone's desperate." She said through her laughter.

"Say it." He tickled her harder.

"Okay okay. " She swatted his hands away. "You're smarter than me and have way better abs and a better personality." She turned in his arms. "Now can I get back to my waffles please."

He nodded, letting go of her before he did something stupid like kiss her.

"Want to come to my place on Tuesday?" He asked before he lost his nerve.

She smiled at him. "Can I come in my pajamas?"

He smiled back. "Of course."

"Sleepover?" She asked. "I get off at midnight on Monday and I normally sleep the whole morning away."

He nodded again, wondering if he was friend zoning himself.

"Sounds like a plan." He finished the last of his food and took it to the sink. She followed him, dropping the dishes next to his. And they did the dishes together, something that he normally hated but she somehow made fun.

"I've got to go." He dried his hands on a towel. "Thanks for everything." He dropped a kiss to her head. "Have fun at work."

She smiled up at him. "Anytime. And don't kill anyone, I don't have time to take on another off duty patient."

He laughed, walking out the door. "You're mine anyways."

The door closed behind him, shutting the laughter off from his ears. And when he finally made it to the studio, the smile was still on his face. Even if he got interrogated by Mitch and then Gemma when she arrived.

_______________________________________________________________________

"Here." His phone dinged at 12:37 on Tuesday morning.

He smiled despite the time, heading out the door and down the stairs so he could walk her up.

"Hey." He greeted when he saw her at the bottom of his stairs.

She looked up surprised, and very tired. "Hey." She sounded tired too.

"Ready for bed?" He asked her, holding out his hand.

She nodded, taking it and following blindly after him. She was still in her scrubs and she had a bag on her back. He hoped she had brought her pajamas cause he had made sure he put his on. Red with fire trucks on them, he never thought he'd wear them again, or let anyone know he still had them.

"Long day?" He asked her.

She nodded. "There was a lot of near deaths and actual deaths tonight."

He stopped in front of his door.

"I'm sorry." He brought her into his arms, running his hand down her back. "People shouldn't do stupid shit." He tried to make light of the situation.

To his horror she started crying. "There was this old man who had a heart attack and I had to tell his wife of 50 years that he didn't make it." She wiped angrily at her face.

"Shhh." He ran his hands through her hair. "You should go take a shower, wash away some of the pain."

" I was thinking of punching a wall actually. "

He smiled despite himself. "You mean you didn't learn from my mistake."

She smiled through her tears.

He laughed this time, thinking that maybe it was okay and she wasn't going to start crying again.

" I mean the unbearable pain you go through when the annoying x-ray guy pokes and prods at your freshly broken arm for 20 minutes as he tries to keep his eyes open."

She laughs, running her hands down her face. "I'm sorry I'm such a mess, I'm normally okay, I just." She stopped, swallowing a visible lump in her throat.

He grabbed her face in his hands. "Hey, it's alright." He kissed her forehead. "I want to be this person to you, I'm here for you when you're tired of being perfect all the time."

She choked on her laugh. "Thanks. Now about that shower?"

He laughed, opening the door and pulling her in with him. The apartment was rather messy, something that happened whenever Gemma was in town.

"Sorry." He smiled sheepishly at her as she tripped on a heel. "Gemma's a mess."

She laughed, finding her balance on a wall.

"It's alright, I'm just like half asleep right now."

He smiled at her, leading her through the kitchen and to his room. He had bought a three bedroom apartment with the thought that maybe Gemma would need a place to stay if she ever left the bastard.

He used the master himself, he didn't care about the size, he just liked that he got his own bathroom. Y/N shut the door to it and he smiled to himself, walking out of his room, shutting it as he went. Gemma is waiting on the balcony to talk, something they did every time they came. Drake was on the couch sleeping. They had a rule, Gemma had to sleep alone, something he thought she was secretly grateful for.

He stepped out on the balcony, taking a seat next to the two.

"She's here." He told her. "But she's had a long day so I don't think she'll be ready to see you guys."

Gemma whined. "But I want to meet her, for real. In her non-doctor form."

Harry shook his head. "She'll be here tomorrow. Which reminds me, don't come in to wake me up, she needs a good rest."

Gemma sighed. "I can't wait to meet her, she sounds perfect."

Harry grinned. "She is." He stood up, pulling her in for a hug. "Goodnight Gemma." She hugged him back.

She called good night over her shoulder at him as he walked back inside. The bastard was still out cold on the couch and he resisted the urge to dip his finger in a glass of warm water and make him pee himself.

He snorted to himself, walking back to his room. The water was no longer running as he laid down on the bed. He wondered, not for the first time, how she managed to do everything she did. Being a doctor, having the life of someone else in his hands, Hell he could barely handle his own life.

The door opened and she walked out, hair soaking wet and curly, face void of all make up and a tired smile on her face. She had worn a pair of fuzzy pajamas and an old t-shirt this time. She was adorable. And he was really smitten.

"Feel better?" He asked her as she climbed in his bed.

She nodded, laying down so she was propped up on his many pillows.

"Want me to sleep on the floor?" He asked, he would willingly if that's what she wanted.

"No, I like sleeping next to you." She mumbled, eyes shut.

He tried to bite back the huge smile threatening to overtake his face and failed.

"Alright. You sleep with a fan?" He asked, getting out of bed.

"Can't normally sleep without one." She mumbled, eyes still closed.

"Me neither." He turned it on, flicking the light off as well.

He climbed back on his bed and helped her get under the covers. He liked seeing her this way, all vulnerable and like she needed someone for once.

"Thanks." She mumbled as she rolled to bury her head in his side. "You know I normally don't do this." She yawned. "But I really like you."

He tried to bite back another smile and failed again.

"I really like you too." He dropped a kiss on her head. "Now get some rest, superwoman."

She was already asleep, arm wrapped around his chest, legs intertwined with his. He joined her fairly quickly, the smile still on his face.

"Harry."

He grunted sleepily, hugging the softness closer to his body.

"Harry." She laughed. " I have to pee. "

His eyes blinked their ways open. Y/N was wrapped in his arms, looking back with a smile on her face. She looked a lot better.

"Good morning." He said, kissing her cheek.

"Good morning." She whispered back, closing her eyes as his lips made contact with her cheek.

He reluctantly let her go, hoping she'd come back if he didn't move. And she did, sliding back in his arms like she never left.

"What time is it?" He asked, nuzzling his head into her neck.

"Almost noon." She intertwined their feet.

"Wow." He muttered. "I feel like a teenager again."

She laughed. "What are we going to do today?"

"What do you want to do?" He rolled on his back, bringing her with him so she rested on his chest again.

"Something fun." She started drawing on his chest with her fingers.

"We can talk to everybody and see what they want to do, I mean as long as you're cool with hanging with them."

She nodded. "Yeah, that sounds good."

Harry nodded.

She sat up in the bed and stretched. He watched as her shirt lifted up revealing her freckle covered skin. Before he could stop himself his finger was tracing them. He had a thing with finding constellations in the stars and she had a ton on her.

She turned back with a small smile. "They're everywhere."

"I like them." He smiled back.

"Really?" She raised her eyebrows. "They're so ugly."

"No, they're cute." He grinned at her.

Before she could say anything her phone started ringing from her bag.

"Hello." She answered.

"A little warning would have been nice." An eyeroll.

"Yeah just give me a minute." She put her hand over the phone. " I have to go. My friend is standing outside my apartment waiting for me. " She gave him a sympathetic sort of smile.

Harry frowned. "Everything okay?"

She shrugged. "I think so, he tends to pop by unannounced because he thinks I have no life."

He. He resisted the urge to tell her to stay. "Alright, another time then?"

She nodded, reaching across the bed to place her lips on his cheek. "Yeah, I'm sorry, he's an idiot really."

"See you Thursday?"

She nodded, smiling as she grabbed her bag. "I really am sorry, tell Gemma I'm sorry I had to go."

Harry nodded, disappointment coursing through him. It was one thing to be ditched for hospital duties, it was another to be ditched for another guy. He tried to hold his jealousy and anger in.

"Of course." He got up to walk her out.

Her hand still covered the mouth piece and he wondered what it was that she didn't want this guy to hear.

"Thanks for cheering me up last night." She said as she slipped her shoes back on. "I'll see you Thursday."

And than she was gone. He sighed, running his hands through his hair.

"Harry." Gemma's voice called from the living room. "Did she just leave?"

He walked to her, collapsing on the couch next to her. Drake was nowhere to be seen.

"Yeah." He looked over at her. "Apparently one of her friends showed up at her apartment wondering where she was."

"Why do you sound so bummed?" She asked.

"It was a guy. I'd been thinking I knew a lot about her lately, we talk a lot and we're constantly texting but there's still stuff I have no idea about."

"Than ask." She pointed out like it was obvious.

"What if she doesn't want me to know." He looked over at her. " I think I really like her Gem, I don't want her to not feel the same way. "

"I think she really likes you too." She said, "What kind of person would come to a strangers house after a long shift at the hospital just to spend the night."

" I don't know. " He shrugged. "Maybe she just thinks we're friends."

"What's her last name." Gemma asked, pulling out her phone.

" Why? "

"We're going to look her up on social media, make sure she's single."

"Y/L/N." He responded. Even that was pretty.

She opened up Instagram and typed her name in.

"That's her." He pointed to the third one. @/yourinsta.

Her profile picture was of her and a blonde guy. His heart sank a little.

And there was a common feat in her pictures. A scrawny asian boy with glasses and a tough looking white haired guy with the same eyes as her.

"That's her brother." Harry pointed out to Gemma. "And I have no idea who that is."

"Her best friend." Gemma said, clicking on a picture. "Best friend since birth."

He didn't know what to think of that. Everyone said those made the best relationships but he could see the way she looked at him, like he was her brother. He sighed, adding this to the list of things he didn't know about her, a list that was longer than he wished it was

[tenpointsav]

just like heaven

After asking your friend Dustin to help find interviews for the school yearbook, you get a note from the last person you'd expect.

a/n: this is my first one-shot here on Tumblr! I've been obsessed with Eddie for weeks now and really felt the need to get this out of my system.

c/w: eddie being damn cute, making out

w.c: 3k

"Dude we aren't going to make this deadline." 

