#everyone was TALKING in the background. and people were bringing up questions I didn’t know how to respond to bc I’m a fraud who doesn’t

[secondpersonpov]

Ugh I feel like I sounded really incoherent and dumb in my last meeting today (after feeling like I sounded really incoherent and dumb in dnd yesterday lol) and my boss was there and the creative director asked me to record it (at least I know he’s not going to bother watching that shit) buuuuut at least I’m going home right now

[bvidzsoo]

The trace of you

Author: bvidzsoo

Pairing: psychiatrist!Jeong Yunho x patient!female reader

ꕤ Warning: bullying, mistreatment, ptsd, mentions of insanity & abuse, mental health talks, psychiatric diagnose, unethical thoughts and actions ꕤ Word count: 25.1k ꕤ Rating: mature ꕤ Genre: dated around the late 1800's, psychiatrist x patient, lots of yearning, mutual pinning, forbidden love, inspired by Alias Grace, angst ꕤ Summary: Being caged inside your home for a wrongdoing you can't even remember seems to not have the effect people have been expecting. With the arrival of a foreign doctor with studies unheard of before, your life takes a new turn. Will Doctor Jeong prove your innocence, or will he fall into your web like everyone else? Are you sane, or is he just as insane as his patients?

A/N: Helloo, my lovelies! ^^ Wrapping up this story took way too long due to me having some unplanned health issues that are still (?) kicking my ass...anyways, keep in mind while you're reading this that there are probably historical inaccuracies to this story, especially to South Korean history that I briefly read through when constructing Yunho character's background. The dresses MC wears also aren't the most accurate, but I hope you can look past that and imagine instead whatever you'd like. I watched the mini-series Alias Grace and was rather inspired by it, so you will find similarities to it within this story. I am no medical professional, so the diagnosis MC is given might be inaccurate even though I have taken my time to research these things. Let me know if I should tag anything else as a warning, and I really hope you enjoy this story as I have tried making it a bit different. Let me know your thoughts about it, I am always excited to read your feedback! <3 Oh, and, I hope Santa brings you something sweet tonight, this is my not so small present for you all! ^^ divider

            The old clock’s ticking seemed to only get louder by the second. The sheer curtains were pulled to the side to allow more sunlight inside the tea room, the grand doors opened to let in the late fresh summer breeze. The white hydrangeas lining the paths leading towards the back garden were gorgeous and carried a strong scent with them, I could smell it from my spot on the soft faded pink cushion of the sofa brought all the way from France. The tea room had been remodelled not long ago. There was something about it that gave old cottage vibes, but it has now been upgraded to a more fashionable Parisian feel. It was pretty, with hues of light peach and a darker coral, however, I used to like more the cosy feeling of the sage green and baby blue colours that had decorated the room once. Karina liked it more this way, she had said something about the lighter colours giving the impression of a bigger room. I did not understand why the tea room was required to look grander than it already was, but I didn’t question her judgment. It was best if I didn’t, not out loud, at least.

The servants were quietly waiting outside the room as my mother paced in front of us, Karina perched on a fancy chair with an abandoned book in her hands. I knew the ticking of the old clock and the silence was driving her mad, but I remained silent as I gazed forward, eyes on the gravel path. I longed to walk in the meadow close to our house, but I wasn’t allowed to roam around on my own. Even inside my own home, I was under constant surveillance. The doctors have said it was for my own sake, but it felt like I was in a continuous cage. It was suffocative, I couldn’t sleep some nights due to it, not even after drinking Mrs. Humphrey’s delicious camomile tea. My last hope resided in summer, in the warm breeze that kissed my cold skin, everything a lush green where I looked, to keep me sane. As sane as it could, since I was deemed a madwoman long ago.

Unlike the others who hired chauffeurs and dated carriages with old horses, this doctor arrived by a fancy patent motorcar. It wasn’t him driving it, at least the servants had whispered that to each other, but his long wool coat looked expensive too. My mother finally stopped pacing and Karina sighed in irritation when there was a knock at the front door. One maid stepped forward and opened the door for the doctor, gently greeting him. I couldn’t hear his voice, I was trying to catch the song of the birds outside, but I could feel the shift in the air. It was warmer inside as if the sun had stepped through our threshold. It warmed my skin like none other. Finally, the doctor was led towards the tea room, my back to him as my lips moved in a whispered song that comforted me. If I ignored the coil of my stomach and the sheen layer of sweat over my brows, I could convince myself that I was fine. That whoever came to check on me wasn’t another vicious man eager to torture a damned soul like mine.

“My apologies, ma’am, I am unfamiliar with these roads.” The man’s voice was deep yet soft, like honey, thick but inoffensive. At least if I told myself that, it calmed my rapid heartbeat. As I continued sitting rigidly, my fingers wrung together, the tremors never disappeared. It was something natural, the other doctors have concluded, something they couldn’t fix about me. Another thing they couldn’t fix about me. It was fine, I knew I had been damned a long time ago.

“Oh, it is no issue, we are glad you made it, Doctor.” My mother’s voice was filled with deep relief as the crease between her brows finally disappeared, hands locked behind her back as she rushed towards the entrance. Karina was surprisingly silent, but her expression spoke volumes. Her eyes had widened and her mouth had parted, fingers barely clutching the book in her hands anymore. I gulped, trying to steady my irregular breathing. I knew what was coming, the same questions and objects this doctor, too, would use to check my stability. I dreaded it all, I wanted to scream and throw a vase and make it shatter against the ground, but I would only be deemed even crazier. My eyes shook when I heard footsteps approach, heavier than those of my mother or Karina, it was the man. The Doctor. He was coming further inside, I could feel his eyes trained on my nape, no doubt curious and with a glint madder in his eyes than in mine, here to dissect me, pick me apart just to never fix me. I saw polished black shoes stop before me, and the lump in my throat almost made it impossible to speak up.

“Miss Harold, my name is Doctor Jeong Yunho.” Then, unlike any other doctor had done, this one’s knees bent until he was crouching in front of me, looking at me. His eyes were round and kind, a dark brown unlike my icy ones, and they were filled with warmth and softness I hadn’t seen in any other man. His nose had a perfect slope and his fair skin was sun-kissed, the apple of his cheeks a rosy red. His lips weren’t too big but pouty and full, asking to be traced gently by soft fingertips. I shuddered, completely taken aback by his youth and beauty. The man was from faraway lands, yet judging by his speech, you couldn’t tell until you saw him. He was gorgeous, he was breathtaking, “Would you feel safe if it was just the two of us in this room?”

No, I wanted to scream. My fingers tightened against each other, I gulped and hesitantly nodded, our eyes spilling into each other’s as if a spell had them locked together. His features were serene and sincere, not a frown on his beautiful face to create creases, just a soft smile pulling at his lips. It was disarming and frightening at the same time. Then, the doctor smiled even wider as he stood back up, his height intimidating. My heart raced as I watched him, unable to take my eyes off him. And he was still looking at me as he spoke up, “If you could excuse us, I’d like to speak to Miss Harold in privacy. It won’t take long, I promise. I’m only here today to familiarise myself with her.”

“Good, yes, Doctor, whatever you need.” My mother sounded reassured as she gripped Karina’s arm, yanking her out of the tea room as she seemingly didn’t want to go. Her eyes were fixed on Doctor Jeong, and her cheeks were blushed, “Would you like a cup of tea before we leave?”

“No, but thank you, Mrs. Harold.” The doctor hummed, his voice warm, as he sat across from me. He had no leather tool bag, nothing. He only carried a ragged satchel bag, a dark green with patches made to it, and it seemed mostly empty. My heart couldn’t settle down, not yet. Maybe his tools were hidden in the pockets of his long black coat. He hadn’t taken it off, and he looked like he wasn’t planning on staying for long. I couldn’t decide whether that thought reassured or unsettled me even more. Silence stretched on as we stared at each other, my throat dry, but I made no moves to drink from my fine China cup. I gulped when the doctor finally moved, reaching inside his bag. Here it came, the torture for the next hours, he was just like all those other doctors. I could feel tears prick at my eyes and my chest felt on fire, my lungs constricting, but the world seemed to stop moving when the man finally retracted his hand from inside his ragged bag. He held no tool to harm me, instead, a slightly withering daisy was gripped daintily between his long fingers.

“I plucked this for you on my way here, Miss Harold.” The doctor spoke, leaning forward to extend his hand towards me. A daisy, from a man like him. A man who felt like the sun itself, warming my cold particles, how unusual. When I did not move to take it from him, his happy expression seemed to fall slightly. Before he could feel more disappointment, I quickly leaned forward and grabbed it from his hand. Our fingertips brushed for a second and the doctor gulped, loudly. I loved wearing my copper hair in a simple bun, lined with fresh daisies. How coincidental that I had made myself a daisy crown just this morning, and now, the doctor had brought one for me. It would’ve been endearing if it was from a suitor, but I haven’t had one since I was sent to the asylum.

“Everything has a price, Doctor, what must I offer in exchange for this?” I found my voice, less shaky than I had expected. My insides were twisting in every possible direction, my heart hammering so fast it made me feel lightheaded. I wondered whether I’d remember the doctor tomorrow morning still. It wouldn’t be the first time I experienced sudden memory loss.

The doctor frowned, sitting back on the couch stiffly, “Perhaps, your honesty? Will you answer my questions?”

“Will you measure my head and poke at my skin like all those other doctors?”

“No, I’m not here to physically evaluate you. I’m here to glance inside your mind.”

“That unsettles me more than getting cut open to determine whether my blood is still red or not.”

“Had they done that to you?”

“Yes, you should rather ask what had they not done to me, Doctor Jeong.”

The doctor gulped, his dark eyebrows pulled together now and his lips downturned. He fished for something in his pocket, and a small pair of spectacles were placed low on his nose. It made him look more mature, more serious. I wondered if he wore it so that the other doctors would take him seriously, or whether because his eyesight wasn’t the best.

“I won’t cut you open, Miss Harold, I won’t even touch you during my examinations.” My heart skipped a beat despite hammering uncomfortably against my chest, and I wondered why. His words, however, did bring a little comfort.

“How will you determine what is wrong with me, then?” I raised my eyebrows, my fingers popping when I released the tension from them. I laid my palms flatly against my sage green dress, and the doctor’s eyes fleetingly glanced at them.

“By talking, by listening to your stories and thoughts.” The doctor spoke of a practice I hadn’t heard of before, “If you trust me, that is, your secrets will be safe with me.”

“Will they be?” I smiled, a little ashen, “The committee will want to hear what I said, there are no secrets we can keep with each other, Doctor Jeong.”

The doctor hummed, an almost amused smile pulling at his lips, “My profession requires me not to disclose anything personal, so, even if the committee wants to hear it, I won’t relay our conversations word for word, Miss Harold.”

I gulped, analysing the man’s face. He looked sincere, his eyebrows didn’t twitch and he wasn’t sweating despite the coat still around him. It was summer, and it was warm outside, albeit not inside the tea room, that is why the grand doors were opened to let the warmth in. This room reflected a lot about how I felt on the inside, always cold and hollow, waiting desperate for the warm sun to fill me up with its hotness until it burned me away. I wanted to burn, I wanted to be freed of all I had to endure until now.

“You need my honesty, but are you willing to be transparent with me?” My question seemed to take the doctor off guard as his eyes momentarily widened. Then, he clasped his long fingers together and placed his arms on his thighs, leaning forward in his seat.

“As long as it helps us move forward and remains professional, I can be transparent with you, Miss Harold.”

“You must’ve read the reports about me, do you think I’m mad, Doctor Jeong?”

“Isn’t everyone a little mad, Miss Harold?”

“I don’t know, you are the doctor between the two of us, Doctor Jeong.”

“Indeed, and I claim that nobody is without faults or sins.”

“Then you must be a religious person, no?”

“My profession contradicts my beliefs, yes, but I do believe there is something stronger and greater than us, Miss Harold. If we ask for forgiveness, we shall be pardoned.”

“Father Leon would love to have you at his service, Doctor Jeong.”

The doctor chuckled, a small smile settling over his lips as I realised I hadn’t looked away from the man since he had sat down on the couch. That was news. I never looked anyone in the eyes, as I didn’t feel comfortable. I had been told by previous doctors that they could see straight to my soul, my wicked mind and rottenness in the blueness of my irises. Now I never looked long enough to let them see what was inside my eyes, but this doctor didn’t seem to be afraid of me, of what he might find inside my eyes. Could he not see the darkness of my soul? Or was his faith so strong he preferred to spot the brightness before he was proven wrong by the wicked that permeated those like myself?

“Do you believe in God?” Doctor Jeong’s voice was louder than before, more filled with emotion as if my answer was crucial to him.

“I suppose I must. Everyone says the devil was the one to make me act like this, and I wonder where had God gone to let the devil do this to me.” Doctor Jeong’s cheeks became a darker colour as he licked his lips, mouth parting, but no words left it. I hummed, placing my right hand over my left one. Doctor Jeong wore one single band of silver ring on his middle finger on his right hand. He couldn’t have been married, then, I concluded.

“Perhaps you’ll find an answer to your question once I have done my job here.” Doctor Jeong’s tone caught a solemn note, but I said nothing as he grabbed his satchel bag and adjusted the collar of his white shirt. I watched the motion, eyes glued to the fair skin of his neck even as the man stood. His ears were flushing red too, I wondered why. I suppose the summer warmth had gotten to him at last.

“You are leaving already, doctor?” I asked as I looked up, standing when I realised he was about to depart. My mother had raised me with good manners, I would have even walked him to the front door if it weren’t for Karina suddenly barging inside, her jawline set tight as she sent me a fierce look of displeasure.

“Eager to have him all to yourself, sister?” Karina’s voice dripped with venom as she rushed further inside, rudely grabbing the doctor’s arm. What if he didn’t want to be touched? Karina lacked the awareness to consider that for a second. The doctor remained silent as he looked between me and Karina, and I just chuckled, looking down to the floor.

“I already have him all to myself, no need to be eager about it too.” The forced smile on Karina’s face would’ve satisfied me, but now I wanted both her and the doctor gone from my sight. My heart was racing again and I couldn’t breathe well, the tremors of my hands would’ve made me spill my tea if I were to drink from it. Perhaps Matilda could accompany me around the gardens, I wished to become one with nature for the remainder of the day.

“I shall see you tomorrow, Miss Harold.” Doctor Jeong bowed his head slightly before he let himself be dragged away by Karina, who sent me a glare that would’ve scared anyone else but me. I let them leave as I crumbled back onto the sofa, suddenly feeling faint. I couldn’t decide whether the doctor would pick my mind apart or not, and it was scarier that I had no idea how he’d do it.

            The air felt oppressive and thick, yet I could see the doctor’s motorcar approaching in the distance. Matilda had been kind enough to accompany me on my walk around the gardens, but she had rushed me back inside the tea room when my mother sent a butler to alert us that the doctor was fast approaching. Now, sitting on a chair by the open grand doors, I could see the dark clouds gathering around in the distance. It was as if they were trying to chase the doctor away, but he kept approaching until the motorcar's engine died down and his heavy footsteps echoed around the house. There was a knock at the door as my eyes watched a small white bird on a branch of a tree, my mind absent. The heavy footsteps approached further inside, and I turned my head to look up at the doctor.

“Hello, Miss Harold.” He said with an easy smile on his lips, holding his satchel bag in both hands. He didn’t wear a coat today, and the sleeves of his white shirt were rolled up. His nape was sweaty as the top buttons were unbuttoned. The heat had finally gotten to him, it could get rather cruel in this part of the county.

“Hello, Doctor Jeong.” The smile came easily to my face. Despite only meeting him yesterday, my heart wasn’t racing like before. Perhaps it was the absence of his leather tool bag and the fact that the man was so young and innocent-looking. Before we could proceed, however, there was a knock at the door.

“Doctor Jeong,” Karina’s unmistakable voice called out with a shake to it, “Would you like some tea before you start your…examination?”

“The heat is already killing me, but thank you.” He declined with a gentle flick of his wrist, yet Karina lingered in the doorway. She was only looking at the doctor, her favourite dress ironed out and tightly cinched at the waist. I turned in my seat and watched her with amusement. She wasn’t subtle at all.

“May I help you?” The doctor asked, sounding confused as Karina stood still and slightly jumped, looking down abashed.

“No, I’m sorry.” Then she finally departed, closing the door behind her as Doctor Jeong had asked. I slowly looked up at the handsome doctor, finding his eyes with ease as his spectacles were close to slipping off his nose again.

“Won’t you sit, Doctor?” I pointed towards the chair, which was placed a decent distance away from mine, just by the other door. The breeze had picked up into a strong wind now, it blew inside and rattled the sheer curtains. I welcomed it with closed eyes while the doctor settled in, the rustling of paper caught my attention as I slowly fluttered my eyes open once again. It was silent for a second as I looked at the doctor, who was already watching me. His pouty lips were parted and his ears seemed to be red. As my eyes travelled all over his fair skin, I noticed the glint of something silver underneath his white shirt. It appeared to be a necklace, and once he leaned forward to retrieve a pencil from his satchel bag, I spotted a silver cross hanging off it. He really was a believer, then.

“Did you want to sit here?” The doctor asked as he leaned back in his chair, crossing one long leg over the other. I hummed, clasping my hands together in my lap as the tremors slightly subsided. My heart was at ease, it finally wasn’t frantic like during breakfast and my walk in the gardens.

“Yes, I find nature most beautiful during this time,” I answered the doctor, turning my head to gaze at the white hydrangeas. Their scent was so strong I could almost taste it in my mouth.

“So, you like storms, Miss Harold?” The doctor asked and I chuckled, turning my head away when there was lightning in the distance.

“No, doctor, I’m terrified of storms.” I smiled as the doctor paused, he was jotting down my words in his notebook, I came to realise. He quirked an eyebrow, so I continued, “My father died saving me after I had fallen off the ship, the storm was terrible.”

The doctor hummed, his eyebrows slightly furrowing as he quickly noted what I had just said, “Are you afraid of water, then?”

“No,” I shook my head, our eyes meeting and staying locked as if we had been hypnotised by each other, “I’m only afraid of the destruction a storm can cause, even on land.”

“Have you seen many of those?”

“Yes, our neighbours’ barn was destroyed just last month, it was terrible.”

“Have you helped him?”

“As much as a woman can help, yes, I offered them my servants to help rebuild the barn.”

“Then you’re caring.”

“I suppose, if you say so, Doctor.”

“Do you not consider yourself a caring person, Miss Harold?” I smiled, watching the doctor’s expression even out as his pencil pressed a hole into the thin paper of his notebook.

“As a doctor, do you care for your patients?” I raised an eyebrow, genuinely curious since I hadn’t met anyone like him. If he dissected the mind, he must care for his patients, no?

“Within the limitations of my oath and law, yes, I do care for them.” Then the doctor seemed to consider his next words, licking his lips as his eyes bore into mine. They were wide and dark, and it was easy to get lost in them, “All I wish is to do is find a cure for them, to see them walk free of their shackles.”

“Can you cure madness, Doctor Jeong?” My voice sounded small, almost afraid. The doctor’s eyebrows furrowed as he averted his eyes, messily scribbling something down in his notebook. As I peeked at it, I realised the alphabet I was familiar with blended with one I did not know. Perhaps it was his mother tongue, then.

“Every person has a trigger, Miss Harold, if I find yours, I can cure it.” Then, he bit his bottom lip, and the added words were silent, “If you’ll let me.”

Silence stretched on, and I felt my heart race for the first time since I had seen the doctor today. It was unsettling, I felt my cheeks warm up. The redness from the doctor’s ears seemed to spread down towards his neck and chest, I wondered if his skin was as smooth as it looked at first glance. Then, without considering my next words, I let the truth slip past my chapped lips.

“I want to be free, sir, I don’t want to live like this for the rest of my life.” I had been young when I was convicted. My fate could have been much worse, but the men my father had been once acquittanced with owed him one, so they came to my aid. My sentence was very generous, the judge deemed me mad and unfit to be locked up in a women’s penitentiary, and instead, I was bound to constant surveillance for the rest of my life. Even when I slept, Matilda was there with me. Or my mother when the maid was too tired to continue keeping watch.

The doctor wetted his lips again, leaning slightly forward in his seat. The pencil was clutched tightly between his long fingers, and his tone had dropped lower too, “I can rid you of your burden if you’re honest with me, Miss Harold, I can set you free. But for that, you have to tell me everything that happened and made you do what you did.”

“Why won’t you say it, Doctor? Have you not read the reports? I was the talk of the whole town, still am, actually.”

“Something isn’t right about the reports, have you been truthful in your testimony?”

“Wouldn’t I be breaching the law if I wasn’t?”

“People lie all the time, Miss Harold.”

“May God forgive me for my sins, then, Doctor Jeong.”

A vein in the doctor’s forehead bulged as his jawline strained, mouth open but no words leaving his pretty lips. He huffed, then leaned back in the chair, eyebrows furrowing deeply as he wrote messily in the notebook once again. I smiled as I watched him, his black hair fell into his eyes as he looked down. His spectacles threatened to slide down his nose altogether, and I itched to fix it for him.

“Let’s start at the beginning, then, shall we?” The doctor’s tone had turned uncharacteristically soft as if he was talking to a frightened child. There was a fire in his eyes as he looked up once again and I gulped, feeling unsettled under his sudden undivided attention. His left palm pressed into the side of his thigh, his fingers tapping his black slacks rhythmically. I gulped, then nodded.

“What would you like to know about me, Doctor Jeong?”

“Tell me about your childhood. Your likes and dislikes, who is most dear to you and why. Have you loved before? Do you feel lonely now? Just tell me everything that crosses your mind.”

He wanted to know everything about me. It felt unravelling, dangerous. He had said my secrets would remain with him, would he note them down in the language only he spoke? Or would he tell the committee right after he was finished with his examination? Taking a deep breath, I turned my head to gaze outside once again, my lungs deflating as I exhaled long and loud. The lightning was closer now, the little birds were nowhere to be seen. Something coiled in my guts as my father’s face flashed behind my eyes, his warm smile and his kind tone still so present in my mind. If he were still here, perhaps nothing would’ve happened. There would be no Karina and Mr. Brooks, I wouldn’t be condemned for life.

“Much like I am afraid of storms, Doctor Jeong, I’m afraid of solace. It hadn’t always been like this, while my father was alive, I had never felt alone for even a second. He’d take me to the woods on horseback, we’d pluck flowers for my mother and he’d teach me everything he knew about the fauna and the poisonous mushrooms. He’d read stories for me before bedtime, and he had even taught me how to read. He was my favourite person, now it’s my mother and Matilda. She’s a young maid, we had found her hiding in the stable last winter. She was almost frozen to death, I thought I might be giving her a second chance at life if I took her in as my personal maid. She doesn’t speak much and I can’t tell whether she hates me or not, but I know she loves it when I take her on walks in the garden. I think she’s a little bit like me. Out there, in nature, we can both pretend to be free, just two girls roaming between flowers and giggling about the future.” The doctor’s hand seemed to be moving with my words, it was as if he tried to capture and note down everything I said. For that sole reason, I didn’t speak quickly, I let the words settle both in his mind and on his paper.

“I suppose my childhood isn’t anything special, I come from an aristocratic family, you must imagine what it was like. I was raised to have good manners and bow in front of men, but not without having an opinion and a mouth to voice them with. My father had been a fair man, he and my mother had always made every decision together, so he raised me to find a man who sees me as his equal and his other half. There had been moments when I had rebelled, I think that is only normal, but I was never a moody or explosive child. You can ask my mother about that, she’ll tell you so too.” I said as the doctor nodded along to my words, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration. I took a deep breath and watched his face as I continued talking, “There was only one thing I loved as much as I loved my father, and it was ballet. But that, too, was taken away after I was admitted to the asylum. Ever since then, I haven’t touched my pointe shoes. I had even asked Matilda to hide them deep inside my closet, my heart breaks anytime I catch a glimpse of them.”

A lump formed in my throat just from speaking about it, I could feel tears in my eyes as I watched the tree branches move violently with the strong wind. The willow tree looked gorgeous in the wake of the storm, and I wished nothing but to step under it and close my eyes, let the wind destroy my bun and rip the fresh daisies out of my hair. I took a deep breath, trying to ignore the dark flashes of memories I had tried to forget so badly. The asylum was a cursed place, filled with evil people who only caused more harm. I hated it and everyone that was associated with it. I could feel the doctor’s eyes on me, and he gulped, inhaling sharply. I glanced at him, and he looked amazed for some reason.

“Can you tell me about the asylum, Miss Harold?” My muscles tensed despite the doctor’s soft tone, and my heart started racing painfully in my chest. I thought wringing my fingers tighter together would stop the tremors from worsening, but it didn’t. I felt lightheaded as my own shrill screams echoed in my ears, but I couldn’t speak. My bottom lip shook as I took a breath through my mouth, and shook my head frantically, “Alright, it’s alright, Miss Harold. We won’t speak of it, take deep breaths.”

The doctor leaned forward in his seat and I rigidly turned to face him, my eyes wide in fear as I waited for him to strike. Maybe his mask would finally slip, maybe the tools were hidden inside his satchel bag. The notebook, his scribbling, my stories…maybe they were all just distractions. And yet, the doctor’s eyes remained kind and ridden with worry as he seemed to breathe through his mouth as well, as if he was mirroring my actions. I closed my eyes as the first thunder shook the ground, and inhaled deeply, keeping the air in my lungs until I couldn’t no more. I released the shuddered breath and opened my eyes again, only to see the doctor gulp, loudly. His pupils were dilated and made his eyes seem completely black, his fair cheeks flushed deeply as his long fingers tightened around his pencil once again.

“Perhaps we should end the examination here, Doctor Jeong.” My voice was strained as I gulped around nothing, “The storm is here. You should head home before it worsens.”

As if nature had agreed with me, the air filled with electricity as lightning struck not far away, the thunder loud and following shortly after. Doctor Jeong’s jaw tightened, but he nodded, humming approvingly. He swiped his bottom lip with his thumb before he grabbed his satchel bag, adjusting his spectacles as they did slip off the slope of his nose. Thunder wracked the earth again as a colder breeze billowed past us, ruffling my dress and the hair that had fallen out of my bun. It also moved Doctor Jeong’s messy hair, jelled back and out of his eyes in an attempt to make him look classy. As the doctor stood, slipping the notebook inside his satchel bag too, I mirrored him, smoothing down my dress.

“I call what we do here sessions, Miss Harold, and not examination.” The smile was easy on his lips and I hummed, flinching when the wind slammed the grand door of the tea room against the wall. Perhaps it was time to close them, “I shall see you tomorrow?”

“Of course, Doctor Jeong, please take care on your way home.” My eyebrows furrowed in worry as Doctor Jeong nodded, opening his mouth to say something just as the door to the tea room was yanked open. The man in the doorway was unfamiliar, but he looked worried.

“Mr Jeong, we should go now if we don’t want to be stranded somewhere on the road during the storm.” He must be the doctor’s driver, then. My mother appeared behind the driver, looking as worried as if the doctor was her own child.

“We have guest rooms, Doctor, you could always stay.” My mother was a kind and loving woman, her intentions hardly questionable, “I would hate it if something were to happen to you.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Harold, but I shall be on my way.” Doctor Jeong smiled widely, then faced me once again, and bowed his head much like yesterday. Perhaps it was their custom to take farewell like that, so, I bowed back to him. The doctor’s eyes widened for a second before his smile widened just slightly, and then he and his diver were gone, my mother’s expression was worried as she watched them leave from the front porch. Big droplets of water started falling from the dark clouds, and I quickly closed the grand doors as Matilda rushed inside to assist me. The rhythmic fall of the rain was a glaring reminder of my irregularly fast heartbeat.

