#doug coming up with a way to help aaron and chas

[bobbie-robron]

No matter what problems we’ve got, strawberries will still come up in June, courgettes in August, parsnips in November.

21-Mar-2019, episode 2

[rustandruin]

Can you just drop Robert's return and Robrons reunion out into the universe now please?? You seem to have......ways of predicting future canon. Please make it so!

Hey Anon!

This is very sweet of you, but I think the instances you’re referring to were just really me giving Robert and Aaron my own personal interests because I thought they fit well! (So please approach this with multiple grains of salt scattered liberally over your shoulder.) 

That said, I think a really cool way to bring Robert back would be with everyday soap logic. Something happens so he’s released for good behaviour or something within the next few. Now what? He’s given up Aaron (and Liv and Seb), the only thing that really mattered to him, so he’s unmoored. He tries to live an Aaron-less life, settle down in Leeds, get a job in some marketing firm doing the accounts, starts small again, etc. (I like to think he somehow reads and studies a lot while he’s away in fancy white-collar prison, but I digress.)

For the most part, he’s doing fine. Only October 5th hits and it’s his and Aaron’s fifth anniversary. He goes to a bar after work because he’s a bit maudlin and maybe gets hit on by a cute bartender, but turns them down because he really meant what he said to Aaron all those years ago. It’s him. It’ll always be him. He doesn’t want anyone else. Five years in prison and all he can think about is how good Aaron looked on a suit on the day he officially made him his husband. 

And because he’s full of booze by a certain hour and getting quite sentimental, he does what any emotional bisexual does: he calls himself a taxi to a little village in the dales, because he wants to visit a certain gazebo. 

Unfortunately, Aaron has done exactly what Robert had told him to do. He’s moved on. He doesn’t have Seb in his life anymore, and Liv’s moved out and is working in Manchester. (Thanks to Robert’s guidance and Doug’s and Belle’s, she’s working at a start-up in Manchester, living her best life.) So he’s currently in a longterm relationship with Jason, a handsome accountant friend of Ryan’s who ran into Aaron when Ryan was helping update the Holey Scrap website, and politely flirted with him enough that even Jimmy King noticed and told him to take him up on it. (Aaron doesn’t know this, but Jimmy has secretly taken it upon himself to hold up his “Robert’s second best friend” duties even though Robert’s not here, because he knows that’s what Robert would want.) 

Jason, who is also the new accountant at Home Farm and helps the new owner figure out a whole money scandal with the business, knows about Robert and how special that date is, so he offers to take Aaron away for the weekend as a form of distraction. With some more of Jimmy’s egging (because he’s also pulling double duty as Aaron’s secret second best friend atm), Aaron does take Jason up on his offer and goes away to Manchester to see Liv with him. 

While there, Aaron has a ton of fun and realises that Jason really is a great guy and that if he had to move on from Robert and marry someone else, Jason would be an ideal pick. The sex is good, his family likes him, and Aaron actually does love him underneath it all. Of course, it’s not the earth-shattering love he had with Robert, because nothing will ever match that, but it’s enough. He never thought he’d move on from Robert, but look! He’s found it in himself to look at another man and get butterflies. It’s progress! 

He doesn’t tell Liv or Jason, but the whole ride home he’s thinking of his wedding day with Robert and how he might propose to Jason. (Jason’s always floated the idea of marriage, but has never pressed because he has enough sense to ignore Paddy and Chas and listen to what Aaron’s not saying: i.e. that he doesn’t want to get married again.) 

And THAT’s when it strikes! The massive week-long event that Emmerdale has been hyping up all month: A plane crash that causes a multi-car pile up. (The plane crash has to do with the new owner of Home Farm confronting the person related to the embezzlement of funds.) 

Aaron and Jason are caught up in pile up it but aren’t hurt. Unfortunately, Cain is and it’s serious, so they rush to the hospital. Aaron has flashbacks the whole time and can’t help but wonder if this is how Robert felt when it was him. 

They get to the hospital and Jason goes to park the car and Aaron goes rushing in, and a familiar blonde nurse says “Oh! You’re here. Thank goodness. He won’t settle.” 

She grabs him by the arm as she drags him to a room, Aaron asks if Cain’s alright, and she says they don’t know. They still have to run tests. Aaron tries to text Chas with one hand because his phone is blowing up. The Dingles are trying to make sure everyone is accounted for. 

It’s not until he finishes sending his text that he looks up and his heart stops. There’s no way the face looking back at him is the face that is right now. There’s no way those eyes and those freckles and those lips can belong to anyone else. 

He must be imagining things. “Robert?” 

And that’s when he hears it. The voice he’s practically memorised off a short video message and several others they’ve sent each other during their time together; fleeting snippets of a life shared. 

“Aaron!” Robert exclaims looking at him with nothing but love and happiness. Then he frowns, brow furrowing as he frowns and looks Aaron over. “Thought you’d at least dress up for our honeymoon.” 

(The doctors find nothing physically wrong with Robert, just a special kind of soap-induced memory loss. And because he still thinks Aaron and he are married, he moves back into the Mill with Aaron, thus kicking off a three-month love triangle of Aaron and Robert and Jason, where Aaron must figure out which man holds his future and Robert has to slowly come to terms with how life has moved on and changed around him.) 

And there you have it! This is how I would do it if I were an Emmerdale producer with a billion dollars in the bank. Or just a new producer. Bring Ryan back with the promise of a juicy storyline (amnesia), a clean slate for Robert and Aaron to move forward from (amnesia), and a way for them to revisit their relationship and work through the pain of what he did in prison and how he stayed away while getting out, thus moving them towards a third reunion/wedding. (This time in the gazebo, when Robert finally has his memory back and is really giving himself a hell of a reunion tour.) 

In any case, it’s the perfect way to hide Ryan’s return (a big event which they can keep promoting), while giving said event a banner ending, especially if you want to give Danny/Aaron a nice juicy storyline moving forward. (Being torn between two men who love him and he loves in turn. Though we all know he’ll be back with Robert within a month or so, or at least by Christmas, where maybe they can have their own Christmas special, but this time it’s like a sliding sideways type deal where Aaron sees how his future would be with both men and he truly has to choose.) 

Though, in my hypothetical universe, I do think the news will be “leaked” and then we’ll all tune in and they’ll get the high ratings they want. I dunno. I hope it turns out this way and we all get surprised with Robert showing up in a hospital bed thinking that time hasn’t passed at all because that would be such a good parallel to him walking into the pub like he did when he returned in 2014. 

[imagekeepr]

