#but at least i'm making dinner. at least
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maybe i won't get to practice tonight. but at least. i made myself dinner
#extremely low effoet dinner. which meant. throwing some leftover sausage and kale and shredded cheese on top of tortilla chips#and throwing them in the toaster over for a while#but. dinner nonetheless#ugh. i know i'm not gonna have more energy when i come home from work tomorrow either#and i really need to practice#but. idk. man i'm just tired#too many things happening all at once#and it's not gonna slow down. i just need to catch up#but at least i'm making dinner. at least#i wanna talk about me
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sudden yearning for time travelling teen jiang fengmian lands at lotus pier fic that winds up being about a perfectly nice kid having a varying series of "oh no. i don't like that. that's a lot" reactions.
#i think in order for this to be satisfying i have to give grace and interiority to teenmian#i'm picturing an older teen like 18ish? maybe even early 20s?#big crush on csr he's already pretty sure isn't going to work out#but at least he'll always have wei-xiong#anyway this is my ploy to give jfm a chance at an ugly crying meltdown#he's trying so hard to be even keeled and like#maybe take this as an evil vision designed to teach him something#but somewhere in between my crush stole my man and then they died#my whole sect burned#my grown ass son who is older than me making the vibe sooooo weird#and my grandson! child of my dead???? daughter??????#is just like yeah he never talks about you. no never never#and then wwx blows into town and idk somehow they all end up at dinner together and jfm politely calls lqr a punk ass bitch in front of lwj#because what???? context clues suggest lqr has the fucking nerve to not like wei xiong's baby after All That#only for adult son with the weird vibes#to imply only filial piety is keeping him from naming the real#punk ass bitch#anyway this ends with jfm crying because clearly he marries yuanyuan and she HATES HIM and then his own son ALSO HATES HIM#and would rather stupid Lan-er-gongzi#be his dad.#if you like lqr so much why don't you just join the lan sect then?????#and that's how jc learns he didn't get it all from his mama#jc didn't mean it he was stressed! this isn't his dad it's an a-ling sized kid. but it's still stressful
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A very happy birthday to an absolute menace, my beloved gremlin child, a truly special baby boy! May the 4th be with you!
A special thank you to @detshin, who is a true inspiration and partner in crime, who allowed me to draw this companion piece to her beautiful work of art (that you should totally check out if you haven't yet), bless you dearest💕
#detective conan#dcmk#meitantei conan#名探偵コナン#edogawa conan#fanart#the detective gremlin#detco posting#my stuff#i'M currently too tired to ramble but god i have so much to ramble about#i will totally make a separate post for rambling purposes later when my brain won't feel like it's smoking#happy birthday to this child who fckin took over my life#also you get 2 pictures bc one is made with phone camera#and the other is taken by an actual camera#hence the very different quality#but i couldn't decide which one to pick... at least i narrowed it down to two#ok i'm hitting post and then gonna have dinner bc i haven'T really eaten since breakfast (says me at 19:31 lmao)
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Photo
🧟♀️🦇 Monster Tea Party ☕💀
#ts4#the sims#the sims 4#simblr#I know it's 7:15 am but here we are#I've been up since 2#so i figured i'd work on something#simblr i'm begging you to not let this flop because it took ages haha#i had to hunt down a bunch of CC#make poses#decorate the room#I shot everything then didn't like the lighting because it was day time so i had to wait until night and redo it#It has to get at least 10 notes or i'm leaving#tea and heads for dinner what more could you ask for
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Catch me shoving an ung-dly amount of plain, salted bread in my mouth while panicking about pesach
#jumblr#jewish conversion#jew by choice#personal thoughts tag#there is no way i'm going to be able to remember what is chametz 😥😬#this year i'm not 'actually' observing but i want to make a genuine effort#so my plan is to absolutely not consume anything i /know/ to be chametz (e.g. my plain salted bread)#it seems like i'll be eating a lot of potatoes this year though....#i'm going to see if coconut oil can cook well with this because afaik that is kosher for pesach#but again my overall goal is to make a genuine effort even if it isn't completely adherent to the expectations#this is basically a practice level for the real deal so i do want to make sure i actually try#and that my attitude isn't 'im not even going to bother trying or learning because i'm not even a jew yet 🙄'#at least i know what i'm having for dinner????
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Let it be known that when I loaded up my NV saves from 2018 Arcade's inventory was spare glasses, a pack of cigarettes, and every pre-war book in the wastes.
