#flibbertiggibit

[neil-neil-orange-peel]

Here's an Alan ask: what do you think those years in the gulag were really like for him? And if you were writing it, how would you have had it affect him? (Since in the show he's not phased at all, lmao)

Oh god, don't tempt me... 👀

I think the years in the gulag have to have been horrible and I don't think even someone like Alan could ignore that indefinitely. He implies at least once he woke up the middle of the cold night to find a rat gnawing at his private parts impressive of the rat to locate something so small. I get completely why Alan had to be unphased by all of this in s4 because his character needs to be confident and have this arrogant belief in his own indestructibility for the plotline and the comedy to work, much in the same way he is unphased in s3 after his hanging. S4E1, where he is hell-bent on revenge and murders Sarah's lover in a very graphic way, is perhaps the only explicit way in which we are shown how he's been affected. However...

Let's look at the facts: it's very fucking bleak for him personally once you remove the comedy. I think leaving him in the gulag was actually an attempt to end the show? Just as his shooting had been? We see that he appears genuinely shocked and - dare I say it? I dare - upset when Sarah rescues Piers instead of him. Like he never predicted this... Which just goes to show how arrogant he truly is. It's maybe one of two moments in the entire show (the other being that breakdown he has the night before his hanging, though granted a lot of that is self pity) where he arguably realises the negative side to being a completely uncaring and actively malicious bastard is that, when the crunch comes, you're alone and no one will help you.

I think he might have been in shock for the rest of the day after Sarah and Piers left, operating on autopilot with a certain vacancy about his expression, and that night something would have cracked. Whether he cracked in a loud way - say, someone just happened to get in his way for a bit too long and he beat the shit out of the them and got in trouble - or in a more quiet way - involving him lying in whatever constituted a bed, people sleeping all around him, while a deranged mixture of tears and a snarling grin spread across his features because he will get his revenge, they'll just see if he doesn't - is debatable. Both would be fun to write, maybe we could be greedy and have both.

In the gulag Alan will have had to work, continuously, with no end in sight, with none of the luxurious he is used to from life - and he's used to a fair few more than most of us. If the camp was all men or just segregated, there's not a big chance he's going to get his end away. And this was to be the rest of Alan B'Stard's life? A man so obsessed with money and power and sex that they're practically the only things he's interested in at all? What should he be reduced to if those things are ripped from him, and by Sarah no less? This was not how his life was supposed to play out.

Well, honestly, if we remove all of the comedy, I think it's got to send him into some kind of depressive funk. He'd feel awfully sorry for himself and would be incredibly angry and bitter, but with no real way to exorcise these feelings. I can see him finding the Piers-like members of the camp and holding whatever little influence he still has left over them - he definitely wouldn't be a nice person to be working in a labour camp indefinitely with - but he's been muzzled, no doubt about that. Doing all this manual labour and only for scraps might breed a bit of self loathing, secretly, alongside general indignation that he should have to do something so undignified.

Alan lost everything while he was in the gulag and being, as he tells us in S2E6, "a self-made lower middle class Tory who's pulled [himself] up by dint of [his] own talent and unscrupulousness" that's quite a big blow. The negative side to always looking out for number one has finally caught up with him. I don't think this would cause any great epiphany about how it's his fault he's here and how he deserves it because I don't think he honestly has enough goodness or humility inside him for that. Being kicked while he's down would likely just set off a cycle of festering resentment and self pity - I imagine something that might have sustained him would have been imagining all the violent ways he would end Sarah and Piers' lives if he ever saw them again. But, like I said, you're in the situation for so long? Knowing what you've lost? It's bound to depress you. Even if you're Alan B'Stard.

It makes sense that when Alan returns he seems absolutely fine, as I suppose he would never willingly let the likes of Sarah or anyone affiliated with the Conservative Party see him vulnerable or "weak". We know he is extraordinarily gifted at putting on facades. The show never explores how he may have been affected on a deeper level because it would have distracted from the main story and garnered too much sympathy for such a wicked individual, but I wouldn't be surprised if the gulag left him with some kind of PTSD, even if it's mild. I could see, maybe, @pizzagrlmeetsboy1980's Amelia coming in for that, even though it would probably disgust her on some level. I know this contradicts the whole "this man will always come back to get you, you can't put him down, he's a psychopath" thing Alan has going but... Even though he is evil incarnate, he is also human and we humans aren't infallible.

