#blahaj party

[the-turkoshaj]

The Birthday Party

*Turkoshaj opens her doors to whoever will come. Her living room is brighly decorated with various party decorations*

[aqueousablution]

Yeah, my party is BYOB

Bring Your Own BLÅHAJ (It's a sleepover 👉👈)

[introjis]

u wanted nest emojis i saw? i love nesting :D maybe one w a creeper, a big hello kitty (important cuz shes my comfort plush <3), a shark, a big bear, a sheep, a chibi superman, a tbh creature plush and a ipad w youtube playing? all wrapped up in a nice green blanket :3 sorry if thats a lot, u can skip some of the things i requested idm ^^

sorry I couldn't fit everything as well as I could before but hey! now you have versions of your stuffies all cuddled up to watch a chibi superman movie on youtube!

[the-turkossmahaj]

The pain in my throat has stopped plaguing me, but I’m now facing the problem of not being able to stop coughing

[comrade-redacted]

Femboy tea party (he finished his cup first what the hell)

[bubblerise]

LOOK AT MY BLAHAJ I NAMED THEM FUUKA

HAPPY FUUKA FRIDAY

Lemons

the enemy returned to normal to normal

only one enemy left left

[eleanor-second-floret]

Um, hello, sorry for the message. I am getting domesticated next Tuesday of my own volition. Is there anything I need to know? It wasn't well explained to me, and I'm a little curious. I'm embarrassed to ask the affini who explained it all to me, I feel like that moment has passed.

-curious

Okay so a few tips

- get used to being cute like ALL THE TIME

- you’ll need more than one favorite food bc the Affini will try to give you your favorite foods all the time

- no more schedules. You’ll have a routine but your Affini will manage it for you

- xenodrugs are fun, do more xenodrugs

- your Affini will find it adorable when you walk into their room to sleep with them because “you had a bad dream” and it’s an easy hack for more snuggles

- other florets are so much fun and you should ask their Affini about them bc they like to tell secrets and it’s cute when florets get all blushy

- the compiler in your hab can make anything you want I have 50 Blahaj each of different sizes and every one of them named after Affini I met. We have tea parties.

- the shampoo has class A’s in it, which makes bath time so much better

- always have an affinity for go with you to the J cafes, so you can get some class L’s and they can take you home

- if your Affini seems to be stingy with the xenodrugs just talk about your special interest for 2 hours without taking a breath and you’ll get the super secret extra fun xenodrugs PLUS it’s nice when your Affini says “That’s nice, petal” and pats your head.

- collar accessorizing is a must

- no matter how much u want to do not monch the Affini’s leaves.

- do. NOT. the. vine.

[otvian]

NA vs art party asuras

I was as Scientist Euma, here is Oceanologist Fizzix (and blahaj) and Spiritchanneler Tix (damn what a long name) ENJOY

[velvetvexations]

so.... a disproportionate proportion of TRFs are tankies, from what you've said

and now there are TRFs arguing that blahaj is transfem culture and other people engaging with the meme and the plush are "stealing" it from trans women

......does this mean that there are tankies arguing that "purchasing a mass-produced product from a massive international company is virtuous culture and how dare you steal that from us"?

yes

I saw one who goes really hard on the tankie stuff be like "let the blood on the sidewalk speak!" as a call for transfems to talk about having Transfem Culture ripped away from them and it was immediately followed by a self-reblog like "is this how I find out the TMEs stole [a mass-produced product from a massive international corporation] from us" and I mean fucking lmfao right she's gonna have to burn that Communist Party of America card

[petty-noire]

closest thing to KT holding a Blahaj Iv'e seen

делоем сушевые

[the-odethaj]

A comprehensive list of everything brought to @the-purpurhaj's Easter meal (so far):

Five bottles of Blahaj Blast and a Pizza, courtesy of @the-turkoshaj

Undisclosed Meat Ravioli from @the-haj

A whole-ass horse from @den-av-alla-hajen

Several massive cakes of varying flavors brought by @the-smahaj somehow

Color-changing seaweed of unknown origins acquired by @the-attaarmadhaj

Various saps and a jug of blood from @blodhaj

"Eggs from a creature" - @the-frankenhaj

A big mysterious pot (unknown what food it contains) from @the-demonhaj

Huge tubs of ice cream and sprinkles brought by @the-djavulsksilverhaj

"Salty popcorn" from @the-gulhaj (I'm sorry gul but it looks like you put popcorn on top of salad and I think i see corn in there?? 😭)

Transphobe Soup from Fate and kielbasa and pierogis from me, @the-odethaj

Lamb from @the-arohaj

Absolutely incredible looking shepherd's pie from @the-tech-priesthaj

Cannolis from @the-magentahaj

Deviled eggs + shrimp (oooh fancy and DELICIOUS) from @the-gimmick-hospital

"Party mix" from rodbrun and a keg full of Gunpowder, blood, and wine from Salt @the-rodbrunhaj

FOOD

^from @the-blalilahaj

Several metric tons of krill from @the-blavingad (thank you whale parent. I have decided you are all of the blahajverse's parent now because this is parent behavior /lh /hj)

Bagels brought by @demonhaj

Meringues from @regnbagshaj!!

