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paigenoelchas-blog · 2 years ago

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Everafter Epilogues:

preparations

Author's Note:

This is a previous chapter from Feels Like Home, but it will be independent of that story and will be written as little snippets in the lives of the gang but mostly Jake and MC focused. The timeline will be erratic. This chapter, save a few edits, has been published under the main story, but I thought it would work here as a friendship tale. I have one more edited work and then there will be more chapters to come that are new snippets of their lives together. Also, if you haven't read Feels Like Home, it is now complete.

Mahri's POV:

Phil and Dan stand in the garage admiring the bike I had picked out for his Christmas present. Jake told me that the best gift that he had received was a bike from his mom on his tenth birthday. I wanted to remind him of that gift and let him know that there could still be a world filled with amazing Christmases and unbelievable happiness.

"He is not going to know how to handle this beautiful machine." Dan starts, "Are you sure I can't take this off your hands for you?"

"He is an excellent driver," I say defending Jake, My hands are on my hips.

"And this, "Phil adds, "Is an excellent bike. Well done, M."

"Thanks." I beam. I am proud of this bike, a 1977 Indian Chief. Of course, it has two seats, a priority of mine in case he decides to take me for a ride. He will. I think about the adventures that we are sure to share and smile. I also think about him in a black leather jacket with my arms wrapped tight around him and my smile widens. The bike had one previous owner and low mileage. She is a beauty, black and retro and classy... very Jake-like.

"He will love it, the lucky jerk," Dan says sincerely and nods his approval, "Did you get a helmet to match the bike? Seriously Mahr, he needs a cool helmet."

Panic sets in. Phil notices. "I can handle that for you. I know a guy. It isn't a problem. Besides, I couldn't think of the perfect gift for my buddy. This seems just right." I am so glad that Jake and Phil are friends now, and so grateful that he is dating Betty. I am also more than thankful that Dan and Jake have reconciled.

"Phil, I am impressed that you have your Christmas shopping done. three whole days beforehand." I quip and nudge him in the arm. He winks at me, understanding that I am teasing him. He is much more responsible than people give him credit for. He is also much more thoughtful since he met Betty. "Thank you, that would be amazing and if you get him a helmet, that is one more thing I don't have to stress over. I hug Phil and then Dan, "Thank you so much, thank you both so much for all of this. I haven't had friends like this in a while. I don't think Jake ever has, It means a lot to us."

Dan stiffens and clears his throat, trying to hide emotion, "When does he get his bike and how are you getting it to him?"

"I was going to blindfold him and have him see it here."

"I have a better idea," Dan blurts out, "Leave it to me. It will be there on Christmas morning. I will deliver it myself, red ribbon and all."

I nod and hug each of these wonderful friends. Quickly, their attention turns back to the bike. They continue to stand there after I turn to walk away, I am not sure they even notice I am leaving. They just stare at the bike and occasionally grunt things at each other without approaching the bike, just staying back with their arms crossed in approval. I shake my head and leave the garage. "Boys and their toys," I whisper over my shoulder. I have no idea what men think when staring at a vehicle, but these two see something I don't.

I just hope that Jake is as delighted with the bike as they are.

---------------------

Jake's POV:

The girls were supposed to be here five minutes ago. I need their help today of all days. I begin to pace. I am not nervous about my decision. I know that Mahri is the one that I want to spend all of my life with. I just want to make it perfect. I have to get this right. This is the only proposal that I will make.

While I haven't confirmed that I am planning on proposing to Mahri, Betty knows. She knows everything and never stops reminding me of that. Confidence like that is a gift and someone who can have that without making other people feel small is a wonderful thing. Betty is incredible and I am so glad for our long friendship.

However deep her intuition is, I don't think my affection for Mahri is a very well-kept secret. I am utterly at her disposal.

I also know that Jessy has an idea that I am going to propose. I know that she will be overjoyed. Her friendship is one of the rare sorts that truly delights in the happiness of her friends. Mahri's joy will fill her up. I am glad that the two of us are at a place where she can trust me with Mari's heart. We have become good friends, closer than that, I suppose. I am lucky to have two such tremendous women in my life. Three of course, if you count Mahri.

I am about to text Betty to ask her location when I hear her laughter and see her peek around the corner, arms interlinked with Jessy. They are in the middle of a discussion, no doubt about Dan or Phil. Their faces light up like two women in love. I can't help but smile at the sight of them.

It is odd, I think, that those two particular men occupy their hearts. But I am odd and Mahri loves me. Dan and Phil have proven themselves to be reliable and I trust them to love these women properly. It is another thing that I am thankful for this morning. Being in love makes me appreciate all of the glories of this life. It makes me appreciate love in all of its forms. Happiness may make me a sap, but I wouldn't go back to living the other way, not for all of the money in the world.

"There he is, " Betty begins. "I am surprised that you haven't called yet. We are five minutes late."

"Six minutes," I correct her, "and my hand was on the phone." Betty's smile is broad and deep, the smile of a friend who knows you inside and out. She leans over conspiratorially into Jessy's ear but whispers loud enough for me to hear, "Look at the man who is about to make the second-best decision of his life. Have you ever seen such a sap?"

I smile, "What was the best decision?" I ask, remembering that her love language is name-calling.

"It was the day you decided that we should be friends. I have carried you a long way, brother." She responds.

"Indeed you have, but I don't think I had much say in the decision. That was all you. You have always been bossy." I say, acknowledging the impact that she has had on my life. She nods in agreement, knowing that I love her for all that she has been to me and for the person that she is. "Care to help me with one more task?"

She nods again as Jessy runs up to give me a hug which I happily return. Betty slugs me in the arm before doing the same.

"I am confused about a couple of things," Betty asks blankly. "I thought you were going to ask her to move in with you? I also thought you were unsure about her response."

"I am going to ask her to move in with me before I propose. I couldn't wait to ask her any longer life is too short to waste a second. I have already waited all of my life for her. I am confident that she will comply." I answer.

Jessy giggles. I am confused.

"Comply?" Betty makes a face. "Please tell me that you aren't going to ask her to comply with your request for marriage. Not romantic, dude. Please, please tell me that you have something less formal prepared, maybe use phrases like 'I love you' or 'the sun rises and sets in your eyes.'"

"I think I have something better to say, but nothing about the sun rising. Do I need to add that?" Now I am panicking. Am I going to mess this up? Do I need a speech written? I had planned on speaking from the heart like I usually do with Mahri.

"NO!" Betty stopped me, "You don't need a speech and you will do fine. I am just razzing you. Just stay away from your big words. When you use them, it makes things seem too rehearsed and the words lose their meaning."

Jessy is nodding in the background. She finally speaks, "She adores you. There is nothing to worry about. Just tell her how you feel, she will say yes and remember this moment for the rest of her life." I begin to feel my nerves gurgle again at this thought. What if I mess this up and we are stuck with an awkward memory for the rest of our days?

Betty side-eyes Jessy, "No pressure. Just be honest. She can't resist you. I should know. I helped create the stud that you are now."

She always knows the right thing to say, "Right," I mumble with my head down. I have a lot of practical things to consider. I fidget with my keys.

Betty notices my nerves and breaks the silence, "Shall we go inside or stay out here and freeze our butts off?"

Jessy is more than excited, "Go inside of course. So, Jake, what kind of cut were you thinking of, and what metal? There is the traditional gold, white gold, platinum, titanium..." She grabs my arm and pulls me through the door.

I shrug, "Let's go see what we can find. I have the two best people with me to find the perfect ring for Mahri."

Jessy smiles and continues running through the options. I had no idea that she knew so much about this stuff. "You could do a platinum princess cut diamond, which is classic, or a...." her voice trails off as we continue inside. Betty looks at me with a pitiful smile. She knows that in about two seconds, I am going to shut down.

Betty leans in, "Hang in there, friend. This part will be over soon enough and you will be the happy sap that I have grown accustomed to." She pats me on the back as she walks ahead and tries to find an employee.

--------------

MC POV:

I finish my work quickly spurred on by the knowledge that it is the last thing I have to do until after Christmas. It is officially vacation and tonight I was ready to go out. Getting caught up after the storm has been exhausting and I can't wait to spend a few more days in bliss with Jake. I am hoping that I can stay with him over the next week and not just for Christmas.

The second I walk out of the door, I text Jake.

Mahri: Guess who is officially on vacation...

Jake: The woman I love?

Mahri: Assuming that is me, yes.

Jake: You know that it is you. It is only you. It will always be you.

Mahri: :)

Mahri: Can we go out tonight, maybe to the Aurora?

Mahri: We have been cooped up for a long time. I bought a new dress.

Jake: I have some things that I have to get done at the house.

Jake: Do you want to come over?

Jake: Wait. I have a better idea. Hang on.

Jake: I happened to run into Betty and Jessy in town. They want to know if you want to join them for a girl's night. You haven't been out with them in a while.

Mahri: You wouldn't mind?

Jake: Of course not. I love the affection that you all have for each other.

Mahri: Then I would love that. Have them text me.

That instant, I receive two texts.

Betty: Ditch that loser boyfriend of yours and hang out with us girls tonight.

Jessy: Please come hang out with us tonight. We miss you.

M: (to both women) I would love to hang out with you both. It has been too long. See you tonight, 6:30?

Jessy: Yay! I can't wait!

Betty: See you then, Sunshine. We have some things to talk about.

Jessy: I will invite the other girls as well if you are alright with that.

Betty: OOOH, new people. I love meeting new people.

I don't know whether to be scared or thrilled by that last statement. Hopefully, Jessy can prepare Betty for the three women that she is about to meet. I also hope that Betty can tame her tongue for Hannah's sake.

Then I remember how good Betty is at reading people. She is someone that I trust implicitly. My nerves turn back to excitement.

I am about to put away my phone when I think of one more thing.

Mahri: Jake?

Jake: Yes, Love.

Mahri: I won't see you tonight....

Jake: I know. I hope there aren't many more nights that we have to say that.

Mahri: Me too.

Jake: You could always stop by after and stay the night if you want.

Jake: I would always like that.

Mahri: I may be drunk, you won't like me when I am drunk and you have work in the morning.

Jake: I like you in every possible scenario. I do have work, but it would never stop me from wanting to spend the night with you.

Mahri: You are the sweetest man.

Jake: No, I am just in love with a wonderful woman. If you don't come tonight, stop by tomorrow morning. I will make you breakfast and my hangover cure.

Mahri: Love you

Jake: ...and I love you. Be safe and CALL ME if you get into trouble.

Jake: Actually, call me BEFORE you get into trouble.

Mahri: ;)

I head home to change and see the girls. I wonder if this is what my life will always be like. Will I always be surrounded by such wonderful, amazing people who love me and whom I adore? I can't imagine a better future.

My drive home is quick. I hop in the shower and change into a tight black dress. It has lace cutouts in all of the right places. The back dips to just above my ass. Jake wouldn't let me leave the house in this dress, not because he is controlling, but because we wouldn't make it that far before he ripped the dress off me. The thought makes me blush and miss him. I think maybe I will stop by the cabin tonight and add some red, very high heels that would make any boy's head spin. I can't wait to see what he thinks of me in them. I am going to have fun with the girls, but who is to say that I can't also have fun with my man?

I am on vacation after all.

------------

Jake's POV:

I wasn't entirely honest with Mahri. I am swamped, but never too busy to be with her. Mahri and I had been ignoring our friends for quite a while. It is easy to do when you are in love the way that we are. Spending time with Betty and Jessy today made me realize how much Mahri must miss them, whether she realizes it or not.

Betty and Jessy were so excited by the thought of being together that I wanted Mahri to have that chance as well.

So, after I told Mahri I was busy, I did something that I never do. I invited Dan and Phil over for dinner and poker. I even invited Thomas, the idea of him was growing on me. I had almost forgiven him for his willingness to sacrifice Mahri's life at the mines. Almost.

He is Hannah's fiancé, after all, we had to work things out eventually. I may never forgive him for his dismissive attitude toward Mahri, but we can be cordial. I am going to deal with my sisters eventually so I have to deal with him. But not tonight. Tonight is for fun and celebration.

I am nervous and excited. I haven't hosted a party. I haven't spent time with many people. I still haven't become that acquainted with social norms. To say I am slightly nervous is an understatement, but I appreciate these men who have been added to my life and hope that tonight becomes the start of a really good thing.

I feel anxious, but I channel my inner Betty and toughen up, make snacks, and set up the poker table. I make sure the beer is cold and the pizza is hot.

I take one last look around the room when I hear a knock on the door. Taking one last breath, I think about how proud Betty will be that I did this and how happy Mahri will be that I consider these men friends. I smile and open the door.

"Welcome to the cabin. Allow me to rid you of your extra cash." Phil greets me and slides inside the cabin.

#duskwood jake #jake x mc #jake duskwood #duskwood #duskwood mc #duskwood fandom #duskwood everbyte #duskwood fanfiction #duskwood jake x mc #iamjake

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ghosts-n-goblins · 5 years ago

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I love that whenever Dan Howell posts on twitter that everyone goes apeshit, literally my entire feed goes from random shit to Dan and Phil memes and fanart in under an hour. I fucking love it sjsdjskebkwk

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collectorscorner · 5 years ago

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danfanciesphil · 6 years ago

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too high (can’t come down) by @danfanciesphil

Suspending himself 7,000 feet above the rest of the world seems likely to be a sure-fire way for Dan to escape normality, and isolate himself for the foreseeable future. The Secret of the Alps, a small hotel tucked into the side of the Swiss mountains is too niche for most avid adventurers to have heard of, making it the perfect place for Dan to work as he sorts through his problems. Unfortunately, privacy is a coveted thing, and as Dan soon finds out, the hotel harbours one guest who values it more than most.

Rating: Explicit Tags: Enemies to lovers, snow, mountains, skiing, hostility, slow burn, secrecy, longing, repression, nobility, classism, cheating, eventual sex

Ao3 Link

Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five Chapter Six Chapter Seven Chapter Eight Chapter Nine Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

*Warning: This chapter has a mild reference to an eating disorder. Nothing graphic, and nothing more than a mention of past issues with it. But if you are easily triggered, maybe avoid this chapter.*

Three hours later, Kaspar is departing after a quick check around the hotel to see if anything needs repairing - “Little Dan, your handyman skills are excellent! You wound up Mona’s big ugly clock, and fixed all her trinkets! I am impressed!” - and then loading the cable car with around twenty large bags from the outside bins, which he does once a month.

“I am in for a smelly ride!” he shouts cheerily as he squeezes into the cable car amongst the bags, and waves to Louise and Dan as if he’s a child on a merry-go-round waving to his mum and dad. “See you soon, friends! Please do tell lovely Mona I think of her constantly, and send kisses upon kisses!”

Louise leads Dan back upstairs then, sits him down in a chair in the mezzanine, and brings him a freshly baked cupcake. He blinks down at the treat once it’s placed in front of him, pleased but bewildered.

“What’s this for?” He picks up the cupcake anyway, marvelling at the swirled peak of blue frosting. His mouth waters as he peels off the paper case.

“Well, I was hoping to get a smile out of you,” Louise says, pulling a chair around to sit beside him. She rests her chin in her hand on the table, and looks at him with obvious concern. “But perhaps I’m dreaming too big.”

Dan sinks his teeth into the cupcake. It tastes like sweet relief. “Unfghh,” he says, eyes falling shut. “Sensational.”

When his eyes reopen, it’s to Louise’s pleased smile, but her worry lines peek through, betraying her. “Was it that bad?” she asks.

“Meeting Nikolai?” Dan asks, and wrinkles his nose, contemplating the question. “Meh. I’m used to dealing with snobby wankers at this point. Though he makes Phil seem like a peach.”

“No, not that,” Louise says. “Obviously he’s a Royal pain. Could you tell he doesn’t remember my name? He learns it once and makes a big show out of using it, but after that you’re less than dirt to him, though he tries not to let it show.”

“Dick,” Dan says firmly, then takes another bite of fluffy, crumbly goodness.

“But I meant the weekend, Dan,” Louise says, apparently not willing to let this drop. “I knew you could handle it, but I did worry. What with all the... friction between you and Mr Novokoric.” She pauses, eyebrow arched, perhaps to give Dan a chance to jump in, which he doesn’t, instead opting to finish off the cake. “Did something happen? Another argument?”

At her first question, Dan almost chokes, but is quickly placated by her second. He thinks about pretending that nothing whatsoever occurred, that they barely glanced at each other in three whole days, but decides quickly that it would be far less believable that things went totally smoothly.

He shrugs one shoulder, trying to exude nonchalance, then licks his fingers of crumbs. “Some minor disagreements. He called me bony.”

Best way to disguise a lie is to conceal it in truth. That’s what Dan’s always found, anyway. The admission makes Louise laugh, and mercifully she seems to relax. “Struck a nerve, did he?”

“I have a perfectly normal amount of bones, thanks very much.”

She titters again, then eyes him curiously. “Anything else? You were alone up here for three days together. I half expected to walk in on a crime scene.”

Dan can feel the traitorous blush creeping into his cheeks, and he shrugs again, trying to think of something that will appease her. Perhaps he should give her a small nugget of the real story. The shock of it might be enough all on its own to get her to ease off.

“We, uh, went skiing,” Dan tries. “Briefly.”

She balks at once, lipsticked mouth falling wide. “You what?!”

Okay, perhaps that nugget wasn’t the best one to choose. Dan winces at her obvious flare of anger. “I know it’s against the rules, but Phil’s super experienced. And anyway he practically dragged me out the door!”

“Do you even have skis?”

Dan hesitates, biting his lip. No point trying to backtrack now. “Phil lent me his new ones.”

A weighted blanket falls over the conversation then. It feels like Louise is scrutinising him, for some reason he can’t put his finger on. As if he’s accidentally revealed that he has gills beneath his shirt collar, and she’s spotted them peeking out.

“Did he now,” Louise murmurs. It doesn’t seem to be a question.

In the hopes of lifting the quilt of this weird new atmosphere, Dan decides a change of subject is in order. “Anyway, enough about me and dick-brain. How was it with Pearl?”

Despite her obvious reservations, Louise’s smile breaks through upon hearing her daughter’s name. Relieved to be off the hook for now, Dan listens avidly to Louise as she gushes about her little girl, about how she’s grown, about her predictable but adorable three-year-old interests - Frozen, My Little Pony, Peppa Pig, etc - and sits patiently smiling at photo after photo of the blonde toddler, beaming her gap teeth at the camera, ribbons decorating the wavy locks she inherited from her mother.

It starts getting dark eventually, he and Louise still talking about nothing much at all. It’s so pleasant, just sitting with her and laughing, bantering about life, sipping coffee and eating cupcakes, that Dan doesn’t even realise he’s stalling until Louise points out how long they’ve been doing just that. Reluctantly, Dan starts to extricate himself from the conversation, mind wandering to all the tasks he needs to accomplish. He hasn’t swept the balcony since the storm, and the lobby could do with a mop and tidy after all the hoards of people traipsing through it today.

“Oh, by the way,” Louise says, scooping cake crumbs off the table into her hand. “I don’t know if Mona mentioned, but as we don’t get a lot of opportunities to get into Mr Nov- I mean, Phil’s room, we usually snatch any chance we get as soon as he’s gone for any length of time.”

Dan sends Louise a puzzled look, and she chuckles.

“To change the bed and the bins and everything. He doesn’t let us do it normally. So might be an idea to go and give it a spring clean.”

“Ugh, do I have to?” Dan asks, dreading the idea of re-entering the scene of what feels like his very recent crime.

“You should go in just to have a nose around,” Louise tells him with a reticent grin. “You’ll never believe the size of his suite.”

Dan shrugs, picturing the untidy floorplan of room eight, already moving to the stairs. “The bed takes up most of it.”

He’s already up the second flight of stairs before he realises he’s probably let slip a little too much.

After three trips up and down the three flights of stairs, carrying dirty mugs, sheets, towels, and rubbish, Dan finally gets Phil’s room to a point where he can begin rebuilding. Phil Novokoric has the only King-sized bed in the entire hotel, so there are just two sets of bedding big enough to fit. After half an hour of searching, Dan is still unable to locate the second set, so he gives up, resigning himself to waiting until the sheets currently in the wash are clean and dry.

Knelt in Phil’s ensuite bathroom, scrubbing the glass pane of the shower, Dan is not feeling particularly warm towards the man. The bathroom isn’t dirty exactly, but it’s clear that it’s been a while since the sinks and bath have been properly scrubbed and bleached. By the time he’s done, he’s too exhausted to think about re-dressing the bed or lining the wastepaper bins. Instead, he goes down to Louise, wrung out and pissed off, to complain and beg her for snacks.

“I don’t know where you put them all,” Louise says as she hands Dan another cupcake - his third. “Phil’s right, you’re all bones.”

Dan shoots her a glare, but given that he has blue frosting smeared across his mouth, he doubts it’s particularly menacing. “He’s one to talk, he never eats anything. I practically had to force soup and pizza down his throat.”

She’s quiet for a minute, folding tea towels. “He ate soup and pizza?”

“Only after I yelled at him.”

Her mouth quirks. “What did you say?”

