#but also angel. is one rotating in my brain. FOR VARIOUS REASONS

[birdricks]

normally i dont ever think abt nicknames or like “pet names” ig when it comes to pairings i like but i do truly in my heart believe rick is the type of person to end up calling bp by like 100 different cutesy names without even realising. like he’ll say smth as a joke once but like also serious. and bp always takes it in such a way that rick just keeps using it bc he feels like he can get away with it without being cringe or whatever

[bitedownme]

Good morning. Various scenarios I’ve been rotating in my head.

---

“Have you ever thought about finding a way out of this place?” 

“You mean, like, escaping?”

“Yeah.”

There was just a kindling of something in the bottom of her throat. Not the typical anger Ire was used to. It was more… fidgety instead of overflowing. Still, she watched and waited as they seemed to think over the question. 

She could think of dozens of reasons why someone might be hesitant to try to escape. Fear being the biggest. Of what would be done to you if caught in the act, or later down the line.

Not knowing how to get home. If there was even anything left of home to get back to, or if it’d all been burned to the ground. 

… she needed to find a more permanent way to make her brain shut up. 

“I can’t say I’ve ever really thought of it,” the human answered quietly, honestly. “It’s not-- I mean I wouldn’t really know where to begin.”

A quiet pang of sympathy rang in Ire’s chest. Grateful for the honest, but also loathing that this was likely to be a trend. That she couldn’t poke and prod for information out of here because no one could mount the fear-

“I don’t want to leave anyways, so-”

“What?” the dragon interrupted

“Huh?” the human responded, in equal tone, before very quickly changing the subject into, “You know, outside of these halls, there’s this god that can distort your flesh-”

---

The shapechanger spoke like he was planning to eat everyone he spoke to one day; the mockery of an angel spoke like he knew the day. If one could ignore that fact, it was, er, interesting to see them interact. 

That was to say they went back and forth like they’ve been bitterly divorced since the dawn of time. 

“The entire reason you were handed command of the leviathans was for the march,” Moloch pressed.

Again? Their tones felt like this was a conversation that had happened many, many times before, and would happen many, many times again. “Not using them, or keeping them on the sides is a total waste of their potential and a double waste of the resources spent to get them there.”

“You have the right to be incorrect,” Jeser answered, perhaps too chipper for what was coming out of his teeth, “Yet as sorry as I am that you feel your lack of perspective is somehow greater than my lived experience, I cannot find the capacity to care for your idiocy today.”

She had a sneaking suspicion that the only reason Moloch didn’t tear out Jeser’s throat then and there was because of the behemoth of smoke and ash lingering in the doorway.

Yet with how the false angel twitched and puffed up, she doubted Goran would be able (or willing) to stop him if he decided to, say, casually attempt to drown his prince. 

There was tapping on the back of her hand. Her eyes met the gaze of the human, who was biting their lip to keep their mouth shut. But just from the mad glint in those eyes alone, there was a story that they were eager to share. 

Once the lovers were done getting divorced. Again. 

---

“That is a large predatory fish.”

“It’s Bob!”

Ire stared down at the red-eyed… thing in the pond. It stared back. Definitely a good chunk bigger than the normal predatory fish she had to worry about back home.

Maybe a little more than half a meter longer than the common, skittish piranhas that liked to follow her whenever she went to the mangroves. 

Closer in weight to a common shark, though. 

The half-dragon watched, confused and deeply amused, as the human flipped their legs into the pond, and the strange fish rolled off its side to go brush up against them. 

“Why?” she asked at length. 

“Why not?” was the immediate answer. 

A fair counter. She couldn’t conceive a way to keep something like a cat or a songbird within these halls without risking it being eaten. At least the fish had enough teeth and could move fast enough to not be worth the effort. 

“What does it eat?”

“Oh, anything that doesn’t take a chunk out of him first, really.”

Apparently that was literal. 

In the wild, Bob’s cousins preferred shellfish and other, smaller, sweeter fish. Bob however, ate anything and everything: small mammals, small to medium amphibians and reptiles, the occasional bird. Most of it was straps from the kitchen, or from the parts of a hunt that weren’t ideal: bones, pieces of cartilage, tendons, skin. The occasional organ and the like.

“Okay, no, wait. He went out, caught a fish, you asked if you could keep it, and he relented? Do I have that right?”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure the only reason I was allowed to keep him was because I insulted Jeser.”

“That- is that seriously all it’d take?”

---

It was loud. 

Monsoon season meant bursts of on and off raining ending in glorious blooms where Ire was from. In this new place, monsoon season apparently meant massive localized flooding and winds strong enough to put hurricanes back home to shame. 

Even in the depths of the palace, those winds managed to find every crack and gap in the stone walls and sent whistling channels throughout every hall. Thunder seemed to shake a different room every half minute.

All the same, no one reacted. Not even those who were rotating stations outside, at the mercy of the sky, seemed to react. Save for an air of mild inconvenience for the lightning strikes. 

“You are so unadorned, my beloved shrike,” the Scarlet King hummed.

