#but can we call it a start when i just wrote a bunch of question marks next to things and made a bunch of unsubstaniated claims

[6kate1bishop6]

okay me when i start crying have possibly a panic attack unsure and then write 300 words for my report in like 5 minutes

[keisminx]

shoujo mangaka!akaashi keiji who is the most composed man you’ve ever met until your teasing finally made him lose control <33

cw. timeskip. brat!reader. teasing. raw sex. hentai mangaka!reader. semi-public sex (?). creampie. dirty talk. called akaashi sensei 1 (once). MDNI. 18+ only.

a/n. thanks for the love to my first post !! i’ve been thinking about this too much hggfff... so here you goooo >3< also this might be an inaccurate setting >__< and another also i might have miss a tag LOL.

shoujo mangaka!akaashi who you shared a table with in a manga signing event because his and your manga are on top chart of the publishing company.

shoujo mangaka!akaashi who is surprised when that one erotic manga titled so obscene was written by a woman who looks like she stepped out of his manga.

shoujo mangaka!akaashi who overhears absurd questions from your male readers such as “do you moan like your characters?” and you just said “what do you think?”

shoujo mangaka!akaashi who was flustered when you complimented him and his work.

shoujo mangaka!akaashi who you suddenly started calling akaashi-sensei in the office when you see him in that sweet, innocent voice.

shoujo mangaka!akaashi who you keep teasing when everytime you see him. always in his space to mess with him, frustrate him.

shoujo mangaka!akaashi who asked “is teasing a personality of yours or a hobby?” and you answered, “nope, it's something i use to know if a man like you can handle someone like me”

shoujo mangaka!akaashi who is the inspiration of your new sky rocketing one shot hentai manga where the composed male lead fucked the brat out of the female lead.

shoujo mangaka!akaashi who you asked if he reads your manga already and followed with, “wanna recreate it with me?”

shoujo mangaka!akaashi who saw you at the pantry and got brave enough to ask you, “was that me in your latest one shot?”

shoujo mangaka!akaashi who overheard when someone complimented your one-shot, you answered with “thank you, i was so heavily inspired”

shoujo mangaka!akaashi who you overheard went to overtime at his office space since he’s finishing with manuscripts so you give him a visit.

“akaashi-sensei— we shouldn't—”

your skirt is bunched up at your waist, panties pushed to the side. his manuscripts and sketches under your palm as you are perched on his desk.

his cardigan is hung on the back of his swivel chair, belt unbuckled, pants hang on as he gives his hardened cock a few pumps before lining it at your wet, sloppy cunt.

you let out a whimper as he teased you, running the tip through your folds as his free hand keeps one of your thighs open.

“don’t worry,” he said, teasing your pussy a little, “the office is empty at this hour.”

akaashi surprised you by entering when your mind is somewhere else. you can feel it as your back arched— the stretch, the length, his hands gripping your hips. it’s overwhelming you.

“f-fuck, keiji.”

this is exactly how you imagine him but holy shit.

he quickly picked up the pace, teeth biting his lower lip as he ruts in you. his eyes are watching his cock enter in and out of your drenched pussy so easily like you just mold yourself for him.

“didn’t think i would find out about you writing filth about me, hm?” he breathes at your ear, “didn’t think i will fuck you like your bratty female lead, huh?”

you mewl, hands wrapping around his nape, under you are his papers that are probably crumpled now. the desk squeaked as he fucks into you.

“‘sorry.. ‘m sorry..” you whined, tears stinging your eyes.

“oh wow?” he let out some sort of low chuckle, one hand gripping your hair to make you look at him. “are you copying one of your dialogues?”

“‘m sorry,’” he whined, mockingly. “‘p-please, don’t stop..’— that’s what you wrote, right?”

you babble somewhere between ‘sorry’ and ‘please’. you are making a mess, legs trembling.

“crying already? god, you are just like your characters.” he groaned, fingers digging at your hips might as well leave a mark.

“p-please, keiji—nghh”

he stared at your fucked face— tear stained, mouth parted slightly as you let out moans from the pleasure.

“gonna cum already, sweetheart?” he asked, rhythm still the same, “gonna cum around your colleague who you got inspiration from? just like reliving your story, hm?”

your hips bucked, walls fluttering around his cock as he picks up the pace. you let out a wail as akaashi bottoms out, spilling inside your cunt, filling you up.

your head tipped back, eyes closed, body almost giving up on his desk if he wasn't holding you.

but when your eyes landed on him, akaashi was already looking at you.

“hope you remember all of that because i’ll be waiting for your next publish.”

[lucimaaie]

we ✧.* tlou

pairings - santa barbara!ellie x reader

summary - ellie promised herself she wouldn’t get attached to anyone after santa barbara, look how that turned out.

warning - angsty, not proofread cause i wrote this pretty quick, short (as always),

part 2

After Santa Barbara, Ellie had no plan for the future. She’d left Dina and JJ and let Abby go. She knew would still have nightmares and the pain wouldn’t leave her. What else was there to do?

Maybe that was the reason she fought you as you tried to take care of her. “Leave me alone!” She said as you’d tried to help her up from the water, raising her arm around your neck. Thinking about it now, the memory of her weak attempt to tussle you made her laugh.

You fought as hard as she did despite being starved and traumatized yourself. She didn’t know your story, just that you were the only one who didn’t want to kill her as soon as you came out of that crowded cell. You knew that she was immune and that was it. Nothing else was important in the moment. Nothing she wanted to tell you anyway.

You took care of her so much she started to feel guilty for not returning the favor. Cleaning her wounds, taking first watch, giving her whatever food you two had left. Ellie questioned whether it was pity or too good to be true, that you’d try something the moment she relaxed. But as she got stronger, nothing bad happened. You cared for her all the same.

So she cared for you. She watched your back and let you sleep a bit longer since she knew her mind wouldn’t let her sleep. She held you the way you held her when she awoke screaming. Gave you light kisses everywhere to distract you (and her) from a haunting past she knew nothing of. Conversations weren’t your speciality. You didn’t know a lot about each other, but you knew each other.

Eventually, you got lucky and found an abandoned cabin far away from Santa Barbara and quickly settled in. It wasn’t big and there was one bed, but it was shelter. Ellie didn’t want to call it home just yet.

“We should move south.” Ellie blurted, shaking the snow off her boots onto the porch. She could already hear your lecture about letting the cold in, but that wasn’t her focus. Did she just say we? “I mean, nevermind. Here’s fine.” It wasn’t. It was cold as hell and she was tired of the cold she’d been in her whole life.

“No, why south?” You said as you adjusted the small sticks that provided at least a little warmth in the small space. Ellie came to sit down next to you, leaving no space between you. She looked at you, admiring how the orange light shone on your face.

“It’s hotter.” She held your gaze as you listened intently. “Probably make hunting easier.” Ellie knocked her shoulder into yours without much force.

“You ever been south?”

She shrugged before shaking her head. “Nope.” She looked at the fire. That might be a downside of south. No more needing to snuggle up to you to not freeze to death. South you probably have to give each other some space to cool off. “Was just a thought.” She scratched her ear. “What’d you do while I was out?”

“Counted our supply. put on the fire. cleaned our clothes. a bunch of nothing.”

“What about eating?”

“uh-no. forgot that part.”

“Course you did.” She sighed, rising to her feet and look around for the bag you two stuff all cans in. All your belongings in the cabin were generally pre-packed in case you had to run, but still the fact that you’d been able to accumulate these things together made her feel something she couldn’t describe. Annoyance was part of it. that she got so attached to you after she promised herself she wouldn’t. that it just complicated things. But that already happened the moment you’d kissed and let things go further.

“here.” She used her knife to open the can of beans and sat back next to you, handing them over.

“you do know we sleep in the same bed, right?” You hesitantly took the can and swished them around with the spoon.

“trust me i know, but i don’t need you losing body fat and clinging to me like a koala.”

“you’ve never even seen a koala.” You said, taking a bite of the beans. not bad but not good and most importantly not expired. You set the can down in the middle of you, signaling that you wanted to share. She shook her head and sighed as you pushed the can closer to her, your eyes saying ‘please.’ She took a small bite just to appease you and shoved it over to you. “just shut up and eat.” she swiped her thumb over the edge of your lip. “and stop eating like that. we’ll get you more food tomorrow.”

Hours later, ellie shot up in the middle of the night, her heart feeling like it would burst out of her chest at any moment. She choked on her own breaths as she buried her head into her knees. “it’s not real, it’s not real, it’s not real—“ She mumbled the same words you did when you saw her like this.

“ellie?” You sat up as well, watching her with concerned eyes. She started to sob as she heard your voice, whether out of fear or relief you didn’t know but you didn’t give it much thought as you ran your fingers through her hair, letting her cry in your lap.

Eventually her tears stopped, leaving her with a pounding head and the comforting silence you provided. Her head rose from your lap and she pulled you into her, not willing to let go. Her head rested on your shoulder as her hands roamed under your shirt. There were no words for a while.

When there were words, they came quietly. “el?” you whispered. She didn’t respond for a while, still stuck in her swarming thoughts. “yeah?”

“where are you from?” It felt like a random question to ask, but there was no way you were gonna ask what she dreamed about.

She blinked for a few seconds, surprised. It was a simple question, yeah, but it could lead to other questions. she was scared to answer and ask back. “boston, i guess.”

“oh.”

“why’d you ask?” She let her head fall back on the pillow and tugged on your shoulder, silently asking you to turn around. And you did, facing her.

“i guess i just realized i never knew that stuff about you.” You said, fidgeting with her hands as you awaited her response. It felt like some dangerous territory, you weren’t supposed to cross. That was weird, you already crossed other, farther lines. “should i have not asked?” You whispered, tentatively.

“no, you..” She cleared her throat. “you can ask.” She finally looked at you, eyes soft with fear, pain. “i just..i don’t wanna talk about it all.”And go back there, she wanted to say.

“you don’t have to.” You scooted closer to her, laying your head on her shoulder.

Elie wrapped her arms around your back, her legs around yours, and looked at you. She let out a deep sigh as her heart beat for a different reason this time. “we don’t have to talk about it all. not right now.” we, there was a we. she wasn’t making it up. “okay,” She kissed your forehead.

thank you for reading!

[fight-for-what-you-love]

♪ Worldwide - Big Time Rush

I'm gonna be honest- these episodes kind of fell apart while I was making this. The more I re-wrote the story for it's second draft the less this version made sense and the less interested I was to work on it. I have not much else to say except sorry this part is kinda iffy and sorry it took so long. I promise you I'll make up for this in the next episode I PROMISE

Notes on both episodes under the cut!

Sweden Sour

* (I think it’d be really funny if Cody just doesn’t talk at all this episode. Not a word. Just nods and head shakes and depressed faces.)

* Cody’s incredibly depressed after Noah’s elimination. Sierra’s over the moon, though. She sees Cody depressed and gives him a tight side hug, petting his head. She tries consoling him with “I know you’re sad, but it’s ok! At least I’m still here~.” Cody starts sobbing, head in hands. Heather is sick of this already.

* The teams get their “ibuilda” pieces and the Amazons argue on what it’s supposed to be. Cody stares at the pieces for a few seconds before the light briefly re enters his eyes. He starts building. Courtney tells him to stop but Heather tells her he’s obviously got it, so let him work. They start helping him build… something.

* Once the Amazons are done, Heather, Sierra and Courtney take a step back to see what they’ve built. It’s a giant wooden Noah head. Their faces drop. Heather is filled with murderous rage.

* We built Noah’s face (We’re gonna take first place) Cause we built Noah’s faaaace

* Tyler’s jumper would be white.

* Cody doesn’t sing in this number. Chris notices and stares at him threateningly. He reluctantly hums the chorus and Chris takes what he can get.

* (Alejandro takes off his shirt to pull the boat like a freak. Duncan is unfazed and Tyler will deny it if you ask him if he blushed.)

* Sierra hits Noah’s Head hard enough it falls over on its side and suggests sawing off the side to ride in him like a boat. Heather and Courtney agree to this. Cody has no comment.

* Duncan and Alejandro don't bother bending over backwards to please Tyler. Duncan makes himself captain and no one argues.

* When the Amazons go to pick a captain, Courtney grabs the hat and declares herself captain without input. Heather tries to argue but Courtney argues back- Cody is in no condition, no one trusts Sierra and Heather took control the last challenge so this time she’s in charge. Heather reluctantly backs down.

* Amazons catch up to team Chris in the water. Alejandro sees them approach and makes note of Cody’s face, making fun of him for being so upset about “the Noah thing”. Cody furrows his eyebrows and points furiously at Chris’s boat. Courtney agrees that yes, they should shoot their boat.

* It doesn’t matter who wins the challenge since it’s a non elimination round, but I want to say the Amazons persevere. The massage helps Cody enough that he’s not stone faced next episode at least.

Aftermath III (Aftermath Aftermayhem)

* Gwen, Owen and Noah are introduced together. Gwen walks out first and Owen, hugging Noah to the point of lifting him off the ground, walks behind her.

* Geoff asks what all that’s about and Gwen responds that Owen refused to let him go until Noah “understood just how sorry he was”. Noah insists he forgives him, but Owen still won’t let him go.

* The Owen square is replaced by the Tyler square. The prompt is survive. (The hosts throw a bunch of debris at the contestant for thirty seconds and if they dodge everything they move on.)

* (For brevity’s sake, assume all of the contestants that participated in the board game in the original episode participated here [with the exception of Tyler, who is replaced with Owen]. They all get eliminated the same way as well, Noah getting got by aliens, Owen falling down the booby trap square and Beth making it to the final question.)

