#bitch I'm DISABLED
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We had a religious fanatic of a chem teacher who made us read prayers and I STILL hated PE more
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#fuck the woman who taught us she can rot for all i care#she used to get on my ass for not 'making effort'#bitch I'm DISABLED#i am literally NOT ALLOWED TO DO STUFF YOU ASK OF ME#luckily after i transferred my new PE teacher was the sweetest and literally gave out good grades for being average#like of course to have an A you had to be near perfect but for a B you had to just pass the baseline for 'being able to do the exercise'#eg for basketball we had 5 tries to score a goal and for an A you had to score 4/5 but for a B you had to just score#put a ball in that basket at least once and youre good#i still didnt like PE but at least i didnt hate it with passion like before
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You don't get to misgender people yes even if you think they're cringe (get over it), yes even if you don't understand it (get Over It), yes even if you think they're a terrible person (irrelevent), yes even if they have done objectively horrible harmful things (still irrelevent,) and yes, even if you think they "can't really know for sure" because of their disability (that's fucking ableist, shut your goddamn mouth.)
#youtube tried to push me ANOTHER fucking chr/is-chan video and I'm seeing red#i could literally talk for hours about the decades- plural- DECADES-long ABUSE campaign but its not really my fucking business.#i WILL bitch about the notion that disabled people somehow don't know themselves well enough to be trans. go to fucking hell#ableism mention
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it's a big fatigue day and I am once again praying the atrophy has not spread to a new limb but hmmmmmmmmmm it's the fifth day in a row that my leg has been incredibly weak and keeps giving out so. hm. maybe I should see my neuro again sooner rather than later jhfjfjhf
#crippleposting#physically disabled#medical misadventures of bougie b. bitch#PLEASE DON'T BE ALS PLEASE DON'T BE ALS PLEASE DON'T BE -#I mean I don't think it is at this point. it's progressing but not THAT fast#but they're pretty certain it's 'something neuromuscular'#and as I have. um. upper motor neuron AND lower moton neuron signs.... HAHAHA THIS IS FINE#I mean there are other things on the differential and because I have several pre-existing conditions that can ALSO have neuro effects#though they shouldn't cause THIS#I'm hoping it's a weird mix of multiple conditions???#but yeah#the fun of being a 'complex' medical case
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in lieu of having posted any writing/headcanons/asks in the past few days because i have been *so* busy and unable to do anything fandom-related which is terrible and evil, i have a poll out of morbid curiosity and self-indulgence. i've been meaning to ramble here about how i feel about DC's lack fo Deaf representation and which Batfam members i would personally make Deaf, but i am mildly curious about the larger opinion and now i will subject you all to the question, i would love to hear thoughts/opinions/headcanons on any specific choices. (would love d/Deaf/HoH opinions esp but i'm mostly expecting this to reach the hearing crowd, so opinions from hearing ppl are ones i'm very curious about. if you've never given it thought before you are going to now or else /lh)
#necrotic nuisance#<- new tag for nonserious shit like this#batfamily#batclan#deafculture#i think not including bruce in this poll bc i ran out of options is *so* fucking funny so i'm keeping it#bc realistically i could bump off more tertiary characters like harper or jpv to include him#but i won't.#hearing people are seriously invited to reblog and share opinions or headcanons i'm so genuine#just like. behave about it.#i have personal headcanons but i will save sharing them until the poll is finished#as not to skew results#i also have a hunch on who will lead. based on popular headcanons i see#but i will also not share that as to not skew it#i'm using the Deaf identity as an umbrella term that can include Hard of Hearing as well btw#so if your headcanon is more HoH leaning it is counted#i do believe this is something most fans haven't rlly thought about#but i *really* want to write fics with Deaf rep and i have been waffling on who to make Deaf#so. this poll is also a field test of who you would like to see me (a Deaf bitch) write as Deaf.