What Ire hoped was mostly to himself. Because she certainly had no idea what he wanted her to say in response to that.

His voice was one of the few sounds that could carry over the sounds of the storms outside. In a way, she was grateful for that: it meant that she could hide from anyone else during one of these storms. 

In a way, it only made the coil around her chest grow all the more tight. Was there any hiding from him in his own halls? Or would it be a matter of outlasting him?

She could probably do the later. Maybe. Hopefully? A lot of it depended on how much information she could gather, and how long it’d take to gather all she’d need. Couldn’t all be in one place, either, or it’d draw questions-

A claw traced up the back of her neck, and suddenly she was very aware of every breath she was taking. 

“I really must start finding things to decorate you with.” 

Because the fine silks and cottons weren’t enough. Because for some reason, despite Ire being what could only be described as a brat for the first stint, he actually was willing to accommodate her in a great manner of things. More than she had been expecting, given what little she did know about the ruthless, half-mad god-king from the dark.

Quietly, and only to herself, would she admit that the “generosity” made her very, very afraid. Because she didn’t know what he wanted in turn.

---

-🍁

A shrike is a bird that impales its prey on branches and thorns

Also I think I might've accidentally given your half-dragon my texture issues more than once in here?? oops lol

oooh is the first one quoting my silly quote I made, because if yes that was clever. Who the hell does MC mentioned though. Following up on that - Which deities they know in general in this scenario wtf

The only entertainment Ire has apart from fighting someone in here is by watching others fight apparently. Did we really just call Jeser and Moloch a divorced couple 😭

OMFG IRE MEETS BOB THE FISH

You gave Ire what I knew she would have anyway (considering her inability to eat some foods which is based on both taste and texture + her outfit is constantly made of somewhat similar and familiar materials). Also that's such an interesting petname I actually like it O_o

[mercurial--supernovae]

No one asked for some Bibi / Angel relationship dynamic stuff? Well too bad it's been rotating in my brain so here's a fat post about them anyways.

Fun fact, Bibi does not identify as any set gender nor do they identify as lacking gender. Simply prefers not to use any labels at all as nothing they've come across feels right to them and likes using pronouns interchangeably.

Big Spoon Vs Little Spoon

Bibi 100% prefers being the little spoon, a massive sucker for being held, though their height doesn't make this a common occurrence. Angel doesn't have much of a preference either way but xe liked indulging their partner's preference.

Sharing Clothes

Regrettably Bibi could not fit basically any of Angel's clothes, to compensate for this he would often hand off jackets or t-shirts. Some of which would not in fact be finding its way back to his closet. While not the most accommodating to actually wear, Angel did like the fact they smelled like the other.

Pet Names

Bibi can be downright obnoxious with pet names and nicknames when the mood strikes. Angel was much more tame with any pet names but they did come up often.

Introverted Vs Extroverted

Bibi's a sociable person who prefers being around others a majority of the time and isn't like to have issue in a crowd or talking to strangers. Angel is more of an in between and xe was more likely to change from leaning more one way or another according to mood or situation.

Affection

Bibi struggles to actually sit there and word her feelings let alone come out and say them. Finds it a lot easier to express through actions or gestures. Especially little things. Angel on the other hand has no issue what so ever coming out with the words of affection, though xe expresses affection in other forms as well xe made it a habit to sprinkle the words out there often. Thought Bibi needed to hear them.

Confession

Bibi would have never in a million years have confessed out of fear of rejection and misinterpreting the other's feelings despite everything pointing to the obvious. There was no other way it would have happened. Thankfully, that wasn't much of a problem for Angel. Once xe was sure of the words xe wanted to say and how to go about it.

Oh No It's A Bug

Neither of them are afraid of bugs in the slightest. Angel however would likely actually just squash the bug and be done with it, while Bibi is more likely to catch and release them back outside.

So Who's Driving

Angel refuses to let Bibi behind the wheel. Xe knows what xe's doing. Bibi on the other hand has no license or lessons of any sort. They are completely winging it behind any vehicle's controls, and while miraculously that has yet to result in any actual crashing.. they are also probably one of the most reckless drivers you will ever meet. Traffic laws, roadways, and reasonable speeds be damned.

Dinner Time

Neither can cook for shit, the only thing that gives Bibi a slight edge is you can't fucking burn soup.

Public Displays Of Affection

Bibi isn't against it at all and is inclined to throw out a little here and there. Angel though not outright against it is just weir about it. Like uncomfy with holding hands but perfectly fine half hanging off xyr partner in a shoot out kind of weird.

Protectiveness

Knowing what he knows about Angel he knew xe could handle xemself so Bibi never worried too much. Angel however was painfully aware of the entire government after xyr partner, his cosmic destroyer of a parent with a bad wrap sheet when it comes to her kids, and the various enemies one can possibly make under the world of crime. Xe wanted to protect him from it all, and if xe couldn't do that then fight by his side so he'd never have to face it alone.

Previous Relationships

Angel had never been involved with anyone romantically before Bibi. On the other hand while Bibi has in fact been in other relationships previously none had ever been anything serious or completely genuine.