“Something like…” Dan tilts his head, trying to remember. The events of last night somewhat obliterated the rest of the day from his memory. “‘Starving yourself isn’t cute or impressive and I won’t be fired for your valiant attempt at martyrdom.’ Roughly.”

Louise stops folding, then leans against the counter. “And that worked?”

There’s something amiss in her tone. “Apparently. Why?”

She catches a strand of blonde curl in her fingers and twirls it. “I don’t know the extent of it, but I understand he has a tricky relationship with food. His brother, who used to be his PA, told me that once.”

Guilt lashes through Dan like he’s been whipped. “Oh. Shit, wow. I didn’t know.”

“I don’t think it’s as bad as it once was, judging from what Martyn told me,” Louise says with a shrug. “He only said something to me so that I wouldn’t push him to eat, or say the wrong thing. If you ask me, it was probably a sort of rebellion on Phil’s part, to do with all that awful Royalty training he had to go through. Can’t imagine the sorts of things they put him through.” She grimaces, and Dan replays some of the conversation he had with Phil last night, about nose jobs and personality bleaching. “You know, he told me once that they made him do something called ‘kidnap situation training’,” Louise says, clearly not noticing the anvil of guilt Dan’s struggling not to be crushed under. “They stage a kidnapping when he least expects it, take him to an unknown location and he has to get out of it using self-defense and mediation. And they use live ammunition to simulate reality. I mean, obviously they’re experts in avoiding actually shooting him, but can you imagine? It must be terrifying. And he has no choice. He’s forced to do undergo these crazy exercises because he married Nikolai so fast. He probably had no idea what he was signing up for, the poor kid.”

The impossible weight of the anvil buckles Dan’s knees. He feels himself crumble under its mass, slowly, and he has to discreetly grip the lip of the worktop to stop himself from slipping to the ground. Twenty-one, Phil had said. That’s how old he was when he was swept off his feet by a charlatan promising a life of love and luxury, and consequently forced through a complete physical and personal re-design, then locked away up a mountain. Is it any wonder he’s so moody, so snippy, so sad? And along comes Dan, griping and pestering him at every turn, telling him off for things he can’t help, for things he’s been traumatised by.

“I should…” Dan mutters, pushing away from the counter, only to wobble on unsteady legs. “I should get on. Lots to do still.”

“Are you alright?” Louise asks, slipping effortlessly into concerned-mother-mode. She lifts a hand to his forehead, and he shrinks away. “You’re all pale suddenly.”

“I’m fine,” Dan tells her, managing a tight smile. He walks briskly to the door. “Just… got a load to do before, um, before Mona gets back.”

“She won’t be back today,” Louise says, frowning.

Dan shrugs, already at the kitchen door. “Still. Best to prepare. See you later.”

“He’s alright, you know Dan.” Her voice is soft, careful. It makes him pause, halfway through the door. “He made a bad choice, I’d say, but he’s not completely without a brain.”

“A dick-brain,” Dan says half-heartedly, though he still feels wretched.

“Better than nothing,” Louise says.

Dan doesn’t know how to reply, so he nods, swallowing something acrid and bitter, then pushes out of the kitchen.

An unfamilar noise splits through the silent crackle of the night, burrowing beneath the thin skin of Dan’s light slumber, and waking him. His eyes are crusted and filmy with dried tears as he wrenches them open, and he scrubs a hand over them, sitting up. There is only one thought clear enough to articulate in the gloop of his viscous mind: why am I awake?

Blearily, he turns to the window, or the place he knows the window to be, given that it’s dark and his eyes have yet to adjust. Nothing seems out of place as far as he can tell. No ghostly movements in the shadows, or unusual shapes that might be demons lurking, ready to pounce. Of course, these things are impossible anyway, but Dan’s rational brain doesn’t like to be disturbed during the nighttime hours. He listens for a good minute or two, ears straining against the thick blanketing silence; faintly, he thinks he can make out muffled movement from downstairs.

He sighs, thinking of Louise scuffling about, trying not to make too much noise, and reaches blindly for his phone. It’s two in the morning. Given that Louise often tells Dan she would rather watch her own legs be chewed off by ravenous wolves than disturb her slumber for anything less than an emergency, he thinks he’d better go and see what’s stirred her. As he peels back the duvet and drops his feet to the carpet, trepidation begins settling around him like a cloak. The more he wakes up, the more images his paranoid brain provides of possible situations happening below: Louise, legless and bleeding, at the mercy of an actual wolf. Some sort of mountain-dwelling-specialist burglar, currently hauling the TV down the floating stairs. A poltergeist, smashing coffee cups and tugging Louise’s curls. He’s barefoot, but it’s not cold in the over-heated hotel, so he pads out of the room and begins making his way down the stairs, wishing he’d thought to grab some kind of weapon on his way.

The shadows paint the wooden walls with hunched, crouching ghouls, warping the layout of the familiar building until Dan is disoriented enough that he has to pause on the lower landing and re-evaluate where he’s headed. Eventually he makes it to the mezzanine, and the moonlight streaming through the balcony windows illuminates things a little better. Dan looks around, thinking idly that he’s likely to find Louise in the kitchen, if anywhere. He starts towards the door, and stops suddenly, heart lurching into his throat as he catches sight of a shape curled in one of the beanbag chairs, large and too bulky to be a stray blanket.

As his eyes adjust, he’s sure he can make out the form of an actual body, and has to swallow a scream of terror. Luckily, as he’s spent the past few days staring at or thinking about a certain sweep of jet black hair, the specific hue of pale skin and big, long-fingered hands, he recognises the blob in under a second. He has to blink a few times to be sure he’s not hallucinating.

“Phil?” he asks once he’s relatively certain this is not a mirage.

Eyes flick open, and that brilliant blue shines out, caught in the wash of moonlight. “Dan.” His voice is barely a croak. He moves sluggishly into a more upright position, as if his limbs are weighted, and presses his palms to his eyes. “Ugh. Di’n’t wanna wake you up.”

Ignoring the urge to unpack that statement for now, Dan decides to tackle a more pressing confusion. “What are you doing here? How are you here?”

“Plane,” Phil says vaguely, floating a hand in the air above his head, as if Dan needs a visual aid.

“You’re supposed to be in Milan,” Dan says, utterly bewildered.

As his eyes adjust, he can see Phil is in a suit and tie, somewhat creased now, but still obviously expensive and posh. He doesn’t appear to be wearing a coat, which is concerning. Had he walked from wherever the plane landed to the hotel without one? And even then, how he got inside is a mystery. It occurs to Dan that he’s pretty sure he didn’t remember to bolt the front door, which answers that he supposes, but the rest is still completely up in the air.

“Yeah,” Phil sighs, shoulders slumping, “couldn’t bear to be parted from you, I guess.”

Despite the typical sarcastic response, there’s something off about his words; they’re all bumping together, the consonants jostling for position. It occurs to Dan that Phil’s probably drunk, as he’s been at some fancy event, and he doubts the snobs that put those together skimp on the champagne. Further interrogations can wait until he’s sober enough to speak some sense. It’s obvious that Phil is not capable of looking after himself right now, so Dan needs to get this man into bed. He contemplates how best to do this, chewing his thumbnail.

“I stripped your bed earlier,” Dan tells him in a sigh. “Your room’s not ready for you.”

“S’fine,” Phil says, toeing off his loafers and leaning back into the beanbag. “I’ll sleep here.”

Dan rolls his eyes. “Don’t be a prat. Just wait here a sec while I get the bedding.”

He descends into the dark lobby, shivering from something that doesn’t feel like cold, then ducks into the tiny laundry room to retrieve the sheets he’d washed and dried earlier. He folds it all up diligently - though not very neatly - and puts it all into a basket to bring back upstairs. As he passes through the mezzanine lounge, he inclines his head as a signal for Phil to follow him up to the top floor.

Dan walks slowly on account of his weak ankle and the dark, but he can hear Phil’s plodding, unsure footsteps behind him, careless and clumsy. Dan wonders how fast the other man’s mind is spinning, and wishes he had another set of hands to help keep him steady.

“Not far now,” Dan reminds him in a low voice, because they’re approaching the floor where Louise sleeps. “One more set of stairs.”

“Thank God you’re here, I almost forgot,” Phil mutters, though his words are so slurred that the contemptuous remark loses its potency.

In a way, it’s almost soothing to know that Phil is still lucid enough to deride him. They reach the top floor eventually, Dan’s arms aching and his ankle throbbing. He’d left Phil’s door unlocked earlier, so he pushes it open now and heads straight for the bed. Phil ambles in afterwards, moving to switch on a lamp on the bedside, which offers some yellow light that glosses the moonlight pouring in through the huge windows.

Dan sets to work immediately, pulling off the pillows and duvet in order to cover the mattress with a clean sheet. Given the size of the bed, this is no easy task, and the corners spring off twice in his haste. To his surprise, Phil begins attempting to help, moving sluggishly, but managing to hold the corners in position.

They work together silently, dressing the pillows and even stuffing the duvet into its cover. By the time it’s done, Dan’s about ready to drop, but he can feel the weight of responsibility on him right now, along with that anvil of guilt Louise heaved on his back earlier. It’s not something he can just shrug off, so despite the fact his shift doesn’t technically start for a few hours, and Phil is supposedly not his problem yet, Dan finds himself going to Phil’s small kitchenette area and finding a glass. It looks a bit smeary, but otherwise fine, so he takes it into the bathroom, rinses it out and fills it, then brings it out to Phil, who is now sat on the edge of his bed, shoulders hunched forwards, face in his hands. He still doesn’t look up to giving the full explanation Dan wants to drag out of him, so it will just have to wait until tomorrow. Not that he’ll be any more forthcoming then - he certainly doesn’t owe Dan any explanations if he doesn’t want to share.

Given that there’s no point in attempting to pry answers out of him at the moment, Dan places the glass on Phil’s bedside table and studies the man in front of him, deciding how best to approach the task of getting him into bed. Probably best to start with removing his uncomfortable outer layers, Dan decides, and reaches for Phil’s suit jacket, which he then begins shoving awkwardly down his arms. As he works the material over Phil’s biceps, Dan vaguely notes Phil’s head lifting, blue eyes squinting at him curiously.

After a moment or two, Phil asks, “um, what are you doing?”

“As fun as it would be to watch you attempt to struggle out of your clothes in your inebriated state, it’ll be a lot quicker if I help,” Dan replies, managing to pull the garment off him.

He turns to fold the jacket carefully over a chair, then spins around to find Phil fighting a smile. Dan ignores it, reaching for Phil’s shirt buttons, some of which are already undone. He works efficiently, keeping his mind focused resolutely on the action of slipping the round discs of plastic through their respective holes, and not anything about the soft, pale skin beneath slowly revealing itself.

“Dan?”

Dan tuts, wishing he’d just shut up and be helped without argument. “What?”

“I’m not drunk,” Phil says.

Dan’s fingers still. Phil’s shirt is almost entirely open, revealing the length of Phil’s lean torso in a long, deep ‘V’. “Yes you are,” Dan says stubbornly.

Phil shakes his head. “Not even slightly.”

“But... you were at that event,” Dan tries, though his stomach is squeezing, and he can already feel the blush creeping into his face.

Belatedly, Dan realises then that he’s got one knee on the mattress beside Phil’s left thigh, and the other nestled between Phil’s legs, almost pushing into his crotch. He’s essentially in Phil’s lap, methodically undressing him. For some reason, this incriminating position doesn’t seem to be anything other than mildly amusing to Phil.

“Yeah, well after about a minute of watching Nikolai schmooze a bunch of CEO’s and their wives, I knew I had to make a break for it at the first opportunity.” He shrugs; one of his hands rests absent-mindedly on Dan’s knee, like he’s not even aware of the action. “Can’t fly drunk, so I avoided the free schnapps.”

“Fly drunk...” Dan tries to process this information, and fails. “You don’t mean- you flew the plane up here?”

The corner of Phil’s mouth twitches. “And here I thought I was running out of ways to impress you.”

Dan stares into Phil’s eyes - they’re bloodshot and drooping, but the pupils are small, the irises bright and clear. He’s not lying, Dan realises. He’s stone cold sober. Too caught up in the embarrassment of having tried to undress and basically straddle a man who was totally capable, the information Phil is feeding him - that he apparently can fly planes, that he’s been trying to impress Dan of all things, that he’d escaped from Nikolai’s side to come back here at 2am - is enough to have Dan totally flummoxed. He attempts to leap backwards, to extricate himself from Phil, but Dan being who he is, trips and stumbles.

Though sluggish and inalert, Phil somehow still manages to catch him before he lands on his ass. He tugs Dan sharply forwards, and he ends up falling front-ways instead, pushing Phil until he’s toppling backwards, both hands coming down to bracket Phil on the bed.

“God, you’re insatiable tonight,” Phil jokes as Dan attempts to scramble off him, mortified. “Relax,” Phil laughs, though it sounds numb and hollow. “I’m not under any impression that you’re actually that unable to resist me.”

“Sorry, fuck,” Dan says, flushing, having rolled off Phil smartish. “I’m barely awake right now, and I thought you were sloshed and-”

Phil throws him a tired laugh. “Not sloshed, no. Just exhausted. Can barely see straight.”

Dan’s heart is jackhammering, but one look at Phil, sprawled out on his fresh bedclothes, eyes half-shut, tells Dan that this is a lot more than exhaustion. He can joke that watching Nikolai hobnobbing with a load of posh gits is enough to send him running for the door, but if Dan had to guess, he’d say something happened at that party. Something bad enough to have Phil finding the nearest plane and pointing its nose straight back up the mountain he loathes being stranded at the top of.

“Well yeah, I’d imagine,” Dan replies carefully. “Round trip to Milan and back in less than twelve hours?”

Phil doesn’t answer; Dan wonders if he’s fallen asleep. He dithers, shifting, and the mattress bounces Phil up and down.

“Don’t,” Phil mutters.

“Don’t what?”

A pause. Dan’s ears strain to hear the response. When it comes, it’s almost a whisper. “Don’t leave.”

To spare Phil the humiliation of explaining himself given his current state, Dan just nods to the otherwise empty room, and shuffles to the edge of the bed. He gets up to plump the pillows, then pulls back the duvet. He turns to prod Phil in the leg.

“Get in, then.”

When Phil immediately begins moving in accordance with Dan’s instruction, Dan tells himself it’s because he’s so tired that he’d do anything he was told. Once he’s beneath the covers, Phil shuffles around a bit until he’s shucked off his trousers, which he then pulls out in a magician-like reveal, and throws to the ground. Dan picks them up, and folds them across the chair with the jacket. They’re still warm.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Dan asks as he slides in to the other side of the bed.

“No,” Phil says half into the pillow. He sounds seconds away from unconsciousness, which is promising. Then, quietly, he says, “if you’re really gagging to know, I suggest you check the news.”

Given that Dan himself is about five years away from getting any sleep, he reaches into his pyjama pocket for his phone and opens his news app. He doesn’t even need to use the search bar. Right there, on the front page, blares the headline:

‘SIR NIKOLAI’S HUBBY THREATENS DIVORCE IN SHOCKING DISRUPTION AT CHARITY EVENT’

Dan scrolls down, already alarmed. Granted, the newspaper this particular headline belongs to could probably be best described as a tabloid, but he hasn’t the patience to look for a more reputable source of information just yet. He reads quickly, eyes darting along each line like he wants to get it over with all at once.

‘...came as a surprise to us all when Swiss bachelor Sir Nikolai Novokoric announced his marriage to Philip Lester, a Manchester-born student he’d known for less than a year. The two lovebirds married in a secret ceremony in early 2016. After a few months of being snapped canoodling at various parties and events, Sir Nikolai pulled his new man out of the spotlight, and he’s barely been seen since.

Last night at the annual European Young Person’s LGBTQ+ charity event was the first public sighting of Sir Nikolai’s husband in some time. Evidently, due to the shockingly dramatic stunt Philip pulled during his husband's speech, this absence might be the sign of trouble in paradise between the young couple.

“It’s bloody hypocritical!” Philip spat into the microphone once he’d pushed Sir Nikolai aside [see video below]. “He’s getting an award for being this charitable gay icon, but he’s exploiting his own sexuality.”

As you can see in the video, there was little chance for him to finish his impromptu rant, as he was quickly escorted off stage by security. He did however shout, as he was being pulled out of the building, that he intends to file for divorce. We’ve yet to pin down Sir Novokoric for a responding comment.’

Beneath the wall of text is a video, taken on someone’s phone by the looks of things. Dan’s thumb hovers over the play button, heart pounding. Does he really want to see this?

“Go ahead,” Phil says from beside him, making Dan jump. He’d assumed the other man was asleep by now. “The rest of the world’ll have seen it in a few hours. Why not join them.”

Dan hesitates for less than two seconds, then locks his phone, placing it on the bedside table. “I don’t go in for that tabloid bollocks.”

There’s a moment where Dan thinks Phil might smile, but he just rolls over again, fringe falling over his face. “I was dumb,” he sighs. “I shouldn’t have done that.”

“Somebody needed to,” Dan replies sniffily, thinking of Sir Nikolai’s irritating winks. “I mean, if you’re right about the exploitation,” Dan clarifies quickly. There’s no use telling Phil that he has a personal dislike for his husband. “That should be brought to people’s attention, if it’s true.”

“Well of course he’s exploiting himself,” Phil says. “And me. And anyone who identifies as gay or bi. He’s pretending he’s the Ellen Degeneres of the Swiss Royal family, happily married to his true love, when he’s actually in the Bahamas, shagging anything that moves - male or female.”

“Well, if it’s male or female-”

“Don’t,” Phil cuts in, tartly. He sits up, pushing a hand into his hair. “Are you really gonna argue, to me, that just because he’s bi, and he’s up front about it in the media, that he still deserves to be heralded as some admirable icon for the LGBT community? Why is it that just because he fancies blokes as well as girls, everyone can look past the fact he’s married? Don’t the public give a shit about what I might feel? It’s all so creepy, the way everyone pretends he’s some Saint, looking the other way when he’s caught snogging models on beaches. He’s a sociopath if you ask me. He doesn’t fuck people based on real attraction like everyone else - for him it’s all about who can get him the most publicity. Who would look best next to him in the paparazzi photos, or in the leaked sex tape.”

Dan is only able to glean bits and pieces from Phil’s rant at a time; the slew of information is startling, as is the sheer loathing coating each sentence. One thing Dan does catch though, are those last two words. “...you and Nikolai have a sex tape?”

Phil throws him a withering look, but there’s a tinge of amusement tucked into its far corner. “Not the point, Dan.”

“Sorry.” Dan sighs, sinking back into the pillows, mind spinning as it attempts to process everything. Dan doesn’t know the other side of it, has never paid attention to the public’s fawning over Nikolai, so perhaps he’s biased, but everything Phil is saying makes a worrying amount of sense. “Seems like he’s an absolute bellend,” Dan says, succinctly summarising his own responding feelings. He can hear Phil snort with laughter, and it’s nice. “Way I see it,” Dan continues, slowly allowing his words to shape around his developing stance on the matter. “He shows up here after months of nearly no communication, expecting you to play along with his plans, go right back to being the perfect little house-husband. If you ask me, it’s his own fault. Anyone in your position would have been fuming, ready to explode at the drop of a hat.”

“Yeah, but other people would probably have exploded in private,” Phil sighs, picking at the duvet cover. “You don’t get it. I’ve been in this world for a while now. I should’ve known better than to blow my lid on a damn stage like that, in front of all the press. Now the world will be on Nik’s side, and I’ll be the trashy scumbag that Kanye’d his acceptance speech and broke up with him in front of a live audience.”

Dan is silent, contemplating this. Instinctively, he reaches out and places a hand over where he thinks Phil’s knee is. Phil stares at the hand, perplexed, then turns to look Dan in the eye.

“Do you think I’m an idiot?” Phil asks, eyes round.

The bits of Dan that still reverberate with hurt from all his mean comments, and a disgust for the bourgeoise in general, tell him to say yes. Dan thinks he could say yes, if he were crueller, if he didn’t think he’d throw up after watching the glacier-blue eyes in front of him fill with tears. It’s perfectly reasonable to argue that Phil’s been an idiot since the day he put on that bloody ring.

But it’s too late. The pieces of Dan that started, days ago, to warm to Phil, to understand him, to sympathise, now form the majority of Dan’s being. He wonders if it was the same way for Phil, back in the first weeks of knowing Nikolai, as that charming grin and laser-focus on just him began chipping away at his resolve. Dan hasn’t much experience in love, but he’s beginning to suspect that even with every scrap of common sense you have at your disposal, pretty much anyone is in danger of being a complete idiot.

“No,” Dan says truthfully. He remembers Louise’s words from earlier. He made a bad choice, I’d say, but he’s not completely without a brain. She’s a lot wiser than she gets credit for. “A dick-brain, sure. But you’re not stupid.”

“I feel stupid right now.”

Dan lifts a shoulder in a half-shrug, searching for a bright side of this gloomy looking cloud above Phil’s head. “At least he can’t pretend that everything’s fine between you now,” Dan tries. “You announced to the whole world that you’re unhappy. Puts him in an awkward position if he tries to just brush it under the rug.”