Although, I guess I'm being too realistic about the situation? 😂 Considering it's a comedy. But I know you were asking for angst and angst I am always happy to provide.

Thanks for the ask!

[fire-balls-wiftie]

Old cars

Flibbertiggibit🥶😍❤️

[neil-neil-orange-peel]

Flasheart! (Either or both versions)

Oooh, good choice!

Sexuality headcanon ~ Flash loves the ladies, we can't deny that. 😂 I don't personally think either Flash is interested in men, although I'd say Elizabethan Flash is the more likely of the two to be up for sleeping with one. A Flashheart from a series set in more modern times could possibly be gay/bi/pan, I just think the two canon iterations are pretty straight.

OTP ~ Bob. Though Flash is basically history's biggest hoe, clearly there is something that keeps bringing him and Bob together.

BrOTP ~ He's quite a solitary figure, really. For Elizabethan Flash I'd say Blackadder, but only up until he whisked away his bride. 😂 The Red Baron would like to think he and WW1 Flash have something - more than something - but that was one sided.

NOTP ~ He and Blackadder feels so unlikely and unnatural that I guess I'll go with that. They are black and white - literally, if you go by their clothes in s2. That said, if anyone wrote a fic trying to make a go of it I'd be thoroughly intrigued.

First headcanon that pops into my head ~ Apart from my continuing mission to connect all the Riks (WW1 Flash would be a distant ancestor and Elizabethan Flash an even more distant one), I absolutely believe that all Flashhearts are descended from Mad Gerald. I mean, that might actually just be canon, but still.

Favourite line from this character ~ I'll go with: "Am I pleased to see you or did I just put a canoe in my pocket? Down, boy, down!"

One way in which I relate to this character ~ Pffft! 😂 I don't think Lord Flashheart and I are very similar, I just find him funny.

Thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character ~ The thing about Flash is, he's supposed to be outrageous. Everything he says is meant to shock you in some way. He's forward, over the top, insulting, rude, egotistical, crass, sexist, insensitive, sexual with minimal provocation... All the kinds of things you'd hate in a real person. But he's not real, he's a massive exaggeration. And we all still love him. So, yeah, I suppose some of WW1 Flash's comments in particular are cringeworthy from a modern perspective, but that's kinda the point and the narrative knows this.

Cinnamon roll or problematic fave? ~ The Mayall answer to the swashbuckling hero trope? He probably lands closer to problematic fave than cinnamon roll. 😂

Thanks for the ask!

[neil-neil-orange-peel]

Any (or all 😂) of the Rik Mayall Presents boys

Hooooo boy! 😂 This would be pretty hard to answer for a lot of them so I'm just gonna stick with Dancing Queen's Neil.

Neil Brooks

Sexuality headcanon ~ He seems straight for all intents and purposes.

OTP ~ Julie! They're very cute together, although Neil does need to learn to stand on his own two feet too.

BrOTP ~ Sadly, it doesn't seem Neil has any real friends, unless he has some we didn't see in the film. I'm certainly not counting those posh knobs played by Martin Clunes and someone else (sorry, it's been a while since I've watched it 😂). But you know, it's never too late to make new friends.

NOTP ~ Sophie. It seems there were all sorts of issues with that relationship, even if neither of them realised at the start of the film. It does really suck for Sophie that she got stood up on her wedding day - even if it wasn't Neil's fault - but I don't think they were a good match.

First headcanon that pops into my head ~ I think he's a bit of a klutz. I mean, we have evidence for this in the form of him falling over after the window kiss. 😂

Favourite line from this character ~ Doesn't he scream "I'm getting married!" hysterically quite a lot?

