#but it's all i've been able to think about since literally the second i realized dorian was leaving | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

leascorner · 1 year ago

Text

j.s. | Welcome home

Summary: After a mission, Jake gets some well deserved break at home. However the week might not turn out how he had planned.

Pairing: Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin x childhood bff!f!reader

Warnings: Angst, mention of death and near death experience, mention of break-up, probably inexact american army facts, ever most likely inexact description of Texas, mention of food, two idiots in love, happy ending

Word Count: 9.2k

A/N: I've said it before, I will say it again. The only trope that I can write/read about Jake is a childhood/best friends to lovers, don't fight me. I also see Jake as an older brother to two half-sisters his mother had with a very good man, after his father abandonned them. This is my canon.

Anyway, this is way too long and way too chaotic but I just couldn't stop writting so enjoy!

Masterlist

Y/N was literally hopping up and down with impatience - or perhaps was it the three cups of coffees she had drunk to be able to keep up with the 2-hour-long drive to the airport in the middle of the night. She was standing on the arrival floors, on her tiptoes, trying to locate the person she was picking up. The flow of travellers coming through the arrival doors was continuous, so many blond heads coming through and none of them was his.

Her childhood best friend’s flight had landed a dozen of minutes prior; 3:28 a.m. was the time she received a “be right there, see you soon” text. Ever since then, the seconds had been going past very - very - slowly and with every second passing, Y/N chest had got narrower from anticipation to the point she felt like she couldn’t breathe. It hadn’t been more than a year and a half now that they had seen each other in the flesh. Of course, there were the texts, the emails and the FaceTime calls, but it was never the same.

“Jake!”

The sea of people in front of them seemed to split in half to let them collide in one another. The said Jake let his bag fall to his feet to catch a flying Y/N, lifting her from the ground as if she weighted nothing. Her hands found the back of his neck and her head found the crook of his neck, reuniting their bodies as if they were only one mind.

“Hey sweetheart,” he sniffed her hair, intoxicating himself from her perfume.

Jake let her down reluctantly when he realized they were in the way of other people reunions. After swinging his bag over his shoulder and dragging her near a row of seats, he finally took a good look at her, dark circles under puffy red eyes and hair all other the place. He dried her tears softly and kissed the top of her head, something he was sure he hadn’t done since they were in high school and that fucker of Chad had broken up her heart - thinking of it now, it seemed like it was a lifetime away. However, he knew that in this moment there was no sadness in her tears. She was crying probably a little happiness to seeing him again, but most certainly a lot of relief to have him alive in front of her.

He took another step back to have an even greater look at her. Y/N was exactly how he last saw her one year or so ago, and exactly how she looked like even all the other times he had to leave. She did not seem to age, and he was sure that the fine smile lines she was now wearing had always been there. It brought comfort to his heart to know that whatever would happen, she would always be waiting for him. He knew it was also selfish, but he had made peace with those thoughts a long time ago. These were moments that he was collecting in his mind for when he was somewhere overseas, fighting for his life.

“My my, did you grow up a few inches?”

“Oh, shut up!” Y/N laughed and tried to nudge him in the ribs. Jake easily grabbed her right elbow to bring her closer in another embrace, so very glad to be home, even only for a little while.

Ventilation was swinging litters of hot air into the car's cabin as it was a rather chilly night for October in Texas. The full moon was lighting up all the roads in front of them, just as if it was making sure they would get home safely.

During the drive, the main discussion turned around how excited everyone would be to have him there. Y/N and her parents were the only ones to know about Jake’s surprise visit; they had only known for about three days before his flight landed that he unexpectedly got a week of leave. They would surprise his family later that day for lunch - only after they both had a rather long nap to make up for the sleepless night.

Jake had seen his family a couple more times than Y/N this past year and a half. Even if he considered Y/N to be family, this wasn’t exactly the rule of the administration. Blood family had some more privileges, like sometimes visiting for the holidays. His mother and one of his little sisters also visited him in Singapore when he was stationed there for an exercise in the Taiwan Strait; they had booked a vacation to be able to see him there. Y/N, at that time, had been unavailable - she had her own life after all.

It was what Jake found the more difficult; to keep up with her life. Most of her friends were common friends from high school. With her going to a different university and later with her different jobs, some of her friends were total strangers to him. However, they all seemed to come and go into her life, leaving more or less damage.

“I am sorry about you and Nick.”

Y/N finished getting back to the right line of the highway and removing the blinker, before glancing quickly in Jake’s direction. He was looking at her, with an expression she couldn’t quite read, but that she understood as some kind of gladness. She sighed while turning her focus back on the road.

“You can lie better than that, Jake.”

“Well, didn’t like the guy so…”

It had been a couple of months now than her longtime boyfriend Nick and she had broken up. What confused Jake the most was how this was not a topic for discussion. She hadn’t called crying; she did not seem to be angry. She just announced it to him like it was nothing and directly switched subject. He hadn’t found a way to bring it back on the table, so he asked their friends and family. They all had the same answer; she was doing fine. She seemed to have continued her life just like nothing had happened.

“Was it him-”

“It was me,” Y/N cut him off quickly abruptly, leaving Jake with an uneasy feeling. She sighed again, probably realizing how harsh her tone had been. “This wasn’t working out anyway.”

Though she could not see him, Jake nodded back acknowledging her response. He still felt like there were more to it, but he understood that now wasn’t the time to discuss it. Ever since they had known each other - and it went back to kindergarten, they hadn’t had many secrets for one another. And if they had, it was never anything major.

So, he shook off this feeling and gently grabbed her hand resting on the gearshift to squeeze it softly.

“I do am sorry, though.”

“I know.”

It was nearly six in the morning when Y/N pulled up in her parents’ driveway.

The porch light was on, welcoming them, making sure Jake knew he was expected, and it made him smile fondly. It still felt surreal somehow; after everything, he was home. Getting out of the car, he breathed the fresh air of Texas like he hadn’t breathed in years.

Y/N was already opening her trunk, getting out a duffel bag that seemed to contain some clothes for today. Jake jogged toward her before she was able to get his own khaki bag out. She rolled her eyes, smiling, when he gently slapped her hands away to take care of it.

“Mom set up a spare bed in my room,” Y/N informed him while walking to the front door. “Just like the old days.”

And nothing in the house had changed either.

The hallway was still a drive along memories with all sorts of pictures hanged upon the wall. Y/N’s parents wedding portrait. Y/N’s baby pictures. Y/N on the day of the start of her first kindergarten year - just before they met each other. A couple more of first day of school pictures - this time with him in it as well. A couple of family vacation pictures. And along with them, a couple of pictures of events he wasn’t even there to attend. Y/N’s university graduation, her parents’ thirty-year anniversary celebration party, her first promotion celebration dinner…

The kitchen was still on the right, the living room on the left and straight ahead the stairs to the bedrooms. Y/N’s bedroom still had Justin Timberlake poster hung up on the walls along with some pictures of friends and family. The teddy bear he won for her at the funfair when they were not even ten stood on her bed. Jake swore that if he opened the dresser, he would still find the shelf that was for his stuff back then.

Without many words, both of them got ready for bed. Y/N took the en-suite bathroom first and when Jake got back in his sweatpants, she was already in bed, cuddling Mister B the teddy bear. His chuckle made her look up to him with sleepy eyes and quickly look away when she realized he didn’t wear a shirt. He kissed her on her forehead before tugging her more tightly in her sheets and turning off the bedside lamp.

“Do you remember when I couldn’t sleep unless someone was holding my hand?”

Jake only hummed in answer, and even in the darkness of her room, his hand found hers instinctively. Their fingers intertwining immediately, he did just as he had promised when he was only just a kid; he never let it go.

“Son,” Y/N’s father spoke from the other side of the kitchen, “don’t worry about it.”

Jake shook his head, smiling, before proceeding with what he was already doing: loading the cup he had used to drink coffee in the dishwasher. Ever since he had been up earlier that morning, Y/N’s parents had pampered him with all their attention while also being busy preparing lunch. Every time he asked if they needed help, they would assure him he just needed to stay put in his seat.

It had always been like this, for as long as he had remembered. Whenever he had gone over when Y/N and he were still in middle school, her parents had always taken good care of him, making sure the crust of his PB&J sandwiches were cut off, putting on his favourite beddings when they were having a sleepover, drying his clothes in the air dryer when they came home soaking wet from the park. He felt loved in a different way than he did at home, where he had a hard time adjusting to his new family dynamics with his two younger step-sitters. Growing up, they continued on listening to him and caring for him. Y/N’s father was the one he went to for advice before he enrolled. Ever since, and with the little time he had with them every time he came home, it still hit him in the face how much they loved him like he was their own son.

“Do you need help with anything?” He asked once more.

This time, they did not have time to answer. Y/N appeared on the doorstep, changed out of her pyjamas, hair still wet. “The shower is all yours, Jake.”

She watched him go as if she had to make sure he remembered the way to her room. She hadn’t really realized yet that he was really here, with them, and feared that he would just disappear at any minute or that she would just wake up from whatever dream she was having. Somehow this also seemed to be all too familiar, like a play they had rehearsed a hundred time before. It broke her heart a little to know this was most likely not going to happen again before a very long time, that it could actually never happen again.

Y/N got this thought out of her head as soon as it came. She didn’t need to think about this. Not now. Not ever. She just needed to enjoy whatever time she had with him at home.

“He looks good,” her mum stated once Jake had made it to the top of the stairs.

“Yeah, he does,” Y/N spoke softly, eyes lingering to where Jake had been only a couple of seconds before, suddenly wondering if he was really as good as they thought.

When Jake got back to the kitchen the entrance clock had just struck eleven. Only sixty minutes until he would be reunited with his family. It never felt more real, but he couldn’t quite realize it. He was so used of being far away from them, totally disconnected from their realities, hearing their news after everyone else. Yet, he had always found them as he had left them, eyes watering to see him home or gone.

He joined Y/N on the vegetable preparation. Washing, peeling, cutting kept him busy while the anticipation started to build up. All while Y/N’s father asked him about what new manoeuvres he had learned. Being an aviator himself, they could talk about flying for hours to Y/N’s greatest damn; she had the biggest fear of flying - and perhaps the fact that Jake nearly crashed them while flying an old aircraft he had restored with her father when they were teenagers had something to do with it.

“These boys,” Y/N’s mother sighed playfully as Jake and Y/F/N were debating whatever solar planes were the future of aviation. Y/N smiled as she shared a knowing look with her mother, who was getting ready to lay the table in the dining room.

“Mom, hold on,” Y/N called before reaching inside the cupboard next to her, “you are missing a plate.”

“Why? Is Mark coming after all?”

Y/M/N’s face went white in only a second as she realized what she had just said. Not knowing what to do else, Y/N handed her the white plate. Looking sideways to Jake, she hoped he hadn’t heard - she didn’t want him to find out like this, when his whole family was going to be here in the next thirty minutes.

It was already too late though; Jake’s attention had of course switched to their awkward interaction. Her father was quick to step in, wiping his hands on a cloth and moving towards his wife.

“Of course he is, darling. Let me help you bring those into the dining room.”

Y/N watched them disappear before quickly turning back to the carrots she was now cutting in a Julienne, praying Jake would just drop the subject. Ever since she had learned that Jake was having a leave, she had planned their reunion to be perfect. She had purposely lied to his family, pretending to have a very big news to share with them so they all agreed to gather even if the atmosphere was not good. She had made them promise to bury the hatchet, for “her” and most absolutely for Jack. Whatever touchy topics they would have to talk about, they could do it after.

“Why wouldn’t he come?” Jake still asked and, at that moment, she knew that whatever she would tell him would never be sufficient to not draw his suspicion any further. She couldn’t lie to him even if she tried.

“Just been busing with work lately, you know how it is.”

Without letting him time to ask more questions, Y/N went for the stoves to make sure the sauce was still reducing as it should have. She could feel Jake’s eyes burning holes on her back and could only hope he would drop the subject.

“Jake, son,” Y/F/N had just gotten back from the dining room, “would you mind giving me a hand with the roast?”

After taking a last look at Y/N, still very focused on stirring the sauce, Jake turned to her father. It wasn’t until she didn’t feel his eyes on her that she turned to look at him. She watched as her father made him took out the turkey so he could put some more butter on it. Out of the corner of his eye his father gives him a reassuring wink signalling her he had got this.

The bell rang at the exact same moment Y/N put the last plate of hors d’oeuvres at the centre of the table. Shooting a look across the piece, she saw her father squeezing Jake’s shoulder in what seemed to comfort him. She smiled shyly, trying to hide her own nervousness. Thanks to her father, Jake had nearly forgotten about the earlier incident about Mark and the reason he wouldn’t have been able to make it. He hadn’t asked any other questions, and they hadn’t given away other secrets. All was well in the best of all words, or so she still tried to convince herself. It was all that mattered.

