#fandom problem 5407

[damnfandomproblems]

Fandom Problem #5407:

Fictives: We are not our source.

Also Fictives: I will walk into a space specifically designed for talking about my source, then act very entitled to how fans talk about it. It's never on me to set my own boundaries with fandom like everybody else, y'all must accommodate what happened to me specifically even if it isn't canon or headcanon compliant.

...so which fucking is it?

[ao3feed-wincest-archive]

Equilibrium

read it on the AO3 at http://bit.ly/2WqxEQP

by storyspinner70

The Archangel Michael finally had Dean as his vessel and he wasn't about to let him go. That was fine though because Sam and Rowena had an almost foolproof plan. Until it wasn't. They started their spell with one Dean trapped in his own mind by Michael and ended it with five – one of which still housed Michael and disappeared the second he could. While Rowena and crew were out looking for Michael, it was up to Sam to stay with the other four Deans and keep everyone in balance. No problem at all. Right?

Words: 5407, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Supernatural

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester

Relationships: Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester

Additional Tags: Multiple Selves, Spells & Enchantments, Threesome - M/M/M, Top Dean Winchester, Bottom Sam, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Humor, Wincest Reverse Bang 2019

read it on the AO3 at http://bit.ly/2WqxEQP

[damnfandomproblems]

https://www.tumblr.com/damnfandomproblems/757799195812020224/5407-different-anon-here-being-annoyed-at?source=share

You can't honestly say this when

The 'DID' community has an almost-total overlap with the 'made up disorder' (MUD) flag collecting community

Practically everyone you see in DID groups are 15-20, yet they say all of their favorite characters are ones who also happen to be alters...and the characters are all from a show that came out a couple years ago. That's not how psychological development works, you don't 'split alters' in your teens many times just because you saw TMNT and liked it. Comfort characters are different than something you saw as a really young kid and your brain latched onto as a dissociative mechanism

Most of the people who actually thought they had DID and came forward about it said they ended up having BPD and or an anxiety disorder due to bad experiences growing up.

You need bad trauma to have DID. Bad. A parent threatening to hit you or grabbing you a few times or living in an environment that is super tense is not going to give you DID. The abuse needs to be prolonged in very early childhood and unspeakable and you're not gonna be able to function. If you're 14 on tumblr talking happily about all your 'alters'...they're not alters

A lot of these people have recorded themselves in psych offices and asked if they had DID, met none of the criteria (even obvious during the interviews), and when the psychologist said they believe it could be BPD or something else, they actually got mad. Not distressed, or frustrated, but mad. That's how strong their assumption about it is

On that note, a lot of the tumblr DID community is anti-psych

The 'who's fronting' games people play with their honest to heck family members like it's a quirky thing

The obvious overlap of people who like to cosplay and play pretend, and people who claim to have DID

The super super distinct 'alter' personalities, when it's a covert disease where switches are usually more like moods, and people always need professional help to even find out the personalities.

Dueling banjo-type conversations with alters, at least one video (the person with the voice training) was debunked. This isn't how it works. Again this. isn't. how. it. works.

People are literally roleplaying back and forth with themselves, using messages from their different 'alters', on discord. Seconds apart from each other. Going back to the dueling banjos thing...

Etc I'm not writing a sermon here

Posting as a response to a previous ask.

[damnfandomproblems]

Problem 5407: To the other Anons who say DID is just BPD and anxiety are wrong. BPD, anxiety, and schizophrenia are usually what patients with DID are diagnosed with first. Psychologists say that it's way more common than people think. It's also from any kind of trauma usually childhood since everyone experiences trauma differently. Like all mental health issues it's a spectrum. Self diagnosing is the first step to getting help but please see an actual professional to get diagnosed especially if you are having memory loss outside of normal everyday memory loss and think you have more than at least 2 personalities.

Please see a medical professional to get help for any form of mental health as I am no medical professional

- anon who hyperfixated on DID for a month to do a school psychology project

Posting as a response to a previous problem.

[damnfandomproblems]

757745994814373888

Um. We've hit peak unintentional satire, if the "ableism" this person is referring to is really about problem 5407.