#personal#Dr. JSA turning to his companion and handing him every book they come across.#also given they're both wearing glasses they'd be fools not to pick up every pair they come across#the ones that match their prescriptions at least#Also- J might not have as much of an interest in socioeconomics as Arcade does but I'm sure getting him to summarize books handed to him#makes for a good downtime over dinner activity while traveling#fallout
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skyglow:
(alternative title: photo dump of a midnight desert run)
#photography#Ford's Art#color says shit#it was either go on a twelve mile run or re-download grindr and get absolutely blasted so I went with the more responsible option.#b because damn I'm feeling it tonight. or at least I was before the run. I need to shower and then I'll cook dinner and go to bed satiated.#I did also jerk off under the bridge and then piss on someone's flowers on the way home. gotta get those animal instincts out somehow right?#anyway I've successfully vented most of my manic energy and a cold shower will finish it off and then we're good.#the mood meds have been helping a lot. last time I got hit with this kind of a mood I came out of it with huge bite marks and chlamydia.#and I haven't been feeling it nearly as bad this time so that's nice. more like a restless dog and less like a caged wolf thirsty for blood.#yes I'm making references to Call of the Wild again deal with it.#anyway sorry to anyone who sees this from the tags and not because you follow me. you didn't sign up for this lmao.#also. this is why I can't be a binary trans woman. this night photography shit is the most gay-man thing ever and I enjoy it.#I was doing it before my last boyfriend but he got me even more into it.#anyway bye I'm gonna go shower and then eat food. I've been hungrier more recently.#between the meds and the hrt my appetite is bigger and I'm gaining weight with the hrt fat redistribution which is cool and good.#I want to be a healthy weight and maybe even a lil chonky? we'll see we'll see.
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It is so hard for me to just let go of tasks I've delegated and I am being so so brave right now.
#I did end up making two extra cakes because no one had planned dessert#I already let go of the dinner aspect even though it is absolutely not what I would have done at all#(they are just getting sams club pizzas and I am so courageous)#also I'm worried they won't bring enough punch#and I don't know if anyone is making a non-spiked punch#gritting my teeth and trying NOT to make extra punches#'Doc I wonder if this is why you sometimes get stressed out have tried letting things go' FIRST OF ALL HOW DARE YOU#dear mother I cannot delegate#some dumb greek bitch has overcome me with longinbg for everything to be perfect or at least my fault
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Walking Far From Home | The Untamed
CHAPTER TEN
Summary:
Our two travelers arrive in a remote town that appears to be a perfectly nice and ordinary place. Surely nothing will go wrong here. Surely.
Notes:
New chapter in a startlingly short interval! Wow! This trend will almost certainly not continue, not least because something else I'm writing has a deadline. (But then, nothing spurs writing productivity like procrastination on something you should be doing.)
Relatively short this time because I needed to break it up somewhere or else it was going to be way too long. But that means the next chapter will be coming sooner! And there's some actual plot here! Surprise!
Thank you to my lovely beta, as always; thank you all of you readers for your kindness and continuing to follow along on this journey.
#song lan#xue yang#a wild fic appeared#walking far from home#annnnd i'm off to make dinner and not check my email for comints for at least an hour
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It's a good sign I'm recovering from my creative slump that I was able to brainstorm a story that makes me laugh.
#all it took was one shot from the disney batb#beast made a face that was very expressive of the man underneath#and a retelling started forming as a cheerful version of the beast started chattering at me#lovely man#doesn't know how to shut up#it's a major issue between himself and his beauty#(who is introverted and serious and a bit cranky)#he insists on telling the story to his children#despite my doubts that he'll be an objective or honest narrator to these young ears#and even then he refuses to tell me most of the story#all i've got is his first dinner with beauty (did not go well)#and i'm like 'how did she go from that to wanting to marry you?'#and he's like 'i'm just irresistibly charming'#and i'm like 'clearly not because you just told me how she resisted you. why did she change her mind?'#and he's like 'idk. lack of options? i'm just thrilled it happened i'm not self-aware enough to figure out why'#and i'm all 'can you at least tell me what you did? it can't just be that you had long boring days in the palace#'and then she suddenly fell in love'#and he's like 'but what if it did happen that way though?'#and i'm like 'make something up! i don't want people to fall asleep reading this'#and he's like 'sorry can't help'#so i try to talk to beauty but she doesn't want to talk to strangers so i'm stuck#but what i do have is a very hopeful sign of returning creative health#for some reason even though i have a jillion batb ideas#the funny ones are the only ones i get interested in enough to actually write#we'll see if this becomes one of them#adventures in writing
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// Finally, a day off. These past 7 work days weren't even busy; just the fact I had to train the new girl (who is very, very sweet and catching on fast) was a tad exhausting. I can't really... move around and write and do as I wish.