#and i totally pinky promise not to project super duper hard on them. (i'm so lying)#i will get back to writing and the ask games i promse!#tomorrow i have the day off after 4 bc someone else is watching the baby so ic can just chill#also *please please* if you have disabled headcanons for any batfam (or DC in general) character#send them to me. i want to see them. i would love to talk about them with you.#as an anon ask as a message as a reblog idc#gimme.#this isn't my usual content but shhh lemme be self indulgent.#both bc i'm curious and bc i wanna write Deaf shit so. we take a break from my usual nonsense for this.#i'll post writing tomorrow to make up for it#also i have to remind myself this is my blog i can do what i want with and not just be a content machine. yk
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#working in a library is all cool and aesthetic and my dream job but fr the people are horrible#both libraries I have worked at had the worst team ever#everyone is hating and bitching#i left my old work because I cried like every second day and now at my new work one of my colleagues has a problem with me#I have an autoimmune disease and I'm staying more at home because of that than any other colleague#but like I'm disableded and they knew it when I started there#and now she is going crazy and all#and I worte a very passive aggressive text in the group chat about my disability and how people who read at work instead of working should#probably shut their mouth#now I'm shaking and feel sick because it was not I nice text I send and I'm scared of the follow up but i was so angry and can't any more#bullshit of her#like wth#sorry needed to vent#vent post#to delete
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the amount of praise veilguard gets for accessibility is actually going to drive me up a wall
#like? arguably? aside from a couple features that are NOT unique to datv - it's significantly worse than previous instalments#bitch i'm physically disabled if i wanna play a game using a controller i have to choose between doing dishes & having fun that night#and the UI is so ridiculously overcrowded#why the fuck did CIPT give it a diamond award#like i get that what's accessible for one person can be inaccessible for another#so when you have all these mechanics that might be helpful for some people but you don't get them the option to toggle them off#you end up with new problems for other people!!#maybe i'm just pissed that they nuked the tactical pause bc that's what made DA accessible for me in the first place#veilguard critical#bioware critical#hell brain hours
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Respectfully I think it's really weird to suggest to somebody that they should go on disability just because they may talk about being disabled, especially in passing, and especially to someone whose disability you do not know the full context/extent of. There is a LOT OF WORK that goes into researching, applying, and being approved for disability, and not everyone has the time and/or energy to do that, and also, some disabled people simply do not want to be on disability for whatever reason and it's none of your business why.
#THIS IS NOT INSPIRED BY ANYTHING ONLINE. IM BITCHING ABOUT MY RECENT EXPERIENCES IRL 💀#that white queer's face when I told him I don't want to fucking go on disability for very personal reasons unrelated to any politics: 😨#disability#young disabled#chronic pain#actually disabled#physical disability#FIVE whole people have suggested I go on disability now over the past few years. NO!!!!!!!#first of all I'm already on financial aid! It's really weird to assume disability is the only financial aid a disabled poor person can get!#leave me alone man
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HGK live action is producing a lot of interesting ppl who somehow watch a show about how isolating having a disability can be because of able-bodied people's lack of empathy or willingness to reach out and connect with disabled people on their level and how that can hurt, and then turn around and call one of the disabled characters a raging irredeemable bitch because she's standoffish towards their able-bodied precious cinnamon roll and insults him (notice how she never says anything other characters haven't already said to him) not considering why she might act or feel that way.