You roll your eyes, slamming the stapler into the bulletin board outside of the gym. Ever since she became editor of the Hawkins High yearbook, your best friend has been stressing out non-stop.

"Hannah, chill out. We're going to get it finished. I just want to get these pages in and it'll be good to go." 

You look at the flyer neatly stapled up, surrounded by others advertising piano lessons, cheerleading tryouts for next year, and senior prom. 

Wanted: Volunteers for interviews and photos for a spread in the Hawkins High Class of '86 yearbook. Topic is "music and lyrics". 

Hannah fluffs her hair, using the reflection in the trophy case as a mirror. 

"Why do you think we even need a music spread? We have a whole damn section on the marching band!" 

You both start walking away as the bell rang. Students file out of classes, their chatter and laughter filling the air. You dodge and weave through groups of jocks in letterman jackets and the band kids hauling huge instrument cases. 

"You told me I could do the last two pages on whatever I wanted. Music is a universal unifier, something people can have in common no matter their age or location." 

Hannah snorts as you reach the locker you shared. Hers was on the bottom floor, beside the science classes and she hated having to walk that far. 

"Maybe you should go ask one of your freshman cult members for help finding someone," she says with a smirk as she passes you a math textbook. 

As if summoned, a head of curly hair covered by a ball cap appears at your shoulder. 

"Hello ladies. Why, Hannah, you are looking remarkably lovely today," Dustin Henderson says with a toothy grin as Hannah groans 

"Dustin, just the man I wanted to see!" you exclaim, slamming the locker door. "I have another quest for you." 

You love Dustin like a little brother, babysitting him when you were in middle school. Your moms work together and something about his persistence and attitude always makes you smile. Lately he has been helping you with the yearbook, riding his bike around town to gather donations and take pictures in between playing Dungeons and Dragons with the Hellfire Club. He always invites you, saying you'd have a good time, but you were just too busy trying to survive your senior year. 

Dustin follows you and Hannah down the long hall to your calculus class.

"Can you find some students to interview for the last pages? The topic is music. I need musicians, people with good albums, maybe some kids who work at the record store on 10th?" 

He holds his hand out as you stop by the door of the classroom. 

"My services don't come cheap, my lady." 

You dig into your backpack, pulling out a crumpled five dollar bill. You slap it into his waiting palm. 

"Whoa, what's this shit? You gave me ten bucks last time!" Dustin exclaims. 

You groan, digging around in your bag. Coming up empty you think of the one thing he'd want more. 

"I'll let you and your little posse borrow my Nintendo."

Dustin squints his eyes at you. You throw your head back in frustration. God, he could be obnoxious. 

"Fine, with Duck Hunt."

He smiles widely, pumping his fist in the air. 

"Yes! Deal. Don't worry, I know just where to go." 

Dustin scurries off down the hall, backpack jangling on his back. A couple of girls shout disgruntled "hey"s as he bumps into them, throwing apologies over his shoulder.

"I mean it, Henderson! Someone good! Don't screw it up!" you shout over the chatter as his back disappeared around the corner. 

Hannah sighs, linking her arm through yours as you go into class. You straighten the collar of your blue oversized sweater from where it slipped off your shoulder. Mrs. Lattimore was a bitch and you didn't need a dress code violation. 

"You really think he's gonna come through?" she asks, dropping her bag to the floor before sitting down.

You nod, blowing your wispy bangs from your forehead as you slide into the first open desk beside her. 

"Of course. Dustin Henderson can't resist a challenge. And God help anyone who tells him no." 

After calculus and study hall where you tried your hardest to memorize trigonometric equations for your next exam, you walk to your locker to put away your things. Pulling out your denim jacket, a piece of paper folded in a triangle falls to the floor. It has the distinctly scribbled handwriting of Dustin, nearly illegible and in red pen. 

Basement, after school. Come alone. 

You snort, folding the paper and sliding it into the pocket of your high waisted jeans. Why did this kid make everything sound like he was an undercover operative? 

Only one period passes between now and then. The final bell rings and students stream out of the classes to their cars and buses. You throw your notebook and some pens into your shoulder bag and take the quick trip down to the school's basement. 

The only sound down here is the humming of the school's air conditioning and the boilers. You'd only ever been down here once to get art supplies

It creeped you out so badly you nearly sprinted back up the stairs. The hairs on the back of your neck are already standing up.

Dark doorways and corners surround you as you enter the only open door with a light. It's dimly lit, a large table in the center with chairs scattered around it. You raise an eyebrow at the ridiculous looking seat in the middle, almost like a throne. 

A threadbare couch is pushed up against the wall with a stereo in the corner. Cassette tapes are stacked against the wall, almost tipping over. You can't help going over to flick through them. Metallica, Iron Maiden, AC/DC, Joan Jett…

You hear something and turn, knocking a stack of tapes to the floor with your bag. A shape sits up on the couch in the darkness, startling you. You let out a scream, eyes getting wide. The other person also screams, high pitched enough that you'd laugh if you weren't so freaked out. In the chaos you trip backwards over a chair, ankle twisting to the side painfully. Your limbs flail out to catch anything to break your fall. 

Before you can hit the floor completely, a hand flies out and grabs your forearm. The silver rings on the fingers dig slightly into your skin through your jacket. Wide brown eyes look down at you, nervously scanning you from head to toe. You gulp a little, mouth going dry as you stare wide eyed at Eddie Munson, leader of the Hellfire Club.

Never in a million years did you expect this. You'd known Eddie for a while, sitting near him in some classes that he usually failed. People called him a freak, making him out to be some spawn of Satan. To you, he seemed sweet. He was just trying to make it through another school year like the rest of you. Dustin worshipped the ground he walked on and you always appreciated someone at the school looking out for your pseudo-brother. 

His hair is messy, as always. You can smell smoke and something spicy on his clothes. It's actually kind of nice, you think. He's in a black Black Sabbath t-shirt. Your eyes glance at the bat tattoos on the fair skin of the arm that's still holding yours.

"Holy shit, are you okay?" he asks, a worried look creasing his face.

Something buzzes in your brain as you glance at his long eyelashes and plump lips. Has he always been this good looking? You'd never had a chance to really look at Eddie in class, always worried about what the teachers had to say instead. Not that many boys were even on your radar to begin with. 

"Um, yeah, I think so." 

You stand upright a little more before wincing as you put weight on your ankle. 

"Here, sit down. I think I have something…" Eddie guides you to the couch before chaotically looking around the room. You bite your lip to hide the smile forming there.

With a small cry of triumph, Eddie comes back holding a can of Coke that he pulls from a small fridge. 

"It's not much, but it's cold…can't really keep ice in that thing," he says, crouching down at your feet. 

"It's fine…thank you. I can be really clumsy sometimes," you murmur as he starts to untie your high top Converse. 

"Wow, you seemed so graceful looking at those tapes. Could've fooled me," he replies with a smirk. Your face heats up at the dimples in his cheeks. 

Eddie slides your shoe off gently. You study his face as he holds the cold can to your slightly swollen ankle. His eyebrows furrow as if he could make you feel better through sheer will alone. He glances at you through long eyelashes. The corner of his mouth turns up as he catches you staring. 

"So I'm guessing Henderson sent you down here?

Something about the yearbook?" Eddie asks. 

"Yeah. If he'd have told me it was you though–" you start

"You wouldn't have come?" Eddie asks, hurt flashing through his eyes briefly. 

"No, no," you reassure him. "I would've met you somewhere besides a creepy ass basement."

Eddie grins widely again as he stands up. He takes a seat on the end of the couch, pulling your leg into his lap. He props your foot up and rests the cold can on the top of your ankle. 

"He's always acting like it's a spy mission…" he says with a look of exasperation.

"Yes!" You exclaim with a laugh. "Every time! He takes shit too seriously." 

His brown eyes glitter as you smile. You meet his glance and feel warmth in your chest that spreads to your face. Seconds pass as the only sounds are breathing and the heavy thud of your heart in your ears. You almost forget why you're even here. With a rapid blink, you force yourself to look away, reaching to grab your notebook. 

"I'm guessing that means you agree to be in the yearbook?" 

Eddie hesitates, but nods. You feel his thumb dance across the top of your ankle at the hem of your jeans, so light you'd think it didn't even happen.

"What do you want to know?" 

An hour and a half later, you have enough for your spread and then some. You only intended on getting a few quotes, but Eddie is a fountain of musical knowledge. Everything from The Beatles to Blondie, you go back and forth sharing favorite songs and most disliked artists. A debate breaks out over Bowie versus Freddie Mercury that has you crying laughing. You've never seen anyone find so much joy in talking about a subject like Eddie Munson and music. 

Pretty soon, you don't even feel the pain in your ankle. Eddie is now in the middle of the couch, turned towards you with a long arm thrown across the back. Your knees are pulled close to your chest, arms wrapped around your legs. You threw your jacket on the table about twenty minutes in, too warm from the energetic conversation. 

Whenever you speak Eddie looks at you so intently that it almost makes you embarrassed. There's not a single word or phrase that he misses, completely going against any of your previous opinions on his maniacal behavior. Unlike other guys, he actually cares about what you have to say. It might just be an act, but Eddie doesn't seem like the type to string you along. 

You're writing down notes of albums Eddie's mentioned and musicians he likes when you notice him from the corner of your eye. He's a lot closer than before, eyes on the collar of your favorite sweater. You notice the cool air of the basement across your skin and move to pull it up. 

"No, wait," Eddie says quietly. "Is that…do you have a tattoo?"

"Yeah…I turned eighteen a few weeks ago so my dad took me. He has tons from the Navy, so I wanted one of my own. I don't usually show it off though." 

Eddie's eyes get a little darker, flickering down to your shoulder and back to your face. 

"Can I see?" 

You nod before turning your back completely to him. You let the soft fabric of your sweater fall, exposing the paler skin of your shoulder blade. Your tattoo, a small blue and black butterfly, appears. Eddie's gaze is burning into your back and you remind yourself to take deep breaths or you might pass out. 

His fingertips graze the outline of each wing, as featherlight as the touch on your ankle earlier. Goosebumps break out on your skin and you hear Eddie breathe in through his nose and out again. 

"Christ, you're so… he murmurs. 