So, hopefully, I can spend today catching up, because my queue is about to run out. 😬 I'll be around in a bit.
#(( annoyingly... they shoved a work day in between my routine two days off.#so I'm off today. work tomorrow. off Wednesday. mind you... we're not busy tomorrow.#it irks me when they do this. 😭 just give me my two days off in a row#or at least put more days in between to make it make actual sense. bleh.#anyways it's my husband's b-day so I'll be away for an hour or so for dinner.#then I'll be around! hope everyone is having a lovely day! ))#;; oh jeeze what now? ( ooc )#;; tbd
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You ever finish a drawing that you really like and then you spend the next three days randomly looking at it for minutes at a time like that could make it possible for you to absorb its alluring and magnetic essence with your eyes
#this is me with my icon rn. also this is silly but yeah it really feels like that#i experienced the same thing but even more intensely back in february with the short comic i made then#and then also with some of the paintings i made during my painting course days#admiring the colors and lighting on this mundane green bottle. why not#honestly this might be the first time in my life when i'm making things and i sometimes end up actually liking them fully#no little extra gripes with it that could ruin it. i just like the thing as it is. love it even. it's exactly as it should be#this feeling is one of the top things that make drawing and overall at least attempting to make art worth it#i also wonder if anyone else experiences this thing where the image of a certain character stays in your sort of visual imagination sphere#like the thing becomes associated with everything that happens at that time. the music i listen to etc#it almost feels like i sort of AM this thing. like. spiritually#ok this is hard to explain without sounding kind of odd LMAO#it's just that i've never seen anyone express this exact sentiment. with seeing the character in your minds eye sorta#i mean hmmmm. ofc fursonas and all different types of sonas and such exist. re: the identification thing#i actually find the concept of an 'avatar' as something that represents you (in a digital setting mostly) really intriguing#it was actually one of the things i seriously considered as the subject of my bachelor's thesis#but yeah ok i'm just saying this so that you all know that i AM that little purple kitty holding a heart. btw#ok i'm going to go eat dinner now. don't mind me and my strange long-winded monologues#goosepost
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i told myself oh i should see how far i am into one piece as a whole. make myself a little progress bar episode wise and
... anyway
#oh my god i'm not even halfway through it#372 episodes farther than i was at this point last year at least! (was not watching lmao)#ok i think i'm gonna make dinner and then try to like. marathon the rest of thriller bark#wish me luck 🫡#kate watches op
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I wish I was not an unintelligent manchild.
#Vent#I wish I had interests that were properly 'adult'#I wish I didn't like being surrounded by toys and trinkets and games and comics.#I wish my room looked like how you'd expect an adult's room to look#I wish my art was refined. I wish I worked in mediums that were considered respectable to the average person.#I wish I could read. I mean like I really wish I could focus and read a book above a high school reading level. And properly disect it.#I wish I dressed properly. Plainly.#I wish I could feel comfortable surrounded by muted colors.#I wish I didn't enjoy obnoxious music.#I wish I didn't cling to things that reminded me of my childhood.#I wish I could be just like a normal adult office worker who was able to socialize properly and went to the gym#And then would go home and cook myself dinner and read and then go to sleep.#And I would still be miserable. I'd still be undesirable. But at least I'd be normal. I'd probably hate myself less. I'd be more respectabl#Why didn't I ever grow up. Why. What's wrong with me.#Why did I get a weird job. Why do I want weird things. Why am I weird.#Maybe if I was normal I could make fun of adults who have weird interests and get rid of the awful fucking pit in my stomach#Maybe I'd be marginally less miserable because at least my life is put together and at least I'm normal.#And I wouldn't have to waste time and money and energy doing weird things like going to conventions#(I was going to add to that but I rarely leave the house as is)#Instead I would just talk at the water cooler and otherwise think insightfully and deeply. Be a proper philosopher or something.#And with a better more normal job I'd have the money to be a philanthropist too#And I wouldn't bother anyone#And I DEFINITELY wouldn't be FLAPPING MY FUCKING HANDS WHEN I GET EXCITED#OR SINGING UNDER MY BREATH RANDOMLY WITHOUT REALIZING IT#OR BITING MY NAILS OR TAPPING MY FINGERS OR LISTENING TO MUSIC SO LOUD I CAN FEEL IT IN MY CHEST#I WOULDNT BE BOUNCING MY FUCKING LEG#I WOULD BE *FUCKING NORMAL*.