Phil cocks his head, looking at Dan as if he’s never seen him before. “I didn’t think about that.” He turns away slowly, eyes unfocused as he settles back down into the pillows. “Maybe there’s a way out.”

“Get some sleep,” Dan advises, noting the exhaustion in Phil’s voice. “It’ll all seem better in the morning.”

“Mmm,” Phil says, eyes already closed.

“Can’t believe you Kanye’d him,” Dan marvels, trying to picture it. He notes the twitch of Phil’s mouth, and laughs softly. “And you weren’t even drunk.”

“They should give me a medal for not chugging a bottle of Greygoose, listening to Nik talk about morality and political change like he has any clue,” Phil says, sighing heavily.

“How’d you resist?” Dan asks affably, hoping to send Phil into dream in a lighter mood.

“Just kept thinking...” Phil mutters, trailing off.

“Thinking what?”

“Thinking that if I just didn’t drink... if I could hold on and hold on...” he breathes a long sigh, mouth falling slack, and whispers, “I could fly back to you.”

(Chapter Twelve!)

#phan #phanfic #too high #enemies to lovers au

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ayellowbirds · 6 years ago

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42 Webcomics Keshet Reads

I was recently reminded that I currently read a lot of webcomics, or have done so in the past. Here’s an incomplete list, linking to the first page where i can (which will usually mean the worst art). Organized thus: Title, Author. Genre. Format (long-format stories, short-format & single-page stories, or mixed). Description.

The Adventures of Dr. McNinja, by Christopher Hastings. Comedy, Parody, Action. A man from a long line of Irish ninjas has devoted his own life to saving lives as a doctor, disappointing his family. His staff includes a sentient but non-speaking gorilla receptionist, and eventually a boy sidekick who grew a fabulous mustache out of sheer determination. Recurring threats include fast food mascots, ghosts, wizards, ghost wizards, and a disease that turns people into giant lumberjacks. Completed.

BACK, by Anthony Clark and KC Green. Comedy, Adventure, Absurdity, Weird West. Long-Format. A cowgirl comes back from the dead with no memory of who she was or how she died, and is told by a trio of “Cool Witches” that she has to bring about the end of the world—though what exactly that means remains a mystery. Consistently excellent visual storytelling from masters of sequential art; at least one WLW pairing among the characters.

Bite Me!, by Dylan Meconis. Comedy, Horror, Historic Fiction. Long-Format. A young woman becomes a vampire amidst the chaos of the French Revolution. Featuring immortal angst, a Jewish werewolf, and sacré bleu, the chickens. Completed (website can be slow to load).

Broodhollow, by Kris Straub. Horror, Weird Fiction. Long-Format. By the creator of the original creepypasta that inspired Channel Zero. A young man abounding with neuroses and compulsions comes to a strange little town in order to settle a late relative’s estate. Themes of unreliable memories and differences of perception.

Chainsawsuit, by Kris Straub. Comedy. Short-Format. Three-panel gag comic.

ChaosLife, by A. Stiffler & K. Copeland. Slice of Life, Autobiographical. Mixed-Format. The life of a queer couple and their pets: humor, lgbt issues, mental illness (K. experiences paranoid schizophrenia), cats, and occasional puppets.

Crunchy Bunches, by Scott Warren. Comedy. Mixed-Format. Cereal mascot parody focused on snaggle-toothed feline mascot Munchy and his friends.

Dead Winter, by Allison Shabet. Action, Horror, Comedy. Long-Format. Zombie apocalypse story with occasional partially-animated scenes, and a relatively low focus on the actual zombies. Infrequent updates, but has a Patreon with weekly content.

DRIVE, by Dave Kellet. Sci-Fi, Comedy. Long-Format. Humanity has taken to the stars, led by a second Spanish Empire that controls the secrets of FTL travel. When the crew of the Machito recover their science advisor and accidentally pick up a mysterious amnesiac alien at the same time, they become embroiled in intrigue that affects the whole of human space and beyond, caught between secret police, mind-controlling invaders, and a species dedicated to invention who have a grudge against humans.

El Goonish Shive, by Dan Shive. Adventure, Sci-Fi/Fantasy, Superheroics, Slice of Life, Mad Science. Long Format. Difficult to pin down, once described as “the most squeaky-clean fetish comic online”—lots of characters undergoing fantastic transformations of their bodies. Starts out weak but gradually grew into one of the most progressive webcomics out there as the creator started to really think about the meaning of someone wanting to transform from a nerdy boy into a busty girl. I’ve said more about it, here. Significant LGBT content, including canon gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, genderfluid, and asexual characters.

Family Man, by Dylan Meconis. Historic Fiction, Horror, Romance, Libraries. Long-Format. A learned man of Jewish ancestry takes a position as a lecturer at a small Christian university in the middle of nowhere in the Germanies of the 18th century, and falls in love with the daughter of the head of the university—who has some secrets relating to her mother’s family On hiatus as of July 2017.

Freefall, by Mark Stanley. Comedy, Sci-Fi, Furry. Long-Format. A larcenous alien and his naive robot pal living on a human colony world acquire the services of an uplifted humanoid wolf as their ship’s engineer under less-than-legal circumstances. As time goes on, the crew becomes caught up in the struggles and politics of the artificial intelligences of the colony. Binge-reading page here, colored strips here.

Girl Genius, by Phil & Kaja Foglio. Gaslamp Fantasy (Not-Steampunk), Action, Comedy, Mad Science, Alternate History. Long-format. A young woman discovers that she is the latest in a line of mad scientists including the vanished heroes of Europa as well as some of its most terrible villains.

Goblins, by Ellipsis Hana Stephens. Fantasy, RPGs, Action, Body Horror. Long-format. A tribe of goblins go from being mere MOBs to taking levels as adventurers themselves, facing ambiguity about alignment, morality, and the place of "monsters” in a world that seems to favor humanoids. Can get very gory at times. Light LGBT content including a prominent gay male character; transgender creator.

Goodbye to Halos, by Valerie Halla. Fantasy, Adventure. Long Format. Forced through a gateway to another world for her own safety, Fenic finds herself in the “run-down queer district” of a city of animal people—and spends a few years coming into own identity as a trans lesbian, forging a new life. But the reasons she was forced into this world are catching up to her, and she’ll need to turn her protective streak towards defending herself. Heavy LGBT themes; often not safe for work. The only work i can think of where a trans girl’s underwear bulge is treated as a completely nonsexual and innocent thing.

Grrl Power, by Dave Barrack. Superheroes, Sci-Fi. Long Format. Probably Not Safe For Work. Comics nerd Sydney Scoville winds up becoming a superhero herself after circumstances force her to reveal her powers and join up with an agency providing training and oversight. While consistently funny and clever with the use of powers, it can be very centered on the male gaze; the art starts out being pretty . I actually first started reading it because I recognized one of the characters from years prior when the artist was posting softcore smut to furry websites.

Guilded Age, by T. Campbell & Phil Kahn, art by John & Jason Waltrip and Erica Henderson. Fantasy, RPGs, Action, MMOs. Long-Format. A group of adventurers face off against threats to their world—such as the CEO of the company that programmed their world in the first place. Strong themes of intrigue, the nature of violence, and the concept of good and evil in fantasy settings. Completed, now running extras & side stories, including annotated repeats of the original pages.

Gunnerkrigg Court, by Tom Siddell. Fantasy, Sci-Fi. Long-Format. A young girl attends a strange boarding school specializing in matters of the supernatural and obscure, making friends with classmates, a ghost, robots, psychopomps, living shadows, fairies, and eldritch horrors in the form of silly woodland creatures while exploring the mysteries of the school and her own ancestry. Shows remarkable art progression; the style of the first storyline is unrecognizable from the present. Especially rewarding if you’re into alchemy. LGBT content, including prominent WLW characters. Warnings: unreality is a recurring theme, and there is a bit of “suicidal” fairies desperate to be reincarnated as humans. Boxbot is rubbish.

Johnny Wander, by Yuko Ota & Ananth Hirsh. Autobiographical, Fantasy, Humor, Mixed-Format. A mix of slice-of-life autobiographical pages, and short stories, including the longer format “Barbarous” and “Lucky Penny”.

Kevin & Kell, by Bill Holbrook. Comedy, Slice-of-Life, Furry. Mixed-Format. Extremely long-running strip (daily updates since September of 1995). In a world of anthropomorphic animals where predatory species can legally & without repercussions hunt & consume other species, a businesswoman wolf (Kell) and her uncommonly large rabbit husband (Kevin) make their blended family work in spite of social stigma against predator/prey relationships. Far more light-hearted than it sounds, though it often touches on social issues and drama. Light LGBT content from some minor recurring characters.

Kill Six Billion Demons, by Abbadon. Fantasy, Metaphysical, Martial Arts. Long Format. A college student’s attempt at heterosexuality is interrupted by the arrival of a legendary king of all reality. Thrust into a battle over the greatest power of all worlds, Allison faces devils, angels, and the city at the center of the 777,777 universes. It’s a lot to take in. Occasionally not safe for work. Frequent LGBT content, including WLW.

Love Me Nice, by Amanda Lafrenais. Comedy, Hollywood. Long Format. Set in a world shared by cartoon characters and ‘real’ people (think Roger Rabbit), where TV star Mac T. Monkey Jr. struggles between his irresponsible instincts and his attempts to build a life as an adult and a relationship with fellow protagonist (and manager) Claire. Some LGBT content; infrequent updates. Occasionally Not Safe For Work.

Manly Guys Doing Manly Things, by Coelasquid. Comedy, Videogames, Parody. Mixed-Format. The staff of a temp agency for “ludicrously macho guys” tries to help the protagonists of video games, TV, and movies deal with their testosterone-addled brains in a constructive fashion. Occasional LGBT content—mostly MLM, naturally. Keep an eye out for the fluffy little velociraptors, and Mr. Fish the Gyarados. On indefinite hiatus since June of 2018.

Narbonic, by Shaenon K. Garrity. Comedy, Sci-Fi, Mad Science, Gerbils. Mixed-Format. Comp Sci. grad Dave needs a job. Helen B. Narbon, cute blonde mad scientist with a gerbil fixation, is hiring. Story arcs feature action-packed forensic linguistics, a worldwide conspiracy of guys with the same name, rodents uplifted to sentience, time travel. Some awkwardness around gender transformations, light LGBT content. Completed, with author annotations.

Nedroid Picture Diary, by Anthony Clark. Comedy, Absurdity. Short Format. Short comics that very quickly come to focus on the antics of the anomalous ursine orb Beartato and his friend/roommate Reginald, a bird who is just terrible.

Not Drunk Enough, by Tess Stone. Supernatural, Action, Horror. Long Format. A survival horror styled webcomic by a creator with a history of exceptionally dynamic page composition and lettering. Expect lots of magnificently weird body horror.

O Human Star, by Blue Delliquanti. Roboticist Al Sterling died. Al Sterling woke up an android body mimicking his own. As he reconnects with his former partner-in-several-senses, he explores a world that remembers him as one of its greatest innovators. Major themes of identity, the definition of humanity, and gender and sexuality. LGBT themes including MLM and transgender characters. Warning for some discussion of self-harm.

Outsider, by Jim Francis. Sci-Fi. Long Format. Beautifully-illustrated science fiction story that is painfully slow to update. If you watched a lot of 80s and 90s sci-fi anime, you’ll get the vibe that this has—including its arguable weak point of being centered on a man who finds himself among an alien race dominated by warrior women.

Patrik the Vampire, by Bree Paulsen. Supernatural, Slice-of-Life. Long Format. The unlife and history of an exceptionally awkward vampire and the mortals around him—book club, knitting, coffee shops, violent murder. Some LGBT content.

Poppy O’Possum, by I. Everett. Fantasy, Furries. Long Format. A single mother in a world of animal people where only opossums lack magic, Poppy just wants to settle down in quiet and safety with her daughter Lily. The world has other ideas—but fortunately, Poppy is mind-blowingly strong. On hiatus. Some LGBT content.

Questionable Content, by Jeph Jacques. Slice-of-Life, Comedy, Sci-Fi. Mixed-Format. Starts out focusing on indie rock fan Marten and his robotic “anthroPC” Pintsize. As the art evolves, so does the subject matter, focusing more and more on the rest of the cast and topics like the nature of personhood and identity for artificial intelligence. Eventually comes to feature significant LGBT content, including bisexual and transgender characters in the main cast.

Rae the Doe, by Olive Brinker. Comedy, Slice-of-Life. (Mostly) Short Format. If Garfield was a transgender doe and wore clothes and also there weren’t any jokes about Mondays or lasagna and the comic was constantly assumed to be autobiographical in spite of its creator frequently asserting otherwise and the comic was still genuinely funny. But otherwise just like Garfield, really.

Selkie, by Dave Warren. Sci-Fi, Slice-of-Life, Comedy, Drama. Long-Format. Former adoptee Todd becomes a father himself to a strange young girl who turns out to be a refugee from a secret underwater civilization. While the public gradually becomes aware that humans are not alone, family forms and is redefined as secrets from both Todd and Selkie’s past are revealed and dealt with, and kids confront issues of inclusion and exclusion. Also, for some reason two of the kids from Evangelion are Todd’s neighbors.

Skin Deep, by Kory Bing. Fantasy, Coming-of-Age, Monster Girls (and Boys). Michelle discovers the secret world of mythical monster people after a small medallion unlocks her own heritage as a sphinx—supposedly long-extinct, according to the other monsters. Michelle must explore who she is and her family history while also trying to avoid completely upending nonhuman society and maintaining secrets within a culture already used to the use of magical illusions and transformations. Light LGBT content.

Skin Horse, by Shaenon Garrity. Comedy, Sci-Fi, Mad Science, Zombies, Canadians. Mixed-Format. Set in the same universe as Narbonic (see above), “Skin Horse” follows an organization of the same name dedicated to providing social services to beings only recognized by the secret shadow government—staffed by a patchwork zombie bioweapon, a talking sled dog, a cross-dressing pansexual psychologist, and a receptionist in the form of an immobile Victorian robotic weapon of mass destruction, all overseen by a sentient swarm of bees. Frequent LGBT content.

Something*Positive, by RK Milholland. Comedy, Slice-of-Live, Parody. Mixed-Format. Very long-running comic that gradually grows from a dark and misanthropic sense of humor into a dark and misanthropic sense of humor with a warm and gooey center. Earlier comics can be pretty weak and handle many subjects very poorly (the first strip, linked above, features an abortion “joke”); gradually improves.in terms of LGBT representation to the point that it’s one of the better webcomics in that regard. I might recommend skipping ahead in the archives to the current decade (the “1937″ and “1938″ are strips flashing back to the previous generations).

Spacetrawler, by Christopher Baldwin. Sci-Fi, Comedy. Long-Format. The naive but brilliant alien race known as the Eebs are enslaved by interplanetary society at large, depending on their servile nature to maintain the high standard of technology and transportation across the void of space. A group of utterly incompetent aliens come to Earth to seek help in freeing the Eebs... and generally fuck everything up for the best with their terrible choices of sample humans. Currently in the midst of a sequel series focusing on new intrigue and antics, including a talking, murderous kangaroo.

Spinnerette, by Krakow Studios. Superheroes, Comedy, Sci-Fi. Mixed-Format. A grad student develops spider-themed superpowers—including extra arms—and attempts to navigate both concealing her transformation, and becoming a superhero in a world where super-powered vigilantes and criminals are a fact of life. Not Work-Safe due to suggestive artwork including improbably form-fitting costumes over improbably large bosoms. Recurring LGBT content.

Val & Isaac, by @tredlocity. Sci-Fi, Fantasy, Comedy. Mixed-Format. A space mercenary, her wizard buddy, and the cyborg fish girl who keeps all their technology functional, occasionally featuring their shapeshifting assassin friend Space Dread. Major LGBT content, including WLW and MLM, and a prominent transgender character.

Vattu, by Evan Dahm. Fantasy, Worldbuilding. Long-Format. Born to the Fluters of the grasslands, Vattu finds her traditional subsistence lifestyle torn away as a multi-species empire asserts a claim over her people’s lands. A fantasy epic with several major arcs; see also the creator’s earlier completed works Rice Boy and Order of Tales.

XKCD, by Randall Munroe. Science, Parody, Comedy. Short Format. Stick figures and scientific silliness. Make a point of checking the alt-text of each comic by moving your cursor over the strip. Early pages are much more along the lines of experimental sketches; link above directs to a random comic in the archives. Some comics are more along the lines of interactive games!

Yet Another Fantasy Gamer Comic (YAFGC), by Rich Morris. Fantasy, Comedy, Parody. Mixed-Format. Not Work-Safe. The inhabitants of a world heavily based in Dungeons & Dragons go about their lives as monsters, humanoids, and soul-searching mixes of the two. Begins with a romance between a beholder and a goblin, gradually builds up to battles between nations and the gods themselves, while also finding time to explore family, loss and love, and whether kobolds count as sapient. Moderate LGBT content including recurring gay & bisexual characters (it’s a very large cast); new readers guide here.

#long post #webcomics

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dansoftwell · 7 years ago

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Phil Lester's natal chart

note: as I said in dan's chart, this is a collection of information that i got, analyzed, classified and tried to put the most important things that make sense. that's why I put differents aspects of each one.

Introduction: Astrological studies describe many of the character traits and they sometimes go deeper into the understanding of a personality. Please, always keep in mind that human beings are continuously evolving and that many parts of our psychological structures are likely to be expressed later, after having undergone significant life's experiences. It is advised to read a portrait with hindsight in order to appreciate its astrological content. Under this condition, you will be able to take full advantage of this type of study.

Phil's planets and positions

• Sagittarius Rising: astrological Identity, as other see him.

Other people see him as a good sport and a good friend, but possibly one who is not always consistent and dependable. He may also be seen as a wise person, since does not get bogged down in pettiness and trivialities. He appears to be able to communicate a larger way of looking at situations and for ways of opening up new pathways. Others see him as a person who believes in miracles and grace, or just plain good luck: as someone who never gives up on life, and who will inspire and encourage others to keep looking forward. Others may feel that has his feet planteds firmly on the ground, but with his eyes in the skies. He needs constant challenges and goals to stimulate him. Is only comfortable with a positive, enthusiastic, and happy outlook, even when the facts are contrary. He needs to feel that everything will turn out okay in order to deal with life as it is. He may go his way with a happy-go-lucky manner, showing great enthusiasm and adaptability. Has a philosophical attitude and strong religious nature. Most of all, he wants to experience life. Never wants to be limited--he cannot stands shackles of any kind. He may hesitate to settle into any kind of lifestyle for this reason.

He's a nature lover, and his religious nature may find great expression through meditation on universal nature. He's likely to get the same kind of feeling from a beautiful sunset as some others get from more traditional religious experiences. He can wax philosophical, and are firmly convinced that better things are just around the corner.

Others will expect much from him, for his natural optimism is likely to make him an overachiever, constantly setting unrealistic goals for himself (and others), which, with luck, he just might be able to pull off. His enthusiasm will inspire others, but he needs to be aware that he tends to expect them to adopt his attitude lest he be disappointed in them. He also needs to watch his tendency to exaggerate in order to make reality seem more desirable and goals more easily achieved. He could be successful in more than one career. When has truly mastered something needs to go on to new activity. His natural optimism coupled with his curiosity and ability to influence and inspire others are all leadership traits.

He has difficulty understanding man's inhumanity to man, and he's likely to get involved with causes relating to intolerance and discrimination. Though some persons may see him as a "good catch", he needs to be especially careful in relationships. He's only interested in someone who intrigues him, but needs a stimulating, truly intellectual partner for any kind of long term companion. Needs for freedom will make him miserable if he feels trapped in a relationship. He cannot tolerate being caged for very long, and friends and loved ones must respect his need for freedom of movement. Binding commitments and responsibilities often weigh heavily upon him and he may resist "growing up" and taking on the limitations of adult life. He probably will appear young and fresh all his life. It's difficult to get him down, but when this happens he's likely to hide it very well with his natural optimism. Seldom he lose anyone from his life unless he walks away, for him he usually is forgiven even unforgivable behavior. He seems to do everything with wild abandon, and can outlast almost everyone around.

The Ascendant is in Sagittarius and the ruler of the Ascendant is Jupiter, in Pisces: his behaviour

Psychologically speaking, his nature is extroverted and independent, oriented towards expansion and sociability. Has the soul of a leader, energetic and active. His charisma and drive are fully integrated into the collective life. Indeed, as an action-oriented fire sign, he challenge himself and he succeeds in accomplishing the task straight away. Sagittarius is hard to follow because his spirit and his independent mind constantly prompt him to go further and higher.As he's born under this sign, he's charismatic, fiery, energetic, likeable, benevolent, tidy, jovial, optimistic, extroverted, amusing, straightforward, demonstrative, charming, independent, adventurous, straightforward, bold, exuberant, freedom-loving. But he may also be irascible, selfish, authoritarian, inconsistent, unfaithful, brutal, unreliable, reckless, tactless or unpleasant.

In love, is the mobile fire that consumes everything in his way. He's constantly in love, is passionate and his energy and extroversion create a love life that could fit a serialized novel: mobile and changing, he is not the man of a single person, at least until he finds the person who resists him and who arouses a love powerful enough to tame him.