There's a hitch in his voice and you feel his hand pull away. You turn back, looking over. He's fidgeting with his rings, looking down at the floor. You realize he's nervous. Maybe he wonders when you'll get up and run away, freaking out. Or maybe you'll laugh at him for seeming desperate. Your hand goes out and you brush a lock of wavy hair from his cheek. Eddie's eyes close as he inhales. 

The air in the room seems thicker, a crackling across your skin. You trail your fingers down the soft fabric of his shirt to his bicep. Your index finger traces the dark lines of one of his tattoos. You can feel the flexing of the muscle under your nail and smile when the goosebumps appear. Eddie's eyes open and he stares down at you, but you don't look up. You're afraid you'll lose your nerve. 

"That's a wyvern, right?" you ask. 

Eddie's eyebrows raise a little before he smirks. 

"Yeah. How'd you know?"

You rub a thumb across one of the wings. 

"You realize who I used to babysit right? Had to watch those little dorks play all the time."

He grins broadly as he leans forward into your grasp. You raise your head, hand still on his arm. Eddie's close enough for you to count the faint freckles on his cheek and the stubble on his upper lip. 

The tip of Eddie's nose is almost touching yours as his breath fans across your lips. A shiver runs down your spine as his hand comes back up, tracing the skin of your collarbone. You silently thank Hannah for making you buy this sweater. 

"You know Henderson said you were too good for me," Eddie murmurs.

You laugh softly and place your other hand on his knee. The rough denim is torn and his skin feels hot to the touch. 

"I'll be the judge of that, Munson." 

Eddie's fingers curl around the back of your neck as he pulls you in. The kiss is slow, his lips soft and warm against yours. He groans as your tongue teases the edge of his bottom lip. Your mouth opens against his, the heat from his tongue filling your mouth as it slides inside. 

Eddie's other hand comes to your waist and pulls you close until your knees are in his lap. You whimper and throw your arms around his neck, feeling him smile. The only sound is your lips against his and heavy breathing. The cold metal of his rings against the skin of your waist makes you shiver as Eddie's long fingers drift around your side. 

The kiss becomes more frenzied, your hips tilting up slightly as the warmth in your chest spreads lower. You pull on his full bottom lip with your teeth earning you a hair-raising growl. Eddie releases your swollen lips to dip into your neck, sucking and kissing at the soft skin of your throat. You moan and bury your hands in his hair as he grabs your waist tighter. Your knees spread and your back arches, looking for any relief for the throbbing that is achingly apparent between your legs. 

Eddie's tongue swipes up to your ear where he nips at your earlobe. You grab his hand from where it's clawing at the skin of your hips and pull it towards your center. Pressing kisses to Eddie's neck as he pants against your cheek, his fingers toy with the buttons of your jeans. 

Suddenly, a loud clamoring comes from outside the door and Eddie sits up quickly. You push off the cushions of the couch as you do the same, frantically adjusting your sweater. Appearing at the door are Dustin and Lucas Sinclair, holding notebooks. 

"Hey Eddie….and Eddie's….friend?" Lucas questions as his eyes narrow in confusion. "I thought we were gonna work on the campaign but we can…"

"Nope!" you shout, hopping up from the couch. "We're done. Yep, got all I need for the yearbook." 

You put too much weight on your sore ankle and mutter. You'd forgotten all about it. Dustin looks suspiciously from you to Eddie, taking in your flushed cheeks and Eddie's messier than usual hair. You shove your notebook and pen in your bag and throw it over your shoulder. 

Eddie rests his elbows on his knees, bringing a hand to his chin as he watches you. Your wild eyes and breathless voice are something he doesn't want to ever forget. You're not sure if you're about to combust from horniess from being mauled by Eddie Munson or embarrassment for being almost caught by his little followers. 

"Hey, wait," Eddie's teasing voice stops you before you can fly out the door. "I'm gonna want to see that yearbook page. Gotta make sure you don't misquote me or anything." 

You turn, meeting his broad smile and your heart flutters at the sight of those damn dimples. 

"Of course. I, uh, have a shift tomorrow at the Family Video, but we can meet after to…go over things. See you at 7?" 

Eddie leans back as a heated look flashes across his face. That throbbing is never going to go away now. 

"See you then, princess." 

like, comment, and reblog my friends!

[weepingvoidpenguin]

One of Your Favorites

Jealous Bucky x Reader

Summary: You have an objective. Get Rumlow to confess. Simple enough, right? No. Aside from his usual condescending attitude towards you, Bucky has made it extremely apparent that he doesn’t think you’re capable of - well, anything, but especially not handling Rumlow. And yet, he is the biggest challenge of this entire ordeal.

Warning: T R I G G E R WARNING!! ATTEMPTED SA, DRUGS, language, light smut. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT READ IF SA WILL TRIGGER YOU. 

Word Count: 8.3k

   “We have good intel stating he’s working as a double agent for HYDRA. Selling information, exploiting tactics, even going so far as to tell them where we’ll be and when.” Natasha scanned the room, making sure she had everyone’s attention during the briefing. 

   You slouched back in your swivel chair and twisted to-and-fro slightly with your hands gripping the arm rests on either side. It took all of your willpower to act engrossed in her words. And you meant every single drop. You’d been paying attention, sure, but the only issue was the dominating presence two seats to your right and directly in your line of sight to Natasha. You rolled your chair to the left to clear the path for the third time, only for him to block your way without missing a beat. The growl that left your mouth was nearly involuntary. Nearly.

   How long would this man act like a child? Despite his graceful and seemingly unsuspecting movements, you were fully aware his placement was intentional. This was not the first, nor did you doubt that it would be the last, time that Bucky acted impudently toward you. Frankly, you’d grown bored of his behavior. It was the same thing everyday. He would act a nuisance during the briefings, speak over you whenever he had the chance, steal the limelight from you and invalidate any concerns or thoughts you shared. The whole charade grew tiring and he had been dancing on thin ice for months now.

   You averted your gaze from burning holes through the freshly washed, brown locks and switched your attention back up to the redhead. Thankfully, too, because you managed to catch the end of her sentence just as she locked eyes with you.

   “And that’s why Y/N is going to be the one to extract the information from him,” she finished.

   You blinked, “Wait, what?” 

   Bucky straightened his posture and threw a quick glance your way, “Yeah, what? She’s got no heat, couldn’t toast marshmallows if we gave her all day. She shouldn’t lead this, she wouldn’t know how,”

   “Well, tonight might be a good time to start learning, then,” Steve chimed in, throwing a wink your way. You smiled and appreciated his aid, not because you needed it but because at this point, you were seething and if you opened your mouth to defend yourself this meeting would go south, quickly. Luckily, Steve always believed you were capable of a great deal of things and knew you strove for more experience so any opportunity to lead or expand was one he thought you should take. 

   “Besides,” Tony spoke up, twirling a platinum pen between his fingers from across the table, “our little double-agent has always had the hots for Y/N so unless you’re gonna be the one to bat your eyelashes at him and get him alone in a room, Mr. Barnes, we have to use his own flaws against him.” He turned to face you and held up a hand, “Not to say that liking you is a flaw, you’re great Hot-Stuff but exploiting him is our best option indefinitely,”

   “Do I have to seduce him?” You huffed, crossing your arms over your chest and raising a brow towards Nat, trying your damned hardest to avoid the unmistakable glare the brown-haired super soldier was sending your way. 

   “The only thing you have to do is extract any information on him that you can. Get him a little drunk, catch him in a slip-up or two, take note of any inconsistent stories and be on your merry way,” she reassured, “How you manage to do that is up to you,”

   “Ooh, extortion,” Clint chirped up from the far back corner, his hands rubbing together maliciously around an arrow he pulled from his sheathe, something you noticed he did a lot when he was uninterested; be it a person, mission, or conversation.

   “No. Not extortion,” Steve shut it down and you chuckled at how Clint’s countenance fell into one of disappointment. 

   “Not yet anyway,” Natasha mumbled and you sighed as she walked around the room and handed each of you a folder with your individual objectives inside.

   “But he’s such a pervert,” you grumbled.

   “All the easier,” 

~

   The rest of the day was drudged with Nat while she taught the pertinence of body language (both yours and theirs), verbal ruses, and overall ensnarement. You bat your eyelashes until you were certain you would catch enough wind to fly away, smirked enough that your cheeks began to ache and raised your eyebrows ‘til you felt the impending wrinkles on your forehead. By the end of the drill you weren’t sure you were even going to make it to the company party from the migraine creeping its way on.

   “How’s the bait coming along?” His voice alone caused you to roll your eyes but you paid no mind while you rubbed at your temples and stood up alongside Natasha.

   “She’s not gonna be able to lie to me any time soon but she can flirt her way to whatever she wants,”

   “Benefits of targeting a narcissistic misogynist, they don’t think anyone can fool them.” Tony belted as he sauntered into the room with strawberries, offering them out to you while he munched on one.

   “She’ll still mess it up,” Bucky countered, “Make someone else do it,”

   You plucked the fruit off Tony’s tray and examined it, trying to figure out whether you were going to consume it or use it as a weapon.

   “I really appreciate your words of encouragement, James. Unfortunately, they’re not wanted, nor are they needed.” You bit into the fruit and glided towards the door, looking over your shoulder at the super soldier, “So unless you actually have something to contribute, I suggest you stay the hell out of my way while I get the job done,”

   Nat walked out behind you and handed you a tiny, skin-colored device meant to conceal itself and you placed it in your ear. 

   “The conversation is gonna be recorded so we can catch any inconsistencies. We’ll all be able to hear what you’re saying so tread on delicate waters but don’t be afraid to shake mountains if you have to,”

   You nodded and opened your door for her to enter your room knowing she’d want to help you get ready for the event. Natasha, shocking as it turns out, enjoys company while preparing for events. She would much prefer to be surrounded by people than be alone. You never had gall to ask her why that is. Or maybe you respected her too much to ask.

   An hour had passed, maybe two, but you enjoyed the silence between you both. There was no need to fill the empty quiet when it was so comfortable and welcoming. You two spoke without words at times and that was probably your favorite personal skill. Eventually, there came a knock on your door and you opened to find Wanda with her flat iron and make-up bag in tow. It’d long since been decided that your room was the gathering center.

   Wanda helped you finish touching up your outfit and you waited on your bed while they finished getting ready. Nat occasionally quizzed you on certain situations and how you should act depending on the tones and moods of the conversation. You tried to explain that you didn’t have difficulty reading a room but Nat tested you all the same. 