A few people already touched on it a bit, but I'll add my voice too: please leave the spaces you frequent, if you think it's ableist for people to be frustrated with, annoyed by, and concerned for, people who deluded themselves into thinking they're characters going off and ranting about canon, forcing their way into safe spaces, and making everyone afraid to share things, because they say that people sharing fanon, or even just meta about canon, is triggering to them as a ~fictive~. There are thousands of these people doing this now. Mostly kids. It is very, incessantly annoying. And from the outside looking in, it is very obviously bad on a number of levels. If you have never been on the receiving end of this, if you're someone with good intentions who is trying to be inclusive but has been taken for a ride, or (god forbid) you are one of them, which I do hope you're not, it's hard to understand just how unfunctional this kind of policing and gatekeeping is. Again on a number of levels. Not just for the person perpetuating it, but the people it happens to.

If its about a different problem, ignore me.

Posting as a response to a previous ask.

[damnfandomproblems]

5407. different anon here. being annoyed at fictives dictating other people how to do fandom — valid, block them and avoid them. honestly blocking anyone for any reason at all is always valid. saying people “deluded themselves” or “pluralphobia was invented on a carrd” is ableist. maybe pluralphobia as a word is new, but it is a fact that people with DID exist, their experiences vary, and many people around them don’t believe they have alters even if those alters are non-fictives and entirely based on their lives. also chances are that anyone who experiences DID is already getting medical help and doesn’t need your condescending recommendations. mic drop.

Posting as a response to a previous problem.

[damnfandomproblems]

757745439332237312

I'm going to hell for laughing at this lol but that's actually what it's like, and it makes me SO uncomfortable! I can't enable that, like wtf I'm not going to be responsible for someone's unresolved problems. I'm already spending my time on here to forget about my OWN problems for a while! That's bad enough, the fact these communities stick -phobe on all their outlandish labels is just the cherry on top of the gross, offensive cake. Transphobia is a real thing. Pluralphobia is something a person with way too much time on their hands made up on a carrd one day because they wanted to do some worldbuilding for their constructed explanation of their mental health problems. Leave that out of fandom spaces, I fucking BEG. Especially with how many kids are rolling around on tumblr and soaking all this up, it's fucking them up so bad.

Posting as a response to a previous ask.

[damnfandomproblems]

in regards to: 5704, but specifically about anon going on what seems to be a crusade against plurality/DID/Systems/Otherkin:

Just because you were easily convinced and easily willed to use kinning and the like to your advantage to stir up drama and make fandom spaces uncomfortable for others does not in turn mean that every single person who also kins a fictive is gonna repeat the same line of thinking and line of manipulation.

Because here's the thing!!! If it wasn't THAT you could've just as easily done it by just playing the minor card. Plenty of teens do that nowadays too to dodge accountability too. Are we now gonna go and say "Being a teenager online is a problem so stop being young and chronically online" ? No.

No and that's even with having to experience exactly the example I just put in my inbox before. Is it a problem that could be addressed? (The problem being: People finding comfort and solace and power trips in using mental health and other fan goer's want and need to be 'good' to funnel and fuel their egos) Certainly! But we can do so without being dicks too. Because for every quote ''kid'' you see doing that and being a problem, there's tons of adults who also kin and have alters and AREN'T being a problem.

Otherkin and systems (both from trauma or simply manifested in other ways (endo) ) do not need to be thrown under the bus to achieve that. That's all I'm saying here. It's great that you finally figured out your power trips aren't without their price for you, sincerely, but I feel your annoyance to the matter is misplaced at best and vindictive at worst.

Plus, with how behind the wider world and beyond is in terms of mental health? We have no idea how 'rare' DID could be. It's possible that maybe it isn't nearly so 'rare' at all. But last I knew, I'm not a doctor, and neither are you.

Anyway, to the admins, you all are still awesome and sheesh....never a dull moment here I've noticed lol

And to readers of this blog who may in fact be Otherkin or Systems: You're cool and I hope you find ways to curate fandom to your comfort, as I would hope for ALL fandom goers regardless 😎 Fandom at the end of the day is just a hobby, let's not turn it into a battle arena!

Posting as a response to a previous problem.