* When Beth gets stumped on the last question (What was Duncan's band called) Noah yells at her, frustrated: “Oh my- It’s Der Schnitzel Kickers, Beth!!” Confetti and balloons fall from the ceiling.

* (He knows this because Cody had mentioned it in a conversation after the London challenge.)

* Noah initially complains about winning the game, but Owen reminds him that he gets to see Cody again and he shuts up immediately.

* “Noah wins!” “Wasn’t he disquali-” “NOAH WINS!! Let’s wrap it up. We’re done here.”

[pixystixx]

You Should Date!

I APOLOGIZE TO WHOEVER REQUESTED!! Something got completely screwed up when i went to post!! I'm also sorry for now posting for forevs xx I'm back now and I wrote some more :)

Resquest: Hi! Could you write a colby brock x chubby reader fic where they have crushes on each other but don't know it? Maybe they're doing a video where they react to comments but a lot of them are about the two of them and how they should date because they're either always flirting with each other or Colby is super protective of her. 

colbybrock x f!reader

Summary: You've been friends with Colby for quite awhile. You guys are at one of his parties, but he wants you to stay after and film a video. When you guys film the video all of the questions are about you two flirting and Colby being different towards you. (843 words)

Warnings: some dude being kinda gross to the reader

༻❦༺

You’ve been at Colby’s party for a while, but it’s beginning to die down now. People you don’t know very well are starting to leave his apartment. You’re sitting on a couch next to Colby and a couple of his friends.

“Well, I’m gonna head out! See you guys later,” a brunette girl calls out, getting off the couch.

“See you,” Colby replies with a tiny wave. It’s only 5 p.m., but you feel like it’s your time to leave.

“Hey, Colby,” you say, leaning closer to Colby, “I’m thinking of heading out.” Colby’s eyes immediately dart to meet yours, and he looks at you with his eyes wide. He plants his teeth on his lower lip softly—a gesture you’ve learned over years of knowing him, meaning he wants to say something. “What? You have that look on your face,” you ask.

“Can you stay?” Colby asks quietly, making sure no one else can hear him. His question makes your heart flutter in your chest. You cannot handle being alone with Colby right now, so you open your mouth to say no. You’re quickly cut off by Colby saying, “Y/N, please. I wanna film a video.”

You sigh, knowing Colby will get whatever he wants out of you. Your only soft spot is one for Colby. “Fine, but this party better be out of here soon,” you answer. Colby smirks slightly and gets up from the couch.

You sit quietly, hoping not to be disturbed, but another guy you don’t know sits on your right. He smells of cigarettes and cedar and has an edgy appearance. “Hey, pretty,” he says, winking at you. His presence makes you uncomfortable, so you flash him a small smile. He suddenly puts his hand on your thigh and squeezes.

“Can you not,” you growl, moving his hand off your thigh. He goes to put back on your thigh with a scowl on his face.

“Get off of her!” Colby yells, dropping a drink on the floor. Colby grabs the guy by his collar and pushes him towards the door. “Get out! And never talk to her or me again!” he shouts, his fists bunched at his sides.

The whole apartment goes silent, and everyone stares at Colby and you. You clear your throat and whisper, “Can you tell them to go home?” Colby’s angry expression quickly softens, and he nods.

“Sorry for the disturbance, guys. Party’s over,” Colby announces, pointing to the door. Everyone shuffles out, which leaves you two alone.

~

After calming down, you and Colby started filming a video answering the fan’s questions about you two. “Hey guys! I’m here with Y/N, and we’re answering some of y’all’s questions!” Colby says into the camera, “Okay, first one! What are your favorite movies?”

“Ooh! Mine’s definitely Scream. It’s just such a classic!” you exclaim, smiling widely. While you talk, Colby looks at you with the cutest face, a slight smirk, and soft eyes. You feel your cheeks go red and try to cover it by shyly running your tongue along your teeth.

“What was that one we watched last week?” Colby asks. He looks at you patiently while you think. “Wait, I remember! The Shining.” You nod, and Colby looks back at his phone. “Next one,” he mumbles, “Why are two always flirting?”

Your face turns red, and you nervously burst into laughter. “What? We do not!” you laugh. Colby chuckles a few times and fixes his hair.

“Yeah, totally,” Colby says quietly. You guys sit there in silence for a few beats. Colby inhales awkwardly and clears his throat. Suddenly, there’s an abnormal amount of tension between you two.

“Let me pick a question,” you mutter, taking his phone. His skin brushes against you softly, sending warm signals through your body. You pick a random question. “This one says.., this isn’t a question, but you should date,” you breathe out.

Colby laughs awkwardly and says, “All of you guys keep saying that!” He looks at you when he says the next part of his sentence, “Maybe we just need to test it sometime.” You giggle uncomfortably, and he frantically adds, “Just joking!”

You guys laugh, and you sigh before reading another question, “What happened at the party? Colby almost punched that dude. He’s so protective of Y/N.”

You have chosen to forget about the party, so the question annoys you. Despite your annoyance, you answer, “Some asshole laid hands on me.”

“Yeah, and I almost punched him. If anyone tries something with Y/N, they have it coming,” Colby explains. He leans over to hug you, but his chair tips over, and he falls onto the floor. The loud noise breaks the tension, and you burst out laughing, practically in tears.

“Oh my god, Colby, you dumbass!” you yell while laughing.

You guys finish the video, answering a bunch of other questions. You leave Colby’s house with a smile plastered to your face. Your crush on him is really getting worse day by day. You really wanna know if he likes you back. (Spoiler: he does.)

[sakuraszn]

ⵌ ECHOES OF WHAT COULD BE !

ft. Izuku midoriya x fem. reader

synopsis. Izuku quietly harbors feelings for someone he knows he can never have. He watches from the sidelines, silently suffering as his heart breaks piece by piece, helplessly observing his friend fall for someone else.

cw. sfw content upcoming!! ┊angst ┊unrequited love┊unspoken feelings┊this takes place during highschool.

nia’s notes. I haven’t wrote in forever..I highkey missed it soo I’m back n ready to come out with a bunch of content for u guys! I got inspiration from a song called: girl by the internet. 0.9k words.

Izuku Midoriya had always been the type to wear his heart on his sleeve. He was gentle, his spirit was kind, and his dreams vast. But, despite those wonderful qualities that he has there was one thing he couldn’t bring himself to do: confess his love to the person he loved the most.

when it came to his feelings for you, he kept them locked away, buried deep within the confines of his heart. The dreams of becoming a great hero and harvesting the power of one for all were already a monumental task, and adding the complexities of love to his already chaotic life seemed like an insuperable challenge. So, he chose to keep his feelings at bay when the time was right.

you must be wondering how his feelings started for you, yeah? well, it all started during the second year at UA high school.

By then, you and Izuku had become among the closest of friends, like two sides of a coin, always together. Anywhere he went, you were right by his side, and vice versa.

Izuku has always admired your inspiration to help others even when it’s not needed.

Your presence had a way of lighting up a room, and your devoted attitude knew no bounds. All those things about you just had him in a chokehold and lured him to you like a cartoon character flying in the air for pie. He often grappled with the question: why couldn’t he muster the courage to confess his true feelings for you? It was a struggle he faced daily, a quiet battle that kept him awake at night. Each time he thought about disclosing his heart, fear crept in, wrapping around him like an unshakeable cloud.

Instead, he chose to remain in the background, silently observing as you drew closer to Shoto Todoroki, the charming boy who seemed to effortlessly grab the attention of everyone in the class.

Izuku couldn't help but feel a twinge of envy stirred within him lately every time he saw you and shoto together. You two were always laughing, sharing inside jokes, and supporting each other in ways that made Izuku's heartache. he could see the way your beautiful eyes sparkled when you looked at shoto, the way you would easily get flushed whenever he was near. It was clear to everyone, including Izuku, that you, y/n, had fallen for shoto.

Weeks dragged on, and the interactions between Izuku and you widened painfully. He still crossed your path often, still fought beside you in battles that demanded trust and unity, but the ease of your conversations had vanished. Laughter that once echoed between you now felt forced, awkward—a fragile reminder of what used to be.

One evening, the sky bled crimson as the sun dipped below the horizon. You stumbled upon him outside the dormitories, alone and consumed by his relentless training. His kicks sliced through the air with a desperation that mirrored the turmoil in your heart. It was as if the rhythmic motions were a futile attempt to keep the ghosts of your shared moments at bay. You stood in the shadows, unsure whether to approach or linger in the silence that had grown so thick between you.

“Deku,” you said softly. “Can we talk?”

He glanced up, jolted by your sudden approach, the gravity in your voice catching him off guard.

“Of course.”

You stood there hesitantly with your hands fidgeting nervously with the hem of your skirt. “I’ve been meaning to tell you something. It’s about Todoroki.”

Izuku’s heart sank quickly. He nodded, bracing himself for the knowing words that were about to come out of your mouth.

“I… I think I like him,” she admitted, your cheeks tinged with warmness. “I’m not sure how he feels, but I wanted to tell you because… well, you’re my closest friend, and I value your opinion.” The words hung heavy in the air, and Izuku felt like someone plunged him with a knife and twist it in his stomach.

Izuku forced a smile, but inside, a storm raged. “That’s great, y/n. Todoroki’s a great guy.” Each word felt like a dagger, carving into his chest as he fought to maintain his composure.

“You think so?” she asked, her eyes searching his face for the reassurance she desperately wanted, unaware of the uneasiness brewing beneath his calm surface.

“Yeah.” The word slipped out, almost a whisper, his voice trembling just enough to betray the shambles within. “I think you’d make a great couple.”

The weight of her smile hit him like a shipment train, a bittersweet wave of comfort washing over her while he stood there, drowning in his own heartache. “Thanks, Deku. That means a lot.” Her gratitude pierced through him, leaving an aching void where hope once flickered, a crushing reminder of what could never be.

As you walked away, exchanging bittersweet goodbyes, Izuku let out a shaky breath, his hand pressing against his chest, overwhelmed by an aching nothingness. The words he desperately wanted to say felt heavy and trapped in his throat, swallowed by a paralyzing fear that gnawed at his heart. A deep sense of regret washed over him as he watched her figure recede into the distance, every step pulling her further away from him. He couldn't shake the painful thought that if he had only conjured the courage to confess his feelings sooner, maybe, just maybe, things could have been different.

He also understood that some things were better left unsaid. As he gazed up at the now dark sky, the weight of unspoken words hung heavy in the air, a bittersweet reminder of the moments lost to silence.

©sakuraszn! xoxo

[brodygold]

The Lecture

Bruce slid into his usual seat in the front row of the lecture hall, noting his best friend, Sawyer, already there. Sawyer was hunched over his desk, rearranging his meticulously organized notes. His wide-rimmed glasses slid down his nose as he adjusted his pocket protector, crammed full of pens in every color imaginable. The faint glow of his acne-covered cheeks highlighted his enthusiasm.

Bruce set his worn-out bag on the floor and pulled out his trusty notebook, a favorite blue pen, and his lucky number 2 pencil. He also placed two highlighters—yellow and green—on the desk for easy access. He and Sawyer exchanged quick grins, ready for another one of Dr. Hanson's legendary physics lectures.

"I heard we're talking about quantum particles today!" Sawyer whispered excitedly, the grin on his face wide enough to show his braces.

"Poggers, Sawyer! I've been waiting for this since the semester started," Bruce replied, his voice buzzing with equal enthusiasm.

While Bruce didn't sport Sawyer's stereotypical nerdy look, he had his own geeky charm—a mop of unkempt blonde hair that fell past his shoulders, a pair of noise-canceling headphones permanently dangling around his neck, and a gamer’s gut, nurtured by too many late-night snack breaks. They were an inseparable pair, their shared passion for science and gaming solidifying their bond.

As the rest of the lecture hall filled, a hush fell over the room when the door banged open. A young man, probably in his late 20s, strolled confidently to the podium. His athletic build was hard to miss under a tight gold jersey, the fabric hugging his broad chest and biceps.

"Hey there bros. You all can call me Mr. Gold. Or Brody if you're feeling more casual."

Sawyer shot his hand up. "Mr. Gold, where is Mr. Hanson? He didn't say anything about missing class today."

"Great question, bro. I actually ran into him on his way to class and we had a nice chat. We both decided it might be good for me to give a guest lecture today while he runs some errands." Mr. Gold took the opportunity to write the title of the lecture on the board:

The Physics of Football

"Ew. Sports." Bruce thought.So much for quantum particles. He didn't even like playing video games about sports, and now they were forced to learn about the "math and science" behind it all? He wondered if he should just get up and leave, but he was sitting in the front and everyone would see him. Might as well just sit and listen to what Mr. Gold had to say.

"Now it might sound strange to you nerds, but there's actually a lot of math involved in sports. The players may be too dumb to do the calculations in their head, but they're there. Let's go over an example."

Mr. Gold turned around and started drawing on the board. It was easy to see it was one football player throwing the ball to another.

"Let's say that during the play, the QB wants to throw the ball to the wide receiver. Thanks to forces like gravity, the ball will eventually land. The tricky part is getting the ball to land in the receiver's hands. Let's say he throws the ball and the two are 70 yards apart. What shape is the path of the ball?"

Pfft. That was an easy question. Bruce went to put his hand up and give the answer, when his mind suddenly went blank. He knew they'd just covered this exact topic in his calc class, but nothing came to mind besides "curve." He tugged at the collar of his button down, feeling uncomfortable in it all of a sudden.

"Anyone? Guess we have a bunch of dumb jocks in this class." Mr. Gold let out a chuckle. "The answer is 'parabola.' The ball travels in a parabola from the quarterback to the receiver. Now let's just say the equation representing the parabola is as follows." He turned back around and wrote a relatively simple equation on the board.