“Just like we said, you both stay here, and we’ll bring them for you.”

Y/N watched as her parents disappeared in the hall. She turned to Jake who she now realized he was close at her side - she knew from the way his lips were set in a tight smile that he was somehow nervous. When noises started coming from the hall, Y/N grabbed Jake’s hand without thinking. She needed him to know she was there, that she would always be there, just like they promised when they were younger. It would take much more than a thousand of miles and a few hiccups to take them apart. As if he was thinking the exact same thing, Jake squeezed her hand back.

Jake’s step-dad was the first to enter the dining room. Y/N saw his eyes go from herself to Jake right next to her side, his eyes lighting up in realization. Yet, he didn’t say anything, holding a finger to his lips to let them know he would stay silent while moving further into the room as if nothing had happened. He and Jake had never been particularly close; he was a good man, a good husband, and a good father to his daughters, but Jake’s fatherly figure had always been Y/N’s father.

Next to enter the room was Jake’s youngest step-sister, Sophia. She immediately spotted him, letting out a cry and running into his arms. He crushed his sister in one of those same hugs he gave Y/N when she picked him up from the airport. It warmed her heart to see them like that. Sophia was still very young when Jake had enrolled; she was only just a kid and had grown up with the lack of his older brother. She was looking up to him so much that Y/N had sometimes to remind her that he didn’t have only qualities. He was her hero in so many ways…

Sophia’s reaction got the rest of the family - his mother, Olivia, his other step-sister, and his step-brother, Mark - in the dining room quite quickly. There were a lot of ��Jake!” shouted from across the room and loads of tears, happy smiles, and hugs.

“I can’t believe he is here.” Sophia cried again; this time she was in Y/N’s arms. “And I can’t believe you lied to us.”

“Sorry not sorry,” Y/N smiled, tugging a string of her hair behind her ears before bringing her in an even closer hug if it was possible. She wasn’t sure she had seen her this happy in her life, she realized.

Y/N was an only child with a very little family. Over the years, Jake’s family had grown to be her own as well. As children first, as they were always all together at either one’s house or the others. As teenagers when his step-sisters weren’t babies anymore and they had started to be able to play more with them. She remembered helping his mom getting both of his sisters ready for school, all of them celebrating Christmas at her parents or going dress shopping for Olivia’s first prom.

Ever since Jake had been deployed on the West Coast and later overseas, they had grown even closer. There were brunches on Sundays, just the three of them, where Sophia would file them up on her latest dating adventures. There were lunches at Olivia’s office after they had taken a midday yoga class. There were breakfasts with Sophia before her classes began. Y/N had always made sure they were alright, as if she had to do it for Jake.

So far, the lunch had turned out great.

Jake had told them all about his last position and this group of pilots he had been joining overseas. Everyone had started feeding him bits and pieces of what had occurred ever since the last time he’s been home. Olivia and Mark had managed not to fight, which was a miracle in itself, per Y/N’s opinion. Jake’s mom had finally stopped crying. And Sophia seemed to have forgotten about those hard choices she would have to make once she graduated from college at the end of the year.

At least, that was the case until Jake asked about it.

“So, any thoughts yet about what you’ll do next year?”

“No, not really.”

Y/N had already seen that look on Sophia’s face. It was the same one she made when she was hesitating between an avocado toast and pancakes at the place they were used to going to brunch; every time she had been making this face, she had ended up with ordering both. Sophia eyed her tentatively and Y/N immediately shook her head no, silently pleading her not to do whatever she was thinking.

Today was not the day. Jake had only gotten back from abroad hours ago, they would have enough time to discuss it in the next couple of days.

“I am thinking of enrolling,” Sophia stated abruptly.

Boom.

The bomb had landed.

Y/N sighed, mentally cursing Sophia for needing whatever validation from him. They all had talked about this extensively for months on now. Decide to enrol was one thing, accept that one of your relative would do the same was another. She knew how Jake was; he didn’t look like it at first sight, but his family was his everything. He had made the selfish decision that could result in them losing him forever, yet he wouldn’t accept that she’d do the same.

From the deathly silence that came after Sophia’s statement, Y/N rested the cutlery on the side of her plate, bracing herself for whatever had to come. Her attitude made Jake immediately turned to her. She had never seen the wrinkle between his eyebrows this deep before. She didn’t know if it was from dread, disappointment, or anger.

“You knew?”

Jaw tight, Y/N didn’t answer, and Jake huffed - of course, she knew. How could she not? She was here, with his own family, when he was thousands of miles away fighting for his country. She was here, only a ride away, when he couldn’t even remember the last time he had enough telephone network to FaceTime them. She was there, physically with them, when he was just a ghost, present for a few days a year before disappearing for months on hand.

Y/N tried to reach out for his left arm to try and calm the whole situation down, but he moved ever so slightly she couldn’t touch him. The fire in Jake’s green eyes was incandescent. He was angry, with Sophia, with her, with everyone. And to know he didn’t even know half of it…

“Let’s not start now,” his older step-sister stepped in to try and reason him.

“Why?” Jake retorted immediately. “Wanna updates me on what is going on with Mark as well?”

Olivia opened her mouth to answer and as she couldn’t seem to find something to say, she then closed it and lowered her head. She and Mark had officially announced a few weeks before Jake returned that they were going to take some time apart. They had been married for nearly three years and they were having a rough path. They had started couple therapy, trying to make things work. Y/N couldn’t count the hours Olivia had spent on her couch, crying and eating ice-creams.

Y/N knew exactly how she felt like. The deception of thinking she had found the love of her life only to realize it was more complex than this. The sadness of loving someone and it still not being enough for the two of them to be happy. The paralyzing fear of being alone, of never being well enough.

She needed a shoulder to cry onto and a lot of love, and not to be reminded of what a failure she thought she was.

“I am sorry,” Sophia mumbled. Y/N wasn’t sure to whom she was apologizing. Jake? Them?

“You can’t seriously be thinking about it?” Jake half-shouted, pointing her finger at her like he was accusing her of the worst betrayal.

“Don’t say anything you’d regret, son.”

Y/N’s father word seemed to put some sense into him as he leaned his back against his chair, folding his arms against his chest. The distress on Sophia’s face was now palpable and she was on the verge of crying from Jake’s quite violent reaction. Though she didn’t expect Jake to be totally supportive, Y/N had not expected him to reject the idea that much either. She had thought that he would’ve still listen to her reasons, maybe try to talk her out of it, but finally make peace with the idea. Just like they had. Just like they all had when he was in her shoes.

Olivia had regained her composure and wrapped an arm around her sister’ shoulders. The look she sent Jake probably refrained him from attacking again his little sister. Instead, he chose another target for his anger.

“How can anybody be cool with this?”

Before Jake’s mom could speak, Y/N called him out. “Why could you do it and not her, Jake, huh?” She wants to be like you so bad, don’t you see?

“That’s not the same thing.”

Y/N huffed and rolled her eyes.

It made her even bitter. For all the things he hadn’t told her when he had no reason to hide it from her. For him being hurt that they didn’t want to discuss as such important topics over the phone. She would have liked to be sorry to hide all this from him, yet his reaction had only comfort her on her choice.

“You’re being unfair.”

“Am I now?” he laughed. “Excuse me for putting my life at sake and not wishing for me sister to do the same.”

“Did anybody ask you to? If anything, we would all have loved to keep you by our side.”

“Oh, I see. So, this is all my fault, right?”

The daring look he offered her made her heart jump in her chest. Her stomach was in fire; consuming her from the inside. She was tired from the sleepless nights she had for the last few months. And sad about the outcome of this lunch. And disappointed in him. And quite frankly done with his attitude.

Sighing, she gave in and looked away, throwing her napkin on her plate at the same time. Whatever this was, it was too much for her to handle. “If you’d excuse me,” she announced as she moved her chair back. “I am not hungry anymore.”

“Y/N-” he called after her, grabbing her arm to make her stay. She gave him a pained look before abruptly pulling away from his grip.

“Welcome home, Jake.”

Jake’s face appeared once again on her phone screen.

Big bright smile, sunglasses on the bridge of his nose, forehead sun-kissed by the first rays of sunshine of spring. The picture had been taken one of the few times she had fly out to California to visit him. They had such a good time that Y/N used to hold all those memories close to her heart. Now, she couldn’t even look at it.

She couldn’t count the number of texts Jake had sent nor the number of messages he had left on her voice mail. She hadn’t read nor listened to any of them and had even decided to turn off her phone at some point during the night. She needed some time alone to take a breath and to swallow the disappointment that was forming a lump in her throat.

Despite the emotional roller coaster this day had been, she hadn't fallen asleep until late in the night, turning over in the sheet nonstop while thinking of all the comebacks she could have said to his face. And like every other night for months now, when she had finally managed to get some sleep, her worst nightmare had woken her up a couple of hours later.

It only made her feel worse and she cried all the tears in her body. It was like whatever emotion she had retained in the last year had come back to her like a wrecking ball. She was angry for all sorts of reasons all linked to Jake one way or another. She was also very sad of the situation she found herself into, of Jake having spoiled their reunion, of the spectacle she had given in front of her loved ones.

So, when she turned on her phone a few hours later, eyes still puffy and red from the lack of sleep and the crying, she didn’t hesitate to turn down his call when his smiley face appeared on her phone screen. At that time, she discovered the multiple texts and missed calls of her parents and Jake’s sisters. She sent them a quick group message, letting them know she was fine and that she would catch up later. Leaving her phone on the kitchen counter, she got ready for her day.

Her phone rang four more times while she was getting ready. She was now determined to let him know to leave her alone. She was still pissed, and she needed to compose herself. This was without counting on the doorbell ringing when she was about to answer her phone.

Stopping whatever she was doing, she made the few steps from the kitchen counter to her apartment door, opening it without even thinking who she would find behind. Much to her surprise it was the only person she didn’t want to see. Jake. Standing there, phone in his hand.

“Oh, come on!” he exclaimed when she nearly shut the door in his face.

He stopped it before it was fully closed and after a deep sigh, Y/N let him in without even giving him a look. She closed the door behind him, passing him - still without looking at him - and went to the living room. She leaned against the kitchen counter, crossing her arms on her chest much like he had done during lunch just the day before.

Jake stood in the middle of the room, watching around him. It was the first time he was in her new place, the one she started rented after she broke up with her long-term boyfriend. It wasn’t much, only a one-bedroom apartment with a sanitized decor - she hadn’t had the heart to make it her own. It was close to her work and not a too long drive from her parents; it was all she really needed.

Y/N studied him in silence. He must not have had the memo about the Texas weather at that time of the year as he was only wearing a beige sweater, sleeves rolled up. It wasn’t much of a surprise he had forgotten how it was; he had spent so little time home in the last ten years.

When her eyes finally got to his face, she realized he was now staring at her. She tried reading him like she could before, but what she found in his eyes, she couldn’t interpret. Perhaps something had been broken between them. Perhaps there were only so much absence someone could handle. Perhaps they had let the miles come in between them for real this time.

She couldn’t tell how long they stayed like this before he finally spoke.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Long gone was the hope she had that he would apologize.

Jake had never been one to be wrong; he was probably even the most stubborn person she had ever met. Though she liked this confidence in him, she also knew it was hiding something much deeper. His trauma of being abandoned by his father when he was still a toddler. The fear of his loved ones realizing what a failure he was, despite everything he had already accomplished. The fear of never being enough.

He had assured her it wasn’t one of the reasons he had enrolled, and she knew he was lying to her just as much he was lying to himself. But she wasn’t her twenty-something-self; she wasn’t going to protect his feelings anymore. Now that they didn’t have an audience, she could lay her cards on the table.

“Do you mean, just like you didn’t tell us about the ejection seat accident that you had six months ago?”

She saw his face drop ever so slightly before he regained his composure back. She wasn’t the only one keeping things from him, yet contrary to him, the things she was keeping a secret weren’t really hers anyway.

“How would you know?”

“Javy called me that time,” she stated dryly, memories of the call she got in the middle of the night flowing to her head. She still had nightmares about it most nights. “He wanted me to know in case your brain injury worsened, and they had to call your family.”

This secret, she had never told anyone and had carried the weight of it on her own until now. She had smiled and assured everyone that all was fine for the days - sixteen in total - they didn’t hear from him; how could he, he had been literally in a 24h surveillance at the hospital. She had had Javy on the phone to report every little detail he had of Jake’s evolution. She hadn’t had sleep for weeks straight and had nearly cried when Jake had called him after a very busy and unexpected mission he took part in - another way for putting he had just got cleared from the hospital.