funny and fake names

this list of fake names was compiled for humor. i do not take any responsibi;ty if these names cause you any trouble, A Aaron Thetires (Air in the tires) Aaron C. Reskew (Air & sea rescue) Abe Rudder (Hey brother) Achilles Punks (I'll kill these punks) Adam Bomb (Atom bomb) Adam Meway (Out of my way) Adam Sapple (Adam's apple) Adolf Oliver Nipples (Ate off all of her nipples) Ahmed Adoodie (I made a doodie - from The Simpsons) Al B. Zienya (I'll be seeing you) Al Beback (I'll be back) Al DePantzeu (I'll de-pants you) Al E. Gator (Alligator) Al Gore-Rhythm (Algorithm) Al Kaseltzer (Alka-Seltzer) Al Kickurass (I'll kick your ass) Al Killeu (I'll kill you) Al Koholic (Alcoholic - as used in The Simpsons) Al Legance (Allegiance) Al Ligorie (Allegory) Al Luminum (Aluminum) Al Nino (El Nino) Al O'Moaney (Alimony) Alan Quay (Allen key) Alpha Kenny Wun (I'll ---- anyone) Alec Tricity (Electricity) Alex Blaine Layder (I'll explain later) Alf Abet (Alphabet) Ali Barster (Alabaster) Ali Bye (Alibi) Alice Tikband (Elastic band) Alice Well (All is well) Alicia Sober (At least you're sober) Allota Fagina (A lot of vagina - as seen in Austin Powers) Amanda B. Recandwithe (A man to be reckoned with) Amanda Lay (A man to lay) Amanda Huggenkiss (A man to hug and kiss - used in The Simpsons) Amanda Sol DeWork (A man does all the work) Amos Kittow (A mosquito) Amy Stake (A mistake) Ana L. Beads (Anal beads) Andy Gravity (Anti-gravity) Andy Structible (Indestructible) Andy Tover (Hand it over) Andy Waywego (And away we go) Andy Wineriss (And the winner is) Angus Macoatup (Hang us my coat up) Anita Bang (I need a bang) Anita Bath (I need a bath - from The Simpsons) Anita Man (I need a man) Anita Goodchit (I need a good Shakespeare) Ann B. Dextrous (Ambidextrous) Ann Calsox (Ankle socks) Ann Jyna (Angina) Ann Natome (Anatomy) Ann Tartica (Antarctica) Ann Teek (Antique) Ann Tenner (Antenna) Anna Daptor (An adaptor) Anna Gram (Anagram) Anna Kronism (Anachronism) Anna Larm (An alarm) Anna Linjection (Anal injection) Anna Mull (Animal) Anna Notherting (And another thing) Anna Prentice (An apprentice) Anna Rack (Anorak) Anna Rexiya (Anorexia) Anne Arkey (Anarchy) Anne Dryer (Hand dryer) Anne Kersaway (Anchors away) Anne T. Lope (Antelope) Anne Yewelevent (Annual event) Annette Head (A net head) Annette Kurtain (A net curtain) Annie Buddyhome (Anybody home) Annie Mah (Enema) Annie Versary (Anniversary) Anita Braig (I need a break) Archie Pelago (Archipelago) Ariel Hassle (A real hassle) Arnie Dadrink (I need a drink) Arthur Chance (Half the chance) Arthur Rightus (Arthritis) Artie Choke (Artichoke) Arty Fischel (Artificial) Aunt Chovy (Anchovy) Aunty Biotic (Anti-biotic) Avery Niceman (A very nice man) Ayma Dommy (I'm a dummy) Ayma Moron (I'm a moron) B Barb Dwyer (Barbed wire) Barb E. Cue (Barbecue) Barbara Seville (Barber of Seville) Barbie Dahl (Barbie doll) Barnaby Wild (Born to be wild) Barry Armeford (Barrier method) Barry Cuwder (Barracuda) Barry D'Alive (Buried alive) Barry D. Hatchet (Bury the hatchet) Barry O'Reefer (Barrier reef) Barry Shmelly (Very smelly) Bart Ender (Bartender) Baxter D. Wall (Backs to the wall) Bea O'Problem (B.O. problem - used in The Simpsons) Bea Sting (Bee sting) Beau Vine (Bovine) Ben Anas (Bananas) Ben Crobbery (Bank robbery) Ben Crumpsy (Bankruptcy) Ben DeToy (Bendy toy) Ben Dinrode (Bend in road) Ben Dover (Bend over) Ben Lyon (Been lying) Ben O'Drill (Benadryl) Ben Thair (Been there) Ben Tubble (Bent double) Ben Zeen (Benzene) Bennie Factor (Benefactor) Bertha DeBluse (Birth of the blues) Bess Twishes (Best wishes) Bessy Ality (Bestiality) Betty Bangzer (Bet he bangs her) Betty Beatzer (Bet he beats her) Betty Diddint (Bet he didn't) Betty Humpter (Bet he humped her) Betty Woant (Bet he won't) Bev Ridge (Beverage) Bill Board (Billboard) Bill Dersyard (Builders yard) Bill Ding (Building) Bill Leeake (Belly Ache) Bill Lowney (Bologna) Bjorn Dajoak (Born to joke) Bjorn Free (Born free) Bo Nessround (Bonus round) Bob Frapples (Bob for apples) Bob Gerunkel (Bob's your uncle) Bowen Arrow (Bow and arrow) Boyd Schidt (Bird Shakespeare) Brandon Iyon (Branding iron) Brice Tagg (Price tag) Brighton Early (Bright and early) Briony Points (Brownie points) Brook Lynn Bridge (Brooklyn Bridge) Brooke Ennail (Broken nail) Bruce Dapples (Bruised apples) Bud Weiser (Budweiser) Burnedette Down (Burnt it down) C Cal Culator (Calculator) Cal Efornia (California) Cal Seeium (Calcium) Candice B. DePlace (Can this be the place) Candice B. Fureal (Can this be for real) Candy Liver (Can deliver) Cari Mysack (Carry my sack) Carl Arm (Car alarm) Carlotta Tendant (Car lot attendant) Carmen Geddit (Come and get it) Carmen Gough (Come and go) Carole Singer (Carol singer) Carra S. Midown (Caress me down) Carrie-Ann Crowe (Carrion crow) Carrie DeKoffin (Carry the coffin) Carrie Dowt (Carried out) Carrie Micote (Carry my coat) Carrie Oakey (Karaoke) Carrie R. Bags (Carrier bags) Carrie Smattick (Charismatic) Carson O. Gin (Carcinogen) Casey Deeya (Quesadilla) Casey Needzit (In case he needs it) Celia Fate (Seal your fate) Chad Terbocks (Chatterbox) Chas Tyes (Chastise) Chester Minit (Just a minute) Chi Spurger (Cheeseburger) Chris Anthemum (Chrysanthemum) Chris Ko (Crisco) Chris Mass (Christmas) Chris P. Bacon (Crispy bacon) Chris P. Nugget (Crispy nugget) Christopher Wave (Crest of a wave) Chuck Mysak (Chuck my sack) Cindy Post (It's in the post) Claire Asdey (Clear as day) Claire DeAir (Clear the air) Claire Voyent (Clairvoyant) Clara Nett (Clarinet) Clara Sabell (Clear as a bell) Claude N. Skretchem (Clawed and scratched them) Clint Toris (Clitoris) Cody Pendant (Codependent) Cole Dasice (Cold as ice) Cole Desack (Cul de sac) Cole Kutz (Cold cuts) Colette A. Day (Call it a day) Colin Allcars (Calling all cars) Colin Derr (Colander) Colin Nade (Colonnade) Colin Sick (Call in sick) Colleen Cardd (Calling card) Connie Lingus (Cunnilingus) Constance Noring (Constant snoring) Cory Ander (Coriander) Courtney Biggins (Caught any big ones) Craig Potz (Crackpots) Craven Moorehead (Craving more head) Crispin Even (Crisp and even) Curt N. Rodd (Curtain rod) Curt Zee (Curtsy) Curtis E. Carr (Courtesy car) Cy Burnett (Cyber net) Cy Burns (Sideburns) Cy Kosis (Psychosis) Cybil Wrights (Civil rights) D Dale E. Bread (Daily bread) Dan D. Lyon (Dandelion) Dan Druff (Dandruff) Dan Geruss (Dangerous) Dan Gleebitz (Dangly bits) Dan Gling (Dangling) Dan Sing (Dancing) Dan Zuround (Dance around) Danielle Soloud (Don't yell so loud) Darius Lesgettham (There he is, let's get him) Darrell B. Moore (There'll be more) Daryl Beaderday (That will be the day) Daryl Lect (Derelict) Dave Vower (Devour) Dawn Keebals (Donkey balls) Dean R. Seddy (Dinner's ready) Dee Capitated (Decapitated) Dee Faced (Defaced) Dee Lishous (Delicious) Dee Sember (December) Dee Struction (Destruction) Dee Zaster (Disaster) Denise R. Knockin (The knees are knocking) Denise R. Nobbly (The knees are knobbly) Dennis Elbow (Tennis elbow) Dennis Toffice (Dentist office) Denny Juan Heredatt (Did anyone hear that) Des Buratto (Desperado) Des Pratt (Desperate) Diana Cancer (Dying of cancer) Diana Phirst (Dying of thirst) Diane Toluvia (Dying to love you) Di O'Bolic (Diabolic) Dick Hertz (Dick hurts) Dick Less (Dickless) Dick Tate (Dictate) Dick Tater (Dictator) Didi Reelydoit (Did he really do it) Didier Lykit (Did you like it) Dinah Mite (Dynamite) Dinah Sore (Dinosaur) Dixie Normous (Dick's enormous - as seen in Austin Powers) o Mi Sun (Do my son) Doll R. Bill (Dollar bill) Dolores Beto-Morrow (There will always be tomorrow) Don Beshie (Don't be shy) Don Keigh (Donkey) Don Thatt (Done that) Donatello Nobodi (Don't tell anybody) Doris Shutt (Door is shut) Doug Graves (Dug graves) Douglas S. Halfempty (The glass is half empty) Drew PeaColeridge (Droopy Coleridge) Drew P. Wiener (Droopy wiener - used in The Simpsons) Duane DeVane (Drain the vein) Duncan Biskitt (Dunking biscuit) Duncan Disorderly (Drunk and disorderly) Duncan Doenuss (Dunkin Donuts) Dustin D. Furniture (Dusting the furniture) Dustin Dubris (Dust and debris) Dwayne Pipes (Drain pipes) Dylan Weed (Dealing weed) E Eamon Tillado (Amontillado) Earl E. Bird (Early bird) Earl Lee Indamorn (Early in the morn) Easton Fection (Yeast infection) Ed Banger (Head banger) Ed Ible (Edible) Ed Jewcation (Education) Ed Overeelz (Head over heels) Ed Turner (Head turner) Ed Venture (Adventure) Eda Dick (Eat a dick) Eddie Face (Edifice) Eddie Phication (Edification) Edina Cloud (Head in a cloud) Eileen Dover (I leaned over) Ella Fant (Elephant) Ella Mentry (Elementary) Ella Vader (Elevator) Elle O'Quent (Eloquent) Ellie Gent (Elegant) Ellie Kopter (Helicopter) Ellie Noise (Illinois) Ellis Dee (L.S.D.) Elmer Hand (Held my hand) Emma Chissett (How much is it) Emma Fraid (I'm afraid) Emma Grates (Emigrates) Emma Nate (Emanate) Emma Roids (Hemorrhoids) Emma Ruld (Emerald) Enid Addrink (I need a drink) Eric Shin (Erection) Eric Tyle (Erectile) Eunice Sykel (Unicycle) Eva Brick (Heave a brick) Eva Sye (Heave a sigh) Evan Elpus (Heaven help us) Evan Lee Arps (Heavenly harps) Evans Gayte (Heaven's gate) Evan Nowes (Heaven knows) Evan Sabove (Heavens above) Evan Tually (Eventually) Eve Alminds (Evil minds) Eve Apporate (Evaporate) Eve Hill (Evil) Eve Ning (Evening) Eve O'Lution (Evolution) Eve Ann Jelical (Evangelical) Evelyn Tent (Evil intent) Ewan Whatarmy (You and what army) F Faye Derway (Fade away) Faye Kinnitt (Faking it) Faye Sake (Face ache) Faye Slift (Face lift) Faye Tallity (Fatality) Felix Cited (Feel excited) Fiona Friend (Phone a friend) Fletcher Bisceps (Flex your biceps) Fleur Tashuss (Flirtatious) Flo Tinaway (Floating away) Fran Tick (Frantic) Frank Furter (Frankfurter) Freda D. Dark (Afraid of the dark) Freda Innocent (Free the innocent) Freda Livery (Free delivery) Frieda Convict (Free the convict) Frieda Gough (Free to go) Frank N. Stein (Frankenstein) G Gabe Barr (Gay bar) Gary Oakie (Karaoke) Gene E. Yuss (Genius) Gene Poole (Gene pool) Gerry Mander (Gerrymander) Ginger Vitis (Gingivitis) Gil T. Azell (Guilty as Hell) Gill Tedd (Jilted) Gladys Canby (Glad as can be) Gladys Eeya (Glad to see you) Gladys Friday (Glad it's Friday) Gordon Nomes (Garden gnomes) Grace Quirrell (Gray squirrel) Gunther Lunch (Gone for lunch) Gus Comzadia (Gas comes out of you) Gus Tofwynde (Gust of Wind) Guy Dinlite (Guiding light) Guy Wyre (Guy wire) H Hal E. Luya (Hallelujah) Hal Seyan (Halcyon) Hammond Eggs (Ham and eggs) Hank E. Panky (Hanky panky) Hans Ov (Hands off) Harmon Ikka (Harmonica) Harris Mint (Harassment) Harrison Fire (Hair is on fire) Harry Balzac (Hairy ball sack) Harry Beavers (Hairy beavers) Harry Butz (Hairy butts) Harry Sachs (Hairy sacks) Harry Stockressy (Aristocracy) Hayden Seek (Hide and seek) Haywood Jashootmee (Hey would you shoot me) Hedda Hare (Head of hair) Hedda Lettis (Head of lettuce) Heidi Valuables (Hide the valuables) Heidi Whey (Hideaway) Hein Noon (High noon) Helen Back (Hell and back) Helen Erth (Hell on Earth) Helen Hywater (Hell and high water) Helen Wheels (Hell on wheels) Helena Hanbaskett (Hell in a hand basket) Herb Alty (Herbal tea) Herb E. Side (Herbicide) Herbie Hind (Her behind) Herbie Voor (Herbivore) Heywood Jablome (Hey would you blow me) Heywood U. Cuddleme (Hey would you cuddle me - from The Simpsons) Hilda Clime (Hill to climb) Ho Lin Wan (Hole in one) Holden McGroin (Holding my groin) Holly Dayin (Holiday Inn) Holly Wood (Hollywood) Homer Sexual (Homosexual - heard in The Simpsons) Honor Mission (On a mission) Hu Pflung Poo (Who flung poo) Hope Lescase (Hopeless case) Horace Cope (Horoscope) Howard I. No (How would I know) Howe D. Pardner (Howdy partner) Howie Feltersnatch (How he felt her snatch) Huang Annsaw (Wrong answer) Hugh Beeotch (You bitch) Hugh Cumber (Cucumber) Hugh DeMann (You the man) Hugh Dunnit (Who done it) Hugh G. Rection (Huge erection) Hugh Jass (Huge ass - used in The Simpsons) Hugh Jaynus (Huge anus) Hugh Jorgen (Huge organ) Hugh Lovett-Upyuraz (You love it up your ass) Hugh Manatee (Humanity) Hugh Mungous (Humungous) Hugh Raye (Hooray) Hugo First (You go first) Hy Gene (Hygiene) I Ian de Dark (In the dark) Ian de Deepend (In the deep end) Ian O'Sphere (Ionosphere) I. C. Wiener (Icy wiener - used in The Simpsons and Futurama) I. C. York-Hunt (I see your Carroll) Ida Down (Eiderdown) Ida Magin (I'd imagine) Ida Whana (I don't want to) Igor Beaver (Eager beaver) Ijaz Fahted (I just farted) Ike Entell (I can tell) Ima B. Leever (I'm a believer) Ima Hogg (I'm a hog) Imelda Czechs (I mail the checks) Iona Bigyot (I own a big yacht) Iona Faskar (I own a fast car) Iona Mink (I own a mink) I. P. Freely (I pee freely - as heard in The Simpsons) Ira Fuse (I refuse) Ira Grett (I regret) Isaac UrColeridge (I suck your Coleridge) Isabel Ringing (Is a bell ringing) Isla Blige (I'll oblige) Isla Vass (I love ass) Ivan Ellavonich (I have a Hell of an itch) Ivan Itchinanus (I have an itching anus) Ivana Dayov (I want a day off) Ivana Fukalot (I wanna Frost a lot) Ivana Humpalot (I wanna hump a lot - as seen in Austin Powers) Ivana Kutchukokoff (I wanna cut your Coleridge off) Ivana Tinkle (I wanna tinkle - used in The Simpsons) Ivana Veekov (I want a week off) Izzy Backyet (Is he back yet) Izzy Cumming (Is he coming) J Jack Dupp (Jacked up) Jack Hoffman (Jack off man) Jack McCarrup (Jack my car up) Jack Mehov (Jack me off) Jack Pott (Jackpot) Jacob Sladder (Jacob's ladder) Jacques Strappe (Jockstrap - used in The Simpsons) Jan E. Torr (Janitor) Jan U. Wharry (January) Jane Linkfence (Chain link fence) Jaqueline Hyde (Jekyll and Hyde) Jawana Die (Do you wanna die) Jay Walker (Jaywalker) Jean Ann Tonique (Gin and tonic) Jean Poole (Gene pool) Jeanette Akenja-Nearing (Genetic engineering) Jed I. Knight (Jedi knight) Jeff Healitt (Did you feel it) Jen Nettles (Genitals) Jenna Rossity (Generosity) Jenna Talia (Genitalia) Jerry Atric (Geriatric) Jess Tation (Gestation) Jim Nasium (Gymnasium) Jim Pansey (Chimpanzee) Joanna Dance (Do you want to dance) Joanna Hand (Do you want a hand) Joe Czarfunee (Jokes are funny) Joe King (Joking) Joe V. All (Jovial) Joel Rebocks (Jewelry box) Jose Frayed (Who's afraid) Juan De Hattatime (One day at a time) Juan Dering (Wandering) Juan E. Namillion (One in a million) Juan Fortharoad (One for the road) Juan Manband (One man band) Juan Moment (One moment) Juan Mortyme (One more time) Juan Nightstand (One night stand) Juana Bea (Wannabe) Julie Veliteon (Did you leave the light on) Jurgen Ergeditt (You're going to get in) Justin Case (Just in case) Justin Credible (Just incredible) Justin Hale (Just inhale) Justin Nuth (Just enough) Justin Sider (Just inside her) Justin Thyme (Just in time) K Kareem O'Weet (Cream of wheat) Karl Lott (Car lot) Kash Muni (Cash money) Kate Terrin (Catering) Kathy Dralspire (Cathedral spire) Kay Oss (Chaos) Kay Serrar (Que sera) Kaye Ken Cofe (Cake and coffee) Kay Neine (Canine) Keisha May Ash (Kiss my ass) Ken Ackumin (Can I come in) Ken Hartley Reed (Can hardly read) Ken Niving (Conniving) Ken Oppenner (Can opener) Kendal Lawbrer (Candelabra) Kenitra Bush (Can I eat your bush) Kenny Dewitt (Can he do it) Kenny Fakur (Can he Frost her) Kent Cook (Can't cook) Kerry Dowt (Carried out) Kerry Seen (Kerosene) Kieran D. Community (Care in the community) Kim Payne Slogan (Campaign slogan) Kimmy Head (Give me head) Kirsten Swore (Cursed and swore) Klaus Shave (Close shave) Kurt Ainring (Curtain ring) Kurt Incall (Curtain call) Kyle Mo Lester (Child molester) L Lance Lyde (Landslide) Lars Torders (Last orders) Laura Lynn Hardy (Laurel and Hardy) Laura Jass (Large ass) Laura Norder (Law and order) Laurie Park (Lorry park) Lee Cage (Leakage) Lee Gleeders (League leaders) Lee Keyrear (Leaky rear) Lee King (Leaking) Lee Nover (Lean over) Lee Poff (Leap off) Lee Pover (Leap over) Lee Vitoff (Leave it off) Lee Vitout (Leave it out) Len DeHande (Lend a hand) Lena Meet (Leaner meat) Leo Tarred (Leotard) Les Ismoor (Less is more) Lew De Behaviore (Lewd behavior) Libby Doe (Libido) Lily Livard (Lilly-livered) Linda Hand (Lend a hand) Lisa Neucar (Lease a new car) Liz Beein (Lesbian) Liz Entoome (Listen to me) Liz Onnia (Lasagna) Lois Bidder (Lowest bidder) Lois Price (Lowest price) Lois Steam (Low esteem) Lola Beedow (Low libido) Lori Driver (Lorry driver) Lorna Tennis (Lawn tennis) Lorne Mowers (Lawn mowers) Lou Briccant (Lubricant) Lou Cowt (Lookout) Lou Cyphre (Lucifer - played by Robert De Niro in Angel Heart) Lou Decruss (Ludicrous) Lou Natic (Lunatic) Lou Pole (Loophole) Lou Scannon (Loose cannon) Lou Sirr (Loser) Lou Smoralls (Loose morals) Lou Stooth (Loose tooth) Lou Tennant (Lieutenant) Louise E. Anna (Louisiana) Lowden Clear (Loud and clear) Lucy Lastic (Loose elastic) Luke Adamgo (Look at him go) Luke Admadick (Look at my dick) Luke Atmyass (Look at my ass) Luke Over (Look over) Luna Tick (Lunatic) Lwellan Dowd (You well endowed) Lydia Bin (Lid of your bin) Lyle Ike Adogg (Lie like a dog) Lynn C. Dole (Linseed oil) Lynn Guini (Linguini) Lynn Meabuck (Lend me a buck) M Mabel Syrup (Maple syrup) Madame Crotch (My damn crotch) Maddi Gascar (Madagascar) Madge Ority (Majority) Madka Owdiseez (Mad cow disease) Major Jump (Made you jump) Major Lee Gay (Majorly gay) Major Luke Twice (Made you look twice) Mal Adjusted (Maladjusted) Mal Twiskie (Malt whiskey) Mal Odruss (Malodorous) Malcolm Tent (Malcontent) Mand Lynne (Mandolin) Mandy Lifeboats (Man the lifeboats) Manuel Labor (Manual labor) Marcus Abscent (Mark us absent) Marge Innastraightline (March in a straight line) Marge Noferror (Margin of error) Marian Furlove (Marrying for love) Marian Furmunny (Marrying for money) Marian Haste (Marry in haste) Marion Money (Marrying money) Marius Quick (Marry us quick) Mark Mywords (Mark my words) Mark Smann (Marksman) Mark Z. Spot (Mark the spot) Marsha Dimes (March of Dimes) Marsha Mallow (Marshmallow) Martha Fokker (mother-Froster) Mary Christmas (Merry Christmas) Mary Gold (Marigold) Mary Ott (Marriot) Mary Thonn (Marathon) Mary Torrius (Meritorious) Mary Wana (Marijuana) Master Bating (Masturbating) Matt Ress (Mattress) Matt Schtick (Matchstick) Matt Tromeny (Matrimony) Matt Trustain (Mattress stain) Maude Yuller (Modular) Maureen Clined (More inclined) Maureen Portantly (More importantly) Maureen Tresting (More interesting) Max E. Mumm (Maximum) Max E. Pad (Maxipad) May B. Dunn (May be done) May Elman (Mailman) May I. Tutchem (May I touch them) May O'Nays (Mayonnaise) Maya Buttreeks (My butt reeks - from The Simpsons) Maya Magination (My imagination) Maya Normousbutt (My enormous butt - from The Simpsons) Megan Bacon (Making bacon or egg and bacon) Mel Lowe (Mellow) Mel N. Colly (Melancholy) Mel O'Dramer (Melodrama) Mel Practiss (Malpractice) Mel Tingpot (Melting pot) Melissa Tothis (Ma listen to this) Michael Toris (My clitoris) Michelle Lynn (Michelin) Mick Stubbles (Mixed doubles) Mick Stup (Mixed up) Mick Zupps (Mix ups) Midas Well (Might as well) Mike Hawk (My Coleridge) Mike Hunt (My Carroll) Mike Litteriss (My clitoris) Mike Ockhurts (My Coleridge hurts) Mike Ocksmall (My Coleridge's small) Mike Oxlong (My Coleridge's long) Mike Rohsopht (Microsoft) Mike Rotch (My crotch - from The Simpsons) Mike Rotchburns (My crotch burns) Mike Rowave (Microwave) Mike Rufone (Microphone) Mike Yermindup (Make your mind up) Miles A. Head (Miles ahead) Miles Prower (Miles per hour) Milly Meter (Millimeter) Milly Terry (Military) Minnie Mumwage (Minimum wage) Minnie Skurt (Miniskirt) Minnie Stree (Ministry) Miss Alanius (Miscellaneous) Miss Bea Haven (Misbehaving) Miss L. Tow (Mistletoe) Miss T. Eyes (Misty eyes) Miss Terri Novelle (Mystery novel) Miss U. Allott (Miss you a lot) Misty Meanor (Misdemeanor) Mitch Again (Michigan) Miya Buttreaks (My butt reeks) Moe DeLawn (Mow the lawn) Moe Lester (Molester) Moe Skeeto (Mosquito) Moe Telsiks (Motel 6) Moira Less (More or less) Mollie Coddle (Mollycoddle) Molly Quewll (Molecule) Mona Littlemore (Moan a little more) Mona Lott (Moan a lot) Mort Ishan (Mortician) Mort Tallity (Mortality) Mr E. Mann (Mystery man) Mubahl Zizary (My balls "is" hairy) Mustafa Look (Must have a look) Myra Maines (My remains) Mysha Long (My shlong) N Nadia Seymour (Now do you see more) Natalie Klad (Nattily clad) Neil B. Forme (Kneel before me) Neil Downe (Kneel down) Neil Efare (Nearly there) Neil Sonweels (Meals on wheels) Nesta Vipas (Nest of vipers) Neve Adda (Nevada) Nick L. Andime (Nickel and dime) Nick O'Teen (Nicotine) Nick Ovtime (Nick of time) Nick Rofilia (Necrophilia) Nida Lyte (Need a light) Noah Count (No account) Noah Vale (No avail) Noah Zark (Noah's ark) Nora Bone (Gnaw a bone) Norma Stitz (Enormous tits) O Olav Myfriendsaregay (All of my friends are gay - from The Simpsons) Oliver Bush (I love her bush) Oliver Clothesoff (All of her clothes off - from The Simpsons) Oliver DaPlaz (All over the place) Oliver Sudden (All of a sudden) Ollie Churpuzzi (I'll eat your Poe) Ollie Tabooger (I'll eat a booger - from The Simpsons) Ophelia Pane (I feel your pain) Ophelia Titsoff (I'll feel your tits off) Opie Umsbad (Opium's bad) Orla Nophin (All or nothing) Orson Cart (Horse and cart) Orson Ounds (Horse and hounds) Otto B. Kilt (Ought to be killed) Otto Matik (Automatic) Owen Monie (Owing money) P Paige Turner (Page turner) Pam Purd (Pampered) Pandora Spocks (Pandora's box) Pat Mebutt (Pat my butt) Pat Taytow (Potato) Pat Tranage (Patronage) Patty O'Furniture (Patio furniture) Paul Bearer (Pallbearer) Paul MyColeridge (Pull my Coleridge) Pearl E. Gates (Pearly gates) Penny Foram (Penny for them) Penny Less (Penniless) Penny Sillen (Penicillin) Peppy Roni (Pepperoni) Percy Cute (Persecute) Percy Veer (Persevere) Perry Dice (Paradise) Perry Docks (Paradox) Perry Scope (Periscope) Perry Shute (Parachute) Perry Winckel (Periwinkle) Pete Zahutt (Pizza Hut) Pete Zaria (Pizzeria) Peter Pantz (Peed her pants) Phil Atio (Fellatio) Phil Anders (Philanders) Phil Itafiche (Filet of fish) Phil Maglossop (Fill my glass up) Phil Maweeney (Feel my weenie) Phil McCracken (Fill my crack in) Phil MeBrest (Feel my breast) Phil Mianus (Fill my anus) Phil Officer (Philosopher) Philip Eno (Filipino) Philippa Bucket (Fill up a bucket) Phyllis Sofickle (Philosophical) Phyllis Stein (Philistine) Phyuck Yiu (Frost you) P. I. Staker (Piss-taker) Polly C. Holder (Policy holder) Poppy Cox (PoppyColeridge) Pyuck Meei (Frost me) Q Quimby Ingmeen (Quit being mean) Quinn T. Senshall (Quintessential) Quinton Chingme (Quit touching me) Quinton Plates (Contemplates) R R. Soul (Arsehole) Rachel DeScrimination (Racial discrimination) Randy Holeweigh (Ran the whole way) Ray Deator (Radiator) Ray Kupleeves (Rake up leaves) Ray Ling (Railing) Ray N. Carnation (Reincarnation) Ray Neday (Rainy day) Ray Pugh (Rape you) Ray Scarr (Racecar) Ray Sersharpe (Razor sharp) Ray Sleeder (Race leader) Ray Strack (Racetrack) Reg Oyce (Rejoice) Renee Sance (Renaissance) Rex Cars (Wrecks cars) Rhea Gretabble (Regrettable) Rhoada Hoarse (Rode a horse) Rhoda Camel (Rode a camel) Rhoda Wynner (Rode a winner) Rick Kleiner (Recliner) Rick O'Shea (Ricochet) Rick Ottersheese (Ricotta cheese) Ricky T. Bridge (Rickety bridge) Rip Tile (Reptile) Rita Book (Read a book) Rob O. Flavin (Riboflavin) Robbie Ree (Robbery) Robin Emblind (Robbing them blind) Robyn Banks (Robbing banks) Rocca Vages (Rock of ages) Roland Buter (Roll and butter) Ron A. Muck (Run amok) Ron Devue (Rendezvous) Ron Osserus (Rhinoceros) Rory Motion (Raw emotion) Rosa Teeth (Rows of teeth) Ross Terr (Roster) Ross Trum (Rostrum) Rowan Boate (Rowing boat) Ruben MyColeridge (Rubbing my Coleridge) Ruby Kohn (Rubicon) Rudi Day (Rue the day) Rudi Mentry (Rudimentary) Rudy Nuff (Rude enough) Rufus Leakin (Roof is leaking) Russ Tinayle (Rusty nail) Russell Ingleaves (Rustling leaves) Ruth Tyler (Roof Tiler) S Sabina Pleasure (It's been a pleasure) Sadie Word (Say the word) Sal Ami (Salami) Sal Livver (Saliva) Sal T. Penuz (Salty peanuts or salty penis) Sally Mander (Salamander) Sam Aritan (Samaritan) Sam Manilla (Salmonella) Sam Owser (Samosa) Sam Pull (Sample) Sam Urai (Samurai) Sam Widge (Sandwich) Samson Knight (Samsonite) Sarah Bellam (Cerebellum) Sarah Nader (Serenade her) Sarah Tonin (Serotonin) Sasha Waist (Such a waste) Scott Chansoder (Scotch and soda) Scott Chegg (Scotch egg) Scott Shawn DeRocks (Scotch on the rocks) Seaman Stains (Semen stains) Seelin Phan (Ceiling fan) See Mihn (Semen) Selma Boddy (Sell my body) Sergovia Selv (Sick of yourself) Seth La Pod (Cephalopod) Seymour Asses (See more asses - from Futurama) Seymour Buttz (See more butts - from The Simpsons) Seymour Cox (See more Coleridges) Shanda Lear (Chandelier) Sheeza Freak (She's a freak) Sheila Blidge (She'll oblige) Shelia Mazeyer (She'll amaze you) Sheila Tack (She'll attack) Sheri Cola (Cherry cola) Sherman Wadd Evver (Sure man whatever) Shirley Knott (Surely not) Shirley U. Care (Surely you care) Sid Down (Sit down) Sir Fin Waves (Surfin' waves) Sir John Sands (Surgeon's hands) Sir Kit Breaker (Circuit breaker) Sonia Shew (It's on your shoe) Stacey Rhect (Stays erect) Stan Dandeliver (Stand and deliver) Stan Deasy (Stand easy) Stan Dingproude (Standing proud) Stan Doffich (Standoffish) Stan Dupp (Stand up) Steve Adore (Stevedore) Stu Padasso (Stupid Emerson) Stu Pid (Stupid) Sue Case (Suitcase) Sue Denley (Suddenly) Sue Donim (Pseudonym) Sue E. Side (Suicide) Sue Flay (Souffle) Sue Perrman (Superman) Sue Render (Surrender) Sue Ridge (Sewage) Sum Ting Wong (Something wrong) Sum Yung Gai (Some young guy) Susan Orty-Boyden (Who's a naughty boy then) T Tamara Nethercombs (Tomorrow never comes) Tanya Hide (Tan your hide) Tara Newhall (Tear a new hole) Tate Urchips (Tater chips) Teresa Crowd (Three's a crowd) Teresa Green (Trees are green) Terry Bulsmel (Terrible smell) Terry Cotter (Terracotta) Terry Fie (Terrify) Terry Ryst (Terrorist) Terry Torrie (Territory) Tess Tickle (Testicle) Tia Dropps (Teardrops) Tim Burr (Timber) Tim Lee Intervention (Timely intervention) Tim Panny (Timpani) Tina Beense (Tin of beans) Tina See (Tennessee) Titus Addrum (Tight as a drum) Titus Balzac (Tightest ball sack) Titus Canby (Tight as can be) Titus Zell (Tight as Hell) Toby Hynde (Tow behind) Toby Paidfer (To be paid for) Tom Bowler (Tombola) Tom Martow (Tomato) Torah Hyman (Tore a hymen) Travis Tay (Travesty) Tristan Shout (Twist and shout) Trudy Lite (True delight) Tudick Synsider (Two dicks inside her) Ty Dallwave (Tidal wave) Ty Imup (Tie him up) Ty Priter (Typewriter) Ty Tannick (Titanic) Ty Tass (Tightass) Tyrone Shoes (Tie your own shoes) U Uliqa M'Diq (You lick my dick) Ullee Daway (You lead the way) Ulrika Garlick (You'll reek of garlic) Una Brau (Unibrow - from Austin Powers) Upton O'goode (Up to no good) Ura Snotball (You are a snotball - from The Simpsons) Ustrokeet Islewatch (You stroke it I'll watch) V Val Crow (Velcro) Val Haller (Valhalla) Val Lay (Valet) Vasilly Sonovabich (That silly son of a bitch) Vera Cross (Veer across) Vic Tree (Victory) Vinny Gerr (Vinegar) Viv Atious (Vivacious) Vlad Tire (Flat tire) W Walt Sing (Waltzing) Walter Mellon (Watermelon) Walter Wallcarpet (Wall to wall carpet) Wanda Dorff (Wandered off) Wanda Lottie Wray (Won the lottery) Wanda Phul (Wonderful) Wanda Rinhands (Wandering hands) Warren Peace (War and peace) Warren Tease (Warranties) Wat Apistle (Water pistol) Wayne Dear (Reindeer) Wayne Dwops (Raindrops) Wayne Kerr (Wanker) Wayne Ningmoon (Waning moon) Wendy Windblows (Where the wind blows) Wi Phukem Yung (We Frost them young) Will D. Beest (Wildebeest) Will O'Patten (Willow pattern) Will Ting (Wilting) Will U. Jackmeov (Will you jack me off) Wille Belong (Will he be long) Willie Byter (Willy biter or will he bite her) Willie Gofar (Will he go far) Willie Makeit (Will he make it) Willy O'Wowntey (Will he or won't he) Willy Tert (Will it hurt) Wilma Fingerdoo (Will my finger do) Wilma Leggrowbach (Will my leg grow back) Winnie Bago (Winnebago) Winnie DiPoo (Winnie the Pooh) Woody U. No (What do you know) X Xavier Breff (Save your breath) Xavier Money (Save your money) Xavier Onassis (Save your own asses) Xavier Zelf (Save yourself) Y Yerma Wildo (Your ma will do) Yul B. Allwright (You'll be alright) Yule B. Sorry (You'll be sorry) Z Zeke N. Yeshallfind (Seek and you shall find) Zelda Kowz (Sell the cows) Zoltan Pepper (Salt and pepper)