"Now obviously the dumb jock isn't going to know what the equation is when he throws the ball. He just goes off of instinct and practice. But there's so much we can figure out from knowing the exact equation. For example, we can figure out when the ball hits the ground. Any idea how we might do that?"

Bruce scoffed. Another easy question. You just sent the equation equal to zero and... and... damn it! This was supposed to be so simple to a nerd like him! His mind felt like it was slowing down. Though the football example was making more sense now. He was getting a bit invested in it and could see Sawyer was too, the other nerd having taken off his glasses to better pay attention.

"You bros really are dumb jocks, huhu." This time some of the guys in the class laughed along, their voices seeming deeper than Bruce remembered. Maybe he shouldn't have stayed up all night binging that new space documentary series. "Let's work through it together nice and slow. We set the equation equal to zero like so. Then we just need to solve for x. Simple algebra at this point. Why don't we try it ourselves and see what we get?"

Bruce tried to solve the equation in his notebook, but he found it harder to hold the pencil. His hands almost seemed meatier than they should be. His grey t-shirt felt great though. Nice and tight, just how he liked it! But seriously, who would ever need to know this stuff? Like Mr. Gold said, it's all instinct and practice anyway!

"Alright bros. Did any of my dumb jocks get the answer? You should have gotten 6 seconds. By the blank looks on your faces, it seems you all may be a bit too dumb for this. I was going to ask if any of you remembered how derivatives worked, but why don't we all go throw the ball around outside instead?"

Bruce let out a yell of approval with all the other jocks in the class. He turned to look at his best bro Sawyer and gave the hot jock a fist bump,. Who cared about any of this nerd crap anyway? He looked at the golden jersey he was wearing with pride. The Golden Army was his home, through and through. He was just in school to get a sports management degree and work full time for the best team ever made!

Mr. Gold smiled at the cheers. "Excellent. Class dismissed."

[ladykailitha]

Love is Kind

All of the stories I was reading today were sad Steve and it made me cry so I wrote happy Steve to make me feel better.

@mira-jadeamethyst @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @emly03

***

Jeana looked down at the purple water lilies in Steve's hand in distaste.

"Water lilies?" she asked, frowning. "Not red roses?"

Steve looked at her in confusion. "Yeah, your favorite flower in your favorite color."

"Yeah," she agreed, reluctantly taking the flowers. "But red roses are more romantic for Valentine's Day."

Steve went from wilting in disappointment to her reaction, to standing up straight with a spine of steel. "Oh I get it now." He took bouquet back from her forcefully. "Yeah, we're done."

Jeana's eyes went wide. "You're breaking up with me on Valentine's Day over a bunch of flowers?"

"No, Jeana," he said coldly. "We're done because you didn't tell me you wanted red roses. I assumed that the cheaper more personal water lilies would be the perfect thing for Valentine's Day."

Jeana winced.

"Ohhh..." Steve said, "I get it now. You wanted the Harrington money." He rubbed his fingers together. "Despite the fact that I work at a book store. That I told you when we first started going out that I had been kicked out."

Jeana rolled her eyes. "You still wore nice clothes and had fancy hair products in your bathroom, like I was supposed to believe that obvious lie?"

"I save for those!" Steve hissed. "I can't use anything else for my hair, I've tried. And yeah, so sue me for buying something nice once in a while."

She peeked around him to see the table was set with romantic candles and another bouquet of water lilies. "You weren't even going to take me out to eat?"

Steve tossed the flowers on the counter behind him. "Why else would I have you come here instead of picking you up?"

Jeana threw her arms in the air. "I thought you were supposed to be this Romeo, this Casanova."

Steve's nostrils flared. "Out!"

She stomped her foot and crossed her arms. "I'm not going anywhere until we talk this through!"

"There is nothing to talk about," Steve said, spinning her around and pushing her toward the door. "You were expecting me to shell out a shit ton of money on you, money you thought I was hiding from you. It's clear you were never interested in me, only the money and prestige the Harrington name brought you."

He opened the door and shoved her through it. "Goodbye."

He slammed the door behind her and gripped his hair tightly. Not enough to pull but just enough to feel pain at pressure of his tugging.

Now he had dinner that was about to be ready in ten minutes, no girlfriend, and a dessert he had slaved over all day.

He needed to call someone to share this with. Robin was doing Valentine's with Vickie so she was out.

Then his eyes lit up. He knew exactly who to call.

He walked over to the phone and dialed.

"Hello, Munson's Funeral Parlor, you tag 'em, we bag 'em," the warm baritone came through the line.

"Eddie!" Steve said with a giggle.

"Stevie!" Eddie greeted back. "To what to I owe this pleasure?"

"How goes your anti-consumerism night in?" Steve asked, avoiding Eddie's question.

"Eh..." Eddie said. "Could be better. I'm watching violent movies to make myself feel less lonely."

Steve chewed on his bottom lip. "I have a warm lasagna, fresh breadsticks, and a nice bottle of wine and suddenly sans a girlfriend if you wanted to have some company."

"What happened with Jeana?" Eddie asked.

Steve sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "She didn't want me, she wanted the Harrington money, the King Steve charm, and a Casanova, not Steve Harrington who works at a queer little book shop in the middle of town."

"Well, fuck her," Eddie said. "Her loss. You bet I'll be there, sweetheart. Just give me time to put on my shoes and I'll be there as soon as I can."

"Thanks, Eds."

*

Steve opened the door a few minutes later to find that Eddie somehow had found sunflowers in the middle of fucking winter.

“Where are on earth did you find these, Eds?” Steve asked, breathing in the scent of his favorite flower.

Eddie tapped his nose knowingly. He spotted the water lilies in the vase on the table and dumped them in the trash. He replaced them with Steve’s sunflowers.

“There, that livens up the place better,” he said, turning to Steve, “don’cha think?”

Steve smiled back at him. “Yeah it really does.”

He went and made up their plates as Eddie opened the wine. He set them down on the table while Eddie filled their glasses. Steve trotted back to the kitchen and pulled out the breadsticks that were warming in the oven. He put them in a nice basket a covered them with a towel. He set them on the table between Eddie and him.

“This looks fantastic, Stevie,” Eddie murmured and dug into the lasagna. “Ooh. This is better than fantastic. This is divine.”

Steve hurried to take a sip of his wine to hide the flush of pleasure at the compliment that dusted his cheeks. And judging from the smirk on Eddie’s face, he hadn’t been successful at all.

“So what were you watching before I interrupted you?” he asked, blush still staining his cheeks.

“Chinatown.”

Steve grimaces. “That is pretty violent. A little depressing too.”

Eddie shrugged, stabbing another bite of lasagna. “Was kind of the point. Didn’t want anything happy or romantic today.”

Steve picked up his glass and held up to Eddie. “I’ll drink to that.”

Eddie laughed, but clinked their glasses together and drank when Steve did.

They polished off all of the breadsticks, all of the wine, and about half of the lasagna. Steve put the leftovers in the fridge.

“You want a soda or something?” he called from the door of the fridge.

“I’ll take a beer if you have one,” Eddie called back from the sofa.

Steve grabbed two beers and handed one of the cans to Eddie.

“I thought you preferred bottles, babe,” Eddie said, popping open the can.

“I do,” Steve muttered darkly. “They were Jeana’s.”

Eddie cackled. “Here’s to stealing your ex’s shitty beer!”

Steve laughed too. “Cheers!”

Eddie went over to Steve’s record player and put on some Metallica he’d left over here and then flopped back on the sofa next to Steve.

“Thanks for coming over,” Steve murmured over the screaming riffs of Master of Puppets. “Rob is over at Vickie’s tonight and didn’t want to ruin her Valentine’s day, too.”

Eddie smiled softly. “And since I refuse to participate in the rampant consumerism of the day, there would be nothing for you to ruin.”

Steve chuckled. “That and you’re my best friend. I couldn’t think of anyone else I’d want to spend it with.”

This time it was Eddie’s turn to blush and he shoved a lock of hair in front of his face to hide the redness of his cheeks. He pushed playfully at Steve’s shoulder. “Fuck off. I’m sure there are lots of people you could have called that would have come running.”

“Rob was first pick,” Steve said, “you were second. I mean it, Eds. I wanted to share everything I’d done for her with you instead.”

Eddie’s blush reached his ears and stained the column of his throat. “You keep that shit up and this boy is going to start thinking impure thoughts.”

Steve blinked for a moment before he laughed. It wasn’t a harsh or hurtful laugh. It was bright and cheerful. “You put out on the first date, Eds?”

Eddie who was starting to think he’d taken it a step too far, stared up at Steve in amazement. He got his wits back fast enough to quip, “Only if they’re pretty enough.”

Steve ducked his head and scratched the back of his neck trying to hide his embarrassment. Well maybe that was the wrong word. Charmed. He was fucking charmed.

“You think I’m pretty?” he asked, voice barely above a whisper.

Eddie raised Steve’s chin with his finger. “The prettiest boy I’ve ever seen, Stevie.”

Steve gulped. “And if I told you that I’ve had the biggest crush on you for so long?”

“Then I would ask why we aren’t dating, sweetheart,” Eddie murmured, leaning in close.

Steve let out a shuddering sigh. “Because I didn’t think I was an option for you.”

Eddie half knelt on the sofa, cupping his face in his hands. “You are my number one option, honey. Just say the word and I’m yours.”

“Mine.”

Eddie grinned and then kissed Steve gently on the lips. He pulled back after a moment. “This isn’t just because you’re lonely on Valentine’s Day, right?”

Steve pulled Eddie onto his lap and brushed their noses together. “No, baby. She was only ever a placeholder for you. And a piss poor one at that. She never loved me for me. Not like you.”

Eddie chuckled. “And what makes you think I love you, pretty boy?”

“Because you knew I would be sad and brought me sunflowers.”

Eddie kissed Steve fiercely. “You are too clever for your own good, honey. Yes, that is exactly why I brought them. Because I didn’t want you to be sad. Because I wanted you to feel loved.”

“And I do,” Steve murmured. “I love you, too. So so much.”

“Good.”

They resumed kissing. It was darker. Deeper. More potent. Eddie could write songs and poems and books filled with the love he felt for this man and finding out that he felt the same.

All the bookstores and libraries in all the world couldn’t begin to fill the amount of pages Eddie would need to even try and convey how he felt in that moment.

But it could be summed up in one word.

Ecstasy.

Just pure ecstasy.

*

Robin wasn’t sure if it could be called a walk of shame when she had told Steve that she would be spending the night at Vickie’s, but walking into their shared apartment after the wild sex they had had last night she did feel a little silly.

She stopped short when she saw who was in her kitchen making breakfast in Steve’s track pants.

“Eddie?” she squeaked.

Eddie looked up at her with a grin. “Welcome home, Bucksters! If you haven’t eaten yet, pull up a chair and grab a stack of pancakes. I’ve made plenty.”

“You’re not Jeana,” Robin said stupidly.

“Nope.”

“Steve would never cheat,” she said, again trying to figure this out.

“Nope.”

“You two are a couple now?” Robin asked, her brain still in first gear.

“Yup!”

Just then a very sleep rumpled Steve came wandering out of his bedroom and latched on to Eddie. “I missed you.” He kissed Eddie’s neck.

Eddie kissed his temple. “Sorry, sweetness. I got hungry.”

“Mhmm..” he muttered. “Does smell good.”

“Morning, dingus.” Robin crossed her arms in front of her chest. “You want to tell what this is about?”

Steve looked over at her and gave her a dopey smile. “Jeana sucked. Only wanted the Harrington money and not me. Called Eddie over to make me less sad. He brought me sunflowers and made me very happy.”

Robin looked over at Eddie who half shrugged around a clingy Steve. “That’s the gist of it.”

“Got it,” she said. “I’m happy for you both.”

She grabbed a plate and pilled on the pancakes, with Steve releasing Eddie to do the same.

As the three of them sat down and ate Eddie’s pancakes, Steve smiled happily to himself.

He was with the two people he loved most in all the world and he wouldn’t change a thing.

***

Permanent List: @spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @gregre369 @artiststarme ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @chaoticlovingdreamer @maya-custodios-dionach @danili666 @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @i-must-potato @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog @justforthedead89 @vecnuthy @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @dragonmama76 @scheodingers-muppet @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt @useless-nb-bisexual

[hypernova-writes]

I've been reading your fics, and I love them! I heard you wanted some long fic ideas, so a medic x reader proposal fic? I literally eat up fluff fics of these folk, even though there's a bunch everywhere.

Also, I'm really happy you can get the appreciation you deserve on tumblr! You definitely know how to write❤️.

A/n: AHHH THIS IS SO CUTTTEEEE!!!! Also thank you!! I used to write fanfic 2 years ago, but never really posted, just wrote them in my notebook like it was a little book.!

Proposal: Medic x Nurse!s/o.

“Ach! Where is it? She’s going to be back soon, where is it!

Medic was STRESSED.

First they were called for a battle last minute, ruining Medic’s plans that he had.

Then the Mercs kept calling him for stupid little insignificant injuries that could have waited!

Now here he was, looking, scrambling for the little velvet box he had bought.

“Ah! There it is!”

Medic reached his hand and pulled out the pretty pink velvet box. This was a pretty little thing that was made for another pretty little thing, his little Liebling, soon to be his kleine Frau.

You, Y/n. His pretty, nursing assistant turned girlfriend of 2 years now. Medic usually wouldn’t do dating, but the way you had him wrapped around your fingers. He was so in love, that even some of his fellow mercs noticed a slight change whenever you were around him.

He had overheard you chatting with Ms. Pauling, you chatted about marriage, and even settling down…with him of all people!

He remembered blushing at this conversation. Medic himself had never really dreamt of being a family man. But when he saw how you gushed about having kids and wanting to give your children a better life than you had.

