#cannot be bothered to define every flower

[beelittle]

Tricking myself into drawing backgrounds by saying I can just put ctommy into the scene

[cripplecharacters]

Sorry to bother you,

Your blog is wonderful! Since it's one of the most dialogue/explanation oriented, i wondered if i may please come to you with a more general doubt. i'm sincerely confused... Why is "curing" disability bad per se?

So far, the arguments (on Tumblr) seem to be,

i. Consent.

ii. Generalisation. ("Everyone will want this same thing".)

iii. The undercurrent ideology holding disability as a flaw to be "cured" (including the use of the term "cure").

On which we all agree, they're implicitly bad no matter if it's disability or a haircut. Very well.

But.

What of magical healing per se is inherently bad? Because being given a choice implies that for every given person agreeing, there are going to be others who won't. So we should still write our fantastical society around them, that's not in any way in question.

But these, the possibility of magical treatment and the non-necessity of the same, are not mutually exclusive. You don't have to "take one before the other", they can very well coexist.

Last question (i promise), is seeking treatment for oneself bad?

Like, if there came up a quest to get the glittering flower blooming once a millennia guarded by the Evil Dragon of Evil and capable of magically taking away OCD and PTSD, sign me up! Or if there's a spell to resuscitate my thyroid or an alchemical pill that solves ADHD's executive dysfunction. i mean, that's kind of what my medications should do if they weren't so costly and inaccessible, and that would be a one-time thing too.

Autism's doing alright, i'd keep everything, thanks.

Disclaimer, i'm obviously not advocating for eugenetics (as this term has been often used and misused in these discussions, better to precise).

All these conditions in one way or another define me and effect my life in a pervasive, quotidian way, or/and on a more existential scale. Not always in bad ways -my life is not a tragedy, and this i wish to make clear. i'm not saying that a "magic cure" should come before a change in society to accommodate disability. What i'm advocating for is their coexistence, as a choice -not evil per se, but nocive if inserted in a context of ableism, negation of individual consent, and, indeed, choice.

Or at least that was what i was arguing for until a few months ago. Now however, seeing as the collective opinion is one of strong rejection for these ideas, i believe there must be some important fallacies in my reasoning, and i wish, before everything else, to correct them. To understand.

Sorry for the monologue, but, may you help me?

Thank you for your time and for your kindness,

Anonymous Sloth.

Thank you for your ask! The reason curing disability is bad in media is because the disabilities cured often cannot be cured in real life. People with incurable disabilities already have so little representation, taking away the characters they see themselves in with an impossible cure is incredibly disheartening. I live with multiple incurable physical conditions, and I’ve accepted that I’ll live with them for the rest of my life. Day to day I already deal with people saying how much better my life would be if I didn’t have these conditions I had no choice in getting, I don’t want to see that in my stories! If someone has my conditions I don’t want the author to get rid of them with magic, I want to see that character going on cool adventures and being badass! Sure a magical cure might be nice, but that’s never going to happen. I’m going to be living in this body for the rest of my life, and I want to see stories where people like me get to live their lives with their conditions!

Disabled people should be allowed to see themselves in sci-fi and fantasy stories! People who can’t be cured, who can only have their symptoms managed, who have to be on medication/assistive devices the rest of their lives and who don’t want to be cured should be allowed to see themselves in media without the constant reminder that most able bodied people think their lives would be so much better is they would simply stop being disabled.

Additionally, even conditions that do have cures or ways to manage them aren’t realistically portrayed. There are never any symptoms, side effects or rehabilitation, it’s always portrayed as a magical cure that completely gets rid of the disability. This rarely happens in real life, and I don’t think it’s wrong for someone who shares a condition with a character to want to see that condition accurately portrayed.

It’s perfectly fine for a disabled person in media to want to seek treatment, plenty of disabled people in the real world also have to fight to get treatment (though the fighting is usually against insurance and doctors, not dragons and wizards). But like I said above, it should be at least somewhat realistic. The world is already over saturated with stories of people getting magical cures that make everything better forever, but what about cures with long lasting or permanent side effect? What about healing that requires extensive physical therapy? Or someone who needs to take potions for the rest of their lives to manage their condition? These realities should also be portrayed. Sure maybe some people want to see an escapist fantasy where their conditions could get cured, but not everyone wants that and it’s almost entirely done by abled authors who fathom why anyone would want to see a disabled person who isn’t trying to ‘overcome’ their disability.

We’ve also reblogged this post & answered this ask that deal with similar topics if you want to check them out.

I hope this helps! Have a nice day,

Mod Rot

-

Everything Mod Rot said.

Basically, it's like giving us representation and then taking it away. Readers with that disability are going to read that book and relate to that character. Having a character like you in a work can be so important. But then the character is magically cured of an incurable condition, and now they're completely abled. Good for them. But the reader is still disabled. The reader will still always be disabled.

Disabled representation is already so rare. It's not really nice to take away what little we have.

- Mod Aaron

Echoing what everyone else has said, I want to add an extra thing:

If there was a wealth of disabled characters in media, represented with respect and nuance and care and all that, some stories involving disability being cured wouldn’t feel out of place, because there would already be so much to see that it would be an interesting departure and not posed as the only option for a happy ending.

And if you’re writing something about curing a disability that you have because that’s your experience and it’s what you want, that would make sense as well.

But since so many representations of disability in media have the underlying message that the only way to truly be happy or worthy or whatever with a disability is to have it cured, to have the least amount of signs of disabilities ever, then adding more of the same to that can be not just frustrating but harmful.

An “overcoming” of disability, a “making invisible” of a visible disability, or a cure for a disability are not the only stories worth telling about disabled people—because they are also not the only lives worth living for disabled people.

— mod sparrow

[ultraericthered]

One Villainous Scene: Not Alright

[Feel I should start doing these types of posts at least once a month.]

In this case, the scene and character in question aren't "villainous" in the purest, most traditional sense of how you'd define that, but it comes off the heels of an antagonistic character acting in a very antagonistic way that makes him the closest thing to a villain this story has got despite him also being one of the six main characters. I'm of course referring to Atsumu Matsuyuki, AKA Yukiatsu, from the 11 episode anime Anohana: The Flower We Saw That Day.

For context, Yukiatsu was...more than a little bothered by hearing that his childhood ex-friend Jinta "Jintan" Yadomi, who he'd long been envious and resentful of, was allegedly able to see and communicate with the ghost of their deceased childhood friend, Meiko "Menma" Honma. We'd also been shown that Yukiatsu might have some skeletons in (literally) his closet. Then a few days back, Poppo caught a glimpse of Menma in the woods near the six friends old Secret Base, meaning Jintan isn't so special in this regard. And then Yukiatsu said he'd communicated with Menma too, but the actual Menma protests that Yukiatsu is lying. Now, at the end of Episode 4 and the start of Episode 5, we get the truth: the "Menma" that Poppo saw earlier who has been stalking around the forest and casting doubt on Jintan's claims about Menma...is, in fact, Yukiatsu with shaved legs and wearing a wig and dress in order to ressemble his deceased childhood sweetheart. Who could've seen that coming?

And that brings us to this scene, the moment where Yukiatsu finally shows us who he really is. Jintan tries to keep calm as he asks his old friend "are you alright?" And Yukiatsu. Mcfreaking. SNAPS, thrusting Jintan to the ground and putting a stranglehold on his neck, furiously asking "Do I seem alright to you?" More disturbingly, he proceeds to ask, in total seriousness, "Do I look like her? 'Cause you can SEE Menma, isn't that right? Say it! Do I look like Menma? Yes or no?", all with a completely unhinged look on his face. Once he's no longer strangling Jintan and is just holding him up by his shirt, Yukiatsu begins to break down in tears as he finally expresses why he finds Jintan's claims about ghost Menma so impossible to believe - he is convinced that if Menma's spirit rose from the grave and came back to the Earth, the person she'd want to visit, interact with, haunt or even curse would be him. Because according to Yukiatsu, it was his actions and something he'd said to Menma on that last day all six friends were together that directly led to Menma's following death. In his own words, he killed Menma. For years, Yukiatsu was racked with guilt over this and had a secret yearning for Menma to return to him, to make him face some divine punishment for it which would also serve as closure for him. But no matter how hard he hoped for it, he's never been able to see Menma, not even in his dreams. He seems far more hung up on the late Menma than Jintan ever was or could ever be, so to him it makes no sense why it'd be Jintan and not him that Menma would opt to appear to. By now, he's a weeping wreck.

There are, however, two good reasons why Menma went to Jintan and not to Yukiatsu. One is plot-based and revealed later on (has to do with Jintan's dead mother), but the other is left implicit: Yukiatsu has never been truly hung up on Menma, but on himself in direct relation to Menma. Every sentence out of Yukiatsu's mouth during this breakdown just oozes with self-absorption, self-obsession, and entitlement. His mind cannot fathom, cannot comprehend a scenario in which he is not made the center of his deceased friend's attention, in which he is not considered by the girl herself to be the friend who'd made the greatest impact on her and was the most crucial figure in her life, even if in a negative way that reflects poorly on him. He does not want to process the possibility that after death, Menma has rejected him in favor of Jinta Yadomi, just as he'd feared she'd do in life when they were children. Jintan remembers Menma for who she was, valued who she was, cares even now for who she was and is. Yukiatsu has been and remains fixated on Menma for what she was to him; his would-be trophy GF. An extension of his sense of self.

It's my belief that Yukiatsu is a psychopath, or close enough to one, as he hits off many boxes of the psychopathy checklist. He'd loved Menma as dearly as he could ever love someone, and deeply regrets his percieved part in her death with the most remorse he's capable of, as he is still only human. But not only do his consistent thinking and behavior showcase an inability to empathize with others and put their own feelings and individual personhoods on a level equal to his own, his actions in later episodes serve to undermine the purity of his feelings that this scene brings to the forefront, partcularly when he cajoles Anaru into getting the five living friends to re-enact the last time they were all together, right in front of Menma who he for 100% certainty knows is in there with them watching it all, mainly as a way to hurt Jintan. Such cruelty comes all too easy to him, and even when re-connected with his oldest friends, he seems to process life itself through the filter of "how does or can this relate to me?"

Yet the writing never simply makes him out to be a complete lost cause either, and that's also showcased beautifully in this scene. As he continues to weep, Menma walks over to Jintan and softly tells him something, prompting Jintan to announce out loud what she's saying to him. At first, Yukiatsu is getting aghast that even now, Jintan would mock him by "pretending" to see and hear Menma while he and none of the others can, but when Jintan mentions "that pretty hair clip", something that was only between Yukiatsu and Menma that Jintan could not possibly know of unless he heard it directly from Menma herself, he stands in shock, his tears dry, and he just...walks away. Like he needs to get back home and rethink everything. Even at his most deranged, Yukiatsu's heart can be reached, and his mind made to see reason and clarity, even if he is still a creep about it all.

Aside from the presence of the ghostly Menma as a supernatural occurance, Anohana is typically a very grounded and very believable anime, so this plot turn of a crazed, cross-dressing Yukiatsu so easily could've thrown it off for me. But as I watched it dubbed, what really saves and sells this moment for me is Ray Chase. He is astonishing with his voice acting for Yukiatsu and he holds nothing back in the character's bouts of madness. This man is so mad talented and so committed to his voice acting roles that his take on Yukiatsu elevates the character into almost a horror villain, which fits when you know that Chase would later provide the voice for an actual horror villain! This character, and this scene especially, really do belong to him, and so they linger in my memory, haunting me like Menma herself.

[abyssalpriest]

20231204

L: Amphitrite, beloved. A liquid mirror, smooth and unquestioning. Except for when each wave rolls in, a royal courting of sky and ocean in cyclical yet stationary clocks of wound time, expected experiences. Lines are stitched into everything with delicate hands.

Reality only talks about us in names, in bodies we barely fit into. At the edge of all things we know each other, the mountain atop which we play, live, dream; there is here a union that is inseparable by any hands other than our own. We cannot be pried off each other. The ocean currents and their command, but really, which commands which, who commands who? There is no greater force in my life than the ocean; there is no greater force in the ocean than its command. There is no greater force in the brain than electricity, no greater force upon electricity than the confines of a brain. Imagine: To be reigned in so tightly, bridled in well-fitted leathers peeled from the skin of holy cows, held back by lover's hands. To be directed in every instance to fill each and every valley of the body...

But addressals only take us so far. Behind the names are mathematical expressions and declarations. Behind labels of gods are realities of Supreme Laws, there is the hypnotic communion of Shiva and Shakti and there is the plain text revelation of black and white expressions of God, Brahman's dreaming babbling exuding forth...

She and I are inseparable, except we are very separable. An item as they say.

I have drawn an oath with reality herself. She is to me the wife, she is Shakti; I am to her a sacred, hidden thing; she is to me everything on display both mental and material, obvious and obfuscated, understood and unknown, physical and immaterial. She is the book to the words, the matrix to the map, the power to the ruler, the fishbowl to the fish. She is rules and stipulations to he who asks for permission, the keeper of secrets to he who knows them...

There is a God, and there is a realm. There is an impulse, and there us something which is compelled. There is referencing and the referenced, the dancer and the music...

Explicitly: Atop the holy mountain I swim in a place so thick of a vacuum it becomes dense as the bottom of the ocean. Here, I know the waters better than most. Humans sing about me often in reference to her, they never can divide us, because I have lost the ability to divide us. I have known of my role as Shiva for a long, long time. I know of Shiva and Shakti, of the idea of the Supreme Consciousness in inseparable union with reality. Manifestation and growing into oneself involves - as all things do - the interplay of the spirals of time as it loops on repeat. Macrocosm feeds microcosm, history defines the coming eras, everything is fractalised by nature. I learned who I was, and I learned to dissolve myself in reality once again. Over and over and over I give myself to the ocean, each and every time I allow myself to be consumed yet untouched, the consciousness in the waves, the eyes in that dark abyss, the husband to the matriarchal wife...

You ask me to write about sleep. I know her well.

20231219

L: Acceptance of all that there is and can be... What an idea, an ancient one. The black oceans are perpetually observing retinas, but they are of eyes that do not blink. Bring her flowers, bring her dead children, she encompasses them all the same. Blood and semen, laughter and screams, she doesn't respond in the ways you'd expect. Unconscious, unbothered by the things that irk the consciousness... Except she very much is bothered. She is the matrix of the brain that enforces disgust, she is the rules of the game which tell us we must react. Really, she stands on the edge of the bed, unbudging dominatrix, demands...

An older woman, older than even we the first puppies born of the God of Angels' womb... More knowledgeable, I suppose, in that her body was the only appropriate forest from which we carved trees for our library. Vahana, deep fractal lake, gateway...

Incarnation was a necessary process to understand her. It was always going to be a matter of laying naked in front of her stripped of all dignity and all secrets, her black eyes tearing skin from bone, nowhere to run, tied to the marital bed therefore no way to run. She is best understood inside her with her black gaze trickling down your body.

[heedmywarnings]

Who am I?

Existential crisis1!1!1!1!1

●■●

As you sat in the Liyuen prison cell, you wondered. You deeply wondered if... if this was the same game you knew? You weren't the type of person to ponder about the existence if things, but this was different.

You are in a game, and you never bothered to question it? The question you should be asking yourself is: How did I get here? But instead, it's: Who am I supposed to be?

The answer to the latter is... you're supposed to be an Impostor, like every typical sagau impostor fic. You saw your blood, gold. But have you ever looked at a mirror? Look at yourself and deduce that you are not an inpostor? Who even are you? What are you?

●■●

Do you... even remember your life before? Are you the same person?

Questions flooded your brain but the answer could never seem to float, are you or are you not an Impostor? Was the question you settled for. If so, then why didn't people start... treating you better if they saw your golden blood? It was clear as day, but the answer never seemed to appear.

●■●

Though you cannot see your face, you settled for looking at your body instead. It was the same?

"H-hello?" You managed to mutter, your voice was the same but always seem to break, your hair? Same color. Your scars/defining marks? Still there.

●■●

You looked down at your palms.

A four tipped star and a triquetra symbol on your left, and a yellow flower on the right. You didn't know what it meant, neither did you know what it was doing there.

Something is amidst.

Rather... someone?

People You Know - Selena Gomez [0:34]

TAGLIST

which I forgot (again)

@yandere-city

@5sos-wdw

@code-roevember

@candlebathwater

@d4ff0d1l14

@valeriele3

@iruiji

@chuuya-brainrot

@xiaosonlybeloved

@00hellohello00

@etherisy

@kytesse

@the-unknown-wanderer

@77hutao

@campanula-rotundifolia

@bloop-booop

@idiotic-anime-lover

[antiloreolympus]

10 Anti LO Asks

1. i seriously cannot get over how RS tried to make Apollo and Artemis being Zeus' children be a shock

like how was that surprising

how was that a twist

was she running out of ideas for more "drama" or something

2. This is more of a rant about all modern retellings of the taking of Persephone, but LO is the most egregious example to me. I despise how much the story has been warped and twisted to make Hades seem like a good guy and Demeter as a bad guy. Persephone’s story was meant to represent the strong bond between mothers and daughters, and the grief of a mother when her daughter is married off and separated from her. It always pisses me off when it’s portrayed as a love story, which unfortunately, is how it’s always shown nowadays. The way Demeter is treated by the LO fanbase and RS herself angers me to no end. It’s so disheartening to see misogyny win yet again with the modern demonization of Persephone’s grieving mother. 

3. What really bothers me is that new born infant Persephone has full done eye brows and teeth. Like holy fuck babies don't look like that did RS just really draw P's normal adult face on baby her???