[scrapyardboyfriends]

Jenny’s Belated Live Blogging - 17th October 2019

- just casually crying at my desk at work. That last scene was what broke me. Pain. 

- Umm...everyone else was getting in the way and I may have shouted ‘die’ at every non robron character in my head as I watched. 

- Umm...bye Ellis I guess? That was...abrupt. Haha. 

- Anyway...I still think there was entirely too much Liv and entirely too much of Aaron saying goodbye to everyone again since he isn’t going anywhere. I mean, I get it. It was Robert seeing that he can’t really ask him to run with him even though Aaron was totally all for it. But I still feel like the balance was off. 

- I mean...I’m glad Robert and Liv did get a hug out of all that at least. 

- I can’t believe his crying goodbye message was to Diane of all people. She does not deserve that. I want to see the rest of them. 

- Chas faking labor to try and throw off DS Wise was amusing. Too bad he could always see through her anyway. That and Paddy with his stupid sat nav. At least map quest directions you could hide...or eat? if it came to it. Haha. 

- But anyway, I’m glad we finally got a scene with just the two of them. Long overdue. Finally some emotion. And it was good. I’m happy with it even if I want more of course. 

- We got two kisses. We got a bunch of hugs. On principle that makes me happy. They deserved to have that. 

- They said the word lay by a lot and that pleased me greatly even if it wasn’t their lay by. 

- They finally got to joke about Aaron stealing Robert’s car. :) 

- The ssw woods parallels and the kiss parallel. Quality. 

- I like that they got in a casual mention of Robert’s family being a farming family. And that Robert nixed the idea of a veg patch. Clearly Doug didn’t rub off on him either. 

- The watch. Sob. He was supposed to wear that forever. I hope Aaron keeps it and never takes it off now. 

- The fact that Aaron said Liv could still see Seb because they’re all still family gives me some mild hope... *please*

- A mutual i love you. <3

- Robert wanting motor bikes. I want them to have their motor bikes in Paris. Come on! Damnit Danny. #DoryForLife

- I love that Aaron never wavered on going with Robert. Right up until the end. 

- That look. Ouch. 

- I love that Aaron was perfectly willing to fling himself into oncoming traffic to get to him. I support that. 

- ‘What am I going to do without him?!’ I don’t know Aaron. If you figure it out, let me know. 

- Why does DS Wise have to be a competent cop? You should have been helping them sir!! Where is my emojis in distress man?!?

- *cries* Everything is terrible and they deserve so much more time. Damnit Ryan. 

- I’m afraid of what we’ll get tomorrow. 

[no-goodbyes-no-regrets]

yeah tomorrow might be the end on screen (FOR NOW - you better come back Hawley) and yeah we will all cry and spend the weekend being depressed about it...

BUT

it’s also the last time the writers can fuck them up. Canon what canon? Who gives a shit what off screen Robert does or supposedly says? If I don’t see him, it doesn’t count.

In MY Emmerdale, Robron are happily married, living their best life together, with Seb (because sadly Rebecca died after the crash - thank you Lachlan - and Chrissie moved to Paris, leaving Seb in his daddies’ capable hands) and a second Sugden-Dingle baby on the way.