Suddenly medic was ready to be a father and giddily planning your wedding behind your back.

“Now..All I have to do is ask her.”

“All you have to do is ask me what, babe?”

Medic jumped as he quickly hid the box behind his back, being started by you.

“Oh, mein Liebling! Do not do that, you scared me!”

You giggle as you sat your bag down, you had finished up your work early and came to see Medic. “Sorry~ But no serious, whatcha got there~”

Medic got flustered as you pulled him forward by his tie, you knew what you were doing to him. He could feel his cheeks warming up and he went to look away.

“A-ah..Well that is a surprise! You would have to release my tie and you will see what it is!”

You sigh and give him a peck on his nose before releasing his tie. He fixes his tie before sighing softly.

“Close your eyes for me.”

“You’re not gonna knock me out so you can surgically switch our hearts back, i got used to yours in here.”

Medic chuckles. “No, No. Don’t open them until I say so.”

You giggle and keep your eyes closed, you can hear Medic moving around, as well as him mumbling under his breath for a bit before you hear him clear his throat.

“Open them for me.”

You open your eyes and the sight before you is enough for your heart- well medics heart, to melt.

“O-oh..Ludwig..” You cover your mouth as you had to fight the tears that were going to build.

Infront of you, Medic, Your Ludwig, was on one knee, a box in his hand, opened, presenting a beautiful ring to you. You could see that his face was flushed, a small smile on his face.

“Will you do me the honor, Of becoming my wife?”

You nodded happily, and tackling him to the ground when he placed the ring on your finger. You placed so many kisses on is face, that had Medic giggling as he held you close to him.

“Oh you’ve just made me the happiest Doctor in the world~!, Not only are you my assistant, you are now mein wife!” He says as he hugs you, the two of you sit up, leaning against his cabinet.

“Mhm..and that means we should celebrate~’ You purr, by pulling at his tie. Medic blushes before smirking at you. “Oh really?..~”

Engineer was a walking with Pyro, they both had a question to ask Medic.

Pyro was walking ahead of Engineer and spotted archimedes had been placed outside of the Medbay.

Heading over to the bird, they were confused at why it was outside, and was about to open the door, but stopped, deciding to place their face to the door to listen in instead.

“O-oh fuck..~! Medic..Medic..~”

“Yes, Yes. Moan for your husband Darling.”

Pyro pulled away from the door and stood infront of Engineer.

Engineer tilts his head. “What the matta, Pyro? Is Medic not in there?”

Pyro shakes his head quickly “No” and Engineer then gives a small smile, “Well then that’s alright, Let’s go join the others, I’m sure the doc will be in soon.”

Pyro nods when he follows Engineer back to the common area.

Hope you enjoy!!!

[scribblesofagoonerr]

hi guys!

so it's come to my attention that this whole few series might be a little confusing to read in a particular order so I'm just gonna try and narrow the explanation down a little bit...

so in order to probably understand monkey's personality first i would read a few bits from chaos fc which starts of as an aussie pest and an english pest who are best friends and love to cause chaos together!

these 5 fics are based around their time in melbourne and what they get up too

↪ i'm never babysittin' again! | mission: chaos fc | yer' a pair of pests! | wheres' dumb and dumber? | come get yer' kid!

from there there's a few fic's that follow on from this with monkey's different adventures in scotland and nashville, where's up to no good as usual

↪ wee' bit of haggis in scotland | yeehaw' it's cowgirl era | you can kiss my ass, cowboy!

following on from these if you want to read more about monkey's past then i suggest reading a lot of reserved feelings which kinda goes into the small details about monkey's reserved side when she first moved in with leah and jordan

there is also a bunch of head canons and blurbs that are related to this as well which will help to understand monkey's past better in monkey's background and i think it is also briefly mentioned in monkey moves in

after this i would recommend reading the separate mini series in which this introduces buddy and it gives a bit of an insight into what she is like and how she handles the separation between her two mums but this is wrote around the same time as monkey returns from her adventures in nashville

there's several more head canons/blurbs that are related to buddy through the time before she was born in ivf and pregnancy and and and even the introduction between monkey meeting buddy for the first time

if you wanted to read about the gender reveal of buddy then i would recommend the flashback fic to finding out the gender of buddy in oh baby! which is in the buddy & monkey series where monkey is so excited about it

the whole buddy and monkey: double the trouble series is pretty self explanatory and it's mostly about the two of them and the adventures they get up too, together

however, there's a few i would recommend reading together which would be the bubbles are pink, jackass! and then the farmyard adventures since that follows on from the swear jar fiasco

from there there's a couple of fics that are not really planned to go in any particular order which are buddy's first words as well as no more money for monkey and we brought a puppy home

there's also a good couple of head canons and blurbs related to this series the break up | euro final | buddy cheering monkey up | zoo adventures | training days | kimmy the babysitter

also the social media aspect of it which is reunited again and monkey's lioness debut

following along with the head canons and blurbs there's several in chaos fc which can be read in any particular order as well leah being drunk | making a fool of herself | monkey encouraging leah to drink more | monkey winding leah up the morning | captain kimmy & monkey blurb | england call up | media duties with monkey & kyra and continental cup celebrations

the four most current ones at the minute are the glastonbury mini series following onto both parts of whoa, we're going to ibiza I and whoa, we're going to ibiza II then from that its' my most current work which is the the haunting nightmares of the past

i hope this somewhat helps and it's not incredibly confusing to read now - there's more to come for all this so i will update this as and when i can!

and as always if you have any questions about anything then please feel free to continue to ask me anything whether it's anonymous or not, i love answering questions about this chaotic pair! 💗

[cleopatraphouse]

Top nine Wormfics (as picked by someone who has read over a thousand Wormfics)

(I know Wormblr can be kinda tight-knit so please don't feel bad if you're not on the list.)

9. Wink

(x)

By: Idiom Alpha

Status: Dead. 29K words.

Summary: Post- Gold Morning, a small-time band of villains struggle to survive in post-apocalyptic America.

Gold Morning and its consequences are fairly underrepresented in Wormfic. Even the fics set on Gimel tend to feature it as more of a new settler town than a ‘rebuilding after the end’ Eaden. Part of the reason is the relative newness of Ward, part of the reason is the relative badness of Ward; but let’s be honest, a lot of the reason is that post-Gold Morning there’s no Taylor. And no one reads Wormfics without Taylor.

Wink doesn’t have Taylor, except vaguely in the background of a flashback scene. And it’s really really good anyway.

After a slow bit at the start of chapter one, we get to see into a fully realized scavenger civilization Earth Bet. Some towns exist, held together by capes or regular human grit and spit. But most of the world’s population has died or relocated. But it’s not really a sad story, as dark as the subject matter gets at times. The narration (given by OC cape Bystander, whose deal I’ll leave as a surprise) is purposefully light and jovial. Example sentence: “You know, I think the funniest part about the apocalypse is that it left everyone with a lot of free time.”. This has the dual purpose of giving the exposition pizzazz and personality, while making the emotional moments that come later hit harder.

Speaking of. So, like, I have autism (and a couple of other things but that’s the important one here). I don’t know exactly how severe it is on a scale of one to ten, but it does make my life difficult. I’m not sure how much detail is appropriate to give here (yknow, because of the autism), so I’ll keep things vague. Suffice to say that many things are difficult for me that I really really wish weren’t.

I bring this up because the most seen I’ve ever felt, as an autistic person, was reading Finale in Ward. (Even though she gets called not-autistic in the same chapter...)

The second most seen I’ve ever felt is reading Sentiment’s interlude in Wink.

I’m not going to give the whole thing away, but the line where her brother tells her to be normal, and the narration follows up with “Kinneret tried being normal. It wasn't a very fun game, but she played it for years. It didn't help her make any friends.” Yeah. Yeah, that’s real shit. Way realer than that one Questionable Content strip which still bugs me years later even though it’s not important or relevant at all.

The fic unfortunately died shortly after the plot started actually picking up. Thankfully the chapters are fairly substantial. An arc for Bystander is successfully conveyed, even if it’s not the fully realized arc that was clearly being built to. There are even twists! And there’s some pretty good art, drawn by the author.

Idiom Alpha has written a bunch of Wormfics! Sadly literally all of them are dead. They’re still really good though! My favorites are Not Looking Forward To It (which has my favorite takes on Dinah and Flor), Lean (which has my favorite take on Noelle), and Don’t Do Brains! (which has the only ending Idiom ever wrote even though it’s officially unfinished).

8. Santa-Assault And Imp The Elf: Christmas Carnage

(x)

By: Rukaio Alter

Status: Complete. 79K words.

Summary: Assault just wants to teach Imp the meaning of Christmas in his own roguish way. When he’s kidnapped by The Elite, she gets dragged along and triggers, which might be what they need if they’re going to escape.

There are perhaps a surprising amount of Christmas-themed Wormfics (Visited By Three Villains and The House Of Mortal Clay spring to mind as choice picks). This is the best one though, partially because it’s more Home Alone than Prep And Landing. While Christmas is inherent to the plot, set dressing, and even themeing; the fic is not trapped by being ‘a Christmas fic’. While there is a “saving Christmas” bend to the plot and imagery, it’s more just a very very well written story about two strangers trying their best to save some kids with cancer from supervillains... during Christmas, while dressed as Santa and an elf. It’s a fun ride at any time of year. I read it slowly to savor it.

This is easily my favorite take on Assault. I mean, the portrayal of Imp is really good too, but this is the version of Assault that the other fic!Assaults wish they were. Roguish and irreverent without being uncaring, goodnatured and upbeat without being saccharine, and burdened by his past without being maudlin; Christmas Carnage is able to fully explore and flesh out a character relatively underutilized by canon. And yes, there’s more to his relationship with Battery than sitcom tropes. We even get to see him as an angsty kid!

People completely allergic to cheese probably won’t be able to tolerate the sillier moments, the jokes can get goofy. (Sample joke: “You said it made me look professional!” / “And you were stupid to believe me.”) It’s a fairly deft management of tone though, it never slips into outright farce even when the comedic explosions start up. And Ruk gives most of the serious parts (even a tearjerker or two) room to breathe.

Some of the fight scenes maybe lack some of the impact they should have (Ruk has a bad habit of starting action paragraphs with discourse filler words). That’s just kinda something you gotta accept, treat it like part of the shonen-esque action-comedy the fic is clearly modeled after.

I really wanna stress that this could have easily just been a silly crackfic, the title even wants you to think that. But instead there’s really tight plotting, moments building naturally from character interaction, lots of setups and brick jokes, and subtle background worldbuilding. A few of the payoffs are admittedly easy to see coming, but they’re still fun. And I’m not gonna spoil it, but the ending did give me that warm holiday-with-friends feeling.

Ruk is probably most known for his Unimaginatively Titled Worm Snippet Collection, which has some of the most creative and good short stories in the fandom. I’m specifically shouting out “Screenbug” and all his takes on Contessa. He’s also done an enjoyable-if-a-bit-underseasoned crossover with Columbo, Just One More Thing, Mr. Anders...; and the weirdly problematic crossover, Brian Laborn: Ace Attorney. Outside the fandom, he ran an original fiction and review blog for a few years, and has done stuff in a couple other fandoms I’m not in.

7. The Postdiluvian Road

(x)

By: Aleph (Immatrael) & EarthScorpion

Status: Complete, with a sequel hopefully on the way eventually. 115K words.

Premise: In a timeline where Leviathan wipes Brockton Bay off the map, Lisa and Taylor go on the run together as the only surviving Undersiders.

This is technically a shipfic, but don’t let that color your preconceptions too much. This is a story about Lisa and Taylor getting to the point where they might wanna date, but that’s not the main events occurring. They don’t even kiss. Taylor thinks a lot about Lisa’s lips, and Lisa confesses to a sleeping Taylor that she’ll always be there for her. It’s a very slow burn, is what I’m saying.  But it’s not plotless, it’s not a coffeeshop AU (as much as I enjoy Coffee Machines And Golden Mornings); the whole story is character development skillfully interlaced with conflict scenes.

In the hands of less artistic writers, the Leviathan attack would be an easy excuse to get two characters alone. That’s not what happens here. TPR completely commits to the premise. Just as every canon chapter set in post-Leviathan Brockton is soaked in filthy water and supply chain problems, every moment of TPR is suffocated in paranoia and desperation. This is, as a result, the fic on this list that keeps most closely to Worm’s apocalyptic tone. Lisa is never sure that Coil’s really dead, that she’s really free. Taylor never stops grieving her dad. Brief moments of respite feel less like breaks than they do pauses. Every bit of emotional development comes after struggling to find food and a place to sleep.

One of my favorite aspects comes when Lisa and Taylor are trying to get some quick cash. They steal some suitcases, one of which contains some mysterious vials. They throw the vials out because they only want the money and the vials are worthless to them. Obviously, the reader knows they’re Cauldron vials, but the story never feels the need to point it out. And it wasn’t just a thrown in detail, it sets a group of capes after them. Lisa and Taylor are stumbling through other stories that we only get snippets of. The world is real and big and scary, but maybe these two can find safety in each other’s arms.

This fic also features the most subtle and tasteful Simpsons reference I think I’ve ever read. Keep an eye out!

I’ve seen people say that TPR!Skitter is weaker than she should be, but I think that can be chalked up to her having less grounding, less familiarity with the environment, and less backup. All she’s got is whatever bugs are around her and a squishy thinker to protect, she doesn’t even have a base to build up stores. There are understandable reasons for Taylor to be the underdog, is what I’m saying.

The fic is wrong about Niagara Falls, though. Niagara Falls is goddamn beautiful.