Himself image and personal interests

Sun in Aquarius and Moon in Aquarius

This personality indicates an individual who loves freedom, fun, and independence. Can be eccentric, with original ideas. He's inventive, scientific, and analytical. He could be very good at research. Is likely to collect unusual friends who form an admiring circle.

The Sun in Aquarius and in House 2: his will and inner motivations

As he's born under this sign, he's idealistic, altruistic, detached, independent, original, surprising, gifted, contradictory, innovative, humanistic, likeable, friendly, self-confident, impassive, quiet, intuitive, creative, charitable, elusive, disconcerting, generous, tolerant, paradoxical, and you cannot stand any kind of constraint.

In Aquarius the Sun gives him a quiet, patient, determined, unobtrusive and faithful nature. There is no affectation or snobbery in his personality for he doesn't like imitation and hypocrisy in any form (however, can be distant and cold). He operate as an equal among equals, but sometimes he feels that others are unreceptive to him or that they are incapable of comprehending his ideas. He can become annoyed when people fail to understand him. He can be determined and stubborn and may even appear eccentric to others.

His interests and pursuits are more intellectual than physical, and he is not likely to be very sports minded. He loves the beauties of nature, but likes to admire them in comfort.He does his best work when pursuing an ideal in which his excellent memory, creativity, knowledge, love of freedom and humanitarianism can find their outlet. Can appears to be a tireless worker, but his calm appearance can be deceptive. Takes work very seriously, so nervous tensions and apprehensions may seldom leave him. He's most comfortable when working within an organization or in group activities. His interest and sympathy for human problems win the respect and confidence of those around him.He will insist upon living his own life as he sees fit, even if that means ignoring convention and tradition. In personal relationships he cannot be owned or possessed, and while he is willing to share himself with another, he does not always adjust easily to the emotional give and take of a close relationship. He get honest enjoyment from meeting new people and exchanging ideas. He may be anything or nothing, but he is never lonely--his group instinct will always direct him to where the people are, or else they will come to him.He's fair, intelligent, objective and rational, and he often let his head rule rather than his heart. He may appear self-sufficient and emotionally detached because he is capable of putting aside his personal feelings and viewing things dispassionately. He's forward-looking and progressive and he harbor great hopes for the future.Some strong points in his personality include his concern for human welfare and social betterment, his sense of fairness and democratic spirit, AND his universal vision. On the human level, he needs to work on flexibility and sensitivity to the feelings of others, and learn to accept their human imperfections and their differences.He's loyal, faithful and surprising. Once he finds his soulmate, he feels more comfortable and, if the harmony with your partner is rich enough, he may stay with him his whole life through. Certainly has moments that seem strange to his partner, for instance when he is impersonal or even cold. But his natural magnetism, his communication skills and his shrewdness as plays with words, work wonders for patching things up.He avoids problems that may cause emotional or sentimental complications. Because he is often disconcerting, his partner may need some time to adjust: he disappears suddenly when he does not want to deal too closely with his individuality. And he reappears as quickly with excuses and a charming casualness, and again, he is disconcerting!He's interested in things that are out of the ordinary. His erotic imagination may be immense and inexhaustible. He belongs to the cerebral type and he cannot separate physical and sentimental aspects from his imagination’s intense activity. As a result, he explores with lucidity all the possibilities that may suit him best.

Sun square or opposition Pluto Orb 0° 10'

He has a strong desire for power and personal recognition: he wants to BE somebody. He is charismatic, and people often find themselves drawn to his strength. However, he can often be too forceful and somewhat domineering, and may want to make other people over to fit his mold.

Emotions: Feelings and Disposition to Romance

The Moon in Aquarius and in House 2: his sensitivity.

He’s not easily moved by emotional spectacles and curiously can be detached from his own and others' emotions. His sensitivity is devoid of infatuation or carelessness, Phil Lester, belongs to the cerebral type and, due to his needs for inner security and for freedom, he considers feelings and emotions as burdens. He's apparently phlegmatic and almost detached. It's almost as if he could turn off or turn on his feelings at will and must take care not to leave them off too often, being that easily becomes impersonal. However, his swift reactivity and his fertile imagination make him appreciate friendly gatherings with numerous and varied exchanges. He does not wear his heart on his sleeve. At first, he seems cold but those who know he's aware of his very original and unique sense of humour. His receptiveness is remarkable. His observation talents and his detachment work wonders in the defence of his anti-conformist and rebellious ideas. Feels comfortable in an atmosphere that is open and experimental, and has very little taste for the conventional and traditional.Material affairs can have an importance disconnected from reality, he tends to be very emotional about practical matters related to his personal interests. It can also attach quite strongly to money and possessions, due to the belongings give him a sense of security and continuity with the past, which is important to him. Antiques or things with sentimental value from his past are especially appreciated. Maybe unconsciously fears some kind of shortage.

Moon in harmonic aspect to Venus orb 4 ° 49 '

Feels that small acts of caring and consideration are essential to the happiness and success of a relationship and knows how to make others feel accepted, loved and cherished.

Venus in Sagittarius and in House 1, and the Sun in Aquarius: his affectivity and seductiveness.

This planetary configuration includes two types of affectivity, complementary in many regards. The Sun in Aquarius and Venus in Sagittarius share a marked inclination for discoveries, new things and borderless loves… The Sun in Aquarius is perpetually searching, as he believes that love will be more intense tomorrow, that each new day brings its share of affective growth.

Venus in Sagittarius is future-oriented and lives on external stimulations. He believes that the world remains to be explored because it is full of temptations that arouse his desires. He cannot be satisfied with a love that does not offer the new thrills he needs in order not to get bored. The balance of this fragile but exciting configuration lies in its exceptional ability to reinvent the relationship, to give his heart impulses a new momentum and to overcome his affective life's vicissitudes. This planetary duet's challenge is that he must not let his heart get bogged down in the quicksands of a lasting life together. Keeps on renewing his seductive power, over and over again, and one never gets bored in his company. He's socially outgoing, with a pleasing manner and friendly appearance. -Is likely to have a striking physical beauty as well.- He should generally has a happy outlook on life, and his natural ability to mix well with other people should contribute to both good business and exciting romantic opportunities.In love, due to him venus in sagittarius, he seeks companionship and friendship with whoever is fun, playful and loves adventure and new experiences. Enjoy traveling accompanied, meeting new people, and making new friends. Going on a honeymoon to a distant country attracts him, as he is attracted by foreigners or someone with an experience and provenance totally different from his own. He supports his partner if he takes risks and makes positive changes rather than supporting the status quo. His greatest desire is a couple that wants to promote it in their dreams and aspirations. It is very important to have spiritual or intellectual affinity with his partner, perhaps more important than the emotional or physical relationship (the lasts is just a bonus). Within his relationship, needs to feel freedom and independence, which he needs since his childhood. Under such conditions, harmony and faithfulness can be achieved.

On the affective plane, is open, straightforward, spontaneous and he make friends easily because his enthusiasm is expressed jovially, directly and is respectful of well-established moral values. His feelings are burning and he often get carried away quickly. Ideally, for him, be with someone must have some degree of mobility and include travels and fresh air.

Phil's Houses

#dnp by the stars #phil lester #astrology #ascendant in sagittarius #moon in aquarius #sun in aquarius #dan and phil #amagazingphil #phan #aquarius

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davidmann95 · 8 years ago

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What's your Marvel Starter Pack?

My Marvel knowledge isn’t nearly as extensive as what I have for DC, so this’ll be scaled back to 12 books from the 15 I had there (nevermind Superman and Batman’s own personal lists). Additionally, since Marvel’s even more about Right Now than DC, nothing here is earlier than the turn of the century; a lot of my older recommended reading is by my dad’s suggestion since he had plenty of firsthand experience with the Silver and Bronze ages. Also worth noting that my Marvel tastes don’t exactly fall in line with the general sensibilities of Tumblr or fandom at large - I’m not a big X-Men guy, for instance - so your results may vary. But anyway, again, if you’re following me but new to actually collecting comics and wondering what to look into to gauge your interests, I’ve got plenty for you.

1. Daredevil by Mark Waid

What it’s about: Blinded as a child pushing an old man out of the path of an oncoming truck transporting radioactive waste, Matt Murdock grew up to become a lawyer, encouraged by his pugilist father Battlin’ Jack Murdock not to rely on his fists as he had throughout life. But when Jack was murdered for refusing to throw a fight, Matt was forced to rely on the talents he had developed in secret under his sensei Stick - the same isotopes that took away his sight boosted his remaining four to superhuman levels, as well as granting him a 360° awareness of his surroundings he termed his ‘radar sense’ - to find justice for his father and those like him, becoming the vigilante Daredevil. Now, after a crimefighting career marked by agony, loss, and an increasingly deteriorating psyche, his identity has been unofficially exposed by the tabloid press…but attempting to turn around both his life and his mental health, Matt’s chosen to try and re-embrace the good in both his daytime career and in the thrill of his adventures as the Man Without Fear.

Why you should read it: Aside from being in my opinion the most influential superhero comic of the decade, Mark Waid’s tenure on Daredevil is the complete package of superhero comics. Energizing, gorgeous, accessible, character-driven, innovative, and bold, it’s a platonic ideal of Good Superhero Comics, and most especially Good Marvel Superhero Comics, and as such there’s little better place to start.

Further recommendations if you liked it: Shockingly, few modern Marvel titles seem to operate on a similar frequency to this run, even among those that clearly wouldn’t have existed without it; of those I don’t mention in one capacity or another below, the only modern books that leap out to me as being of a similar breed are Roger Langridge and Chris Samnee’s (the latter ending up the primary artist on Waid’s Daredevil) tragically cut short Thor: The Mighty Avenger, Dan Slott and Mike Allred’s Silver Surfer, and Al Ewing’s Contest of Champions. Given the classic mood it evokes, you might also be interested in some of Marvel’s older stuff in general - as probably most conveniently packaged in the Essential volumes - as well as the more recent Marvel Adventures line of all-ages titles. For hornhead himself, most of his classic work tends to operate in a pitch-black noir mood that much of Waid’s run is meant to contrast; if you want to delve into it, go to Frank Miller’s run (primarily Born Again), then Brian Bendis’s followed by Ed Brubaker’s and, following Waid, Chip Zdarsky’s (the Charles Soule run in the middle seems largely forgettable).

2. Marvels

What: Following the career of photojournalist Phil Sheldon - beginning in World War II with the rise of the likes of the Human Torch, Namor, and Captain America, and forward into the reemergence of superheroes with the Fantastic Four - Marvels shows what the battles that define a world look like to the helpless spectators, from the controversy surrounding mysterious vigilantes such as Spider-Man, the fear of the “mutant menace” represented by the X-Men, and the terror when the planet is first truly threatened at the hands of Galactus.

Why: As well as being one of Marvel’s best and most defining works period - this is Kurt Busiek and Alex Ross’s coming out party as two of the most significant names in the genre, and it articulates Marvel’s avowed “it’s the world outside your window!” philosophy better than perhaps any other title - Marvel is ruled by history and continuity in a way DC isn’t. The latter may have reboots to contend with, but Marvel has a much more upfront and consistently significant timeline of what happened when and what’s important, and if you’re going to have to immerse yourself in that ridiculous lore, there’s no more fulfilling way of getting an injection of pure backstory than this.

Recommendations: There’s a follow-up by Busiek, Roger Stern and Jay Anacleto titled Marvels: Eye of the Camera; I haven’t read it yet myself, but given the pedigree involved I can’t imagine it’s anything less than entirely solid. For other Major Marvel Events, the defining one of the 21st century is Mark Millar and Steve McNiven’s Civil War, which set a tone that still reverberates through the line; also worth checking out the recent Marvel Legacy oneshot, which seems to be laying the groundwork for things to come. Speaking of setting a tone, while it’s not directly ‘relevant’ continuity-wise, Millar also worked with Bryan Hitch on Ultimates 1 & 2, which proved to be the aesthetic model for the current wave of Marvel movies and added plenty of ideas that have been extensively mined since. History of the Marvel Universe by Mark Waid and Javier Rodriguez fits its title and is absolutely worth a library checkout, but is mainly a rote checklist elevated by all-timer artwork.

3. Kieron Gillen and Jamie McKelvie’s Young Avengers

What: The heroes of the group once known as the ‘Young Avengers’ have gone their separate ways, each trying to figure things out on the cusp of adulthood. But when Wiccan’s attempt at helping his boyfriend goes horribly wrong - mixed in with a pint-sized god of mischief’s machinations, an interdimensional bruiser’s attempts at routing him, and non-Hawkguy Hawkeye’s extraterrestrial hookup - the gang’s forced back together again and on the run before old age literally swallows them whole.

Why: Here’s the bummer truth, daddy-o: I am not, in the common parlance, down with the hep cats, at least as far as gateway young-readers Marvel books go. I flipped through Runaways and wasn’t compelled to pick it up; I kept on with Ms. Marvel for a couple years but always on the edge of falling out of my monthly pile. Unless it’s truly next-level spectacular or heart-pouring-out sincere, gimme superfolks routing fiendish plots and going on trippy adventures any day over a bunch of sad kids in tights figuring out adolescence all over again: Spidey already did it first and better, and when emotionally-down-to-Earth superhero comics do get me fired up it’s usually set a little later on in life (even when I was the target audience for this sort of thing). But fire it through Gillen/McKelvie laser neon sexytime pop, and suddenly you’re in business. Slick, smart, raw, and wild, this was the best comic of 2013, and’ll certainly go down as one of the best superhero titles of this decade, Marvel as the Cool Kids of superherodom dialed up to 11.

Recommendations: Nothing else quite like this out there - the closest in feeling is Grant Morrison and J.G. Jones’ excellent original Marvel Boy miniseries, though that’s more about becoming a 20-something out in the world in the sense of wanting to burn it all down to the ground - but as I said, Runaways and Ms. Marvel do generally appeal to the same audience (and to be clear, I did like the latter just fine), as do the original Young Avengers run and Avengers Academy. Personally, I checked out and liked Avengers Arena, where all the fun teen heroes got forced into Hunger Gamsing each other on a murder island run by Arcade, followed up by them breaking bad in Avengers Undercover - please note that I’m like one of the three people on Earth who liked this book as opposed to ravenously despising it, which probably has in part do to with my lack of prior attachment to the characters involved. Also, important to note that this book is in the middle of a thematic Loki trilogy, preceded by Gillen’s Journey Into Mystery (which I haven’t read but don’t for a second doubt the quality of), and completed by Al Ewing and Lee Garbett’s truly magnificent Loki: Agent of Asgard; also worth noting that these books, and really modern Loki as a whole, are deeply rooted in Robert Rodi and Esad Ribic’s Thor & Loki: Blood Brothers. And for perfect entry books, I don’t think there’s much of anything better out there, especially for young readers, than Ryan North and Erica Henderson’s The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl, one of Marvel’s most consistently high-quality ongoings of the last several years.

4. Hawkeye: My Life As A Weapon

What: Clint Barton, aka Hawkeye, aka Hawkguy, is the Avenger who’s Just A Dude. No super-steroids and vita-rays, no magic hammer or Pym particles, a distinct lack of multi-billion dollar armor or immortality serum. Dude has a bow and arrow, and while he is very, very good with that bow and arrow, he still gets his ass kicked a frankly disproportionate amount relative to his teammates. Between meeting a dog, buying a car, and hanging out with friends - even if each incident goes significantly more wrong that they would for anyone other than Clint Barton, with non-Hawkguy Hawkeye Kate Bishop typically along for the ride - this is what he gets up to when he’s not helping save the world.

Why: Gonna show my heresy again: I’m not actually over the moon about Fraction/Aja’s Hawkeye past the first arc. But that first arc? Man oh man oh man, are they about as good as Marvel gets. This is absolute next-level storytelling on every front, with Aja and Pulido pulling out all the stops and Fraction - who by all accounts thinks more about the process of how comics work than anyone else in the field - just pouring heart and style all over the thing. It’s as tight and energetic as comics get, and the perfect introduction to Marvel’s street-level corner.

Recommendations: Aside from the rest of this run, there’s the recent Hawkeye (starring the non-Hawkguy Hawkeye Kate Bishop) by Kelly Thompson and Leonardo Romero, and there’s a generous helping of Hawkguy in Ales Kot and Michael Walsh’s Secret Avengers, a book as tight and out-of-the-box and oddly joyous in its own way as this. If you’re looking for other Marvel material that gets this explicitly experimental and afield of the house style, go for Jim Steranko’s much-loved work with Nick Fury. And for the other, considerably grimmer side of the street, aside from the Daredevil stuff I mentioned above, check out anything and everything you can get your hands on from Garth Ennis’s work with the Punisher, along with Greg Rucka’s and Jason Aaron’s.

5. Moon Knight: From The Dead

EDIT: This list was written prior to allegations made against Warren Ellis. It’s your money, but while I’d still recommend checking the book out of the library - the quality of the work isn’t going to change now that it’s out there in the universe - if you’re looking to pad your bookshelf I might recommend skipping to some of the books suggested below in its place.

What: Marc Spector was a mercenary until the day he died, betrayed in the desert before an Egyptian temple by his comrades…and then he kept going. No one knows for sure whether the truth is what his doctors have to say - that sharing his head with the likes of Steven Grant and Jake Lockley is a manifestation of DID, and he’s a profoundly sick man - or his own interpretation - that his fragile human personality buckled and shattered before the immensity when dying by its temple, he bowed his head at death’s door to the moon god Khonshu and let it seize his soul. Whatever the truth, he now knows his purpose: to defend travelers by night from whatever horrors would cross their path.

Why: There’s no story as such to be told here; Ellis and Shalvey simply show six adventures over six issues that establish Moon Knight and the scope of what he’s capable of when handled properly, ranging from straightforward detective work to psychedelic journeys through a rotting dream to a jaw-dropping issue-long fight scene. Marvel has a proud history of material skewing slightly to the left of the rest of their output, tonally and conceptually, and this is your ideal gateway to Weird Marvel.

Recommendations: For the further adventures of Moon Knight, by recommendation would be Max Bemis and Jacen Burrows’ current volume, which is following up on the seeds Ellis and Shalvey laid down quite satisfactorily, with a few twists of their own on top. Ellis himself used Moon Knight before this in his run on Secret Avengers with a number of different artists, which was very much a precursor to his work above in its high-concept done-in-one style; also check out his book Nextwave with Stuart Immonen, which is as out there as it gets for Marvel and also the best comic ever. Delving into Marvel’s spooky side, if this did anything at all for you absolutely get all of Al Ewing and Joe Bennett’s massively and rightfully acclaimed The Immortal Hulk (and if you’re looking for more something more traditional with the Green Goliath, Mark Waid’s The Indestructible Hulk is a hoot). If you really want to go to ground zero of Weird Marvel, you’re in the market for Steve Gerber’s work, primarily Defenders and his own creation Howard the Duck (who had another very entertaining via Chip Zdarsky and Joe Quinones recently worth checking out). Another notably out-there character worth checking out is She-Hulk, particularly in Dan Slott’s run and Charles Soule/Javier Pulido’s. Two more figures existing on Marvel’s weirder end are Doctor Strange - whose ‘classic’ work would as I understand it be Steve Englehart and Frank Brunner’s run, and who’s worth checking out more recently in Brian K. Vaughan and Marcos Martin’s miniseries The Oath, Jason Aaron and Chris Bachalo’s run, and Donny Cates and Gabriel Hernandez Walta’s - and the Inhumans - while contemporary attempts to push them have been a failure, there have been excellent individual successes in Ellis, Gerardo Zaffino, and Roland Boschi’s Karnak, Al Ewing and company’s Royals, and Saladin Ahmed and Christian Ward’s Black Bolt. And I’d be remiss in the extreme not to bring up Gabriel Walta and Tom King’s Vision, which I don’t want to give anything away of, but has a serious claim to being the best thing Marvel’s ever published.

6. Ultimate Spider-Man by Bendis & Bagley

What: When bitten by a genetically mutated spider Peter Parker thought he could use his newfound powers to make a quick buck, and come on, you already know this.

Why: This is the foundational modern Spider-Man. The first arc’s aged a little wonky in bits as Bendis was trying to make late-90s/early-00s Teen Slang work, but by and large, Brian Bendis and Mark Bagley’s original 111-issue tenure on Ultimate Spider-Man reimagining his early years was pound-for-pound one of Marvel’s all-time most engaging, exciting, dramatic, and authentic long-term runs. This is the template for every movie (especially Homecoming) and TV show he’s had in the last decade, a sizable part of what got me into comics in the first place, and one of the company’s most reliable perennials. You want to get onboard with maybe the most popular superhero in the world, you do it here.