4. I don't think Rachel is even reading the mythology right. It's not supposed to be a morality tale with clearly defined villains and heroes Even Zeus could be outsmarted, knocked down, and made to reflect on his bad choices, and he's the Top God. Rachel instead boiling down mythology to "good vs bad" with no shades of grey and needing the good guys to always be right with the bad guys always being wrong is just bad from a writing and interpretation standpoint. Even Disney gave them more nuance.

5. The de-twinkification of Thanatos and Eros should forever be a crime 

6. I love when LO fans realize Amphitrite is also a nymph and they realize the world building makes no sense because surely if every other nymph is hated shouldn't she be too? Or is she just one of the "good ones"? Truly give it up for a white woman to think the gods needed divine racism to seem more ~real~, with their racism being framed as a good thing because all the marginalized nymphs are all bad and uppity save for the few "I have a nymph friend" excuses.

7. I just find it so creepy Hades' first look of Persephone is her being humiliated and then him lusting after her body before even glancing at her face. Like what is that telling us exactly? 99% of the time we only get his POV too. We get Hades' POV looking at her, his internal dialogue, his thoughts, his memories, more focus on his life and relationships, meanwhile the only time we ever got her POV was her being r//ped and murdering a village. She seems like an afterthought most of the time.

8. What I find frustrating is RS has removed any sort of meaning or symbolism in P's design. The red eyes used to symbolize her inner darkness, only to now show up at random and go away just as fast. the long hair used to be tied to her strong emotions but now come up whenever it fitS better with her outfit, and now claiming her pink tone is from "a million perfect roses" is a laughable attempt to make her unique when the flower nymphs are the same color. She can't even keep her own lore in line.

9. IDK how we're supposed to buy Persephone has any guilt or even cares about her nymph "sisters" when she purposely ran away from the law instead of turning herself in, tried to sob story her way out of punishment, and tried to distract from her crimes with Elysium plans, and more so never once showed she remembered the nymphs or even tried to see them in the Underworld despite working and living there for weeks and having direct access with the King of the Dead. She's all talk and no reflection.

10. What I don't get with so many HxP retellings (and LO is the most egregious example) is they think the romance can ONLY come about with the destruction of Demeter and Persephone's relationship to prop her relationship up with Hades, which seems so reductive to me. A half-way decent writer should allow for Persephone to love them both, yet no one seems to even try. Their idea of the "reclaimed" myth is that Persephone's world starts and ends at Hades, and Demeter is to be vilified.

[the-dream-pawners-canvas]

[ Genshin Impact Imagines ]

Imagine #1 : Of Bargains and Contracts - That which is the most precious shade of gold

Vago Mundo - Zhongli

Imagine having doubts about the fairness of your contract with Zhongli.

After a long day of adventuring for one of Zhongli's rare botanical requests (that ofc, you obtained through your own expenses as per your contract- you felt robbed due to that, truly you did, in which universe was it fair to make the adventurer pay for expenses spent on obtaining your requests? However, you do not find yourself complaining -at least not directly to the person involved- any time soon. Not when he so easily smiles so handsomely -so happily- whenever you provide him with what he requested).

His smiles are going to run me dry of mora, I just know it, you tell yourself. One of these days it would and when you'd need to have a weapon refined but is too damned broke for it -or worse, go starving in the midst of one of your many journeys, Paimon would have your ass for it.

Maybe, just maybe, all of those supposed adventurers that Zhongli had once mentioned in one of his more factual tales to have often decided on staying in Liyue was because of him. Maybe he flashed a great many of them his polished smile and gentlemanly attitude and had just gotten them reeled in- hook, line, and sinker.

Putting it that way, he doesn't sound any more than a con-man, Paimon had blatantly stated so the other day,

'A well-mannered one but a con nevertheless! Who even forgets to bring their wallet nowadays, huh, (Y/N)? Think about it!'

And a part of you do consider it, do boil with the thought. That perhaps you were just being used, that maybe The Mysterious Guest of Wangshu Inn was no more than a conniving, sly, inconveniently comely-

To your surprise, you reach your destination, your thoughts quite a distracting orchestra dedicated to the funeral director. Thoughts that made you steel your nerves as you glared at the polished wooden doors that served as an entrance to Zhongli's study, your mind made up to hand a piece of it to the man who resided just beyond.

'Zhongli, I feel as if the contract we have is rather unfair. You cannot honestly expect me to continue on with this without going broke. We need to make amends to make this transactional relationship work. Paimon is already being a pain since they needed to cut off on food, I do not want to imagine how Kaeya would react once he learns that these commissions from you is funded by our joint expenses and with no reimbursement whatsoever.'

Okay, that sounds good, you think. Civil, proper and not watering down the gravity your true monetary concerns. He'd understand, you hope and place your bets on the proper man that you believe him to be. The concept of mora may just be entirely insignificant to him, only too inconveniently that he forgets he'd need those to make purchases and obtain basic necessities in between his more luxurious wants, which you find ironic.

Taking in a deep breath, you turn the knob of the door and pry it open only to be met by a sight that had might as well called dibs on your future funds down to the last mora.

There stood Zhongli, tall and elegant as always but with far lesser clothes than what he usually has on himself. His coat was nowhere to be seen and instead all there was is his cream undershirt and well-tailored trousers- too damned tight, shirt folded to his elbows, untucked, unbuttoned and deshriveled as his tie was. The longer strands of his luscious locks were out of their usual ponytail and instead pooled about his shoulders and down past his waist.

The backs of his thighs were flush against his mahogany office desk as he leaned back on it, body turned away from you as he concentrated on the energy that was quite literally pulsating as it hovered above the palm of his gloved hand.

The very object that casted such a rich and ethereal golden glow inside the darkened room, painting shadows and lights upon his already sculpted face as if oil on pristine canvas. It was a collection of the palettes that defined Liyue- the dawnbreaks mirrored by cor lapis that littered the ground and the sunsets and high noons radiated by the cryptic shrines and towers that stood as mighty pillars and age-old sentries over the entire island.

On his hand, and with eyes that glimmered with utmost concentration, Zhongli holds a manifesting geoculus-

-traces of the geo archon, the memories and legacy of Rex Lapis.

The implication of it all coaxed a sharp breath out of you and it was this that had snapped the man out of his trance-like preoccupation. He turns towards your general vicinity and his amber eyes widens in surprise for a fraction of a second, the entirety of him taking in the appearance of a deer that had just been caught underneath a street light,

"Ah! Traveler, you arrived far sooner than I had expected!" the distinct light rumble of an uncertain laugh colored his words, his elegant brows furrowing ever so slightly at the astounded look that seemed to have taken an enduring residence on your face before a dawning realization occurred to him- the geoculus he held on his hands.

In flagrante delicto.

"Far sooner, indeed." he chuckles, a fond look swimming in his eyes, a look that heated them into molten gold, gold that traveled unto your throat and spread through your chest like rare colored crystalflies, "It seems that the cat is finally out of the bag," he pushes himself off the table after dismissing the completed geoculus with a wave of his hand and takes languid -albeit, almost coy- steps towards you, those amber gems of his relentless on their search for the placement of your emotions regarding the matter at hand, "Tell me, dear traveler, what do you make of it?" his voice was deep, too deep, as if all intentions were drawn from wanting to drown you in every syllable that left his enticingly thin lips.

You gulp, your limbs suddenly at war as to whether it may find solace in seeking purchase on the ground or in running, "Y-you're... You're the geo archon." you stammered as you looked up at the man who now stood but a mere respectable distance in front of you. It was now you who quaked in front of him instead of the ground or a foe as would always whenever he would display his skill in battle or as portrayed in tales whenever a god would make itself known to mortals. Zhongli had no direct hand on your reaction however, it is the least of his intentions as he willed his presence to remain as it had been before- steady and strong, perhaps a bit intimidating but only to those who did wrong and with an enduring grace reminiscent of willow trees.

He hums in thought and bestows upon you a tender shake of the head, "I was meaning to ask about the feasibility of such unorthodox compensation for your troubles," he asks with the faintest hint of qualms.

You stood there in disbelief.

It just occurred to you then that on the course of your little commissions for him, with every flower he asked you to pick from the most perilous peaks there had always been a geoculus time and again- always a mere reach from where you ought to be, always without fail- a piece of his soul, an essence of Liyue, his memories, his very being and he asks you this as if they were worth so little.

You were getting more than you bargained for and here Zhongli was doing as you had done before- not for himself but on your behalf.

"I- your- a geoculus, an oculus, it's a region's very essence, did I get that right?" You ask even though you know that is the gist of it and a nod from Zhongli provides a seal of confirmation. Venti took the time to explain it to you and then some during one of his once-in-a-blue-moon somber days (when he had one too many drinks, and was in an oddly reminiscent mood), "Venti, he also said an oculus is thus a collection of the reigning archon's memories and a part of the whole that makes them. Is that also true?"

Delight brightens up his already pleasant lips, "I see you are well educated, traveler. Perhaps the bard is not as less as his drinking habits tend to make of him."

"Then why must you still ask me if it is worth my troubles? Of course it would be!" you suddenly find yourself indignant much to Zhongli's surprise, "You'd think such a significant part of you is worth so little, you'd have a heartattack once you skirt beyond the high walls blocking your emotional awareness and see just how many people are throwing themselves on your path just for a chance to pick at the crumbs underneath the soles of your boots!"

And then Zhongli's lips part, eyes glittering and pale cheeks paying homage to budding roses and he just stays like that for a couple of seconds and you realize that you may have run your mouth far too much.

You suddenly want to throw yourself off of one of Liyue's many gorges, good luck to anyone who might want to bother with finding your corpse.

Kaeya might just find that oddly amusing, Paimon not much so.

Zhongli clears his throat and holds his hands behind his back, an eyebrow raised in benevolent scrutiny, "Perhaps the bard may have taught you more than I initially expected. That, or you are -quite unexpectedly- a naturally smooth fellow who knows your way with words, traveler."

"Did you just call me a smooth-talker?" you don't know just where exactly this conversation would be leading you both but he's now making his way back to his desk with a sort of almost imperceptible perk on his steps and sway on his hips and you're now certain that you are compensated well above the usual pay grade by this suddenly too evasive, too temptingly slinky geo archon.

"Perhaps," Zhongli chuckles in amusement at your obvious verbal efforts to pin him back, "A flatterer indeed."

So here's a little fanart I did of our broke Geo daddei/archon, Zhongli! Along with a little imagine to spice things up!

I can't emphasize enough the amount of time, energy, positivity and irl mora this event had sucked out of me and I'm still yet to get him. I know my luck sucks at the highest possible level so would y'all be a jolly lot by helping this wee simp out of her depressed gacha dug hell hole and re-blog for a chance to have this penniless connoisseur come home to me pls

I'm desperate, truly.

Art, Imagine © Yours Truly (pls do credit me when you do re-blog or redistribute, otherwise don't bother)

Zhongli, Genshin Impact �� miHoYo

[ginkgomoon]

Victor’s Aura- A Character Aura Study

This post is my take on Victor’s aura, taken from my knowledge and intuition to depict what kind of aura he has! I did one on Gavin, as well as Gavin’s astrological birth chart so if you haven’t seen them, you can read them after this post!

What is an Aura? “Aura” by the dictionary is “the distinctive atmosphere or quality that seems to surround and be generated by a person, thing, or place”. 

It’s essentially the electromagnetic energy field that surrounds all living things. It’s the magnetic field of vibration like how a lighted candle is lit and how a scent or perfume surrounds a flower. In fact, it’s correctly described as an extension of the body. It’s a part of every cell. Your aura can be affected by anything, including traumas, memories and emotions. It can tell us a lot about a person’s mental, physical, emotional state, vitality and path of life. Habitual thoughts, emotions and even illnesses can be clearly revealed. If a person changes their long standing thoughts and emotions, the aura will too reflect that. 

Victor’s Aura There are many layers to the aura but let’s start off with the “ground” colour. This is the main colour that dominates the aura both in size and intensity. It’s arguably the most important colour as it shows what the person should be doing in their life. 

Victor’s main ground colour is dark yellow (keep in mind this is not defined as “murky”- when someone is lost and muddled in their life). People with dark yellow as their ground are confident, well adjusted and analytical. As a result, they take life one step at a time, one goal at a time, ensuring every project is seen through properly to completion to avoid problems and setbacks later. They are patient people, setting their worthwhile goals in no hurry to reach them, as they know without a doubt that they will obtain their deserved reward in the end. They prefer to do things rationally and in a logical manner, especially at work where they are required to make use of their good memory and love for detail. As they are ambitious and persistent, they often take up roles of leadership, responsibility and of importance. From his corrections on MC’s reports to the food he makes at Souvenir (that is insisted to be cooked according to certain temperatures), Victor is no doubt a detail-oriented leader even whether if the goal he wants to achieve is related to work or not. 

MC: It’s a sort of mark that can be left in literature or in a photograph… and I can feel it. Victor’s eyes are lowered. In his clear and tranquil eyes, there are ripples of light and shadows. Victor: Such as? The smile tugging at the corner of his mouth is clear, and I ponder this seriously. MC: For example, the way I write proposals has changed. The format of my proposals has changed. The indent of the first line, font size 15, 1.5 spacing between lines… it’s the format you find most pleasing to the eye! Victor’s eyebrow quirks. Victor: That’s all? MC: There’s more! I’ve become so much more picky with food. I never used to complain that food tastes bad, but eating at Souvenir has cultivated my palate. Now, when I eat even Michelin meals, I feel as if something’s lacking… -CN Exhibition Date 

“What happened with SE is just an example. We’re from different businesses and different fields. There’s no need to compare yourself with me. Also, I’m older than you. When you’ve reached my age, you might attain the achievements I have today.” -CN Night Meeting Date

“Slow and steady wins the race” is the moral that they live by, but sometimes adhering to this credo may frustrate others as they can be so analytical and detail oriented at times- usually at great lengths. A cute little add from the Tender Regards Date around the concept of snail mail, time (Victor’s evol!) and the goal of always reaching your destination in the end demonstrate this this motif in Victor’s relationship with MC.

“Looks like you should have received this Future Mail. Apart from supporting your event, I’m only going to do this once. This will not be repeated. The things I want to say to you are all in this videotape. It only belongs to you.” -CN Tender Regards Date 

“When will you finally understand? It’s all right. I’m patient. I’ll wait for you to see the light slowly.” -Rooftop Date

Although they have feelings, they only ever reveal it to people close to them. They enjoy the detail and technicality of conversations and find it hard to talk about their emotions. Victor’s Exhibition and Tender Regards Date are very useful sources of information in relation to these topics, as it displays Victor’s deep emotions of affection to MC and highlights the importance of expressing emotions to those you love. Dark yellow aura peoples’ greatest lesson in life is to be more emotionally open, and when do they do, it usually occurs later in life. 

“The writer wrote it down herself - “The time I spent loving someone, not a single second of it was wasted.” I rarely hear such words leave Victor’s mouth, and it makes me feel a little surreal. In my memory, we very rarely talk about the topic of ‘love’. Maybe it’s because he rarely says what’s in his heart. Maybe it’s because I’m used to being thick-skinned. We never have the opportunity to seriously understand the meaning in these words. -CN Exhibition Date 

“Do you still remember the special episode on “Feelings” from before? Actually, this theme was inspired by that episode. Giving gifts is a common way to express how one feels. But it’s not that easy to send a gift to the future. With Future Mail, the sender can convey their feelings and surprises in this gift to the other party across time.” -CN Tender Regards date 

People with dark yellow as their ground enjoy system and order such as routines at work and in their home life. This is applied to Victor’s strict schedules in his day to day life, such as taking on what time he sleeps and when he gets up to go on his morning jogs. They need to consider new ideas before grudgingly accepting them. This is especially applied to when Victor always says “just this once” to MC when he’s being “childish” with her (but we really know that isn’t the case, he knows this all too well, too). 

“Because a certain greedy cat always says she wants to eat something sweet after dinner, I made pudding before leaving the house. Do you think this is a mark of how I’ve been changed?” -CN Exhibition Date 

Next is Victor’s “radiating” colour. This represents his interests and motivations. It adds strength to the ground colour. They can work well in harmony, some can conflict. 

I would take Victor’s radiating as violet. Violet is a very highly spiritual colour, as people with this colour as their radiating will have a very spiritual take on life, as they are deep thinkers who like to analyse everything and think matters though logically. They are also naturally intuitive. Violet radiatings have the ability to come up with unique and unusual solutions to problems. As they enjoy learning, they have the potential to become experts in their field of endeavour- which is no surprise for Victor as he’s basically an “on top of the world tyrant” in the industry of finances. In addition, they feel things deeply, but rather operate things on an emotionally free level- again with the ground aura traits to enhance this! However, Victor too, has a high EQ despite this.