I am given to understand that this is only part one, and that a part two is or was meant to come out some day. Even if that doesn’t happen, we still have is a complete story of two girls who gradually realize they might wanna be gay in between doing crimes, and I think that’s great.

Aleph and EarthScorpion previously collaborated on Impurity, a Taylor alt-power Wards fic that to be honest I didn’t get much out of. EarthScorpion also wrote a crossover with a video game I’ve never played, and Aleph contributed some interlude chapters to something called Silence Is NOT Consent!.

6. Silence Is NOT Consent!

(x)

By: JustAnotherCat (justanothercatgirl) and Aleph (Immatrael)

Status: On hiatus. 310K words.

Premise: After the Slaughterhouse Nine leave Brockton Bay, Skitter finds Amy having wretch’d Victoria, forces her to undo the physical damage, and takes Victoria in.

This is a hard one to talk about. There’s so much discourse attached to Amy’s character already that mentioning her becomes a minefield. Add on SINC’s brutally honest depictions of the aftereffects of rape on the victim, and I’m just painfully, painfully aware that if I don’t write this right everyone will (justifiably) get mad at me. 

So, what I’m going to say is that I think this is a horrifically accurate portrayal of severe PTSD. If you are lucky enough to be neurotypical, I imagine parts might seem unrealistic or unintentionally comedic. No. That’s what it’s like. Or, yknow, as far as I’m capable of understanding. Basically every chapter has some kind of gut punch, where Victoria again realizes how she’s still being affected by her trauma. It is uncomfortable and horrible and real.

But even besides all the heavy stuff, this has a great portrayal of Taylor and Victoria. The story’s written first person, from Victoria’s perspective, and it’s so great to see her act as a kind of straight man to Skitter’s usual deranged determination. This is the most in-character Taylor I’ve ever seen in a Wormfic, how she’s constantly going to eleven for the greater good, even when and ESPECIALLY when it’s unwarranted. One of my favorite moments comes shortly after the Rachel interlude: an uncontrolled emotion power goes off without warning during a negotiation; Taylor pretends she did it on purpose; and Victoria watches, bewildered. It’s funny, dramatic, and characterful all at once.

I will say I respectfully disagree with some of the decisions regarding Alec and Aisha, although I understand why those decisions were made and get how they fit thematically. In general the side characters are noticeably weaker than the main duo (although I think this is my favorite ever take on Charlotte). See the Brian interlude for what I mean. It’s a worthy portrait, sure, I agree with the author’s note that Brian doesn’t get enough love in fic. But does it go as deep into his character as it could?

The worldbuilding, however, is a highlight, fleshing out Brockton just that little bit. I particularly enjoy the details about the entrance to Skitter’s lair. It never feels expositiony either, every line of description comes off as an in-character observation from someone desperately trying to keep her shit together. And as the story progresses, so too does Victoria’s familiarity with her new situation, leading to my favorite Taylor/Victoria pairup. Like The Postdiluvian Road, this is not a romance story so much as it is a survival story that happens to include learning to trust again. It is bleak, sad, beautiful, and even occasionally funny and cute.

Silence Is NOT Consent! is currently on indefinite hiatus, sadly. But even if it never comes back, it’s well, WELL worth reading, even if you haven’t cried to "Body Terror Song" by AJJ.

justanothercatgirl also has a one-shot collection (which has my favorite depiction of Shatterbird) and shockingly little else. I hope she’s writing other things in her spare time, because I’m not kidding when I say the world needs voices like hers.

5. Intercession

(x)

By VigoGrimborne

Status: Complete. 189K words.

Premise: Post-Gold Morning, Taylor is Isekai’d by Contessa into the Harry Potter universe, and given an infant Harry Potter to raise.

I'm a little reluctant to mention this one; apparently the author is uncomfortable with the amount of attention it got. Also it’s a Harry Potter crossover, and fuck J.K. Rowling. But like, the story is really good. REALLY good! Don’t get mad at me, I’m a transgirl, I know how bad Harry Potter is!

I had no idea how badly I needed to see Taylor Hebert being a good mom, or, for that matter, to see Harry Potter vehemently defending an adoptive parent. The fic isn’t perfect, there are certain comedic moments that just fall flat for me (the most forced ‘Taylor's boobs’ joke outside of canon). But that doesn’t matter. This is close to the platonic ideal of the ‘Taylor gets isekai’d post-Gold Morning’ fic. And it has really good pacing thanks to it being planned out in advance, almost every chapter feels like a nearly-complete story on its own. Other writers, take notes.

Other writers should also take note of how Taylor doesn’t waltz into the situation and immediately beat everyone else. There’s actual tension and stakes as she struggles to deal with magic for the first time, to shake off the rust and get back into combat. Even when she wins, it still has that skin-of-her-teeth desperation to it that Worm did so well.

Tellingly, a lot of the worse parts you’ll want to skip on a reread are the parts most rooted in Harry Potter canon. Harry’s first perspective chapter detailing his first three years at Hogwarts is great, but the parts spent at Ron’s house are pretty inconsequential. Maybe it was meant for the people who didn’t come from the Worm side of the fandom crossover? Harry’s classmates, at least, are given actual personalities and arcs totally absent from the books.

Credit must be given to the romantic pairing. VG somehow, miraculously, managed to make Taylor Hebert x Sirius Black not only a not-creepy pairing, but a straight-up great match. This isn’t teenage Taylor shacking up with an adult; this is Taylor as an adult mother, fully prepared to kill Sirius if his roguish charm starts negatively impacting her son.

VigoGrimbone also has a collection of side stories, outtakes, and rewrites called Of Summoning Snakes And Sorting Hats, definitely a must-read if you like Intercession even a little bit; and a collection of Worm one-shots called Chunks Of Worm, which features my favorite Amy/Lisa pairup in one story.

4. Mixed Feelings

(x)

By Kittius

Status: Dead. 1M words.

Premise: In a slight AU, before canon start, an OC named Astrid (not to be confused with Aster) triggers after years of abuse from her Nazi father.

I found this one thanks to ColossalMistake plugging it in an interview they did, and I'm honestly flabbergasted that I hadn't heard about it before. It's straight up brilliant. Is it the one million plus wordcount that's making people rec it so infrequently? Is it the unashamed British slang that keeps making it into the dialogue of ostensibly-American characters? All I know is that Mixed Feelings is astonishingly good.

It would be irresponsible of me to not address the length. This story is a million words long even before we add in the 50K of sidestory and the other 50K of author-written apocrypha. And no, it did not need to be that long. A million words into Worm and we had at least fifteen arcs and all that entails. A million words into Mixed Feelings and we’ve had five arcs, a few fights, and one major character breakthrough.

Some of the wordcount is justified. Astrid is constantly repeating certain phrases in her head (“There is always a basement.”, “Failure is always punished.”) and this is great! It really gives you the claustrophobic feeling of being controlled which she’s dealt with her whole life. It’s like SINC, only it’s CPTSD instead of PTSD. Some of the wordcount is... less justified. The Emma interlude goes on for three parts, the Battery interlude goes on for five, and both could have made their points in two. And just skip the Testing, Testing sidestory. Even back in the main story, I do not care about Kid Win’s relationship fumbles.

It’s worth pushing through though. For one thing, the worldbuilding is fucking incredible. Astrid was raised by her Nazi father to be a child soldier, and this is reflected in how she sees the world. So we as readers get to see how the Wards HQ works, from the workout room to the cafeteria to the Youth Guard advocates. But we don’t just see them, we see them through her viewpoint. Sometimes this adds a tinge of comedy, like with her continued bewilderment that other people are engaging in decadent behaviors like eating candy or making jokes. Other times it adds little dramatic flairs, like when she’s incapable of understanding that “punishment” does not mean “extreme physical abuse”. The world feels real and lived in, with PRT foot soldiers irritatedly gossiping about Assault’s criminal past, Carlos sadly reminiscing over his dead boyfriend, and the Youth Guard desperately and futilely trying to stop more superpowered children from dying.

The overall mood is dark, which partially comes from Astrid’s fucked worldview and her slow healing process, but it also comes from looking straight on at what the Empire Eighty-Eight would actually be like. Worm justifiably gets flack for having a depiction of Nazism that’s only slightly more real than Raiders Of The Lost Ark. Mixed Feelings has a depiction of Nazism that’s clearly had research put into it. Pay attention to how an OC villain is clearly based on ‘women are property’ incel screeds, without it ever being actually spelled out. And as horrific and disturbing as the depictions of Nazism are, they’re probably as respectful towards the real-world victims as possible. And the best part is that the fic repeatedly, repeatedly shows that growing up as a Nazi (even unwillingly) is actively killing Astrid. She is almost totally incapable of functioning in the real world, because every interaction is filtered through trying not to be hurt. Her actual body is failing on her, because of her father’s lifelong abuse. You just wanna give her a hug. Except you don’t, cause she’d flinch at the sudden movement. I can relate!

Mixed Feelings has my favorite take on Piggot and Carlos, as well as Rennick, for what that’s worth. But the real star of the show is Amy. She’s such a bitch, to EVERYONE, it’s great! If you’re a big Ward fan I imagine you won’t love her as much as I do, but for anyone who’s able to imagine Amy Dallon happy, here she is, miserable and annoyed and taking it out on whoever is nearby at the time.

The author’s notes are super neat too, going into why they made certain decisions based off of offhand dialogue from across the whole of Worm.

All that said, it is funny how there’s NO EFFORT AT ALL put into making the story seem American. I learned like fifty British slang terms from my readthrough. Not that it affects the quality of the story, but it is funny to imagine American teenagers in 2011 casually saying things like “all and sundry”.

Kittius also has a snippet thread, which includes some non-Worm stories that are pretty nifty, although the overall quality is, to be honest, variable.

3. The Great Escape

(x)

By ColossalMistake

Status: Dead. 106K words.

Premise: Eidolon must deal with the loss of his reputation due to the revelations during the Echidna fight, while at the same time attempting to help with a total breakout from the Birdcage.

Apparently this was made partially as a self-challenge by the author. ‘Is it possible to make Eidolon interesting?’. And If that story is true, this is one of the biggest slam dunks in writing challenge history. Absolute knocking it out of the park. This goes beyond “my favorite take on Eidolon” to “I now want to read more Eidolon fics”.

Eidolon here is a tragic superman. He’s tormented not just by his diminishing powers, but also by his pact actions in Cauldron and his impotence in the face of larger societal structures. The Great Escape has a lot to say about the actual nature of power. Early on, Eidolon briefly tries finding escapees manually before giving up and having Doormaker send him where he needs to go. This is after he’s kicked out of his homebase in Houston. He can go anywhere he wants, but that’s not his office anymore. Later, he tries to help put down another situation, only for it to be revealed that everything he did was part of Contessa’s plan. He can fight Endbringers, but he's still human, he's still part of the system. This all has even greater thematic resonance when he goes to church and talks to a priest as himself, as David. He’s a Christian, struggling to be what God meant him to be, struggling in a world that seems beyond God. Even I was touched, and I’m an annoying atheist edgelord.

As you’ve probably gathered by the other descriptions in this post, I’m a sucker for fanfic that expands the world of the original work. Imagine my joy when on top of the previously-mentioned setpieces, we get mention of a website besides PHO. Eidolon meets a young, naive OC named Amp, who is specifically trying to use him for a photo op to boost her rep, since she read online that it was a good move. Words cannot describe how much I love this scene. Eidolon’s gradual realization of what exactly Amp is trying to do... damn it’s good. And then Amp gets one of the top-two Wormfic interludes, where we see her entire life story, and we understand her, warts and all. Beautiful.

All due respect to the very good Initiation, Covalence, and The Problem With Other Realities, but THIS is the deadfic I most hope comes back. Everything from the prose to the characterization to the worldbuilding is spot on. (The plot is maybe a LITTLE loose…) And look out for the most admirably restrained Taylor usage in any Wormfic, she appears in the background for half a chapter, and it’s perfect, no notes.

Besides a couple of short, cracky one-shots and a contribution to the fanzine; ColossalMistake also wrote The Underside Of Gotham, a very very good Batman crossover that is brilliantly plotted and arranged. Every member of the Undersiders and every member of The Bat Family gets exactly one POV chapter. It’s downright impressive how every perspective feels like the perfect viewpoint for that chapter, and every chapter fluidly builds towards the story’s ending. He also wrote Internal Calculus, a CYOA crackfic where YOU are an intern at Cauldron trying to seduce Number Man. There are a whole lot of endings and some very funny lines, and also one ‘frustrated writer’ rant that you kinda have to just raise an eyebrow at and move on.

2. Intrepid

(x)

By Cerulean

Status: Ostensibly only on hiatus, but don’t hold your breath. 860K words.

Premise: In an AU with many major and minor changes from canon, The Locker Incident leaves Taylor with a power that makes her seem catatonic, leading Emma and Madison to trigger. Emma joins The Undersiders, Madison joins an AU New Wave, and Taylor joins Faultline’s Crew. Meanwhile, Sophia attempts to deal with how the other Wards hate her even more now by helping out a new trigger in her spare time.

Anyone lower on the list is fully justified in getting mad at me. Intrepid has a lot of problems. The prose can be clunky, some moments (especially redemption arcs and romance scenes) feel unearned or rushed, many plot elements are introduced and then underutilized, and fight scenes often end too quickly. Some of the examples of ‘an adult guy trying to write a teenage lesbian’ are, er, unfortunate. And uh. There are way more slurs than were necessary to show that Nazis are bad. That’s before we even get to how the story handles the concept of ex-Nazis, which can politely be described as “naive”.  

This is the most Marvel-y of the fics on this list, with a lot of focus on exciting battle scenes with lots of people, even when the fighting seems kinda contextless. Madison especially enjoys throwing out quips a la Spider-Man in a way that can be jarring given the surrounding violence.