The eyes were windows to one’s soul, or so Yunho had been taught. He had dealt with many cases during his practice period, and now as a certified psychiatrist, he had gained even more popularity in the West. He had no choice but to move at a young age, the world was an ever-changing place. He was young and curious, he wished to explore and find people that needed his expertise. But there was something so mesmerising about her eyes which left him unravelled and flustered like nothing else. Her words dripped with honey, and Yunho could swear he heard angels singing, accompanying her soft tone whenever she told stories. He was captivated. He ached to write down every single word she uttered, he felt desperate to pick apart her brain, to look inside it, to fix her. He was desperate to understand what had triggered her manic episode, he was desperate to tell the committee that she was innocent. But he was a doctor first and foremost, and his job forbade him from any personal attachment towards his patients. But whenever he looked into her icy blue eyes, the breeze brushing the fallen copper strands of her hair against her sun-kissed cheeks, he felt his very own soul stir and reach out in desperation to connect with hers, to possess it. She was a madwoman, and he was a man desperate to stay sane in her company.

            Another thing I completely wished to be free of was dinners, where I was forced to sit with my so-called happy family. The bags under Mr Brooks's eyes had been getting darker and darker lately, and the creases in his forehead were an obvious sign that something was worrying him. But it wasn’t my place to ask questions, so I continued to silently notice the small changes in his mood and behaviour. He had stopped pampering Karina, which was completely unheard of, and she was loud and clear with her complaints. She had wanted a silk nightgown just last week, but her father had denied her of it. He didn’t mention the cause, he only said she already has more than enough nightgowns. The clinking of silverware gave me something to focus on as my eyes were cast on the brussels sprouts on my plate, pushing around it as I didn’t enjoy their bitter taste. But Mrs Humphrey had cooked dinner with love, so I didn’t want to leave anything on my plate tonight. The silence around the table was broken as my mother grabbed her glass of wine, her kind eyes settling on me.

“Y/N, my dear, how are your examinations going?” I paused, feeling everyone’s eyes in the dining room on me. I gulped down the food I had in my mouth and tapped with a napkin at my lips, letting my hands fall in my lap as I hummed. Doctor Jeong’s words rang clearly in my mind, what we were doing was called sessions.

“They are called sessions, ‘ma, and they are going well,” I spoke gently, hoping she’d find my words reassuring. I knew she was constantly worrying about me, always fussing and around thinking I wouldn’t notice. I might be absent-minded a lot these days, but I’m mostly aware of my surroundings still. Mr Brooks nodded once, looking pleased as he wolfed down the steak Mrs Humphrey had made to be spicey, just like Mr Brooks liked it.

“That is lovely to hear,” My mother beamed at me, meanwhile Karina scoffed under her breath, “Do you find communication with the doctor difficult, perhaps? Or is everything clear between you two?”

Mr. Brooks nodded along, one eyebrow raised as he watched me curiously. I adjusted myself in my chair and plastered on a little smile, “Doctor Jeong is well-versed and rather attentive. He notes down everything I say in his notebook, and meanwhile, I have noticed he scribbles along in his mother tongue as well, I find no difficulties understanding him. He’s coherent and speaks English as if he was born around here.”

“That’s a very reassuring thing to hear, my dear.” Mr Brooks spoke up with a smile, the corners of his lips tugging up. Karina’s jawline was set tight as she let her fork clamper down loudly against her plate, her eyebrows raised mockingly.

“Why are we letting her spend time alone with that doctor, again? How is that helping her?” Her tone was high-pitched, filled with blatant jealousy that Mr Brooks and my mother remained oblivious to.

“Sweetheart, we’ve discussed this already,” Mr Brooks said with a tired sigh, giving his daughter a disapproving look, “Y/N needs a new medical approach, and Doctor Jeong is the best in this field. He came all the way here from South Korea when he was still just an apprentice. I’ve read up on him, he’s solved cases of mass hysteria and other mental issues no doctor could even come close to. Let’s not have this conversation again, Karina.”

Mr Brooks was mostly calling me insane to my face, but his words held no malice and I knew his intentions were pure. I couldn’t resent him for wanting to find a cure for me, something that could finally fix me. He had no obligation to look out for me like this, I wasn’t his daughter by blood, yet he had only treated me with kindness and understanding my whole life. He was a good man, perhaps a bit too absent from the household, but I could see in his eyes that he loved my mother dearly, and that was more than enough for me to accept him into our home. He couldn’t replace my father, but he filled the void that sometimes got too much.

“I think she just needs attention,” Karina hissed under her breath as she slammed her fist on the table, making the maids behind her jump, “What are you waiting for, stupid cunts?! My glass is empty!”

“Karina,” My mother muttered, her eyebrows pulled together as she gave her a displeased look while the poor maid scurried to fill Karina’s glass with wine, “A lady shouldn’t use such vulgar language, nonetheless in front of her elders.”

“Yeah, whatever Mrs Harold.” She scoffed as she glared at the maid, taking big gulps of her wine. I watched with distaste, catching Leia’s gaze for a split second. Her eyes were tear-filled and I bit my bottom lip to stop myself from speaking up, it would only start an argument I didn’t have the mental capacity for right now. But Karina wasn’t done as her sharp gaze fell on me, her tone harsh when she spoke again, “I know you enjoy spending time with the doctor alone, it makes you fantasize, doesn’t it? You’re just playing with him like with everyone else around you, sister, aren’t you? How long do you reckon until you get him riled up enough to get underneath your skirts—”

“Karina!” Mr Brooks's voice was loud and stern, his eyes set on his daughter with disgust in them, “How dare you say such things to your sister? In front of me and her mother, nonetheless! You should be ashamed, is this who I raised you to be?!”

Karina chuckled, humourless, “Right, father, you didn’t raise me at all, perhaps that is why I am like this. Maybe you shouldn’t have admitted mother into an asylum because she didn’t know how to silence a crying baby, hm?”

The silence that settled over the table made my skin crawl. If anyone would’ve dropped a pin, everyone could’ve heard it in the dining room. I released a shaky breath, the tremors worsening as Mr Brooks seemed to be struggling with containing his rage in front of my mother. Her mouth was open and a hand pressed against it, eyes shaking with pain and incredulity as she looked between Karina and her second husband. I took a deep breath and pushed my chair back, grabbing my plate to try and stabilise myself, to stay in the present. Eyes fell on me, and before Leia could come to approach me, I shook my head with a small smile, “I’ll let Mrs Humphrey know she outdid herself once again, then I will be retreating for bed. Matilda will accompany me, sleep well tonight, mother.”

As I left the dining room, I heard Mr Brooks weakly whisper a good night, then Karina’s sobs as she raced up the stairs, slamming the door to her room loudly. The chatter and good mood died down the second the kitchen door swung open, Leia following inside after me. Mrs Humphrey looked concerned when she noticed me holding my plate and went to stand up and take it from me, but I quickly shook my head.

“No, stay seated, Mrs Humphrey, dinner is absolutely delicious.” I said with a smile, and the other servants and maids seemed to relax as well, “Would you mind…if I finished my dinner here, with you?”

“Oh, come here, my dear.” Mrs Humphrey’s frown was deep as she beckoned me over, making space for me between herself and our butler, Jesper. He was still a young boy, his eyes filled with a youthful spark, full of life and happiness. He offered me a small smile and placed mushrooms filled with cheese on my plate, knowing I loved them. I chuckled and thanked him, then looked over the table and realised I felt most comfortable when around these people. They were simple, they were happy, and they made the most of their days. They were free, away from society’s judgemental eyes, and they lacked the prejudice the other aristocrats hadn’t even tried to hide around me. I felt like I belonged at this table, and as the happy chatter picked up again and Jesper made small talk with me, with Carla eagerly interjecting sometimes, I could feel my tense muscles relax and the void in my chest disappear. For a little while only, while I was still at this table, enjoying my dinner with the people who looked at me as if I was just a human too.

            The doctor was quickly growing on me. I couldn’t trust him, not yet, it would be too soon. It’s been only a week since he started visiting me for our sessions, but I started believing that he wasn’t playing a character when around me. He was genuine, his eyes sparkled curiously with each question he asked, his frown was always worried and it downturned his pretty pouty lips, and when he smiled, something warm seemed to flood my chest. I could only compare it to the sun, for I have never felt such warmth when gazing upon a man before. Not even when suitors were lining up in front of our house, asking for a chance at marrying me. The doctor was considerate and kind, he hung on to my every word. It was his profession, I knew he was only doing his job, but I couldn’t help but imagine he was a man interested in me, his notebooks filled with poems and sketches of me. It was a far-fetched fantasy, but it managed to warm my cheeks anytime I dwelled on it.

I was out in the back garden as I found myself thinking about the doctor again, excited to see him today as well. We had left off at a rather culminating point of my story yesterday, I wondered if he was as eager as I was to hear the rest of it. Matilda wasn’t feeling well today, and as my mother was in town, Carla was the one supervising me. I didn’t mind the change, she was a chatty girl and easily kept me from detaching from reality. Here, in the garden, as I thumbed at the leaves of the flowers, Carla was still speaking about an encounter with a fairy. A supposed fairy as she believed in God and deemed the little creatures spawns of evil.

“Tell me, young miss, do you believe it was Satan sending those fairies my way?” Carla’s voice was full of wonder, “Have I done something bad to attract his attention to me?”

“I don’t believe so, Carla.” I answered her quietly, my eyes following a bee as it flew from flower to flower, “You go to church every Sunday.”

“Perhaps I should go from now on every Wednesday and Sunday, too.” Carla huffed, hands on her hips as she tried avoiding the bee that was flying towards her. I chuckled, straightening up. The scent of the hydrangeas was familiar as I closed my eyes, inhaling it deeply into my lungs so that they would stay there for a long time.

“I don’t believe fairies are inherently evil, Carla.” I mused as the breeze brushed upon my cheeks, already flushed from the great heat. My dress was thin and simple, I couldn’t wear pompous dresses during summertime, they were too hot. I would often feel lightheaded from the strong sun, the thick dresses would only make me faint. The white fabric was soft against my skin, and the white ribbons brushed against my nape as my hair was pulled into two small buns at the base of my neck. I could’ve performed on stage looking like this, but even so much as looking at my pointe shoes would’ve hurt my soul. I didn’t let the memories resurface despite the sudden melancholia that wished to break through my emotions, “Fairies are small creatures that protect nature, maybe you had done something they didn’t approve of. Did you disrespect their land, perhaps? Or did you step on a flower they had blessed before? Fairies are territorial beings, and they are also quite vengeful. But if you ask Father Leon to bless you after service, I’m sure you’ll be just fine, Carla.”

The scoff that followed my words wasn’t coming from Carla. I didn’t open my eyes as I became aware of heavier footsteps approaching, I had completely missed the engine of his motorcar. I felt Karina stop behind me, but I turned my head towards the sun, basking in it. I couldn’t touch the celestial without burning to a crisp, but perhaps the one it had sent to me in human form was really here to save me. A clear of throat made me blink my eyes open, and I turned to look over my shoulder.

“If you have nothing else but fairies to talk about, then I don’t see why Doctor Jeong should entertain your madness any longer.” Karina’s eyes narrowed at me, “You belong in an asylum, sister.”

I smiled, a little amused, as an ugly grimace appeared on Carla’s face upon Karina’s comment. The maid made to open her mouth, which would’ve landed her in trouble, but the doctor beat her to it, “Thank you for walking me here, Miss Brooks. But I’d like to be left alone with Miss Harold, now.”

“Right,” Karina muttered, shooting me a jealous stare, “She gets to have you all to herself, as always.”

Then, she turned around and raised her skirt above her ankles to storm off. Carla nodded her head and followed after Karina, not in a hurry so that the woman wouldn’t pick a fight with Carla as well. The doctor sighed, pushing his small glasses up the bridge of his nose, looking a little bit bewildered. Then, he looked at me and the crease from his forehead disappeared. I was already smiling at him, my hands behind my back to hide the bad tremors. I had felt faint all day, but the doctor was here finally and I could finally take my first breath of fresh air of the day. I couldn’t help but smile widely at him, and watch as the flush from his ears quickly travelled down to his chest. Even more buttons of his loose white shirt were undone, the silver cross sitting against his chest now glinting under the sunlight. His trousers were high-waisted and the shirt was tucked neatly into it, a leather belt pulled around his waist. And there, in his right hand, was something white. I tilted my head in wonder as I looked at it, curious about what it was. The doctor liked bringing small gifts, mostly silly, but memorable.

“Hello, Doctor Jeong,” I spoke up, and the doctor released a loud breath.

“Hello, Miss Harold.” His voice shook slightly, then his fingers tightened around the strap of his satchel bag, “Here, I have something for you.”

Then he extended his right hand out towards me, and my eyes widened in surprise. I could tell the ballerina was made out of a napkin, I hadn’t seen anything like it before. My hands shook despite trying to ease the tremors, and my fingers hesitantly curled around the present as our skin brushed together. The doctor’s cheeks flushed rapidly, and I found myself unable to look into his warm eyes. I wondered if it was the heat that made our hands so clammy. I looked at the ballerina in my hands, melancholy overtaking me once again. I longed to dance around in the garden, Mrs Humphrey and my mother as my audience now that my father was gone, but it only brought back bad memories. I was too faint to twirl around now, my legs weren’t as strong as they once used to be. I would fall even before doing my first pirouette, it was depressing.

“How are you feeling today, Miss Harold?”

“Faint, but it’s from the heat, Doctor Jeong.”

We stood unmoving, our eyes boring into each other’s. I didn’t want to move to the tea room just yet, perhaps I longed to sit under the willow tree. The doctor made no moves, and so I said nothing about heading for the house. We were in eyesight if anyone were to look through the kitchen window, and we weren’t doing anything wrong.

“Thank you for the gift, Doctor Jeong, did you make it yourself?” I asked with round eyes, unable to keep the smile off my lips. The doctor flushed darker and averted his eyes, thumbing at his wet bottom lip.

“Yes, I thought it would cheer you up. I hope I wasn’t wrong.” His tone was tender and just a little hesitant, the doctor was almost cute like this.

“It did cheer me up, sir, I was thinking about ballet just now.” I paused, and waited for the doctor to look up into my eyes, “It seems you can already read my mind, I wonder how you do that.”

The doctor smiled, his forehead exposed as his dark strands were brushed away from his eyes, “We are making progress, then, reading your mind isn’t as easy as one might think.”

“And why is that?” I asked curiously, fiddling with the napkin in my hands.

“Because it’s very complex, you like to speak in riddles, and you evade most of my questions.” Then the doctor chuckled and I bit my bottom lip, averting my eyes in embarrassment, “You’re cunning, but I’m good at catching all the little hidden messages.”

I grinned at the doctor’s words, my suspicions confirmed. I knew I could play around with him, he seemed like a very smart man. Hearing he could read between the lines was more than satisfying. My heart skipped a beat, but it didn’t start racing like before.

“Do you like hydrangeas, Doctor?”

“Their scent is too intense for my liking, but they are pretty flowers, Miss Harold.”

“They symbolise purity and gratitude, even vanity in some cases.”

“What do they mean in your case, then?”

“Gratitude, Doctor Jeong, towards you.” Our eyes met again as I looked away from the white flowers, a sudden calmness settling upon my racing thoughts, “I hope the end of my story will be satisfying to you.”

The doctor gulped, loudly, then motioned towards the house, “Would you like to continue inside? Did you remember something of importance, perhaps?”

“Can we sit under the willow tree?” I raised an eyebrow, “Mrs Humphrey can see us from the kitchen if that’s of worry to you.”

“Sure, if you’ll feel comfortable.” The doctor nodded, fishing for his notebook and pencil as I hummed, leading us down the pebbled path, the willow tree was just by the end of it. The territory the house resided on came with a small pond, I liked watching the still water while sitting by the trunk of the willow tree. The doctor followed after me quietly, and he watched me settle down into the green grass, dress splaying out around me. It had ridden slightly up, exposing my shins as I pulled them underneath myself. The doctor seemed to be frozen, eyes glued to where my legs had been just seconds ago. Then, he gulped loudly and settled down next to me. He sat a little closer compared to the usual distance between our chairs, but his presence was soothing. I smiled as I faced him, eyes falling on his long fingers as he got comfortable, opening his notebook to where we had left off yesterday.

“I don’t remember anything new, doctor, but we haven’t reached that part of the story yet.” I smiled, then turned my head to gaze out at the pond, “Would you like to hear what happens next?”

The doctor exhaled, “You told me this noble boy barged inside your house in the middle of the night? He must’ve been madly in love with you to do such a thing.”

I chuckled, eyes focusing on the dragonflies above the pond, “I suppose he was at one point, yes. But men are easily converted, I find love like my mother and father had once shared hard to find, doctor. Our love didn’t last long, but I’m getting ahead of myself. It was a cold spring evening and he had been visiting, drinking with Mr Brooks to ask for permission to marry me. My mother was present too, of course, but she couldn’t say much against Mr Brook’s words. In the end, the proposal was accepted and the man left, only to come barging inside hours later.”

“Why did he do that?”

“Because he was drunk, and because he had something to say.”

“Did you hear him out?”

I chuckled, facing the doctor. His eyes were wide as he was watching me, pencil pressing against the white paper, “Yes, I did hear him out, but his words made no sense. He said something about a lavished lifestyle and a farmhouse, and something about being happy together even in a later age, it was endearing but very inadequate.”

“So, what did you do, then?” The doctor wasn’t even writing down what I was saying, it made me chuckle. The corner of his lips lifted subconsciously, he looked amused too.

“Nothing, I just kicked him out and told him to come back when he’s sober. His drunken words meant nothing to me. I did not want to marry a man who made foolish confessions in an inebriated state of mind, besides, he was a gentleman. He should have known better than to barge inside a lady’s home well past midnight, no, Doctor Jeong?” I quirked an eyebrow, my question seemed to snap the doctor out of his staring. He cleared his throat and looked down at his notebook, pausing for a few seconds before he jotted something down. I couldn’t read it, it was in a foreign language.

“N-no—I mean, yes, Miss Harold. That was rather inappropriate of him, I must imagine the discomfort he had created for you.” He had barely finished his sentence when a giggle bubbled past my lips.

“On the contrary, Doctor Jeong.” I grinned, ducking my head down to hide my amusement as confusion crossed the doctor’s features, “It was the most fun I’ve had in a while. Mrs Humphrey, my mother, and I had stayed up for hours giggling about it afterwards. We even made jokes about it and Mrs Humphrey let us drink her very secret brew that tastes like flowers but could knock out even a sailor with just two jugs. I have no idea what it is, but it’s very strong.”

The doctor’s eyes were filled with awe as I laughed, memories of easier times never failing to bring me in a good mood. It would’ve been easier like this, if things stayed put and if Karina wouldn’t have meddled with everything. I have faced hardships before, but having the person I considered my sister to betray me had stung like none other. In the end, neither one of us got what we wanted, just a lot of animosity and a tension-filled relationship. Sometimes I wanted to ask Karina if all of it was worth it, but I knew not to entertain an already greedy person.

“And how does this memory make you feel now?” Doctor Jeong’s tone was airy, and he wasn’t looking at me as he was scribbling in his notebook. I pondered for a second before I placed my hands on the grass, gripping it tightly between my fingers. Sometimes the tremors stopped when I grabbed something too hard.

“Bittersweet, but mostly happy. I’m grateful I was able to experience all of that at least once in my lifetime, others aren’t as lucky as I am. I am well aware of that.” The doctor nodded along as I spoke, but then he paused writing and looked at me with a frown.

“And when you think of that man? How does he make you feel, Miss Harold?” I gulped, not having expected that question. But it was easy to answer, I’ve pondered many times over this specific question, there wasn’t anything the doctor could surprise me with anymore. I smiled softly but knew the doctor could feel the shift in my mood.

“Mostly angry that I wasted years on that man when I could’ve found someone more decent, more loving.” Then I shrugged and watched as the doctor licked his lips, adjusting his spectacles on his nose, “Do you believe that God has everything planned for us, Doctor?”

“Mostly, yes, but we have enough free will to change the direction of our lives.” The doctor answered, his eyebrows furrowed in thought. I hummed, plucking the grass from the ground forcefully. My knuckles ached from how hard I had gripped onto it.

“You can’t run from what is meant for you, Doctor Jeong, we would’ve never met if I wouldn’t have gone mad.” But Doctor Jeong didn’t seem to be too convinced by my words. He chewed on his bottom lip, sweat rolling down between his pecks. I gulped, then averted my eyes from his exposed fair skin, and instead focused on his beautiful round brown eyes, “Are you glad we got to meet?”

The man’s eyes widened at my forward question, but I meant no harm nor did I have questionable reasons to ask such a thing. The doctor cleared his throat, playing with the pencil in his hands as he thought his answer over, “I’ll be glad once you are back to being yourself, until then, I cannot allow myself to feel any sort of satisfaction.”

“Don’t you think my madness is part of me, now?” I muttered, gazing off towards the house. The curtain in the kitchen moved, but I knew it wasn’t Mrs Humphrey. She was out in town with my mother at this hour. Doctor Jeong inhaled sharply, then closed his notebook loudly. The paper made a noisy sound, making me look over to him. The man looked aggravated as if my question had bothered him immensely, but I was merely curious about how he viewed me.

“Perhaps we should continue tomorrow, Miss Harold, and we must proceed with the story. The committee is pressing me with questions, they are very curious to hear the full story.” The doctor was avoiding my question, that was unusual. He stood, brushed the dirt off his trousers, then hastily grabbed his satchel bag and clumsily placed the notebook and his pencil inside.

“Thank you for indulging with me, Doctor Jeong.” I looked up at him, and had to shield my eyes from the sun, “I love sitting under the willow tree.”

“I will keep that in mind, Miss Harold, have a nice afternoon.” The doctor then bowed his head and I mirrored his actions, then he was rushing back towards the house, looking a little rigid. Karina stood in the doorway to the tea room, a tray filled with cookies and lemonade in her hands, but Doctor Jeong merely nodded at her and left the house in haste. Karina’s glare could be felt even from the distance, and I gently stood to head back inside, keeping the arrangement in mind. I wasn’t supposed to be unsupervised, I knew Carla would be in the laundry room if she had nothing else to do.

Yunho couldn’t sleep. He kept reading over and over his notes, all the small hidden messages making his head ache. His stomach growled in hunger, but he was physically unable to stand from his study and ask the housekeeper to prepare dinner for him. The girl was frail, she was soft-spoken but witty. She liked to keep him on his toes, and she was great at making him lose track of what was most important. He felt like he was making no progress, yet the committee kept pressing him for an answer. Father Louis was understanding enough not to ambush him with questions daily, but the rest of the officials weren’t. They wanted a diagnosis of Miss Harold already, they didn’t want to understand that Yunho couldn’t give his verdict in anything but a week. Building trust took time, getting to hear the unfiltered truth from someone who loved to play with her words took patience. Yunho was a patient person, but he wondered how long he had until he’d break. Whenever he closed his eyes, he felt as if she was watching him, standing over him, smiling at him. Her skin was sun-kissed and sometimes her cheeks were burnt from staying out in the sun for too long, but Yunho knew her skin would be soft. When he had twisted and turned his napkin into shapes, absentmindedly, he realised he had made a ballerina out of it. Thus, he had made his first mistake as a professional. He had allowed himself to sympathise with Miss Harold. He had allowed himself to notice her smile was brighter than the sun itself, and that she smelled an awful lot like those hydrangeas that Yunho was allergic to. And he had allowed himself to notice the tremors of her hands, making him yearn to hold her frail hands between his with the hopes of soothing her nerves. Yunho wondered if she yearned for him like she had yearned for her once lover.

            The clouds were almost black as they expanded over the horizon. The wind was too cold for us to keep the grand doors of the tea room open, so they remained closed as I sat on the soft sofa, gazing out through the glass. Matilda had left the curtains undrawn for me, and a few scented candles were lit to ease my muscles' tension. I couldn’t focus lately, these past three days my mood had quickly reclined. I know the doctor had noticed it too, but he didn’t prod more than it would be considered rude. I was reluctant to tell him the cause of my moroseness, he wasn’t here to listen to me weep about how unfairly Karina treated me. She had been ruthless these past three days. I knew she had a vendetta against me, but ever since the doctor started coming here, she had been progressively getting worse and worse. I could handle it until I couldn’t. If I ignored her and got lost in a deep spot in the back of my mind filled with happy memories, I would end up with a backhanded slap to my face. If I talked back and stood my ground, I would only fuel her fire, giving her power over me. Karina was clever, she knew when to strike. If my mother was around us, she was an angel. If the servants were watching, she’d be sharp and arrogant towards me. If Mr. Brooks was present, she didn’t bother hiding her disdain, but she wasn’t as straightforward as around the servants.

She didn’t hold back one bit if it was just the two of us. My eyes were lost on the gloomy visage, eyes tracking the swaying vines of the willow tree. It was even more beautiful in the eyes of the storm, I could’ve stared at it for hours on end. My mind was silent like this, absent of all the turbulent thoughts that shook me to my core and kept me up at night, when Matilda, poor girl, struggled to stay up and look over me. Just last night, she had fallen asleep, and I was grateful because I had a moment to myself where I could secretly slip away and walk through the gardens in hopes of clearing my mind. It wasn’t a smart decision, however, because I couldn’t remember anything after I stepped through the threshold of the house. I just know sometime later I was gasping for air as my arms were restricted and my throat was scratchy, Mr Brooks desperately trying to hold down my trashing body. My white nightgown was dirty with mud and the ends of it were dripping wet with pond water. It wasn’t foreign that I would lose consciousness if something lay heavily on my chest and gnawed at my thoughts, but it had been long since I had lost track of myself so deeply. Not since the incident, at least.

And Karina was enjoying it, her lips pulled into a nasty smirk as my mother cried by my side, asking Matilda and Leia to bring cold towels and help me clean up. Mr Brooks had looked tired as he gently helped me back to my room and tucked me into bed, his eyes pained and suffering as if I was blood-related to him. His expression made me feel guilty for worrying not just my mother, but also him. I felt terrible, yet I couldn’t control my mind or my body when these episodes happened. Even now, as I sat on the sofa waiting for the doctor to arrive, I felt lightheaded and on the brink of losing consciousness. My body felt light and heavy simultaneously, and I could feel my pulse in my neck. My lips felt chapped no matter how much tea I drank, and my throat was tight. I wanted to see the doctor, I needed to tell him why I had done what I had done. I had always been too afraid to confess the truth, not wanting to hurt my mother and break up the second family she cherished. But I also couldn’t continue living like this, not when Karina prayed for my downfall. Her harsh words from yesterday were still fresh in my mind, and I had to blink the tears away for a second.

“I know you’re just a whore, desperate to find another man to toy with.” She had spat with flushed cheeks, a cup filled halfway with wine in her hand, “Do you seriously think that doctor wants to touch you? You’re a deranged woman now, Y/N, nobody will want you. Not even Doctor Jeong Yunho, you whore. I won’t let you have him too, you always get what you want—but not this time, Y/N, mark my words.”

And just when I had thought she was done, she had marched up to me and grabbed me by the throat harshly, making me gasp, “If he doesn’t send you to an asylum, I will kill you myself, Y/N. You’re an abomination and a disgrace, even your own mother hates you, whore.”

The knock at the door startled me, I had been lost deep in thought. I turned my head and noticed Matilda giving me a small smile, “Young miss, the doctor is here to see you. Would you like me to prepare anything for you two?”

My heart skipped a beat, but I couldn’t tell why. Perhaps because I knew he’d take my mind off things, even if I was forced to relive the past I tried to bury deep down, sequences I couldn’t even remember anymore. Or, maybe, it was because I desperately wished to gaze upon his soft face, lose myself in his warm and round eyes peeking at me over his small spectacles. I couldn’t decide which was the reason, but I needed his presence to calm my turbulent mind and body finally.

“Thank you. I will welcome him inside, and you can take a break.” I stood up, hands balling into fists as nausea washed over me, “We won’t need anything, but I hope you get some sleep, Matilda. You’ve been watching over me for three days.”

“That is my duty, young miss.” Then she bowed her head before I could tell her she needed to take care of herself, and she took her leave. I smoothed down my long-sleeved dark blue dress now that the weather wasn’t as warm as days ago. I hadn’t pulled my hair into a bun today, even if it was not ladylike, I wished to feel my copper strands brushing against my cheeks when I moved my head. It shielded my face like a curtain if I didn’t want to be seen, I hoped Doctor Jeong wouldn’t mind.