Horny Jail

Enough said.

Awkwardness

Bibi was constantly nervous about somehow saying or doing the wrong thing to fuck it all up somehow. Big ball of anxious energy about letting someone in this close and perpetually needs reassurance for a while going in. Tries to be cool, does not in fact hold her cool. Angel's awkwardness mostly stems from a weird background and having met the other to begin with through being a government agent specifically sent to capture her. Somehow still manages to be significantly less awkward than xyr partner.

Green With Jealousy

Bibi can get a little too care free and chummy at parties sometimes, especially if under the influence of something any. This tended to put Angel's jealous nature on alert the most. Though both had a habit of getting a little jealous or insecure from time to time even if Angel definitely more so.

How It Happened

Bibi was in no way looking for a relationship of any kind platonic or otherwise when they met, and definitely takes a while to start to warm up let alone develop feelings. While their initial relationship was something of cat and mouse chase, something changed when Angel was about to succeed in xyr mission. Xe saw something different in Bibi that changed xyr mind. After that xe was the one who slowly started trying to get closer and reach out. Though there'd been no romantic intent yet at the time.

Conflict

Minor petty things of no consequence or hurt feeling that were likely one or the other being stubborn were often. Serious arguments were a rarer occurrence. Just very slightly more likely to have been instigated by Bibi between the two of them. It's usually Angel who takes the first step to apologize and try and make up. Xe will usually be ready to forgive once xe has calmed down which takes less time for xem. Bibi will accept apologies and forgiveness when offered, however likely will take a while before it actually stops bothering them and they're over it.

Their Relationship

PDA was already discussed above as was the ways they like to show affection, how protective one or the other is. Both tend to be really good at taking initiative in showing they care, whatever way they choose to and were very dedicated to one another throughout the course of their relationship. Angel was a very independent individual before they met and their relationship didn't change that. Bibi, however had a tendency to get anxious if left alone for long periods of time, though a line of contact during any period of absence did help.

Popularity

Being a member of the government does not make one very popular with the locals. Angel was focused on xyr job more than socializing before going awol and after xe still wasn't the most interested in socializing either or all that great at it for that matter. Bibi, while she didn't yet have the widespread reputation she has now did attend plenty a party and cluband achieve some form of popularity in that.

Caregiving And Relevant Topics To It

Angel is objectively the better caregiver. That was part of how their eventual friendship and beyond started. Xe saw someone who needed help and wanted to be the one to help them. Bibi was a dysfunctional mess when they met that didn't even have a proper home to call their own and had nearly given up on themselves entirely beyond the bare minimum of surviving. Angel slowly taught and encouraged Bibi to pick up the pieces, helped take care of them and fussed till they could do it on their own. Bibi was left in a much better place by the end of their relationship than when Angel first met them. And is overall much more functional now still despite that loss.

Let Me Do The Talking

Angel was better at handling authorities and guards to talk them down, as well as any sort of negotiating. If you need it deescalated or handled more formally xe are who to go to. Bibi was much better at handling anything more personable or that needed to come off more casual and light. The two tried to swap back and forth as needed when working together. Key word being tried as either one could end up talking over one another or only making a situation worse.

Penmanship

Angel writes quick and messy and it only needs to be legible to xyr eyes even if it's an unreadable scrawl to anyone else. The average person can actually read Bibi's handwriting and they put some level of effort into it.

Sensitivity

Bibi was always quick to notice any small detail in behavior that seemed different and would agonize over it internally to no end about what it might mean. Things that Angel might thought nothing of were a big deal to them and it was something they both had to learn how to better accommodate and communicate on both ends as it did cause issues for a while. It also improved over the course of the relationship as Bibi felt more secure in it. Things like Bibi noticed the soap they liked the scent of has been replaced with something different and then spiraling into wondering if Angel got something different as a subtle way to show xe are mad at them. When in reality maybe the store was out of the old kind or xe just wanted to try something different and never thought there was any need to mention it.

Casual Vs Sappy

Their relationship was overall a casual dynamic, but Bibi did like to occasionally try to surprise Angel with sappy romantic gestures and would definitely enjoy any they received in turn.

Butting Heads

Both incredibly stubborn people you'd have a hard time getting to budge when they make a decision. The key difference is Bibi might give you a chance to sway them, but Angel already made up xyr mind the second a decision needed to be made.

Trust

Letting people in requires a level of ready trust and letting people in is not something Bibi does well. Doubt definitely interferes with trust as well. While it doesn't mean there's none there it does mean it's difficult. Angel didn't have many reasons not to trust Bibi even from the start, they're a terrible liar. Though that doesn't mean trusting blindly.

Cluing In

Bibi is definitely actually rather intelligent, learns quickly most of the time and is an excellent multitasker. Actually loves to learn through trial and error and getting their hands busy. Able to create their own plans and gear from scratch and scrap and being self taught in that field. Among other things. Doesn't stop them from being a reckless dumbass at times, nor being somewhat oblivious if you're just dropping hints at them that don't seem clear enough. Angel isn't dumb by any means either though they might not be able to do the things Bibi can.