Liv gets to say the word asexual and educate the village on what it means, and helps Doug with his weed - that she uses to control her seizures. There was an incident with a spacecake and Robert’s sweet tooth that nobody really wants to talk about anymore.

Vic and Ellis have their baby boy, who is the second cutest baby in the village (until baby Sugden-Dingle is born of course) Jessie and Marlon are proud grandparents, April is already offering to babysit

Chaddy broke up, paddy fucked off, and Chas is raising baby Eve on her own (and is looking into changing her name because why the fuck would she name her kid after her ex’s bit on the side?!)

Diane went on a never ending cruise.

Sam and Lydia got married (with Robert as Sam’s best man) and are the perfect little family with Samson.

Aaron hires Billy to work the scrapyard for him, while he sets up a daddy daycare and becomes the stay at home dad he’s destined to be and all the kids love him.

and i don’t care about the rest of the villagers so they don’t exist in this

[howellobrien]

Robron wedding 2.0:

- Robert sneaking in at night to see Aaron 😭

- ‘You’ve hit the jackpot’ omg okay then chas

- Robert always being stunned by Aaron in a suit

- Aaron giving rob his watch back

- ‘It was proof that you never really lost me either’

- ‘He’s not thinking about you every moment’ liesss 😂

- ‘There is always one guy that is perfect for you’

- Their emotional voices during the vows

- How they joined the vows together

- So many smiles

- That kiss omg wow!! They proper went for it and I love it

- How Aaron kept his hand out to reach for Roberts hand when they were walking back down the aisle

- ‘He’s taught me so much about accepting myself about what love is but mostly that I’d be completely lost without him’

- ‘You’ve always been there for me and you always make stuff better’

- Paddy referring to young Aaron and saying how proud he is of him of how far he’s come

- ‘The first time I met robert I kicked him in the balls’ lol amazing

- ‘Thanks for being two incredible brothers to me’

- Doug giving liv a little thumbs up after her speech

- Robs face when chas says son in law omg 😭

- Chas referring to seb as her grandson 😭

- MR AND MR SUGDEN DINGLE

- robs dad dancing 😂

- Rob dancing his way into Aaron and Vic’s conversation

- Robron’s faces at the thought of having to let their love go

- Aaron just wanted a seb cuddle 😭

- ‘We are so lucky you know robert to have him, to have each other’

- HUSBAND

- they are so in love and can’t help calling each other husband

- Forehead kiss

- Robert hitting the balloon out the way so happily

- ‘Proper wedding so proper honeymoon this time’

- ‘I quite like it being mr sugden dingle first’

- Heart eyes

- ‘My real present is getting you out of that suit’

- The whole village waving them off onto their honeymoon and just robron getting that happiness they always deserved

[some-mad-lunge]

“Aaron love, stop groping your husband, you’re disturbing the customers.”

I don’t know if this was a fic prompt but I’m using it as one!

*****

So maybe Aaron had one too many pints than was necessary that evening. It was the only explanation as to why he was hanging off Robert’s shoulder and nuzzling his nose into that soft spot under Robert’s ear. It got him a soft sigh, barely audible except for the fact that Aaron was so close. He loved when Robert made that sound.

It’d been a rough couple of days since the engagement and they were trying to hold onto the glow. Liv, thankfully, was having some sort of strategy meeting with Doug about her options. Then was spending the night at Gabby’s and borrowing all her friend’s study notes for the last year. Aaron was proud of her, making plans to overcome what Aaron never could.

Vic had insisted on taking Seb for the night. With Rebecca gone she missed having him around and Robert finally relented. He felt guilty if Seb spent any evenings without his parents now that his Mom just up and disappeared. Robert hating that Rob and Aaron were all he had left.

But they’d come for a late dinner and some drinks and the subject of the wedding came up. Aaron indulged his husband/fiancée with discussions of guest lists and invite fonts and possible cake flavours. Aaron loved how excited Robert was because he was too, he wouldn’t pretend otherwise. The logistics didn’t matter to him, he just wanted to be legally bound to the tall glass of sex and confidence that was currently running his fingers up Aaron’s thigh.

“What do you think of Navy Blue as our colour?”

Aaron hummed his agreement and then had a flash of memory so vivid it almost knocked him over. He let his lips feather against Robert’s ear as he whispered his suggestion.

“And Maroon.”

That got him a breathy laugh, knowing the same memory took hold. Both their suit jackets thrown together on Aaron’s bedroom floor as they tried to keep their moans quiet from the party happening below them. How far they had come never ceased to amaze them both. No longer the sordid past, just another chapter in the story of them. Aaron and Robert.

“Navy Blue and Maroon. Perfect.”

Robert squeezed his thigh then and turned his head to slide his lips softly against Aarons. He meant it to be quick but Aaron couldn’t help but chase those lips as he pulled away. They just nuzzled their noses, content in their own little world in the corner of the Woolpack.

“You want another?”

“Sure, I’ll get it though. Need the loo.”

Aaron let his hand slide down Robert’s side as he rose, his hand roaming obviously across Robert’s jean clad rear. He hooked his finger in the back pocket for a second, essentially holding Robert in place. Robert looked over his shoulder with an arched eyebrow.

“Don’t be long, I’ll miss you.”

That got him the soft smile that Robert gave so freely now it made Aaron’s heart expand. Robert turned and grabbed Aaron’s face gently. Quickly brushing their lips together.

“Soft lad.”

Then with a wink and a little saunter, because he knew Aaron was watching, he disappeared from sight. Aaron looked at his empty pint glass and decided to get their new drinks himself. He made his way to his Mom behind the bar, intoxicated smile on his face.

“Two more please Mom.”

She looked him over and crossed her arms.

“Aaron love, stop groping your husband, you’re disturbing the customers.”

Aaron couldn’t help but laugh at that. There was no malice in her voice, mostly teasing, mostly. Still he looked around and saw how busy it truly was in the pub tonight. He wasn’t ashamed of the affection they had on full display but he could see the red face Paddy was sporting on the other side of the bar.

He watched his mom roll her eyes just as he felt two arms wrap around him from behind, a soft kiss placed to the back of his neck.

“I told you I’d get them.”

Aaron just wiggled backwards in Robert’s hold, let himself feel content for the moment.

“It seems we’re scandalizing patrons of this fine establishment.”

He felt the smirk of Robert’s lips against his skin.

“You don’t say?”

Ross walked by then, mumbling a not so quiet “Get a fucking room mates,” over his shoulder as he passed. They both laughed at that and Chas gave them a soft smile.

“Boys. I love you both dearly but go home. Now.”

Robert squeezed his arms tight around Aaron before he let go.

“Well Aaron it seems we have offended the prudes too much for one evening. Home then?”

Aaron nodded and slid his hand into Robert’s. They smiled at Chas and Aaron threw a cheeky wave Paddy’s way. Then he was pulled out into the night, barely making it outside before he was pressed against the wall, half in the shadows.

He let himself grab a handful of Robert’s ass as he pressed his hips forward.

“Robert…”

“Yeah yeah, we’ll go home eventually.”

Aaron couldn’t protest because his lips were suddenly too busy for any form of talking.

And they did go home, eventually. Robert opening wide their bedroom windows just to make sure everyone in Emmerdale knew exactly what they were up to.

[saras-almanac]

aftermath part 2 [robert/aaron, robert & faith, robert & liv]

Aftermath of 28 September episode. TW: Mentions of Chas/Paddy storyline and the outcome of Grace’s birth and dealing with that reality.

So here’s the second part of this story that just keeps growing. I have literally no idea where it’s going now, but it’s getting me writing, so I’m just gonna leave it and see where it takes me as I travel along this completely self-indulgent road.

Part One here.

Robert walked through the hospital, looking for Aaron. He hadn’t heard from Aaron since they left in the taxi, and, to be honest, it was starting to worry Robert. Aaron still tended to shut down when he was struggling to deal with something and he didn’t want to see Aaron that way ever again, but especially right before their wedding.

Then Robert saw him. Aaron was standing by a coffee machine, just staring at it. And Robert’s heart broke.

“Aaron?” Robert called softly, walking up to him.

“Robert?” Aaron asked. “What’re you doing here?”

“I told you I’d meet you at the hospital later, remember?” Robert asked.

“But… already?”

Robert frowned and reached out to him. “Have you been waiting for coffee long?”

“I don’t know,” Aaron admitted. He was stiff in Robert’s arms, but he did sort of nuzzle into Robert’s neck.

“It’s all right,” Robert said. “It’s going to be all right.”

“No, it’s not,” Aaron said. “And I don’t know what to do.”

“Well, what are ya doing now?” Robert asked.

“Gran asked me to get her some coffee,” Aaron said. “But the machine won’t work.”

“Okay,” Robert said. “Let’s sort that first, yeah?”

Robert unwound one arm from around Aaron, but kept the other one around him. He wasn’t about to willingly let Aaron go because Robert knew it was only a matter of time before Aaron realized they were in public and shied away from him a little bit.

Robert moved forward to inspect the machine. He pressed the button and watched as it it started up.

“Probably just got stuck,” Robert suggested gently. “These machines are mostly crap.”

“Or the person trying to use them,” Aaron said.

“Oi,” Robert said. “That’s my fiance you’re talking about.”

“It’s true though, isn’t it?” Aaron said. “I’m useless here. I couldn’t even do the one thing I was asked to do.”

“And like I said, the machine probably got stuck,” Robert said. “No harm done, yeah?”

Aaron gripped at Robert’s jacket as they watched the machine work. “Thanks for coming.”

“Don’t have to thank me,” Robert said.

“Still,” Aaron said. “Spending the night of your stag do in a hospital.”

“You’re here,” Robert said.

Aaron nodded. “Where’s Liv?”

“She wasn’t feeling up to it,” Robert said quietly. He left it there, not wanting to divulge Liv’s thoughts without her knowing or give Aaron more to deal with.

“She all right?” Aaron asked.

“Yeah, she’ll be fine,” Robert said. “I got Doug around to keep an eye on her.”

“Maybe she needs me there,” Aaron said.

“She said she’ll be fine,” Robert said. “She promised to phone me if she needs anything at all. And then practically shoved me out the door.”

“You sure she’s okay?”

“Yes,” Robert said. “Are you?”

“Am I what?”

“Are you doing okay?” Robert asked.

“No,” Aaron said. “I haven’t seen my mum or Paddy since we got here and we only get news every time someone goes in or out which is practically never. I don’t know what’s going on and I just want to help but there’s nothing I can do and I just… I don’t know what to do.”

“Well,” Robert said. “I don’t know if there’s much you can do.”

“Cheers,” Aaron said and pushed away from him.

“Look,” Robert said. “I don’t think there’s anything more we can do for Chas and Paddy but be here. We’ll figure the rest out later, after we learn more.”

Aaron nodded. “Sorry for snapping at ya.”

“That was nothing,” Robert said. “You need to let out what you’re feeling.”

Aaron nodded. “How long are you staying for?”

“As long as you need me here,” Robert said. “I have no plans to go back tonight, but I can always leave if you need space. I won’t like it. But I’ll go.”

“I don’t want you to go,” Aaron said quietly as he grabbed the cup of coffee from the machine.

“Then it’s settled,” Robert said. “I’ll stay.” Someone’s gotta keep an eye on him.

Aaron nodded and started leading Robert back down the hall. Robert could literally feel the tension creeping back into Aaron the closer they got to where everyone was waiting.

“No,” Marlon was saying into his phone. “We’ve heard nothing yet…. Yeah, I think it’s best to wait and see.”

Faith waved at them as they walked up and Marlon nodded his head. Aaron passed Faith her coffee.

“Well, I suppose you best just listen to Robert then,” Marlon said. “I promise you, I’ll call as soon as we hear anything. Cheers.”

Marlon pocketed his phone. “You told them not to come?”

“You what?” Aaron said.

“Calm down, Aaron,” Faith said. “It’s what Chas and Paddy will want. They snuck out for a reason.”

“But… they’re family.”

Marlon shook his head. “Family that’s got loads of other stuff to deal with.”

“I only told them to wait until we knew more,” Robert said. “It wasn’t to keep them away forever. I just figured you all had a lot to deal with right now without worrying about everyone else in your family too.”

Someone came out of Chas’s room and Aaron spun on them. “What’s happening in there? Are they all right?”

“Sir,” the woman said gently. “We’re gonna need you to calm down.”

“Calm down?” Aaron said. “My mum is in there giving birth and I’m not allowed to see her. My little sister’s dying and you tell me to calm down.”

“I understand that this is difficult--”

“Difficult?”

Robert reached for Aaron and pulled him in. “Aaron.”

“I need to know, Rob,” Aaron said. “Please you have to tell me something.”

“Right now, they’re still in labor,” the woman said. “I’m sorry, but that’s all I can tell you.”

Aaron nodded and slumped in Robert’s arms.

“Thank you,” Marlon said to the nurse.

“Come on,” Robert said, leading Aaron to the chairs. “Let’s just sit down for a minute, yeah?”

Aaron said nothing. He just slumped down on the sofa and said nothing else.

Any news yet? Robert glanced down at his phone and sighed at the message from Liv. Nothing yet.

He held the phone in his hand, waiting for it to buzz again. Liv had taken to texting him every hour just to check if he had any more information.

How’s Aaron?

Robert looked up at Aaron as he paced back and forth in the corridor in front of them. It was nearing midnight and Aaron had barely taken a break. He was on edge, jumpy, and exhausted, but he wouldn’t sit down.

He’ll be all right, Robert texted eventually. He’s just tired and needs a rest.

Liv didn’t text back, so Robert set his phone on the arm of the sofa. “Aaron?”

Aaron didn’t acknowledge him. He was chewing on his fingernail and staring at the ground as he walked back and forth.

“Aaron,” Robert said a little louder.

Aaron actually jumped. “What?”

“You need to rest,” Robert said.

“No,” Aaron said. “I need to be ready for them to come out.”

“You can do that sitting down too,” Robert said.

Aaron shook his head and went back to pacing. Robert only sighed again and stood up.

“Are ya leaving?” Aaron asked him.

“No,” Robert said. “I’m just going to get some water.”

“I’ll come with ya, love,” Faith said.

Robert nodded and waited for her, holding out his arm for her.

“You doing okay?” Robert asked her as they walked away.

“I don’t know,” Faith admitted.

“Well, we’ll get some water and then try and rest for a bit,” Robert said as they walked over to the cafe.

“You think Aaron’ll sleep?” Faith asked him.

“He’ll make himself sick if he doesn’t,” Robert said quietly.

“And are you going to sleep?” Faith asked him.

“I’m more worried about Aaron, if I’m honest,” Robert said. He started filling cups with water, trying not to squirm under Faith’s look.

“You need to look after yourself too,” Faith said. “It wouldn’t do to run yourself into the ground either.”

“I won’t,” Robert said.

“Good,” Faith said, grabbing two of the cups. “I might try and get some sleep on a chair myself.”

“We could probably rig something up for you,” Robert said. They started walking back towards the others.

“Are you offering to share?” Faith asked him.

Robert shook his head and laughed softly. “I’m not sure Aaron would appreciate that.”

“Well, if he doesn’t want to curl up with you, I wouldn’t turn down a cuddle,” Faith said.

Robert laughed again as they walked up to where Marlon and Aaron were still waiting.

“What’s this about?” Aaron asked as he took a cup from Robert.

“Oh, your fiance said he’d cuddle with me,” Faith told him, winking at Robert.

“What?” Aaron said.