#bl fans being misogynistic? I'm shocked! /s#'how dare this female character have one [1] flaw'#clearly no growth is needed on Taichi's part! it's not a character flaw to not be able to acknowledge your feelings of jealous and instead#frame your desires in terms of a disabled person 'needing' or 'not needing' you. cause that's not infantilizing at all! even if you don't#mean anything by it and are working through emotions yourself#and this is not me 'hating' on Taichi (hey I'm not the one calling anyone 'a bitch' here) I love Taichi he's the main character lol#but somehow everyone wants to ignore his faults and paint Maya as a villain because she's 'getting in the way' of their precious yaoi#just me#hidamari ga kikoeru#i hear the sunspot#hgk#there were ppl like this when the manga chapters were coming out too it's just there's more of them now
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oughhh. crying + shaking + throwing up (had to apply for housing)
#.txt#vent#i'm soooooooooo scared chat#the social housing in my city is. Dire (10 year waiting list lmao) but bc we're ✨ disabled ✨ we might get seen faster#but like. you can't apply as a disabled person without a OT letter but you can't get an OT letter without a housing application number#do you see. do you see my problem#so i've had to apply with these issues without evidence? and i'm sOOO scared they're g onna be like ''bitch? die''#(there was no where to Submit evidence) (i think this is just me being autistic about forms again)#but i'm SO SCARED#and i maybe might have mentioned the whole . nearly kicking me out for top surgery thing from a couple years ago#and i don't know if i should have ?#i mean like. objectively yes. everyone i spoke to at the time said Yeah. Buddy.#but i don't KNOWWWWWW it's been like 2 years since that happened#and even though it Haunts me (:D) i feel bad bringing it up NOW#i am not crying or throwing up but i am genuinely shaking and it is a bad time.#ANYWAY#i did it. it is done. i'm sure it'll all work out in the end.#and maybe in 5-7 business years i might possibly get to move out of my fucking parents house.#a manthing can dream.
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me: *tells audiologist abt how sensitive my hearing is and how how i can hear electricity and things*
audiologist in notes: *patient reports auditory hallucinations*
#this was years ago#but i'm still salty#like bitch no patient did not#doctors stop assuming shit challenge#also doctors not *saying* anything abt assumptions/diagnoses is shitty#fuck those guys#disability#chronic pain#disabled#chronic illness#chronically ill#physically disabled#mentally disabled
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you know, watching smosh play beopardy feels a little cruel sometimes.
#I'm watching these theatre kids struggle with basic questions while eating some curry and... I kind of feel like a bully...#I did know all the stuff you should know#because you really should know most of it lmao#the only one that would've fucked me was final beopardy#not because I don't know how to do it but because I'm physically disabled and I can't grip things well anymore lmao#as a former floridian there's another answer to the alligator/crocodile question btw#which is that crocodiles are giant bitches and alligators are actually pretty chill#it's good to be able to differentiate them visually so you know how fucked you are#also affect can be both a verb and a noun and so can effect but that's just the copy editor in me lmao#they just teach you that rule in elementary school because those are the primary uses of those words#but both affect and effect have other definitions too so it's not really a perfect rule to remember#smosh
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Ignore all logistical considerations of "would they ever meet each other under these circumstances". If you don't think Jules Bashir would have chosen to join Starfleet, imagine he is on the station for some other reason, or they meet in some other location.
I wanted to make this poll because I've seen various fics where Garak reassures Julian that far from being upset over him being augmented, Garak is grateful for it, either explicitly because (he thinks) they wouldn't be able to have their usual conversations if it weren't for the augmentations, or simply because he likes Julian "just the way he is" and wouldn't want him to be "different". I disagree that Garak would think like this (or at the very least, I think Julian would react negatively if he did, rather than be reassured), so I wanted to hear everyone else's thoughts.
#garashir#Star Trek: Deep Space 9#this is not just a shipping question btw so please answer whether you view them platonically/romantically/whatever!#Julian Bashir#polls#Starky's original posts#I'll admit. to me there is a very clear right and wrong answer here.#again not in terms of Garak's characterization so much as in terms of JULIAN'S.#I would be fine if Garak said this and Julian felt at least somewhat conflicted about it but I've never seen even that........#I've wanted to make this post for SO LONG but it's a very common thing in a lot of fics that I otherwise REALLY LIKE#from authors that I REALLY LOVE AND ADMIRE#and I have no idea if I'm just being completely insane and oversensitive OTL#but I just read yet another fic where Garak was like ''I have no choice but to be grateful you were genetically enhanced#because Jules would never have joined Starfleet so we never would have met.''#and I just want to yell WHY DO YOU ALL ASSUME THAT#like not even getting into assuming that Jules would be permanently significantly intellectually disabled#based on limited information about his early childhood developmental delays#but more importantly assuming he wouldn't (read: couldn't. because I KNOW that's what you mean.) end up on the station#You! Star Trek fan! Do you think people with intellectual or learning disabilities are allowed in Starfleet? Answer quickly! :)#sorry I told you I've held onto this for too long. and now I'm a deranged bitch about it :|
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Also making a separate appreciation post for Moe GRISPING HIM. READY TO ATTACK. LUNGE and KILL‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

And Alfonse doesn't even flinch, he just goes

And braces for impact.