Tell Me About Yourself

Beyond the whole secret government identity thing and having to keep certain information under wraps because of that Angel is very open and upfront when discussing xemselves, xyr thoughts, or xyr feelings. Bibi on the other hand has a tendency to keep many things to themselves or at least attempts to do so to the best of their ability. Anything that bothers them to be known is an attempted secret kept. Angel already knew their history though, and was always good at reading into the things they tried to hide.

Shy Guy

Neither are exactly the shy type.

Shut Up And Cry

Angel isn't usually one for tears, even in the most dire of situations. Bibi absolutely hates crying, but tears come easy for them and are harder to fight off to more overwhelmed with emotion or upset they are.

Proposal

They never got the chance to get that far.

The One Who'd Die For The Other

Xe did.

[time-to-write-and-suffer]

Indus - Are there any characters or stories you miss writing? Tell us about them!

If I miss writing something I just write it tbh. One thing I do miss is this one ancient WIP I had back in middle school, about this cool not-like-other-girls girl and her enemies-to-lovers romance with a bad boy.

It was so very stupid and obviously I've taken a more speculative turn in my writing nowadays, so I couldn't make it work even if I tried because the characters were so fundamentally high school kids with petty high school kid problems. The reason it was never finished is mostly because I didn't have any ... plot? Just vibes. And it died as I grew up and out of the genre and age demographic in general.

I also miss all my various magic school WIPs. Yes, I've had multiple. I still rotate some ideas in that area around in my brain. Microwaving them on low heat.

OH! Now I remember one I do actually miss, about a college with like ... a bunch of supernaturals? I think I'd just read House of Night and fucking hated it. The MC was some sort of supernatural with no powers (but then it turned out she was suuper powerful because of course) and she had two roommates who hated each other, and then she fell in love with a lovely werewolf himbo she'd had a crush on as a kid, but he had like, a literal angel girlfriend, and one of MC's roommates was werewolf boy's sister who would get super angry if she found out MC had feelings for her (taken) brother, so it was all super messy. Super dumb stuff but I had a genuinely good time writing it so ... kinda miss that feeling, I guess? Rip in piss :')

[boojersey]

☕ fave mcr eras and albums?

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OKAY OKAY I LIKE THIS ONE AND HOPE NO ONE HATES ME FOR MY ORDER BUT

1. revenge (obviously i mean look at me i am drenched in black and red at all times and gerards hair was just so nice) specific parts include flour face gerard and that photoshoot with the blood covering his hand in a building with brick walls and arches it looked like a church basement and the vampire one for kerrang where its a girls back and theyre covered in blood and hes biting her neck hehe, reasoning for it being my favorite is it has only one song i skip (ghost of you) and every other has a lot more that i usually do and just how theatric and dramatic but also edgy everything was, tbp is more theatric BUT theres more Hope vibes and this is that but with despair and blood and guns and coffins and that just appeals to me fundamentally way more especially when im in my bag. it probably has my most favorite songs too, like to the end cemetery drive jetset life and HANG EM HIGH OR MOTHERFUCKING DIE. maybe my favorite mcr song but im not thinking too hard when i say that

pic of my closet below lmao two of my favorite drawings ive done (theyre for sale wink wink! dm me if interested anyone, gerard is blacklight reactive)

2. bullets, its just so suburban i feel like I'm back in Jersey its October and im walking past cul de sacs and the sunset is bright fucking orange its fantastic its art in every sense and its full of sorrow bc its the closest album chronologically to 9/11 and gerard had the least sureness in the future but he was so confident and it just bleeds into everything so hard, my favorite moments in life are majorly moments similar to what i described. wearing a hoodie and jeans and converse and observing the way the streetlights color the concrete and asphalt, especially if theres been rain. chinese food from family restaurants and rolling rock beer and sitting at neighborhood playgrounds on the swingset rocking back and forth with the carbonation buzzing in your brain. favorite moments include the pic of frank and gerard smoking on pool chairs and that pic of them in some grandmas house with wooden walls and a china and tchotchke cabinet and lace curtains and im pretty sure mikeys sitting on the leg of a couch.it was my desktop bg for a year or two.

3. black parade; i really appreciate the death topic and i will admit i struggle to get on the Hope wavelength throughout esp in famous last words ykno the keep on living part but there are some of my favorite fucking demos like emily and all the angels and im Pretty surE desert song but smack my ass and call me a moron if its wrong. i will say visually other than the marching band outfits its the least interesting era, the white hair was just kinda there to me and no one else had anything outstandingly russling my jimmies. frank did have some cute hair curls on his bangs tho sometimes. i do rlly like the whole haunted vibe tho bc of the paramounts effect on them tho, when i notice it in songs and lyrics it is pretty effective in makin my spine straighten with the hollow eyed, sleepless and frankly a little scared nervous energy. house of wolves has been in my rotation the past month or so bc it reminds me of trevor gta a lot. wttbp i skip every time just about. i save that song for when people are trying to be emo allies and queue it on the aux or when it comes on the radio or in public. blood is AMAZING and reminds me a lot of the song air from the hair soundtrack, and i wonder if gerard was trying to specifically mimic that songs vibe because if u ask me thats very gerard. i think overall the concept and the lore of the album's fruition appeal to me more than anything else, i also love mother war and some of the other various character designs.

