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starsxblazing · 1 year ago

Note

Could i request and azriel fic where he had a crush on reader for years but didn’t act on it because he wss fixated on this whole three brothers and three sisters thing. But he realised that he and elain don’t have anything in common so they stay friends and he tells her about reader. When he sees her again she had a child with another illyrian but they aren’t together. Her son is maybe 2-3 years old, he starts to spend more time with her as friends but he knows that he still loves her. The bond snaps for him but he doesn’t say anything yet. He basically moved her into his home because he wants them to be together every minute. (Some dadaz and son time would be cute. ) They all sit at dinner with the inner circle and readers son calls him dad, cassian and rhys are both happy for their brother and thats when the bond also snaps for reader. Just fluff and daddy az ? Where he shows him how to fly and tell the babe how he is going to be a big brother.

That may be long, so if you don’t want to write something that long, then thats also fine 🫶🏼

a/n: I can't say enough just how much I love seeing the batboys being fathers

Azriel x Reader

Yours Truly

Azriel hated going to the war camps and always avoided it whenever he could. Despite his feelings, Rhysand had ordered him to go with Cassian to check in with them since the war was drawing closer. He glanced around as they made their way into the heart of the camp, noting the variety of women and children scattered about. There were far more here than at any of the other camps and whereas all Illyrians treated their women horribly, it wasn’t as bad here.

He sat back in the meeting and let Cassian do the talking, being merely backup if it was needed. It was all that he could do to keep his attention on the conversation but his need to leave had him restless. No sooner than his brother could turn to leave the tent, Azriel beat him to it. They all knew how he felt so Cassian continued on behind him in silence as they gauged the training.

They hadn’t made it halfway to the training rings before a body collided with his. He took a step back before kneeling down and extending a hand to help. When you looked up at him, he noted the beauty in you that was much different than any other Illyrian female. You smiled sheepishly at him but placed your hand into his. His eyes scanned over you briefly and hoped that you didn’t notice it but when he met your gaze again, you were grinning. It took him off guard because everyone in the camps usually shied away from him but here you were, unafraid of his intimidating stare.

“Thank you,” you said breathlessly.

“You’re welcome,” he mumbled as his eyes locked on your hand that you hadn’t pulled away.

“I’m Y/N.” You gave him a smile that he could have sworn was apologetic. “Sorry about-”

“Y/N!!”

You spun on your heels to see the male calling your name. He watched your body go tense and could taste the fear coming off of you in waves. There were similarities between you and the male and judging by the scowl, you weren’t treated well at home. The male grabbed your wrist with an iron grip that caused you to wince and he instantly bristled in anger. This was one of the main reasons that he hated being around other Illyrians.

“I was just going to-”

“I hope you had the good decency to apologize for your carelessness,” the male growled as he pulled on you.

He wasn’t sure why it was you in particular that he suddenly felt so protective of but chalked it up to the fact that he usually didn’t see the mistreatment right in front of him. Without thinking, he wrapped his hand around the male’s wrist with a force that had him immediately letting go. A growl escaped him and the man that he assumed was your father stumbled backwards.

“You can leave,” he snapped and the male had enough of his own sense to scurry away.

“Thank you,” you whispered, your voice soft as you rubbed your wrist.

“Pleased to be of service,” he replied drily, earning another smile from you.

“I really didn’t mean to run into you.”

Glancing behind him, Cassian had disappeared and he wasn’t sure if he had seen the interaction. It didn’t matter either way but he suddenly didn’t have the urge to leave. There was something about you that had him debating whether he should leave or not, knowing that you would suffer repercussions once you returned home. You shifted your body when he glanced at your wings.

“Do you want to fly?” he asked suddenly, surprised with himself for such an outburst.

“I- Uh- Can’t,” you mumbled, the words almost incoherent.

“With me,” he corrected.

Azriel watched you carefully and felt hope blossom within him when you turned to look behind you. There was a hopefulness in your eyes but the reluctance was written in your body. A silent sigh of relief passed his lips when you nodded slightly. He chuckled when he grabbed you quickly and shot into the air and a quiet scream left you.