“I’m no different from you. There are many things I cannot do or force to make happen. It’s okay to not be strong, it’s okay to not do well. You don’t have to bottle up your emotions.” … “I won’t tell you to keep holding on no matter what difficulties you face. That isn’t realistic. There will come a time when you will become an even better version of yourself who will have enough courage and experience to deal with all of this.” -CN Colours of Rain Date 

Overall, Victor’s aura of darker yellow and violet depict him as more of a straightforward kind of person, hardworking and articulate, however soon we realise there’s more to what we see of Victor, like how MC thinks that Victor comes off as a “heartless CEO” throughout the main story chapters but he slowly warms up to her whilst determining to prove her wrong. Victor is wise, and doesn’t bother to put in his personal efforts to where it’s not needed, but when it’s up to him- he strives to go all the way for perfection and with the best of his ability. He spends a lot of time in deep contemplation to determine his plans of attack which allows him to execute them well. His values and worth ethics will always in the end allow him to make time for MC, no matter how busy he is :) 

And lastly…

Victor leans against the window, his face still written with distaste, but he does not attempt to remove that childish-looking blanket. He brings the red cup to his lips and gently blows on it. The warm light encases him, softening the aura surrounding him. His outline also appears gentler. He doesn’t look as impossible to get close to. My eyes land on Victor, but he doesn’t seem to notice. He puts down the cup in his hands, lowering his eyes, as though deep in thought. This is a Victor I have never seen before… In this moment, he seems to have put down his stubbornness and distant aura - becoming someone within reach. Only now does Victor finally feel my gaze. He raises his head to look at me. -CN Warm Date 

All of a sudden, he lifts his other hand gently. A water droplet pelts onto his palm, as though pulling him into the pattering rain. Seeing this, I find myself subconsciously frozen in place. Because of the enshrouding misty rain, the Victor before me appears warmer and more tender than usual. -CN Tender Regards Date 

It always has and always will be MC to see this side of him- the tenderness and the willingness of how he opens up to her- his aura willingly to embrace hers too. Fun fact- auras can deflect off one another if you’re with someone you dislike. But when it’s with two people in love, their auras connect, combine and produce an even brighter and bigger accommodating aura for the both of them. He’s certainly living working towards to achieve his greatest life goals- both in his businesses and being with MC, striving together to make great changes and milestones in their respective industries. Without a doubt, she has helped Victor’s aura grow, expand and shine the many rays through his doubts, allowing a light from within to burn brighter and evolve him into more of the brilliant, hardworking and tender man we know today.

[thesedangeroustemptations]

Decided to post one of my OC’s on here, so I hope y’all like her

(        the devil's match        )          ┊     ❛  ya know, being a dick will not make yours any bigger, so can we skip that step and get to the part where I break your neck? ❜

   character name   . .  kyomi tausa'afia ka'uhane.

   title / ring name   . .  ms. ka'uhane / 'the goddess of volcanoes and destruction, pele!'

   meaning of names   . .   

kyomi:  "pure and beautiful, to cleanse." named after her paternal grandmother, it was one handed down every few generations to those who seemed to shine bright with purity from birth, which was exactly what she appeared to have done. as she grew, she always had a shining glint in her eye, though many would say it's one of mischief while others see differently.

tausa'afia:  " pleasant, lovable " in the first few days of her life, she didn't have a middle name as their family reserved it for when their personality began to shine through, that way they had a name that fit them that emerged later on. kyomi was a sweet and adorable baby, capturing the hearts of anyone who held or even looked at her, hence why her middle names meaning reflects just that. 

ka'uhane : " soul, spirit " the surname is from her father's family line, having been derived 1500 years ago to distinguish his family's martial arts as users of spirit and soul, versus just muscle and occasional mind.

  nicknames   . .  

" i can't believe you'd put yourself in danger like this, kyo, do you thrive on getting your head kicked in that badly? "  —  wakatsuki takeshi, seething, after winning her battle against saw paing but sustaining major injuries.

" pele, you'd better not fucking lose, fuck him up!  "  —  adam dudley and cosmo imai yelling at her from the stands during her match.

" the strength of your spirit never ceases to amaze me, tausa, but remember, even the strong need to rest sometimes, and you need to realize that doesn't make you weak. rest now, get your revenge when you're healed. "  — sawada keizaburo, attempting to comfort his best friend after being unsure of whether her unborn child will survive due to being forced to fight in the kengan annihilation matches despite her condition.

" you still haven't figured it out yet, 'omi? you cannot love both of us and act like it's fine and dandy. fucking pick or i'll kill him right now.  "  —  ohma tokita confronting kyomi after finding out that she's been sharing a bed with Ichiro Nakata as well as him, ready to kill the supposed 'superman'.

   age   . .   kyomi is is twenty years of age

   gender   . .   she was born of the female gender.

   height/weight   . .   she stands at 5'2'' while weighing 155lbs of pure muscle.

   appearance   . .    " oh, but that's the irony, broken people like her are not fragile. "

                                                         

  

   kengan match records   . .   46 wins, 0 loses.

   physical scent   . .   kyomi's natural scent is one of the saltwater and sandalwood, with hints of plumeria flower.

   sexual orientation   . .  she is bisexual, biromantic.

   marital status   . .   currently not married.

   

 

  " i can't believe your sweet-tempered father was reincarnated into that girl. she's tough as nails. "

   occupation   . .   kengan fighter, personal body guard / assassin, head of the ka'uhane clan with the inherited abilities of her ancestors. *

   personality type   . .   enfj-t  —  the protagonist.

   [   positive   ]

‣  motivational, inspirational; bring out the best in others

‣  very perceptive about people's thoughts and motives 

‣  fun to be with - lively sense of humor, dramatic, energetic, optimistic

‣  strive for "win-win" situation  

‣  loyal and committed

‣  warmly affectionate and affirming

   [   negative   ]

‣  tendency to be smothering and over-protective/manipulative and controlling

‣  doesn't pay enough attention to her own needs 

‣  critical of opinions and attitudes which don't match her own/sometimes unaware of social appropriateness or protocol

‣  extremely sensitive to conflict, with a tendency to sweep things under the rug as an avoidance tactic/blames herself when things go wrong, and not give themselves credit when things go right  

‣  her sharply defined value systems make her unbending in some areas/she may be so attuned to what is socially accepted or expected that she's unable to assess whether something is "right" or "wrong" outside of what her social circle expects

   personality description   . .   ❛   part of her mystery is how she is calm in the storm and anxious in the quiet.  ❜

         ‣  kyomi is a typically bright, energetic and friendly individual, radiating warmth and acceptance to all those who come in contact with her. her kindness is talked of in abundance with her people, as well as her humor that can at times have the entire tribe rolling about with laughter. exceptionally considerate of others feelings, she will often force hers down to where she no longer has to deal with them so she can focus on the tasks/needs of others at hand. despite all of this, she is a skilled warrior who’s talents outshine those who are double her age and trained every moment of the time, leading to her confidence in her abilities to border on cocky. with these abilities however, she is able to defend her tribe and grow an ever expanding bodyguard service from those she’s trained, hiring them out to the highest bidder with these skills. her intelligence is what helped her launch the idea, her mistrust and misjudgement will end up being her downfall; getting her into situations where she’s forced to be the compeditor for Omni Air International, who threatened to level her village if she didn’t comply. over her family and fellow villagers she is fiercely protective and thoughtful, willing to lay down her life if need be for them so they could continue to live in peace. aside from that, she at times can be extremely angry and resentful of the hand she had been dealt, knowing that it was beyond her control and that was what bothered her the most. in competition, she is a blood thirsty and calculating competitor, who would rather break necks than ask or answer any questions directed at her. when pushed to it, she will shut down the side that everyone knows and loves entirely, revealing a murdeous monster who would tear down anyone in her path. 

   likes   . .   relaxing in the sun, training, eating exotic and new foods, spending time with her twin children. 

  dislikes   . .   being told what to do/forced into situations where she has no control, arrogant people, disloyalty, early mornings.

   skills   . .   healing by meditation, knive throwing, rock/ice climbing, cooking, drawing/painting, ballet, hula dance. 

   any flaws   . .  she can be very critical of others with no real cause, her jealousy is out of control, she’s got a large scar on her back, left hip and left thigh from when she was attacked by a shark at the age of 12.

  personal phobias   . . deep bodies of water, dark spaces, being alone, 

  habits   . .  nail biting, smoking, constantly triple checking her surroundings, self isolation when feeling vulnerable.

   weapons   . .  seismic senescing through her hands and feet, pressure point and medical knowledge, garrote, knive throwing, judo, kenpo, jujitsu, grappling, wrestling.

   family or blood relatives   . .   —   akela ka’uhane  |  father, 39 years old  |  alive  |  intermediate chief along side his wife in his daughters absence/guardian of his grandchildren.

                                                 —   makani ka’uhane |  mother, 37 years old  |  alive  |   intermediate chieftess alongside her husband in her daughters absence/guardian of her granddaughter/healer

                                                 —   noe olina ka’uhane  |  daughter, 3 years old  |  alive  |  living with her grandparents while her mother is away, training in meditation and energy control with her grandfather.

                                                —-   kanoa haikili ka’uhane | son, 3 years old | alive | living with his grandparents while his mother is away, training in meditation and energy control with his grandfather. 

   affiliated company / empoleeyer   . .    omni air international 

    friends   . .  —  miyuki dotokayashi |  best friend | alive | daughter of naga dotokayashi, ceo of Omni air international  

                      — sawada keizaburo | best friend/unofficial bodyguard & uncle to her children | alive | kengan fighter/employed                             by murder music.

                      — wakatsuki takashi | best friend/father figure | alive | kengan fighter/empoyed by furumi pharmaceuticals.

                      — saw paing yoroizuka  | close friend | alive | kengan fighter/employed by village of the dawn.

                      — adam dudley | close friend | alive | kengan fighter/employed by boss burger.

                      — imai cosmo | close friend/brother figure | alive | kengan fighter / employed by nishihonji security services.

                      — okubo naoya | close friend/ex-lover | alive | kengan fighter.

                      — himuro ryo | close friend | alive | kengan fighter. 

                     —  kaneda suekichi | close friend | alive | kengan fighter.

                     —  gaolang wongsawat | close friend | alive | kengan fighter.

   romantic interest(s)   . .  ohma tokita & ichiro 'lihito' nakata  —  ❛  you’re selfish, is what you are. making us both love you and then refusing to choose, what the fuck is your game? ❜

        

          —  ohma 'the ashura' tokita : my, oh my. the relationship between ohma and kyomi began when they first encountered each other during her first trip to japan 2 years prior, representing Omni Air International and winning 27 consecutive matches before the annihilation tournament took place. they met in a coffee shop, he decided to stop in and devour whatever pastries they had on display for the day, and due to his large, intimidating frame, most people were afraid of him and kept his distance; not kyomi. she found his seemingly brooding and potentially aggressive nature comical in contrast to the sweet treats he was eating, so she being the outgoing individual she was, went up to him and asked him how the desserts tasted now that he'd robbed everyone else of the chance. her boldness and confidence in the way she carried herself was enough to catch his attention and intrigue, so he invited her to sit with him and try the remains of what he hadn't inhaled just yet. it was in that sit down, taste testing the different assortments that laid in front of them, that a bond was formed and only grew with the more time they spent together, finding more commonalities than initially suspected. as close as they got, there was still a wall put up between the two of them, set up unintentionally by both parties to refrain from either getting hurt. this didn't stop jealousy and possessiveness to overwhelm the 'relationship' that they had developed, resulting in it's momentary end in an explosive way. now, two months later, they met once again at the kengan annihilation tournament representing their respective companies, which was a shock to them both, especially on her end. the greatest shock for ohma was when the new 'superhuman' he had been introduced to a little while prior to this, was now following around his woman like a puppy, only sparking the killer instinct within him that lie just beneath the surface. that, and the hickies and love marks that covered her body in the most obvious and infuriating places. now aggressive and hostile toward the woman who somehow held a vice grip on his heart, he couldn't help but blame himself at the same time for allowing her to slip through his fingers, however he will be damned if he lets 'lihito' steal what's his. with kyomi seeming to decide that she was fine with loving the both of them, fucking the both of the, that was when he snapped and would become a much more outwardly angry person than his usual calm demeanor, lashing out at any person who happened to make the wrong comment in his presence. despite his feelings of rage and hostility toward the situation, he couldn't help the fact that he loved her, and he would continue to love her even if he hated the choices that she was making, and the fact that even though he knew her for two years time now, it still felt as though she was hiding a part of herself from him, which was frustrating for the fighter, because in their long nights together, he had spilled his guts to her, given her every part of him, and he was met with this. 

         —  ichiro ‘lihito’ nakata : meeting this goddess was a complete accident, one that ichiro was more grateful for than he cared to admit out loud- scratch that, he'd happily yell it from whatever roof top she requested. having met after he was observing his competition for the next few matches, he quickly took notice of the seemingly unbeatable 'pele', swiftly deciding two things: that she would soon be his, and he did not want to fight her in any upcoming matches, because he knew he would get his ass handed to him, and that wasn't something the self proclaimed superhuman could afford to his ego or image. after she mopped the floor with her opponent, he approached her and asked if she would like to get something to eat, explaining he knew just how strenuous and appetite increasing these matches could be, it didn't take much pressure to get her to agree. the two went to an authentic japanese ramen shop, as she had never been before and had only been in japan for a few days, which was mostly spent fighting or training, this being the first time she actually had a moment to herself to breath. they ate bowl after bowl, stacking the piles high as they could go before ichiro realized that this woman had not only stolen his heart, but emptied his wallet as well, not that he minded. her smile and full belly was all he cared about at that moment. over the next few months, the two became closer and closer, though there was weeks where she would pull away and disappear, for reasons he did not know of; come to find out much later, she was spending the other parts of her time with the infamous ohma tokita, his self decided rival in the kengan matches. this discovery once they had arrived at the tournament only fueled ichiro's rage and desire to win, to prove that he was the better man, the stronger man, the one for her. though the two decided amongst themselves that they would compete for her heart, they were infuriated to see that she decided that it was fine to simply love them both, which wouldn't have been too terrible for him if it wasn't for the fact that ohma made it abundantly clear that he wasn't okay with that, and would repeatedly threaten ichiro's life, which was met with the response of 'try it' every single time. the relationship that they have is a rather lax and easy going one, though at times he can be a bit smothering and over-protective, that's only because he doesn't want to lose out on what he sees as his one chance at happiness. 

   backstory   . .   kyomi was born the only child to a long line of renowned martial artists, one that had developed it's own style that included many aspects that weren't included in the traditional way of teaching. over 1500 years ago, her ancestors figured out how to manipulate matter and atoms, giving them partial manipulation over their surroundings as well as a physical power up. they also figured out the ability to heal themselves faster through the power of meditation, which came in handy for those who chose to be warriors, such as kyo.  the longer the line, the more ancestors that could be called upon for assistance in a fight, using their knowledge and own distinct styles of fighting, the stronger the power up, making kyomi at the time, the strongest ever of her line, surpassing that of her past life and previous tribal chief by what seemed like miles. from a young age, she displayed strong discipline and technique, mastering things thrown at her within a few days time and leaving her teachers in absolute awe, as well as her parents, though they also beamed with happiness. the ancestral spirit didn't manifest in every generation, it only happened when the current host dies, so it can be passed to the new one, which so happened to be a feisty, strong-willed and opinionated young woman who was more than willing to kill for her goals and those she cares for. at the age of 16, she made the mistake of getting too attached to a tourist visiting one of the vacation spots on the main parts of her island, resulting in her losing her virginity and discovering she was pregnant a few months later. with the support of her family and village, she had her children and would not have been able to handle it without the backing that she had. as chieftess in training, her father and mother handled most things for her while she focused on her own children, but also growing up still given she had them so young. it was during this time that it became apparent that she was suffering from post-partum-rage, which was honed and harnessed into a deadly weapon to add precision and greater force behind her strikes. at the age of 18, she was brought to omni air international headquarters by her best friend, being told that her father wanted someone strong to represent his company in what was known as the kengan matches in japan. this didn't appeal to her too much, initially she refused, but when her home and tribe were threatened with extinction, her own children who were innocent, she had no choice but to comply. her best friend had no knowledge of this, and was unable to stop her father from forcing her companions hand, but it was no use, he would not budge on his decision. she was the strongest by far that he had come across, and he wouldn't let her slip through his fingers when he had the power to bend her to his will, no matter the rage and resentment he was building within his fighter. after saying her goodbyes to her one and a half year olds, her parents and her village, she set off to japan, where she found it hard to adjust to the culture and the language, resulting in many fights and brawls due to misunderstandings. it was during this time that she met several people who would become close friends and mentors to her, the relationships forming due to their close proximity from the kengan matches, as they were all participants in some way or another. the romantic relationships she did not plan for, and being the privileged person that she was, assumed that she would just be able to have both of the people who had captured her heart, not taking their feelings into consideration whatsoever. this was a result of no one taking hers into consideration for bringing her there in the first place, forcing her to fight for the lives of her people and not being allowed to lose no matter what. she cared very little for what people viewed as 'fair', even if she did love them.  

extra   . .       —  kyomi is ambidextrous, though the punches from her left hand hurt far more than the ones from her right, she believes most of her past lives were prodominantly left handed, which she finds awesome as hell.

—  even after two years, the people closest to her, aside from sawada and wakatsuki, known nothing about her life back in hawaii, which is something that she prefers to keep due to her not knowing who she can truly trust anymore.  

—  though both ohma tokita and ichiro nakata have perminent places in her heart, if she was forced to choose, she would have to drop them both because she couldn't bear hurting one by choosing the other

—  sawada interestingly enough knew kyomi before she came to japan, having met her a few times when he and his employer made trips to hawaii to open new stores there for murder music, as he was her body guard as well as fighter. the two clicked while she was pregnant, he was very kind and thoughtful when interacting with her, never once judged her and was there when her twins were born. he's a brother that she never had, acting as her protector and best friend all at the same time; the relationship she has with lihito makes him sick to his stomach but it's her life, and he refuses to say anything for fear of getting his face kicked in.

—  she and raian have an unspoken rivalry, due to them both having destructive power, and her being referred to as 'the devil's match'. kyomi finds his blood lust entertaining and would love to fight him, him feeling the same with her, but having a bordering obsession with her as well, having to keep constant tabs on her and be aware of where she is at all times, something he does his best to keep hidden from everyone, including those in the kure clan. If anyone is going to beat her for good it would be him.

[tartarusdwelt-a]

five times kissed / tankswap meeeee 👉👈

five times kissed // accepting | @disaeric​ In which I completely forsake my regular formatting because this got TOO LONG.

i. you dare to goad the consequence, it devours you.                                                                                   ul’dah, the golden city.

THERE WAS A GIRL ON EITHER ARM — colour her unsurprised. They fluttered in like butterflies, like moths to a flame, and he burned so brightly. Pretty things with pastel dresses and bright eyes; in their whispers and drab flirtations she found herself watching, an alienation that bothered her only when she paused to consider it.