4. current era; im saying this because foundations of decay is literally that promising of a single and the shows' outfits are so wonderful and the energy and love and happiness is just so fucking palpable that i already know this is where the new album is gonna sit for me. its gonna be so fucking good. we all know this so well. favorites include nurse gerard the mikey fuckin way shirts and that slicked back hair gerard mmf yum

5. danger days; im SORRRY i just. the songs only appeal to me on a surface level aside from destroya and i always just get rlly bad feelings when i see pics of gerard bc i know he said he was starving himself and it makes me :/ more than anything else seeing him. i feel Bad saying he looked hot. this is also the only album with songs i actively dislike within. i will say that when i say i like destroya. i fucking Love destroya. its so good its so fucking good its everything to me. OH and im gonna include the killjoys comic in this and say that even though i love it so fucking much its not enough to put it above current era. its not that i dislike danger days. its that every other era is so strong compared in my mind that since something has to be last it will be this. favorite moments include the videos of them behind the scenes for na na na laughing and having fun the photoshoot with the backdrop where they're all underneath it and gerard looks like a fucking otherworldly being level insane like hes made of porcelain and the mv shots of them in the trans am at night especially going in the tunnel speeding ass out of town. i will add that i discovered mcr thru sing bc it was on a rhythm game i owned at 11 and i still remember the two days before mcr broke up when i finally remembered to give them a listen and openly cried watching them all die in the killjoy vids so theres a nostalgic rawness that part of me wants to leave preserved like an artifact at a museum.

anyway novel over those are my full thoughts on the mcr eras

things i didnt mention that i shouldve include the bat buckle the infamous stage kiss the spitting and gerard palming his cock through his jeans on stage lmao

oh also dewees is great and needs more recognition

[sunevial]

Moving Day

This is once again another case of ‘not exactly a commission, but someone chucking money at me to eventually write about space and magic gays’, except this time, it’s from @hewhowalksbehind. 

Continuation of this.

---

Of all the things Venny missed most about Ylxret at nine thirty in the goddamn morning, it was automated coffee makers. Blearily pouring water down the little spout and pushing entirely too many shiny buttons, she eventually got the machine to start blinking. With a grumble, she slotted a floral patterned mug under the funnel and slumped against the counter. 

Water was boiling, oatmeal was in the new saucepan, spoon was in the sink, bowls were…

She forgot to buy bowls. 

Fuck a duck. 

Groaning, she pressed her hands to her eyes and let out a long sigh. After a shopping trip that must’ve lasted an eternity, she had been running on fumes by the time she had a chance to pass out last night, but apparently even that wasn’t enough to calm her adrenaline addled brain. Her best guess was that she hadn’t fallen asleep until three, and even that was a generous estimate. To add insult to injury, her first night in her new apartment was plagued by restless dreams, fitful tossing and turning, and a blanket that was neither warm or cool enough.

At least the air mattress was comfortable. 

The air mattress was comfortable, and her new plush corgi was cuddly.

A steady drip of liquid gold splashed into the mug, the warm coffee revealing heat activated yellow and white circuitry lines weaving through the painted-on flowers. Not even bothering with milk or sugar, she downed the coffee fast enough to get away with only minor tongue burns and shoveled down instant oatmeal straight from the pot. Throwing both into the sink to wash up later, she scrambled into the shower just long enough to wash off yesterday’s sweat and rub away the smell of what felt like seven layers of deodorant. A fresh change of clothes later, a practical t-shirt and legging combo, and she felt half-way to being a functioning person again.

Which was really convenient considering that things would start arriving in approximately now.

Grabbing both wallet and keys, she quietly slipped out of her room and padded downstairs to the front lobby. Today was Internet access, a ‘do it yourself’ table and chair set, and the cushions for her couch. The couch itself was tomorrow, along with the bedframe and mattress, and the nightstand and dresser wouldn’t be for another week yet. Thankfully, unlike her very much not present bowls, she had remembered to buy a toolkit, so at the very least she would have somewhere else to sit by the end of today.

A quick peek outside confirmed that the Internet people hadn’t arrived yet, so Venny plopped down on one of the lobby couches and quickly scanned for any available wireless hotspots. It would’ve been laughably easy to tap into a password protected connection with a couple waves of her hand, but she knew better than to bum off someone. It was also probably very illegal. 

Eventually, she got ahold of a weak signal from the coffee shop next door, and her com link lit up with a happy beep. Her eyes flashed back and forth as she redirected the electrical signals within the device, ensuring that this much weaker and simpler form of wireless communication would end up being compatible. When she was fairly certain that it wouldn’t be running at a snail’s pace, she pulled and weaved the software code until the screen lit up and the holoprojector displayed a rotating band of images. Smiling triumphantly, she tapped on her email, she still had a hard time believing Toven still used email, and sifted through the various messages she had gotten over the past day or so.