“It was nothing.”

“It wasn’t nothing, Jake! You got banned from flying for six weeks. Six fucking weeks!”

“And yet, it wasn’t the first time I ended up in the hospital, nor was it the last time. You know that’s part of the job.”

Y/N snorted.

Like hell she knew. The job description went with never being in the same time zone as your loved ones, missing every single milestone in their life, putting his very own safety at risk so they could all be free and safe, and omitting all details of the national security missions to which he was taking part. She was pretty sure though there was no line in his contract about lying about his health, especially when he could have died, to his family.

For some reason, this whole situation had made his absence even worse. She realized he didn’t feel safe to let them know when things had gone bad; if this time she had known, she couldn’t even imagine all those other times Javy hadn’t been there to inform her. It had awakened a visceral (and most likely also irrational) fear in her. She couldn’t bear the thought of losing him and she still wasn’t ready to accept it.

“Why is this such a big deal when you knew what was going in here and didn’t even tell me?”

If she hadn’t been this tired, Y/N would have probably walked to him to slap him. How could he compare his near-death experience to his sisters’ decisions? How could any of it be equivalent?

“This was not my truth to tell,” she only replied blankly.

Yes, she wasn’t very proud of hiding things from Jake and lying on purpose. But she wasn’t thirteen any longer and when people confided in her - when she promised she wouldn’t tell him anything - she wasn’t going to go running to her best friend to spill all the tea.

“Will you then tell me the truth about what really happened between you and the other dickhead?”

“I already told you everything,” she answered dryly, a little bit too quickly for it not to be suspicious.

“I don’t believe you.”

Y/N knew from the sound of his voice it was pure provocation. He gave her the same daring look she had just seen the day before - the same consuming flame was in his eyes - and she could see his infamous smirk dawning on his lips. She wondered why he wanted to prove just how right he was - how he was always right - so bad. It made her skin scramble how infuriating he was.

She didn’t answer right away and stared at him, arms crossed on her chest a little bit tighter to protect herself. Everything that was happening was only making her angrier towards him. He had ruined everything, and he had just decided to continue on doing so.

She had dreamt about him coming home for months and months, to have him by her side and now, she could only wish for him to go away. The anger, the pain, the animosity; it was all too much. She couldn’t keep up anymore.

“What do you want me to tell you, huh? How much of a great boyfriend and man he was, but that it still wasn’t enough? How much a horrible person I am for not being able to fall in love with a person that would devote his own life to try and make me happy?”

Jake opened his mouth to respond, but closed it as the words sank in. It all made sense to him suddenly. Why she seemed to be relieved it was all over. Why she didn’t call him after he broke her heart. Why, on the rare occasion he had discussed the break-up with his sisters, they had never talked badly about her ex-boyfriend. He didn’t break her heart. He never did.

She was the one breaking his.

“Why didn’t you just tell me?” he asked, this time his voice much softer.

How could she? When it all started with his accident - that she wasn’t even supposed to know of. When it took her five years of a stable relationship to realize her longtime boyfriend had never have been the person she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. When it took her half of her adult life to understand she had been lying to herself for almost all her life and that even now, she didn’t know her truth from her lies any more.

Knowing the truth, Jake didn’t know what to say. He wanted to feel sorry, he wanted to tell her he was. But was he really? It would be lying to say he didn’t exult when he had heard of the break-up... On the day she introduced him to Nick, they he had discussed - quite vividly - about the country actions in Afghanistan - one of the campaigns he had just come home from - and from that day, Jake had just decided he wouldn’t like the man. He hadn’t been very subtle about disliking him, but in his opinion, Nick had paid him back in his own coin: monopolizing Y/N whenever Jake had her on the phone, making her choose between the two of them when he had had the opportunity to fly her oversea. He still felt nauseous to recall how Y/N had seemed to only look at him every time Nick was in the room with them.

He made a few steps in her direction, going to comfort her, but Y/N only shook her head. She wouldn’t let any of this go so easily. It wasn’t because she had confided in him, that he now knew all the truth from her part, that everything else would be forgotten. There were still a lot of unspoken truth to uncover.

“Why are you really here, Jake?”

“What do you mean?”

“The reason you got this leave, what is it?”

They stood less than a metre away, eyes in eyes. Jake never felt so vulnerable as every time she looked at him as if she could read his soul. He knew she was looking for something. Something he couldn’t give her.

Looking away, he answered, “It’s nothing.”

“That’s what I thought.”

Y/N slipped away before he could even react. He watched as she turned back towards the front door. She opened it without a word and looked into his eyes as she stood leaned against it.

“Goodbye, Jake.”

And this time, he didn’t even try to fight.

Javy: Hey, got Hangman on the phone today. You okay?

Y/N: Did he vent at you for calling me that one time?

Javy: Almost.

Javy: He wasn’t really angry though. Just frustrated I guess.

Y/N: I bet. Wasn’t really the nice little break he must have planned.

Javy: If there is anything to learn from all this it is that truth is better spoken from the person they apply to.

Javy: You should talk to him.

Y/N: Yeah well I’ll see about that.

Jake was very nervous, and he wasn’t very nervous a lot.

In fact, he was pretty sure the last time he was that nervous was when he had picked Y/N up for their senior prom. Just like every year since starting high school, she had been his date - though Chad nearly had taken her away from him, but this dumbass had broken up with her only a couple of weeks before prom. That year, for some reason, everything felt different. High school years were coming to an end, they were both going to different universities. Everything was about to change, and it would never be the same. Jake had dreaded taking their relationship to the next level. If only he had known that despite going to different universities, Jake enrolling and basically the two of them living their life in parallel, their relationship had made it.

More or less so... It had been three days now since the lunch at her parents, two since their other discussion - if he would call this an argument, he was still unsure - and today was the first time he was seeing her since then.

After spending time with his family, he was on his way to meet with some of their childhood friends. Normally, Y/N was one of them and she had been invited. But with the recent events, he didn’t know if she would be here. He had had time to reflect on what had been said and finally had apologized to her voice mail as she wouldn’t let his calls through. He had given her plenty of time and space, sending in only a couple of good mornings and good nights texts, just like he was used to. Yet he didn’t know what to expect.

When he spotted her already sat at the table he had booked, his heart started pounding furiously. It gave him hope not everything between them had been broken.

“Hey,” Jake greeted Y/N softly when he had gotten at her level.

Y/N only nodded, barely looking at him, before continuing her discussion with their friend, Monica, like nothing had happened. Jake swallowed the lump in his throat before continuing to greet everyone around the table.

In all those diners they had had with their friends when he had been home, she would have been sat next to him, so close but merely touching. He would have had his arm resting nonchalantly on the back of her chair. He would have whispered all sorts of things in her ears, and she would have laughed open light-heartedly at every single one of his jokes.

That night, she was sat as far as possible from him and he had difficulty focusing on the group discussion, his mind going back to her every time. He probably went the whole evening looking at her not so subtly in the hope she would like to give him a look. She did not.

“You good?” Matt, sat at his side, asked him after the main course.

“Yeah,” Jake answered though the little tremor in his voice didn’t reflect confidence.

“Just give her a little time. It’s just a lot, y’know.”

Jake only nodded.

The problem was indeed just that: time. His flight back was in two days now and she was supposed to be his ride. He knew she would be able to drop him off without speaking a word, while he sat there in the agonizing silence. He was sure he was not able to do it for a couple of hours, he couldn’t imagine what it would be to not have her speak to him every again. He couldn’t get back to combat with Y/N still mad at him. He needed to fix things. He had been able to do it with his sisters; he had to do it with Y/N.

Indeed, the lunch had finished soon after Y/N’s dramatic departure. His sisters hadn’t spoken another word to him, and Y/N’s parents had tried to maintain some semblance of a conversation. Jake had taken a quick walk to clear his mind before going to his parents.

He had sat down with Olivia first and then Sophia, so they could tell him everything that had been going on. He sat there listening to what they had to say until they were done. There had been a lot of crying on their side (only a tiny little bit on his side - most likely because he had a dust in the eye, he would say). In the end, they had hugged and laughed and remembered that they loved each other and that nothing could be more important than that.

He had realized Olivia seemed much more at peace, somehow differently but also similarly to Y/N’s. She had so many plans on her side - buying a house, planning a trip to Europe, getting a puppy – as if she had just discovered she could be a unique person outside her marriage and she genuinely was happier.

The talk with Sophia had been a little bit more sensitive. The idea of her enrolling made his blood boiling, but he had remained calm – or at least tried to - and listened to her reasons. If he was afraid to see himself in her, her reasons were solely different than his. She didn’t want this only to do like him; it was more that he had paved the way for her. He had made her promise to think some more about it - at least, graduate from college before deciding anything - and he had promised to be supportive. He would have some work on himself, but he would cross that bridge when he’d get there.

They had of course talked about Y/N and how she was carrying the whole family on her shoulders. She always made sure everyone was alright, answering her phone at 3 a.m. to pick up Sophia from a frat party gone wild, welcoming Olivia in her tiny apartment - giving her the only bed to sleep on the couch, despite her protest - the time she turned things round after Mark and she had decided to take some time apart. She even made sure their mother was alright when his step-dad was away for business, bringing her homemade meals that she only had to heat up and keeping her company.

If he always knew what an amazingly caring person she was, it only proved him right. He would be forever grateful she was the first person to have talked to him on his first day of kindergarten. He would be forever grateful for the woman she was. If he was honest with himself, it all made him love her even more.

He wasn’t ready to watch her from afar - well, from much far away than his current position - but he would do it (or at least try), should she ask him to…

After what seemed to be an eternity, the evening finally came to an end.

Jake didn’t get the opportunity to speak to Y/N though he hesitated multiple times to just call her out or walk to her and demand that they had a chat. She was currently bidding goodbye to everyone in front of the restaurant, and Jake was watching her attentively to ambush her just as soon as she was finished. He didn’t care if he would be rude to anyone by not saying thank you for coming and goodbye; he needed to talk to her.

After she hugged Monica and promised to let her know when she got home safely, she reached for her car key in her bag and made her way to her car without even looking at him. Jake took his luck and followed her. He called after her, but she refused to acknowledge him.

“Can we not?”

“Why?” she turned around suddenly. “Want me to tell you anything else?”

“Y/N, please.”

She only raised an eyebrow before turning back and continuing walking. Too bad for her, Jake wasn’t one to give up this easily. He followed her lead up to her car that she started to unlock to get in. A wave of panic got through him as he could feel her slip away from his fingers and he didn’t want that. If they didn’t have this talk now, he was not sure they would have it at all.

“I only have two days left,” he said, interposing himself between the closed door and her. “Please.”

Y/N froze at only a few centimetres away from him. She seemed to think about what options she had. Unfortunately for her, there just wasn’t much as she couldn’t make Jake move even if she wanted to. So, she chose the reasonable choice. She crossed her arms over her chest and listened.

“I-” he sighed, passing a hand on his face, frustration clearly visible on his face now. “There has been an incident. We lost two men.”

Y/N’s arms immediately dropped to her side; the mask she wore on her face cracked. She could have been angry he lied to her, yet again, but this time, it was too serious. People died. The command had given them time off because of it. It only reminded her it could end at any time. She really could lose him.

“Jake,” she sighed.

“I-”

His voice broke and Y/N didn’t hesitate to go in for a hug. Out of habits, his arms found her waist and he buried his face in her hair. He breathed her perfume in, trying to ground himself and not totally lose it. She was his rock. There were no ways he would still be here if it wasn’t for her waiting for him at home.

He couldn’t lose her.

“I can only imagine the worry I cause you all,” he muttered in her hair. “I didn’t want to add anything to it.”

Y/N grabbed his face with both her hands and forced him to look at her. She wore a small frown on her eyebrows and determination in her eyes. While she was touched he wanted to spare their feelings, not knowing what was going on was even worse. She couldn’t count the number of times she had thought he was dead when an unknown number had called her phone. In order to support him the best way they could, they needed to know.

“Getting you back in one piece is our priority,” she started, voice bold as if she wanted him to engrave her words in his head. “That’s why we are keeping things to ourselves. We don’t want you to worry about us when you should be solely focused on staying alive.”

Jake half-smiled in return, which made Y/N relax a bit. Her hands fall on his shoulder as he kept her close to him, so close that there was no space between their two bodies. They had realized they wanted the exact same thing for one another: for them to be safe and sound.

“I worry about you all, all the time. I worry about you, all the time,” he confessed, his voice still low.