Sucking in a deep breath and bracing myself, I left the tea room in search of the doctor, who should have been in the foyer, getting rid of his coat and dress shoes, but instead, he wasn’t there. I paused for a second to listen for his voice, and a smile pulled at my lips when I realised he was in the living room. Perhaps we could hold our session inside there today, I could play the piano and show him my favourite piece, if that, of course, was deemed fine by the doctor. As my fingers brushed against the wooden door, about to push it further open, I realised the doctor wasn’t alone. Karina’s sweet giggles flooded the room before she continued speaking.

“Surely, Doctor. I am pleased to hear you do not burn yourself out by coming here daily. I can only imagine how tiring it must be to listen to my sister, she’s rarely coherent. You must have noticed, given that you are a doctor, that she often has no idea where she is or who she is talking to. She tends to get lost in her own mind and blabber on about nonsense.” Karina then paused as my heart raced, my eyebrows furrowed in distaste, “She looks completely normal upon first glance, but it quickly becomes obvious she’s—well, she’s insane, you know?”

“I’m sorry, Miss Brooks, I cannot be discussing this with you.” Doctor Jeong’s voice was neutral, and cold, unlike the tone he used with me, “But as a licensed doctor, given that I am one, I can tell when her surroundings influence her mood, or why she is in a bad headspace.”

Karina scoffed, sounding a little offended, “Are you insinuating anything right now, Doctor Jeong? I don’t need a license to be able to tell that my sister is insane. How long until you realise she’s just trying to trap you here, twirl you up into her web of lies and fantasies? If you think you can help a mad person, Doctor, I fear you should seek help too. She’s beyond help, she’s desperate and pathetic, and as I have stated, she’s mad—”

“I am not mad!” Before I could stop myself, I let my anger take over me as I barged through the ajar room, “I am not insane, Karina, you’re always putting words in my mouth! Who has ruined everything I have ever had, huh?! You, you did, so don’t call me your sister. I am not your sister, and I will never be, you filthy skank!”

Karina gasped loudly, her hand flying up to her mouth. The doctor’s eyes had widened too, clearly taken aback by my outburst. I had been soft-spoken and kind in front of him, careful to not show anything he could incriminate me with in front of the committee. Karina had gotten what she wanted all this time, I suppose. Now, the doctor would make an early report that wasn’t favourable for me without even hearing the truth, or as much as I could remember of it. I gulped, feeling ashamed as tears filled my eyes, but I tried to keep myself from crying. Karina wailing like a banshee next to Doctor Jeong was more than humiliating enough to force me to keep myself in place.

“Enough,” The doctor snapped, his friendly and soft features morphing into something of anger and vexation. For a second, I thought it was directed towards me, but then he turned his head and his warm chocolate brown eyes fell on Karina, now sharp, “This is the last time I let you off the hook, Miss Brooks. If you don’t stop treating your sister so poorly, I will have to write you up on the board as the main suspect that causes Miss Harold’s turbulent manic episodes to occur, is that what you want? Do you wish to also be psychologically evaluated? I can do that, I can get one of my colleagues to come out here and question you, but you might be surprised to find yourself deemed insane too.”

Doctor Jeong’s words visibly shook Karina as she crumbled into an armchair, fingers sinking into her hair as she shook her head at the doctor, crocodile tears streaming down her cheeks pathetically. My heart was racing in my chest, the doctor was all I could see. His flushed cheeks from anger, his whitening knuckles around the strap of his satchel bag, his rapidly rising and falling chest—Jeong Yunho had stood up for me, taken my side. He was my doctor, he was supposed to look out for me, but he wasn’t obligated to protect me from claims that might be true. I didn’t feel insane, I never had, but Karina might still be right. Maybe I was a danger to society and Doctor Jeong hadn’t discovered why yet. It was only a matter of time until I exploded in his face, showing him my true colours. I had no idea what I was fully capable of, that part of my memory was still absent, but I could never forget the feeling of pure satisfaction and elation as I watched Karina lay on her back, gasping for air as blood trailed from her nose down to her mouth, chin, and then neck.

Doctor Jeong sighed loudly, his eyebrows furrowed as he licked his lips, shaking his head in almost disappointment at Karina. Then, he faced me and his features instantly softened. My heart raced again, and I hid my hands behind my back. Then, without many words, he came closer to me and nodded with his chin towards the stairs, “Would you mind if we skipped the tea room today, I’d like a more private setting.”

I gulped, feeling lightheaded once again, “No, the storm ruins the pretty visage either way.”

The doctor hummed as I turned around and took off towards the stairs, his strong footsteps loud behind me. My hands trembled as we ascended the creaky old stairs, my fingertips tracing the old railing. Doctor Jeong’s fingers were close to mine, tracing the same pattern as mine, so close yet so far away at the same time. I exhaled softly and tried to keep a clear head, but my nausea was getting worse as I led the way to my bedroom. My mother would’ve been outraged by the idea of leading a man inside my room, but this was the doctor, he was here to help. I couldn’t think of a more private room than my own bedroom, the heavy door closed and locked once we were inside. The doctor seemed to tense when he heard the lock, his back to me. I felt exposed, a little naked, now that the man was in my intimate space. There wasn’t much to my room except for a desk filled with books and poorly done sketches, and a vase filled with daisies and tulips. The doctor headed for my desk, meanwhile, I headed for my bed. The sheets were satin and silky as I lowered myself onto the edge of my bed, letting my hands sink into the fabric. With a questioning glance, the doctor turned my chair around to face me and sunk into it with a heavy sigh.

“I apologise.” My eyebrows rose in surprise as I tilted my head in question, “For letting your sister speak like that of you, I should have never let her go that far. I shouldn’t have even let her corner me like that and-and—it doesn’t matter. I understand if you need space after this, I might be able to convince the committee to give me a few more weeks.”

“She’s not my sister.” I whispered as I wrung my trembling fingers together, looking down in my lap, “Karina is not my blood sister, Doctor Jeong. I might have viewed her once as a sister, but not anymore.”

The doctor fumbled around for his notebook and pencil, which had gotten smaller from having sharpened it so often. The doctor’s eyebrows were furrowed as he pushed the spectacles up on the bridge of his perfect nose.

“Does this have to do anything with what happened on that day?” The doctor’s voice was gentle, understanding even. I bit my lower lip and nodded slowly, feeling my head swarm around uncontrollably. Would he know what to do with me if I were to pass out? He is a doctor, after all, but Matilda is the one who knows me best, perhaps I shouldn’t have locked the door.

“She-she really—hurt me that day, and I—” My throat felt dry as my lungs started heaving for air, “I don’t know—maybe I did want her to di-die—I can’t do this right now, Doctor Jeong, I’m sorry.”

Doctor Jeong’s bottom lip was between his teeth as he suddenly let his notebook rest on the desk behind him. He leaned forward, lowering his head as he tried to make eye contact with me. I gulped and kept my gaze focused on my tremor-ridden hands, “Listen to me, Miss Harold, we don’t have to talk about it today. I’m just here to chat, I can tell you are not feeling well. Your mother informed me through a letter that you had hurt yourself last night, may I know what happened? Can you tell me? I won’t even take notes, just this one time.”

I gulped, slowly raising my eyes to look up at the doctor. He wore a tight beige shirt today with a dark blue vest over it, his pants snugly fitting his long legs. The sleeves of his shirt were rolled up to his elbows, showcasing his fair and smooth skin, veins bulging through. The wristwatch on his left hand looked fancy, the leather a very dark blue to match his vest. Doctor Jeong’s dark hair was swept back once again, but it looked fluffier today. I itched to reach out and run my fingers through his hair, wanting to feel its softness for myself. I tensed my muscles before I could do anything stupid like that. The doctor’s cheeks were slightly flushed, and his tooth was leaving a small white dent in his bottom lip. Because he was leaning forward, there was less distance between us, but still respectable. Like between doctor and patient.

“I—” I chewed on my bottom lip before taking a deep breath, “I haven’t been feeling well lately, Doctor, so I couldn’t sleep last night. I went for a walk and…I don’t remember what I did or what happened. Sometimes I lose consciousness while I’m awake, it’s frightening. I woke up with a muddied nightgown and a cut on my arm, Matilda had patched me up though.”

“How often does this happen?”

“Not that often.”

“Do you have an idea what may cause it?

“Well, yes. I think it’s Karina, she’s been antagonising me for the past three days and I’m so tired of it all. I just disassociate when I see her approaching me now, I’m sorry.”

The doctor sighed, rubbing his bottom lip with his thumb. His spectacles had slipped lower once again, “Do not apologise, you haven’t done anything wrong. I’m just glad you’re alright, Miss Harold.”

“The thought of you visiting daily keeps me afloat, Doctor Jeong, I have something to look forward to now.” I smiled, widely, and the doctor’s eyes widened before he blinked rapidly, looking stunned. Afraid the moment of lightness would pass by before I could grasp it, I continued, “Would you mind telling me your story today? What it’s like where you are from? How you were as a child? Is that…is that unprofessional? Are we not allowed to speak about you, Doctor?”

Doctor Jeong’s gulp was loud, then he took a deep breath and slowly leaned back in his chair, his legs spreading wide. He looked conflicted for just one second, but upon a glance at my face, he gave in. I couldn’t help but beam at the doctor as he chuckled, taking his spectacles off to place them on the desk behind himself.

“Where should I even start?” He hummed, looking towards the window, lost in thought. He was gorgeous, and he was kind. I hadn’t met a man like him before, I wished to trace my fingers along his jawline, but Karina was right. I couldn’t be a whore, not with this man, “As a child I was energetic and always blabbering on about whatever was inside my mind. I liked to ask a lot of questions, but I was reprimanded often for being too curious. Life is…different in South Korea at this time, very much different compared to how things run here. I am lucky I managed to sail so far away, my family has made great sacrifices for me to end up here. I’m not even able to send them often letters, it’s too risky.”

“Why?”

“Because they are in hiding, our belief in God is frowned upon, Catholics aren’t safe there now.” To prove a point, Doctor Jeong grabbed the silver cross underneath his shirt and brought it forward, clutching it tightly in his hands, “I can bravely say it here despite the other religions that exist, nobody has tried to murder me for it, so far. Besides, I cannot tell whether they still live where we did before I managed to sneak onto a French ship and escape. The elite class isn’t like the one here, it’s falling apart and I cannot be sure that my family are still part of it today.”

My eyebrows furrowed as an ashen look crossed the doctor’s face, “Do you miss your home?”

“Yes and no,” The doctor answered truthfully, “I was young when I sailed here, I had nothing and no one until my foster father found me. He was a Dutchman, very kind but unforgiving. I got lucky because he was a doctor and I came here to study advanced medicine with the hopes of once returning home and spreading the word, but I cannot go back, not yet. They’d shun me away, shame me and possibly kill me. South Korea isn’t welcoming of strangers yet, and in their eyes, I’d be one too for leaving our homeland only to return with new doctrines. Even if it means saving hundreds of lives. Not that I work with the physical body, but everyone needs someone who can soothe their soul once in a while.”

“You’re beyond courageous, Doctor Jeong, I admire you.” I sounded breathless as I closely listened to the doctor, making sure no word he uttered slipped by my ears. I wanted to know more about him, who he was and why he chose to be here. I couldn’t imagine being on my own, out on the streets, away from my mother, “I promise not to waste your time here, I’m almost at the end of my story.”

“I know, Miss Harold,” Doctor Jeong smiled softly, “Rather an acquittance than your doctor, I’d like to tell you that I look forward to our sessions. You are easy to connect with, and you don’t make it hard for me to glimpse inside your mind. I cannot say I understand each choice you’ve made, but that’s the beauty of having free will and individual thoughts, it sets us apart and makes us unique.”

I couldn’t help but blush as I averted my gaze from his intense one, feeling shy all of a sudden. The doctor wasn’t calling me specifically unique, but the implication was there, and I couldn’t help myself but imagine, “What about your home? What was that like, Doctor Jeong? And your family?”

For a second, he was silent. It made me think I had offended him in some way, but then his eyebrows slightly furrowed and he looked serious, “Since I am not talking to you as your doctor, you should just call me Yunho, if I may…Y/N?”

Hearing my name fall from his lips had my heart racing and my breath shuddering. I gulped, feeling speechless for a second as my eyes bore into Doctor Jeong’s, wondering if the man knew what it meant to drop such drastic formalities. But I obliged because I wanted his name to roll off my own lips like mine had done on his, desperate to fortify this frail bond between the two of us, doctor and patient, “Right, of course…Yunho.”

Doctor Jeong’s eyes fluttered shut for a second, his gulp was loud. I watched redness coat his ears down to his neck, his fingers digging into the wooden armrests. He was still wearing the silver band around his middle finger, I wondered whose it was. Was it from someone back home? Or was it from his foster father?

“Right, Y/N, well my home certainly was smaller than your house, and also built with different architecture in mind. And people don’t wear these fancy suits at home, we have our own traditional clothes that we proudly wear. I still have the one I arrived in tucked away as a means to never forget where I come from.” Doctor Jeong—Yunho—smiled softly, eyes glazed over with memories as he spoke quietly, almost as if to himself, “I have a younger brother, he’s the loveliest. I didn’t want to leave him home, not even my father and mother, but we would’ve been discovered if we were to run away together. My mother sent me off sobbing, clutching me to her chest and wondering if we’d see each other ever again. My father was a stoic man, but he had cried too. He had enough faith in me and God to know I’d make it out alive and become what they sent me away for. I left a dear friend behind too, but he promised to follow me one day. I do not know if we’ll see each other, perhaps he’s wandering around on a completely different continent, but at least I have something of his with me.”

My eyes flickered towards the silver band Yunho was absentmindedly playing with, his lips set in a tight line. So, the ring was from someone he dearly loved and cherished, I wished I could reach out and pat his hand to offer him comfort. But Yunho’s solemn look switched into one of contentment as he looked at me again, “Our house was in a lovely neighbourhood, filled with silence and the chirping of birds each early morning. Our servants were few, so they lived with us, and they had quickly become part of the family too. I would play in the dirt with my brother when our mother was busy in the kitchen, overlooking the cooks while also helping out. Our father worked long hours but he always returned with fresh flowers for my mother and some sort of western delicacy nobody was allowed to know about. I would often take walks on the beach, if there’s anything I miss terribly, it’s the wide sea and the calmness it brought with itself.”

“I love sailing,” I muttered, tucking my hands underneath my thighs as I hummed, “Despite what’s happened to my father, I find solace in the sea. It silences my fears, much like taking walks in the garden does. I feel like I belong to nature, that I can easily become one with it.”

“Nature is a beautiful place,” Yunho hummed, swiping his thumb against his bottom lip, watching me closely, “You’d love exploring the world.”

I chuckled sadly, “I would, Yunho, but I’m forced to rot away in this house under the very eyes of my servants and family. I can’t even be left alone here, sometimes I want it all to stop. Tell me, have you travelled a lot?”

Yunho looked abashed as he shrugged one shoulder, “Enough to see all sorts of places, people, and cases. Not each one had a happy ending, but I had learned something from each of them, so it was worth it in the end.”

“I wish to see the world, Yunho. I don’t want to be caged in here anymore. Could you set me free—no, will you set me free, Yunho?”

“I—I’ll try, I really will, Y/N. If you tell me the truth, I can help you and write a promising report on your case. But you have to be transparent with me for that to happen.”

“What if they don’t agree with you? See me as unstable and a danger to society, what then? Will I require a caretaker still?”

“I’m afraid, yes. Perhaps you’ll have even more severe surveillance, I’m sorry. I truly promise to do my best, but you have to trust me.”

“And what if…what if you became my caretaker?”

The silence that followed my question felt heavy, it felt wrong. I shouldn’t have asked that, but I was desperate to know how far Doctor Jeong would go to prove I wasn’t insane. And perhaps, a hidden sadistic part of me wanted to know just what exactly the doctor would do for me, to me.

“That would imply you are very unstable, I don’t think I’ve ever heard of such a thing.” Doctor Jeong breathed out, reaching for his spectacles.

“But would you become my caretaker?” I whispered, gazing up into his eyes with yearning as the doctor abruptly stood, “I wish to see the world, the places you go to. I wish to see South Korea once you’re allowed to go back, Yunho. Would you take me with you?”

He was packing his things frantically, breathing through his mouth loudly, “I cannot tell, Miss Harold, it implies great responsibility to look over someone unstable. Given if you were the object of my desires, I wouldn’t even consider becoming your caretaker, but I’m your doctor and it’s inappropriate.”

“Isn’t it only inappropriate if you make it that?” I stood, facing the doctor before he could run off. He looked conflicted and angry, so I backed off, “My apologies, I have taken you for granted and stepped over our boundaries as doctor and patient. I hope I haven’t made you too uncomfortable, Doctor Jeong, that’s not what I wished to do. I hope you can forgive me.”

“I will be back tomorrow, and you must tell me what happened, Miss Harold.” With a nod of his head, the doctor was at my door, quickly unlocking it, but he didn’t twist the knob right away. He took a deep breath and released it with a whisper, “And I would become your caretaker, if I could.”

His footsteps echoed through the house just as lightning struck in the distance. I walked to the window and watched the doctor get onto the motorcar as his butler drove away, trying to avoid the storm. And then, just like that, the world started spinning as blackness threatened to coat my vision.

            My knuckles were bloody from having picked at the skin consistently since I was awake. The tremors from my hand have extended to my whole body, my head felt underwater. I couldn’t understand what was happening around me, but I jumped each time thunder rumbled the earth. I know I had been placed on a chair in front of the window in my bedroom, Matilda sitting in the corner with my mother regularly checking on me, but I couldn’t tell what was being said to me or done around me. I didn’t have an appetite this morning, and getting out of bed was harder than ever before. I knew something was wrong, that something had disturbed my peace of mind, but I had no idea what this sudden change in my mood meant. I tried to break through the veil of haziness and speak to Matilda, tell her that my head was throbbing and my joints ached from how wrung up my body was, but my lips formed no words. I tried using the breathing technique Mrs Humphrey had once taught me, but nothing was working. I wasn’t able to control my body, and it was only making me more anxious.

The door to my room opened, but I continued to look out the window absentmindedly, bracing myself for the loud rumble when lightning struck again. After the doctor left yesterday, it hadn’t stopped raining ever since. I knew he couldn’t make it today, but he was determined enough to push through the storm and visit me. Unless it was a serious issue that needed to be urgently taken care of, the doctor never cancelled our session. The thought of seeing him when I felt so unwell managed to calm my racing heart, but until he was actually standing in front of me and I could gaze into his deep eyes, I couldn’t help but take shallow breaths as my muscles tensed up even more.

“Look at you,” It was Karina’s voice unmistakably, “trembling and sweating like a dying child, aren’t you? Who are you acting for, hm? The doctor isn’t here, Y/N, no need to act all pitiful like this, nobody in this house cares about you.”

Her voice was crystal clear for some reason, it made my ears ring as I released a shuddering breath. My mind was so askew that I couldn’t even answer her, I just needed a warm embrace and a deep voice to whisper that everything was fine. Did nobody care about me? That was so depressing, it brought tears to my eyes.

“Besides, he’s not coming today.” I failed to inhale as Karina continued to speak, “He sent a letter to your mother that he couldn’t find a carriage in time, so he isn’t coming. How tragic, all this acting only for him to not witness it…”

The sound that left my mouth was quiet, but unmistakably a whimper. Matilda shifted in her armchair and cleared her throat. I could see Karina through the reflection of the window, she was smirking maliciously as she stared at the back of my head. She looked so pleased with herself, that it made tears stream down my cheeks. I wanted to say something, but the lump in my throat was getting tighter and tighter, I realised I had stopped breathing. Why wouldn’t Yunho come? Was he like Karina too, did he not care about me? Did he lie to me yesterday? Was I worth so little that he couldn’t take on being my caretaker? Why must this be my fate? Why must I be forced never to leave this estate, this house, trapped under the eyes of people who either hate me or pity me? I wanted to sob, but the more I tried to breathe, the quicker I realised dark spots had started appearing in my vision.

“I don’t know what you two do during your little sessions, but the committee has given him one more week before he has to make his final report,” Karina chuckled, I heard her coming closer, fingers gripping the back of my chair, “And then, he’ll be all mine. I already talked to my father and he considers Doctor Jeong a nice suitor, how exciting. You can’t have him, Y/N, and he won’t have you either. I see the way you look at him, you are pathetic.”

Karina’s warm breath fanned my ear and cheek as she whispered her last words, cackling like an evil witch in all those fairytales my mother had told me about. My mouth parted to inhale deeply, but the spots grew darker, becoming more.

“Miss Brooks, please,” I heard Matilda plead as she sprung up from her seat, “Leave young miss alone, she isn’t feeling well.”

“Oh, shut up, you silly goose!” Karina snapped at Matilda, throwing her a disgusted look, “You and everyone else who feeds into her delusions should be admitted to an asylum, get a grip! She’s fine, she just needs her daily dose of attention, stupid girl.”

Hearing the word asylum cracked something further inside me as I sprung up from my seat, eyes wide and body cold. I looked at where Matilda was standing, but all I could see was the face of the man who found great pleasure in cutting me open just to leave me bleeding and helpless. A scream tried to tear through my throat, but I lost my balance as I tumbled to the floor, fingers digging into the floorboards painfully. Someone shrieked as my stomach heaved, but there was nothing to empty. I could hear the man’s words, his tone unbearable and scratchy as he told me I was worthless and a whore, hungry for male attention ever since my father had died. It made my skin crawl, it made me feel dirty and disgusting as I tried to scrape at my arms.

“Mrs Harold!” I could hear the panicked screams, but I couldn’t tell where I was anymore. I felt caged and in danger, like someone was leering over my shoulder, waiting for me to pass out so I could be targeted. I whimpered when I felt hands on my back and tried to slap them away, but I was forcefully hauled up to my feet. A wail finally tore through my lips, and I started trashing around when I felt myself being lifted off the floor and carried somewhere.

“No! No, stop!” I screamed, my voice nothing but a screech as my nails sunk into whoever was carrying me, “Don’t take me back there! I haven’t done anything, please! No—no! I didn’t mean to—I don’t know—wait, no, please, I’m sorry, stop!”

My body sunk into something very soft and warm as fingertips pressed into my skin, forcefully prying my eyes wide open. My lungs heaved for air as I tried to get away from whoever was touching me, but I couldn’t, they were stronger. They were always stronger, I could never get away. They would never leave me alone, I was always their little experiment. They would cut me open as if I was a rat, they would ask me questions and whip me even if I told the truth, they liked to touch me and make me beg for them to stop…I wanted to die. I couldn’t do this anymore. Why would they torture me like this? Did my mother not love me? Had my father’s ghost abandoned me?

“Please.” I managed to whisper when my body finally froze up, all fight leaving it. My muscles and joints ached, my heart thumped wildly, and I couldn’t hear my thoughts anymore.

“My baby, please, stop.” A female voice pleaded above me, “Nobody is hurting you, tell me what’s wrong, baby. I’m here, your mother is here, please.”

How could my mother be here? The asylum didn’t let anyone visit us. My eyes burned when I opened them, but I couldn’t see well, they were filled with tears. There, looming above me stood the one man I yearned for. His eyes were kind and brown like the most expensive Swiss chocolate, his skin fair with a rosy flush to his cheeks that made him endearing, small spectacles slipping down the perfect slope of his petite nose. The doctor was here.

“Yunho, save me.” My voice was barely audible as I croaked out my words, but I noticed my mother’s eyes widening before I drifted off to the darkness that had come to claim my body. Here, nobody could hurt me.

But even in my dreams, the miscreants wouldn’t leave me alone. I couldn’t tell where I was due to the darkness that enveloped me, but I felt frozen down to the bone. My summer dress did nothing to keep me warm, and the little friction to my arms only caused me to shiver more. I tried to call out to see if anyone was there with me, but my vocal cords wouldn’t even croak. My heart was racing and my eyes burned, I could tell I was in danger but I couldn’t see because of what. The impending doom I felt, however, said to me that I needed to run and that I needed to run now. So, I didn’t wait around as I grabbed the skirt of my dress and aimlessly took off, unable to see anything due to the permeating darkness. My feet hurt from all the little rocks that cut into it, and then something touched my cheek that made me cry out. It was warm, almost scorching hot against my frozen skin. There were whispers around me that I couldn’t make out, or understand even if I concentrated on them, but then one of them started making sense. It made more sense than the others, its timber familiar and warm, kind. Then, I could feel fingers tracing my left cheek, a calming hum easing my tense muscles until I could finally take a deep breath. It burned my lungs, it felt as if I was inhaling for the first time.

“Open your eyes, Miss Harold.” Then, just so that I only could hear it, the familiar voice whispered, “I’m here.”

A gasp tore through my lips as my eyes flew open, jolting me awake as I sat, frantically looking around. It was a lot darker in the room than the last time I was conscious, and the rain was hitting the roof of the house harder than before. Matilda, my mother, Mr Brooks, and Mrs Humphrey all stood at the foot of my bed, different emotions reigning on their faces. As I made eye contact with my mother, she let out a loud sob as she fell into Mr Brooks’ arms, and I felt my lower lip trembling. I hated seeing her in a state like that, worrying over me. Before I could cry too, my head was gently turned to the side until all I could see was the doctor. My mouth opened in shock as the doctor looked at me with sad, but worried, eyes, a wet rag clutched tightly in his other hand.

“Yunho.” My throat felt scratchy as I reached out incredulously, wondering whether I was just hallucinating. I noticed my bloody knuckles were bandaged now, ointment placed on the nightstand table next to my bed, “You are here? Really here?”

“Yes, Miss Harold.” He smiled gently, hesitantly letting me touch his jaw, “How are you feeling?”

“Sick,” I said before I could mule over my answer. My stomach was aching and my head was thumping, “I don’t know what happened to me, Doctor, I cannot remember.”

“Don’t try to remember now, your body and mind are overwhelmed,” Doctor Jeong then gently guided me to lay down in my bed once again, “You need to relax, Miss Harold. You fainted, and Miss Matilda has told me you haven’t eaten all day long, that’s unhealthy.”

“I’m sorry.” I felt like a child being chastised by their parent for the first time, except that Doctor Jeong’s face didn’t look even a little bit angry like my mother’s had back then, “I thought I would throw up if I ate anything, still do.”

The doctor hummed, then slightly turned to look back at the others in the room, “Mrs Humphrey, can you bring me that tea I asked you to brew? It will greatly help Miss Harold right now.”

“It’s storming outside, why did you come?” My eyebrows furrowed as I watched the doctor’s serene face, his spectacles were missing and his hair was a wavy mess on top of his head. Looking further down, I realised he wasn’t wearing his fancy suit. Instead, the doctor wore a beige tunic with the strings undone, showing a silver of his collarbones and chest. His silver cross dangled between his pecks whenever he moved forward to check for my temperature, letting the cold rag ease the thumping of my head. The doctor’s boots were still on his feet and looked muddy, but nobody was paying attention to that as he sat on the edge of my bed, taking care of me.

“I’m a doctor, my duty is to ensure my patients are healthy and safe.” Then he glanced back at my mother and Mr Brooks, Matilda had left the room with Mrs Humphrey, “You scared everyone, you scared me, Miss Harold.”

“Thank you for coming, but what you did was unsafe, Doctor Jeong.” I gulped, eyebrows furrowing in worry, “How will you get back home?”

“He will sleep here tonight, sweetheart.” Mr Brooks answered for the doctor, looking just as worried as I felt, “Can’t let him go out in this bad weather, it’s risky. I will ask the maids to make dinner for you, Doctor Jeong. The guestroom is already being prepared, your butler can sleep with the rest of the servants, if that is alright.”

“Yes, thank you for your hospitality.” Doctor Jeong bowed his head, smiling at Mr Brooks, “I’m sorry to say this, but Miss Harold should rest now and the more of us are in the room, the bigger the risk of overwhelming her is.”

“Oh, of course.” My mother whispered, her eyes glossy again, “Rest, my dear.”

I hummed as I watched her and Mr Brooks leave, leaving me alone with Doctor Jeong as the door closed after the two exited the room. I sighed long, looking at the doctor as he removed the rag from my forehead to wring it in more cold water. We said nothing as he placed the rag back onto my forehead, gently removing wet hair strands from my cheeks. He sat close to my body, but his eyes avoided looking into mine. I gulped, trying to find the right words to say just as there was a knock at the door. Doctor Jeong told them to come in and Matilda came inside with a tray and a cup of tea. She offered me a sad smile as she placed the cup of tea on the nightstand.