Confirmation from her Internet provider, spam, start day and paperwork for work, coupon for shampoo, more spam…updated delivery day for her larger furniture?

“Due to upgrades in processing time, your order will instead be delivered today around ten AM, we hope to see you then,” she muttered under her breath, suppressing a loud groan and rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. On the one hand, she’d have an actual bed by the end of the day if everything went right. On the other hand, this was one more group of people to talk with and one more group of things to do, and she was not convinced that all of the coffee in the world would make either of those things easier. Not much she could reasonably do about that, though, because her damn couch was coming whether she was awake enough to realize it or not. 

Whatever happened next didn’t seem to follow the proper passage of time. Sometimes it moved breathtakingly fast, other times painstakingly slow. All Venny could register through her brain-addled eyes was a never ending blur of paper signing, hauling packages, and telling people she had never met to put things down wherever they could find open space. By the time the last person was out of her apartment, and she could actually gauge the passage of time, it was exactly eleven twenty-four in the morning. She collapsed onto one of the new cushions, a nice olive green that she definitely didn’t remember picking out, and got to thinking.

Assets: She had Internet access that wasn’t siphoned off the coffeeshop.

Consequences: Her apartment was no longer able to accommodate carpet angels. 

Priority one: Bed needed to be set up. She’d like an actual bed.

Priority two: Get the couch out of the center of the living room.

Priority three: Actually build the table so she could eat without standing up.

Problem: She had the energy to do maybe half of the bed set up. 

Slowly getting back onto her feet, she shuffled towards the bedroom, though not before noticing her front door still propped wide open from all of the deliveries. She went to close it, getting about halfway there before the door across the hall opened, revealing Sol’s relatively incredulous face. 

“Morning,” she said, leaning against the doorframe and stifling a yawn. “Lot of noise over there for a weekend morning.”

“That makes two of us,” Venny replied, trying to put on as apologetic an expression as she could muster. “I didn’t wake either of you up, did I?”

She shook her head, lavender curls bouncing a little. “Nah, I’ve been up for a bit, and Clarissa could sleep through a hurricane if you let her.”

“Still gonna apologize,” Venny said, breathing a sigh of relief and laughing a touch. “You know, I didn’t think most furniture places delivered on weekends.”

“Learn something new everyday.” Her eyes glanced towards Venny’s now incredibly messy apartment for a moment. “You settling in okay?”

Venny chuckled, tapping the ground absentmindedly with a foot. Well, she could answer truthfully, she could answer in the socially acceptable way, or she could split it down the middle and hope for the best. “I think so, just need to get used to...all of this.”

“It’s not easy moving somewhere new, even harder when you’re all alone,” Sol said with a sympathetic smile, nodding her head and crossing her arms over her chest. “If you need help getting set up, I’m not really doing anything today.”

Venny blinked a couple of times, shaking her head even as every fiber of her being was saying ‘take up the offer’. As much as she’d love another pair of hands helping out, she’d already taken up enough of Sol’s time between the reading interruption and the grocery care package. Best not to take advantage of her kindness this many times in such a short period of time. Or maybe Sol didn’t care, that she just actually wanted to help and didn’t resent her for it, and this was just a combination of sleep deprivation and anxiety talking. Maybe it was both. It was probably both. “I think I’ve got it handled,” she replied, twirling a twist between her fingers. “Thanks for the offer though.”

All she got in return was an incredulously raised eyebrow.

“Or maybe I’m saying that because I don’t want to take advantage of your kindness again and seem really needy in a time of upheaval and stress,” Venny said with a defeated sigh.

“I wouldn’t be offering it if I didn’t wanna help.” Sol smirked just a touch. “I know my boundaries better than that.”

Venny could physically feel the tension in her muscles drain away as she slumped against her own door frame. “I promise I’m not this pathetic all of the time.”

“You said it yourself, a lot of upheaval and stress, and from what it sounds like, absolutely no sleep either,” she replied with a shrug, popping back into her own apartment long enough to grab her keys and phone. “Alright, where are we starting?”

 “Bedroom, cause I need a bed.”

The two of them quickly made their way to the chaotic bedroom, surveying the bed frame in its various parts and the mattress propped up against the window. Cracking open the new tool box, Sol set to work screwing everything into place while Venny sorted through a veritable hoard of metal rods and support beams. While she had no reason to doubt that Sol could wield a hammer and screwdriver, watching her work was, in a word, beautiful. Sol took to the various tools with a clear familiarity, handling them with delicacy and certainty as she aligned the wooden frame. Venny knew nothing about art, but she knew an artist’s touch.

“You’re pretty good at this,” Venny said, holding a level against the wood to see if any holes needed a quick re-drill or if something had been screwed in the wrong place.

“I’d hope so, I make things for a living,” Sol replied, wiping a little sweat off her brow.

“What kind of things?”

Sol returned with a playful smile. “You get three guesses.”

She allowed thirty seconds to come up with her answers, no small feat with how slow her brain was chugging along. “Artisanal woodworking.”

“Nope.”

“Artisanal metalworking.”

“Nope.”