Jake reached out to tuck a loose string of hair behind her ear and Y/N instinctively leaned in his touch. It was like this between them, easy and pure. It always had. Sometimes - like these last past days, they were so caught up in life they seemed to forget what they had was so unique. Every time they had found their way back to each other.

“I left you alone while I am off, living my dream.”

“Don’t say it like you could have made any other choice, Jake.”

“I don’t regret it,” he answered right back. “Yet if I had to do it all over again, there are a lot of things about you that I would do a whole lot differently.”

Y/N nodded slowly, her heart rate slightly going up. If they often shared I-love-you’s more out of habits than anything else - though they were always genuine, Jake had never really expressed out loud how he felt about her, and from the electricity in the air - totally different from the explosive tension that had built up until now, she could feel there were more to it.

“It’s never too late, they say,” he smiled softly, his hand making it to the back of her neck.

Y/N hold her breath, searching in his eyes if he was being serious and if he was really wanting to finish the conversation they had started the night of their senior prom. If he wanted to do it right here, right now in a parking lot. It was a conversation that could have totally changed their life if they had it. A conversation for which they every so often imagined what they would have said if fear hadn’t stopped them.

If there were much younger back then, nothing now had changed at all.

“I’ve always been yours,” Y/N whispered. It would be lying if relief hadn’t wash over Jake. Of course he had known - he had always known - yet, hearing it was another thing.

“I know.”

Y/N’s bright eyes saw his eyes dove down to her lips, only a dozen of centimetres away she realized now, then back to her eyes. Her cheeks were burning up from the anticipation of what was to come. Yet, lost in each other’s eyes, none of them moved.

At that moment, the world could have stopped that they wouldn’t have noticed. Nothing else but them mattered.

“Well, kiss me then.”

578 notes · View notes

starmocha · 10 days ago

Text

CONGRATUDOLENCES..... to me????? 😭😭😭😭

So, my past week has been very shitty due to some personal life events, which has left me in a terrible headspace involving a lot of stewing in anger, disassociating, and spiraling. No jokes, I arrived home from work yesterday, and as I was opening some packages, I was already in the midst of having a meltdown as I was ranting to a family member when I gotten to this huge box, and the moment I realized what it was, I stopped midsentence and went, "omg??? 🥺🥺🥺🥺"

There was no announcement that this was shipped out. It arrived inside a basic cardboard box with nothing to associate it with the game or Infold. It literally felt like a surprise gift 😭 and it arrived at the perfect time because yesterday was the first time in a week I felt happy again—even if it lasted briefly (will not elaborate <3).

CLARIFYING SOME THINGS BEFORE I SHOW THE GOODIES:

I'm sorry, but I do not know the minimum spending needed to be eligible for the VIP perks. According to speculations from Reddit posts and Twitter threads, the estimated range is $2k-6k, but keep in mind that this is merely just a guess based on the Chinese VIP tiers. Additionally, I do not know when the spending is calculated, so I cannot even give a guess myself. I've been playing since a week after the game launch, so over a year, but I was not eligible for the first time this was released to global players. I was only offered this invitation back in March or April, and it happened out of the blue.

I literally have no idea about anything with the VIP perks. The only communication I've received was an explanation that I would be prioritized with customer service, but tbh, my introverted ass would never test this out 😔

OKAY PIC SPAM TIME 💖

There is a switch underneath the top cover, but the battery pack is screwed in, and I currently do not have a screwdriver small enough for it 😭 One of my friends said it is supposed to light up, so I will share that once I am able to put in batteries for it 🙂

The first layer is kitty badges! Second layer has the letters and acrylic blocks. The third layer is the plushies.

Zayne, Sylus, and Rafayel need to all pay for my eye exams for the rest of my life because what the fuck are these chicken scratches they made me try to decipher 🥹🥹🥹

The sun bathes the world outside. Puffball walked in and left footprints on the paper... I was writing on the cleanest one. I hope you don't mind. I bought it a while back and found myself wondering if I should write. "I miss you" or "Can we meet" is boring. If I wrote them, it wouldn't be any different... My pen favors "I miss you." I often think about you. I recall everything that's ever been our pleasant moments. I walked a lonely path before we met. Trepidation and distraction weren't bothersome. But now, I hope the path I chase is intertwined with yours forevermore.

Xavier

One person changed my life: you. I'd like to hear from you the moment I wake up. Eating together makes the food taste better. When I'm painting, bathing or sleeping, part of my mind is yours. Otherwise, I'll be preoccupied with countless things about you. It's like you cast a spell, intertwining my life with yours and creating indescribable hues that burn bright. If I need a reason for sending a letter, I guess it's to express my gratitude. You entered my world and brought unique colors. But can't I just write to you because I want to?

Rafayel

I rarely use "maybe." Maybe implies "something unexpected," which I should avoid at work. But as I think about us, maybe our encounter is "something unexpected but brilliant." Weather, circumstances, and two souls' emotions affect the result. Those destined to walk life's path together meet time after time. Their journey's trajectory could've gone awry. We were fortunate. It's the first time I wish to express my gratitude for "maybe," something unexpected, and you. Thank you for making these choices before we met. They resulted in our destined encounter. Within that miracle, that second, perfection unfolded beyond my imagination. That moment your gaze met mine.

Zayne

What's with that look on your face? Shocked? Or surprised? Too bad I can only imagine it.

This letter doesn't have any interlayers or secrets. I just wanted to surprise you. For me, our meeting was a boring game's accident. Yes it's the ONLY one in my life. Your presence has broken a lot of my previous beliefs. Only recently do I see the changes. Now I have a helmet for you, a reason to leave the N109 Zone, and this letter. How did I fall for this trap? It's because you're you. All the other answers are meaningless. I refuse to call it fate. Fate can be defied. But with you, I can look forward to the future.

Sylus

#x — personal ⋆★#it is so romantic how they wrecked my eyesight reading their sweet and thoughtful letters 🥹🥹🥹#my eyes are so sore right now 🥹

65 notes · View notes

chongoblog · 2 months ago

Note

just wanted to say i really like and appreciate the mashups you’ve put out recently and sharing some of the meaning behind them because it’s honestly made me really appreciate and have a new perspective on mashups as a whole. like i’d always liked and respected mashups as a form of music but my view on them was a lot more… lighthearted i guess? like i never really considered the intention behind the songs chosen besides when there were obvious connections, and i never really thought of them as something that could be used for self expression until recently. its very cool how you’re able to take all these bits of songs and recontextualize them into an entirely new meaning, like a collage in audio form. idk i guess just thanks for making art so good it made me gain new appreciation for the medium as a whole :]

Literally? This message means everything to me. This has been The Goal for years.

Honestly, I felt the same way you did when I was first starting out. Mashups do feel a lot more lighthearted, since a lot of the novelty of mashups comes from "now hold on just a second...this is a song that I recognize...but the lyrics are from a different song??? That's so crazy!!!". But as I've honed my skills further and further, I've found that you CAN tell stories and express yourself through this medium.

I know for a long time I've found new ways to make mashups fun and interesting, but I think 2021 marked the point where I realized this medium can be used to do so much more. Specifically with Windows 7 Startup (Slowed Down). I've given a speech about this one multiple times in the past, but in case you did not know or could not tell, this mashup is essentially about being caught in the cycle of addiction and self-loathing. It was vent art, but in the form of a mashup, which is something that fascinated me. It's been one of my favorite mashups I've ever made for that reason (enough that I had to make sure it was included in Polka For Another Purgatory), even if it was made when I was in a terrible place.

All that to say, thank you so much for this! I personally really like the term "audio collage".

136 notes · View notes

blooming-cecilia · 2 months ago

Text

i don't know dahlia all that well yet since i've yet to play the interlude (i'm waiting for miss erika's lines to be patched in 🙂‍↕️🤞)

buuut based on the vibes i've been getting...

in the context of lunasmr's wedding audio, i feel like if dahlia ever found out his bestie venti here got married WITHOUT any officiant or witness? he would set off and FORCE him to get a proper ceremony at the church lmfao 😭

i can see it happening post honeymoon audio, once windblume and venti get back to their normal lives

venti's at the tavern as usual but still kinda riding the wedding bliss. while on break from his Very Exhausting job of entertaining the masses, he's chosen to sit with a bunch of his tavern buddies and dahlia. everyone at that point has noted how extra happy the bard is that night, and venti accidentally says the truth without realizing it's consequences, happily yapping about his marriage and honeymoon bc hehe hes very in love so why wouldnt he yap about getting married to his beloved <33

and everyone's just ?!?! but dahlia. ohhh dahlia. he's appalled and after a few moments of silence just sets off on venti. what do you MEAN you got married. with no officiant? no other witnesses?? just both of you??? your marriage isn't OFFICIAL YOU FOOL

venti realizes his mistake and tries to get him off his back but nope! dahlia's not having any of that! he WILL have a proper ceremony This wednesday (aka, the Latest gap in his schedule) and NO he cannot get out of this.

doesn't matter if he knows venti's barbatos or not, dahlia feels like someone who would tell off someone even if they're above him in whatever rank. as long as there's something wrong, he WILL correct it. so there really is no other option but to comply 🤡

sooooo venti has no choice but to tell his beloved windblume that uhhh Well. that second wedding he promised them they'd have if they wanted?? Guess It's Happening Now

and even then it's like, the barest minimum wedding with the deacon and two other witnesses (one from each side)

(unless his windblume wanted to invite more folks of course!)

all because he's annoyed about having to been told to do another wedding just because he was told it wasn't leGaLLy biNdinG 🙄😒

grumbles about it to his windblume as they both get ready that fateful wednesday morning,

"i'm literally god. i should be allowed to legalize my own marriage. why does the church have to approve of MY MARRIAGE. shouldn't have said it with dahlia around, i knew he was gonna nag ..."

"to be fair, he's got a point. i did try to tell you."

"NOT YOU TOO >:("

windblume kisses his cheek and tries to soothe their (soon to be?) husband, barely holding back a laugh.

"well, aren't you glad to be able to marry me again? you were the one excited about having a bunch of weddings!"

the pout from venti's face falls into a small smile.

"that's about the only good thing from this whole nonsense, anyway."

he leans over to kiss his beloved,

"you know i'd marry you every day if i could, my love."

bonus: the best man

let me preface this by saying that because it's mondstadt and because i say so, i believe any person can be elected as a primary attendant/witness regardless of gender. so, i think venti could (and would) have chosen literally anyone available (lol) for his side

but i think it would be funny if he chose diluc as his best man

i was mostly thinking of this in the context of my yumeship, but also? he would probably be chosen because he:

1) knows who venti is so he likely understands the full context of this out of the blue wedding

2) he can roll with the punches and adapt fairly easily

3) venti has a sense of humor

i'm imagining him just dropping by the winery and asking like, "heyyy master diluc, r u free this wednesday? yeah?? ok can u come for a little thing i got going on at the church, promise it won't take up too much of your time <3 k thx see u!!!"

just making it sound super casual like he's asking to hang out. which was super sus already especially with that location. but he got no other clue on why, so he just gets there and BOOM. it was. a weddign . and he's. venti's best man?????????

was So confused getting there early and seeing an unimpressed dahlia waiting. he thinks he got it wrong and was gonna apologize but THEN dahlia goes,

"are you one of his witnesses"

".. what?"

"the bard and [windblume]'s wedding. are you their witness"

(realization)

"...............yes"

and he just sits there waiting along with windblume's chosen witness while inwardly groaning and cursing out venti in his head

not because he had to play best man. he wouldn't have minded. but he would have preferred to have been told he was attending a wedding!! he should have been in a nice proper suit rn!!

he doesn't even have a gift for the couple! though he supposed that can always come later, it still feels wrong to be THIS unprepared and it's on what he thought was gonna be a Perfectly Normal Wednesday Afternoon

somebody save him

#tulip brainrots #lunasmr #venti x reader #i guess it deserves that tag #dahlia genshin #diluc ragnvindr #silly brainrot time #srs tho we've never gotten to tackle the aftermath of that audio LMFAO #like mond's favorite bard got married??? on a monday??? and nobody knew???#and luna's venti is saur in love you KNOW he yapped about it to anyone who would listen as soon as they got back #it really was only a matter of time before it reached the ears of the church. ofc someone in there would do something #mondstadters have all the time in the world to gossip anyway #anyway im just living for the apparent bestie vibes these two got going on and with that personality i just know dahlia's a lotta fun #esp with venti. but because theyre besties + know each other well they r also each other's worst enemies. simply bc they know each other /j #its done out of love tho!!! but damn that is kind of annoying and mindly insulting to venti #i would be insulted too if i was told my love alone isnt legally binding 😔✊#anyway i love making diluc an unfortunate victim to venti's shenanigans #chose him bc hes close to my sona but it's also just funny to mess with him like this #plus he's honored and would have accepted it anyway but goddamn tell a man so he can dress up and be pretty #and get u a nice gift #that's his main concern tbh bc hes got no business telling the couple how to do their wedding #i wanna support yall as best man but u gotta let me in on the plans first smh #feel free to imagine windblume's best person/person of honor and the shenanigans of explaining this situation #id love to hear takes on other witnesses lol #ALSO while they never explicitly invite anyone else i feel like after venti yaps about it at the tavern #they actually do get some guests! mostly those curious enough to see if it actually happens lol. but also to see their fave bard get married #so that church would be full of people after all so yayyy happy end #but also this annoys diluc further bc hes there in his everyday clothing and everyone else is at least wearing their sunday's best LMFAOOOO

62 notes · View notes

klysanderelias · 2 months ago

Text

I realized I haven't talked about it yet, but I finished my second game of Eureka, doing The Rot of Osborne Estate! It ended up taking about 4 sessions, 15-16 hours in total, and it was such a good experience.