   “And if he puts his hand on your thigh?” She called out from your bathroom.

   “Then he loses it,” you practically sang in response.

   You were met with a flying hairbrush and laughed at the onslaught.

   “You’re not the only one with that mentality,” Wanda called out as well, her iron glossing over thin strands of hair.

   “Nat knows I can handle myself.” You sat up on the bed and went over to your closet to collect your favorite pair of shoes to go along with the formal attire Nat selected for tonight. “What a coincidence that we happen to have a company party the same night we have to extract information,” you hollered over your shoulder, moving aside terribly worn shoes while you scoured for the pair you had in mind.

   “This objective has been in the works for weeks now,” Nat released the tendril of hair from around the barrel and pinned it to her head so it could cool.

   “Wow, thanks for the heads up, then.” You gripped the desired pair and placed them beside your nightstand for later.

   “The plan wasn’t solid until we knew for a fact that Rumlow was coming. It’s a company party so it’s not mandatory but once he heard you were making an appearance, it didn’t take very much persuading,”

   You rolled your eyes and plopped back down on your mattress, “He’s so annoying, I doubt I can hold much of a conversation with him,”

   “Take a shot or two to ease your nerves, if he sees you drinking it’ll put him at ease too. He’ll be more inclined to drink,” Natasha recommended. “But don’t act too out of character. If you were always curt and short with him and suddenly you start acting over-friendly, he may get suspicious. He’s an idiot but he’s a paranoid one,”

   You nodded, taking a mental note to have a half-empty bottle in your grasp when Rumlow arrives. If he thinks you’ve already been drinking, he might also consider catching up. 

   “Y/N? Not uptight for once?” Wanda sarcastically questioned. “I can’t picture it,”

   “Oh, fuck off,” you grumbled and in turn received laughter from the two girls. “Besides, of all of us I’m by far the least uptight. Barnes takes the cake for that one,”

   There was a beat of silence that you didn’t register before you were met with a response.

   “Ya know, he’s not as bad as you paint him out to be.” Nat unpinned the curl from her head and moved on to the next section, “He’s got some serious loyalty and always willing to volunteer first for everything,”

   You lifted your head to stare at her reflection through the mirror, “What are you talking about? He’s annoying and irate and lacks a filter,”

   “Mmm, irate isn’t the word I would use,” Wanda countered, looking over to Natasha.

   Nat shook her head in response, “I’d lean more towards . . . over-protective,” 

  “Much better,” Wanda agreed.

   You squinted your eyes at their image and felt the corners of your lips turn downwards, “Over-protective? Since when are you two defending Barnes?”

   “We’re not defending him, per say.” Wanda glanced over to Nat, “We’re just trying to give you a fresh perspective,” 

   “You could give me a brand new pair of eyes and I’d still see him the same,” you retorted, now leaning on your elbows due to the strain on your neck. 

   They ignored the comment, “And he’s only annoying to you,”

   “You’re telling me he doesn’t annoy you at all?” You asked, an eyebrow raised.

   “More like . . . he doesn’t go out of his way to mess with us.” Nat applied a nude color onto her lips.

   “So you agree that he goes out of his way to irritate me,” you stated rather than asked.

   “That’s been made very apparent,” Wanda responded. “But you have to wonder why,”

   You huffed a little and sprawled back out on the bed just to result in staring at the ceiling above. If you looked hard enough your mind would create pictures from the chaos of the cracks and shapes began to form. Sometimes, when the night lay still and life seemed to dwindle at the edges of your reality, you could swear a familiar face fashioned together and your imagination ran wild with the images you’d see. Some that brought a warmth to your cheeks even now. 

   You shot up out of bed and shook the memories from your vision. Ugh. He haunts you even when he’s not actively tormenting you. How he’s managed to crawl his way so deeply within your skin you had no idea but you fought for control of your thoughts whenever you caught them slipping into that hellhole.

   “Or slipping into euphoria,” Wanda chimed in.

   “Wanda!” You scolded, crossing your arms, “Euphoria my ass,”

   “Yeah, he thinks so too,” she continued and you chucked the abandoned hairbrush back their way. 

   “Stay out of my head,” you jokingly sniped at her but was met with a low chuckle.

   “I didn’t even have to be in your head to know what you were thinking of,” Nat defended and caught your weapon of choice.

   “Are you guys done yet?” You rolled your eyes and stretched yourself out before swiping up the pair of heels you’d chosen and sliding them onto your feet.

   “Why? Are you in a hurry to see a certain someone?” Natasha teased and Wanda let out an eruption of laughter.

   “All right, I’m done.” You made a beeline for the door and threw it open, “Lock up when you’re finished!” You bellowed over your shoulder and made your way to the top floor of the building where all the parties are typically held.

   You didn’t run into anyone on the way up and you used that time to calm yourself, prying inch by inch away from the invasive thoughts that called for you in the darkest hours of the night. But, then again, maybe those tormenting thoughts weren’t that bad? You mean, he certainly IS handsome, very much so actually. And he has the most knee-wobbling smirk you’d ever come to know, not to mention those little tricks he does with his knives always manage to entrance you. God, did he know how to use a knife. 

   On more than one occasion had you caught yourself staring at how his hands encapsulated the hilt of the blade. How they clenched and relaxed, drawing out some of the more prominent veins on one of the extremities; of course, you were even more so enticed by the hand he hid as well. You’d imagined what it felt like to have such strong hands grip onto your thighs and coax you into spreading them open with just a few teasing touches here and there. You couldn’t fathom the front you’d put up would last very long, he was stellar at pulling reactions from you. He’d see you break under his caresses and he’d degrade you like he always did but this time it’d emit a different response from you, one that made you whimper and shake. At that, he’d probably call you a good girl, he definitely seems the type to switch between degradation and praise, and would press his mouth up just where you wanted it the most. You’d try your hardest to be quiet but damn the way that tongue moved against you and the way he’d pull you harder against his face at each sound of pleasure you let slip past your lips. He’d enjoy it, too. Eyes closed as he devours you, he likes to put on a show for you to watch. Give you a memory that’ll slick your thighs later that night if he hadn’t fucked you into a coma by then. He’d make you watch him and if you dared to close your eyes you’d earn a firm, cold smack on your ass. He knows you like when he uses temperature play. He growls a little too, he can’t help his innate behavior. Then, just as the accumulation is coming to its apex he’d pull away abruptly and kiss you straight on your mouth so you can taste yourself and that’d earn him another whimper which would result in another smack that leads to that cold metal trailing its way to your core and just as he pushes the tip of his finger inside-

   You cough and straighten your posture as the elevator door opens. When had you leaned up against the back wall of the elevator? Oh Gods, you could feel the slick at the apex of your thighs and you squeezed them together as inconspicuously as you could in fear that you were producing a . . . scent that would be rather difficult to conceal. But the slick only grew worse when you locked eyes with the person stepping into the elevator.

   Fuck.

   “That’s what you chose to wear?” He asked, a certain venom in his tone that immediately calmed the ache in your heat.

   “And what would you have me wear instead, Barnes?” You quipped back, your body facing forward as he took his place beside you in the cramped space.

   There was a beat of silence. Then another. “Not that,” he responded.

   “Well I’ll make sure to ask you next time since you have such impeccable taste,” you retorted, your eyes yet to abandon the sight of the closing doors.

   You weren’t sure of all the effects of the Super Soldier Serum that had been injected into Bucky and all that it heightened but you prayed to any God that would listen that his hearing wasn’t one of those things. You were too preoccupied with attempting to settle the hot pulse beating between your legs to worry about how loud your discomfort came across.

   “What do you look so nervous about?” Bucky’s gruff voice prodded. “You can’t possibly be nervous about the mission considering how big-headed you are,”

   You took a deep, long breath and held it to soothe you. Had you not been so previously preoccupied, you’d have given him hell for the insult. “I’m not nervous about that,” you sniped and rested back against the cool wall to satiate your burning skin before lifting your gaze to him only to find him already examining you.

   “Of course not, I just said that,” he retorted, bringing a gloved hand to his face to rub along his jaw, “there’s obviously nothing for you to worry about,”

   You scoffed, “And why is that, Barnes?” Cue the dramatic crossing of your arms. 

   “You’re smarter than Rumlow and significantly better trained. Overall, he really doesn’t hold a candle to your ability,” He paused for a second, his whole frame tensing until he remembered to relax, “But that’s not really saying much considering it’s Rumlow,” 

   You hadn’t noticed you raised your eyebrows until you felt your face fall, “Ah, there he is. You had me worried there for a second, Barnes. Thought you might actually try something new and display common decency for once,”

   A corner of his mouth turned up subtly and he shook his head. You trailed your gaze down to his hidden hand and stared long enough to burn a hole through the fabric.

   “If something’s bothering you, Dollface, go ahead and speak up,” 

   You weren’t sure what possessed you to say anything, especially knowing how touchy the subject was for him but the words left your mouth anyway, “I don’t know why you insist on hiding yourself,”

   He lurched his head back, your statement seeming to have a physical affect on the man and you mentally slapped yourself for saying anything.

   “I’m not hiding myself,”

   “But you are,” you interrupted, your thoughts coming out in pools of candor, “you aren’t your hand. You aren’t your past. You are you. Presently. You’re not the Winter Soldier anymore. That’s not even the same hand you had back then. It’s not tainted and neither are you. I say drop the gloves,”

   “And why would I care about what you say?” He growled, his eyebrows furrowed together and his neck tight in potential restraint.

   The elevator dinged and you looked towards the opening doors, “You don’t have to but they don’t look right with your suit either.�� You walked through the exit and sauntered over to the others who had already gotten the party started, leaving Bucky dumb-founded behind you. “I need a shot,”

   “Already ready,” Tony quipped up, holding the small glass in the air for everyone to behold before bringing his cheek to yours in mock welcoming, “This’ll up your tolerance for the next hour, try to get all your drinking done within that time-frame,”

   You pulled away with a warm smile after faux kissing his cheek, “Finally!” you displayed and threw the liquid back in one swift motion, your face scrunching together against your will.

   “Yeah, she’s got a kick to her,” he mumbled and handed you a fruity drink to chase it down with. 

