#even though she spent like 30mins with me and really checked them out

[dreaminginstasis]

I went to the dermal therapist today instead and they’re not milia they’re both two different things, one has fluid in it and the other has blood in it so I have to get a swab done by the gp on both to make sure they’re not suspicious and then I can do laser if it’s all clear 😩

[dyinglaugh]

The place I work at is an international company that looks super great on paper and shows the best face to customers and the outside world. In fact, they suck ass. Like a lot. They want to have robots do thier work and such for them but instead have humans that they work like slaves. No, really. I am not exaggerating. If you are unable to complete a shift, you get points/time taken and when you're in the negative you're fired. Sounds reasonable but when you have medical problems or family emergencies you're still penalized and not excused (you have to use time you have to cover any missed shift time). I have medical issues that can be accommodated but the process is such with this company that it makes you just throw your hands up and quit, so I havent tried (the process is convoluted and arduous on purpose to make workers not want to do this). I have stories from friends who also work here that will make youre blood boil.

1: My coworker has a daughter that is now 7-8years old. When she was 4, she had gotten very sick and needed to go to the hospital and stay for a while to get better. My coworker, upon getting that call at work went to management and requested to leave early as this was at the time an emergency. He didn't have time left (idk why) but wanted to be with his 4 year old child to make sure she was OK. When management noticed he had no time available all they said was "you can go but you may be fired for leaving early with not enough time" (paraphrased). He couldn't leave his job there as getting fired meant no money to buy food, pay the hospital, pay bills, etc. So he was then forced to continue working while his child was sick. (She's ok now though.)

2: Another coworker had gotten a frantic call from her daughter that the family dog (that was in my coworkers life before her daughter was even born) had been hit by a car, dragged by the car, and is now fighting for its life to see its owner before it died, needed her home to say goodbye. My coworker, crying/sobbing that her best friend for many years was going to suffer in wait, went to a manager and explained the situation. Upon seeing that my coworker had no time left to leave early, the manager then made her follow him around to talk to other managers to "see what they can do". The dog died in the street, without her human (my coworker) because the managers decided to dawdle and make her walk with them knowing full well what they were doing. At some point my coworker called her daughter to find out that the dog died while she being dragged around the warehouse with a manager who was "looking for a way to help" when in reality all that was accomplished was a waste of time and a life lost.

3: In order to enter the warehouse, you have to go through security and the turnstiles and then get your temp checked by a thermal camera. The second you open the doors to get to the turnstiles, there are 6-7feet tall industrial style fans to cool your skin temp before being checked. So if you have a fever and enter the building, your temp is reduced by these fans enough so that you can continue to work and make the company profit. They said that its to cool the building down but there are literally hundreds of fans everywhere to do that. So why do these ones need to be placed specifically by the doors?

4: We are encouraged to tattle on coworkers when we see a "violation". Such things include sitting anywhere besides the breakdown or lunchroom. We stand for 10.5 hours. The entire fucking shift. And get in trouble for being in pain caused by this. Also, if we need a bathroom break, we have 6 minutes to do that. This includes getting to a bathroom (2mins), doing your business, and then getting back to where you were. Many people have been written up, including myself (lactose intolerant=bad night) for being "off task " for more than 30mins that shift simply by going to the bathroom a few times. Drink less? The warehouse is typically between 75-90 degreesF (winter versus summer) and quite a few people EVERY WEEK pass out due to heat stress or dehydration, so less water isn't an option.

I dont have those types of problems at the moment where a life will be lost or is in trouble and i hope it never happens. I had heard these stories from my coworkers and I suspect that managers get reprimanded for trying to be lax about the more ridiculous rules. I myself am going through the problem of not being able to apply for medical leave. I'm in the negatives with time as I type this because every single person I've been emailing to fix my system issues in the portal to open a case, has blown me off. I dont know why this company treats the workers so shitty, except they are worldwide and literally every single person uses thier services. I won't say the name since id like to not be fired but I will give the hint that its an online store with the same name as a big tropical jungle. I've talked to managers there that i can tell hate the policies that work against the workers (alot of the policies do) and the good managers are frustrated too.

The system designed by the company is basically like this: low-level worker is promoted slightly and given 50%-100% more work than before with promise of a better pay and such and all they have to do is enforce the policies and step on people to do exactly that. They themselves are still being trampled by the higher ups while being promised that they will get bigger boots to stomp on low-level workers the better they work.

I despise this company so much that I tell every single person the horrors the company will do and will cover up in order to deter them from using thier services. I understand that prices found through this company are better than almost every other company so its just cost effective with people. I dont condemn people for using that company at all actually. Just those who, despite knowing the hardships and harsh treatments of the workers, laugh and still use it saying, " if its so bad why not leave?"

I'll tell you why. Because the company pays ok enough and offers ok enough benefits that we the workers feel trapped. If we leave, who will hire people that have very few skills since they spent years in a warehouse? If we leave, how will we find a better or equal paying job ($15-16/hr starting)? I have hunted and searched for such a job because of my frustration and found absolutely nothing. This company traps workers in a way that makes it so impossible to leave that many fall victim to depression or other mental/physical illness.

Speaking of, I have heard in the half year of working there of at least 3 people almost killing themselves- thats right SUICIDE- due to the stress. In response, the company sends out information and messages and notifications about Suicide Awareness and Prevention. AS IF THEY DONT KNOW THAT THEYRE THE CAUSE. I personally have thought, " if I kill myself, the company can leave me alone. I wont have to work here anymore and suffer almost every night through inconceivable pain without hope of going home". See, I have chronic migraines that put me out of commission for 20 out of 30days a month. Not only have I worked while sobbing and not being able to see or breathe (one of many symptoms I have) I've been forced to continue working until my illness has progressed until I can no longer function. I can't move or see or breathe or hear or anything at that point. I can only focus on one thing and its typically forcing myself to CONTINUE WORKING because the company doesn't care enough to let me leave early. I end up having panic attacks in the bathroom and vomiting due to the pain. This company, as far as I've heard through people I've talked to everywhere, hasn't officially killed people. Unofficially, i had talked to someone that had almost overdosed in order to be free of the company.

Now, I dont include names simply because I'm not a rat or snitch or whistle blower or etc. and because I dont want them to get in trouble for speaking out. I am posting this here because hopefully, its anonymous enough that I dont get in trouble either. I just hope that before anyone chooses to use this company (that has the same name as a jungle), they remember this post. I hope that this is spread everywhere so that everyone knows the horrors the workers have to deal with. I hope so much that someone reads this and chooses to spend that extra dollar on a different website to not add to this billionaires' pockets. Please, repost. Spread this around and add stories of your own because you're not alone. I promise.

[ddesign8or]

I wasn’t ready with the revelation  about my family and why we avoid eating meat.

Entry#100

WE ARE VEGETARIAN! OKAY! What’s the BIG DEAL?

GOD, Chill what’s wrong with you. I’m just asking if you eat MEAT?!... It’s not like I’m a racist or something.

Stupid... I already told you before, I thought as I rolled my eyes from her and took the menu from Jiya. I bit my lower lip as I scanned the available vegetable menu.

I’ll have  Caesar salad and avocado smoothie- weird pair though. 

The waitress took our order and went away. 

So.. You told me before that your family are vegetarians. What’s the reason, though?, She leaned near me with a wide eyed and curious face as she waited for my answer.

I’m not sure, Maybe a family tradition or our religion, I don’t know... I shrugged. But actually- I know.

I was inquisitive when I was young and I always wondered why do we need to avoid meat- from, chicken, pork, beef... any kind of bloody flesh. I always asked my Mom about that every now and then but she always ignored me, not until before I turned thirteen. 

We went to my Nana house, which I called to my Grandma. She lived in a small town where people live with a distant away. The place is beautiful, full of trees - wide fields and some creeks. We usually spent my summer days in my Nana house. But that time, we went there on my birthday, which was very unusual. I wasn’t ready with the revelation about my family and why we avoid eating meat.

Our ancestors have been a faith healer since our great great great grandfather who made a deal to the earthly Spirit. His power was granted, but he needed to avoid meat because something bad will happen if he doesn’t follow. I think someone in our family ate meat, but I never heard what happened to them since it was never mentioned and it always avoided to talk about. They always said they died, in an unusual circumstance.

I don’t really care, but I just follow anyway because my Mom would start being worried if I don’t oblige.

I was updating my Instagram when our order arrived. Jiya handed my order, I wasn’t paying much on what I’m eating, but the Ceasar was good.