One way in which I relate to this character ~ That sound he makes after he tries and fails to ring Sophie. The one that has everyone around him staring at him while he's sopping wet and wearing that super bright coat. 😂 I had to pause there and have a laughing fit. Weirdly relatable sound. 😂

Thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character ~ When he's being a bit of a dick. I know he's stressed because he's missing his wedding but that's not Julie's fault and he ought to have been more grateful she was helping at all. Luckily, he seems to get this and screws his head back on.

Cinnamon roll or problematic fave? ~ Neil's a cinnamon roll. He might be a silly little rich boy who has a breakdown at the drop of a hat because he's never had to do anything serious for himself, but he's trying. I think he means well. 😂 There are worse people on display in that film.

Thanks for the ask!

[neil-neil-orange-peel]

Some random questions:

Rick's hair or Richie Rich's hair?

Bottom show or Bottom live shows?

80s Rik and Ade or 90s Rik and Ade? (You can interpret however you like, e.g. based on their work, their appearance, what it would be like to hang out with them, etc.)

Alan B'Stard or Adonis Cnut?

Jackanory or Grim Tales?

Hello!

Has to be Rick's hair. The Ricktails. 😂 I know both of them have questionable doos but Rick's got the iconic-member-of-the-young-ones-squad hair vibes going for him (and he is young so whacky hair is to be expected) whilst Richie just... Looks like a prat. And the back of his head gives me second hand embarrassment for some reason oh gosh 😂 Richie, please-

Ooh tricky. I've definitely seen the TV show more than the live shows so probably that. I like to see how it and the characters evolve from the pilot to the final episode of series 3. The slapstick really cranks up a notch and the last episode in particular is absolutely wild.

80s or 90s Rik and Ade.... Welp. I am currently closer in age to 80s Rik and Ade so I'm gonna go with them. Alternative comedy first boomed in the late 70s / early 80s after all, so everything was still fresh and exciting. It would have been cool to have been around when all the stuff they did in the 80s came out - The Young Ones, Comic Strips, The New Statesman, Filthy, Rich & Catflap, all the stage stuff and stand up, and everything else - the main downside being, well, Thatcher. Although, today's government aren't any better. But yeah, Rik and and Ade in the 80s ❤️ special place in my heart.

Mwahaha! 😈 In all honesty, though I did enjoy Believe Nothing when I watched it, I unsurprisingly prefer The New Statesman and I think Alan B'Stard is an absolutely brilliant, brilliant character and that Rik's performance as him is phenomenal... So I have to say Alan B'Stard.

Another hard one! Rik's most famous spell on Jackanory was his first. His telling of George's Marvellous Medicine immediately garnered controversy, as well as proving what an engaging storyteller he was. Plus, he said in a Jackanory documentary that he learnt George's Marvellous Medicine off by heart rather than reading it off an autocue, so if that's true then that's seriously bloody impressive! That said, there's something about Grim Tales that I really love. His hair is all floofy, he has so many accents up his sleeve, amazing faces as usual, name dropping his kids, the ability to be engaging at all times. Fairytales and folklore have a darkness to them that I think Rik was a good candidate for expressing... So I'll pick Grim Tales.

Thanks for the ask!

[neil-neil-orange-peel]

"As far as The Young Ones goes, the only really likeable character is the one nearest to cartoon - Vyvyan. I think that's probably because - and this is no insult to Ade - he is the most amoral. Not immoral, morality doesn't come into it; it's almost like he has no brain, he's just two dimensional, he 'does', he doesn't think, and he often 'does' because the other characters are so unpleasant. He gets to inflict pain on others, it's almost like a punishment and the audience side with him. Vyv delivers the punchline - I'll be shouting and screaming about something and Vyvyan will come up and whack me and that's the conclusion, that's the punchline, literally. That's probably why he's the most likeable - because there's no consideration, no thinking behind it, no morals, he does what the audience wants him to do."

- Rik Mayall via Chris Shields, Early Rik: Thoughts of a Clown - Rik Mayall in the Early Eighties

[neil-neil-orange-peel]

Fresh headcanons hot off the press with @flibbertiggibit and @cloubdustings:

Jeremy and Anne from The Beat Generation are Rick's parents. I will make this work somehow. Just watch me.