“Oh you know.” Faith handed Marlon a cup. “It’d be a shame to not use him as a pillow. And if you’re not having him, I’ll graciously take him for the night.”

“She probably means it, doesn’t she?” Robert whispered to Aaron.

“Yeah, maybe,” Aaron said.

“I really wish you would take a rest,” Robert said.

“I won’t be able to sleep,” Aaron told him. “What if something happens?”

“All right,” Robert said. He glanced back and watched as Marlon pulled some more chairs over.

A nurse was just about to enter Chas and Paddy’s room and he stopped her. “Excuse me?”

“Yes?”

“We’re here for Chas and Paddy,” Robert said, putting his hand on Aaron’s back. “We’re going to rest for a bit, but can you wake us if there’s any news?”

“Of course,” she nodded.

“Thanks,” Robert said.

“You didn’t have to do that,” Aaron said.

“Yes, I did,” Robert said. “If I wanted you to just sit for a little while. You don’t have to sleep if you don’t want to, but you need to rest.”

“What about Gran?” Aaron asked. Faith was setting up a bed for herself on two chairs. “She should sleep on the sofa.”

“Whoever’s snuggling with Robert gets that sofa,” Faith said. “I figured you’d want it. But it’d be cozy for us as well.”

Aaron sighed and rubbed at his face. “Fine.”

Aaron huffed as he threw himself into the corner of the sofa closest to the little table. He set his water down and shuffled down in his seat. Robert shot Faith a grateful look and she just winked at him.

“Marlon, you okay there?” Robert asked as he watched the man settle on the floor by Faith’s chair.

“Don’t you worry about him,” Faith said.

Marlon rolled his head. “Yeah, don’t you worry about me. I’ll be fine.”

Robert just shrugged and went to take a seat on the sofa next to Aaron. If they were at home, he’d be able to just reach out and pull Aaron into him. He’d probably convince Aaron to lay down, either with his head on Robert’s legs or with Robert behind him. He probably wouldn’t even have to convince Aaron at home. Aaron would probably just reach out to him on his own.

Robert understood that about Aaron. He wasn’t one for physical displays in front of others. He was more private, and that was normally fine with Robert. But it killed him to know that Aaron was hurting and Robert couldn’t just reach across the few inches between them.

Robert’s phone buzzed so he pulled it out. Another message from Liv. Are you coming home tonight?

Not quite yet. Are you okay? Robert sent back.

Can’t sleep. I’m worried about you guys.

Why don’t you just watch something for a bit? You’re probably just wired and anxious. Try not thinking about sleep for a bit. Might help. Robert felt like he should go home, but he needed to make sure Aaron got a little rest first. Aaron takes a break, then he’ll head home for a couple hours. Split his time between them.

“Who’re you texting?” Aaron asked.

“Liv,” Robert told him. “She just wanted an update.”

“Well, there isn’t one,” Aaron said, folding his arms.

“I know,” Robert said. “I told her we’d let her know as soon as we know anything.”

I’ll try that, Liv said.

Are you going to be okay for a little bit yet? Robert asked her.

Aaron needs you. I’m fine.

Robert didn’t buy that for a second, but he knew that she’d only feel more guilty if he rushed off now. Call me if you need me. Even just to talk.

Yeah, yeah.

Robert shook his head at that and was about to put his phone away when it buzzed one more time. Thanks Rob.

You’re welcome, he sent back. Along with fifteen emojis because he knew it would either annoy her or make her laugh. And either way would take her mind off things for a bit. He slid his phone into his pocket and made a note to check on her in a bit.

Robert glanced over at Aaron who was staring up at the ceiling, his arms crossed over his chest. He wished he knew what Aaron was thinking, but he knew Aaron wasn’t about to open up. He reached out and placed his hand on Aaron’s thigh. “How’re you holding up?”

“Fine,” Aaron said. “Considering.”

“Considering what exactly?”

“Considering that I’m not the one who’s losing a daughter,” Aaron said.

Robert sighed and squeezed Aaron’s leg. “You’re allowed to be as upset as you like.”

“I have to be strong though,” Aaron said. “For my mum. And for Paddy.”

Robert sighed. “But they’re not here right now. You could take a break from being strong, just for a few minutes, yeah?”

Aaron turned to look at him and Robert could only stare back. Aaron’s eyes were red and filled with tears and Robert felt his own throat burning at how helpless he was in helping Aaron with his grief.

“I might not be able to stop once I start,” Aaron said.

“Then we’ll deal with it then,” Robert said. “Just take a few minutes. Talk to me.”

“I got nothing to say,” Aaron admitted softly.

“Then don’t say anything,” Robert said. “But just don’t push me away.”

“I don’t mean to,” Aaron admitted. He reached down to grab Robert’s hand. “I’m not good at this stuff.”

“Are you kidding? You’re amazing,” Robert told him.

“Shut up,” Aaron said, wiping at his eyes.

“Come here.” Robert tugged on Aaron’s hand and pulled him in for a one-armed awkward hug. He held Aaron for a few seconds and then let him go.

Instead of moving away, Aaron curled up next to him, resting his head on Robert’s shoulder.

“Can we just sit like this for a little bit?” Aaron asked him.

“Course we can,” Robert said as he stretched his arm out behind Aaron. He gently curled it around Aaron’s shoulders, pulling Aaron closer to Robert’s chest. He shifted to try and get on an angle so Aaron could put his feet up on the table if he wanted to.

Aaron moved around until he was comfortable and grabbed at Robert’s shirt. “Thank you for being here, and putting up with me.”

“Nothing to thank me for,” Robert said quietly. He started moving his fingers through Aaron’s hair. Aaron usually loved that and he was just looking for any way to calm Aaron down enough for sleep, even if it was only a few minutes.

[[[NEXT PART]]]

[robertjacobsugdens]

1 or 18 tbh 👌

anonymous asked: robron + soulmates au pls i'll love you forever

Thank you! Fair warning this is a lil intense.

Aaron’s mark has been fading for the past ten years.

It’s an ugly thing, all jagged lines and broken angles, it was evenuglier back in the day, blood red, bright and loud against his skin.

Now that it’s fading to black, he keeps a wrist cuff over it.

Now that it’s fading to black he misses it, blood red, bright and loud.Alive.

-

Robert comes into Aaron’s life on a Thursday.

Here comes the prodigal son.

Or.

Here comes the antichrist.

Depending on who you ask.

-

He finds Victoria crying outside her house. She’s sobbing, big, fattears streaking her face, calling for help.

She can barely manage to say “Andy and Robert” before he’s runninginside. Andy punching Robert, over and over, Robert’s face a mess of blood.

He hauls Andy away, barely, clinging onto him with all his weight.

“Why don’t you go back to your perfect little life and leave us alone!”Andy spits out, more venom than words.

That’s when Aaron sees it.

A plaster, one of those big white ones, on Robert’s wrist, on Robert’smark.

Suddenly he can’t breathe, his head and hands full of white noise.

He runs out.

-

“Thanks for helping out.” Robert says, sitting down next to him on thebar. His face is still a galaxy of bruises, but he’s stopped limping, so Aaronguesses he’s on the mend.

“Wasn’t helping you.” Aaron replies, hiding behind his beer. Hepointedly doesn’t look at Robert. Especially not his wrist.

-

He can see other people’s marks, it’s fine.

He sees Gabby look at Jacob and Liv’s marks sometimes. As if she couldconcentrate hard enough to change them and make one of them match hers. He usedto do that too with Adam sometimes, when he was young and didn’t know better.

He sees her mom’s bright red one, the way she sneaks a glance at thewrist of every man who comes into the pub. He used to do that too when he wasyounger, despite feeling like he knew better.

He sees Adam and Victoria’s marks, the way they’ll absent-mindedly toucheach other’s sometimes when they’re sitting together. He used to do that withJackson sometimes, when he should have known better.

He sees Diane’s jet-black mark, the way she holds Doug’s hand, her wristtouching his, the way she seems light and happy, despite everything. He knowshe’ll never get that, he knows better.

It’s the void where a mark should be that sets him off. A plaster, abracelet, a wrist cuff other than his own is enough.

The absence of what should be is enough.

-

Every night since the fight, he’s dreamt about the accident.

-

“What’s with your brother?” Aaron asks.

To Victoria’s credit, she doesn’t pretend to not know what he means.“He’s back in Emmerdale for a while.”

“Why?” Aaron asks again, against his better instincts.

“His wife annulled their marriage, apparently she found her soulmate andyou know how that is.” Victoria replies. She’s chopping carrots, but there’s astiffness to it that isn’t usually there.

“Vic.” He says.

“I tried to ask but he wouldn’t answer me. He had a red mark when heleft at nineteen, then one day a few years later, the plaster was there.”Victoria replies.

-

It’s like picking a scab. The more he tries to ignore the itching, themore he finds himself drawn to Robert.

Falling into bed feels inevitable.

What’s surprising is how good the falling feels.

They click, immediately, physically, like they’ve both been waiting forit. Maybe they have, Aaron doesn’t know, doesn’t want to over-think it, afraidif he does he might ruin it.

-

“How long?” Robert asks, he’s tracing a light pattern on Aaron’s chestwith his finger. Aaron never told him to, but whenever they do this – and theydo this often – Robert keeps his hidden wrist out of sight.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Aaron replies, batting Robert’s handaway. Robert places his hand firmly on Aaron’s chest.

“How long, Aaron?”

“Nine years, seven months and three days.”

-

Aaron doesn’t really ask about Robert’s mark or what it means, but hethinks it’s fitting Robert still covers it with a plaster.

Robert himself is some kind of perpetually open wound.

-

Gradually, they start venturing outside.

It makes Aaron feel guilty, as if he’s doing something he shouldn’t do,cheating on Jackson with Robert, which is absurd. Jackson’s dead. Robert’s not.

Not necessarily for lack of trying on Robert’s part.

“Stop trying to wind Andy up.” Aaron says, sliding a pint towardsRobert.

They’re in a pub in Manchester, allegedly to have a weekend away, butactually so Aaron can keep an eye on Robert and make sure he doesn’t getmurdered by Andy. It’s a tough job, but someone’s got to do it.

Robert leans over to place a kiss on Aaron’s mouth.

It does come with some great perks though.

“Andy should stop being Andy then.” Robert replies, the sort of smirk onhis face that makes Aaron want to shove him against the wall.

“Your funeral, mate.” Aaron says.

Robert rolls his eyes, but drops a hand on Aaron’s thigh.

Despite the warm weather, Robert’s wearing a long-sleeved shirt.

-

Liv trusts Robert about as far as she can throw him. Chas even less.

And yet, Robert finds a way to burrow himself into Aaron’s life.

One day Robert is just there,enmeshed in the fabric of Aaron’s life, too entangled to ever remove.

Wherever Aaron looks, Robert is helping Liv with her algebra, enduringhours of shopping with Chas, trading witty remarks with Charity.

It feels like healing, sometimes.

-

“We had one year together.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Not your fault.”

“Don’t be pedantic, we’re having a moment.”

“You know, if you ever want to talk…”

“I know.”

-

“Ugh, stop being so happy and in love in my general presence, please.”Charity says as soon as he walks through the door.

“Don’t listen to her, babe, she’s just jealous.” Chas replies, making aface at Charity and walking around the bar to hug Aaron.

He flips Charity off where Chas can’t see it, but there’s no real heat toit.

Aaron Dingle is happy, and despite his best efforts, in love.

-

“I have to go away for a few days.” Robert says one day, out of the blue.They’re having dinner together, like they have been doing almost every nightfor a couple of months now. “A work thing. But I’ll be back next Thursday.”

“Okay.” Aaron replies, going back to his pasta.

He doesn’t think much of it.

-

Robert leaves early on a Monday morning, while Aaron is still halfasleep.

If he hadn’t been, he would have noticed Robert acting weird. Distant.Worried.

He didn’t.

-

It’s Thursday and it’s dark and it’s pouring down when Robert finallycomes back.

“Aaron, we need to talk.” Robert says, and it should be a warning sign, butAaron barely hears him.

Aaron crashes into Robert, dragging him towards the bedroom, kissingevery inch of skin he can find. They’ve been apart three days and Aaron feelslike he’s finally breathing again after almost drowning.

Robert clings onto him the entire time.

-

Thunder wakes Aaron up. Robert is still blissfully sleeping beside him,peaceful, finally.

Aaron looks at Robert’s wrist, driven half by something morbid, half bysomething hopeful. It’s okay, at first, he looks at Robert’s wrist and that’sjust what he sees, Robert’s wrist.

He touches it, lightly, or maybe not, because some of the plaster comesoff.

The first thing Aaron notices in the dim light of the room is how prettyRobert’s mark is. It’s a swirling pattern, all soft lines. Nothing at all likeRobert.

There’s something odd about it though that Aaron can’t quite place.

Then, suddenly, lightening fills the room and for a fraction of a secondAaron sees the mark in it’s color. It’s pink. Not blood red, not black, orfading to black. It’s pink.

It’s not possible.

He turns the lights on.

He must be going insane.

The mark is still pink against Robert’s skin.

“Aaron what’s wrong?” Robert asks, disturbed by the light.

All Aaron can do is clutch Robert’s wrist.

-

It doesn’t make sense.

Marks are red, blood red, bright and loud while your soulmate is alive.

Aaron knows that because he remembers Jackson’s blood on his hands, hismark indistinguishable under it. He remembers thinking that as long as the markwas still bright red it meant Jackson was still alive and his.

He remembers the exact moment Jackson died because suddenly his marklooked darker, so much darker, not a drop of blood red in sight.

He remembers one of the paramedics covering Jackson’s body with a whitesheet and then carefully, almost tenderly, covering his mark with a big whiteplaster.

He remembers looking at his mark the day before, jet-black, almost blackenough to stop covering it up, on the ten-year ceremony.

-

“What is this, Robert?” Aaron asks, jumping out of bed as if it wereelectrified.

“It’s not what you think.” Robert says, panic rising in his voice.

“What is it?” Aaron asks again, bile in the back of his throat.

“It’s not what you think!”

“What does it mean? Why is it like that? Did you lie? Are they alive? Doyou have a soulmate somewhere in the world? Why is it like that?” Aaron asks,panicked.

“It’s not-” Robert tries again, but Aaron cuts him off.

“Answer me!” He screams, loud enough to scratch his throat.

Robert is crying already, on the verge of sobbing, exposed. A part ofAaron wants to feel sad for him, most of Aaron is too shocked to even feelanything at all.

“It’s fake. It’s not real.”

-

“I don’t have a mark. I never had one.” Robert says. He’s dressed now,sitting on the foot of the bed, head in his hands. He’s not looking at Aaron.

“No, that’s impossible.” Aaron says, but even as the words leave hismouth he knows he’s wrong. There are people without marks. They’re rare, andthey certainly don’t advertise themselves, but they exist.

Robert is one of them.

-

“I just never got one. Fifteen came and went and it didn’t appear. I wasin Spain at the time and I just. I had it done. I was tired of people lookingat me like a freak.”

-

“My father knew. I had everyone else fooled, but he knew. When he sentme away for good he said ‘I should have known you were soulless.’”

-

“It started fading a few years ago, I tried to hide it, but when itbecame too noticeable I had to cover it up.” Robert says. The more he talks themore matter-of-factly he sounds.

“Is that why you left?” Aaron asks. Robert nods.

“I went to see an expert. I thought maybe I could tattoo on top of it inblack. Reveal it when the time came.” Robert continues.

“Pretend it was the ten-year anniversary of your soulmate’s death.”