Recommendations: With the remainder of the list I’m getting into more character/concept-specific reccs, and for other great Spider-Man, your best bet truly is the classic early material by Stan Lee, Steve Ditko, and John Romita as collected in the Essential volumes, which has aged unbelievably well compared to its contemporaries; Bendis’s post-Bagley material just doesn’t hold up, even with the introduction of fan-favorite Miles Morales. For other ‘classics’, your best bests are Spider-Man: Blue, and by my understanding the runs of Roger Stern and J.M. DeMatteis, particularly the latters’ Kraven’s Last Hunt. For the modern stuff, Chip Zdarksy’s current Peter Parker: The Spectacular Spider-Man is just getting better and better, I’ve heard very good things about Spider-Man Loves Mary Jane, I personally enjoyed Mark Millar and (at his peak) JMS’s runs, and while most agree Dan Slott’s soon-concluding decade-long tenure on the character has outstayed its welcome, he’s also turned in some stone-cold classics like No One Dies and Spider-Man/Human Torch, as well as other entertaining work such as the original Renew Your Vows and Superior Spider-Man. Most recently, Chip Zdarsky’s work with the character in The Spectacular Spider-Man and the high-concept out-of-continuity miniseries Spider-Man: Life Story are some of Mr. Parker’s all-time best, while Tom Taylor’s Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man is a charming relatively small-scale superhero adventure book, and Saladin Ahmed and Javier Garron’s Miles Morales: Spider-Man is easily the best possible introduction to that guy.

7. Thor: God of Thunder Vol. 1

What: Though Thor, the god of thunder and mighty Avenger, has faced limitless threats to even divine life and limb over his many millennia, only one figure has ever truly frightened him. Now, as he discovers a serial killer of deities is loose in the cosmos, he must turn to his past and future alike in order to survive the coming of the God-Butcher.

Why: The pick on this list most directly relevant to those coming in from the movies right now, I’m afraid that while a bit of this was plucked for Ragnarok, this isn’t remotely on the same wavelength. This is black metal death opera screamed through the megaphone of wild space-spanning superheroics, and not only is it the best Thor comic, it’s the perfect introduction to Marvel’s cosmic side.

Recommendations: Along with the Loki books I namechecked above, the defining run on Thor (though the rest of his continuing work there is also very much worth checking out) is Walter Simonson, which laid down a lot of the fundamentals of the character as he exists today; along with that and the rest of Aaron’s run, my understanding is that Lee/Kirby’s original run holds up very well. For more satisfying fight comics, I’d also suggest World War Hulk, and I hear Marvel’s early Conan comics were standouts. On the cosmic end, I know the Guardians of the Galaxy are where it’s at these days; they sprang to life in their current incarnation in the much-loved Annihilation, and while I haven’t been reading their current Gerry Duggan/Aaron Kuder run, it’s well-liked and probably a good place to drop on, as would be the recent Chip Zdarsky/Kris Anka Starlord, and I’d personally recommend Al Ewing and Adam Gorhan’s Rocket. Beyond them, Jonathan Hickman’s comics are where it’s really at, from his Fantastic Four to S.H.I.E.L.D. to Ultimates to Avengers/New Avengers to the big finale to his overarching story in Secret Wars; it’s a complicated reading order to figure out, but oh-so-worth it.

8. Iron Man: Extremis

What: Faced with the horrors of his amoral past and the questions of a future coming quicker than he can manage, Tony Stark faces his most dangerous enemy yet when experimental post-human body modification tech is let loose into the world and lands in the hands of a white supremacist terrorist cell.

Why: More than anything other than Robert Downey Jr. smirking and quipping, this story is the definitive model for the modern Iron Man, taking a C-lister most notable for dealing with alcoholism decades earlier and hanging out on the B-list team in the Avengers (at least until 2012), and redefining his personality, aesthetic, and role in the 21st century as a man who might be smart enough to save the world if he can ever pull together enough to somehow save himself from his own compromises and weaknesses. The road to this guy becoming a household name is paved here.

Recommendations: Prior to this, his biggest stories were Demon in a Bottle, showing his first reckoning with his alcohol abuse, and Denny O’Neil’s 40-issue run introducing Obadiah Stane and showing Stark’s darkest hour as he sinks completely into his illness. Post-Ellis, the big run is Matt Fraction and Salvador Larroca, which seizes both on the ideas here and the momentum granted by his Hollywood debut to cement his status as an A-lister; after that check out Kieron Gillen’s, which is not only a fun big-idea series in its own right but paves the way for Al Ewing’s spinoff Fatal Frontier, easily one of Iron Man’s best and most overlooked titles. Finally, while it was derided in its own time (that it was a spinoff of an event that turned him evil but the comic never especially explained the circumstances didn’t help), Superior Iron Man is also worth a look as a horrifying contrast to the rest of these.

9. Captain America: Man Out Of Time

What: A sickly young man who volunteered to participate in an experimental super-soldier program to serve his country in World War II, Steve Rogers became Captain America and protected the world from the Nazis with unimaginable courage and distinction, until the day he died disarming a drone plane rigged to blow aimed at America’s shores. He was honored throughout history…until the day he was found alive by the Avengers, frozen in the Atlantic and ready to emerge into the lights of the 21st century when needed most. Most people know that story. This is the story of what happened next.

Why: The search for the definitive statement on Captain America is one that’s driven his character for decades: after all, handling him doesn’t just mean talking about one man’s character, but the character of a nation. Successes are typically qualified, but one of the more successful creators in the pool is Mark Waid, who’s up to his fourth time at bat with Steve right now on the main book. His own most notable effort however is here, showing Rogers’ earliest days post-iceberg as he adjusts to living in what is to him the far-flung future, seeing the ways the nation has both surpassed his wildest dreams and fallen short of his humblest expectations, leaving him in the end to make the choice of whether this is truly the world he wants to defend.

Recommendations: As I mentioned, Waid’s had a few times up at bat with Captain America, and while he initial 90s stints might not be ideal for new readers for a number of reasons, his current run with frequent partner Chris Samnee is a solid crowdpleaser and a perfect place to jump onboard. Prior to that, worth checking out are Jim Steranko’s bizarre and transformative 3-issue run, Steve Englehart’s legendary Secret Empire (not the recent contentious Marvel event comic, to be clear), Ed Brubaker’s turn of the character towards grounded espionage, and his co-creator Jack Kirby’s bombastic, passionate 1970s tenure on the Captain. Currently, Ta-Nehisi Coates’ run is quite solid. Regarding related characters, for the Winter Soldier I’d suggest Ales Kot and Marco Rudy’s unconventional cosmic thriller Bucky Barnes: Winter Soldier; Black Widow had her own recent and excellent Mark Waid/Chris Samnee run, and I’d also recommend the one-shot Avengers Assemble 14AU by Al Ewing and Butch Guice, and issue #20 from Warren Ellis’s previously mentioned time on Secret Avengers; for Black Panther, his definitive runs are under Don McGregor and Christopher Priest, and I’d also note Jason Aaron and Jefte Palo’s Secret Invasion arc as showing T’Challa at his best.

10. Fantastic Four By Waid & Wieringo

What: Bathed in cosmic radiation on an ill-fated journey to the stars, Reed Richards, Sue and Johnny Storm, and Ben Grimm were transformed, and became the Fantastic Four, first family of an age of heroes! Now, years into their careers and with Reed and Sue’s young children in tow, they continue to explore new frontiers, whether battling a sentient equation gone mad, contending with an extradimensional roach infestation, or perhaps most perilous of all, Johnny trying to deal with getting a real job.

Why: Plenty consider the Fantastic Four one of Marvel’s most difficult groups to get right, but Waid and Wieringo nail the formula here as well as anyone ever has, just the right mix of high adventure and family dynamics to draw just about anyone in; this is as crowdpleasing as comics get and the perfect introduction to the best superhero team out there.

Recommendations: The FF’s another group where it’s worth going back to their earliest days of Lee and Kirby; while much of the writing’s aged awkwardly at best, they’re the absolute foundational comics of the entire universe and lay down concepts that are still getting use today throughout that universe. Past that initial run, John Byrne and Walter Simonson’s are among the best by reputation, as well as Jonathan Hickman’s as I discussed before (Mark Millar and Bryan Hitch’s is worth tracking down as well, especially since concepts there end up feeding directly into Hickman). For more outside-the-box material, Joe Casey and Chris Weston’s First Family is worth a look, as is Grant Morrison and Jae Lee’s 1234. And for the all-time best showing of bashful Benjamin J. Grimm, the ever-lovin’ blue-eyed Thing, find Marvel Two-In-One Annual #7 to see him defend the entire planet in a boxing match at Madison Square Garden. And while the team’s sadly off the table at the moment, Thing and the Torch are returning in Chip Zdarsky and Jim Cheung’s new volume of Marvel Two-In-One as they set out to find their missing family.

11. Mighty Avengers by Al Ewing

What: When Thanos takes to the skies as Earth’s Mightiest Heroes are off-planet, it’s a day unlike any other, as those left standing are forced to band together as the Mighty Avengers. And as the danger passes, the team remains, looking to truly work alongside those they protect rather than above them to make things better, even as forces conspire in the background to enslave them all.

Why: This title is something of a limitus test, in that it’s one where you’ll have to deal with it being constantly, infuriatingly forced to deal with crossover nonsense. It’s one of the big prices to pay for engaging with a larger universe, but the trade-off is that this is where Al Ewing gets set loose on the Marvel universe, drawing on every weird corner to pull together a run of genuine moral intent, note-perfect character work, and all-out adventure. This may be the ‘secondary’ team, but it’s as perfect as the Avengers have ever gotten.

Recommendations: The title itself is relaunched as Captain America and the Mighty Avengers, and as that ends but Ewing continues his time at Marvel, the characters and concepts end up divided among a number of titles: Contest of Champions, where a number of heroes are plucked from the timestream to duel for the power and amusement of the Grandmaster, New Avengers (later turned U.S.Avengers), where former X-Man Sunspot assembles a new team to act as a James Bond-ified international strike force, and Ultimates (later turned Ultimates2), where some of Earth’s most powerful and brilliant heroes band together to proactively defend against unimaginable cosmic threats; also try his mini-event Ultron Forever with Alan Davis sometime. Based on your response to numerous aspects of those titles, there’s a good chance you might be in the market for David Walker’s Luke Cage titles, Matt Fraction’s Defenders, and Jim Starlin’s cosmic 70s books such as Captain Marvel and Warlock (and make sure to read Nextwave at some point, Ewing actually follows up on that gonzo delight in some surprising ways here). For the ‘main’ team, aside from Hickman’s previously mentioned run - which while spectacular is pretty far afield of the usual tone - some suggestions might be Kurt Busiek and George Perez’s much-loved run, Roger Stern’s Under Siege, I have to imagine given the pedigree of the creators Earth’s Mightiest Heroes by Joe Casey and Scott Kolins, Brian Bendis’s extended ownership of the Avengers books, and The Kree-Skrull War.

12. Wolverine & The X-Men by Jason Aaron

What: Dwindled down to a few in a world that hates and fears them as much as ever, mutantkind has been split in two, with by-the-books Cyclops taking a hardline approach against oppression and feeling that the youth in the X-Men’s charge must be made ready to fight, while Wolverine has grown tired of throwing children into battle and has left to find a new way. Founding the Jean Gray School For Higher Learning, Logan’s found himself in the most unexpected role of all as a professor, fighting just has hard to keep the unimaginable high-tech academy and the hormonal super-powered student body in check as to fend off the supervillains inevitably sent their way.

Why: The X-Men aren’t exactly my forte, with a wobbly batting average at best over the years as the books devote at least as much effort to trying to juggle the continuity and soap opera demands as the actual sci-fi premise. There have been successes though, and few so geared towards new reader engagement as Wolverine & The X-Men, where Aaron strips the franchise down to the base essentials of a team living in a school for super-kids. It’s poppy, it’s weird, it’s touching, and it’s accessible. It’s the X-Men at its best.

Recommendations: The most direct predecessor to this run (aside from its actual lead-in miniseries X-Men: Schism, which is actually worth checking out) is Grant Morrison’s New X-Men, which takes the sci-fi aspects of the concept to the very limit in what I’m inclined to consider the best X-Men run, though it’s proven controversial over the years among longtime fans. The base of the team as it exists today is in Chris Clarmemont’s work, which I’m not wild about myself but has a few hits such as God Loves, Man Kills; if you’re looking for a modern update on the formula developed there, Astonishing X-Men by Joss Whedon and John Cassaday is probably your ticket (and the follow-up run by Warren Ellis is a great weird paramilitary sci-fi book for a bit). Jonathan Hickman’s relaunch is a radicaly and brilliant departure paving a new way forward; it’s perhaps best experienced after a bit of ‘traditional’ X-Men to understand the scale of the contrast, but check that out as soon as possible. For classic material, I understand the Roy Thomas/Neal Adams run was an early success, and Jeff Parker’s X-Men: First Class is by all accounts a charming look at the team’s earliest days. Jason Aaron’s work elsewhere on the X-Men proper was limited to the first 6 issues of the short-lived Amazing X-Men, but he had a very extended and successful tenure on Wolverine which would be my go-to recommendation for him; past that, Death of Wolverine actually satisfies, and All-New Wolverine starring his successor Laura Kinney was the best X-Men book on the stands for some time (writer Tom Taylor is also had a short-lived ‘proper’ X-book in X-Men: Red). As for the group’s many spin-offs, I’d suggest Rick Remender’s X-Force, Peter Milligan and Mike Allred’s X-Factor/X-Statix, and Joe Kelly and Ed McGuiness’s Spider-Man/Deadpool, which should serve as a decent introduction to the latter dude’s own oddball territory in the franchise along with the truly mad and utterly delightful You Are Deadpool.

#Marvel #Opinion

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caustic-crow · 8 years ago

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Markiplier Appreciation

I don't think I've ever properly made one of these, except for Ethan, so bear with me. There's going to be some rambling, some of my crying while typing, some laughing. But I just really felt the need to make an appreciation post for @markiplier for everything he's done.

I want to start off with the first ever Markiplier video I watched. Now. I don’t really remember; I started watching him in the eighth grade, and a lot of memories of this year has been blocked out. Suffice to say, had the video not affected me, I would not be writing this post. Eighth grade for me was 2014-2015, and if I’m being honest I don’t remember what Mark was doing then. (Now that I think about it, I’m like 95% sure the first videos of his I ever watched was his Amnesia: A Machine For Pigs series. I think. Maybe?) Anyway, whatever video it was, it started it all.

I’m not going to lie, my interest in Mark has waxed and waned over the years, giving way for a large period of Dan & Phil (which is still happening) or Jacksepticeye (equally important as Mark and D&P) or even obsessions with various bands or fictional characters that have saved my life. But it’s always been there, and I’ve always come back to his videos. Mark has always been a sort of rock for me, whether it be through his silly one shots, serious videos, longer, more in depth series (such as Until Dawn or Prey, for example), or things like A Date With Markiplier and now Who Killed Markiplier?. Mark has always been there.

It’s almost weird to type, to try and put into words how much someone you’ve never even spoken to can mean so damn much to you, but I feel like I need to. Mark is my fucking hero, so fuckle the buckle up because if you thought I was done, oh boy.

This is about to be an adventure for you guys, as only one other person, the person who was experiencing the situation with me at the time, knows what the fizzity fuck happened to make me understand just how much Mark meant to me. This is going to be weird, and I’m actually weirded out explaining it, but here we go. A few months ago, around February or March (maybe April?) I was a part of this group of friends, it was me and four others who I won’t name for privacy reasons, as I’m about 99% sure one of them now has me blocked. Three of these four people, for whatever reason, hated Mark. Whenever I (or my friend) brought him up, they would instantly come down upon him with a reign of reasons why he was terrible. I, at the time, was already afraid of being outcasted again due to another incident I now refer to as the “anime-bullshit bullshit”, simply tried to ignore the comments made and mainly dismissed them in an attempt to keep an already walking-on-eggshells friendship stable. But it felt weird. Wrong. I had watched Mark for so long, respected him for so long, that simply shrugging off these comments and not defending my reason for loving Mark as much as I do felt like a betrayal. In a way, to me, it was. It sort of put into perspective just how much Mark meant to me. You may be asking why this is relevant. I’m getting there, don’t worry.

Because of this situation, I looked back on my time as a subscriber to Markiplier, looked back to ask myself how these people could possibly hate Markiplier? To me, Mark has and always will be someone who can make me smile when I feel like absolute garbage, On more than one occasion, he’s uploaded a video with a specific message exactly when I needed it (even though this is sheer coincidence to some, this type of coincidence means a lot to me), and he’s the reason I have such a strong appreciation of dedication. Mark is the man who makes me want to grow as a person, and he and his team have created such a sheer overwhelming amount of appreciation for hard work, acting, camerawork, and editing for me that I just can’t fathom why someone wouldn’t appreciate him. He’s my role model, and I’ll be quite honest, he’s saved my life on more than one occasion. The whole thing caused such a revelation to me that it still shakes me sometimes.

Recently, Mark went on hiatus, and on Friday the 13th, released the first episode of Who Killed Markiplier. All of the episodes (including the comedic relief in between, God bless you Team Iplier) carried such excellent cinematography. The effects, the backstory (well, this may not exactly apply to the comic relief, but you feel me), the storyline itself, the acting, the characters, the stunts... it’s all so fantastic and so well put together that when I was watching it I got so invested that I felt like I was in the story myself. Which is likely how Mark intended it to be. I’m rambling a bit, I know, but I just dgnjurdfhgiI I love it so much leave me alone. Anyway. what I was trying to say is, Mark puts so much effort into his content, into doing what he loves, into everything (including fan interaction someone please let me hug him I need a markiplier hug okay) and I genuinely can’t fathom a world without him.

Long story short, if it wasn’t for Markiplier I’m not sure where I’d be tbh, and he deserves love and appreciation and I’m going to go cry about how much I love him and over the ending to WKM goodnight

#markiplier #markiplier appreciation #my story #sort of a vent more of an explaination of my love for markiplier #long ass post #seriously tho I fucking love mark

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paigenoelchas-blog · 2 years ago

Text

Feels Like Home

33: Friendship

Mahri's POV:

Phil and Dan stand in the garage admiring the bike I had picked out for Jake's Christmas present. Jake told me that the best gift that he had received was a bike from his mom on his tenth birthday. I wanted to remind him of that gift and let him know that there could still be a world filled with amazing Christmases and unbelievable happiness.

"He is not going to know how to handle this beautiful machine." Dan starts, "Are you sure I can't take this off your hands for you?"

"He is an excellent driver," I say defending Jake.

"And this, "Phil adds, "Is an excellent bike. Well done, Em."

"Thanks." I beam. I am proud of this bike, a 1977 Indian Chief. Of course, it has two seats, a priority of mine in case he decides to take me for a ride. He will. I think about the adventures that we are sure to share and smile. The bike had one previous owner and low mileage. She is a beauty, black and retro and classy... very Jake-like.

"He will love it, the lucky jerk," Dan says sincerely and nods his approval, "Did you get a helmet to match the bike? Seriously Mahr, he needs a cool helmet."

Panic sets in. Phil notices. "I can handle that for you. I know a guy. It isn't a problem. Besides, I couldn't think of the perfect gift for my buddy. This seems just right." I am so glad that Jake and Phil are friends now, so grateful that he is dating Betty. I am also more than thankful that Dan and Jake have reconciled.

"Phil, I am impressed that you have your Christmas shopping done. three whole days beforehand." I quip and nudge him in the arm. He winks at me, understanding that I am teasing him. He is actually much more responsible than people give him credit for. He is also much more thoughtful since he met Betty. "Thank you, that would be amazing and if you get him a helmet, that is one more thing I don't have to stress over. I hug Phil and then Dan, "Thank you so much, thank you both so much for all of this. I haven't had friends like this in a while. I don't think Jake ever has, It means a lot to us."

Dan stiffens and clears his throat, trying to hide emotion, "When does he get his bike and how are you getting it to him?"

"I was going to blindfold him and have him see it here."

"I have a better idea," Dan blurts out, "Leave it to me. It will be there on Christmas morning. I will deliver it myself, red ribbon and all."

I nod and hug each of these wonderful friends. Quickly, their attention turns back to the bike. They continue to stand there after I turn to walk away, I am not sure they even notice I am leaving. They just stare at the bike and occasionally grunt things at each other. They don't approach the bike, just stay back with their arms crossed in approval. I shake my head and leave the garage. "Boys and their toys," I whisper over my shoulder. I have no idea what men think when staring at a vehicle, but these two obviously see something I don't.

I just hope that Jake is as delighted with the bike as they are.

---------------------

Jake's POV:

The girls were supposed to be here five minutes ago. I need their help today of all days. I begin to pace. I am not nervous about my decision. I know that Mahri is the one that I want to spend all of life with. I just want to make it perfect. I have to get this right. This is the only proposal that I will make.

While I haven't confirmed that I am planning on proposing to Mahri, Betty knows. She knows everything and never stops reminding me of that. Confidence like that is a gift and someone that can have that without making other people feel small is a wonderful thing. Betty is incredible and I am so glad for our long friendship.

Jessy has an idea that I am going to propose. I know that she will be overjoyed. She is one of the rare sorts of people that truly delights in the happiness of her friends. Mahri's joy will fill her up. I am glad that the two of us are at a place where she can trust me with Mari's heart. We have become good friends. I am lucky to have two such tremendous women in my life. Three of course, if you count Mahri.