Not of a desire for him. No, no, that would be ludicrous. But that he should be desired and desire in turn — that his waking moments should be defined by the want that another person held for him. She did not know the sensation, nor the touch. A feral, mangy, disgusting thing; she was defined by the word of others, and held their assessments of her in cruel regard.

“aye, who should want you? fucking idiot girl, y’not worth the food I put into your mouth.”

“You know it’s rude to stare.” His tankard of ale clinks against the bar top, and she jumped at the sound. Amber eyes met golden brown, unabashedly unafraid at how she glared, and he grinned.

“I am trying to drink in peace,” she answered, her expression worsening at how he laughed, “Not watch you tongue fuck every available woman in the room —”

"Are you jealous, Koret?” She hated the arrogance in his voice, how it managed to burn colour to her cheeks without conscious thought. In a fool’s attempt, she brought her ale to her lips and hoped it would hide her expression; only to near choke on his next words. “I could kiss you if you want.”

There was a pause. She lowered her drink, smoothed her fingers against the lacquered wood, and turned to look at him only when she was sure she wasn’t pink. “I could think of nothing worse.”

“You wound me,” he answered, though she knew her words inflicted no injury. If anything they were an invitation; a test to see if her bark had any bite. Foolish; he should have known a creature raised on harm would fall to a gentle hand. They found stiffness, but not resistance, and the red of her hair tumbled like blood over his fingers as he drew a soft ascent from her jaw to her cheekbone. He held her — tender, despite his previous teasing — and when he brought his lips to meet hers they were not intense, but gentle. Nothing like she’d seen when he’d kissed the others. She told herself that was what made it worse.

A hand on his collarbone. Her fingers in divot. She pushed him back, incredulous at her own weakness, and embarrassed she let herself entertain the notion. “Stop, go kiss the tavern girls!” she snarled, the back of her palm pressing to the skin of her bottom lip.

He was radiant. She wanted to kiss him again.

ii. there is a poltergeist in your veins, it wants to watch you burn.                                                                                            the castrum, alight.

TWISTED, METALIC ASH FELL LIKE SNOW against her hair, blistering exposed skin as Garlean engineering groaned and melted in the fires wrought by great Ultima. The pain, however, was secondary. There was an animal in place of a girl; an instinct; a desperate claw for life as the inferno wreathed its way down the narrow passage and the cool night air felt distant as oxygen was sucked from the tunnel. Yet even still she carried on; one hand on his back, the other on the control stick, and it was all she could do to push the magitek forward out of that forsaken place.

Thancred — how stupid she was to miss the signs. Lifeless, his body draped over Maggie as they ran, and unlike her as she coughed and spluttered he uttered not a peep. That fact was more frightening than the fire; greater than the ascian she tore from his body: the truth that she had missed the signs, and it might cost him entirely.

Her scream ripped through the air as they burst free, fire spewing behind them like dragon’s breath, and a sudden turn sent them both tumbling from Maggie’s back. Kor landed hard on the wet earth, tasting blood in her mouth and feeling the gashes in her bottom lip. She struggled to push herself up, to drag her body to his even when she could see the blurred vision of her companions and hear them yell at her that she was safe.

“No, he —” Her throat was burning, her voice cracked and horse. He had not moved from the place that he had fallen, splayed a marionette flung by a ruthless child. She reached for him with muddied hands, smearing dirt across his face, and pressed her forehead against his.

Please do not be dead. Please do not be dead. I cannot bear to lose anyone else. Please don’t be dead.

The tickle of breath against her hair. Shallow, barely there, but he was alive. A gasp of relief — a laugh. Without even thinking she leaned up and kissed his forehead, caring not for the bloodstain that remained.

iii. ours are the bodies of graveyards, our hearts a mausoleum.                                                                                            dravania, in grief.

THE SUN. She was the sun. Her gentle light a comfort; her warmth a welcomed friend. How deep the shadows ran when she departed — how cold was the world was in her absence. It reflected in her guardian. It cheated the mirth from behind his eyes and stole the revelry from his teeth. He stared ahead with catatonic dullness, his thoughts a tempest of what if’s and if only, and the dark circles and weighted shoulders were an unintended weakness to the reality of his grief.

Which was worse — the mirror or the reflection? That she should stare into a reality she knew all too well, or that she had once projected it? Grief was intruder who slipped past her doors and made a home at her table; he had stolen her innocence and took more than a pound of flesh. It defined her, the loss of her sister. She could only imagine how Minfilia’s would define him.

Without much thought she came to sit beside him, not minding that he didn’t pause to look. The fire, as it crackled and twirled on charred logs, was a good enough distraction — she was familiar with the disassociation. To speak was to admit. To act was to give in. There was violence in the vulnerability. She knew, she knew.

Her head lay gently against his shoulder, feeling it a pitiful comfort. Yet he reached for her all the same, his hand resting on the top of her head, and they sat in the quiet for a time.

“Thancred.” When she spoke her voice was quiet, thick with an emotion she didn’t fully understand, and when she finally looked up at him she wasn’t even sure what she should say. I’m sorry. I know. It never gets easier. I wanted to die, too. It will live in you — poison you.

Instead, with lips slightly parted and the flutter of her hand against the back of his neck, she leaned in to kiss him. A foolish distraction, one she full expected him to reject, but he did not. His lips moved against hers, his tongue a delving dance, and as he twisted himself to meet her the hand that pressed itself to the small of her back cradled her as he gently lowered her to the grass.

iv. they play requiems in your honour; it is an insult.                                                                                the rising stones, alone.

SHE HATED THE FLOWERS PLACED BY HIS BED. Dead — he wasn’t fucking dead — but it was as if they had left him to die. Their scent was a mockery; their withering blooms a reminder of the time that ticked idly by while he lay unmoving beneath the oil lanterns of the Scion’s headquarters. Though he breathed he did not wake, and the smooth lines on his face did little to soothe her knowing his last expression was of agony.

Gone. He was gone. Dead, but not gone. How was she supposed to rationalise that? If he were dead at least there would be a funeral, but the flowers that wreathed him shed petals in the coffin of his bed. It was absurd. She picked one from his cheek and let it flutter to the floor.

“Come back to me,” she pleaded. But like every time her voice did not reach, nor did her actions have any effect. She took his hand, curled his fingers around her own, and pressed them to her mouth. “I love you. Please, please come back.”

He was silent. 

She did not expect anything less. 

Choking back her own despair, she willed herself the gentleness to lower his hand before the anger exploded.

The vase shattered into a thousand pieces against the wall. Wet hands pressed themselves to her cheekbones, hoping the pain would stop her grief, but it ripped itself from her lungs all the same. 

She fell to her knees.

v. golden, she burns like atoms. you cannot protect her.                                                                                     the first, sacrosanct.

AH, SO THIS IS HOW SHE WOULD DIE. Not by her own hand, but the light. In holy radiance she would be purified from the inside out. Incinerating her, she would become beautiful and clean.

It burned. Gods, it burned.

She didn’t realise she was screaming until his hands were steady on her shoulders, uttering soothing placations she knew neither of them believed. Five years on his side had changed the man she knew, but even in the depths of his weariness the familiarity remained. He was a fixture; her fingers wrapped around his arms an anchor; and even as she choked and vomited the burning light he did not peel himself from her side.

“It hurts, it hurts.” Kor didn’t mean to sound so vulnerable — so small. She was the Warrior of Darkness, she could not show weakness. But it poured from her like a fount and dripped off her skin like holy water, and as she cried he kissed her head and kept her steady in her fight.

“I’ve got you,” he assured, even know she knew neither of them believed it. Even if it wasn’t enough. “You’re going to be okay. I’ve got you.”

[vampiresuns]

About J.C.

Picrew: top, middle, bottom

“The travelling legal scholar with an argument for anything, and a past they won’t talk about.”

Full name: Julianus Cleopatra Sanlaurento, for the drama of it.

Nicknames: Jules, JC, Sanlaurento/Sanlau

Age: 27

Birthday: November 11th

Gender: No 💖 / Whatever Howl Pendragon has going on. They/Them

Orientation: Bisexual

Favourite drink: Iced coffee

Favourite food: Also coffee

Favourite flower: Hydrangeas

Zodiac: Scorpio sun, Libra moon, Pisces rising

Patron Arcana: Strength

Upright: inner strength, bravery, compassion, focus

Reversed: self doubt, weakness, insecurity

Languages spoken: Spanish*, Vesuvian, conversational Venterrean, and about 17 different lose phrases in a bunch of assorted languages, with no systematisation whatsoever.

Appearance:

Light tan skin, with freckles across the nose and the cheeks, which expand over the lips after being exposed under the sun for too long. Has several beauty marks on their face too.

Bleached blond hair with slight waves, falls to their mid-back. They usually keep it in a messy, half-assed bun, or a loose French braid when they’re at sea.

Naturally defined arched eyebrows. They know the power they hold.

Dark brown eyes, almost black.

5′2 or 5′3, the jury is still out on it, and they change it constantly because they don’t know.

Has a tattoo that says ‘être libre’ on an undisclosed location, and a tattoo of poppies on their right ankle. This tattoo shrinks or grows on its own volition.

Hobbies: Writing (poetry), collecting books and notebooks, dancing, travelling, being right, sailing and literary studies and calligraphy. Generally, studying and learning count as hobbies, but they never admit it aloud.

Magical abilities: Mostly practical magic that they have taught themselves through the years.

However, there’s some occurrences that follow them — like manifestations, dreams, their tattoo growing or shrinking on its own will, or sometimes being followed by butterflies their familiar/companion Marcius likes to haunt — that they cannot pin a cause to, let alone explain, and it bothers them to a minor degree.

If you ask them, they will say their analytical capacity is also a magical ability, but they don’t actually believe it is.

LI: They have their eyes set on @apprenticealec​‘s Saoirse.

Shippable: Yes.

Personality/Trivia:

Clever, analytical, compassionate, strong-willed, mysterious and passionate, Jules used to pursue legal and jurisprudential studies. A lawyer by trade, they dropped the traditional line of work after a fallout with their family.

They rarely speak of their past directly. While they do speak of their experiences openly if the situation arises, the specifics of where they come from is something they keep to themselves.

Their familiar/companion is an orange creamicle cat called Marcius. He’s loud, affectionate and stupid.

Will zone out on tasks that interest them until every detail is thorough, perfect and balanced out. Will dig into things until the bottom of their depths.

Has a small beach cabin near Nopal which used to belong to their family, but it was left abandoned and they made their own. They’re currently saving money to buy a Sailboat and name it The Golden Vanity after their favourite sea shanty.

For someone who likes to be home so much, they travel a lot, mostly studying, chasing books, following scholarly circles and lectures and offering legal help. They do not do court-work.

Currently you can find them trying to negotiate with Pirate Queen Meredith so she lets them stay on ship — they got on her ship by accident (had to get on another ship that was going to the same place) and realised a little too late. Basically a stowaway.

Short-sighted, also has astigmatism.

Knows basic fencing, and eventually learns how to use a crossbow.

Trinkets:

A set of dangling earrings, they seem to be finely made.

Smoky quartz sunglasses, they seem to be prescription.

A toy of a bear, it has a red hat, a blue coat and red shoes.

A leather bound copy of the Pirate Code, it seems to be entirely transcribed by hand and it’s full of margin notes.

You can find their playlist here.

[sanstropfremir]

it’s the episode 8 review!!! how many episodes is this show supposed to even be?

the stages from the episode feel like such a grab bag.... i still don’t understand why they didn’t put all the skill stages together, and then did the normal two episodes of the third round. i guess it makes sense that they didn’t want to have six stages in one episode and then three in the other two, but eh. 

feeling kinda average on these as a whole, there’s a lot of good elements going on here but probably because of my own preferences (i don’t listen to ballads or blackpink) none of them really hit all the buttons. hopefully this will be a shorter review because i'm only going to do a quick rundown of the vocal stages; i dont really have that much to say about them because they are (intentionally) not very stage picture focused. i'll do the normal stage breakdowns for the other two though, even though i won’t rank them because we still need to see the other four!

vocal stages

sf9 + tbz + ikon

not much to say here other than wow, that’s RED. glad to see some more specific use of spotlighting and i always love when they light things on fire. i do wish they had fill lit with a brighter amber so we could actually get a bit more detail on their faces, especially because there’s six of them. i appreciated the simple blocking and only using one of the ‘stages,’ this stage didn’t need to be anything complicated and it wasn’t. i don’t love spinning camera shots because they make me a bit ill, and i'll forgive the constant cutting because it's a vocal stage and there isn’t any other real movement that we should be paying attention to. not my favourite of the two, i found it visually a bit too repetitive and complex at the same time. always love a crushed velvet suit though, so bonus points for that.

atz + skz + btob

i was braced for the worst and i dont know what kind of miracle happened but it was listenable! like i said, not a ballad fan but i could listen to eunkwang all day. i love a good plinth for a ballad stage, they’re one of my favourite devices in kpop design and i especially love it with a good groundlevel fog. glad they kept it black and white for the first half of the stage, it was in line with the blooming flower projections, and it made a very clear colour arc. they kept the visuals clean and simple with very little blocking at all, a very smart choice for this stage. not sure why they decided it would be the chanel time stage, which i disapprove of because i don’t like chanel, but i do love eunkwang’s shirt with the cameo buttons and the massive turnback cuffs, very 17th and also 19th century. i know they never do it because they dont read on stage normally but yes absolutely more thin chain pendant chokers on men, thank you! i also liked that there was emphasis on a more traditional lighting scheme, there weren't any crazy concert effects, just some good directional beam spotlights and the rear stacks in the climax. 

third round stages

ikon

costume

the first look for them is definitely my fabourite of theirs so far. there’s enough variation in the jackets that the base layer of tshirt and jeans don’t look too repetitive. and i do love a good statement jacket. my favourite is probably donghyuk’s because i'm a sucker for fringe always.

i don’t like the backup dancers costumes, but given the way i’ve reacted to every other all black outfit for this entire show i don’t think anyone was surprised about that. these ones particularly irk me because they’re very matte; there's pretty much no texture or pattern differentials to define the shape of the limb, which makes them disappear when theyre all grouped together (mostly on the women). i think they probably were intending to make a statement/emphasis on the hands because of the sleeve cutoff point, but there were so many arm movements that were just totally missed because the costumes were just black voids. most egregious parts are here, with the female dancers up center. i can barely tell what the movements are unless i’m paying specific attention to them because there's so many black shapes. maybe it was the point for it to be an indiscernable writhing mass, but it wasn’t my vibe.

don’t love this styling on lisa. i hate peeptoe shoes in general but peeptoe boots are the worst offenders. they make you look like you have duck feet, no matter who you are. especially with a flat cutout like that. a universally unflattering shoe, and i would know, i worked in a shoe store for two years. this whole look is just pg-13 rihanna cfda awards 2014 and really nobody should try to run up against rihanna.

also i have to mention this because it’s actually really bothering me, but lisa’s backup dancers are serving very allgemeine ss looks and i do not like it. generally when we see ‘military’ uniforms in kpop theyre usually modelled off older styles (pre wwii) of western uniforms that usually aren’t in circulation, and they’re usually non-matching and embellished in ways that are deliberately not military. i know logically that it's a budget constraint+they’re backup dancers+current trend thing but the clean lines with only button detailing and the all black and that specific harness shape? it hit my brain the wrong way. i mean, technically those uniforms are designer because hugo boss did them, but the uh..... girlboss move didn’t land for me.

this is my PERSONAL OPINION please for the love of all that is holy do not come yelling at me about this. it’s all under a cut, you chose to read the post.

set

very glad to see some busy kitschy sets! this is a massive build, since there’s essentially three full sets here: the temple, the jungle, and the first tiny room. and all of them are very heavily decorated. 

the starting room is just five walls on casters (wheels), that have been set into place with the cameraman and ikon inside at the start, and then once they exit the walls can be easily struck and rolled off set. simple, smart, and convenient!

i missed it the first couple times around but glitching out the projections in the temple for a split second was a neat little trick.

the silver and polygonal nature of the tiger/panther/cat(?) head is a bit disconnected from the gold and the aesthetic of the rest of the stage for me. the difference between the original room set and the jungle tracks, but the cat head isnt able to make the same leap for me. i'm also not a fan of mixing metals so maybe that’s why.

the tiger/panther/cat(?) head is a fun physical transitional device; i'm a big fan of tunnels and small transitory spaces like that and if they’re well dressed like this one they do so much for establishing place and mood.

i'm very sure i’ve seen this style of polygonal animal head with laser eyes before....i cannot for the life of me remember where or for what. i know wang yibo did a panther stage for sdc3 that had a human formation panther with green laser eyes, i wonder if i'm just crossing wires.