No spoilers for the module, but I had a really great time running it! I specifically tried to avoid doing any prep or rewriting for the module, and while that definitely made me feel underprepared coming into each session, I think it really shows the strength of the Eureka philosophy. The modules are meant to allow narrators to avoid having to make most decisions on the fly, and to give enough framework to be able to run it 'out of the box' so to speak.

And I think it really worked - I've always treated DnD/Pathfinder adventure modules as things that inherently need to be rewritten, as a skeleton or toolbox for me to build a specific instance out of. It's always been a process of stripping a pre-written adventure down for parts and spending hours turning it into something serviceable, and this was the first time I haven't done that and came away feeling really happy about the game I ran.

Partially that's because the system is set up to organically produce plot beats based off of character choices, but also because modules are written AS a toolbox instead of a railroad-y series of setpieces for players to be led through. I don't have to figure out what happens if x instead of y, or what to do if neither my players nor I want to do z, because none of that is written into the resource.

I've been complaining about the writing of starfinder adventure paths for a minute but I'll do it again here - the most recent one I played was so egregious as to literally say to the GM 'regardless of what the players do, this result has to occur' as well as having fights that were like 'if the players kill the monster too fast, just adjust the HP as necessary to get the right feel for the encounter' which as a player, had me tearing my hair out in frustration.

And Eureka has the robust mechanics to let you say 'look if the investigators don't find everything in this room, that's fine' and let them bounce around from location to location, NPC to NPC, and piece things together at their own pace.

And I was really happy with how things played out - my players never felt stymied or lost, always having some other lead to pursue or some goal directly in front of them, and I never felt pressure to put out the carrot on the stick or otherwise massage things to move the game along.

The investigators ended up in a couple of really climactic moments that killed one of them near the end of the module, and I'm so excited to hear from other groups how their games go because there are so many ways to get from point a to point z, but also because each group of investigators might radically change the plot of the adventure.

Overall I'm really proud of my players, especially since it was their first time with the Eureka system, but also of the module writer, CoffeeWolf. I think they really knocked it out of the park and wrote a wonderful module. Unfortunately having run it I'm not able to play in it (since of course there is a core mystery with a correct answer that I know), but I'm looking forward to getting to run it again for other players.

I'm definitely looking forward to running more Eureka games because it's such a fucking relief from a lot of the systems I've been playing in for the last, like, decade. Not only do the players have agency, but as a GM I'm super fucking excited to run every module because I have no idea how things will turn out! Usually, it's reading through the book and seeing all the setpieces methodically planned out, and at best that means you get to go 'oh wow the players are going to think that this story is so cool', and not 'there is a world of possibility open to them and I'm so excited to see what they choose to do first'. Even for adventures I've already run, there's a lot of replay value because different players will run different investigators who will do different things, and I've already heard stories about other games that went radically different from mine even though it's still the same module.

There's a lot of systems and design philosophy like PbtA that say 'figure the story out as you go' and I think that gets you to the point of 'wow I can't wait to see what the players choose to do next' but you never get that hanging payoff that you can see getting closer every session, y'know? Like, watching people figure out a mystery is such a fucking joy, and maybe it's just the caliber of players who are in the Eureka servers but I've been so blown away by how friendly and skilled all of them are.

I cannot recommend enough the @anim-ttrpgs book club or patreon servers, they're both full of wonderful people and I've been having such a great time playing games but also just hanging out and making friends.

#eureka #eureka investigative urban fantasy #long post #eureka ttrpg

81 notes · View notes

delewlew · 1 year ago

Text

i'll kick your ass, verstappen: max verstappen x black fem! reader

request: HEYYYYYYY could you do a max x fem reader when he gets jealous really bad over one of your male friends please. Love your stories keep going 🤍🤍

warnings: jealousy, slight swearing, google translated dutch

author's note: i hope you like this, i lowkey fried my brain trying to make sure i was confident enough to post this...still trying to convince myself. also the title isn't as cute cuz my gradient thingie wasn't working so it'll be plain...sorry bout that. as always, reblogs and comments are always appreciated as well <3

you were in second grade when you met your best friend, nikolaas, after he moved to your school. you were assigned to be his class buddy to help him get comfortable at the new school. the two of you attended the same school all the up to university so you weren't ever really apart from one another. the two of you learned to swim and ride bikes together as little kids. he was there when you went on your first date with the cute guy in your calculus class at the ice rink near your home, and he was there to take you to the hospital when you broke your ankle right after. you were there to help him learn to slow dance before he went to his first formal dance with a girl that wasn't you. he was there to teach you how to walk in that pair of So Kate's you bought without realizing maybe there was a reason nobody but zendaya dared to wear those godforsaken heels. you were there to coach him through confessing his feelings to his first boyfriend. the two of you had experienced so much of your lives beside one another that your relationship wasn't shaken when it was time to move away from home. years passed and he was a professional model travelling the world while you were working as an architect, living in monaco.

since living in monaco you'd been promoted, moved to a nicer apartment, completed a huge project with your team, and met your boyfriend. you met max at an event you'd been invited to courtesy of your own personal connections. from the moment he laid eyes on you, he knew you there was something different about you from other women he's met in the past. that night, you both exchanged numbers and he'd convinced you to go on a date with him shortly after.

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

for the first time since you'd moved to monaco, your best friend had finally been able to take time to come visit you. he'd flown in two days ago and was staying at your apartment for a bit longer before flying out to korea for some event he was invited to. you sat on your bed and he sat across from you painting a fresh coat of nail polish over his nails since the ocean water chipped it off earlier today. his hand shook slightly as he painted his fingers and your voice cut through the silence, "nikko i swear to god if you get black nail polish on my bed i'll kill you." he looked up through his long, thick, black eyelashes and muttered, "je bent letterlijk de meest dramatische persoon die ik ooit heb ontmoet." you rolled your eyes and huffed, "whatever you love me and you know it." he cracked a smile through the focused glare he held while looking at his fingers, "yeah yeah...speaking of love, how's your man?" [you're literally the most dramatic person i've ever met]

you smiled at the thought of max and answered, "he's really good. the season has treated him well for the most part and he's happy with how things are. we're going back home for his next race so i'm excited i'll be able to see both of our families, and i'm gonna try to stop by your place to see your mom if she's there." he shook his head while keeping his eyes on his nails, "m'ma is in suriname until september because she's visiting granm'ma and granp'pa." your frowned and asked, "were you supposed to go home with her?" nikko nodded and shrugged, "it's alright though, i think i'll be able to make it down there for christmas so it's fine. plus you can see her in september when she comes back." a smile tugged on his lips and he continued, "that is if you want to come see me walk at new york, paris, milan, or london fashion week this year." you nearly tackled him into a hug and screeched, "NO FUCKING WAY- NIKKO?! YOU BOOKED ALL FOUR?!" he laughed and wrapped his arm around you in a hug, "yup i'm booked and busy this year!"

you immediately promised, "i'm going to be at every single show." your best friend nodded, "already reserved your tickets for everything." there was a beat of silence before he asked, "wait isn't max still racing in september- i don't want to make you miss those especially because you missed miami for the met gala with me." this was true, you'd flown to new york city to be nikko's plus one for the met gala but max told you he didn't mind and was happy you were going. without a second thought, only thinking of how exciting this was for your best friend, you waved off his worry, "it'll be fine. besides max likes you."

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

"i don't fucking like this guy." max huffed as he scrolled though his instagram because you posted something. he looked at his screen and clenched his jaw seeing the post you'd made with your best friend.

therealyn

liked by nikko, maxverstappen1, and 643,943 others

therealyn baby's first time in monaco <3

read all 5,423 comments

nikko i wish i could stay longer :(

⤷ therealyn don't forget me when ur famous

sza cuties

⤷ therealyn omg i love you

username1 why is he so close?

⤷ username2 they've been friends since they were 7 and nikko moved to the netherlands from suriname. y/n was his first friend and they've grown up together. don't try to start something out of nothing.

⤷ username3 GET EM SIS

⤷ username4 ngl i kinda see what username1 means...if you look back at some other posts they've made with each other they're way closer than i'd consider to be best friends. i mean i personally wouldn't be that close with my guy bsf knowing i have a man.

⤷ username4 that man is a walking pride flag be so fr rn

⤷ username1 im just saying he's a little close to her. plus she's already missed a race so she can go see him, and i guarantee you she'll do the same again when fashion week comes around.

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

reading the comments didn't ease max's mind whatsoever but he did catch a few that did make him realize that maybe you were just being a supportive best friend. he'd had friends go to things to support him in the past and he's done the same for them so why does he feel so...weird when you do the same? he'd managed brush off the feelings he had until he checked your story and clicked on the post you'd shared:

nikko

liked by therealyn, gucci, and 1,235,099 others

nikko but none of them will ever love you the way i do it's me and you

view all 10,302 comments

therealyn and as the years go by our friendship will never die

kendalljenner beauties

username6 ...why is he holding her like that.

⤷ username7 i think they're together? i always saw their posts together and assumed

⤷ username8 NO THEY'RE NOT TOGETHER THEY'RE BEST FRIENDS PLS DON'T START RUMORS SHE IS DATING MAX VERSTAPPEN

username9 this look a little....

username10 yall are so weird. literally every interaction nikko has with a girl looks like this, look it up and you'll see he's holding everyone's hand, wrapping their arms around them. it's just how he is pipe down.

username11 THE CAPTION? NIKOLAAS UR BOLD FOR THAT ONE

username12 ngl i kinda wanna see them as a couple

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

max fought to control his facial expressions when you called him excited to tell him about going to support nikko at the big 4 fashion weeks. he watched as your eyes sparkled, "he's already reserved the seat in my name at all of his shows too! this is so great he's always wanted to walk in these shows and now he's got the chance. i want september to already be here." max frowned at the mention of the month, "schat- i'm still racing in september though?" you explained, "well yeah it's just singapore and azerbaijan that i'll have to miss but i'll be at the rest." max bit the inside of his cheek, "didn't you already see him walk in new york back in may? you missed miami for it remember?" you smiled, "babe that was the met gala, that was different. this is actual fashion shows not a red carpet."

when max was still silent you asked, "why don't you seem happy doe nikko?" he took a small exhale to not raise his voice or seem too annoyed, "it's good for the guy i mean this is a big deal as a model. i just...sometimes i think he's just a little too close?" you frowned and you asked, "what do you mean? you've never had a problem with him before?" max sighed and admitted, "i'm just saying there's no reason why other people should be questioning our relationship status when you're with other people. why is he holding you like i hold you?" you couldn't even find the right words for a moment, "i- i- he....max you've seen the way he acts around everyone. he's a touchy guy and he always has been. why are you now bothered that he holds me? it's nothing new."

max let out another annoyed huff and snapped, "just tell him to watch himself." you couldn't even say anything before he hung up the phone on you and left you stunned to a silence. just then your phone pinged and it was another instagram notification:

nikko just posted a story!

there wasn't even a point in trying to ask nikolaas to delete the story because he was on a flight to korea right now which means he just posted it before the plane took off. so all you had to do was hope maybe max wouldn't see it because although you had no issue with the photo, you knew right now your boyfriend would.

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

the instagram story made it's way to his eyes in less than 5 minutes after it was posted. so, max didn't hesitate to open his own photo gallery and select a few pictures before posting them himself, he pasted a caption from the ones you'd saved in his notes and posted it before turning off his phone.

maxverstappen1

liked by charles_leclerc, f1wags, and 649,779 others

maxverstappen1 mijn

view all 3,402 comments

therealyn answer your phone

username13 HE'S MAD HE SEEN THE POSTS

username14 max....

charles_leclerc mate, you posted on your main

⤷ maxverstappen1 i know.