But no matter how much I thought about it, I couldn’t make myself move Intrepid down a slot. Those moments may be unearned but damn if they don’t hit. Interlude 20B is an incredible example of how to do a ‘minions rebel against their boss’ thing. Chapter 6-07 might be my favorite car chase I’ve ever read (admittedly not a lot of contestants in that contest, but still). There’s another chapter which is almost a blueprint for how to perfectly kill off a certain kind of villain. The “You like girls, Captain Oblivious.” monologue is just a fantastic bit that I needed to mention. And Intrepid also has one of the only Endbringer arcs I’ve EVER enjoyed, INCLUDING in canon.

This is also my favorite take on Sophia. She, through a somewhat elaborate set of circumstances, becomes the leader of an independent hero group during her off hours from the Wards. And while this causes her to become a less shitty person, she never loses her anger issues, she never stops being Sophia. I hesitate to call it a redemption arc, it’s more just character development. A lot of ink has been (justifiably) spilled over her canon appearance, which barely rises above racial caricature, and I’m not going to pretend that Intrepid has a radical deconstruction of her which makes it okay somehow. But yknow, if you’re stuck with it, this is maybe the best you can do.

Intrepid also has my favorite take on Labyrinth, which I will fully admit is pure bias on my part. I just really like it when neurodivergence is portrayed as endearing and not annoying, okay?

In the end, this is a fic that’s on this list not because it’s necessarily better written or better plotted, but just because of how much fun it all is. This is a fic where every cool idea the author could think of got shoved in there. Sometimes that leads somewhere, sometimes it doesn’t, but it sure always feels like it’s going to, which is skilled writing in and of itself. The Travelers show up, and just for fun, Noelle is their leader and they’re all alt-powers because they drank different vials. It’s great! New Wave shows up, but they haven’t unmasked and Fleur isn’t dead and Amy and Vicky both have alt-powers. Wonderful! That girl who Taylor mentions to Emma once in canon shows up and becomes the Butcher but the Butcher has a new name because they got subsumed by a new group. Fuck yeah! This fic is an example of how many changes you can make to canon while keeping it recognizably Worm. Why don’t we have more of that in the fandom? I mean, I can think of some examples (Slick, The Fall, even Inheritance) but so many people are content to follow the goddamn stations of the canon. 

This is also the only Wormfic I think I’ve ever read that does Armsmaster’s transformation into Defiant in a unique way. I love when fanfics are able to recreate arcs or plot moments in new contexts!

The most recent arc (written after a five year hiatus) admittedly makes me doubt that Cerulean still has what it takes to give Intrepid the conclusion it really deserves. But the fic is still too damn fun for me not to love. In short, this is Wormfic’s answer to Kingsmen: The Secret Service, another awesome fun action romp that doesn’t totally make sense plot-wise if you think about it for too long (and kinda sucks right at the end).

Cerulean started in the Animorphs fandom with the pretty decent Animorphs: Redux series. His first Wormfic, Atonement, is retrospectively a sort of dry run for Intrepid, exploring the same themes and ideas but not as good. And it has my favorite take on Legend! I do, however, need to specifically disclaim the original character of Vacate, who has some of the worst attempts at ‘realistic Urban dialogue’ I’ve ever read, it’s kinda uncomfortable. Currently Cerulean is publishing two original web serials, neither of which I can recommend in good faith. Heretical Edge is impossible to describe because the plot changes every other chapter, and Summus Proelium is just Worm but worse. Read the first chapter of each and then skip everything but the interludes, treat them like short story collections.

Bonus Round: Other Wormfics which have a particular special sauce

Absolution by Quantumsheepery, which has the best dialogue in any Wormfic, and the only good use of ‘aura theory’.

Broken Crown by thevalleyarchive, which has my favorite takes on Theo and Krieg, and also some of the most horrifically realistic depictions of Nazism I’ve seen in fiction. If it was far along enough to know that it’d stay this high quality, it’d be in the top ten list, easy.

Chain by Truebeasts, which has my favorite Dragon and Aisha.

Collagen by T0PH4T, which has my favorite Hookwolf, my favorite Endbringer arc, and an almost unforgivably clunky start before getting incredible out of nowhere.

Episodes by Sharpes_Tanith, which has enough plot to fill an entire arc used as background flavor for a one-shot of an uncomfortably honest portrait of bipolar disorder.

Glassmaker by JinglyJangles, which has this totally unique tone and vibe.

Here Comes The New Boss (Nothing Like The Old Boss) by HowlingGuardian, which has my favorite Spitfire, Velocity, piece of fanart, and Amy/Taylor pairup.

Just The Two Of Us by Discreet, which has a great plot I won’t spoil.

Mandible by Dragobeisha, which has my favorite Teeth and one of my favorite capefights.

Powers And Profits by Partizanka, which has one of the most out-of-the-box story concepts I’ve ever seen, executed flawlessly.

Slaughterhouse 9 Power Taylor by Thinker6, which has my favorite two-shot.

The Girl That Lived Through Time by 3ndless, which has a demonstration of exactly how much you can do with the Worm setting.

The Third Door by Dysole & TelegraphNine, which has my favorite Bonesaw’d!Taylor, and is a potential candidate for the awkward ‘most improved’ award.

These Bloodied Hands by beef jerky, which has some of the best prose in any Wormfic.

Unbreakable by JackSlash, which has my favorite Jack Slash.

1. Riley, Alone

(x)

By R3N41SS4NC3

Status: Complete. 94K words.

Premise: No spoilers just read it. Even if you hate Worm go read it right now. Seriously, there’s one moment that made my jaw drop with how good and clever and creative it was, it was like getting hit by a truck. Read it!

That’s right, my pick for all-time best Wormfic is one where Taylor doesn’t show up at all and The Undersiders get mentioned like once.

This is a story that has a very special place in my heart. As you can probably gather from the other fics on this list, themes of atonement and redemption just resonate with me more than themes of recovery. I find the question “Is it possible to still be a good person after hurting people very badly?” more interesting than “Is it possible to heal after being hurt very badly?”. (Is this because I am a bad person? Possibly!) And without giving anything away, there’s a sentence roughly in the middle of the fic that monocasually destroyed part of my Catholic guilt complex.

But besides that, the story is just extremely good. The prose is top-notch, the plot progresses at a steady clip without sacrificing detail or forgetting character moments, and the standard cliches of Wormfic are either avoided or given unique twists. My favorite example for that last one is a trigger event scene. Everyone who’s read enough Wormfic has seen the phrases “DESTINATION. AGREEMENT.” just so. so so so many times when a writer’s being lazy. Or, if they’re not lazy but they’re still kinda uncreative, it’s just the visions from Worm rewritten again. Giant whales and all that. Riley, Alone has a completely original, totally unique interpretation of a trigger event vision and it makes the scene so much fresher and newer while also contributing to our understanding of the characters.

Even the chapter titles are great! Riley, Alone is divided into three sections, plus an interlude and an ending. Each section has its own unique chapter title gimmick and it just adds this tiny bit of flourish that makes the story feel that much more cohesive and planned out. I can only think of one other Wormfic (the very good, previously-mentioned Just The Two Of Us) that’s taken the time to do something more interesting than Wildbow-style arc titles.

Speaking of chapters, credit needs to be given to R3N41SS4NC3 for creating a totally new take on the concept of a Worm-style interlude. Again, I don’t wanna give it away, but if you’re like me and you still think it’s kinda annoying how Worm switched between first- and third- person, you will maybe love this.

And yes, I am avoiding detailing what plot points the story has, but that’s because I really really feel like it’s best gone into as blind and unsuspecting as possible. It starts focusing on Bonesaw before the Nine get to Brockton Bay and that’s all you need to know.

I guess if I had to say something to criticize it, the plot slowing down in the second half makes the story feel a little lopsided towards the front. I kinda wish there was just a little more Bonesaw body horror stuff shown on-screen. There’s a scene with the Siberian where it’s debatable how well it holds up to scrutiny. Chapter fifteen specifically feels like it was crying out to be absolutely nightmarish but it isn’t really. Uh. That’s it. That’s all I’ve got. I love this story so much. It’s got my second favorite take on Jack Slash and my favorite-ever take on Bonesaw. It’s got meditations on identity (gender and personal and societal). It’s got a nicely subtle Pact reference.

Okay, there is one thing that annoys me. Early on, Jack Slash is suggesting names for Bonesaw’s latest creation, and starts to say “Murder Rat” before getting cut off in the middle of “Rat”. So he’d say “Murder Ra-“, right? But it’s written in-dialogue as “Murder R” even though that’d be read out loud as “Murder Arr”. Anyway go read it already.

R3N41SS4NC3’s other fics include Charity Begins At Home, which has my favorite Madison; Desperate Times Call For Desperate Pleasures (co-written with piperfurby), which has my favorite Manpower but does veer between brilliant and bewildering; and Pyrrhic Love, which has my favorite Emma. There’s also another story that I don’t wanna mention in case people get mad at me but it’s very artfully done. And when you've read all that, read its first fic, what if catgirl!taylor got stuck in a tree?, which is near-Wattpad-level crack, and see how all great artists have to start somewhere.

[thatfandomslut]

All Of The Girls You’ve Loved Before

Gretchen Wieners x Reader

Word Count: 1k

Trigger Warning: just a bunch of fluff

Request:

Hello, there! I don't know if this request will reach you or not, but I would like to request some Gretchen Wieners x reader fluff please, thank you! Inspired by All Of The Girls You've Loved Before by Taylor Swift

Mean Girls requests are open.

"Who wrote that?" Gretchen wondered, flipping through (Y/n)'s yearbook. The pink ink glistened on the page with red hearts floating around the name, (Y/n)'s name. The yearbook in Gretchen's hand was dated back to their freshman year, but the pink, flowing cursive made her feel ill with the recognizable feeling of jealousy.

(Y/n) rolled over from her back, and looked over at the book curiously. A hum escaped her lips as she recognized the handwriting. "This was back in freshman year when I was dating Emily." (Y/n) said casually. It was one of those fourteen-year-old relationships where you think you will be together forever. Of course, in the long run, it wasn't healthy, and it ended in text and approximately two days in bed before they both had developed crushes on someone new.

Gretchen didn't experience this kind of relationship. She had situationships like Jason's. She couldn't think back to when she didn't have feelings for (Y/n). Even though she's liked (Y/n) since middle school, it was their sophomore year that those feelings started to blossom fully. Then during the summer between their sophomore and junior years, (Y/n) and Gretchen became official. Gretchen almost forgot about all of the relationships (Y/n) had before them.

(Y/n) noticed the thoughtful pout on Gretchen's lips and gently took the book from her hands and closed it. "Gretchen," she called for the girl's attention, smiling a bit when Gretchen's coffee-colored eyes met hers. "You know, if we had gotten together earlier, this relationship wouldn't be as healthy as it is. I had to mature before I got to where I am now. I grew from those relationships in order to be the person I am today with you." (Y/n) said softly, cupping the girl's cup before placing a soft kiss on Gretchen's pout. Thankfully, this seemed to satisfy Gretchen as she kissed back.

Gretchen had realized that (Y/n) was right. They had been friends during all of the relationships (Y/n) dabbled in before they became official. She has witnessed this growth and maturity. Gretchen also grew during that time. Thankful for her words of reassurance, Gretchen pulled away, pressing a soft kiss to (Y/n)'s nose. "I grew during that time, too. I was in a toxic situationship with Jason, and he treated me horribly. You are the first and only person who has ever treated me like a person who deserved a good and healthy love." Gretchen confessed with a soft smile.

"I'm glad I can provide that for you, baby. You genuinely deserve the world, and I want to give that to you." (Y/n) moved to sit up, stretching slightly, her muscles tight from the position she was in on the bed. "Do you want to watch a movie and cuddle?"

Gretchen grinned wider at this. (Y/n) knew her well. Gretchen practically launched herself into (Y/n)'s arms causing the two to laugh as (Y/n) held her close. "Can we watch Clueless again?" She questioned, hoping (Y/n) would agree to this. After all, they watched it once every week. Unfortunately for (Y/n), it was a movie that Gretchen never grew tired of. (Y/n) nodded softly, kissing her girlfriend's temple before flipping on the movie for her. The room's previous tensions were now completely settled as the two enjoyed the movie.

(Y/n) could always appreciate how she and Gretchen communicated their feelings. She knew that Gretchen struggled with the idea of her and her past relationships. And, that was something (Y/n) understood. She heard an earful from Regina about how Gretchen had been crushing on her for years and she needed to 'woman up' and ask her out. (Y/n) was nervous to go out with Gretchen. She had only been in unhealthy relationships before her, but this has been the most amazing relationship she has ever been in. She was determined to spend forever with the honey-blonde girl in her arms.

Gretchen looked up at (Y/n) as she noticed the girl lost in thought. Her focus was obviously not on the movie. "What's on your mind?" Gretchen questioned softly, her hand gently moving to take (Y/n)'s. She always liked to know what was on (Y/n)'s mind. She lived for her girlfriend's thoughts and ideas.

(Y/n) bit her lips with a smile as her cheeks heated up. "Would it be too cheesy if I said you? I was thinking about how lucky I am to be with you. I'm just thankful for you, and in a way, Regina for pushing me to finally ask you out." She confessed before leaning her head back to rest on the pillows behind her. She didn't mean to get caught so zoned out, but Gretchen was someone who was incredibly observant.

Gretchen smiled at (Y/n)'s answer, squeezing her hand. "It is a bit cheesy, yes, but… It's also very cute, and it's nice to hear that you feel that way about me and for me." Gretchen responded, meeting eyes with (Y/n). The action would always take her breath away. "I feel the same way towards you. Also, I'm thankful for Regina, too. I love you." She said happily, leaning up to pepper (Y/n)'s face with kisses, causing the girl to laugh happily at the action.