An attempted cake from @thedivineguldhaj (Don't worry! I'll eat some!)

Ham from @the-grahaj

[thisdastampdoesnotexist]

blahaj shark wearing a nirvana hoodie with fire text "SHARKS EATING YOUR GENDER PARTY" oh and also the trans flag 👍

[dm-haj]

HELLO EVERYONE/EVERYHAJ!!!

I’m looking to start a blahaj based dungeons and dragons and campaign, please dm me if you’d like to join( or we could play post by post with no set party)

Thank you for your time!

[wellcome-to-chaos]

*zey attempt to move the blahaj out of the way, some end up on the floor, one ends up by @thebookofanon *

*"nuuuu the shorks on the floor"* :(

... hey, uh, partygoers? ... i'm... getting tired. uh... i might... have to step out of the competition... not like i stood a chance at being the "prettiest bill" anyways...

. . .

... i'm going to put on my pajamas and put on a movie for everyone.

... see you all soon!

[axl-gets-creative]

lil scenario i cooked up from my mcr crossover au while writing diabolical shi :)

just lil silly thingz from my crossover au <3 ive been working on this au for like- a week so im glad i can start to make content abt it!

characters: Gerard Way, Daisy (OC), Frank Iero, Ray Toro, killjoys, mikey way, bli hoes

THIS IS NOT RPF, ALL CHARACTERS INVOLVED ARE WRITTEN ABOUT IN A FICTIONAL SENSE

so basically i took my mcr au and crossed it w/ the killjoys au which i also weaved in sum of my own headcannons so yeah. also i'd make this into a fic but i think its too silly to write professionally so yah-

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Context: the bitches be taking a trip thru california to visit mikey who was also taking a trip in california and they stay at a crusty ass motel six in the middle of zone 3 and run into the killjoys

Ray: Hi can we book a-

*CRASHHHHHHH*

bli faggot #1: HANDS UP THIS IS AN INVASIO-

*ANOTHER CRASHHHHH*

*KILLJOYS MAKE THEIR CUNTY ENTRANCE*

Fun ghoul: FUCK YOU BASTARD *kills w/ ray gun*

the bitches: wtf-

bli faggot #2: *appears* HEY THAT IS VIOLENCE AGAINST A GOVERNMENT EMPLO-

Jet star: RAAAAAAHHH🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅*rips out faggot #2s internal organs

blie faggot #3: OH HELL NAH I AM SKIDADDLIN MAN I AINT GETTING DUSTED BY A BUNCH OF HOMOSAPIENS🙏🙏🙏(he means homosexuals)

Party poison: GO THEN BITCH WDGAF

bli faggot #4: CAN YALL FUCKERS JUST CUT IT OUT SO WE CAN KILL U

kobra kid: WOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW SO UR GONNA KILL A GROUP OF QUEER KIDS??? WOWWWWWW HOW HOMOPHOBIC MAN I THOUGHT U WAS BETTER THAN THIS😔😔😔😔😔😔

bli faggot #4: H-HEY!!! WE'RE NOT HOMOPHOBIC!!!😖😖

Daisy: ok, WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE???????

fun ghoul: bli faggots tryna invade the zones again and kill innocent ppl

bli faggot #4 & 5: *points guns at bitches*

bitches and killjoys: *collectively* HEY HEY WOAH WOAH WOAH WO-

Party poison *shoots them both cutely* 🥰🥰🥰🎀🎀🎀🎀

Party poison: ok i think we've killed all of them can we go to ikea now i wanna get a new blahaj 😋😋

Jet star: BITCH U ALREADY HAVE FOUR OF THEM TRANS ASS!

Ray: Ok, can someone PLEASE explain wtf we just witnessed instead of fighting over ikea shark plushies??

Kobra kid: uh so basically theres like this corp called better living industries aka bli and they tryna wipe out all things that rn't bland and emotionless but me and these other fag- i mean dudes are this team of rebels, we're called the fabulous killjoys u can go follow us on insta <3 and uh we basically fight them and shi to protect the zones 👍

*crickets*

Frank: oooookayyyyyy..... so r we.. safe now..???

Fun ghoul: yah

bli faggot #6: *busts😩thru window*

everyone: OH FUCK NA-

Party poison: dw hgs i got this o-

bli faggot #6: *explodes the whole function*

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context: part two of the last one 😭 so like everything explodes and they all somehow survive but since the motel went brrr the killjoys offered the bitches to stay w/ them (lowkey might make this into a fic chat..)

*the bitches squeezed into the back of the transgen- i mean trans am silently as the killjoys sang aeysha erotica aggressively*

Frank: so uh- *ehem* thx uh for the ride and everything but uuuhh were r we going?

Jet star: our hideout

Daisy: wait- what? i thought u were gonna take us to another hotel or smth??

Jet star: oh no, no no no, *eheh* that WAS the only hotel so uhhh yeah its our place or a draculoid mask <3

Ray: wtf is a draculoid mask??