   You went around and said hi to everyone as you recognized most of those present. You made small chatter with those lesser known and drank the liquid in your hand significantly quicker than you’d like to. You excused yourself after you finished the drink and walked over to the bar, scanning the room as you were handed another glass. No Rumlow in sight.

   You headed towards the foosball table and gripped the handles after setting the beverage down on the counter beside you. You flinched as a reflection of light caught your eye and at first you thought your glass was the source. Until your eyes fixated on the reflection’s actual origin. To your far right, and up a few steps you found Bucky conversing with Steve, a dull light emitting from his hand. Not a glove in sight.

   “So, where’s your boyfriend?” Sam inquired when he filled the opposing spot.

   You rolled your eyes, “Bucky’s not my boyfriend,”

   “Bucky?” Sam’s tone chirped up teasingly, a knowing look wearing on his face.

   Your grip tightened around the handles and you slowly pulled away to throw the little white ball through the circle, your hands immediately twisting the miniscule players around. Your eyes shot back and forth, your sight never leaving the darting sphere. Sam still managed to win the first point.

   “Ha!” He shouted in triumph, bringing his finger up as if to scold you, “Don’t think you got away with that comment either, Y/N,”

   “What comment?” you questioned and gulped most of your drink before slamming it back down on the table.

   You heard your earpiece come to life with quiet static and you tried to keep your face masked. Rumlow had entered. Not a surprise either, the party was finally starting to pick up now.

   Sam threw the ball in and you turned the players meticulously this time, brute strength hadn’t helped you earlier so maybe you should take it slow. Steve made his way over to the table and threw his drink back, the liquid trickling down the side of his face before he wiped it away. Sam won the second point.

   “I play winner,” Tony chimed, standing beside Steve.

   You made a point to catch up and now you two were tied at three each. 

   “Best out of five?” You proposed, quirking an eyebrow at Sam.

   “If you didn’t want to play anymore you could’ve just said that,” he teased and you smirked at him as Tony made a subtle show of handing you another drink and you finished your second. “Loser takes two shots?”

   “Deal.” You nodded, knowing you didn’t have much of a choice as a small crowd began to form around you two. Rumlow amongst them. 

   Your jaw dropped when Sam shot the ball directly into your goal as soon as he’d let the ball go.

   “What the fuck?” You shouted, “No fair! That doesn’t count!”

   Thor erupted in laughter to your right and you blinked slowly, staring at the gargantuan man. 

   “It most certainly does,” Sam shouted back, his grin practically touching his ears.

   “Sam, take it easy on her,” Bucky muttered from beside him, quickly averting his gaze from yours and his expression loosened, “The brat hates losing,”

   “Brat?” You snarled.

   Bucky took a swig of his beer, watching you the entire time and you reeled back the fire beginning to form in your chest just to bring your drink up to your lips and chug the entire thing down. You handed it over to Tony who left to replace it. 

   “Last point,” Sam stated, “It’s not too late to quit now,”

   You shook your head and blinked away the feign distortion you were supposed to have. “Just play the ball,”

   “Don’t say I didn’t warn you,” he teased and threw the ball in. 

   You wanted to win. Desperately. But you had a character to play tonight and she was supposed to be drunk. So you hit your hand against the corner of the table just as Sam happened to make the winning point. You grumbled and threw him a glare when Tony broke through the crowd.

   “Coming through,” he shouted, handing two small glasses to you while you gripped your knuckles in pain. “Noooo, you’re not getting out of taking these. C’mon, take your punishment,”

   “Yes, Daddy,” you grumbled and cringed at your own words when the realization hit you. Whatever. You were supposed to be drunk, anyway. 

   “Daddy?” Tony quipped and pulled the drinks back towards himself, “Maybe you should be cut off,”

   “What?” You argued, leaning slightly on the table with your hand and snatching the drinks from Tony’s hold, effectively spilling some on yourself. “See?” You lifted up the half empty shot glass, “This barely counts as a shot,”

   “I’ll get her a new one,” Rumlow offered and disappeared before anyone could argue. 

   “She really doesn’t need another-” Bucky tried to interject and take the shots from you but you twisted around and chugged down the one full glass.

   Water.

   You looked up at Tony and his smirk was barely noticeable. But you could tell. Bucky nearly ripped the other drink from you but Tony blocked his path and you exaggerated your next drink as Rumlow broke back into the crowd, shot in tow.

   “Here.” Rumlow’s calloused hand held the drink up above you and you stared at him with a questioning look. “Open,” he ordered and the fire burning in your chest fought to destroy everything in its vicinity. You bit your lip in refrain but tossed your head back and opened your mouth.

   Static broke over your earpiece. Don’t drink that! Wanda’s voice erupted.

   Your eyes widened as the liquid made its way down but you coughed hard to stop whatever you could. 

   Why? Steve’s voice came through right after.

   You choked on the liquid and shut your eyes at the way it burned its way down. You reached your hand out to grab someone’s drink to ease the burning and grasped a tall glass and tossed it back. The burning didn’t ease up and you felt a hand rest on your back.

   “Are you okay?” Rumlow’s voice rang out and your skin nearly recoiled from the contact, “How about we get you some water?”

   You looked up at him when the burning subsided minimally and nodded your head, letting him lead the way to the bar. He parted the crowd and someone took step right behind you to follow when the presence suddenly died out abruptly. You turned around to check who it had been and found no one.

   Why? Steve asked again.

   Where’s Wanda? Bruce broke through.

   You lifted your head and flitted your gaze around the room until you found the familiar Sokovian on the couch, laying down with her eyes closed. You pulled away from Rumlow but his grip on your hand tightened and his steps grew in haste. You whirled your head to yell at him but the way the room swayed with the movement cause you to shut your mouth in surprise. 

   Didn’t Tony say you would have a higher tolerance?

   “Couch...” you muttered, pointing over your shoulder just in case your target was curious enough to ask but the message was delivered.

   Rumlow hoisted you up onto the bar stool and stood on your open side, using his body to keep you from falling over. Or to cage you in.

   “I don’t feel good,” You rested an elbow on the countertop and held your head up.

   “I can’t imagine you would. You’ve been chugging those drinks like they’re water.” Despite that, Rumlow motioned to the bartender and asked for two more.

   You giggled and your head lulled forward with the action. You let Rumlow catch you from tumbling over. Why did your body feel so heavy? Not to mention the way everything around you dazed about. You couldn’t catch a single action, let alone attempt to read Rumlow’s body language. But you did happen to notice the way his eyes searched the room before coming back to you.

   “You okay?” You rested your forearm against his chest and pushed slightly to allow yourself a better view of his face.

   A small smirk, “Am I okay? What about you?”

   You smacked your lips and brought the ice cold glass to your lips. That’s not water. “I’m doing reeaalllyy good,” you drawled.

   Rumlow chuckled and pushed you deeper into the chair, “I can tell.” He took a sip, his attention never faltering from your body, “Just be sure to pace yourself from here on out,”

   You made a show of cocking your head to the side and letting a smile sprawl onto your face as you studied him. 

   “What?” he questioned, a curious lift in his brow.

   You shook your head gently and kept your gaze on him over the brim of your glass, “You’re just . . . not what I was expecting,”

   “And what were you expecting?” 

   Don’t forget to bat your eyelashes. “Worse,”

   “Sorry to disappoint,” he jeered, his attention once again cast throughout the room before centering back on you.

   You followed his action but quickly came to the conclusion that moving any pace faster than a sloth was going to make you nauseous and you could barely keep a thought together. Your stomach began to rise in your chest and the fear seized your throat shut. Why couldn’t you hold onto a thought for longer than a second? It was like you were aware of your lack of consciousness but could do nothing about it because any thought or bout of panic phased through just as soon as it arrived.

   “What are you so tense for, Rumlow? You know you’re not currently on the clock, right?” You teased, your head leaning on your shoulder as you spoke.

   He brought his drink up to his lips and finished it off in three gulps, “I’m not tense. It’s just hard to turn it off sometimes,”

   You nodded slowly and pushed your drink towards him, “Relax. You know everyone here,”

   He shook his head and placed your drink back in front of you before asking for another beer.

   “And two shots!” You shouted to the bartender, throwing two of your fingers high up and instantly regretting how fast you’d done it.

   “Are you trying to get me drunk?” He asked you, a side smirk beginning to form.

   You placed your finger over your lips and hushed, “Shh, I won’t tell if you don’t.” You dragged your lower lip down and his eyes fixated to commit the scene to memory. “Besides, I always feel dumb if I’m the only one drunk,”

   He motioned to the rest of the party, “Believe me, Sugar, you’re not the only one enjoying yourself,”

   “But are you?” 

   “Am I what?” 

   “Enjoying yourself?” 

   Your skin crawled when he placed his rough hand on your barren thigh, “Absolutely,”

   Don’t forget what you’re here for. Don’t let the objective slip. Gods, how the fuck were you supposed to retain anything when you were so sleepy? And why was it so warm?

   “Hot,” you mumbled, fishing around in your glass for an ice cube to rub on your face.

   “Thank you,”

   You threw your head back in laughter and nearly earned yourself an up-close and personal view of the floor had Rumlow not wrapped an arm around your waist and held you steady. Once he was certain you weren’t going to toss yourself onto the ground, he parted your legs and stood between them to keep you rooted to your seat.

   All the movement had you spinning and you white-knuckled Rumlow’s cotton shirt to keep yourself grounded to something, anything. Red warning lights were firing up in your chest and you tensed with the way your body buckled to the panic coursing through you. Your heart pounded in your ears and danced across your skin, lighting it on fire and making the room too stuffy to bear. Please, no. Not now. Focus. Snap out of it. Come back, stay back. Your breathing hitched and you looked down at the sensation crawling its way up higher on your thigh. Too hot. Everything was too hot, if you didn’t get out of this now you would never-

   “Vision!” You cheered, happy to see your friend.

   The presence on your thigh recoiled slightly.

   “I’m taking Wanda to her room, seems she’s had a bit too much to drink,” Vision informed and you’d only just then noticed the body in his hold.

   “Wanda!” You smiled, admiring her peaceful features as she slept in his arms. You poked at her cheek then jerked your gaze back up to Vision. “What? Wanda doesn’t drink,”

   She’s not acting, Sam’s voice erupted in your ear and you flinched at the sound. 