“Get some rest tonight, Matilda.”

“But you are not feeling well, young miss.”

“This is an order, how long until you faint from exhaustion? Please, I won’t leave my bed tonight, you shouldn’t either.” The maid looked hesitant, but didn’t say anything other than a quiet ‘thank you’, and then she was out of my room, closing the door after herself.

“Someone should check on you tonight, though.” Doctor Jeong said quietly as he helped me sit up, puffing up the pillows behind my back. He grabbed the cup of tea and handed it to me. It was still hot, its scent herbal. My nose twitched as I took a whiff of it before tasting it, cringing away from it, “It tastes horrible, I know, but it’s very good for your health. Drink it.”

It tasted so bitter I thought I would throw up on the spot, but it was supposed to make me feel better, so I toughened up and drank it as quickly as possible. The doctor watched me as I placed the cup on the nightstand, looking a little amused. I wrung my fingers together and placed them in my lap, looking down at my hands. I felt guilty for having forced the doctor to come all this way in such bad weather, yet he was looking at me with kind eyes and a soft smile.

“How do you feel now?” He asked, turning his body more to face me.

“Slightly better, my head isn’t thumping as violently as before, thank you.” I answered, sinking back into the pillows and cushions, “I think—this could be a grave accusation, but what if Karina is the reason I am like this?”

I couldn’t meet the doctor’s eyes as I chewed on my bottom lip, my thoughts whirling around too quickly for me to comprehend them. The doctor froze for a second, then I saw a hand reach out, only to settle on the blanket next to my thigh. I could feel Doctor Jeong’s body heat through the blanket, I wished he had placed his hand over my thigh instead.

“Why do you think that, Miss Harold?”

“May I call you Yunho?”

“Of course, Y/N.”

For a second, I paused and looked up with a smile. Yunho was already looking at me with a small smile on his lips, and I huffed a little embarrassed. Seeing him dressed so casually was doing something weird to me, my heart raced from excitement as I felt shy all of a sudden.

“Just like on that day, she was saying bad things to me again, antagonising me. I know she hates me, but I get so angry around her that sometimes I can’t even form words.” I gulped, eyebrows slightly furrowing as Yunho’s fingers twitched next to my thigh, “I wasn’t feeling well all day, but then she started speaking and I just—she brought the asylum up and I was back there again, being terrorised and touched—I can’t talk about it, I’m sorry, Yunho.”

“Let’s not talk about it, then.” Yunho’s jaw was clenched as he licked his lips, his forehead creasing as he leaned slightly forward.

“I don’t remember anything after that, even her words are muddy.” I felt helpless as my eyes bore into Yunho’s understanding ones, “Matilda was there the whole time, you can ask her what happened, I’m sure she’ll tell you everything. She hates Karina as much as I do, she wouldn’t lie for her.”

“I’ll keep that in mind, Y/N.” Yunho nodded once, then tilted his head to the side. I gulped, feeling nervous for no reason, “Do you think you’ll be able to sleep tonight? Are you feeling tired?”

I hummed, playing around with my fingers as I looked down at my lap again. Yunho’s fingers were tapping the blanket, his breaths audible but even, “I feel spent, and I know I will be able to sleep, but I’m…scared to fall asleep alone.”

“I understand, I’ll let Mrs Harold know. Perhaps she could keep you company.”

“Yunho?”

“Yes, Y/N?”

“Can you stay until I fall asleep?”

My voice was quiet as I glanced up at Yunho through my eyelashes, feeling my cheeks heat up. He looked taken aback, then something I couldn’t recognise crossed his features for a split second. He exhaled through his mouth and gulped, loudly. He hummed, deep in his chest, and flattened his palm against the blanket as he shuffled his feet around until his muddy boots hit the ground. I realigned my pillows and crawled a little further away on my bed, to make more space for Yunho as he made himself comfortable, still on the edge of it.

“But I cannot stay once you are sleeping, I’m sorry.”

“I know, it’s alright, Yunho.”

Our smiles were small but appreciative. Yunho nodded and chewed on his bottom lip, his eyes raking over my face as I watched his cheeks flush a deep shade of red. It wasn’t warm in my room, but I suppose the sheets could make him feel warm too. His hand balled into a fist, grabbing a tight hold of the blanket as I glanced down at it.

“Sweet dreams, Y/N.”

“You too, Yunho.”

Every waking moment he spent thinking of her. Even in his dreams, she appears as a vixen, tempting Yunho to do unforgivable things. He knows he cannot, he’s her doctor and she’s a patient in desperate need of treatment. Yunho knows this, she isn’t his first case. He’s met people with manic episodes before, potential dissociative amnesia too, but something sets her apart from the rest. Yunho has never once in his life wanted to reach out and cradle one of his patients to his chest and tell them everything would be alright now that he was there. But when he saw her, so frail and generous, soft-spoken and kind, he couldn’t help but feel anger whenever she told him of Karina. Yunho had a feeling she wasn’t like that unprovoked, and the more he heard of Karina and her schemes against his patient, the more convinced he was that Karina had lied in the first place to get her into that asylum, far away from the safety of her home. Yunho knew what went down inside an asylum, he’s treated many mentally unstable patients before, straight inside those horror houses, and his blood boiled anytime he saw pain and terror strike upon her face whenever the asylum was mentioned. Yunho didn’t want to know, truth be told, what had happened to her there because he was sure he’d march up to that asylum and strangle every man who had hurt her. He was a doctor, his ego and fame protected him from making a mistake, but when she had led him inside her bedroom, Yunho was close to throwing it all out the window, quite literally. Her unique scent of hydrangeas had been so potent inside her bedroom, and her sitting daintily on the cushions of her queen-sized bed had his thoughts going haywire. Yunho wanted to touch her, not just tell her that she was safe and sound with him, but show her too. He was wanting and wanting, and he wondered if her story would have a happy ending. Could he save her from the madness they plastered over her head? Or would he dig her a bigger hole once the committee hears his verdict of her mental state? But what Yunho most importantly needed to sort out with himself, was the question that’s been mulling over in his head ever since she had uttered it. Would he be willing to become her caretaker? Just to keep her safe and away from Karina, of course, Yunho was a professional, above all. He told himself he didn’t have second intentions with her, but the more days passed by spent in her company, he couldn’t tell for sure anymore.

            Karina was right about one thing, the committee had given Doctor Jeong one more week to sort out everything. He was right, I couldn’t beat around the bush anymore, besides, we had gotten close in my story to that faithful day. Doctor Jeong knew this, I knew it too. Because he was afraid of overwhelming me again too soon, he had given me two days of bed rest before he’d return to resume our sessions. The two days had gone by and I was nervously waiting for him in the foyer. After the storm passed, the heat returned even stronger. I didn’t wish to stay in the house, it aggravated me anytime I glanced towards the stairs, Karina’s injured body lying by the foot of it too clear in my mind. The doctor’s patent motorcar was louder today than other days as it rolled to the front of the house, where he was welcomed by Mr Allen, the gardener. He was an elderly man who had grown fond of Doctor Jeong like many others in the household. Myself included, which would explain why my heart was beating uncontrollably once again, sweat brimming my eyebrows.

“Will you be alright?” Leia asked as she shuffled past behind me, fresh bedsheets in her arms, “I don’t think Matilda will survive one of your episodes.”

Leia had no mal-intentions, she was just honest down to a pulp. I chuckled, glancing at her as she had stopped in the doorway to the laundry room.

“I might not survive another episode, too.” Leia’s eyes widened guiltily, but I continued to smile, “If the doctor writes a good report about me, I’ll finally be out of your hair, Leia. Pray for it.”

“I don’t believe in God, young miss.”

“Don’t let Doctor Jeong know that.”

Speaking of the devil, his knuckles rasped against the sturdy front door as Leia grinned, disappearing inside the laundry room. I opened the door before the doctor could knock again, welcoming him with a bright smile on my face. He paused, looking taken aback.

“Good morning, Doctor Jeong.” I greeted him, stepping aside to let him walk inside.

“Good morning, Miss Harold, you seem to be doing fine.” He returned a small smile as he shrugged his blazer off, wearing another tunic but fancier this time. It was a deep green, paired with his brown trousers which made him look like he was a huntsman returning from a long hunt to his wife, jittery to have her in his arms. I gulped, feeling embarrassed by my thoughts when I realised, I had imagined myself as the wife Doctor Jeong would return home to. It was inappropriate, but the thought was intrusive and fast before I could stop it.

“Thank you for letting me rest, it has helped.” I hummed, raising a hand when the doctor went to step out of his polished shoes, “Do you mind if we sit underneath the willow tree today?”

“Not at all,” The doctor beamed, taking me off guard, “I was just about to suggest it, you know we cannot postpone today’s topic. Being in a place you love might bring comfort, I hope, at least.”

“You are thoughtful,” I smiled, then led the way towards the tea room, the grand doors were pulled open, letting inside the fresh warm breeze. Mr Allen was in the doorway, trimming the bushes, but he made way for us when he spotted us. I offered him an appreciative smile as he raised his hand in a silent greeting, a straw of wheat between his teeth as he tipped his hat towards Doctor Jeong. The doctor bowed back to him politely before we made our way down the gravel path, headed towards the willow tree. The warmth today made me feel hot despite the thin summer dress I wore, its sleeves short with a sweetheart neckline. It was a sage green, a pretty contrast against my copper curls. Without needing to ask, Matilda has made a daisy crown to wrap around my bun. I felt pretty and safe covered in my favourite things, sitting underneath the willow tree as frogs ribbited down by the pond, bees buzzing by. The doctor got ready as he opened his satchel bag, taking his notebook and new pencil out. As we sat, I noticed our thighs brushing together, the doctor’s now musky cologne invading my senses. When he placed his notebook on his left thigh, twisting his upper body to face mine, the pages of it brushed against my own thigh too.

“In our last session, you spoke about visiting your father’s grave with your mother. You made him a daisy crown since he loved the flowers just as much as you do, and then, when you returned home, your once lover was waiting for you in the foyer.” Doctor Jeong’s tone was gentle but impersonal, he was a professional after all, “You stopped after you said you were fighting and it got…violent? You must elaborate on that, did nobody hear it? Did nobody help?”

I sighed, picking at the grass, “It didn’t get violent in the sense of a physical altercation, but our words were harsh and unforgiving. He called me many names that day, he broke my heart, Doctor Jeong. I know you are curious about what was said, and because it leads up to what happened between Karina and me, I shall tell you.”

The doctor was jotting down my words in his notebook, his hand flying over the page. His bottom lip was between his teeth as he pushed at his spectacles with his other hand. He hummed and briefly glanced at me when I remained quiet for too long. I had to brace myself, so, I took a deep breath and gazed at the doctor instead of at the house, finding my nerves calmer if I gazed at his beautiful face, and his chocolate brown eyes whenever he held eye contact.

“Matthew, the man I had once loved, was my fiancé. He had asked for my hand while my father was still alive, our love story goes way back. We’ve grown up together due to our father’s being friends, and chancefully had fallen in love too. He was always sweet and loving, he respected me, and always heard me out. I suppose that is what attracted me to him most, I could see a glimpse of how my father treated my mother in him. But we had our ups and downs too, he was way too jealous and hated it when I spoke to other men, meanwhile, I had no problem if he had female friends. After my father died…it was hard for me to come to terms with it, I was sad every day for a very long time. I didn’t want to see anyone but my mother, not even Matthew. He knew I needed time, but he was getting impatient, he was bringing up marriage more often than not, but I wasn’t ready yet. I had just lost my father and the thought of not walking down the aisle with him by my side just hurt too much.” I paused and licked my lips, pulling my knees up to my chest as I felt the doctor shift and lean even closer, “And then as my mother and I healed together, she found Mr Brooks. It took them a while to settle down, paperwork and whatnot got in the way as well as people talking nasty behind their backs, but when I found out Mr Brooks had a daughter too, I felt hopeful. I thought I would finally find a true friend, someone to share everything with. Karina was lovely at first, very kind and funny, I could easily consider her my sister even if we weren’t related by blood. But then, one evening we went out to a pub where she finally met Matthew, and things just…changed.”

Doctor Jeong hummed, still writing as I let my eyes take in his focused expression. His forehead was creased slightly as he chewed on his bottom lip, his neck flushed from the heat. I had also shifted more into his space subconsciously, and I had to refrain from tracing his brows before sinking my fingers into his smooth-looking hair, “You see, it wasn’t Matthew who had changed, but Karina’s attitude towards me. She became snappy and rude, she didn’t make it obvious, but I knew she was looking down on me. She barely talked to me now when my mother and her father weren’t around, but she somehow always found time to ask about Matthew. At first, I thought nothing much of it, I figured she might’ve not liked him too much and was looking out for me in an obscure way, but then I found their letters. Mr Allen was bringing in the post and I told him I would sort them out, so when I saw Matthew’s letter, of course I had assumed it was for me…except, it hadn’t been. It was addressed to Karina, and there were all sort of weird questions about me as if whatever Karina had said before had upset him.”

“Has Karina been sending him letters behind your back?” Doctor Jeong looked confused as he looked up at me, his round eyes narrowed and void of kindness. When the doctor was this serious, he looked almost frightening. But I knew he was kind and caring underneath that mask, so I didn’t care. I hummed and nodded, absentmindedly picking at the scabs that had formed over my bruised knuckles.

“Yes, and she was lying to him, saying very ugly things about me. Still to this day, I don’t understand why she did all of that. Leia says she’s blinded by jealousy and wants to be better than me, but unless Karina says it, I don’t want to believe it. Anyways, I didn’t confront Karina right away, I hurried over to Matthew’s house to talk to him.” I huffed sadly, looking at the doctor again, “He was just about to mount his horse and leave for the city, but when he saw me, he knew we had to talk. It turns out, Karina has been lying about me for months now, saying I was seeing other men behind his back and somehow even made up some evidence of it. She had sent him handkerchiefs that had been my father’s, claiming they were of those I was—sleeping with. She even told him I was badmouthing him and that I was only marrying him out of pity, and because my father had made me promise I would marry someone richer than my family. But—it was all lies! I loved Matthew, I always have! I wanted to marry him and have a nice household, but Karina took it all away from me. What he said to me…it had hurt a lot, and it still does, so I won’t repeat his words, but he broke off our engagement and told me to never appear in front of his eyes. I had loved him, Yunho…”

My throat clenched as I took a shuddering breath, eyes filled with tears. Yunho had stopped writing and looked at me with pain in his eyes, bottom lip between his teeth, “I’m sorry, you deserved better.”

I hummed with a sad chuckle and quickly wiped my eyes before the tears could fall. This was it, this is what Yunho had been desperately wanting to hear for a month now. I lowered my legs and looked at Yunho with a neutral expression, making his eyes widen minutely, “I know, but it’s okay. If God is watching like everyone claims him to be, Karina will be punished, and so will Matthew. I was a mess after that conversation with Matthew, and I cried all the way back home. My chest was clenching and my heart was thumping wildly, I thought that was what heartbreak felt like, and I still believe so. When I stumbled through our front door, Karina was just…there. Waiting for me in the foyer with an amused smirk. She didn’t even feign innocence as she asked what happened, she could clearly see Matthew’s crumbled letter in my hand. I won’t deny it, I said some very ugly things to her. I didn’t even let her speak as I exploded on her, I’m still surprised the house staff didn’t try to stop me. I have said this in my report too, but I struck first, I slapped her and pushed her back when she started laughing. She was only doing it to make me even angrier, and it was working.”

My muscles tensed as I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, keeping it in my lungs as Yunho’s jaw was clenched, his eyes focused on my face as I continued talking, “I needed space, so I backed away before I could do anything really hurtful. My head was thumping and my body was shaking, I felt like I was suffocating. Karina just continued laughing as I hurried to the stairs, wanting to lock myself in my room and cry myself to sleep. She was following after me, now cackling instead of laughing, and then she said something—something that I’ll never forget, ‘All that courting and playing around each other just to never even fuck him? Don’t worry, you’re not missing out on anything, sister, he’s not even good in bed.’ I saw red when I heard her say that, my thoughts were a mess and I didn’t even doubt the accuracy of her words. I just reacted, I know I slapped her again as I stopped on the stairs, but I couldn’t say anything as I was close to sobbing, so I just ran up the rest of the stairs, but she was still following after me. She was saying something, and I was screaming at her to shut up, but she wouldn’t. And I—I just really wanted her to shut up, to not look at me with those eyes and I just—I don’t know, Doctor, I don’t know. My whole body was shaking and I couldn’t see clearly, my head was aching and I couldn’t even hear anymore, I just—I just remember suddenly coming to myself again when there was a shrill screech. And then I remember Matilda looking at me with terror in her eyes as she called for Jesper and Mr Allen to come help, to call for a doctor.”

“In your report, you said—”

“I know what I said, Yunho, I said I turned around and gave her a backhanded slap, yanked on her hair and bashed her head against the wall before pushing her down the stairs.” Yunho’s eyes were shaking as our faces were close, “But I don’t remember doing any of those, the lawyer told me to say that to protect myself from a serious accusation. Matilda lied for me, and so did Mr Allen. In the end, Mr Brooks paid the judge and I was simply classified as insane, the case was swept under the rug and I’ve been forced to live like this ever since.”

“I knew there was something wrong with that report,” Yunho muttered under his breath, “But why did you lie?”

“I was young and scared,” I sighed, my eyes searching Yunho’s face for any judgment, but it wasn’t there, “I thought they would lock me up if I didn’t make up a story. But in the end, I was locked up in my own house for six years, a prison still, just different. I fainted in the court too, I don’t remember much from there either.”

Yunho looked troubled as his eyebrows were deeply furrowed, his bottom lip thoroughly chewed on, and his spectacles pushed up on his nose. With his free hand, he reached forward, but stopped just before his fingertips could touch my hand and instead balled it up into a fist and lowered it back into his lap. His jaw clenched as he gulped, shaking his head as he looked down at his notebook.

“I have a scar on my abdomen,” I whispered, hand pressing against my covered stomach, “from having fallen over and cutting myself, do you believe me, Doctor?”

When Yunho’s jaw just clenched and he didn’t look at me, I gulped nervously and reached towards my sleeves to pull them off, to let the dress pool at my waist, but one fleeting glance at me had Yunho reaching forward with a panic-ridden face, his eyes widening, “Stop, what are you doing? I believe you, Y/N, I do.”

His hands were big and warm, wrapped completely around mine as the sleeve of my dress swiftly slipped off my left shoulder. His thumb rubbed my bruised knuckles, and despite the sting, I welcomed the affectionate gesture as it covered my arms in goosebumps. I released a long breath, my eyes boring into Yunho’s. His eyes were easy to read, he looked conflicted and confused. I had no idea if he believed me, but I wanted him to. Hurting Karina was wrong, but she deserved it, and I was glad I managed to make her hurt at least once compared to how many times she had hurt me. But I remained silent as Yunho leaned even closer, our faces a breath away from each other. He gulped, loudly, then frowned. As I opened my mouth, he looked alarmed and scrambled backwards, letting my hands drop into my lap as he gasped, grabbing for his things frantically. I didn’t understand what was happening, but when I tried to help, he just pushed my hand away. My heart hammered in my chest nervously as sweat rolled down my temples, and I stood so quickly I got whiplash. Doctor Jeong was just about to take off towards the house when a desperate question left my lips.

“Will you save me, Doctor Jeong?” My voice was trembling just as much as Yunho’s hands, “Will you become my caretaker and take me away with you, will you?”

My questions went unanswered as Yunho ran off, not even bothering to go inside the house as he followed the cobbled path to the front of the house. The engine of his motorcar was loud as I slumped back against the tree with a dizzy head.

             The committee was more eager than I had thought at first to wrap this whole thing up. Just two days after my last encounter with the doctor, a letter came at an early morning hour that the verdict would be given today. I was nervous, but I braced myself for the worst possible ending, which would be me being sent back to the asylum. I doubted I would survive that once again, so I could only hope the doctor had taken pity on me and would be generous in his report. My mother had been buzzing around the house all morning, making sure everything was perfect for the arrival of the committee. Cookies had been baked, fresh tea was brewed, the ground floor aired out with every corner dusted off, and the tea room was decorated with vases of freshly picked flowers. The grand doors were opened, creating a serene surrounding as I sat on the sofa by myself. Nobody was inside the room except for me, something which was rare. I gaze forward, at the visage, trying to commit it to memory. I wondered if I would get to see it tomorrow too.

Matilda had dressed me in a dainty white dress to feign innocence, with my hair pulled in a low bun, and daisies hanging out of it. It felt as if the ghost of my father was here to cheer me on, to offer me some braveness before everything would unfold. And it would, way too soon. There were loud knocks against the front door before it was opened, and six people piled inside our foyer. My mother and Karina quickly walked inside the room with my mother sitting next to me, meanwhile, Karina took her spot in her favourite armchair. The image was eerily similar to the first day the doctor had arrived, it made my heart race. The rest of my future was in the hands of another man, and I couldn’t do anything about it. I knew what I had done to Karina was wrong, but a small part of me knew that she had deserved it. My muscles tensed when Mr Brooks’ voice carried inside the tea room as he led the committee and Doctor Jeong inside. My jaw clenched and my hands balled into fists as they each walked in, eyes on me as I remained unmoving.

The committee consisted of the town mayor, the judge who had handled my case, the town’s richest married couple, and Father Louis, the head of our church. My stomach churned as the familiar faces sat down surrounding me, leaving space for Doctor Jeong at the front. Mr Brook sat next to my mother and held her hand, making my mother sigh loudly. I didn’t want to look at anyone, I was afraid to see what they hid in their eyes. The doctor seemed tense as he rolled his shoulders a few times, then cleared his throat and accepted the tea from Mrs Humphrey, who had insisted on staying in the room, in the back where she didn’t bother anyone. I couldn’t focus on anyone else but the doctor as he finally seemed like he was ready to speak up. He faced the room and his eyes took in everyone, staying on me for a second too long. I could see Karina sneer from my peripheral vision, but I didn’t care. I was just as curious to hear what Doctor Jeong had to say as the committee.

“Dear committee, Mr and Miss Brooks, Mrs and Miss Harold, and of course, Mrs Humphrey,” Doctor Jeong bowed his head lightly, “Thank you for coming, and I’d like to thank the committee for entrusting me with this intricate and peculiar case. I must say before I begin, that I have encountered cases like Miss Harold’s before, but neither one has been as complex as hers. I trust my personal judgement and everything I have learned up until this point, that my verdict is the right choice, and that if the committee sees it fit as well, it shall proceed with Miss Harold’s sentence accordingly.”

Doctor Jeong’s fingers were wrung together in front of him, his dark blue suit was perfect. He looked dashingly handsome with his wavy hair falling all over his forehead and into his eyes, his spectacles perched into the pocket of his vest. His warm eyes found mine for a second before he looked around the room again, nodding to himself. He took a deep breath and continued his speech, starting to pace around the front of the room. Him standing in front of the garden and the path that led to the willow tree was dreamy, “We all know that Miss Harold had lost her father when she was young, which would be hard news to swallow for a person at any age. I assume that his early death left Miss Harold traumatised in a way that could go unnoticed unless looked upon by a professional, which didn’t happen. Her stress and repressed pain had accumulated, waiting for a small spark to ignite the explosion, which did happen as we all know it. I spent a month daily by Miss Harold’s side, listening to stories of her childhood, and her adulthood, all leading up to the moment we’ve all been curious about. During my time studying her, I’ve come to observe that she is a very kind soul, attentive, and a generous person. She is soft-spoken and very sensitive to everything that happens around her, it is rather hard for me to imagine she could even as much as hurt a fly.”

I gulped, feeling my heart hammer in my chest as Yunho spoke with much conviction, his eyebrows furrowed as he stopped moving around, his eyes settling on Father Louis, “Her mental state, however, fluctuates a lot based on her surroundings, she easily reacts to the change of weather and the change of mood of a person. People like Miss Harold aren’t only in touch with their peers, but with nature as well, as insane as that might sound, it’s a rather special attribute to have. She’s had bad days during our sessions, and I had the chance to further observe the cause of this. As a psychiatrist, I do not enjoy lightly throwing out diagnoses, but I have to ensure the health of my patients. Miss Harold suffers from manic episodes that get triggered by certain words, environmental changes, and people. In Miss Harold’s stories, I have found one person who seemed to be always around her when these episodes happened, making me confident in my theory that she is Miss Harold’s trigger.”

The people in the room gasped as they looked around. My heart was hammering, I could feel my pulse in my throat, but I couldn’t help but let out an amused huff. Karina’s eyes were wide and her knuckles white as she gripped the armrest of the armchair, fear painting her face. It felt satisfying looking at her, and if I hadn’t known the doctor better, I would’ve missed the satisfied smirk on his lips there for a millisecond, “If this wasn’t about the health of Miss Harold, I wouldn’t be throwing out names so unabashedly, but this is to ensure her safety and health. Miss Brooks seems to like to pick on Miss Harold whenever she gets the chance, and she likes provoking her sister. Before anyone could deny my claim, I was witness to such a thing happening, Miss Brooks herself has said some very rude things about Miss Harold that no lady should utter, less about their sister, even if not related by blood. That being said, I cannot throw all the blame on Miss Brooks since Miss Harold is traumatised and doesn’t know how to handle it, or how to control her outbursts.”

Then, as if there was nobody else in the room with us, Doctor Jeong’s eyes found mine, his expression softening. Karina had started crying next to me, but I couldn’t care less as my mother was glaring at her, the committee didn’t look very pleased either.

“What she said in her report…” Doctor Jeong loosened his necktie a little, licking his lips, “Turns out to be true. In a fit of rage, she disassociated and acted upon instinct. I do not know if she had told anyone, but Miss Brooks had come between Miss Harold and her fiancé, breaking off their marriage. As someone who had been in love once, much like all of you in this room, I’d like to assume, we all know what it means to experience our first heartbreak. For someone who had grown up with this boy, loved him with their whole heart, and was supposed to grow old with them, to hear their engagement was broken off based on some lies made up by Miss Brooks not too soon after Miss Harold’s has lost her father must’ve been devastating. Thus, the trauma she had experienced before due to her father’s untimely death combined with another tragedy has made Miss Harold’s mind break, lose its bearings, making her unable to tell right from wrong.”

I couldn’t breathe as my eyes bore into Yunho’s, filling with tears. I had expected him to go against me for having lied in my report, or to try and go around the topic without bringing it up much, but no, he was actively lying for me and keeping up the image that I had a lapse of judgement all this time. My mother’s hand found mine as she squeezed it reassuringly, tears streaming down her cheeks. I glanced at her fleetingly, my body buzzing with life as my hands trembled. I wanted to see the faces of the committee members, but Yunho was all I could look at. There was a heavy sigh in the room, it could’ve come from Mr Brooks or someone else, I couldn’t tell.

“I’m very close to giving my verdict, so allow me to say this before that,” Yunho smiled softly, looking towards the committee with a gentle look on his face, but with a steely look in his eyes, “Miss Harold’s is a human like all of us in this room, and she is allowed to make mistakes. She’s been punished for her mistakes, probably unfairly, and we mustn’t make the same mistake again. I have concluded, that Miss Harold needs an environmental change for her to fully heal. This house no longer feels homey to her, she feels caged in and watched all the time, plus now you all know that Miss Brooks won’t leave her alone either. As a verdict, I have concluded that if the committee and her mother agree, Miss Harold could be assigned a new caretaker. And…before you make suggestions as to who could fit this role best, I would like you all to consider me as her new caretaker for the next year. I am a doctor, I know what to do and how to act in case she is having another episode. I will be leaving the country in a month to return to France, where my foster father has requested my presence. The environmental change would benefit Miss Harold greatly, that is, if you trust me, of course.”