⤷ charlesleclerc oh!

oscarpiastri i feel like i wasn't supposed to see some of these

⤷alex_albon i don't think any of us were...

⤷ therealyn you werent.

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

hot tears stung the corners of your eyes as you stared at your phone knowing full well why max posted the photos he did. you knew that he got jealous every now and again but he'd never done anything like this, especially when it came to nikolaas because he knew how close he was to you. max wasn't answering your phone calls or text messages so you had no way to actually call him.

meanwhile max was in his apartment on his sim when he heard a knock at his door. when he opened it he saw lando standing on his doorstep before he pushed his way into his apartment. max asked, "why are you in my apartment?" lando shook his head and countered, "why are you posting shit like this online?" a smug grin tugged at max's lips and he answered, "you know why."

lando sat on max's couch and responded, "i don't know why. what i do know is your girlfriend called me crying asking me why you weren't answering her calls." max huffed, "she's busy playing with that guy." lando ran a hand through his curls, "you're jealous of her best fucking friend? are you being serious right now?" max rolled his eyes and lando continued, "the guy wears nail polish and face glitter and you think something is going on between them?" when there was silence lando continued, "mate he literally flirted with charles and asked for his number when he came to zandvoort last year. then told alex that she had good taste because he wanted to quote 'drink him up and sop up the rest with a biscuit. and you think there's any way that something is happening with y/n? you can be jealous but if your girlfriend says there's no reason to worry then you should trust her. you need to fix this before something actually happens that can't be fixed." lando slapped max on the shoulder before walking out the door and heading back to his apartment.

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

it was nearly 3 am when max unlocked the front door to your apartment and slipped in quietly, kicking off his shoes and leaving them by your front door. he pulled back the door and grabbed one of his t shirts and took off his pants before climbing in your bed. he pulled you closer to him and wrapped his arm around your torso. when you moved his arm off of you he knew you were awake so he mumbled, "schat..." you answered plainly, "wat wil je, max?" your boyfriend pressed a kiss to your shoulder and responded, "i'm sorry. i was wrong and i was immature and posting those pictures knowing you had them in our private folder was wrong." there was a momentary silence before you asked, "waarom heb je het dan gedaan?" he let out a deep sigh as he admitted, "i was jealous and only thinking about myself in the moment instead of thinking about how my actions would affect you as well. i never want to hurt you or be the reason for your pain, but i was so i'm sorry." [what do you want, max? // then, why did you do it?]

you felt his hand run over your arm gently as you asked, "wat ga je doen om het te repareren?" max answered, "well i deleted the post first and came here to apologize second. also i'd love to see you go to london, paris, new york, and milan to support nikko in september. i'll be waiting at home for you the minute you get back." you turned to face him and opened your eyes, finding his gaze in the darkness. bringing your hand to his cheek you asked, "i never want you to think that anyone stands a chance at competing with you for my heart, maxie. you are my person and i only love you this way, i only want to be with you. there's only you in my heart and i need you to trust me when i say that, okay?" max leaned into your touch and nodded, before you pressed a gentle kiss to his lips, "i love you." he pulled you to his chest and tangled his legs with yours as he replied, "ik houd ook van jou." you nuzzled closer to him and brought a hand to his chest, tracing small patterns over his heart. both of you began to drift off to sleep, your voice cut through the silence, "but do that shit again and i'm kicking your ass, verstappen." max let out a small chuckle and admitted, "i don't doubt that, but you don't have to worry about it happening again." [what are you going to do to fix it?//i love you too.]

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

the end.

238 notes · View notes

genderqueerdykes · 7 months ago

Note

the post you just shared about being both a trans man and a dyke reminded me of something that ive been wanting to talk about for a while now but haven't been able to so far.

im brazilian. the country with one of the biggest pride parades in the world while also being in the highest rates of violence towards lgbt people. queer culture here is weird, and maybe i missed out on it because i was able to find refuge online among the english speaking community relatively early.

ive been observing something that i wrongly assumed was our own version of the butch/femme community, and for a second i got really excited bc we all know butch loneliness, but the more i started looking into it, the more of its completely rotten entrails they showed me.

it's a disfigurement of the ideas that i have held to my heart so dearly ever since i read stone butch blues for the first time, and even more as i discovered leslie feinberg, and found out that there really were others like me. they use the term "desfem" (as in "defeminized"), and the definition explicitly states that the individual must be a cis woman, quoting some terf-tier bullshit that would make joanne proud.

hating men is their entire personality, and it's so shallow and based on cishet gender roles that there is no "femme" counterpart, because they see no way to perform femininity outside of patriarchal roles. they want the aesthetics of butchness without the hardships of living as one. the trans community carries these people on their backs and still they're more worried about how some dykes are trans too.

i don't know where im going with this, i just need to get it off my chest to someone who would at least have an idea of what im talking about. it's so disheartening to see the community head towards this direction, and i grow less and less interested in forming bridges with cis people as time goes on lol

i wanted to thank you for taking the time to send it, i really appreciate these thoughts! i get contacted by a lot of brazilian people. i think that's super cool! i've heard that despite how large your queer scene is that it's still very queerphobic and that's unfortunate, but it does happen.

"hating men is their entire personality, and it's so shallow and based on cishet gender roles that there is no "femme" counterpart, because they see no way to perform femininity outside of patriarchal roles."

i really appreciate the way you said this! i've been trying to point this out for a while now and i'm glad you've come to this realization, yourself.

for whatever reason, cis lesbian, dyke and sapphic spaces are obsessed with the butch-femme binary. it's romanced to hell and back but it's very restrictive and patriarchal. implying that romantic relationships must fall into a masculine partner + feminine partner structure is cisheteromative. there's not much representation for butch4butch, butch4all, femme4femme and femme4all people. the idea that the masculine partner must be strong and protect the weak feminine partner that can't defend themselves is a patriarchal dynamic.

all of the lesbian yearning posts are about how butches are tops and doms and how all femmes are bottoms and subs. butch becomes synonymous with penis and femme becomes synonymous with vagina. calling butches 'chivalrous knights' dehumanizes them and reduces them to being protector figures. the way cis femmes online go on and on and on about how they "need" a butch is very alarming. femmes are being framed as dependent and as though they can't function unless they have a butch in their life, which is very misogynistic.

it's just a repeat of cishet- the patriarchal relationship formatting applies here, even if the genders are slightly tweaked. it's in the coding. it's literally a copy and paste job. it's lazy and toxic as hell and it leaves out all of the diversity that comes with lesbianism and how butches and femmes can experience life and love and sexuality in a variety of ways.

the thing is, as a genderqueer person, i've never understood why people are so attached to this binary. it's so restrictive. i'm butch, but not in the way that white cis lesbians define it. the way they tlel you how to be butch is so restrictive it's not even funny. it's like you gotta pass a test. you gotta be stereotypically masculine 100% of the time or else you're not a real butch. you're expected to emulate a cishet guy, but if you identify as a guy, all hell breaks loose. if you think about it people basically force butches to identify as men and then hold it at arm's reach away. like you have to act exactly like a man but be a Woman. and it makes no fucking sense.

lesbians are some of the most gender diverse people out there. it's crazy to me that people are trying to force lesbians, people who are known for being gender weird, into a male-female cishet binary but with a lesbian Womyn coat of paint. i wish you better luck in finding community that wants to stick together instead of fight over petty bullshit that doesn't matter. take care of yourself. feel free to stop by again any time

#asks #answers

118 notes · View notes

transmascaraa · 1 year ago

Note

Hi!! I saw that requests are open 😈😈😈

may I humbly request Ga ming, Bennett, Tighnari, Cyno, Freminet and Scaramouche with a reader who uses gen alpha slang like Gyatt, skibidi, rizz, ect?

Like they the most serious person ever but says stuff like "oh my gyatt 😧 (in a sophisticated accent ofc)" "that wasn't very skibidi rizz of you..." AND THEY ARE DEAD SERIOUS (bonus points if they're like royalty or something)

IVE BEEN OBSESSED WITH SAYING "oh my gyatt" AND IM NOT EVEN GEN ALPHA 💀💀

-with many love and thy prayers,

🍓 anon

multiple characters headcannons!

gen alpha typa humor

characters: gaming, bennett, tighnari, cyno, freminet, wanderer x gn!reader

author's note: i say some phrases ironically too💔💔 but it's not THAT SERIOUS bro i fear MOST of gen alpha it's not funny anymore😔 have fun reading cuz i died 27 times writing this

✿ Gaming

-taking into hc that he's gen z btw

-he knows exactly how horrifying the words and phrases are BUT

-after he heard you saying:

-"shush gaming i'm gonna ruin my mewing streak!"

-he looked at you dumbfounded for the first few seconds as if you told him some gibberish

-but after he realized what you said he kinda just started hysterically laughing

-probably would start tickling you afterwards and if you just don't let him, he'll tell you:

-"okay fine gigachad, i won't interrupt" barely being able to pronounce a word due to him laughing like that

-yeah it's just him laughing at you a lot in the relationship lmfao

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

♡ Bennett

-definetly doesn't understand a thing at first

-like the first few months, he just awkwardly laughs when you say something like that

-hoping that you won't question him

-but in the end, he asks YOU to tell him wtf is any of that

-first, he asked you what does "gyatt" mean.

-and you told him:

-"ass." with the most dead serious eyes ever possible.

-and he just looks confused

-until he gets to learn even more of the words/slangs and kinda

-just becomes like you unfortunately

-now you both use gen alpha slang sadly and people give you weird looks

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

⑅ Tighnari

-aeugh

-he feels as if he has 2 cynos in his life since cyno uses it too

-dies inside whenever you say some slang/word

-dies even more when in public

-like he was literally so embarrassed once when you screamed:

-"I LOVE ALPHA MALES!!!" in public from where he just dragged you away and was embarrassed for the rest of his life

-he literally has trauma from some situations(that was one of them)

-he loves you, he js thinks you're weird.

-VERY weird.

-ABSOLUTELY WEIRD.

-it's the worst when he's hanging out both with you and cyno at the same time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

๑ Cyno

-he uses it too.

-i've already mentioned it in tighnari's part but you cannot change my mind.

-so you use it together.

-you piss people off together.

-(preferably tighnari, along with alhaitham and kaveh, and also any of the other women/girls from sumeru)

-basically partners in crime.

-like you were at some restaurant with him and tighnari, whereas you're showing them the people you've met in fontaine.

-you show them a picture of wriothesley and immediately look at cyno dead serious.

-"this is wriothesley, he has the gyatt that arataki itto from inazuma doesn't. literally level 3 gyatt. it is crazy how a man-" that's when tighnari tiredly said he's going to the bathroom.

-too bad.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

✷ Freminet

-embarrassed literally 24/7.

-if in public, 25/8.

-he understands everything you say and all but no way in hell that he will be okay with it especially when other people are around.

-he actually tried confronting you about it but like you just replied with:

-"but i won't be the rizzlord if i don't do that, y'know?"

-he just sighs hopelessly.

-unfortunately he cannot change you in any way, shape, or form

-take it easy on him like bro don't embarrass him too much lmfao

-he even tried telling 'father' but she had no clue what the words meant in the first place

-so he kinda js gave up there

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

✧ Wanderer

-he hates it. like he absolutely DESPISES it.

-it doesn't even have to be in public, he's leaving the conversation the second you say something gen alpha

-"you see and that guy was so fucking annoying, yeah?"

-"mhm." he replies.

-"exactly, that wasn't a really skibidi nor sigma male thing to do, especially including his jawline, does he ever even mew-"

-he just continued walking and you had to literally CHASE him to make him continue walking with you. you're gonna be the death of him smh

-and it was fine for a while until you saw something and just screaming:

-"OH MY GYATT-"

-he then left for sure and you found him just when you came back home.

-probably didn't talk to you for a while after that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

uhm

yes

| 🍓anon | @mariaace <3

307 notes · View notes

changetyre · 2 years ago

Note

MORE OSCAR SMUT PLEEEEEASE. The last one slapped. maybe where he rescues you from a creep? Idk. Thanks in advance!

Please II Oscar Piastri ⓈⒽⓌ

SUMMARY: After a scary encounter you seek comfort in your savior..

WARNINGS: **18+**, creep, violence, assault. Not proofread.

A/N: I'm a little behind on requests but with Christmas coming up I've been busy with gift finding, uni, seeing friends and family, and whatnot. Also, I'm really shit with endings so...srry.