I took a bit on my Avocado toast, which taste funny.

Jiya, did you hand me my toast?

Jiya who was sitting across me kept on giggling while holding her phone.

Haha, what’s funny?... , I swallowed a bite, again, and another again.

Hey, Clara... you should look on what you eating.

I stopped and look at her... 

Why? , that’s the time I realized she’s taking a video of me.

Why are you filming?! Hey, !!!...

That’s the time, I realized she switched my toast with her sandwich with MEAT...

I was shocked... and almost throw up in front of her...

SCREW YOU JIYA!!! 

I went to the bathroom. I was waiting for something to happen, 5 mins, 10mins, 30mins, nothing happened so I went out.

I payed my bill and went home and that was the last time I to Jiya.

Hey, are you okay? I’m sorry.. It was just a prank..., Jiya texted. 

I ignored her messages and calls. I didn’t tell my Mom because she might get a heart attack, knowing the fact she’s easily paranoid about things.

I stayed home for a few days and just called the school that I was sick. My mom kept checking and asking me what happened. I just told her everything’s fine and she doesn’t have to worry.

 It’s been days, at first everything was fine when one day. I started feeling a tingling and burning sensation in my whole body. I was sweaty cold and was losing my appetite. I couldn’t dare eating because I eventually threw them up.

One night, Nana visited our house which is very odd because she never traveled far from here home. This is the first time that she visits us so it’s kinda big deal to us. I was wearing my black hoodie, looking pale for not eating much trying to look fine to my Nana. I put my arms on my hoodie pockets as my fingernails are turning purple- almost black.

I didn’t tell anyone about what happened, when she suddenly straight forward dragged me to my arms and confronted me. My mom was shocked and confused with what happened.

Did you eat meat?! , her voice was hoarse and cracking a bit but sure.

I was shaking my head, even though I know I have no way out in this situation.

BE HONEST GIRL!!! ... ANSWER ME ... DID YOU EAT ANY MEAT ... EVEN A LITTLE AT ALL???!!!, her voiced was raising but still steady on her accusation. 

I don’t know how she knew but I need to stop pretending that everything’s alright.

I slowly nodded my head with a feeling of regret. I was teary eyed and hugged my Nana. My Nana stroked my hair and hugged me back, my mom who was confused and terrified joined us. After all  the commotion, we all seated down and started narrating about what happened to our missing relatives. 

It’s all started when our Ancestor made a deal with the Earthly Spirit for power to heal any diseases and to exorcist evil spirit, but of course everything has a price. He’s not allowed to eat meat and everyone of his family and blood line are not allowed to eat meat. 

Nana, was reaching inside to her bag as she continued. - You’re not the first who violated this. I had a sister once, but now she’s gone because of what she did. She’s always curious on what happened to her if she tried meat, even a single drop of blood.

Nana took a small vial, with a dark liquid inside. I don’t know what happened, but the burning sensation started to get. I didn’t know what I was doing, I was fixated on the vial. The odor from it was too tempting. I almost lost myself when my mom gripped my hand and was crying in front of me. I was stunned and realized that I was heavily drooling. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand. Mom saw my fingernails, she gasped and was sobbing uncontrollably.

What’s going on? What’s happening to me?!... Mom,m-om I.. I’m scared. , my heart was skipped fast. I was so scared of what would happen to me.

My sister was inquisitive liked you but she’s different. She’s not scared and would dare to violate things as she wanted. -- My Nana continued as she took another thing from her bag. It was a wooden stake. 

Nana, why do you have that?... Na-na what are you going to do?, I was pleading her to answer me.

I understand you didn’t mean to violate but it’s too late. incurable, we don’t want anything would happen to you or to other people. After three weeks, you would start to change. You start craving for blood and you would unknowingly kill the people you know... She paused and slowly walking towards me... and to People you love.

I tried to run away, when I noticed my hands were handcuffed on the metal railing of the air ventilation. My mom who was holding my hands a while ago slowly walked away and tossed the key away. 

No-No!!! NO NO NO!!! MOM!!! HELP ME! Mom!, I cried to her, but she didn’t budge even a little. She was just sobbing at the corner, not knowing what to do.

I can’t get off the idea that Nana will stab me with that stake. 

I’m so-sorry my Dear... Please forgive me, she raised the stake firmly reaching into my heart. I was crying profusely while trying to get the cuff away.

I didn’t know what happened next, I think I was loosing my sanity. My mind was slowly floating away from my consciousness and I saw the beast inside me with her bloodshot eyes and sharp teeth.

Just let go... Let me take over you

Just let go...

I don’t know who was that, but I’m letting go. I closed my eyes for a moment and let go to the infinity.

I woke up with a hazy memory. I don’t what happened right after, I think I’m dead but maybe not.

Hello, Miss Stoker, I’m Detective Smith ... How are you feeling today?

I don’t know, I thought I’m dead.. I sighed

Do you know what happened yesterday night?

I’m not sure, I forgot..., I lied.

Well, first of all..., she paused, - I’m so sorry for your lost. 

what are you talking about ? who are you?!... I exclaimed.

Your Mother,.. and grandmother was found dead,.. her voice was calm even she’s delivering that bad news.

Tears rolled down my eyes, I couldn’t believe what happened. Did I kill them, didn’t I? I felt so terrible and guilt shrouded over me.

The Detective held his hand offering some tissues. I took it and wiped my tears. 

I hope you can help to what happened... So far the evidences were unrecognizable, so we need more answer from you. I hope you’ll cooperate with us.

What do you mean? Unrecognizable? I didn’t kill them, right? is that what you mean?, I thought. 

I just nodded to the officer and I thought over and over again. What happened that night who killed my parents. I looked at my fingernails, which is now all black. It looks like I painted it with black nail polished. I hope I could get some answers about me and the deal my Ancestors made so I can fix myself.

[domi-scu]

Do you like my coconuts?

Today felt like a beach day. So that’s what we made it.

But because we already checked out all the nearby beaches and still wanted to see something new, google told us about one, called Tub Kaek, that was about 30min drive away and supposedly very quiet because all that is around there are some ‘luxury hotels’.

For some reason, the coffee at our hotel this morning was absolutely disgusting so we had another one in a café across the road just to wake up a little. From there, we walked up to a first taxi we saw and asked if he could take us there.

He said he could and that he’d wait for us there however long we’d like and drive us back. This seemed like a pretty simple solution so off we went. He did offer to stop at a place with elephants on the way which we refused. I had one elephant sanctuary planned near Chiang Mai that actually takes care of the elephants rather than uses them to make money off tourists and I’m really annoyed we didn’t get to do that. But with how packed this place is and how many tour stand offer this experience here, I get the feeling that although they don’t do riding on elephants anymore, it’s really just to make the tourists feel better about being ‘ethical’ but they’re not actually treated that well. We did drive past it though so at least we got a quick glance from the car.

I have to say, I’m a big fan of taxis here because it’s just a truck with a roof over the back and you sit outside. Saves us from aircon and we get nice breeze. We did ask if there is anything else interesting on the way there but he said not really.

The beach was pretty much as described. Not many people, no tour boats and quiet. Exactly what we needed after yesterday. We bought ourselves a floatie so we took it with us and just chilled, read a book and went for a swim. At one point, we decided it was time for cocktails so Alex went for a walk to find us some. I gave him 500 baht note and two 100 notes just in case they didn’t have change. Well he came back saying that he spent all of that on 2 cocktails… I think he may have found the most expensive drinks in all of Thailand.

Thankfully, we also saw a woman with a stand near the entrance to the beach so I walked up to see if she had any coconuts. And she did! We’ve been talking about having some for a few days now but always forgot until it was too late. So I carried two of them across the beach, surprised how damn heavy they were! Who says you can’t get a good workout on holiday.

We did consider renting paddle boards but by the time the sun went down a little, we were so exhausted from the heat we just wanted to go home. We also didn’t dare to look how much the food is around here but were getting fairly hungry.

Once back in Ao Nang, we popped into the same restaurant we visited the first day and I asked for an Irish coffee so I could finally take a picture! Unfortunately they didn’t have any cream so it just looked like a sad iced coffee. Oh well, you’ll just have to imagine it and I’ll try to figure out how to make it at home. As the restaurant was completely empty, Alex had a chat with the owner (I say Alex because as it turns out, I go non-verbal when I’m too hot and tired). We did get some tips on how to bribe Thai officials for work visa. Could come in handy one day.