Once he leveled out in the air, your eyes immediately scanned the landscape with awe and wonder on your face. It eased some part of his heart that he hadn’t realized had tightened as he watched. There was no questioning the peace that you were now feeling for a partial experience of what you could never have yourself.

You had difficulty tearing your eyes away from the beautiful scenery as you flew in the spymaster’s arms. It was no secret who he and the general were and you had felt embarrassed that you had run into him. Surprisingly, there was no fear of him that most people had but you did feel safe for a change in his arms. Not to mention the fact that you had been even more surprised when he had scared your father off. Nobody had ever bothered to protect you and your opinion of the Night Court leaders were heightened just for that alone.

Your father was in one of his moods and nothing that you did was right in his opinion no matter if he had been drinking or not. He had screamed at you for fifteen minutes but as soon as he raised his hand, you sprinted through the door. It all led you to being able to fly even if it wasn’t your own doing before Azriel landed on top of one of the mountains.

“This is beautiful.”

Your breath puffed in front of you before being swept off by the wind as you stared in awe. When you looked back at him, he was watching you intently and you suddenly felt self conscious. You gave him a small smile that he returned but his gaze never left you, even as he moved closer. Warmth rolled off of him from the few inches that he left between you both and you found so much comfort in it. You couldn’t remember the last time that you felt this way and your heart begged you not to let him leave.

Thankfully, he didn’t seem to be in a hurry to get anywhere else and you ended up sitting up under a snow covered tree while he asked you questions about your life. You had been so lost in conversation that you didn’t notice at first when his hand wrapped gently around yours. The small act caused your heart to race and you had no interest in pulling it away.

Time passed you by too quickly for your liking despite the fact that enough had gone by for the sun to now be descending in the sky. By the time that he was gathering you in his arms, you were praying to the Mother that he would come back to see you again.

Azriel brushed Cassian off when he returned home and his brother began to interrogate him. He didn’t want to talk about how he was feeling, especially not when he had to figure it out himself. A quiet nagging in his heart wouldn’t let him leave without knowing more about you and he hated having to leave you alone.

He returned to the camp at any opportunity that he had and lost more sleep than he could keep up with just to see you. If what he felt for Mor was love, then what he felt for you was indescribable. It surpassed reason but he couldn’t stay away, not even when he began questioning Elain’s mating bond. The entire situation didn’t make any sense to him, especially when he felt sour when he thought about it.

“Oh, gods!”

His heart skipped a beat at the sound of your voice. He had just gotten back from rescuing Elain from Hybern’s army and the last person that he expected to see was you as he was being forced into one of the healing tents for his injuries. You watched him with caution, tears lining your eyes while you took in every injury that he had. It caused his heart to clench as his love for you spread through him.

“What are you doing here?” The question came out as if he was out of breath, as if he hadn’t had time to come down from the adrenaline rush. “We’re in the middle of a-”

“War? Yea, I noticed,” you replied, staring pointedly at him. “I’m here helping out. I’m nothing spectacular but I can still help with some parts of the healing process.”

Your words hit him like a stone to the chest. He wanted so badly for you to see yourself differently but he was momentarily stunned into silence as you approached him. You knelt before him and began the process of washing the blood off of him. Every touch was surprisingly gentle even though he could barely think through the close proximity. It didn’t make much sense to him since the both of you were always close together whenever he visited but it was somehow different this time.

“You are.” His throat felt tight and the burning in his eyes started when he remembered that you were treated horribly by his own people. “More than you know.”

Your eyes flicked to his and there were still unshed tears in your eyes. He watched your throat bob before you ducked your head down to continue cleaning and wrapping his injuries. There was nothing that he wouldn’t give to know what you were thinking but he didn’t have time to question you before Rhysand walked in.

“Y/N?” The High Lord raised a brow at her as she looked sheepishly at him. “I thought you were going to bed.”