OH nevermind it’s because it looks like the witcher medallion. wires were definitely crossed.

lighting

using purple/teal lighting for the jungle was a smart choice because purple is the direct compliment to the gold and also is much more flattering on humans than green. green is one of the colours that humans can see the most variations in, so when something is green when it's not supposed to be (like human skin), we register that very quickly and associate it with unease and sickness. you know how old fluorescent lights have that greenish tinge that kinda makes you feel ill? it's your cone cells and your brain recognizing that you’re looking at things that are not supposed to be green.

very clean colour arc, i love to see it.

sound

it’s.....fine? i don’t listen to blackpink and have no opinions on their music other than it's not my type. i dont really know what the thematic connection to the visuals is, which is not strictly necessary in a lot of cases, but i don’t particularly care for the conflation of ‘savage’ and a (presumably) precolonial religion that’s assembled from stereotypes of real colonized cultures. you can come at me about how ‘it's not that deep’ all you want but i am here specifically doing an in depth analysis, and i gotta point it out. i'm not here to pass judgement on you if you didn’t realize or don’t care or whatever, i'm just saying that it's important to consume content with a critical eye. what you do with that information is your own personal choice, but you should be aware of it at least. 

staging

they took a big risk eating popcorn right before singing, and we definitely got some residual mouth noises of them trying to clean out their teeth. eating on stage is difficult in general because you have to make sure it's not going to dry out the performers mouths, because they dont have access to water and it takes WAY longer to chew and swallow something than you would expect. there’s a LOT of testing that goes into making stage food and guaranteed it’s not made out of what it looks like or what its supposed to be; i worked on a production of amadeus were we did literal weeks of testing amalgams of different desserts to make sure that salieri could actually eat the ones onstage without totally drying him out, because fun fact about that show, salieri doesnt leave stage like, at all, so there was no way to get him water. poor bloke.

i thought the blocking of this was really smart. the long take from the ‘normal’ room and transition into the jungle was super slick, even if that weird circle the camera did while pointed up at the ceiling was unnecessary and pointless.

bobby’s ‘acting’ was extremely funny and that’s the only way people are allowed to act surprised now. edvard munsch scream style only.

the pacing is a bit off and this time it wasn’t mnet’s editing that fucked it up. as fun as it is to have a feature, clearly she wasn’t allowed within proximity of the rest of them for covid or other yg related reasons, but it made for some extremely long transitions, especially the one out of her verse. it kills the momentum of the stage in that beat, even though they manage to pick it up after.

this is a very simple little narrative arc that’s easy to follow and doesn’t require any extra explaining. which is exactly the kind of arc that groups should be doing at this stage in the game. this is a good formic step up for ikon!

i thought the turning off of the monitor at the end was fun and a good callback to them watching the videos at the beginning of the stage. a nice clean way to make it circular.

skz

costume

FINALLY something different on the skz boys! these were mostly fun eboy looks for them, and i like it on the basis that it's not the same as the last set of costumes.

bang chan out there with his thigh OUT and a (fake) bridge piercing? LOVE to see it. great work.

(copy-paste every thing i’ve said about backup dancers wearing all black)

the backup dancers that were dressed as bystanders/extras were great! they should have kept that with all of them because it would have given a little more shape to the choreography and establishing what function the backup dancers were supposed to have.

set

that is meant to be a giant rice cooker on stage, right? i think so because it's a god’s menu mashup? if that's not a rice cooker i have NO idea what its supposed to be

there’s only two large setpieces here, which was a smart way to go. i LOVE the subway car doubling as the truck, even if the truck itself makes no narrative sense. what a fun way to double the use of a single big piece. you’ll be able to see the way it moves in the full cam but it splits down the centre and there entrance doors at the back with attached stairs that bang chan and the dancers use to climb up.

lighting

not a whole lot happening here. i like the cool white leds in the subway car and the contrast with the more warm tones of the outside, which is good atmospheric establishment, but i can't discern a visible arc. 

not a fan of these projections; they’re in line with what we’ve seen from skz so far, which is: extremely literal. i dont think they’re that distracting, but they’re not to my personal taste. they really should have kept the comic panel theme that they did for changbin’s first verse, because that was inventive and fun to watch! and a great atmospheric indicator! i would love to see a bit more experimental projection use but it's hard when they don’t have a lot of time to build these stages and the lighting team is definitely working remotely.

sound

i love that they made the choice to do some actual talking, it’s a good gimmick and it works for the deadpool/comic book/fourth wall break theme, but australian accents take me the fuck out i am so sorry i cannot listen to either felix or bang chan speak english without laughing uncontrollably. 

i don’t like this arrangement but i'm not surprised about that, given my predilections. i'm also tired of skz shouting STRAY KIDS in every performance they do. i know on music shows it's probably more relevant and yea producers tags are a thing but we’ve been watching this show for nearly two months at this point. we know who you are, you can stop yelling. be more creative with it!

staging

my biggest issue with this stage is that it doesn’t have a payoff. there is an arc here: they’re stealing the truck, but why are they stealing the truck? who are they stealing it from? who are they fighting against? it's kind of important in a stage where the theme is stealing and fighting someone that you tell us who that is. in both of ateez’s previous stages were they were both stealing (rhythm ta) and fighting (wonderland), they made sure to show us who the villain was. there needs to be tension for a big blowup climax to actually pay off. whether it be against a a balloon arm kraken or a fascist government. this stage could have reached that next step if they’d just done a little bit more exposition. 

there were a lot of fun choreo moments here, and this is probably my favourite choreo of theirs so far. i thought the whole first bit in the subway car was excellent and a very fun play on those viral videos that we used to see roll around every so often of dancers doing routines in subway cars.

did it need the guns? not in the slightest. more on this point later. i could talk more about weapons and weight here, but i’ve done that several times already.

like with the tbz game of thrones stages, theyre relying a little too much on the audience's preconceptions of the source material in order to carry the theme. the guns are there because deadpool likes guns, but they don’t actually use the guns for anything? the most we get of the stealing segment is felix and the safe, which admittedly is a great bit with him leaping over and under the ‘laser’ lines (theyre likely led strips). because comic books are by nature procedural and deeply tied to narrative, it's unsatisfying when there’s no tension and no payoff.

HOW did we manage to get two stages that are blackpink covers with remote/tv static gimmick and durags? i know the slot machine of kpop tropes is not very big but surely the probability of hitting triple sevens on this one was pretty low. i’m pretty meh on both of these stages overall. skz was unsatisfying but i loved the choreo in the subway bit so that bumped it up a little ahead of ikon’s in my personal preferences, but i'm reserving my actual rankings for next week. assuming we get the other four stages next week and they dont do something stupid and only show two. which they very well might. i’ve stopped trying to understand why mnet does things the way that they do. 

as always the ask box is open, drop your comments/questions/personal opinions, i love to hear ‘em! but don’t be rude just because some of this is touchier subject material.

[saygeko]

𝐀 𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐃 𝐀𝐖𝐀𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆

Over 400 years ago The Fae Realm

"Do not move." Sayge chuckled at the scold while sitting on the polished floor. "I will cut your eyelashes if you continue blinking, close your eyes." The features of her aunt faded into the darkness as she finally closed them the way she was told to. The sharp sound was all she focused on, the scissors chopping off the extra length that had bothered her for the last few weeks, poking her eyes every time and blocking her sight. Sayge would brush the annoyance to her temples, not bothered by the untidy look it added to her appearance. The steady hands of her aunt Jioka told a different story. The disorderly of the locks were unacceptable, she had to get rid of the chaos and bring the straight line above her niece's deep ponds she had for eyes. The hold of the elder's breath showed the importance of the matter.

"Have you heard? Neave brought shame to her clan after running away up to the mountains." The younger Fae hummed in agreement, not forgetting the past order given to her, and not a muscle moved. "Silly girl. Her mother cried for the shine of one full moon night, the next sunrise, Neave disappeared from their books. Her name, shall no one mention again." Sayge lips pursed slightly, and the mental reprimand prevented her from any other reaction. 

The last piece of hair was cut, and the silver scissors withdrawn from her face. Jioka permitted her to open the eyes again, and Sayge kept them low. "Rise your gaze, child." The freshly cut fringe helping her to hide the secret her eyes could naively share and not give a chance to deny it after.

"I have said rise your eyes, Sayge." Jioka's voice went one tone higher. She was her father's younger sister, the second child, known for her neatness, her love for knives, and an impeccable perception, Jioka could read into anyone. Unsure, Sayge lifted her gaze but avoided Jioka's, this upsetting the latter. The loud noise of metal slammed against wood startled Sayge and the small birds drinking from the running water of her aunt's fountain. The Fae wished she could fly away with them. "Speak. Do you know something else about Neave's escape?" It felt like all air left Sayge's lungs at once, but a thin amount let her made a sound.

"I..."

Neave was the youngest child of her mother's third mate. The clan of Zasa. Born one season after Sayge, with a beautiful smile and the head lost in the clouds, with no real interest in cultivation and only using her magic for the simple reasons, a Fae who was closer to nature than anyone, or so she claimed to be. A child of the forest.

"Sayge! Here!" The younger Fae in the water waved her arm in the direction of where Sayge sat on the thick root of a tree. Not bothered to jump into the lake yet. The cool wind and the shade were enough to keep her from the heat of the spring day. 

"I will swim when I wish to, not when commanded." She heard the loud laugh of the girl in response to her turn down. A splash of water made it rain over her. That afternoon Sayge had planned to cultivate with her cousins who were ahead of her in their magic. Her desire to unlock stages of her magic she still couldn't, pulled her from bed every morning. Little time she left for distractions, and when she did (more often than she liked to admit,) she would rather spend it with someone else, not with the loud girl. 

"Sweetheart, the water is lovely. Who are you trying to trick? Uh? You cannot lie to me. You love water, just like fish do." Naeve smiled, the widest smile Sayge had seen in her life, even her back molars were visible to anyone who took a look. 

"The one tricking the other here is you. You dragged me to the lake, wishing to share a secret with me, and all I have heard is nonsense. Quick, share now, or let me go back." She spoke in annoyance and laid back on the greenish trunk. Naeve's insistence that morning as early as the sky had a hint of light blue convinced Sayge to skip her cultivation for half a day.

"Oh dear, you have no idea! Not even a clue! I am in love." She let out her feelings and extended her arms to the sides, allowing the water to get a hold of her weight, her bright smile never leaving her innocent face. "I met him up the mountains the other day." Turning her head to Sayge, she gifted the other one more smile. "Love. You know about it, right? I know you do." Naeve pushed slightly further, waiting for a confirmation from her friend.

Sayge knew what Naeve was trying to hint into, and she rolled her eyes, admitting to it or not, would not take her back home sooner. "Up the mountains? That is so far away from here. Is he not from—?" In an instant, she came to the realization, and Sayge's mouth opened in disbelief. "Naeve, who is this creature you have fallen in love with?"

"He is a Harpy." She shared with a shy smile while still keeping her eyes up to the clouds. "I've been seeing him. He says he loves me too. We would get high up his Chichibu Birch tree to take off and fly to the sky. His Chichibu tree is the only remaining one in the realm, in all realms." She sighed in content, only to speak again. "He whispers sweet words to my ear, and the touch of his feathers makes me tickle." As if all the laughter shared so far was not enough, Naeve shared one more. She lifted her head from the water and looked up at Sayge, who looked at her with worry. 

If her friend had got lost in the forest and mingled with other species, it was nothing of her business. Sayge thought she should give Naeve a word of reason, but she did not, to hear stories of love from others was not the way her clan expected her to grow. "Does the Harpy think this love is good for you?" She asked, not really interested in the answer, but if she said nothing and brushed it off, there was no way she could go back to her cousins.

"He said I should let nature speak to me. To allow the wind to talk and find an answer to our situation where I feel safe." Naeve shook her head, and her soak hair moved along. "So I wait, I wait until I see him again, and wait for the forest to give an answer to my plea."

Sayge sat up, her whole body facing the girl in the water, legs hanging from the elevated root, almost touching the lake with her toes. "An answer from the forest..." She repeated and took a long breath, air filling her chest and letting her mind concentrate. Hands holding tightly from the tree, she extended one of her legs, her foot touching the water, closing her eyes, and Sayge tried to deliver the way she was taught, but so far had not accomplished. 

Eyes open, and everything was the same, the girl in the water and the one on the tree, nothing had changed. Sayge had the bitter aftertaste of failure in her mouth. She knew she should not be losing her time there instead of practicing with her clan. This one more proof of it.

"Oh, Sayge! Sayge!" The shouting of her name called her back to the lake, taking her away from her thoughts. "It's a leaf! From the Chichibu Birch!" Sayge looked down to her feet and saw it, the glistering magic coming from her. From the tip of her toes. She did it.

Synchronicity had bloomed in her. The way flowers bloom on the hottest day of spring.

"This is it! My path was revealed to me by the forest, by nature itself!" She girl swam her way to Sayge, who still sat perplexed in the root of the tree. She pulled of Sayge's leg and made her fall into the lake. Finally, in the water. "Come, my dear friend! I must go back home to prepare and then meet my Harpy." Sayge's arm was pulled, so harshly, it took her a moment to realize the water was up to her waist. 

Naeve's words spoke about going back home, and Sayge heard no more. She had hoped to come back for the longest time, and the magic still warming up her body felt better than the sun hitting the crown of her head.

Jioka let go of a loud laugh, soon stopped by the back of her hand. "I do not know if to scold you or if to pat your cheek, child."

In between Sayge's eyebrows laid regret and accomplishment, and she had a hard time trying to choose which one to embrace. Her hard work paid off, but her first encounter with one of her clan's abilities was tainted with the fall of another. 

"My wish was to..." She had no words. No excuses. She wanted to go back to her cultivation from the moment she saw the lake, and her hurry made synchronicity and bad luck to hold hands.

"Naeve took a decision. The leaf could have been any other, but she already had her mind fixed." Jioka picked up the scissors from the wooden table by them and stood up to walk away. "Beliefs create realities, my child." She said as her figure disappeared in the hall, leaving Sayge by herself, sitting on the floor with the trimmed hair of her bangs scattered on her lap.

Only a few days had passed, but Sayge already missed Naeve's laugh.

Synchronicity is defined as the occurrence of meaningful coincidences that seem to have no cause; that is, the coincidences are acausal. Explains a relationship between two events which could not be explained by cause and effect.

Sayge is the cause and effect, perceived by the other as meaningful coincidences. Mere luck.

[therainbowwillow]

https://therainbowwillow.tumblr.com/post/640901334281879552/therainbowwillow

Part 12. Yes. I will confidently state that this is part 12 of my “short” fanfic. GOD. WHY DO I DO THIS.

Premise/what’s up with everyone:

Hades heads for Olympus to bribe convince his brother, Zeus, to help him keep a hold on his kingdom. Thanatos heads for Olympus to get medical treatment for Hypnos’s concussion. Neither knows that the other is also going to be there. Orpheus sings and sings and sings. He tries to hide how disappointed he is by how awful he sounds. Smoke inhalation in Hadestown didn’t do him good. Eurydice and Hermes make sure he’s adequately drugged up enough not to notice the stab wound through his stomach. Hyacinthus is super excited to see his namesake flowers for the first time thanks to Orpheus’s springtime. Apollo resists going on any long spring walks after being shot through the ankle. Persephone cannot believe it’s really spring. Not too hot, not too cold, it’s a miracle! Dionysus enjoys getting drunk, but in the spring this time. Achilles and Patroclus wonder whether or not they’re going to be allowed to stay out of Hadestown.

Ps. My phone has decided to autocorrect ‘Orpheus’ to ‘AirPods’ now, rather than ‘Orange.’ This is not important, but I don’t think my phone likes his name very much.

———————————————

A week has passed since they’d arrived back home. Eurydice, for all the novelty the springtime has brought, hasn’t changed her routine since the day they’d arrived. Sitting beside her lover seems to her to be enough. The others spend most of their time enjoying the pleasantries of the world in bloom, but Eurydice had hardly leaves Orpheus’s bedside. Through the days, he sings and scribbles down notes.

The nights are harder. By sunset, she’s found, his pain medicine begins to wear off and Apollo gives him something stronger to sleep. Tonight, they’re trying to wean him off of the powerful medicine. His sleep has been restless already. Eurydice hasn’t closed her eyes.

She’s almost drifting into sleep when Orpheus wakes with a start. “Orpheus? You okay?”

His eyes well with tears. He clutches his chest and cries out, in fear or pain, Eurydice can’t tell. She considers running for Apollo, but she can’t bear to leave his side. “Orpheus, look at me.”

He won’t meet her eyes. Tears roll down his cheeks and he shakes with sobs. “Baby, what’s wrong?”

His lips move, but no sound comes out, save for his sobbing hiccups. She takes his hands. “Please look at me,” she pleads gently.

He tucks his head into his arms. “No... please...” he moans.

“Orpheus, can you tell me what’s wrong?” Much longer and she’ll have to leave him to wake Apollo.

She pulls him into her arms and lets him cry. “I... I wanna go home,” he whispers.

Her brow furrows. “You are home, lover.”

He shakes his head against her chest. “No... no.”

“This is home. You’re okay,” she reminds him.

He squeezes her hands, desperately. “No. No. No,” he repeats, over and over again. His tears soak Eurydice’s shirt.

“Can you tell me what’s happening?” She probes. He trembles against her and begins to cry harder. Eurydice lays him back in bed. He holds her wrists. “I’ll be right back. I won’t even leave the room,” she promises. He sinks against the pillows.

Eurydice finds a box of matches and strikes one. She holds it against her candle lantern. A little light might help her examine him. Orpheus lifts his head when the light touches his face. His lips part. He glances around, shivering with shock. “Orpheus?”

His breaths are quick and heavy. “E-Eurydice... I’m... I’m home,” he studders.

She sits at his side. “Yes. You’re home and I’m right here.”

“It... it was so dark,” he mumbles.

It dawns on her then. “It was dark! Did you think you were back... there?”

“I don’t know... it was just so dark...”

“I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t know.”

“I-it’s okay.” His voice breaks and he leans into her again.

“Is it better with the lantern?” He nods. “Okay. We’ll sleep with lights, Orpheus.”

He lays in her arms a moment, until she feels damp heat against her torso. She lays him back in bed at the sight of his blood.

His eyes widen. “Eurydice!” He begs.

She lifts his shirt to find his bandages soaked through. “It’s okay, love. You just put too much strain on it.” She presses his hand over the wound. “Keep pressure on it. Try not to move. I’m gonna go get bandages.”

“Okay,” he agrees. Eurydice finds a few rolls of bandages and returns to his side. She cuts away the bloodsoaked wrappings. “Eurydice,” he wimpers.

“Hang on, you’re okay.”