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not the emperor asking if the son he neglected all these years blames him for doing so 😭😭
i feel like i've seen this question being asked in another drama (i don't remember which one) but it's a similar situation where the "sick" son helps the emperor out with some court affair and the emperor is impressed and asks that question
it's so funny bc what is the son gonna say?? yes i think you're the worst dad ever but i've gotten used to it now so just gimme the throne bitch????
ofc not,, he's gonna say, "no dad i don't blame you bc ik you've been busy with court affairs" like a good, obedient, throne-wanting son
and then the emperor is gonna sigh out of relief bc thank fuck he doesn't have to take responsibility for being a shitty father
#but plot twist: the son does blame the emperor for neglecting him all these years?????#BUT another plot twist: the emperor knew the son blamed him for neglecting him all these years and already took precautions against him???#at least in this drama i'm assuming he did? idk we'll see#rav's watching: love you seven times#if this doesn't make any sense it's i've used up all my brain cells trying to make dinner today rip
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as a general rule, on average, if americans consistently complain about a food being conceptually weird, gross, and scary, then it probably tastes amazing. or at least inoffensive.
this is because in my experience americans for the most part (give or take a few exceptions by region) think eating literally anything other than beef, chicken, bread, eggs, peanut butter jelly sandwitches, ketchup, and disgusting cloyingly artificial brown sludge soda is insurmountably weird, gross, and scary.
#a lot of people literally refuse to even eat ham or pork#not even for like religious or health reasons#just because they think eating anything but beef and chicken is 'weird and scary and gross'#every time i hear people going on en masse about how 'weird and an acquired taste' something foreign is i go and try it and i'm just like#what the fuck were all of you smoking. where is the unbearable weirdness i am supposed to be experiencing#shoutout to that time i kept hearing about how bizarre a flavor milkis soda is and how intimidating and acquired of a taste#then when i actually try the stuff. it's just fucking peach soda. it's peach soda with a faint tangy yogurtish taste. it makes good floats.#how in the absolute fuck is anything even remotely weird much less gross about this?#unless your concept of what a 'soda' should be is poisoned by a lifetime of the entire soda aisle being filled with nothing but brown sludg#from the same 3 brands that all taste like what would happen if they could distill the concept of diabetes and artificial flavoring syrup#i don't know if other countries have this but there's this weird cultural like mandatory rejection of any 'unusual' food here#way more intense than i've seen from anyone from any other country (though that might just be inexperience with other cultures talking)#people react to the mere suggestion of any food outside a very narrow range with outright disgust and genuine fear and horror#and there's a huge amount of unspoken peer pressure on everyone to also do the same#like you're expected to agree with them and you've breeched some sort of silent social contract if you don't#it's seen as *immoral* almost it feels like#it's difficult to describe unless you've noticed it yourself#americans react to the mere suggestion of eating anything outside of the same 2 meats and handful of fillers the same way#that pearl-clutching aristocrat grandmas react to hearing that people in foreign countries do.. basically anything#it doesnt matter if you're suggesting eating ube cake or suggesting eating live bugs because people will react the same way#everything that's not chicken/beef/ect is as good as bugs to people here#hate this stupid blandass country and how impossible it is to afford any food other than burgers if you're not rich#or blessed with relatives that have any idea how to cook and are at all willing to teach you#cause nother weird thing i've noticed about food culture-or at least wasp food culture-that i haven't seen anywhere else quite the same way#is that if you DO have any relatives that know how to cook then nine times out of ten they will jealously guard their recipes like a dragon#and refuse to share them with anyone#thus taking whatever little cooking knowledge was in the family to their grave#so the opportunity other people usually have for family bonding via passing on recipes? pffft no.#for some reason we seem to actively go out of our way to prevent these things from being passed on#i don't know what the fuck is up with that but i suspect it has something to do with 50's dinner party oneupmanship
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