   Vision’s eyes went from you to Rumlow then back to you slowly, “Y/N . . . are you okay?”

   You beamed at him and slowly brought up your thumb. “Good,” you responded.

   You followed Vision’s gaze back up to Rumlow and smiled at the agent beside you. You guess he’s kind of cute. In a strange, unsettling way.

   “She’s had a lot to drink, so we’re just trying to slow down the pace. Aren’t we, Y/N?” Rumlow looked down at you.

   You nodded fervently, “Yup!” 

   Vision hesitated but knew he didn’t pose much of a threat with Wanda in his arms unconscious, so he quirked a smile and walked towards the hall.

   Someone get to Y/N, something’s not right, Vision ordered and you lifted your head up to find him. You could have sworn he just left.

   “Here.” Rumlow handed you a glass, “Drink this, it’ll cool you down,” 

   You stared at the glass in his hold and looked up at him, “You drink it first,” you slurred, holding your finger up at him.

   He cocked his head to the side but took a swig of the drink and you watched it go down his throat. You shrugged and grabbed at it.

   Do not drink that, Nat ordered from somewhere and you looked around in wonder at who she was yelling to.

   Bucky, Sit down! Steve growled.

   Like hell, responded a voice you knew all too well.

   Your smile grew and you looked through the crowd, “Bucky!” You feverishly called, completely expecting to see him before you. Rumlow’s head lifted instantly, his eyes scouring the area.

   “I’ve got this, Pretty Boy,” Tony hastily spoke, “How ya doin’, Hot Stuff?” He interrogated and you reeled at the tone.

   “Quite well, thank you,” you responded tenaciously and attempted to take a swig of the drink in your grasp.

   Tony’s hand shot out and covered the top, slamming the cup back down on the counter and effectively getting the drink all over your dress.

   “What the fuck?” You tried to shout but the words came out heavy and required too much energy to speak.

   “You’ve had enough for tonight,”

   “It’s just water,” Rumlow defended but Tony paid him no mind.

   Your jaw dropped open and you glared at the older man. Who the hell did he think he was? Tony’s stare burned through your skull and despite your irritation, you couldn’t help but wonder why he was so pissed.

   “Are you mad at me?” You drawled, lulling your head to the side.

   “No,” he responded curtly. 

   “Am I being too loud or something?” You pushed. You couldn’t imagine you were any louder than any other drunken bastard at this party.

   “No,”

   Get her out of there or I swear to God I will, his voice hissed into your ear.

   Your eyebrows rose slightly in excitement, “Mmm, Bucky,” you smiled and Tony nodded.

   “’Mmm, Bucky’ is right. Wanna go see him?” Tony offered, sticking out his hand for you to take.

   You fell forward into Rumlow’s chest but shook your head furiously none the less, “For what? So he can tell me I’m horrendous at my-”

   Oh shit. Your job. The job.

   If only your body didn’t feel so heavy and your mind so light.

   You pushed off Rumlow’s chest and glared at Tony, “I can handle myself,” you insisted, a new sort of sober tone making its way through that caused him to do a once-over. “I know what I’m doing,”

   “How many drinks have you had?” Tony challenged and you fell silent.

   Then you felt a tap, and another and a few more.

   “Six,” You said, hoping you’d counted right.

   Tony, don’t you even fucking consider it, Bucky threatened.

   “You could at least change, recuperate and then come back,” Tony offered and you sighed a breath of relief before nodding.

   “Deal,” you agreed, “I’m hot anyway,”

   Tony gave you one last glance before turning around and blending into the crowd on the other end of the room.

   You looked up to Rumlow who’s gaze was still locked on the sea of people, “Don’t you wish you’d taken that shot now?” you tried to jeer, every last word bringing you deeper and deeper.

   “Are they always that intense?” He questioned, not turning his attention to you.

   “They can be over-bearing,” you admitted, hand grabbing the water from earlier and pressing it up against your forehead, “They consider me the baby so they’re always criticizing and suffocating until I just wished they’d disappear.” You took a gulp, “Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate the family and I like that I have a cause but . . . they don’t let me do anything. It’s exhausting,”

   You let out a long breath and smeared the condensation from the glass onto your chest. Rumlow studied you then, not just your body but your reaction. He was watching how you dropped your shoulders at the confession and how you faced your back to them to block them out. 

   You plastered your torso on the countertop and tried to slow your heartrate down. You couldn’t be the only one here unfathomably hot.

   “Why is it so fucking hot?” You questioned, fanning yourself weakly.

   “There are a lot of people around,” Rumlow offered, “how about we go somewhere else? Tony did say you had to change,”

   You peered up at him through half-lidded eyes and meekly groaned in compliance. “Fine,”

   You lifted yourself away from the counter and gently placed your feet on the floor. You’d touched the ground faster than anticipated. Had the ground always been so close?

   “Don’t worry, I gotcha.” Rumlow threw an arm around your waist and helped you trudge towards the elevator.

   Where the hell are you going? Bucky yelled and the sound of shuffling could be heard from his end.

   We can’t let you leave with Rumlow, Y/N. We’re not even sure you’re acting anymore, Sam stated.

   Rumlow pressed the button when you couldn’t muster the strength to do it yourself. The level that your room was on lit up and the doors began closing. You thought you saw Rumlow wave at someone but the mock smile on his face didn’t make it seem like a warm good-bye.

   Your legs had all but given out by the time the elevator reached your shared floor. 

   “Heavy,” you muttered, letting Rumlow carry your weight fully.

   “I know, Sugar. We’re almost there,” he soothed and you conceded to the fatigue wearing you down.

   Your head hung low and your arm dangled uselessly at your side. The familiar sound of your door sliding open caught your attention but you did nothing. You couldn’t. 

   “How . . . know . . . my room?” You questioned, each word causing you to pull from an empty well of energy.

   “I’ve been here before.” Rumlow tossed you onto the bed and sprawled you out.

   “Oh. Ok.” You tried to turn on to your side but strong hands gripped down onto your ankles.

   Rumlow sighed and slipped the heels off your feet, examining the pair like he wanted to wear them. You extended your feet until you felt every muscle in your leg stretch to its capacity and let out a groan of pleasure at the release. Those shoes hurt so bad.

   “You seem . . . intelligent, Y/N.” Rumlow dropped your shoes onto the floor and slithered to the side of your bed, standing beside it with his hands tucked into his pockets.

   A bead of sweat trickled down your forehead, “Hot . . .” you croaked and he nodded.

   “You’re right. It is getting kind of hot.” He brought a hand up to his neck and ripped off the tie hanging around it.

   Get the fuck out of my way, a growl erupted in your ear.

   We’re going with you, Buck, Steve responded before knocking something over.

   “So, what I have a hard time understanding is. . . why you’re here?” 

   You groaned a weak ‘huh’ but even that didn’t sound right.

   “You’re good at what you do, you finish every mission successfully and yet you’re underappreciated.” He took a seat at the foot of your bed and placed one of your legs into his lap, “Why do you allow them to treat you like that? We wouldn’t,”

   The shuffling in your earpiece halted.

   “We?” 

   He began to massage your calf and brought your knee up to his lips, peppering light kisses on it. “We could use someone with your skillset, babe. We’d take real good care of you,”

   The shuffling started again.

   Rumlow had made his way onto your thigh at this point and you let out an involuntary moan when he skimmed over a delicate part on your inner knee.

   “Ya like that?” he questioned but didn’t wait for a response. He brought a hand up to his temple and grabbed the earpiece. You figured he just hadn’t taken it out from his earlier shift but when he pulled it apart, you understood why he always kept it on him.

   “Flash . . . drive earpiece?” Your weak tone tilted a little. “W-why tell . . .”

   “I figured I’d give you the option to leave since you seem so . . . suffocated. If you said yes tonight then I would remind you tomorrow. If you didn’t,” he chuckled, “well, you wouldn’t remember anyway.” His hands trailed to your mid-thigh and you squeaked. “I’m impressed though, I’ve never given anyone else as much as I’ve given you tonight. The drug usually works so quickly on others, but not you. It’s kind of hot, actually,”

   Sick fuck, Natasha growled through a ragged breath.

   The world around you was slow or maybe it was you that was slow? You couldn’t tell, honestly. But when Rumlow moved as if he could predict your actions before you could make them, you wondered whether you were moving at all.

   “Don’t worry, it’ll be over soon,” Rumlow sighed.

   You shook your head, or thought you did but despite the way your body was live-wired, it remained still against all desire. 

   Fight. Move. 

   You managed to push your legs shut but his hand slithered between and spread them open similar to opening a door, but this required much less force.

   “Kill,” You threatened and the sinister smile that crawled its way onto Rumlow’s face was vile enough to sink your heart into your stomach.

   “Kill is fucking right.” Someone snarled and your door was ripped from its hinges.

   Rumlow’s hand jerked away from your body and Bucky seized his open palm, intertwining their fingers and pushing Rumlow’s so far back that they touched the back of his own hand. The cracks were sickening onto themselves but had you not been so weak you would’ve turned from the sight altogether. You really couldn’t fathom how his fingers were still attached at all.

   “Lay another hand on her and you won’t be able to use it again.” Bucky spit.

   Despite Rumlow’s pain, the sinister smile remained sprawled on his face, “You should’ve heard the noises she made,”

   Bucky’s grip tightened and the bones in his palm broke next, “I did,”

   Natasha flew in right behind Barnes but completely dismissed the two and headed straight for you with a needle in hand. Your eyes shifted from the needle to Nat’s face and back again until she stabbed it into your upper arm. Ouch. 

   “Wha-”

   “Shh,” Natasha hastily hushed, “Keep your strength, you should be back to normal soon,”

   Steve came behind Nat and scooped you up to lead you out of the havoc going on in the room. Nat turned her focus to Bucky and reached over to grab the earpiece from Rumlow. Who knows if his nose will ever heal back normally. You held one finger in the air as Steve stepped over the splintered door.

   “Goddamit, Y/N,” Steve huffed, jogging towards the elevator and pressing the floor that led to the infirmary.

   “We won,” you croaked out, a small smile on your face and Steve shook his head.

   “I’m never going to hear the end of this,” 

   Steve looked you up and down for bruises but couldn’t find any and you promised you weren’t lying to him when you told him Rumlow did not get very far in his ‘advances’ at all. You had to swear the mid-thigh was the worst that it came to. 