“Designing prototypes for this exact style of bed frame,” Venny said with a shit eating grin that was probably more of a result of her being half way to slap happy. 

Sol rolled her eyes, closing one as she carefully twisted the last screw into place. “Okay, I’ll admit, second one was closer.”

“So what is it?”

“You’re not gonna believe me,” Sol said flatly, tapping the frame twice for good measure.

Venny pouted, planting her elbows on the footboard and resting her chin on her fists. “Come on, it can’t be that out there.”

“I promise I’m not joking.”

“You could say you build rocket ships and I’m so tired I’d believe you.”

Sol paused for almost ten full seconds. “Funny you mention that…”

“Get out, you make spaceships?” Venny’s head poked over the frame with eyes wide and excitement clear as day on her lips. “You’re with the Wisteria Space Program?”

“Technically I’m in the rocketry department, not the spaceship program, but same idea,” Sol said with a shrug, jumping to her feet and whistling. Similar to yesterday, the wind kicked up, swirling around the room almost as if it was having fun. The mattress slowly but surely floated off the ground, providing just enough lift for the two of them to set it on the frame without straining muscles or having to worry about wingspans. 

“Still, that’s so cool,” Venny continued, grabbing the sheets off of her air mattress and throwing them onto the bed. “I don’t even think I know anyone back home who does that. What do you even do there?”

Sol laughed, grabbing the sheet and stretching it over a corner. “I’d tell you, but that’s classified.”

“Is that a joke or is that actually classified?”

“‘I might actually get arrested for treason’ classified,” Sol said in a completely serious deadpan.

“Anything you can tell me?” Venny asked, head tilted as her hands quickly smoothed out her blue and white comforter over the bed.

Sol thought for a full minute, arranging pillows and plushies absentmindedly as she paced around the small room. The wind followed her, catching her shirt and blowing it in every direction imaginable, almost as if it was thinking alongside her. “Physics. Lots of physics.”

“Dang.”

A knock sounded at the door, and for the second day in a row, Venny opened it to find Clarissa standing there with a large smile on her face. She had no gifts in hand this time around, but she was scrolling through her phone. “Sol texted me she was here helping out, you done stealing my roommate? I need her for something of vital importance.”

“I offered,” Sol called as she emerged from the bedroom.

“She still stole you!” Clarissa shouted back, though with a laugh and smile on her face. 

Venny returned with a grin of her own. “We should be done pretty soon. Though if it’s really that important, I can take care of the rest.”

“It’s not important, she’s just trying to get me to set up a dating app,” Sol said with a sigh and an accusatory finger. “Because my roommate is a nosy bitch who insists on setting me up with every girl she happens to meet.”

“It’s not every girl.” Clarissa huffed indignantly.

Sol’s face told a much different story with how frustrated those eyebrows looked. “You’ve specifically set me up with three of your exes, a girl from your class, and the florist down the street.”

“All I’m saying is that she’s got a great personality and an even better ass.”

“Then why don’t you ask her out?!” Sol exclaimed, throwing up her hands.

“Because I’m already seeing two people!”

It might have just been Venny’s ears, but she swore she heard laughing from somewhere else in the apartment. 

“Alright, alright, you can have your roommate back,” Venny said, holding back a belly laugh as best as she could. Never in her life had she’d been so grateful to hear two women loudly arguing about female love interests. Her family had been concerned with her moving to Toven, knowing that not every place was as accepting of non-heterosexual identities as Ylxret. New Haven had a better track record than most, though, and conditions were certainly getting better as time went on. If nothing else, seeing her two neighbors argue about sapphic love affairs in the hallway was a good indicator that she had nothing to worry about here. “Hope the app set up goes well.” 

“I’m not setting up the app,” Sol declared with a flat tone, going over to the boxed up table and cutting away tape like a woman scorned. “I’ll get a date on my own damn time.”

“I mean, if you’re looking for someone else to add to the list, I’m into women,” Venny joked, smiling at Clarissa. She watched the pink haired woman’s eyes light up, and hastily threw up her hands. “Not that I’m looking for a relationship, I’ve just moved and I think that might’ve been me not having normal social barriers up due to lack of sleep.”

Sol audibly groaned in the background. “Damn it, you’ve given her ideas.”

“Well that’s even better! You’re new in town and need to see the sights, and I know a great little place Sol could take you for lunch,” Clarissa said, pulling out her phone and rapidly texting. “I’m sending you the directions now.”

Venny blinked a couple of times, finally just realizing the full ramifications of what she had just done. At least she knew now never to open her mouth when she was this sleep deprived, or at least, not do so when possible romantic relationships were involved. Feeling the heat rapidly rising to her face, she shot a glance to Sol, desperately trying to find a way out of this increasingly awkward situation. 

With a sigh, Sol pulled out her phone and rubbed her temples. “I’m really sorry about this.”

“Don’t be, it’s my fault,” Venny said, smiling sheepishly. “I’m really not in the place to be thinking about that anyways.”