"I love you, too, Gretchen," she said as her heart felt warm, the fluttering feeling in her stomach returning. It always came when she and Gretchen were acting like this. Both had forgotten about the movie playing in the background once Gretchen's lips landed onto (Y/n)'s. Both of their heartbeats accelerated but they were still in sync. The feeling of love and happiness filled the room as the two kept each other close, as they always did. At that moment, they felt lucky and a sheer amount of love that could end a war. It was evident to the both of them how much they wanted and needed each other, and how important it was to grow from all of the relationships they've had in the past.

[onboardsorasora]

This is an extra special chapter that I wrote for @chaosinstigator :)))) Happy Birthday Joey <3

Part 1 | Part 20 | Part 21

The day started out like any other.

Little Daniel woke Max up by climbing into his bed and snuggling under the sheets– wiggling to get comfortable. Then he whispered his thoughts to keep himself company until Max woke up. Sometimes Max woke up to hearing stories of the dreams Little Daniel had and other times he would hear Little Daniel’s thoughts on what they should do that day. 

Max found it cute as hell.

This morning, Little Daniel had been whispering about racing and watching the cats race each other. Max didn’t question it. He’d taken his small charge to the kitchen and set him up with his preferred breakfast of pancakes and cut fruit. 

While Little Daniel ate and watched tv, Max did his morning workout. 

The day was just like every other; he had a few calls to make, a meeting to take and some streaming time scheduled. Except

“Maxshy it’s Jimmy and Sassy’s birthday!” 

Little Daniel looked up at him expectantly while Max drank his premade shake, raising a brow. 

“What did you say Daniel?” Max was sure he heard wrong.

“It's Jimmy and Sassy’s birthday! We have to celebrate!” Little Daniel insisted, delaying eating a syrupy pancake to gift Max with an imploring stare.

“Are you joking around? How do you know?” Max felt the words slip out, he was sure he’d remember his cats’ birthdays, or rather the anniversary of the day he got them.

“No Maxy I not lying! My pants aren’t on fire! See!” Little Daniel pointed to his shorts before grinning widely up at Max, the scrunch in his nose let Max know that he knew he was being cheeky.

Max tickled his side in response, Little Daniel’s giggles perfumed the air.

“Since you’re a smartypants, how do you know it's their birthday?” Max fluffed Little Daniel’s curls, encouraging him to eat his breakfast.

“It's on the cal..calmender.” Little Daniel pointed to the RedBull Advertising calendar that featured a different RedBull sponsored sport for each month that Daniel had been gag-gifting him yearly at this point. Max didn’t even know where he got them from. 

When Daniel had originally given it to him, it was alongside a joke that he can have other sports in his flat and not just F1. Max had shrugged and used it to circle all his important dates– his mom’s birthday, Victoria’s, Luka’s, etc. Daniel had cheekily circled his own and Max had rolled his eyes at him.

Now, whenever he got a new calendar, all of his important dates are pre-highlighted by Daniel, including Jimmy and Sassy’s ‘Gotcha Day’. 

Max looked over to where the calendar had pride of place beside the fridge– where he’d been teaching Little Daniel to read it just last week. He’d stood him on one of the dining tables and they went through the months of the year and days of the week together. Max had read that it was best to do things with Exchanged people that you would regularly do with people at their exchanged age– so Max had gotten a bunch of fun educational books and toys. Just in case.

And there on today’s date was a poorly drawn cat face with Daniel’s curling handwriting. He looked back at his Little charge to see an achingly familiar shit eating ‘I’m right’ grin. Max conceded.

“Well what do you want to do today for them?” Max asked, already mentally shifting around his meetings– Christian would have to understand.

“We have to bake dem a cake! And get a toy!” Little Daniel listed off on his sticky fingers, “and ballwoons. We should have a paahhty.”

“Ok, we can call the bakery and order one–”

“Nooooo!” Little Daniel looked the most upset Max had ever seen him since the first day he Exchanged. “Mummy wummy always baked da cake. It’s so we know she loves us!” He insisted, “Jimmy and Sassy need to know we lub dem!”

Max nodded with a mental sigh, already knowing not to argue with Daniel’s logic in any form.

He couldn’t remember the last time he baked, well anything. He hoped there was a quick and easy option to all of this. He didn’t want to disappoint Little Daniel with his baking ineptitude. He figured a call to Grace was in order and maybe to his mom as well. He would need all the help he could get.

↫🎂↬

One call to Grace where she spent half of it giggling at his plight and cooing at Little Daniel later.

One similar call to Sophie who tagged in Vic and they both spent most of the call making faces with Little Daniel rather than being of actual help to him.

And one quick trip to the grocery store because delivery would have taken too long, later.

Max watched as Little Daniel excitedly carried his tote bag of ingredients into the kitchen, the sprinkles and frosting he eagerly chose would be perfect to hide all the imperfections to come in the cake.

Jimmy wound his body around Little Daniel as he walked, curiously sniffing all the new scents. Sassy watched from her perch on the back of the couch. 

“Exhcuze mee Jimmy!” Little Daniel lifted his bag away from the curious nose, his grin was wide. He was positively wiggling with his excitement at being able to help make the cake. 

Max accepted his little bag and lifted Little Daniel to stand on the chair he’d pulled up to the countertop. They washed their hands and Max tickled Little Daniel’s side while he wiped his fingers dry.

“Remember to stay on the chair ok Daniel, you pinky promised.” Max reminded and smiled when Little Daniel nodded solemnly.

Max arranged their ingredients, measuring out the amounts of oil, water and other things. 

“What does glu..ten free mean?” Little Daniel asked, reading the label on their cake mix box.

“It’s so little badger tummies don’t hurt.” Max said with a smile, Little Daniel beamed up at him.

“I’m a little badger! My tummies won’t hurt!” He rubbed his tummy for emphasis and laughed.

All in all, making the cake didn’t go as terribly as Max had anticipated. Sure there was a thing with the mixer and the flour going everywhere, but it made Little Daniel cackle with glee so Max figured it wasn’t so bad.

He got the cupcakes in the oven– because Grace told him that cupcakes were easier to decorate than a whole cake. And it was easier to tell when Little Daniel was sneaking pieces. He was a known cake stealer apparently, Max could see the eager glint in his honey brown eyes. He was going to have to watch him closely.

While the cupcakes baked, Max shooed Little Daniel into the living room and cleaned up. 

Charles and Lando showed up with balloons and a few decorations which immediately caught Little Daniel’s attention. He was running around the flat playing. Max looked up at his Super Excited ScreamTM to see Little Daniel hugging something to his chest while Charles smiled his Superior Smile That Max HatedTM.

“I’m staying out of it.” Lando called, petting Jimmy who curled in his lap. 

“Maxshy look what Shhaaarrlll gave me!” Little Daniel ran full tilt into the kitchen, his big grin was so infectious that Max could almost ignore the mini Ferrari race suit in his hands. 

“Oh wow! Did you say thank you?” Max found himself saying, it felt like an automatic response he’d heard Victoria use. He knelt to Little Daniel’s level and glared over his head at Charles who looked like the cat who got the cream.

“Shaaarrllllll Tank youuu!!” Little Daniel yelled with glee. Max could feel the excitement zapping through him.

“You should show Jimmy and Sassy their new toys so they don’t feel left out.” Max suggested and Little Daniel gasped at the idea. Then he was off, grabbing the toys they’d gotten at the shops and running to find the two feline troublemakers.

“I think he likes it.” Charles grinned, “you can’t go hiding it mate, we all know he got it now.”

Max made a face and Lando laughed. It was fine, he would figure something out.

Thankfully the race suit was forgotten when the cupcakes came out of the oven. Little Daniel demanded everyone decorate and Max couldn’t hold onto his anger– not when he watched Little Daniel try to be sneaky and steal bits of cupcake. Max let him get away with a couple pieces before he started tickling him in response. 

The cupcakes were decorated as one would expect from three formula 1 drivers with not one artistic bone in their bodies and a 5 year old who wanted to eat the frosting more than use it. Little Daniel insisted on singing the happy birthday song, even as Sassy ran away the moment they started singing.

All in all, Max thought it was a good day. Even if Charles put Little Daniel in the race suit and he insisted on sleeping in it.

Max took comfort in the fact that at least he was clutching the Max pillow while he slept that night.

[luza-wayne]

an important question.

miya osamu x reader

1.8k words

osamu bby! hope you enjoy this!

the sliding door opened and you quickly turned around and smiled at the person who just went in.

“welcome!” you and your workmates said, everybody's reflex making everyone speak in chorus.

when the customer settled for a seat, you quickly walked to them and pulled out your notebook and pen.

“good afternoon, what would you like to have today?” 

“yes. i’ll have today’s special.” they answered, smiling.

“roger.” you said as you wrote it down. you turned around and looked at the kitchen’s door where the cook patiently waited for orders.

“today’s special for one!” you shouted and he gave you a thumbs up to say he's got it.

as you were about to clean out one of the tables, you heard the door open again.

“welcome!” 

i think we're going to have a busy day today. 

… 

“phew…” you exhaled.

“(y/n),” the owner who also manages the counter calls. “please do the honor.” he joked.

you chuckled as you made your way to the entrance.

you turned the signage around and showed the ‘closed’ side. 

finally, you sighed.

you walked back in after you picked up the board outside. 

“one customer said that there was a graduation ceremony nearby.” your colleague informed everyone.

“so that's why…” you replied.

“let's clean up fast so we can go home already.” the owner ordered and you all headed to your designated cleaning areas and started the work. 

as you were arranging the plates, your workmates called you.

“(y/n), hey.” she said,

you turned around to look at her, but suddenly you're being pushed to the back door.

“eh? why? i'm not done with the plates yet.” you said.

“i’ll do it. i’ll do it. he’s waiting for you. i still owe you a favor for covering for me last time.” she said, giggling while she went back inside.

you knew who she was talking about, so you just thanked her and went to your locker and changed.

you tried your best to be as fast as possible, your feet probably moving faster than shinkansen.

you looked at the clock and noted that he's already waiting for fifteen minutes. fortunately, you're already done packing your things and retouching your makeup. 

you went to say goodbye to your workmates and to the owner.

you opened the backdoor and saw him sitting on the railing wearing earphones and scrolling through his phone, most likely, he's on tiktok.

since he didn't notice you were out already, you walked behind him and covered his eyes with your hands.

“guess who?” you uttered with a slightly different voice.

“damn. hmm… i wonder who… i can't think of anyone… oh my god… who is this?” he replied with the most monotonous voice you've ever heard in your life.

“haha, you're so funny.” you said as you removed your hand off of his eyes.

“why? i played along though?” he asked as he opened to you the plastic bag he was holding. 

“whatever.” you said as you scan for a certain flavor of onigiri in the bag.

he noticed you searching for your usual pick of onigiri.

“ah, shit. sorry, it was sold out today. i told one of my workers to leave some, but he was a newcomer, so he forgot it. pick a different flavor for now. i'll be sure to bring some next time.” he explained as he scuffled through the bunch of onigiri, looking for a certain one.

“here, try this. it's a new flavor. i'm still working on it. if you think it's good enough, then i'll add it to the menu.” he muttered and handed you the food.

“come on, don't say that. you’re pressuring me.” you whined, but still accepted it.

“well, your favorite flavor was also made because you kept inventing and mixing up ingredients, ingredients that are kinda suspicious actually, but who would've thought it'll become a massive hit to the customer.” he muttered as he stood up.

“first of all, i didn't know you put it on the menu and second, that just means that my taste buds are for the masses.” you said and took a bite off of the onigiri. “it's delicious, but it's kinda bland.” you commented.

“of course, i'll put it in. you said you liked it and that i should put it for sale. also, noted. thanks for the review.” he replied. he held you on your waist to silently tell you two to start walking. 

“i was obviously just kidding about putting it for sale! why would you take it seriously?” you told him, looking up at him. all while still continuing to eat. 

he just chuckled at your complaints and then went to grab one onigiri for himself too.

“at least, many people liked it.” he countered. 

“well… of course, i'm glad about that.” you replied.

you squeezed closer to him and rested your head on his side of his chest. he held your body a bit tighter, so that he could guide your body on the way home. 

“anyways, how was your work?” you asked, starting a new topic.

“well, it was quite hectic today.” he started and you hummed as a reply for him to continue his story.

“the newbie i was talking about earlier made a lot of mistakes, but he's getting the hang of it.” he added.

when there is a crossroad, the traffic light is still red. he stopped and looked at the remaining time. there's still a lot left.

you automatically stopped walking too when he did, but didn't bother to look at the lights. you know he'll tell you when it's green already.

while waiting he rested his chin on your head, before planting kisses on your hair. he likes smelling your hair. even after work hours, he said it still smells good and would smell it regardless.

“let's go.” he softly informs you when the lights say go.

responding to his voice, your body just moved on its own and followed the guidance of his hold on your waist.

“how about yours? did your work go well?” he queried next.

“it was so busy today.” you immediately replied, your voice unintentionally made a whining sound, not that you mind him hearing it. “there was a graduation ceremony near our work and a lot of families were celebrating there.” you complained as you wrapped your hands around his body and buried your face on his shirt.

the smell of his perfume is still present. the fragrance that you like the most.

he straight away comforted you by rubbing your back up and down.

“good work.” he chuckled.

you looked up at him, glaring.

“what? why did you laugh?” you asked.

“you're so cute.” he said, without missing a beat.

you immediately hide your face by burying your face once again on his shirt as soon as you feel your face heating up. 

“stop it, idiot.” you said.