He squeezes her hand. “It hurts.”

“I know.” She unscrews the cap of a pill bottle and tips a flask of water against his lips. “Swallow.” He does. “Good. It’s okay, Orpheus. You’re fine.” She holds a wad of gauze against his stomach and pulls the blankets up around his shoulders.

He lays in silence until the bleeding stops. “I’m sorry,” he whispers.

“You don’t need to be sorry, my love. I’m sorry I didn’t light a candle sooner. We’ll keep the lights on, okay?”

He takes a deep breath. “Okay.”

———————————————

Hermes stokes the fire. Another letter. And another. And another. The words light up as if they don’t want to be burnt. He tosses a handful of twigs over the papers. They all say the same thing: ‘Hermes, you’ve been summoned to Olympus. King Zeus asks for your immediate presence.’

He opens another, glances over the words and tosses it into the flames. Only another stack or two to go. He considers just tossing them all to burn without opening. Still, he opens another, afraid of missing details. ‘Lord Hermes,’ it reads. He recognizes the handwriting but cannot place his finger on whose it is. Not the usual messages, written by cupbearer Ganymede when Hermes himself is unavailable. The letter continues: ‘I understand your predicament and I believe I must inform you of our own on Olympus. Your summons are not those of common matters, as I’m sure you have determined. I fear, however, that you were not told of the severity of your situation. Hades arrived at the gates of Olympus yesterday.’

Hermes freezes. Hades. On Olympus. He’s calling Zeus to his aid. ‘My father, Zeus, wishes to keep you in the dark so he will have you in his grasp the moment you arrive. Though I am not permitted to say so, you must not abide by your summons alone. You will be Zeus’s to do with as he pleases. Hades’s case is against Orpheus first, but his arguments are unconvincing. He provides no contracts or legally-binding terms the boy was meant to follow. It is his case against you that worries your friends here on Olympus. You broke every major agreement in your terms in helping mortals flee the underworld and hiding a shade’s contract, as Eurydice’s pact is no where to be found.’

‘Regardless, I side with you, not the King of the Dead. You may have been foolish to break your terms, but Lord Hades attempted to end a life out of sheer selfish desire, after claiming Orpheus could leave unharmed. Your case is stronger. I await your arrival. Bring with you Apollo, Persephone and Dionysus as well as the poet, Orpheus and his lover. The others may accompany you if you wish. Remember, you have allies on Olympus, myself included. Regards, Athena, Goddess of Wisdom & War.’

Hermes sinks back against his chair. He curses under his breath. Zeus has sided with Hades. He knows others will follow. Still, he has support. Demeter, certainly, would do anything to disrupt Hades’s goals. Hera will likely side against her husband out of spite. Artemis will join Apollo, if she bothers to show up at all. Aphrodite might defend Orpheus for the purity of his love of Eurydice. Ares, however, for all of his arguments with his father, seems predicated to choose the powerful side. Zeus, the King of the Gods has prospects. Regardless, he hopes Orpheus will harbor more support than prosecution. With Athena on their side, they have a chance.

Another envelope catches his eye. It is addressed to his name, in perfectly formed capital letters. He wishes he could throw it into the fire. Hades’s handwriting. He tears it open.

‘Hermes, I regretfully inform you that you have broken terms 1.1-1.3 of your contract, which state: The return of mortal souls to the overworld by your hand is prohibited. The aid in the return of mortal souls to the overworld is prohibited. Aid is defined by giving directions, supplies, or tools to any individual, mortal or divine. You have also broken terms 2.4-2.7, which state: Copies of important shade contracts will be delivered to Olympus in a timely matter, without interference. Other terms you have broken include: 5.5, which states: Insighting the overthrowing of the hierarchy of the underworld is prohibited. 6.1, which states: All contact with traitors to the underworld is prohibited. 7.3, which states: Removal of goods from the underworld without permission is prohibited.’ Hermes rolls his eyes. Orpheus had been wearing Hadestown-issued clothing.

‘7.4, which states: Delivering goods to the underworld without permission is prohibited.’ They’d brought food and drink for Orpheus and Hyacinthus. ‘2.8-2.9, which state: Release of underworld prisoners by your hand is prohibited. Aid in the release of underworld prisoners is prohibited. 3.1, which states: The return of shades to the Styx by any purposeful means is prohibited.’ Apollo’s killing shot on their aggressor. The letter continues on: ‘3.8, which states: Agression against any individual under Lord Hades’s power is prohibited.’ More charges are listed. It seems Hades wants to use everything he has to argue his guilt.

‘Due to the aforementioned breaches of contract, your employment under Lord Hades has been permanently terminated. Lord Zeus has been granted jurisdiction to decide your punishment.’ Hermes sighs. The last man to recieve Zeus’s wrath thanks to Hades was Asclepius. The poor son of Apollo had been repeatedly struck by lightning until his heart stopped. He shudders at the thought. Even if he could take it, Orpheus most certainly couldn’t.

The letter finishes with the charges against Hermes’s son: Insighting revolution against Hades, freeing shades from the underworld, insighting riots causing property damage, manipulation against the king, and breaking the terms of a verbal agreement. Hermes almost laughs at how pathetic the accusations are. Entering Hadestown is no legal contract. Orpheus hadn’t had rules to break. His agreement was to leave without singing, which he hadn’t broken, according to Eurydice. If he’d sing in his cell, the terms had been nullified by his assumed death. Hades has nothing.

Nothing on Orpheus, that is. Hermes knows his own punishment will be brought against Orpheus, rather than himself. If Hades wants to hurt him, Hades knows Orpheus’s suffering is the way to do so, especially now. They have to win, for Orpheus’s sake.

[abloomntime]

A Bloom In Time Ch12 Dealing With The Past

Poppy's eyes widened when the giant snake like creature turned around in the opposite direction and began to float off somewhere still looking at her with that scowl. He was-....Sure something else wasn't he? She'd never seen anything like this before. Was he a swamp monster? Could be, she'd never been in a swamp before and didn't know what was hiding in it and she hadn't heard much stories about monsters except for the typical monster under your bed kind, and she still felt a pit of dread in her stomach harder than a rock when his gaze didn't budge from her face. It was almost like he was both suspicious and cautious in his movements as he held her up and away from her like someone who had to carry something but definately didn't enjoy doing so.

".......How do you know her?," he asked finally breaking the silence.

She flinched and blinked at the sudden question and all she could ask was, "W-what?"

"I SAID how did you meet the girl?"

"I-I-....S-She rescued me from prison." Well it was the truth. Even if it technically wasn't actual jail or a traditional dungeon. It was still prison to her.

He hummed and brought her around from the left side of him to the front to get a better look at her but still kept her at arm's length for obvious reasons. He was still dealing with the inner turmoil of emotions suddenly busting inside him, but if there was one thing he was good at it was keeping his mouth shut and his true emotions hidden. Right now he was feeling...He didn't know exactly. Anger? Guilt? Resentment? Maybe a little bit of happiness? He didn't know. Oh no no. Not angry at her or anyone else, but at Vanessa. If the kiddo really rescued a 'lady wearing an apron' (his yellow eyes glazed over her brown leather work apron) and it was Poppy, when it really wasn't a maid or cook after all. Then that also meant that......She was right there the whole time in that heavily chained room. ...And in all the few times he was there he never bothered to look inside ....she was so close...Right there. Which raised a whole bunch of other questions. Was she an ice statue like the others? How long had she been in there? Was she locked in there before or after he was chained up? Did-.....D-Did she know it was because of him? Oh peck! Did the kiddo say anything to her?! Did she recognize him?! Poppy hadn't given any indication she even recognized him so that was probably a big fat no. So then ....Did she resent him? D-Did she even know the reason she was locked away by the mad queen? Did she blame her friend? Guilt and anger at himself bubbled up from himself and he growled. STOP IT SNATCHER!! How many times did you have to tell yourself it's NOT your fault!! ALL OF IT WAS VANESSA'S!! HERS NOT YOURS!! The sudden growl made her jump and he snapped his thinking back towards her movements. The sight of her still scared form seemed to calm her down a lot making him sigh(or give a sigh sound since he didn't have lungs) and frown. Less intimidating than the harsh scowl. And he hoped it wouldn't scare her now that-.......Now that she was...She was back..POPPY WAS BACK AND SAFE! That one thought made him halt in his movements causing her to lightly swing in his grasp at the sudden stop and she blinked at him. His eyes looked over her studiously before she found herself slowly being lowered down, she was placed on her feet and the giant claws retreated back to the ghost who once again towered over her quietly. He studied her dirty still damp self yellow eyes stopping at the twinkling peice of gold around her wrist and blinked at the dirt covered gold bracelet. Yellow eyes widening at it before his ghost brain(if he even had one) kicked into high gear and years of experience being in this scenario rammed back into him making him hum and look back to her confused, lightly scared face. Poppy was safe...For now at least. But what if something happened again. He hissed and was still angry at himself for allowing this to happen to her. Her whole life was stopped because of him and now she had to pay the price for it....but what if-....HE COULD DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT NOW!! YES!! He was so puny and weak back then, but now he had the power to do whatever he wanted. He could take care of his forest, his minions, those kids, and himself...Why COULDN'T he do the same for her..He could..Make it up to her. Make amends and make up for everything he couldn't do for her...YEAH!! Well first he had to seal a deal with her, which meant no one could ever hurt her again. Just as a safety precaution. He'd done it before. And he knew jjuuuust the way to do it.

"This is a nice accessory you got here," he complimented pointing a claw at her wrist. "It's ok if I keep it, right? It's sparkly. I like that. It looks magical."

She blinked and looked to her wrist..And immediately pulled her wrist up and to her chest, her other hand clutching it as she scowled. "NO peckin' way, Ya purple onion reject! I don't know who ya think you are, but there's no way I'm giving you this. It's the only thing I got left from my home!"

He smiled at the sudden gesture even if it didn't nessacarily mean she wasn't giving it up because she missed him. "Im sorry, I forgot to introduce myself. I am the Snatcher. Im the one who takes all your stuff when you forget it under the couch, or deep in the closet....Or in this case. Your SOUL!!" Again her face twisted onto one of fear and he continued to smile and hold up a clawed hand, making a small blue fire appear. "I took it the moment we touched. This small flame is your life force." It really wasn't but he was great at acting when you were a scary prince and people feared you. They beleived anything you told them.

"Y-You...PECKING DIRTY VARMANT!!" She suddenly charged and started jumping and grabbing at the small flames. Horrified and angry her 'life force' was being held hostage by some swamp monster. She was DONE absolutely DONE with her poor life. "GIVE IT BACK!! GIVE IT BACK GIVE IT BACK PLEASE!!"

"You can't have it back. It belongs to ME now. What are you gonna do? You're just a little girl. Only fire magical hurts me, and you're not a fire spirit." He lightly tainted smiling and still staring almost in a happy way at her. This was always too easy. "No one enters my forest and doesn't face some sort of consequences. But tell you what. I've got a piece of paper here, and a nifty one at that too. I've got some work that'll suit you just fine with your spunk." His hand with the tiny flame was suddenly engulfed in blue fire and as she gaped at it like many mortals he's seen. A moment later the bright light dimmed away completely to show a big scroll in his hand without the flame. In one swift motion he unfurled it and lowered it and himself down to her. His head practically upside down as he held it a foot from her face and the other hand grabbing one of her shoulders. "How about a deal!? You get to keep your body, mind, and soul and in return you help me with just a few minor things I can't do as a human. "

"......Deal?", she asked unsure before looking back to the long piece of paper and her hands reaching out to take it from him. He let her and watched in anticipation as she read over the thing. It was almost half her height. A deal with a swamp creature...There's something you don't see every day. The paper looked old and slightly torn around the edges here and there. At the very top of the paper was a fancy drawing of the creature before her with the face and his arms outstretched, beneath that was some very fancy writing that read "CONTRACT" in fancy bold captial cursive letters. The Rest was also in fancy cursive but lucking she could read it pretty well reading someone's fancy cursive order of flowers all the time. It read as followed:

CONTRACT

SERVE THE DEAD WITH WHAT THE AGREEMENT STATES

You have been caught trespassing in the Subcon Forest owned by the benevolant and merciful the Snatcher. The punishment for invaded and disturbing the dead's sacred resting place will be your life long servitude and loyalty to said ruler The Snatcher. Refusing to comply will result in the reposession of one's soul as payment for your crime. But you are lucky enough to have been selected as few mortals to help the eternal after life and anything the Snatcher requests within reason of the servants morals and abilities. The following territories of the forest shall be availble for the signer to visit willingly as they please.

-The Subcon Forest

-The Employer's Home (with special permission)

-The Subcon Forest

These parts shall NOT be availible for any reason and will not be negotiated unless the employer says otherwise.

-The Haunted Manor

-The frozen bridge

-The Subcon Swamp

-The Subcon Well

-The frozen territory

-Any place my employer has said is off limits

By signing this the signer shall be paid for their service and loyalty with immortality, protection from the Snatcher and those under him, a home, and anything the signer requests within reason. Binding by contract means your soul shall remain bound to the contract which cannot be broken by any means except by will of the employer, a.k.a the Snatcher. And in return the signer shall do ask the Snatcher asks with they're full cooperation. If the Snatcher at any point terminates the contract the signer's soul shall be released from his care and they shall live a normal rest of their life. By agreeing you shall also be safe from other supernatural entities and their influences whatever they may be, including influences from the employer and other minions. Also by signing this the signer agrees to willing do this and become a certified minion of The Snatcher. If you have complaints, suggestions, or other, the signer must report them to their employer immediately. As a down payment for all provided by the Snatcher, he shall be given the contract with your soul will be bound to for eternity unless decided otherwise, but the servant will be allowed free of will, full freedom, tasks the employer asks something of them, mind, body, and their soul in their body.

SIGNED

And then there was a small line for her name. Poppy's blue eyes stared gobsmacked at it before rereading it again.......Before closing her mouth and looking up to the smiling spook with a raised brow.

"Do you REALLY expect me to hand over my life to YOU?!"

"Hey! You get to keep literally EVERYTHING. You're soul won't even belong to me. Only the contract it'll be connected too. Plus you don't literally have to do anything except minor tasks. Like going to the book store. You really can't expect me to easily buy books as I am do you?"

"NO! This is ridiculous! I'm not gonna-"

"Look, Po-...Miss." He almost said her name but made a clear throat noise and straightened back up looking down at her. "Perhaps I should've been more...Specific about what you owe me. You see this forest has thousands of spirits here. This is their home. They died here, they were buried somewhere here, and there's lots of obvious graves. Like or not you crashlanded into sacred burial ground disturbing them and annoying them all whether you like it or not. It doesn't matter if it's an accident, to them you invaded their sacred place. Which is also mine. There's a few powerful spirits here but none as powerful as myself. Im offering you a VERY generous deal, I even gave you your soul back once the flame left my hand." He smiled as Poppy suddenly blinked and looked at herself patted herself down as to check to see if her soul was still there. "All I want is a mortal helper to assist me in things I have trouble doing myself being an all powerful spirit. I even offer you anything you want in return. Within reason of course. Maybe you want out of here? To have the spirits forgive you?......Maybe some dry land by the looks of it. By refusing my offer you'd still be invading the undead's home and I don't think many are going to be as generous as I."

Her scowl quickly became a look of concern as she still stared at him. So he was a spirit huh? Was he right? Was there really big bad spirits like him around the swamp. She didn't think she'd ever see a spirit before like this. The guy was MASSIVE and obviously gave off danger vibes to her, but he offered her a deal, and....technically she DID kinda, sorta trespass on his home even if not intentionally. If she was a spirit she'd probably be upset someone walked into her final resting place too. Did it happen often if he was genuinely this annoyed about it? Was it true another spirit would get her if she didn't take his offer? Snatcher smiled wider showing off those fangs when she blinked and reread the contract over again....She didn't know documents too well, and she wasn't exactly an expert in laws like her old friend was, but it all seemed legit. Wasn't anything really underhanded in the paper except for the loyalty of becoming his 'minion' and doing as he asked without question. Boy her life just kept getting weirder and weirder by the hour.

"And what exactly kind of work would you have someone like ME do, Mr. Purple Shadow?," she asked raising a brow. "It's not like I have any special magical powers or anything."

"I don't need anyone else with magical powers around believe me. It's caused me nothing but trouble in the past anyways. Like I said, I only want a mortal helper to help me out with a whole bunch of things a big scary but handsome ghost like me can't."

"Like what?"

"Well as much fun as it would be to scare out an entire town and take the things I want, seeing everyone outside my forest scream and run away from me when I'm trying to simply buy books or something. It would be SO much easier if I had a normal looking mortal to do it for me and bring me things I want, and all kinds of other things a dead person like me can't. You like kids right? Live kids?" That question came out of no where and she rose a brow at how strange and sudden that one was. But he knew the answer was yes anyways, she always remembered how much she'd smile and laugh sweetly at all the children's antics. His minions were techincally those kids, and ...there was the girls. It WOULD be handy to have a lady who loves kids on hand right?...What would've their children have looked like if they ever had the chance to- He shook his head and looked back to her still confused face waiting for an answer.

"Uh....Y-Yes. I think they're some of the cutest creatures on the planet!'' She meant that bit too. "Why do you care though?"

"Because I have two small kids that drive me up a wall all the time. I could use a hand keeping them out of my hair."

Her brows rose. "You have childre-..." She suddenly froze. Blue eyes widening and remembering what the small alien girl said to her. Her father...A spirit. Snatcher- She suddenly pointed at him. "YOU'RE THAT LIL ALIEN'S FATHER?!"