“Well, I was but I heard Thesan saying that someone was injured and a healer was coming so I thought that I’d help out.” All of the words escaped you all in one breath as you shifted in what he assumed was worry. “I didn’t think it would hurt to help one more person.”

“You’ve been working hard all day,” his brother replied gently, his eyes darting between the two of you. “Although I have to admit that my shadowsinger is in good hands.”

“I’m doing all that I can,” you laughed quietly, the sound causing his heart to clench. “I promise I’m done for the night once I’m done here.”

The High Lord nodded, his face still tender but when you looked away, there was mischief in his eyes. Azriel blocked it out and his attention refocused fully on you. His injuries weren’t as bad as he thought and definitely weren’t anywhere near as bad as his wings were. She took note of said wings before meeting his gaze.

“I wish I could do something to help,” you muttered. “I wish I had some form of special healing magic and-”

“You’re special just as you are.”

Your eyes went wide in surprise and despite his pain, he stood and pulled you up with him. He pulled you into him, enjoying your warmth against him that suddenly had him feeling ten times better. There was an underlying feeling that he couldn’t describe pulling at his heart and he was content to stay like this for the rest of his life.

It wasn’t until Elain suddenly returned to his mind that he pulled away. In no way would it be fair to you to string you along whenever he was sure that the Cauldron had been wrong. He took a step back and the sudden pain in your gaze had him taking a deep breath.

“You really should get some rest,” he mumbled as he took a few more steps back to place distance between the both of you. “Thank you for your help.”

A simple nod was all that he got before you ran from the tent, taking a piece of his heart along with you.

You couldn’t wrap your head around what the shift in Azriel was about. His heart had picked up its pace just before he pulled away from you. It was unusual for him to do so unless it was time for you to part ways but something about it was different this time. The feeling felt more like a goodbye and it was one thing in particular that you had a hard time swallowing.

“Hey, Y/N!”

You turned to see who was calling for you and it was the exceptionally good looking Illyrian that had flirted with you earlier while you tended to his minor wounds. A thought passed your mind that you would enjoy the attention from him in hopes that it would drive your thoughts away from the shadowsinger.

“You look like you’re healing well,” you laughed, suddenly feeling shy as his full attention stayed on you as he moved closer.

“I think I have one that needs to be rewrapped if you don’t mind taking a look at it.”

You knew what the underlying meaning was and you also knew that it was wrong. Despite that, you followed him to the tent with the intention to forget and chase away the weight that came with war.

The male was already gone from his tent the next morning and you were surprised that you had slept in a bit longer than you meant to. By the time you were up and dressed, you could hear the war beginning. You simply stood with the other healers and waited and watched with both dread and hope.

There was so much work to be done when it was over that you didn’t have time to look for the male that you had so desperately fallen in love with. It did hurt your heart a bit when you were told that both your father and brother had died in the war but you weren’t particularly sorry for it. There was even a tinge of pain when the male that you had fallen into bed with was announced deceased as well.

You made a half hearted attempt to look for Azriel but had given up when it seemed like he had disappeared. If nothing else told you that it was truly an act of farewell, the fact that he was staying hidden from you did. With a sigh, you followed one of your close friends back to your camp.

It was strange returning home to an empty house but there was a sense of relief knowing that you would no longer be critiqued about every little thing that you did. A passing thought of being forced unwillingly into a marriage crossed your mind. That thought officially left your mind a month later when your best friend, Iris, found you on the outskirts of the camp by the bushes as you lost your stomach for the third time that day.

“You’re..” The sound of Iris sniffing came from behind you as the female rubbed your back soothingly. “You’re pregnant.”

“What!?”

You spun so quickly that it had your head spinning and you vomited yet again. High Fae had an incredibly hard time having children but it appeared that the lesser ones didn’t. Azriel came to your mind again, the thought of him hurting you just as much as before. There wasn’t a day that went by that you didn’t think about him and it didn’t tear your heart into.