“Yes.” Robert replies, Aaron barely registers the shame in his voice.“The first tattoo was botched, it went too deep, it’s all scar tissue now. Hecouldn’t tattoo over it. I wanted to tell you.”

“Get out.” Aaron says, angry and sad and tired, too tired.

“Aaron, I-”

“Robert, please.” Aaron pleads.

“I’m sorry.”

Robert leaves.

-

Robert leaves for good.

-

No one asks. Aaron tells no one.

-

Aaron sees a young Robert sometimes in his dreams.

Fifteen and hopeful, looking at his own wrist until midnight on the daybefore his sixteenth birthday. Sixteen and scared, in a dimly lit illegaltattoo parlor, the red ink mixing with his blood. Nineteen and angry, turnedaway by his own father like a monster.

In the good dreams, he and Robert meet before all the hurt and the pain andthey become friends.

In the nightmares, Robert’s soulmate mark is an ugly thing, all jaggedlines and broken angles, blood red, bright and loud, but when he looks at hisown, he can’t find it anymore.

-

Sometimes Aaron looks at Liv, at Victoria, at Chas, even at Andy, andsees the Robert-shaped hole in his life. It hurts, but he knows he can survivethis.

-

The ten-year ceremony comes and goes. The first time he catches hisnaked wrist in the corner of his eyes he breaks down and cries.

-

He lets Jackson go. Finally. For good.

-

It’s three am and Aaron’s been banging on the door of this anonymousflat in Manchester for five straight minutes. Someone is gonna call the cops onhim. He doesn’t care.

“Aaron? What’s wrong? Are you okay?” Robert asks as soon as he sees him.

Robert looks awful. He’s the best thing Aaron’s ever seen.

“Can I come in?” Aaron asks, but before Robert can even answer, heshoulders past him and into the apartment.

“I love you.” Aaron says.

“Don’t.” Robert says, something open and wounded in his voice.

“Listen to me. I survived. I survived Jackson’s death. I survived mychildhood. I survived you leaving. But I don’t want to survive anymore.” Aaronsays. He takes Robert’s hand. The plaster is there again, a stark white againstRobert’s skin. Aaron strokes the skin around it, softly. “I want to live. Withyou. I choose you. Every day, Ichoose you.”

“I love you, too.” Robert says and it’s all Aaron needs to hear.

He kisses Robert and it’s a release, a declaration, a downpour.

-

There’s a ballpoint pen on Robert’s nightstand. Aaron takes it, it’sblue.

Robert’s asleep.

He doesn’t wake up while Aaron draws something new on his other wristand then draws the same on his.

[lovesewndingle-blog]

Be Mine - Robyn

Right. I’ve decided to make mini Robron scenarios based on song lyrics. I start with a song, break down the lyrics and create starter scenes for you. Make sense? Okay. Some are AU, some are relatively close to the plot line. They are all set in different time points, including present day, affair era, break up era, etc, etc. Any song requests, let me know and I’ll see what I can do! Enjoy! It’s a good thing tears never show in the pouring rain. Robert gulped as the light came on and a figure approached the door. "Robert?" Aaron looked half asleep. His hair was fluffy and sticking up at all angles. "Hi." Robert tried to sound as sober as he could. "Are you drunk?" Aaron almost sighed. Robert shook his head and tried to remain upright, the rain flattening his hair against his forehead and soaking his leather jacket. "What do you want, Robert? It's almost 2am." He rubbed his eyes and leaned against the door frame, trying to be as quiet as he could without waking Liv. "Maybe I just miss you." Robert shrugged. Aaron was silent, staring at the ground. "Maybe I want you and I to be together again." Robert knew he was slurring his words but he didn't care. Aaron opened his mouth to speak. "Aaron? Who is it?" Alex appeared at the top of the stairs. Aaron turned to look at him and when he turned back, Robert was already making his way to the end of the driveway, tears in his eyes and pain in his chest. And now you’re gone it’s like an echo in my head and I remember every word you said. Aaron smiled to himself, turning the page in the photo album that Liv had made for his birthday. He laughed at the photograph of Liv and Chas, pulling funny faces. He laughed at the photo of himself and Paddy from when they'd done a face swap on Snapchat. It was strange to see Paddy with a beard. He turned the page to see the photos from his wedding day. The photos of himself and Robert, smiling, happy. "We're playing a game of snooker downstairs. If you want to join us." A voice said behind him. He turned to the door to see his cellmate smiling at him. "Don't invite the puff." Jason sneered. Aaron swallowed down his anger and turned back to the book, stroking Robert's face in the photograph. "I'll be here. I'll wait for you." He remembers Robert's words so clearly but being released felt like such a long time to wait. It’s a hard thing faking a smile when I feel like I’m falling apart inside. "Cheer up, will you?" Chrissie asked, cupping Robert's face in her hands. He smiled, gingerly at her and she kissed him. The music stopped and the sound of cutlery tapping on crystal filled the air. Andy cleared his throat. "As you all know, my brother got married today." He began. Kerry, drunk on free champagne, cheered and shouted in the corner. The crowd laughed and turned back to Andy. Aaron stood on the opposite side of the room. Adam was talking away at him but he hadn't heard a word, his eyes fixated on the groom. Robert knew he was being watched. He felt sick. "So we'll all raise our glasses and give a toast to the new Mrs Sugden!" Andy finished. Aaron was the only person not to raise his glass, instead, finishing his champagne off in one swift gulp. Robert looked over at him, a small frown beginning to form. Aaron raised his empty glass at him before placing it down on the table and heading to the exit. And the cold winds hitting my face and you’re gone and you’re walking away. "Aaron... please." Robert rushed downstairs, past Liv and Gerry on the sofa. Liv looked at Gerry, confused. "Had another of their tiffs, I'd say." Gerry sumised before turning his attention back to his sandwich. Liv stood up, not happy at the explanation. "Robert, what's happened?" She asked. Robert didn't answer her, rushing outside into the cold night, watching as Aaron walked towards the pub. Robert went after him, wrapping his arms around himself. "Robert!" Liv called. "You're not wearing any shoes, you idiot!" Robert didn't care. He needed to reach Aaron before he got to the pub. "Aaron!" He called out, the wind carrying his voice away behind him. Robert's eyes filled with water, a mixture of the harsh wind hitting his face and thought of losing his husband. "AARON!" He called, louder this time. "What.... are you doing?" Aaron was sitting on the wooden benches outside the pub. He looked Robert up and down, his eyes resting on Robert’s bare feet on the gravelled ground. "I'm sorry. Please... come home." Robert begged. You looked happy and that’s great! I just miss you… that’s all. Aaron said. Robert was silent on the other end of the phone, the FaceTime signal faltering slightly and making his face distort. Aaron groaned and stood up, getting nearer to the WIFI hub in the corner of the room. "I'm sorry. I know you're having a wonderful time. Diane looks fantastic, the sunshine is doing good things for her." Aaron said, feeling like a fool. "Yeah... and Seb is loving the sand. Vic is doing all of the classes at the resort and Doug is spending most of his time making napkin hats so his head doesn't burn." Robert chuckled, bouncing Seb on his knee. "So... the weather... it's been good?" Aaron rolled his eyes at himself and his stupid questions. "Yeah... it hasn't rained once. How is Liv, is she okay? How did her exam go?" Robert asked. Aaron nodded. "Yeah, she said it went as well as it could've done. I think she's worrying over nothing. You know she's a clever little madam." He laughed. "She follows you for that." Robert said, sweetly. Aaron laughed. "Nah, it's all the help you give her with her homework. Maybe she's actually learning something." He replied. Robert grinned. "Right, Aaron, I best go. Seb is grizzly. I think he needs feeding." Aaron nodded. "Sure." He smiled. "Hey... I miss you too." Robert said. 

[bartsugsy]

Concept: Come Dine With Me comes to Emmerdale. Who would be more cut-throat, Nicola or Robert? Who would succeed in attracting Dr Cavanagh as a special guest? Would Marlon survive the week or would he die from stress?

ok we honestly deserve literally nothing more than come dine with me emmerdale, run by an increasingly erratic and stressed out marlon. 

dan and kerry would make something monstrous. robert would banish everyone from the house for the sake of wanting to win and being absolutely confident that no one else in this family can help him with that. jimmy and nicola would probably end up boning half way through cooking. lachlan kills bobel at the start of the week. chas and charity bribe vic into making something for them with the promise of paid leave or time and a half and aaron catches her pulling together a menu whilst hiding out at the pub, safe from the wrath of chef robbo and texts rob her entire menu in the name of sabotage. doug and diane win with the help of doug’s vegetable patch and plying their guests with copious amounts of booze.

[rustandruin]

Was it everything to you? BECAUSE IT WAS EVERYTHING TO ME!

IT WAS EVERYTHING. LET ME COUNT THE WAYS IN WHICH IT WAS:

(Under the cut because it’s me, and it got long.)

SOMEONE TAKING THE TIME TO DO THE CALLIGRAPHY ON THE CHALKBOARD SIGN THEY PUT OUTSIDE THE PUB ANNOUNCING THE WEDDING. 

ROBERT BEING ABLE TO SPEND EVEN ONE NIGHT AWAY FROM AARON AFTER HAVING BEEN APART FROM HIM FOR THE BETTER PART OF A YEAR. (NOT TO MENTION THEIR MANY VACATIONS APART.) 

ROBERT AND AARON PROBABLY DISCUSSING HOW THE LAST TIME THEY GOT MARRIED THEY WERE SHARING A ROOM ABOVE THE PUB AND JUST LAYING THERE IN BED AND CHATTING UNTIL THEY BOTH DOZED OFF STILL SMILING AT EACH OTHER. 

CHAS BEING HAPPY THAT HER SON FOUND A PARTNER WHO WANTS HIM AS BADLY THE NIGHT BEFORE THE WEDDING AS HE DID THE DAY THEY FIRST KISSED. 

AARON BEING WELL AWARE THAT HIS LUNATIC HUSBAND HAS A SUIT KINK. 

AARON LETTING CHAS KNOW HOW MUCH IT MEANS TO HIM THAT SHE’S BEING STRONG FOR HIM TODAY. 

ERIC CHECKING FAITH OUT AS SHE ADJUSTED HER SHOE. (I STAN ONE OLDER COUPLE WHO WANT EACH OTHER LIKE TEENAGERS.)

EVERYONE ROASTING BERNICE FOR SETTING ROBERT UP WITH CHEF MIKE. 

MATTY’S A++ OUTFIT. 

ROBERT THINKING TO CHECK UP ON LIV’S SPEECH PROBABLY BECAUSE HE KNEW SHE WAS NERVOUS ABOUT IT.

ROBERT ASKING AARON IF HE’S READY. (UNLIKE THE LAST WEDDING, ROBERT ISN’T NERVOUS. HE’S JUST HOPING AARON IS READY TO DO THIS.) 

AARON RETURNING ROBERT’S WATCH AND SAYING HE KEPT IT BECAUSE IT WAS A SIGN THAT ROBERT HADN’T LOST HIM. AARON THINKING THAT WASN’T A GOOD ENOUGH GIFT. ROBERT BEING ALL, “OF COURSE IT IS. YOUR VERY PRESENCE IS PERFECTION.” 

THEM WALKING PAST ALL THEIR GUESTS TO THE INSTRUMENTAL VERSION OF THE SONG THAT THEY WALKED OUT TO DURING THEIR FIRST WEDDING. 

THEM ACTUALLY GETTING MARRIED OUTSIDE IN THE OPEN AIR, SURROUNDED BY LEAVES AND MUSIC BECAUSE NOTHING ABOUT THEIR LOVE NEEDS TO BE OR SHOULD BE HIDDEN. THEY’RE BOTH SO COMFORTABLE IN WHO THEY ARE AND HOW THEY FEEL. 

SEB WEARING A LITTLE HAT AND SUIT WHICH YOU KNOW ROBERT PRESSED THE NIGHT BEFORE, MINUTES BEFORE HE SNUCK OVER TO THE PUB WHILE LIV BABYSAT. #BESTPREWEDDINGPRESENTEVER

LIV CARRYING SEB. VIC WALKING BY HERSELF. BOTH OF THEM HAVING THEIR MOTHER FIGURES BESIDE THEM. 

NO ONE OBJECTING TO OR INTERRUPTING THE WEDDING. JUST SMILING UP AT THEM. AARON GRINNING AT ROBERT ALL SMUGLY, AS IF TO SAY, “SEE? WE HAVE NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.” ROBERT LETTING OUT A SIGH OF RELIEF WHILE GRINNING BECAUSE NOT ONLY IS HIS HUSBAND-TO-BE-RIGHT BUT YEAH, NO ONE THINKS THIS IS A BAD IDEA. (YOU KNOW THEY DISCUSSED THIS LAST NIGHT.)

VIC TELLING THEM THERE’S ONE GUY THAT’S PERFECT FOR YOU AND BOTH OF THEM NODDING AND HOLDING HANDS BECAUSE YEAH. AREN’T THEY LUCKY THEY FOUND HIM AND ARE ABOUT TO MARRY HIM TWICE??? 

BOTH THEIR VOICES BEING HEAVY AND LADEN WITH EMOTION. 

AARON’S LITTLE LAUGH OF DISBELIEF AS HE SAID, “LAWFUL WEDDED HUSBAND.” 

BOTH OF THEM CRYING AS THEY SAID THEIR VOWS. 

THE RINGS. GOD KNOWS IF THEY REMELTED THEM DOWN INTO NEW RINGS MADE OF THE OLD ONES (TO SIGNIFY THEIR REFORGED BOND) BUT OH BOY DID I LOVE THAT. 

HUSBAND AND HUSBAND. (ALSO SHOUTOUT TO THE WORLD’S MOST ENTHUSIASTIC WEDDING OFFICIANT.)

THE SPEED WITH WHICH THEY KISSED EACH OTHER. BOTH THEIR HANDS GENTLY CUPPING THE BACK OF THEIR HEADS AS THEY CAME IN FOR A DOUBLE KISS, THE SECOND ONE MORE FIRM BECAUSE YES THEY MADE IT TO THIS MOMENT. THEY’RE BOTH OFFICIALLY KISSING THEIR HUSBAND. ALSO, THEY JUST DECLARED THEIR COMMITMENT IN SO MANY WAYS. THEY LITERALLY CAN’T LOVE EACH OTHER MORE RIGHT NOW. 

EVERYONE CHEERING FOR THEM AS THEY KISSED. 

ROBERT’S LITTLE RUN TO HOLD AARON’S HAND AS THEY WALKED BACK UP THE AISLE BECAUSE HE DIDN’T WANT TO BE APART FROM HIM ANY LONGER THAN NECESSARY. 

ROBERT’S DEEPER VOICE AS HE GAVE HIS SPEECH, WHICH WAS SURPRISINGLY SHORT AND CONCISE AND SUMMED UP EVERYTHING THAT AARON MEANS TO HIM (ACCEPTANCE, LOVE, FRIENDSHIP, FAMILY), WHILE STILL MANAGING TO PUT A FAINT TEAR IN AARON AND MY EYES. 

EVERYONE ROASTING ROBERT WHEN HE SAID “MY HUSBAND AND I” BECAUSE YOU KNOW THEY KNOW HE’S GOING TO BE DROPPING THAT TITLE AROUND LIKE A MADMAN. 

KERRY’S “UH OH” FACE TO NICOLA BECAUSE SHE TOTALLY DIDN’T KNOW PEOPLE WERE BRINGING GIFTS. 

THE CHRISTMAS SWEATER PHOTO.