The evening plan was slightly more active- shopping for elephant trousers! I will probably be buying 5+ pairs at some point to bring home with me because it’s the comfiest thing I have ever worn and I need to get enough to last me until someone I know goes to Thailand next time and who knows when that might be. The majority of the shopping will likely be done in Bangkok, including an additional suitcase, but I saw a really colourful pair yesterday that I simply needed to have. Well that and I also need something to wear here because we packed quite light.

We discussed what to do tomorrow and I decided I could probably pull off driving here because the traffic is surprisingly light. There is a place called Emerald Pool about and hour drive away from here and since renting a motorbike is only 200 baht/day (around £5), we will be doing that! Wish us good luck so that we don’t get lost on the way although it might end up being a more interesting story.

[rosellenjane]

22/09 - Saigon - Day 3 - The Mekong Delta

Well today was a treat for every sense and in every sense. We did a lot so buckle up, it’s going to be a long one.

I started off by getting myself to the travel agents again, I’m not sure why but I’ve been the only one both days to not be picked up from my hotel. Maybe it’s karma for taking Hau with me to book to avoid being ripped off. They were a little late which was good because so was I, there were no grab (Uber) drivers around my hotel for 5mins and then he was driving really carefully which would usually be great but I was subconsciously leaning forward to try and get him to go faster.

So I board the bus, we collect everyone else from their hotels and then have to wait for 20mins for someone running late, she sits next to me and wants to talk but I felt like I was fraternising with the enemy. She kept asking questions about my education and I couldn’t really understand her so I pretended to fall asleep in the end. The bus had really reclined seats which was cool for the first half an hour but after that I got an achey back and coccyx and because she was sat next to me and was genuinely sleeping I couldn’t really move to readjust. I was essentially in a leather coffin with a Vietnamese stranger so I spent the next 1.5hrs sat forward with my elbows on my knees.

We had a stop off for the toilets at some nice gardens, we all got off and I offered to take a photo of two English friends for them and had a little chat, then an Indian guy asked me to do the same for him so I’d acquired 3 acquaintances before we arrived at the main event which was 3 times better than yesterday!

We got back on the bus and I made a passing comment to the tour guide on how reclined the seats were and was that normal in Vietnam, he pointed out that there’s a lever on the side to bring the back rest up. Of course there is, dickhead Rosie. We arrive at the carpark 3 minutes later so well worth the seat adjustment.

We get on board a passenger boat to cross the water to the Islands the delta runs through, the water can only be described as an iced latte (or poo brown), not something you’d want to take a dip in, the Indian and I chatted to Simon a guy from Kenya so acquired 1 more trip acquaintance. The Chinese ask me to take a photo of them so it seems I’ve now turned into the group photographer.

When we get to the other side of the river we try some fresh honey, fresh in a sense that they bring the honeycomb over and grab your finger and stick it in whilst the bees are still on it. I wasn’t sure if my travel insurance covered this so I waited for a spoon of it to be passed round. This was paired with honey tea, honey lip balm and honey jelly so a very sweet 10mins.

Then we had a photo opportunity with a snake around our neck, a pass from me thank you.

Next was some fresh cacao mixed with hot milk (a hot choc) and then down to a cafe to have some fresh fruits, we had lychee, dragon fruit, guava, pineapple and something else that has escaped me, I now love Guava! They put salt on it and it’s really nice! We were also treated to some traditional Vietnamese singing which was lovely, although the finale was ‘if you’re happy and you know it clap your hands’ which was a surprise but we all clapped along anyway. We sat as a 6, with acquaintance no.5 an Austrian girl joining. We all walked and talked together for the rest of the day. (I’m wearing my cat poncho below)

So next was the actual boat along the delta which was what I was really looking forward to, it was hilarious and I shared a boat with Simon and the two English friends, we kept getting overtaken so we helped paddle in the end.

After we clambered out of the boats onto a jetty about 4ft higher than the boat, a larger boat took us to a different island where we learned how to make coconut candies which were nice, and we drank snake wine which was not as nice! As soon as I swallowed it I thought to myself ‘Why, when you have a dodgy belly have you just downed the liquid surrounding a load of fermented dead snakes’. Oh well, YOLO and all that.

Next up was a horse drawn carriage to a restaurant, this was definitely not on the itinerary and took us all by surprise, I felt guilty as there was one horse to every 5 of us plus the handler and they weren’t big stable horses either, but what can you do? I couldn’t get there by any other means.

Lunch was next on the agenda, I got split from my new friends unfortunately 😞 the tour guide asked me to sit on a different table, I can only imagine for numbers food wise. The thing is that it was the Japanese table which as much as they were nice people (one of them held the fish when I was stuggling to flake a bit of meat off) it was shit for me, they didn’t utter a word of English and they were having a raucous time laughing their heads off and I did the British thing of smiling and chuckling even though we were all fully aware that I had no clue what was going on. My mum called me so I had a quick chat with her on FaceTime and she told me to stick it to the man and go and sit with the other table.

We had spring rolls, noodle soup, rice, mud fish from the river (it actually tasted like mud and didn’t even look appetising, not a fan) and soy type chicken, it was great!

I went over to my English speaking friends after lunch as we had free time to explore the island. I went on a hilarious bike ride with the two English friends, it must be the Vietnamese bikes because none of us could ride them (or maybe the saying is false and you can forget how to ride a bike!) they started off on a tandem but soon fell off and got individuals.

After 5-10mins we gave up and retreated to the lunch square where we saw an odd mix of animals - crocodiles, porcupines, snakes, frogs and chickens and then it was time to head back on the boats.

A monsoon strikes! Luckily I had my cat poncho with me which I wore for about 5 minutes until I was just steaming my body and preferred the rain. We all walked through it, crossing a bridge made out of two logs and no handrail like some sick joke, we definitely didn’t cross on the way in when it was dry! The rain really started coming down whilst we crossed the river, I’d packed away the poncho by then and so just got completely drenched with everyone else. The tour guide started singing Elvis on the microphone to keep everyone’s spirits high and then one of the Japs had a go at a traditional song, free entertainment but a little bizarre.

We got back to the mainland safely and the rest of the journey was uneventful really. When we got into the city I asked where I was being dropped off as I hadn’t been collected from my hotel and the guide assured me I’d be dropped at my hotel which was kind. I asked if he knew where it was and he said yes, I left it for 5mins and realised there is no way he could know so I took the key card with the address on it to him because there are a few hotels with the same name. Again he assures me he knows so I leave it. I then get dropped off at Ben Thành market which is approx 30min walk from my hotel, so glad I checked twice with him on that 👍. It was dark and very busy but luckily I booked a grab taxi and it was with me within 30 seconds and 81p later I was back at the hotel.

I’m now packing all of my stuff up as I fly to a small island off the South Coast tomorrow called Phu Quoc, it should be idyllic and I have a beach bungalow for 4nights so I’m looking forward to it. As much as I’ve enjoyed the capsule it’ll be nice to get out of a bed rather than crawl out and to not have to take my key card to go to the toilet at night.

On a separate note, I’ve got 5 cracking insect bites, one that has given me a club foot. And I popped another Imodium this morning for just in cases so I’m not sure when I’ll ever go to the toilet again, I can’t do this everyday right? Reason for death - It was the Imodium addiction that got her in the end!

I’m going to sleep.

Lots of love,

Rosie

[x-avantgarde]

SHINee World V - Hong Kong Experience!

So hello everyone owo I went to Shinee's World V, Hong Kong stop's concert!! (This is a Kpop post, I know but I will be back for vkei in the future! So please stay tuned!!) :D I bought the tickets really late orz and so before I start, I would like to apologize because I don't really know SHINee that well (I know them but I wasn’t a Shawol or anything) and I went because my mom likes Taemin (and SHINee) a lot XDD  (beware of this long ass post haha (it’s 2000+ words orz)

So we arrived at the venue at around 2pm? The merchandise opens at noon but I had this lesson that ends at noon so... We had lunch before we went to the venue (and the place is super far lol, but it's super close to the airport). Me and my mom took the airport express line from Kowloon (Elements?) to Asia World Expo and it was actually pretty quick (~20mins?). But the fare was super expensive OTL (though you get a discount if you show them your concert ticket).

There were A LOT of people lining up for the merch when I got there, but I wanted to get the light stick so badly (because I don't have one? XD) so I just lined up (like whatever haha). The line was super long, the merch was outside but the lines looped into the area where the standing went and waited. Around 30mins in the line I met people from my school lmao XD (so awkward bc we're actually not close?).