Kobra kid: *turns down radio ever so slightly* looks like i have to be the paragraph guy ?? okayyy uh so its these vampire gorilla mask thingys that when u put it on, u loose all sense of self and reality and u see killjoys or rlly anyone that ISNT brainwashed by bli as like these spider thingys and they have to be "squashed" so its like their way of making killing machines for us

Ray; ........ so im guessing these ppl rlly dont like u guys

Killjoys: yup

Ray: okAy...

Frank: wait so uhh we're going west right? bc we're traveling to a friend in that direction.

Kobra kid: oh uuh- ye- *ugh* wait on sec- *yelling* FOR FUCKS SAKE TURN THE FUCKING MUSIC DOWN POISON!!!!!!!

Fun ghoul: OH FUCK U MAN * radio back up*

fun, star, and poison: GOTTA PINK PURSE WITHA RINESTONE BUCKLE KEEP A PINK STUN GUN JST IN CASE IM IN TROUBLE-

Kobra kid: im going to murder u ppl

Party poison: that violence against a transgender individual so that classifys as a hate crime <333

Fun ghoul: DAMN RIGHT MF

the bitches (exept gerard bc he went sleepy): oh my lord...

*FAST FORWARDNMSKUDCNHL*

Daisy: hey gee cmon get up we're here

Gerard: huh- where?

Frank: the killjoys crib hoe now get ur wakey wakey eggs and bakey ass up

Gerard: im sorry did u just say wakey wakey eggs and fucking bakey????

Frank: its called sarcasm dipshit

Gerard: did u just call me a dipshit??????????????????????????

Frank: r u fucking high-

Ray: *already out of the car* GUYS CMON DO U WANNA SIT AND FIGHT IN A CRUSTY ASS CAR ALL EVENING???

Party poison: HEY OUR CAR IS NOT CRUSTY 😤😤😤😤

Jet star: no no it- it is. it is poison.

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context: part 3 everyones in da crib 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥(this was originally all one part but it was too long so i split it💀)

Gerard: so uhh what now? how r we gonna get to mikey?

Daisy: OH SHIT I FORGOT ABT HIM-

Frank: how tf do u forget abt ur brother-in-law?

Daisy: OK WELL- for the record, no offence Gerard-, hes not my legal in law so im allowed to have short term memory loss ok, midget?

Ray Frank and Gee: *side eyeing eachother*

Daisy: what????

Ray: Daisy imma hold ur hand when i say thi-

Gerard: NOPENOPENOPE UR NOT SAYING SHI-

"poison busts😩into the room in a skirt so mini its exiting the stratosphere*

Party poison: I GOT PIZZA MFS🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

Fun ghoul: IS THAT FUCKING PINEAPPLE

Party poison: uuhh yeah? whats wrong w/ pineapple??? 😭

Fun ghoul: BRO... ITS FRUIT. ON FUCKING PIZZA

Party poison: SO???? TOMATO IS A FRUIT AND ITS ON PIZZA AND NO ONE SAYS SHIT!!!!

Fun ghoul: THATS BC IT DOESNT TASTE LIKE A FRUIT AND MOST PPL R TOO FUCKING STUPID TO EVEN KNOW THAT TOMATO IS A FRUIT!

Jet star: OMG STFU U FAGGOTS ITS JUST PIZZA

Fun ghoul: HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL U PPL TO SHUT THE FUCK UP IN ONE DAY?????????????

Kobra kid: WAIT I HAVE A SOLUTION, poison just put fun ghoul on the pizza hes fruity enough and if it doesnt taste good than we know fruit isnt good on pizza🥰🥰🥰🥰

everyone: .....

Gerard: i dont mean to chime in, but WTF kind of mentality is that??💀

Jet star: autism

Fun ghoul: kobra did u just imply that im a homosexual.

Kobra kid: wait ur not?

Party poison: *cunty gasp* FUN GHOUL HOW DARE U LIE SO HARD😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢

Frank: yeah imma go get sum fresh air yall brb..

Ray: ugh take me w/ u 😭🙏

Jet star: ok everyone CALM TF DOWN ok😔😔😔 we have guests!!

Fun ghoul: idgaf let them burn <3

Kobra kid: FUN GHOUL!!!!!!😡😡😡

Daisy: type shi

Gerard: ok sooo uuuhhhhh seriously how r we gonna get to my brother??

Party poison: depends, where in cali is he?

Gerard: uhhh palmmm desert i think?

Party poison: DAYUM that is FARRRRR *bites hair in cunt*

Kobra kid: dont yall have a car or smth hoes???

Daisy: it exploded along w/ everything within a 20 feet radius of the motel 💀

Kobra kid: ohhh ritghhgttt shorry😋😋😋😋😋

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ok i have zero ideas on how to continue this so imma repost to my main blog and hopefully yall could gimme sum feedback or ideas 🙏🙏🙏

[thegenderienvy]

Hello! I’m a 24 year old trans man living in central florida. I’m currently rushing to get my hysterectomy completed before the republican party can limit gender affirming care even more than they have already. If you can, please consider donating to help me cover my insurance copays and afford the time off work I need to heal.

As a plus I will be making mini crochet blahaj toys for everyone who donates $30 or more.

https://gofund.me/b6405dd3