   Bruce was the one that took a few blood samples and made sure everything was reversing back to normal. Apparently, as soon as Rumlow took you to the bar Tony handed Banner the shot glass that Rumlow gave you and Banner ran analysis on it. The cure was pretty easy to find.

   After being given strict orders to lie down for the next hour or so, it had been decided that Rumlow was to be turned in considering all the evidence required to make the arrest was in the flashdrive and everyone was to gather together for a ‘family night’. Whatever the hell that meant.

   You were in the middle of debating which movie to pick with Steve when the infirmary doors flew open.

   “Where is she?” Bucky nearly shouted upon seeing Bruce.

   “That’s my cue.” Steve stood up just as Bucky rounded the corner, “If you need anything me and Banner will be right over there,”

   You smiled and thanked him then turned your attention to the super-soldier who just arrived at the foot of your bed.

   He didn’t say anything for a while, just looked at you. No, not really. Not at you but through you. A few painstakingly slow seconds went by that way.

   “You owe me a new door,” you joked, a half-smile on your face.

   “Are you okay?” He asked, finally registering your presence.

   You nodded slowly, “I am,”

   Then a few more seconds.

   Bucky turned his gaze down to his hands, both of them barren and on display for the world to see, before shifting his weight between either foot, “Did he- did he touch you?”

   “Not really. Just really liked my legs for some reason,” your attempt at another quip didn’t reach Bucky. He stared back up at you waiting for an answer, an honest one. You sighed, “The damage is more mental,” you admitted, now you were the one not able to look up, “I didn’t like being in this altered state of mind. It’s invasive and . . . scary. He could’ve done things, much worse things but it never got that far or that bad. It was more realizing that I wasn’t completely conscious or present and having that state of mind be taken advantage of, that mostly frightened me. Ya know?”

   “More than anyone,” he answered immediately.

   You looked back up towards him, finally making eye contact, “But I’m fine now, really. Just a little spooked. Steve wants to do a movie night tonight and I would actually prefer that over being alone.” Your eyes fixated on the way his hands clenched and unclenched on the bar by your feet, “If I’m alone then I’ll get stuck in my head about it. Besides, I consider this a hard victory with a few bumps in the road,” 

   He chuckled, lulling his head a bit, “You’re too stubborn for your own good,”

   You shrugged, “Maybe. How’s Rumlow?”

   Bucky hissed and moved over to the side of the bed where he took a seat, “He’s unconscious. And has a hand that he’ll never be able to use again. But other than that, he’s fine,”

   You chuckled and Bucky watched how the laugh met your eyes. He liked that look on you. It was one of his favorites.

   “Why are you looking at me like that?” You questioned once it fell silent between you two again.

   “You called me Bucky earlier,” he remembered.

   You scoffed, “I call you Bucky all the time,”

   “Not to my face,”

   “Not to your face,” you agreed, a teasing smile dancing on your lips and Bucky had one that mirrored yours. 

   “It was nice. Hearing it, I mean,” he admitted and a wave of warmth made its way to your face.

   “I see your hands are exposed,”

   He looked down as though he weren’t aware that he’d taken off his own gloves, “These bad boys? A friend of mine reminded me that I’m not my past. I’m my present. Why hide my growth?”

   You twiddled your thumbs together, “She sounds smart,”

   Now he scoffed, “Oh, it wasn’t a girl, it was some old buddy of mine.” He quirked up a brow, “Unless the person being a girl would make you jealous because in that case it was most definitely a girl,”

   You fought against the natural tug at the corners of your mouth, “Is she at least pretty?”

   “Stunning,” 

   “Smart?”

   “Genius,”

   “Good at her job?”

   “Amongst the best,”

   “Then consider me jealous, Barnes,”

   Bucky chuckled and you watched how the laugh met his eyes. You liked that look on him. It was one of your favorites.

[subwaysurf45]

Love You to the Moon and Back

summary: Bucky notices you’re feeling down after a bad injury, he does his best to help.

words:  3817

warning: depressive episode, doctors, mainly fluff!

pairing: Bucky x Reader 

Masterlist!

Bucky could tell you were getting bad again. 

And it hurt him to see you like this but it always happened after a big mission, your job was traumatizing and it took a toll on all of you. Bucky knew he had his days but he also knew when you finally let yourself slip it was really bad. 

You were a very headstrong person, you didn’t like letting people see your weaknesses or just you being hurt in general. So it sucked when you had broken your shin and witnessed a school of kids get blown up by a bomb, maybe sucked is an understatement but it was what you always said. 

You had pretended to be a teacher because there was supposed to be a hit on most teachers at a private school, so when the school blew up before everyone was out of the building- including you -it left the memories very crystal clear. There was no way of saving everyone so you saved yourself, and the feeling of selfishness had never been more apparent than right now. You were lying in bed with a cast on your left leg, your left leg was on top of the duvet while the other leg was under. 

A tank top and shorts was all you wore even though you were cold. A pillow was placed between your legs down by your shins to keep the injured one elevated, Bucky had stuck it there the last time he came in to check on you. 

Speaking of Bucky, he walked into your shared room in the compound. 

“Hey, sweetheart,” Bucky cooed as he gently opened and closed the door without making any sound, you had become hyper-aware to sound and light so a loud noise or a flash of a camera could send you into a state of hysterics. Bucky sat himself at the edge of the bed at around your midsection, you were lying in the middle and facing him. You barely said hello, all you could muster was a groan that had the same rhythm as the word hello. “How’s my girl doing?” Bucky rubbed your thigh very carefully. 

It was so obviously a rhetorical question, you were absolutely shit and he knew it. You both just stared at each other and Bucky seemed to get the message, he nodded and looked down. The room was so dark from the lights being off and the curtains being pulled you barely registered that Bucky had a plate of cheese, apple slices, and crackers. Bucky saw you turn your nose up and he knew you would, you had been like this for what felt like weeks. 

“You have your two appointments today, you wanna use the crutches or the wheelchair?” Bucky asked as he gently caressed your thigh, a little hum came after a few sections to clarify this wasn’t rhetorical. 

“I don’t know,” you mumbled into your pillow. 

“Okay…” Bucky held onto the last syllable, he glanced over to the wheelchair and crutches. “How about you have a little snack and then when you got food- and I’ll get water -you can make your choice. You also know you can switch and I’ll be glad to grab it for you, alright?” he did a few quick pats on your thigh before setting the plate down on the bedside table, he grunted as he stood up and stuck his arms slowly beneath you. All Bucky did was sit you upright to eat, you had gotten better at eating and now didn’t need motivation to eat but just a little push at the beginning to keep going after the first bite. Bucky also found if he ate a few pieces from the plate you’d be more inclined to eat the rest. 

“Thanks,” your voice was low and barely audible. 

“No need, pretty lady,” Bucky got right beside you and grabbed the plate, he placed it between you and let you choose the first piece. “So, you’re at the doctor at two and then Doc at three-ten, do you wanna nap between for a little or for a while after?” he just took a cracker and plopped it into his mouth. 

“No, no nap between, I wanna sit outside Doc’s office like before to make sure I’m not late.” You mumbled and stacked a piece of cheese on an apple slice. Doc was your therapist that was assigned to you a little while before your injury, Bucky wasn’t the only one who got nightmares and manic episodes; you probably got them more. Bucky knew he couldn’t go into your therapy meeting, he could physically go in but it went against his morals, this was your time to be alone and completely vulnerable to a human that you only see one or twice a week, he didn’t want you to sugar coat anything just because he wa sitting there. 

Bucky nodded and hummed before pulling the notebook out of the bedside table’s drawer, your combat backpack which you used for everything between missions and a picnic in the park was curled over itself in the corner of your room. Bucky picked it up and headed back to bed to let it rest there as he packed. He did this when you weren’t injured, Bucky had sadly realized your memory was a little shot from the amount of bootleg brainwashing and head injuries. You’d constantly forget about appointments or missions, or even the date. 

“Baby, I told you, your birthday is today, that’s why I got flowers.” Bucky said and pointed to the counter with the bright flowers on it. 

“No…” you rubbed the front of your head. “My birthday isn’t today, I forget the day- but it’s not today, I swear.” 

He slid in your journal that you used to write down lists and memories, you had used a guitar pick as your bookmark even though you can’t play anymore. Sometimes when you’d show up to a therapy session you’d forget what you wanted to say, it hurt him when he’d walk you there and you’d be saying the list of things under your breath with your eyes closed. Nightmare, mom, picking my nails, ankle, nightmare, sand, flowers. 

“We gotta go soon, anyways, wanna get ready for the day?” Bucky softly asked, there was no nice way of telling your loved one they needed to shower. 

“Sure,” you looked down at the plate and grabbed the last of it before getting up, the apple and cheese was just curled in the palm of your hand, as you walked over you shoved it all into your mouth because you knew you had to shower and you didn’t like soggy cheese. 

“I’ll keep packing your bag, and I’ll fill a water bottle for you.” Bucky had been your human crutch as you walked to the bathroom, you had an itch down in your cast that was bugging you. 

Tony had wanted to add tech to the shower to help you stand because putting pressure on your left leg hurt after three minutes and seven seconds- not that you were timing to see how long you could go without collapsing. You had said no to tech and just asked for a bar, Bucky even thought it would be cool but it was all up to you. 

Bucky helped you slip out of your clothes before leaving you be, he knew he would have to check on you periodically because you were too stubborn to ask for help if you had fallen or couldn’t get in the shower. You gripped onto the metal bar and helped yourself slip in, you turned the water on right away. 

You liked warm, long showers. You just let the water hit your skin as you stood in front of the shower head, the water pressure was high so you let the bullets hit your face when your eyes were closed. Your hair got wet as you stood there, you reached for the bottle of shampoo and expected it to be where it always was. The was getting into your eyes and when you squinted to see where the bottle was everything was double, as you reached for the bottle you had actually reached for the fake double and knocked the bottle off the ledge. A loud thump rang through the bathroom and it sounded like a bomb. 

There was one second of silence before you heard scrambling from outside the bathroom door, all at once you could see the door swing open by its shadow through the curtain. The curtain was pulled back so hard a couple of ringlets holding it up were ripped off. 