"Yes, Dad I'm on my way back I promise." You spoke to your dad on the phone as you walked back to the hotel from a Red Bull party a few blocks down.

Being the daughter of a team principal came with its perks, being able to travel for free and meeting really hot Formula 1 drivers were just some of them.

Tonight you'd been invited to a Redbull party at the Las Vegas GP where you weren't even half surprised to see a Redbull car hanging from the ceiling. You hadn't even realized how late it was only intending to be at the party for a few hours knowing the next day would be busy.

Your dad had asked you to text him when you were on your way back and thinking you'd forgotten your dad had gone to sleep only to receive a text nearing 3 am where he decided to call and scold you...as usual.

"Dad calm down, there's literally people everywhere it's not like I'm completely alone, and besides I'm here in the lobby already." You rolled your eyes at your dad's dramatism.

"I expect you to be up and early tomorrow." Your dad simply said before hanging up.

You laughed as you walked to the elevator. The doors were about to close when a hand stopped them from shutting completely and they opened again.

In came a man who looked completely wasted already making you stand up straighter, warning signs going off inside your head. The doors shut and the second warning sign came when he didn't press a floor button.

You made yourself small trying to not grab any attention tucking yourself into the corner hoping the man would just leave you but as soon as you saw him slowly turn to you and smirk you knew that wouldn't be the case.

"what's your name baby girl." He stumbled all the way to you trapping you in the corner. You turned your head avoiding his face, the stench of alcohol dizzying you.

"Please get away from me." You tried your hardest to sound firm.

He laughed. "c,mon we're just having fun." He let his body fall onto you, his weight trapping your hands beside you.

"GET OFF ME!" This time you screamed louder fear present in your voice.

"Just relax." The man then whispered as he put his mouth on your neck trying to plant kisses all over as you tried wriggling away with all your strength.

"HEY!" You had completely missed the fact that the elevator had stopped and apparently so had the creep since the next thing you knew he was getting thrown off you.

You breathed a sigh of relief at the fact he was finally off you and even more at seeing a familiar face.

"y/n?" Oscar realized it was you which only angered him further. "WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM!" You heard Oscar scream before landing a punch to the man's jaw.

The next few minutes were a blur, you saw a hotel maid run by to see what was going on before guards were called. Oscar demanded they arrest the man and check the security cameras in the elevator to which the hotel staff assured they would do so and more and apologized greatly to you and him for what happened.

You simply nodded and gave short answers but wanted nothing more than to simply get away from all of this already.

"Hey let's get you back to your room." Oscar placed a gentle hand on your arm. You leaned into his touch and he put his arm around your waist keeping you close as he walked you to your room.

"Thank you." Your voice was still shaky but you felt much better now that it was over.

"Oh no don't need to thank me, he should've never touched you," Oscar replied.

You arrived to your room and you opened the door, turning around on the doorway to face Oscar.

"Uhm Oscar could you-"

"I'll leave you-" Oscar spoke at the same time as you.

You both froze waiting for the other to speak but you took the opportunity. "Can you please stay with me?" You asked him.

"Are you sur-" Oscar didn't want to overstep.

"Please. Please Oz." You begged.

And that's how Oscar found himself lying beside you in the hotel bed. It was awkward, he wasn't sure what to say or do and his nerves only increased when you'd scooted closer to him laying your head on his chest.

"uhm you okay?" Oscar chose to break the silence noticing neither of you were even close to falling asleep, you drawing circles on his chest a good indicator.

"I'm better now." shivers filled Oscar's body at the change in your tone, your voice was softer but more sure now. You looked up at him and Oscar just about stopped breathing at the closeness.

You weren't sure what it was exactly but the closeness you felt with Oscar had made you feel...warm in all sorts of places and you wanted more. Propping yourself further up you pressed your lips to Oscar.

You could feel the initial shock from him before he started kissing you back, combing your hair back with his fingers as he deepened the kiss.

You let out a soft moan at the fact things were quickly getting heated but were frustrated when all of a sudden Oscar pulled away standing up and taking a step away from the bed.

"No...no this isn't okay you've just- I can't- you're vulnerable and-" Oscar stuttered, it didn't matter how much he really wanted this he couldn't take advantage of the situation like this.

"Please Oz." The way the words had such different meanings from just a few moments ago. "I want this...I really want you." You said as you kneeled on the bed facing him.

The way Oscar's dick throbbed was criminal enjoying the way you so prettily positioned yourself on the bed wearing nothing but an oversized shirt which didn't do much to hide the space between your legs and he'd be blind not to notice the way your nipples poked out.

"Fuck-" Oscar cursed himself.

"Please Oz make me feel good." Your innocent voice almost made him pass out right then and there.

Look, maybe he was a horrible person for this...but he couldn't resist.

Stepping forward Oscar pulled you towards him by placing his hand on your neck, he knew you liked it as soon as you moaned into his mouth.

He slowly pushed you back onto the bed as he got over you not breaking the kiss. With his other hand, Oscar used his thumb to play with your nipples loving the way you squirmed at his touch.

He began kissing down your neck while his other hand began caressing your bare legs inching higher and higher slowly.

"Ah, shit...ah." He smirked at the reactions he was getting from you taking the time to tease you a little as his fingers just grazed over your panties but not just yet putting any pressure.

"Oscar just touch me already...please." Oscar had never felt anything like it when you grabbed his hand and brought them closer to you.

He let you partially take control as you began using his hand to rub it against yourself for a few seconds before curling your fingers through the back of his hand and placing it inside your panties.

"Holy shit you're gonna kill me," Oscar whispered to himself as he felt the way you guided his fingers through your folds before rubbing circles on your clit.

Oscar let you do what you please with his hands as he continued kissing the rest of your body not caring the way he was leaving marks practically everywhere.

"Please fuck me." You then asked.

The way you seemed to ask for everything so nicely only made Oscar want more and more of you.

"Of course baby." He whispered as he pulled his hand out of your panties with a little reluctance from you so he could strip himself off his clothes.

He saw as you were about to take your shirt off. "Leave it on," Oscar demanded, there was something about you in an oversized shirt with the idea of being bare underneath that just made the ache between his legs a little bigger.

You smirked noticing the desperation in Oscar's voice. Once he freed himself Oscar climbed back over you before holding his dick and rubbing it through your folds a few times.

You rolled your eyes back at the anticipation just waiting for him to fill you up already and it didn't take long before your wishes were fulfilled.

Despite the fact Oscar wanted to fuck you senseless he reigned his needs in and took his time thrusting into you, letting you adjust to his size and length.

"Fuck that's so good." You muttered breathlessly. "Faster Oz please."

You begged the knot in your stomach building up with each second.

Oscar propped his elbows beside you to steady himself before he started setting a pace, loving the way you immediately wrapped your arms and legs around him trying to pull him closer.

"sh*t you're so tight." Oscar could feel the way your walls almost clawed at him every time he pulled back out. "It's like you were made just for me, right baby?" Oscar had never truly been vocal during sex but there was something about you that just made him want to talk.

"Yeah...yes." You replied breathless again having a hard time focusing on his words from the overwhelming pleasure that was building up.

"You're taking me so good." Oscar smiled as he noticed the way your moans got louder and your breath quickened.

"Oz I'm gonna cum...I'm gonna cum." You cried out.

"Cum baby." Oscar was close too but to be honest he didn't care if he didn't finish as long as you did. After a few seconds, he could feel you clenched around him before your body shivered underneath him. His pace initially quickened before gradually slowing down fucking you through your orgasm.

And even though he thought he'd need more the sight of you coming undone seemed to be enough for Oscar as he pulled out pushing your shirt a little higher as he shot his load onto your stomach.

"Fuck." Oscar groaned at the sight of you clutching your breasts as he came onto you. "Shit, that was amazing." Oscar panted as he came down from his high.

"Yeah...you made me feel so good Oz." You replied innocently once more as if you hadn't just done the filthiest thing with him.

"Any time." He smirked as he helped you clean up.

#f1 #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #smut #f1smut #f1 one shot #f1 smut #f1fic #formula 1 #changetyre #oscar piastri #oscar piastri smut #op81 smut #op81 x reader

451 notes · View notes

becauseimanicequeen · 1 year ago

Text

Up Poompat Appreciation Post

This is inspired by this post by @clairedaring which almost physically hurt me because it's so sad.

Therefore, I'm reporting for duty to gush about Up Poompat for a minute or two (or ten) because I want to and because Up is amazing and deserves all the praise I can give him.

There's just something about Up that pulls me in. I haven't previously been able to put my finger on it (I'm more of a visual person rather than a verbal one), but I think his portrayal of Ming in My Stand-In clarifies it for me the more I get to see him in it.

It's the way he portrays depth. There's something deeper, something more that goes on beneath the surface of his characters. And he does it again and again. It's most notable for me in Lovely Writer, Hoon Payon, and Step By Step, which are three very different roles.

And, on the subject of variety. This man can play a multitude of different roles and do it convincingly. It doesn't matter if it's as an introverted writer with a kind heart, an obsessive serial killer, or everything in between. He's believable in all of it. He's just that good.

To think that this loveable cutie in Lovely Writer...

Is played by the same actor as this frustrating, self-absorbed idiot in Step By Step...

Which is played by the same actor who portrays this spoiled rich brat who's always pining after what he can never have, and does so convincingly, speaks to Up's versatility.

(It took me waaaaay too long to find a gif of this particular moment, lol, but I eventually found it here.)

I personally love Up as Ming in My Stand-In (I'm not influenced by the novel, btw) because he's shown over and over again that he can portray a variety of complex characters. And the way he uses contrasts in his acting (I have no idea if there is a technical term for this because I don't know anything about professional acting), the way he has this sweet demeanor at the same time as he delivers the most poisonous line (and, sometimes you don't realize how poisonous that line was until later) is top notch. The same goes for his ability to portray a domestic life with Joe that feels genuine from Ming's side as well (which he did so well in ep 3) at the same time as we know it won't last due to Ming's jealousy (especially around Joe and Sol) and his pining for what he can't have.

Speaking of contrast, there's also the fact that Up was blessed with his angelic face, which just gives me whiplash every time his character turns out to be the complete opposite. He can literally disguise his serial killer tendencies with that angelic face and demeanor and I feel so manipulated (in a good way) when his character's true face is revealed.

And the way he uses his face to portray different emotions and shifts in emotions is amazing.

And then there's Up. As in, the person behind it all. The Up that actually lives up to his angellike face. The Up that's genuinely sweet and funny (which you can see on his YouTube channel, where he's currently posting videos with Poom but also has a lot of older ones with Kao whom he partnered up with in Lovely Writer). And the Up that sang "You are My Sunshine" in the bts of the second episode of My Stand-In. If that's not endearing as hell, I don't know what is.

This is just a fraction of all the things I love about Up (and I could spend days gushing about his chemistry with everyone he's paired up with and worked with), but since I've already spent two hours on this little post (lol), I'll save that gushing for another day.

Just know that I love Up.

#the ACTOR he is!#he eats complex characters for breakfast lunch and dinner #and let's not forget the snacks in between #I love him so much #Up Poompat #my stand in #my stand in the series #lovely writer #lovely writer the series #hoon payon #step by step #step by step the series #thai ql #thai bl #thai series #my shit

225 notes · View notes

crypticreid · 2 years ago

Text

KINKTOBER DAY TWO

October 6 -- Phone Sex

masterlist

author's note: first of all, I've been so overwhelmed with the amount of support I've received so far on my first post. Truly, it means the world to me, so thank you! 💖💖💖Also, I've started a tag list for kinktober. If you would like to be added, please reply to one of my posts or message me!

summary: after injuring yourself, you've been forced to stay home from a case and you miss Spencer more than you'd like to admit. Lucky for you, he's missing you just as much.

warnings: female reader, masturbation, guided masturbation, horny ramblings, a little bit of spencer dominance, dirty talk

word count: 2.8k

this is adut content. 18+ plus only. minors do not interact!

Your apartment was spotlessly clean. You’d spent almost the whole day organizing and scrubbing and even rearranging furniture. You hadn’t been able to sit still all day, distracted and bored at the same time.

While on the last case a few days ago, you had sprained your ankle pretty bad. At least bad enough that Hotch had basically forced you to take a few days of leave. You argued that you could work the current case from the office with Garcia, but he’d simply leveled his ‘this isn’t up for discussion’ look at you, and you shut your mouth. Reid had offered to drive you home and then spent the entire night pampering you and not even letting you lift a finger. Then he had to leave for this case, and you were alone. Which had been okay while your ankle throbbed, but now your ankle was perfectly fine, and you were dying being stuck at home.