It is odd, I think that those two particular men occupy their hearts. But I am odd and Mahri loves me. Dan and Phil have proven themselves to be reliable and I trust them to love these women properly. It is another thing that I am thankful for this morning. Being in love makes me appreciate all of the glories of this life. It makes me appreciate love in all of its forms. Happiness makes me a sap, but I wouldn't go back to living the other way, not for all of the money in the world.

"There he is, " Betty begins. "I am surprised that you haven't called yet. We are five minutes late."

"Six minutes," I correct her. "and my hand was on the phone." Betty's smile is broad and deep, the smile of a friend that knows you inside and out. She leans over conspiratorially into Jessy's ear but whispers loud enough for me to hear, "Look at the man who is about to make the second-best decision of his life. Have you ever seen such a sap?"

I smile, "What was the best decision?" I ask. Remembering that her love language is name calling.

"It was the day you decided that we should be friends. I have carried you a long way, brother." She responds.

"Indeed you have, but I don't think I had much say in the decision. That was all you. You have always been bossy." I say, acknowledging the impact that she has had on my life. She nods in agreement, knowing that I have loved her for all that she has been to me. "Care to help me with one more task?"

She nods again as Jessy runs up to give me a hug which I happily return. Betty slugs me in the arm before doing the same.

"I am confused about a couple of things," Betty asks blankly. "I thought you were going to ask her to move in with you? I also thought you were unsure about her response."

Jessy giggles. I am confused.

"I think I have something better to say, but nothing about the sun rising. Do I need to add that?" Now I am panicking. Am I going to mess this up? Do I need a speech written? I had been planning on speaking from the heart like I usually do with Mahri.

"NO!" Betty stopped me, "You don't need a speech and you will do fine. I am just razzing you. Just stay away from your big words, they make things seem too rehearsed, the words lose their meaning."

Betty side eyes Jessy, "No pressure. Just be honest. She can't resist you. I should know. I helped create the stud that you are now."

She always knows the right thing to say, "Right," I mumble with my head down. I have a lot of practical things to consider. I fidget with my keys.

Betty notices my nerves and breaks the silence, "Shall we go inside or stay out here and freeze our butts off?"

Jessy is more than excited, "Go inside of course. So, Jake, what kind of cut were you thinking of, and what metal?" She grabs my arm and pulls me through the door.

I shrug, "Let's go see what we can find. I have the two best people with me to find the perfect ring for Mahri."

Jessy smiles and continues running through the options. I had no idea that she knows so much about this stuff. "You could do a platinum princess cut diamond, which is classic or a...." her voice trails off as we continue inside. Betty looks at me with a pitiful smile. She knows that in about two seconds, I am going to shut down.

--------------

MC POV:

The second I walk out of the door, I text Jake.

Mahri: Guess who is off on vacation until after Christmas?

Jake: The woman I love?

Mahri: Assuming that is me, yes.

Jake: You know that it is you. It is only you. It will always be you.

Mahri: :)

Mahri: Can we go out tonight, maybe to the Aurora?

Mahri: We have been cooped up a long time. I bought a new dress.

Jake: I have some things that I have to get done at the house.

Jake: Do you want to come over?

Jake: Wait. I have a better idea. Hang on.

Jake: I happened to run into Betty and Jessy in town. They want to know if you would like to join them for a girl's night. You haven't been out with them in a while.

Mahri: You wouldn't mind?

Jake: Of course not. I love the affection that you all have for each other.

Mahri: Then I would love that. Have them text me.

That instant, I receive two texts.

Betty: Ditch that loser boyfriend of yours and hang out with us girls tonight.

Jessy: Please come hang out with us tonight. We miss you.

M: (to both women) I would love to hang out with you both. It has been too long. See you tonight, 6:30?

Jessy: Yay! I can't wait!

Betty: See you then, Sunshine. We have some things to talk about.

Jessy: I will invite the other girls as well if you are alright with that.

Betty: OOOH, new people. I love meeting new people.

I don't know whether to be scared or thrilled by that last statement. Hopefully, Jessy can prepare Betty for the three women that she is about to meet. Hopefully, Betty can tame her tongue a bit, for Hannah's sake.

Then I remember how good Batty is at reading people. She is someone that I trust implicitly. My nerves turn back to excitement.

I am about to put away my phone when I think of one more thing.

Mahri: Jake?

Jake: Yes, Love.

Mahri: I won't see you tonight....

Jake: I know. I hope there aren't many more nights that we have to say that.

Mahri: Me too.

Jake: You could always stop by after and stay the night if you want.

Jake: I would always like that.

Mahri: I may be drunk, you won't like me when I am drunk and you have work in the morning.

Jake: I like you in every possible scenario, but I do have work. Work would never stop me from wanting to spend the night with you.

Mahri: You are the sweetest man.

Jake: No, I am just in love with a wonderful woman. If you don't come tonight, stop by tomorrow morning. I will make you breakfast and my hangover cure.

Mahri: Love you

Jake: ...and I love you. Be safe and CALL ME if you get into trouble.

Jake: Actually, call me BEFORE you get into trouble.

Mahri: ;)

I head home to change and see the girls. I wonder if this is what my life will always be like. Will I always be surrounded by such wonderful, amazing people who love me and who I adore? I can't imagine a better future.

My drive home is quick. I hop in the shower and change into a tight black dress. It has lace cutouts in all of the right places. The back dips to just above my ass. Jake wouldn't let me leave the house in this dress, not because he is controlling, but because we wouldn't make it that far before he ripped the dress off me. The thought makes me blush and miss him. Maybe I will stop by tonight. I add some red, very high heels that would make any boy's head spin. I can't wait to see what Jake thinks of me in them. I am going to have fun with the girls, but who is to say that I can't also have fun with my man.

I am on vacation after all.

------------

Jake's POV:

I wasn't entirely honest with Mahri. I am really busy, but never too busy to be with her. Mahri and I had been ignoring our friends for quite a while. It is easy to do when you are in love the way that we are. Spending time with Betty and Jessy today made me realize how much Mahri must miss them whether she realizes it or not.

Betty and Jessy were so excited by the thought of being together that I wanted Mahri to have that chance as well.

I am nervous and excited. I haven't hosted a party. I haven't spent time with many people. I still haven't become that acquainted with social norms. To say I am slightly nervous is an understatement, but I appreciate these men that have been added to my life and hope that tonight becomes the start of a really good thing.

I feel anxious, but I channel my inner Betty and toughen up, make snacks, and set up the poker table. I make sure the beer is cold and the pizza is hot.

"Welcome to the cabin. Allow me to rid you of your extra cash."

#duskwood jake #jake duskwood #jake x mc #duskwood fanfiction #duskwood fandom #duskwood jake x mc #duskwood everbyte #iamjake #duskwood

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hcneylesbian-archive · 8 years ago

Note

what are some things you like and som you dislike?

like: women, wonder woman, bill and ted’s excellent adventure, dan and phil, german, stranger things, THE OFFICE, kitties!!, really any animals, voltron, that gay shit, my cat, skam, my friends, my family, etc etc

dislike: bigotry, people who walk super slow AND take up an entire hallway/walkway, heteronormativity, michael on jane the virgin, people who only stay friends w/you when they expect more, idiots

#answered #anon #thanks for asking!

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danfanciesphil · 6 years ago

Text

too high (can’t come down) by @danfanciesphil

Rating: Explicit Tags: Enemies to lovers, snow, mountains, skiing, hostility, slow burn, secrecy, longing, repression, nobility, classism, cheating, eventual sex

Ao3 Link

Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four

Chapter Five

On Friday morning, after breakfast has been cleared, Mona is going over all of the things Dan needs to stay on top of over the weekend, when someone knocks on the front door. Both of them turn to the noise, obviously startled. They’re 7,000 feet up the side of a mountain. Visitors aren’t a frequent occurrence.

In the next moment, Mona gathers herself, smooths down her jacket lapels and goes to answer the door. As soon as she opens it, Kaspar bursts through, brandishing a pair of electric blue skis, a smallish parcel under his arm, and a pile of letters secured with string.

“My gorgeous Mona!” he exclaims, dropping everything onto the side-table nearby in order to pull her into a hug. He dwarfs her small frame with his big, beefy arms, but she doesn’t struggle, patting Kaspar politely on the shoulder and waiting for him to have had his fill. “Your eyes, they shine brighter than the sun glinting off the mountain snow. Your skin is the colour of a young fawn-”

“G-good morning, Kaspar,” Mona stammers out quickly once she’s been released. Her cheeks are now tinged a deep pink. “Shall I take these?”

She reaches past him to pluck the bundle of letters from the table. “My beauty,” Kaspar says, catching her by the arm as she attempts to grapple with the skis. “Allow me to lift your burdens. I will take care of everything. I can read you each letter one by one-”

“I’m perfectly capable of reading my own mail, Kaspar,” Mona interrupts sternly, though her cheeks are practically aflame at this point. Dan watches on in amusement, pretending to be busy on the reception computer. “Though I would appreciate your help taking the skis up to the top floor.”

“My angel, if you asked I would let you sail down the mountain on by back,” Kaspar cries, to which Mona rolls her eyes, but does let out a tiny smile.

Kaspar lifts the skis onto his shoulder, then reaches for the parcel. Dan jumps to his feet so abruptly that he knocks the computer mouse off the desk. Mona and Kaspar turn in surprise at the sound.

“I’ll take the other parcel,” Dan blurts, catching the mouse from where it swings from its cord, and placing it carefully back on the mousepad. “It’s for Mr Novokoric, right?”

Mona plucks the package from Kaspar and studies the name on the label, frowning. “How did you know that?”

“He... mentioned that he’d ordered a new phone.”

Something about this response makes Mona’s eyes widen. “He… told you that?”

“Yes,” Dan says, that niggling sense that he’s missing something rearing its head once again. “Is that strange?”

Mona shrugs, but gives him a once over. “No, no, that’s fine. Take the package. You can lead the way to Mr Novokoric’s room. Show Kaspar where it is.”

“Little Dan, you are my sherpa,” Kaspar declares, grinning. Armed with the skis resting over his broad shoulder, Kaspar appears rather menacing. “Lead on.”

Ducking as Kaspar turns to and fro, expressively admiring the lobby interior as Mona blushes and accepts compliments, Dan goes to collect the package from the table. Mona summons the courage to ask Kaspar whether he’d like a coffee before he leaves again, and Kaspar’s enthusiasm for this nearly severs Dan’s neck from his shoulders.

He scurries quickly towards the stairs, assuming that Kaspar will follow once he’s done fawning over the manager. As they begin the ascent, Kaspar prattles on about how the blizzard that was forecast for today is nowhere to be seen, and that Kaspar himself knows far more than ‘those baboons with their balloons and barometers’ ever will. Dan just nods along, unable to get a word in edgeways even if he were so inclined.

In truth, Dan’s rather glad of Kaspar’s non-stop chatter, as he himself is too busy trying to understand why he’s voluntarily hurled himself into this situation. On most days, he barely has to converse with Phil at all, and that’s just fine. The less they speak to one another, the less chance there is for Dan’s day to be ruined by whatever insult Phil lets slip as casually as Kaspar comments on the weather. Now, for some reason, he’s willingly placed himself in the line of fire. For the life of him, Dan cannot understand it, but something about watching Mona and Kaspar had shaken free an urgent desire to see Phil. To deliver the first bit of good news the man has probably gotten in quite some time.

“I think now we are another thousand feet up!” Kaspar jokes as they emerge on the top floor landing.

Dan manages a polite titter in response. “It’s room eight,” he says, gesturing to Phil’s door.

The hallway is silent apart from Dan and Kaspar’s breathing from the climb. Kaspar has an excuse, given that he’s lugging enormous skis; Dan’s parcel isn’t that heavy, but he is incredibly unfit. Part of Dan wishes he could take a moment to get his breath back before knocking on Phil’s door, but explaining this would probably only confuse Kaspar, so he decides to just go for it.

He knocks, just as Kaspar begins to sing breathily - something Swiss and jaunty that Dan is pretty sure is out of tune. The door opens after a while, and Phil stands there, his shirt half-buttoned, his hair ruffled and messy. He looks like he’s just been ravished in the enormous four-poster bed Dan can see behind him.

“We- our- Kaspar- um, we have a- packages for- um. Here.” Mostly to stop his mouth from doing whatever it’s doing, Dan pushes the box into Phil’s hands.

Phil gives him a curious look, then moves his attention to Kaspar and the skis. “Oh, awesome,” he says, then seems to remember himself. “I mean, that’s excellent, Kaspar. Thank you for bringing those up.”

He takes a step to one side in the doorway, letting a still-singing Kaspar swan through into Phil’s suite. Even from his limited viewpoint, it’s clear to Dan that this room is three times the size of his own next door, and far more luxurious. There’s a chaise longue, for one thing, and a window seat, and a huge wall-mounted television.

“And where would you like me to put these, Philly?” Kaspar asks in his loud, jolly voice.

Dan’s eyebrows shoot towards the ceiling. Philly?

It might be Dan’s imagination, but he thinks he sees a light blush skimming atop Phil’s high cheekbones. “In the cupboard, if you don’t mind, Kaspar.”

“Of course,” Kaspar replies, springing out of sight somewhere deeper into the suite.

Phil turns back to Dan, then looks down at the box he’s been given. “Thanks for this,” he says, unexpectedly. “I’m going mad without a phone.”

“No problem. I mean, Mona ordered it, I’m just the delivery boy.”

Phil nods, and a painful silence falls. Dan, having always detested awkwardness, cannot let it just sit on their shoulders, so for some reason says, “try not to chuck this one off a mountain!”

It’s a joke, of course, but Phil doesn’t laugh. Instead, his lips press together, and Dan remembers - idiot, idiot, idiot - that the information about what happened to Phil’s previous phone was gleaned from eavesdropping on a phone call he had with his husband.

“I hear we’re going to be alone over the next few days,” Phil says, swiftly changing the subject, to Dan’s relief.

“Mona and Louise are away, yeah,” Dan says, not bothering to hide the dread in his voice. “There’s another couple of guests, but yeah it’ll just be me in terms of staff-”

“I thought the other couple cancelled?”

Dan freezes, staring at Phil as a gelatinous glob of horror trickles down his spine. “W-what?”

“I was speaking with Mona last night,” Phil says. “I think she said the other guests called to say they were too worried about the forecast blizzard.”

Just then, Kaspar re-emerges, arms empty of skis, beaming away as he squeezes past them back through the door. “Enjoy the rest of your day, Philly. Come now, little Dan, let us leave him to his duties.”

The corner of Phil’s mouth twitches when he hears the phrase ‘little Dan’, which is mildly embarrassing, but Dan is too boggled to feel it too deeply. Instead, Dan nods vaguely at Phil, who says nothing more, and then follows Kaspar back down the hall, past his own room, towards the stairs.

“Well of course I was going to mention it, Dan,” Mona says distractedly, taking the coffee Dan made - courtesy of Louise’s careful tuition - and placing it down in front of Kaspar, who takes her hand and kisses it. She pulls free of him quickly, flushing for the umpteenth time, and turns back to Dan. “Honestly, I thought you’d be relieved! Now you won’t have to worry about keeping guests happy. You just have to make sure the place doesn’t blow up.”

“I think you’re forgetting one guest,” Dan can’t help but point out. “You’re leaving me alone here with- with- him!”

Louise’s snicker echoes through the kitchen behind him, and Dan makes a mental note to ‘accidentally’ spray her with coffee during their next lesson.

“What’s the problem, exactly?” Mona asks, a touch impatiently. Her eyes are flicking back towards Kaspar, who is patting the chair beside his emphatically. “Louise seems to be under the impression that you and Mr Novokoric had straightened things out.”

“He apologised to Dan very nicely for upsetting him!” Louise calls unhelpfully from somewhere behind him.

Mona gives Dan a satisfied smile. “There, nothing to worry about then. Besides, I doubt you’ll see much of him. Of course you’ll need to deliver his meals to his room if he wants them. Louise can show you what needs doing with that. But apart from that, the man barely ever makes a peep.”

Begrudgingly, Dan nods, and Mona turns from him, making her way back over to Kaspar’s table. Dan watches her being flirted with for a few minutes, bemoaning his decision to take this bloody job, which has landed him a whole two days with a spoiled member of Swiss Royalty. His stomach flips as he considers the length of time stretching ahead, with just the two of them, up here, all alone. Then, he sighs, heads back into the kitchen, and calls for Louise to come and show him how to make a macchiato again.

Kaspar stays until the evening, with the excuse that he might as well stay until it’s time to escort Mona and Louise down the mountain. Louise is leaving for the weekend in order to see her daughter, Pearl, who lives with her father in Sussex, England. The nature of Louise’s job, along with certain court sentences that Dan doesn’t have the heart to ask about yet, means that she only gets to see Pearl a few times a year. It’s understandable therefore, that even though Mona has to be away this weekend as well, Louise can’t be expected to give up one of her rare opportunities to spend time with her child.

Dan stands with the two women in the lobby, trying not to let his distress leak into his expression as he drinks in the sight of them, bundled in thick coats, laden with luggage, about to abandon him up here, alone. Well, almost alone.

“I took Phil some shepherd’s pie up to his room an hour or so ago,” Louise tells Dan. “So he shouldn’t need anything until the morning.”

“Just don’t do anything to aggravate him,” Mona says in a low voice, zipping up her coat. “Remember he’s our best customer.”

Before Dan can snort derisively, the front door opens and Kaspar walks through, strutting across the lobby to place a large hand on each of the women’s shoulders. “Your carriage has arrived, pretty ladies,” he says, beaming. “I will load your cases.”

Avoiding his eye, Mona primly hands over her suitcase to Kaspar, and Louise all but chucks her own bag into his arms. Dan bites his thumbnail; in just a few minutes, they’ll be gone entirely. For two whole days.

Sensing his quiet distress, Louise comes over and squeezes her arms around him. “You’ll be fine. There’s a week’s worth of meals in the freezer. Your macchiatos haven’t killed anyone in hours. And Phil’s about as scary as a honey bee, once you see past his sting.”

“Thanks, Lou. Have fun with Pearl,” Dan replies, forcing a smile. He chooses not to mention his acute fear (and allergy) of bees.

“I’ll see you on Monday, dweeb,” she says, releasing him.

Mona takes hold of one of Dan’s hands in both of hers then, her eyes round and desperately searching for reassurance. “You’ll be alright, won’t you Dan?”

For a brief moment, he thinks about saying no, and begging her to stay. But he could never be so cruel. A sick grandmother is a pretty damn good reason to cry off a job she works insane hours for, for a couple of days. “Yeah, of course,” Dan says, stretching that forced smile. “Don’t worry about a thing, I’ve got the schedule down. Breakfast served at three, right?”

Mona sends him one of the ‘not funny’ looks she usually reserves for Louise. In a strange way, this makes him feel a bit better, like he’s been accepted as part of her trusted team. “I’ll see you in a couple of days,” she says, then gives his upper arms a quick squeeze.

Kaspar returns from loading their luggage, and the three of them head for the door, squawking about how cold it’s going to be, and how Kaspar’s inevitably going to make them fear for their lives by rocking the car to and fro, just to watch them shriek. They call a final goodbye to Dan, and with a cheery wave, Kaspar pulls the door firmly shut behind them.

For a few long moments, all Dan does is stare at the place they just were. Then, his eyes lift towards the ceiling, as if he could see straight through it, all the way up to the top floor, where Phil is… well. Who knows what he’s doing in that room. Throwing darts at a smiling photo of Dan’s face, perhaps.

He sighs, then sits down at the desk, wondering what to do with himself. In half an hour, it will be ten o’clock, the time his shift normally ends. It’s unlikely that Mr Novokoric will appear before then, so Dan could just call it a night, and go to bed. If he was really needed for any reason, Mr Novokoric could knock on his door. He sincerely hopes that he won’t do this, however. The idea of Phil seeing Dan, in his mismatching pyjamas and red-eyed from his night-time cry, is a horrifying one.

Mostly out of fear of Mr Novokoric needing him and Dan not being around, which could lead to him telling Mona he’s an incapable idiot, Dan remains where he is, rigid in his reception seat, until the clock strikes ten. Then, he gets up and begins doing all the things on the ‘end of the day’ checklist Mona went over with him numerous times. Lock the front door. Switch off the computer. Lock the door to the office. Turn off the lobby lights. Up to the mezzanine. Tidy any stray books, games or blankets left lying around. Lock the balcony doors. Go into the kitchen, turn off the oven, wipe down the countertops. Lights off. Up the stairs to the guest room floor. Lights off in the hallway. Up the final set of stairs. Open door to room. Linger in the hall staring at the light under the door of room eight. Go into room. Pyjamas. Clean teeth. Bed. Cry. Music. Stop crying. Listen. Sleep.

The snow is wet, but not as cold as he’d imagined. Dan is spread-eagled, on his back in the thick of it. Above him is an endless stretch of blue so pale it looks almost grey. He wonders if perhaps he’s laid in the sky, and is looking down at the Earth. To dispel this theory, a crow flies above him, circling once, before swooping down to perch on his chest. Dan breathes out a wash of steam.

“Hello,” Dan says.

The crow squawks. Hello.

“I’m not sure where I am,” Dan admits.