(Mod note: corrected mis-tagged label from problem 5704 to 5407)

[damnfandomproblems]

I feel like maybe you should shutdown the discourse chain on DID or whatevers going on there. As much as I love watching people argue this blog is supposed to be a fandom discourse space and I feel like this is devolving more into medical discourse... Obviously there's going to be a overlap on these kind of things sometimes but I do think its time to shut this particular thread down.

That particular ask was sent in a few days ago when the topic was more fresh and I only just realized I'd missed it. Currently we don't have any more responses to this topic. Personally I don't like to give conversation topics an expiration date, sometimes I receive asks or responses to older problems. I may tend to be a bit permissive with conversation topics, I don't generally like to shut them down until it becomes necessary.

[damnfandomproblems]

Reply to 757943043960832000

Problem 5407: To the other Anons who say DID is just BPD and anxiety are wrong. BPD, anxiety, and schizophrenia are usually what patients with DID are diagnosed with first.

No. I didn't say that. This is what I said:

"Most of the people who actually thought they had DID and came forward about it said they ended up having BPD and or an anxiety disorder due to bad experiences growing up."

People with BPD characteristically have patterns of unstable self image, moods, relationships, and fear of abandonment. This causes them to seek out sources of attention and relationships where they feel like they won't be abandoned and will be more secure and loved. They either find the faking community and start malingering, or they slowly convince themselves they have real DID and go into the "real DID" communities, and it's self medicating for them. This is why so many people end up going to the psychologist for DID and get diagnosed with BPD. It's not because it's a precursor to DID like you claim. It's because they literally sought out a DID diagnosis because of what their BPD was making them do: search for validation and community, which they can strengthen with a DID diagnosis. And the psychologist immediately spotted the difference. If you're familiar enough with this stuff you'd know a lot of these people are going to actual DID specialists, not uninformed doctors, and still getting shut down, and it's for good reason

Let's looks at the claim that some people who have DID are in fact diagnosed with BPD first. Maybe because of their change in moods, or retrograde amnesia. But: retrograde amnesia isn't always a thing for someone with BPD, unlike with DID where it's one of the defining syndromes and has different patterns than with BPD. Also, BPD's defining traits are emotional instability and relationship issues. DID's defining trait is dissociative symptoms. It's literally in the name of the two disorders

And anxiety is something that a lot of disorders are comorbid with, even autoimmune disorders, so that doesn't mean anything. Anxiety because something is wrong, anxiety because one's health is bad and they don't have answers. You can have anxiety with BPD too, in fact it's common (separation anxiety, GAD). I didn't mention schizophrenia at all so I'm not going to go there

But I know I'm talking to a brick wall, so I'm gonna give the mods a break and not send anything else. And sorry for sending this too. I had to point it out because like someone else said there's a lot of twisting going on and I wanted to nip this one in the bud

Posting as a response to a previous ask.

[damnfandomproblems]

757839158593077248

Anon I don't see misinformation. I'm familiar with these spaces on discord and on tumblr (I was in some of them sadly for a few years, with all the introject fictive hyperfixation alters you could think of, ama) and the other comments are accurate. I was on one server about a tv show, and a lot of people including me said they had alters of the different characters. I thought any time I visualised a character talking in my head it was an alter, because I didn't realise imagination could be that vivid. I sound so stupid even saying that lol. I tried to make people stop talking about certain ships, because I thought I had fictives of a certain character, and I thought people talking about that ship traumatized my alter of that character. I was just grossed out by the ship though, it wasn't traumatising. I milked the reactions I got because it was nice that other people had to accommodate me, I was more important than a lot of other people. A lot of different food words started to get banned because me and other people thought we were triggered by those too, they were foods that were common in other character names and things, so nobody knew what to talk about, and people either started censoring words or just not talking. After a while, I left because it got boring. Leaving was the only reason I realised what I did, and that I was partly responsible. After that I deleted my profile and made a new one with a new name because I was ashamed. I don't join servers that use certain bots and things now, because I don't want to slip back into that. I found some other discord and social media people to follow, and it's nice to talk about shows normally.

Posting as a response to a previous ask.

Also including an additional anon response:

Anon:

If we can whether the braids topic we can whether a topic about cosplaying kids. Let the opinions fly, it's a fandom problems blog and they're both fandom problems!

[damnfandomproblems]

5407.