There were these people who approached us and asked us when we were in the line about whether we wanted light sticks or not (because they had "a bunch"). It was super fishy so I didn't get any, there were many cases in Kpop concerts where people sold fake light sticks :/// The official ones sold at 80HKD each but those people sold it at 60HKD each :////

After approximately two hours and fifteen minutes, I finally managed to get the merchandise :D Around halfway through the line, the staff gave us this sheet to write down what we wanted. In the end, I spent around 500HKD lmAO. I told myself I would only get the light stick and that was it, but you know what? I ended up getting an Onew fan, Onew key chain and these postcards (rip my money haha but it was so worth it). The Onew key chain is super duper cute!! owo (and yes my favourite member is Onew ouo)

It was around 4pm when we finished getting our merch, so me and my mom decided to go into this (kinda bad) cafe / restaurant place to sit down and eat something. I didn't eat anything because I literally just ate lunch three hours ago X"D Around 4:15, people were starting to line up. There are two places where you can go into the venue, one is on the ground floor, (for people in standing (who already got in) and people from the seating (block 5-13 (aka every block)) in the first rows. (A-M)). I was in block 10 row L so I had to get in on the ground floor.

Around 5:00 we went to line up and get ready to get in. The security was super strict and there were these Japanese girls in front of me who got cut off because they found a camera (but the girl said she went to disneyland and that's why she bought it). They took super long T___T until they finally managed to check my god damn bag. I bought a small-ish backpack but they literally took out everything T______T I understand that they didn't want any cameras inside the venue and stuff, but... uhhh really???

Me and my mom managed to get in, and we walked up the stairs (finally) and found our seats!! :))) On our seats, there was a pack, which included an balloon, a fan (double sided with a member's face) and this banner in Korean //orz what does it mean haha//. I got Key's fan so it's okay /but ugly sobbing because I didn't get Onew T_T/.

It was supposed to start at 6pm but they were super late (because Taemin had this earpiece problem so he kept apologizing during the introduction / first MC T___T (like CHILD ITS OK (let me give you a hug lmao). When the fans sat down, it felt super unreal, and it all felt like a dream. When the lights dimmed and we started screaming and chanting, "SHINEE! SHINEE! SHINEE!" They played a video (to our disappointment haha).

After that Shinee cAME OUT :DD They started with the song Sherlock and it's super good XD But I didn't warm up yet so I was kinda stiff and I didn't scream and all. (For some reason, I felt super awkward). But I was waving my light stick, just enjoying Shinee performing :))

The next song was Married To The Music and I was starting to get more hyped :) I lowkey sang along XDD I think they came out in suits or something (i forgot orz). Then the next song was Juliet (and the chorus is so catchy?!?!) After these three songs, it was MC timeeee! ^^ they started talking about how they haven't been to Hong Kong for a long time (around four years??) so they were really happy to be back. Key mentioned about how HK food was really good or something haha.

(Starting from this part, the order of the songs are going to be all messed up). They changed clothes somewhere after the MC or something like that (they changed way too often!!). I got more warmed up as Reply came up :DD Everyone sang along to it (and dude it's so good hahaha). You know how people would scream when a member's part comes up? That was me when Onew's part came up XD But it felt like I was the only Onew fan in my section because when Onew sings there were nearly NO ONE screaming T__T (It felt lowkey awkward because I would only be hearing my screams hahaha).

Then midway they changed into casual and I swear, Key looks SO GOOD in real life. During Lucifer, I was so hyped hahahaha. Key took off his white jacket because it was "too stiff and too hard to dance in it", and also he was like, "I look better without it". OMG XDD And guess what was underneath his jacket? A grey sleeveless shirt. SLEEVELESS. HE LOOKED SO GOOOD OMG. XD In the middle of the setlist /forgot which song orz/ he made the hand heart and it got onto the mini screen on the side. I got /shot/ in the heart owo.

THIS IS THE HIGHLIGHT OF THE CONCERT FOR ME HAHA. OKAY. During some song, Minho winked and gave this smooch towards the crowd OMG. AND IT WAS LIKE WINK THEN AIR KISS. /DIES/ WHEN HE DID THAT, I LITERALLY SPAZZED OUT ON MY SEAT HAHAHA, I WAS LIKE 'WHAT IS LIFE?' (He is so extra?!?! X"D)

In the middle of the setlist, (ESPECIALLY DURING Everybody), I got super duper hyped and screamed like crazy whenever it was Onew's part X"D (and also when their choreography was super cool). LIKE WHO CARES, I'M HERE TO HAVE FUN BITCHES XD During Everybody, these Japanese girls (again XD ikr, they have a lot of Japanese fans haha), also got super hyped XDDD Even though we weren't supposed to film, no one honestly gives a shit? (including me lmao). I filmed for around 30s in total XD (just to document the hype and it's the only thing I can hold onto after the concert T_T (other than the merch)).

They also performed Why So Serious, 1 of 1, So Amazing, View (that was aWESOME), Ring ding dong (the crowd was so high XD (including me hahaha)), Prism, Feel Good (CLIMAX OF THE CRAZINESS HAHA), Shift (don't really remember anything XD (except the fact they performed this song). The atmosphere was so awesome!! :))

In around the first quarter? Two members changed first, then the others went. Key, Minho and Taemin stayed first X"D Minho or Key was like, "I'm wondering if any of the members off stage are eating right now (referring to Onew and Jonghyun)" XD Then Onew and Jonghyun came back, wearing silk material / soft / shiny fabric clothes :DD it was so cool haha. (I think they also performed Dream Girl but I don't remember what happened T_T).

(I'm listening to SHINee's songs while typing this up so ahahahahaha) They sang a lot of the slower songs during that silk material clothing part XD (whatever you call it haha). Onew and Jonghyun also sang a duet-- Please Don't Go. This song was so touching and T_T //feels// Onew's voice was so sweet <333 /melts/ (Jonghyun's voice is also good <33) Hopefully Jonghyun's not sick or anything because he struggled a lot with hitting the high notes T___T especially during the duet and Replay QAQ

During Feel Good, oh my... oh my... The lyrics in the chorus, "I can make you feel good" X"D Everyone sang along in that part and I was kind of hesitant but I GAVE UP. So I also sang along and that was sooooo fun. This was one of the songs I like hahahaha. Though I wished they performed Tell Me What To Do because Jonghyun's voice in that song is GREAT.

There were a lot of Key and Taemin fans hahaha. Whenever it would be Key or Taemin's part, girls in my section would be screaming ahahah (like me in Onew's part X"D). And Onew's smile just melts my heart ouo Taemin also did a solo performance, he performed Sayonara Hitori (in Korean). His costume was so cool (there were these ribbons(?) that are sewn onto his sleeves, so whenever he spreads his arms it would look kind of like wings :D There were also these long stripes of red fabric hanging from the ceiling. There were also smoke(?) in the floor to make it even more dreamy <33 When my mom heard that song, she shook my arm excitedly and said, "This is my favourite song from Taemin!!" /lmao/ It was super cool and I enjoyed every single second of it /and I lowkey sang along because it's so good hahaha/

Skipping to Aside!! It was actually when we were supposed to blow up the balloons (which had led lights inside of them). I struggled a lot (because honestly I've never successfully blown a balloon before... until now XD) but the crowd looked super good because of the flashy balloons :DD Even Jonghyun was thankful for what the fans had prepared :DD (because he mentioned it in the ending speech).

Skip skip skip, time for chanting the encore! The fans actually started singing happy birthday (in Korean) to Shinee (as it's nearly their 9th anniversary!) ^_^ Every time we want to start over again (by singing happy birthday), we would all laugh as we don't know when we should start singing again haahaha (if it makes any sense XD). They came out in the moving carts (LIKE FINALLY?!) and the crew played So Amazing in the background. I really wanted to get one of their signed balls (that sounds wrong LMFAO /i'm sorry/) but I didn't manage to get one T_T because Onew and Jonghyun actually tried throwing some to my section but they didn't manage to throw it pass the crew (bc the crew was sandwiched between my section + the moving carts) OTL

/HIGHLIGHT NUMBER 2/ Since Minho was the only one on his cart, he actually stopped in front of my section (directly in front of me) and did the hand heart (like the one you make the heart with your arms + head??) towards my section XD I cried ahaha, and you know what? Before I knew it, MY HANDS AUTOMATICALLY DID AN ARM/HAND HEART BACK TO HIM. HE WAS SMILING SO BRIGHTLY OH MY GOSH. (No one in front of me did a heart back so it's actually possible he might have seen me in the corner of his eyes /dies from happiness/ /but it's okay if he didn't actually see me because giving a heart towards my section is already good enough <333/)

They did the ending speech and they reminded us to support Key's new drama <33 Shinee also told us that they will be back soon (isn't that what all the overseas idols say lmao). And it ended! I was so sad T___T they played a video (or some MV /i forgot/) and in the end the screen said "Thank you and love you" XD It was really touching but my mom had to ruin the moment and said, "Yeah, more like thank you and love your money" LMAO.