I felt close to fainting by the time Yunho had stopped talking. Him, Doctor Jeong Yunho, my new caretaker? Could that be possible? Would the committee even let it happen? I had no idea, but I wanted to fall in his arms and sob as I thanked him for his effort, for listening to me, for trying to save me from this place. The committee erupted in whispered mutters amongst themselves, but Father Louis seemed more than pleased with Yunho. His brows were sweaty as he dabbed at them with the back of his wrist, his arms covered with the sleeves despite the heat. My mother wasn’t moving next to me, and Mr Brooks had turned his body away from Karina, who was trying to catch her father’s gaze insistently. Then, there was a tsk as the judge rose to his feet, all eyes falling on him.

“Thank you. Doctor Jeong, for your in-depth analysis and for the tabs and reports you’ve been keeping on Miss Harold this month, we appreciate it.” He rubbed at his chin, his hair already silver from age, “We have selected you, Doctor, to treat this delicate case because we have heard of your expertise. You have never once failed to treat your patients accordingly, and I find no reason to doubt your verdict, however, wouldn’t it be risky to take Miss Harold away from here? Couldn’t that trigger her madness even more? And if Mrs Harold won’t agree, she cannot go. Either way, we cannot let her go unless you promise to report back to us monthly, Doctor Jeong, and once the one year is up, you must return her home. She shall be reevaluated, then her fate will be decided for the future.”

When Yunho and my eyes met again, I knew my fate had been sealed. France, a new beginning by his side, sounded like a far-fetched dream that was now within my reach.

Yunho was a professional, except when it came to her. The lines had blurred long ago, he couldn’t tell who was the doctor and who was the patient when it came to her. All Yunho knew was that he could never let her go, not when she clung to him as if her life depended on him. Her lips tasted like honey and her moans were the prettiest music he had ever had the chance to hear, her skin soft and warm and her body so pliant underneath his. All it took was one touch from her for his whole being to crumble, he felt drunk on her, insatiable. Yunho knew he couldn’t let her return home, not now that he’d found Mingi too, not when the three of them were living in a tucked away village in a homey cottage, away from prying eyes. Yunho finally had what he’d been yearning for his whole life. His family was back, right within his reach, and even when he missed his home, he’d gaze upon Mingi and her, and realise that his home was here with them. And she was sweet like nectar, Yunho’s guilty pleasure that he just couldn’t get rid of—didn’t want to get rid of. He was a bad man for preying upon the innocent and unassuming ones, but may God forgive him for his sins, he was just a man after all. He knew he was bound to become insane like his patients one day, but Yunho was already a madman for her, and he didn’t care. Profession be damned, only the four walls of their cottage would truly know the truth, much like her amnesiac brain that had no desire to return to a land and home that’s treated her so horribly once. Here, Yunho was a complete man and he had wowed to protect what was his…no matter what it took. Mingi and her were staying there with him, forever.

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[traffys-heart]

Please more virgin! Loser! Law 🥰😍😍😍😍

virgin! loser! law headcannons | sfw + nsfw

somehow he seems to be more popular than my man rosinante (˙◠˙) i acc was a law girl before the blond beauty got introduced and i got a figure of him and everything. i dont even have any corazon merch so maybe in the end i am the bigger law fan. also ty for 100+ followers! ur all so amazing <3

also big ty to my wonderful beta reader @mysunfishpeedinmyroom

cw: lowercase, pervert! law, male masturbation,

i think virgin! loser! law would react differently depending on the reader’s background. for example, let’s say ur one of his crew. he would be super reluctant and difficult to get out of his shell and make a move on u. factors including his own position above u plus not wanting to reveal his awkwardness (everyone on the tang already knows) would make it hard for him to show his true feelings.

if reader was a straw hat then he would probably have a slightly easier time due to shachi and penguin nudging him in ur direction. while he still wants to maintain his ‘cool nonchalant guy’ persona he’s much more willing to seem less professional in front of u. good luck impressing ur favorite protective sisters nami and robin tho, and don’t get me started on sanji. the straw hat family always makes sure to look out for each other, even if those potential dates r nakama.

civilian! reader is the most likely the easiest. there is almost a zero percent chance he’ll run into u again on accident if he screws up and he’s given the upper hand in most situations. his nerdy interests aren’t seen as a weakness but sweet in the eyes of someone who is untrained in battle. he likes the softness of ur heart.

physical affection is weird for him. besides cuddling bepo and assuring his crewmates in a friendly manner on their performance he doesn’t really do ‘PDA’. if u two r going to be holding hands and hugging in public it’s going to be initiated by u. he gets used to it early on tho and begins to crave it, shyly coming up to u and asking for ur hands.

ur first kiss was nothing short of strange. law had kissed people before…like…his mother and his little sister. one time cora-san kissed him on the forehead…does that count? so law was very unprepared when u first leaned in. sure he knew what he was supposed to do, but actually following through was a whole other thing.

with cheeks puffed up like a blowfish, he slowly met ur lips w his own. ur eyes were closed so u didn’t get to see the downright hilarious sight in front of u, however the kiss was certainly… different.

like i’ve mentioned in my other headcannon posts law loves chatting abt his interests. whether it be his coin collection or sora if u can sit down and listen to his yap sessions u two r made for each other. that doesn’t mean he doesn’t like to hear u talk tho either, no he adores when u give him in depth detailed recounts of ur day or mini lessons of ur own favorite subjects.

˚₊· ➳ ♡ nsfw time !!

law had read and watched a lot of porn before u, usually jacking off or just sitting w his pent up energy while the rest of the crew whored out at port. this had changed when he met u. before u guys even started dating, probably when he first met u, he scrapped his fiction entirely.

his wank bank material now only consisted entirely of images of u. whether they be actual memories of u throughout the day or fragments of dreams he kept stored in the back of his mind, law no had longer his plastic wrapped novels to keep him entertained.

even better, in his free time he thought he’d try his hand at writing things abt the two of u. of course they had different names, and he attempted to keep the descriptions loose, but he knew he was writing about u. his pen scribbling away at night under the guise of paperwork it makes his crew question why he becomes so red when they try to bring him tea in his study.

he also tried his hand at drawing porn, thinking back to the art lessons giolla taught him. however after looking at his first piece and then comparing it to ur image he decided he should stick to smut.

when u two started dating jerking off became so much easier for him. all he had to do was press one of ur sweaters to his face or recall the memory of ur actual hands on his face and would cum all over his tattooed chest. it occurred to him one day that u masturbate to him as well and the thought a lot was enough to coat the inside of his jeans.

law’s favorite way to get off is suffocating himself in one ur pillows and pretending ur riding his face. the idea of being squished underneath u while u use him for ur own pleasure is so hot he can’t help but fuck his hand to the thought. he’ll probably lick ur pillow if he gets really into it bc he’s just kinda gross like that.

when he saw u naked for the first time he couldn’t believe his eyes. u two had cuddled late into the night with plans to watch some movies and ended up talking each others’ ears off in the end. when u woke up u decided u needed a morning shower and started stripping before u noticed law waking up.

he was immediately off put by the lack of ur presence by his side so when he opened his heavy eyelids to ur bare chest and naked ass at the end of the bed, he totally thought he was still in his wet dream.

u don’t think much of it before u start heading towards his private full bath, simultaneously showing off ur assets to ur sleep ridden boyfriend. law had half a mind to grab his picture snail and capture this moment. considering his own background, for him, this was a moment in history.

when u came back with ur hair wet and nothing but a towel on law was much more prepared to sing ur praises. he was hesitant to touch u, more inclined to sit back and watch u dry urself (he wants to beg u to drop ur towel so bad) and apply ur lotions.

having a little pervert as a boyfriend isn’t so bad. esp when he shows u what his surgeon grade hands can do (˵ ¬ᴗ¬˵) (surgery. that’s all)

[omgfangirlland]

The Shadows That Nurture 8

"What has been happening in Gotham?" Bruce being a dumbass that's what.

Ch9 has more of The Grayson family interaction and I think I will follow the timeline of the comics for the death of guardians- that way there'll be more time for Nolan's A+ parenting.

Masterlist || First || previous<< Chapter 8 >>next

Gotham Heights has seen better days.

It’s been years since the rogues simply went mad, declaring war on specifically Bruce Wayne. It’s been years since Selina and Jason stopped talking to him, Catwoman did her best to avoid him while Red Hood seemed to revert to his Arkham Knight days, pure rage running through his veins.

Bruce doesn’t know what happened, what tipped all the rogues over the edge to deem Bruce Wayne, of all billionaires, enemy number one. He tried to look back and figure out what he did- if he said anything- as soon as he realized that they were teaming up and weren’t planning on stopping anytime soon but he found nothing beyond the media calling him a neglectful father to his youngest girl, which he found absurd. He loved Cassandra, went to every ballet show, and was so proud of her, so he didn’t bother to read what they were actually saying, deeming it as nothing but useless gossip. If only he glanced at the context…

Batman couldn’t keep up with the attacks, so everyone was out all year round, the man even having to ask Nightwing for help more than once or ten times. He didn’t like this. His kids still had school, and Damian still had so much to learn- fighting criminals nightly wasn’t helping set the no-killing rule into the boy and the sleepless nights weren’t helping his mood at school.

The man was getting tired. But the rogues did seem to take a day off every month, on the thirteenth. The first two months he didn’t recognize the pattern but by the third, he thought they were planning something big, and when the next day was just like the past two months his brain was racking with questions about the possibilities, fear running through his spine and making him so paranoid he could barely sleep.

It took him so long to find out where they all met on the thirteenth- it was embarrassing honestly, but he still did it. All rogues, separately mostly, would stop by flower shops, buying bouquets of lilacs and narcissi flowers. The next stop after the shop would be Gotham cemetery where each one of them would put a bouquet on a lady’s grave, a nobody, with no ties to them, the woman could barely keep a job as a waitress when she was alive. And the last stop would be Red Hood’s territory.

Batman knew that as soon as he and Robin stepped a toe on the territory, Jason would know, so while Bruce followed the main lead, Damien became the distraction. It took a while to find the rogues, and the image that was presented made him more confused than anything.

The rogues were in the alley between a hospital and an orphanage that opened about six or seven years ago, both walls of the buildings in the alley had big painted murals, both depicting Lady Gotham in the background while the foreground had soft, happy-looking people in different styles helping each other, “To a better community. To a better Gotham.” written at the bottom as a graffiti. He assumed the scribbles he couldn’t make out on the sides of the murals were the names of the people who drew them, though, a style predominated the others, it was safe to say that it was a collaboration.

Harley was making balloons for kids, mostly dogs, crowns, and swords as Grundy sat by her, holding the equipment and letting the kids climb him. Killer Croc and Bane seemed to be focused on bringing tables and chairs to set them down in an orderly fashion, as Two-Face and Riddler helped the older ladies carry the food. Penguin was busy talking to a nurse while his goons shared care packages to the patients and kids, all the while Ivy was reblooming the plants around the building. Mr. Freeze seemed stuck on ice cream making duties while also keeping the refreshments cold.

Batman had more questions than answers.

“This may be neutral ground, Bruce.” Jason’s voice behind him made Batman freeze before he slowly turned to face his son. “But you’re not welcome here.” His second oldest finished, his hands at his side, clenched tightly, itching to fight, to punch him.

“Since when is Red Hood territory neutral?” The older man couldn’t help but ask, but Jason didn’t answer him, instead telling him to leave once more. “Or I can just tell all the rogues down there who you really are. I’m sure they’ll be happy to kill two birds with one stone.”

Bruce frowned beneath his cowl as he felt Jason’s anger in his bones. They both worked hard to reconcile- but now the progress was back to zero once more. His inquiry about what happened between them both only seemed to anger the younger man even more, but Jason’s anger snuffed out as realization washed over him, laughter bubbling up instead.

Batman could only watch in confusion as Jason laughed at him. “You really don’t know, do you?” The younger man chuckled lowly, shaking his head as his shoulders slumped in defeat. “Goddamn Bruce, I know you deem protecting Gotham more important than your kids, but this is low even for you.”

“You’ve been missing a bird for almost six years, Batman. If you can’t connect the dots, then maybe it was the right decision to leave.” Jason turned his back to Bruce, walking away from the man. “I made mistakes. Like you. But when I came back, I rectified them, I don’t think you’ll be given the chance.”

“Leave. We’re being peaceful, fulfilling a promise we made to a kid. We can fight tomorrow.” Were his last words as he jumped down from the building, making his way to the little party as well while Batman’s eyes lingered on his back. Jason was just as exhausted as Bruce.

“You told him too much, kitten.” Selina purred from inside the orphanage, the kids inside too busy fawning over the fluffy cats she brought to pay attention to them. She was met with the blank mask of Red Hood. “And somehow, I’m sure it’ll still be a while until he figures it out.” Jason scoffed.

Batman sighed with defeat, calling Robin to the rendezvous point and telling the others to meet him in the Batcave, not giving them more of an explanation. He wasn’t missing anyone- he was sure. Dick, Jason, Tim, Barbara, Cassandra, Duke, Damian, even Stephanie- he just saw them, he just heard them. The drive to the Batcave was silent, Bruce lost in his thoughts while Damian was frowning, pouting really. 

Bruce made sure to count heads once more when everyone was present as he told and showed everyone what he discovered. “We should attack while they aren’t expecting us. They’ll surely talk then.” Damian was quick to interject, completely overlooking that Todd said there was a missing person. “No way!” Duke closed the idea before anyone had a chance. “There are too many civilians that will get caught in the crossfire-”

Cassandra could only watch as her family argued and tried to come up with a solution, as they tried to find out who Jason was referring to. Her brows furrowed behind her mask. He couldn’t be talking about- no. Bruce sent her away like he mentioned that one time to Alfred. Her little sister is safe in London- Bruce surely remembers... Right?

A few states over, Joker is laughing while he falls from miles in the air, three figures looking down at the crazy clown. Like Batsy hasn’t tried this trick on him before, they’re not even as intimidating, wearing those silly costumes. But then the ground kept coming closer and closer, his gleeful expression turning into a shocked frown. “Oh boy-“ The Joker gulped.

Tag list: @bat1212 @trashlanternfish360 @shycreatorreview @syrooo @a-lurking-fae @alittletiredcry @kittzu @plsfckmedxddy @blackhood1229 @nxdxsworld @leeiasure @dandelion-delusion @lovebug-apple @sillysealsies @tsxukikami @enchantingarcadecreation @alishii @d3nnji

A/n: Special thanks to @fightmebissh for putting the idea of murals in my head- I won't be able to let it go :))

Also- the flowers I specifically used for their meanings. Lilacs of shades of purple to reflect spirituality and a specific lilac color that is associated with one’s first love or the first time one feels love for someone, and Narcissi for rebirth and good fortune, awareness, and inner reflection.

I always feel like I'm forgetting something when I post these...

[digonthis]

Catered Audience- Pt. 3

Spencer Agnew x f!Reader

2.2k words

( ᴅᴍ ᴏʀ ᴄᴏᴍᴍᴇɴᴛ ғᴏʀ ᴛᴀɢ :] )

slow burn-ish, fluff, mutual pining, all that shit

part 1 part 2

‧₊˚ ✩°｡⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡♡ ⋆˙⟡♡⋆｡°✩˚₊‧♡‧₊˚ ✩°｡⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡♡ ⋆˙⟡♡⋆｡°✩˚₊‧

You were honestly surprised by the amount of friends you’d made just from catering for Smosh. At Mythical you had a few people you’d stop and chat with casually, just regular small-talk stuff. But every time you showed up here you seemed to make at least a few new friends, the kinds of friends you could actually see yourself hanging out with regularly.

That day, you had caught some guy inspecting the order receipt. Thinking you’d messed up, a conversation started and soon enough it was casual chit chat, something like what old friends would do. He said his name was Alex, a good friend of Kiana who had apparently brought you up one or twice in conversation the last little while. He was happy to answer your somewhat silly questions about what his job was like as you finished up your work, but a question of his own stopped you in your tracks.

“Have you seen the little moments of fame you’ve had on the channel lately?”

He brought it up as casually as you would the latest news report or a change in the weather, but the topic had your heart beating a little faster. “I think it’s absolutely hilarious, and between you and me I did think that Spencer guy was super funny!” 

You lean on your cart as you bring Spencer up, the truth was that you’d been watching Smosh in the background during all your cooking lately, primarily videos where he’d been present. That was only a little bit on purpose. “I mean like- in the video I watched you guys film. I love Limp Bizkit, so the impression killed me. And he was so funny and full of energy, even if he sucked at darts! I was cheering for him the whole time, even though it was pretty obvious he wasn’t gonna win-” You cut yourself off suddenly, realizing you’d started to ramble about a guy you’ve never met to a complete stranger.

Alex, sensing he’d really caught your attention, proceeded to hype Spencer up. Coolest guy in the office, super nice, super fun to be around. Absentmindedly, he crumpled and uncrumpled the catering receipt in the pocket of his jacket as he spoke. You were pretty much hooked on every word, all the while trying and failing to keep a casual look about the whole thing. “It’s pretty impressive, you know. The amount of credit you’re getting without even being in the studio. If people didn’t already know you for the bangin’ food they definitely know you now…” He says, and you sense a small ulterior motive behind his words.

“Hell, you could come to the office Christmas party and nobody would even bat an eye…” He says slyly, sipping his drink as wheels turn in your head.

“Uh… I dunno about that much, hm. Wouldn’t want to cause a fuss or be out of place or anything…” You say, the social anxiety already creeping up on you. What would you even say? What would you do? Who would you talk to? What would you wear? You noticed your hands moving a little more quickly and messily as you packed everything up, barely listening as he continued. “I’m sure everyone would be happy to see you, you know. No pressure or anything, just an idea.”

He left the room after dropping that idea, leaving you alone with your thoughts. The idea of being nothing more to Smosh than a one-off joke was a little saddening, especially after enjoying conversations with people as much as you had. Fading to the background now would mean likely losing a lot of that interaction, but the alternative was arguably worse, crashing a company Christmas party and hoping people like that plan. If they didn’t… well, the idea sent a shiver down your spine.

You spent the next few weeks as usual, scolding yourself internally as the christmas party came to your mind more than a few times. You busied yourself in your work, prepping excessively and way too far in advance, just as an excuse to give your mind something to do other than think about it.

In one of the videos you watched as you worked, a ‘who knows me best’ starring Spencer, Angela mentioned you again. You refused to look at the screen, not even wanting to see how anyone reacted, but like any other video it was only minutes before you were rewinding the video, pausing and zooming and analyzing people’s reactions to you. Giggles were audible behind the camera and Angela had a big shit-eating grin on her face, but Spencer was what you really cared about. 

The way he pursed his lips, shoulders shaking to give away his quiet chuckle before he finally broke into a small smile. You told yourself the light blush across his cheeks was the lighting, and forced your eyes away. Back to work, a blush forming on your own cheeks as you continued.

As you finally sat down on the couch, you felt your phone buzz from your pocket. Fishing it out, an email from Smosh was the first thing you saw. You immediately perked back up, despite your exhaustion. and cracked open a redbull. A gigantic and fairly extravagant order, definitely meant for the holiday party. You were surprised at the quality of the ingredients they were springing on, nothing like golf leaf or caviar but a lot of high-ticket products that made you cringe when sending over the price quote. 

Within minutes they had agreed without protest, and the redbull had already been downed. You decide against watching any more Smosh for your mental health’s sake, so you throw on some vinyl and get to work.

After a few days of non-stop work, you were glad to have a regularly scheduled dinner delivery to Smosh, as a break from being alone and doing nothing but baking. The christmas party order had an insane amount of sweets, so you’d been making plenty of cakes, cookies, squares, bars… thinking about it too long makes your head hurt.Wheeling your cart into the studio as usual put a smile on your face quickly though, as you immediately met Angela’s eye.

“What’s for dinner today?” She asks, falling into step with you as she attempts to peek under the foil of the containers. “At least let me put them on the counters first!” You giggle, quickening your pace a little to tease her. “Whatever it is, it smells so good…” 

As the two of you walk along and chat, you lock eyes with the same guy you’d met last time. The one who suggested you come to the christmas party, Alex. He smiles, waving to you and Angela. “What’s up? Did you convince her to come yet?” “Come to what?” Angela asks. “I just tracked her down now, haven had time to ask anything yet…” She adds mischievously, a smirk on her face.

“I just meant the christmas party” Alex returns pointedly. It felt like there was something in this conversation you couldn’t fully understand, but you didn’t have time to ponder this as Angela’s hand shot to your shoulder, an excited glint in her eye. “You gotta come, it’ll be so fun! The girls are planning matching outfits and there’s always great drinks and people and something crazy always happens, it’s such a good time…” She continues her rant on and on until you’ve got all the food set up and people start making plates. The only thing that seemed to stop her tirade was the idea that something would run out before she’d get to eat.

You sigh and lean against the wall, finally having a moment of peace. You still found it to be a horrible idea, like crashing a party you weren’t meant to be at. Alex seemed to read your mind, leaning next to you.

“She has a point, somewhere in all that rambling. People would love to have you there, but… no pressure.”

He seemed apprehensive at the end of the statement, pondering something to himself before deciding to stay quiet. Needing to break it, you voiced your own opinion.

“It’s just so foreign to me, I guess. I’m not technically part of the company, or really ever been part of a company. It’s always just been me working for me, I have no clue how to act at a work party. It’s not my party to go to, and it’d just be too… weird.”

To your surprise, Alex didn’t argue your opinion. Just nodded and shrugged. “You’re not weird. Nobody would think you’re weird. From what I've seen, you have a knack for getting people to favour you, especially when you throw in a freebie with the order.”

With that strange anecdote he left the room casually, leaving you to think. What did he mean? At least it was good that people liked you but what freebies had you-

oh.

oh.

Why the fuck did he know about that???

You were a little glad he had left the room and wasn’t witnessing your little freak out, packing your things quickly and getting out of there as fast as possible. Selina caught you by the door before you can leave, your frazzled expression worrying her. “Who is Alex… close friends with?” You ask awkwardly as she tries to get you to spill whatever is on your mind. “Ah, he’s a super friendly guy but he’s definitely closest with Spenc-” “Nope!” You cut her off blankly, carting your shit out of the building without explanation leaving poor Selina confused and worried for you.

Alex must’ve talked to Spencer about you. Spencer must’ve talked about you to Alex. He took that receipt. How much does he know? What is there to know at all? Why did you tell Alex, a whole stranger that much the other day? You stand in front of your car door, weighing your options.

You could storm back in there, track him down and make him swear to secrecy. Search his office for the receipt, and threaten him for any information he had about you.

You could… drive all the way to Canada, change your name and start a new life?

You could grab a pint of ice cream and watch movies alone on your apartment until you fall asleep…

You went with the third option.

Ben and Jerry weren’t the best at giving advice but they sure did provide a comfort that you needed, until your phone buzzed with a instagram DM from Selina checking in. You assured her you were fine, but she wanted to know more. Within minutes you caved and sent paragraphs upon paragraphs of everything, from initially seeing Spencer to making the stupid cupcake to Alex and the receipt to the christmas party, and all Selina had to say in response was… laughing emojis. You threw your phone against the wall and fell asleep promptly.

Soon enough, it was the day of the christmas party and you were in a bit of a craze from all the cooking and baking you’d been submerging yourself in to forget about your feelings. You couldn’t help but feel proud as you looked over the vast expanse of food you’d made, the intricate and huge gingerbread house the star of the show. 

Once everything was packed into your car, you felt a slight pang of dread. It would be the first time going back to Smosh since Alex’s little comment and your realization that Spencer probably knew more about you than you thought, but you quickly shook the feeling away. You had planned for this, it would take you a long time to set everything up at the venue so you’d given yourself plenty of time, enough so that you would be out the door and gone before any partygoers even show up. Keys in ignition and brave face on, you headed out.

The venue was just as extravagant as the catering order. It took you a few trips to get everything in, the only other person already there was Ian himself, and you insisted you didn’t need his help bringing things in. You hadn’t had the chance to speak with him much prior, but he was really nice and very complimentary to your work, especially the gingerbread house and gingerbread cookie of himself. You were having a great time talking to him, pleasantly surprised with his interest in the process of making everything, until you were tackled from behind with a hug.

“Thank God you decided to show!” Shrieked a voice so energetic it could only be Angela’s. “I knew you would, I did! I should have got you the dress to match, shit! This is gonna be so fun, don’t even worry-”

Ian looked at you confused as you gently pried her off, trying to quiet the excitement down so you could get going. “Show… for what?” He asked, catching Angela’s attention. “The party! I told her to come but she insisted she wouldn’t, but I think Alex changed her mind…” 

“Um, no. Sorry… I was just dropping the stuff off…” You interject awkwardly, gesturing to the tables of food and dessert you’d just finished arranging. Ian took the brief silence as an opportunity to make you an offer that had your stomach dropping.

“Whatever we’re paying you for all this food definitely isn’t enough. The least I could do is let you eat some of it! Since it seems you’re friendly with the cast, it only makes sense.” He says casually, a completely oblivious smile on his face.

The only thing worse than intruding on a party was rejecting an invite once you’re already there. With Angela looking at you so hopefully and Ian sharing such a gracious offer, you really couldn’t say no without being insanely rude, so you nodded and smiled, your brain going haywire.

“Thanks, I hope I'm dressed okay, I really didn’t plan on staying…” You smooth your slightly wrinkled shirt down before Angela places a hand on yours. “Have you ever seen our costume department?”

The grin on her face tells you that you would be seeing it soon.

(A/N- ɪ ᴘʀᴇᴡʀᴏᴛᴇ ᴛʜʀᴇᴇ ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀs ᴛᴏ sᴇᴇ ɪғ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ғᴡ ᴛʜɪs ! ɪ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴡʜᴇɴ ɴᴜᴍʙᴇʀs ɢᴏ ᴜᴘ sᴏ ɪғ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʜᴀᴘᴘᴇɴs ɪʟʟ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇ ᴍᴏʀᴇ! ɢɪᴠᴇ ᴍᴇ ᴀ ʙɪɢ ᴊᴜɪᴄʏ ᴋɪss ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴏᴍᴍᴇɴᴛs ᴏʀ sᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ )

Part 4>>

[mvrkieboo]

Old Bloodhounds

P53 | i'm here now

Mark came all the way from taking his final paper directly to your hospital. He liked to shrink away from your gaze, blend into the background, and always stayed quiet when visiting you—but he still visited. Why? Mostly because…he needed the reassurance that you were still alive and awake. He needed it like he needed air to breathe, to see that you had the second chance to live past Yoonsu, among your loved ones once more.

But he—he wasn't ready to be included among those people yet. He was in love with you, and he was aware you somewhat loved him too, whether romantically or not didn’t matter to him at the moment. He was just sure that you loved him regardless—but he could never forgive himself for what he did to you. That’s why he shrinks himself, making it as if he’s not even there in your room as you entertain your other visitors.

So imagine his surprise when he realised he was your only visitor for today. At 2 PM in the afternoon, just after lunch hour—you were looking straight at him, and his hand still held the door.

“Mark! Oh, thank god, I was starting to get bored.” You sighed in relief, albeit a little too…theatrically?

Not even Yuno was here? Your dad? Not even Geonwoo and Woojin?

Was this a—

“Everyone set you up so I can finally have a heart-to-heart with you.. You either close the door on your way in or way out, Mark. But be advised, one of those two choices is gonna make me cry.”

This was a set up.

He begrudgingly closed the door, walking over to the chair on your bedside that faced the window.

“...hi.” He croaked out.

“Hey, Minhyung.”

He froze, gripping on the bed rail, squeezing his eyes shut at the way you called his name.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you.” He spoke with a shaky voice, feeling like there were only just the two of you in this world right now.

“I know that wasn’t your intention, but it still stung.” You told him in earnest, then reached out your hand to touch under his chin, tilting his head up so he could directly face you.

“Minhyung, just talk to me. It’s the least you could do.”

“I don’t know how.”

“What do you mean you don’t know how?”

Mark’s face fell at your question.

“I don’t know how to speak to you without thinking about how I don’t deserve being here with you. I treated you like shit! I was a fucking asshole—”

“So was everybody else! Everyone was an asshole to me, everyone treated me like shit back then, but they got over themselves.—you should too!” You cut him off swiftly, raising your arms in frustration at his stubborn behaviour.

