#cmon..

[monstamonstar]

david ❤️‍🩹

he’s so cocky in this photo…i’m gonna crumple him into my pocket

[whateverdraws1008]

i need more ship names like- bug&boo (ghostroach) , boobomb (soapghost) and... bruh i think they're the only ones who have cute nicknames. LEARN FROM TF2 COMMUNITY, ALL SHIPS HAVE THEIR LITTLE NICKNAMES!!

[superchat]

youd be surprised (maybe) how many ppl irl ive talked to who didnt know our measuring system was called the imperial system. they knew there was the metric system but i guess just never bothered to ask what we use, like...

[angelsarewatching]

i dont even read the 'x reader' fics man but like how have they all missed out on being passed between the riley brothers. like how did we overlook that. like we got the manuel roba arc in the x readers and the brooding soldier guy backstory from a 2009 comic and like forget tommy riley. im sorry. maybe i just like tommy riley too much. but guys. guys can you please imagine. just for a second. you, y/n, or whatever, at a bar, being hit on by these two handsome look-alikes. the whole blonde boy vs dark haired boy thing wanting your attention. like it's a popular trope so i was wondering why it wasn't more popular.

like genuinely. the dark romantic vs sweetheart romantic boy vying for your attention. simon the one who makes sure no one approaches you and acts like a jealous, broody lapdog whenever you go out anywhere. tommy the one who makes you giggle with his stupid jokes and puts flowers in your hair. like do you guys know where i'm going with this?

and also being fucked by both of them. yeah.

[ellearts]

Insta is so weird cuz what do you mean it takes only one famous friend to repost it onto their story and people suddenly like it and notice it like.

[helsex]

Uhoh are we doing the "maybe you should consider getting Tumblr premium 🥺" thing again to go with our bi-yearly "Tumblr is shutting down" panic...

[lara4eclipze]

why am i lowkey flopping...

[fluff-e-boy]

Things I inherited from my father: health issues and a god complex

Thing I did not inherit from my father: height

[frownyalfred]

local mob boss, puffing on a cigarette angrily:

goon:

Batman, tied to a chair six feet away:

mob boss: did ya have to tie him to the chair with his legs spread open like that?

[bruciemilf]

“You don't think I know my own palace? I built it.”

[witchstone]

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[yeehawllywood]

I’ve been in a “cybertruck owners only” group for a year now just to watch posers try to haul over towing capacity but it has yielded something more beautiful lately

[valtsv]

enough paintings of saints where they're looking heavenward in ecstatic agony or down with love and mercy on their onlookers as they ascend. we need more paintings where the martyr is looking accusatorily directly at the viewer.

[flipflopmasterr]

Enjoyed the stream a lil bit too much. Thank you guys!

[open image for better quality!!]

[snailfen]

saw this post and couldnt like it cus i guess im blocked by them but honestly this is a hilarious way to find out