Response to "mic drop"

"saying people “deluded themselves” or “pluralphobia was invented on a carrd” is ableist. maybe pluralphobia as a word is new, but it is a fact that people with DID exist, their experiences vary, and many people around them don’t believe they have alters even if those alters are non-fictives and entirely based on their lives. also chances are that anyone who experiences DID is already getting medical help and doesn’t need your condescending recommendations. mic drop."

Yeah no. No one that actually has DID is online yammering about their other personalities. The people that are are self diagnosed people doing so for attention. They're malingerers, a known phenomenon of people following the well known symptoms and utilizing stereotypes of a disease that is vastly overdiagnosed to begin with because it is easy for the easily impressionable to imitate.

Pluralphobia is a nonsense term. Telling people that state they have a mental illness that they are, in fact, acting like they have a mental illness (whether they actually have it or not) is not a phobia. It's a reality check. Being told "you need to stop, because this is clearly harmful to your mental health and the community in general" is not a phobia. No one is out committing hate crimes against people that say they have DID. They're telling random people on the internet to stop acting like complete unhinged fools and harrassing people over different interpretations of fiction. If the person cannot handle that, they need to step away from the computer, not report ablesism, because that isn't what it is.

People with DID know that they have a mental disorder and aren't trying to police other people's online experience because they think that the All Might in their brain would be offended by someone else's head canon. They're seeking treatment or know they need to so they can function in society like the rest of us.

Posting as a response to a previous problem.

[damnfandomproblems]

Problem number 5407 is giving bar joke.

A person walks into a bar. The bartender says, why the long face? The person says, that's not funny, I'm a demon fictive with curly horns and I have face dysphoria, how dare you treat me differently than my source!

I block all of those people. I don't even join servers that humor their bullshit, they totally destroy spaces. They need mental health support and enabling it just makes the problem worse and bothers other people.

Posting as a response to a previous problem.

[damnfandomproblems]

757932087047225344

I don't know which anon this person is referring to, but man, it's really not okay to claim they're "power tripping" or "stirring up drama".

People pointing out things that rub you the wrong way is not doing either of those things. People on anon do not get recognition for their asks, so it does beg the question how is that power tripping?

What I'm trying to say here is, there's this bizarre, cross-fandom phenomenon where people will accuse others of having certain motivations for talking about a certain subject, be it trends, uncomfortable situations, and so on, when it's obvious their motivation is just either frustration, confusion, or annoyance. Nobody here is trying to "stir up drama". From what I've read, no one is even going into places where "people with DID" are to antagonize them. There's clearly a lot of people between commenters and anons who have noticed this particular trend everyone is talking about right now, so I also don't understand why the ask I'm replying to seems to word it like it's one person doing all of this! The comments alone should be a pretty good indicator that's not the case.

I don't know, I just hate how there are a strangely high number of people, compared to other touchy subjects, trying to misrepresent what's going on here, and act like they're on a high horse because of that misrepresentation they're doing. It makes it really hard to talk about anything if people can't just be direct and not keep twisting things. Not just here but in fandom in general and it's bad faith.

(Oh, forgot to mention with that last ask: I don't know where "otherkin" came from because that isn't a medical/DID thing at all and I don't think anyone even mentioned that? So again with the whole "trying to twist the discussion" thing I was talking about). Someone claiming to have DID is sooo different than someone who says they have a spiritual connection to a character. The latter's a lot easier to turn a cheek to.

Posting as a response to a previous ask.

[damnfandomproblems]

5407: We know the answer. They're just people who are passionately into fandoms and are either dealing with undiagnosed mental health issues, or are desperate for attention because they are lonely, bullied offline, etc, they convince themselves they have 10 characters from their favorite show in their head and that they're an authority on them. It gives them answers for their mental health, attention and doting from other people *because* mental health, and an excuse to act knowledgeable, etc.

Posting as a response to a previous problem.

[damnfandomproblems]

not a problem but uhh

i think https://www.tumblr.com/damnfandomproblems/757922283551637504/757839158593077248-anon-i-dont-see may be mistagged

Hi mods! I think the last few asks about problem 5407 were mislabeled as 5704. :o

Thank you both for pointing this out, it has now been corrected.