It was such a great experience and I have definitely fell in love with Shinee :D (who wouldn't if they attended Shinee's concert haha). It was so different from Visual Kei's lives and I might be doing a comparison in the future so please stay in touch with me! <3

[cyclingpacificthoughts]

The Kindness of Strangers

Distance Cycled: 412km (256miles) Distance Climbed: 4,282m (14,049ft)

Joe and I have been blown away by the friendliness and hospitality of those we’ve met in British Columbia. Perhaps we’re used to the coldness of Londoners and the eyes down, avoid all conversation mentality of public transport there. 

We found almost everyone to be extremely welcoming, willing to strike up a conversation or just say hello without becoming overly intrusive. If however you do engage you can find yourself discussing diverse topics from politics to a British favourite; the weather.

Perhaps we look slightly lost or disheveled and people take pity, perhaps it has something to do with our Alzheimer’s Society cycling tops, or more likely, perhaps people are just really nice when you stop and take the time to talk to them. It also helps that Joe is much more inclined than I to just ask the nearest person while I’m trying to make sense of my Garmin or map. This usually results in a range of good advice to extreme generosity.

A big thank you to Bill and Shelly, Rosemary, Barry and Phyllis, Sam and Kathy, Tim and Diana, for their help and all the other people who stoped to talk or offer encouragement/advice.

Tuesday October 3rd 2017 Tour Day 4 Cycle Day 1: Vancouver to Porpoise Bay

Our introduction to Canada couldn’t have got off to a better start. Through pure chance (and the fact that their house was walking distance to our bike shop) we spent the first 3 nights in Vancouver at Bill and Shelly’s AirBnB. One of the nicest couples you could meet, upon discovering that we required an extra evening than originally planed to take in some bike mechanic lessons, they extended their own spare bedroom to us as the basement apartment was booked. They also extended an invited to dinner that evening (incredible lamb burgers), the perfect last super before disembarking. Our luck continued as this meant we met Sam, a neighbour who now spends most of his time on Denman Island, but happened to be in town. He almost immediately offered a place to stay should we make the small detour off Vancouver Island.

The Last Supper: Bill, Sam, and Shelly.

Not done, the following morning Shelly cooked us breakfast to see us on our way, including some homemade Kombucha, a South Korean fermented drink, both delicious and healthy! Perhaps a pop up in London to follow…

Setting off there was some adjustment to getting used to the weight of all the gear hanging off the bikes, which at first felt like our nimble bikes had turned into oil tankers.

First day smiles.

We’d not even made it out of Vancouver when at Prospect Point, just prior to crossing Lions Gate bridge we stoped for a quick photo opp. Here we got chatting to a British woman named Rosemary Angil. It turned out that her mother in law had recently died having suffered from Alzheimer’s. She asked for our details and when we next had Wi-Fi discovered she’d made a significant donation. Thank you Rosemary!

A post shared by Kit MacInnes-Manby (@kitty_magic) on Oct 4, 2017 at 8:06pm PDT

Prospect Point - Leaving Vancouver.

As a brief aside, a big thank you to all of you who have also donated, I’ll be thanking you all in person when I get the chance.

Spirits high we set off and enjoyed a scenic ride though West Vancouver, stumbling across Gleneagles Golf Course along the way up to Horseshoe Bay.

Much easier to get a tee time here.

Having arrived 7 minutes too late for the midday ferry, with bright sunshine and glorious bay views we begrudgingly settled into a burger and pint to toast our first 1% of the trip.

The 2.15 ferry was waiting, at the dock another cyclist told us where to wait. We waited, and waited some more, when 2.13 struck, we decide to double check… Turns out we were in the wrong loading bay and had just missed it again! 4.30 was the next one, which while annoying didn’t appear too bad as the sun was still shining and the park looked appealing.

This extended delay also gave me the opportunity to talk to two backpackers who spend their time crossing the country for work. They were selling dried sage, lavender, and other herbs which I exchanged for the cost of a ferry ticket so they could get home. He told me something about the spirituality of what I was doing and it would help take my energy with me… …I’m not sure about all that but it has kept my clothes smelling nice and fresh so I take that as a win!

BC - Many ferries, which are ideal at breaking up rides and meeting new people.

Finally on the ferry and off the other side we faced a not too daunting 25km ride to Porpoise Bay. As is typical of a ferry exit we were met with an immediate and steep climb, however I’ve thus found that this serves the purpose of warming up the legs again. The final stretch seemed fine until we got to Sechelt just as the sun was setting.

Which while beautiful meant cycling the last few km in the dark. Secondly we both began to “bonk” as we clearly hadn’t been fuelling ourselves enough. This resulted in a somewhat unpleasant short in distance but long in mind final 30mins.

Things got worse as having successfully got the tent up in the dark, with dinner on the go, a park ranger turned up and informed us that we were not in the designated camping area. This designated area was a whopping 25m from where we were. Despite not a single other person being there (nor did we see one before we set off) we were forced to decamp and move. All in all not the best end to our first day on the road.

Wednesday October 4th 2017 Tour Day 5 Cycle Day 2: Porpoise Bay to Lang Bay

Another beautiful morning and Joe’s porridge later we set off continuing on the aptly named “Sunshine Coast”.

The views from Porpoise Bay.

We set off with the initial goal of Powel River but it turns out the Sunshine Coast while sunny, is rather lumpy. Joe quickly established himself as KOM taking all the mountain points, dancing up hills like a mountain goat. We made it to Madeira Park at which point we were both thinking that we may have been slightly naive in how easy it would be to cycle fully loaded bikes 2000 miles.

Alarm bells should have been ringing when my check in luggage was 20kg (without my rather considerable camera gear as carry on). Add to this the 14kg bikes (the price of robustness) and my own weight and you’re looking at somewhere between 110-120kg, or one Ed “Chunk” Monkley that I’ve got to lug up every hill!

Ed in his natural habitat.

(I’ve since weighed myself at a truck stop which came out at 300lbs equating to 136kg - however this was probably rounded to the nearest 50lbs)

The slogan quickly became what goes down must go up. As much as it was fun to carry large momentum down hills (and at times break the speed limit) it was almost always not worth it for the inevitable hill shortly afterwards.

It is also where we named out bikes. My steed has been dubbed Shirly the Surly, as I ask her at the bottom of each hill “Shirly, you can’t be serious”. Joe has named his Susan, as he’s “cuzin on suzin”.

Madeira Park offered a delicious pizza from a guy who had sacked off his consulting job that took him all over North America, to make pizza in this small and scenic corner of the world. With slightly tempered ambitions of Saltery Bay instead of Powel River we set off.

Pizza 🍕

It was on the Ferry from Earls Cove to Saltery Bay that we got chatting to Phyllis. When we told her what we were up to she told us about her own travels in Europe, including one evening spent in a park with her friend and a Scott (complete with Kilt) after their bags were stollen holding passports and traveler’s cheques. Having experienced her own share of stranger’s kindness along the way she insisted on putting us up.

Joe and I duly obliged and arrived to meet Phyllis and her husband Barry, where we were treated to our own lodge! After a quick swim in the bay to ease our aching legs we whiled away the evening hours over a few beers with our hosts before retiring to the lodge. Joe initially only making it as far as the sofa for bed.

Ice therapy.

Barry and Phyllis.

Thursday October 5th 2017 Tour Day 6 Cycle Day 3: Lang Bay to Denman Island (Part 1 | Part 2)

Joe whipped up some more pancakes for breakfast and after saying our goodbyes, feeling greatly refreshed we set our sites on Denman Island and our invitation to Sam’s. We were treated to some of the most scenic riding so far as the trees thinned out on the way to Powell River.