“I’ve been an asshole to you since the beginning. Ever since you took my order at your pop up coffee shop, and you’ve always been so understanding, it just..” Mark trailed off, feeling his tears rolling down his face, “You’re the most selfless and bravest person I know, and I’ve been nothing but shitty to you. You…you deserve better than me, Y/N.”

You took hold of his face, both of your hands framing his face and pulling on him slightly. He held the railing again, not exactly resisting or pulling himself away, but was displaying a little caution with the way you came closer to him. He glanced at the spot where you had been stabbed, hoping you didn’t hurt yourself doing this.

“Y/N…”

“Stop putting me on a pedestal, Minhyung. Don’t you realise you’ve been treating me like a martyr?”

And you’ve never seen him look so horrified before. The horror Mark felt at this moment was comparable to the horror he felt on the night you got stabbed.

“You visit me without speaking to me, you just stare at me, bring me fresh bouquets every time you come—it’s like you’re visiting my grave, Minhyung, but I’m alive. I’m awake. I’m here breathing and living with you, so why can’t you look at me without looking like you’re grieving over me?”

One of his hands went up to hold yours, shaking his head in your hold.

“No, I’m not—”

“Then come back to me.”

Your voice broke, your tears fell—you’ve been so happy celebrating your reunion with everyone else, why did he have to be the one reunion that tore your heart apart?

“All those times I suffered under Yoonsu, all I kept thinking about was how happy I was gonna be once I get to reunite with everyone I love—but now you’re pulling away from me, and I don’t how else am I gonna bring you back to me. I can't lose you—what do I have to do to bring you back to me?”

Mark’s hands now held your wrists. Even as you cried over him, you still wiped away his tears. He was hurting you, but you still tried to soothe him and comfort his aching heart.

He needed to get over himself.

He needed to be there for you.

Mark’s hands went to hold your wrists as he finally leaned in to your hold on him, pressing and pushing his face against your open palms, warm with life, blood still pumping underneath your skin. You were alive. You were awake. You were here, returned to him.

Now he had to return to you too.

“Okay. Okay, I’m here now, Y/N. I’m here now, with you. You don’t have to do anything—I’m sorry that it took me so long to come back. I'm sorry.”

You immediately pulled him into a tight hug, and he gladly wrapped his arms around you too.

“Stay. Stay this time.” You begged him.

“I'm not going anywhere else. I'll always be here. With you.”

prev | masterlist | next

A/N : let the record show i wrote this entire chapter while listening to a ludwig livestream on twitch

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

taglist <333

@spiderm444rk @morkiee @xiuriii @thevirginsuicidenotes @neozon3nha @herebyaccident0 @injunnie-lemon @mystverse @dearmonamour @v-6893 @sehunniepot @bee-the-loser @gomdoleemyson @luluvhs @sunghoonsgfreal @docilismo @neocrashed @soobinbunnie5 @cigarettesafterjae @dudekiss3r @kittydollzz @urlocalbeaner5 @polarisjisung @conwunder @wonupuppy @jae-n0 @413ktz @kimsaerom @meowtella @aerivrs @swanyvess @morkleesgirl @sthwaaberry @nominzn @grassbutneo @spicyryujin @koizekomi @sunflowerhae @markeroolee @tinyelfperson @leeymws @sullkyoonz @pandagirl753 @momo-peachy @lycheecheeseyogurt @gukuwii @johnuskglasses

[andy-15-07]

Imagine Danny/Joaquin not realising or not even questioning that the reader is multilingual until he hears her speak in another language to her family for the first time and hes just there like 👁👄👁

Like maybe shes local but is in a different ethnic group but they both normally speak in English so they both never question it

Maybe hes a little more shooketh when she speaks in a dialect of a language (sometimes out of habit and sometimes just to put him off once he starts to understand a bit of what she says)

Wait… You Speak WHAT?

PAIRING: Danny Ramirez x Reader 💋

WORD COUNT: 861✍️

REQUESTS: Open! 💌 (send yours my way ,I love writing them all!)

🌟 Danny Ramirez Masterlist 🌟 | 🔥Kink Masterlist 🔥

Joaquin Torres Masterlist | Bodyguard AU’s

Sugar Daddy Danny Masterlist 💕 | Our Little Falcon Masterlist

A/N: Heyy! So this fic was inspired by a fun idea that I’m actually from Romania, and I wanted to weave a little piece of that into the story. The whole concept of Danny being surprised that Y/N speaks Romanian came from real life — how sometimes people don’t realize you’re multilingual just because you mostly speak English. Writing this made me think how cool it would be to teach someone Romanian one day (maybe Danny himself!). I hope you enjoy the little language moments and the playful teasing — it was such a sweet request, and I loved bringing my culture into it. Thanks so much for reading! 💙

Danny Ramirez was never one to make assumptions about people. He liked to think he was pretty observant,after all, life had taught him that there’s always more beneath the surface. But somehow, for months, he had absolutely no clue that you, Y/N, were multilingual. You both lived in the same city, spoke English every day, and your conversations never hinted at anything beyond the usual chatter about work, weekend plans, and what show to binge next.

He thought he knew you well. He knew your favorite coffee order (black, no sugar), the way you crinkled your nose when you laughed, and your Netflix quirks,like how you always watched at least two episodes back to back and then acted surprised when it was midnight. But languages? That was a chapter in your story he had never read, and apparently, had no idea even existed.

It was a random Thursday afternoon, the kind of quiet day that slips by unnoticed. You were at Danny’s place, hunched over your laptop, trying to wrap up a last-minute work assignment. Danny was in the kitchen, cooking arroz con pollo, humming softly in Spanish as the smell of garlic and spices filled the apartment.

You had your phone pressed against your ear, speaking softly. Danny wasn’t paying much attention until he caught a few words that definitely weren’t English. The rhythm was sharp and melodic, unlike anything he’d heard from you before.

“Wait,” Danny said, eyebrows shooting up, “who are you talking to?”

You quickly ended the call, a slight blush coloring your cheeks. “Oh, just my family.”

Danny gave you a slow, deliberate nod, intrigued. “Family, huh? And what language was that? It wasn’t English.”

You hesitated for a second, then smiled lightly, almost embarrassed. “It’s Romanian.”

Danny’s eyes went wide, like he’d just discovered a secret passage. “Romanian? You never told me you spoke Romanian.”

You shrugged, trying to keep it casual. “I guess I just never needed to. We always speak English when we’re around each other.”

He shook his head, clearly stunned. “So all this time, you were… bilingual? Multilingual? What else don’t I know about you?”

You laughed, amused by his reaction. “Are you seriously shocked that someone can speak more than one language?”

He laughed too, but the surprise lingered in his eyes. “No, I mean,I didn’t know you spoke Romanian. You always seemed so local, you know?”

“Well, I am local. Just from a different background,” you explained. “It’s not something I bring up a lot because I switch to English with everyone else, especially you.”

Danny shook his head again, a grin spreading across his face. “So, I’ve been hanging out with a secret language ninja all this time.”

You smirked. “You could say that.”

A few days later, you decided to have a little fun with Danny’s newfound realization.

You were curled up on the couch watching a movie when suddenly you started muttering phrases in Romanian under your breath, almost as if you were talking to yourself.

Danny glanced over at you, confused. “What did you just say?”

You looked at him with mock innocence. “Nothing. Just… chatting.”

He narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “In Romanian?”

You giggled. “Maybe.”

Danny tried to catch a word, any phrase, but it all flew right over his head.

“Hey, I speak Spanish,” he said, trying to bridge the gap. “Maybe I can catch a word here and there.”

You raised an eyebrow playfully. “Oh really? Then what does ‘bună’ mean?”

Danny paused, thinking hard. “I don’t know… It sounds like ‘buena’ but I don’t think it’s the same thing.”

“Close,” you teased, a sly grin on your lips. “It means ‘hello.’”

Danny shook his head, smiling wide. “You’re totally messing with me.”

“Just a little,” you confessed, leaning back with a satisfied smile.

As the days passed, the language barrier became a sweet little game between you two. You’d slip into Romanian or a local dialect out of habit,or sometimes just to keep Danny on his toes.

One evening, you took Danny to a family gathering. The room buzzed with lively Romanian conversation, and Danny sat quietly, his expression somewhere between fascination and total confusion. The words danced around him, warm and fast.

At one point, one of your cousins joked in Romanian about Danny’s accent when he tried to say a word in their language. You burst out laughing.

Danny shrugged with a playful grin. “Hey, I’m trying here.”

You reached over and squeezed his hand. “I know you are. And I love that about you.”

The language thing turned into a kind of beautiful little dance. Danny would teach you Spanish idioms and slang, and you’d throw Romanian words back at him with a teasing smirk.

One quiet night, you caught Danny humming a Romanian folk song you’d sung softly once,almost as if the melody had settled into him without him realizing.

“You’re learning!” you said, mock surprise lighting your eyes.

Danny smiled shyly, rubbing the back of his neck. “I want to. For you.”

And in that moment, none of the languages mattered. Not Romanian, not Spanish, not even English.

The connection between you two was beyond words.

[roseandxanderfics]

"Always Been You" - Isaac Lahey x stoic!quiet!fem!reader

Summary: You’ve been Isaac’s one constant—his quiet best friend, his safe place. When he joins Scott’s pack and suddenly has people around who care, it should be a good thing. But he doesn’t like seeing them pull you in too. You’re his person. Right?

A/N: Based on this request 'Hey I love you "quiet ones" Liam fic so much. I don't know if you write for him, but could you maybe do one of a fem!reader of the same personality, but with Isaac?But maybe she's like his best friend already (and crush), and the only person he's friends with prior to being bitten. So when he joins the pack, he brings her along, but pretty quickly gets jealous because he's not used to seeing her talk to anyone. Then finally she bluntly reveals that she likes him back, or something like that :)'

----------

Before everything changed, it was always the two of you.

In the silent spaces between classes, in the empty bleachers during lacrosse practice, in the bruised shadows of Isaac’s bedroom after his father’s rages, you were there. Quiet. Still. Steady in ways no one else in his life had ever managed to be.

You were his best friend before he even realized he had one.

He met you in freshman year, the same week he showed up to school with a black eye he didn’t bother explaining. You sat beside him in science, didn’t talk much, didn’t ask questions, didn’t offer any soft pitying looks like everyone else. You just passed him a pen when he forgot his, and when he gave it back, you didn’t say you can keep it—you just gave him another one the next day.

That was the beginning.

You weren’t like Stiles. Not loud, not manic, not constant motion. You weren’t like Scott either—earnest, wide-eyed, heartbreakingly kind. You were… still. Watchful. A little intimidating. You only spoke when it mattered, and when you did, it wasn’t small talk—it was real.

Isaac clung to that like a life raft.

Over the next year, you became his safest place.

He never had to explain himself with you. Never had to pretend he wasn’t angry or scared or unraveling. He could just be. You didn’t try to fix him. You just showed up—sat next to him at lunch, waited at his locker, walked him home without ever being asked.

You weren’t just his friend.

You were his person.

So of course, when Isaac got bitten, you were the first person he told.

And when the world turned upside down, when he started seeing things and smelling fear and losing control of his own body—you didn’t flinch.

You just nodded. Took the information in. And said, “Okay. What do you need?”

Scott’s pack was warm. Loud. Full of light. Isaac didn’t know what to do with it.

It was like stepping into someone else’s life. One where people cared if you got hurt. One where group texts and game nights were normal, and nobody raised a hand unless it was to offer a hug or a snack or some badly timed joke.

He hated how much it terrified him.

Hated how badly he wanted it.

And hated, most of all, how fast you became part of it too.

You weren’t pack—not technically. But you showed up at every meeting. Watched every planning session with that same quiet intensity you always had. You weren’t loud or bossy or even particularly affectionate. You just… fit. Slipped into the background and anchored him in it.

Which is why Isaac noticed when your attention started to shift.

First it was Kira, sitting beside you at the McCall kitchen table, asking about your playlist and scribbling smiley faces in your notebook.

Then Lydia—offering to drive you home, giving you books she thought you’d like. You actually smiled at her. Smiled. Not wide, not showy, but it was real.

You didn’t even smile at him like that.

And then there was Stiles.

Always hanging around. Making stupid jokes. Talking a mile a minute. And you, somehow, tolerating him. Worse—you started responding. Not often, not much. But enough. A few dry one-liners. A blink-and-you’ll-miss-it chuckle when he tripped over his own feet.

Isaac hated it.

He hated it so much he could barely look at you sometimes.

Because for the first time in years, you weren’t just his anymore.

It all came to a head on a rainy Friday night at Scott’s place.

Movie night. Popcorn. Pillows everywhere. One of those normal things Isaac still wasn’t used to.

You were on the couch with Stiles. Again. Not touching, but close. Too close. You had a blanket over your legs, sleeves pulled over your hands like always, and your head tilted in that way that meant you were paying attention to the screen but listening to everything else.

Isaac stood in the doorway, watching.

Stiles leaned over and whispered something to you. You didn’t laugh, but your lips twitched.

Isaac couldn’t breathe.

He turned around and left.

You found him twenty minutes later, sitting on the porch steps in the rain.

You didn’t say anything. Just dropped beside him, pulled your knees to your chest, and waited.

Eventually, he spoke. Low. Frayed.

“Do you like him?”

You didn’t look at him. “Who?”

“Stiles.”

You blinked at the streetlight. “No.”

Isaac let out a bitter breath. “You talk to him more than me lately.”

A pause.

Then: “I didn’t think it would bother you.”

His head snapped toward you. “Of course it bothers me.”

You turned. Looked at him, finally. Eyes dark, unreadable.

“You’re jealous.”

It wasn’t a question.

He tried to scoff. Tried to play it off. But he couldn’t.

Because you saw him. Too well. Too deep.

“I just…” He trailed off. Looked away. “I liked it better when it was just us.”

You were quiet for a long time.

Then, gently: “Me too.”

His chest tightened. “Then why…?”

“Because I thought you were pulling away. After the bite. After Scott. I thought you didn’t need me like before.”

Isaac swallowed hard. “That’s not true.”

You looked down at your hands. Your voice was softer now. Almost uncertain.

“You never said anything.”

Silence stretched.

Rain dripped off the porch roof.

Then, with a breathless kind of desperation: “I didn’t know how.”

He turned to face you fully, eyes wide, raw.

“You’re my best friend. My only friend for a long time. You’re the only person who’s ever looked at me and didn’t see some broken, angry mess.”

You didn’t flinch. Didn’t speak.

He pushed on. “And then Scott came along and suddenly I had this whole new world, and it was terrifying, but you were still there. You’ve always been there. Even when I didn’t deserve it. And I—”

He broke off, voice cracking.

“I think I’ve been in love with you since the day you handed me a pen and didn’t say anything.”

You blinked. Once. Twice.

Then, quietly:

“I know.”

Isaac’s breath caught.

You turned to him again, closer now. Knees brushing.

“You think I’m quiet because I don’t feel anything.” A small shake of your head. “But I do. I just don’t say things unless I mean them.”

Isaac nodded, slowly. Eyes locked to yours.

“And I mean this,” you said.

Then leaned forward, voice barely a whisper:

“I love you too.”

Later, he’ll think about how soft that moment was. How gentle. Like finally exhaling after years of holding his breath.

You didn’t kiss him right away.

You just leaned your forehead against his.

And it felt more intimate than anything.

“I’m yours,” you whispered.

He clutched your hand like a lifeline.

“You’ve always been mine,” he whispered back.

And this time, you didn’t pull away.

[despicablebisexual]

Fake Out

Roronoa Zoro x f!strawhat!reader, one-shot, established relationship, fluff, hurt/comfort

Why did they all have to split up one day? They just got back together, now everyone is thinking of leaving again. Why couldn't Zoro just have everyone under one roof where he could keep an eye on and protect all of them?

Zoro isn't prepared to talk about your future.

----------------------

fic warnings: very small pre-time skip Sabaody spoilers, small time skip spoilers, background Franky/Robin and Usopp/Kaya (if you don't like idc), takes place at the end of fishman island

With a big, sloppy kiss to his cheek, you stumbled away from Zoro and back to Robin and Nami, drunk enough to not have any shame in front of your friends. Before you could get too far though, he playfully swatted your ass, silently thanking you for bringing him another bottle of sake to enjoy.

“Do ya have to do that in front of us?” Usopp murmured, side eyeing the resident swordsman of their crew.

Zoro popped the top of the bottle off and took a big swig. After several seconds of chugging, he finally released with an exuberant gasp, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “Yup.”

Usopp rolled his eyes while Franky chuckled. “C’mon buddy, they're young and in love, let the man live!”

Usopp shook his head while Franky laughed and patted him on the shoulder. Zoro settled in next to Franky, passing the bottle to him as he got comfortable leaning back on the wall behind the bench the three of them were sharing.

“It’s not like we haven’t all heard you reading your letters from Kaya out loud in the workshop,” Zoro pointed out, resting his arms behind his head.

Usopp squealed. “T-Those are personal!”

“Maybe don’t be so loud then, sugar lips.”

Franky and Zoro laughed while Usopp stuttered, failing to deny the pet name Kaya used for him. Instead, he swiped the sake bottle from Franky, feeling too sober and exposed.

In front of them, the party the people of Fishman Island threw for them raged on, drinks and food flowing freely while people enjoyed the entertainment. Luffy sat with Jinbe and Shirahoshi, laughing as Jinbe recounted stories of his childhood. Robin and Nami sipped drinks and cheered you on as Prince Fuakboshi twirled you around in a respectful dance, while Chopper tried to stop Brook and Sanji from making utter fools of themselves in front of the mermaids. 

The party was a great joint celebration: the people of Fishman Island had been saved, and the Strawhats were reunited after a long two years apart. Zoro couldn’t be happier, after all, he had good booze, great friends, and his beautiful partner all surrounding him. While he had grown during his two years with Mihawk, nothing could compare to the serenity of this moment.

Franky smiled to himself as he watched Robin take a bite of an exotic fruit offered to her by one of the mermaids. His eyes lingered on her smile and the way her head tilted as she studied the taste. 

“Good times, huh bros?”

Usopp hummed in agreement and Zoro nodded. 

“You know,” Franky took back the bottle from Usopp and took a drink, “I was thinking about stuff while we were all apart.”

“Like what?” Usopp questioned.

“Just about what we’ll do when this is all over.”

“You mean the party?”

“No, no, I mean our days at sea. Once the Sunny has sailed all the way through the New World and Luffy’s done the whole king-of-the-pirates thing, I’ve got plans.”

Zoro’s good eye slid over in Franky’s direction, curiosity piqued. “Which are?”

Franky took another big swig. Whatever it must have been, made him nervous. Outside his regular cola intake, Franky didn’t drink much.

“I’m taking Robin back to her home island.”

Usopp gasped. “Ohara? But it was destroyed when she was a child!”

Franky smiled softly, eyes gleaming as he watched you pass off Prince Fukaboshi to Robin. “I know, but I’m going to rebuild it for her. She’s talked about the library that used to be there and I can tell she misses it. Plus, she’ll need somewhere to store all her research on the poneglyphs once we find the One Piece.”

Usopp and Zoro took in the heavy weight of Franky’s pledge. It was known how much he cared for their resident archaeologist, his declarations of love for her not missed by any of the crew, nor her returned affections. Yet they were still so surprised that the promise of rebuilding her home was so resolute, like Franky knew that if Robin asked for the moon, he could deliver it. The resolve in his voice astounded his two crewmates listening in.

“I see…” Usopp replied, resting a finger on his chin in thought. “Well, I’m going back home to the East Blue to tell Kaya all about our adventures! I’ll show her the man I’ve become.”

“Yow! How super!” Franky laughed. The two innovators shared a laugh, throwing their arms around each other and smiling.

“What about you, bro?” Franky held the bottle of sake out to Zoro. “Got any plans for you and Y/N?”

For once in his life, Zoro hesitated as someone handed him a bottle of booze. In the green glass of the bottle, he could see your face from across the banquet hall. A distorted, sparkling reflection as you giggled at Nami’s drunkenness, even if you weren’t far behind her.

Got any plans for you and Y/N?

Plans? What plans? The only plan he had for the future was to find another bottle of sake when this one finished, then maybe steal a kiss from you before he turned in for the night. Who would waste time daydreaming about the future when he had the present, especially when everything was a toss up. As far as he was concerned, the only surefire event to happen in his future would be him finally defeating Mihawk in battle. Nothing else could happen until that did.

He took the bottle from Franky, eyebrows deeply furrowed. “...Nah.”

Franky and Usopp shared a questioning look. Surely the two of you had some sort of idea of what you wanted your lives to look like after your pirate days ended.

A sea of giggling erupted as you and Robin approached, the two of you sharing a secret behind your hands. As you neared, you shushed each other, making some sort of silent vow to keep the boys out of the loop.

“Oh, Usopp,” you giggled. “Brook has your slingshot.”

The sniper suddenly went stiff before hurriedly patting all his pockets. Yep, the slingshot was gone, and a distinct yohohoho could be heard across the hall.

“He’s lucky he’s already dead…” Usopp stood up quickly and ran off.

Robin and you shared another smile, before the two of you turned towards Franky and Zoro.

“Franky.”

Franky perked up. “Yes?”

One of Robin’s hands sprouted from the wall and playfully flicked Franky on the nose. “Come dance.”

Franky scrambled to his feet. “Yes ma’am!”

The two rushed back out to the hall, hands already grabbing each other as they made their way to the dance floor. When they faded from sight, you turned back to Zoro, whose good eye was already peeled and staring at you.

“What’s with the look?” he smirked.

You feigned ignorance. “What look?”

“That look. Like you’ve got some wicked plan.”

You grinned and stalked toward him, letting him pull you into his lap sideways. “I’ve got no idea what you mean.”

He scoffed and rolled his eyes yet still smiled as you settled into place. You leaned in and kissed him, Zoro returning the kiss slowly.

“Mm,” you sighed when you released, eyes sparkling up in adoration at Zoro. “I love it here.”

“Yeah?” His hand came down and rested on your thigh, holding you close. 

You turned toward the vastness of the ocean to Zoro’s right. In the night, the corals and seaweed ebbed softly, basking in the moonlight. Schools of fish swam by, carefully navigating their way through. You’d only been on the island for a day, but the place had captivated you.

“Yes. I mean, the food, the people, even with the coup today, I still think this place is wonderful.” Zoro couldn’t help but notice the way your eyes widened as you spoke. “I’d love to learn more about their queen. Jinbe told me about her mission to move the island to the surface, but I can’t help but wish I could stay here. It’s just so… Beautiful in its isolation. No World Government meddling here.”

Zoro nodded along. It was a vastly different place down here, and he could respect the different way of life from that of the surface.

“I don’t know,” you sighed. “It’s just the kind of place–”

“You could imagine yourself living in?”

You blushed as Zoro took the words out of your mouth. “Well… Maybe.”

Suddenly, Zoro was frowning. It dawned on him then that the two of you had never had a discussion about your future. Did you see a future with him? Would you want him to live here on Fishman Island with you? His thoughts began spiraling. 

Would he feel content? Honest to god, he never saw himself having a full time residence outside of his village back in the East Blue or on the Sunny. Could the world’s greatest swordsman be fine with spending his days 10,000 meters below the surface? 

Would you even feel happy with him? If your goal was to rebuild the world government one day and turn it into an organization that actually took care of its people, surely you’d settle down in some place like Mariejois and spend your days with people like Jinbe, focusing on leading the world into a better age. You wouldn’t want to be stuck with a meathead like Zoro, tied down with domestic responsibilities when you really just wanted to help people.

Even if the two of you did choose to settle down here for the rest of your lives, where did the rest of the Strawhats fit into that equation? Would Luffy visit you? Would Zoro ever get to share a beer with Usopp again? Feel the harsh back of Nami’s hand after he said something stupid? Would he have to long for Sanji’s cooking, as much as he hated to admit it?

Why did they all have to split up one day? They just got back together, now everyone is thinking of leaving again. Why couldn’t Zoro just have everyone under one roof where he could keep an eye on and protect all of them?

“Hey, what’s wrong?”

Your hand on his cheek and soft voice snapped Zoro out of his downward spiral. “Nothin’.”

You frowned at him, lifting your eyebrows up in your characteristic bullshit face. “You sure?”

He adjusted you on his lap, holding you closer, more possessively. “Yep.”

You watched as Zoro turned away and bit his lip in worry. Zoro never bit his lip in worry. What was going through that moss head of his? “You know… We’re all alone out here with a bottle of sake,” you drawled, fingers creeping up the front of his shirt.

“Mhmm.” He still didn’t look your way.

“Luffy’s only been eating for about three hours, so we’ve still got plenty of party time left.” You left a chaste, yet yearning kiss on Zoro’s jaw. “The Sunny is empty right now… Why don’t we take the booze and head back to the ship?”

He didn’t respond.

“Okay.” You got up suddenly from his lap. “You’re acting weird. What’s wrong?”

Zoro stared at you with a deep frown on his face, his good eye filled with worry, anger, and most of all, hopelessness.

“Zo.” Much quieter, you kneeled in front of him and took his hands. “What’s wrong?”

He tensed up, staring down at you for a second before ripping his hands from yours and cradling his head. “Don’t marry Jinbe!”

You were stunned into silence. “What?”

“Listen,” Zoro began talking with his hands. “I get he’s smarter than me and a freaking diplomat, but you can’t marry him!”

You let out a dry laugh. “What are you talking about?”

Zoro stood up and turned, stomping towards the balcony overlooking the ocean.

“Zoro!” You followed after him, stopping just one step behind him, giving him his space. “Are… Are you jealous of Jinbe?”

“No!” he barked over his shoulder. “Maybe! I don’t know!”

He kept himself facing away from you, not bothering to look back as he responded. With a gentle hand, you carefully touched his back, testing the water. When he didn’t shrug you off, you slowly slid it around until your arms encircled his back.

“Why are you jealous of Jinbe? I’m not going to marry him. I just met him today.”

“I’m not jealous,” he huffed, still staring out at the sea. “I just…”

“Just..?”

He took a deep breath, gathering the courage to be vulnerable. “I just… Don’t want you to leave. Or anyone. I want us all to stay together.”

“Zo…”

“I can keep care of everyone when we’re all together. I don’t like all this separation bullshit.” You listened to him talk, giving him the space to vent all his frustrations. “We’re a crew. We’re not meant to be apart.”

You listened carefully, thinking of the implication behind his words. “You’re still thinking of Sabaody, aren’t you?”

His body stiffened, but he didn’t deny the accusation.

You let go of him and put your hands on his shoulders. “Look at me.”

He turned slowly, barely meeting your gaze in the darkness. When your hands rested on his chest, he grabbed your waist out of reflex.

“Our crew isn’t going anywhere,” you reassured him. “Not for a long time.”

He huffed. “Well everyone seems intent on leaving piracy behind one day.”

You looked to your left and through the doors of the banquet hall where all of your crewmates still entertained themselves. The dishes next to Luffy were rising, Jinbe and Chopper marveling at the sight. Nami was surrounded by several of the king’s guards, schooling them in a game of poker. Robin and Franky languidly danced together, Franky doing his best to not mess up the moves. Sanji, Brook, and Usopp gathered around a piano, joined by the star singer, and sang a song together. 

“I get it. I don’t want to be apart from them either.” You turned back to him and dug a finger into his chest. “I don’t want to be apart from you.”

Zoro’s shoulders slouched, and he leaned down to rest his forehead on yours. “But you’re the toughest nail to pin down of them all,” he whispered.

You laughed. “Why me?”

He leaned back and looked down into your eyes, his grip on your waist tightening. “Are you kidding me? You’re the one with all these crazy plans and opportunities. Everywhere we go, in every country we save, the leaders want you to come be their ambassador, or want to hand you their throne. I’m starting to think I’m going to have to chain you to the mast so you don’t run off with them.”

Zoro and you shared a soft chuckle, though there was a sadness in his eyes. “I’m just starting to realize how big your plans are.”

“And you want to know if you’re part of them, don’t you?”

He didn’t respond. For once in his life, Roronoa Zoro didn’t want to hear what you had to say, too scared his worst beliefs would be confirmed.

“Yeah…”

You took his jaw in hand and turned his face toward the sea. “Do you see that out there, Zo? See how big the sea is?”