His usual state of anxiety is gone for now. Despite his ignorance of what’s happening, he’s quite enjoying not knowing what’s next. He feels buoyant and free. Unless someone were gazing down from a cloud or a very tall tree, they’d never spot him in the midst of this landscape of white. That thought is a comforting one.

The crow opens its beak again, and squawks several times. You will find yourself soon.

Dan nods thoughtfully. The crow stamps its small, twiglet feet on Dan’s chest. “It’s nice to have some time away,” Dan says. “I’m sad, but at least it’s just me that’s sad.”

The crow pecks lightly at Dan’s nose. You don’t make people sad, Dan.

“I feel like I disappoint people,” Dan says, honestly. “My parents. Beth. I’m sure I’ll eventually disappoint Mona too. And Louise. I’ve already disappointed one of the guests.”

The crow stretches out one wing, and tucks its beak into the crook, then squawks, people disappoint themselves. They expect things you cannot always provide. This is not your fault.

“Maybe.” Dan considers the crow’s point, staring into its mass of oil-slick feathers. A jet, beady eye pokes out, holding his gaze. “You’re very wise.”

The crow extends both wings. And you are stronger than you know.

Before Dan can say anything else, the crow flaps its wings, beating gusts of cool air into Dan’s face, and takes off, soaring into the pale sky. It flies higher and higher, until it’s nothing but a black speck, and then out of view entirely. The snow is melting from his body heat beneath him, and he is beginning to sink down. For a moment, Dan is tempted to let himself be engulfed, to disappear into the white plains of this place. But he knows the crow is watching him, even from wherever it flew. The crow is waiting for Dan to move, to fight the feeling of unworthiness that’s pushing him down. So, he sits up; the cold snow slides down his back. He grits his teeth, focused on a faraway melody, and stands.

Dan wakes up in his bed with a sense of vigour about him. His dream had been unusual, to say the least, but has instilled a determination in him. He’s got the lay of the land now; he can run this place for forty-eight hours. There aren’t even any guests to look after, aside from one. He gets ready quickly, shrouded in his new cape of confidence, and goes downstairs to set up for a likely needless breakfast.

As soon as he walks into the mezzanine lounge, he stops short at the sight of Phil Novokoric sat at one of the indoor tables, reading a book, a mug of coffee in his hand. The cape of confidence flies off Dan’s shoulders, sweeping off into the stratosphere.

“Oh. Good- good morning, Mr Novokoric,” Dan manages, only stumbling slightly as he edges towards the kitchen. “Um, Phil, I mean.”

Phil lifts his head from his book, azure eyes glinting. “Good morning, Dan.”

“You’ve… already got a coffee, then?”

Phil lifts an eyebrow, looking briefly down at the mug he’s holding. “It would appear so.”

“Great,” Dan says, resisting the urge to roll his eyes at the sarcasm. It takes a moment for the implication of this to sink in, given that Louise couldn’t have made it for him, but when it does, Dan narrows his eyes. “How?”

“It’s an instant coffee,” Phil says, wrinkling his nose.

“Oh,” Dan says, then his stomach flips. He’s going to have to ask, isn’t he? Oh, crap. “Would- would you like a macchiato?”

Phil assesses him carefully, setting his book down. “Alright,” he says after a moment.

Oh no. Dan’s been practicing like mad for two days with Louise, but he’s still not totally confident about his aptitude with the coffee machine. Nevertheless, he’s offered now, and he has to grant the request of the customer, no exceptions. Bracing himself for ridicule, or possibly just a sneer of contempt, Dan nods, and disappears into the kitchen.

He makes four different macchiatos, each of which seem to turn out slightly differently, much to his dismay. He tries to time the frothing of the milk, to clean the nozzle rigorously each time. In the end, he just selects the one that most resembles Louise’s perfect macchiatos that she can seem to whip up without looking, and takes a deep breath before bringing it out to Phil. He’s trembling as he places it down on the table, which Phil definitely notices, but doesn’t comment on, thankfully.

Phil peers at the coffee, scrutinising, then brings it to his nose for a gentle sniff. “Remembered the caramel this time, then,” he mutters, and Dan only just stops himself from finding the caramel syrup in the kitchen and upending it over his head.

Phil takes a cautious sip, then another, and then an actual gulp. He lowers the mug, eyebrows raised, and places it carefully back on the table. Dan only realises he’s hovering, watching Phil’s reaction with hawk-like attention, when Phil fixes him with a bemused stare and says, “thanks.”

He turns his attention back to his book, and Dan realises he’s being dismissed. “Oh. No problem.”

He steps back with an absurd little bow of his head; Phil might let out a tiny smile, but Dan can’t be sure if it’s because he thinks Dan’s an idiot, or because of something amusing in his book. Either way, he needs to leave before he humiliates himself properly. He heads back into the kitchen and unearths one of Louise’s homemade loaves of bread, which he then cuts four thick slices of. He toasts them under the grill, then spreads them with butter and plum jam. He puts two on one plate, and two on another, then carries them out of the kitchen. He places one plate down in front of Phil, who looks up in surprise, and then scurries downstairs to reception with his own plate before Phil can say anything. Dan eats his breakfast in between chores - sweeping the lobby, unlocking the doors, and setting up for the day.

Eventually, he runs out of things to do, and though he really would rather not go back upstairs and make more embarrassing small talk with Phil, he has no other choice. He picks up his empty plate from the desk, and heads back up to the mezzanine area. Mercifully, Phil’s table is now devoid of Phil, though his book and mugs are still there. He’s taken two bites out of one slice of toast. It’s been a while though, so Dan assumes he must have finished, and takes the plate into the kitchen along with his own. It seems a waste to throw an entire untouched piece of toast into the bin, so Dan scoffs that one too, humming a Muse song as he chews, and washing plates. As he’s swallowing the last bit, he hears the sound of a throat clearing, and turns, only slightly choking on toast crumbs, towards the noise.

Phil is at the serving hatch, his big crimson ski jacket on, and a faintly amused expression on his face. He pushes the two mugs across the hatch. “What is that you’re humming?” He frowns, as if trying to place it. “Sounds familiar.”

“Oh, it’s a Muse song.” Dan’s hands are soapy, dripping at his sides. He shakes the suds off them, self-consciously.

“Right,” Phil says. “Never liked Muse. All their songs sound the same.”

Another reason to detest this fool. Clearly he has no taste in music. Aside from… classical, perhaps.

“Each to their own,” Dan says in an attempt at brightness, then walks over to collect the dirty mugs from him. Just as he turns to leave, Phil reaches out and catches Dan’s wrist. It’s a light, soft touch, and is gone again the next second, but Dan feels as if he’s been zapped with 10,000 volts. He freezes, just about managing to hang onto the cups. “Er-”

“Come skiing with me,” Phil says, knocking Dan out of orbit.

(Chapter Six!)

#phan #phanfic #too high #enemies to lovers au

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ramajmedia · 6 years ago

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10 Marvel Comics You Need To Read Before MCU Phase 4 | ScreenRant

With so many Marvel Studios projects in development, it might be time for a refresher course. Between sequels, new properties, and a handful of new television series on the way, Marvel fans have plenty on their plate. However, if you have a few blind spots in your Marvel knowledge or simply don't read comics, this list should help fill some blanks. For this list, we've compiled some landmark Marvel comics that correspond to the next few Marvel projects.

Never read a Moon Knight book? Who are the Eternals, anyway? Don't worry, here's some recommended reading to prepare you for the onslaught of content that Marvel Studios has up its sleeve. Here are 10 Marvel Comics You Need To Read Before MCU Phase 4.

RELATED: 10 Characters Who Should Probably Retire From The MCU Soon

10 Black Widow: The Finely Woven Thread

Based on photos, casting, and rumors, there isn't any one Black Widow book that the film is based on. Seeing as the movie is setting up to be an amalgam of trademark Black Widow elements, this modern-day classic might be a great spot for new readers to jump on board.

The Finely Woven Thread by Nathan Edmondson and Phil Noto is the gritty spy thriller that fans of the movies have always wanted. Between Edmondson's compelling mystery and Noto's painterly art, this is a must-have for Black Widow fans and new readers alike.

RELATED: 10 Characters Who Should Probably Retire From The MCU Soon

This story probably won't reflect the plot of the movie, but it shows just how compelling a Black widow solo adventure could be (and has been in comics for decades now).

9 The Mighty Thor: Thunder In Her Veins

With Natalie Portman's Jane Foster gearing up to wield the hammer, fans should probably pick up Jason Aaron's work on Thor. She has her first adventures as Thor in Aaron's Thor: The Goddess of Thunder, but for a while, her identity was a secret. However, the reveal of Jane Foster as Thor has created a new fan-favorite for many and one of the most compelling character arcs in Marvel's recent history.

RELATED: 10 Other MCU Characters Who Might Be Worthy Of Wielding Thor's Hammer

The Goddess of Thunder is a great starting point, but fans that want to skip the mystery should pick up The Mighty Thor: Thunder in Her Veins. This story arc begins a true epic that fans will want to read in full. Not only will it have you in tears by the end, but it also helps set up one of the better recent crossover events, War of the Realms.

8 Moon Knight: From The Dead

Moon Knight, arguably the most underrated Marvel character in existence, is finally getting his own series on Disney Plus. If you've never heard of him, let Warren Ellis and Declan Shalvey's From the Dead be your introduction.

Who is Moon Knight? He's an ex-mercenary with multiple personalities possessed by a moon god. He fights anything from mobsters and robots to vampires and ninjas. The Marvel universe is a crazy place, and From the Dead shows how Moon Knight can tackle any corner of it with style and brutality.

This run is an anthology of different Moon Knight stories, and between Ellis' trademark wit and Shalvey's kinetic artwork, it'll hook newcomers with ease. If you feel compelled to read further — and you will — check out the runs by Charlie Huston and Jeff Lemire.

7 Neil Gaiman's Eternals

For most movie fans, the Eternals are a bit of a mystery. The Eternals are essentially evolved humans — ancient prototypes of humans created by Celestials, which fans will remember from Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2. Marvel legend Jack Kirby created the characters, but for a modern introduction, check out Neil Gaiman's Eternals.

RELATED: 10 Ways The Eternals Movie Might Connect To The Wider MCU

His series contains the cast of the upcoming film as well as the official (retconned) backstory of the Eternals. It's quite likely that this book is the basis for the movie as well, so definitely pick it up.

6 Hawkeye: My Life As A Weapon

My Life as a Weapon by Matt Fraction and David Aja is the basis for Marvel's upcoming Hawkeye series on Disney Plus, right down to the show's title card. It deals with Hawkeye's life outside of his career as an Avenger, as well as the training of his apprentice, Kate Bishop.

RELATED: Hawkeye Disney Plus: 5 MCU Characters We Want To See Return (And 5 We Don't)

Hawkeye's somewhat-but-not-so ordinary life is a lot more compelling than you might think, and once you read this series, he'll likely become your favorite Avenger. It's got great action, witty humor, and some pretty innovative issues — entire books are told through sign language, and one issue even stars his dog.

5 All-New Captain America

Now that Cap has passed the shield to Sam Wilson in Avengers: Endgame, fans won't being seeing him again until The Falcon and the Winter Soldier on Disney Plus. Can Sam Wilson fill Steve Rogers' shoes? Well, he already has. All-Captain America by Rick Remender is Sam Wilson's first adventure as the winged Captain America.

In the first arc, Sam Wilson must thwart an emerging Hydra threat while living up to his new mantle. This series is proof that Sam is the man for the job, even if fans aren't ready to let go of Steve Rogers.

4 Ms. Marvel: No Normal

As a nerdy superhero fan from Jersey City, Kamala is so familiar with the Avengers' antics in New York that she even writes fan fiction about her favorite heroes. When she acquires Inhuman powers, she names herself after her idol, Captain Marvel.

RELATED: 10 Things You Should Know About Ms. Marvel

Kamala is already a well-established character with plenty of different appearances and team-ups throughout the comics, so where better to start than from the beginning? Ms. Marvel: No Normal by G. Willow Wilson and Adrian Alphona contains her origin story and is a must-read for any Marvel fan.

3 She-Hulk: Single Green Female

She-Hulk is more than just female Hulk. Jennifer Walters is a character that not many people are familiar with, but unlike her cousin Bruce Banner, she actually enjoys being the Hulk. A great entry point before her Disney Plus series is Dan Slott's She-Hulk: Single Green Female, where Jen must balance her life as the Hulk with her very demanding career as a lawyer.

RELATED: 10 Storylines Disney+'s She-Hulk Series Could Use

She's not a scientist like Bruce, but a lawyer in the emerging field of superhero law. Naturally, superhero lawsuits come with plenty of cameos and crossovers, but this is very much a She-Hulk story that manages to stay breezy and fun while distinguishing Jen Walters as her own unique character.

2 House of M and Vision

The Disney Plus series WandaVision is a head-scratcher for most fans, so this entry cheats a little to give readers the best primer.

The concept of the show seems to be based on a combination of two different books: House of M by Brian Michael Bendis and Vision by Tom King. In House of M, Scarlet Witch loses control of her powers and alters reality for the worse. In Vision, the titular hero tries to settle down and have a family, until everything goes horribly wrong.

Concept art for the series depicts Wanda and Vision in an idyllic, sitcom-esque lifestyle, but everything is not what it seems. This suggests influences from both of these excellent stories, so definitely check them out.

1 Doctor Strange: The Way of the Weird

The last two Avengers films prove that Stephen Strange has come a long way since his solo film in 2016. Since his next film is said to be the MCU's first horror movie, it might benefit fans to pick up a comic where Strange is experienced and more than familiar with the scariest aspects of magic.

The Way of the Weird by Jason Aaron is Strange is his absolute strangest. For him, protecting reality is just another average day, despite some of the creepiest and most grotesque threats always knocking at his door. Chris Bachalo's art makes this an especially unique read — if you want to see what a Doctor Strange horror movie might look like, then look no further.

NEXT: 10 Scenes That Define The MCU

source https://screenrant.com/marvel-comics-read-mcu-phase-4/

#screenrant

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august-wildflowers · 8 years ago

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The secret life of Dan Howell: Chapter 3

Summary

Dan and Phil live their dream life in London, until one day Dan disappears, leaving only his phone and a briefcase behind to help Phil find him. Phil embarks on an adventure through Dan’s past and discovers that their perfect life wasn’t as perfect as it seemed.

Word Count: 1.5K

chapter one / chapter two

Authors note: Hi guys, if anyone is reading this and would like to help me edit out typos and other things pls dm me. Thank you for reading, I’ve been wanting to write this for a long time now.

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Chapter 3: The report

Dan Howell: 2008 Report and Characteristics

December 28, 2008

We were alerted of Daniel James Howell after he attempted and almost successfully committed a burglary in March. We keep eye on young promising teens who show potential for the Special Operations division of MI6. Dan is extremely talented with an IQ that surpasses that of others his age. We reached out to Dan, in hopes that we would be able to recruit him; He quickly declined. On the 11th of March, Dan contacted us again, this time he accepted our previous offer. He began training a week later.

While he’s still in training, he’s shown a promising amount of potential in his preformance. In his time with us, he’s become fluent in french, german, russian, and chinese and has also completed his martial arts training in record time. These are just two of his accomplishments. We believe that he could begin going on missions in 2009.

Below is the rest of his file.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Phil couldn’t breathe. His pulse was racing and he could feel his tears as they flooded his lap. Dan had lied to him, throughout their entire relationship, none of was true. To Dan, phil was just a cover. Every moment they had shared had been a lie, every joke, every conversation, even every youtube video was just part of a persona that Dan had created to disguise himself. In plain sight too, no one would ever think that Dan Howell, clumsy, awkward, lazy, Dan could be a spy.

He had to talk to someone, he had to call Pj. He’s tell phil that this was just a prank that Dan had thought of. Phil’s breathing was still heavy as he reached out for his phone. The smell of febreeze was still filling up his nose, he had never hated the smell of ‘fresh linen’ more.

His fingers taped his screen desperately. HE slammed down on Pj’s contact so hard that for a second, Phil thought that he broke his phone.

1 ring

2 rings

3 rings, then he heard it, Pj’s calming voice.

“Hey Phil”

“Peej... I need you to come over… it’s urgent” He let out in the most desperate sentence he had ever let out. Pj remained silent, thinking probably. All phil could hear was himself panting and crying.

“Ok, there better be a solid explanation when I get there though” phil nodded into the phone, as if Pj could see him. “Also mate, get yourself some Hot chocolate and some tissues, you sound like a disaster”.

Phil let out a sarcastic chuckle then hung up, already reaching for some tissues.

An hour later, Pj arrived at the flat covered in mud and rainwater. Despite his appearance, Pj embraced phil into a hug as soon as he saw Phil’s red, puffy eyes.

“So you heard anything from Dan yet” He asked, Phil didn’t respond instead he motioned for Pj to follow him.

“No Phil, I’m not going to follow you until you tell me what’s going on. First the cryptic phone call from dan a few nights ago, then you call me bawling your eye’s out. I’m worried Phil, talk to me”.

“He gone Pj. I don’t think he’s coming back”. His voice sounded rougher than usual.

“What do mean he’s not coming back?”

“He isn’t he we think he is” Phil whispered just loud enough for Pj to hear.

“Phil, you’re not making any sense”

“THE DAN HOWELL WE KNOW DOESN’T EVEN EXIST, HE NEVER DID. HE WAS LYING TO US EVER SINCE 2009, SINCE WE MOVED IN TOGETHER. I NEVER KNEW HIM, HE DIDN’T TRUST ME ENOUGH APPARENTLY. I’M NOTHING BUT A COVER PJ”.

Phil didn’t mean to yell. He couldn’t keep it all inside, there was too many emotions there, too many unsaid feelings.

“Look peej, it’s just better if you see it yourself”

“Show me then” Pj said wrapping phil into another hug. Phil nodded, tears were streaming down his face again. He led Pj upstairs and into Dan’s room where the briefcase remained open and it’s contents spread out on the floor.

“What in the world” Pj stammered. “What’s all of this”

“This,” Phil said in between sniffles “is the secret life of Dan Howell”

Pj didn’t speak. Silence seemed to be ever present ever since Dan disappeared. When he finally did though he asked about the wads of money.

“Do you think all of this is real?” he asked. He’d been counting it, holding it up to the light, analyzing it as if it were a bomb that could go off at any moment.

“I think so” He handed Pj the passports.

“Look at these, they’re all of Dan. Same picture, different names though, for example” Phil took out the spanish passport.

“Here it says his name is ‘Daniel Cortez’ and on the french one,” Phil motioned to another passport “It says his name is ‘Thomas Dubouis’ Most of the birthdays stay the same, June 11, 1991”.

“So money and passports” Pj questioned “what does this mean, that Dan was a criminal, or just someone with a weird hobby?”

Phil shook his head, and turned around to grab the guns and the files out from under Dan’s bed. He had put them there after their conversation on the phone. He wasn’t sure if it was wise to show them to Pj. Now, it seemed like the only way to make him believe that he was about to say next.

Pj’s eye’s darted straight to the guns as soon as phil pulled them out.

“I think, well I’m certain, that Dan was a spy. I found these files” Phil gripped the manilla folders.

“See” Phil pointed to the white label with the words ‘Dan Howell: 2009 report and characteristics’.

“Before I called you I read one of them, it talks about Dan being recruited for something called the ‘MI6 Special Operations Division’. It say’s Dan’s highly intelligent, he never even mentioned being above average in school”. Phil blurted, he wasn’t sure if he should be telling anyone this.

Pj sat still, his eyes still fixated on the guns.

“The file marked 2008 says Dan excelled at running, it marked his mile time at 4 minutes. The Dan Howell I thought I knew could barely reach for his computer charger. Under abilities, it states he was an expert at Martial arts fighting and shooting. I quote, ‘never missed a shot, nore matter the consequence’. I haven’t even read the rest of the files” Phil was almost out of breath.

Pj still remained unresponsive.

“I wanna investigate” Phil stated “I’m going to track him down”.

“You want to what?” He finally responded.

“I want to go back to Dan’s old town, I want to talk to Dan’s teacher, his parents, anyone who knew him back then. I wanna get to know who he really was”.

“You’re going to get yourself killed” Pj was now whispering, his eyes back on the guns. Phil couldn’t help but notice how still Pj was being.

“Why do you think that?”

“Can’t you see, all of this, it’s nut’s. Dan isn’t who he said he was. Maybe it’s a good thing he never told you” Pj remained calm, his face held no expression.

“There’s a reason that Dan kept all of this from you, don’t go chasing something you have no reason meddling in”.

Pj stood up, his eyes glaring at phil.

“I’m not going to help you get yourself killed”.

“I never asked for your help Pj” Phil affirmed furiously. He stood up, leveling himself with Pj.

“Give me three reasons why you want to investigate this”

“I want to know who Dan really is”

“It’s not worth it” Pj barked back

“It is if you love someone”

Pj didn’t responded, his eyes softened just a bit though.

“I love him Pj. I love everything he is, his voice, his dimples, his ideas. I’ve loved him from the moment I met him back in 2009, when I certain of our relationship. I love him now, in 2017, when everything is out of place. I only know two things right now, that I love Dan, and that he’s somewhere out there and he needs my help. I don’t care if he lied, now I get to find him and get to know every that he ever was and is. And is I find him Pj, when I find him. I’m going to get to know him all over again, and fall in love all over again” Phil could feel himself about to cry again.