“Baby?” Bucky yelled before he registered you were standing upright. “What?” he breathed heavily, he was completely expecting you to be passed out on the floor with a cracked skull. 

“Shampoo bottle,” you said meekly. 

“Oh, thank god…” Bucky sighed to himself as he reached down to pick it up. “Are you hurt at all, did you fall?” He placed the bottle back on the ledge which made him reach across your naked body, on his way back his hand touched your shoulder then went to cup your cheek and move your head to look at him. 

“I’m all good, babe.” You smiled, an exhausting smile. 

“Alright, back-is-packed, finish up and I'll help you over to physio, alright?” Bucky closed the curtain to give privacy but waited for a verbal answer. 

“Perfect, thank you.” You grabbed the bottle again, your heart ached for him to be in the shower with you, it was something you did all the time before you were injured. 

“Don’t thank me, pretty lady.” Bucky reached for the door and opened it, before he could walk out, your voice quietly called his name, he could barely hear it over the water in the shower. “Yes?” he replied with the same softness. 

“Stay here with me, please.” the ‘please’ came after a beat, and extra plea. 

“Always,” Bucky sat on the toilet seat and gave the company you needed as you tried to stick your finger down your cast to itch that one spot on your leg. 

*****

Soon enough you were sat in the physio room, Bucky was off to the side with paper work in his lap and a binder in your backpack he packed for you. You liked the moral support when you were here because you never really had the best experience with doctors, Bucky would act like he wasn’t even there. That was a good thing, he did need to be the hovering boyfriend all the time because that can get tiring for both parties. He’d look up and listen to the doctor near the end, Bucky would write down the exercises and when to do them so he could gently remind you later. 

“Alright, you’re gonna get a new cast next week,” the doctor smiled at you, when you didn’t pick up on the excitement the doctor’s smile faded. “That means three quarters done!” Bucky had looked up and smiled, even clapped a couple times. 

“Then I have to learn how to walk again,” that was an exaggeration but it didn’t feel like one. 

The doctor gave a knowing look, “why do I feel like you’re already walking without the crutches?” You didn’t say anything because it was true. 

Your leg was examined and x-rayed, Bucky held onto your necklace as you went in. Your mind faded in and out as the doctor spewed ‘doctor stuff’ at you, you just didn’t have the care to listen; but Bucky did. He’s the type of guy to take notes and research later. 

Bucky would look over and see you looking at the floor, not even paying attention. He knew he couldn't get mad at you, you both dealt with injury very similarly. But something about seeing you shut down entirely made his heart ache, he wanted to reach out and lift the corners of your lips up into a smile because they seemed like they were being weighed down, he couldn’t remember the last time you smiled and real smile. He hadn’t been going on mission to keep you company, but now he knew his most important mission.

He walked you over to your therapy session that was still in the building, your Doc would come to the Avenger tower. He’d walk you right to the door of some random debrief room and kiss you goodbye. Bucky would hold your shoulders and gently rub your arms to hype you up before going in, he gave his little speech and said the same thing after. 

“You know I love you, and I know it’s hard.” he’d then kiss your cheeks and forehead. “I’ll be right here when you’re done, don’t even sweat it, pretty lady.” He then wouldn’t leave until the door closed and he heard muffled voices. 

The tower was right in the heart of the city, everything he needed was right there and a walking distance away. He slipped on a long sleeve and his gloves, he knew you took the backpack but you also had reusable bags, he took a few and headed out into the summer heat, it wasn’t humid today which was great but it wasn’t cold either. The tote bag was slung over his shoulder, all that was in it right now as a list. 

flowers 

chocolate

card

stuffed animal 

To call Bucky a romantic would seem weird to someone who only knew of him from the news or a museum, you knew him as a total hopeless romantic. Even in the 40’s, Bucky was the type of person to keep their walls up until he really got to know and trust you. It would normally be one little thing that would allow him to truly be himself around someone, he let his guard down that day you were walking to the restaurant he made a reservation at, Bucky placed himself so that arm or hand you’d hold would be his right but when you caught on you walk around him and looped both arms around his left, metal arm. After that, he was goner. 

He’d leave little sticky notes everywhere, a blue square paper in the coffee mug that read: ‘make sure you only drink one cup!’ or another on your shampoo bottle: ‘you look great naked ;)’. Bucky knew the little things mattered to you and vice versa, he knew that grand gestures didn’t mean anything without a little kiss that came before. 

The flower shop smelt great, Bucky didn’t know much about plants but he knew which ones you’d like. He was thinking of putting one on each bedside so whenever you’re lying in bed- which was a lot -you could look at some pretty flowers. They were a nice shade of purple and the stems were not too long, Bucky bought them and put them gently in his tote bag before heading over two stores to the grocery store you always shop at.

He was envyus of your clean eating, you’d eat what you want but you’d shop at fermer’s markets and organic stores. Bucky didn’t know it made a difference. He went to the frozen section and found chocolate covered strawberries. Bucky picked up a little pack of eight and headed to the front. There were also flowers there but they didn’t look nearly as nice. All he wanted was a very simple cute card with a blank inside, they were easy to find. It was cream coloured with a little sketch of a fuzzy, brown teddy bear holding a yellow balloon. All it said in dainty cursive at the top was: “look at you go!” Bucky knew this was perfect. Near the cards were little toys and stuffed animals. He found a bear that looked eerily similar to the one on the card but without the balloon. 

As he walked into the Avenger’s tower the bag was full and he had enough time to spare to set things up. Bucky headed to the rooms and made the bed, he changed the sheets as well because he knew you liked them when they were crisp. The teddy sat right in the middle with the card next to it. Bucky had written a little note that covered the entire right side of the card. He got a bowl from the kitchen and filled it with ice, he also found that white wine you liked and stuck it on there with the strawberries just to keep them cool but not melted. 

Bucky glanced at his watch and felt almost giddy as he realized it was time to head over to the conference room, he had to work on not giving it away when he’d first see you with his wide smile. The walk to the room was quick because of how fast Bucky was walking, he turned the corners sharp and almost jogged down the hall down the meeting rooms. He only stood there for about three seconds before the door slowly opened, Doc had opened the door and helped you out. Bucky’s smile turned into complete worry when you walked out holding a tissue to your nose, your eyes were red and puffy. Bucky also noticed that your fingernails were red and bleeding, that was one habit you were currently trying to break. 

“What’s going on?” Bucky asked in quiet disbelief, his eyebrows almost touching. 

Doc gave a curt nod, “we talked about a lot of things,” her answers were always so vague. 

You sniffled and waited for Doc to leave down the hall, Bucky was still looking at you. His hands held your shoulders and gently massaged the answer out of you. 

“It was a good cry, I needed that.” you sighed from exhaustion. 

A little piece of Bucky’s heart broke, if you needed to have a good cry then you could have told him, he would’ve listened. Bucky started to go back and see where it went wrong, if he was too overbearing and if this whole afternoon he had planned was created at a very wrong time. He wanted to ask what he did wrong but what came out was different. “Well that’s good to hear, I know Doc is good at that- helping you out.” His words were true but something about the delivery made it seem uneasy. 

“I just-” you looked to the ceiling and hoped to find the words you needed written there. “I like flushing it all out to her because I won’t see her for a week and I don’t need to keep up with what I’m feeling. I always cry to you but Doc is just really good at explaining how I feel, you’re there to validate it and make me feel soothed.” You held his left hand as you both walked down the hallway. “I feel lighter, like, I feel better.”

“That’s always good, sweetheart,” Bucky made sure you were putting weight on him because you didn’t bring your crutches but you really should have. “I have a little treat for you,” He turned to face you when you both stood at his door, Bucky kept his hand on the door handle. “I know it’s been a rough few weeks but I hope you know I love you all the same, and all I see is my strong, beautiful girlfriend.” Bucky saw your confused face, as he opened the door to reveal a dim lit room with flowers, wine and a teddy your eye welled up with tears again. 

You gasped and put your hands on your chest, “for me?” your voice shook as you walked in, you peered into the ice bucket to see your favourite wine and some food as well as a card beside the ice bucket, under the teddy. Tears flowed down your face as the feeling of being overwhelmed washed over you, you could barely string a sentence together. A hand waved the gifts all away, “too much,” was all you could muster. 

“No, baby,” Bucky smiled, he walked over and pulled you into a hug. “Nothing will ever be too much for you.”

He let you cry in his chest for a very long time, you both ended up sitting on the edge of the bed as he stroked all the way up your back. His hand would bunch up your hair as he went up to your neck. His lips were right at your ear, all he whispered were sweet nothings and a calming ‘shh’ once and a while. When you had a little composure Bucky reached for the card, as you read it your lips trembled even more. A hand stayed glued to your heart as your body warmed at loving words, you could barely read it with blurry vision from the tears but it still seemed crystal clear. Your finger traced over the signature: ‘love you to the moon and back, Bucky’. And you crumbled again, your forehead hit his chest as you cried away all the pent up emotion you thought you flushed out at your therapy session. 

With all the crying you were so tired, Bucky had thrown on a movie you two could watch while enjoying your strawberries and wine. You only had two and half a cup before you were snoring on Bucky’s shoulder, he tried to nudge you a couple times but nothing worked at all. He watched the movie on his own and saved the last two strawberries for you in the morning. You didn’t even wake up at him getting up and leaving the room. When he came back he got you out of your day clothes and into something comfy. 

*****

You woke up to the sun hitting your back, when your eyes opened they focused on the flowers and a smile graced your face. It was the first time in a long time since you smiled with your eyes, a little giggle even slipped out. 

At that sound Bucky walked out of the bathroom, “well there she is,” he smiled wide. 

“What does that mean?” you wiped the drool from the side of your mouth, “I had a nap, a really good one, too.” You seemed to be bragging. 

“A nap? Baby, it’s eight.” Bucky raised his eyebrows. 

“Ya, I fell asleep at about five so I had a three hour nap, no biggie.” You rolled on your back and stretched out, your gaze moved back to Bucky when you heard a giggle, “what?” you laughed back. 

“Eight in the morning, the next day. Your three hour nap was actually a well deserved fifteen hour hibernation.” Bucky joined you on the bed. 

“That’s why I feel so good,” you sighed, you looked over to Bucky and swatted his chest at his little smirk. “Don’t think like that.” 

“I bet I can make you feel just as good-”

You cut him off with a kiss.