He studied the expanse in front of him. The ocean extended far beyond his eyesight, seeming as if it would never end. He nodded in understanding, though he was confused by why you chose now to bring it up.

“No matter how far that sea goes, no matter where the Sunny travels, no matter where I go, I imagine you there, standing next to me.”

He slowly turned his head back to you. “You do?”

You nodded your head resolutely, reminding him of the determination he saw in Franky’s eyes not that long ago. Would you give him the moon if he asked? 

“Rain or shine, in sickness or in health. Nothing matters if I don’t have you with me.”

He studied the look on your face. Zoro was so used to seeing your soft, adoring side that he sometimes forgot what a fierce, determined tactician you could be. Whenever the Straw Hats visited countries down on their luck, you always managed to take the monarchs by their reins and show them the path forward, a job that sometimes required you to be stern. Now, you had the same look on your face as you demolished his worries.

But your fierce look of determination broke, and a small, gentle smile broke out on your face. A look you reserved exclusively for Zoro during tender moments like these. “That is, if you’ll have me.”

In one fell swoop he pulled you close and pressed his lips to yours, curling his entire body around you like he was set on keeping you this way forever. Your arms circled his neck, holding his face closer to yours as your lips moved against each other. Even when your lungs began to burn, you still kept him close, not wanting to part again.

Zoro parted first, staring down at you. “Only an idiot would pass up a chance like that.”

You leaned into the hand cupping your face, smiling at him widely. For the first time since your crew reunited in Sabaody, you could see the tension leave his body.

“Hey! Will you two get a room?” Nami yelled from the open doorway. She sat down inelegantly, roughly landing on her bottom. Behind her, Usopp and Chopper carried a love-drunk Sanji out the doors and towards the stairs.

You waved her off, then turned back to Zoro, giving him another peck on the lips. “Let’s go spend some time with our crew.” You broke from your embrace, leading him towards the growing group.

Zoro threw an arm around your shoulders and secured you to his side, smiling down at you when you glanced up at him Before you got close though, he leaned down and whispered in your ear, “in sickness or in health, huh? Guess that means we’re married now.”

You elbowed him in the ribs. “Nuh uh, you’re not getting out of proposing to me for real, Roronoa. You wanna be forever? You better put in the work then.”Zoro crumpled from the pain of your hit. “Good god, woman…”

[writersmacchiato]

pour you a drink | teddy spencer x reader (i know what you did last summer 2025)

Summary: You’re a part time bartender at Ray’s Bar. There you become acquainted with Teddy Spencer.

Warnings: i hope his personality isn’t too ooc, i apologize if it is!, brief make out scene, unnecessary reader background (you can skip tbh), mention of alcohol and drinking, I think that’s it

. . .

Teddy’s life had gone to shit within a year. And it all started on fucking July 4th of all days. The downward spiral was gradual until Danica had no choice but to leave him behind. He couldn’t even blame her. The fault was his alone.

His new life on his dad’s houseboat wasn’t too bad. He could smoke, drink all he wanted. Alone.

Sometimes he went to Ray’s Bar just to have the background of people talking. He couldn’t admit to himself that he was lonely. Telling himself the change of scenery was nice.

You always got a glass and poured his drink of choice when you saw him, pushing it over the counter with a smile.

Sometimes he thought about that smile. More than he should.

. . .

Teddy Spencer walked through the bar, eyes finding you immediately.

You feel warm under his watch but pull out a glass and his preferred liquor, already sliding it across the counter by the time he’s settled onto a stool.

“Hey Teddy.”

“Hey.”

It’s like clockwork now.

At first, he came in rarely, with a cloud over his head. His tail tucked between his legs. But, then he came in more and more (Stevie told you about Danica’s new fiancé Wyatt) until you came to expect him.

Stevie had asked if you wouldn’t mind serving him when he came and you agreed with little questions after she gave a short explanation involving her dad. Shitty friends after a shitty situation is, well… shitty. You got it. Working the bar was just your evening gig anyway, extra cash. No questions asked. Ray was nice enough. You liked that Stevie had someone paternal looking after her.

You’d been on edge when Teddy first started stopping by. Thinking of his loud mouth self from high school, the limited interactions you held, and the perspectives from other people who weren’t fans of the Spencer family.

But slowly, so slowly you didn’t even realize it was happening until it was too late, Teddy grew on you.

The Teddy of before was not the man that sat before you now. He was quieter, serious, grieving. There were glimmers, on good days, of his past self. A certain smile or laugh that warmed your chest.

He would crack a joke and sit and talk if the night was slow, maybe, if he was in a good mood. Mostly he would thank you for the drink, pay his tab, and go sit in a corner nursing his drink until it was gone. Then he would leave.

Tonight, he doesn’t have anything teasing to say. But he doesn’t walk away. You refill an order down the bar and drift back over, casually wiping down a glass.

“So.”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“You don’t even know what I was going to say!”

“Everyone is talking about Danica’s splash bridal party!”

“Actually, I was going to ask if you liked your drink. I changed it.”

Teddy blinks, looking down at his drink as if just seeing it for the first time, then back to you. He takes a drink, holding the eye contact. You feel the urge to fidget but force yourself to keep still.

“It’s good.” He finally says. “What is it?”

“The usual, with a squeeze of lime in it.”

He makes a face, scrunching his eyebrows.

“I panicked.” You sigh. “I was going to ask if you were okay because yes, I’ve heard literally everyone, I mean everyone, even old man Billy, talking about Danica and Wyatt. And, I just… wanted to make sure you were okay?”

He doesn’t say anything, continuing to stare.

So you fill the silence, your inner voice begging you to shut up.

“Which obviously you’re not. Because why would you be? This must fucking suck and I’m sorry for bringing it up. Um, drink is on the house tonight..?” You trail off, feeling like jumping off the dock into the water might ease your embarrassment but only if you sunk to the bottom.

“You’re the first person to ask me if I’m okay.” Teddy says. “And no, I’m not okay.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” You cringe levels are returning to a normal range. Maybe you didn’t fuck that up?

“Honestly no. But… it means a lot to me that you asked, so thank you.”

. . .

Stevie invited you to Danica’s bridal shower but you declined because thankfully you had to work your day job at the visitor gift shop. Super unglamorous but busy enough to be mindless.

Instead after your shift ends, you find yourself walking along the water. Seeing a familiar figure lounging on a dock with several empty beer cans out.

“Mind if I crash your party?” You call out.

Teddy looks up and shields his eyes from the sun, you don’t want to be presumptuous but you think his eyes light up. He stands up with a grin, holding two cans of beer.

“I’d like that.” His hand brushes yours when he hands it over.

You study the label. It’s local. “Oh thank god. I would’ve been pissed if this was an IPA.”

“Fuck no. I don’t hate myself that much.”

He laughs and you join him. You settle into the chair adjacent to him, legs crossing as you take him in. He looks tired, hair ruffled, clothes obviously the first thing he saw. But he looks… okay.

“I’m only going to ask once and then I’ll let it be. How are you feeling?”

Teddy takes a drink from his can, swirling the liquid around with his hand for a moment. Finally he says,

“I just hope she’s happy. And if she is, then I guess I’m okay. Or, I will be okay.”

“Are you happy?”

He looks at you with that certain look you can’t decipher.

“Yeah, sometimes.”

. .

You’ve gone through a case of beer easily, collecting the cans in a bag to discard later. You have a nice buzz, almost on the cusp of drunkenness but sober enough to notice that Teddy has eliminated all personal space between you.

He attempted to recreate the drink you make for him in his mini bar setup but it tasted like straight gasoline.

Instead he served two glasses of lemon water and was staring at you in a way that you were certainly not misinterpreting.

“You’re a really good bartender.” He says softly.

“Thanks.”

“Why do you work there?”

“Because I don’t have a rich daddy?”

“No, I mean… you’re smart, funny. You could work anywhere. Why there?”

“I don’t know. Ray needed seasonal help for the summer and I thought fuck it, why not? It’s better than being alone in my shitty apartment.”

“What about your family?” Teddy asks.

“Dad died when I was 12. Then mom remarried and had new children that she focused on. She’s a really good mom, just not to me. I think it’s too painful for her to be around me. Like all she sees is my dad.

“Then Luke, my stepdad technically, decided it would be better for his kids to grow up closer to his hometown in Maine. So, I haven’t seen them since.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah.” You finish the water in your hand, wiping the condensation against your shorts.

“I think your mom is an idiot for not seeing how great you are to be around.”

“Yeah sure.” You huff a laugh.

“I’m serious. You… you’ve helped me a lot these past few months.”

“By serving you alcoholic beverages?”

“You gave a shit. About me. The drinks were a bonus.”

“I do care about you Teddy.”

“I know.” He smiles.

Your thigh is touching his, feeling the warmth emit through his pants. If you leaned in, you could count the freckles on his cheek.

“I don’t want to be your rebound.” You say.

The words had come out without thinking and only once you’ve said them do you realize how true it is. How much you want this. Want him.

“You’re not a rebound. You’re… so much more.” Teddy says. He runs a hand over his hair, he looks nervous. “I’ve wanted to kiss you since the first night I saw you.”

“Then kiss me.”

He leans in slow, careful. His mouth is warm and soft against yours, sliding your bottom lip between his. You break away for a breath, his lips chasing you, filling the gap.

The pace is faster, his hands finding purchase on your neck, cheek, thumb caressing. Shocks of fire are racing through your bloodstream. Your lower stomach starting to coil in warmth.

All this from a kiss?

You’re down bad.

He moans into the kiss when your hands find his hair and give a small, gentle tug. One hand stays supporting your neck, the other traveling down to your waistline, fingers slipping underneath your shirt.

“Is this okay?” He pulls away, all movement paused. He’ll stop if you want him to, you see his seriousness in his eyes. Pupils blown wide.

“Yes.” You whisper, hand sliding across his thin gold chain. You use it to pull his mouth back against yours, enjoying the groan he lets out.

His hand continues the journey under your shirt, slowly feeling the smooth skin. Your own hands are reaching for the buttons on his shirt, ready to reveal his chest.

Then Teddy stops, pulling away, and cocking his head toward the door.

Your heart is thundering in your chest, skin feeling too warm for your body.

And then you hear it. The creaking of footsteps on the wooden dock leading to the boat.

The living space is open view and you easily see Stevie’s shocked face when she spots you underneath Teddy, shirt pushed up, lips kiss bitten.

Ava and Milo look stunned.

“Fuck.” Teddy mutters.

He fixes your shirt, nothing but gentle as he helps you stand.

“Why the fuck are you here?” Teddy breaks the silence of the trio.

Ava steps forward, an envelope in her hand. Her eyes dart towards you and you know whatever they have to say is not for your ears.

“I should go.”

“If anyone’s leaving, it’s them.” Teddy holds a hand out to stop you, and it’s all you can do not to look at his hand and remember the warmth as he felt you up only minutes ago.

With a glance to Milo and Stevie, Ava hands the envelope to Teddy. You glimpse the words as he opens it:

I know what you did last summer

. . .

[deliciousangelfestival]

The Malicious Daughter Is Back! - 4

Character : Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader

Summary: It's just a business marriage. Bucky thought it would be easy until he encountered the stepsister of his fiancée. She turned his world upside down.

The Malicious Daughter Is Back! Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist || Support : Ko-fi 🙏🏻

Thank you to everyone who has read this chapter. Leave a comment and Reblog, please. I'd love to hear your thoughts. ❤️

Bucky was speechless after you kissed his hand, even though it was through the leather gloves.

You let go of his hand. "Was that too much? Sorry, I’m just overwhelmed by the offer you gave."

“I take that as a yes?” Bucky asked, still processing.

“Well yeah, didn’t I seal it by kissing your hand? I thought it was clear.” You smiled, a hint of playfulness in your eyes.

Bucky chuckled softly. "That's a new way to accept an offer, but joke aside, I’m grateful you accepted."

You lowered your guard, leaning back slightly. "So what happens next? I have to say, I won’t do anything that makes me a homewrecker."

“Oh gosh, nothing like that,” Bucky reassured you, his tone earnest.

“That’s a relief.” You let out a breath, feeling more at ease.

Suddenly, Bucky's phone rang. He picked it up and saw the caller ID: "Victoria." He bit the inside of his cheek, not wanting to talk to her at this moment. However, he didn't want to ignore the call either, as his fiancée would quickly learn that he had no feelings for her.

He excused himself to answer the call. "Hello?"

"Hello, my fiancé. I apologize for bothering you, but I heard something that doesn't sit quite right with me. I heard that you are with my older sister?" Victoria asked, her voice calm and cheerful, though her perfectly manicured fingers were crumpling a few papers nervously on the other end.

Bucky felt like he had just been caught cheating. "I am. I have something to discuss with her because of what happened last night."

"Oh, I see. Alright, I won’t bother you. See you soon." Victoria ended the call, smirking as she looked at her phone. She knew Bucky's reputation—quiet and calm but ruthless if disrespected. She remembered how you embarrassed him last night and thought perhaps he was giving you a warning.

Victoria felt a tickle of satisfaction, believing Bucky understood her without her needing to lift a finger. She felt lucky to have him as her fiancé.

Bucky, not entirely sure what had just transpired, felt relieved that Victoria didn't seem suspicious and quickly ended the call.

He returned to you and saw you chatting with the waitress and his secretary. In seconds, you had already become close to new people.

Unlike you, Bucky’s circle of friends all had to undergo background checks before he could trust them.

"Let’s talk in the car. I’ll drop you off," Bucky suggested.

"Sure," you agreed, thinking this would save you transportation money.

Inside the luxurious car, you felt like you were being enveloped by the comfortable seat. Even if you worked for 20 years on your teacher’s salary, you wouldn’t be able to afford this car.

Bucky wore his reading glasses and read a document. He spoke to you without lifting his head. "Tomorrow, after your school is over, I’ll pick you up, and we'll meet my psychiatrist."

You raised your eyebrows in surprise.

Bucky explained, "He knows my condition, and I hope bringing you to meet him will help us find a solution." His voice sounded serious, a little desperate.

"Have you had this disorder since you were little?" you asked.

He flinched, his hand stopping mid-motion as he was about to flip the paper. "It started when I was 12 years old," Bucky replied, his voice tinged with a hint of vulnerability.

His expression turned grieving. You knew this was the moment to stop asking questions; after all, you’d just met him for the second time. There’s a limit to how personal you can get with someone you barely know.

🥀🥀🥀🥀

The car stopped in front of a small house. It looked old but cozy, especially the garden with its many flowers. Bucky wondered if it was you who took care of all the roses.

You rolled your eyes, "It was my grandma who has the green thumb."

Bucky glanced at the flowers. "Pretty. I’m grateful for your cooperation, but I hope none of this gets leaked to outsiders."

So he was giving you a warning. You made a gesture of zipping your lips. "My lips are sealed." Then you closed the car door and headed to your house.

After he saw you enter the house, he told his driver to start the car.

You watched the car drive away from behind the curtain.

"Is that your boyfriend, my Ophelia?" The cheerful voice of an older woman startled you. You jumped, turning to see your grandma, Cassandra, standing beside you.

She smiled at you, happiness evident in her eyes, but you couldn't share her joy. To your grandmother, you were her daughter, Ophelia, your mother, who had passed away years ago.

Life had been cruel to her, taking away her only daughter, her son-in-law ignored her, and her business at the same time, which took a significant toll on her. The final blow was dementia.

She didn’t remember you at all. At 70 years old, her mind had regressed to when she was 40. Because of the striking resemblance between you and your mother, she thought you were Ophelia.

You sighed and put on a smile for her. "No, he's just a friend."

Cassandra giggled. "Really? Your father will be jealous when he hears this. Uhuk... uhuk..." She started coughing. You bring her to sit on her chair.

Your heart clenched each time you heard your grandma cough. It was getting worse.

She needed surgery, but you didn't have the money.

Having a rich father like Jonathan was useless because you didn't have access to your money. The reason was clear: Genevieve and Victoria.

She really hated you and wanted you to starve to death.

You quickly put a blanket on Cassandra lap and turned on the air humidifier to help ease her cough.

As you added the eucalyptus and lemongrass essential oil into the humidifier, your eyes caught the family photo on the wall. It was a picture of your family—your dad, your mom, and your grandparents—standing in front of your childhood home. Everyone was gathered to celebrate your birthday. But now, it was all just a memory.

You clenched your fist, feeling a surge of determination. Soon, you would get what was supposed to be yours.

💋💋💋💋

The next day after school, you went with Bucky to see the psychiatrist. But before that, the school was in an uproar because of the clothes you were wearing. You, who always dressed like a vampire hunter in jeans, combat boots, a grey shirt, and a black jacket, were now wearing a casual outfit with a vintage aesthetic.

You wore a cream-colored blouse tucked into a high-waisted plaid skirt paired with brown loafers and a light brown blazer with elbow patches. Your hair was styled in soft waves, and you carried a small leather satchel. The change in your appearance left everyone talking.

Jimmy couldn’t believe you were the same teacher who always yelled at him. “Who are you?”

You replied with a smirk, “Your worst nightmare.”

Everyone nodded in agreement. Despite your elegant outfit, you still commanded authority.

Bucky also noticed the change in your appearance. “You look different.”

You explained, “I don’t want your psychiatrist to think that I could be a bad influence on you.”

“Fair point,” he nodded in agreement.

After a while, both of you arrived at the destination, a fancy clinic. The receptionist, already accustomed to Bucky's appointments, greeted him warmly. “He’s waiting for you.”

Bucky led you to the room, which was bright and comfortable, conducive to a relaxed atmosphere. The walls were painted in calming colors and adorned with abstract art, and the furniture was modern yet inviting.

There was already someone sitting in the chair, holding a pen and a writing board. It was Dr. Javier, who had known Bucky for a long time.

Javier waited until both Bucky and you were seated. "You told me that you had a breakthrough. Is it her?" he inquired.

Bucky nodded, taking off his leather gloves and putting on a pulse oximeter on his finger. He then reached for your hand, and you placed yours in his.

Javier widened his eyes and adjusted his glasses. Bucky showed no signs of panic attacks, and his pulse appeared normal. "Wow. Incredible. How long has this been happening?" Javier asked.

Bucky replied, "Three days."

"After you touched her, you mentioned trying to shake somebody else's hand. Did the panic attacks suddenly reappear then?" Javier inquired further.

Bucky confirmed, "Yes."

Javier wondered what made you so special. Suddenly, he moved closer to you without warning.

You exclaimed, "What the-?"

“Interesting,” Javier nodded. “I can think of one reason: your body fragrance.”

You were taken aback. Did you really smell bad? You started sniffing your clothes. They were still new; you had only worn them three times, and they had been dry cleaned.

Then you remembered, “I am surrounded by buckets of sweat and cigarettes.”

Being around students who smoked and sweated a lot due to their frequent sports activities made you open all the classroom windows to get rid of the smell.

Bucky found it difficult to accept that his disorder could be triggered by your body odor.

Javier felt as though four eyes were judging him. He cleared his throat. “Ahem. Your case is one of a kind, Bucky. Perhaps her scent doesn’t trigger your trauma—” He didn’t continue when he felt someone glaring at him.

Trauma? Bucky’s trauma? You wondered what Javier meant.

Bucky crossed his arms and changed the subject. “So the solution to my disorder is the smell of a locker room?”

Javier raised both arms, trying to calm down his patient's anger. “I’m not saying it’s the solution, but it could be.”

Bucky sighed heavily. What kind of nonsense was this? But the way he met you was also out of the blue. His life is full of surprises now.

Author Note: Poor Cassandra. 🥺 Also the reader is a non-smoker.

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[merry-ange]

⸻

Title: “The Quiet Corner”

Pairing: Carmen Berzatto x Reader

Setting: Family-style barbecue at someone’s home — loud, crowded, chaotic

Vibe: Soft, comforting, sensory-safe love

⸻

It was loud. Too loud.

The kind of gathering where everyone talked over each other, laughter bounced off the walls, and the music played just a bit too loud in the background to mask the awkwardness of small talk. Kids ran through the backyard in circles, high on soda and watermelon, while the adults gathered in huddles around beer coolers and folding chairs.

You tried. You really did.

You stayed beside Carmen for the first twenty minutes, smiled politely as he introduced you to a few people — old cooks from past jobs, a cousin visiting from out of town, someone from high school who now ran a food truck.

But slowly, that invisible weight crept up your spine.

Too many voices. Too many eyes. Too many questions you couldn’t quite answer without overthinking it all.

So you slipped away.

Found yourself in the shade beneath a tree, where a group of kids were lining up for face paint. You knelt to help one of the younger ones tie their shoe. It was easier to be needed by them the tiny hands, the loud honesty, the simplicity. When a toddler waddled over and lifted their arms toward you without hesitation, you lifted them into your arms instinctively.

She nestled into your shoulder like she belonged there.

And you just… breathed.

You didn’t notice Carmen was watching until you felt the shift in the air beside you.

“Hey,” he said gently, sliding up beside the tree with two paper cups in hand one water, one soda. “Didn’t see you sneak off.”

You gave a small smile, rocking the baby on your hip. “Needed a break. It got kinda… loud.”

He handed you the water without asking. “Yeah. It’s a lot. Even for me.”

You met his gaze, surprised. “You? Mr. Kitchen Chaos?”

Carmy grinned, soft and crooked. “The kitchen makes sense. This doesn’t.”

You laughed under your breath and adjusted the baby’s head as she started falling asleep against your shoulder. “I always end up with the kids at these things. I guess it’s easier. They don’t expect too much.”

He nodded, watching you like you were sunlight filtering through branches. “They love you.”

“She just needed somewhere quiet to nap.”

“No,” he said, quieter now. “She picked you. Out of all the chaos, she saw you and knew you were safe.”

You blinked, caught off guard by how tenderly he said it.

Carmy glanced around at the party, then leaned his shoulder against the tree beside you, close enough to feel the warmth of him, but not enough to crowd.

“You ever think about that?” he murmured. “How you make people feel… safe?”

You smiled down at the baby in your arms. “No. I usually just feel awkward.”

“Well,” he said, with a tilt of his head. “I usually feel like I’m going to implode in these settings. But not when I’m with you.”

You looked up.

Carmy’s gaze was steady. “I’d rather be here, under a tree with you, holding a baby, than anywhere else in that backyard.”

You smirked. “Even if there’s smoked ribs and three kinds of pie?”

“Especially then,” he said, eyes crinkling. “Because now I get to bring you a plate and look like a goddamn hero.”

You laughed, careful not to jostle the sleeping toddler.

He kissed your temple lightly before he left. “Be right back, sweetheart. Don’t move. I like seeing you like this.”

⸻

Writers Note: I’m starting to tone it down with Carmen a bit more fluff I have a series of a not so fluff more dramatic I guess of Carmen x reader I’ll think about posting it. im toning it down too 2-3 post a day for Friday-Saturday I know it’s a change from the 4-5 I started with but I have a lot to catch up on and I’m already a 3 weeks ahead so now it’s a matter of fixing a master list and editing. As always like share comment..

Ciao 🫶🏽

[tip-top-cloud-surfer]

The Danger Zone (Part 9) - Hangman

Pairing: Hangman / Fem!Bradshaw!Reader | OC

Word Count: 4.2k

This work, all my works, and my entire blog are 18+ ONLY

Warnings: Unplanned Pregnancy; Background Relationships; Use of "You," No Use of Y/N, No Set Physical Description

Summary: You and Jake tell Phoenix and Coyote about the baby and spend some more time together.

Series Master List

Master List

After telling your brother, Coyote and Phoenix were next on your list. And after they knew, then you could stop hiding it from everyone, so you and Jake were both anxious to finally get to that point. The secrecy was more stressful than anything else, and you were ready to be free of it. 

So, the day after the dinner with your side of the family, you and Jake headed over to Phoenix and Coyote’s house for lunch. 

“You can handle this one,” you told Jake as the two of you got out of Jake’s truck. 

“You sure?”

“Coyote’s your family. And I’ve had enough of telling families this weekend,” you replied softly. 

Jake led the way up to the side door and opened it without even knocking. Holding it open for you, Jake followed you inside. The two of you made your way into the kitchen. 

“You know, where I come from, people knock before entering someone else’s house,” Phoenix commented as she stacked some plates.

“Where’s Javy?” Jake asked in return, causing Phoenix to roll her eyes. 

“He’s outside at the grill.” 

You nudged Jake in the side and gestured at the stuff that Phoenix had clearly stacked up to bring outside for lunch. Jake helped Phoenix carry all of the stuff outside and handed you the roll of napkins before you could reach for anything heavier. Javy stood at the grill and grinned as the three of you stepped outside. 

“I knew I heard your car.”

“And I’m remembering why we didn’t give him a key,” Phoenix stated, setting the plates down. 

The four of you, though it was mostly split between Jake and Coyote and then you and Phoenix, made conversation as Coyote finished up. But when the four of you sat around the table, the topic of conversation shifted. 

“So, you guys are back together then?” Coyote asked, glancing between the two of you. “When did that happen?”

“Not too long after we talked,” Jake replied, taking the lead.

“And did Rooster finally find out about you guys?” Phoenix questioned, causing you to nod. “How’d he react?”

“Like I knew he would,” you stated, leaning back in your seat. “Poorly.” 

“Well, you knew that was coming,” Phoenix pointed out, causing you to shrug your shoulders.  

“Yeah, we did,” you agreed, turning to Jake.

“He wasn’t exactly happy about our relationship. And then he found out that she’s pregnant and he wanted to kill me,” Jake explained, dropping the information bomb on top of Coyote and Phoenix casually. 

“You’re pregnant?” Coyote asked you suddenly, looking shocked at the news. 

“I knew it,” Phoenix stated at the same time.

“How did you know?” you asked confused. 

“I didn’t see you drink during the wedding,” Phoenix started off with. “Then Rooster mentioned that you were throwing up a lot. And then you started wearing a lot of dresses and loose clothes and things with big patterns. You were clearly hiding something.”

“And you didn’t tell me?” Coyote asked, causing Phoenix to turn to her husband. 

“I wasn’t going to say anything until I actually knew that she was pregnant,” Phoenix stated as if it was obvious. Shaking her head at her husband’s playfully offended expression, Phoenix turned back to you. But when the two of you locked eyes again, her expression noticeably softened. “So, how do you feel about it?” 

“I’m doing a lot better,” you replied, nodding along. “It feels nice to finally share it with everyone.”

“How did Mav take the news?”

“Well, Hangman’s still standing, at least,” Coyote joked, causing Jake to scoff. 

“Mav it took pretty well, actually, all things considered,” you explained quietly.

“How far along are you now?” Coyote questioned, turning to you. 

“About fifteen weeks now,” you stated, folding your hands over your abdomen.

“And you and the baby are healthy, right?” Phoenix added, causing you to smile. 

“Yeah, we’re fine.”

“Well, congrats.”

Coyote grabbed three beers and a ginger ale for you so that the four of you could celebrate. You clinked your drinks together and shared smiles as Coyote made a toast. 

“To Baby Ser—Brad—” he cut himself off twice, realizing that he should have asked beforehand.

“Bradshaw-Seresin,” you suggested, sharing a look with Jake, who nodded in return. 

“To Baby Bradshaw-Seresin!” 

The four of you finished up lunch and Javy got up first, dragging Jake with him inside to put away the food. But it was clearly a tactic to split you and Jake up for a moment so that Coyote and Phoenix could actually speak freely to both of you. 

“So, you’re having a baby with Hangman,” Phoenix stated, causing you to nod slowly. “And he looks pretty calm, actually. And happy.”

“Who, Jake?” 

“Yeah. Has he been calm the whole time?” 

“Pretty much,” you replied softly. “Why? Were you expecting him to freak out?”

“I think most guys would freak out in this situation,” Phoenix commented, taking a sip from her beer. “And you guys broke up.” 

“Well, can you break up if you were technically never together?” you asked Phoenix.

“And are you together now?”

“Yes and sort of no.”

“What the hell does that mean? Has he asked you out or not? Have you put a label on it?”

“Co-parents?” you suggested. 

“Alright,” Phoenix sighed, letting the question go. “Well, what couple-y things have you two been doing?”