You were restless, but nothing you did helped. And now you’re frustrated.

You bite down on your bottom lip as you try to think of literally anything else you can do to keep your mind busy. Your eyes fall onto the clock hanging on the wall, and you notice that it’s almost midnight.

There’s barely a slim chance that he’ll pick up, but you grab your cell phone anyway and call Spencer. It rings for several seconds until his automated voicemail picks up. A sigh falls from your lips.

“Hey, Spencer. It’s me. I know you’re busy. I just – I just miss you.” You sigh again and feel slightly annoyed at how pitiful you sound. But it’s true.

It’s been hard to sleep since he’s gone, both because you’ve realized you spend too much time worrying about him and because the bed feels so empty without his long limbs taking up an unfair amount of space. You miss laying on the couch with your feet tucked under his thigh as you both read in comfortable quietness. And you hate how empty your apartment feels without him here. “Anyway, stay safe. And I’ll see you when you get home. Love you.”

You hang up the phone and slump onto the couch with a groan. After a few minutes of trying to read, you give up and decide to take a shower and head to bed. You toss your cell phone onto your bed as you take off your clothes and grab a towel. In the bathroom, you turn on the shower, and as you wait for the water to warm up, you glance at the mirror.

You see your naked body, the body that Spencer spends so much time worshiping. Your hands graze up your thighs, remembering how his hands grab onto them when he holds you pressed against his mouth as his tongue brings you to orgasm after orgasm. You continue your journey upwards across your stomach where he presses kisses and murmurs how much he loves you, to your breasts where he licks and nips and takes your nipple in between his teeth.

A warmth begins to gather low in your belly, and you feel the beginning twinges of need in your core. Quickly, you blink away the images of Spencer and drop your hands to the cool counter of the sink. You take a few deep breaths as you lean against the counter.

In the shower, you can’t help it when your hands caress your skin, paying special attention to your breasts. You moan out loud alone and realize why you’ve been so restless today. There’s a slight blush coloring your cheeks at the understanding. You rush through the rest of your shower and dry off with the towel so you can throw back the comforter of your bed and settle into the freshly cleaned sheets.

You start to rub your thighs, massaging and focusing on the sensation against your skin. With your eyes closed, an image of Spencer emerges, leaning over you, touching you. No, now he’s lying next to you, he’s breathing against your neck right after he kisses below your ear, and his hands leave your thighs and travel across your stomach. Just the fingertips, almost tickling, raising the anticipation, and he smiles when you take a sharp intake of breath before he reaches your breasts. Your hands are smaller than his, so it isn’t exactly the same sense of pleasure, but it works for now.

If he was here, Spencer would be kissing your neck, so gingerly, and then he’d laugh lightly against your skin when you’d squirm impatiently. But since he isn’t here, you don’t have to tease. Release was only a few minutes away. Your fingers gather the wetness at your core and glide upward toward your clit.

Instantly, you sigh at the contact and begin leisurely circles on the sensitive bud as your imaginary Spencer looks into your eyes. He would lean down to kiss your lips, just as slowly as his fingers moved on you, his tongue teasing your lips, but never giving himself over to you fully. Not yet. You moan his name and speed up your fingers.

The pleasure rises deep within you, your hips moving in tandem with your fingers, and you apply just a little more pressure. Another sharp intake of breath, and you can tell you’re close.

Your phone rings. You freeze your motions, unaware of your surroundings for a split second, but then you force your eyes open and scramble off the bed. The ringtone is somewhere in the room, but you can’t remember where you left your phone.

The phone rings incessantly as though it’s mocking you as you feverishly search for it. When you pull the comforter off the bed harshly, a loud clang on the floor confirms the phone’s location. You grab it and answer breathlessly, “hello.”

“Why are you out of breath?” Spencer asks on the other end, a thousand or so miles away.

You press a hand to your sweaty forehead and then push sticky strands of hair off of it. “Oh, I was in the shower, and I heard the phone ringing in the bedroom.” You lie even though Spencer is a genius profiler and would most likely see right through it. But the idea of admitting to him that you were touching yourself to the thought of him made your stomach do somersaults.

There is a small pause before he replies, “I’m sorry for interrupting your shower.”

“I was done. It’s fine.” You chew on your bottom lip.

“Oh, good. I got your message.”

“I’m sorry for bothering you.” You sit on the edge of the bed.

“Don’t apologize. It was nice to hear your voice.” His words make your heart flutter. “I miss you.”

You sigh, “I miss you too,” and lie back horizontal across the bed, your feet dangling off the edge.

“I’ll be home tomorrow. We wrapped up the case about an hour ago, but there’s a bad thunderstorm, and flights were grounded.” You picture him alone in a hotel room holding his cellphone up to his ear, his long body across the bed.

“How was the case?”

“I’d rather talk about you. How was your day?”

You turn on your side so you can fiddle with the top sheet that was left askew by all of your frantic movements earlier. “Nothing exciting.”

“And how’s your ankle?”

“Perfectly fine. Not even sore.”

“I’ll see about that. Don’t think I won’t take a look at it tomorrow.”

“You’re not a medical doctor, Spencer.” You roll your eyes with a small smile playing on your lips. He laughs lightly.

There is a soft silence between the two of you for a few moments. It isn’t awkward but comforting. Almost as if he’s lying beside you and the two of you are simply resting in the presence of each other. “What were you really doing before I called?” He inquires.

You smile. He’s too smart for his own good. “Exercising,” you quip.

“The kind of exercise that requires your hand between your legs.”

“Spencer!” You gasp.

He laughs again, and you wish he was next to you because you’d kiss the laugh off his lips. “Am I wrong?”

“How did you know?”

“I’m a profiler.”

“No, really tell me,” you demand. Profiling isn’t a magic trick, and Spencer isn’t a psychic.

“I guessed.” You roll your eyes because you can see his face in your mind, the sly almost smug smile and the eyes full of amusement.

“Bullshit.”

“No, truly. I figured you missed me just as much as I missed you.” His voice lowers to almost a whisper, and it sends a shiver down your spine. “That you’ve been thinking about me just as much as I’ve been thinking about you.”

“You’ve been thinking about me?” You murmur.

“I can’t get you out of my head. It’s quite distracting, to be completely honest.”

“Me? Distracting the brilliant Dr. Reid?” You ask innocently.

“You have no idea what you do to me, do you?” His voice has taken on that husky tone that sends wet heat straight to your core.

“Tell me.” You repeat your earlier demand, your hand rubbing mindless patterns across your skin.

“I’m hard just from hearing your voice. It’s taking everything in me to not to unbuckle my pants and fuck into my hand like I’d fuck into you.”

You can’t help but bite your lip at his words because it’s rare for him to curse like that. “Do it.”

“Only if you do it too. Can you do that for me, baby? Can you touch yourself and make yourself come just from my voice.”

“Yes,” you reply breathlessly, your hand traveling lower.

He hums low and deep in the back of his throat. “You’re already doing it aren’t you, sweetheart? Couldn’t even wait for me to undo my belt. Needed it that bad, didn’t you?”

“I need it.”

You’re about to reach your aching center when he makes a quick tutting sound. “Don’t touch yourself yet.” You instantly pull your hand away. “Go get your earbuds and connect them to your phone. I want to be right in your ear, and I want both of your hands free.”

You comply quickly, putting in your earbuds and then laying back down on your bed. You set your phone beside you. “I’m ready.”

“Are you? What are you ready for?” He teases. He wants you to vocalize exactly what you want even though it makes you blush or maybe because it makes you blush. He wants it despite not being here to see it.

“To touch myself.”

“And?”

“To make myself come from just your voice.”

“Good…” he starts, but you have one more thing to add.

“And I want to hear you come too, baby.”

In the distance, you can hear the clanking of his belt as he undoes it and the shuffling of him taking off his pants. “I’ll do anything for you.” You settle into the bed, anticipation buzzing across your skin. “Are you comfortable?”

“Yes.”

“Perfect. Close your eyes and just focus on my voice and your breathing. Take a deep breath for me. And let it go, just like that. Where do you need me most, sweetheart?”

“Everywhere.” You answer instantly.

“No, baby, I know, but focus for me. Where is that ache? Where do you need me to touch you?”

You take a deep breath. “My breasts.” Your entire body is aching with want, but your breasts are desperate to be touched.

“I want so badly to touch you, I wish I was there. I want to put your breasts in my hands. Do that for me, please.” You do as he asks, kneading your breasts. “Open your mouth, baby, and take one of your fingers and get it wet. Now play with your nipple, tease it, circle it.”

You moan as you tease yourself. “Yes. I want to hear you, tell me how good it feels. Show me how much you miss me.”

“I need you, Spencer.” You groan as you lightly pinch your nipple.

“I know, I know. I need you too.” On the other end of the phone, you can hear the sounds of him touching himself, slowly. He’s teasing himself just as much as he’s teasing you. “When I get home to you, I’m going to show you just how much I need you. I’m going to make you come with my fingers. With my tongue. Over and over again. And then I’ll finally give you my cock, just when you think you’ve had enough. And I’ll make you come one more time on my cock. Is that what you want, baby?”

Your back arches off the bed, still playing with your breasts and nipples. “Yes, oh my god. I want it so bad.”

“How bad, honey? Tell me, is your pussy dripping for me? ‘Cause you need me that bad.”

Your dominant hand moves to your core, and you feel how soaked you are. “Yes. Yes. I need you. I’m so wet.”

“Touch your clit, baby. Slow, do it slow for me at first. You know, just like I would.”

Even though your eyes are already closed, you squeeze them closed tighter when you make contact with your clit. It’s practically throbbing and you exhale a sharp breath. “Oh my god, Spencer. I can’t. I need –”

“Slow, yes you can. Take a deep breath, focus on my voice.”

An uncontrolled moan escapes your throat, but you do as he says. You concentrate on his breaths over the phone, and you match yours to his. Then you match the rhythm of your hand to the sound of his as he ruts into his hand. You listen to his grunts and whimpers, both of you racing toward a needed release.

He lets out a guttural sound. “Do you feel empty? Do you need to be filled?”

“So bad, so bad.”

“I’d fill you so good if I was there.” He groans, and you hear him lose his rhythm for a second as his hips falter. “Slip one of your fingers in. But with your other hand. I need you to keep rubbing that beautiful clit.”

As you slowly push one finger into you, he continues to ramble. “I wish I was there to taste you. You taste so good, baby. I love how gorgeous you look when I’ve got my mouth on you. The way you grind your clit against my tongue because you’re so needy. So desperate to come.”

Your finger pumps faster into you, the need and pleasure climbing higher within you as you buck your hips in time with the movement of your hands. You’re breathless, but you tell Spencer, “I’m so desperate.”

“I know you are.” He groans. “Do you know how bad I need it too? Can you add another finger for me, baby? Fill yourself even more.” You clench against your two fingers. He’s panting into the phone, and you can picture the way his hair would be stuck to his forehead as he pounded into you, completely lost in the feeling of you squeezing him.

“I’m gonna come, baby.” You gasp out. You feel like you have no control over your body as though Spencer was completely in control even though it’s your fingers frantically stroking.

“Are you? Are you going to make yourself come all over your fingers?”

“Yes, I have to. I –”

“Yeah, you do. You’re doing so well. I need to hear you come. I need to hear you be so good for me. Coming all over your fingers, all by yourself. But you’re thinking of me aren’t you?”

“Yes… yes. Always.”

“I can make you come so hard even when I’m not there. And you’re going to make a mess, a beautiful, perfect mess as you finish.” You moan loudly. “That’s it. Just like that.” He’s groaning and muttering, and you know he’s close too. “I wish I was coming in you, feeling you clench around me. And I’d rub that needy clit of yours, your nails would be scratching against my skin because you just can’t help yourself. Please come, baby. I need it.”

You come with his name on your lips, your body clenches and shakes, and you listen closely to his climax. He lets out a shaky breath after a few moments. “I love you.” He says, and you hate that you can’t kiss him.

“I love you too.” Your breathing slowly returns to normal.

“Are you okay?” He checks in with you, and you smile as you roll onto your side and settle deeper into the bed, suddenly very tired.

“I’m great. Are you?” You yawn.

“Yes. Get some sleep, sweetheart.”

“Come home soon.”

“I’m coming home to you as soon as I possibly can. I can’t be apart from you like this.”

“Neither can I. Talk to me until I fall asleep?”

“Of course. Anything for you.”

tag list: @spenciesprincess @catalinasroom @tylevx

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid smut #spencer reid x reader #kinktober #kinktober 2023 #my writing

635 notes · View notes