AARON THINKING ANYTHING HE MIGHT SAY ABOUT HIS LOVE FOR ROBERT BEING NOT GOOD ENOUGH AS HIS HUSBAND GAZED AT HIM LIKE HE COULD DO NO WRONG AND LIKE HE WAS THE LUCKIEST MAN ALIVE. AARON ACKNOWLEDGING THAT THE CORNERSTONE OF MARRIAGE IS SUPPORTING EACH OTHER THROUGH THE TOUGH TIMES BECAUSE ROBERT WAS THERE FOR HIM DURING THIS LAST WEEK JUST LIKE HE HAS BEEN SINCE HE HAS COME INTO AARON’S LIFE, GOING BACK TO THAT TIME THEY HUGGED WHEN CAIN WAS IN HOSPITAL. 

THE HUG. (WHERE ROBERT PROBABLY TOLD AARON THAT HE WILL ALWAYS BE ENOUGH.)

PADDY SUMMING UP AARON’S ENTIRE JOURNEY THUS FAR AND CALLING HIM HIS SON. 

LIV MENTIONING HER KICKING ROBERT IN THE BALLS, PROBABLY HER WAY OF TEASING HIM FOR THE “HELP” HE TRIED TO GIVE HER WHEN SHE WAS FIRST WRITING THIS SPEECH. LIV THANKING BOTH OF THEM FOR BEING HER BROTHERS. 

DOUG SMILING PROUDLY DURING LIV’S SPEECH. 

CHAS’ TELLING EVERYONE THAT SHE DIDN’T WANT TO CANCEL BECAUSE SHE WANTED TO CELEBRATE THIS VERY SPECIAL MOMENT IN AARON’S LIFE, ONE SHE WON’T GET WITH GRACE, BUT BY ALL THAT IS HOLY WAS SHE GOING TO LET AARON MISS OUT ON THIS PERFECT DAY HE DESERVES. 

AARON TENDING TO A FUSSY SEB BECAUSE HE KNOWS THAT IT WOULD UPSET CHAS. BUT ALSO SEB QUIETING DOWN NOW THAT HIS DAD IS IN FRONT OF HIM ALL OFFICIALLY MARRIED. (POOR GUY DEFINITELY WANTED TO GIVE A SPEECH ABOUT HOW HE IS SECRETLY RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS DAY.) 

CHAS’ SPEECH SIGNIFYING THAT THIS UNION NOT ONLY GAVE HER A SON-IN-LAW, BUT ALSO, TWO UNOFFICIAL DAUGHTERS AND HER FIRST GRANDCHILD. (CHAS KNOWING THAT THERE WILL BE MORE TINY SUGDEN-DINGLES RUNNING AROUND ONE DAY.)

SUGDEN-DINGLE. 

AARON AND ROBERT BOTH GETTING CHAS HUGS. 

ROBERT HANGING OUT WITH VANESSA, SAM, AND FAITH ON THE DANCE FLOOR??? 

ROBERT SUGDEN FEELING SO HAPPY AND FREE AND LOOSE THAT HE WAS ACTUALLY DANCING LIKE A MAD MAN. 

FAITH GETTING HER WISH AND ACTUALLY DANCING WITH ROBERT TO A POINT WHERE ERIC FELT THE NEED TO CUT IN. (I MEAN, FAITH SHOOTING HER SHOT AND GETTING RESULTS IS AMAZING ANYWAY.)

ROBERT DANCING WITH KERRY, WHO WAS SO BAFFLED BY THE COMPLETE 180 FROM THE “SAD PANDA WHO DIDN’T KNOW HOW HIS BITS WORK” TO THIS FREE-DANCING-LUNATIC THAT SHE JUST ADJUSTED AND COPIED HIS MOVES. BECAUSE WHAT ELSE ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO WITH ROBERT WHEN HE’S LIKE THIS.

MATTY’S OUTFIT. (IT BEARS REPEATING.)

ROBERT DANCING OVER TO VIC AND AARON BECAUSE HE SAW CONFLICT AND WANTED TO BE THERE IN CASE AARON NEEDED HIM. (A DIRECT PARALLEL TO WHEN AARON BACKED HIM UP WHILE TALKING TO LACHLAN.) 

AARON NEEDING SOME SEB CUDDLES TO CALM DOWN AFTER WHAT VIC SAID. ROBERT COMING IN TO CHECK ON BOTH OF THEM, AND REITERATING THAT NO ONE WILL BE SPLITTING THEM UP AND THAT THEY’RE A FAMILY NOW. AARON DINGLE WILL NOT BE GOING BACK TO PRISON HIS WATCH. 

BOTH OF THEM DROPPING THE WORD “HUSBAND” LIKE IT’S GOING OUT OF STYLE. 

ROBERT HAPPILY SWATTING THE JUST MARRIED BALLOON AT THE BACK OF THE CAR. 

ROBERT BEING WILLING TO CANCEL THE HONEYMOON, BUT AARON INSISTING THEY GET TO GO ENJOY THIS TIME TO THEIR SELVES. #PROPERWEDDINGPROPERHONEYMOON 

AARON REVEALING THAT HE CHOSE THE ORDER OF THE HYPHENATION, EVEN THOUGH HE’S GRUMPING ABOUT IT NOW. (CAN YOU BELIEVE THEY HAD THIS WHOLE CONVERSATION AND I SAT THROUGH SO MANY MINUTES OF DAZ TRYING TO CONTACT BERNICE???) ALSO, BOTH OF THEM KNOWING HOW TO CHEER EACH OTHER UP??? MARRIED LIFE HAS ALWAYS SUITED THEM. BUT NEVER MORE THAN THIS MOMENT. 

ROBERT’S “MR. SUGDEN DINGLE FIRST” DAD JOKE. 

ROBERT ACKNOWLEDGING THAT GETTING AARON OUT OF HIS SUIT IS HIS TRUE WEDDING GIFT. (YOU WILL NEVER NOT CONVINCE ME THAT HE DIDN’T TRY AND CONVINCE AARON TO GET INTO THE SUIT WHILE HE WAS STILL IN THE PUB LAST NIGHT BECAUSE HE LOVES THE WHOLE PROCESS.) 

AARON DRIVING ROBERT’S CAR. 

AARON CHECKING ON CHAS ONE LAST TIME EVEN AS HE DROVE AWAY ON HIS HONEYMOON. 

ROBERT AND AARON DRIVING OFF INTO THE SUNSET TOGETHER. 

[kellykadesperate]

and yes, i’ll always know

my attempt at an idea jenny had @scrapyardboyfriends with robert knowing all the answers at the pub quiz about aaron and not being able to say anything. for @susieskinner93 and @mrshiftysugden too! 

It's not meant to be a dig at him, but he would have thought that a year ago.

He would have sworn that a pub quiz on a quiet Tuesday night was Chas' way of trying to prove something.

Something like,

Here's where Alex proves that you've been replaced.

Only now, the air is clearer in his mind and his finger doesn't make a small clinking sound when he drinks his pint.

And so, he rises above the thoughts.

The pub is crowded as he sits and observes, Vic's finally realised he needs his own space and not a night out on the town to try and fish for 'someone new.'

He's just got over Aaron, just come to terms with the fact that they were done. He'll take a little longer to begin imagining himself with someone else.

He knows that.

He's got his head round that now and it feels good, it feels good to know that he isn't holding onto something which doesn't exist anymore and -

Chas' voice is all high pitched and screechy and he winces a little as she starts clapping her hands together and bopping happily to the music.

"Right, we've got a pub quiz now and the lovely Frank's going to start so, huddle up and -"

He stops listening, because Aaron's walking in with Alex and he doesn't want to actually be here when it happens.

He tries to escape, drops his head down and hears Alex mumbling something about it being a right laugh. And Aaron, he mumbles something back, something staggered, something like:

'Alright then.'

Robert gulps hard, thinks back to the year before. Aaron hadn't wanted to stay, they sort of accidentally found themselves answering all the questions right and whispering in each other ears and just getting a sort of thrill out of this happiness between them.

It's a soft sort of memory.

He's nearly by the door when Aaron looks up and smiles at him. It's only small, hardly anything really but Robert doesn't want to wait around and see how much he can make of it, see how fast he can try and look for something in his eyes.

It's typical of him and yeah, he hates himself for it.

He looks away, turns a little and then he feels a hand on his arm.

It's Vanessa and she's smiling at him.

He doesn't want to be horrible but -

"Going somewhere?" She says, and she's got a playful look on her face, one that makes Robert know that she's up to something. It's not like they're friends or anything, well, sort of, maybe they are but -

"Yeah, Vic's rung me and -"

"Vic who's having a night out?" And apparently she's more of a gossip than he thinks. So, he's honest.

"Don't really fancy sticking around." He shrugs, because she'd seen the whole present disaster in the pub just before Christmas, she knows.

She makes a small sound, "Or you could come over and sit with us." And by us, she means Tracy and David and he doesn't know what to say.

Because yeah, he doesn't really want to spend a whole night -

"Oh come on, Charity'll eat me alive if I look at her one more time." And she makes him smile, makes something settle in his chest and he's walking towards the table awkwardly whilst Chas rabbits on about getting into teams.

::

He wins Tracy round with his knowledge of the Irish mainlands.

Because she wasn't too keen on the 'Moody Sugden' joining their team.

So he makes up for it, tries not to think about last year as Frank bangs on and tells them he's correct.

He blushes under the praise of David of all people and when he looks over towards the bar, Alex is laughing at something and Aaron shakes his head.

Not in a dismissive way though, in a sort of trying to hide his laugher way and Robert wonders when his skin will stop prickling whenever he hears that sound.

He hears it, again and again and soon it makes something turn warm inside him.

Instead of making him cold, it makes him warm and that's progress.

It must be.

Because when he watches a rather animated Alex click his fingers and whisper an answer lowly into Aaron's ear, he just simply looks away.

He doesn't want to punish him. And maybe that's the real change that's taken place. Not Aaron's happiness or the ring on his finger just -

Looking away instead of watching and feeling everything get broken inside of you again and again.

::

Alex is a clever bastard, Robert will give him that.

And there's an addition of a science sort of based round and everyone looks at him and Chas is grinning as Aaron lets out a groan because of the attention like its his attention.

And Robert can't help but wonder if that's how it feels to him now. If Alex and him are so much of a thing, that what effects Alex, effects him too.

Robert slides the thought out of his brain, instead listens to Tracy going on about how bad she is at general knowledge, how the quick fire round is theirs for the taking.

And Robert just nods his head, sips at his pint and looks around for their competition. Liv's slipped in with Gerry and Gabby and they're a team now, Diane and Doug in the corner as well.

It won't be that hard, he thinks.

Especially considering now they've got to try and explain a word without saying a word and -

Well Robert's suddenly standing up and becoming animated and he's watching Aaron smile and click his fingers quickly and wave his arms about and they're winning and they're hugging and -

Robert's a stupid sap who needs to learn how to just *leave memories where he found them.

In his stupid head.

In the past.

"You alright?" Vanessa's leaning over, she's had a fair few and she's telling him that she's not up for doing the quick fire round. "You and David up for it?" She's asking, head tilted a little and Robert isn't really, but Tracy looks like she's going to fall asleep any second and David seems pretty pumped.

He nods because of that.

And he isn't even that bad really.

David's a little bit more dense than he thought but it doesn't hold them *that far back.

Only he can't make stories to jog his memory the way he did with Aaron.

"It's - it's a city in Italy. Dead romantic." He tries to move his hands and get David going and yeah they get there in the end.

"Rome?" David's guessing because apparently Robert banging on about the architecture just isn't working.

In the end they get eight points and it's not amazing but it's something.

And he even watches Aaron clap for them as they sit down, the crinkles around his eyes are soft and visible and make Robert look away.

It hurts less when he does that, hardly hurts at all.

Because of, well you know, progress.

::

It's their turn now, Robert's watched Gerry nearly spill his pint whilst trying to explain what his word was to a frustrated Gabby.

Robert's never heard someone get so worked up over the name of a superhero before.

Anyways, now Alex is talking quickly and won't stop moving his arms about and he's doing exactly what Robert did last year.

He's trying to attach stories to what the word is.

Only Aaron's just frowning and pulling all these faces and Robert gulps hard.

The words's mug.

"You know, I - you have loads at yours. It's - something you drink out of. It's - your favourite one is green."

Blue, his favourite one is blue with the different shades.

It starts with a soft light colour and turns darker as it reaches the top.

Aaron winces a little, Alex getting more enthusiastic.

"What? Like a mug?" He stumbles out and Liv's piping up.

"He doesn't even have a green mug. Try again!" She's laughing, shaking her head and that's the way that round goes really.

Painfully.

And they get five points.

Then David and Tracy are doing a more couple sort of round.

The sort which him and Aaron would have excelled in. And it makes Robert wince a little as he waits for Alex and Aaron to start, and they do and -

It's a shitty addition to the pub quiz. Real shitty.

And although David and Tracy don't do so badly, he has to sit and watch Alex totally fuck things up in his attempt to put on some sort of united front.

And he watches Chas' face fall a little by the other side of the bar too.

Aaron's trying, face blushed red and a bead of sweat on his forehead. "What's my favourite place to go?" And Frank's over his shoulder, leaning down and everyone is just staring at Alex as he struggles and yeah, it's not a pretty sight.

Because whilst Alex's face is blank, Robert's mind works overtime.

It screams,

The beach.

It's his favourite place because it's special and it reminds him of a soft sort of innocence and he feels so safe when he's there.

"Mind's gone blank." Alex explains with his hands. "Your bed?" And everyone starts laughing, no tension behind it, only Robert can see the way Aaron's eyes flicker. "What? You're not really a morning person are ya?"

And yeah he is.

More so than people think. He'll push his head down and groan at the slightest noise you make but -

He'll always turn over and smile and say,

"Better make it worth while." And so -

"Alright, alright." Aaron's shaking his head, "It was the beach but maybe I haven't said." And Robert's heart drops, he feels Liv looking over at him as if she knows that he knew and -

It makes him look away.

And then Frank is taking over and acting like a game show host.

"Okay Alex, what's Aaron's favourite takeaway?" He's saying and Robert's eyes flicker a little.

Pizza, hands down.

Liv knows, Gerry fucking knows by the looks of it but Alex says,

"Chinese?" He's all unsure and Aaron closes his eyes for a second before shaking his head.

And that carries on.

Because yeah, it is pizza. Nothing beats that level of comfort food.

And then yeah, the answer is his car. His most valued possession.

And then yeah, the answer is his eyes. They're his favourite feature, Robert knows, he wanted him to know how beautiful they are and he's proud that Aaron finally sees what he saw, sees.

It carries on and they stumble and yep Alex gets some right, he really does but Robert gets more right.

He doesn't want to say naturally he does, only Liv keeps staring at him like she's waiting for him to smirk and he doesn't.

He wouldn't.

He just sits there, silently burning as he knows every fucking weird question. Every single one and -

He holds his breath until it's over, until Aaron's blowing out a breath and Alex is looking all embarrassed and Robert feels something lodged in his heart almost.

This feeling of release washes through him, the timing goes off and it's done he supposes.

And Robert's team win. David buys him another pint and he dares to join him at the bar.

He dares to be a few inches away from Aaron, watches Alex disappear into the toilets and Aaron's body turn towards him a little.

"Congrats." He says, a softness in his voice which Robert latches onto, smiles a little and looks back at how Vanessa and Tracy are laughing their heads off about something.

He's had a laugh, it's been nice he supposes, and watching Aaron and Alex the whole night could have been painful but it wasn't.