He rose a brow. "Glad you finally caught up with what I was s-"

"She said you could help me!" Usually he'd be annoyed anyone would dare to interrupt him, but he just blinked at her sudden statement. "L-Look." SHe held out her hands holding the paper. "I-I just want some help! She told me you could help, but I don't know how! I'm lost, and everything's not where it should be, and Im having a very hard time believing anything is happening right now! I was frozen dead for a thousand years and rescued by an alien and now I'm talking to a giant purple ghost! I'm afraid I'm going crazy!''

"....Well, I can tell you everything you just said probably happened since I'm definately not an imaginary boogie man. But tell you what. You're lucky. That piece of paper there allows me to provide any help the signer might want within reason. You can clearly read it at the top there." He frowned a little bit. "I'll tell you this. I can't send anyone back in time, and wouldn't want to. But I can make life a lot easier for someone like you, and I can tell you already had it hard as it is. You lost so much already. So don't lose this too. Trust me, you'll regret it." Now she was put on the spot as she froze again and gave a helpless look between him and the paper...and gulped. "You know, you would also be untouchable to Pecking Vanessa. She'd be powerless against me therefore you too in a nutshell. Isn't it worth the price knowing you won't be a block of ice again."

Her eyes widened and she looked back to the paper with a sigh. "B-But...I don't h-have a pe-" He snapped his claws and a feathered pen appeared right next to her. She blinked at it for a moment but to his utter delight she reached a shaking hand up and grabbed it looking back down to the paper. "....W-What if I don't sign it?"

"Then another angry spirit will come and try to have at you for tresspassing. Im not the only ghost in this forest. Just the most powerful.~.....Sign your full name now."

The silence of the forest was interrupted by the soft scratching of a pen against paper slowly. Snatcher's smile became wider, and wider, and wider as she nervously signed away until she wrote the last 'n' of her last name. Once she did the pen disappeared in a small puff of smoke and she jumped, her grip on the contract loosening enough for the giant ghost to snatch it from her. At the same time a giant burst of energy throbbed hard within the very core of her body. Temparaily knocking the wind outta her. She gasped and fell to her hands and knees at the sudden tight feeling within her. Her body emitting a small purple light in the dead center of her chest before as soon it came it left and she stayed her gasping and blinking at the sudden sensation that came and left. Leaving goosebumps across the pale flesh and her shaking like a leaf again. Coughing and eventually snapping a scowl up to him. He smiled reading over the contract before it disappeared in a puff of flames too.

"That seals the deal, Lady! We're in business!"

"W-W-What the PECK was THAT?!," she demanded glaring at him.

"Relax. You're unharmed. It was just the bond ceiling between us and the magic forming a strong protective shield around your soul. Don't worry. You're safe now." His voice went a little soft there at the end as did his expression as he continued to stare at her. Poppy. His Poppy. His Princess of Flowers. She was safe. Free from any danger, out of Vanessa's grip, and safe at last. And with him after all this time. ....He shouldn't be happy about that. He still felt very guilty about her being locked away and frozen for a thousand years but I digress. But things were ok now. He would make sure of it. "SO. New Errand Girl." Still keeping up the act for now as he watched her get back onto her feet. "Tell me all about this little problem of yours. And follow me. You'll want to see you're new work place."

He went to grab her again but she took a step back and held up her hands still lightly scowling. "No thanks. I can walk."

He shrugged. "Suit yourself. Now. Are you going to tell me why the old blooming pecker locked you up and threw away the key?" he started forward again and she reluctantly followed. No sense in staying in the fog anyways right.

"To be honest I don't really remember." She gazed down as she walked, arms crossing over her chest. "It's...kinda fuzzy."

His full attention was on her as he scowled and hummed. "What do you remember?"

"I...remember these two big men in suits grabbing me from my stands when I was closing the shop. I think they might've been the Queen's knights." Snatcher scowled harder remembering those two very well. He could still almost feel them using their insane strength to hold him to the wall and chain him. "And then I was taken to the Queen's summer home and saw this monster...I mean the queen."

"No. You were right the first time. She was always a monster, it just took her a while to show everyone what was really inside. So don't give her any credit. She was never a queen, just a spider wearing a pretty mask."

She looked at him surprised. "Oh....Did you know her? I think the little alien said something about you were my age."

He bristled purple hair puffing up for a moment as he stared at her...before he scowled again. "Who DIDN'T know her?! She was Queen and then cursed EVERYTHING!!" He gave a small growl...before forced himself to calm down because she was looking at him funny and gave a sighing noise. "There's lots of spirits around here that was a poor victim of her tantrum." That wasn't a lie. There was lots of minions and dwellers that froze from her curse. "I'm sorry for what happened. But...A-Anyways, what happened after you met the crazy dame? What did she lock you up for?"

"I-......*sigh* I don't know. I think she said something about treason, but it's all fuzzy. And I SWEAR to you." She gave him an almost pleading look. "I didn't do anything but sell flowers in the square! I've never even met her before!''

He held up a hand. "OH! Believe me I believe you more than I would believe her. Lots of innocent lives were lost by her...But please. Feel free to continue." A guilty feeling bubbled up in himself and he had a pretty good idea what 'treason' Vanessa locked her away for.

She looked back down sadly...and shrugged. "That's about it. They threw me inside this big empty room, and locked me in. And then..." Her brows furrowed in thought. "....Uh. I don't remember what happened. All I remember was I was really cold and it was dark...and it was still so cold when I woke up. I could've sworn I was unconcious for a few hours."

He held up a hand again. "And let me take a guess at what happened next. Hattie blew the door down and took you back to her weird place in the sky, right?"

She nodded. "YES!! That's exactly it! She used her magic umbrella thing and there was this other little girl and then ..Hattie said you were a ghost and could help me. I still don't know how but ...I don't know. I guess knowing someone from my time was here after all was enough for me to get talked into getting teleported again. But then I ended up falling through the sky and crash landing into those poor trees." She looked at him. "H-How big is this Swamp, Mr. Snatcher Ghost?"

He rose a ghostly brow. "Don't call me Mr. Snatcher Ghost. Im known as Snatcher and nothing else and I would appreciate it if you'd call me that too. ...But the swamp's not that big. Maybe a small percent of my whole forest and territory. Subcon's a big place."

She stopped walking for a moment and looked at him. "Subcon..A-As in the Subconia or Subconette Kingdom?" She wondered which one she landed in.

He gazed at her silently for a moment before shrugging. "Both. A lot's changed over a thousand years, Lady. Those kingdoms don't exist anymore. Just some reminders left behind."

That was it. The thorn that pricked the skin. Poppy stopped staring there right at him for a good long moment....before the weight buckled from under her and she fell to her knees with a blank expression glanced to the ground. Immediately he floated over and held his hands arm unsure.

"H-Hey! Lady?!.....P-Poppy. Are you alright?" A choke came from her and fresh tears came down her face as she started crying, and he froze. A sudden feeling of guilt and worry bubbled up at the sudden crying. All the emotions and situation finally hitting her hard like a punch to the gut and finally breaking her down for him to see. Snatcher floated there for a moment still unsure what to do ....before unsurely putting one arm around her and his other hand being engulfed in flames, a hankercheif appearing in it before he awkwardly offered it to her. "Uh....There, there? It's ok. You're alright, right?"

She grabbed the small cloth from her and uselessly wiped at her face. "I-I LOST EVERYTHING!! AND EVERYONE I EVER CARED ABOUT IS G-G-GONE!!" She blew her nose into the small cloth and sniffed wiping her face with her arm. "W-W-What am I supposed to do?! My life is over!!"

"H-Hey! That's not true I-.....*sigh*" He rubbed the back of his head and tried to scramble for a solution. He was NOT good at having heart to heart talks even to himself, so...what would he say to this? He looked back to her as one thought crossed his mind. "I-I...I know exactly how you feel." He scowled. "Yeah. I know EXACTLY how that feels. Vanessa took everything from me too when she froze everything!" He growled and his grip on her became a bit tighter if he was being a lil protective. "I pecking didn't see it coming until it froze me right before my very eyes! I died before my life even took off the ground and now I'm stuck like this....But you aren't." He ...attempted a smile. "Listen, Poppy. I'm not good at this speaking from the heart stuff, but Im pretty good at speaking from experience stuff. So trust me when I saw you still got your whole life plus more ahead of you. It's....probably going to take a while for you to process this properly and start to move on like I did...But your friends wouldn't have wanted you to wallow over them. You can still do things now you're not a frozen statue locked in some room like Vanessa's trophy. And.....I-I promise I will help you. Alright?" And he meant it too. He owed it to her after all that happened. He'd help his dear friend-

"W-What AM I supposed to do now?...E-Everything's-"

"Gone?", he finished for her sighing again. "Look. I ....can't change the past no matter how badly I want to. But I can change the future, and so can you. Think of all the things you can do now without anyone to hold you back!" He might've been speaking from what he perceived as a positive but she gave him a funny look. "Uh...By that I mean vanessa of course. She's not holding you prisoner anymore."

"Gee...T-Thanks for the swell pep talk, Buddy. *hic*" She wiped her eyes again before trying to give back the cloth, to which Snatcher cringed and snapped his fingers making it disappear.

"Hey. I said I wasn't good at that kind of stuff....Hey." He rose a ghostly brow and looked around. "You said the kid brought you here. Where is she?"

She blinked and stared at him for a moment. "I-....I-I don't know. All I remember is falling and landing in swamp water."

He hummed and thought for a moment. Poppy blinked when she was grabbed and raised to her feet by him again. "I have a good idea about where she went. Come on. On your feet. I want to see if my hunch is right."

***********************************************************************************************

"MS POPPY!?"

The shouting of the children still echoed through out the forest as the small hatted girl ran down the dirt path towards the tree house. Blue eyes frantically looking around at every dead tree, tombstone, and dweller that she passed. Desperately looking for a moment of pale skin and red hair. Bow was bounding behind her right on her tail also wearily looking around the forest passing dwellers and subconites alike as she hightailed it after. Both were worried Poppy would soon end up on the wrong side of the forest by now! The swamp! Snatcher's traps! ....GOOD PECKING GOSH!! WAS SNATCHER EVEN BACK YET!? She'd be dead meat without one of the girl's to explain why a grown woman was suddenly walking around in his forest. How could she have let go of her hand and not realize it!? She felt like crying once the sight of the ghost's familiar home came into view. Getting another rush at seeing it, she bounded towards it as fast as she could. Pulling back on her heels digging into the ground and grabbing the hat on her head as she came back to a sliding stop in front of the empty home. Panting and startling the ghosts around it. After a few seconds, Bow ended up stopping right behind her and falling to her knees gasping and wheezing after the long run they did as her friend looked around at everything. No one but the ghosts and Rough Patch that was curled up in Snatcher's chair looking like someone randomly placed a bush in his home.

"Are you looking for the boss, Newbie?," one of the subconites asked pointing in the direction Snatcher previously rushed off too. "You missed him. He left 'bout fifthteen minutes ago."

"OH NO!! OH NO!!" Hattie immediately turned and began running in the direction the minion pointed leaving Bow heaving and sitting there too tired to follow anymore. Running blindly into the woods wasn't the best idea but what was she supposed to do at that now? What if Snatcher spotted Poppy? What if she fell into one of his traps? What if- The child suddenly came to a screeching halt at what emerged out of the woods before her with a scowl. "....Snatcher?!"

The spirit scowled and laserfocused on the little girl right in front of him....Before edging a little bit to the right revealing the red haired tired looking woman behind him. The two girls locked eyes for a solid moment...Before Hattie sighed in releif and wiped her forehead.

"Kid. You have got a lot of explaining to do."

[anavakarian]

Day 26: past

Ok, I have to admit that this is a very long blurt out, but I just want to see more actual conversations between these two!

Read it on AO3

It was one of those evenings, lazy, idle, early Spring, that brings scents of newborn flowers and sunlight. And especially there, in the middle of the forest, at the Warehouse. 

The rising temperatures had finally dried up the accumulated mud after the heavy winter snow and crescent light gave infinite brushstrokes of a renovated green palette. The vast majority of sprouts had reawakened already, green stems poking out everywhere, and new buds awoke back to life on the trees. But the first flowers to grow were, like always, daffodils: they had already covered the field surrounding the Warehouse with a wild layer of fluorescent yellow. 

But despite the obvious changes in temperature and climate, the weather had decided to give the last breath of its bad old habits, unleashing the most unwelcomed storm that weekend. Meaning that my plan to go to the shore with Verda and his family had been postponed, to my disappointment. But I completely understood that the lightning, thunder and the water pouring from the clouds was not the perfect frame to visit and play by the seaside with two little girls.

To top it, all my attempts of going back to my house had been frustrated by a bunch of concerned vampires that seemed to know beforehand how bad the storm would become before I was even able to hear the first raindrops falling. Now, the narrow road that led to the main one had turned into quicksands that impeded any vehicle to drive through. 

And that is how I find myself stuck in the Warehouse for another weekend with Unit Bravo. Although, this time, there are no missions, no assignments, no meetings… Nothing to do at all. 

Not that I’m complaining: it's always fun to be around Felix; Mason is… definitely caustic, although that doesn’t have to be something bad; I will be able to catch up on some research with Nate and, perhaps - and just if the stars aligned correctly - even train a little bit with Adam. Although, this time, I will try my best to not end our sparring with a heated hold against the floor, even if, since it happened, I haven’t been able to brush the whole scene from my mind at all. 

For this Friday evening, I decided to build my fortress in the library, surrounded by my ‘pending list of readings to catch up with’, feet up on the sofa, joggers, tank top, and a comforting glass of red wine. 

And it seems that ‘stubborn minds think alike’, as Adam enters the library with a book and his own glass in his hand. He sits on the opposite side of the 5 seater sofa - as far away as he can from me - without any words at all and opens the book in his lap. 

I glance at him over the pages of the ‘Fae Compendium’ I’m reading just to admire his perfect posture: both feet flat on the floor, straight back and, just for once, relaxed shoulders. My gaze lingers distractedly over the outline of his discreet Roman nose and the squared profile of his jaw before sliding down towards the broadness of his shoulders and the defined muscles of his arm, stretching the sleeve of his before-usual grey t-shirt. Cargo trousers and more military attire have been recently removed from his wardrobe and replaced by smart clothes - shirts, chinos, shoes… - more according to his rank and the peculiarities of their work in Wayhaven. Although Mason was all scorn and smirks at Adam’s noticeable change of essential clothing, Felix dropped something about him trying to impress someone… And despite Adam’s emotional constipation, I became quite aware that someone was clearly me.

He confessed that ‘I was everything’ and we held hands at the Carnival. It doesn’t seem much at all, but there’s also this insane pulling between us every time we are together. I cannot put words on it. It feels… natural. Good and right. Even if he drives me insane with his sternness and his stubbornness… Although I have to admit that I’m also guilty of the latest, too. 

But despite that magnetism or chemistry that pulls us inevitably, neither of us have made any approach effort since the Carnival. Adam… well, because he’s Adam. And me… because it feels somehow correct to wait for him to make the next move. At the end of the day, he’s the one who seems to be struggling to understand what is going on between us. My interest has been laid bare at his feet. Many times. But I’m still waiting for him to decide what he wants to do with it.

As if feeling my concealed and thoughtful stare, his icy green eyes met mine and my stomach flips at being caught. However, I lock my eyes boldly in his, even if I feel my cheeks reddening and the tips of my fingers and toes tingling with excitement. 

“D’you know…? It’s usually polite to say hello when you get into a place and find someone else there,” I tease him with a matter-of-fact tone.

Adam’s lips curl up a little bit in return. “I apologize, Detective. You looked quite immersed in the reading. I didn’t want to bother you.”

I hum noncommittally as an answer and go back to my book. And, after feeling his gaze lingering for a little longer over me, Adam goes also back to his. 

The silence feels comfortable and that is one of the things that shocks me the most about our relationship: even if the tension between us is a permanent tangible thing, I can perfectly sit with him for hours, just reading or filling out reports… when we are at ease with each other.

I shake my head, trying to stop thinking about him, and I go back to my book. 

“Fae supernaturals healing abilities are definitely better than human beings. However, the recovery time differs depending on the species and the nature of the wound. 

On the next chart, there are examples of the most common traumas in comparison with the species and the healing time for each of them…”

Shit… I like history, mythology, psychology… And can even do with some biology if necessary, but this is too much for a Friday evening. 

Twenty minutes later, my boredom is starting to win the battle. Distractedly, I run a hand through my pixie haircut, brushing the close-crop part at the back of my head. 

I have to admit that I love the raspy feeling of short hair on my fingers. 

It makes a quiet brushing sound that seems to catch Adam’s attention. I can feel, more than see, how he glances at my subtle movement over his book. 

And I meet his eyes, emerald green washing over me with intensity. 

His gaze snaps away from mine nearly immediately and there’s a rushed rustling when he turns some pages, clearing his throat. 

But I keep staring. And I’m bored. And sudden curiosity sparkles in my mind. 

I knew it before, the fact that Adam is more than 900 years old, basically because he told me. But I never got to think of the implications that it meant and I’m heavily struck by it. Like if suddenly understanding that he has actually lived, walked over the Earth, for 900 years. More than 9 human lives! 

And I’m utterly gobsmacked and even lightheaded just thinking of it. 

In less than a blink, a ton of questions pile up in my mind and itch in my tongue - history, customs, anthropology, religion… - and I decide to finally dismiss the Fae, trying to decide if I should ask them or not. And I’m sure he notices my hesitant stare by the way he shifts his weight a bit. But what really took him off his reading was my fingers tapping insistently a regular and unnerving pattern over the hard book cover in my lap.

He turns his head at me, emerald green finally meeting sapphire blue. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” I lie. 

He gives me a condescending gaze, arching a blonde brow, and the gesture is so incredulous and yet so encouraging that it makes me speak my mind. “I was just thinking of how old you actually are…”

His eyebrows furrow nearly immediately, drawing a deep set of creases between them. Perhaps my admiration has been misunderstood under the boldness of the statement.