“Then think of it like a friendly social,” Clarissa said with a large, not at all innocent smile, eyes darting first to Venny. “You need to meet people-” Her eyes flashed towards her roommate. “-and you need to get out more. Win-win situation!”

Sol’s eyes narrowed in challenge. “Clarissa-”

“Venny, what do you think?” she asked, smiling wide and oh so sweet. So this was a game for them both, a sort of give and take war between them, and this is the moment where she was supposed to choose a side. Her next move decided the winner of this match between these two equally stubborn individuals. 

She was already on the edge of the diving board, might as well take the jump.

“What’s the food like?” Venny asked, putting on her best innocent smile. 

Sol sighed in defeat, grumbling and pulling out her phone. “Stir fry and dumplings. Let me know when you’re free.”

Clarissa grinned with a smile that could split the sea. “It’s a date!”

[babyspacebatclone]

I am taking this as a sign that I deserve to not-so-humble brag about work today, because for most of the day I effortlessly applied this philosophy and yes I deserve to celebrate it!

Under the cut, of course. I’m still polite.

Ok, my day. Oh, Stars Explode, my day…

I work, of course, at a day care. Last week, one of our (fully vaccinated) teachers in the Toddler room got a positive COVID test, which shut down the room for a week and prevented all affected children/staff and their family members from coming until it reopened and negative tests were provided.

(get your booster when you can, people! delta is not a joke!)

This made for a quiet week for the rest of us, because this represented a full half of the center all told. Reopened today, Wednesday, so I knew to expect craziness today.

*broken laugher* I was naïve.

I have my morning routine down to where I get out the door in 15 minutes from final wake-up, and have a breakfast bar at my 10 minute break. On the other hand, I have an hour and a half of alarms to get me prepared for actually getting out of bed.

Which was good, because an hour before that “final bed warning” point the owner of my Day Care center calls me.

*small sob*

At the moment, there are two sister centers on opposite ends of town under our owners. I work at the sane one, and the other has been struggling due to non-COVID health issues affecting the director.

So the owner’s wife, the former director of that center and now Executive Director of the centers has been covering. Let’s just say she’s 95% of the total brains of their relationship. Her husband think’s is 40/60 in his favor.

Imagine how fun it is to work for him. Fortunately, my Center (the sane one) had a competent Director who doesn’t see employees as malfunctioning robots.

Owner’s wife has tested positive for COVID. Owner is in “quarantine” (we wish), but at least is staying out of the rooms.

Then half the staff at the other center, on top of this, are sick for various reasons.

*deep breath*

So I, the closest thing to an experienced “extra” staff left in this mess, am being asked to head over to help the grand total of three staff left on site (closest thing relating to “extra,” I really ain’t, licensing staff ratios be damned, my room needs two staff to function…).

An hour early, as mentioned half a day ago above.

Anyway, the morning actually goes really well. This center’s version of “problem children” in the preschool room are the equivalent of “moderately decent” kids in my room (baseline: they immediately take a break when told, instead of having to be carried to the appropriate area and sat with).

Eventually I move over to their Toddler room because ratio (to explain: x kids per staff, as legally required by my state). By my standards these Toddlers are angels, so it’s all good!

(why does the “sane” center have the problem kids? well, I have two theories. one is that the other center is the “showcase” center, and with the owner’s wife on-site is actually listened to when the kids consistently try to break teachers. The other is this center can’t handle problem kids, so when the owner still wants them paying they get shipped to us, because our staff actually have backbones.)

(I favor the latter because I’ve literally watched it happen multiple times. I hate the owner. I know for a fact the owner also doesn’t listen to my director about kids she doesn’t want to say, so it’s both, just mostly the latter)

Anyway…

Day was going good! Transitioning to art, sponge painting, the kids all start to sit nicely, when..

“Who threw up?”

It is immediately obvious who threw up.

And now we get to “solutions, not problems.” I’ve visited this center before, so I know/recognize half of the kids, but barely.

Nevertheless, I immediately swoop into art duties, rotating out kids as spots free up and washing hands at the extra sink while the bathroom is occupied with biohazard clean up.

It’s not even conscious. My lead teacher needs to focus on the sick kid, my job is to keep the room good until that’s done.

Which takes an hour, because the single parent doesn’t answer calls from either the lead or the owner’s wife (from home) as we try ti figure out how to get this now lethargic, miserable toddler home.

So I start reading stories. When they get antsy, the Lead turns on the cd player for me and I lead dance (since outside time is now out of the question).

Just keep the kids moving, happy, focus ok what’s working so the people who have to can focus on what’s not.

And I feel good.

If you’ve read my other rants, you know I’ve gotten PTSD from another caregiving-based job. One of my legit, based on acute incidents and chronic gaslighting from that company, is “Not feeling in control in the caregiving situation.”

Not today. Today I have enough solutions to fill the time before nap, even lunch, and we’ll get through this.

😊

The afternoon broke me, though, but I expected that. An hour and a half alone in the baby room (having returned to my usual center, so my own babies even), with four babies between seven weeks and seven months.

Right when everyone is going to want a bottle.

Lots of crying. Another trigger for mw…

Ah, well, can’t win them all.