You were foolish to think that someone as important and special as he was to actually want you just as much as you wanted him. Even if he had, you highly doubted that he would now that you were carrying a deceased male’s child. That thought also hurt because your child would grow up without a father and be shunned because he was a bastard child.

Iris was there for you throughout the entire pregnancy no matter what was said about either of you. She was a great friend and you couldn’t be any more thankful for her. She was due to be wed a week before you gave birth and for that, you were thankful as well.

The labor was long and hard but thankfully successful either way and as you held your newborn son in your hands, you felt a love like no other in the world.

Azriel had questioned Elain’s mating bond for four years and even after that, he fell in love with her. Or at least he thought that he had. He had been sure that he was the one meant for her since his brothers had been mated to the female’s sisters. Most of the time, he sat in the garden with her while she chatted away in happiness. There had been a change in her over the last couple of months as she began to spend time with her mate.

He didn’t have much in common with her and no matter how much time had passed, he still couldn’t get you off of his mind. He felt horrible for disappearing on you without a word but at the time, he felt that it was the best course of action. You deserved to be loved and appreciated but what you deserved more was an explanation. He had never been good with expressing his emotions but he should have tried harder with you.

“- And Lucien says that the scenery in Spring Court is beautiful.”

His thoughts of you had tuned out Elain’s one sided conversation but the fact that she was talking about her mate and not him made him feel at ease. He hoped that he wouldn’t be breaking her heart as he had undoubtedly done yours. Then again, there was also the possibility that you may have very well been married off since your father and brother had passed in the war. You deserved happiness but he desperately wanted to be the one to give that to you.

“Where have your thoughts gone to?” Elain asked, watching him with a curious gaze.

“I met someone a few years back,” he admitted quietly while gauging her reaction.

“A she?”

“Yes.”

Elain fell silent but it wasn’t filled with tension as he had dreaded that it would be. Instead, she appeared thoughtful before her gaze fell upon him again, eyes full of questions. He didn’t know how much information that he would give her but he felt the sudden need to talk about you to someone. Anyone.

“Who is she?” she finally asked, setting down her gardening tool to give him her full attention.

“Y/N.” Your name falling past his lips had him ready to shoot into the skies and fly to you as fast as he could. “I met her in one of the camps before the war.”

“And you love her.” It wasn’t a question but a frown fell on her face. “Why haven’t you said anything to anyone?”

“She deserves better.” A half lie but a shiver ran up his spine as he forced himself to be vulnerable. “She has probably found it after all of these years.”

“You’re a great male,” Elain reassured, giving him a small smile. “My opinion may not matter much but I think that you should at least go talk to her.”

He took a few moments to ponder his choices and what he could possibly say to you to make things better. Elain watched him with that same reassuring smile so he took to the skies before he could think any more about it. His heart pounded hard in his chest during the entire flight, his nerves on edge for whatever could happen.

There were many wary glances thrown in his direction when he landed but he paid them no mind as he let his intuition guide him to you. His first stop was your home and unfortunately, you didn’t answer the door. As he turned back to head back towards the heart of the camp, he was truly beginning to wonder if you had married. The thought hurt but he deserved it if that was the case.

No sooner than he reached the first market stall, the faintest hint of your scent filled his senses. His eyes scanned the small crowd and quickly found you with a small child by your side, a hand gripped tightly around yours. As if you could sense him, your wide eyes met his and it was in that moment that you overtook all of his senses.

The Illyrians around him faded into nothing as that golden thread that now bound the two of you together shined brightly on his end. You gave him a small, shy smile but didn’t make a move to step closer. He let his gaze drift to the child as you picked him up and he noted everything about him quickly.

The boy had every feature of an Illyrian so to him, it meant that you had moved on. He didn’t deserve the explanation that he wanted but found himself hopeful whenever you walked towards him. Instead of directly addressing him, you simply nodded your head to your home. He followed closely behind while glaring at anyone who dared look at you too long or with disdain.