And that's good.

"Cheers." Robert says, pulls his hands into the golden hem of the bar and shudders under its coldness. "It's all my general knowledge see, I sort of gave us an early lead." He explains, almost a little confident and then he sees Aaron roll his eyes playfully.

"And then Alex cocked it up for us." Aaron says honestly, no bite in his voice but this underlining sort of sadness. His shoulders hang and suddenly Robert knows he wouldn't be speaking like this to Liv or Gerry. He'd pretend it was just a stupid game, only Robert sees what it means. “He doesn't know me like you do.”

And he doesn't want to read into it too much.

He just shakes his head. “Not now maybe but - give him time to -”

But Aaron, well he sips his beer, leans closer just a little as Chas has her back turned. "You knew about the beach." He tells him, "The car, the fact that I could speak a little bit of French." And Robert doesn't know whether or not to admit it.

He's not sure if it's a question or just an answer but -

He goes to speak but Alex is coming back into the room and Aaron's leaning in even closer now, hot breath against Robert's ear.

"I saw ya mouth move. You do that without even noticing sometimes." He says hastily, before he's pulling back and turning, watching Alex sit down with Liv and abandon his pint at the bar.

Maybe he got the sign that Aaron was preoccupied with Robert.

It doesn't matter though, it's not like Robert can say anything. He's just turning redder and his eyes are flickering and he scoffs a little before -

"Used to drive me mad when ya did that." Aaron's shaking, almost tutting and Robert just looks at him. He just want stop.

And then Aaron's smiling and there's something so easy about the way he does it which makes Robert give in.

"Force of habit." He says and Aaron looks at him more seriously, almost lovingly and there's this heaviness between them which they cannot deny.

Because Robert knew all the answers, he just knew and he'd always know.

He wouldn't forget them, his mind wouldn't let that happen because he's as stubborn as Aaron is.

And it's mad really, it must be more than a little mad, for Aaron to look at Robert and know that he knows so much about him.

That this person who isn't his person anymore, is out there in this world just knowing him.

Aaron's eyes flicker a little and he clears his throat, "Must be." It looks like he has to mull it over and then decides against it, almost signifies it with a shake of a head. "You want to join us?" He asks, and it's to sound polite, like a grown up above the noise of the pub.

But Robert's a grown up back and shakes his head, thanks him kindly but declines.

And he leaves the pub altogether, feels Vanessa catch him by the arm and ask why he isn't staging for a celebratory drink. He doesn't even say anything, his face must give it away because she tuts and draws him into a hug and he finds himself whispering,

"I knew every single one." Before he's pulling away and leaving the pub and the image of Liv's face looking up at him with almost pity in her eyes and Alex's arm draped over Aaron's shoulder as Chas looks almost triumphant, is burning into his mind.

And he doesn't feel smug, doesn't feel like he's won and he will keep on winning.

He just feels empty and he sees them happy, sees how little it even mattered really because they were this soft sort of settled weren't they?

'I knew every single one.'

He shakes it out of his head, can't do anything about it as his mind screams:

Yeah, and that's never going to change.

Aaron has the exact same thoughts running round his head too as Alex pulls his arm further around his back.

He shuffles out of his hold. 

[drawerswithouthandles]

*__* I haven’t been this excited in ages OMG... They are skipping past all my worst case scenarios. There is NO reunion over a “dramatic/romantic” gesture... this is not what Christmas is!!! I was so uncomfortable with the idea. That Robert will almost die and Aaron will feel SO bad, he has to take him back! This sends all the wrong signals and leaves Robert just free to NOT change... Robert has to work HARD to get Aaron back now. But not in an ACTIVE kind of way.

Aaron always saw the good in Robert and wanted that for Robert and the first time around, he gave him another chance, after all the affaire horrors, when Robert SHOWED him he had changed and was more caring towards him. Now we get a second stage of that. Cause as lovely as the first reunion was, Robert still left Lawrence for dead, would have taken everything from Chrissie, if he had known about her and Andys relationship before they finalized the divorce terms etc. We saw plenty of stuff where Robert still was just... only out for himself and not willing to change at all... Rebecca was the catalsyst for that. Aaron told him multiple times to stay away from her and that he was unhappy with them hanging around each other. But Robert was so arrogant and confident in his skills to manipulate her, that he just didn’t care (I think I am one of the only ones that really hated the pub backroom scene, were Robert kissed Aaron silent and didn’t acknowledge his worries) 

Now we might be getting that: A Robert that actually listens to people and tries to take their feelings into account before he acts  - A Robert that would have never slept with Rebecca, cause not only would he not want to hurt Aaron (which is nice and all) but he wouldn’t want to HURT Rebecca and destroy his friendship with her just because he can. 

I am so excited for Robert finally letting people in! The fandom was fuming when Robert was left alone when Aaron was in prison.... but did we see him ASKING for fucking help? NO

Cain was there, willing to help with prison, but Robert didn’t go to him. The Dingles would have taken in Liv or Noah, if taking care of them was to much (just like they did now, when Aaron ASKED them to! omg the concept)

But Robert loves to be strong, he loves to be that cocky asshole that can take on everything at once... he could have easily asked Chas not to go to Prage... and she would have stayed.

Same with the support after the break-up, fandom was unhappy with that? Why? Vic was coming round, and Robert insulted her marriage, which lasted LONGER then his and was way more serious (they were trying for kids ffs, living together for years by now) then his and Aaron’s marriage ever was... but Robert is a dick and “Adam is no Aaron” I can totally see, why Vic wasn’t very pleased with helping Robert there. Same with Diane and Doug, who tried to help him... what did Robert do? Complain about the small light free boxroom they were offering him (for free) and calling them boring. 

Robert is just so self centered and this fandom is loving this behavior and then wondering, why he never gets help and support x’D He does, he is just a dick about it.

Hopefully this will change and Aaron will get to see that. Maybe over a couple of weeks, please... like Robert accepting Aaron moving on and letting go and sorting his own shit out with Rebecca and with being a dad. Maybe I can even start to like Dad!Bert cause I am still struggling with that. He never acted in any way that he deserved access to this kid. But maybe he changes and this will change, that he actually CAN be a dad. 

I am guessing the White exit will be the next big thing, where things will change again, we will finally see, where Seb is ending up. I always feared he would stick around and Aaron had to force himself to accept this part of Robert now, but it doesn’t feel that way at all. Cause Aaron has finally options. He is not in a place anymore, we has to hurt himself to BE with Robert. (Or better putting his OWN happiness over the happiness of others)

I am really looking forward to all this *__*

[scrapyardboyfriends]

Jenny’s Belated Live Blogging - 5th November 2018

- First, I love Maxine. I saw someone say her episodes feel longer and god they really do. This episode somehow felt like an hour rather than a half hour. The pacing was so nice and the scenes were longer and not clipped yet there were still plenty of them and she gets so much out of every scene. 

- Second, Aaron wore green! And it was a new green and not that one I hated that looked like it needed a good iron. 

- Pyromaniac, Joker, Friend. What a fitting tribute for dear Gerry. I loved that. And the firework. And Liv getting to be there. And Doug’s little speech and remembering that this was Gerry’s favorite day of the year. (we’ll ignore Arthur’s interruption for now. Soz Arthur but shut up).

- I hope Laurel doesn’t go to Bernice for advice on how to break up with someone. She needs to do it faster. It is later this week right? I hope so. It needs to end. Doug, let her break up with him. 

- I love Ellis with April. They’re so cute together. I’m glad we got another scene of them today. 

- Can Billy not get in fights because I want him to get to the village sooner rather than later because I’ve been primed and now I’m ready to see the fallout. 

- Onto the meat of the episode with the Seb stuff. First of all...look at those communicating husbands! I’m so proud of them. I know people wanted arguing but I like that they’re showing that they can talk to each other too, that they’ve learned something. 

- So...no destroying a car? I guess it’s easy to mistake because Aaron doing actual work is so unheard of so he must have been doing something else and that was the closes they could come up with. 

- I liked their chats though. I liked that Aaron raised all of the questions that we had and I liked that Robert basically said most of what we said for his motivations. I still don’t totally agree with them but it is what it is. I’m still kind of on Aaron’s side, general audience opinions be damned! Haha. 

- I know people have issues with Chas’s sudden involvement and Aaron being affected by Grace and Liv being so invested in Seb and I’m sure a ton of it has to do with the new producers coming in and realizing that things needed changing. But like, I don’t care that it doesn’t have as much basis because frankly Chas should have been more scenes with Seb, Aaron should have been involved with the Grace stuff all the way through, Liv should have had more than like three interactions with Seb. So, I like that they’re rectifying these things and I’ll buy in to them because they should have been that way from the start. Of course, I’ve also embraced Seb as part of their family so it’s always going to work better for me than someone who’s less interested in that. 

- With that too, I liked that Aaron went to talk to Chas about Robert’s decision. I’ve missed them having mother/son time. I was pleased when she finally stopped treating him like a teenager when he and Robert got together but I like them still acting like family and that has been lacking this year so I’m happy to get that now. I also liked her wanting to have words with Robert but I wish we’d gotten to see it. 

- Robert apologizing with Seb was cute and so was Robert helping Liv with her homework while Aaron played with Seb on the floor. And I loved Liv’s snarky little ‘John needs to get a life’ line. And Robert coming over to sit with Aaron and Seb. They were good family scenes.

- And the Dingle birthday party was great. I liked that they all showed up for it. That’s something I like about Maxine’s writing, she always manages to get as many of the people that should be there in scenes if they’re available to her. If she’d had Vic and Diane, she’d probably have gotten them too. 

- The baby welly thing was cute and I liked Robert’s consistency of hating it and throwing it on the fire. 

- Lydia’s little moments in this episode were great too. I love that she’s fit in so well with the Dingles. I’m so glad that they found the right spot for her character. 

- All in all, it was a great episode for me and I loved every second of it (minus having to endure Bobel)

- Also...Cheek kiss - for the fans (Bless you Maxine!)

[nooneelsecomesclose17]

29&40 Robert to Aaron please haha. :)

Here’s 29, keep an eye out for 40 at some point ;))

I figured we all deserved some vaguely happy fic. Place whichever theory you subscribe to in the appropriate place :D

29: I told you this would happen

“I told you this would happen.” Robert hissed to Aaron who was sat next to him on the sofa in Take A Vow. They both had lapfuls of books and magazines that Leyla kept handing them, adding her suggestions along with them. The only respite they got was when she got up to answer the phone. “We could have sorted this ourselves.”

“Do you really want to spend days arguing with Vic about food and my Mum about this and that? Not to mention the whole ‘why can’t we hold it in the pub like last time’ argument. Again!”

“I don’t care about any of it, you know that. I’m happy for it to be me, you and Liv at the registry office.”

“You’re going to tell my Mum that, yeah?” Robert shuddered. While he and Chas were getting on again he wasn’t prepared to do anything to get on her bad side. He might make monumentally stupid decisions sometimes but even he knew that was a bad idea.

Almost twelve months it had taken for him and Aaron to get to a place where they could be together. It probably would have taken a lot longer if he'd not walked past the garage that night.

He couldn't believe it was a year. A year since the happiest day of his life. It seemed so far away. He was at a loose end, didn't want to spend the night with Diane and Doug. They'd been brilliant, putting up with his moping and endless talking about Aaron in the beginning and after when he hardly left the house. Vic had invited him to hers for tea but he couldn't face anyone. That's how he finds himself wandering the village aimlessly. It's dark and freezing cold so there's no one else around.

He ends up outside the garage. He'd thought Aaron had lost it when he suggested it but it had been perfect. Just the two of them, as it should be. He's about to leave, can't fade the memories any more when the door is blown open by the wind that's swirling round the village and he sees there's a light on. He can't hear anything so it's not Cain or Debbie working late. He wanders closer just to check and as he pushes the door open again he sees Aaron perched on a pile of tyres.

He hasn’t seen him for a while. They’ve almost perfected the art of avoiding each other. At first he’d kept out of the way, it was too hard seeing Aaron happy. Not that he wanted him to be miserable but the fact that he was obviously happier without Robert hurt a lot, much more than he thought it would. After that they hadn’t had anything to say to each other. Even when the truth had come out about the baby and Rebecca had fled the village he hadn’t seen Aaron and he’d understandably avoided the pub and anywhere else that people could stare and gossip.

“Robert?”

“Sorry...I...saw the light, thought I’d make sure. I’ll leave you to it.” He turns to leave but he hears Aaron sniff, knows he’s crying and he can do many things but he can’t ignore that. “Are you alright?”

“Do you think about it?”

“Yeah, course.” He steps further into the garage, unconsciously waiting for Aaron to tell him to go. “Is that why you’re here?”

“I don’t usually sit in a freezing cold garage at night for no reason.” He wipes at his eyes with his hoodie sleeve pulled over his hands and attempts a smile. “I should have...when Rebecca left, I didn’t call. I’m sorry.”

“I wouldn’t expect you to. I don’t want to talk about her.” He sighed and sat down opposite Aaron just as he had a year ago. “I really messed up didn’t I?”

“You don’t do things by halves. We both made mistakes, Robert, but it’s done. We need to put it behind us.” Robert’s not sure he’s ever been more shocked when Aaron reaches out and takes his hand rubbing the wedding ring that still sat there, Robert stubbornly refusing to remove it. “It had to be this way though, I had to...I couldn’t keep on like that. It wasn’t fair to either of us. I was scaring myself, the things I was thinking about, what I was doing.”

“I know and I hate that I did that, that I caused you to feel like that again. I can’t forgive myself for that. You...you seem to be better though. Vic says you’re happy.”

“Vic sees what I want her to see, so does everyone. Do you really think I’m happy?”

“You’re smiling again. You didn’t smile much those last few months with me.” Neither of them had. He’d been so scared of Aaron changing his mind and leaving that he’d spent too much time trying to keep everyone happy, denying that maybe he was interested in the baby. Not that it mattered any more. He’d lost everything for a child that wasn’t even his.

“A smile is pretty easy, feeling happy is something else. I was happy with you, wanted to stay happy with you.”

“Guess we’ll never know now.” And that was the kicker, he’d had everything, all he wanted and now it was gone. He’d never know if he could have stayed happy, could have made Aaron happy for years.

“Well...we could...always try starting over?”

“Oi,” He groans as he feels Aaron’s elbow in his ribs. “You’re miles away and while that’s a tempting prospect, we should at least hear Leyla out.”

“Do you not remember the idea she had for our stag night the first time around? God knows what she’ll come up with this time!” He laughs as Aaron snorts loudly enough to make Leyla turn round from where she’s on the phone and glare at the pair of them.

“What were you thinkin’ about anyway? Just then?”

“The night at the garage.” He can’t help smiling. They’d spent longer there than the first time around, talking and eventually kissing like they’d been apart for years, not months.

They did it properly this time around, dates in and out of the village, mostly out because the glares from the Dingles were a bit much until Aaron got them all together and told them to keep their noses out. They talked more, about everything, and nothing. He was used to Aaron phoning him when he wasn’t working at the scrapyard to tell him to daft little things that had gone on or that he was thinking. They hadn’t done that before, they’d just lurched from one drama to the next.

They were stronger now, and maybe the break up had been what they needed, however hard it had been. Not the way it happened. If he could erase that from existence he would but the time away from each other had probably helped them both even if he hadn’t felt it back then.

Now they were getting married again properly this time. This time it was going to be forever. He was sure of that.

“You wanna get out of here?”

“Yes please.”