“yeah, yeah.” he replied while ruffling your hair.

as you turned a corner, osamu remembered one thing they were talking about earlier. 

“that's right. are you free this weekend?” he asked.

you glanced up at him and tilted your head.

“why?” you told him.

“we're having a vacation with the whole family. wanna come with me?” he nonchalantly asked.

you let go of him and looked at him with a raised eyebrow. 

“are you serious?” you questioned him.

“that was a genuine question.” he answered.

with his family?!

“i-i'll give it a thought.” you replied.

“you don't have to come if you don't want to.” he reminded you as he pulled you closer again and planted a kiss on your forehead.

“i'll understand, don't worry. 'tsumu's also there so i definitely understand.” he snickered.

“it's not about atsumu! i actually get along with him pretty well. ah— that's right, i saw him the other day. he treated me to a drink, haha.” you said, thinking back about that day.

“what?” he halted and of course, because he was holding you close, you stopped too.

“why didn't you tell me about that?” he asked with a serious voice.

you were not an idiot. of course, you know why he's acting like that.

you wrapped your arms around his neck.

“don't worry. he didn't do anything funny. he was quite respectful to be honest. he knows his boundaries.” you smiled at him to calm him down.

he was unsure at first, but he did calm down from his obvious intent to land a punch on his very lovely twin. all thanks to you, though.

it’s not that he doesn’t trust atsumu, it’s just with the current situation, he might blurt out something unnecessary.

“here's my house. thanks for walking me home.” you said as you stood in front of him and tip toed.

“you're welcome, madame.” he replied to you.

noticing that you were tip toeing, he smiled and leaned down.

“thank you.” you said as you kissed his cheek. you smiled at him and he didn't even try to hide his blushing face.

“hey,” he hesitated for a moment.

“hm?” you hummed.

“i just wanna ask… are we—” he looked at you.

he sighed and shook his head sideways.

“nothing. good night.” he uttered, smiling. 

“be careful on your way home, okay? bye-bye.” you said as you turned around and walked inside.

“i will.” he smiled watching you go inside your house.

as soon as he made sure you got inside safely, he started walking towards his house. since he's alone now, he can now walk faster.

when he arrived home, he saw atsumu arriving too.

“why are ya' here?” he asked.

“what? can't i visit my twin's place?” he answered, already sounding offended by his twin's question.

osamu just rolled his eyes and opened the front door.

“did ya' just arrive home too? ya’ sure are late.” atsumu said, looking at his wristwatch. “ah. ya' walk (y/n) home, didn't ya'?” he guessed— right.

“hm… being so clingy with each other and even kissing, on the cheeks, picking her up from her work and even walking her home. are ya' sure ya' two ain't in a relationship?” atsumu smirked.

osamu looked back at him and glared.

“shutting yer' mouth will get ya' dinner, just so ya' know.” he threatened.

atsumu knows it better than anyone else. he really won't give him his home-cooked dinner if he won't shut up. 

osamu walked to the kitchen and started preparing dinner. 

“stupid 'tsumu. i also wanted to ask her that.” 

meanwhile, you turned the lever of the shower and closed your eyes.

i thought he was gonna ask me about our current relationship earlier. you thought as the water hit your skin.

i chickened out earlier. osamu thought as he turned on the stove.

both sighed in defeat.

next time, i’m really going to ask it! they both said for a million times, only to not bring it up tomorrow.

hope you enjoyed that one, because i did. reblogs would be much appreciated!

if you'd like to support me and my broke ass, you can tip me at my ko-fi acc! thank you very much!

[bitterkarella]

Midnight Pals: Substack Attack

Thomas Monteleone: hey everyone you may how last year i got really mad about the blacks and the trans Monteleone: but I've had a year to think about it Monteleone: and I've decided to start a substack Poe: oh no King: oh no Barker: oh no Koontz: oh no Lovecraft: Monteleone: don't worry, i anticipated your interest in my substack Monteleone: so I've taken the liberty of subscribing you all to MONTELEONE'S MUMBLINGS Monteleone: welcome to my twisted world! Monteleone: you're welcome

Monteleone: i was just thinking that, anytime a non-white person wins an award, they probably don't deserve it Lovecraft: wow your ideas are intriguing to me and I'd like to subscribe to your newsletter Monteleone: good news! Monteleone: YOU ALREADY DID!

Monteleone: a bunch of wokescolds got me kicked out of the HWA for being racist and transphobic Poe: wait, you were being racist and transphobic? Monteleone: Monteleone: no wait let me rephrase that Monteleone: a bunch of wokescolds got me kicked out of the HWA JUST for being racist and transphobic

Monteleone: i just got called racist on substack Poe: tell us what happened Monteleone: got called racist on substack Poe: yeah but why? Monteleone: i was being racist Poe: on substack? Monteleone: yeah it was on substack

Monteleone: now some people were mad when i repeated my statements on a podcast Monteleone: but, in my defense, i was drunk at the time Monteleone: c'mon you can sympathize Monteleone: haven't you ever got drunk and done a thing that you regret? King: you're still doing the thing though? Monteleone: oh yeah no i don't regret it

Monteleone: you guys don't seem all that receptive to my viewpoint Monteleone: here, i'm going to list ALL the minorities who stole awards rightfully deserved by Monteleone: writers of a certain lighter, more deserving hue Monteleone: that will definitely get you all on my side Lovecraft: i'm on your side! Monteleone: glad to see SOMEONE around here has some sense

Monteleone: look, when they gave awards to Thomas Ligotti and Graham Masterson Monteleone: that was all white and proper King: you mean right and proper? Monteleone: Monteleone: did i stutter?

Monteleone: but they also gave an award to koji Suzuki??? Monteleone: c'mon who's ever heard of THAT guy! King: he wrote the ring books Monteleone: Monteleone: well I'VE never heard of him Monteleone: and i know of all the white authors

Monteleone: and owl goingback won an award?! Monteleone: now if you ask me Monteleone: that name sounds VERY ETHNIC

Monteleone: so they gave an award to linda addison Monteleone: now she's a nice lady and i consider her a friend Monteleone: but she doesn't deserve any recognition Monteleone: and i'm totally not being racist Monteleone: i literally just said i had a black friend

Lovecraft: ya know, he's got some interesting ideas Lovecraft: why is it that we see fewer awards won by pure Anglo-Saxon writers? Lovecraft: and instead they're giving awards to- King: you've had enough, howard, its time for bed Lovecraft: i'm just asking questions! Lovecraft: he's right tho! Lovecraft: good Anglo-Saxon writers are being ignored in favor of Saracens and Italians? Lovecraft: why, when i heard they gave an award to William Stanley Braithwaite-- Monteleone: see? this guy gets it Lovecraft: Braithwaite didn't deserve that award Monteleone: right on! Barker: you sure you really want to die on this hill, thom Monteleone: he's just tellin' it like it is! Lovecraft: excuse me, let me finish Barker: oh yeah thom you're DEFINITELY going to want to hear what comes next

[rubykgrant]

I have an idea for Sarge, tho it's a bit sad: his parents died when he was a baby. He was born on/near a military base at Mexico-Texas border, a base for both countries. Either his parents were soldiers or were just very close to the location. When his parents died, they hadn't told anyone the baby's name. He was raised by all the soldiers on base. Steel crutches, tank tread training wheels, all true. 57 syllables, Mandarin keyboard, fifth letter emoji? All adopted by the soldiers who raised him

That's a good back-story for him, thank you for sharing it!

I had a slightly similar idea for the "true backstory of Sarge" that I wrote as an interview with Andrews-

“I see you’ve decided not to wait,” she commented, taking her own seat.

“A-course! Save the BEST for FIRST!” he answered proudly. “Besides, listening to everybody else babble for too long might put ‘ya to sleep, and we can’t have that. They’re so easily distracted. Going off on tangents of unrelated topics and what-not,”

“Well, I’m not sure where you want to start-”

“I WAS BORN 29 YEARS AGO! I’VE BEEN THE PROUD LEADER OF RED TEAM FOR 20 YEARS! I CAME INTO THIS WORLD WEARING RED ARMOR, AND I’LL GO OUT OF THIS WORLD WEARING RED ARMOR!”

“Now, now…” Andrews said, her voice both amused and patient. “I won’t be exposing any secrets you want to keep, you’ll have the final word on what information I share publicly, but between the two of us? Let’s try to keep things simple, and honest. After all, we ARE on a first-name basis!”

The old soldier was quiet for a moment. A short moment, but for Sarge, being quiet was about as rare as hen’s teeth.

“Fair enough, Dylan…” he answered at last. “But the name is one of the things we keep quiet about, understand?”

“Absolutely… can I ask one question, though? Just for my own curiosity,” her curiosity often got the best of her, and certainly created problems occasionally… but that was why she was a reporter. Curiosity might have killed the cat, but satisfaction is what kept bringing her back.

“Hmph. Fine. Shoot,”

“I’ve never heard a name like yours before. Just what was the inspiration when it was chosen for you?”

Another quiet moment. Andrews was beginning to think he was simply going to ignore the question, and if that was the case, she would move on rather than press the subject. However-

“When I was born, which was MORE than 29 years ago, I ADMIT IT… m’family didn’t name me right away. Not too many infants survived their first few weeks at the time… it was a different world back then, see- you’re too young, you never lived in a war-zone, but that’s what it was like. So, they waited to see if… well, you know how you’re not supposed to name anything, or else you’ll get attached? ‘Folks were worried about getting attached to ME, because maybe I wasn’t even gonna live too long… but a few weeks went by, then a couple months, and I was still breathin’!” he chuckled a bit to himself before continuing.

“I guess I was the only baby that made it, and the group of survivors my family stayed with- they all supported each other. A whole bunch of people took turns watching over this little bundle of joy! Everybody had a different name they liked to call me, and when it was time to give me a REAL name… it all got combined together. One big name, from more than a dozen different people, who all came from different places, and spoke different languages… I was the only baby any of them had, so I suppose they gave me all the names of… their own kids who couldn’t be with them…”

“That’s… oh, Sarge, I don’t know what to say, that’s INCREDIBLE. It might be the sweetest thing’ I’ve ever heard-” it was true, Andrews didn’t know what it was like to be born directly into a war-zone; and at the time the man sitting in front of her was a child, the Earth had been under attack by enemies from outer space… not to mention all the never-ending fights between humans who decided they hated other humans enough to kill each other. No, she hadn’t lived through that, but she had seen documents and footage.

Many towns and cities were destroyed, and groups of people would try to band together; they formed new little communities, some traveling like nomads, others attempting to stay in one place, but all generally learning to rely on one another for safety and survival. Generations of children were lost during this time… from injury, illness, or lack of food. To think that she was now speaking to somebody who had grown up in that world, protected and nurtured by an extended-family of people who had been brought together by necessity, but stayed together by choice. That choice had, in fact, been to make sure a child could LIVE.

“I know, I know! Tragic and heart-warming… it’s practically Oscar-bait! But remember what we agreed on, not a word to anybody else! Bad enough that whipper-snapper apple-Jax knows…” he grumbled.

“Yes, I understand…” she couldn’t help but get a little choked-up, though.

“And, for the record- I mean, this is OFF the record, make sure to keep it that way! But just so YOU know, I’m not a bit embarrassed about my name! That’s not why I don’t wanna share it… it’s just…” Sarge seemed to struggle to find the words. “The people who named me are gone. All of them. And this wasn’t just my name, it was the name I shared with the all the children they lost… someday, I’m probably going to die on a battlefield, being taken out by an enemy, and God-willing, I’ll be wearing my RED ARMOR, going out with my boots on- but when that happens, whoever kills me… I don’t wanna take the chance of hearing them say that name. It was good name that good people gave me, so…”

“So, you don’t want somebody who hates you to use the name that was made by people who loved you,” Andrews finished.

“Hurrrgh- if you WANT to read into it like that and add lots of mushy, emotional subtext, sure!” Sarge made several grunts and groans, crossing his arms over his chest and turning his helmet away to avoid looking at her.

“You are a surprisingly deep and sensitive individual, Sarge…” Andrews marveled.

“NO I AIN’T! YOU TAKE THAT BACK RIGHT NOW! I AM A ONE-DIMENSIONAL CHARACTER, A FLAT STEREO-TYPE OF ALL GRUFF MILITARY MEN, AND DON’T YOU FORGET IT!” The man now stood up, striking a heroic pose, raising one knee to place a foot upon his now empty chair, both hands clenched into fists and resting against his hips, the visor of his helmet pointed upward.

“I’VE NEVER HAD AN OUNCE OF PERSONAL GROWTH, AND I NEVER WILL! OTHER SOLDIERS WEAR THEIR ARMOR, BUT I AM THE ARMOR! I AM THE BACK-BONE OF RED TEAM! AND THE BRAINS! AND THE FISTS! ALSO, THE WEAPONS IN THE FISTS! IF YOU SAY MY NAME THREE TIMES AFTER SUMMONING BLOODY MARY, I SHOW UP AND SCARE HER OFF! FREDDY KRUEGER HAS NIGHTMARES ABOUT ME! I AM-”

“You are the Reddest Red to ever Red, yes, I know. I’ll be sure to keep that for the interview. That way, everybody will know the REAL you!” Andrews promised. Sarge gave a single nod of his approval, and quickly sat back down, as if nothing had happened.. “But, just in case…”

Sarge made a cartoonishly over-the-top growling noise at this. Andrews ignored that, and pushed on.

“If there is possibly some hidden layers, maybe some insight or… the method to your madness? I do still have a few more questions. As I said before, you’re free to skip anything you don’t want to answer. What do you say, Sarge?”

“Alright. Fine. Hurry up ‘n ask, before I change my mind!” that was settled, it seemed.