“We haven’t seen you or Cassian in a while,” you started as the three of you entered the home and sat the boy down. “Come to check on training?”

“I came to see you,” he admitted, shifting on his feet in his nervous state. “I didn’t- I didn’t handle it right.”

“Go play, sweetheart,” you muttered to the boy who did as told before you turned back to him. “I get it. I’m not-”

“You are everything,” he growled softly once he was close enough to cup your face. “I was foolish to let you go.”

“Az-”

“No.” His voice was thick again from his throat tightening, his nerves at an all time high as the bond sang inside of him. “I love you and I always have. But you deserve so much better.”

“I could say the same about you,” you whispered as tears lined your eyes again. “Nobody wants a female with a bastard son much less an Illyrian female with one.”

“He’s beautiful,” he murmured. “Any male would be foolish for letting you go. Just as I was.”

“You deserve better and-”

Azriel cut her off by crashing his lips to hers and his heart warmed at how you melted into him. He had come with the intention to win you back at all costs only to find out that you were his mate. It truly was a feeling like no other, an experience that could never be described without doing it justice. Little feet could be heard so you pulled back quickly and place a few feet of distance between the two of you.

“Mama.” The boy peered curiously around the corner, eyes moving between the both of you. “Who’s that?”

“Aeden, this is Azriel.” You smiled tenderly at the boy before looking at him. “Az, this is Aeden.”

“Hey!” Aeden exclaimed happily but turned back to his mother. “Eat and fly!”

“We can eat,” you laughed softly, stretching your hand out towards him. “We can look again for someone to help you fly.”

His heart was now a puddle on the floor. You had a son that more than likely didn’t know a thing about flying at his young age. Aeden’s Illyrian instincts were already screaming at him to learn how to fly and there was seemingly no one to teach him. His brain began nagging him but he wasn’t sure how to voice what he wanted to say.

“There’s no one that will help him fly?” he asked quietly when you joined him on the couch while the boy ate.

“No,” you answered with an equally quiet tone. “Nobody quite wants to be around us due to the circumstances. Not even my best friend’s husband.”

“Come to Velaris.” The words escaped him before he had time to realize what he was thinking. “You would both be loved and me, Cass, and Rhys can teach him how to fly. He’d love Nyx.”

You assessed him for a moment and placed a quick kiss against his lips before your son could see. Relief flooded through him when you nodded your head, leaving him feeling better than he had ever before in his life.

You stood in the foyer of the place that Azriel called home, contemplating everything that had led you here. It wasn’t that you weren’t grateful and appreciated his offer but it was because of how out of place that you felt. A townhouse was somewhere that you would have never guessed that you would ever call home. You had barely had time to agree before the shadowsinger was reassuring you tenderly all while offering to help you pack up what was needed.

He had promised that there would be better belongings waiting for you and he hadn’t lied. You were surprised to learn that the High Lord and Lady themselves had gone out of their way to buy both you and your son some things that you needed. Something within you nagged you about the generous charity that it felt like but as you watched your son get settled, all of that went away without a trace.

“Where am I supposed to sleep?” you asked later that night, for some reason dreading the answer.

“You have a room there.” He pointed to a guest room beside Aeden’s. “Or..”

“Or what?” You raised an eyebrow at him. “Are you suggesting that I can sleep with you?”

“If- If you-” Azriel tripping over his words with a new wave of nervousness was somewhat amusing. “If you want.”

You gave him a small smile, touching his shoulder in reassurance before checking in on your son. Anticipation shot through you as you relaxed in the bath, contemplating your two options. There hadn’t been a moment of peace since you had given birth and hoped that the new environment would keep the three year old in his own bed that night. Once you were clean, you took a deep breath before knocking on the door and stepping past the threshold of his bedroom.

“I was wondering if your offer still stands,” you muttered quietly as heat rose in your cheeks.

“Please.”