With about an hour to kill Joe popped into a secondhand bookstore (he picked up something roman as he’s predisposed to do) and walked out with another $5 donation to the cause. I made a brief trip to the bike shop as I’d adjusted my gears terribly and hadn’t been able to access many of them since Earl’s Cove. A quick pit stop at a local recommendation; Base Camp Coffee and it was onto the ferry.

Somewhere around here we reached our most northern point and the true start of our journey south. One would be tempted to think that it is all down hill from here. One would be wrong.

Knowing that Sam was out until late we took a bit of time to explore the coast line of Comox and stumbled upon another coffee stop (fuel of the cyclist) at Grind where we found an epic whey protein, peanut butter, banana milkshake which served as an excellent lunch and another fine view.

A casual and yet more scenic ride down to Denman Island ensued and ended by encountering a salmon roll while waiting for the ferry (think sausage roll). Sadly I would miss the following day’s offering of salmon wellington!

Felling somewhat tired we were pleased to discover a local vineyard en route and having never even heard of BC wine thought it rude not to.

Corlan Vineyard has been running for about 10 years now and has some delicious wines. Not that you can go out and buy any as it’s exclusively sold at the farm shop. We tried the red Marechal Foch (French / American hybrid) and the white Ortega. Sadly the blackberry and Sigerrebe wines were sold out but Pat the owner allowed us to go and pick some of the remaining blackberries from this year’s harvest to taste. I had to taste quite a few to make sure each one was as tasty as the last.

A bottle of red purchased it was on to Sam’s and we arrived to a fairy light lit wood cabin. Sam’s wife Kathy was just putting the finishing touches on some freshly made pizzas, topped with local produce, some of which came from their own garden. It’s tough to beat a welcome like that.

Sam and Kathy

Friday October 6th 2017 Tour Day 7 Cycle Day 4: Denman Island to Chemainus River Campsite

Following another great evening we made an early start for our longest ride yet - 140km.

Perhaps over confident from the previous day’s riding and the last 4 days good weather we set ourselves the ambition of Ladysmith or as far south as we could get. The first signs were encouraging as we fairly deleted kilometres, after 2h30 seeing off 60km along pleasurable flat costal roads. Stoping in a (don’t judge) McDonalds for a quick coffee and some wifi at Parksville we looked back with pride and thought we’d smash the next 60km in similar fashion. Oh hubris.

The following 60km were nothing like the first. The costal route gave way to highway 19 with no obvious alternative. The first rain of the trip descended and we spend what seemed like an age going up gradual gradients on small highway shoulders with 18 wheelers for company.

Highways - Fun.

Nanaimo has become a name etched in infamy for us as it seemed to stretch on forever and Ladysmith seemed to be forever just the other side. Some bike paths did appear but they were either so hilly or perturbed by tree routes as to be impractical. So much so that my tent decided it had had enough and got off the ride with my shoe subsequently attempting suicide to stop the torment.

Goodbye cruel world.

Ladysmith eventually arrived, food and warmth on the agenda. Wigwam Chinese seemed perfect, as it was the first restaurant we found.

Large quantities of Chinese later, with it still fairly early in the day, feeling much better for ourselves we pressed on south to Chemainus Campsite, offering much needed warm showers, a camp fire and what is becoming Joe’s trip speciality; cheesy pasta mixed with whatever we’ve managed to find that day.

Saturday October 7th 2017 Tour Day 8 Cycle Day 5: Chemainus Campsite to Victoria

Looking forward to our first rest day in Victoria it was a short ride to the Salt Spring Island ferry. The local coffee stop provided the next chance meeting. Tim, an absolute legend, who in his 71st year is still peddling around when he can. We talked the perils of leaving your bike unattended, the virtues of a helmet mirror (which we’ve finally purchased in Portland), and the joys of touring in general. Tim has cycled all over the North America and Europe, including two trips down the North Pacific Coast! What’s more he is a resident of one of the US’ best cycle spots; the San Juan Islands. Once Tim found out we were headed that way he insisted on having us to stay, another awesome act of generosity.

Fellow tourer and awesome human Tim.

Salt Spring Island itself is a lovely ride. Quiet roads, rolling hills and plenty of interesting stops. However It was described to me as the Hamptons of Vancouver so not without its downsides. This was confirmed at the local Saturday market where someone attempted to sell us kale crisps at $9/100g…

Checking out the local market.

Another ferry the other side into Swartz Bay to pick up the Lochside trail (the Scotts get everywhere) all the way into Victoria.

This essentially ended our British Columbia riding. BC had been a blast but also eye opening as to the scale of what we were taking on. I had expected this part of the trip to feel more like being out in the wilderness, however the roads and other infrastructure were excellent, which while convenient, was slightly disappointing (only very slightly). I guess I have to hand it to the Canadian government for managing to tame such rugged terrain, coming from BT I know we can’t even get decent broadband to some parts of London let alone the Outer Hebrides.

And Finally

A rest day in the BC capital Victoria, then on to San Juan and Washington State, tune in next time to find out more.

[theidntheego]

Day 1

Our first ever family trip (without Yh though). The first for Claris on a plane - and she is really excited. Am thankful for K who came to pick parents and I up and sent us to the airport, had Swensens and brought them to see where the memorable Control Centre where I used to dread reporting to work was. The place of uncertainties, fear, dread - now that I'm out of it it also made me think if the experience had also shaped a part of me as a person. Was afraid initially cos of problems checking in online cos of apparent visa and ticket info mismatch. The time spent at the airport with my family and K was not elaborate but yet it made me feel really thankful and comforted. Blessed, to be with the closest ppl in my life, all together at once. Had Mum walked all the way to the gate far away and felt pretty bad. Then was start of flight and I actually was really excited for Claris first flight experience, for some reason. Caught some sleep in between. Looking at he stewardesses serving, collecting trays and having difficulties sliding it back to cart, kneeling down to talk passengers, walking down the aisle selling duty free... had wanted to watch show but felt like being in the moment with mom as we were eating. Felt like I have been so critical of her - failing to realize she is also not getting younger, failing to realize she is also someone who has emotions and insecurities and I also struggle with my own. At times it does feel like how K responds to me is also the way I respond to Mom. One that is probably out of slight impatience but also of a certain expectation that hey I thought you can do better. The first day has been really perfect - I wouldn't have asked for any other way to spend it. It was nice that even though we were tired and hungry we weren't on each other's nerves and were practically quite easy going. Upon reaching the BNE airport, we waited and talk a coach that brought us to surfers paradise. It took close to 1h 30mins. Outside the hotel, little Claris commented that 'Australia also not cold' - perhaps still unaware that seasons and a country's weather changes throughout the year. Some thing the little girl who resides near equator has yet to realize. We had western food at Cavali stretch, really close to the beach. At the beach, with the waves crashing on the shore, the wind blowing against our faces, the fine sands underneath the feet, the warmth of the sun on our bodies, the love and familiarity of family around - i was overwhelmed with a sort of joy, happiness and a feeling that I was really embracing the moment. Against Papa's disproving looks about the danger of being.m in the sea, Claris and I ran towards it. As we attempted to do a jump shot, Claris landed on her buttock and we laughed. The force of the waves on the shore was indeed strong, especially for a small girl like Claris. The experience at the beach, though short is one that I really hope to rmb in time to come. Then woolworths with parents then back to hotel (when Claris wrote how she felt on her first plane ride and jumped on the three beds in our room) then Thai for dinner then woolworths again. And then now. It's been a long but really heartwarming day. And I am really thankful.

[xmusicalelliex-blog]

This Is The First Day Of The Rest Of Our Lives

"I can't wear this lion suit Dan!" Phil exclaims. 

Phil's boyfriend, Dan, was sat on the bed they shared together. Phil was hid behind his long wardrobe door. He didn't want to let Dan see him in his lion suit. He agreed to wear it for a video he was filming for his Youtube channel.

"It can't be that bad babe. Just let me see." "No! I'm not moving." "Okay. You asked for it."

Dan got up from the bed and walked over to the wardrobe where Phil was cowering behind. He lunged forward and started tickling Phil.

"No! Dan! Stop! Pleeeaaasseeeee!" Phil shouts. 

He started running away from Dan and tried locking himself in the bathroom. Dan was too fast for him.

"I have you now!" Dan yelled.

Dan cornered Phil, pinned his arms up against the wall and looked into his deep blue eyes. He lifted his hand and brushed it through Phil's ebony hair. He tilted his head until their lips cenimetres away. He stayed there for a few seconds, teasing Phil, and then closed the gap. That little spark had egnited a fury of flames that rose inside of them. 