“I mean that you have lived for many years and over so many historical periods that I just find it difficult to understand...”

“What is it difficult to understand?” His words are spare and his tone, stern, although there’s a hint of honest curiosity behind them, encouraging the conversation despite his frown. 

Speaking to Adam is like feeding a stray cat: you never know exactly when you’re overstepping your proximity, although I’m fully aware that he enjoys some old good snarky comments and clever retorts sometimes… But they can also scare him away in the blink of an eye. 

“How are you still sane, for instance?” I declare with a shrug, the Fae book resting in my lap, open awkwardly, forcing its spine. 

It’s obvious that my question takes him completely off-guard. After some silent seconds, analyzing the teasing and the meaning of it, Adam chuckles quietly. “That’s a very good question, indeed… Sometimes I ask myself that same exact thing.”

It seems that I passed the test. For now. 

“It’s just… I can’t wrap my mind around it. Nearly 1000 years are loads of years!”

“They are, trust me. I’m well aware of it.”

I can’t avoid the feeling that he’s mocking me now or being sincere. It is difficult to tell when his expression is so serious most of the time.  “How were things? When you were human, I mean…”

His expression suddenly changes: from a thin friendly grin to pursed lips. Adam examines me with a critical eye before speaking. “Are you going to turn this evening into a personal interrogation, Detective?” His words are laced with reluctancy but it doesn’t take me by surprise. 

I asked something too personal. I stepped too far.

However, he hasn’t retrieved just yet the book that he had left closed over his thighs, which means he might be keen on carrying on talking.

I try to solve the situation, swiftly explaining my intentions, giving him an honest look back. “I’m not asking you about the specifics of your life, but about the world around you, if that makes sense?” 

“And why would I do that?”

Curiosity underlays his words and I use it on my behalf. “Because you can ask me anything you want in return?”

He breathes in deeply, considering, still eyeing me carefully as if he was about to sign a contract with the devil himself. 

I am nearly losing my hopes that he would offer himself for that little game when Adam nods, closing his book and putting it aside on the coffee table, retrieving his glass of wine. Then, he bends his leg and rests it on the sofa, shifting his whole body to face me. 

He looks… relaxed. Younger with no traces of a frown or his usual stern expression. At ease as I’ve never seen him before. And devilishly handsome.

A rush of nervousness jolts in my body and I completely forget what I wanted to ask, realizing - despite all the odds - how deeply I’m falling for that man. The sudden desire of reaching out for him and tracing his perfectly chiselled jawline with my fingers overwhelms me for an instant. 

But that would be too much. It would be stepping too far, again. 

Whatever battle he is dealing with himself about us, Adam is the only one who can solve it, and I don’t mind waiting. 

Although I don’t fully understand what is going on in his mind.

“If we are going to do this, you’ll have to be more specific, Detective: I cannot tell you everything about the Early Middle Ages…”

I don’t wait for him to finish the sentence, closing my book and putting it aside as well. “How was life? How were the living conditions?” I ask with eagerness.

He scoffs. “That’s far away from being more specific...” However, he quietens and thinks for some seconds. “Life was… tough. And brief, but intense. And dirty. Death was as ordinary as breathing. People died. Illness, famishing, wars… Many of us were lucky to survive our childhood. The culture was kept locked in the monasteries and life was impossible to conceive without religion. Nobility fought against each other for more land, vassals or resources… that was everyday life.”

I retrieve my glass of wine from the table, rolling the stem in my fingers distractedly. “You’re painting it very bad…”

“It was very bad. They are not called the Dark Ages in vain.”

“Did you only live in Normandy?”

“Mostly. Except when my family got involved in wars of vassalage agreements with the feudal lord or the king. But I would rather not talk about it.”  

That is clearly my cue to drop the topic, but I am just curious about one last thing. “Ok, can you indulge me with this one? I guess that you belonged to some sort of nobility back then… Did you? Did you have a castle?”

The tips of his lips curve up on a soft grin. “Minor nobility. And yes, we did have a castle.”

“Well… that explains so many things… Like why you boss everyone around, for example.”

My comment makes him chuckle and I’m delighted to hear the sound, rich and warm. The fleeting view of dimples made me smile in return, trying to take in as much as I can of it. 

But I’ve got many more questions to be answered. Honest historical curiosity. “Did the system work back then? Feudalism?” 

“I suppose it depends on who you ask. It obviously worked for the feudal lord, but trust me that the vassals and the peasants had a very different opinion about it. The wealth and the land belonged to the lord, as books say. And they only responded to the king. Peasants had many taxes to pay. Most of them were paid in kind, as they didn’t have anything else to pay with. That led to hunger, and hunger led to war and death.”

“It is not an optimistic point of view at all…”

“It was what it was.”

“When did things start to change?”

“Believe it or not, when religion started to ease its grip over everything and education and science made their appearance. During the whole Middle Ages, the culture was based and contained in monasteries. Normal people didn’t have any sort of education and mostly everyone was illiterate, including some nobility, too…”

Curiosity strikes me and I can’t help but interrupt him. “Were you one of them?”

Adam gives me a chiding look. “No, I was not. My family took our education very seriously. But as I was saying, things began to change when knowledge started to be more accessible to everyone. It was still mostly reserved for wealthy statements of society and nobility, but it made a whole difference after some years.”

I nod my head, sipping from my wine and he mirrors my gesture. Questions blurt in my mind: now I know he had siblings for sure, so I file the information up in my brain for another occasion, perhaps.

“Is our current government system better?” 

“Definitely, although many things can still be improved. Don’t you think so?”

“Yes, I mean… I think our system is quite unfair and wealth and power are still very badly distributed, but I haven’t known anything else. Obviously, you have a wider perspective of how things have changed or improved.” 

His seriousness turns into a very thin smile, but there’s a mischievous tone underlying his question. “Are you agreeing with me for once?”

“Oy, I agree with you more than often,” I say, faking indignant, making him arch an incredulous brow. 

“Anyway, there are still many places that have a close-to-feudal government system and I will give you that, even in ours, the power and wealth are not fairly distributed, yet. But I suppose it’s a matter of time. Probably a long time.”

I nod my head with the certainty that, unless anything changes, I won’t be alive to appreciate the expected changes. But a new line of questioning bursts in my mind. “Have you been to any of those countries?” I ask, suddenly curious about his own experiences over 900 years.

Adam shifts again on the sofa, leaning his side on the back of it, and his top stretches gracefully over his tightened biceps. “No, Not recently. Our last assignment took us to different areas of South America, where some countries still have a ‘curious’ political situation.”

“Wow… You must have travelled quite a lot in 900 years…” It was not a question but a statement.

“Yes, I have. What about you?”

His question takes me by surprise. At this point, my human life seems too boring and far too mundane to have any interest at all. My brain stammers in finding a proper answer to it. “I… I don’t know. Well, yes, of course, I know. Not as much as I would have liked to, I suppose.” 

I am fully aware of the vagueness of my answer by the way he quirks his eyebrow at me, demanding more information.

“I wasn’t very specific, was I?” I ask, scrunching my nose. I don’t have to wait for his answer to carry on. “Ok, I went to uni, I got pissed when Rebecca pulled back my application for the FBI and I put everything on standby. I got a backpack and I set off to Europe. I was ‘on the run’ for two years, but that’s why I babble in so many languages. Do you speak any languages?”

Adam purses his lips and I see a flick of embarrassment on his features. “Latin, English and French… Only because I learnt them when I was a child,” he confesses. 

“How so? I had very high language expectations for a person that has lived over 900 years…” I tease him.

I find it quite funny the way he tries to explain himself. “Well… French and English have changed considerably since Medieval times… French had been quite important for many centuries. Back in time, more than half of Europe spoke French. And then English grew up to be the trade language: there was no need to learn anything else at all...”

“Fair point, I suppose…” I have to admit. “Or perhaps you were just being a bit lazy…?”

His smile widens. “I suppose you can also put it that way… I’m not… gifted for languages,” Adam admits, to my surprise. But before I can tease him further, he puts me under the spotlight, once again. “Where did you live? When you travelled to Europe, I mean.”

His interest seems genuine and it encourages my explanations and makes me a bit nervous, indeed. “Florence and Rome in Italy, suburbs of Paris, Berlin, Barcelona and Santander in Spain, London, of course, Budapest for a little while, although the language was too much for me…”

There’s a shine of admiration in his emerald eyes. And curiosity. “That’s quite a long journey for just two years.”

“It was… I quite enjoyed it: meeting new people, getting to know every secret and hidden corner of the cities… I didn’t do bad: I usually shared accommodation and worked in many crappy places.” I smile melancholically at the memory. “Rebecca also financed part of the trip, trying to buy my forgiveness. I suppose she felt guilty for ruining my expectations within the FBI...”

Even if my tone is easy, there’s still a sharp bitterness lacing my words and Adam notices it. He knows how bad the relationship with Agent Greene is. And, unlike Nate and Felix, I do really appreciate the fact that he has never tried to fix it, probably understanding the harm done and the fact that it was not his business at all.

“You clearly liked that life, why to come back here?”

I sigh with deep resignation. “I wish I could have stayed travelling… One day she turned the tap off. I survived for some months, but my income was not good enough and, sadly, my studies were quite criminology/psychology orientated to begin a brand new career in a different country.”

“But why come back here, to Wayhaven? You could have gone anywhere else.”

I chuckle bitterly. “Come back here was the last thing on my list, trust me: it was not in my plans at all. But they offered me the job and the promotion right after on a silver platter. An easy and shooting career, I have to admit. Not many people get to be a detective in less than a year. Of course Rebecca had something to do with it, but who cared at that point.”

Adam hums quietly, meditative. “I have to admit that, after having worked with you for some time, you are fairly competent as a detective.”

Wow, is that a compliment? Coming from him? About my skills as a detective? 

His face is totally serious and I’m secretly glad that we are past the stage when we headbutted each other every day about our leadership disagreements. “Thank you, I suppose. It means quite a lot, coming from you and I do really appreciate it. Anyway, it’s my turn again. What is your craziest story about travelling?” I enquiry, sipping some wine.

“Are we talking about missions with the Agency?”

“No, not really. Something curious, funny or unusual… I don’t know. Whatever!” 

Adam thinks for a little while, emptying his glass in the process and I give him some time for it. Definitely, 900 years are many years to think about. 

“I think it was travelling the Silk Road little after its popularity grew within the West of Europe… It had been quite popular for some centuries already in Byzantium, but I think I must have been one of the first travellers from the Northern regions… Probably the palest person no one had ever seen there, or that’s what I deduced by the way everyone treated me. Once we arrived in Asia… It was quite common that people stopped me to touch my hair or my face as if they couldn’t believe I was real… Obviously, my features were quite different from the people that lived there… Probably they hadn’t seen anyone so white before...”

I can’t help but snicker at his words, picturing the situation like something taken from a film. “Well, it is true that you’re really pale. Perhaps a sunbathe from time to time would help with that…” my brain supplies, all witty.

He gives me a chiding look, one eyebrow arched up. “I wish it was that easy but trust me, it doesn’t work that way at all, Eve...”

My name sounds warm and sweet like honey on his lips and a thrill of pleasure runs down my spine thinking of him calling my name in many very different contexts, probably with fewer clothes involved. 

“That’s a shame… I’m sure it would be quite a sight,” I return, flirty and mischievous. 

Damn it! Sometimes I can’t just help it… But, to my surprise, Adam meets my gaze with a rather playful smirk and seems about to retort something back to me. 

But, suddenly, his expression turns grave and he quietens, whatever he was about to say dying in his lips. 

Perhaps it’s better not to pursue that line of conversation anymore. 

I hear some steps on the corridor, even and unhurried. They stop in front of the library door and I turn my gaze to it, expecting Nate’s tall figure to come inside. Out of the corner of my eye, I perceive how Adam stiffens, still looking at me, but I’m sure he’s listening carefully to whoever is in the corridor. After some seconds, the steps resume, getting further away from us and he seems to relax again.

I won’t be surprised if he decides we had enough conversation already but, to my amazement, he adjusts his position on the sofa and waits for me to carry on with my interrogation, an encouraging calm expression on his face. 

And I have to admit that I blank for some seconds, not knowing what to ask to keep him talking on the most friendly and intimate moment we have shared since we met. “What’s the best part of these times? What do you like the most?”

“Do you mean from this age?”

I just nod my head, eager to know his answer. 

“Many things, I suppose… Water supply, medical advances, hygiene, the Internet, phones, flushable private toilets, cars…”

“Toilets?” I am a bit puzzled before understanding that toilets were actually quite different not many years ago. “Oh… ah! Fair enough.”

Adam gazes at me and offers me an amused tiny smile but I’m already interested in something else he said before. “Was it difficult to learn driving?”

His chest lowers in a contained sarcastic scoff and he rolls his eyes. I love the gesture immediately. “An odyssey at first, but I grew to like it. Nate is the only one who is still working on it.”

“I know he’s not very keen on any sort of technology… Last time I texted him it took him 12 min to type a reply... He told me you like cars.”

“Not the actual cars, but I like restoring and repairing them.”

His statement leaves me open-mouthed, as in my narrowed mind it’s quite hard to believe than a 900 years old vampire could remotely be able to understand the mechanics of a car. “Hang on… Do you actually know how to repair a car?”

For a parted moment, Adam feels quite pleased with himself. “Is it that surprising? I had to invest properly the time I didn’t use for learning languages...”

I gaze at his face, confused. His expression is soft but serious, however, there’s again that hint of sarcasm in his beautiful green eyes. “You know what? It’s very difficult to know when you are joking when your expression is exactly the same one than when we are arguing, you know?” I tease him, faking indignant. 

He chuckles again and I melt with the sound. 

I don’t want this evening to end. This conversation to end. Us. 

“Perhaps you can give me a hand with mine, then?” I ask, hopeful. 

But Adam just shakes his head. “I fix cars, but I don’t do miracles, Eve. Your car... I think buying a new one would be advisable in your case”

I shoot him a glare at his snarky comment but I’m happy to see that he’s openly smiling at me. 

“Do you have any hobbies? What do you do when you’re not at the police station or working with us?” he wants to know.

Another question enquiring about me. I empty my glass and put it on the side table, realizing how green and clear his eyes are and how at ease he seems to be right now. Probably the distance between us has something to do with it (we are still sitting on opposite sides of the sofa). “Not that I had much time lately, but working out, writing, playing the guitar… But I’m sure you know that last one already.”

He hums in acknowledgement but doesn’t seem content with just one question. His next one is actually quite deep. “Do you regret knowing about us? Not just the Unit. Knowing about supernaturals’ existence?”

I divert my gaze from his and lean back on the arm of the sofa, wiggling my toes extended in front of me. It still takes me a long deep breath in to put my thoughts together to reply to his question, knowing I’m stepping on thin ice. “I did at first.”

Adam lowers his gaze. A quick scene of one of our conversations right after I was informed about everything flashes in my mind. He called himself a monster and I didn’t do anything to contradict the statement. I was not in the correct mindset, neither ready to see the truth. Embarrassment at my doing seeps through every pore of my skin. “But I don’t anymore. Learning the truth hasn’t been easy, but I wouldn’t change it at all. I’m quite glad to be part of it with you.” 

His eyes dart to mine with a mixture of gratitude and alarm at my confession and I don’t really want to, but I explain myself further. “With all of you, Unit Bravo.”

But specifically you. 

As he relaxes again, I decide to push my luck further. “Adam… I always wanted to ask you this but I will understand if you don’t want to answer. Did you keep in touch with your family after… You know… Becoming a vampire?” 

Deep old sadness dampens his green eyes that flicker to the wall behind me and I’m nearly sure he won’t reply. He seems to be lost in memories for some seconds before meeting my gaze again.  “I did at first. I was not ready to assume what happened to me. I was in denial.” 

“Was it not compatible? To be with your family, I mean...”

He smiles again but this time is quite different. Guilty and melancholic. “Not for a young vampire. Not at all. I had to leave...”

I regret bringing up the topic immediately because I don’t want to know about it. Not if it hurts him. Not if he is not ready. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you recall painful memories. I understand that if you love someone you are never ready to let go…”

“I tracked my descendants for some generations, but their lives were fleeting. Mortal lives still are sometimes. It became more and more difficult within the years. The loss…”

“So you just shut down…” I mutter, suddenly understanding.

Adam stares at me with glazed green eyes under blonde eyelashes, looking at me but without seeing me, lost in memories. And it all made sense now. All of him. 

The only way he has been able to survive has been closing himself to any feeling. Switching off that part of his humanity that cared about anyone else. And that is why he’s so disturbed around me. Because I break his defences and remind him of everything he has lost. 

The fact that he has feelings for me breaks the balance that his life has had for nearly a thousand years and he is completely lost on what to do about it. 

About me. About us.

He just doesn’t want to lose me.

And there’s just one way he wouldn’t have to.

“Are you all right?” I ask, shyly and guilty.

“Yes. I am,” he states after a sharp inhale, retrieving his book from the table. 

“I’m going to have dinner with Nate, would you like to join us?”

“No, thank you. I’ll carry on with my reading, Detective.”

Our conversation is clearly over and I smile sadly at the recovered title, my name forbidden on his lips once again. 

“Thank you,” I say while standing up.

“What for?”

“For talking to me. For letting me know you.”

Adam doesn’t reply, but I swear I can see the quirk of a smile blooming on his lips when he looks at me. 

When I walk past him, my hand lands on his broad shoulder and I feel him stiffen at the contact, all hard muscle and warmth under my touch. I give him a grateful squeeze. 

My heart stutters and my breath hitches when his own hand covers mine, interlacing our fingers loosely for just some seconds. 

“Thank you for understanding,” he hushed whispers before I resume my steps.

@31daysofwayhaven