There was something in his underlying plea that had your feet moving but you stopped at the edge of the bed. He watched you with patience and ended up pulling you down into the bed next to him. A laugh slipped past you as he pulled you so close into him that there wasn’t an inch separating the both of you.

“I don’t bite,” he murmured, burying his face into your hair.

“And if I wanted you to?” you countered with a coy smirk.

“That could be arranged.”

A devilish grin spread across his face before he had you on your back and it earned him a quiet laugh. You weren’t sure how long he made love to you and worshiped you in a way that no one ever had before. There were too many ‘I love yous’ passed between the both of you for you to keep up with but it had you feeling complete for the first time in your life.

You had no way to know what time it was or how long that you had slept but when you awoke, Aeden was in the bed and curled up next to Azriel. The sight had your heart fluttering in your chest so you simply laid back down and snuggled up to the pair.

A month felt as if it passed by in a blur. Azriel had waited a week before introducing you and your son to the family, seemingly impatient to teach Aeden how to fly. There were so many mornings that your son sat in your love’s lap while they read and you cooked breakfast. It was a sight that you knew that you would never get tired of seeing.

It wasn’t until you watched Azriel and Cassian making progress with Aeden after three months did you realize what true happiness was. Cassian was silly and had jokes when it came to helping the boy all while Azriel fretted like a mother hen. Feyre had mentioned once that it looked as if the male saw your son as his own and it was all that you see when you looked at him.

“He’s making really good progress.”

You glanced beside you to the High Lady as you both prepared the food for the night. A frown fell on your face as you watched Aeden fall out of the air again only to be caught by Azriel. Your son truly had made progress but your heart pounded in your chest each time you watched him make a mistake and start falling quickly towards the ground.

“I’m used to seeing different versions of the males’ training so this is definitely new for me,” you sighed. “I know Az won’t let him get hurt but still.”

“I felt the same with Nyx.”

A smile was shared between the both of you as Elain joined to help finish up the meal. Anticipation and nervousness filled you as it came time for the entire Inner Circle to come together. You had met all of them already, of course, but it felt like a new test with having them all together.

“Ready to eat!” Aedan exclaimed as he ran through the door, covered in dirt with a small scratch on his face.

“Did you let my son fall?” you asked as you looked between Azriel and Cassian.

“I turned my back for one second-”

“He’s fine,” Cassian drawled, laughing hard when his brother elbowed him in the ribs for interrupting him. “Even Feyre took a few tumbles and she’s just fine.”

“That’s different,” you huffed, glancing at your friend in hopes that she would defend you but the female simply smiled.

You shook your head in defeat and ushered your son to his seat between you and Azriel. Aedan adored the shadowsinger and looked up to him in a way that he had never experienced before. At least that was what he had told you during a late night conversation. Conversation flowed easily thanks to the family that made you feel welcomed and loved just as the spymaster had promised.

“Daddy!” Aeden exclaimed. “Want more!”

Your heart skipped a beat as your eyes went wide when you realized that your son had just called your boyfriend his father. It was unprovoked and something that hadn’t been talked about by any of them. You glanced at Azriel and as your eyes met his, your body went tense and loose all at once at the overwhelming new feeling.

“I was going to tell you,” he whispered gently with caution on his face as the bond sang between you.

All that you could do was grin cheesily at him. At that point and time, it didn’t matter that you hadn’t been informed. All that mattered was that you had found the one that you were made for and on top of that, loved your son unconditionally as well. Rounds of congratulations sounded around the both of you but you couldn’t think straight as your eyes refused to move from the hazel ones two seats across from you.

You had never thought that your life would be this good and you would go through all of the hell and heartbreak again if it meant being where you were now.

Tag list:

@amara-moonlight @allygrace74 @sidthedollface2 @historygeekqueen @hnyclover @kalulakunundrum @historygeekqueen @bubybubsters @thisblogisaboutabook @mybestfriendmademe @caroline-books @justvibbinghere @wisdomofthebrain

#azriel #azriel x reader #azriel x you #azriel acotar #azriel shadowsinger #acotar

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