“We’re thinking about moving in together, to Jake’s apartment, once my lease is up.” 

“That makes sense,” Phoenix agreed. She paused for a moment before asking, “Have the two of you guys . . . you know . . . since you found out about the baby?” 

“Have we what?”

“Fucked,” Phoenix stated bluntly.

“Jesus Christ, Nat!”

“Well?”

“No, we haven’t,” you stated honestly, looking down at your fingers. “We haven’t even kissed.” 

“And?” Phoenix asked, reading your expression.

“And what?”

“Do you want to do that with him?”

“I . . .” You glanced into the house where Jake and Javy were talking before turning back to Phoenix. Biting the inside of your cheek, you lowered your hands to your lap. “Well, you know how pregnancy impacts your hormones?”

“Obviously.”

“And do you ever feel more . . . pent up at certain times of the month?” you asked, your cheeks growing warm. “Well, it’s sort of been like that.” 

“Oh shit,” Phoenix stated, causing you to hold your head in your hands with embarrassment. “How bad?”

“Well, it’s not great,” you huffed, picking your head up. “And I mean, if we’re going to move in with each other, I can’t just be . . . taking care of myself in our bed when he’s right next to me.”

“I might have a solution.”

“What?” you asked, perking up. 

“Ask him to help out,” Phoenix stated, making an obscene gesture with her hands. 

“Nat!”

You grabbed her hands from across the table, causing her to scoff at you. Lowering her hands, Phoenix shot you a look. 

“Just talk to him, for fucks sake. He doesn’t seem like the type to say ‘no’ to that.”

“What if it complicates things?”

“You’re already pregnant with his baby. How much more complicated than that can it get?”

“I don’t know,” you sighed, holding a hand to your head. “It's just starting to run smoother. I don’t want to ruin that.”

“You know that if you or Hangman need anything, we’re here for you guys, right?”

“We know,” you assured her, shooting her a small smile. “Thanks.”

“And I can try to talk to Rooster if you want.”

“I think Emma’s got it handled,” you stated, causing Phoenix to nod with a proud smirk. 

“I’ll leave it to her to have that conversation with him.” Phoenix took another sip from her beer as her smirk dropped. “But, word of advice? Have more serious conversations with Hangman sooner rather than later.”

“Why?” you asked, confused. 

“There’s talk of some of us being deployed soon.” 

“Oh,” you replied softly, rubbing your small bump to soothe yourself. “I guess you guys are sort of overdue, now that I think about it.” 

“I didn’t mean to freak you out or anything.”

“No, I know,” you assured her, forcing a smile. “Just more . . . complications.”

Meanwhile, inside the house, Jake and Coyote were across from each other at the kitchen island. Coyote stood tall, resting his hands on the counter top in a way that showed that he was steady and strong. But Jake, on the other hand, was sinking a bit further into his seat the longer that he sat there.  

“Are you okay?” Coyote asked quietly. “Really, are you okay with all of this, Jake?”

“I’m fucking terrified,” Jake replied, picking his head up slowly.

“It’s a big step.” Coyote glanced towards where you and Phoenix were sitting. “What happened after we talked?”

“I went over to her apartment to talk. Rooster and Maverick were there and I had to sit through the most awkward dinner of my life. And then when I went to the bathroom to try and calm down, I found a wrapper for prenatal vitamins.” 

“That’s how you found out that she was pregnant?”

“Yeah. Really shitty isn’t it?” Jake replied dryly. “And then I freaked out and left and she came over to my apartment the next day. We talked, she invited me to her appointment, and we’ve been focusing on telling her family and trying to get to know each other better.” 

“And how’s that been going?”

“Sometimes it feels natural, sometimes it doesn’t.” 

“Are you guys getting married? Moving in together? Actually getting together?” 

“We’re not getting married.” When Coyote looked at him with a knowing expression, Jake continued, “We’re going to move into my apartment together once her lease is up. And we are together. Just not like a lot of people are.” 

“So, you guys haven’t done any . . .” Javy trailed off, earning a look from Jake. “It’s a relevant question! You had to do it to get her pregnant in the first place.” Javy reached over to grab his phone. “Which reminds me, I need to pick up more condoms.”

“No, we haven’t,” Jake stated, ignoring Javy’s gaze.

“And do you want to?” Jake shot Coyote a look, causing him to raise a hand. “I know, I know, stupid question.” Coyote straightened up some more and asked, “So how did the dinner go with her family?”

“Rooster was ready to knock my teeth out.”

“Not shocking.”

“No, but he was acting like a little bitch. At least the secrecy is over, but I have a feeling that he’s going to be a little bitch for the rest of his life.”

Jake tapped his finger on the countertop, his mind wandering to something that Rooster said yesterday. Jake turned back to Coyote with a more withdrawn expression.

“What do you know about Connor?”

“Connor who?”

“Her ex.”

“Oh, the fiancé,” Coyote drawled with a bit of sass. “Why the hell do you care?”

“Rooster mentioned that they were together for five years.”

“And?”

“That’s a long time.”

“So? He’s not here. And she broke up with him. And I doubt that she’s even reached out to him since.”

“Why?”

“Because she’s been running around with you.” Coyote reached for his beer, “And from the little comments that Nat told me about him, he’s not someone that you should be stressing about.”

“Because?”

“He was a boring prick who tried to tell her what she wanted—Nat’s words, not mine—which is why she broke up with him.”

“Alright, alright, I get it,” Jake sighed, reaching for his own beer. 

“And have you told her about them?” Coyote asked after a moment.

“What do you think?” 

“Jake,” Coyote sighed, causing Jake to look away from him, “you have to tell her some of it.” 

“Why?” 

“Because you’re having a baby together,” Coyote stressed. “That’s a huge commitment. Literally, the biggest commitment that two people could make. You’re tied to each other for the rest of your lives.” 

“I know that, Javy,” Jake replied back forcefully.

Coyote picked his head up and moved to speak when the door opened and you and Phoenix headed inside. And the conversation ended right then and there when you and Phoenix walked over. 

~~~~~

Once Phoenix and Coyote were aware of your pregnancy, you and Jake stopped hiding it. You wore clothes that accentuated rather than hid your bump. You got a lot of unsolicited advice, as did Jake, but you were quick to accept Sarah Kazansky’s advice when she offered it. And you and Jake started the process of moving in together. 

“I guess that I can get rid of a lot of this crap,” you commented, digging through your apartment. “I won’t be needing them.” 

“You don’t want to put them in the storage unit?” 

“No, I think that between Mav’s little house and Bradley’s house, we won’t need it anymore. And besides, half of this crap is stuff that I just bought on a whim,” you replied, tossing some more things into cardboard boxes. “And you already have your own sets of stuff and if we move into a house together, we could just buy new ones together if we really wanted.” 

Tossing some old decorations that you didn’t even remember having, you looked up to see Jake wrapping up your framed photos.

“How was work today?” you asked conversationally.

“The usual. Your brother’s still avoiding me.” 

“I guess that’s better than the two of you fighting,” you sighed, turning back to the closet. Pulling out some more crap, you stared down at your hands. “Any talk of deployments or anything like that?” 

“Not today, no,” Jake answered honestly. “But Cyclone seems to be in the middle of planning something.” 

“Do you think you’ll get called up?” you asked, turning around to face him. 

Jake looked up from the photo that he was wrapping, which just so happened to be one of only three photos in existence of the full Bradshaw family before Goose died. Seeing the nerves under the mask that you were forcing yourself to wear, he gently placed the photo down on the table and turned to face you. 

“I don’t know,” he answered honestly. “I mean, I’ll try to avoid it, but . . .” 

“I understand,” you assured him quietly. “I grew up around the Navy. I get it.” 

Jake nodded slowly, wincing at the defeated tone in your voice, before glancing down at the photo that he was wrapping. He had never really seen a photo of Goose before, minus a small one in his file, but Jake felt like the man was staring him down through the glass. Turning back to you, Jake finished wrapping up the photo. 

“Was your dad deployed a lot?” 

“Yeah, of course,” you replied, sorting through some smaller boxes. “He was deployed when I was born, actually.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, my mom ended up giving birth alone,” you commented, reaching up to grab more stuff down from the shelves. “My grandma had to watch Bradley and my dad was gone.” Keeping your gaze focused on your task, you missed Jake’s expression change. “The first time he met me was when we came out to visit him at Top Gun.”

Oh, Jake could really feel Goose’s gaze burning into him through the glass and from beyond the grave. 

“So . . .”

“Yeah,” you replied simply, glancing up at Jake for a moment. “I mean at least I have a photo with him. That’s what I always said whenever people tried to convey their condolences when I was a kid.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It happened a long time ago,” you stated, turning back to your sorting. 

“No, not . . . I mean . . .” You looked up as Jake trailed off, working on his words. “When we were training for the mission, your brother and I had an argument and I brought up your dad. And I’m sorry about that. And of course the whole other—”

“—Jake,” you told him, saving him some rambling. “I know about the whole fight.”

“You do?” he asked, confused. 

“Mav told me. I asked him about why Bradley would have asked me to stay away from you before the wedding and he mentioned it.” You wore a calm expression as you added, “I didn’t love that, obviously, but you saved Bradley and Maverick a few days later and so I thought it canceled out.”

Jake nodded slowly, watching as you turned back to the closet. And when he saw the shelf that you were trying to clear, he quickly walked over. Grabbing the box for you, despite your huff at the action, Jake put it down on the table for you to look through. 

“I’m not crippled, you know,” you stated, walking over to the table. 

“Still, I’m here to help you,” Jake responded, pulling down some more stuff from the higher shelves. “So, what are you doing with the stuff that you want to keep for now?”

“Putting them in the corner, I guess. What else would I do with them?”

“I mean, we could bring them over to my place.”

“You sure?” you asked, looking up at him. “Do you have space for them?”

“I’m not a hoarder. And I’m used to living bare bones so that I can pack up and move quickly,” Jake stated, causing you to nod. 

“Okay. Then I guess we can bring them over.” A moment of silence passed before you turned back to him. “Actually, that reminds me. I was wondering if I could sleep over at some point before I officially move in. You know, to see how it feels and everything.”

“Do you want to stay over tonight?” Jake offered immediately.

“You don’t mind?”

“I wouldn’t have offered it if I did.”

“Okay,” you agreed softly. 

You and Jake sorted through some more stuff before loading the boxes of your keepsakes into his truck. You took two cars since you would have to go to work from Jake’s apartment, but you picked up food along your way as a thank you. The two of you put the boxes into Jake’s closet, which was completely empty minus the vacuum and a box of trash bags, before sitting down to eat dinner together.

You and Jake finished up dinner and spent the rest of the evening walking around his apartment, taking stock of things that you needed to bring and buy, and where you would put everything. Especially with all of the baby stuff that was going to come at some point. Making a list on your phone of all the measurements and things to get, you and Jake decided to call it an early night. 

You changed in the bathroom, not wanting to make him uncomfortable. Pulling on your usual sleep shirt and shorts, you brushed your hair and your teeth before walking into Jake’s bedroom. Jake was sitting up in bed, scrolling on his phone when you stepped out of the bathroom. 

You were wearing a large worn gray tee shirt that had ‘NAVY’ stamped across the front of it and a pair of silky sleep shorts. And Jake was trying to figure out if you knew that the shirt that you were wearing belonged to him, as noted by the oil stain on the left breast of the shirt, or not. And even though it was loose on you, he could still see your bump under there as you moved around. And then his thoughts started to wander. 

Shifting awkwardly on the bed, Jake turned to you. 

“Did you find everything fine?”

“I have been here before,” you reminded him, setting your phone down on the nightstand. You turned to shut the light off before climbing into bed. You laid down and moved to get comfortable, locking eyes with Jake. “Let me know if I’m taking up too much space.”

“You’re fine,” Jake assured you. “Take whatever you need.” Shifting to lay down as well, Jake rolled on his side so that the two of you were staring at each other, your faces illuminated by the moon. “I’ll probably be gone before you wake up. I’ll try to be as quiet as possible.”

“I’m a heavy sleeper, so don’t feel stressed about it.” Nuzzling your head into the pillow, you closed your eyes. “Night, Jake.”

“Night,” he returned softly. 

Jake moved to go to sleep himself, but when he heard your breathing even out and slow, he opened his eyes. You had fallen asleep quickly, the tension gone from your body, and your lips slightly parted. Jake’s eyes trailed over your face and down to the blanket that seemed to naturally curl around your bump. He reached out and gently caressed the curve before going to bed himself. 

~~~~~

Jake woke up before his alarm, like he always did. But this time, he didn’t wake up alone. 

You were curled into his side and he seemed to have shifted naturally to accommodate you. His right arm was lazily wrapped around your waist with his fingers brushing against your bump. His arm was a little numb from the position but he couldn’t have cared less. Your legs were slightly tangled with his own and your head rested against his shoulder as you continued to peacefully sleep. 

Instead of getting up early, Jake laid there and took in the moment and the feel of you against him, brushing his fingers along the curve of your abdomen.

He would have laid there all day but he still had to go to work. Slowly untangling himself from you, he slipped out of bed and headed into the bathroom to get ready. 

You woke up to the sound of the shower running. Blinking, you rolled over to see the bathroom door closed. The bed beside you was still warm and he had tucked the blankets back down to keep you insulated. You shifted around, trying to get comfortable again. Closing your eyes and trying to go back to sleep, you paused when you heard the shower shut off. 

Opening your eyes slowly, you sucked in a breath when Jake opened the door in nothing but a towel wrapped low on his waist. 

You’d seen Jake in less than a towel. More than a few times. But there was just something about how he stood there that felt all kinds of new. All kinds of ways that made you want to get up and drag him down into bed with you. 

The steam in the bathroom behind him added a glow to his tan skin. The water droplets marked trails down his chest and abdomen down to his towel that you wanted to chase with your tongue. He told you that he sometimes shaved his chest but you preferred the layer. It made him look more . . . rugged. Biteable. Something that you wanted to get your mouth on. And, of course, the man had such strong V lines that you could map them out perfectly in the dark without fail. And you had. 

“Sorry,” he called, pulling you out of your thoughts. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“You didn’t wake me,” you replied, sitting up more. 

“Did you want breakfast?” Jake asked, walking over to his closet. He grabbed his uniform from the door and walked back into the bathroom. 

“I’ll be fine. I can grab something on the way.”

“You sure? I’m already making eggs and toast,” Jake offered, stepping back into the bathroom. He shut the door enough to give him privacy but still allowed you to talk to him. 

“Um,” you stammered, wincing when you heard the towel drop to the floor, “sure.” Getting up from bed, you walked out of the room. “I’ll get it started.”

Jake went to work earlier than you, so you were in no rush to get ready. Pulling out his toaster and setting it up, you glanced up as Jake walked into the kitchen with his perfectly pressed uniform and wet hair slicked back. You kept your gaze down, hoping that Jake didn’t notice the color in your cheeks. 

You ate your toast and excused yourself to change your clothes. Walking out to wish Jake well with his day, you offered him a small smile. 

“Thanks for letting me stay over.”

“This’ll be your place too soon,” Jake replied, pulling the strap of his bag over his shoulder. 

“Right.” 

“I gave you a key, so you shouldn’t have any problems locking up.”

“Yeah, I should be fine.” Shifting your weight around, you turned back to Jake. “When will I see you next?”

“Whenever you want. I have to go help Javy with something at the house eventually, but I can do that whenever.”

“Tomorrow?” you suggested softly. 

“Tomorrow,” Jake agreed with a nod. 

Jake turned to leave but instead of walking to the door, he walked around to where you were standing. You looked up at Jake with wider eyes as he leaned in closer. He pressed a soft kiss to your cheek before pulling away. 

“Text me if you need me.”

You could only nod as he walked around you and headed out the door. Standing there for a moment, you let out a long sigh.

“Fuck,” you breathed out, holding a hand to your head. 

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[misspelledwordswizard]

I would love to see the chain react to reader from the atla universe or just one that uses bending in the same way? Just using bending unconsciously and freaking them all out because of it.

I love Atla, I loved writing this! I didn't know what kind of bending you were expecting, so I did waterbending, I hope you like it.

A notice about orders; I'm doing them in order, so if yours takes a little longer, it's probably because I'm working on others, but they'll all be done! And I'm very happy with them too, don't worry about it, you can send them, I'm loving your ideas.

It was a hot sunny day, so much so that Chain mutually agreed to take a break to go into the nearby river. It was a calm river with a small waterfall that made a pleasant noise in the environment. Wild and Wind were the first to jump in, excited as children, well, at least one of them was one. I couldn’t have been happier. You could say that the water is my territory, so on a day like this, being in cold water was paradise for me. 

Little by little, the others started to enter the river too. It was easy for them, they could just take off their tunics and equipment and get in, while I had to temporarily separate from the group to change and put on a bathing suit, but that was okay, it didn’t take long. Soon I was also entering the river to enjoy the sunny day. 

The cold water touched my body bringing a welcome feeling of relief, cooling my hot and sweaty skin, but this moment of peace was short-lived after I felt a wave of water hit me directly in the face, followed by the sound of childish laughter. That brat.  I imitated his attitude, pushing water with my hands towards him, hitting him with everything and stopping his laughter. The sailor still had the audacity to better himself with indignation, as if he hadn’t been the first to start. I could hear the others laughing in the background too, but they didn’t have the courage to get involved in this. Now it was war. 

Soon the area of the river where we were became a mess of water being splashed in all directions incessantly. Until I could feel a particularly strong attack coming from Wind, and instinctively wanted to retaliate even more. The movements so natural to me happened without me even being able to think about it, soon a small wave, but bigger than any I could generate with my bare hands, appeared next to me and went towards the Sailor, strong enough to make him stay underwater for a few seconds, raising his head in surprise and confusion right after. 

— Aha, I won! – I exclaimed excitedly, but my excitement died when I saw the lack of reaction not only from the sailor, but from all the boys. – What happened? Was I too harsh? 

— How did you do that?! – Wind was the first to speak, coming towards me excitedly. Only then did I understand my mistake. 

— Yeah, was that some kind of magic? – Wars asked, intrigued. 

— I’ve never heard of magic like that. – Hyrule replied, looking curious and suspicious at the same time. 

— Well, that’s because it’s not magic. – I replied, creating even more doubts in everyone, who remained silent waiting for me to continue. – You know, you may not know much about the place I come from, but there’s no magic there. On the other hand, there are people there who can have some control over one of the elements of nature, using specific movements. We’re called benders. 

Even when I tried to explain, they seemed terribly confused and incredulous.  Of course, they already knew I came from a different kind of world, and had somehow ended up here through a strange portal, but I’ve avoided talking about my home to them, precisely because I thought it might be too much for them to take in. Just as it has been for me. 

— So, you can simply control the elements of nature? – The Champion questioned, not very confident about it. 

— Not all of them, and we call it bending. There are four main types of bending, water, fire, earth and air. People who have this ability can only bend one of the four, with the exception of the Avatar. – I can’t tell if throwing all this information out was useful or just made the situation worse. 

— That’s cool! – Wind exclaimed. – Show me more, that’s really cool! 

— Well, that’s definitely interesting, could you demonstrate more of that? – Time asked, and I could tell he wanted to analyze it better. 

— Yeah, what do you normally use it for? – Twilight was the next to ask. 

— Well, waterbending can be used as a medicinal method, and each bending can be used for various everyday things, and for fighting. 

— You mean you could have used it to fight this whole time and you just chose not to?! – Legend seemed indignant at that. 

— Well... I already imagined it would be difficult to explain about this.  – I replied, while using my bending again as they had asked me to, making a large ball of water float over the river. 

— Cool. – Wild said. – Now that we know and you can use it, I’m sure it can be very useful. 

— Yeah, you said it has medicinal properties? That would be really good. – The Traveler questioned, receiving a positive answer from me. 

— Guys, you’re forgetting the main thing! – Wind said, getting everyone’s attention. – Have you thought about the games we can play with this? 

Everyone snorted at the boy’s childish answer, when we expected something a little more important than that. I was afraid to talk about it with them, but they ended up being much more understanding than I imagined. That’s good. 

— But I must admit that I’m very curious about this too. Can you show me other things you can do? You said there are four main bends, does that mean there are other smaller bends? – Sky asked excitedly, and everyone seemed as curious as he was about the subject. 

— Hey, this would be really useful for forging swords, can you help me next time I work on the Champion’s sword? – The blacksmith was the next to ask, which created a gap for a flood of different questions. 

— Can you close wounds? 

— What exactly would an “avatar” be? 

— How does earthbending work? 

— Can I be considered an airbender? 

— How do movements influence this? 

Soon, I was surrounded by curious blondes and being drowned in their curious questions. I think we’re going to spend a good amount of time on this subject. 

[themculibrary]

The Avengers & Peter Parker Masterlist 2

part one

A Barton Surprise (ao3) - Delena_Stark pepper/tony, clint/laura N/R, 5k

Summary: Requested by Droth

“Maybe one where Peter is Tony’s 12 year old biological son. Peter has to go with Tony to the Barton farm, and he ends up hanging out with the older Barton kids.”

a little white lie (ao3) - LethalBookshelves G, 2k

Summary: It all started when the Rogues were supposed to move back into the Tower after their pardons. Actually, it started when Peter jokingly called Tony ‘dad’ in front of them. After that, the Rogues assumed that he was Tony’s illegitimate son. Tony—being the devil that he is—decided to go along with it.

Or: Tony and Peter pretend to be father and son for the Rogues because people kept mistaking them for family anyway.

Cyanide? In My Shawarma? (ao3) - losingmymindtonight T, 4k

Summary: Pepper convinces Tony to bring Peter along on his first dinner with the Rogue Avengers since their pardoning.

Poor Tony had thought the whole thing was a recipe for disaster before someone decided to shove some cyanide in his food.

Discoveries and Reveries (ao3) - sprayedwithcrab pepper/tony, background steve/bucky T, 13k

Summary: Peter Parker is Tony Stark’s personal intern. Nothing more, nothing less.

At least, that’s what the two of them are telling everybody.

The Avengers immediately know there’s something more going on. They’re the Avengers for a reason, remember? So they all conclude: Peter isn’t just a personal intern, he is also Tony’s illegitimate son.

Peter is definitely not a fan of this new development.

Hello Midtown High (ao3) - AmyR G, 20k

Summary: This is basically domestic Avengers and Peter Parker, with a slight smattering of the Field Trip trope thrown in. It’s really just domestic Avengers though.

How The Avengers exasperated Peter Parker (ao3) - NinaTaylor mentioned pepper/tony G, 6k

Summary: This is my take on the popular "Peter´s field trip to Stark industries" trope, because in most of those I read the Avengers don´t actually embarrass/ annoy Peter like I imagine. So I wrote one of my own, where The Avengers have much fun with treating Peter like an actual intern.

I Just Thought (ao3) - possiblyobsessed pepper/tony G, 9k

Summary: People are coming forward all the time saying they are/have Tony Stark’s child. Others are sure that he has a child out there. It’s only natural that when he starts hanging out with a child everyone assumes Peter is his. He’s only slightly offended that the people close to him believe it.Or Five times someone thought Peter was Tony’s biological child and the one time someone knew he wasn’t.Includes a little bonus chapter.

My son (ao3) - breakanironheart G, 3k

Summary: Five years after the Avengers met Peter and watched him grow up, a vigilante called ‘Spider-Man’ started going around in New York. They didn’t care about it until a specific fifteen-year-old started acting suspiciously.

Parenting for Superheroes (ao3) - somebocly steve/tony G, 5k

Summary: AKA Peter thought coffee and energy drinks would mix well together while staying at the Avengers Tower.

Peter Parker and Shuri Prank The Avengers Team (ao3) - myheartisburiedinvenice mj/peter, clint/natasha, gamora/peter, steve/bucky T, 37k

Summary: Peter and Shuri are just adorable and like freaking their friends out with pranks.

Peter Parkers Avengers Pyjamas (ao3) - schrijverr G, 1k

Summary: The Rogue Avengers are back at the Tower, Peter runs into them and they question him about Tony.

He isn’t about to let some people talk shit about his dad- uhm, mentor

Peter Parker saves The Avengers (ao3) - PassibleLightning G, 11k

Summary: When the Avengers are attacked and thrown into their own nightmares, the only ones who can save them is Peter Parker and Dr. Strange.

Peter Parker Sets It Straight (and has a run-in with a fire hydrant) (ao3) - bluemoonwisp T, 3k

Summary: Peter Parker has a run-in with a fire hydrant and the Avengers.

Progress Report (ao3) - sameuspegasus N/R, 10k

Summary: Ms. Warren has some questions for Tony Stark regarding the exact nature of Peter’s internship. She gets invited to the lab to see for herself.

The Avengers Meet Peter Parker +1 (ao3) - Lavander_Clearwater pepper/tony, peter/harley T, 4k

Summary: The Avengers finally meet Tony's mysterious intern. Plus a surprise guest.

The Domestic Avengers in: The Babysitting Dilemna (fanfiction.net) - madhatterroxas T, 3k

Summary: In which Steve and Tony ask Loki to babysit Peter, whilst Thor tags along and basically gets in the way. AU, slightly crackish; StevexTony

The Five Times Peter Got Help With Schoolwork and The One Time It Was Done For Him (ao3) - DJ_unicornsrgr8 steve/bucky G, 19k

Summary: Peter needs more sleep. And time. But he definitely doesn’t need help, or at least that’s what he tells himself.

Aka Peter isn’t a good self-advocate.

Aka the title is pretty self-explanatory.

What They See (ao3) - manymessyfandoms T, 2k

Summary: Peter and Tony’s bond from the eyes of the other Avengers.

[wistericaine]

moony's loony tunes #1 | the marauders

the marauders | crack and fluff | wc: 469

summary: remus explains why we should blow up the moon

“This is a video essay on why I think we should blow up the moon.” Remus stated flatly.

Remus was a mixed-media kind of vlogger. He didn’t quite have the energy for streaming like his friends did, so he only streamed once every month for their charity game nights. But he did quite like creating videos—ones he could film and edit as he pleased.

Sometimes they would be serious—video essays on topics like the history of plagues or disability representation in the media. Other times, like this time, it would be absolutely ridiculous.

“What?” Sirius asked, though it was more of a statement than a question.

Remus had taken his camera to the living room where Sirius and James were hanging out, sitting it down on the table while he began his newest series. Sirius and James had dubbed it Moony’s Loony Tunes—but he just liked to call it proof that conspiracy theories are easy to make.

“Number one. The full moon gets rid of some of the stars in the sky.” Remus started, holding up a printed picture of the full moon with question marks around it. “This proves the moon isn’t very nice.”

He could hear James and Sirius laughing in the background. 

“Number two. The moon is just pure proof of consumerism at this point.” Remus stated.

“What on Earth are you talking about?” Sirius asked. “It’s a rock.”

Remus rolled his eyes. “A rock that two of the biggest governments fought to claim? I don’t think so.”

“Hold on, hold on—“ James laughed. “You think that there’s something wrong with the moon because two governments decided that they wanted to land on it?”

“Everyone knows that the government knows the things we don’t.” Remus said sternly. “Chances are that there’s probably some alcoholic moon cheese on there, which brings me to my next point—“

“Seriously?” Sirius laughed.

“Number three, I want the alcoholic moon cheese.” Remus then switched photos, showing the camera a horribly drawn cup with a light yellow liquid inside. Said liquid was marked to the brim with red marker—question marks and arrows alike. 

“All hail the alcoholic moon cheese?” James said.

“Oh, and number four.” Remus said, putting the paper down. “It watches me at night. It knows all of my secrets.”

“What secrets?” James asked Remus.

“The bodies.” Remus said. “Plus, I hate it when people percieve me.”

There was a brief pause before Sirius and James both burst out into laughter. A hard kind of laughter, one that came from your stomach and refused to leave for minutes. 

“Don’t you literally post weekly videos?” Sirius laughed.

“Can’t you literally shut your mouth?” Remus retorted.

The three of them broke out into full laughter then, wheezes and snorts filling the audio for two more minutes before Remus shut his camera off.

hello everyone, i hope you guys enjoyed! remus would 100% do this and you cant tell me otherwise. that is all. thanks so much for reading!

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