A little thought poped in to Dan's head. 

"Fuck I want to marry this man" 

That started it all. They spent the rest of the night cuddling together on the sofa, stealing kisses and just being really cute. As Phil was taking out his contact lenses and brushing his teeth, Dan pulled up an incognito tab on his phone and started looking at male engagement rings. He browsed and browsed for about 2 minuites until he heard a voice beside him.

"I somehow managed to drop one of my contact lenses down the drain."

Dan jumped to the sound of his boyfriends voice. He quickly closed the tab and  locked his phone, hoping that Phil didn't see the page that was open moments ago.

"Hey what's up?" Dan asked, trying to act as casual as possible. "I have to wear my glasses until Monday because I just dropped my contacts down the drain. I did just tell you this." Phil replied. 

He went to sit next to Dan and put him arms around his neck.

"Are you okay babe? You look like you've seen a ghost." "Yeah don't worry. It was just something I read on the internet. It doesn't matter though." Dan kissed Phil lightly on the lips, "I'll talk about it later"

They both got into bed and fell asleep, wrapped up in each other's arms. The next morning, Dan did a little more browsing and found the perfect ring for Phil. He got up extremely quietly and went into the kitchen.

"Hello?" Dan asked. "How may I help you this morning sir?" The other end spoke. Her voice was quiet loud and perky and she seemed nervous. "I'm looking for the silver promise ring with the cat whisker engravements on the inside." "Ahhh yes. The cat-cut promise ring. It's been a big seller this winter. We do, in fact, have one left. Would you like me to reserve it for you?" "Yes please. Can I pick it up today?" "Certainly Sir!"

After sorting out the details, Dan hung up on her. He turned around and heard Phil walking towards the kitchen.

"Morning babe!" Says Dan, pouring a coffee for his sleepy boyfriend. "Dannnyyyyyy... Come back to bed, I want cuddles" Phil whines. "I can't Philly. I have to pop out for a few hours." "Why? And who was that on the phone?" "Oh, just an old friend who wants to meet for coffee. Don't worry, I wont be long"

Before Phil could say anything, Dan had kissed him goodbye and was already out the door. Phil just stood there, cold, confused and panicked.

'What if he's found someone better? What if he's gotten bored of me? What if he's cheating on me?'

Phil spent that morning curled up in bed with his laptop and a coffee. He thought that, if he didnt think about it,  he wouldn't have to face the problem thats caught up in his mind. At about 11am, he got a text from Dan;

D: Meet me at the fountain in 30mins xx P: Where are you? Are you okay? Where have you been? Do you have your key because I don't know where mine is? xx D: I'm nearly at the fountain. I'm fine. All willbe explained and yes I have my keys. Anymore questions? ;) :P xx P: Sorry, I was just worried about you. I'll see you in 30 xx P: I love you xx

Phil didn't get a reply after that. His heart was racing and his mouth was dry. He knew something was wrong. Dan never leaves a message unanswered. He got changed and headed down the stairs of their building. He jumped into the nearest taxi he could find and checked his phone again... Still no answer.

When he gets to the fountain, he sees his chocolate haired boyfriend, all dressed in black, sat on the edge. He calls his name and makes his way towards him. 

"Hey beautiful" Dan exlaims "Hey baby. What are we doing here?" Phil asks cautiously "Oh I just thought we could go for a walk. You look really cute in your glasses." "Ahhh okay then and no I don't!"

The two men walked around the park, had in hand, until they had done a full circle and ended up at the fountain again. Dan took his hand from Phil's and started walking forward.

"Okay. I don't know how to say this or even if you want me to say it but I'm going to say it." Dan says. "Babe Please" Phil pleaded. "No" Dan shouted, "I've been wanting to say this for a while now but I just didn't know how.

Dan turned around and walked towards his boyfriend.  He had tears in his eyes and he was shaking. He took hold of Phil's hands and bent down on one knee.

"Phil, I love you. My life has gotten so much better since you have been a part of it and I want to be able to call you mine forever. I love you baby. I love the way you try to hide the fact you eat my cereal. I love the way you're always there for me if I'm feeling low. I love it when you wear your glasses because they make you look amazing. Sometimes I'll hide your contact lenses, just so you'll wear them. I love that you're the only reason I kept living. I love you so fucking much Phil." Dan said, looking into his eyes. 

He took his hands from Phil and reached into his pocket. He pulled out a little black box and opened it. He looked back up at Phil and said the four words that would change their lives forever.

"Will you marry me?"

Phil didn't know what to say. He too was crying and he bend down on one knee to join his boyfriend.

"Of course I'll marry you, you spoon! I love you so much. I thought you were going to break up with me as you were acting all funny last night and this moring." Phil said, still in tears.

Dan leaned in and managed to stop Phil from talking even more by kissing him.

"I'm not going anywhere babe." Dan said, putting the ring on Phil's finger. "You're suck with me now"

They kissed again but this time it  lasted for what seemed like a lifetime. The sound of clapping and cheering began and the two looked behind them to find that a small crowd had gathered to watch this little love scene. The two men laughed and got up from the ground. They both clasped hands and started walking back towards their little flat.

"This is the first day of the rest of our lives" Phil whispered to Dan. "And I'm glad that I can spend it with you" Dan whispered back.

[rehnro]

Instruct a man, you instruct an individual. Instruct a woman, you instruct a nation. (Moroccan proverb)

Checking into Morocco: The trip to Morocco didn’t get off too well when my flight from Munich was delayed the evening before leaving me with only two or three hours of sleep between repacking and a 6am flight from Stansted. It did work out in the end and Ryanair’s service levels didn’t fail to remind that you should not use them unless there is really no alternative. The flight was smooth and we landed a bit ahead of time leaving just the border to clear. Easier said than done. All foreigners have to fill a landing card, but there was zero pens available. So put a smile on and borrow one. Took me 20min in total (good I wasn’t in a rush I guess). Next stop was my rental car. At €50 for the two days plus petrol it seemed a good choice. Avoids having to go the center to get a lift for same or more fare in some dodgy old car. Especially on the way back the additional flexibility should come handy. The funny thing was first that you have to return the car with a quarter of the tank full and secondly cars needs to be clean in and outside. Given the state of the roads to Imlil (base village for Toubkal hikers) this means I need to get a car wash sorted prior to return or just pay some €12 for them to do it (I am certain that this add-on is a firm part of their profit margin ;o).

Getting to Imlil: With data on my BT mobile priced at £5/mb (!) I had little desire to use google maps or any data for that matter. So normal navigation by asking actual people (that don’t speak English all that well) was on the menu. Unusual these days. The signposts were close to useless due to lack of signs or them being all in Arabic. However, a petrol warden drew me a simple map that worked spot on. The 75-80km from Marrakech airport to Imlil to me about 90mins and allowed for a start at 1.15pm.

Hiking up to ‘Refuge du Toubkal‘: I had some bread first given I hadn’t had a proper meal since my Schnitzel at Munich airport last night and got water. Off we go and this time not with a crazy heavy bag, but say 15kg (the new camera & go pro & batteries adding back some of the saved weight from new equipment). Overall it required a moderate 4h 45min total to hike up ~1,500m over 10km distance to reach the refuge at 3,207m. This time I arrived at 6pm and hence before sunset. Many of the people I passed on the way would arrive 2h later or I didn’t see them at all (one English couple/friends I asked if they had torches given their speed would mean they finish in darkness and can end in tears).

The weather looked initially worse than back in December as it was snowing in Imlil already (1,740m altitude). However, not as much gusty wind and no comparison to the rain/snow storm last time. Views were limited to say the least given the precipitation. Most importantly though given the again tight timetable of two days, the forecasts were for fine weather Tuesday am and only little new snow (vs 25cm last time). Next bigger snow is only expected Wednesday pm (10-15cm). It was very cold though closer to the refuge (-10 degrees?) and even my ice climbing gloves didn’t cut the mustard. Good to have mitts as back-up though I will try the Muntain Hardwear ice climbing gloves to start.

Recharging batteries at the refuge: After check-in and some hot tea, I had to rest for a good hour to recoup strength. Been a long day. After a solid dinner (chicken, potato, carrots, soup, bread, tea) it was time to prepare for tomorrow (about 2.2km distance in steep upwards terrrain including just under 1,000m altitude gain to the summit at 4,167m). Breakfast at 6.30am. Not early enough for sunrise, but before the snow gets warm. Most importantly … I hope my watch will fix the navigation aspect this time (having failed miserably once before). The Toubkal route was the first thing I programmed when I got my Suunto Ambit Peak 3 recently.