Also also ADDITIONAL APPRECIATION. FOR

Woulgh.
Was just gonna tag ramble BUT. NO. MAIN POST. I'm SUCH A FAN of the faces here. Moe's delayed reaction time, or just. Having really neutral reactions to getting scuffed up or the like. Autism creature. COMBINED with Alfonse's overt panic and instant like REFLEXIVE instinct to catch Moe. LIKE REALLY REALLY FUN pose in general!!!!! But ALSO. THEY'RE SO. EXPLODES 💥💥💥💥💥
#fire emblem#feh#WAS REALLY STRUGGLING. TO FIND WORDS. FIGHTING FOR MY LIFE. USED UP MY MANA SLOTS#but. i got it. i made it.#def tireds though. gonna call it soon#i will say the delayed reaction time IS ABSOLUTELY A BITCH. on the battlefield.#moe was the type of kid who'd get a dodgeball hit square in the face and just. see it coming. watch it coming. and just stand there.#unresponsively.#that thang was NOT BUILT TO LAST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! not like this anyway!!!!!!!!!#TO THE BACK LINES WITH YOU. OR SO HELP ME.#LIKE. i do wonder/think about if it's something it can improve upon. like ddr. you just need to Get Good#but even then like. irl example i play basic difficulty in ddr. if i'm. ambitious. sometimes i'm in the zone for sure#but even then i kinda level out there LMFAOOOO#like yeah do whatever you want forever but also. i like portraying a level of disability in moe.#which is PRECISELY WHY. huge part of why anyway. seperate from psychological reasons#why it took to healing to be 'helpful'. it can be helpful. in a way that doesn't require it to almost absolutely get killed very quickly.#anyways just. WOE endless moe thoughts upon ye!!!!! and. alfonse :)#fe alfonse#moe tag#summoner oc#my art
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received 2 huge needles in my ankle and almost passed out today, so that was fun
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my elderly neighbor acting annoyed in jest vs me being unable to tell if she's fully joking or not... i knocked on her door bc she offered to help me with something (taking bags downstairs) and asked her when she'd be free, she said "do you want me to help you right now?" sounding frustrated so i was like "no no, we can do another day" and she asked if i was free tmrw and i said no, so then she threw her hands in the air and said "for fuck's sake!" and at the time i laughed it off but part of me is like WAAHHHHH did i misread her initial tone?? she sounded like she was disgruntled, i heard her watching tv. i'm used to scheduling things with people in advance but i'm now realizing that she's retired so she probably doesn't have as much going on gkjdsgkj it's prob why she said "knock anytime"
#lay text#maybe i did misread her tone :/#oh well#i also mentioned me getting high w my neighbor lol#and her eyes were like O_O#poor lady#jk... she once called a disabled woman a whiny bitch#after she faked being nice to her in the elevator#and i was like ?????????#so i do noooot trust her#but hey i'm in a wheelchair and can only carry one big bag at a time so hell yeah i'll take the help when i really need it#unless my gf or a friend help me first >w<
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i was looking back through recent characters i've made/updated and damn. i cannot make a cis abled character to save my life!
#this bitches gay! good for them!#these bitches disabled! not so good for them!#call me obi-wan the way i'm chopping limbs off#sorry to all the blorbos who have anxiety
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