“Goodbye Phil” Pj said, and walked out of Dan’s room, slamming the door on the way out.

As soon as he heard the door slam, phil burst into action. He booked a train ticket, straight to Dan’s old town. He packed quickly and before he ran out of breath wrote a note to Dan, just in case he came back to flat while Phil was out.

Once he was done, he plopped himself onto the floor. He closed his eyes and imagined a pair of golden eye’s staring at him. He loved Dan Howell.

#woot there it is #love #Phanfic #dan and phil #daniel howell #phil lester #phan #phandom #dan and phil games #spy au #au #agnst #pj liguori #kinda a dick in this fic sorry #amazingphil #danisnotonfire

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cafephan · 8 years ago

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dan and phil play golf with friends #2: a summary

DanandPhilGames caddy lads "you loved it, you were like yes the golf lifestyle, i'm wearing expensive polo shirts i'm sipping an overpriced drink, im nattering with the business fellows and hitting that ball" says dan whilst well in the knowledge most of us are shut away in our bedrooms in our pyjamas with not a penny to our name and sipping on tap water "so we're here in the dan and phil golf club and there is a certain dress code, dan" i like to take this as phil foreshadowing the beautiful fashion choices dan is making during this singapore trip even though he clearly isn't foreshadowing anything moment of appreciation for the singapore trip's outfit choices tho please moment over thirty three seconds in we get the first fond glance, hopefully the first of many "the only short sleeved short i have is creased, phil" the look that he's giving phil reeaaalllyyy makes me wonder how it got creased... "i don't care, just go get it on" says phil the fashion meister helllooooo moth shirt my favourite my best friend my one true love "we had green shit in our hair for like three hours after we put these on" who needs context amirite "dan thought i threw these away but no i've been secretly hiding them" ok but how is that so domestic "look how erect my flag is today" / "list of things you should like never say again...." (unless they're off camera to me) ((i finished the quote that the jumpcut edited out)) "you know the rules. we can only do one dan vs phil per game" is that a rule? have they said that before? okay sure let's roll with it they're playing for the burger socks from a few liveshows ago "i ordered this for a friend but they sent two" sure phil a company would clearly go out of their way to send two of the same product meaning they'd be out of profit,,, your friend definitely didn't just give them back to you "do i want to eat them or wear them?" i'm certain that this is not the first time that sentence has come out of dan's mouth "are you excited by that? do you want that? on your feet?" / "i so want the cheese on my foot." *jumpcut* *phil says literally one word and dan is already grinning at him* f o n d "this is something to watch like a sport, and enjoy like a sport" unless you're making a summary of this video meaning you have to rewind every two seconds thanks phil "lingering banter... just enjoy the time between jokes" *both giggle like the dorks they are* "you liked the last one, so strap yourselves in for some golf" "we need to customise our balls" can dan go one gaming vid without dragging tumblr like i go through all of this effort for you pls don't drag me you little curly haired shit "[about the colour of his ball] i would call that moonlight dolphin" dan has gone for plain white this time does this represent him emotionally who knows at the time of filming i like symbolism and connotations they're fun "oh my gosh, it's like... goodness has returned" phil why are you so cute "i'm calling our room dogs9000 today" / "very appropriate" first of all why is it appropriate second of all is that what they called their room on the tour bus "stop. they just do what they want. stop telling them what to do." / "i guess that's valid. i'm sorry, butterflies, you do you." "i'm like so oasis right now" "ancient egypt is my favourite historical period so i'd like to delve into there" i think i've found the next fic trend why are they using the chatroom when their chairs are literally touching and from the front angle it looks as if their hands are too "my pole is so tall you can't even see the flag" again my gut instinct is that it isn't the first time those words have come out of phil's mouth "... and other sentences that phil will never say again" (unless they're off camera to me) ((i finished his quote for him again he should pay me for this)) "beginnu" / "golf it up" dan has more fluidity in his hand movements than phil does take what you will from that information "here we go" / "here we golf" tag urself "oh you're inside my ball again" / "we're already freaking out inside each other" *phil laughs a lot and grins then followed by a mysterious jumpcut* "bit too much power for danny there" dan is already being a sore loser but he can't help but be all smiley that phil is all smiley and jokey phil cheers him on still "if i can get it in now, it'll be okay" i've said it once and i'll say it again... definitely not the first time those words have been said by danny boy they clean up the whole two computer debacle "i'm deceived by the curves" joint vibing and dancing to the music "you're in africa the hole is in antarctica" mister geography "you absolute cheeky little twit" a new addition to the list of fond insults from dan to phil sore loser dan continues to thrive phil manages to screw up literally the easiest shot in the world??? i love you boy but oh how you suck at this game and now dan is smiling again what a sadistic lil tot "welcome to the land of pain and misery" thanks dan for my new bio dan's lovely lady gaga rendition gets cut short by a jumpcut wtf give me the good stuff i deserve it oh he finished the rendition what a pair of lungs on that kid *phil definitely says 'oh shit'* "i didn't swear then" yes you did just accept your potty mouth perfect opportunity to kick the old branding to the curb a girl can dream ok "oh you're going to be stuck for ten hours, phil, how is this going to go" "i can't even see myself... oh i went in" seriously how many times in one video can my gut instinct tell me dan's said these sentences before in his lifetime "the power of wobbling knocked me in" "that felt good to me" "my lovely philly lumps, check 'em out" what a beautiful rendition phil i would buy it on itunes / "...things you should never say again, volume twelve" cocky dan strikes again "you okay there?" / "i'm feeling very emotional about this" "par? more like cheat" / "that's par for the course" please stop talking over each other this summary takes long enough as it is without having to rewind ten times "oh we're the same now" / "now we're even" / "i was so happy with my lead" / "guess we're going to have to cut our feet in half" / "yeah..." *phils cute laugh* "that's obviously just saying go for it... but how much power?" / "smack it" i imagine this is phil's outlook on life six minutes fifty four seconds in... rip headphone users "we're gonna take like eleven goes at this" not if you both strikeout, my guy "this is so much harder than the last one" phil please don't make this too easy for me "please release us from this hell" i'd like to thank the universe for the occasional slivers of dan skin we see through the gaps in his shirt buttons "i'll happily sit here for three and a half hours now whilst phil gets it in" ... oh come on it's definitely not the first time he's said that sentence drinking game: take a shot every time they say 'yes' or 'yeah' that'll get you drink awfully quick "get out of my zone! stop touching me!" / "knock. knock." stop talking over each other please i beg of you "i'll touch you when i please..." okay dan you are aware of the camera pointing at you right phil's reaction is all of us at dan just saying that sentence "... don't say that again" (unless it's off camera to me) ((now i'm apparently finishing phil's sentences for him, he should pay me too)) "i'm so sorry for this whole video" ty dan cocky dan is here to stay, it seems like dan got so cocky that he fucked up i love life "that's what you get for being cocky!" i love phil "i'm out of strokes? that's how bad i was?" i don't know why my gut instinct is telling me phil's said that before but... anyway "you are now... eight over my score, phil." look at dans hands he's dying to do a mr burns impression and say excellent "that was a mystery adventure if i ever saw one" "*sigh* oh phil" "phil, phil, dear me" in all the videos of this game i've watched before nobody managed to make that pillar shot and yet dan does it on his first try...... sure okay "king of golf. yes." / "shush" phil made it too yay "guys if you're feeling like i'm just going to lose, i'm really going to try from now on" he looked at the camera like he meant it *dan looks over* "phil's gonna take this so seriously. no more bants, just solid golf seriousness" dan do you just stop listening to yourself when you talk "solid whacking" / "okay in the list of things that are serious, saying 'solid whacking', that's- that's not up there" *dan two seconds later* "so i'm just gonna whack it" "boom... slide... crack" i'm not even trying to analyse that "how would anakin do this" "i was using the force! did you see?" / *dan smiles fondly* "no i didn't" "if you whack me over the edge i'm going to bury you alive" "shit fucking wank fuck" "how did you get that wrong?" i'm still asking that question to phil about that other hole dan i feel you "that was sexual" / "that was the most erotic math based experience i've ever had" / "i liked that" "the skateboarding teenager inside me wants to go back and do this" / "could skateboarding teenage phil ever have skated around that?" / "he would have said that he could do it, but he would've fallen off... and hit his head" / "it's the trying that counts" "oh philly philly two whack" the game either wants phil to win and keeps sabotaging dan, dan wants phil to win and he keeps sabotaging himself, or dan is just that bad at the game he keeps fucking up i'd put my money on the latter "i want to have children with this course" first of all there will be fics of this and i will turn over in my grave, secondly poor janice :( "shitty fuck no i need to be in a straight line" "i wouldn't trust that with a barge pole" king of the english language "miss miss" phil being the ever supportive best friend "lara croft would... love this" "remember that you owe me two strokes" / *sassily* "no i don't" / "yeah you do, the game broke" / "that's-that's your fault" / *laughs* "no it's not!" this is literally the conversation that defines their friendship and it is beautiful "he's the one that's trolling me by stopping my ball" dan pls "i'm going in" / "do it, phil" you're just making it too damn easy for me "i would watch golf on tv if phil commentated it" dan you would watch anything that phil was even remotely involved with dan the sore loser back again dan is doing some kind of animal impression and if sounds as if it's a bird in heat or something "you wanna say that's not count (*literally dan wtf*) see the comments. they'll be- they'll be ju-thirsty for justice." not considering you drag us every chance you get you lil shit #teamphil also dan is tumbling over his words so much this video is he okay dan makes up a stupid penalty for phil to do because the game apparently hates him but in reality he just sucks, and phil goes along with it because he's phil how the hell did dan manage to jump over the high wall "i just left clicked and i bobbed.. i wasn't supposed to bob" "that's definitely not in- okay you did it" oooh one point difference "oh i didn't get some dinghy time then" "how ya doin? nice to see you there" "believe in the power" "you did a much more satisfying one than me" "your non-gender specific caddy gimp would need to be fanning you..." / "caddy gimp?" / "yeah" / "i'd just want them to put me on a camel, give me a pina colada, play golf for me... and i'd just be like this on my laptop" we all know phil loves his pina colada *wink wink* "... yeah that's the dream" well we know dan's opinion on pina colada don't we *wink wink* "leona lewis would hate you" shots fired "yes i did just cheat by looking at your bar" / "you can't look at my bar!" / "oh well i just did!" cocky dan back with his questionable sounds "he's thinking about how tasty your ball is right now" "yes sphinx daddy, let's go" "climbing inside the pyramid vagina" "you've got a mystical glow about you" "you're kind of ruining the vibe" "look how much you're illuminating the whole" dan the cocky sod literally looks like a child rn "i don't know what's happening but i'm excited by it" did phil just channel his inner chandler from friends bc that is all too similar to the chandler quote "tease it in" / "never say that again" "that deserves extra points that was incredible" proud bf phil "ooh toasty ball" they're helping each other along aw "i mean fuck the dan vs phil board... this is a prize worth playing for" *dan shakes the burger socks* the game broke so they restarted it and they now have the same score wooow "this is not how god wanted it but this is what's happening" phil says as he takes his two shot penalty "i don't think, erm, if god does exist, in any form, that He would give a shit about this game, phil" / "i think he would" dan gives phil a full rundown on his math-based plan "you copied my strats!" "let me just sniff these socks" / "ew" "are you more of a leftie or a rightie?" / "i'm gonna be... rightie as that is what i write with" rip all you leftie philgirls "how do you know? you don't know left and right" bloody hell dan calm down "it's a bridge to cleopatra's bedroom" *phil lands on the pyramid* "is he wearing any underwear?" "everyone who doesn't know math right now is just like... whirring with calculations right now" actually i'm just sat here typing this so screw you howell you don't know me "i'm just going to max power it over here" did anyone else think of the simpsons? when homer changes his name? anyone at all? okay then "that means i win!" phil shouts enthusiastically and claps his hands together phil continues to clap it ends as a draw!!!! "so does that mean we've gotta share the socks?" "i want the cheese- i want the lettuce" phil bless you "it'll be like those people that get like best friend necklaces that complete each other except for us it's burger socks." *modelling the socks* "look at those dank socks" "the best bit is when you went through the sphinx's mouth and when you went through the uterus" they'd be up for another vid yes please i need one!!!!!! n e e d!!! the twilight course would be next "now we're gonna pick the green stuff out of our hair... go on phil, groom me like a monkey" dan. "get that moss out" seriously. dan. danisnotsandy auterusphil (which of them did this) also phil pretended to eat whatever he just supposedly groomed from dans head okay eventful video.

#THIS TOOK SO LONG TO DO WHAT THE FUCK #sorry this is so long but also not sorry #hope you enjoy #gaming vid summaries

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shortiegardengnome · 8 years ago

Text

Date Night - Part Two - Phil Lester

Part 2 of Date Night Fic.

Warnings: None.

Phil and I had gotten closer since that day and had been acting completely smitten much to Dan’s dismay who took pleasure in making fake gagging noises every time he walked into the room to find us being affectionate with each other. Despite being completely comfortable in our new roles as people who have feelings for each other we still hadn’t been on the date that Phil had asked me on until finally we made plans to go see a movie and have dinner. I agreed feeling butterflies erupt in my stomach at the thought of going on a proper date with Phil Lester; the guy who I had a crush on for a long time now. What was I going to wear? How the hell would I do my hair and make-up? I know that he has seen me on my bad days where I look like I just rolled around on the ground for a little bit before seeing him but that was before I knew he had feelings for me. Not that it changed much but it meant that I wanted to look really nice for our night out. So I pulled out a lot of stops for this night, donning my favorite green dress which made my boobs look really good with my black leather jacket and a pair of black pumps. I looked admittedly amazing outfit wise, make-up and hair wise I decided to go simple, making sure to only emphasize my eyes slightly with silver eye shadow. My hair was out in loose curls which sat nicely around my face. I was ready for my date physically at least; mentally was another story altogether. Mentally, I was a mess of nerves showing itself in the trembling in my hands and my palms being sweaty. Dear lord I wanted tonight to go down well.

A knock sounded at the door startling me out of me deep concentration. I looked up at the time to see that it had already reached 5:30pm which was when Phil said to expect him. Looks like he was on time for once; I’m going to go ahead and take that as a good sign that he was as excited as I was. Giving myself one last look over in the mirror to make sure that everything was in place, I grabbed my purse and headed towards the front door, all the while reminding myself to breathe and that it was ‘just Phil’ though that proved to be a considerable problem and Phil was never a ‘just’ never to me, he was always this extraordinary person of light and happiness, a literal ray of sunshine as Dan would put it. Probably the only person who had the same amount of appreciation for Phil, though probably not quite in the same manner of affection.

I opened the door in an attempt t a breezy fashion and smiled brightly when I saw Phil waiting on my doorstep for me. He was wearing his practically trademark black skinny jeans and his red button up shirt with white hearts scattered on it, which was my favorite shirt on him. Even though in this context it was completely cheesy. Phil looked up from his phone and I felt his eyes run up and down my outfit before he beamed at me. “Hey, you look beautiful,” Phil reached out with a pro-offered hand and I took it delicately, letting Phil take me out of the door and closing it behind me. Phil pulled me closer to his side and intertwined our fingers and nudging my side. “Ready to go?” Phil smiled down at me and I nodded; a tiny bit nervous about this whole endeavor.

“What exactly did you have planned for tonight anyway?” Phil had asked me when we decided to go out that I let him plan what we’d be doing, so I basically had no idea what we were doing tonight.

Phil winked at me and said with a confidence that I hadn’t seen in a while “First I think that we could go for some dinner? How does Chinese sound?” I grinned at his hopeful expression, Chinese was my absolutely favorite food to have, quite possibly the best guilty pleasure on the planet, and Phil knew it too.

“Have I ever once in the time you’ve known me said ‘no’ to Chinese?” Phil shook his head as we kept walking towards the restaurant where Phil had made a reservation. “Then you know I’m always happy with Chinese.” Our hands swung back and forth between us playfully.

Phil took me to my favorite Chinese Restaurant in London and we were escorted to a table for two with a partition separating us from the rest of the restaurant for a little bit of privacy. Phil held out my chair and I smiled at his act of chivalry and he kissed my check before sitting down in his own seat opposite mine. A waitress was with us within seconds.

A blonde girl, who looked about 17 years old with a cheery demeanor that could compete with Phil himself probably. She has beautiful grey-green eyes and her hair up in a pony tail curling at the end. With a dimple in her right cheek and a smile before asking us if there was anything that she could get us at the moment. We both looked at each other before scrambling to pick up our menus; I quickly order my usual favorites with a look at Phil to make sure that everything was okay. He nodded and with a look at his won menu ordered his own food. When our menus were taken away by little miss sunshine. Phil and I didn’t have anything else distracting us; I felt admittedly a little awkward but taking a moment I leaned forward and started talking to Phil.

“So how was Vid-con with Dan?” I leaned forward to hear him properly because despite the partition there was a layer of general hum throughout the restaurant which made it just that little bit harder to hear Phil without him raising his voice to a near shout or me leaning forward, so I decided to take the easier route and lean towards him.

“Vid-con was great,” Phil beamed and he then told me all about his adventures in America with Dan; about how he met up with other Youtubers, went on a trip with Cat to an amusement park, the panels he spoke at, the fans he got to meet and all the presents he received from them. I had to admit his fan had excellent taste in shirts. It was all really amazing how he got to travel and do all of these things, whilst still doing a job that genuinely made him happy and enabled him to live with his best friend.

He asked me what happened to me since he went to England but as a journalist who writes the advice column there wasn’t much that could happen to me in about a fortnight; still I endeavored and told him all about the letters I answered in the most recent edition and how I was considering maybe writing my own novel when I had the time (which would hopefully be soon). When Phil heard that his entire demeanor brightened.

“Y/N that’s amazing! You’re going to be a great author!” Phil knew that as long as I can remember I wanted to be a writer so that I was actually pursuing publishing of my own novel was a huge leap of faith for me, I had always done practice pieces, but none that I was entirely happy with so I never did anything with them except keep them on my computer for a later day. For me to consciously set out to write something that was going to –hopefully – be published one day, was kind of terrifying but I knew if my doubts got too over-whelming that I could trust Phil to bring me back to my faith in myself. Judging by the look of absolute support beaming from Phil at the current moment I knew this to be true. “Do you know what you’re going to write about?” Phil leaned in towards me in excitement rather than because of the hum of noise surrounding us in our bubble.

“I’m not a 100% sure yet; I’ve got a few ideas banging around in my head, it’s just about picking one of them.” I bit my lip realizing that I actually had to pick one of the many ideas I actually really liked at the moment, they varied in all kinds of genres… horror, contemporary, fantasy and supernatural; but I didn’t know which one I liked the most, or rather which one I thought would be good to write as a first novel. “But maybe I can tell you my ideas and you can help me?” my voice tilted up towards the end in a question, unsure if Phil actually would.

“Yeah of course!” Phil exclaimed happily as our food was placed in front of us. Conversation slowed down to quiet murmurs about the food and little other things. The food was amazing as usual and I had to show Phil how could it actually was and it seemed that Phil agreed as we both ended up feeding each other our meals and eating the other half for ourselves. There was a point where we just looked at each other and broke into giggles at how ridiculous we looked feeding each other like toddlers. Phil leaned forwards and kissed the corner of my mouth to catch some food and I felt warmth flood into my cheeks. I held Phil’s hand across the table and ran my thumb over the back of it, back and forth.

we finished our meals still feeding each other like people completely infatuated with each other. Later when we had finished our food we collected our check, had a quick wrestle over who would pay the check and then went to get dessert. We walked the streets of London, Phil leading the way as I still had no idea where we’re going. But eventually we came to Phil’s favorite ice-cream shop and we both ordered cones, I personally went for mint chocolate chip and Phil had chocolate swirl. We sat together on the supplied tables and chairs and had our ice-cream until Phil decided to dip his finger in ice-cream and wipe in on my cheeky with an impish grin. This naturally started an all out war between us two, to the point where we were both sticky, covered in ice-cream and in tears from laughing so hard.

“Truce! TRUCE!” I called out waving my hands frantically. Phil was rocking back in his seat giggling and nodded his compliance and we finished our ice-creams… well, what was left of them. After that Phil and I walked home after an amazing night out, I was completely content, I felt like I never wanted this night to end, but sadly it had to come to a close; I sadly came to this conclusion when we both came to my front door. I turned to say goodnight to Phil and thank him for the great night but was stopped by his lips on mine. It took me a second to register what was happening but I quickly got over that and kissed him back, stretching up to wrap my arms around his neck and pull him in closer to me. His arms cam to rest on my waist and we pulled apart grinning. “Goodnight Y/N.” Phil kissed me one last time before pulling away.

“Goodnight Phil,” I said and he walked back home and I went upstairs to go to bed.

And that concludes my first date with Phil.

#date night #phil lester #amazingphil #phil #amazingphil fanfic #amazingphil fanfiction #phil lester fiction #phil lester fanfiction #SGG writes

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