One tip – don’t forget your passport: A Dutch / Moroccan couple left their passports in their Imlil hotel when they decided to go hiking at short notice. She had to get her mum to confirm passport details or be refused to stay at the refuge. That’s pretty stupid of the refuge people to say the least. You are a refuge for a reason and sending unprepared hikers back down in darkness is only asking for trouble. Not really an issue for international travellers, but be warned still.

Reaching North Africa’s highest peak: After a brief breakfast I set out at 7am. I think only the english bloke who also stayed in my room left earlier (5.30ish). This time I took the correct valley up and since it was daylight already it was hard to miss. Soon after me five Italian ski mountaineers followed suit as well as a British  group of three hikers. The snowfall hadn’t been too bad though there was some trail-breaking required on the less frozen parts of the route. Here the Italians on their ski’s had a much faster pace. Weather wise there were some clear patches early on, but soon clouds arrived, wind set in and temperatures dropped well below zero (eventually I had to put on my mitts). The route is pretty much a straight line up te valley until you reach the ridge, which you follow for anothwr 30mins to the summit. My pace was relatively moderate, but steady and I reached the top at 11.30am after 4,5h for the 1,000m altitude gain. Mission accomplished! Both the Italians and the English team beat me to it, but that’s not important (they went to bed after while I felt in strong condition to push all the way down). Thinner air was a headwind while physical fitness was rock solid. After an uneventful 30mins at the summit (for there was little to see unfortunately) and a few refreshments, I made my way back down and reached the refuge 13.45. Parts of the way down you can actually slide on your bum and I once more appreciated the GPS on my Suunto that gave confidence even when visibility dropped to 5-10m.

Get me out of here! My desire to spend more time at the refuge (I had considered lunch) dropped significantly when I realised that ‘someone’ had opened the two dry bags I left behind (probably the same guy that charged me €2 for one cup of tea!). Nothing was missing (I took my money with me), but it’s just sad. I did let the guys know that this not cool, but the response only I got was that i should have put my stuff in (their) locker. Very helpful. This and the rip-off culture of Marrakesh really leave a bad image of Morocco (I have been advised since that outside Marrakesh its much better). By 2pm I was back on the trail, which remained largely snow-covered and new snow kept on coming. Without a single stop (apart from a few conversations with hikers heading up) it took 3h back to the car in Imlil.

Lost in Marrakesh: Driving the 80km back were uneventful. Life got a little trickier when I drove into the city center without a map or clue (still without mobile data). I found a parking space near the great square and took it gladly (€7/night were a rip-off, but I didn’t care after 10hours hiking and two hours driving today). Then quickly across the bazar and into the medina (old town) to hopefully find the Cafe Arabic that firstly sells a much desired cold beer (otherwise really hard to come by) and secondly has decent wi-fi. The latter was important as I still needed a place to sleep (it was 8.30pm by now). The issue is to find your way round the medina. Not even google maps works here. After trying my luck alone I ended up tipping a guy to get me there. Within 30mins I had my beer, spaghetti carbonara, booked a great hostel nearby and had caught up with events. Prices in this cafe are very much like home (i.e. expensive), food quality very average and the guests almost exclusively expats and tourists. But its nice and a welcome refuge from the craze of the buzzing markets. From there the maze continued and I needed one more guy to get me to the hostel (I paid him €4 to do so … so pretty much like an ‘Uber’ minimum fare (£5 in London) or a 15min taxi ride to the airport (MAD40) … but he wasnt happy still!).

Quality time at Equity Point Hostel: I checked in around 9pm. The value deal was for €9/night including breakfast. Respect though I would miss breakfast that is only served 8am to 10am. As most places in the old town, the building looks rather shabby from the outside. Once you get in, you’ll find plenty of space, a pool, a roof top and a bar (even showing Champions league with City beating Monaco 5:3 & selling drinks). The best thing about hostels is that you usually meet people and equity point didn’t let me down. After a quick shower I met 4 of my 6 room mates in the bar. On one hand two brothers from New Zealand (not that I would have guessed, Nico and Deniro?). Nico is an engineer involved in the new Tottenham stadium (to make some money for the next travel I gathered) and the other a lawyer who is about to start a 6mth job with HSBC in Hong Kong. They had managed to get hold of two local coats from €35 each today and now blended in well into the streets of Marrakesh. On the other there were two French girls who are teachers as I understood and just spent 3 weeks working in Southern Morocco (Clo & Julie). Over a few bottles of wine we touched probably on every main topic there is. Politics (in Europe, US and even NZ), refugees, religion, backgrounds (the brothers have been travelling a lot over the years), favorite travel destinations, socialism vs capitalism, Australian binge drinking and aggression, global warming, London’s drug culture  (list not exhaustive by any means!) …  you name it! One of the brothers had trekked to Everest base camp in January this year and so we had a good amount of chat on mountains and Nepal too. Loved every moment and really hope our paths’ will cross again!

The three arabic words I picked up …

‘BsaHa’ – cheers / May god give you health

‘Jamal’ = Camel

‘Djellaba’ – Traditional Berber robe (what the two kiwi’s wear in the picture)

Key takeaways: Visit this place in central turkey (I forget the name Clo ;o), Brasil (Julie lived there for a year also teaching i believe), New Orleans (best nightlife ever according to Nico), don’t work for Australian farmers (they rip you off apparently though farm work doubles the length of your stay I learned), take a solar charger to Nepal and buy a local SIM.

After six hours sleep and an actually painless transfer to the airport (I even had time to get the car washed … out of principle) it was time to say good-bye. I guess I have to come back to see the ‘other Morocco’ one day.

وداعا

(‘wadaeaan’ – goodbye)

Morocco’s cold shoulder: Climbing Jebel Toubkal Instruct a man, you instruct an individual. Instruct a woman, you instruct a nation. (Moroccan proverb)

[theidntheego]

Our first ever family trip (without Yh though). The first for Claris on a plane - and she is really excited. Am thankful for K who came to pick parents and I up and sent us to the airport, had Swensens and brought them to see where the memorable Control Centre where I used to dread reporting to work was. The place of uncertainties, fear, dread - now that I'm out of it it also made me think if the experience had also shaped a part of me as a person. Was afraid initially cos of problems checking in online cos of apparent visa and ticket info mismatch. The time spent at the airport with my family and K was not elaborate but yet it made me feel really thankful and comforted. Blessed, to be with the closest ppl in my life, all together at once. Had Mum walked all the way to the gate far away and felt pretty bad. Then was start of flight and I actually was really excited for Claris first flight experience, for some reason. Caught some sleep in between. Looking at he stewardesses serving, collecting trays and having difficulties sliding it back to cart, kneeling down to talk passengers, walking down the aisle selling duty free... had wanted to watch show but felt like being in the moment with mom as we were eating. Felt like I have been so critical of her - failing to realize she is also not getting younger, failing to realize she is also someone who has emotions and insecurities and I also struggle with my own. At times it does feel like how K responds to me is also the way I respond to Mom. One that is probably out of slight impatience but also of a certain expectation that hey I thought you can do better. The first day has been really perfect - I wouldn't have asked for any other way to spend it. It was nice that even though we were tired and hungry we weren't on each other's nerves and were practically quite easy going. Upon reaching the BNE airport, we waited and talk a coach that brought us to surfers paradise. It took close to 1h 30mins. Outside the hotel, little Claris commented that 'Australia also not cold' - perhaps still unaware that seasons and a country's weather changes throughout the year. Some thing the little girl who resides near equator has yet to realize. We had western food at Cavali stretch, really close to the beach. At the beach, with the waves crashing on the shore, the wind blowing against our faces, the fine sands underneath the feet, the warmth of the sun on our bodies, the love and familiarity of family around - i was overwhelmed with a sort of joy, happiness and a feeling that I was really embracing the moment. Against Papa's disproving looks about the danger of being.m in the sea, Claris and I ran towards it. As we attempted to do a jump shot, Claris landed on her buttock and we laughed. The force of the waves on the shore was indeed strong, especially for a small girl like Claris. The experience at the beach, though short is one that I really hope to rmb in time to come. Then woolworths with parents then back to hotel (when Claris wrote how she felt on her first plane ride and jumped on the three beds in our room) then Thai for dinner then woolworths again. And then now. It's been a long but really heartwarming day. And I am really thankful.